Tiffany Haddish

Speaker 1 All right, cold mornings, holiday plans, endless to-do lists. I just want my wardrobe to be simple, Dana.
I just want pieces that look sharp, feel amazing. Makes sense, and I'll use every day.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? That's Quince. That's it.
The best part.

Speaker 1 Their pieces

Speaker 1 make effortless gifts.

Speaker 2 Also,

Speaker 1 this season, Quince nails it. $50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters that feel like a treat every day.

Speaker 1 Wool coats that are both stylish and built to last. Their denim fits perfectly.
It's nutty comfortable, all without the high-end price tag.

Speaker 1 By working directly with ethical factories and top artisans, Quince delivers premium quality while cutting out the middlemen. So you get luxury without the luxury markup.

Speaker 3 I've been living in their cashmere sweaters lately. They hold up beautifully even through holiday chaos.
And Quince isn't just clothes. They've got amazing options for home, bath, kitchen, and travel.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 I picked up a few for myself and a few to gift, and it's all stuff people actually love.

Speaker 1 Give and get timeless holiday staples that last this season with Quince. Go to quince.com/slash fly for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.
Now available in Canada, too.

Speaker 1 That's q-u-in-ce-e.com slash fly. Free shipping, 365-day returns.

Speaker 5 Quince.com/slash fly.

Speaker 6 Ready to level up?

Speaker 7 Chumba Casino is your playbook to fun.

Speaker 8 It's free to play with no purchase necessary.

Speaker 11 Enjoy hundreds of online social games like Blackjack, Slots, and Solitaire anytime, anywhere, with fresh releases every week.

Speaker 7 Whether you're at home or on the go, let Chumba Casino bring the excitement to you.

Speaker 10 Plus, get free daily login bonuses and a free welcome bonus.

Speaker 15 Join now for your chance to redeem some serious prizes.

Speaker 9 Play Chumba Casino today.

Speaker 13 No purchase necessary.

Speaker 6 VGW Group, Void War Prohibited by Law 21 Plus.

Speaker 16 TNCs apply.

Speaker 3 So Timphany Haddish is a uh fantastic guest to have on a podcast she's uh full of energy yeah a lot of funny stories laughing all the time and one of the highlights i mean she she will in this podcast break it down moment by moment what happened when she was arrested for being asleep i think in her tesla or something so I'd only anecdotally heard that.

Speaker 3 And the real story we get to hear, you'll get to hear on this podcast about what happened. And it's completely innocent.
It's not what you think it is. So, that's something to stay tuned for.

Speaker 1 It's a big story that got out there. And then, you know, she doesn't really talk about it, but she did talk about it.
She was a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 I've known her here and there throughout the years. And we asked her about Girl's Trip and how it sort of catapulted her to the next level of fame, which is a weird thing for people.

Speaker 1 And she will explain why it's weird. A lot of people don't know it.
They just say it's weird, but getting famous quickly,

Speaker 1 more rapidly, is very hard.

Speaker 3 Yes, and suddenly you're getting money. And again, you just learn, which is, you need to learn early on the difference between what you're told, like the gross amount and the net amount.

Speaker 3 It's not a complaint, it's just a reality. Oh,

Speaker 3 it kind of takes your breath away. And then also where she lives and where just a lot of people are interested in

Speaker 3 maybe getting alone and stuff like that, she talks talks all about personal stuff. She's just,

Speaker 3 she's very open about her life.

Speaker 2 And it's very likable. Very

Speaker 3 full of, very funny.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We laughed a lot.
I will say we did laugh a lot. She did crack me up.
And I'm glad she did it. And we just,

Speaker 1 I haven't seen her much lately. And it was just a great, you know, sometimes these are just good one hour hangouts with people.
And we hope you like hanging out the way we did.

Speaker 3 Yes. I was so punchy toward the end that everything she said started to make me laugh.

Speaker 2 It's just,

Speaker 3 she was just, struck me as a very funny person. And the first time I worked with her before she made it big, I thought, damn, she's, she should be a star.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, you talked about it. She opened for you somewhere.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 So here she is, Tiffany Haddish.

Speaker 2 Can I tell a nice Tiffany Haddish story right now? Yeah, we're going. We're going.
It's only 20 seconds. So, so we're doing the secret life of pets, you know, whatever, promoting it.

Speaker 2 We're going to watch a preview or something. So I'm there with family and my wife's nieces.
And her one niece sees Tiffany and flips out like starstruck. Can't believe it that she's there.

Speaker 2 And then my wife just sort of mentioned it, Tiffany, and Tiffany came over and gave Audrey. We have a picture of it, this gigantic bear hug and um

Speaker 2 it really is an indelible memory and it was so cool to hear about that that did not shock me it was nice it was just when you hear stuff like that yeah it's very nice anyway that's my Tiffany Haddish story

Speaker 2 good story good story

Speaker 1 I'm still trying to hook these air pods up to this damn computer you know she's traumatized by this situation because oh you have to do tech i like when people like to hear this part because stars are just like us.

Speaker 2 You're a star.

Speaker 2 I am?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, no. No, I guess.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I guess we all know.

Speaker 17 People know who you are. They even know who you are in Africa, bro.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 2 You are huge in Cameroon. Huge.

Speaker 1 Is there a funny bone down there? I'll go down there and play.

Speaker 17 Not that I know of.

Speaker 1 Oh, I don't know where to do stand-up down there, but I'll go. I'll go.
I don't go anywhere unless I'm famous. There's no way.
Why would I go?

Speaker 1 But the name of my special should be,

Speaker 1 They're just like us.

Speaker 2 They're just like us. They're just like us.
How about I'm just like you?

Speaker 1 I know, but that doesn't really hit the ear.

Speaker 2 Well, it's a little self. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because in Us magazine, they always say, Tiffany Haddish was buying grocery. They're just like us.

Speaker 2 I'm like, well, yeah,

Speaker 1 that's what we all do.

Speaker 2 Do you remember the song Too Legit to Quit?

Speaker 17 Yes, Too legit too legit

Speaker 2 who did that hey

Speaker 2 hey hey

Speaker 17 so what can't you do now i know you can sing that's hammer i know you can you didn't know i have i have songs that are out like i'm on i'm streaming on spotify and apple

Speaker 2 All right, let's start with that. We got our research.
They didn't mention it. So what are you?

Speaker 2 i mean i could tell just by you doing that you could sing well i'm glad you could tell do how do your songs come about do you sit with someone and write them do you write them yourself in your head how are you well i just recently released the song with diane warren her and i we sat and rewrote songs uh She did most of the writing.

Speaker 17 I gave her the premise and what I want the songs to be about and why I want to make these types of songs. And so we got one that just came out called Woman Up,

Speaker 17 which I really think Kamala should have used in her campaign, but whatever.

Speaker 2 And then the campaign's still early. So

Speaker 2 she listens to this podcast. I'm sure.

Speaker 17 Well, Kamala needs to use the song Warmin Up.

Speaker 2 So you're song.

Speaker 17 That's inspiring, not just for women, but for men as well. You know, you can't just be sitting in the bed and being all depressed and sad.
You have to get up and get things done.

Speaker 1 I'm always telling Dana to woman up.

Speaker 2 Well, man,

Speaker 2 man up. Man up's been around quite a while.

Speaker 2 Yeah, let's get up. Woman up.
It was about a time. Man up, woman up.
And what will be the trifecta?

Speaker 2 And let's see.

Speaker 1 Diane Warren is a huge, huge, one of the best songers of all time.

Speaker 2 So she's sitting at the piano. You're sitting with her?

Speaker 17 No, it was just us in the studio just having conversations.

Speaker 2 Just having conversations. Okay.

Speaker 17 And then, and then I came back like two days later and she had three songs for me. One called Woman Up, another one called You're So Beautiful.

Speaker 17 And then another one called, I want you, but I want you gone.

Speaker 2 Can I ask you a question?

Speaker 2 Did she have

Speaker 2 a melody track that you sang to or did she have a scratch track? Or she just says, she just, you just started. How did you?

Speaker 17 Oh, well, when I came in the studio, she didn't have a scratch, like a scratch track, like a sample of the song.

Speaker 1 She went, does she want to hear you sing it all first? Just say, what do you got?

Speaker 17 No, she didn't do that to me.

Speaker 1 She didn't. How does she know you're any good, though?

Speaker 17 Um, probably because she came to some of my comedy shows, and much like you guys, I sing sometimes in my show, just little bits like, Hey, audience, how you doing?

Speaker 2 I can sing, I can't.

Speaker 17 I'll just randomly go,

Speaker 17 This is the song that doesn't end.

Speaker 2 Yes, it goes on and on, my friend.

Speaker 17 I'll do that one, or I'll hit them with skinny-marinky dinky-dink, skinny-marinky-do.

Speaker 2 I love

Speaker 2 you.

Speaker 2 Oh, you can hold that note.

Speaker 17 Skinny-marinky-do.

Speaker 2 I love

Speaker 2 you.

Speaker 2 I love you in the morning and in the afternoon. And I love you in the evening underneath the moon.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 17 skinny morinky dinky dink skinny morinky do

Speaker 2 i love you see you next time

Speaker 2 i

Speaker 2 love

Speaker 2 you too

Speaker 2 boop boop bee doo be do oh wow that's like my closer a little bit Yeah, that's like

Speaker 2 a 1930s kind of feel to it or 50s.

Speaker 17 Well, it was from 1980 something, 1970s from the LT show.

Speaker 1 Is it a real show song?

Speaker 17 Yeah, it's a real theme song to a TV show that I used to watch as a kid. And my mom said that that was our family theme song.

Speaker 17 And if somebody was to come pick us up from school, they have to sing that song.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's a great idea.

Speaker 2 Got it. Great idea.

Speaker 2 Our family

Speaker 2 theme song was, you're a loser.

Speaker 2 My mom said, you're a loser, baby.

Speaker 1 Just go. Just go with them.

Speaker 17 No, our other family theme song is, you can't win now.

Speaker 2 You can't break even and you can't get out of the game.

Speaker 2 You guys know that?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 17 Is it famous? Never saw The Wiz.

Speaker 2 Oh, The Wiz. Oh.
We just had Bowen Yang on, who's in the movie, isn't he?

Speaker 1 No? No. No, he's in the new one with Verian Grant.

Speaker 2 Wicked. Sorry.
Wicked.

Speaker 17 Wicked. No, I'm talking about The Wiz, the Black Boy.

Speaker 2 Oh, with Michael Jackson. Yeah,

Speaker 17 yes, yes, that's the song that he sang.

Speaker 2 Yes,

Speaker 2 who else was in that?

Speaker 17 Diana Ross,

Speaker 2 and who else? Okay,

Speaker 2 Nipsey Russell, ah, Nipsey Ross, yeah, or Nipsey Hustle. He was great.

Speaker 17 No, Nipsey Russell, not a hustle.

Speaker 2 That's

Speaker 2 a great stand-up.

Speaker 2 Yeah, Nipsey Russell.

Speaker 1 I used to laugh at Nipsey Russell on match game or something. He'd sing poems.
He'd say poems for answers.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 2 Roses all red.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he played

Speaker 17 man in that.

Speaker 2 And then he did.

Speaker 17 Jones was in it. And Richard Pryor was in the wiz.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's right.

Speaker 17 Richard Pryor was the wizard.

Speaker 2 You know, Dickie Pryor. The thing about Dick Pryor.

Speaker 1 Oh, he did a movie with him.

Speaker 2 I did do a movie.

Speaker 1 He's buddies with him.

Speaker 2 I did a movie with

Speaker 2 Dick.

Speaker 2 And the thing about Dickie Pryor,

Speaker 2 it's called Moving

Speaker 2 mid-late

Speaker 2 late 80s, and he's moving his family across. And I'm, I'm going to drive his car, and I'm a schizophrenic.
So I got to hang out with him.

Speaker 2 And, and the director said, Richard doesn't, he's not into it today. You know, can you get him going?

Speaker 2 I've only been at SNL one year. I'm like, I got to get Richard going.
So I was trying to get him

Speaker 2 to wake him up. You know, and then he's just, but he was so sweet.

Speaker 1 Tiffany, I auditioned for moving and didn't get it.

Speaker 1 And I was living in a house where Dana was living at the same house too. I was renting a room and I was like, hey, good for you.

Speaker 2 You know, I didn't know you auditioned. I was going to mix that part.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Dana.

Speaker 1 I was trying to get your scraps.

Speaker 2 Okay. So, Tiffany,

Speaker 2 how are you finding stand-up? Now, I just saw that you are on tour. Yep.

Speaker 2 Stand-up always. evolves.
It always changes as the person changes. So what is it like now when you come out

Speaker 2 and they go crazy? And then what's your, what's your, what are you feeling when you're out there now?

Speaker 17 I always feel like when they go crazy, when I come on stage, it's, it's wild because I still remember eight years ago when it would just be like five people that go crazy because

Speaker 17 that's the kind of following I had. Like, but the room would still be full, but it would be five people that know me, you know.

Speaker 17 Now everybody kind of knows who Tiffany Hannish is and they're like going bananas.

Speaker 2 I want to cry.

Speaker 17 I always feel the urge to cry. And then I say something kind of like wild to them so that I don't cry.

Speaker 17 And then that's going to keep clapping. And I'm like, stop it.
I'm going to get crying, guys.

Speaker 17 Because I believe crying is a removal of old beliefs and a replacement of new ones. And I always feel like the audience is going to hate my guts before I get on stage.

Speaker 17 And then like once once I touch, once my first foot touches the stage, then it's like, that doesn't matter anymore.

Speaker 2 Do you feel any pressure though? Because just I'll give you an example. If I'm trying to go to just a club to drop in and I just barely have notes, I'm working out.
And

Speaker 2 ladies and gentlemen, he better get fast in your comedy safety belts. Here she comes.
You know, it's like, there's Tiffany at it. You know, it's just like, ah.

Speaker 2 It feels like a lot of pressure. The bigger the room, you know, until you get the first laugh.

Speaker 2 It's the small rooms that feel like a lot of pressure.

Speaker 17 It's the rooms that you pop in and there's like six people there.

Speaker 17 That feels like a lot of pressure. It feels like direct judgment.
Because you can literally have a conversation with each one of those people in the room.

Speaker 1 It's very,

Speaker 1 there's something to those little small rooms and a lot of comics are on the road doing theaters.

Speaker 1 But there's definitely something different about when you see their eyes and they're right up close and it's just that casual.

Speaker 1 You can talk to to them like you're just talking at dinner, and you're all just kind of a little group.

Speaker 1 And you're just so, you can be so casual. And the big ones, you have to sort of put on a show, you have to play to this side and make sure they all hear you.

Speaker 1 And a nuns make sure that it's a little tougher. It's great.

Speaker 17 Movements have to be bigger. Like, yeah, you know, like I do, like, I make a lot of facial expressions when I talk.
I think that's where a lot of my comedy lies.

Speaker 17 Like, I might say one word, but the face that I make that goes with it is is like, well, that sells it, right?

Speaker 17 You're in one of those big old theaters and if they got like a whack-ass camera, or if there's no

Speaker 17 video footage at all, then you got to make it bigger.

Speaker 17 I'm like, oh, I'm making wrinkles trying to perform.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 This mistake I made the last special I did, I worked it out in clubs. And then I was in a big theater and

Speaker 2 there were no screens or anything. And it was very different.
The bits I was working on in clubs are very small, little stories and stuff.

Speaker 2 But it's fun to strut on a stage. I mean, Chris Rock is obviously the best at it as far as the physical movement back and forth.
But yeah, it's a completely different sport than a little club.

Speaker 17 Very, very different sport.

Speaker 1 When you were doing like stand-up, stand-up, stand-up, and then you get something like girls' trip, which is a big thing in your career.

Speaker 1 What is the change? Walk us through the change. Like that comes out.
Obviously, it's a big hit. You're a hit in a hit.

Speaker 1 What kind of are the things that you notice?

Speaker 17 I immediately noticed that people that told me that I wasn't going to be anything, that, you know, I should give up.

Speaker 17 You should just maybe get into modeling or get pregnant by a rich man and just give up on this. Were instantly like, I believed in you the whole time.
I knew you could do it.

Speaker 17 And I'm just looking at them like, do they think I don't have that niche?

Speaker 17 I forgot what you said to me.

Speaker 2 Phone rings, more free stuff.

Speaker 17 My bills are bigger.

Speaker 2 I noticed my bills are bigger.

Speaker 17 You know, things that were like so cheap, like a plumber,

Speaker 17 you know, the plumber comes to my house. I have a lead.
It costs $150 to fix. Now the plumber comes to my house.
It's like, oh, just need to change the washer on the dang sink faucet. And that's $500.

Speaker 17 What?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we need to change your washer and dryer.

Speaker 2 Famous person price kind of. Yeah, it is kind of that.

Speaker 17 And then I'm like, okay, so like, I only keep pictures of myself in like this room, right? Everything else is like in a box, in a closet, like away.

Speaker 17 Because if I have someone coming over to do some work, I don't even be here. I have my assistant in here, make it like my, it's my assistant's house.
And it's so that I could get the regular price.

Speaker 2 The real price. Smart.

Speaker 17 Yeah, because I still live in South Central L.A. I still live in a little, you know, 2,000 square foot house.
Like, I'm not doing it super big or anything.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's cool. I live honestly.
I spent most of you close.

Speaker 1 Are you going to be able to do that? When stuff like that happens. Oh, yeah.
I'm sorry, Dana.

Speaker 1 I was saying when stuff like that happens and you do well, I think people think they hand you a million dollars the next day. You still have to, you do get offers, but then you have to go do them.

Speaker 1 Then you you have to get paid, then you get whomped taxes, then you get agent manager. People forget, like, it's, it's really hard to build a ton of money.
It takes a while.

Speaker 2 The gross and the net. And just by the way, which you can talk to, is your monologue was hilarious.

Speaker 2 I looked at it today when you hosted SNL, which you got the Emmy for, was all around this idea that everyone assumed soon as girls trip hit, you're you got 20 million in the bank. You know,

Speaker 17 I was paid the least amount out of the girls, right?

Speaker 17 The most unknown.

Speaker 17 And

Speaker 17 I didn't start seeing no real money until maybe a year or two after it came out. Maybe a year and a half after it came out that I started

Speaker 17 making real money. And like, I did the night school movie and they're like, they're about to pay you a million dollars.

Speaker 2 I'm like, yeah, awesome. This is great.

Speaker 17 And I'm thinking, yeah, a million dollars. But like you just said, taxes hit and I don't got no kids, right?

Speaker 17 Then

Speaker 17 representative fees that hit. And that's like bananas.
Then, you know, the parents fee, clothing. So I get to do these appearances or these interviews.

Speaker 17 And they don't pay you to do the interviews or anything, but you have to buy clothes. You got to pay for makeup

Speaker 2 and all that.

Speaker 17 And by the time I

Speaker 17 was paying for everything, you have a stylist, all that,

Speaker 17 you know, I got like maybe $250,000 left. And then I have black tax.
And I don't know if you guys know what that is.

Speaker 2 I don't. Nope.
I want to hear though.

Speaker 17 There's some special black tax you know they'll be saying oh black women so mad we not mad or they'd be like they impatient we not impaired we the most patient it takes hours this hairdo took you know hours looks great hours i was very patient uh black tax though is when um family members uh reach out to you for money and they expect you to give it to them because we come from the same uterus or you know our we have the same grandma or we was in the same foster home so you should give me this money We're in the same town, we're in the same town.

Speaker 17 It doesn't take much when I was homeless, didn't have nowhere to sleep, no nothing. You wasn't checking for me, yeah.

Speaker 17 That's what I ended up like on the Carmichael show that they started like checking for me. Like, how you doing? What's going on? Can I hold five hundred? I need to hold 500.

Speaker 17 And then you like feeling a little guilty, and you're like, Yeah, here goes $500. Right, I'm gonna pay you.

Speaker 2 I don't want a big time.

Speaker 17 I get my taxes, I'm paying back. They never pay you back, and uh,

Speaker 2 also,

Speaker 1 they're getting it clean. Like if you gave someone five grand, you probably have to make 20 to clear five.
And they don't see. So you're basically giving them 20.
And then they get a tax-free five.

Speaker 1 And more than that, I've been hit up, obviously, from all sides. And

Speaker 1 they don't, no one thinks of that.

Speaker 17 How do you handle it?

Speaker 2 How do you?

Speaker 2 I didn't handle it well. I have a lot of wisdom now.
I think what you're talking about is really good.

Speaker 2 The thing that I learned, if you systemically give someone a check and they're healthy and young and can work and you're systemically trying to help them make it, you know, or whatever, you'll will always write them a check the rest of your life.

Speaker 2 I think that in show business,

Speaker 2 you want to be a little greedy with your money because you want to get to a point where, say, 10 years from now, you can choose the way you want to work.

Speaker 2 And that to get net dollars saved, I know we're, this is, we know these are first world problems, anyone listening,

Speaker 2 but it's personal what we do. And so you don't want to have to do a diaper commercial at 60 if you can help it.

Speaker 2 So it takes a long time to get a big pile of money where you get to be free from in show business. All right.
There's my

Speaker 2 two cents.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 2 just be careful. I do the same thing.

Speaker 1 I think you, there's part of you that doesn't want people to be mad at you. There's part of you that you don't want them to think you're big timing them.

Speaker 1 And it's not that much in quotes. And if you could just, but it, but you feel like you start buying friendships and stuff, it's all bad, you know.

Speaker 1 I remember one time we were out with, I had a famous friend and he was going to dinner. We got an argument.
And of course, I said the meanest thing. It was his birthday.
He was yelling at me.

Speaker 1 And I go, well, I wanted to be the actual friend at your party. But have a good time at dinner with your agent, publicist, manager, lawyer, and your whole team.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 And it makes you think and go, they all had to go, you know, because it's his party and they got to show up once in a while. And I was just voluntarily going until we got an argument about it.

Speaker 1 But that was a mean thing to say. But that same thing reversed with me.
Like, you know, you have your friends and you don't know who's, so you feel dumb.

Speaker 1 Family members, my dad, you know, it's one of those where I don't know your family, such, but my dad was deadbeat dad. And then he, of course, he come buzzing around.

Speaker 1 And then, of course, I bought him a condo. Like, it was just something you just go, I want you around.
I'm going to give you money to be around, basically. So weird.

Speaker 17 It's really weird. I spent a lot of money making sure my mom is okay.
I got her out. Like, that was my, one of my main.
That's okay.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I took care of my parents.

Speaker 2 That's what I do. Yeah.

Speaker 17 I got to make sure she got out of that mental institution. I get her the best doctors, the best, like food, everything, right? And she's doing great.

Speaker 17 And that's when, like, oh, yeah, I'm glad I have this money. And I've spent crazy amount, like crazy amount of money, like nurses and all that.
And when my grandmother,

Speaker 17 you know, she did so much for me growing up that I'm like, I got to do everything for her. I spent like $2 million

Speaker 17 trying to keep her alive. And I probably was making it worse for her.
Like, I probably should have just let her go the way she, you know, she.

Speaker 2 I know. I've been there and done that.
The numbers sound very familiar.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I, I, you know, I don't know where you're at of any sort of um

Speaker 2 pinching yourself or any I wouldn't use the word guilt or because you there's hard knocks in your time on you know um

Speaker 2 and so you're still in touch with that i can tell completely so just as your friend on the outside just make sure you take care of yourself yeah so now like when people ask me for money i um i tell them look i really value our friendship i really value our relationship

Speaker 17 and i can give you this money now you're saying you're going to pay me back you probably want them like yes i am yes i am okay i'm going to give you this money Okay.

Speaker 17 And if you don't pay me back by my birthday,

Speaker 17 then I've decided that we are no longer friends. We're no longer in a relationship.

Speaker 2 Big responsibility. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do they want to take that on?

Speaker 17 And if you want to take this money, you know, you value this money more than you value our friendship. I completely understand.
Nine times out of 10, they always say, no, thank you.

Speaker 17 I'll get back to you if I really, really need it.

Speaker 2 Because they know they're not going to pay me back.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 It's more important to see my friend than it is for me to go away. I paid you to pay for it.
He told me if they asked,

Speaker 2 give them five.

Speaker 1 They always pad in a skateboard and something else if they want.

Speaker 2 Well, like

Speaker 17 this one relative asked me said they asked me for $25,000. I was like, What?

Speaker 17 You haven't even made that in a freaking like you want $25,000? Like, yeah, I need $25,000. I'm like, okay, wait, I've just spent all this money to make sure our grandma get out.

Speaker 17 What do you need $25,000 for?

Speaker 17 Like, I want to start taco truck. Oh, I get a top.

Speaker 2 I'm like, but you can't even cook.

Speaker 17 You can't even cook. Yeah, I'm going to just get some Mexicans off about a Home Depot.
They can cook.

Speaker 17 And, you know, we're going to have a taco truck and I'll get you your money back within two months. I'm like,

Speaker 17 bullshit.

Speaker 17 Long-standing restaurants sometimes that are established for years, almost seven, ten years, are making $2,500 a month clearing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's so hard.

Speaker 17 Please miss me with the

Speaker 2 please.

Speaker 6 ready to level up?

Speaker 7 Chumba Casino is your playbook to fun.

Speaker 8 It's free to play with no purchase necessary.

Speaker 11 Enjoy hundreds of online social games like Blackjack, Slots, and Solitaire anytime, anywhere, with fresh releases every week.

Speaker 7 Whether you're at home or on the go, let Chumba Casino bring the excitement to you.

Speaker 10 Plus, get free daily login bonuses and a free welcome bonus.

Speaker 15 Join now for your chance to redeem some serious prizes.

Speaker 7 Play Chumba Casino today.

Speaker 6 No purchase necessary, VGW Group, Voidboard Prohibited by Law 21 21 plus.

Speaker 16 TNCs apply.

Speaker 5 Hey, everybody. It's me, Bill Maher.
If you're not watching or at least listening to Club Random, you're really missing something good and something unique.

Speaker 5 Because I don't think we look or sound like any other podcast. And that's by design.

Speaker 5 My life's quest has been to do some kind of show that captured the level of intimacy and the lack of artifice you would see if you saw me off camera talking to a friend.

Speaker 5 No one else in the room, plenty of pot and booze, and nothing planned. This is a show where I get high talking to someone I'm interested in to get to know and to laugh with.
It's not an interview.

Speaker 5 It's wild. And I'm having a ball and the guests are having a ball and you will too.

Speaker 5 So please follow Club Random with Bill Maher and see new episodes every Monday on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 Well, that's good. You're doing good.
And

Speaker 1 you're still out on the road.

Speaker 1 Is comic, is stand-up still your favorite thing?

Speaker 17 It's always going to be my favorite thing. It will always be,

Speaker 17 I can't go more than three weeks without doing stand-up and not start having like mental issues.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 I have to get on stage.

Speaker 1 It's fun to get up and do a set, especially if you live in L.A.,

Speaker 1 you can. That's what scares me about.
People go, why don't you move here? The taxes are so bad. I go, I like LA and I like that I have a few friends here.

Speaker 1 And I like hanging out in the hall at the comedy stores and I like just seeing a few comics and then you can pop on and buff out stuff and you feel because if you have a gig coming up where people are paying money, you want to be good.

Speaker 1 And you're like, God, I'm starting to get scared to go on again because I just need to go on and feel it again, just to feel it, just to get the organization because I owe these people.

Speaker 1 And it's fun anyway. Think of a new joke is fun.
Everything is fun.

Speaker 17 Whenever I'm stressed out, I head right to the comedy club. Even if I'm in another place, I'm like, where do they do comedy here?

Speaker 17 When I was in Africa, I was just in Africa and I'm like, oh, there's too much time is going by.

Speaker 17 Where can I do some comedy at here? Is there comedy here in Africa? They're like, there's a restaurant that you could go to that might have it. I go to this restaurant.

Speaker 17 And they don't even have like a real stage. It's like four benches pushed together in a boom box with the microphone.
And I'm like, give it to me.

Speaker 1 How fun.

Speaker 2 How fun.

Speaker 1 It's like karaoke, basically.

Speaker 2 How long long were you in Africa? Was this

Speaker 2 a month ago? I was there for a month.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I was there for a whole month. And I went to three different countries.
And I went to go to all countries that had their independence. You know,

Speaker 2 that were.

Speaker 1 What are they, Dana? Go ahead.

Speaker 2 Chad. Tanzania? No.

Speaker 1 Morocco.

Speaker 2 Is that one of them?

Speaker 17 I didn't go there, but I believe they have their independence.

Speaker 1 I'm trying to just name countries because I saw this on TikTok and people couldn't name any of them.

Speaker 2 I'm just into world-class distance runners. It would be Kenya,

Speaker 2 Ethiopia,

Speaker 2 Tanzania.

Speaker 1 Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Speaker 2 Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Speaker 1 Look at Tiffany just staring. Nope, nope.

Speaker 2 I have a friend from, I know, from Cameroon.

Speaker 17 They definitely don't have their independence in Cameroon.

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 17 It is crazy in Cameroon right now.

Speaker 1 I hear about Cameroon in the Olympics. that's about it, right?

Speaker 17 Okay, well, South Africa has their independence,

Speaker 2 okay?

Speaker 1 That's kind of a trick question.

Speaker 2 Okay, assume so. They were

Speaker 2 owned by the Dutch.

Speaker 1 Oh, Zimbabwe, you said?

Speaker 17 Okay, Zimbabwe has their independence.

Speaker 17 And you're right about Tanzania.

Speaker 2 Zambia.

Speaker 1 Dana knew something about the Dutch.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 17 The Dutch had it.

Speaker 2 And then my father-in-law was Dutch dutch and he felt bad about some of dutch colonialism

Speaker 2 so i remember him talking about it anyway

Speaker 17 they told me they told me like it's funny because i went to israel this year this year has been a year for travel for me and and i've wanted to travel because i want to see more of the world and i want to have like better understanding of the the articles I read and the things that I see.

Speaker 17 And also like, I've read the Bible, I've read the Quran, I've read the Torah, I've read all these books. And like, where's the religious capital of the world? Israel.

Speaker 17 Oh, this crazy stuff is going on right now in Israel.

Speaker 17 You know, should I go? Shouldn't I go? But I've been trying to go for years, but I've been busy trying to,

Speaker 17 you know, connect, collect my acorns.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I've been collecting acorns, you know, collecting my money, stacking my money.

Speaker 17 So I buy my ticket, I go.

Speaker 17 Although there was, you know, there's this turmoil going on over there.

Speaker 17 At the same time, I think it was a perfect time to go because there was no lines i got you know people were coming up to me happy to share information about the history of israel i learned so much and then to see the things that i read about in these bibles and the tor and the quran and all to see things in real life gave me a whole nother perspective and really has elevated my comedy and my point of view on who I am as a person, who God is, and all of that.

Speaker 17 Like, yeah, it was really, I think anybody who believes in God should at least go to israel one time

Speaker 2 it's crazy that's so interesting you did that i think it's great you're doing it i mean you've established your career and then why not do a few little things like that you have an opportunity not many people have and you take it was it scary i mean flying into israel

Speaker 2 they

Speaker 2 Because I knew people go on USO tours and they go, they turn the lights off, go on at night, or they corkscrew down under enemy fire. It wasn't like that.

Speaker 2 So yeah, I've done you have tours like in full war. There's a full war going on.

Speaker 17 And I've done tours and no, like that was more scary because you could hear stuff from the airplane. You could hear like that was more scary.

Speaker 17 Being on a big old commercial airline

Speaker 17 flying in was not

Speaker 2 scary.

Speaker 17 Going through the airport, the airport was beautiful.

Speaker 1 I was like, oh, it's kind of pampered. You don't really, unless you know what's going on, if you were oblivious, you just think I'm like, I'm on a great plane, I'm in a great hotel.

Speaker 17 You would think like, oh, wow, there's no lines here.

Speaker 2 We're, you know, it's barely anyway.

Speaker 17 It's nice, barely, there's traffic, but it's not LA traffic.

Speaker 2 It's felt like I was in California.

Speaker 17 The weather felt like California weather.

Speaker 2 Oh, really?

Speaker 17 I found hot springs and like just all this beautiful stuff. Like, oh my God, I went to Massawa.
I mean, not Massa. Massawa's in Eritrea, which is also very freaking beautiful.

Speaker 2 And they have their independence.

Speaker 17 But I went to Masada.

Speaker 17 And I was like, is this where Jamie Masada got his name?

Speaker 2 From the Laugh Factory.

Speaker 2 Maybe. Maybe.

Speaker 17 Who I consider like a dad. And I had to hit him up.
And he's like, oh, yes, I grew up around that area. And he's telling me all these stories.

Speaker 17 And I'm just like, well, I didn't even know you were from this part of the Middle East. I thought you were from another part, but okay.

Speaker 2 Like crazy. Crazy.
Did you go, did you travel with someone? I'm just curious.

Speaker 17 I went by myself.

Speaker 2 And then what? That's grown up. That's very grown up.

Speaker 17 I went all by myself. And when I got there, I met up with a few people that I knew.
So like Michael Rappaport was there.

Speaker 2 So that was, that was interesting.

Speaker 1 It's fun, hanging, I'm sure.

Speaker 17 My friend Matthew Siegel was there. And one of the guys from Cheaters was there.
And

Speaker 17 we did some tours together, stuff I did by myself. I wanted to find black people.

Speaker 2 That was my other mission.

Speaker 17 Like, where are all all the black people i know it's got to be black this is where were they

Speaker 2 in israel

Speaker 2 it gotta be some black people here

Speaker 17 if black people believe in jesus it gotta be some black people

Speaker 17 i found a bunch of the eritrain the ethiopian and eritrean jews i've hung out with them and then i found the largest diaspora the largest immigration of black americans anywhere in the world is in israel in um demona and and i kept telling everybody i want to go go to Demona.

Speaker 17 I want to go to they're like, no, you shouldn't go to Demona. Why would you want to Demona? That's where they keep the secret weapons.
The nuclear weapons are hidden in Demona.

Speaker 17 And I'm like, I want to go there. I want to go to Demona.
Take me to Demona. Take me to Demona.

Speaker 1 Sounds interesting.

Speaker 17 I got them to take me to Demona, and it felt like I was in the hood, but not in the hood.

Speaker 2 Because, like,

Speaker 17 these, they look like Black Americans. When they speak English, they sound like Black Americans.
But then they speak fluent Hebrew and they're like, oh, vegetarians. All of a sudden, like their

Speaker 17 kiputs was like so beautiful and so dope. And just, I was just like, it made me so proud to be a human.
It just made me proud to be a Black American Jew. It just made me so proud and happy.

Speaker 1 Did you, were you well known?

Speaker 17 Yeah, I'm very famous.

Speaker 2 Oh, all around the world.

Speaker 17 All around the world, internationally known.

Speaker 17 You know, it's funny because I have prayed to God to, you know, give me a way to show these studios that I am internationally known and i could be in a film that's for international purposes right and uh because i was told i wasn't internationally known enough and then i took a nap in beverly hills

Speaker 17 you took a nap in beverly hills what took a nap in a car in beverly hills police came

Speaker 2 Oh, that's right. Oh, yeah, you took a nap in Beverly Hills.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 2 Sounds like a chapter of a book.

Speaker 1 That probably got worldwide pickup.

Speaker 17 Baby, I was so shocked.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I made it

Speaker 17 too. I was so shocked when I came home just a few hours later how I was on KTLA, NBC, CBS, Fox,

Speaker 17 PBS, CNN.

Speaker 17 I was on ESPN, BB. I was like, ESPN, I'm not even an athlete.
The you know, BBC World News. I'm like, yep, like this is kind of awesome.
Yo, like, I prayed for when it showed the studios.

Speaker 17 I didn't know it was going to be like this, though. It was on African World News.
And when I went to those plays, when I went to Israel, when I went to Africa, everybody brought it up.

Speaker 17 So do you want alcohol?

Speaker 2 No, are you good?

Speaker 2 Do you want a car to sleep in? Let's get her alcohol. I seen the, she falls asleep in the car.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's what you like. Yes.

Speaker 2 She likes vodka.

Speaker 17 We know you love vodka. You love vodka.

Speaker 1 We love it so much.

Speaker 2 That's only a drive and fall sleeping car. We love everything about you, Mistafini Hades.

Speaker 2 No, I don't know what accent that is, but sounds good what what was that story do you want to tell it all i know is the broad strokes you fell asleep in a car and you're fine yeah so basically i was serving food to the homeless out there at the laugh factory um every year during thanksgiving they do that okay

Speaker 17 i go served almost 3 000 people food uh and jokes uh performed on almost every show And I left there and that morning I woke up at 6 a.m.

Speaker 17 and put a pot of collagreens on, like cooked this food for my family.

Speaker 17 And so I left from the live factory, went home, got the pot of collagreens, got the turkey, two turkeys, went to my family's house, served them.

Speaker 17 And then I got a call from a friend that lives in Beverly Hills in Bell Air.

Speaker 17 That the chef, they had to fire the chef and the foods, they don't have any food. Do I have any leftovers? And I was like, let me see, let me check with my family.
Everybody had made their Tupperware.

Speaker 17 And I was like, yeah, I got leftovers. They said, can you bring it in? I said, I can't be there until like 10.

Speaker 2 They're like, fine.

Speaker 17 I brought leftovers. They, they ate it all.
They were like, this is the best freezes, best turkey, best, best, best, best.

Speaker 17 And then I had, I did have a drink or two.

Speaker 2 I had probably two drinks.

Speaker 17 I did, I finished one. I didn't finish the second one.
I fell asleep on the couch because I was exhausted, right? You know,

Speaker 17 like that is being of service and I think you're doing too much.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 17 I woke up. uh somebody was like this lady was like you could sleep here sleep here oh

Speaker 17 she's doing something sexy and i was like

Speaker 17 i'm leaving you're not finna have me in the news 10 years from now talking about something i feel vilated and all that nope i'm leaving

Speaker 2 so i like

Speaker 17 took some other people felt uncomfortable too they wanted to leave too so dropped them off at home

Speaker 1 oh a drop off okay more

Speaker 2 people off This is exactly what I thought would happen before this incident. Go ahead.

Speaker 17 In my Tesla, in my Tesla, put it on pilot because i knew i was tired and um you know the tesla the way it's set up your eyes closed if your hands are off the steering wheel too long it will over in such a way to get you help because it thinks that you have you know something's wrong incident yeah so it pulls over so it parked perpendicular to the sidewalk as opposed to parallel and had my ass out in the street without a light or anything like that and i had been there for quite some time because the car had turned off the the police thought i was dead in the car because I was like this.

Speaker 2 Like leaned over.

Speaker 17 Like, they said I was slumped over the steering wheel. To me, that means you're like, like you leaned over.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 17 I was just sitting in my head with them.

Speaker 17 And they thought I was dead because I didn't respond to them knocking on the window or whatever. And so the ambulance was there.
And I heard them talking. I heard talking.

Speaker 2 Oh, fuck.

Speaker 17 And the talking, I opened my eyes and looked over and I was like, oh, shit, she's alive. She's alive.

Speaker 1 Scary people just say, you don't even know where you are.

Speaker 17 And I was like, oh, damn.

Speaker 17 And then I thought that was another prayer being answered because I had prayed to God to send me a handsome man with his own career that, you know, I didn't have to be like that, he could tell me interesting stories, something.

Speaker 17 Oh, sending me my prayers. And they started asking me questions about drinking.
And I was just like, you know what? Like, just take me to the police station.

Speaker 17 Let's just go to the police station because. That's what I've learned, you know, just, you know, blowing that breathalyzer.
Don't do BJs in the streets.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 So, your prayers were answered because the resting officer was very handsome. Is that what you meant? I'm sorry, I missed that.
Oh, yeah, yeah. So, you wanted to hang out.

Speaker 17 So, was the EMTs that, you know, took my vitals and said my blood pressure was normal. I was like, good, I've been working on that.
That's great.

Speaker 2 I got a physical.

Speaker 17 I got an $1,800 physical.

Speaker 17 you know, some thousands of dollars in some community service

Speaker 2 on,

Speaker 2 you know letting these studios know that uh i'm internationally known yeah nice was this ever really explained in the media what you just told us no that i blew a 0.03 no yeah and that you were just just purely exhausted you were in a in an ai car that assisted you yeah that saved my life potentially potentially saved my life yeah and i'm i'm so grateful like you know i know a lot of people don't like tesla or whatever but i appreciate and i'm grateful that that car exists what it's trying to do yeah it's a good so you you blew a 0.03

Speaker 2 that's not illegal like one drink uh that's that's totally legal 0.08 what is it 0.08 yeah used to be used to one

Speaker 2 0.08 is not you're not slurring or falling down you know i wasn't slurring then either no no and yet it went global what was the head what was the headline that did it did were you like shock what did it say you can be arrested for another dui and the first dui which i'm i want a hearing for i want a trial i want a trial because i was walking into my house oh

Speaker 2 but weed is illegal

Speaker 2 weed is illegal isn't weed legal

Speaker 17 and not in georgia

Speaker 1 just wait long enough till weed's illegal everywhere and then go to trial

Speaker 1 weed is really doesn't hit the air ear as something scary anymore it's like people just go huh we we do have bigger fish to fry these days no even trump wants it to to be legal for personal use in Florida.

Speaker 17 I think tobacco should be illegal. That kills more people.

Speaker 1 That's the one that, yeah, I mean, that's, I mean, if we're really getting into it, it's true.

Speaker 2 And as far as mind-altering substances, there's nothing even close to cannabis.

Speaker 2 It's the most benign by a millionfold. No one's ever overdosed on cannabis.

Speaker 1 And Snoop's president, it'll

Speaker 1 change. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Drop it like it's hot. Drop it like like a top.

Speaker 17 That's my family, right there. I love Snoop.
I got three songs with him.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 17 Now, maybe you and your sister, maybe it's no, yeah, it's two.

Speaker 2 Well, it didn't surprise me when they put him in the Olympics.

Speaker 2 When I heard they're going to put Snoop there, I go, He's going to own the Olympics because there's something about him that everyone loves him. It's just, I don't know what he just is.

Speaker 2 He is a fun guy, he's just likable. Just, just the, I don't know, his, you just want to hang out with him, put it that way.

Speaker 6 Ready to level up?

Speaker 7 Chumba Casino is your playbook to fun.

Speaker 8 It's free to play with no purchase necessary.

Speaker 11 Enjoy hundreds of online social games like Blackjack, Slots, and Solitaire anytime, anywhere, with fresh releases every week.

Speaker 7 Whether you're at home or on the go, let Chumba Casino bring the excitement to you.

Speaker 10 Plus, get free daily login bonuses and a free welcome bonus.

Speaker 15 Join now for your chance to redeem some serious prizes.

Speaker 9 Play Chumba Casino today.

Speaker 13 No purchase necessary, VGW Group, Void War prohibited by law 21 plus TNCs apply.

Speaker 18 Don't let the holidays derail your fitness.

Speaker 4 Stay on track with hydro. 20 minutes rowing on a hydro targets 86% of your muscles as Olympians guide you from incredible locations worldwide.
Running can't compete.

Speaker 4 That's why 90% stick with hydro a year later. GQ named the hydro arc the best rower of 2025.
And every hydro comes with free shipping, a 30-day trial, and warranty.

Speaker 4 Go to hydro.com code fit and save up to to 600 bucks on your next hydro. Hydro.com code fit.

Speaker 1 What about before we got to let you go in a second, but this last OG.

Speaker 17 I'm here for it. We can hang out, guys.

Speaker 2 I have enough. Nothing else to do.

Speaker 1 We have a question for you. I just want to hear about Tracy Morgan because he's so funny.
And that show, The OG.

Speaker 2 What was that? Oh, TBS.

Speaker 17 The last OG on TBS. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And he was, he had to be kind of fun to work with, right?

Speaker 2 Didn't you work with him?

Speaker 1 I we were not the same over lap in years.

Speaker 2 I just know him a little bit when he was there, and he's he's a character. He's, yeah, Mr.
D. He called me Mr.
D.

Speaker 2 It's not getting easier, Mr. D.

Speaker 2 Not getting easier, you know.

Speaker 2 And I thought it was that show Oprah with him, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 And did you guys have fun?

Speaker 17 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah. It was Chevy Chase and me, Tracy, Tina Faye.

Speaker 17 This is before the accident.

Speaker 2 Yes, but

Speaker 2 he had a kidney transplant or something and they put it in the front. He was patting it.
You know, it's just an open book. He's just.

Speaker 17 Did he tell you that it was his girlfriend's kidney?

Speaker 2 And then I think so. Yeah, yeah.
And he goes, it's right here.

Speaker 1 I think that's a jinx because that happened to George Lopez, right?

Speaker 17 Took his wife. George took his wife's kidney and then they got divorced.

Speaker 1 You know, it's bad when you say, see you later, sucker.

Speaker 2 I know.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's a tough one because talk about a non-guilt-free divorce. I mean, geese, you just go to the doctor.

Speaker 2 Did it take? Yes, it's good. I'm fine.
I got to make a call.

Speaker 2 It's okay.

Speaker 1 We've been having problems.

Speaker 2 So, are you actively?

Speaker 17 I enjoyed working on it. I learned a lot about myself working on that show because I was mostly the straight man.
So

Speaker 17 that being the straight man.

Speaker 5 You the straight man.

Speaker 1 It's interesting.

Speaker 17 The straight man.

Speaker 17 And it was not the easiest because I want to crack jokes. I want to it's hard.

Speaker 2 I did it in the wrong messy. It's a little difficult.

Speaker 17 Be boring to me and just do what they write. Just do what they write.

Speaker 17 And then I would say after like three or four episodes, I was like, oh, okay, I got the heck of this. I can be, I can do straight man stuff.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Straight man is valuable.

Speaker 17 It's necessary.

Speaker 2 Yeah. But I don't know why.
Well, anyway, they cast you and whatever but it seems like that they're wasting a whole quadrant of ability you know

Speaker 17 yeah you got a lot of fun a lot of it's very rare a lot of people can act you know yeah but you know how this world is like you know it's they just want you it's yeah well also just like you know there's it's not my show It was his show.

Speaker 17 So it's for him to shine. It's for him to be funny.

Speaker 17 You know, I am just

Speaker 17 a little squiggly line in the, in the drawing, you know.

Speaker 1 Did they ever say these words? The name of the show is the Tracy Morgan Show.

Speaker 17 No.

Speaker 1 It's not the Tiffany Haddish Show.

Speaker 17 No. I've had that.
They never had that.

Speaker 1 Versions of that along my career.

Speaker 17 They never

Speaker 17 he might have said it, but they didn't.

Speaker 17 Remember, remember, you're on my show, okay?

Speaker 2 All right. My show,

Speaker 17 Tracy Morgan Show. We're going to get Emmys.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 17 Just while we're doing this for the Emmys.

Speaker 2 Well,

Speaker 17 behave yourself or I'll get you pregnant. Okay.
I could get you. Oh.

Speaker 2 That's a good threat. Behave yourself, or I'll get you pregnant.
That's a comedy album or something.

Speaker 17 Oh, no, he didn't say, he didn't say it like that, but he did use to joke about getting me pregnant. And I used to laugh and be like, your son is more my speed.

Speaker 17 Oh,

Speaker 17 his son was like 30,

Speaker 17 32.

Speaker 2 Oh,

Speaker 1 hot.

Speaker 2 He's all right.

Speaker 1 He's all right. Don't give away your cards.

Speaker 1 But, you know, I think TBS in their head is like, we have Tracy. If we could get Tracy and Tiffany, it's just more potent.
It's a great poster. It's great.

Speaker 1 And it's not a bad gig and blah, blah, blah. So, yeah, I've done a million things like that where you're just sometimes you're the one they're writing for, sometimes you're not.

Speaker 2 But just one more thing along the way.

Speaker 17 I am fine with being the not funny person in something.

Speaker 2 I mean, according to the internet or to some people's opinion, you know,

Speaker 17 it's just a pretty girl that's loud.

Speaker 1 I love it.

Speaker 17 That's fine. And I just don't know how many female comics have done what I've done.

Speaker 1 You've done a lot.

Speaker 2 Who

Speaker 1 just said you're batting her eyes?

Speaker 2 When you're a little girl,

Speaker 2 who are you watching and seeing that?

Speaker 17 inspires you i'm watching whoopi goberg who like i used to think was my actual birth mother. And she just

Speaker 17 looked at the purpose of making people laugh and she's going to come back and get me.

Speaker 17 Lucia Barr was my favorite to watch. Lucille Ball, Carol Burnett,

Speaker 17 Theodale.

Speaker 17 Oh, Marshall Warfield.

Speaker 2 Oh, I

Speaker 2 worked with her a lot. I worked, did a comedy competition with her in San Francisco, which she won, by the way.

Speaker 17 of course she did she's hilarious yeah she is a force of nature and brilliantly funny yeah very funny and um i mean and then there's you know there's the george carlins there's a lot of men that i watched but um

Speaker 17 yeah for women that that that was like my thing christina applegate was so funny to me

Speaker 2 Like, oh, wow. Yeah, that's Mary with Children.

Speaker 17 I had to make sure I watched Mary with Children.

Speaker 2 That's great. She loved loved to hear that.

Speaker 17 Because I wanted to, I was like, I have to learn how to be that girl because I am that girl. Like, I'm, I, like, I'm not the smartest girl.
So I got to learn how to be that and still get what I want.

Speaker 2 Like,

Speaker 1 yeah. Also, Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter Was Dead was a great, funny, weird movie.
When she was on, we talked about that, right, Dana? Yeah.

Speaker 1 And someone said the other day they watched it with their kids, and they were like, oh, we won't be watching this with the kids because you forget some of those old movies like that are so raunchy because there was no PC police and it just would kill.

Speaker 1 And then you go later, oh, take that out, take that out.

Speaker 17 Yeah, that's not politically correct anymore.

Speaker 1 No, on reruns.

Speaker 17 How like comedy doesn't live forever? Like the three stooges was so funny to me. I used to definitely beat up my sister, not on purpose, we were playing stooges.

Speaker 2 Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 17 But like, if you watch that, like, they would, if you put that on now, people would be like, oh, no, no, that's, you know, that's teaching the kids how to hurt each other. That's violence.

Speaker 2 And, you know, and I'm like, no, it's, it's white on white crime. I'm learning.

Speaker 1 The big thing is you say, our kids so much better now. They've had 30 years to change everything.
Is it way better now? I don't think so. It's all just different.

Speaker 17 They're even more violent. They're doing like, see,

Speaker 1 we didn't have Call of Duty. How about that?

Speaker 2 More violent.

Speaker 1 We didn't practice gunning.

Speaker 17 We had school shootings when I was a kid. Right.
In the 1900s, there weren't school shootings. There might have been a shooting down the street from the school.

Speaker 1 It was fights. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I think old-fashioned hearts.

Speaker 17 And when you talk bad about somebody, you had to watch your mouth because when they say,

Speaker 17 don't let your mouth write a check that your ass can't cash.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 2 And you used to be able to

Speaker 17 ass were talking crazy to you. Now, if somebody talks crazy to you, you hit them first, or they hit you, and you beat their ass down to the ground.

Speaker 2 Now you sued. And you're going.

Speaker 2 Yep.

Speaker 1 Oh, anyone's ready to sue anyone for anything.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 This lady wanted to sue me said I was stealing her life.

Speaker 2 That's a tough one. That's a new one, Your Honor.
That's a new one. The theft of my client's life.
I want Tiffany Haddish.

Speaker 17 She stole my life. She stole everything.
Everything that Tiffany Haddish has been through, she stole that from me. She making it.

Speaker 17 I'm like, well, here's my social worker if you want to talk to her and all my foster care.

Speaker 2 Here's my

Speaker 17 caught, you can catch those. You can have them.

Speaker 16 Also, you can have all these missions.

Speaker 2 You click every box.

Speaker 17 Every time a man ever hit me in the face, you can have that.

Speaker 2 You can have everything. You can have all of that.

Speaker 17 And it's good. Take it on.

Speaker 2 The reason we're leaving is the exact same. Tiffany is.
pulling things up and doing act out.

Speaker 2 We're not laughing at the idea of it, but I just feel when I.

Speaker 17 Oh, yeah, I forgot this is just audio. Not bad.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 You're just

Speaker 2 fine. It's fine.
But you're, you seem.

Speaker 2 Well, this was, I found this interesting. You do a special.

Speaker 2 It's called She's She Ready. Then you produce one with other comedians called They Ready.
I mean, who does that?

Speaker 17 Okay, wait. First, the first special was She Ready from the Hood to Hollywood.

Speaker 2 I know. That's, but then when I saw it on the thing, they, they, they truncated it and I wrote it down that way.
But I know it, it was from the hood to Hollywood was the full, the full thing. Yes.

Speaker 2 That was a whole next one was they ready.

Speaker 2 Yes. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 And what was the long version?

Speaker 17 The longer version? No, there wasn't a longer version. It was just they ready in property

Speaker 17 at its best. I was going to get it right.

Speaker 2 So, was that Tiffany Haddish presents in a way?

Speaker 17 Like, creative. Yeah, that was Tiffany.

Speaker 2 Yeah, for other people.

Speaker 1 Showtime.

Speaker 2 I'm just saying. I'm just saying.
That's, you know, it was Netflix.

Speaker 17 It wasn't Showtime. It was Netflix.

Speaker 2 Yes. And I did that.

Speaker 17 And I did that because I wanted, like i had a little juice a little power and you know i just wanted for the people that looked out for me over the years yeah

Speaker 17 for them i wanted them to have the opportunities i wish somebody would have gave any of us just

Speaker 17 totally so why what like what's the point of building up all this notoriety and celebrity and prestige if you can't open a door to forever yeah pay it forward pay it forward some of those people i slept on the couch, you know, when I didn't have no money to pay like my rent or whatever, they, they helped me get gigs.

Speaker 17 Like, I'll never forget.

Speaker 17 Do you guys know Elon Gold?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Very, very well.

Speaker 17 Yes.

Speaker 17 And Elon told me in the beginning, like in the earlier stages of my career, he said, Tiffany, the only way that you will make a living in this business is by having good relationships with other comedians.

Speaker 17 Comedians will always keep you working. If you can call any, you keep good relationships.
You can call any of those guys and go, hey, man, I need to make some money. I'm having issues.

Speaker 17 Do you know of any shows going on? Like, can you link me up? And they will get you work. You will always work.

Speaker 17 And those comedians that aren't good, but they're good writers, they'll end up becoming writers or showrunners.

Speaker 17 And if you have a good relationship, they'll be like, yo, we need to get you in there. And they'll get you in there.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I like your attitude.

Speaker 2 Just about the whole thing. It seems like you're really connected to your struggle and your journey.
So you still feel very authentic.

Speaker 2 sorry to use the word like just in the moment in other words people might watch out for like he or she they're going to get a big head or they're going to be different you know it's going to go to their head i don't think it ever went to i mean comedy is so freaking hard at times and show business in general beats the shit out of you uh even at any level pretty much i don't know who's had the free ride there you know Do you read reviews of your movies and your performances?

Speaker 2 And do they affect you or you don't read them or if they're great?

Speaker 17 Do you really read reviews because I don't think anybody even does reviews anymore, do they?

Speaker 2 It must be social media, basically.

Speaker 17 Yeah, so I read social media comments, and

Speaker 17 I have to, I get sometimes I get really upset with people because I'm just like, really?

Speaker 17 Like, why are you even following me if you feel this way about me?

Speaker 2 Like, why are you even here?

Speaker 1 I've DM'd people back and said, you follow me. You look like an idiot.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 You have all these complaints and you still follow me.

Speaker 17 Yeah, weird. You're weird.
Like,

Speaker 17 there was at one point in time, I got really mad and

Speaker 17 somebody that was obese had said something about me. And then they said that it looked like I had, they said, oh, the way that I was acting is like, I got that.

Speaker 17 I got, I must got some of that.

Speaker 17 powder sugar or powder, you know, that cocaine powder on my

Speaker 17 so then I said, well, you need to put down the powder donuts, you fat bitch. Like I just went the fuck in.

Speaker 17 I probably shouldn't have done that, but you know i'm from these streets i was ready to fight her she cut i read that at like two in the morning and so i was like in my mind it is 1995 again and you about to get roasted you want to roast me i'm about to roast your fat ass and i just kind of went in and i knew she was fat because i had did my research on her for about 45 minutes

Speaker 17 and i knew she was on her weight loss journey and i figured your journey

Speaker 2 Anything that ends with bitch is funny. Did you get in trouble? Journey bitch, fat bitch, with bitch.

Speaker 1 Well, it's like someone saying it to your face. That's why it takes so personal.
I get mad when they say it's like they read it to you and ran. And you're like, no, no, I'm going to come catch you.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 17 Like, you think I'm not going to be on your shit? You want

Speaker 2 like you want me to be able to do that? No freebies.

Speaker 17 Somebody else's page on somebody else's thing talking crazy, but you in my page. Yeah.

Speaker 17 So I had to sign it to, did I get in trouble? No, because I went into my fake page.

Speaker 17 I went in that ass.

Speaker 17 And then I was like, if if you keep fucking with Tiffany Haddish, somebody's gonna show up on you.

Speaker 1 Oh, good job.

Speaker 2 Have you ever said, What's up, fuck face

Speaker 2 on social media? No, I don't think I'm like, what's up, bitch?

Speaker 1 You know, my last time I fought back, it wasn't quite as harsh.

Speaker 1 This guy said, I have a picture of me on stage

Speaker 1 and I have a coat on. And they go, why do you wear stand-up wearing a coat?

Speaker 2 And I go, really?

Speaker 1 Do you think anyone asked this question to Fonzi?

Speaker 2 Well, I cut.

Speaker 2 I wish the viewers or the listeners could see Dana turn super red.

Speaker 2 I'm embarrassed.

Speaker 2 He likes it.

Speaker 2 There was a lot of bullets to it.

Speaker 17 But the way you're giggling is like, you felt like I was saying that to you.

Speaker 2 Yes. Well, you hit it nice and.

Speaker 1 crisp and hard really nail it it's a good sharp

Speaker 17 well yes it's my way also sometimes I'll call people booger wolfs. I'll be like, you an ugly ass booger wolf ass bitch.
You know, booger wolf is my other favorite go-to.

Speaker 2 I haven't heard that.

Speaker 2 Is that yours or is that a phrase that people use? Booger wolf.

Speaker 17 It used to be really popular in the 80s.

Speaker 2 It did.

Speaker 17 See, you guys aren't black, so you don't know this, but

Speaker 17 in the black community back in the 80s, 90s

Speaker 17 was the thing to call somebody.

Speaker 17 And it's like, you know, they're they're so they're so ugly their attitude their everything is so ugly that there's like you know they're they're like a wolf it's a hideous thing i go back to

Speaker 17 coming out like

Speaker 2 you're a fret wolf i went back to sami davis jr i think he would say what's up jive turkey jive turkey was jive turkey first i think jj walker is jive turkey still around good times

Speaker 17 no but wild turkey is but let's bring back jive turkey i'm now jive turkey was only for like that's only like when you want to like make reference to an old uncle or something you know yeah

Speaker 1 i've said jive turkey not even joking three times in the last two weeks it's so funny to me it's such a funny phrase

Speaker 17 yeah what is that a turkey that dances i don't know

Speaker 2 i tried to invent a catchphrase once go ahead

Speaker 2 sequitur when fourth grade everything was like bitching bitching was up and all that so i started saying to all the kids, out of sight, man, that's out of sight.

Speaker 2 And it took me like a month, and everyone was saying, That's out of sight.

Speaker 1 Sorry, you didn't start out of sight.

Speaker 2 I started out of sight 1965.

Speaker 1 Tiffany, before I let you go,

Speaker 1 she ready.

Speaker 2 She ready.

Speaker 1 You started blank, blank, blank, bitch, whatever it is.

Speaker 2 Google Wolf ass bitch.

Speaker 1 I met Tiffany.

Speaker 2 I'm just getting a little punchy at this point. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Every time you say bitch, I'm going to laugh. I don't know.
I'm just getting a little. Anyway,

Speaker 2 it's, we have to read ads or something, but.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Tiffany. And thank you for talking to us.
And you're so lovely. I like that you're doing all this stuff.
And it just adds to your smarts.

Speaker 1 You're just someone going out there, feeding their brain. It's very nice to hear that.
It's something that people talk about doing or think about doing. Not everyone does it.

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 17 I want to evolve as a human. You know, this is the only life I'm living.
And I want to know.

Speaker 1 It's such a good

Speaker 1 inspiring thing.

Speaker 2 I can't. Well, it is great to have

Speaker 2 Stand Up as an outlet for that.

Speaker 2 Because you've always done sort of you on stage and talked about you.

Speaker 2 So it's interesting to take all these lessons you're learning and experiences and then make a kick-ass stand-up special and say, Dave Chappelle, follow that.

Speaker 17 I would never say that to Dave Chappelle.

Speaker 2 No, no, I said it because

Speaker 2 he's the goat. That's why I used him.
Ironically.

Speaker 19 The second half of the basketball season is here, and the race to the playoffs continues on Prize Picks, the best daily fantasy sports app to cash in on your favorite sports.

Speaker 19 The app is simple: pick more or less on at least two players for a shot to win up to a thousand times your cash.

Speaker 19 Download the Prize Picks app today and use code FIELD and get $50 instantly when you play $5. That's code FIELD on PrizePicks to get $50 instantly when you play $5.

Speaker 19 Win or lose, you'll get $50 for just playing. Guaranteed.
Prize picks. Run your game.
Must be present in a certain state. Visit PrizePicks.com for restrictions and details.

Speaker 20 Tito's handmade vodka is America's favorite vodka for a reason.

Speaker 20 From the first legal distillery in Texas, Tito's is six times distilled till it's just right and naturally gluten-free, making it a high-quality spirit that mixes with just about anything.

Speaker 20 From the smoothest martinis to the best Bloody Marys. Tito's is known for giving back, teaming up with nonprofits to serve its communities and do good for dogs.

Speaker 20 Make your next cocktail of titos distilled and bottled by fifth generation inc austin texas 40 alcohol by volume savor responsibly

Speaker 2 do you remember by the way we we met at this uh kind of corporate event we did the beverly hilton yeah that was casa la

Speaker 17 o casa la and that's it wasn't corporate it was found it was a foundation it was a charity

Speaker 2 Charity, sorry, yes.

Speaker 2 But it was tables and then you were, so you're going to open for me.

Speaker 2 and they said tiffany hadish i said toughany watis what and then i went out because it and i said uh uh-oh i better i'm gonna go look at my notes because i you know i knew then i thought you know

Speaker 2 i don't know if star is born or is that before girls trip where you'd had acting jobs but i didn't really understand but yeah you were

Speaker 2 right before girls trip and i had acting and all i did was talk about being in foster care yes that was the connection to it it was personal personal for you but um it didn't didn't surprise me later when oh she's a star you know i always go by stand people one way one metric is like who you wouldn't want to follow you know like i wouldn't want to follow dave chapelle i wouldn't want to follow you you know some people go i can handle dana is that why you didn't take me on the road with you dana when i asked you Did you ask me to go on the road?

Speaker 2 Because I don't really go on the road.

Speaker 17 And you were like, you got really awkward and you turned red like right now and you kind of giggled.

Speaker 17 We'll look into it.

Speaker 2 I remember that. And then I got you in a headlock and I was going, come on, bitch.

Speaker 2 You got me a noogie.

Speaker 2 We'll look into it, buddy.

Speaker 2 He doesn't go on the road with me.

Speaker 1 He's the worst.

Speaker 2 I like doing standard, but I don't like to travel. That's the problem.

Speaker 17 No, that's the part that sucks.

Speaker 17 I'm working on that. I've been watching YouTube videos on how to manifest teleportation.
So

Speaker 17 when I get that down, I'll be the GOAT for sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah, tell us.

Speaker 2 When you can teleport yourself to someplace else on earth, please come back.

Speaker 17 Yeah. Yeah.
I'm going to teleport myself into your office right

Speaker 2 going.

Speaker 1 Oh shit. I dream of genie.

Speaker 1 All right, Tiffany, we'll talk to you later. Thank you for doing this.

Speaker 2 Thanks for the laughs. Be well.
Thanks for the laughs.

Speaker 1 This has been a presentation of Odyssey. Please follow, subscribe, leave a like, a review, all the stuff, smash that button, whatever it is, wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 Fly on the Wall is executive and produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, and Heather Santoro. The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman.