Brett Goldstein

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Find your realtor at championsofhome.com. David, I don't know if you know this about me But I've always been a fan of exploring new places Not like you, kind of, you know, no offense And one of my best trips, listen up Is when I stayed at an Airbnb Felt like I was living like a local With all the space You know, hotels can be a hassle room service and then the housekeeper, it's a hassle.
So then you go to Airbnb and you can get whatever you want, a little cottage, this and that. It's fantastic.
You have your own separate space. So it's a great product for people who travel.
David? Yes, I have friends doing one of these right now. you have a home you can airbnb it it's fantastic i mean um to to monetize your home when you're not there seems like a good idea i mean look i'm on the road a lot i could probably do it it's it's something that people can do when they travel they have extra space or you're at a place full-time.
You come in the winter. You leave in the summer.
That's something you should think about. It's a way to get some extra money.
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David, our guest today. So you're going to have a good time, people.

Brett Goldstein, most famously known as Roy Kent, the gruff alpha male on Ted Lasso,

which you got two Emmy Awards for.

Yes, it was good to talk to another gruff alpha male for me.

It was nice.

This dude has done everything. From.
He has done Dr. Who.
He has done Derek. I think Derek is the one with Ricky Gervais.
Yes. And then, and then as of late, he's filming right now, rom-com with J-Lo, which he wrote with, with a friend of his.
And he's doingrinking With Harrison Ford Jason Segel So just non-stop he has a deal with We can go on and on He has a stand-up special He writes and produces all these shows And then he's in them and stuff He'll tell us an interesting story About how he got cast Yes we made him do that and he was gracious. He's actually talking to us on his break from the movie on a weekend, which was very generous of him.
And I had some good laughs with him. Obviously, he's a comedian.
So we cracked up, but we dissected the comedy special like we always do and his, which is coming out soon. What is it called, Dana? His comedy special? Oh, that's called The Second Best Night of Your Life.
That's right. It's a cool name.
HBO coming out. He's a very curious person as a writer.
So he asked us a lot of questions. Yeah.
We did talk a lot. we did so bear with that yeah he was kind of curious about our situation he has a podcast called films to be buried with as well that's out there um so yeah he's super busy highly successful and completely humble yeah so a lot of fun and uh very humble and asked us.
So don't get mad about that because I know it was,

but it's fun if they're interested and we had a great three-way chat.

It was like being at dinner and here he is.

Guys, how are you?

How are you?

Hey, somebody looks like their picture.

Nice to see you again. Of course you remember when you met me.
Yes. You do? I remember both.
Well, I haven't had a long chat with either of you, and I'm a big fan, but I've introduced David on stage. Oh, yeah.
Interesting. I remember that.
I told Dana that. We just ran into each other at one of those loud parties.
It wasn't a time to, Hey, I really like Ted Lasso. Really? Yeah, I know Jason Sudeikis.
Really? I'll kiss you. I hate those parties, man.
That fucking music drives me nuts. Hey, whoa, whoa.
I'm coming in hot. What party was it? It was one of the SNL parties.
Yes, that's right. That's where it was.
And I wanted to say I love Edward and Harry, but it was too loud. I'm exhausted right now because I've looked at all what you're doing out there right now.
I'm exhausted because he's read your credits. You've got a lot going on.
Yes. Busy boy.
He's like, yes, and that's why I have to jump off right now. Can I just do a question? Like what? I know these are sort of cliche in a sense, but I guess like in 2017, 2018, you were kind of regular famous.
You've done some things. And then Ted Lasso and you became extra famous.
Yeah. What year? How long have you been extra famous? This has been like three years since people are like, hey, are you? It was a weird thing where we did lockdown.
And when we came out of lockdown, we suddenly were pointed at in the street. Oh, so it was playing the whole time? Just pointed at you.
Hey! We were like, what's in lockdown? What's on our face? our face um if they said to you if this is a deal i would take we're gonna lock you down for two years but you'll be super famous after i would say okay that's kind of what happened kind of a dystopian nightmare and you just were emancipated from it into love and human beings being so excited to see you. Oh, that's a very nice way of thinking about it.
How have you two coped with being famous for as long as you have been famous, which is a long, long time now? David, you go first. We like it when guests ask questions.
Yeah. Thank you.
I'm glad we got through the Brett part of this interview. We're done with the Brett, but we get done.
You can get a cup of tea, sit back, and 20 minutes from now. Yeah, I'll be after a thing.
How old were you two? Because you were both – how old were you two when you were – I got an SNL,l and i had kind of regular fame it was in the 80s but then i had wayne's world got an emmy for doing political impressions anyway i'm just saying everything whooshed up and i was on the cover of rolling stone so for that year i it was peak fame and i found it It was basically exhausting because I'm kind of a people pleaser,

and so anyone who wanted to give me the time of the, well, sure.

I think David, right?

It's David.

I think David would have a different journey.

Mine was very gradual, Brett, because stand-up, middle act, wasn't even a headliner when I got on SNL. Did an HBO, like, young comedian special, so I got a drop of attention.
But got on SNL, but didn't do that much for a while. Dana kind of came out of the gate big, and I took a while.
And then leaving that, and then then a movie and then another movie. I think it was after SNL, after some movies and then a sitcom called Just Shoot Me and then I got the cover Rolling Stone.
And the cover Rolling Stone is a very hard one over here. I don't, especially if you're a comedian.
So I feel like that was when people say, when were you the most famous? It's such a weird question. And it's always right now because it's accumulation of everything kind of, or people finally caught up to stuff, but that was probably the year.
Cause you don't get that a lot if ever again. So I really felt like that was a fun one.
And Dana got one, um, maybe I too, I don't know, but. Is this a way you two are best friends because you can only be both on the cover of Rolling Stone is that the part of the club and uh if you get on there we're gonna be hanging out a lot well I'm just curious how are you how's the recognition factor in different countries like Great Britain uh compared to Ireland or you know because Lasso is Lasso or Ted I like to shorten the show Ted is global so that's a different thing so where are you the most I mean there was like the first year we were only recognized in America but then I think the second year it then was it's sort of I haven't, yeah, it's sort of everywhere because I think it's because it's on Apple.

Yeah. But then I think the second year it then was, it's sort of, I haven't, yeah, it's sort of everywhere because I think it's because it's on Apple.

Yeah.

It's like, I mean, I haven't checked.

Did England take any, was there any different feeling than America?

America was just sheer joy and bliss.

Was England because you were there and you're English, is there any different?

I thought English people wouldn't take to Ted Lasso because it's,

uh,

sincere.

So I,

I thought.

Is that not what plays over there?

No,

I,

you know,

I thought they were going to be like,

you fucking prick,

you sincere prick.

Oh,

you're so fucking earnest.

Yeah. Oh, I don't like that show.
you're so fucking earnest yeah oh yeah i don't like that show you're so fucking earnest is it a lot of comedy is more uh insincere well yeah or or uh negative like as in uh taking the piss out of people i'll tell you what was a really interesting thing that happened that i learned is I did this show that no one ever saw. It was like an improvised sitcom with David Hasselhoff where David Hasselhoff came to England and we were like his fake entourage.
Half the record. Half the record, yeah.
And it was really funny. No one ever saw it.
It was proper funny. But what was interesting about it is he, as the american we were like improvising these scenes and he came to us one day and he said guys he said they're making you look like idiots and and i we were like yeah no it's okay it's okay because oh was he worried about you guys looking stupid in a mockumentary and it's okay because because we're in that's the joke it's meant to be funny like as in he wanted us all to be heroes and i was like that's such an interesting like oh right it's funnier that you guys are all well you guys gave us uh monty python you know so it's kind of like um doesn't get any better than that but i do think uh first i've it's philosophical alert no ted lasso even for america the earnestness of it the sincerity of it took us off guard you know right you yeah because i people told me to watch it i go what lasso i don't know i was like kind of like i don't i would sit on peach channel for no so then i watched it and i started seeing it and it was uh the chemistry and it you know i'm not gonna say lightning in a bottle i'm not gonna say that because i don't want to speak in cliches might be.
A great show is when every single person in the cast is the only person you can imagine playing that part. And Ted Lasso had that across the board, in my opinion.
That's very nice. I feel the same way about Just Shoot Me.
Can I ask you? Is that a callback? Did it make it over there? Oh, you saw the show? Yeah, yeah. It was on Late Night in England.
It was on BBC 1285. It was on BBC 1285.
Still getting the checks, eh? Shit. God, I'm glad you saw it just shoot me.
It gives me some legitimacy on this call. Thank God.
Yeah. Tell me this.
I want to know about you two. Have you done stand-up or shows in England? No.
I've been invited, but never lined up. But I...
How does... I don't know if it would work.
Why are you scared? We are scared. I'm scared, for sure.
Why won't you come? They'd love you. I don't.

I just don't know if my shit would work.

My favorite city.

I've been there several times.

I love everything about it.

The West End, you know.

Eiffel Square.

Yeah.

Eiffel Square.

Now all the biggies, the pyramids.

Leicester Square.

This is, you know,

okay,

I have to ask,

these are just

arithmetic questions,

but so,

you got this special

that's coming out

in a couple weeks.

Second best time

to your life.

I like the title.

That's a good title.

Always hard to get a title.

Yeah.

Spade's got one coming out

called Dandelion.

Always hard.

Good title.

I saw the trailer

and the title was explained

in the trailer and I was like, respect respect Yeah, because I'm a puss No one would guess that Where did you shoot the special? Oh, in New Jersey Oh, really? Yeah, yeah At the Bergen Theatre, did you? At the PAC. Okay.
In Bergen. And how many people? It was 2,000? Two shows one night? Two shows one night.
Love it. So pre-pandemic, you're playing clubs.
Is that right? Yeah. Clubs and like 50-seaters.
Kind of my favorite size. You can't make money, but I like a 50 seater.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? So then now your life has just went this last five years.
It really did. But I think I was sort of – this is what I'm asking when you – what age you were because I was quite – I was 38 when I did LASA, I think.
Okay. I'd been doing all of this at a low level for a long, long time.
So I think, I just didn't expect any of it. But then when it happened, it was like, well, I'll be dead soon.
So I made the most of it. I think it must be nice to go.
That's the title of your next special. Yeah.
If you're 38 and you're doing pretty well, and you probably go, it probably would have happened by now. And the odds get higher that, I mean, you can be famous, but then to have a game changer is very rare.
Exactly. Yeah.
I'd long given up on sort of a big thing happening. Yeah.
I i got snl at 31 i'd been in the clubs for 10 years and i'd auditioned for snl several times in clubs and just thought it was sort of over a lot of things had to come together they were recasting and long story short i got it at 31 And then the show was really on a low point.

But it happened to be the shit we had to rescue.

Let's just take this guy.

We can't lose.

It wasn't easy.

I thought I was going to turn the lights out because every pilot I'd ever done, every show I'd ever done, it failed.

It sucked.

So I didn't want to turn.

Oh, you can turn it out now.

Okay.

That's 8H.

Dana, turn the light out on the way out.

You fucked the entire franchise.

What else have you got? So I was around that age,

36, when I started to

make extra money and be

extra famous.

I found it. It's a Faustian

deal in some ways over time.

Do you

have a financial planner, kid?

He's got a printing press. I would say you this, and I don't think I've ever expressed this.
I'll just do it very quickly. Is that at some point you want a wall of money that's giving you income, not risky investments, not real estate, but liquidity bonds or something that is giving you a wall of income.
So in 10 years from now, you never go on bend a deed. You never have to do anything you don't want to do.
Your career so far seems like you're in command and control because you're the executive producer, you're the writer. You wouldn't have those issues, but whatever money you think you want, you just want to be completely done by 50.
So you have nine years years okay i'm i'm gonna play back this podcast and i'm gonna have to write out what you just said because you lost me at bonds well well it doesn't matter about bonds mailbox money just money that comes in when you're not working so that you can pick and choose um your projects that's all but i think you already you're doing your most stand-ups just do stand-up and try to get hired you're i mean you got a big deal with warner i mean you're already in charge i think you're doing perfect i take back what i said you don't need my advice i really i'm listening to all of it as a small biz owner you don't have the luxury of clocking out early. This is very true.
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Sure. And that's hard to have a chemistry and match.
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I have a question for you both about SNL that I'm curious about. Because I've spoken to Bill Hayder and I've spoken to Jason and I've spoken to a couple of other people and everyone tells me.
When I spoke to Bill Hayder, I said to him how he was making Barry at the time and he was like writing, execing, directing, producing, all of it. And I said, how do you cope with the pressure of that? That's such a huge, huge undertaking.
And he said, anything's easier after SNL. Oh, wow.
And I wonder if you two feel this way. Like the machine of SNL seems to me so fucking insanely stressful and sort of the ego of it week by week that you could be in a sketch, then you're not in a sketch and you're the king for a night, then it's gone.
And then week on week, how do you, how did you feel about that? You know, Bill, who's one of the greats of SNL, uh, we all love, um, I think maybe what he's saying is that at that point you're on the upswing and you're trying to get to a level where you're not going to give up on showbiz. Everything's going on.
You've all been in that position. We've all been where, am I going to do this forever? Because I'm just barely, barely making it.
And that's the stress of SNL. You're going to get fired every year.
No one's treated preferentially, really. And you keep writing and keep proving yourself with barry maybe which sounds so such a hard undertaking is he's already got to this point and he's been given something and now it's just not fun but fun and hard but maybe maybe there's something i can't imagine something that hard um snl was horrible but it's in the past but the new thing would seem harder.
Like, okay, it's right in front of me. I got to make this work, which luckily he did.
Dana, what do you think? Well, I would say all that is true. It's an emotionally violent sport, SNL.
But over time, if you write your own sketches and get some friends together, it might help out it's coming from you and then there's no time for someone to over think it was great for my add brain there was no real direction you direct yourself the directors are trying to get the shots by the seat of their pants and so it you're a master of your fate in some ways there There's whimsy to that. But then you have control.

And so when I walked off, I didn't have the confidence. I was being offered multi-millions to do a couple of films that were complete mistakes.

Because then going from complete control to no control, 100 takes, they edit the way they want.

I did this thing in a scene which I thought, okay, I nailed this.

I looked at the monitor, saw it in the film.

It's been cut to pieces.

What I love... takes they edit the way they want i did this thing in a scene which i thought okay i nailed this i looked at the monitor saw it in the film it's been cut to pieces what i love about your resume so far is that you're not you're bill hater bill hater bet on himself they he could have made a stefan movie let's just say 15 million sure he could have stayed at snl or done another variety show he bet on himself he just said no and now he's like he's like, he's a, he's a Cohen brother or he's Kubrick.
He can do what he wants. The second or he's a Paul Thomas.
So what you're doing is already fantastic. You're, you're making shows, you're in control.
And the only time I've been really unhappy in show business, like truly unhappy is being on a set or in a project where you look over at the brain trust around the around the camera and you're like oh we're fucked yeah this is not gonna work right away it's not working so just just do what you've been doing is you are you're you're in charge of your you know so far this podcast is really uh lovely so thank you very much right we're gonna transcribe it don't let them dangle a shiny arm you make it so far, this podcast is really lovely. So thank you very much.
We're going to transcribe it. Don't let them dangle a shiny arm.
You make it so popular that you're tempted to do some movie. You don't want to do because all of a sudden it's whatever cartoon money would be, you know, and it wouldn't, the money is only about freedom.
The only reason to have money from my mind is to have freedom, freedom to work or not work freedom to how to work. the way i'll just ask you do you have shiny things that speak to you like watches cars do you live which is totally fine that's the again the beauty of it is i don't i never i always made enough before this all happened i always made just enough i made enough to pay rent.
I made enough to go to the cinema, which I like doing it.

And I made enough for black T-shirts, which is all I wear.

That was it.

And so when all this happened, look at us.

Oh, God, all I need is a cover of Rolling Stone and we can be a gang.

I can't afford that shit.

Why, this one might be. I have a stupid regular shirt on.

Oh, I have a good question for him, Dana. Watch this.
Watch this. That's good.
Fastball coming in. Okay.
Brent. That's your real name, Brent.
Brent. So, Brent.
It's Brent. If England is doing an SNL.
Yeah, they are, right? England is doing SNL, Dana. Did you know this? Yeah.
Yes, I did read about that. That's a big story.
We haven't talked about it enough. Yeah.
Obviously, I don't think you would want to be on it as a cast member, but what are your thoughts about that? That sounds right. Because I was thinking, what's the equivalent of SNL over there? And then I just thought, oh, wait, I think they're doing one.
They're doing one. They just announced it.
Yeah. I think there are so many fucking great sketch comedians and comedians in England that it could be amazing.
I think for years years everyone has tried to do an snl and failed at it so i think making an actual snl might be the answer instead of a knockoff yeah instead of going like sunday morning i've recorded like they're always trying right right right and i've noticed i think what they've always made the mistake of is they go to like the Edinburgh festival and they find a sketch group and another sketch group who aren't friends, don't know each other. And they go, they sort of mix and match random people.
Whereas I think if they go to the groups that are, that have chemistry and have built something and put them in stuff and give them some autonomy i think it could be amazing it could be but i think that's a good observation i think on snl john lovitz when i was there knew phil hartman and jan hooks knew these writers and there was a a chemistry that started right away um yeah you need it right away you because that first viewing, people will be like, is this any good? That's the pressure. They don't go, you know what, we'll get it gelled around show 15 and they're like, we're gone.
So that's the scary part, the pressure. Get it right, right away.
And if you have people that work together, that would help. Like they come in with something.
You've got to have a, it's such a weird thing.

It's such an ephemeral thing,

but I like SNL because it's like the Muppet show, right?

It is a gang show,

and it is the chemistry of-

Dana was Fozzie Bear for sure.

It's a sporting event,

but the thing about it being live

is that it's obliterated all the competition.

We used to have so many,

mostly tape,

but variety shows were huge, I assume in England as well, in the 60s and 70s, early 80s. Now they've all disappeared.
I tried one in primetime. Martin Short did.
All disappeared. There is no live 90-minute comedy show with a really cool band and maybe a movie star or a football player you know, stay to that.
Have an athlete host.

Just do all that.

But you guys, between Ricky Gervais, I'll just leap around here,

Peter Sellers, of course, and I already mentioned Monty Python.

It's one of your biggest exports, you know, is comedy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it's – I'd be really interested if they fuck it up.

I don't know the backness of it. As in, if Lauren's involved, I don't know.
Like if it's like. Would they ship a Tina Fey over to help get it going? Would they do, you know, I don't know what extent they would be involved, you know, because it's a very complicated show to do.
And there's got to be some shortcuts of people that have done it forever that can help alleviate the full on stress. It would be, would you guys? Yeah, let's go.
I would go. No, I don't think I'm good enough.
Dana might be good. Dana should be the first host to sort of tie it all together.
I would go. I would just stay with, I mean, there's two lanes of that show.
One, one lane is that you're seeing some unknown people, comedians come on the show. And so you're watching them evolve and you're kind of rooting for them and seeing them get, find the audience, get more confident.
And that is a reality show. So when the show bombs, so to speak, it should just as interesting as when it kills because it's live.
Oh, this sketch is bombingmy. And, and, you know, it's kind of fun for the audience.
Jake is the guest host and he's really, he's horrible, right? Oh yeah. He could be the first guest host too.
Sorry, Dana, you're pushed out your second week. And then an athlete or someone who's never done comedy in their life is forced to do sketch comedy.
So if they do it great,

that's another secret sauce.

You have a lot of those over there.

You could do that.

Those are two.

And then constantly have Paul McCartney sing.

Let it be.

Every week.

And J-Lo.

Yeah.

Every week.

Oh,

to promote the movie.

We got to hurry up and get this SNL going though.

Tell me, have you, what do you, what's your like secret when you're bombing? If the sketch isn't working, what are you doing? Do you feel terrible when it's happening? No date is bombing if he's on stage. Well, Will Ferrell famously, no, I could easily, that show can go south in a second, you know, because it's so under rehearsed and live.
The audience can be weird. Will Ferrell is famously the most like if a sketch starts to bomb, his commitment goes up exponentially.
Goes harder, yeah. And so, yeah, you just sort of, it's all madness, but it's very much under-rehearse,

and there's rewrites right before you go on, and you're going to get it right off the cue card. But that's what gives it this chemistry, this excitement.
And Live from London just sounds funny to me. It's a little bit like The Clash, London calling.
Maybe that should be the theme, but live from London! You know, it's like, is there any other town it could be from out there? Live from Liverpool. Live from Birmingham! It has to be London.
London calling. Yeah, you're frozen with a thumbs up like you're really pleased about it.
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We've been doing that for years. Yes.
And it's really the premise of, and I did think about it, movies that affected you. It's like the film that made you cry the most, the film that scared you the most, the sexiest.
Exorcist scared me the most. Yeah.
2001, a space odyssey at 13 in a Cinerama dome in Seattle. Ble blew my mind basically didn't know didn't have any precursor like what is this about and everything about that movie i actually a few years ago they were gonna they did the 50th whatever anniversary and i saw it six times over two months at the arc light theater in la it's just kind of spiritual experience.
Yeah. It's a meditative experience.
And I don't know why Kubrick, how he kind of does that. What is the secret of the off kilter acting? And the casualness, they're getting the sandwich in the spaceship and all they know is this thing's better.

There's some magic to that film for sure.

I think it's a wonderful life.

I don't know why, but even if I bring this up in casual conversation, I get choked up.

He's back.

He's back.

We're talking about It's a Wonderful Life.

Talking about movies.

Oh, yeah.

It's where they say that his life, the angel, he sees what it'd be like if he wasn't born. And then he's euphoric and the townspeople show up and someone says to his character, we heard George Bailey was in trouble.
That always stuck with me. We heard, and I've always teared up about that when I bring it up.
You don't tear up now. I could a little bit.
You are. There's something about that, you know? So what about you? What, I just, what movie? Yeah.
Start crying. What's, what scared you the most besides Tommy boy? You see the, did you see the exorcist? I did see, you know what? I saw the exorcist when I was young and I thought it was stupid.
And then I watched it. You got scared later.
Yeah. I got scared like a year ago when I watched it.
I was like, Oh my God, that is so scary. I didn't think it was scary when I was little.
I would never watch that. How old were you when they saw it? I was like six.
And I was like, this stupid little guy with my spitting head. That That's just this bullshit.
That's interesting. Dana, ask him about.
I will. Because I'm too embarrassed.
Ask him when he did that audition, which he's probably talked about for Ted Lasso. Did you film it alone in your room? I have to hear every goddamn detail.
It's so funny. Well, just set the table for your writer on Ted Lasso.
There's a part you're thinking. Maybe I'm a writer on Ted Lasso.
I love it. I know you've probably told us.
It's the best thing you've ever done. Embellish it this time.
Let's get some details. Give us extra.
I will give you. I'll give you one extra detail.
I don't usually give you. We're writing it.
I get the thought that I think I could do Roy Kent, but I know not a single person in the room is thinking that everyone. And I know that if I say it out loud, everyone will be like embarrassing.
I love it. Embarrassing.
You know, it would be good for this. Yeah.
That's how you start. If we can't find anyone, I don't think we can actually super talented.
You know, what if he has really big eyebrows? Just a thought. Put it out there.
Put it out there. Anyway, I wait till we finish writing.
And then I make a self-tape. But what I did with the self-tape, I went to Mosaic, which is my manager's office.
And they like do... Oh, in LA? Yeah, yeah.
It was in LA. So that's's where we're oh okay and uh and you know i don't know if you've done this but they have like whoever the assistants are at the time they can read in with you and they can all right so i did my scenes with this norwegian guy who was like an intern so the scenes I'm acting with Keely in the original self tape,

it's,

it's me going like Keely and Keely's like,

hello.

And not even an actor.

Yeah.

A sort of deadpan Norwegian man was playing.

And,

and I recorded five scenes and I flew back to England. like i finished my contract and i flew back to england and when i got on the plane i sent bill lawrence the tape and i said thanks for everything i said look i've been thinking i could play roy kemp but i appreciate that no one's thinking this this is really embarrassing if this is shit i will never ask you about it.
We can pretend this never happened. But if this is good, here's the tape.
And then when I landed, it was like an overnight flight. When I landed, I got an email saying, this is fucking awesome.
I'm going to send it to you. Oh, really? Wow.
Well, I want to have a question about this. Because the character that you play in, like, we're going to need to know you now.
So you really did, like, the body language is so funny and interesting of Roy Kent, you know. And also, obviously, you went lower, a little more gravelly, and he's sort of an alpha-alpha type character, you know.
So did you have that in the audition tape or did that evolve as you kind of got on the set? I think I had the posture in the tape because I knew he was all based on a load of things, but I knew he was like a guy who had been told since little shoulders back, head forward, like he'd been told that and that he was leading, like he's ready to headbutt someone at all times so he's leading but the voice the voice was like halfway there in the in the self-tape i think and they wanted you to play it up no i just felt right once i was there with once you're sort of faced with, it's funny because, you know,

I'd done this tape with a Norwegian guy in a room,

but then suddenly there's 20 men and you have to be.

Super.

Yeah.

Oh, tougher.

Dominant.

Yeah.

So what was the line?

I mean, what did he say?

Something had to happen.

I think it was in the audition tape and in the show.

Or I'm going to start punching something. Yeah.
silence where I'm going to start punching dicks. And how would Roy, you don't have to do the carrot.
You want me to do it? I feel like you're impressed with it. You're very good at it.
I don't know. I don't know.
Now you got me on the spot. I use that line when I'm waiting too long at Cheesecake.
We've got to be silent in here. I'm going to start punching dicks.
I line them up you're fucking dick so you get to swear balls are next i remember sandler did a movie sorry uh with paul thomas anderson i go god you're so good in that he goes carvey i got to swear you know so fun so you're you're yourself you're on the phone what the fuck and so your character how many swear words per episode are you allotted someone did count it i think it's in the hundreds it's in the hundreds season you got a real enora on your hands what about do you swear in your stand-up i don't even remember yes i do yeah oh boy oh i found that interesting when when i started doing gigs in america like smaller gigs when i was first coming out here and they'd be like do you have a clean set and i was like what's a clean set that's so true division in england we just it's just done as like everyone's dirty. Yeah.
But it's also like, what do you mean a clean set? Isn't this an adult evening out? Right. But some clubs want to clean.
That's funny. Or some headliners, if you, when I used to open a middle, they'd say, keep it clean.
And I'm like, huh? So I always sort of looked at a clean tip because you were also eyeballing doing letterman or doing a late night show and you had to be clean. So your manager would say, you're wasting it because you can't do that bit.
And I'm like, right. With the level of what you can do on a late night talk show is kind of, but so what's the, as far as your special coming out, what's the, what's the bit that is the bluest? We call it blue.
I've got a five-minute bit about the C-word and how America is scared of it. Oh, Brett.
Oh, my mom just called. She goes, oh, you don't need that.
We know that about... My mom doesn't like my own act.
I like Dana. He's clever and he's fun.
I'm nice and clean and cheerful. Oh, you know, come on.
Are you clean? You're clean? You're stand-up clean? Dana? Nice clean boy? For the most part, there's certain jokes that's kind of, you know, where the punchline is fuck you or use this fuck. Right.
And then I go, okay. And Jerry Seinfeld doesn't like that.
Try to rewrite it where you don't need the word, you know. What do you need it for? You're not listening.
Was that Seinfeld? It was Seinfeld with a little garbo in the back. Fucking Eeyore.
Yeah. We also both do corporate gigs, me and Dana.
And when they say do an hour do 45 minutes and keep it clean that's another way we work and uh if like i watch dana on these we do them together sometimes he's not 100 clean but you don't even notice it the whole tone the whole vibe is like fun and it's really because they they said, one guy told me, he goes, we just say that because Martin Lawrence did 20 minutes on eating pussy. And I'm like, oh, okay, well.
We get where the line is now. That's where the line.
Okay, I get. So somewhere under, yeah, I got it.
But that's what they're fearful of. Something happened once where people complain and you go, I got it.
You won't even notice I'm dirty. It's like so goofy.
My goal is to get them to laugh at minutia that's been wound down into madness and get them to go with that for an extended period of time. And that's its own sort of pornographic, you know, I mean, you must have bits in your act that maybe you get more laughs than you think they deserve or less laughs or ones that you think are the most challenging for the audience in the sense of how abstract they are or, you know, everything is all the above.

That's very interesting. I guess, yes, there would be stuff I wouldn't do if it were a corporate gig for sure.
But I still am like, I think I just fundamentally object to the idea of here is uh 200 adults in a room and because it's corporate they don't want anything rude like i'm like can they handle it it's like yes you can handle it children i'm like but they're still people i think they'll probably really enjoy it i do yeah i want to do 10 minutes on eating pussy i do get Yeah Everybody has that bit We've all got that

In our back pocket really enjoy it. I do get, I want to do 10 minutes on eating pussy.
I do get, yeah. Hands up.

I'll get that.

Everybody has that bit.

We've all got that.

The audience wants it unbridled,

but there's always people.

There's the CEO,

the company,

and then there's the people who've been hired.

And so they're just don't want to offend one person,

but the audience by and large,

they're adults in America in 2025. What if they haven't heard? Yeah.
Yeah. It's about people complaining, getting sued and saying, I was so offended.
I was shaking. It's like, oh, because of Brett's filthy act? Who cares? I couldn't stop thinking about eating pussy after that call.
I couldn't stop. I couldn't start doing it again.
It's not too late to drop in a bit, go to the comedy store and just insert it into your special and just say, I don't know why I thought of this. But when you tape this, which I think is out now, April 26th, I believe.
So I think it's out now because we don't know what day it is today. Oh, we don't know what day it is.
Sorry. I think it's out we'll see but brett is there did you i just did mine and all you want to do is have one of your best crowds i mean they're obviously coming to see you but the cameras sometimes throw people and it turns into a pretty good crowd yeah how was yours tell me me the truth.
Mine was, I did two.

I did the same kind of thing. Two, one night.

I think when you're Sandler and you've got

an almost unlimited budget,

he was just taping almost everywhere he went.

Small, big, really thought

out. He pictured

it like a movie and I think PTA was involved

in one of them and maybe

the Safdies. So,

he's got a lot going on and a lot of fun and it the Safdies. So he's got a lot going on

and a lot of fun and it's

fucking great. So

I'm doing the more

common two a night. But yeah,

I went to Denver, which is a great comedy

town. And I

did come out. The last one I did,

the crowd was tougher, but they were masked.

And I wasn't sure of that. And when I went out, they sounded they sounded muffled, which was a good, you know, they were wearing masks.
You know what they said? We can do it in Minneapolis. Austin says no.
And they said, Netflix isn't agreeing to do it with Austin because the parameters, but the parameters were, they wouldn't wear masks. And I didn't know what the parameters were.
I go, Oh, but we can still do it. They it they go yeah we'll just do your next gig in a minneapolis we'll just sell two shows and then i was so in the zone about my own shit i was like oh no because the opener wasn't doing as well and i'm like do not give me a rough crowd tonight please god yes and so uh that was but this one was obviously unmasked and super fun.
So I got lucky.

Also, you have two shows that people don't know.

You're sort of combining the two shows.

Sometimes you use most of one because sometimes you just hit one way better.

What did you do?

More of a combination?

Well, I had that experience.

Everyone had said to me, oh, your special crowds are just there so up for it.

It's going to be amazing.

And then that first crowd, you can tell, right? You can tell by the offstage announcement. Yeah.
Yeah. Anything.
You just walk out. By the cheer.
Yeah. And that first, there was so much stuff and there was so, you know, wires everywhere and there's stuff in the way.
Lights. Cameras pushing around.
Yeah. And I think it does throw them in.
And like the seven o'clock is quite early, you and that was the first show and a little early they're not drunk they're just yeah i did that on stage thing and they went yay and i thought oh all you got was a yay yeah i know that's funny also they bring them in a little earlier for that early show so they're sitting forever i don't think there's booze they don't want to see i mean unless you specifically ask and then they're seated with the technical issues they can't get up use the bathroom and stuff and yeah yeah and then yeah i never have shot one that i felt was anywhere near the sets i did before that but practice set the late show was show was an excellent crowd. Then I was like, okay, we're good.
We've got something with it. Did you use most of that? They were really good.
They were both very good. I'm very grateful to all of them.
Yeah, of course. I'm grateful anyone shows up.
We did a show in Minneapolis when I toured, and that was the best crowd I've ever met. Oh, see, that's why I

said that'd be a good one. What theater were you in?

The Guthrie?

Paramount, maybe? No, that was Denver.

I'd have to go in my calendar.

No, we'll give you 20 minutes.

Please go find out. Could you give me 35 minutes?

35.

I love when you said you wrote Ted Lasso

in LA. I pictured you in a castle

in England. Anything in England, I feel like

it's a castle. Anything where the

Thank you. I love when you said you wrote Ted Lasso in LA.
I pictured you in a castle in England, anything in England. I feel like it's a castle.
Anything with a British accent seems smarter, more sophisticated. You know, we've seen all your movies, all these years.
I always tell Dana, if I'm famous, I'll go over there. But I was, I went there for one day and I wasn't too sure.
We went for grownups, that movie and uh we all went over there and stayed at the soho what's up there's a gig in london that's the best gig in london called always be comedy the uh man who runs that gig james gill he is obsessed with you david spade i'm telling you off camera i might hit you up and hey, tell me about this thing and I might go do it sometime. He can't believe I'm doing this podcast.
Like he's so excited. He said, get him up, get him to do my gig.
Like you will be very famous in that room. Took you 44 minutes to get to this pitch, but thank you.
And I might hit you up. So unblock me and I'm going to hit you on Instagram and then all my messages flood through once you unblock me I'm like dude I just saw you in the parking lot the improv why did you drive away as I was chasing after you waving I really just have to look at my act like you know you might because I didn't get a chance to hear your whole hour, obviously.
But I have to wonder, the big subjects work overseas. Politics, marriage, relationships.
And when I look at my act, I've got to see what I have to throw out because I just don't know, you know. Well, also, but there's much more, everything's fucking everywhere, right? Now, like, I think the stuff you're scared wouldn't work, would work.
I should just try it and see what happens because I'll blame them. Every, everybody looks at daily mail cause it's crack cocaine for your brain.
They sift through the commercials and try to look at an article. By the way, do you have enough money for Daily Mail Plus?

That's a real question.

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So by the way, you're doing a movie with Jennifer Lopez currently, right? Yes. Yeah, we're filming at the moment, yeah.
Do you know what it's called? I do. You tell me.
It's called Office Party. Office Romance? Office Romance.
Office? Yeah. It's called Office Schmaufus.
Meet you at the office. What's it called? Meet you at the office? It's called Office.
Yeah. So is it a rom-com? Be honest.
It's a rom-com. Nice.
It's a big, cool rom-com. So this is you stepping outside the lines unless you wrote and produced this film.
No, I did. I did co-write this with Jay Kelly.
And do you play Roy Kent in this? This is a lot of people are asking. No.
Okay. He plays Ted Lasso.
He plays Ted. I play Keely Jones in this one.
J-Lo in my brief encounters with her is quite sweet and funny. Is this true? She's so funny.
She's very, very funny. She's.
Brilliant comedy actor.

Like when you see her live, I'm like, fucking hell, you're good at this.

She's a really, really good comic actor.

So you, wait, you just said you wrote it with your friend.

Is that what you said?

Yes, Joe Kelly.

And so you get that, get it on its feet.

Yeah.

And then you figure out who's the leading lady, who's the rest of it, where you shoot. That's all you're in on all that.
That's great. Yeah.
Yeah. We wrote it on a, on a train where I was making Ted Lasso.
We sort of had the idea. Did you think of calling it office train? We did.
We thought of office station. Yeah.
You could all do it. It could all be played on the train how did you try to make it spin how'd you spin it because it is a genre what's the uh sort of rough pitch yeah the hook is i suppose i can't tell you much but i can tell you the aim is it's like a really proper classy old school rom-com like a noraron Type film But Okay With hard R jokes Oh okay Oh good Good Got it That Any aliens And aliens Okay good That's another good hook Is it too late For David to do A nice little cameo.
He walks in.

What about the guy that steals the girls? Is that partaken?

That's me, dude.

What else could you

bring at this very late stage?

That's it. That's my only move.

The good-looking,

dashing dude runs

in and she glances

at me and sprints

toward me.

I didn't know about this guy. He on the planet bye-bye so i think rom-com with r-rated is interesting i can't really think of one so i like that idea yeah i um yeah i sounds more real yes hopefully i think it's gonna be I like that.
Yeah. So.
Yes, hopefully. I think it's going to be good.
I like that. Yeah.
So of your two children, Ted Lasso and Shrinking, which one's your favorite? Get off my couch. Get off my couch, Chewy.
I'm not Chewy. I'm Brett.
You're Chewy to me. That's Harrison Ford, if you don show and I love Harrison Ford.
He's my wife. You can't see our shaking fingers.
That's a big part. I know.
No one gets mad like Harrison Ford. He's so good, man.
He's my wife. Chewy, your tics got in my soup again Chewy, get me out of here Shut the fuck up, Chewy He should be Chewy-Doo Like Scooby-Doo.
Like a collab. So we're entertaining, Brett.
Chewy had sex with Scooby. Oh, I guess I'll give up.
You can go anywhere you want. You're going to play Hercules, potentially.
You did a cameo, and now you're in the Marvel universe. Well, I mean, gun to head.
I can't say anything, but at the same time, I think that's probably it on that one. Okay.
I like gun to head. Because I thought, what's the difference between Hercules and Roy Kent? One is a Greek god, and the other one is a hairy guy from Tooting.
Yeah. From Tooting.
That's a good answer. No, what is it called? What's your favorite soccer team called Tottenham or something? Tottenham, yeah.
How do you know that? Okay. Who have you been speaking to? I did talk to my soccer buddy, Bobby, and I said, because I have a Tottenham shirt.
Oh, do you? Yeah. I don't even know why, but, oh, he gave it to me.
And so I wear it, And if people ask me one question, I fall apart. So I just like to puff up.
Is Brendan Hunt dating Hannah Wannington? Are you reading that off the internet? Is Brendan Hunt dating Rebecca? Oh, Rebecca. That's right.
No, no, Hannah Wannington is her real name. Is Brendan Huntating Rebecca Wadding? Do you mean, hang on, what's the question? I don't know.
He doesn't know. He's reading the internet or something.
I'm looking for, I've got, well, who's the bad apple in the bunch in that cast? In Ted Lasso. Oh, he's the difficult one.
No, you said in Ted Lasso, is that what you're saying? Yeah. Who's the bad apple in the cast? There genuinely isn't one, and I know that's an annoying answer, but I don't think...
Who's the most difficult to work with? Go ahead. Dana on this podcast is the most out of us two.
Juno Temple is coming back to play Keeley Jones, right? Oh, right. It's coming back.
That's correct, yes. I believe so.
Guns ahead. Is there a girl named Keeley on the show? Yes.
Keeley, yeah. And there's someone named Keeley? She's the love interest.
There are people in the world called Keeley, yeah. I don't know.
Is that a common name over there? There's not one person here named Keeley. Really? You have no Keeleys? Zero.
Oh, we got a couple of Keeleys. Yeah, you got too many.
Were the negotiations tough to get the cast to come back, or were you guys locked into a certain salary already? Oh, wow. We'd all signed contracts in the early days, forever and ever.
So they pick up? Yeah, I think so. Oh, that's good.
Makes it easier. Yeah.
Saves time. How long did you do just shoot me how many years was that that was uh all's in your court well we did six as a mid-season replacement they call it out here and then we went straight through the old days was 22 episodes a year so we did about a little over six years my god 48 did you i love it went over there? Is that what you saw it over there? Yeah, I saw it in England.
Oh, I love it. Love it.
Did you, what was your trajectory on that show in terms of enjoyment? Did you always enjoy it? Was there a bit in the middle where you were like, I've had enough of this and then you enjoyed it again or what? No, you know, I came from SNL and it was options like Dana said, you could do your own show like the David Spade goofy sitcom. But I had seen that if it didn't work, all your heat's gone.
They don't give you another try. So it was an ensemble, a writer from Larry Sanders, Steve Levitan and a good cast and the network already liked it.
I joined, they added me to a shot pilot. So we reshot it and added me because NBC was a little fuzzy on, they were on the, you know, back and forth with it.
So I got added to it and I liked it the whole run. I have to say that it was one of the most fun runs because everyone, they were writing for me, which at SNL was not exactly the case.
They did in some some but you were sort of in charge of it and then you've got everywhere you go is good people like on your show i'm sure and that's always more fun and then um also it was a little easier than snl the hours and uh and it was immediately in a top 20 or top 10 and we were in a in a heyday of Seinfeld and ER and Will and Grace and Friends and Frasier and so we we were at least in the vicinity we weren't those shows but we were with them on the lot with them and it was just all fun to see just a good run I loved it we and the last thing and then I'll let you talk at the very end is we had done, everyone had had something in their career was good and bad. And so everyone was really happy to be there and lucky and appreciated.
And I think some shows people get cocky because it's their first show and it works. And so they get sort of out of control, but we were like, we're every year're every year we got picked up we're like this is so great because it could all go down to shit everyone knew it what was your last day like tearjerker of course bawling um if i knew we were going to do it again in a year that would have been fun for me yeah but um i guess yours isn't really a reboot because it's sort of just keep going right yeah there's been a big gap and then we'll don't tell us any secrets but you got bill lawrence who's great coach is the women's team that got out ted does so it makes it sort of puts a spin on he's not nodding or shaking his head he's giving us us nothing.
I've got a gun to my head, remember?

I know.

I think this is the good thing about Marvel also is they don't even say when they're releasing their movies anymore.

It's smart.

They say we did a big one last week.

You guys missed it.

And we're like, you're too secretive about it.

All right. What else?

Good.

What else for this young man, Dana?

I know you had a lot, but we got to let him go.

And we appreciate you, by the way, Brett, you're shooting a movie. You come in on the weekend.
You help us out. We wanted to talk to you for a while, so thank you very much.
I appreciate you both very much, and I'm genuinely grateful I got to hang out with you. This is very cool for me, so thank you for your time.
I want you to see me in better lighting, but that'll be, you know. It's fun to see someone on TV playing a character character you know and then meeting you like this it's it's just interesting because all i knew was that you know character yeah um so it's uh i see why you won the emmys compliment alert good job compliment alert sorry uh back to back yeah it's a super compliment but anyway i mean i I't it's your podcast films to be buried with you know and you have time you should both come and do it one day I would love to have you but no pressure there's nothing worse than being asked to do a podcast you're off the hook I'll do that one in a second I could talk about movies all day long you know but I want to know the movie before we go for you

that moved you the most

well

I talked about

E.T. I find traumatic

like I cried the most

like I remember my dad

taking me and my sister

there was like a re-release of E.T.

and I was three, four, I don't know four, five he took us to see E.T. at the cinema and he was like a re-release of et and i was three four i don't know four five he took us to see et at the cinema anyways like you're gonna love this and we were crying so much that i remember turning to him and saying why have you brought us to this yeah yeah like what is this this feels like abuse this is not there's no fun here i'm devastated it is It is pretty rough.
If you're younger, I loved E.T. I'll be right here.
I have the same build as E.T. You know, Brad, not to point my special, I talk about E.T.
of all fucking movies. Of all movies.
It's so random you say that. But that one did kind of rough me up too i i get it i mean those movies like that or like bambi when you're not ready for the beginning part and you're like why on who cleared this you know what my friend roisin conaty if you don't know she's a fucking brilliant comedian in England.
And her father died.

And she once said to me, you know, Disney always has these films where the parent dies and things like that. And people say it's good for kids because it teaches them about death.
She said that when her dad died, not for a second did she think, well, thank God I saw a family. No shit.
That's a really funny line. You're like, hey, your mom might die when when you're 70 but we'll let you know what it feels like when you're six yeah that that was cruel all right buddy i would say yeah um you're doing good i don't know if you need any more plugs other than your specials out, Shrinkings coming season two, Ted Lasso season four,

and everything else.

Your podcast, how do you find time to do it?

Do you guys do more than one a day?

Do you stack them?

No, I just do it.

I do it the week.

I don't like free time.

I go, I get.

No, you like to keep it busy.

I get deep, deep darkness if there's any space.

So I just fill it up.

Got it.

Huh. Well, that's a whole other podcast we'll have you yeah exactly yeah anyway anyway anyway lovely to see you guys hey great death and darkness coming soon severely depressed but ted lasso is coming out uh jason sudeikis will cheer you up anyway uh tell jason hello and and good luck with everything with the movie.
Thank you for having me. We'll see you around campus.
This has been a presentation of Odyssey. Please follow, subscribe, leave a like, a review.
All this stuff, smash that button, whatever it is, wherever you get your podcasts. Fly on the Wall is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, and Heather Santoro.

The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman.