Little Caesars 3 with Johnno Wilson

This is a head gun podcast.

Want to watch this episode?

Check it out on our YouTube channel at youtube.com/slash doeboysmedia.

I was expecting like four of my friends and my parents to buy the game, and that would have been awesome.

So, no, the entire past year has been a series of crazy events.

This was solo developer Local Thunk reflecting on the unexpected success of his indie game, Bellatro.

On February 20th, 2024, the pseudonymous Local Thunk unceremoniously released Bellatro, a deck building roguelite that remixed the rules of poker in a soothe core aesthetic, on the Steam Store.

With vibes aided by a looping chill wave score by composer Lewis F., the ingeniously addictive design would become one of the breakout hits of 2024, selling over 3 million copies by year's end and winning independent game of the year at the Game Awards.

In Bellatro, a core gameplay mechanic involves collecting and utilizing jokers, wild cards that alter the rules of a run and in so doing, guide the player's deck building strategy.

And while many might reasonably assume Bellatro is one of those made-up video game words like refantasio or revenge or undiscovery, it's in fact a brilliantly fitting name with historical origins.

Because bellatro was the term for a jester, or joker, if you will, in ancient Rome.

No doubt Julius Caesar and his grand-nephew, Augustus Caesar, were amused by the jokes and japes of Bellachros in their imperial courts, where they also gorged until they puked, and then fucked everyone.

In 1959, partners Mike and Marion Illich opened a Detroit area pizza parlor that's the namesake of both the last Roman dictator and the first Roman Emperor.

Its mascot would become a diminutive simulacrum of toga-clad Roman rulers with signature catchphrase pizza pizza, no relation to the Canadian chain of the same name.

The company's success led to a footprint as sprawling as the Roman Empire itself, and today it has grown to the third largest pizza chain by sales in America.

In 2024, mere weeks after the release of Bellatro, the chain debuted crazy puffs, cheesy, saucy bites with a form factor of cupcakes, and the once limited time offering has since become a regular menu item.

Bellatro seems set to be a time-stink fixture on smartphones and Steam Decks for the foreseeable future.

But will the crazy puffs sold at the Roman Pastiche Pizza Pie purveyor have similar staying power?

This week on Doughboys, we return once again to Little Caesars.

Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants.

I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host,

Obi-10-1 Kenobi, the Spoon Man Mike Mitchell.

Oh, 10-1.

Yeah.

A good day for that roast.

A roast for Mitch's tendency to delay production with long bathroom trips.

Let's make a tendency to delay production.

I mean, perhaps our guest can speak to that.

Let's make Theme Park Month happen and also come to North Carolina, Andrew, from Charlotte, roastedbirdFuck.com.

Not going to North Carolina anymore.

Why not?

After that shit.

Actually, it's not that bad.

That was not that bad.

Yeah, he wasn't making fun of me too much.

Yeah.

Maybe he could have been like Obi-1 one-inch dick Kenobi or something like that, you know?

That would have been more interesting.

I'm glad you explored where it could have gone.

Right.

Petey Pablo at the Oakwood while I lived there.

Pete Pablo.

North Carolina, come on and rise up.

Okay.

Take your shirt off and spin it around your head.

Okay, I know that.

I know that I've heard you.

I'm taking your shirt off and spin around your head.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I didn't know the artist.

Petey Pablo, yes.

Did you ever take your shirt off and spin around your head like a helicopter?

My guess is no.

I think I've done that as a little boy, probably for fun.

That's like a fun little kid thing, but not as an adult.

It was a fun, yeah.

That's like a frat guy thing, I feel like.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's a lot of frat guys have actually like, that's how a lot of frat accidents happen.

They like spin their shirt over the head and they fly off.

Go into the sun.

Go into the sun.

Oh man, Chibo, so sad.

We miss you, Chibo.

Cake stands.

And he took his shirt off and waved it around his head.

Go into the sun.

Fuck, man.

We miss you, Chibo.

Who's a pledge every year to this?

Seagap's numbers are dwindling.

Yeah, Petey Paolo is fucking,

he's hurt a lot of people.

Wow, it's a lot of, a lot of chaos this morning.

A lot of chaos, Mitch.

Happy Chew year.

This is

the Doughboys mainline episode

of 2025.

What a guest.

We're very, very happy.

We're recording this in December.

Happy Chew Year.

Happy Chew Year.

We were recording this in December of 2024 on the day of the headgum holiday party.

And I gotta say, I have never seen this many people at the office.

No, we don't.

It's crazy how many people actually work here when people like show up.

There's so many people here doing the job of putting up balloons.

And

we'll get to it, but the headgum hunks already threw me.

I'm already fucking pissed off.

Yeah.

We ordered Little Caesars, which I like.

You and I like Little Caesars.

We like Little Caesars.

The pizza of the working class.

We'll talk about it.

Emma and I were saying this in the other room.

We were like, we got a bunch of leftover pizza.

It's going to be great because the headgum holiday party is tonight.

That's right.

And we can eat some pizza after we've had a couple drinks.

I come in here, Emma's like, the hunks took all the pizza.

There's a table full of hunks that is in your eye line.

You can watch them.

And they're all sitting out there at what's ostensibly a workstation.

They're all just chowing down on the pizza that we ordered.

Yes.

It's so, and my blood is boiling.

It also came about, like, all the hunks were like, oh, none of us have ever had it.

It's crazy.

Yes, which is insane that none of them ever had it.

They're all.

Damn, I miss Chibo.

Tonight's party is dedicated to Chibo.

They never had Little Caesars.

They're all eating it in my direct eyeline.

It's bad.

And also, you said this great thing is that they're going to maybe have to take a shit for the first time that they've ever been here.

They've never shit at the offices before.

Now they can finally discover the the horrors of the headgum echo toilet.

You said a couple of things that were funny, and I forgot them.

That was one of them.

That's all right.

But also, no, it's not all right.

I should remember.

And then you say more funny things on the podcast.

Here's the other thing, though, too, is that they just ate lunch.

They just had lunch.

They just got their lunch delivered.

Got that hunk metabolism.

This fucking place.

And we also said we'd close the curtains, and you said, no, keep them open.

Good point.

And so

Amelia went and asked for a slice.

And now I feel that you like

the task.

I wanted one slice of Detroit.

So this is what this is right here.

And then, like, came in here and like visibly gave me the slice that I just put on the.

So all the hunks know.

Like I said, it's like the fat kid asking for another piece of cake.

Yeah.

She walked in like she was like presenting

like a scepter to a lord, just like holding it aloft.

Like, here you are, sire.

And they all fucking saw it.

They were

all sad.

All the hunks saw it.

I also liked that our guest was like, those are hunks.

Fuck yeah.

He's very hunky.

Yeah, yeah.

He's a fucking alpha hunk.

Fuck you, hunky hunk.

He would never be friends with Chibo.

Mitch, I do want to get to our guest and I want to get to the drop, but I have one other thing I wanted to bring up top.

So I've been dealing with orofacial pain.

I've been dealing with my jaw.

It's all fucked up, but you maybe have heard it a couple of times while we were eating that, you know, it pops out a socket on the right side.

So I saw an or...

It's a lot fun to witness for me.

I feel bad for you when I see it happen.

I saw, thanks, buddy.

I saw an orofacial pain specialist yesterday.

I want to shout out Snoopy Blah in the dose guard who recommended someone with that specialty.

And as part of it,

my mouth got measured.

And I actually have this device here that was invented by Dr.

Hershinger, who I saw.

This is the gentle jaw.

And he measured my mouth and said it was in the top 1% of mouth sizes.

Wow.

And so I have the gentle jaw here.

This is like a mouth stretching device.

Are you trying to make your jaw bigger?

No.

Well, here's what I'm going to say.

This is the largest of the three sizes available.

And I will go to the largest setting here.

Wow.

It'd go even bigger.

Yeah.

Isn't that crazy?

He said it was one of the top 10 biggest mouths he's seen in his career.

It was a guy guy who went to the bottom of the book.

I think in his book of World Records or something, I wonder.

This is why we're the doughboys, baby.

I know.

I was born to eat.

Born to eat, born to talk.

You do have a fucking big mouth.

I agree with the whole mouth.

Yeah.

Never seen it.

Or is it the other way?

It's either way.

So, this device will stop you from going down on yourself.

Is that what I mean?

Animal Elector Mouth.

Also, why, because it's a new year, we can say say come again.

I just want to remember.

Last year, our resolution, which we held to.

Yeah, we held to.

I thought we didn't say the entire single time last year.

No, we didn't, and it was great.

Our guest is mortified, doesn't know what podcast he's on.

Wise, I had, I've also gone through as some health stuff this last year, which actually our guest and you both know about.

Yeah.

And then I'm taking this drug right now, and I forgot it on the day of the record.

But I think that possibly all my,

you know, my, my, my dizziness and my, uh, my brain fog was secretly migraines that weren't showing up as headaches.

So I'm taking this, this drug.

Wow.

Not to po, not, we're not to push drugs, but I'm taking culipta.

And I forgot it, and Amelia had to go back to my house and get it because we thought I might as well have a good record.

Very nice of her to do that.

Extremely nice, yeah.

She also sent over some pics of Wally and Irma.

She did.

That was very cute.

She FaceTime was with Wally and Irma.

Irma came up and said hello.

Wally was a little bit scared.

He was on the stairs stairs saying hi.

Wait, so Amelia today went to get you your medicine and a piece of pizza.

Amelia's really

a mummy.

I was gonna say she's gonna be a good baby dessert.

She's earning that Christmas bonus today.

Yeah, she certainly is.

Which sadly the Christmas bonus was the leftover pizza.

Wow.

Wow.

What a start to the day.

What a start to the day.

And Mitch, what a start to the podcast because we have the winner.

That dude just threw that last of his slice in the trash.

I saw it.

A single nibble taken out of a corner.

This won't do for me.

And carry a salad out the door.

You're taking your medicine right now.

You're taking a little sip of liquid death as you do so.

We had the drop-off with the Drop King Robert Persinger as one of the judges, along with Emma and Casey and Amelia, and you and I to pick the...

I got a pitch.

Yeah.

Liquid Death.

They should come up with a line called solid death.

Popsicles.

Kind of following the water popsicles.

Yeah.

Flavored wife.

Ice cubed.

Yeah, flavored water.

Yeah, that's fun.

That's fun.

I like this.

Pitch, I like this bitch.

Thank you, wise.

It's also, it's very metal gear.

We have liquid snake and solid snake.

So I think that's fun.

You did hold up.

Oh, maybe I

did hold up plain water and said solid death.

So it would just be an ice cube.

They go after the head gum hunks a little too much for you.

Choose your fucking side, Casey.

God.

This gives me a little bit of tummy troubles.

This key.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm sure the little Caesars will help.

So we had the drop-off as our final Patreon episode of 2024, where we picked a winner of a bunch of users.

There's a baker's dozen of listener-submitted drops.

Great, great drops all around.

But we picked the best of all as our winner.

That was the winner of the drop-off, and that will be played whenever you queue it up.

What the fuck

to Spoon Nation, Emma hit him with a drop,

Mitch.

At some point, did your mom hold up a spoonful if it didn't have a pecan on it?

And she was like, No pecan, no pecan, no pean.

Ooh, exciting,

It feels like shit.

Because last night,

I choked on a Cheez-It.

I choked on a Cheez-It.

I was choking on a Cheez-It.

I choked on a Cheez-It.

I choked on a Cheez-It.

I was choking on a Cheez-It.

I choked on a Cheez-It.

I feel like it's in my, uh, what's it called?

My sinuses.

Oh, I thought you were trying to think of the word for throat.

I don't remember you making fun of me at the end of it.

Wait, i don't either

did we cut it off

by stream yard or something i don't think it would have won

i liked it

wow a great drop and a fitting winner of the drop off i'd say a very fitting winner except again i don't like the the ending there um

hey doughboys kenny here i made the dead man's hole drop I occasionally save random clips of Doughboys when I hear rhythms or melodies in a funny phrase you say.

These were two of my favorites, so I mashed them up.

This is definitely not as good as Dead Man's Hole, but I hope you still enjoy it.

By the way, check out my remix on the Duts remix album and shout out to Alex B in Massachusetts.

That's Kenny Gray.

Wow.

Kenny, nice work.

And I, you know, we all have our own self-assessment as creatives of our own output, but I think there's something that Dead Man's Hole did not win the drop-off.

There was a previous drop-off.

A great drop.

A great drop.

This entry to the drop-off ends ends up taking the crown so congratulations kenny you outdone yourself it was just funny that there was what are they what are those things where like uh you know like when you stack them up outside of buildings to work on bricks scaffolding scaffolding okay

i'm not that dumb

bricks

scaffold i just forgot scaffolding for a second

but it was very funny they were they were you know there's like you like you said the most people you've ever seen in here um

a lot of guys.

Yeah.

And then I just saw this poor woman by herself moving the scaffolding.

What the fuck is wrong with you, head gum?

God damn it.

Anyways,

she's back.

Oh, Marty, Marty.

Maybe Marty was at the front of it.

Or maybe Marty was just yelling at her and telling her where to put it.

All right, here we go.

Our guest today, an actor and comedian.

Wow.

From season two of Twisted Metal, coming to Peacock, John O.

Wilson is here.

Hi, John O.

Oh, hey, guys.

I'm so happy to be here.

Thanks.

My God.

Thanks so much for making time for us.

I mean, it's my pleasure.

It's my pleasure.

It was 15.

It was like 15.

I told you, like, we'll talk for five minutes.

It was like 15.

We talked for a while.

That's okay.

It was fun to listen to.

You were both being very funny.

Oh, God bless.

I got here by taking my shirt off and helicoptering it

to the studio.

I do remember being on the East Coast and taking my shirt off in bars and whipping it around my head.

When I was like 20,

22.

See, I would have gotten college.

I feel like if I took my shirt off in the bar, which I never would do, because I would be self-conscious.

See, I could see you really winning the bar over by doing that.

I think on the East Coast, not on the West Coast.

Yes.

Right.

Because I did it when I got to the West Coast, too.

So I guess I was like 27.

Nobody liked it.

Nobody liked it.

I think that I would be kicked out of a bar for doing that more so.

I feel like I would get the boot.

You too.

If you took your shirt off.

No, yeah, I know.

People would think something was going on.

100%.

What's a guy up to?

I i think those hunks do it yeah

they 100 do it 100 do it johnny you mentioned the east coast you grew up in massachusetts like the spoon man that's correct yes i did but i he's quincy which is like real it's like close to boston it's real boston i'm i grew up in shrewsbury which is like i was just

honestly i was just like a yuppie little shit.

Where is Shrewsbury geographically?

Central Massachusetts.

Central Mass.

Okay, so not only hard on Western Massachusetts.

I'm not being hard on myself.

Well, this is why I never want to tell people that I'm from Boston.

Sure.

Because it's not Boston at all.

You know, it's a little bit.

I always would say I'm from Quincy, Mass.

I'd be like, I'm from Quincy, Mass.

And then they'd be like, where is that?

And I was like, outside of, like, slightly outside of Boston.

And then one time someone was like, where are you from?

I was like, Boston.

And it was a guy from Massachusetts.

He's like, we're from in Boston.

I was like, Quincy's like, that's not Boston.

And I was like, where are you from?

And he was from like Western Mass.

I was like, you can't say that to me.

Don't call me out.

I'm closer than you.

Yeah.

Also, I was like, I wasn't repping that.

I was like one of the few times I said it.

And I was like, ugh.

Yeah, you were just being a a little lazy geographically.

Yes.

That's fine.

We all use that.

That's true.

I was born in Boston, Massachusetts.

Is that not enough for you, you piece of shit?

This guy from 20 years ago that I don't

mad at.

Just like, I'll be mad at this in 20 years on my, probably my deathbed.

It took all the little Caesars leftovers.

Hopefully, you two are there.

You're in now.

Yeah, if we don't die first.

That's not going to happen.

Wait, you want us at your deathbed?

Is that what you're saying?

Okay.

I'll be.

All right.

Yeah, well, I'll be back.

No, I'm going first between the three of us.

Me first.

I don't know.

Because you want the attention.

I want the attention a lot.

Like, if you got really sick, I'd be like, too bad.

Bang.

You'd show up to his deathbed with a gun.

Guess what?

You'd be like, guess what?

This is my deathbed.

Bang.

And be like, Mitch was so distraught over his sick co-host that he couldn't take living anymore.

And that'd be like, that was the sad part of the story.

I'd be like, I'm fucking dying over here.

Yeah.

Throw me a bone.

They'd be fucking, they'd put you in a straitjacket where you're like, he wanted the attention.

Okay, so you grew up in Massachusetts.

You know,

we'd obviously talk about whatever bullshit.

We are primarily a food podcast.

You have any food memories?

And the shrews.

Oh, yeah.

The shrews?

Nobody ever called it that.

You know, my mom really didn't like to cook much.

So we would get a lot of great food from a Greek pizzeria called Shrewsbury Pizzeria.

Wow.

It's going to be a town.

I actually don't know.

I hope so.

I hope so, too.

Because it was great.

Greek pizza.

Yeah, Greek pizza, a lot of fun.

Greek pizza, funny enough, kind of has the texture.

And we got, we got, look, I'm going to just give a spoiler alert.

We got a most bestest cheese pizza.

Yeah.

And kind of of has the similar vibe to greek pizza yeah which is like buttery crusts kind of like a

almost like a like the bottom of it of it is like very uh like a bunch of holes you know what i mean like it's like very uh you know like uh you know it's funny you mentioned that like how often you remember like they would have big crusted bubbles on the pizza i like never see that yeah yeah and

i don't know what happened to the bubbles what happened to the bubbles i like the bubbles you bite into it it's empty i think it's fun i feel like everyone's like got really into the cuppy pepperoni and the pepperoni cups be had this resurgence but i think people forgot about the bubbles yeah bubbles are fun too so dave portnoy has just ruined pizza in america how so should we go after dave portnoy

seems like a good battle to pick

i think that like uh there's a very look There's all sorts of fun styles of pizza and like a big airy like bubbles in the pizza.

I think that that's fun.

Yeah.

I think people don't like if I think now there's like some pizza snobs that if you got bubbles on your pizza, they're like, ugh, I don't like the, I don't like the bubbles.

They're fun.

Screw that.

They're fun.

They're fun.

You don't want an old bubble pizza, don't you?

No, no, no.

But there's like one or two bubbles and you get one of your slices.

Yeah, it's fun.

It's fun.

Are you going to eat that slice now?

Because now it's, I'm just kind of looking at it.

It's got to be freezing.

No, you don't get the fucking slice.

I'm not saying I'm going to eat it.

I'm just saying, like, is it going to just sit there untouched?

You're going to have it at some point.

I'm going to have it at some point.

You're going to unhinge your jaw and fucking swallow it.

That's actually a question I had.

What is that thing supposed to do for your jaw?

Well, for Is it just to make to help you show off how big your mouth is?

No.

For people in the ordinary range.

You're going to want to take this.

For people in the ordinary range of mouth size,

it could stretch your mouth.

So, for instance, I've got this.

This is the big size.

This is the big boy.

Yeah.

But it also has a, you know,

a small, here's a small size.

Can I try the smaller?

And then a medium.

Yeah, you can try the small size.

There you go.

So what do I just put it in my mouth?

Yeah, you just kind of put it in your mouth.

So this, the, the, the part without the ridges goes on your bottom teeth so put that in your bottom teeth first and then just find the right opening and you can sort of situate it there and yeah the idea is what's the right opening like tense or like as far open as you can go pretty far open because the idea is to like kind of stretch the muscles of as it as i sit with the jaw mouth it is like oh this is like uh i mean it's not stretched this is the smallest one do you want the medium oh god the smallest one again

all right i'm gonna try the medium okay great so i was gonna say john do you want jaw but maybe this is gross.

It is, but you know, we did a lot of stuff on this show.

We did do a lot on this show.

No spoiler alerts.

It's funny because we can't even really talk about who you are on the show.

No, I don't even know if you're supposed to say I'm on the show.

We can say that you're on.

Yeah, okay, all right.

I think so.

Are you going to get in trouble?

Oh, kind of.

I don't think so.

I'm not going to get in trouble for saying you're on the show.

I'll text the showrunner during this show and we'll see what happens.

Okay, okay, okay.

But we had a lot of fun.

I'll say this.

Well, we'll go on with this first.

Yeah, so the idea is that you do it like a 30-second set, and it just kind of like stretches and strengthens the muscles of

your jaw, the four muscles that comprise, you know, like the opening and closing of your jaw.

And then that over time, Mitch is doing demonstrating it right now for audio listening.

For some reason, this looks like the laziest use in the world.

His eyes are just dead as he does that.

But over time, we can resolve resolve some of the like similar to the issues that i have or other issues people have just by having you know it's it's kind of like physical therapy for your job the reason if you work out exactly the reason i ask is because my fiancé who when this comes out she will be my wife wow

how about that how about that i asked jono to do a bit and uh we wish we wish you a silly spoof miss right a show at you at used to be it used to be now is at uh elysian theater yeah but neil campbell and paul rust and michael daniel cassidy host the podcast or host the show.

Uh, always a lot of fun every year.

It will be, it will be, it will be over at this point, anyways.

But uh, I asked Jono to do it, and I did a thing.

I did my bit was um, I saw Santa shooting oh Zempic standing on my bathroom scale last night, and at the end, I was gonna have Jono come out in a Santa suit with no shirt on, just like this jacket.

Say my line,

and this is why I'm so sad.

Go ahead, say your line.

Ho ho, hunk.

I feel great.

How good is that?

It was good.

It would have been fucking great.

I'll be in Santa Barbara for my wedding.

And then you did offer, you said,

should I push the wedding?

And I said, yes.

Please push, cancel the wedding, whatever you have to do.

But we love Ana Lisa.

She's great.

She's great.

What a duo, you guys.

But this is what I was going to say.

So she has problems with her jaw too.

And when she was still auditioning, we were doing an audition once.

And at the end of the audition, she had to go, like, she sees something and she has to act surprise.

And she's like, and runs off.

Yeah.

And so

we finished it and you're like at the end of the scene and she goes, and runs off.

And I was like, all right, that was good.

Let's just try it one more time.

And she's like,

and I was like, what?

Oh, my God.

What?

And she was just like,

and her jaw had dislocated.

Yeah.

And it was so terrifying.

And honestly, like, I'm usually not a man, very manly, to be honest.

But I like really, I stepped it up.

I found out where the closest hospital was and took her there.

But like, her mouth was just locked.

Yeah.

And they had to go in.

They gave her some drugs and just cracked the thing back in place.

Yeah.

Oh my God.

Isn't that crazy?

What a nightmare.

Yeah.

So I might.

invest in one of those.

Yeah.

I mean, it's, it's, you know,

I found it.

Is that a wedding gift?

So you don't cause me any more trouble.

I hate being manly.

I laughed when you did that because you're like, oh, you did a very good job doing that.

But also, I also laughed at you being like, okay, that was good, but let's do another tag.

You were very much in an audition, like a upper of audition mode.

Yeah, right.

I've said before that, like, the most, like, the, the worst, like, I feel like the meanest I've ever been to my mom is during audition.

Like, I hate, auditioning is a horrible process a lot of the time.

That's become more, and we've talked about the podcast.

And John, you've certainly experienced this too

as a working actor.

It's a process that became more degrading because things moved towards having to self-tape.

You used to go into a place to audition in person.

Now it's like, hey, shoot a video on your own.

And we have expectations for it to be at a certain level of audio and visual quality.

And also, you're going to have to find someone that, you know, some unpaid labor, some family member or friend to read against you to read the other lines.

Yes.

So it's a whole function.

And then you just send it out to the void.

Yeah.

And then you get this and then see their reaction

or anything like that.

No one watches at all.

And I told you that when my mom, I've said this on the podcast before, but when I'm auditioning and I do a line, like I say a line correct, basically, just get the lines right and do it maybe decent.

My mom goes.

And I go, Mott,

you can't do that.

And she'll just, she'll go,

just will nod.

And I'm like, every time during the thing, I'm like, you can't do that.

It's like distracting.

I'm looking at you do it.

It's adorable.

It's, she's sweet.

It's extremely sweet.

It's a, it's a, it's, in everyone I've talked to before, I'm like, oh, the, the people I love the most, I'll do auditions with them and then be the, like, it's the angriest I'll get.

It's not, it's, it's the, it's a, this is all the angriest I've been at you, I will never get angry at my mom that way, of course.

Wait, really?

The way I got angry at you?

You've never been as angry at your mom as you have been at me.

Is that true?

I mean, maybe once or twice.

Like as a teenager and then she chokeslammed my ass and that was over yeah

my mom spanked me so hard once i went flying up in the air and landed on the ground and my brother started crying

the pain from my ass went into my brother

i was on the ground and he was

uh your wife also has well your future your wife to be uh has My wife has a wife now, yeah.

Well, your wife now has a, has, also has a podcast.

She's a podcast.

Yeah, she does.

Yes.

Wow.

Yeah.

Got to have her on.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah.

Want to give it, want to plug the pod?

Yeah, I'd love to plug it.

It's called the Big Names Podcast.

The Big Names.

The Big Names Podcast.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Analisa Vanderpol and Christy Carlson Romano.

Wow.

Big names.

Those are big names.

Big names.

Who I met also.

I met your wife up in Toronto, Canada.

Toronto, Canada.

Ever do an episode on Boutris Boutris Gali?

It's a pretty big name.

I don't think so.

Who is Boutris?

Former UN Secretary General.

Oh, yeah, of course.

I like that you gave him the nice follow-up.

Who is that?

Oh, some guy no one really knows?

Cool.

Some guy smart people know.

Awesome.

Great.

Thanks for making me feel dumb.

Well, you did go to Georgetown.

Yeah, I did, but I don't feel like I really learned much.

But did you have Exorcist Stairs?

The Exorcist Stairs.

The

you must have seen them in person.

Oh, yeah, wow, bunch ran up a couple times.

Whoa, that's cool.

Wow, yeah,

they're not as close to the house as it as it looks in the movie.

Yeah, that's cinema.

They're about 30 yards away.

They cheated it a little bit.

There's no way the priest fell down those stairs, right?

That demon maybe launched him a little bit.

That's true.

That's true.

The demon could have launched him quite a bit.

Yeah, and they didn't want to show that because it could have been all the tension it built, and then you're just laughing at him going,

what's the demon's name in that?

It's Mr.

Howdy is right.

Oh, yeah.

I think there is.

Oh, yeah, right, right, right.

And it's scary, man.

The actual name of the guy.

It's Pazuzu.

Pazuzu is the demon.

That's his name.

I know, I know.

I say it out loud.

Your house is going to get haunted.

Don't say that.

Which is now the cure.

Now, hopefully this is the cure.

It's crazy that it was.

headache and I was dizzy.

There's a lot going on.

It was crazy.

Yeah.

Also, if I was possessed, I bet you even my possessed body wouldn't want to go up those stairs at Georgetown.

Fuck this.

You're like eating more pea soup.

But Demon just goes to hell.

He just gives up.

I was up in Toronto.

I was dealing with some stuff.

I filled John O.

And so Jono and I met through Haley Joel Osmond.

Yes.

He

put us together on a text chain.

He said, my buddy Jono here is, he's going up to Canada.

I just want to say that

I just completely, the first, I even realized that this was crazy at the time, but I didn't even know Jono.

And I was like, Toronto fucking sucks.

It was his first text message to me.

He's like, hey, man, nice to meet you.

Just so you know, Toronto fucking sucks.

I was like, great to meet you too.

Can't wait to see you this weekend.

So you immediately got the real Mitch.

You just right away.

Yeah,

I think you were in a bad, like you, you warmed up to Toronto, but at first you were pretty sour on the city because I think you were having a tough time.

I was having a tough time.

I think we had a good time.

We had a great time.

Yeah.

But he thought.

Marcel was saying, honestly, usually I'm a very positive guy.

Without, with not with you, I'm pretty positive.

I don't know.

Is your experience with Mitch of these pretty positive?

I mean, apart from his,

you know,

his own feelings about his own acting,

the locations we had to shoot at, some of the food we had to eat.

Yeah, he's

positive.

A lot of movies and TV.

A lot of movies and TV.

I'm critical in a way.

I'm critical of my own acting.

Oh, I also.

People.

Yeah, sure.

You do do a lot of self-criticism, but you were up in Toronto.

You did have a nice time.

I had some lovely food

in the brief time I was up there when we were doing Toronto.

You talked to Jonathan for about five seconds the night of the show.

We didn't have a busy night.

Yeah, we didn't have a lot of time to connect.

You kind of did just, you know, you kind of wandered away.

I said, wait, though, hold on.

Hold on a second.

He's trying to say that you big timed me.

I did not big time.

It's impossible for him to big time you.

He

I was like, the Twisted Metal crew was here.

You're like, hello, everyone.

And then you kind of just

went up the stairs and you're a lot of people.

18 people I was meeting for the first time.

Yeah.

And so it was like a lot of like, oh, hey, how's it going?

Hey, Nestor.

And I also was like in the middle of like eating my post-show meal.

So like there was a little bit of that too.

I want you to press that side.

Every one of those people.

Take out your smell thing.

Put it in.

Show them.

Hi, Weiger.

Check this out.

Oh, cool.

Mitch is my friend.

The live show is great.

Thank you so much.

Thank you so much for watching.

Yeah, it was so fun.

I was very happy to.

We did have a nice conversation.

I remember telling you, Mitch, I was like, oh, Jonathan is such a great guy.

Ana Lisa was there as well.

Yes, she was.

Oh, wow.

That's awesome.

Oh, did you?

You didn't remember.

You don't remember her?

I don't remember.

No, okay.

Did I meet Ana Lisa?

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

I think so.

Okay.

Maybe you didn't.

Maybe I didn't.

No.

I'll say you didn't.

I'll say we didn't.

You'll have her on the podcast.

Yeah, we will forget.

Exactly.

Yeah, 100%.

I'm trying to think of other big names.

Anyway,

you were up in Toronto.

You had a good time.

I had a blast.

You had some great food.

And I had some great food in the limited time I was in the city.

Any food memories of Toronto?

I mean, I know that you've already talked about Lee restaurant.

Yes.

Several times.

It's great.

Loved Lee.

I got a long name john jacob jingle higherheimer smith

i got one i got one do you remember this ricky tiki tembo no saw rembo chari baruchi pipperi pembo yeah i do i'm amazed you get

the whole thing i do remember that i had that book love that book yeah good book it's actually a pretty messed up book I don't remember what happens in it.

It's basically two brothers go to a well and one of the kids falls in and the other kid, the Ricky Tikitembo, goes in.

And so the kid goes back to his mom and he's like, mom, Ricky Tembo, no Sa Rembo, Chari Rai Ruchi, Pipari Pembo just fell down the well.

And she's like, doesn't, she doesn't care.

Yeah.

That is fucked up.

Also, us saying Pazuzu and you saying that makes me feel like there's big curse energy in here right now.

Ricky Tiki Tembo, I can't even do it.

I don't know what it is.

Yeah.

How do you, did you audition for the Ricky Tikki Tembo movie?

How did you, how did you do that?

I think we read the book a lot when I was a little kid.

And I always thought it was a melodic name.

I was a goosebumps boy.

Loved goosebumps.

I was in a goosebumps fan club in the basement of a bookstore.

That's fun.

Oh, that is fun.

A little creepy.

Creepy.

You have your own little Are You Afraid of the Dark situation going on?

It kind of was.

An adult was there, but you know.

I join it now.

Hey, buddy.

Check my mouth.

Errol Stein is good stuff.

I saw him at

him at New York Comic-Com where the birthday boys were there.

Wow.

Okay, so you had Lee Restaurant at any other favorites.

Lee Restaurant, there was an Asian restaurant we went to.

Do you remember that place?

Where

we had like a 10-course meal or something.

That place was so good.

We were eating, and it was like us at the end of the table and then a couple other guys, but mostly girls.

And we were like, both of us were kind of holding back on the first couple

dishes because we're like, we don't want to just eat everything and leave nothing for anybody else.

But then, but then there was like too much food.

There was too much.

You just got to go for it.

And wise, it was like the perfect, we were kind of heroes.

Yeah, because we really cleaned up.

We cleaned up.

The closer, as I call it, in a meal.

I used to call my sister the closer.

She got mad at me.

But like,

if you come in and you close out a meal, sometimes people are like, yeah, like, that's good.

It's a good thing.

And do you remember the name of the Filipino restaurant Mars took us to?

I can't remember the name of it from the middle.

Tanuno.

Tanuno, yes, thank you.

Tanuno.

But Tanuno was like a, that was another communal dining experience where there's just like so much food.

Yeah.

And I did at a certain point feel challenge.

We didn't finish everything, but we did have leftovers.

I do want to shout it out.

It was good.

And we reach a certain point where you're just like, all right, here we go.

You know, and you're just like picking up pieces of food to just try to clear the table off.

We probably went to Hemingway's the most of any place, which is just a fine,

a fine just a pub.

A pub.

But that's important to have.

Like, you kind of have your home base, but this place will get the job done, you know?

Mimi Chinese.

MIM.

You found that very quickly.

That was impressive.

Yeah.

It was impressive.

Thank you.

Ho-ho-hunk.

Oh, so to finish that story, I had to ask Dutton.

Wait, Dutton's doing it?

Dutton's doing it, yeah.

Oh, there you go.

I mean, I love Dutts.

And Dutton is doing it.

I mean, I now feel bad.

He said to me, he said, he said, I'm not the type of guy who to do this.

You got to get stanger or something.

You're going to play, you're a conk.

Come on.

You're, you know, like, he's like, he's, it will work.

Great.

Yeah, Dutton's hunky.

Yeah, he's hunky.

Great.

He's going to have a beard on.

It's fine.

It'll be great.

Yeah.

But I mean, you heard the read.

Yeah, no, no, you told everyone that Dutton was your second choice.

He publicly did you a favor.

Didn't even want the role.

He's doing it.

It's a nice gesture.

He's helping me out.

He's a good guy.

Yeah, he's a great guy.

I love the guy.

He's cool as hell.

Okay, so I also read that you're something of a linksman.

You've golfed.

Do you continue to golf?

Oh, yeah.

Okay, so I'm not a Glaxer.

Are you sad?

But you're a Lynxman.

You love Link from Legend of Zelda.

I thought you were going to say Sausage Lynx.

Oh, that's also true.

We're both Linksman.

We're a lot of Linksman.

We're all three of us.

Almost three of us.

Are you a Zelda person, though?

I'm not a Zelda person.

I never got into Zelda.

Yeah.

I was Super Mario Brothers and moved on to Crash Bandicoot.

Oh, hell yeah.

Oh, a PlayStation guy.

PlayStation guy.

Twisted Metal.

Twisted Metal.

Are you a PlayStation guy now?

Do you have a PS5?

I have a PS4.

You have a PS4.

And I got it because I was in NBA

2K18, I think, as the coach.

Oh, wow.

I'm like Steve Kerr.

That's awesome.

That's crazy.

You just did all the motion capture for the coach models.

Yeah.

That's amazing.

Yeah, we're just in a huge stage.

You know, you're just wearing like a skin-tight black suit and you have all the dots on you and everything yeah and it was me and michael b jordan wow yeah that's wild yeah so if you see like eric spolstra like complaining about a bad call like that's you acting that out that's amazing yeah yeah wow yeah that's crazy how long is crazy take to film just like three weeks wow yeah that's extensive yeah because they had a lot of cutaway scenes but in in that one it it looks like me it just looks like a weird version of me you know yeah um and they like tried to put some comedy stuff in there, too.

I would just improvise some stuff.

But it was very easy to shoot because the, you know, the

sound is right there.

The audio is right there for you.

And it's capturing every movement of your face and everything.

And there's nothing on

the floor.

So it's very easy.

Wow.

That's wild.

Yeah.

He's fascinated by this.

No, I love this.

I mean, have you done other video game acting?

No.

Wow.

That was it.

That's so cool, though.

He has a video game podcast.

I do, but I'm not, but I'm more, I'm more interested for the basketball side as an NBA fan.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ethiopiasti.

Wait, are you an NBA fan?

Not really.

Mitch and I are both pretty cool.

You're not like the Celtics?

I like the Celtics, but I watch the playoffs.

That's fair.

That's totally fine.

I've watched a fucking.

I'm pretty pissed off.

I have a problem with sports that just have too many games in a season.

The NBA has too many games.

It seems to mean more.

Yes, I agree.

The NBA has too many games.

They will never go back on the 82-game season.

Now they've added an extra game because they have the championship for the in-season tournament.

They're going to to do that because there's too much games.

You got guys that have to rest for you know, yeah, exactly.

I agree.

It's too many games, and I watched, I watched horrible regular season basketball last night, and it just felt like a huge waste of time.

And why was it?

Thumbs down on the in-season tournament.

Thumbs down.

It's kind of fun.

It's stupid.

It's kind of fun because it makes something out of the otherwise pointless regular season games.

What is the United Emirates Cup?

Is it what it is?

It's just the Emirates Cup.

That's for the airline, not the nation.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

Emirates NBA Cup.

Good.

Okay, wait, so you're a linksman, not in the Zelda sense, but

in the golf sense.

Yeah.

My understanding, I'm not a golfer, but my understanding is that a big part of it is like the clubhouse.

You're going to have like drinks or a meal.

The 19th hole, isn't it?

Yeah, the 19th hole.

Are you someone who indulges in that?

Sometimes.

Sometimes.

Sometimes.

Who is this?

What do you do with the 19th hole?

You have a beer.

Alien that doesn't know anything about.

There's a golf club.

Sometimes you have drinks and imbibe in there.

Is that correct?

What the fuck are you talking about?

I didn't say imbibe.

Well, i don't know i'm just trying to think of he's doing an impression i was trying to do some impression

some exaggerated impression some fucking shit word you'd say

you've never you've never been in a club no i've never been to a clubhouse have you

i have which makes me feel like

people are kind of calling me the silver spoon man my dad got into golf in his

honestly like in his 50s 40s 50s yeah i think if my dad was a golfer i probably would have my grandpa golfed but i just i wasn't the age it never lined up where i was down of course with him well my dad was a caddy growing up.

Oh, wow.

And then, and he grew up in Worcester, Massachusetts.

And then he was like, when he was a little kid, he was like, someday I'm going to be a member here.

And then he became a member when he was like 35 or something.

Wow.

I never went to meeting him.

I never got to play at that course.

That's cool.

I'm a Silver Spoon boy.

I never go to

Jesus.

Who's breaking in?

Yeah.

You know.

I know that.

He knows this.

Yeah.

Which he, which, which he had no problem with.

Weiger had

a big deal to Weiger.

It was fine.

It was totally fine.

I was just, I just was confused as to why you didn't mute it, but I understand.

Because, oh, oh, oh, it's still going.

It's really going.

Explain what's going on here.

Your phone just went off during a report.

No, my house is not being robbed.

There's just someone walked by, but it rarely catches those people walking by.

Those people are just walking too close to the fence.

They're walking too close to the fence or something like that.

I was going to say, your dad's from Worcester.

I never go there too much anymore just because I don't know if the guy who works at Tollbooth is such a fucking pain in the ass.

Yeah, what's he say when you go in there?

He says, Welcome to Worcester.

That would be a dollar ninety

ninety-five.

Is that what it is?

That's right.

Yeah.

Toll booth Willie, wages.

Wait, do I remind me what this is?

Oh my god, you don't know it?

Sandler.

Oh, Sandler.

Okay, okay.

Welcome to Worcester.

And then everyone's like,

Willie, like you small dick piece of shit.

They all just like make fun of him.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He didn't, he has no, yeah, I guess that maybe did that just stick in Boston people's head more, it may have been more probably, but I feel like I feel like if I've everyone knows it, right?

Okay, so you know Tollbooth Willie, I don't think I know Tollbooth Willie.

If I brought up now, I feel insane.

No, I've had times where people will say, Welcome to Worcester every time I say, you know, my parents are from Worcester.

My sister went to Assumption, which is in Worcester.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I took my French class at Assumption my senior year in high school, humble brag.

Wow,

humble brag.

Me and one other guy.

Our friend Harris created that word.

That's the truth.

Harris, yeah.

That is, look, I get a little humble brag myself.

Sounds like that.

Wow.

Do you have a humble brag for us?

Let's see.

Do I have a humble brag?

I have one of the biggest mouths in the world or whatever.

I guess that's not a humble brag.

It's just a brag.

Yeah, that's the whole thing is that the line got sort of

the line got hazy between what is a brag and what is a humble brag.

What is the where I am falsely?

Yeah.

Actually, mine was just a straight up brag.

Exactly.

It was just a brag.

I I wasn't humble about it.

A humble brag would be like,

oh, I got in the, like, I got into the final two for the audition for this movie, but it went so bad.

Like, that's like, yes, yes.

That's the sort of level of Emmy losing writer.

Yeah.

Yeah, whatever the fuck.

Yeah,

that sucks.

Ugh, my mouth's so big, the stretching appliance won't work on me.

You're proud of that?

He's humble about it.

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And I'll say this also about Harris Whittles, and I don't know if this is a great time to segue.

The first time I ever saw the Detroit style or deep dish Little Caesar pizza, which I don't know if it's different from Detroit style.

Because this was years ago.

Yeah.

Was at Harris's house and he was like, I was like, you got that?

He's like, yeah, it looks good.

And I was like, I thought it looked good too.

Was it from Little Caesars?

It was from Little Caesars.

So it was not, this was definitely not the Detroit style because that's new.

This was their old, their old deep, deep dish pizza.

And then they refurbished it/slash rebranded as Detroit style.

The chain is from Detroit.

But that, that's a thing that's happened since our most recent record when we did Little Caesars in 2021.

Don't kill me here.

Is Detroit style pizza like a known thing?

Like, I've heard Chicago style.

It is a known thing, but it was not, I don't think, a nationally known thing until relatively recently.

Until Little Caesar.

Caesars.

It's been a thing that's existed.

I mean, the buddies and Jets, like, you know, there are these Detroit institutions that have served the style of pizza for many, many years.

It's very similar to what this was, except usually there's middle pieces, and it's not two separate kind of pizzas or whatever.

Okay.

And, and, you know, it's.

I like this pizza, but

it's better than that.

It doesn't seem like you like it.

You left that piece untouched for 40 minutes.

Little Caesars was founded in 1959 in a suburb of Detroit.

It is the third largest pizza chain in the U.S.

Reviewed twice previously, most recently in 2021, as I mentioned with Dave Nier and Marissa Pinson, our good buddies.

And our guests, Mitch,

kicked it out of the Golden Plate Club.

It was in there.

You and I voted to re-up it, but it got ejected.

Wait, who kicked it out?

Nier and Pinson.

What the hell were you two doing?

What were you thinking?

I'm mad at them now, too.

They kicked it out of there.

Well, now I'm putting too much weight on us.

We'll see.

No, I want our guests

to be candid and honest, and I trust that he will be.

Since our last record, they have debuted the Detroit-style pizza and

Swigs, Celsius.

Have crazy puffs, which we will talk about.

But, Jono, this, like the Headgum Hunks, was your maiden voyage with Little Caesars.

Yes, it was.

You've never had it before.

What's your pizza preferences in general?

Well, you know, I think

in college, I was a Domino's boy.

Yeah, sure.

Sure.

Right?

Love Dominoes.

Kind of grew out of the Dominoes.

Wow.

Then in LA,

I really, when I lived in West Hollywood, I went to Ghost Pizza a lot.

You ever been there?

No.

Scary.

I don't know.

This is a cursed episode.

This is a cursed episode.

This is a cursed episode.

It's a ghost show.

And now I'm real high on Prince Street Pizza.

Yeah.

We have to, we have to, we have to, we have to, we have to do a Prince Street.

We almost, you suggested it, but look, it's a complicated thing.

We can't get into it too much.

Yeah.

I'm going to get into it.

Susser went to the Prince Street location up in North Hollywood.

Yes.

And

the guy that works there is a fan of the pod.

Right.

He

wants us to take a picture and put our picture on the wall.

Okay.

Now, the Doughboys can't be bought.

This is a tricky one.

The Doughboys can't be bought.

I do kind of want my picture on the wall of a pizza place.

My picture on the wall of a pizza place is pretty awesome.

It's amazing.

Our buddy Ryan Prez, by the way, good buddy Ryan Prez of the Mama Needs a Movie podcast

also had the same experience at Prince Street and was recognized by virtue of a connection to Doughboys.

Every time I walk in there, I hope that someone's going to say, can we get your picture on the wall?

But nobody knows who I am.

Made it happen now.

It might happen now.

I mean,

we'll see.

We'll see what happens.

Fingers crossed.

It ends up just being John O on the wall.

They don't want the Doughboys anymore.

We put the Doughboys' picture on the wall, but a lot of customers left.

We have John O and then the Doughboys, and it's before and after.

So you've never had it.

You like Prince Street?

But there is a Canadian chain that is relevant to this, which is Pizza Pizza.

Now, Pizza Pizza is unrelated to Little Caesars.

Little Caesars has the slogan, Pizza Pizza, which they cannot use in Canada because it's trademarked there.

Did you have Pizza Pizza while you're up there?

I did not.

Mitch, did you have pizza pizza up there?

I did.

Yeah, it was on set one night.

Were you not there?

When we were in the, when we were in the, uh,

I can't, I probably can't even say we were in hamilton i'll say maybe

we were in the location in hamilton no i remember when they brought the fast food there but i don't remember the pizza they brought it i think they brought a pizza and i had just like stuffed my face with crafty so i wasn't hungry or something it didn't look like it was worth it to me honestly it i understand it was like it reminded me of old school dominoes before they changed their recipe which i kind of liked it was maybe not worth it yeah a w was the fast food that they brought that yes that was good that actually rocks that really hit the spot oh man.

That's good.

And we had great pizza out there.

Yeah.

We did.

And Hamilton, special.

Cowabunga pizza in Hamilton.

A lot of fun.

Great name for pizza place.

There was a great name.

There was a couple other places in Hamilton that are really good, but then north of Brooklyn, that was one of our first.

That was like our first friend date.

Friend date.

Yeah.

How fun is that?

Do you remember what you got?

We got the one like bee sting or whatever, right?

Wasn't it?

Yeah, that had like honey on it.

Yeah.

Which I know has gotten a lot like a little played out, the honey on the pizza, the hot honey, but I like it.

Me too.

I like it.

Me too.

And it was below this bar, and they were doing a drag show.

And we went upstairs and we're like, can we just eat in the back?

And so, like, there's this drag show going on, like, two guys just like eating slices.

I'm like,

it was great.

It was great.

Drag show.

And then they were like, yeah, you can eat here.

And I went up and I ordered us like two sodas.

And they're like, Jesus Christ, like six dollars.

Like, there's seven for you.

The guy at the front was like, we're like, can we eat in here?

And the guy was like, yeah, you just got to like buy a drink.

And then that's what we got.

We soda.

We got some sodas.

It was great.

It was a great day.

I know that they were upset with us.

It was

fine.

There was nobody sitting at those two tables that we took up.

So we had, so Amelia hopped in the studio.

We had a, there was a little bit of an ordeal picking up our group order.

So I went on my own for lunch earlier this week because I just didn't want to overindulge before we recorded.

I know, but I ended up just eating like, I think as much little Caesars as you guys did.

So jokes on me.

But Amelia, you picked it up.

There was a little bit of a kerfluffle.

What happened?

I went to the wrong location.

Now, how did this happen?

When I was ordering it online, I pressed the Vermont location.

Little did I know, there were two Vermont locations.

Two Vermont locations.

Now, so you go to the wrong one.

Do you go there?

And like, how long does it take you to figure out what happened?

The woman at the register,

she was like, that'll be $7.59.

And I was like, I already paid online, and this order is way way more than $7.

Was there a non-email?

Yeah, I think, yeah,

the order was under someone's name that sounded similar to a not Amelia.

And the woman seemed like she dealt with this constantly.

She was like, you probably ordered to the other Vermont location.

This happens a lot.

Yeah.

So I checked, and lo and behold, wrong location.

Was the other one further away from the...

It was further away, but only by five minutes.

It really wasn't a big deal.

They're pretty close.

those two those two vermont ones so we had the same thing happen i was telling you previously this was with the dillboys podcast this was the this was a little i think this was actually maybe a tournament episode when we did little caesars uh with kimberling yeah with gimberling for the slices right um back for munch madness and and i i what happened is i think you placed the order yeah I could be wrong about this, but I remember that you placed the order and you said it was at the Vermont location.

I went to the Vermont location.

It was the wrong Vermont location and eventually figured it out, went to the other Vermont location and picked it up, brought it there, was telling this on the episode.

And then you got mad at me because you thought I was blaming you for this when I was just trying to be like, hey, this was like a funny anecdote.

So I think everything ended up working out.

It sounds like it was your fault.

Well, again, all the information I had was Vermont location.

So I did it.

So, and the name, and the name, Emma, thank you for reminding me, which the order was under Mario because he thought it was funny.

Was I wrong?

It was funny.

It is funny.

It's funny.

It is funny.

It's very funny.

But I could see how that maybe would confuse things.

I like that you had to go into multiple places and be like, it's me, Mario.

It worked out.

It worked out.

But yeah, this is a known issue with the LA Loyal Caesars.

There's two of them on the same street.

Yeah, they must have to deal with it constantly.

I'm sure they do.

I feel like it's like California Chicken Cafe or something that says like, make sure you're picking it up from the right address.

Oh, yeah.

Smart.

how are they not doing that yeah with everyone on the on the same street yeah they really should have that warning uh here's what i'll say you know how you say everyone is here you know how you say that everyone is here everyone is late today and we were all late everyone was late not me not jono jono was right on social media casey was on time

casey was on time casey and i were hanging out here talking

everyone i watched i literally texted casey and i said we are in true doughboys fashion all running late if jono beats us there, can you let him in?

I said, Very chill guy, should be good.

And he found out I wasn't.

What kind of operation is this?

I came in here and I was like, sorry, because I was the first of the lates, to be clear.

Yeah, it's true.

And I walked in.

I was like, I was like, oh, you're here.

And he went, yeah, because I'm a professional.

That's what he said when I walked in.

I was jonesing for some little Caesars.

Well, we got, well, we certainly got some Lil Caesars.

Oh, we got some Lil Caesars.

Before the Hunks took it.

I will say, did you order on the app?

What did you use, Amelia?

I use their online website.

Okay, because I use the app and I do like

thinking of the Hunks right now being like,

what the fuck's happening?

See a brown thing in the toilet?

What the fuck?

What is that?

So

I do like the app.

The app's not crap.

I think the app is pretty elegant and pretty straightforward to use.

The pizza portal, which is the pickup apparatus, I feel like that is cumbersome and unnecessary.

Did you use the pizza portal or did you just hand it to they just hand it to you?

I didn't use the pizza portal.

The location I went to is the pizza portal, which is like an Amazon locker for pizza.

Mitch is stretching his mouth out for our audio listeners.

It's like an Amazon locker.

It helps stretch your jaw so it doesn't go out of place.

This is the gentle jaw.

You've never seen one of these before?

I got his jaw like that.

Oh, wow.

Turns out Weiger's jaw stretches further than they can.

The biggest mouth in North America.

This is the biggest side.

He is a bigger mouth than 99% of human beings on the earth.

I'm in the top 1% of mouth sizes.

I wonder why he can self-soft.

Thumbs up, Amelia.

That's two references.

We're going to get a little bit of a tip.

Which you maybe didn't even know, but now you

know,

the legend has preceded the man.

The pizza portal is like an Amazon locker.

Oh, he's really barreling through it.

Pizza's in there.

Just move forward.

You have to scan a QR code from your order, and then it like automatically opens.

And I was like talking through it with a guy who's super duper nice.

Is this in a store, though?

This is in the store.

So there's a guy there, and he's like, heated?

He's like, yeah, it's like heated.

He's like, I could just hand it to you, but it's like harder for me to get it.

Like, it was like the way it was set up.

So I was like, okay, I'll just scan it.

And then it opens up.

I take my thing out.

But he's still like, but I have to get your sauces because your sauces are still separate.

So we still had to fulfill that part of the order just as for normal.

It just felt like an extra step for no real reason.

So everything is ready there?

Everything you say.

They're just like, we know people are going to want pepperoni pizzas.

So we have 10.

No, this is not the hot and ready situation, which they do have.

They do have hot and ready pizzas, which are just prefab pizzas, which you can just grab and go.

Those used to be $5, a little bit more expensive now.

This is still something that was made to order, but then they made it to order.

And then they kind of shoved that some bitch in the Amazon locker for pizza, the pizza portal, and then it was just idling there for someone to come and pick it up.

Uh, presumably contact list, but there actually was still contact list.

But you've ordered that some bitches, I've already ordered it before, yeah.

You ordered that sunbitch before you got in there.

I ordered that bad boy before I got in there, yeah.

You changed it to bad boy,

he was trying to make it work with you.

We needed the third, we needed the third sunbitch.

Yeah, yeah, that's some bitch.

Uh, I think that it would be hard for me to not walk through the pizza portal

to see what's on the other side,

of the looking glass

yeah i mean it sounds

i would i sounds pretty good i'm gonna stay

closing the oven doors

uh is it is it's it's basically just like a heater right it's like it's like 200 degrees or something it's just a heater but it's one of those like they can put the cups in there the cups are cold it's one of those useless technology things i feel like it's just like why do we have this extra step here it's like we have this cool thing that nobody uses or wants to use or it doesn't work yet it's a pain in the ass for the consumers and for the people who work there, but whatever.

Do you ever, you got, you got like Beetlejuice mouth, by the way.

You know how like they open, you know what I mean?

Like how they and the Beetlejuice.

Oh, because they opened so yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You really do.

I mean, I've always said it, but you got coins.

You got a big mouth, yeah.

I think it's a cool thing.

I think it is cool, too.

It is.

There used to be a Ghostbusters toy where the guy's mouth opened really big.

I remember that.

I had that.

It was a fucking good one.

Yeah, that was a good one.

That was cool.

The jaw dropped out.

Yeah, it was pretty freaky.

And then you got to put a little piece in there.

There was a little toy.

And then he said i know one percent

uh do you ever do you ever do you ever microwave like i'll do this is like you'll get like a plastic container and then i'll just put it in the microwave and microwave it and i'm like i probably shouldn't do that it's probably not a good idea all the time

yeah it's bad though right but like every time it happens i ask and i do this yeah and whoever i'm with says yes and then i do it and i feel horrible yeah it is just like the especially a plastic lid or something That happens.

Like if I get chipotle and I get a size of cheese sauce and it comes, it has a, it's a

whatever container, like a, like a cardboard container with the plat with the plastic thing on top.

And then you microwave it and the plastic gets big and you're like, this is, it's wrong.

It's wrong.

I shouldn't be eating this food.

That's it.

Like, I should stop doing that.

I heard that we eat like the equivalent of a credit card in plastic every week.

I can't do it.

It's totally plastic.

It's horrifying.

Yeah.

Every week.

Yeah.

So just get over it.

I've also, yeah, it's happening and there's nothing to stop it.

The other thing I read was that there's an issue because, you know, a lot of human waste sometimes gets turned into fertilizer.

And

so what's happened is that because we eat so much plastic, we're shitting out microplastics and then that gets absorbed into fertilizer, which becomes part of the food supply.

So it's like a, it's like a self-perpetuating thing.

Plastic plants are growing?

Yeah, it's going to be, look, look, here's the thing.

Casey, you're a Cronenberg guy.

Crimes of the future.

People evolved to start eating plastic, have developed new organs.

Why are we fucking headed there?

It's going to happen.

That's that's fine.

That's fine.

Speaking of little Caesars,

service was great.

The guy noticed my marinara, speaking of things that he had to worry about.

The microwave wasn't sealed, and he fixed it and got me a new one because he knew it was going to spill.

So we got the crazy puffs they have right now.

So how would you describe these?

They're kind of like little cupcakes.

Little pizza cupcakes.

They're little pizza cupcakes.

And so we got the cheese and herb and the pepperoni.

I thought they were delightful little bites.

Not a thing I would necessarily get, like, because outside of the novelty of it, but they're just kind of fun.

Just like okay.

I think they're, I think, I think they're, I think they are fun, but I, I don't know if I would get them outside of the novelty either.

I know that one of our, one of the people on the

dais over here, uh, one of them, one of them, one of them, one of them liked it.

Only one of us?

Well, maybe multiple.

I heard one of you, I heard one of you really say that you liked it.

Casey, I'm talking about it.

Casey was that.

I'm like, why are you doing it like this?

I go, I didn't know if you want to be involved with the show.

It seems like you were shaming him.

No.

I'm happy for him.

Casey, I like them too.

I like them too.

They're fun.

There was the first one that I had had a little cherry tomato situation with it where I bit into it and the tomato sauce came out, but it wasn't too hot.

And I enjoyed that.

It was a little surprise that I enjoyed.

Yeah, because there is like the filling of like a hostess cupcake.

There is a tomato load in there.

Yes, right.

Yeah, yeah.

And so you liked it, Casey.

I like it because

it's like three or four bites and it's the edge of the pizza.

It's all edge.

It's all edge, and that's great.

Yeah, you've got a little crust.

You've got some crispy crust.

It feels like perfect for you.

That's my YouTube cover base.

It's a very sensitive.

Crispy crust?

All edge.

So it doesn't by default come with the crazy sauces, which is what they call the marinara.

I guess I said that's like, that's how I prefer my U2 or something.

That would have made more sense.

No, yours was good.

All right, that was good.

Yeah, we liked it.

It doesn't by default come with the crazy sauce.

I think it does need the crazy sauce because it's a little bit of a dry guy, even though, again, it's got the marinara load inside there.

It's you still need, I feel like it needs a little bit on the outside.

I enjoy dipping it.

Is the crazy sauce their tomato sauce?

Yes, yeah, okay.

Yeah,

by the way, not all that crazy.

I didn't find it crazy at all.

I found it pretty normal.

I got it extremely sane.

Yeah.

If by crazy,

the fact that it's like kind of cold, I guess that is crazy.

It is crazy that it comes cold, like out of the fridge.

It should be warmed up, and then they give you like a gallon of it, they give you so much.

Put it in the hot and ready fucking oven or the whatever, whatever the fucking line, the witch in the wardrobe.

Put it in the little Narnia closet.

Why not?

I did think the crazy puffs were fun.

Uh, the slices and steaks, crazy booths,

is that the pizza, pizza guy?

Pizza, pizza.

Yeah, that was pretty good.

That wasn't bad, that was pretty good.

Pizza, pizza.

Crazy poops.

You son of a bitch.

The son of a bitch finding out he can do a good impression of the pizza, pizza.

A little Caesar man.

I was doing Cartman.

Yeah.

Crazy Pooch now.

Crazy Poofs.

That's what I was.

That was my.

That was good.

That was good.

That was good.

Wait, have they always called the marinara crazy sauce or whatever?

Is it only because the crazy poops are a thing now?

No, I think they've done it before.

I think it's always been crazy sauce.

Who's the marketing guy that's like?

It's been crazy bread for a while.

Who's the marketing guy that's like, we got to call this tomato sauce crazy sauce?

Yeah, yeah.

What is so crazy about it?

They glommed on to crazy as part of their branding like 20 years ago, and they just continue to run with crazy bread.

Crazy bread, yeah.

Is that little Caesar is a crazy man?

I guess.

I don't know what it is.

Running around pizza, pizza.

No one liked my impressions.

Screw you guys.

I'm going home.

Hey, two brute.

You know what?

You know what?

This is, this came up.

I got made fun of for this, but I always associate.

There's Greek pizza on

the East Coast.

Little Caesars is kind of Greek-style pizza.

I always thought of Little.

I know it's supposed to be like Caesar from Rome.

Yeah.

But I always associate it with Greece.

I thought he was like a Grecon guy.

I know that this is dumb.

He does have a little crown of leaves on his head.

Yeah, which I think

is a good idea.

Roman culture was derived from Greek culture.

There's a line of continuity there.

I don't overlap.

I never put together like Caesar, like Augustus Caesar, or whoever we're fucking supposed to.

Like, I never was like, I don't even know if that's.

I think it's Augustus.

You don't think it's Julius?

Oh, I guess Julius would be the right one.

I think it is Augustus.

That would be crazy.

That would be crazy.

I think it's Julius.

Is it supposed to be Julius Caesar, though?

Or is it supposed to, like, what is it supposed to be?

Is Augustus Caesar long enough to be a long name?

He's like, it's right on the press.

A big name.

Big name.

Big name.

Big name.

It's close.

It's close.

If we knew his middle name, that would be a big name.

Yeah.

Now, why?

Because you know what's a good one?

Victor Wemba Nyama.

That is a good one.

That is a good one.

Yeah, yeah.

He's an NBA player for he's on the Spurs.

Yeah.

He's not in the UN.

He's not some UN fucking guy that no one else knows.

Long name tall man.

Oh, right.

I I know that's funny, too.

His name is the Greek freak.

The Greek freak, yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

I don't want anyone to say it.

Yeah.

Yeah, me neither.

It's been

this last week, has been crazy for CEOs.

It has.

It's a very smooth transition.

Also, like a month earlier when this episode, which is when this episode comes out,

this happened last night.

But we were talking about how great the little Caesar CEO is.

Yeah,

I don't know

how far we want to go, but just as CEOs go, a man who has,

you know, was held with some esteem.

I'm sure he has some flaws, but it's held with some esteem in his community.

They famously paid Rosa Parks' rent for her, the corresponding city.

Which I have beef with.

She took the seat from my great-grandfather Aldous Mitchell at the front of the box.

This is the whole thing.

Edit point.

Did he put up a fight?

Did he argue with her?

He was like, that's some icy seat.

Yeah, yeah.

Take that guy's seat.

That's why.

Big fat guy with a hoagie sitting there

after I'm done with my socks.

Rest in peace, Aldous Mitchell.

Great guy.

Yeah, great guy.

R.I.P.

Okay, so that was one bad day.

He was having one bad day.

One bad day.

You want to eat a sub sitting down on the bus?

You want to eat a sub.

So the slices and sticks jalapeno, which is

half of this, this bad boy's pepperoni pizza, four slices of pepperoni pizza.

The other side is eight Italian cheese sticks topped with jalapeno.

Now, look, I'm a bit of a heat seeker, so I was totally in favor of this.

Johno, you were saying those jalapeno sticks might have been your favorite thing.

Oh, I was saying that.

Yeah, those are real good.

I'm a heat seeker too.

I'm a heat seeker, too.

And

I mean, I don't want to go too, I might disappoint you guys right now, but I feel like that was the thing that had the most taste to me.

Yeah, I can see that.

Sure.

Sure.

I mean, I think that the jalapeno has added a lot of flavor.

That's a little flavor.

Give me some flavor.

And also because it's so like cheesy and it's, I don't think their crazy sauce or their marinara sauce sauce is necessarily a strength.

So something that just completely removes that from the equation, yeah, it lets you focus on the good stuff.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I liked it.

I like the texture of it too.

I do too.

Yeah.

I, I, I, I like the, I think it's a fun, I'll tell you where this is fun.

The cheese or the pizza and sticks combo or whatever the hell it's called.

If you're like a guy, a solo guy, if you're a single man, you're just at your house and you're like, I get half a pizza and I get some cheese sticks.

Like that's a perfect.

That is really fun.

That's pretty, it's pretty perfect.

And also you feel like that's the kind of thing, because I've gotten a whole hot and ready for myself before.

That feels like you're being a big fat guy because I'm eating a whole pizza by myself.

Those pizzas are not, they're not huge.

It's not a Prince Street pizza.

Like you can take one of those slices and throw it down the chute.

Yeah, you can, you can take a, but I'm, but I'm saying that to Mitch's point, if you're, if you're a,

if you're a solo, if you're an individual,

if you're one person, like just having a meal for yourself, it feels a little bit less, like less of an indulgence, like you're being a big fat piece of shit if you're getting half pizza, half sticks.

You know, I mean, psychologically, at least it probably does depend.

The sticks are thinner and you're eating it like a dainty person.

And you're eating two different things.

And I also feel better leaving a few sticks as like, I'll always want another slice.

So if I only have four slices to begin with.

Yeah.

That's pretty good.

If you're getting a pizza for yourself,

we house some of that North of Brooklyn.

I feel like we ate both of those pies.

Yeah, we did.

We did.

We did a good job.

There's like one or two slices left.

But North of Brooklyn, because we ordered larges.

Yep.

Great.

Great spot.

What's that?

Was North of Brooklyn?

Was it like a New York style pizza, I assume?

Yeah, New York-style pizza.

Very good.

Yeah, y'all kept talking about how good the pizza was up in Toronto.

I didn't get to happen.

I'm shocked.

Okay, so we also had the Detroit style, which, Mitch, you still have that slice of deep dish cheese just sitting right there.

Sitting right in front of me.

Getting colder and colder.

So we got one with cheese.

There's a microwave.

I'm going to put it on a plastic plate and microwave it.

It's going to be fine.

Wait, you're not going to have it with another plastic plate.

You want me to have it on the app?

Why do you want it just sitting there the whole time?

I like it.

It makes it feel safe.

It's his emotional support pizza.

There are no punk hawks walking around

stealing it.

Okay, so we got the deep dish cheese for today.

And I, on my own, when I went on my own, got the,

I got the cheese and herb crazy puffs, which I enjoyed.

And I also got a deep dish veggie.

The veggie is green peppers, onions, mushrooms, and black olives.

The things I will say, thing I will say about the deep dish, and we mentioned this earlier, there are no middle pieces.

It is four slices.

And if you get the normal size, like the large pizza, you just get two sets of four slices, two squares where it's all edges all the way around.

I think all corner paper pretty.

I kind of like it.

People like the corners.

I mean, like for what that pizza is, you do want like the crispy edges, which honestly, from what the Detroit style as opposed to the deep dish, there was a little less crispy edge than I wanted on this pad, but still,

it was still pretty good.

By the way, you're like a day walker because you're a very funny part.

But you can walk with the hunks.

You know what I mean?

Like, you're like a

day.

I feel like that's the highest compliment somebody could get.

It kind of is.

Wow.

Like, you can walk with the hunks, but then also, you're not.

I'm out of here.

You're going to go walk with the hunks?

Walk with the hunks.

You can walk with the hunks, but then you can come and sit with fucking pieces of shit like Wagga's and I.

Fitting great.

Yeah, you guys are always talking about being pieces of shit.

You're golden boys.

That's who you are.

Oh, come on.

What a thing to say.

You know what?

You're fucking golden boys.

We're golden boys, Mitch.

Golden boys.

Like piss, gold?

I think like the golden girls, so we're old.

Doughboys are golden boys.

I'm horny.

Who's your favorite golden girl?

As I get older, you know,

Dorothy is the funny.

Dorothy, I said Dorothy.

My favorite was the small, angry one.

Was that Estelle?

Estelle Gaddafi is the actor.

I always liked her.

Dorothy's mom.

Dorothy's mom.

What's Dorothy's mom?

Ma, but what is her?

I forget her name.

Estelle Getty's actual name of the show.

Ma.

Because she's Sicilian on the show.

Right, yes.

It talks about like the old country and shit like that.

There's nothing better than an old lady who's still got some chutzpah.

Yeah.

It's the best.

That was my Nana.

My grandma was more.

She wasn't.

Rose is dim-witted, which was Betty White.

Yeah.

Yes.

Great sitcom.

A great show.

I watched it with my grandma.

My grandma reminded me of

Sophia.

She was Sophia.

Sophia, of course, Sophia.

Think about that show being on now.

Never in a million years.

Never in a million years.

No.

But this was just this out.

When I was younger, and

I feel like I was like real, like...

So much of the TV I watched and so many like movies I saw, because this is also the era of Hume Crohn and Jessica Tandy as like A-list movie stars.

They would just have older actors in like high-profile roles.

Me as a kid, I'm just watching this like loving like Leslie Nielsen, thinking he's totally funny, you know what I mean?

And now that just doesn't happen anymore, just sort of casting.

It's like it's kind of a bummer.

It is, yeah, it is.

Because, yeah, that was a great show.

And then there was another show, Empty Nest, that was on afterwards that was also like it was like a senior sort of the cast.

And it was goes on.

Yes, and so do we.

So we.

Just what we do is no mystery.

Rain O'Shine.

I'll be the one

just like how we do it.

Something like that.

That's how we do it.

Yeah.

Rain O'Shine.

I'll be

just how we do it.

No, this is.

No, this is Empty Ness, the sitcom.

That was on after.

And my grandmother thought.

And my grandma thought, also, an older man who was the star of Empty Ness.

She thought he was a hunk.

Yeah, that'll happen.

Murder She Wrote.

Murder She Wrote.

Oh, my God.

Give me a break.

Yeah, I know.

I know.

She's solving murders.

I know.

She's 70 years old.

She's better than the best detectives.

She's 25-year-old whipper snappers.

What's her name?

What was her name in real life?

Oh, God.

Angela Lansbury.

Angela Lansbury.

R-I-P.

Yeah.

Well, they have, they do, you know, because they had Matt Lock, that was also the show of the era.

They're an old, smart lawyer?

Right.

Yeah.

They've rebuilt.

I know, I can't believe that.

Yeah, yeah.

Indiana Jones meets Matlock, as we know.

Right.

Indiana Jones meets Matlock was a big thing everyone was talking about last year.

It's the thing Mitch did on the show that no one understood.

What?

The idea is that's just like an old guy thing.

It's like, because Indiana Jones is so old.

And I said it was like, I was like, did you see the trailer for Indiana Jones meets Lap Matlock?

Everyone was confused.

Rightfully so, as you are now.

Kind of similar to what's happened, what happened again, basically, to you right now.

I think the deep dish is fucking good.

The deep dish is like the Detroit style.

And honestly, like that may just become my go-to.

He seemed so fucking old when we sang the empty nest song.

I just just looked at these three right here, just like

just staring at us, not getting what the fuck we were doing.

I think that's what I'm saying.

It's like, it's like when you have a reaction to the deus, though, right?

Do you remember when you, I mean, that is normally how they act.

The deus usually doesn't give us any laughs.

But, like, you remember when you, like, if you like, went and visited your grandpa or something, and then, like, he and he and his friend would sing an old song, and you're like, oh, good.

Like, that's not, but that's what happened with us right now.

She's my Coney Island gal.

My Coney Island gal.

People are like, people are like fucking crying.

Oh, that was my first dance at my wedding.

He's like, what the fuck?

Coney Island gal.

Yeah, you're right.

That's the thing.

We're making that transition into old age and being old fucks.

Not just fat fucks anymore.

Now we're old fucks.

This guy, 40th birthday in Toronto.

Toronto.

HBD.

Thank you.

Thank you.

So his first surprise party.

Our first surprise party.

Thrown by the one and only.

Got him good.

Got his ass.

That's a very Mitch thing to do.

Very.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was going to say, it was kind of funny.

The two ways where I surprised people on their 40th birthday hated me

and was very grateful.

Yours was the day after your 40th.

Was it a surprise party?

Well, here's the thing.

I turned 40 during COVID.

Okay.

So this was 2020.

I feel like that is like a monkey paw.

I mean, not even a monkey paw wish.

That's just a regular wish for you to have your 40th birthday be you have to be inside and no one can see you.

I'm not a birthday guy.

I'm not either.

Yeah, so I don't really do anything.

I love birthday flavor.

I do love birthday flavor.

I do too.

Really?

Oh,

I don't like what's going on here.

You and I are friends.

Yeah, no, no.

We can all be friends.

No.

Me and John are going to have a picture together at Prince Street.

I think it's,

I'm not a big, I like, I don't really celebrate my birthday.

I'll sometimes like go out to dinner with like my wife or whatever, but I'm not like, it's like, I don't, don't really care about birthday presents.

Mitch brought it, it was a very, it was a lovely gesture.

It was very nice, but I was just confused as to what was happening.

You brought a bunch of our friends over to my apartment.

You said, hey, I'm going to come over to drop off some tax documents.

I was like, okay.

I went downstairs to meet you, and you're like, oh, look, it's everyone's here.

And I was like, where are the tax documents?

Which I did give you them, didn't I?

You did give them.

I don't know if I forgot them.

And you got 40 copies of This is 40.

Oh, that's right.

I forgot about that.

That was funny.

40 DVD copies of This is 40.

That's funny.

Oh, my.

I have to give credit.

I think Van gave you that, which is

an annoying case.

It's a nice laugh.

And then after everybody leaves, you're like, what the fuck am I going to do with these?

No matter what you do there, you look like a freak, which is good.

Also, during COVID, you probably stuck with those bad boys for a while.

You probably just threw them away, is my guess.

I don't know where they are.

They're somewhere.

I hope you watch every storage unit.

They might be in this.

They become a, every time someone turns 40, you just give them one of those DVDs.

I should have thought of that.

That could have that could have become your thing.

Yeah, I could start distroing them.

Yeah.

Paying it forward.

Yeah, paying it forward.

Haley Joel Osman.

Hey, very good.

Wait, is he in Pay It Forward?

Yeah.

He's the kid in Pay It Forward.

I've never seen Pay It Forward.

I haven't either, but I know he's in it because I'm a good friend.

Fuck.

It's got stars, your favorite actor.

Who's that?

Kevin Spacey.

God damn it.

Sixth Sense.

AI.

He's great.

Great movies.

Oh, yeah.

He's great in both of those movies.

That was my like, wait, look, we had him on the podcast before and a great podcast guest.

If you ever

time, it would be great to have it.

Get him back.

Very, very successful career.

But just talking to him about that, he had such a healthy perspective on it.

It was just like, I'm proud of those movies.

Those movies were good.

Like, he's great.

He's amazing in them.

I was amazing.

I always try to talk to him about him a little bit, but I can never, I don't know if people want to talk about

stuff that they did 20 30 years ago or whatever so but uh but it is fascinating ai is great have you have you i don't know if you watched ai holds up so i haven't re-watched it recently but i love it it's a great movie i love it i uh

it's been a while since i've seen it but i remember i remember liking it a lot until i don't know the end kind of kept going the end is it does have like a it does just kind of end and end and has kind of a weird sort of yeah storybook sort of quality to it but i the thing that i never was just kind of like oh right this is spielberg He made it all treakly or whatever.

But then it turned out that that was actually all Kubrick stuff, which was interesting.

And it also is like kind of just sad and messy.

Yeah, it's sad and weird.

Also, Minority Report, a great, a great,

my favorite Spielberg.

Spielberg Renaissance.

Yeah,

those are fun.

My mom had never seen The Sixth Sense, and we watched it.

This was like...

two years ago.

Wow.

So we watched it and I was texting with a buddy and he was like, you have to record your mom at the end of the sixth sense because she legitimately had no idea what happened.

And I was recording her and she was sitting there and she was just, it was like getting late and she was getting tired.

And then it was like, you know, you see everything happening, and the wife asleep on the couch, and him being like realizing that he's dead.

If you haven't seen it, it's please.

Yeah.

You can tell our listeners are annoying, eh?

But she was sitting there on the couch and she was watching, and I can just see her like getting sleepy.

And then, as it was happening, she was waking up a little more and a little more.

And then she literally just went like this.

like, I had like a mini seizure,

could not believe it.

I was like, How this is

that's great, yeah, that's great.

I knew going into the sixth night is what had happened.

Oh, that sucks, yeah, it's a bummer, and then I left, and I was like, That was stupid.

I like knew it was gonna happen.

It's like, yeah, you hurt, like, you know, I was 13 or something.

Oh, yeah, I was completely surprised,

99, maybe.

Oh, shit, so I was 16, 15 or 16.

I was completely surprised by it, saw it in the theater.

I loved it, I loved, loved the twist experience, loved it, And of not having that spoiled for me.

Same thing with usual suspects under Kevin Spacey.

But that one I did not have the twist spoiled for me.

And so like experiencing it for the first time, it's like, holy shit, this is awesome.

The twist that Kevin Spacey is a bad guy.

Isn't that updating art?

But my dad, who's like...

He's just like, he always tries to solve movies.

He like figured it out.

Yeah,

he knew it wasn't 6 cents.

He figured out six cents.

That was like one of the first times that was done, right?

Of like he was dead the whole time, right?

Yeah, like you ever see the others, yeah, the others,

yeah, yeah.

There's another one that I was like

that is

that is.

Well, now our listeners are gonna be double mad at you.

They're pissed.

We've ruined three 30-year-old movies.

I mean, hey, our listeners are bad.

It's not your fault.

Wives.

Their others sort of suck.

Deep dish was great.

The cheese was better than you.

Did your dad figure out usual suspects?

That's what I had to know.

I don't know.

I'll have to ask him.

I like the deep dish quite a bit.

I also like,

which was, Amelia will tell you.

We were making the order in our Doughboys text chain.

That's right.

And then I texted her privately.

Amelia, you can speak to this if you'd like.

But I said, let's order an extra pizza.

Don't tell wives.

Actually, you want me to just read you the Texas Change?

Yeah, please.

This is at 12.28 a.m.

I feel like we should add an extra most bestised pepperoni or cheese onto that and not tell Wigs lol.

I guess if it's cheese, he can eat it.

And then Amelia said, LOL, why can't Wages know?

And I said, he'll get mad that it's too much, but it'll be a hit.

And was I wrong?

It was a hit with a hunks.

You were right on both counts.

Yeah, it was a hit with a hunk.

You were right on both counts.

I was mad, and it was good.

No, I like that.

I like that a lot.

I think the extra most bestest, which is basically just what they call it, the extra cheese pizza, but it's got like the right amount, right proportion of cheese.

It's kind of like

the cheese stick, honestly, in pizza form.

Yeah, I love it.

You also said when you came in, you were like, I did a fun trick.

I made Amelia order an extra pizza.

Like it was a magic trick.

You clever son of a bitch.

You clever son bitch.

All right, I'll keep going.

Add, so I said, add extra most bestis cheese.

We can discuss this betrayal tomorrow on the pod.

Hmm, though getting one he can't eat is funniest.

And then Amelia, well, LOL.

And I said, may as well let him eat a slice, little bitch, lol.

I'm pretty sure I was half asleep during this conversation.

I was up till four almost.

I've been getting good sleep.

And then last night

I had to change three litter boxes last night.

Oh, man.

Wally's Irmas and your own.

The litter robot.

When I go on the litter robot, that thing struggles to fucking.

Yeah,

the big three.

I had to change the big three last night.

It was a late night.

Extra rosbestis, cheese.

I mean, I think I like the deep dish more just because I like it.

I would say yes, but man, today, I don't know.

Today, maybe it was maybe Examosbestis maybe one.

Yeah.

I, we got, okay, let me just go.

We got the wings.

Jono requests the wings.

Can we talk about the stuffed crazy bread before we move on to the wings?

Sure.

Stay in Pizzatown.

Jono said he wanted to get...

Actually, this is another Mitch trick.

Jono said he wanted to get these bad boys here, which we got.

We haven't tried them.

He's the cookie dough brownie made with Eminem's mini chocolate.

They look completely different than they do online.

They really do.

And we were upset that they weren't warm.

I think we maybe have eaten them before.

Why?

Because I think it's a possibility.

I can't remember.

Maybe I have, but

we were sad the way they came.

But

Jono had taken a screen grab of those and then I sent them to you guys and the stuffed crazy bread was under that.

I said, Johno wants these.

And I said, you know what?

I'm just going to let the fucking stuffed cheesy bread slide because why not?

Wait, so he didn't, you didn't request the stuffed crazy bread?

No, I was like, let's switch it up from all the breaded cheese and do wings and then some kind of weird dessert.

Yeah.

Because you're a Johnny who wants these.

Everyone assumed you meant both things.

Yeah, I know.

It's not lying to you if I just didn't tell you everything.

But I realized everybody was coming in here being like, Johnny requested so much shit.

What a piece of shit.

What an asshole.

And he's there on time.

What a piece of shit.

I'll say this.

The feast.

It was a great feast.

The hunks are happy.

Wonderful feast.

And also still pretty cheap for all the food we got.

Caesar's price point is good.

No, yes, absolutely.

It's one of the

again, it's kind of the reason it's the pizza of the working class.

It's still pretty affordable.

That CEO, I mean, he's passed away now, but he helped Rosa Parks.

He kept prices low.

He seems like the best you can be in that role.

He seems like a good man.

And hopefully, there's no thing about him being a bad man, but he seems like a great guy.

I mean, I'm sure there is.

The only one spreading bad things about him is your great-grandpa.

Good old Aldous Mitchell,

who I think did kill

the little Caesar CEO.

I think he assassinated the little Caesar CEO.

We got to open these bad boys up.

I think it was a 3D printed gun and then hopped on a city bike.

What is the wait, hold on.

I want to talk about the stuff crazy bread, though, before we get into that.

Oh, it sucks.

Yeah,

it's not that good.

It's like a hot pocket filled with cheese, basically.

It didn't even seem like it was filled with cheese.

Well, not that much cheese, yeah.

No, I like took a bite into it and I was expecting some like mozzarella stick type cheese.

or nothing not a lot here's the thing is that

dominoes does a much better version of that they do this the they do their stuffed uh stuffed it's not crazy bread cheesy bread cheesy bread their cheesy bread and their cheesy bread is pretty good it is good they also already have the cra the the regular crazy bread or the jalapeno crazy bread which i'd just rather have that was better that was a much better version okay we we got the wings to talk about and then we got that i i don't think their wings are very good I got the, so I, on my own, I got the barbecue wings.

First off, the name, and I understand that they, they maybe just don't want to call everything crazy, but they're called Caesar wings.

To me, that's a little bit confusing, even though it's Lil' Caesars, because Caesar is also a flavor.

So I'm like, are these like Caesar salad seasoning wings?

They're not.

But

I got barbecue on my own for lunch, and I thought they were bad quality wings, but the sauce was fine.

And I think that was probably the case of the Buffalo.

I didn't have any of the Buffalo today.

John, I requested the Buffalo wings, and I said, you foolish son of a bitch.

You have no idea what the hell these are.

These are not good.

I mean, you're not a doughboy, so I get it.

I mean, I never had Lil Caesars.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

Fucking idiot.

But you wanted the wings.

We got the wings.

You wanted the cheesy bread.

We got the cheesy bread.

I didn't want the cheesy bread.

You wanted an extra pizza?

We got to get an extra pizza.

The wings there are not great.

I don't think that they're the worst wings I've gotten at a pizza place, but they're not very good.

I just just wouldn't, I would never, I would have no reason.

I don't think you would go to a little Caesar's for wings, yeah.

Yeah, hey, if you get a side of eight wings and someone at the party wants wings, they're fine, fine, they're fine, they're fine, they're fine, they're a little soft, yeah, a little soft.

The one thing I will say, because Nellie had some of those, and and she was like,

At least it's like real food, you know what I mean?

That's one thing about like a wing is like you're just like, hey, you know what?

This is like a thing that is like not like it's like it's like an animal part in sauce.

There's some protein in there, there's something of nutritional value, yeah, Yeah.

All right.

You have to shame us.

We know that we don't have any nutritional buttons because he holds his cookie dough in his hand.

Wait, I want to try one too.

So, what are they cookie dough brownies?

Cookie dough brownies.

Cookie dough brownie made with Eminem's mini chocolate candies is the official menu item name.

They come in a little bit.

Brownie toppled with cookie dough frosting and Eminem Minister.

I don't know what the description is the exact same thing.

So this is frosty.

They come in a little wise condom here.

Look at this.

All right.

Is there a knife or anything?

Oh, shit, I lost the M ⁇ M into the couch forever.

I don't know if y'all want to try this at all.

I'm just going to rip a piece off.

Amelia, you don't need to grab a knife.

I'm just going to rip a piece off.

A lot of.

There's a lot going on.

You want to walk those over?

Thank you.

What am I tasting?

This sucks.

This is not good.

It's not good.

It tastes like kind of like cardboard.

It's very Play-Doh-y.

Yes, Play-Doh.

That's what it's like.

the texture is not good the texture is very chalky yes the chalky the the frosting like it's not quite frosting it's kind of like like a uh a midpoint between frosting and like graham cracker crust it's supposed to be cookie dough right it is these suck i'm just really getting rid of it i want it out of my life it's bad yeah i don't want that did any of you have them yeah i don't like that i regret eating sucks right

Thumbs down, Casey skipping it.

I skipped it based on everyone's blowing or views.

The texture on the top of that, that like brown stuff on top, when Amelia grabbed it and broke it, looked like you know that foam stuff kids play with that you can like shape and turn into different colors and it looks

yeah, that yeah, exactly.

That's kind of yeah, kinetic sand.

That's like kind of what that looks like.

Oh, you know, kinetic sand, but not empty nest theme song.

Um, that was dog shit.

Can I get anything just kind of a general theory?

Can I say something about this?

Yeah, please.

Did I recall patchy stuff?

It is is Ungo Pacha.

Too much going on.

What's your theory?

Go ahead.

I don't ever need a pizza place dessert.

I think like the chain pizza dessert just does not need to exist.

Yep.

You disagree.

No, I think you're right.

Yeah.

Well, do you remember that hot fudge brownie they had at Domino's?

Which I think does still exist.

That was

pretty good.

Maybe that should be the only one that can exist.

Yeah.

I mean, it could be the exception that breaks

that, you know, I said the wrong way.

The exception that proves the rule, but also it, it could, I like, I'm also, do I even need that?

Like, if I'm like from Domino's, I don't really need that.

Like, when you finish from a chain pizza place, you're not Jones in for a chocolate piece of shit.

You don't

especially now.

That's fucking.

Yeah.

The real exception to the proves the rule is the BJ's pazouki, which is which is an incredible dessert, one of the best chain restaurant desserts, but that's also a sit-down place.

It's like you might have something other than pizza.

Well, it's also the thing that we talk about of like

all these corporations that then try to do everything.

It's like, you know, like,

what is a place that used to have yogurt in the name and now it just is

yogurt land?

Yeah, it's just land.

It's land now.

It's really weird.

Really weird move.

How Dunkin' Donuts has been doing.

Dunkin' Donuts is Dunkin' Donuts.

I hate that.

I hate that too.

And also, Dunkin' Donuts starred in Quincy, Massachusetts.

Yes.

Crumble cookies now crumble.

Crumble.

It was always Crumble.

But all of these Sean Parker.

Yeah.

And yeah, but they also like

Jumba Juice.

Jamba Juice is now Jamba.

That is actually what I was thinking about.

It was the Yogurts.

It was just Jamba.

It's that sort of thing of like, you don't need to, I don't need to like buy band-aids at Jamba Juice.

I don't need to have fucking dessert.

It doesn't make any sense.

I don't need this shit.

Why is Jamba Juice selling band-aids?

Why aren't you selling band-aids?

Did you get band-aids at Jamba Juice recently?

Because I'm worried.

I got a fucking acai bowl and a fucking band-aid.

Cold compress.

What the fuck's going on here?

I'm just saying, there's no, like, it's these, it's, it's chains trying to do more than they have to do.

Yeah, I agree.

Which, which little caesars actually is one that's like they they kind of do do the more of the basics but there but you know there's the wings and this like you just don't need to do that i think there's also any cheese bread you want you know what i mean i think there's also an element of like this is such a family meal and sometimes the kids want a dessert and so like they have this and brownies as well i just think they're they should be warmed up in the oven Yeah, you could just tell that they, they, these, this is a secondary thought for them, too.

And that's why it looks like this and tastes like this.

And that's why it's made in a factory kitchen and comes in plastic.

Yeah.

What the?

Make it in store.

I don't know.

Warm it up for me.

Can I say something about that?

Please.

I disagree.

I think it should be colder.

I think it should be much colder.

I think she actually took it out of the fridge or a freezer.

She took it from a cold area.

Interesting.

I think warming it up would make it

fall apart more.

I think the key is for it to be cold because that's what cookie dough is.

It might be like, you know, like a cookie ice ice cream cookie sandwich.

So, so is this a skill issue on our part?

Were we supposed to have eaten that right away?

And like, you know, while it was cold.

If it is supposed to be frozen, it's almost disturbing that it hasn't melted or anything that now that it's warm.

I'll also say that when I went to the location where I picked mine up, I saw these just sitting on the shelf.

They were just at room temp.

They weren't refrigerated.

But we'll give it to the honks.

We'll see what they think.

In between their salads.

Oh, another brown thing?

I saw one in in the toilet earlier.

And now I made one.

I can't go to the Christmas party tonight.

And they're not too stuffed between their salads, pizza, and injecting themselves with the substance.

That's why the hunks come in here every other week because

they are on the sales.

It's a big gnarled version of them back at their apartment.

The other version of them is making workout videos.

All right, we should get to our fork score.

So, Jono, here's how this will work.

We will each go around.

We will give a closing argument, if you will,

some final thoughts on Little Caesars, and then we'll end by giving it a fork score.

Now, here's what I'd like to propose to you, Mitch.

I think Jono should go last because I think I know where you and I are going to land.

And I'll just kick this thing off first.

I've said for, I'm now saying for the third time that this is the pizza of the working class.

I think there's, I still have the strongest argument.

You can maybe say Costco because Costco's pizza is so cheap, but also.

Costco working class?

This is a member of the class.

You have a membership.

That's the thing.

So it's more of a little bit more of a middle class thing.

I like how affordable Little Caesars is.

I love how

you can get like, you know, still you get a hot and ready.

I know it's not $5 anymore, but still just cheap and that can

be a working man's lunch or that can fill up a small family.

It brings the boom.

It brings the boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Five booms.

Do you not do it for me?

You're going to do it with me?

Oh, you want him to go, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Thank you.

Can I do one?

Yeah.

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Oh, shit.

That was cool as hell.

I like that you did that, and you have no idea what the fuck it is.

No clue.

It just seemed like a lot of fun.

And let me tell you something, it was.

Yeah, it's a fucking blast.

I like that it's affordable.

I think the quality of pizza in terms of what they do, I think their quality of pizza is quite high for the price point.

And I think you compare it to the sort of the big four, the Mount Rushmore of U.S.

pizza chains, Domino's, Pizza Hut, Little Caesars, and Papa John's.

It's my second favorite after Domino's.

And I like Domino's quite a bit.

Yeah.

I think Little Caesars deserves four and a half forks, and that's where I'm going to land.

Mitch, let's go to you.

Wise,

you steered me wrong on

Power Hour Eve on Thanksgiving Eve.

How so?

You told me to get the Brooklyn style pizza from Domino's.

Yeah, I like the Brooklyn style.

Pan pizza from Domino's is the way to go.

Wow.

The handmade hand-tossed pan.

Everyone on that text chain was wrong.

Everyone was wrong.

All right.

You're asking for our input.

We're saying what we like.

Everyone on that text chain was ordering Taco Bell.

Everyone did order Taco Bell.

So actually, everyone on that text chain was right.

I was the one who was wrong.

I shouldn't have ordered Domino's.

I

dominoes is probably,

we've said this before, people are like, Domino's is lousy pizza.

It's like, well, sometimes you're in the mood for Domino's.

It's true.

It's different from being in the mood for good pizza.

Sometimes I want North of Brooklyn type pizza.

Sometimes I want to go to Quarter Sheets Wags.

That's one of my favorite restaurants in LA.

You got to go.

You can come with me if you'd like.

I'd love to.

Wags is supposed to go.

He's never been.

I'd love to go.

You're not invited in our crew.

What are you talking about?

With us two?

I mean, first of all, you're not going to come.

I would come.

One night out with someone with friends.

I'd come.

All right, fine.

You're invited.

Wow, when are you going?

I don't know.

We'll figure it out.

We'll figure it out.

We'll figure it out.

Want to go tonight and skip the headgun party?

We'd have more fun.

Oh, hold on.

Hold on.

Okay.

I found this in the Power Hour text thread.

Is Handmade Pan or Brooklyn style better at Domino's?

This is Mitch.

I said, I like Brooklyn.

It gets a heart from After

drunk.

Everyone in this thread is actively drunk.

This is, I am up so late.

It's 10.57 p.m.

Mitch says, wow.

Gilly, our buddy Yelling to Seem, also a writer for Twisted Metal.

That's right.

We went to

Mimi.

Mimi's with, yep.

Season two coming soon to Peacock.

Says Brooklyn.

Emma says Brooklyn for sure.

Mitch, you ordered the Brooklyn.

I did.

You did.

Well, well, well, well.

I always get the fan feeds up.

You got a Doughboys to merit.

11.12 p.m., Mitch says, I usually go pan, but went with a consensus.

I pray you are all right.

Pray.

Mitch, I'm so sorry.

Drunk I'm alive.

11.49 p.m.

Betsy says, Betsy Sedaro, we just ate all caps so much Taco Bell.

And then Mitch replies, Domino's was so bad, I fucked up.

Which in reality, you guys fucked up.

No, I mean, it's still on you.

I can hear Mitch saying, fucked up.

Fucked up.

Just laying on my couch.

Not that, I wasn't that fucked up.

I drank about six to seven beers and had a couple shots of Jaeger Meister.

Oh, that'll do it.

This was, this was in an hour.

It was the power hour, but I felt pretty good.

I felt okay, too.

Oscar Montoya, by the way, also then just replied with a screenshot of Godzilla minus one.

Yeah.

He was sober, Oscar, and he was being hilarious.

Yeah.

Everyone was being hilarious.

It was a fun night.

Domino's is my number one place for like non-good

like chain pizza.

Chain pizza.

Like, yeah, and I mean, like, even people call it shitty.

I'm like, yeah, I still, but I still think I think highly of Domino's in many ways.

I love Lil Caesars, and I've like Domino's is like a five-forker for me.

This place, if you get the hits, if you get the extra most best is pizza,

it's in the golden play club for me.

And I'm honestly deciding whether it should be five forks.

And I think I'm going to, the CEO is a good man.

It's working class.

It's affordable.

It's hot and ready.

I wish there was more of a delivery component.

I mean, that's where Domino, but you know, this is their whole thing.

First off, you can get it delivered.

I think it's a new third-party service.

but part of how they're able to keep costs down is that they are not delivery focused.

They're pickup focused.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Which is good.

It's a good thing.

Which I like that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm going five forks.

Wow.

Five forks from the spoon, man.

Yeah.

All right, John.

I mean,

like, is this one of the chains you probably should root for?

I mean, they're all evil in a way, but the guy was the CEO, what's his name again?

I don't have it in front of me.

He's like, he was a, he's a good, it sounds like he was a good man.

I'm sure he had some problems, but yes, in general, among this class, among the class of Titans of industry who are you know versus someone like the who was the the piece of shit who ran andy puzzer the guy who ran carls jr parties there's there's some real pieces of shit papa john obviously uh in in that sector and so yeah it's it's it's uh compared to everyone else what i was gonna say is

i forgot um what were we

just talking we were just saying something else what was it a dominoes dominoes delivery oh a pickup delivery oh i was gonna say the about the marketing that that's another reason i feel like you're to root for little Little Caesar's Pizza Pizza.

Pizza Pizza.

It's a fun little guy.

Their advertising is pretty quirky.

I think their marketing is a lot of fun.

All right, Jono, it falls to you.

No pressure, because I honestly just want to.

The Noid is gone forever.

Well, he lives on with us with Kolik.

Is the Noid more fun than Little Caesar?

That feels like an episode.

It does a future episode.

You can come back for that if you'd like.

You know, I wonder if the noid made an appearance at our live show.

It's a big question.

I wonder.

I wonder.

People will know now.

They'll know now.

We don't have any ideas yet, so probably is my answer.

We asked John O, he says no.

We get, you know, little Caesar guy.

I'd be the little Caesar guy anytime.

It's so fun to say, pizza, pizza.

It's pretty damn good.

Look,

John O'S emotion capture suit doing the Little Caesar movie next week.

All right.

Look, Domino's, out of those four heavyweights, Domino's has got to be number one.

And I think it's far and away number one.

I think if you're kind of hungover or you're just having a lazy Sunday and you're watching football, Lil Caesars will do.

I also want to call it Lil Caesars for some reason.

I know, and it's not, it's not

Caesar.

It's a little Caesar's.

It's Lil Teensy Baby Caesar.

Pizza Pizza.

Here's my biggest problem with it is that there's like no sauce on anything.

I know they give you those big jugs, but it just, a lot of it to me just tasted like bread.

You know, there wasn't enough.

We like bread.

There wasn't enough flavor for me.

Like when you get the cheesy bread from Domino's, there's like some garlic sprinkles and some, there's some pop to it a little bit.

And I didn't get that with little Caesars.

Yeah, this is all cheesening.

It's not like seasoning.

It's all cheesing.

And I didn't get enough flavor.

Now,

I was originally going to say three and a half forks,

but I think you're right.

The marketing is really fun.

God bless Rosa Parks.

So I'm going to give it four and a half forks.

Four and a half forks.

Oh my God, a whole point.

Golden Plate Club

Caesars.

You have rejoined the elite and chained restaurants.

Now with a little small little golf clap there.

I will take a half a fork away if we find out that CEO is as bad as Mitch's great-grandfather thought he was.

I'm sure our listeners will tell us.

And then we'll get in trouble.

I've had the chronic what coals of Narnia in my head ever since you said lazy something.

Oh, yeah, that's so fun.

What a good bit.

Yeah.

A good fun song, wages.

Fun song.

Fun song.

Hey, that was our review of Little Caesars.

It's time for a segment.

I've got a food-related exam, and Mitch and Jono must compete for superiority.

It's slop quiz, and this is slop quiz, true or false, movie tie-in menu, or movie lion men know.

Oh,

I'll read the description.

Wait, did you, did you, did you do this, Amelia?

She did.

She looked very satisfied for a second.

I did not.

She sat back, put her hands behind her head, put a cigar in.

The title that Weigs came up with at the end, the tie-in men know.

Yeah,

the title I altered a little bit, but the game is all Amelia.

I'll read the description of a movie tie-in menu, and you tell me if it really existed or was made up by our menu.

You guys know the chronicle of Narnia, right?

The Leno Lazy Sunday.

Yes.

Yes.

So we put like old men singing Lazy Sunday at this point.

That made me feel fucking...

How old is that?

That'll be us under 15 years.

Yeah, it's like 15.

20 years old almost.

Yeah, that is.

2009, maybe?

Yeah.

I think even before that, maybe.

I think 2006, 2007.

Yikes.

Yeesh.

That is, that's getting up there.

Yeah.

That'll be us in a retirement home someday.

Singing the chronic walks of Narnia.

That was a good bit when I was young.

And Chris Barnell was older than most of the times.

Oh, okay.

Sure.

All right.

So I'll read the description.

Tell me if it's true, chew, or false.

False.

So if it was real or made up.

Okay.

Okay, great.

Okay.

First up.

True, chew, or false is just false still?

Yeah, I think so.

How about food?

Okay, chew or food.

All right, chew or food.

Okay.

Okay.

Number one.

And

you can interject at any time, but I advise you to let me read the entire prompt.

Okay.

Number one, IHOPS Grinch menu in 2018 featuring the following items.

Grinch's green pancakes, Whoville Holiday Cheesecake French Toast, Minty Who Hot Chocolate, and Who Roast Beast Omelette.

It's Chew.

It's Chew.

You both get it.

Yes, this is Chew.

All right, next up.

Easy one to start with.

Yeah, what's number one?

Sounds like things are going to get a little trickier.

No, I'm just saying, like, that's the way.

Yeah, that means

you win.

It's like, who wants a millionaire?

The first question is.

Who wants a millionaire?

Who wants a millionaire?

You know, we're at a bunch of millionaires.

You can choose them.

Auction them off to four people.

All right, next up: Baskin Robbins, Mitchell vs.

the Machines menu in 2021.

Rocky Road Trip, Rainbow Robot Orange Sherbert, and Pal Pistachio.

I'm going to say chew.

I'm going to say food.

John O gets it.

It is food or false.

There was no Mitchell vs.

the Machines menu from Baskin Robbins.

I didn't give a shit about that movie.

Hey, hey, hey.

It had my name in the fucking title.

I actually never in it.

I never got around to seeing Mitchell vs.

the Machines.

I heard it was good.

I heard it was a fun action.

I'm sure it was, but it was one of those that isn't like Disney, so nobody, or Pixar.

Right, it didn't have the lasting cultural footprint.

All right, next up.

Johno's up.

Fuck.

From John O to Johnny, Johnny Rockets Kong Skull Island menu in 2017, the Hickory Smoked Peppered Bacon Cheeseburger, the Rote 66 Mushroom Swiss burger, and Street Tots.

Chew.

Mitch says chew.

I'm going to say food.

Mitch takes it.

This one.

I knew this one.

You know this one, Mitch, because we had it on the podcast

with Eugene Cordero, who was in that movie.

It seems like there's a handicap going on.

There was a

well, this is the thing.

Mitch and I don't remember a lot of the episodes we've done.

I actually,

I actually didn't remember.

I actually didn't remember that we did it on the podcast, but I was like, but I was like, I feel like this is real.

Were those really,

those are really the items they called it the Root 66 Mushroom Swiss burger?

Yeah, I guess.

Because I remember they had like a Kong shake.

They had like a banana shake.

And they had like, but the actual, it feels like they didn't put any effort into

the Kong shake.

The banana shake.

That's nice, dude.

That's nice.

Yeah, that was fun.

Speaking of handicap, you know,

the last Christmas gift, my daddy gave me a set of golf clubs.

I really need to, you're a Lynx man.

Like we said, we didn't get into it too much.

I sidetracked it by yelling at you about being in a clubhouse.

I feel like, you know what, as a boy, like not a boy, but like when I was younger, the idea of like a Shirley temple and a golf club is a fancy family.

Oh, that's fantastic.

That's what you do the 19th hole when you were a boy.

I want to golf again.

I know you're a big golfer.

Well, do it anytime you want.

You're too good, though.

I need to go to like a short course.

Sure.

Just mess around.

It's all about the 19th hole anyway, right?

There you go.

You know what I'm talking about.

I do now.

Hey, Danny DeVito's teeing off in front of us.

This is a short course.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

Mitch is teeing off him because of his hog.

I get allowed in.

I have to show my hog.

You must be 6'3.

Oh, my God.

Get on the first team.

Throw the line.

I think I would have to go to the driving range and then take a couple of lessons, but I would like to golf.

It would be fun.

Or you could just go to the driving range.

Oh, there you go.

Oh, that would be a mess.

I would have to take a lesson and then go to the driving range.

And then we would go to the far right side so you don't shank it and hit anybody.

That's very smart.

Good job.

You know, once, speaking about the Celtics, when I was at that country club as a kid, I shanked a ball between Bob Koozi's legs.

Oh, my God.

Celtics legend.

He turned around and he really stared me down in a pretty angry way.

Wow.

That's intense.

And I just stood there frozen.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's terrifying.

That's like amazing.

I worked at a golf club

after I was a garbage man one summer.

And the next two summers, I worked at a golf club.

Yeah.

Much better.

Yeah.

And

I saw Walter McCarty there.

Oh, really?

I love Walter.

Wait,

I just want to recap.

I think you've got two.

All even.

It's all even.

Yes.

So you go to the Grinch menu

and we're split on the Mitchell Machines and the Kong Skull Island.

Okay, next up.

Number four.

Howard Johnson's 2001 A Space Odyssey Kids Menu in 1968.

This included the Happy Clown, which is a spaghetti with Italian-style tomato sauce dish, a Jack Horner, which was a PBJ sandwich, ice cream, sherbet, and or jello, and Tommy Tucker, sliced roast turkey, potato, vegetable, roll, and butter, and a Little Boy Blue, grilled hamburger, patty, and potato.

Was this chew or food?

This is so much stuff that I'm like, did you guys really make this up?

And my answer is no.

Yes, you did.

Food.

I agree.

I say food.

This was real.

There was a Howard Johnson's 2001 Space Odyssey Kids menu.

How did you find that?

Too much specifics.

I googled like old tie-in menus and that was one that showed up.

I'm surprised.

This is crazy.

This again, unless I'm missing something, and I've seen 2001 a number of times, I don't know what the connection of the menu names is to...

The

Jack Horner, like a character in the menu.

It doesn't seem like they are that related.

So Howard Johnson's is that doesn't exist anymore, right?

No, I think there might be one like

hotels.

It's a hotel chain that has yeah, it's a hotel chain and then had three restaurants.

Yeah, yeah, because you know where it started?

Lindsay Massachusetts.

That's right.

As well as Duncan.

They had this comic book and then it had a menu on it and it was called like the 2001 Space Odyssey kids menu.

And then at the bottom of the comic book, it had these

items with the how much it cost.

Wow.

So

I don't know how it relates to 2001, but

it was there.

Your great-grandpa Hal from the movie.

All right, next up, it's still 2-2.

Cracker.

By the way, I just want to give a shout out.

The North Quincy won the Thanksgiving Day game against Quincy High.

Your old high school.

My old high school.

There you go.

They were the number one play in Sports Center's top 10 on

Thanksgiving night.

What was the play?

This quarterback, who I guess the quarterback's really good.

I wish I could remember his name because I would give him a shout-out.

I think

Giamba or something.

Jamba Juice.

I think he just goes by Jamba now.

Jamba now.

You don't need to lower his social status at school by mentioning him on the Don't Goes podcast.

Let him be the quarterback hunk.

Yeah, never a good thing to.

Yeah, yeah.

It was never a good thing when you were social yourself with me at North Quincy.

But he like scrambled in the last minute of the game and like threw a Hail Mary, and the kid caught it in the end zone and like tied up, and then they went on to win.

Wow.

Wow.

Next up, Ming.

All right.

Cracker Barrel's Hillbilly Elegy menu in 2020.

Mama's chicken casserole, JD's homemade ham and cranberry sauce, and country pumpkin soup is this true or false true or food.

Food, food.

You say food, Mitch.

Can you say it again?

I'm looking at the play.

It's pretty fucking good.

You were a good fool.

You're just watching the play.

You're not looking for the name to shout him out.

The play is fucking good.

I did.

I got

a senior quarterback.

The balloons are up.

What is everyone pointing at?

The TV had an ad-up for Matlock.

Meets Indiana Jones.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, Indiana Jones.

His name is senior senior quarterback Mike Gallagher.

So

Mike Gallagher.

You're right there with Giamba.

Where the fuck did that come from?

You knew what G was in there.

I wish I could find the name of the wide receiver who caught it too, because that was pretty impressive.

Anyways,

big waste of time there.

Did you say this Hillbilly elegy thing is true or false?

Cracker Barrel's Hillbilly Elegy menu in 2020.

I don't even have to hear anybody.

Yes, you both get a point.

This one was made up by Amelia.

Thank you, Jono.

No problem.

Yeah, thank you, Jono.

All right, two left.

Number six, Wendy's Harry Potter menu back in 2005, the Tri-Wizard Triple Stack, Hogwarts Lemon Pepper, Onion Rings, and Dumbledore's Army of Fries.

I was finishing the play again, but can you just repeat it one last time?

Wendy's Harry Potter menu back in 2005, Tri-Wizard Triple Stack, Hogwarts Lemon Pepper Onion Rings, Dumbledore's Army of Fries.

Food.

I'm going to say

Chew.

Mitch Mitch takes it.

Damn it.

Here's what I would have sniffed this one out because Wendy's baby.

Wendy's is not going to do it.

Yeah, and they're not going to do it.

Well, they did just do the Spongebob thing, but that was a little out of character.

Wendy's is changing.

But they also.

It's not good.

Lemon pepper onion rings is too early in 2000.

Yeah, I wouldn't have gotten there.

Finally.

Steve-O texted me the other day, Wags,

and was like, I just had a spicy chicken sandwich from Wendy's.

Yeah.

It's bad.

It was bad.

Wendy's used to be my favorite.

Wendy's is gone.

Wendy's is lost.

Wendy's gone.

This is another episode.

We'll figure out what's up with Wendy's.

They got to change.

I say this in a pleasant way.

The CEOs need to be tossed out.

Right.

I'm saying that.

I'm saying that in the

very clearly,

I do not condone violence in any way.

You know this about me.

I don't like anything.

The CEO should leave peacefully.

The CEO should leave peacefully.

Peaceful transfer of power, handed over to new leadership.

Yes.

Not tossed out a window.

Finally, this is, and let's see, it's Mitch has four, Jono has three.

This is the final one.

This will be determinative.

This is worth two points, so your kids still get it.

Oh, it's worth two points.

Okay, here we go.

Why not?

Five.

Why is there a tiebreaker?

No.

This one's worth two points.

Okay, this one's worth two points.

Five guys Fantastic Four menu back in 2015.

The Human Torch Burger, Fantastic Five Guys Cheese Fries, and Invisible Woman Cookies and Cream Milkshake.

Okay, this is food.

Absolutely food.

So you

get two points and Mitch wins.

Let's call it a tie.

We'll call it a tie.

Tie goes to the guests.

All right, fine.

I'm North Quincy.

You're Quincy.

You're wearing Quincy colors.

Blue and white is the Quincy colors.

Oh, how about that?

Wait, where are the North Quincy colors?

Black and red.

Wow.

Knock them dead.

Classic rivalry.

Black and red versus blue and white.

That's right.

I will say that one was a little tricky because there was a fantastic four menu, Mitch, that we had on the podcast, but it was was at Denny's.

That's right.

I do.

I feel like I've never heard of Five Guys.

Five Guys does not do that shit.

No, they absolutely do not do that.

The Thing Burger.

I remember that.

The Thing Burger.

Thing Burger was good.

The Invisible Woman one had Invisible Woman's syrup.

It was the clear syrup, just kind of Peter North onto the top of the stack of pancakes.

Vaguely sexual.

Peter North onto the

way from Canada, porn star.

My neurologist is calling.

Do you need to answer it?

I mean, yeah, but it's fine.

Okay, well, we'll get, we're almost at the finish line here.

Just like a restaurant buyer feedback, let's open up with the feedback.

Today's email is from Jerry from Kingston, Pennsylvania.

Jerry writes, Hi, Doe family, a long, long time listener.

I've been listening and watching videos of rug cleaning and lawnmowers, weed whackers, to help me fall asleep.

It got me thinking, what would be some good food sounds, food prep sounds that would be good listening.

First thought, maybe the patented chilies fajita sounds.

Good pitch.

I thought of sounds of a fast food or diner kitchen.

Have a few more ideas, but would be interested in hearing your thoughts.

Shout out to Emma and Jemmy taking the time out a year ago to respond to a message during a difficult time.

I appreciate you all.

It was nice of you.

All right, let's.

Jemmy's not here, by the way, because of the holiday party.

Yeah, Jemmy's not a party animal.

She's more of an introvert.

Yeah, so if you're like, there's no Jemmy here today, what's going on with my episode?

Where's Jemmy?

Blame the hunks.

They want to have a big party, and so we couldn't bring Jemmy in here because she couldn't handle all the commotion.

That's bullshit.

Wait, so what does he want the sounds for?

He wants to know what's a good sound to fall asleep to a food sound

the fajitas i mean that's a great answer is kind of his own question yeah like how about like when you get a good pour from a soda fountain oh that's pretty

powerful stream honestly even just like a

oh yeah that's really good dude this is an asmr podcast

what about just like come back toe boys

what about like salt shakers

that's gonna be so annoying you're gonna hate that mitch is tapping into the microphone

you have to do it like this the fuck he's pretty good at it this is really nice

he's really fucking good

at it i'm really being very good at this right now

he's really he's really doing a good job

that's salt and vinegar what vinegar

how about vinegar i like salt and you know what maybe maybe maybe uh i love salt and vinegar chips me too too.

Lays great salt and vinegar chips, maybe, yeah.

Maybe

I think you're saying like a salt shaker or like an oregano shaker with a little bit more.

Yeah, some of that would be good.

How about a like when you get whipped cream out of a can, you get that?

That's pretty good.

That's good, that's good.

How about this one?

Uh, a big fat Italian guy, pizza's up.

That's fun.

Let me fill out my voting ballot.

Trump, there we go.

I just don't know what she stands for.

Anyway, time to

stir the marinara.

I don't know.

I can talk there for a second.

What else?

What else?

What's up with your people, Amelia?

I will say, Michael Imperioli from The Sopranos is very vocally anti-Trump.

That's true.

We love Google.

We love Imperioli.

He's great.

He's not really Italian.

Not anymore.

Any food sounds over there at the dais?

Any food sounds y'all like?

I can't think of food sounds, but I always like the sound of like...

like when I was a kid and you were like homesick and I could hear my dad making dinner in the kitchen and I was just like kind of asleep on the couch, just like background noise.

Sizzling and simmering.

But like kind of far away, not necessarily right here.

no that's making me think of like boiling water yeah boiling water boiling water is good that's good

like a simmering cauldron how about potatoes getting boiled this is we this is our territory potatoes getting boiled stirring a pot of mac and cheese i don't know if that's something you want with a wooden spoon yes yes yeah important that's huge i used to hate when ugh i shouldn't even talk about it don't even you know what i'm gonna say i know what you're gonna say People biting their forks.

Oh, yeah, that's bad.

That's rough.

I don't like rough stuff.

I don't like that.

You don't like it either.

It makes my teeth hurt.

I know that's why we're boys.

Yep.

My sister and I.

I kind of like it

um my my dad would do it my sister and i used to hate it uh oh yeah my brother does that he like bites the flesh before he pulls it out of his mouth and makes my spine tingle

it's like you see i just see casey wincing it's really it's a it's just it's a funny thing it's funny everyone here hates it because there's so many people that just used to do it and i was like why are you doing it doing that who taught you that yeah some people like inflicting pain on others my dad wouldn't my dad would do it like accidentally sometimes but still yeah sure uh how about this for sauna That's the person who just took the mic screen off and was tip-tap in the mouth.

Those people are annoying.

Anyways,

how about breakfast being made?

Like crack of an egg, throw it into a hot pan, you know?

You're so much fun.

Yeah, onions hitting a hob.

Yeah, that's good.

Ooh, that's good.

I think Mitch has another one.

Yeah, how about this one?

Tasty.

That would be great if you want nightmares.

Who is that?

Who's that guy?

Some guy who just had something really tasty.

Tasty.

Time to fill out my ballot.

So the little Caesar's guy.

Yeah.

Pizza, pizza.

Damn good.

He's an RFK guy.

Oh, God.

Dude, the little Caesar guy?

Yeah, yeah.

Why is Lil Caesar an RFK guy?

I don't know.

I just decided.

Not after making those cookie crumble things.

That's true.

That's actually very anti-RFK.

Yeah, that's anti-RFFK.

You actually.

Yeah, we need Casey to do it.

I don't agree with that.

That's pretty good.

That is pretty good.

The way that

I don't like how small he is and how he says

Tapiza.

Johno is good.

Jono is an impressionist.

I don't know if you know this.

I can pick it up on it.

It's pretty obvious.

I've got two impressions.

You do a great Trump, and you do Tom Hanks too, don't you?

You do Tom Hanks too.

Yeah.

We won't pimp you, as they say, the word that's been not not used any longer, and I still continue to say it.

Yeah, all right.

I'll do Tom Hanks real quick.

I'll be honest with you.

I love little Caesars.

It's so good.

Wow, that was good.

Just give it five out of five fours.

Wow.

That's pretty damn good.

I told he's the man.

And you don't get to hang with him as much as I do.

We're going to go to probably quarter sheets alone.

You're not.

I might take along.

Yeah.

If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at feedback at birdfuck.com or leave us a voicemail at 830-goto.

That's 830-463-6844.

And hey, to get the Doughboys double our weekly bonus episode, plus our entire pre-2018 back catalog, subscribe at patreon.com slash Doughboys.

Our producers, Emma Erdbrink, our associate producers, Amelia Marino.

Our engineer is Casey Donahue, and our video editor is Mike Dorfman.

Our guest today, Jono Wilson.

What a treat.

Please come back.

What if we did Top Golf?

That would be fun.

They got food there.

Now that I love.

All right.

And guess what?

We'll make that happen.

He ain't coming, Koozie.

Sorry, Koozie.

He ain't invited.

You ain't invited.

Sorry, Koozie.

It's not for you.

It's not for you.

Yeah, you're going to give us, you're going to give my boy the stink eye.

You're not invited.

You're not coming.

You're not coming.

I hope he doesn't die

after this record, before the episode comes for you.

Yeah, that would be unfortunate.

Bad diamond.

Next episode, it's another bad week for CEOs and Bob Koozie.

Jono Wilson, Twisted Metal Season 2 is coming soon.

Wendy CEO has been thrown out the window by Mike Mitchell.

Twisted Metal Season 2 is coming soon to Peacock.

Do we know?

Is it 2025?

Do we know a date yet?

They haven't told us a date.

And I can't even guess the date.

But that will all be figured out.

Look for it real soon.

2025.

If you're not subscribed to Peacock, sign up for it.

Support Mitch, support John O.

John.

Anything else you want to plug?

I'll say this.

Oh, God.

I don't even know what you're doing.

We have a lot of fun together this season.

You have scenes that I know that you're both involved in, which people are going to really have a strong take on.

I'm not saying this super vague, like trying to say this super vaguely, but yeah.

Let's just say that people are going to react to it.

They're going to burn out their

DVR.

I don't even know what to say now.

They're going to burn out their

fire stick.

Their fire stick.

Look, there's some stuff.

Yeah.

Fuck, I shouldn't have said anything.

Do you want to just take it again?

Look, there's some stuff that will get people horny.

Yeah, I would agree with that.

People are definitely going to react to it.

Jono, anything else you want to plug beyond Twist Metal?

Nah, nothing.

There you go.

And hey, that'll do it for this episode of Dough Boys, the first episode of 2025.

Until next time, for this moon, man, Mike Mitchell, I'm McGuire.

Happy eating.

See ya.

Hey, buddy, just something, some breaking chews here we want to add on to the end of this.

I saw a text from Casey that was sent earlier that we didn't get to in the meat meat of the episode, but it is very relevant, pertinent to long names.

Big names.

Big names.

Casey says, Big name, Colin, Dekembe Mutombo, Mopolando Mukamba, Jean-Jacques Walmutombo.

The full name of Dekembe Mutombo, the NBA Center RIP.

Whoa.

That's a long one.

Georgetown guy.

Georgetown guy.

That's right.

Rest in peace, Dekembe, too.

Rest in peace.

Great career.

Great career.

And I think one last thing I can say is: who wants to sex the spoon man?

So people may not understand that's a reference to

a thing that

reference a thing that Mutumbo famously said one night when he went into

a bar in Georgetown.

He said, Who wants to sex Mutumbo?

So, that's what Mitch was referencing.

That's amazing.

We're gonna get a bunch of DMs that are.

I want to sex Mutumbo.

I said, The Spoon Man, damn it.

Hey, buddy, want Doughboys merch?

We're talking hats, shirts, sweatshirts, patches, glasses, all sorts of stuff, aprons.

It's all available at kinshipgoods.com/slash Doughboys.

That's kinshipgoods.com/slash Doughboys.

Sources for the intro are in the episode description.

That was a hit gum podcast.