Blue Bottle with Kate Berlant

This is a head gum podcast.

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Check it out on our YouTube channel at youtube.com/slash Doughboys Media.

None of them were real marriages, they were legalized affairs.

In those days, you couldn't get a lease on an apartment if you were living in sin.

This was Arthur Arshowski, who achieved worldwide fame as clarinetist and band leader Artie Shaw.

Exploding onto the jazz scene in the 1930s, Shaw was an innovative virtuoso but a difficult collaborator, the latter quality transposed onto his eight marriages and myriad affairs with some of the most famous starlets of the era.

Among his octet of spouses were actresses Lana Turner, Evelyn Keys, Doris Dowling, and Ava Gardner, who famously trumpeted later partner Frank Sinatra's clarinet-sized hog.

Shaw also had confirmed or rumored relationships with Joan Crawford, Judy Garland, Betty Grable, Rita Hayworth, and Lena Horn.

Such was the cultural preeminence of jazz music in the first half of the 20th century that a professional clarinetist could earn a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and become the nation's preeminent poon hound.

But in our time, even a gainfully employed reedsmith who performs regular gigs may struggle to pay the bills.

Such was the case with Oakland clarinetist James Freeman, who found his hobby of home coffee roasting to prove more lucrative than his woodwind concerts.

In January 2004, Freeman opened a coffee cart in San Francisco, which became a Bay Area hotspot, and a brick-and-mortar soon followed, as well as a rush of investor money from TechBro fanboys.

The store expanded into a chain and became a favorite of Yoga Mat-carrying coastal elites.

In 2015, a newly opened Tokyo location reportedly drew four-hour lines.

In 2017, the upscale coffee concept was acquired for a staggering $700 million by Nestle, a glossy sheen over the company's outrageous practice of thieving drinking water from indigenous communities and then bottling it in non-recyclable plastic.

Today, the original American art form of jazz is viewed as quaint or pretentious, employed as background music on the Weather Channel, or used as shorthand to portray a movie character as sophisticated.

It feels bizarre that there was ever a time when the so-called king of the clarinet could get more pussy than Derek Jeter.

And Freeman's own path from clarinet player to coffee mogul perhaps also shows that our soul-sick society has shifted its chief aspiration not from artistic achievement or romantic partnerships, but sheer accumulation of wealth.

This week on Dough Boys, Blue Bottle Coffee.

Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants.

I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host

Texter, parody of Dexter, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

Like, I text a lot.

Like, you text a lot, like, you're on your phone.

All right.

Mitch, I'm using that one because it's from Alex Browser, P.S.

I was an intern on the Birthday Boys season two.

I love you and Mitch You, Mitch.

And then an Alexander.

And also, it was kind of a nice, it was a nicer roast.

It was a nicer roast.

It wasn't cruel.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It wasn't a Brady roast level roast.

It wasn't.

We all remember the Brady.

We all remember the Brady roast from six months ago at this point.

Alex included an asterisk on intern, unpaid intern, roast at birdfuck.com.

Yeah, do better IFC.

Mitch, Toronto Dough is over.

We're back in the studio here in November.

Toronto is over.

We're over.

And you know what else is over?

You came up to Toronto twice this summer.

That's right.

We had a great time.

I think we probably did it all in one.

We did all in one.

And also, everyone came.

It was fun.

The other thing is that we are on the other side of what has dominated the discourse for this calendar year, the 2024 presidential election.

So how about that?

It's November?

It's November, Mitch.

Congrats.

Congrats, President Trump.

I just have to guess.

Mitch, we'll just, I'll cover our bases.

Congrats, President Robert F.

Kennedy Jr.

All right, I think we're covered.

Yeah, we're covered.

we're good those are two options

what a time we've been banking these episodes recording these in advance for a number of reasons but uh well for one reason but the

today it feels cartoonish yes we are too far we've gotten to the point where it's too far we're past the event horizon yeah it's november

it's a super hot day in june and this episode's coming out in november a great day to have uh an actual funny guest on our show yes i've been remaining silent i don't even know the well i'm just saying you're normally after just listening.

Now I'm here.

I'm going too early.

No, you're doing it.

It's really act out of respect to wait till we brought out on stage.

Normally, our guests are, how do you put this?

Duds.

The stinkers.

What do you, how do you, what would you say, Wags?

Yeah, I don't know.

I would say some people might characterize them as the bottom of the barrel.

Yeah.

But we're very, very excited to have our guest here today.

But before we do that, Mitch, you have a drop you have to do.

I do.

Emma, would you hit us with a drop, please?

You know who I like, and I always forget the characters' names, because there's Jar Jar, and then there's Boss Nass, but then there's like that third gungan.

I just, I can't, I want to interject.

Okay,

I willingly, I

willingly smoked crack one time

and then I smoked it how long ago was this is before the Clone Wars.

That's not the real thing.

And then

I was really fucked up and I was with friends

and and and and and and and and and and and I smoke crack and I fucked up gungan I smoke rack

gungan I smoke rack

Sun was up I was all fucked up in my gay fork gungan

I smoke

gungan I smoke rack

Sun was up I was all fucked up here my gay fork gungan

That was fun that was fun that was a wild ride we didn't get closure on pick him by the way, but it was a good it was a good beat I like that drop we didn't get closure on who the gungan was the mystery third gungan.

Captain Tarpals is the character.

Oh, we're the only one who's been wondering who that was.

No,

you just knew it.

Yeah, yeah, I mean, I knew who it was.

Alex, by the way, who wrote into you, I just want to say hello.

Speaking of crack, I feel like I feel cracked out.

Oh, boy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I feel cracked out.

I got back from Vegas last night.

That's right.

And my flight was delayed, and I got home, and my AC was not working wise.

so i i

i had to go i went downstairs and i i slept downstairs it was cooler downstairs and uh i barely slept and then i drank coffee and now i'm wired yeah um

but i had a nice trip to vegas that's fun speaking of trump stayed at the trump tower in vegas it was very nice um

uh no i stayed at the wind a much nicer man yes um

and uh yeah i'm i feel a little out of my i don't drink coffee So you're not, no, you get very jittery from the cafe.

I'm very, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I'm, yeah, you're not on great sleep.

You don't have AC at home.

We didn't get good sleep.

No, you know, yeah, yeah.

So, I said,

we have a second episode after today.

And I was like, we should push that episode.

And you're like, we'll get through it.

And I'm just like, it's going to be great.

What do you mean it's going to be great?

How about we just don't do it?

We could, whatever.

We're in November.

We have to.

You just talked about.

We have to do it over the next 10 days.

That's the window we have to get all the records done.

It's going to be fine.

We can't do it tomorrow because there's a live stream.

Shut up.

Hello, Nick, Spoonmaster, Mitch, Emmer, Amelia, Casey, and Dropkin.

First time submitting a drop, but I was overcome with inspiration after the many revelations in the Milk Bar episode with Lisa Gilroy.

I hope this brings you as much joy as you've given me.

Is that a threat?

Love little Danny.

Am I gay for Gungan was the drop.

Thank you.

Yeah, a lot of fun.

Drops at birdfuck.com.

Mitch just dropped his phone.

You covered it well.

You're right.

You all right?

Yeah, I just, yeah.

You're all right.

Yeah, I'm fine.

I said it as a question.

I should have said it as a statement.

You're all right.

Yeah, I'm all right.

You're all right.

I also, when I launched, when I was like 20 years old, someone told me something was crack and I smoked it willingly, but it wasn't crack.

It was just weed.

They were fucking with me.

Right.

But I willingly did it.

And then I didn't even get to smoke crack.

And I never have,

to be clear.

You don't need to tick that one off it was offered to you.

You don't need to take that one off your bucket list.

I think you're good with a lifetime without crack.

Are you sure you didn't smoke it this morning?

I feel rich.

I feel crazy.

Vegas is very hot.

I saw Dead and Company

at the Sphere.

You know the company is.

Who's that?

John Mayer.

It is true.

Pretty cool, huh?

They love him, too.

They love deadheads.

The deadheads love them.

Deadheads love them.

They're like, yeah, Johnny Boy.

They were like cheering for John Mayer.

He's been very accepted by

the dead.

I don't know.

My understanding.

The deadheads.

And my understanding is that John Mayer fans have also

come to enjoy the deadheads.

So it's this nice bit of.

It's a nice little synergy.

I'm dealing with my own thing, Mitch, which is that I accidentally had almond milk before the record.

And as you know, we have developed this late-in-life nut tolerance, nut intolerance, rather.

I wish it was a tolerance.

So.

Hey, can you tolerate me?

I'm acting like a nut over here.

I'm still remaining completely sad

a lot.

Because there's been a couple of things I almost said, and then I shut myself down.

We should get you.

A first-time guest from her special Cinnamon in the Wind, which you can watch on Hulu Cape Berland is here.

Hi, Kate.

Hi.

Thanks for having me.

Thank you so much for being here.

You're, like I said, what a great guest.

What a great guest.

What a guest.

Thrilled, thrilled to be here.

My anxiety level very high.

And I don't usually get anxious anymore, but the coffee.

Coffee's probably.

That's all it will.

That will do that for me.

But you don't abstain from caffeine.

You're a caffeinated guy, but you just usually get it in lower doses.

Get it from like a soda pop.

I drink like, I drink, I've been trying not to, but I drink a Diet Coke a day.

So I've been doing like more iced teas and stuff like that.

Or these guys, spin drifts.

I do a lot of spin drifts.

But how much of the blue bottle did you have?

I did like, well, I got two coffees and I drank.

And your shaking.

Your hand is shaking.

Is it really?

That is.

Yeah, you're trembling.

Yeah, yeah.

Whoa.

Yeah,

let's switch you to water.

I'm going to drink the water.

You got to get two ID gummies if you need them.

Is it weed?

It's not weed.

It's not weed.

It's like flowers.

Like that.

All right.

Maybe I'll have one of those.

You have them here?

Yeah.

All all right.

Yeah,

I'll take one, please.

Emma, actually give him a crack.

Oh, you know, me with my bags full of crack.

I will say this: there was someone who I told you who it was before, and I won't say who it was, but they were like, You want like a gummy at the dead show?

I was like, Oh, what is it?

And they were like, It's mushroom.

It's like mushrooms.

Yeah, and Molly.

I was like, Mushroom and Molly gummy.

That's my combo.

Do I take two of these?

Yeah, you can.

They're not gummy.

Like, you can't chew them easily.

They're hard to chew through.

Okay.

That's nice.

It's on purpose.

It's going to calm you down.

It's going to go straight.

You're going to be fine.

Kate, you're from L.A.

I am.

Okay, so I'm also from Southern California.

I've lived in L.A.

County my entire life.

Do you have any food favorites out there?

L.A.

County.

Yeah, right?

What a spot.

Do you have any food favorites in L.A.?

Oh my God, of course.

I actually was going on a bit of a tangent, not a tangent, but I've, you know, I love to travel.

Sure, I lived in New York for almost 10 years.

And

LA has the best food in the world.

Wow, I love this take.

Actually, in the world.

And by the way, I know people are hearing this are going, I don't like her, right?

I can hear that.

I can feel that.

And it's a little bit, but I, everywhere else is

unlivable.

Like, I just,

and I, again, love.

There are other cities I love.

Unlivable.

I agree with that.

Yeah, I agree.

Here in Quincy Mass, I think, are kind of the two for me.

The two livable cities.

You just suddenly, yeah.

So, yeah.

The one thing I think that LA has in its favor is the breadth of options.

You can get like everything here.

Yeah, you really can.

And like a lot of my, and of course, my palate became accustomed to it because it's what's out here.

But like, you know, I got, I, I love, uh, you know, I love Mexican food.

I love Salvadoran food.

I love Japanese food.

You know, like, and all this stuff is an abundance.

Oh, yeah.

Korean food.

Yeah, well,

it is the most diverse city in America.

Last I checked.

Okay,

it's good, but it was that recently.

Yeah, I think you're right.

I think it's still it.

I think it is.

Yeah.

Look, people will get mad, but we have a lot of nerds listening.

Everyone going, this bitch everywhere else is unlivable.

Relax.

Like, I do mean that.

Yes.

But I also don't.

And I reserve the right to

abandon everything I say and also to believe it.

What's number two for what's after LA?

New York.

Yeah.

And they've always been, you know, people go, oh, you've seen New York because you're a New Yorker, which I love.

And I do identify, I mean, both.

I mean, New York is, you know, I always was kind of like, New York's better.

And now I'm doubling down on L.A.

Right.

You're with this guy.

I'm, hey, I love it out here.

Yeah.

It's great.

Do you have, okay, so like, go ahead.

I haven't answered your question.

Oh, no, that's all right.

Is it?

Yeah.

Okay, wait.

So, so here, so by the way, I'm seeing myself.

I'm zooming out.

Here I am.

LA is the best food, the most diverse culinary scene in America.

Gun to my head.

Can't tell you five restaurants.

Like all of a sudden, I'm completely blank.

You need to back it up.

I know, I know.

I'm going to speak for the people here.

You need to back it up.

So favorite, you're saying favorite restaurants.

Well, yeah, but we can also like, like, I mean, I think a lot of people have, you know, when they think of LA, they think of like In-N-Out Burger.

They think of Fat Burger.

You know, they think of some of these, these local chains.

I mean,

any of those you have any affinity for?

I do love In-N-Out, I have to say.

I'm a huge, I'm a burger head.

Nice.

I had a great just up the street at For the Wind last night.

Oh, yeah.

I've been singing for the winds.

Burger She Wrote.

Oh, Burger She Wrote.

Yeah.

I don't know if I love the name of it.

I hate the name.

Yeah.

Burgers Never Say Die.

Also, a really hard name.

I think they're falling off.

I don't even want to say it.

This is where I get hard.

I don't want to disparage businesses.

No, of course.

Of course.

And everyone, you know, the guy who...

who made it is from my hometown.

I love them.

And I, let's see, and cuts, cuts, cuts, cuts, cuts, cuts, cuts.

No, no, no, no, no.

No.

It's scary.

It's scary.

No, we are, we are, we are,

this is, we're, we're honest on this show.

Yeah, incredible sushi joint that's actually right across the street, Santo.

Sushi, have you been there?

I have not been there.

So there's a location in Mexico City in here, open for lunch.

I repeat, open for lunch.

Okay.

We have a huge lunch deficit post-COVID.

I agree with that.

Yeah, it's true.

Lunch and late night options.

Oh, it's devastating.

You can only go to horses late night.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They'll serve till one.

Do they really serve till one?

1 a.m.

You get there 12.45.

You can order a full steak.

I haven't done it, but isn't horses the place where the guy was like jacking off in there?

I know, but I think he's gone now.

We just have to move on.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So he just puts it.

Don't punish the staff.

Right.

Sounds like there's room for someone to move in.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm very pro.

Yeah.

That Weinstein injection thing.

Oh, we didn't say that on the pod, did we?

That was that was pre-pod.

Call back to something you said before.

Call back to pre-show.

Look,

I'm chilling out now.

You're next to Jemmy.

Jemmy's the pet Jemmy.

That'll calm you down.

That'll anchor you in the moment.

I'm a deadhead now, man.

And these gummies are calming me down.

I was on the floor with the people, not like Seth Rogan up in the fucking box.

All right, man.

I was fucking down on the floor

with the people, the deadheads.

That's cool.

I was in it, man.

That's cool.

You saw Seth Rogan there.

I didn't see him.

He was up in a box.

Okay.

I didn't even know he was there.

Are you just assuming?

No, I knew he was there.

How did you know?

Yeah, because I got fucking inside shit.

So now you're trying to be the man of the people, but you're saying you have an inside connection that told you to be able to do that.

who are in the world.

I'm the man of the people.

I'm the man of the people.

But I got the inside, I'm like, I'm like a day walker.

I could tell the people, like,

I walk with the elite, but then I tell this news to the people.

So you're a fraud.

Yeah.

Okay.

So

burgers are like, are burgers a favorite food of yours?

Yes.

Yeah.

Where does that rank?

Like, because Maria's, it's like fried chicken, but I am, like, that's my number one.

But I am the burger boy.

I think burgers are somewhere in like top five, you know?

Cheeseburger for me is like top three.

I really like want that a lot.

What do you really like love?

Like foods you love, love.

Like, what else are the top three?

I mean, I love, I'm very, you know,

start.

Okay, now it's just shocking because it's technically November,

but it's hot dog season where I'm sitting right now.

I won't break the

continuum that it starts to heat up.

I want a hot dog.

I'm very, like, I love, yeah, I love a cheeseburger pizza.

I mean,

a cheeseburger pizza.

Cheeseburger, comma pizza.

Yeah, sure.

Kama hot dog.

Yeah.

I love all that.

Hot fudge Sunday, I love fudge Sunday.

So hot fudge Sunday is great.

Yeah, yeah.

I had a nice steak dinner.

Where'd you go?

SW, the,

at the wind.

Oh, got it, got it, got it.

I had a nice, I got a massage.

Bun.

Whoa.

Uh, it was, it was nice.

Yeah.

I was, I was very nervous.

I was like,

getting a massage is hell on earth.

It is, it is, it's really, I don't like being touched in general, and that's like a real, I've tried to do it because I have a real, I have like a really bad back, especially.

I had an L5S one bulge in this piss for a while so you talked to john early about this i did yeah yeah yeah but um we we uh like so like just dealing with that i was just making sure i had my back pad here because it was because i'm thinking back um the

like like like so i went to massage for you know therapeutic reasons and it's still it was just like very like tough for me i get massages it but it's it's hell i'm constantly monitoring their experience i feel like who the hell do i think i am yeah coming in here my stomach started to like rumble, or like, I didn't know if I was gassy.

This is embarrassing to say.

But I was just like, I don't want her to be terrifying.

I don't, like, when she was touching my stomach, also,

I was like nervous when I got in there.

And I was like, am I supposed to be nude or whatever?

And then she was like, you can.

And then I was like, should I put, should I wear my underwear?

And she was just like, this fucking thing.

You're on your own.

Yeah.

Yeah.

She was like, you can.

And then just get on the cover.

So I did.

I went down nude, but it did.

Wow.

Okay.

I know.

It caused me to.

You've never done that.

It was, I was so stressed out.

Even I've never gone, I think maybe I've gone total nude, but even that for me feels

nothing about it.

I've never done well.

The reason I did is because you're under a blanket.

Sure.

And then, but there is a point where she lifts up the blanket and she's like, and they turn the head, a modesty turn.

She's like, she lifts the blanket up and she's like, turn over.

And I was so nervous to turn over.

Like, it was very, I was very nervous.

Were you engorged?

No.

Okay.

I had it.

In fact, the opposite.

I got it.

Like, the table was heated and it was still,

it was still.

Still had an innie.

It was an innie.

Yeah.

It was the Weinstein thing, basically, we were talking about.

I was like, I was,

the table was like hot.

Let's just clarify, the Weinstein thing we were talking about.

Oh, yes.

Is that he has no dick.

Yes, yeah.

Or to be fair, it's hamburger part.

It's hamburger.

Yeah, it looks like hamburger.

It's described in some really disgusting ways.

Yeah.

I was, I was, it was an innie, and I think she turned the table up the full, all the way up, basically.

And I still, I don't know how craft that freak, I don't know how people are like, I don't know how

people get into it in that way.

It's, it's, it's, it is crazy to me, but it was a very nice massage.

It was, it was very helpful.

My back had been hurting me and, and, and she did a great job.

She was great.

It was like a very, yeah, it was, I met uh, in the steam room, I met a guy from, uh, who was doing AI up in San Francisco.

Very cool.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Uh, I was like, oh, we're, I was like, oh, I'm an actor.

I like did that sort of thing to him.

But it was a very, it was very relaxing.

But I'm with you.

I don't, I'm like a never nude in those sort of situations, basically.

I have to say, there's a massage that I do love to get.

And I did locate a specific masseuse.

I was like, this is the guy.

Okay.

And

when I tell you twice, I'm convinced my hand grazed his flaccid penis and I didn't care because the massage was so good.

Wow.

And I wasn't violating.

It just was just think about it.

The massage table is at waist.

Yes.

And my hands are at my side.

And I was like, and I could be wrong.

Right.

It could have just been

flesh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But something tells me it wasn't.

Yeah.

But it was fine.

That would be something I would be thinking about the whole rest of the massage.

I didn't realize that I didn't like them really too much until I was kind of in it, but it still felt very, very nice.

I feel better afterwards.

The thing I've done is there's a place out here called Stretch Lab, which is like a small chain and they stretch you out.

I've done that a few times it's like it feels less like touchy it's like athletic massage exactly it's more and it's more like like I'm gonna hold your hamstring

when they stretch me I don't like bendies I tell them don't bend me because I don't like when they take the leg and they start bending you yeah yeah I feel like they're gonna overextend yeah I kind of love that that I'm okay with

but I but I don't know I mean maybe just because it feels more therapeutic for me but yeah the the other there's like a there's like a intimacy I feel like there's someone like kneading my flesh I was like I don't need that of course you're a a very flexible man from stories we've a pretty flexible guy.

Yeah, I'm pretty flexible.

Yeah.

We don't need to get into it.

Let's talk about

coffee a little bit because he sucked his own dick once.

All right.

Oh, my God.

I want to talk about coffee a little bit.

There was a kid I knew that did that watching Swordfish.

Yeah.

The Halle Berry movie.

Yeah, I remember.

I remember it was like we all, like,

like this guy.

Yeah.

Were you watching Swordfish?

He was on Swordfish, and then he sucked his own dick to Swordfish in front of the kids.

Wow.

But he was a kid, too.

So wait, did you see it?

No, I just heard it.

You heard about it.

You heard this story.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And that guy was my first kiss.

Wait, really?

Self-suck guy was your first kiss?

Yeah.

Wow.

Someone's saying that about you somewhere.

My first kiss

was a girl who later went on to be a troubled teen on the Jenny Jones talk show.

Wow.

What the fuck?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She was like my self-defense.

That's what happened after she kissed you.

Yeah.

And then later on, she was like, she was on like Jenny Jones and she was on with her brother and they're both like kids who like did drugs and did crimes.

And she said, she said the line, the thing that could say, like, I would die from using drugs, it was meant to be.

Wow.

That's intense.

Yeah.

Damn, I hope she's doing okay.

I have no idea.

Oh, well, that solves that.

Keep up on these things.

Laura Campbell, my first kiss.

What's up, Laura?

Hope you're doing well.

It was spin the bottle on a trampoline.

Wow.

Yeah, that's fun.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I felt like when I spun it, it felt like the girls were like, uh-oh.

Like, it felt like one of those moments of like,

don't land on me sort of vibe.

I went to a party kind of recently there playing spin the bottle.

Really?

I was like, this is kind of cool.

But I left.

Were they kissing?

I did, or I left the area.

Also, because there was a family friend there.

This is sick Hollywood shit.

But I was kind of like, good for them, you know?

Yeah, I guess so.

It just feels, that feels feels swinger-adjacent.

That feels like people are like, that's like an into the lifestyle.

You're too old for it.

That's like it's cute if you're like in fifth grade.

I was happy for them, but I left.

I would have, I definitely, I think I would have played.

And I think it would have been the same vibe as when I was younger of people not wanting the bottle to land on them.

Yeah.

But, you know, you got to get it any way you can get it, you know, and it counted.

So, uh,

and so that was my first kiss.

And then I met her brother at a Mighty Mighty Boss Stones concert.

He He was like, you were my, like, you kissed my sister.

I was like, yeah, yeah.

All night.

It was great.

Oh, you got along.

Yeah, we got along.

Yeah.

Was it years later?

Yeah, it was like a few years ago.

Hey, how about that?

Yeah.

That's a, and he said, you kissed my sister?

That's what he said.

That was his end.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, that was her first kiss.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

That's sweet.

That's sweet.

That's wholesome.

That's what you want for your sister.

Okay, so coffee, I'm curious.

What is your typical coffee consumption?

I am a Java dog.

I love Java.

I love to, by the way, my caffeine intake, so I'm obsessed with my coffee.

See, there's so much.

Okay, I'm going to calm down.

It's a lot to say.

My coffee culture has transformed because now I'm making it in the home to an overwhelming degree.

Got it.

The Brevil Bambino has changed my life.

Oh,

which is insane.

I still have one of these, and it's the best thing in the world.

Wait, tell me about the Brevil Bambino.

The Brevil Bambino is an espresso.

So listen to me.

You, okay, listen.

Listen.

You know, when you go to the coffee shop and you see them pulling shots of an espresso maker, and you go, one day I could, you know, they look sexy and cool.

They're doing it.

You get to do that in your home, but listen to me.

The Brevil Bambino, we can look it up.

I want to say it's maximum $300.

Okay.

I have tried espresso machines that are $1,000, $1,500, $2,000 in other people's homes, not

doing what the Brevil Bambino does.

It is more.

And I, by the way, read the reviews.

I was getting obsessed before I purchased it.

People going, I, you know, bought a more expensive machine.

I missed the Bambino.

Okay.

It's, you're pulling shots in your home.

Wow.

And then it has a milk foamer nozzle and a little water shooter.

So you're doing Americanos.

You're doing espresso drinks, which I never did.

I did pour over.

I was doing French.

I was doing that hot cup of Joe.

Espresso has less caffeine than a cup of coffee.

Okay.

Which I, a lot of people don't know that.

So my point is that you can't do that.

But

they think that you go nutty.

Espresso seems like, but it's a lot less.

Okay.

the point is my i'm now having this coffee and i can already feel the strength because i had a shot i had a double shot this morning oh interesting so now when i have like for example i used to live right up the street from la colomb intelligencia stroll down there get a cold brew i could drink a cold brew feel almost nothing now when i drink like half at a cold brew i'm sending the craziest emails you could ever imagine they're completely everything i can hardly this is like i even am feeling this i can't do cold brew anymore it's it's interesting how like yeah it makes me feel like i see through time.

Yeah, yeah, it does.

Do you, okay, wait, so I detach from the body.

Yeah.

Because my question with an espresso maker, and Emma, you can, you, you can weigh in on this too, is I always feel like that's tough to maintain.

Is cleaning a pain in the ass or is it pre-speed?

It's so easy.

It is.

It is so easy.

By the way, the amount.

By the way, Brevil, reach out.

This is crazy.

I've been talking about this thing like, but I mean, I paid.

I paid for it.

I never even, I've never even, I have never even heard of the Brevil Bambino.

It's so small, too.

It doesn't take up a space.

It's so compact space.

So small on the counter, folks.

Clean up.

I know all you have to do is take the coffee grounds out of the puck.

Wow.

I'm composting it.

I'm composting in my home.

Oh, God.

I got to get into composting.

I just started a couple of weeks ago.

Yeah.

It gives you a feeling like nothing else.

I got to do that.

I drive and I go, look at all these people on the street.

They're not like, like, it's done something for my posture.

And just knowing.

Yeah.

Got a compost.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And all these other pieces of shit.

Don't do it.

Just raping the earth.

Yeah.

Can you can you out some of those the the can you out some of those fools that have these two thousand dollars espresso machines?

You know, it's more like my my friend who was like really remarking on the quality of the espresso that I made him and he was like my friend has like a two thousand dollar espresso machine and he was like oh making him coffee.

He goes it wasn't as good.

Wow.

And of course by the way beans beans matter.

And you know what also matters?

The grinder as important as the machine.

Grinder as important as the machine.

Write that down.

That's important.

You got to grind that some bitch fresh.

Like, that was a thing I learned.

Like, that's a thing that's been in the recent, the past 10 years of my home coffee journey.

Oh, yeah.

Because I used to buy ground beans.

I was like, what's the difference?

It makes such a big difference to grind at home.

And the quality of the grinder.

So, I mean, the grinder is going to run you 150, okay?

What do you have?

195.

I already forgot what it's called.

I got the Baroxo Encore.

Yeah, that's what I have.

Yeah, it's a good one.

Microwave me one of those as a housewarming present.

Oh, that's good.

That's gorgeous.

Yeah, really sexy and nice.

Every day.

You wake up, you're in Cuba.

You feel like

you just feel, I'm in there grinding beans, the window's open.

It's unbelievable.

I might have to get myself a Brebo Bambino if I have the

best.

Can you get some decaf beans?

Yeah,

I drink decaf.

Plus caffeine.

Yeah, I do decaf a lot.

Guess what I did?

Love cap.

I love decaf.

People came over for dinner.

I made them decaf.

Can you imagine that?

Decaf.

Being able to offer that.

Do you want decaf?

They go, oh, sure.

I'm grinding decaf beans.

I'm making them espresso in the bambino.

That's fantastic.

I'm Italian.

You are, yeah.

I mean, it's.

Are you Italian?

No, I'm Spanish, but I could pass.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, half Spanish, half Jewish.

Yeah, but yeah.

But

it's so, but so, so my coffee life has transformed.

By the way, perfect segue.

Guess who my favorite currently espresso beans are that I purchase?

Ooh, what?

Blue bottle.

Blue bottle, your favorite.

Wow.

Blue bottle.

By the way, I'm loving Joshua Tree.

I love Joshua Tree, espresso.

But I got to say again and again, the blue bottle, fuck, espresso beans are really good.

Blue bottle espresso.

Grinding them in the home.

My intro to this, to like the fancy coffee world was intelligentsia.

You brought it up earlier.

Intelligentsia was ready.

I've got a bag of intelligentsia beans at the house right now.

Wow.

So I'm trying different beans.

And I want to be clear.

I don't consider myself like an expert in coffee.

Like I don't, you know, and I, and I would, maybe, maybe I'll go down that road.

You know, I could see myself getting into tea lately.

I've been considering.

I'm a tea guy.

It's a devastating time in my life.

Yeah.

I'm tea over.

I'm tea over coffee.

What's that?

Low tea.

Like,

like, like herbal tea?

I'll do herbal tea.

I do a liver detox.

You got to be careful with tea.

Why's that?

The pesticides.

You can't be doing bags.

You cannot be doing bags.

Bags are bad.

Bags are bad, wives.

What the fuck?

Bags are bad.

And also, they're leeching.

It's mold and dust.

Yeah.

When you go to a, I go to the grocery store, I laugh.

You go in there, I double over because these are boxes of mold and dust.

People are going, here's my paying for that wow you cannot do it and don't and don't even get me started on the plastic the sexy net teas that are like the little nets right you're just drinking a credit card it's just pure plastic i have i have tea bags all the time get them out of your life you need to be doing so bad what he how do you have your tea i i i have a little tea thing that i got one of those things yeah yeah the little the little metal metal thing that's good you got it you got to get off bags i only do bags in an emergency i guess loose leaf is the other way to go that seems stressful but even that you got you got to make sure this stuff is treated with pesticides.

You wouldn't believe.

I'm sticking with the bags.

Okay.

Bags are easy.

I'm doing the bags.

No, she just told me the bags are.

I believe you.

It's just like, it's the whole thing.

It's a whole thing is your answer.

Look, here's the thing.

Like, I'll probably, I'll probably adopt a different tea method at a certain point.

But like, I just, I.

Hey, right now, if you need bags, that's fine.

That's what, that's what I'm thinking.

That's the thing.

It's like, you know what?

I like, I'm, I'm drinking, I'm drinking tea instead of alcohol.

So like, if I have a little myself.

Well, of course, have if it's bag or a bottle of fine, women, go for the bag, right?

But

in time, if you want to evolve into a more holistic tea regimen, yeah,

why are you getting all high and mighty about tea?

Because you're filled with pesticides.

You've never done this before.

I'm going to stand next to you at the next cookout.

Bugs will be dying all around you because you're filled with fucking pesticides.

Well, you know what?

People would love that if I was like a human bug light.

Because

the bugs would be not swarming the grill.

All right.

Yeah.

You make a good fucking.

I'd be a useful asset at a cookout.

I know.

Wow, you guys get heated on this.

We do.

He's right.

Let's start.

I want to talk about sugarfish before we get into Blue Bottle because this was another chain you talked about.

Maybe discussing.

There are a few chains.

So, because I know you, you guys have covered

it.

We've reviewed it, but still, I would be so coming.

I mean, I could do.

I mean, this is my dream.

Yeah.

To review food.

It is a curse, we will say.

It is.

Yeah, that dream can be something of a nightmare.

Yeah.

I get it.

We did Vegetable Month just because

we were hurting.

so we reviewed carrots.

We did we did uh we did white carrots

orange carrots red carrots.

I actually had transformative carrots.

Fuck, I forgot the name of the car.

Transformative carrots.

I was moaning.

I was McCall McCall's McCall's has a little

they had a carrot that I went, are you kidding me?

This is candy.

The sweetness, the crispness.

I couldn't believe it.

And I would go, what farm is this?

Again, I'm so sorry to not shut out the farm.

I can't remember.

I can't touch another carrot how did you eat it wow like was it raw they're short they're like perfectly like bite-sized but they're they're wild like different like they're growing you know organic it's like knobs of wood and like they're freaky but you didn't roast it or anything you just had it raw raw did you dip it in anything no wow is that good that's wild candy yeah i go these aren't carrots just candy yeah remarket you were you said this to the mccalls person

yeah

he got so excited because i got so excited he could tell it was true in my heart that i I love the carrot so much.

He pulled out another carrot and goes, try this carrot.

And I go, oh my God.

That's crazy.

Yeah, I know.

Connecting with grocers is huge.

Yeah, I love that.

Well, what we learned about carrots is that they usually are monstrous, that they're not like the normal, beautiful carrots that you see.

Yeah, you don't want the wild.

If you're over the age of 50 and you're purchasing baby carrots, I mean, it's insane.

Yeah.

Right.

Kids.

Yeah.

I mean,

it actually broke my heart.

You were so, that was such a sweet, like you.

I knew, I know.

I, I do i get them sometimes

yeah yeah i love i love i when my mom comes out here we'll get a big we'll get a cut of meat and we'll bring it back and have it on our it's going to be

get the carrots they're going to know although i guess we're moving out of carrot season now and they're and they're moving out of that store because it's on it's on

and for a segue

it's it's moving to at water but it's right near where i went to get blue bottle blue bottle coffee which i do want to talk about but that's where i went i am curious about sugarfish okay yeah you want a fan sugarfish no no so i guess what on i said something about fish, yeah, because I've been uh, I wouldn't say I frequent sugar fish, I probably haven't been in years, actually.

Got it.

So, move on.

Next question.

All right, no, no, I think, um,

I go in and out.

No, I did because I was like, oh, sugarfish, yeah.

I mean, there are a lot of chains that I would respond to in a huge way.

Got it.

Throw me some chains.

Yeah.

Uh, an out burger, huge.

Bat burger, we mentioned both of them.

We really haven't had many much experience with Fat Burger or Five Guys.

Ooh, all right.

Interesting.

fat burger is more of an la thing five guys is from dc yeah yeah but yeah i i i like i like all of them um yeah sugarfish is it's like i actually haven't been in a while myself getting scared a little like sushi like i get i've been getting a little sushi scared lately really why is that because of the parasites and their worms in your brain and stuff a lot of them are frozen like it's like

no no the the sushi is frozen and that's what you want yeah because then then it kills the parasites it's like the same as cooking i really hope that's okay yeah but i i don't know like

I like sushi a lot.

My thing with sugarfish is like it's great in terms of

it's kind of blue bottle adjacent and it's packaged in a very presentable way.

It's very easy to grasp.

But I also feel like living in LA, there's so many great sushi spots that all just go slowly.

Usually the grass is filled with all that pesticide.

The wormies are going to die.

So go roll.

Yeah.

Love.

Yeah.

Chankton, my friend Chankton and Wu-Tang, texted me at 4.27

Fat Burger.

They got Fat Burger last night.

427 in vegas they're still there oh my god they're yeah they're leaving woo left a few hours after that um sugarfish to me it's like oh high school like trust me or whatever trust me light yeah trust me i loved i love the trust me i mean to me it was also that's what intelligentsia was my uh like my introduction to fancy coffee yeah yeah and then uh and my introduction to like sushi that I liked was sugar fish.

It's designed to be, it is designed that way.

It's like starter sushi.

You have a thing that's called trust me.

It's like, I don't know what this is.

I don't have to make any of these decisions.

You're going to tell me what everything is, what sauce it goes with.

It's a very curated experience.

And it's a good idea.

And it's a goblin.

It's a genius.

It's great.

Yeah.

It's well done.

You got to go to Santo across the street, though.

I got to hit up Santo.

Also,

the most exquisitely well-dressed men.

It's like all these gorgeous, like straight guys who are dressed like perfectly.

It's shocking.

Oh, man.

I get it.

And they're like,

yeah, it's insane.

Man, yeah, I'm going to look like shit in there.

I felt like I looked like shit in blue and blue bottle today.

Like,

I'm going to say that.

I'm not us going to that sushi place and being like the two slobbiest guys in there.

Just being like complete shit.

It is.

The bar is high.

It's like shocking.

Oh, man.

Yeah, we'd look like shit.

Casey can go.

Casey would be fine.

Yeah, Casey can go and report back to us.

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I'm Blue Bottle today.

I gotta say this: first of all, yes, it looks like an Apple.

The logo?

That ain't an accident.

The store looks like Apple.

Like an Apple store.

Yes.

Yeah, yeah.

Like an Apple store.

Yeah.

Well, yeah, yeah.

I ain't talking Gwyneth's daughter, my man.

Yeah.

Apple store.

Yeah.

Fucking Apple store.

Does it not look like an Apple store?

No, it does.

It looks so much like an apple store.

And that's intentional.

Right.

And I don't know if I like that.

Clean lines.

It's sterilized beyond.

It's very sterile.

are these facts easy to pull up?

Okay, because by the way, the blue bottle propaganda is working on me because I start going, this started in Japan.

No, it didn't.

No.

It started in one, San Francisco.

They kind of act like it was

because they make a point of like, this is manufactured in Japan or this is imported from Japanese.

It worked on me, but where did it start?

No, it started in Oakland, California.

It was founded in 2002 by W.

I don't know why.

By W.

James Freeman.

Sorry.

2002 by W.

James Freeman, who was

right across the pond from Japan.

Yeah, yeah.

It is is right across the pond.

Thank you.

You're right.

You're absolutely right.

Imagine being an early.

Imagine getting some stocks in that.

Imagine getting some of those points in that.

Imagine that.

Hey, my cousin's friend is starting a coffee thing.

Imagine that.

Getting it on the ground floor.

How about that?

Mitch, this is the founder,

like me,

someone who plays Woodwinds, a former professional clarinetist.

Wow.

And, you know, was pretty tenuous trying to play in orchestras as a clarinetist.

So he's like, I'm going to roast coffee beans on the side.

Founded blue bottle.

Is he single?

I I don't have that influence

here.

He is a, I'll get a picture in a second.

I started roasting.

I had such a personal connection to Blue Bottle.

I apologize.

Oh, no, it's fine.

No, it's all right.

Yeah.

Freeman roasted his own coffee beans in a shed at his home in Oakland.

He launched a coffee cart.

It became a hit in 2004.

In 2005, he opened a brick and mortar in San Francisco.

2010, it goes to Williamsburg.

And in 2017,

Nestle, one of the most villainous companies on earth, acquired a majority share of the company.

So they are the owner of this right now.

Today, with over 100 locations in North America and Asia, and they do play up the Asian locations for sure.

Net worth, go.

How much is the company valued at now?

Wages.

Let's hear it.

I'll have to look it up.

I'll find a picture of the guy and I'll look up its company's value.

Oh, yeah.

I want to see the picture of the guy.

Because the Williamsburg location, because

I used to live over there,

very sexy location.

Sorry, I just also similarly Apple's story or no?

Yeah, I think that's just uniform.

Okay, like it's just that, and I have to say, there is something.

I just, I opened my browser, and you know, it's like the last thing that you have we're looking at.

Um, I'm looking at the Poké decks, this Entei from Pokémon.

Cool, cool.

So, you fool, that was the last thing I was looking at.

You're a guest.

Entei embodies the passion of magma.

This Pokemon is thought to have been born in the eruption of a volcano.

It sends up massive bursts of fire that utterly consume all that they touch.

It is a fire type.

Are you fire type, grass type, water type?

Water.

Okay, cool.

Yeah.

Kind of a water type, too, I think.

Blastoise, those

are all.

Okay, let me look up what Blue Bottle Market Cap.

Hold on one second.

Thank you.

And we want a picture of the guy.

I'll look up a picture of the guy, too.

What's his name?

They're two steps.

I'll look up the picture of the guy.

Okay, the guy is named W.

James Freeman.

So kind of a generic name.

So maybe include a W.

James Freeman.

W.

James.

What's he protecting?

W.

James Freeman.

I bet it's just William.

I bet it's nothing exciting.

And then, like, maybe add blue bottle onto that.

So that'll.

Google W.

James Freeman wife.

That's a good one, too.

I'm going to find that.

I'll do that as Wags does its own thing.

I love how so many.

That's just like every celebrity just auto-completes to wife.

Yeah.

Okay.

I think I got him.

I think I found him here.

Are you ready?

Wax?

Yeah.

Here we go.

One, two, three.

Here's a picture of him here.

Wax.

Ah, you're good.

You're good.

Okay, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He looks good.

He looks pretty good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a picture of Blastoise for the audio listeners.

W.

James Freeman.

Pitch book.

I don't know how.

Wait, Hindman?

W.

James.

W.

J.

Freeman.

W.J.

Hindman.

W.

James.

That sounds like a serial killer.

I'll look up who he is afterwards.

Imagine him coming home for Christmas.

His parents so proud he sold the company.

Yeah.

You took a coffee cart.

Can you imagine?

But then he, I bet he also has to get like, he does stop doodling around that little clarinet of yours.

Like, like, they kind of like dismiss that artistic passion he was pursuing, you know.

Probably gave it up for life.

He probably did, and that's kind of like I would, I would not like to be that for someone to dismiss that.

Like, you got a real job.

It was like, okay, well, I wanted to play the clarinet.

Like, get off my bed.

It's amazing what people will do when their passions are squandered.

Yeah.

Um, Market Cat.

I've I've found him.

I found W.

James.

Uh, okay, great.

James Freeman.

Your reaction is interesting.

Something's going on.

You got a freaking nerd on your hands.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.

Torrent?

He's cute.

Yeah,

he's an attractive nerd.

Yes.

Very nerd.

He's a nerd nonetheless.

Japanophile, for sure.

Yeah, he plays in the Oakland Symphony.

It looks like some of the people.

Oh, he does.

He maintains his clarinet.

How about that?

That's actually really sweet.

I like that.

I like that.

And doing a solo.

Yeah, that's a lot of fun.

$700 million, the market cap for

Blue Bottle Coffee Facebook.

I assume he lives in San Francisco.

Imagine his home.

Want me to read you his profile from the Oakland Symphony?

Yeah.

James Freeman's first memory of coffee comes from when he was four or five, growing up in rural Humboldt County, California.

His parents let him open a container of MJB coffee.

He remembers the whoosh as the air rushed from the vacuum-sealed can.

I love this.

And the rich fragrance of the pre-ground beans.

Wow.

This is his Oakland Symphony profile.

I don't know why it's talking about coffee so much.

Do you think this is now a thing I'm, I don't know if this is true.

This could be completely invalid.

Do you think he's like a booster of the symphony and so they put him in the orchestra?

Because that would be

like he's like a huge donor and they're just like, well, all right, let him be like third chair clarinet.

It's fine.

When it comes to Pokemon, he prefers the grass type.

Wow.

Very interesting.

Yeah.

I can't tell if he is single.

He makes pilgrimages to a cafe near Shibuya Station in Tokyo.

Ooh, I'd like to know know what that one's going to be.

Shatai Hato, which I definitely butcher that, which brews individual cups of coffee for $15 a piece.

Mr.

Freeman, if you want to make the trip, Mr.

Freeman describes him as life-changing perfection.

I might be in Shibuya in fall.

Really?

Really?

Yeah.

Wait, why?

Considering a fun trip.

Oh, just for funsies.

Yeah.

Have you ever been there?

Yeah, I went to Japan once,

like 2019.

Wow.

I want to go back.

That's cool.

I've never crossed an ocean.

You've got to cross it quick.

Where's your favorite, like,

are you traveling with you?

Where's your favorite

place you visited?

I mean, I love,

I was in Italy last summer, actually, with John Early and Claudia, Doherty, friends of the show, Poliscola.

We love them.

Had an amazing time.

I really do love Tokyo.

I really love Mexico City.

I've been there several times.

Mitch loves Mexico City.

Yeah.

Did you go to Pujol?

Yeah.

Fantastic.

Beautiful.

See, here's the thing.

I don't love, I like love it for for the theater, but that's not like my favorite way to eat, really.

Sure, yeah.

A bunch of mini players.

Or just like the, like, it's a, like, it's just, it's fun, and, but it's not something that I like, it doesn't,

I don't know.

It's, it doesn't really get me off the way.

I think I wish it did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, I, I get what you're saying.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm more of a

bourdain on the corner with the

but I um but no, but it was exquisite and beautiful.

Yeah.

No, I no, I'm I think we're I'm more, I'm

sugar fish.

But, um,

uh,

yeah, maybe I am a traveler.

What, okay, do you have any favorite Rome?

Do you have any favorite food memories from like go from Italy?

From Italy.

Actually, well, the, the, the big food thing that happened in Italy was John and I went, the two of us, to Rome, and we had, people, by the way, people talk shit on Rome.

They do?

Get a life.

Yeah.

People are like, the crowns.

I'm like, it's Rome.

Like, yeah, people are there.

I dislike Italian cultures, Italian people.

Right.

But I liked Rome quite a bit.

I love Rome.

I love Italy.

And by the way, I was like, I'm coming to Italy every year for the rest of my life.

Really?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And like going on the show.

I didn't discuss that, though.

No, here it is a year later.

I didn't fucking go.

Well, it's expensive.

It's extravagant, you know?

I want to go.

I want to spend time in Naples.

We were on the coast.

Okay.

You know, we were cooking.

Honestly, one of the best things they ate in

all of Italy was Claudia Adoherty's fucking pasta.

She's pavonara that she made.

She's a fantastic.

She really is good.

She really is good.

But John and I went all these restaurants.

People say, you know, go here, go here, but good luck because you need to make a reservation three months in advance.

We went to all those places.

We got lucky walking up, waiting, got into every, every spot, had some beautiful meals.

But I have to tell you,

finally, like three weeks after the trip, John and I were able to admit to each other.

That the meals kind of didn't live up.

Wow.

Still had a wonderful time.

It didn't matter because the only thing more important than food is ambiance and company.

So it was like, we had this great time, but something

didn't a couple of the pastas.

I went, oh, shit.

Yeah.

That sucks.

Because we've got mozza down the street here in LA.

It's very

great Italian food you can find in LA.

Yeah, for sure.

Also, by the way, three funny, glamorous people like the three.

What restaurants are going to fucking turn you down?

What?

What a, yeah.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It was, it was a beautiful experience.

We would not have gotten the same experience, you and I.

Okay, so let's talk about blue bottle.

So,

I, I, like, I've been to Blue Bottle a number of times.

Um, I can't, I don't say I'm like a blue bottle fan, but like, I've just been like, they're just around and I just go there.

What I've had with Blue Bottle is that feeling of deep relief when you're traveling in like a city that you don't live in.

And then you, like, I was doing this little job in San Francisco several months ago, and I was like, fuck, like, like leaving like my hotel where I was staying.

I was like, there's this desolate, like, where am I going to?

I see in the distance a blue bottle.

And when I tell you the comfort that washed over me, I was like, I'm safe.

Yeah.

Like, I'm going to have coffee, a good coffee I can get every day.

Yeah.

They have avocado toast.

They have water.

You know, I was, I was like, I,

it was a huge relief to me.

Yeah.

Do I seek out blue bottle?

Am I getting my car?

Well, now that I'm a Brevo Bambino girl, I mean, I have everything I need at home.

But I still love to go out for a coffee, but I don't find myself driving to Blue Bottle necessarily, although it is very good.

And if a blue bottle is standing next to a groundwork, I'm not stupid.

I'm going to go to Blue Bottle.

Right.

Well, you could just brew up.

My favorite Groundworks.

What's that?

I don't know.

It came up for me.

Yeah.

You could brew up something with the Brevo Bambino, and then you could go to like an Apple store instead if you wanted to get the same experience.

You don't have to go to a Blue Bottle wise.

Right, because the architecture is so similar.

It resembles an Apple store.

Got it.

Yes.

So I will say,

not like a Blue Bottle fan.

I'm going to say the same as you.

Did it used to come in a glass bottle?

Didn't Blue Bottle come in a bottle or am I making that up?

It had to have.

I thought it did.

I thought that was the origin of it.

By the way, this, I have to say, like the pre-made coffees, like

stored in

little bottle.

When I was in the store,

weird crowd.

Something was going on.

But this woman came in.

I'm going to say weird owl.

I'm not very excited.

Man, there was a crowd in there.

Do coffee songs.

Trying out.

This woman came in with a big canvas bag, she had a really cute baby.

The baby was, everyone was going, Oh my god, she, I was really intrigued by her order.

She ordered just a giant bottle, like it was almost like cold, but it was like in the back.

I like pulled it out for her, big, and she puts it in her canvas tote and leaves.

And I went, That's a mother.

Yeah, yeah, it was unbelievable.

That's awesome, but but

but the marketing really is brilliant.

And I have to say, the fact that they put the cold, this is cool, they put the cold coffees in a paper cup.

Yeah, yeah, something about that.

I was confused after it.

I like it.

Look.

It's very confusing.

You go, oh, I ordered a cold.

They go,

it is cold.

I like to talk to someone that works there how many times a day they have to tell people, don't worry, there's ice in there because it's really confusing.

It looks like a hot drink.

And it's the same, it's the same.

Like, I've got a cold drink here.

This is what I'm holding up to camera.

This is an iced matcha, iced matcha latte.

And this one, yeah, it has, it looks like a hot drink.

Again, if you didn't see the condensation on the

milk, oat milk.

Oat milk is their default milk, which is interesting.

But you're joking.

No,

if you look at the app, it says oat milk is their, their standard milk.

I assume this is a, an environmental move in there.

I guess it's probably also so many people order, like, especially in the cities where they have locations, probably so many people order an alternative to dairy milk.

Yeah.

So, and, and almond milk, uh, which you know, I accidentally consumed earlier, is so like it's an upcharge there.

Oat milk is the same price, I think, but almond milk is like an extra two dollars.

But almond milk is like so horrible for the environment.

I just avoid that.

Yeah, you reminded me, there was a baby at the Dead and Company show.

Was there really?

With the headphones on.

With the headphones on.

By itself.

Yeah.

Yeah, totally.

Yeah.

And also, there was a lady with

a support dog.

And I was just like, don't bring the dog at the sphere.

Dogs and babies not at the concert.

Don't bring them to the concerts.

Don't bring him to the sphere.

Don't bring it to the sphere.

I mean,

it's nice that they're alive.

It was an emotional support dog, but like you could, I just felt bad for the damn dog.

Yeah, that's rummer for the dog.

It's going to be so loud.

And your baby's not having fun, no way.

Baby's not at fun.

And by the way, you're having fun with your baby, doubtful.

Yeah.

Yes, I agree.

Why bring the baby?

If you ask me, I guess childcare fell through.

I guess so.

Also, someone handed me a joke.

Someone handed you a joke.

Someone handed me a joint.

And I was going to say it was like a dog paw, or it was the dog, or it was the baby.

It could have been any one of those things.

It would have been so much fun.

But I said joke because that's what it was.

That's what I was thinking of.

of joke that's all right

yeah yeah we still liked it yeah I'm if I hadn't been caffeinated like this that I would have knocked out of the park you would have been like I'm happy that I came on the show

I'm having a blast and by the way high as hell on the coffee yes it is

anything anything go off script okay worst person in Hollywood

You're gonna have, you're having a, yeah, you got, you got a big show you're doing.

You're taping your special.

I like this.

Are you gonna, are you gonna eat beforehand or you save your to have a meal afterwards?

I can't get on stage unless I'm fully digested.

Really?

Three hours.

Three hours.

Three hours.

What do you eat?

Last bite.

Depends on the show.

I mean,

when I was doing my show,

very regularly,

I do get a little bit monkish around that because I'm so scared of getting sick.

And like, I don't have any dietary restrictions.

Like, I'll eat everything, but I am a little bit, like, around that, I'm kind of sticking to just like, you know, protein and vegetables.

Okay.

Yeah.

Avoiding refined sugar, grains, things like that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It is, it is, it is funny when like, whatever, you're watching a TV show and you're like, oh, that was after lunch.

I just had like a chicken club sandwich or some shit.

Yeah, it is.

It is, it's a nightmare to be full.

And I've had it happen.

Like I was doing my show in New York, like Christmas Eve, you know, and I was like, I'm getting burnt, got Shake Shack for everyone.

Ate it.

Affected the show.

I mean, not really, not really, but like, I just was like, you know, you don't want to eat a cheeseburger and walk out on stage.

I did.

I made that connection in eighth grade orchestra.

We,

I was playing the clarinet.

Um,

first chair.

And I went and I got a, I, we went and I got a chili cheese fries pre-show.

Like a fucking huge plate of chili cheese fries.

And my parents are like, you sure you want to eat that?

I was like, I'm fine.

And then like I'm up there playing my clarinet solo or whatever.

My stomach's just grumbling so loud.

It's so embarrassing.

But I like, it took me so long in life to realize that what I put into my body affects, like that wasn't even lesson learned.

I was just like,

it was years after where I was like, what I put in my body affects how I feel later.

Yeah.

You know, W.

James Hindman founded Jiffy Lube.

Oh, wow.

Another captain of industry.

That's yeah.

Yep.

Did he play a Woodwind?

Hindman made his first million in the early 1970s buying and selling nursing homes.

That sounds like a good guy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, shit.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That is a nightmare.

That's, yeah, that's.

Yeah.

Here he is.

I don't know what instrument he plays.

Whoa.

I'm guessing Oboe in the Cleveland Symphony.

Yeah, probably.

All right.

You're going to be honest with us.

Wags and I, you've now, I've known you longer than Wags.

Your hair, like your hat is skewed.

It's making you look more unhinged.

Just straighten it out.

Oh, okay.

Sorry.

You're worried about us getting into, what's the place, Caldigan?

Huh?

What's the fancy place where everyone dresses nice, Caldigan?

Oh, Santo.

You're afraid of us getting into Santo?

Yeah, we're not going to get into Santo if your hat's not straight.

Why are you going to treat me like it's the Yankees?

I am fucking, I look fine, okay?

You look great.

I'm just like you're, you seem more unhinged when you're.

I am unhinged today.

Uh, Wags and I, I've known you longer than Wags.

Uh, but from your experience today, would you comp us to one of your shows?

Are you kidding me?

Each with a plus one.

Wow.

Oh, okay.

He's definitely not coming, by the way.

He's not going to come out.

Hey, Casey.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then what level for you would it be of like, Nick and Mitch want to say hi?

So would it be pre-show, post-show, or like, just get rid of them?

We're post.

Okay.

Yeah, come back.

Yeah.

Grab a seltzer.

I would love that.

I'd love to do that.

You got a liquid death back there.

Yeah.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Okay.

So I went to the Hayden Tract location, which is in, it's near the Culver City train stop.

I was going to say, oh, okay, true.

You're literal with the track.

It's true.

It's right, like, it's right off the train stop.

It's one of those ones where that's part of its convenience.

But the other thing is, like, there's another, like, fancy, I forget the fuck it's called.

I think it's called like Equator Coffee or something like that.

There's another, like, fancy coffee place, like, just like steps away.

So, it's, you know, there's options there.

Um, the service, I will say, was fantastic.

They were super friendly, great service for me as well.

Super duper nice there, and it was kind of like late afternoon, later than I normally get coffee, so it was kind of a sleepier crap.

I mean, sleepier in terms of there weren't there wasn't a big line or anything.

I was the only person waiting.

I got the somralatte.

Now, here's the thing: oh, I saw that.

This costs seven dollars and 75 cents.

That's a lot for 12 ounces.

Machi machi.

That's pretty pricey.

And we're talking about just drip.

The summer latte, the weekend's favorite drink, now available in cafes.

Okay.

This latte combines honey, vanilla,

and a dusting of Ethiopian cinnamon.

So it's honey, vanilla, and cinnamon.

I got oat, which was their default milk for this one.

I got it with their nightlight decaf.

And it's again late in the day for caffeine for caffeine for me.

And then I got it with no added sugar.

Served hot?

Served hot.

Yeah.

This was delicious.

It was delightful.

Oh, my God.

It was really, really sweet.

How sweet.

Talk to me about sweetness.

Not really sweet at all.

Like, just like you kind of got that sort of essence of.

Because I don't like sugar in my coffee.

Yeah, I don't want it too sweet.

And the cinnamon was really nice.

And I the weekend, you son of a bitch.

This is a thing.

He lost us with the idol.

He got us back with a sam rulatte.

Yeah.

I was talking to.

What did he do with the idol?

Isn't that his show?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, what?

Oh, yeah.

Was that like a horny show or or something?

It was like a horny show that no one liked.

Yeah, yeah.

Anyway, sorry if you were in it.

I don't know.

I was never offered a role.

Wow.

Though they did do an avail check.

Wow.

Okay.

Okay.

Even it hurts even harder.

What?

Yeah, I know.

It's a bummer.

Because then you think of like what the show would have been if you had been watching.

When the avail check comes, I go, I fucking, we're in.

We're in, baby.

I got two avail checks recently.

Nada.

Nothing came.

Tough right now.

Now, now, here's the thing: thing.

For our listeners.

You'll bleep that.

Nothing.

For our listeners who aren't in the industry.

Maybe they're just fucking fucking with me.

I don't know what the deal was.

Why do that?

Well, I go, don't tell me about the check.

Call me when that's the offer.

That's the way to do it.

For our listeners who aren't in the industry, what is an available check?

For the people who aren't in the industry, we don't really care about you.

We're talking to industry folks.

Here's an industry episode.

Your agent will call you and they say they're checking dates, they're checking your availability.

We possibly want to hire you for something, so we need to first make sure that you're available for the time when we will be shooting it.

Yeah.

And then, and so sometimes, like, oh, okay, something's really looking at me for something.

And then sometimes they were, it was just a chat

more often than not.

Yes, no, then it doesn't happen.

Because they went, they actually went out to 12 different people and then, like, you know, whatever, they went to someone else.

Yeah.

I just recently, the other one I got just recently, also not a man who works regularly.

I, I work okay.

You do great.

You turn a hit peacock show.

Yeah.

That's kind of you.

But they were like, they did like an avel check and they're like, it shoots for a few days in Europe and then like it shoots in New York.

I was like, oh my God.

Hello.

This is the best thing in the world.

Yeah.

Nothing.

I don't even know.

They play with your heart in this town.

The bomber.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But you got to take, you know, you got to be happy when you get one of those, I guess.

The avail check is a huge win.

It's a huge win.

Yeah.

It is a huge win.

Someone possibly wants you, which is nice.

nice to think about uh by the way sommer latch was delicious you might get an avail check soon by the way really

i have some inside news i swear to god a veil check for the doughboys podcast

uh i also got the lemon yuzu fizz i almost got this almost great it was also great it was really good and it was not too sweet i like both the drinks so much i came so because i love yuzu yeah and i saw i go get the fizz and i literally got a little shy i go go, I'm going a little crazy with the order.

Let's relax.

Yeah.

No, I would not normally get scared drinks.

I got one hot drink, one cold drink.

It was a warm day as it's been lately.

And the food?

Loved them both.

So here's the food I got.

I got the sun-dried tomato baker's kneaded scone.

The brand is Baker's Kneaded.

I kind of hated that.

Sucked.

This was awful.

Did you have this?

No, no, I just hated the sound of it.

Wow, that bad.

I thought it was really bad.

I thought it was really dry.

Like a lot of scones get dry, but then I was just like, the flavor of the sun-dried tomato wasn't offering anything.

It was just kind of inert.

And it kind of, you know, it tasted

it tasted like a stale focaccia.

You know what I mean?

Like, it's just like, I, I, I did not like it.

If you're going to go over the scone route, you have to perfect that because a great scone, I mean, it's, it's, it's an undertaking, a scone.

Yeah.

The other thing I got was a browned butter blondie, which was delicious.

I loved that.

It was great.

Here's the issue.

It was basically the size of like two croutons grafted together.

It was tiny and it cost three dollars.

So I felt like I was being ripped off.

It was like a little piece of nigiri sushi.

Like it was like a little tiny, like basically in a mousse bouche.

I was done with that some bitch in two bites, but it was delicious.

Brown butter blondie fuck.

It was really yummy.

Two croutons fashioned together?

Is that what you said?

Yeah.

That's a good description of it.

You know, it's like just in terms of how big it was.

I also got a bag of beans, which I brewed up this morning.

No, no, no.

I did.

By the way, I was picturing beans, like not coffee beans.

I was picturing like face beans, like pinto beans.

No, I I got the

mocha java blend whole beans, which is a reinterpretation of their first ever blend back when uh W.

James Freeman had his coffee cart in Oakland.

And I brewed up this morning, it's a great cup of great cup of Joe.

Really liked it.

I'm telling you, the espresso beans for me are multiple purchases.

Drinks great, food kind of whatever, one bad, one pretty fun.

Uh, Mitch, what did you do, uh, beverage and food-wise?

I'm jealous because you guys sound like you got good drinks, and I, uh, I, I, uh, I, I, I, my drinks were okay.

I got the, the cafe latte.

Okay.

And I was already kind of jittery before I went in there.

So before I drank coffee and I couldn't say cafe correctly for like this was this morning.

This morning.

That went yesterday.

And I was saying calf, I was like trying to pronounce cafe and I couldn't say it to the lady.

What'd you say?

I, I, I think I said

cake.

I didn't say cake over and over again to the lady.

I don't know.

I just was like,

cafe.

I was like losing my mind.

And then she was like, cafe, latte.

And I was like, yes, please.

And then I got the cafe mocha.

Was the,

and I got that hot.

I got the cap.

I got an ice cafe.

See, this is the same issue.

Cafe.

Cafe.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cafe.

Cafe latte.

And I got that iced.

And I didn't like either.

I liked the mocha way more than I liked.

What was the trouble?

This is just, to me, is like milky ice.

Oh, Mitchu Spill.

milky ice spill this is like milky ice milky thank you thank you uh milky it's like milky ice water to me it was i don't do lattes for that reason i'm like i don't really want a glass of milk yeah that's it was it was i got it with whole milk both of them i got

one yeah with whole milk and it wasn't there was like no sweetness at all and i guess if i had known i would have made it sweet

i would have pumped it up yeah uh and sugar-free peppermint that's i would have been fantastic especially with that mocha yeah

and the mocha was good but it wasn't and actually it was decent because it was sweet but not too too sweet for a mocha uh that was by far my favorite drink but the fit i should have gotten the fizz fizz was great um and then i got the uh the what's it called the

almond toast almond butter toast right so did i what did you think can you tell

Well, I got a couple toasts.

Yeah.

Mitch brought in his leftover almond toast and it looked like shit.

Yeah.

So, so it did.

I have to say, visually, I was like, okay.

So the almond butter, I would say good quality almond butter.

Yes.

But the toast that I had,

clearly to me, it was toasted in a way to overcompensate for the fact that it wasn't fresh.

Yeah.

And I had bare bread.

So the almond was there in the middle with the jam, but I'm talking about.

some little quarters of a centimeter there of just raw bread without olive oil, without anything touching it, just the crispy.

And I go, don't do that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And here's another thing.

What's that jam?

Quince.

It's quince jam.

What I had was quince.

Can't they put a fucking strawberry jam on there for crying out like that?

The jam to me wasn't spectacular.

Yeah, I was just, I was just very okay on it was very okay.

Yeah, I was, I was, I wanted it to be so much more.

There was a ham and cheese croissant, which I felt, or, or is it a baguette?

What is a baguette?

All felt on the menu, yeah.

All their pastries, to your point, seemed like it was a day old or more.

They all seemed, none of it seemed fresh.

We'd have to sound the alarm on the pastries

because I also went in there and got chocolate croissant.

I go, this is great.

Croissant.

I go,

I took a bite and I didn't continue.

Yeah.

I could tell when my knife hit the top.

Well, visually, I went.

When my knife plunged into it to cut it, not a sound.

No crisp, no flake.

Silent.

And then the bite was

silence.

That's.

I didn't care to continue.

God, that's such a bummer.

That was a bummer.

And by the way, Simon and Garfunkel.

How much of those croissants?

Fucking $5?

This is the other thing.

So, so we actually got a little bit of

an extra blue bottle this morning just to like, like I pre-show.

We figured we'd have it on the show.

And so I got this ice matcha latte.

I also got the chocolate croissant.

And you witnessed me eating this in the kitchen.

I heard it.

Same experience.

Yes.

Or didn't hear it?

You didn't hear it.

Yeah.

Exactly.

Same experience.

I took a bite of the chocolatey part, and then I took a bite of the non-chocolatey part just for contrast.

And I was like, I'm done with this.

I thought it was awful.

I really didn't like it.

It was like an airport Starbucks tier chocolate croissant.

James Freeman started Blue Bottle Coffee in 2002 and has since helped lead the West Coast coffee movement.

His wife, Caitlin Williams Freeman,

left her pastry

company,

Miete.

whose ginger snaps are on our big eat in 2008, around the same time she married James.

So his wife is coming from a pastry company well they're the brand they're using is called bakers kneaded and maybe that's a good bakery maybe they do good product what they're serving in store is not fresh and by the way that's hard you gotta i mean it's a you know it's a tall order to supply yeah chains like that but you got you gotta you gotta do it your coffee joint but it is and and you know to to talk about a very different chain that's appealing to a very different demographic but a place that has suffered from a lack of freshness mitch your beloved dunkin' donuts yes like there's stuff when it started being made in industrial kitchens outside

and shipped into the stores, it lost a lot of its luster.

I had one of the most inedible breakfast items I've ever had at a Duncan.

Wow.

Wow.

It was, what was it?

It was like a breakfast, I guess it was a breakfast sandwich.

There's no words.

It was really shocking.

Can I be honest with you?

Yeah.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe any of the story.

It sounds like bullshit.

But wait, where was I?

I want to, I'll say, this was probably two years years ago

doesn't add up to me where was i

it's gone i was not in los angeles oh interesting you can't name the spot you're at

it was like i didn't bring up the menu but i think it was a disgusting item i ordered like it was an egg white bullshit oh yeah they do like yeah some of those can be really bad i mean they it look dunk i like their breakfast i love a donut i mean i i mean i love donuts the donuts can they they vary because they get chipped in but sometimes they can be great and then also the sandwich like if i get a croissant sandwich i know that they microwave the eggs and the bacon, but I still like it.

But I, it's my, it was founded in my hometown.

I'm, that's a huge, it's a huge accomplishment for me.

My hometown of Quincy, Massachusetts, the home of Dunkin' Donuts.

My hometown of Lakewood, California, the home of Denny's.

That's right.

It's in our blood, bitch.

We're breakfast boys.

Yeah, anyway.

We're breakfast boys.

I'm not

breakfast.

I'd rather have Dunkin' than blue bottles.

Wags, same.

And I'm going to say this.

Two things I'm going to say here.

One, right outside the window here, the Yeasty Boys truck is sitting there.

And I'm like, fuck.

I want a nice bagel from Yeasty Boys.

Totally.

And I'm eating this thing.

And then across the street from there, I just got to give it a shout out, Wags.

Fuck, what's the coffee place?

Coffee Bean.

The coffee bean is across the street.

And when you order a chocolate croissant, from Coffee Bean,

they heat it up for you,

which they don't even fucking offer at Blue Bottle, and it's twice the price.

Why can't you heat it up?

Wow.

It's a napkin.

I got pissed off.

I wrinkled up a napkin.

I'm pissed.

I mean, there's no crunch anyways.

Why can't you fucking heat that thing up?

Oh, for sure.

Yeah.

The texture was really bad.

And it's just, I don't know.

Chocolate croissant at coffee bean is better than blue bottle.

I agree with you, Mitch.

I think that's well argued.

McCall's is right there, too.

Sure is.

What else do we get this morning?

Kate, you got the.

I got, and this is good.

I got just a cold brew with oat milk.

Fun.

And it's good.

Yeah.

I got to say it's good.

I also had an avocado toast while I was there.

How was avocado toast?

Well, see, same issue where some of the circumstances we're having some bread that's just raw.

It's untouched by product and you just can't have that.

The avocado, I'll say,

perfectly ripened.

Had some nice lemon in there, had some nice acid.

Sure.

But I remember having like a truly delicious, oh my God, it's all coming back.

I had an avocado toast at Blue Bottle in San Francisco that had like little like some kind of pickled Japanese radish on it.

It had really nice spice on top, like a sumac or something.

I remember going, God, damn, this is good.

The other day, in a pinch, in an emergency, I'd be happy to have that avocado toast, but

didn't.

It wasn't sufficient.

They've probably done some things just to streamline production.

But then when they make those little things, like, we're not going to dust on the sumac anymore, like whatever.

There was some kind of like spice on top.

Yeah, sure.

It was totally acceptable.

It wasn't bad, but it just

for $10.

$10.

That's the big thing.

And look, I feel like I'm immune to sticker shock just from meeting at so many places in LA that are outrageously expensive.

I went to Chipotle yesterday.

I spent like fucking $16.

It was ridiculous.

Chipotle has, I mean, it's inedible.

Yeah.

I mean,

mine yesterday was fine.

It was not great.

I've had some heartbreaking.

I was recently in a foreign town.

And by foreign town, I mean like Tahoe.

Okay.

And had a Chipotle bowl

i almost threw it across the room wow wow i mean i took a couple bites i go

i couldn't do it yeah i couldn't believe it that's that it is right whatever happened to rice and beans it's it's everything is it's funny to do this podcast and see prices go way up and quality go down it's just what's happening but but anyway i'm i feel like i'm somewhat immune to sticker shock just because even chipotle but then also also there's like so many like high-end, like we did fucking Erewhon on the show.

Like there's so many places that charge an outrageous amount of money here in LA.

I would have killed to be the one to cover Erewhon.

I tried.

Because imagine going in there.

So Amelia.

Amelia seemed to relay that you were keen on sugarfish, but it seems like you're more into Erewhon.

Erewhon is like the cornerstone of my life.

Wow.

Okay.

But

I had to physically move away from them because I would go once, twice a day.

You were just going all the time.

Going all the time.

What did you get?

Wow.

so i luckily i went so hard on the hot bar there for so long that now i like got it out of my system they do have a great hot bar it's just expensive and i gotta tell you something open 7 a.m to 10 p.m i heard they now extend it to 11.

wow so if you're crazy you're working you're busy knowing you can get i mean that's huge in los angeles yeah yeah with like we said late night options the lunch options i mean yeah but but so i was doing hot bar a lot and and then i mean sorry the produce is gorgeous let me cry yeah it is make you cry

it's incredibly expensive but some of the little to-go things i love some of their little desserts the raw brownie stuff like that i don't go hard on the smoothies i think that's a waste of money there i've had luck with their packaged sushi and i've also i got like a like a 15 it's probably like 17 breakfast burrito there once this is speaking to how early it is a bad one there it was a good one mine was pretty good oh good but it was 17 this is too much it's all too much yeah but anyway blue bottle is too much blue bottle is in that tier of price category that's what it was what it was it was all all this was this prelude was meant to say that, like, I still get sticker shock when I get a blue bottle.

I was like, I can't believe I got two drinks and two pastries and I spent $30.

Yeah.

I had that feeling too.

A couple of woodwinds don't buy themselves, apparently.

I know, I know.

This guy plays a self-giant clarinet.

That's it's look, it's it's out of con.

I got two coffees, two small coffees, uh, the the uh the chocolate croissant and the and the avocado toast, which was cut in two, which made it kind of messy, by the way.

I think just keep keep it.

I don't need that.

Don't cut my avocado.

You like it?

No, no, I'm going wild because it's all coming back to the superb blue bottle avocado toast I had in San Francisco that almost served whole.

This one the other day was cut in half.

Interesting.

Two toasts, two coffees, and a croissant with tip, honey, almost $50.

That's unbelievable.

That's insane.

That is so much.

That's insane.

What are we doing here?

I will say the app is not crap.

The app is pretty easy to use, but Emma pointed this out.

Too many decision points, too many, too many, too much customization.

Like, you have you're going through like six to eight different dropdowns on an individual drink.

It's like, I don't need to make all these

confusing because there's so you could get the beans half caffeinated, but then there was also a caffeine level.

It was like, oh,

yeah, I had your order last night.

I was so confused reading it in the tab.

I was like, I'm going to have to figure, like, go check this order system.

I was doing it, I was doing it thing by, like, I was doing it, but I was putting it, listing it in the order it came.

Because it was like espresso beans, but like light caffeine.

And I was like, some of this feels contradictory, but I'm confused.

And then I like went to order it today.

And I was like, okay, this makes more sense.

But it's so, you have to click like seven things before you can order your coffee.

Yeah.

I feel like I also need to say, I like blue bottle coffee.

I do like their coffee.

And I will go to them and I get excited.

I perk up.

If I see them, you're traveling.

Huh.

I'm going to, I'm going to go to them before I go to other places.

Okay.

Yeah.

But you have a croissant problem.

Yeah.

But you got to get in the, you've got, you have to fix it.

I think it's more than than a croissant problem.

I think there's multiple issues with this place.

I'm sorry.

No, hey, I, I, I,

look, also, it's like an Apple store.

It should, there should be more.

Everything is like an Apple store now.

Can't we have some, can't we get some heart in there?

Can't I know, I know.

There's a thing I read about.

I can't remember the, the, the writer who coined this phrase.

I think it's called aesthetic convergence.

And it's basically just how, because everything is so tested now, because there's so much data in terms of customer preferences, we've reached a point where all the rough edges have been sanded off, and so much stuff just feels generic.

You see so many things that have the same font treatment for logos, so many stores that just have like an identical template.

So every car company has the same mid-size hybrid SUV.

It's all, everyone's making the same fucking shit.

Yeah.

And it's got, it gets really, it just gets really tedious.

It gets really boring.

Laugh with something that's not funny.

Yeah.

But I was like, they should start a sh

I was like, they should start a short.

They should start a shop called shit coffee.

And you go and

it's just shitty in there.

And it's, you know, and like, that was my, my big idea.

And again, I know that's not funny.

No, I liked it.

I liked it.

But also, if it was just shit coffee.

Yeah, yeah.

Fuck you.

Yeah, exactly.

Exactly.

What do you want?

And they throw the coffee in your face.

Yeah.

If you, you pay extra for that.

Yeah.

You want to use the bathroom?

No.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it's just kind of grimy and kind of ugly.

But it is, but it is true.

There's that, everything's, you know, it's like everything's a hospital.

Everything, like, you know, you could perform a surgery in these days.

Right.

If shit coffee, coffee really opened, it would be a little shit emoji over on a white background, like blue bottle.

Yeah.

No, no, my version is shit coffee.

And the shit is like in like

letters are off.

It's a crazy font.

Like it's an ugly font.

Like it's like not, it's like actually not cool.

It's not hip.

Yeah.

I love it.

You go in there and Quale's just hanging out.

I would feel more comfortable in shit coffee.

I'd rather go to shit coffee.

I'd rather go to shit coffee.

Shit coffee.

And then it says, the coffee's good.

Coffee's actually pretty good.

That's the thing about shit coffee.

They're assholes.

Yeah.

It takes forever.

It's cheap.

I mean, look, I can tell that this is a quality coffee.

Yeah.

But I don't think that's it.

But at what cost?

Well, at what cost?

That's kind of a part of it.

Let's get to our final thoughts on blue bottle coffee.

So, Kate, here's how this will work.

We'll each go around and we will give this a score.

First, give our thoughts, like closing argument, if you will, on this chain based on this experience, but also previous experiences, and then end by giving it a score from zero to five forks.

Uh, Kate, you're our guest.

We'll begin with you.

Okay, so I've said this, I'm going to say it again.

I like blue bottle coffee.

Gun to my temple.

That is my final answer.

I like it.

I think it's a good one.

I hope you're never in that scenario.

I pray.

Those are my final words.

But

I think it's a dependable place for a cup of coffee.

I feel disappointed by the pastries.

Yeah.

Yes.

Fork score for me.

I'm going to be generous.

I think it's still a four-fork situation because the coffee.

Oh, no.

No, I'm saying.

You don't want to sleep.

No, no, no.

I'm taking it back.

Three, five.

Wow.

Half a fork.

Yeah, you can do that.

And the bottom half.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

So not even any time.

Not the top.

Just part of just the handle.

Just the handle.

That's without the flare.

Wow.

that's almost impossible to eat yeah you could that's a that's a useless impact it's a symbolic gesture the half at a coffee shop you could use it to stir i'm thinking it would have some functionality and i'll go back i've been and i'll go back yeah three and a half three and a half works uh mitch what do you think look it's a coffee shop at the end of the day it is it's a it's a it's it's it's a coffee shop and i and i do think it is quality like the coffee i can tell it's good coffee And look,

W, what's his name?

James,

W.C.

Fields.

Oh, W.

James Hinman is up here again.

W.

James.

I do not care about the Jiffy Luke guy, the guy who sold nursing homes.

Yes.

W.

James Freeman, I know that you're going to play me a little sob story with your clarinet.

No, here we go.

Not how you hold it.

There you go.

There you go.

That's better.

I don't want to hear the sob story.

You're a multi-millionaire at this point.

I know

your place looks nice.

For me, I felt out of place.

I didn't like walking in there.

Yeah.

But I mean, that's most places, I guess.

I don't feel comfortable in a lot of places.

But

shit coffee, however.

Shit coffee, I would feel great at.

And I would look good in shit coffee.

Blue bottle,

I just, there's something about it that's so sterile.

It's just a sterile place.

It's not sexy, I'll tell tell you that much.

And I'm

keep going.

Intelligentsia, I am, I like intelligentsia, but I also would have a coffee at Intelligentsia that was like really, really good.

I love pastries.

And good pastries.

And this, the food I had was not good.

Yeah.

The food, and then we also got overnight oats, which was, what was it called?

It was mushroom brand was mush.

So this was just the thing you can like get at Target that they're reselling.

Glyphosate, I assume.

Oats soaked to the brim with glyphosate?

I'm not sure.

I didn't check the ingredient list.

Well, it wouldn't be listed.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

It would have to say and no glyphosate on it.

No glyphosate.

There's no way.

Wait, this is a thing they can get away with not including on the ingredient list?

Are you kidding me?

I'll go to America.

The oats are seeped in glyphosate, and that's part of why we can't be doing oat milk regularly and that and the palm oil.

What is glyphosate?

It's Roundup.

It's like what they spray.

Oh, no.

Yeah, it's really bad.

And oats are coated.

You got to do the research and find the glyphosate-free oats, guys.

It's too exhausting.

I just can't, I can't be police.

No tea for you.

I'm gonna do everything I put in my body.

It's too much.

Mush would do that to us.

Even Mush, the Mush brand.

I'm sorry.

Mush can reach out, but Mush, I think there's a glyphosate.

I hope they don't.

Well, they do have little quotes inside the caps of Mush.

Success is not final.

Failure is not fatal.

Which got me more mad.

I didn't like that at all.

I was condescending.

It was condescending.

See that on Instagram over like a photo of Marilyn Manson.

Sorry.

Sorry,

I met Marilyn Monroe.

Marilyn Manson also works, though.

That's really surprising the mush because it's like they, they know you're a loser if you're eating it or something.

Do you know what I'm saying?

They're like, they're like, we know you're having a hard time.

Like, it's rude.

We're all freaks now in the dope show over a picture of Marilyn Monroe.

That's good.

I feel like it's not fair that I'm kind of like, I don't want to like this place, but I do recognize that the drinks are good.

They're not,

they have quality drinks.

The staff was very nice to me,

but I can't, I'm going three forks.

I can't, I can't, I can't.

Wow, that's high.

I would have expected you to go lower.

I thought the issue is, is that I know that the coffee is good.

I don't like coffee, but I know that it's quality coffee.

It just is like, I don't know.

It's just, it's just, it was just, I mean, I could have gone two and a half, but I'm just trying to be fair.

I like, I feel like I don't like this score.

Yeah, three is fair.

Uh, here's the thing: oh, here we go.

I think this, I think it's pretty simple regarding blue bottle coffee.

And I think he basically pointed out: coffee's good, food is bad.

There's, there's just like that, if you want to get a cup of coffee, an expensive cup of coffee,

blue bottle, where are the blue bottles?

It's more just like the logo.

Is that your issue?

Yeah, you want to see physical blue bottles.

Yeah, why not have a blue bottle?

You might be able to get some Tugo stuff in a blue bottle.

All right, well, then that.

But I don't know.

Okay.

It's more just their branding.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

Let's go on.

I don't think you should get hung up on that.

I was going to say that Intelligencia was mentioned.

La Columbus or La Columb was not mentioned, but that's another coffee place across the street.

Yeah.

What's that?

You did mention La Columb.

I apologize.

La Columb, another chain that is like the same sort of like to me.

If there was a there was a blue bottle where there's the La Calam, I'd just go there for my coffee.

You know what I mean?

Like, I just like to me, that's the same.

These are lateral moves, and the workers over there are great, and they're really nice, but like all these places are just kind of the same to me.

Would you go Intelligentsia before the other two?

This is interesting.

Yeah, La Colombo, Intelligentsia, blue bottle.

Where do you go?

Where do you go?

Which one are you going to?

Well, I think I just change it up every day.

I think I will go to Intelligentsia.

I guess probably Intelligentsia, but also like I just.

I'm actually going La Colombia.

Maybe I go to La Colombe.

I don't know.

They're all the same to me.

Like, I don't care.

I like the draft latte on tap.

Oh, yeah.

Black and tan at Colbert at La Colombo.

That sounds good.

I think if you think of like a, you know, like a Starbucks is maybe like, I'm just trying to

compare, comp them to retailers.

So maybe that's like a Walmart.

Maybe like a coffee bean is more like a Target.

Maybe like a Pete's is more, you know, in kind of that range.

Then Blue Bottle and all these places are all kind of aspiring to be like a Nordstrom or Blumendale's, right?

It's like a little bit of a nicer tier, a little bit more expensive, a little bit more of a premium.

But I don't think the quality necessarily is like.

all that justifies the price.

It's just what happens to be in certain gentrified neighborhoods.

And so if that's what the option is, if it's a blue bottle, I'm fine with it.

The coffee's fine.

I'll just avoid the food.

But yeah, I think I give all these places the same score.

I'm going to give Blue Bottle, which is three forks.

It's just right down the middle.

It's trying to give you a cup of coffee and it's doing it.

It's charging too much for it, but you know what?

I'm not upset about the quality at the end of the day.

So I don't know.

I also like another thing in their favor.

You know, because Nestle,

its owner, corporate owner, is fucking an evil extractive corporation.

They're horrible.

We have to point that out or else people will yell at us.

Steve?

What?

You're not talking about Steve Wynn, are you?

Okay.

Steve Wynn is great.

Privatize water.

Yeah, they're awful.

But the thing I was going to say is all of

their drink containers are compostable, which I do like.

They don't have single-use black Nestle.

Yeah.

No, not Nestle, at Blue Bottle.

Oh, yeah.

No, no,

that's true.

Three forks.

I don't know.

It's not exciting.

I'm sorry we didn't have an exciting thing to talk about.

Would you like to apologize?

Would you like to apologize to Duncan, though, now that we have you here?

I never was there, and it was a lie.

Wow.

Thank you.

All right.

Hey, that was our review of Blue Bottle Coffee.

It's time for a segment.

I've got some food-related jingles, and Mitch and Kate must determine which year they came out.

It's another edition of Jingle All the Way, spelled W-H-E-Y.

So, Kate, here's how this will work.

I will show a commercial with a jingle, and then you will each take turns guessing which year.

W-H-E-Y was the best we ever came up with.

Jingle was W-E-I-G-H, and then someone changed it to W-H-E-Y, and then we came there from that canonically.

Here are the rules: Jingle Alloay,

A-L-O-E for another food thing.

That's pretty good.

That's pretty good.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay, I like that as an all.

You know, you'll mention it from Aaron Opleton.

Here are the rules.

The closest guess without going over wins a point.

If you guess the year exactly, you get two points.

This is the Arden Marine rule.

If the game ends in a tie, the guest wins.

So tie goes to the guest, Kate.

That's to your benefit.

That's the Mitch Kenna rule.

And if the second guesser can guess a movie from the first guesser's year correctly, they get an extra point.

You can do that once per match.

That's the Murder Brian rule.

I'm not going to do well.

Okay.

I just want to say that now.

No, you're going to do great.

Today's theme is Long John Silver's Jingles.

So these are from the chain Long John Silver.

Do you ever have Long John Silver's?

Never.

It's pretty bad.

Cool.

A franchise where I don't think I've ever seen a commercial franchise.

The bazooka.

Have you guys done BJs?

Obviously.

We have done BJ's.

We've done BJ's once.

I've been meaning to go back.

Love the bazooka.

Used to go wild in high school at bazooki.

The bazooki is very good.

It's a home run.

My favorite chain restaurant dessert.

It's very good.

Absolutely.

It's so good.

Okay, these are as always compiled by the Drop King Robert Persinger.

Thanks, DK.

All right, first up,

this ad is called Three for the Money.

Three for the Money.

Long John Silver's three for the Money.

Shrimp, fish, and chicken.

Three for the money in one special dinner.

Big shrimp, crispy fish, tender chicken, plus hush puppies, fries, and fresh coleslaw.

Shrimp, fish, and chicken.

Three for the money at one special price.

Long John Silvers, three for the money.

Shrimp, fish, and chicken special.

This is.

Oh,

I think that's just whatever it was coming.

Whatever the next ad is.

I think I'm in love.

Who is that beautiful lady?

No idea.

So, dude, she's probably a freaking grandma right now.

Yeah.

Well, hey, that may be an indicator for what year this came out at.

Mitch, do you want to go first or second?

Well, it's up to our guest.

I'll let our guests decide.

Okay, and you can alter it.

So I'll go second.

You'll go second.

All right, Mitch.

What do you think?

Not a freak.

A lot of clues.

Definitely four by three aspect ratio.

It looked like it was transferred off of VHS.

Yes.

See, I'm not a guy, so I don't know about that stuff.

I told you I wasn't going to do well.

Guys, we love this shit.

We love aspect ratios.

Casey, what's your favorite aspect ratio?

I'm a 4-3 guy.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, shit.

The whale was 4-3.

Pretty cool.

I feel like it's more cinematic now because we're used to these HDTVs.

Yeah.

It's great for close-ups of faces.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, the Black Crush, Crush Blacks.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, the Crush Blacks and the

Blu-ray edition.

Pretty good.

Okay, I have an idea of the year for this.

Let me just mouth what I was going to say.

Just in case.

Okay.

Are you seeing it?

I'm going to try not to pay attention to this.

I can see in your eyes that it's wrong.

I got, I got, because I was like,

I'm trying to just, I'm going to be bad at this, I'm going to bad at this.

And then I went, what if I nail it?

So I wanted you to privately know if I had nailed it, but I'm playing by the rules.

I just want to agree with that that Wager's dead eyes mean nothing.

You could have nailed it perfectly.

Okay.

You should do a podcast about these eyes.

A long-running podcast.

Turn around behind you.

Is it there?

It's right over Wager's shoulder.

Oh, it is.

Any man's dead eyes single.

Okay, okay.

We gotta get him on.

All right, here we go.

I think my thought, my initial thought was 1980.

And that's what Kate said.

Blowing up a spot.

I was like, that's what Kate said.

But I always think that it's a couple years later than you think it is.

Yeah.

Also, by the way, it wasn't, honestly, that food looked pretty good.

I just was saying crunchy.

I was, it was gross the way they were just handling the food more so

and the chicken bite after the it just was just kind of weird and they're separating shrimp and fish confusion yes it was yeah it was it was confusing and kind of strange 1980 honestly it's because it feels it's that early it's that early 80s almost 70s vibe that it's giving me

but i'm gonna say 1982 because i feel like it's always so much that was my year wow 1982 1982 is the guess.

God cock.

That was really going to be my year.

That's.

Because I watch it.

I go 82.

And I, and then I, just to peel back and give you the breakdown of what I was thinking.

And then I went down to 80.

You're saying 82.

I'm going to go 80.

80 is good, but here.

Oh, it's.

If you said 1983, you get everything after 83.

Or if you say 1960, you'd get everything.

See, this is a thank you.

Yeah, there's some strategy there.

You don't get the rule.

I mean, the rule is.

Seems like they shut me down.

To be fair, it's a bad rule that Weiger won't change.

The thing is, if you said 1983, you would have overshot it, but you actually ended up getting a point here because it came out in 1981.

Oh, my God.

1981.

I kind of know that.

What does that mean?

You got a point.

No, because Mitch went over.

It's whoever got closest without going over.

Can you guess a movie?

To get a bonus point, can you guess a movie?

No,

can you guess a movie to get 1981?

I won't be able to do.

From 1981.

From 1981.

Oh, I mean, the...

Wait, do I have to guess it from 1980 or 1981?

No, 1981, because it came out in...

Wait, hold on.

From the year that she guessed.

So he would have to pick a movie from 1980, even though the commercial came out in 80.

Emma's correct.

That's how the murder Brian Rural was.

I'm trying to make up the name of a movie.

1982, E.T.

came out.

So two years before E.T.

1980.

1980.

I got one.

I got to guess.

You got one in your head?

I'm not going to say what it is.

I think I'm right.

I can't think of that ever.

1980.

This is so.

79, I'd have one.

78 and 77, I'd have one 1980 is honestly hard for me

I can't tell you any any date that any movie was ever made I'm not kidding.

I just yeah I'm not great at like

79 is alien, right?

You also bitch you can say you don't have to do it take a guess now you can wait till later because this is the thing you can do once per game.

Okay, 1980 is

wait no

wait a minute.

Is 1980?

It's not.

It's not Empire Strikes Back, is it?

Is this your guess?

Empire Strikes Back.

Look at his eyes.

There's a smile.

Mitch gets a point.

Yes.

Number one at the box office.

Number two, 9 to 5.

That was a 1980 movie.

Number three, Stir Crazy.

Number four, Airplane.

Number five, any which way you can.

Oh, of course.

Which I feel like has kind of been memory hold.

That was a Clint Eastwood movie.

Looks like things are all tied up right now.

All right, Mitch gets a point.

But now you can't do that again the rest of the match.

Wait, I can't do it again.

No, you get to do it once.

Oh, so each of you gets to try it once.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Right, because you're going to guess opposite.

Kate will guess first.

Right.

It's like a lifeline.

You use it and you lose it.

Can we still just do it for fun?

All right, fine.

You can keep doing it.

All right, that's fine.

Next up.

This is you're going to get your wish.

Huh?

So the time hits me.

Chicken sounds good.

I hit for long john.

Something tells me I should.

199.

I hear a voice say, Chicken at Long Johns will blow you away.

And what am I thinking?

Am I in outer space?

Can the world's best chicken be at a fish place?

And the voice said, Chicken at Long jobs is just a thing.

So many choices, those taste buds will sing.

So I stopped at the sign, couldn't believe my eyes.

Got the $1.99 fish, chicken, and fries.

So if you're thinking chicken, you gotta go fish.

Long jobs, you gotta fish.

Thinking chicken, you gotta,

by the way,

who is hot?

I'm not sure.

I don't know who that is.

Okay.

This might be a star is born.

If you're thinking chicken, you gotta go fish.

That was,

it didn't make sense, really.

Really confusing.

Definitely, like, you know, there's a, there's some clues on the wardrobe, I feel like.

Heard clues, very much so, also, like the early, you know, corporate hip-hop parody.

Like, they've got like, all right, don't tip it too much.

I'm just saying, like, there's some, there's some stuff that maybe time stamps.

I kind of want to go wild and pick a date.

Well, you only have to pick a year.

You can go specific if you want.

Early March.

I'm going to go 1993.

1993 is the year.

Mitch,

what do you think?

I thought it was earlier than 93, but now I don't even, now I don't know what to think.

This reminds me very much of like...

No, now I know that it's 89.

So keep going.

That was truly where my head was at, was like maybe right before the 90s.

It's very much like a Clarissa explains it all sort of vibe that I'm getting from this.

Oh, good comp.

Yeah.

I'm a fool.

I went to, I got, I got excited.

93.

You might, you maybe nailed it, which you get two points if you do.

but

i'm gonna say 1989

and that i you know it but in what world if that's it i won too

okay that's fair

not actually but 1989 is before when this ad came out in the year 1993 kate gets it exactly gets two points

two points two points

Wow, to think I was disparaging myself, I won't be able to do it right.

Nailing it every time.

Yeah, you're doing great.

Washington, guess the movie from 1989?

What's that?

Can you guess a movie from 1989?

Oh, your guest 1989.

Wait, you're challenging me?

Yeah.

1989 in film.

Do the right thing.

Batman.

Batman.

I think those are both 89s.

Yeah.

All right.

I'll look it up.

Next up, this one is called We Want to See You Happy and C is spelled S-E-A.

They're obsessed with the ocean.

They really are.

We want to see your eyes when you see our shrimp.

At Long John Silver's, we want to see you sink your teeth into our food.

Like our six-piece shrimp dinner and our shrimp and fish dinner.

You see, we want to make sure we're going to see you back.

Shrimp meals, $3.99 each.

We want to see you happy.

I really do want to encourage anyone who normally just listens to this podcast to check out the YouTube feed, at least for this segment, because I think these commercials are really fascinating time capsules.

Yeah.

Yes.

But also, it seems like what they're trying to do there is almost be like we're like Red Lobster.

Come get a plate of shrimp at a restaurant.

Come dine in and enjoy your sit-down experience, which is very foreign to Long John Silver's.

I mean, this in the nicest way possible.

The man who's in that commercial, I miss seeing people like that on television.

It's like

this guy, right?

Here he is, right here.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

Yeah, yeah.

Peter's Lord.

Look at that guy.

That is a screen grab right here of this guy putting a shrimp into his mouth.

Yeah.

He's definitely intentionally messing up the take so he can do it over and over again.

We can make that the.

And he's formally trained.

You can tell.

We can make that the podcast art for this episode.

Just a one-off.

This is, I mean, look, this.

I'm going to just say it right off the bat.

This is an 80s commercial once again.

This is not 70s.

Yeah, you're going first this time.

And by the way, we're both correct.

Batman and Do the Right Thing both in 1989.

1989.

Perfect.

This is an 80s commercial.

Also, hey, but I think this is before Batman or Do the Right Thing came out.

I have a year.

I have a year as well.

Interesting.

And I think it's the Red Sox are playing in the World Series.

It's 1986.

That was exactly 86.

You can't see inside my brain, so you don't know if I'm a liar, but I'm not.

And I had 86.

That was my year.

86.

I believe you.

The Celtics win the championship.

Red Sox playing for the World Series.

Yeah.

Big year in Boston.

The ball goes between Buckner's legs.

That's what happens.

I wasn't born yet, so I don't know what was going on.

Wow.

We're so we're very old, it turns out.

Yeah.

Well, what are you going to do?

I knew it was 86.

You knew it was, you felt like it was 1986, but 1986 was taken.

What's your guess?

You could go 87.

I'm going higher.

You are going higher to 1988.

Now, here's the thing: 1987.

I don't know this strategy might be the safer pick because then you can, you can, if it is 1987 and it's 1988, you whiff it.

The thing is, it is exactly 1988, so you get two points again.

What the fuck?

You are running away with it.

Hell.

Five to one.

Absolutely.

This

really rules.

Yeah.

This sucks for me.

It's great for you.

Mitch, you want to guess a 1988 movie?

A 1988 movie, a year before Batman.

I'm going to say arachnophobia.

Oh, arachnophobia.

I feel like that was 90s, but I could be wrong.

Fuck, you're right.

No, I could be wrong.

Let me look at it.

No, no, you're right.

The witches.

That feels early, but maybe I'm wrong.

1988 film.

Can you believe the way I'm winning?

No, I'm devastated.

I don't know if anyone's ever gotten that many right on the money.

That's like

that's pretty good.

It's ruining my day.

I'm astonished with myself.

The witches, the original witches, not the Zemekis remake, was 1990.

Damn.

Okay, next up, there is a movie that we covered on the blank check podcast.

It's an 88.

It's a big one.

It's a big boy.

It's another Zemekis.

Uh, what?

All right, let's look at this next one.

This is called Rap Thing.

You've never had anything, anything like this.

Okay,

Long John's Rap.

Rap thing over wild thing.

So was it?

Whoa,

chicken, shrimp, or fish.

All right, the writers come out from this guy.

Thank you for getting stereotypes.

Wrapped up with all kinds of fresh stuff.

Offer just $1.99 for

$199.

Take a fresh look at Long John Silver's.

I think I love you.

Those really look like they sucked.

Those did not look good at all.

Those didn't look that good.

No, I agree.

Did you guys sign California chicken cafe?

Obviously, we have not reviewed it.

We have not reviewed it.

You couldn't have come back.

Yeah.

All right, we'll come back.

We'll do triple-C.

I've never had it.

Or I haven't had it in years, rather.

I've had it.

I've had it in years.

I'm sure you want to come back.

I want to come back.

I've had it too many times, and it's kind of just whatever.

But, you know.

Yeah.

But I hate it.

Gets a job done.

Someone recently was talking about it, and it sounded good.

I got confused.

You know, last time I had it, it was hidden.

Well, shit.

All right, well, we'll

cover it.

Robert Zemeckis 88.

Just tell me what it was.

We did a podcast episode about it with our friends, Sims, and

who framed Roger Rabbit.

That's right.

Who framed Roger Rabbit?

What about

Arachnophobia wrong?

Arachnophobia.

Oh, shit.

I'm going to figure it out.

94.

I'm going to give you two points if Arachnophobia came out.

That's fucking crazy.

I don't know what.

She's winning 4-1.

5-1.

Maybe that's going to be 70.

Girls rule.

Arachnophobia was 1990.

Okay, next up.

Oh, wait, wait, we didn't guess on rap thing.

Who's going first?

I forgot.

Went first last time.

Kate's going first.

Okay, Kate, you're going first.

Your guess.

96.

1996 is your guess.

Great, great guess.

There's definitely an indication because Wild Thing was back in the zeitgeist because of Major League, the movie.

I'm so bummed out because 96 is the perfect guess.

I think 97 is too late.

Yeah.

There's a friends vibe to that babe who was selling these wraps.

She was very much.

She looked like she was like a Monica or something.

Yep.

Or, yeah, Monica.

The overalls.

The overalls.

Yeah.

I'm going to say.

Oh, yeah, that's a good call.

I'm going to say, I'm going to just be safe here and say 1990 because then I'll get from 1990 to 1996 and hope that it was 95 or something.

Yeah, Mitch, you played it safe and it paid off because you did go before the date in question, which is 1996 exactly.

Oh my God.

This is insane.

This is insane.

Truly affordable.

This has never happened to me.

This has never happened to us playing this game either.

You said you were dying of these sorts of things.

You were knocking it out of the park.

96 was a great guess.

It was a great guess.

That is what I would have said as well.

I think you nailed it perfectly.

Can you guys believe this?

I honestly can't.

I'm gobsmacked.

It's like your beloved Boston Celtics running through last year's NBA playoffs.

Let me just say this.

I'm pretty good at this game.

You are pretty good at this game.

And getting stomped like this is crazy.

You're kicking my ass.

We have

one left.

This one is called Chillers.

I mean, it's a runaway now.

What is that?

Eight to

one.

Seven to one.

God feels good.

Here it goes.

What would you say to a chilled salad with oceans of seafood?

Sounds good to me.

There's a new chiller at Long John Silver's, our ocean chef's salad.

It's a chef's salad with oceans of seafood, shrimp, and combinations of white fish, crab, and lobster.

Sounds new.

Sounds light.

You'll get a chill with everybody.

Long John Silver.

Chillers.

Sounds good to me.

Okay, that looks like shit.

That looks awful.

That looks the worst of any seafood.

Cold Sifu says, yeah, that does not look good.

By the way, you're a piece of shit when you did that whole thing of with Kate.

I forgot to say this to you.

What?

Where you're like, Mitch, you did play it safe, but then it was all to say Kate won.

You're a piece of shit.

That was really good.

You were a showman.

You were a showman.

Because I gave up.

I went, oh, I didn't get that one.

Oh, wow.

It fucking pissed me off.

And I got to get it right this time.

I can't let you do this.

I can't let you pull this off.

Okay.

What year did the chillers ad come?

1984.

Mitch is guessing 1984.

Oh, God, is it 86?

1984 is the guess.

It's funny because

I have a feeling.

We're almost there, but I'm going to say 1985.

I have a feeling about that.

Okay, well, this will really piss me off off if you get it right this has been mitch yours your your advice strategically has been like you go like one above your price is right and you have every year in front of you yes um

which worked out amazingly in this case because it is exactly 1985.

oh my god

why

points

this is

an incredible day for me wow i'm gonna dance out of here what a run is this one of the best days of your life yeah to win like this to sweep congratulations is all i can say thank you wages movie from 1980 can you think of a movie from i'll give you from 1984 1985 and 1987 for no reason i get to guess three years where's the fifth element from 1990s

1997 maybe i don't know about that wow i'm way off is it 1997 Boy, it doesn't sound that late, but maybe.

I want to say 95 is fifth element.

Let's just try to guess fifth element, then we'll move on.

I'm gonna guess 95.

Casey, you got a guess on what year fifth element came out.

The effects are pretty good in it.

I want to go 98.

Yeah, and Chris Tucker's 98,

which is a thing.

Yeah,

gonna have to go 98.

Well, funny, if you assholes had listened to me, it was 1997.

It was 97.

Wow, okay.

Well, we're not going to guess the same year as you.

Yeah, I can get some stuff right on the fucking podcast.

Yeah, I know, all right.

Funny.

He doesn't get to guess every point.

Rich gets two points for getting the right year of August.

Fifth Element.

Doesn't matter.

Hey, just like a restaurant value feedback, let's look at the feedback.

Today's email is from Matt.

Matt writes: I recently got my wife a lot of sauces for her Mother's Day present.

I got her burger sauce, French fry sauce, chicken.

Happy Mother's Day.

I got you a bunch of sauces.

I'm fucking dumbass listeners.

The wrapping's wet because I've wrapped up sauces.

Oh, thank you.

I've got to fly to Milan for my runway show, but thank you.

We have dumb listeners who have like attractive smart wives.

Barbecue sauce and some of the Chick-fil-A sauces.

My question to y'all is: what is your most favorite food-related gift you've ever given or received?

Thanks for all the years of laughs.

Love y'all to pieces.

Shout outs to Emma and Jemmy.

Wow.

Dacey, I guess you can go fuck yourself.

And us, too.

I do remember a specific, I think I've talked about it on the podcast before.

Yeah.

Flashback.

It is 1990.

I don't know what came out a year after Batman.

Yeah.

Goodfellows came out.

I am

I've just received my first communion.

I'm now officially a Catholic boy.

And

Catholic man, I thought.

Catholic man, I guess, at this point.

I'm getting first communion.

People are coming and they're giving me like shitty gifts.

My auntie Masha comes.

Aunt Masha, I love you.

And she brings me a happy meal.

That's great.

Burger fries, happy meal.

It fucking ruled.

I just remember being like, this is awesome.

I'm like such a boring day.

You know what I mean?

Like, and it was, it was, it was fantastic.

And it's, it stuck with me now for 30 years.

Exactly what you want.

That's awesome.

Exactly what I want.

It was, it, it ruled.

I did use that first communion money to buy the Super Nintendo likes.

Very exciting.

Yeah.

Wait, that can't have been the same.

Maybe it was 1989.

What year of the Super Nintendo is?

Oh, I think it's 1964.

You know, it's not the year show,

but honestly, it could be.

That seems like what we're dealing with a lot here.

I don't know if the year show has legs.

And I'm winning.

You're doing great.

Yeah, you're not hung out of the park.

You're thriving.

I guess that's kind of what, what was that?

The dateline used to do the year thing a lot.

I don't know if you remember that from coming back from commercial breaks.

Andy Rooney or something.

Yeah, it was guest of the year, and they'd have like a bunch of different clues about world events.

Yeah.

I told you on the sad side of stuff, a lot of edible arrangements for when my dad died.

Yeah.

They went nutty with the edible arrangements.

Right.

How are those?

Fantastic.

Really?

Is it only?

Because I had three or four more dads.

It's not, is it really just fruit?

It's, it's, there's like sometimes chocolate-covered pineapple.

That's cool.

And like, they put them in the shape of flowers.

We got a ton of edible arrangements.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

So a food-related gift.

Kate does anything come to mind?

You know, I got one not too long ago, a couple of years ago for my birthday.

A friend sent me via Gold Belly, I believe, that service.

I'm not affiliated with them at all.

From is it Jones Bakery?

What's the famous Tom Cruise coconut cake?

We had the coconut cake in a recent episode back in September with our buddy Drew McQueenie.

We liked it quite a lot.

I have to say something.

She sent it to me.

It was so delicious.

It was like, I was like, it was one of the best cakes I'd ever had.

I talked it up so much.

I got it maybe the following year.

It wasn't as good.

Oh, no.

Like, I got it dud or something.

And it was really, because the one I had was transcendent.

I'm glad that you had a great one too.

So I don't know what happened.

Hey, it happens.

You know, the baker's asleep that day or whatever.

Yeah, everyone has an off night.

Yeah.

I'm trying to think of a

great gift.

That episode we did way back in September, which we recorded four days ago.

Yeah, yeah.

But that's when we had it.

We had it four days ago, basically.

It was good.

It was really good.

Drew had put it in his freezer, so we had it.

We had it.

It was frozen.

I had it frozen.

I had it fresh out of the package and frozen, ate it later.

It was amazing.

Okay.

I'm starving.

Sorry, we will get you out of here.

I'm trying to.

I'm trying to think of food-related gifts.

I'm sure.

I mean, now he's gotten me like just like an in-and-out gift card before, which is nice.

That goes to good use.

I'm trying to think of.

I've gotten good hot sauces.

I mean, I've gotten, I definitely have gotten a lot of nice gift cards of food.

And I know that I've gotten also like actual food gifts and I'm blanking.

The one's like Flyby James, you know, sauce trio.

The story I'm thinking of that this made me think of is when I was sleeping over at my friend's house for, and it was Easter weekend.

And so the next day was Easter Sunday.

And so we had like, the mom was like, hey, write out gift bags, meet a couple other kids.

Write out your name on a gift basket.

Slept over for Easter Sunday?

Yeah, what's crazy about that?

The swordfish had just come out.

It was the Saturday night leading into the Sunday for Easter Sunday.

I was going to go see my family, but it was like, I don't know, it was just a fucking weekend.

Yeah.

That's not crazy, right?

No, it's just a holiday.

So I'm surprised by it.

That's all.

Anyway, so

my friend's mom was like, put your name on an Easter basket and we'll fill it.

We'll give you candy in the morning.

So we'd have candy.

So so, it was gonna get double candy.

I agreed, and I made up some fake kids, and so I wrote Marker on a couple of other extra baskets just to see what would happen.

And you know what?

They were filled with candy.

Oh my god, the trickster.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So there were like three of us.

We got like five kids' worth of candy, and the mom didn't really check out.

Yeah, the resurrection of Jesus Christ.

That's what you decided to do.

I committed a sin.

But you know what?

Feels good to sin.

Wow.

Getting an extra chocolate bunny.

Nick, how was a place this weekend you might like?

Sin City, it's called.

If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at feedback at birdfuck.com or leave us a voicemail at 830-GODO.

That's 830-463-6844.

And to get the Doughboys double our weekly bonus episode, plus our entire pre-2018 back catalog, subscribe at patreon.com/slash Doughboys.

Our producer is Emma Erdbrink.

Our associate producers, Amelia Marino, our engineer is Casey Donahue, and our video editor is Mike Dorfman.

Kate Burland, thanks so much for being here.

Oh, thank you.

It was so fun.

I want to give a shout out to Eric and Anthony, who are huge fans of the show.

Wow.

Wow.

And I had a blast, and I won so much.

You really did.

You dominated

this edition of Jingle All the Way.

I feel like we need to add a new rule or give some sort of like...

A Burland rule.

The Burland rule.

Yeah.

Some sort of honorific.

I would really love that.

You know, I think what we'll do is we'll have you be, you have the record for most points.

Oh, wait, when I tell you, my heart just started beating really fast.

Because of this exciting or the coffee.

It's both.

But they gave me a real, that felt really good.

I've never had anything like that.

This is the Jingle All the Way Hall of Fame wages.

Kate Burlant, the first

inductee.

Inductee.

Huge honor.

We're going to have to have you come back with John and Claudia where you guys would just dominate the hell out of Nick and I.

Yeah, heartbeat.

I just won't show up.

Yeah.

Do you have a, do you have anything you'd like to plug?

No.

Who'd you give shout outs to?

Again, I give a shout out to Eric and Aunt Nee.

Eric and Aunt Nee.

Hi, thanks for listening.

We're the Doughboys.

Thank you.

We're the Doeboys.

You don't have to talk to them like they're in the room.

They're going to be listening and watching.

I love it.

Hi, thank you for watching.

Thank you.

We're the Dough Boys.

That's Mitch.

And that's Wise.

And together, we're the Dough Boys.

The Doughboys.

Okay.

Hey, thanks so much for being here.

Thank you.

See you next time.

See you next time.

See you next time.

That'll do it for this episode of Dough Boys.

And then the next time for the Spoon Man, make a bitch.

Oh, I'm Nick Wager.

Happy Eating.

See ya.

Hey, buddy.

Want Dough Boys merch?

We're talking hats, shirts, sweatshirts, patches, glasses, all sorts of stuff, aprons.

It's all available at kinshipgoods.com/slash Doughboys.

That's kinshipgoods.com/slash Doughboys.

Sources for the intro are in the episode description.

That was a hit gum podcast.