Kevin Nealon pt 2

This episode is brought to you by Ring cameras and doorbells.

A lot happens while you're away from home. That's why Ring makes it easy to check in from anywhere.
Whether you're saying hi to an unexpected guest, making sure those packages are safe, or keeping your pets company while you're out grabbing groceries, it's all a few taps away right from your phone. Be there with Ring.
Explore cameras, doorbells, alarm kits, and more right now at ring.com. This is a message from sponsor Intuit TurboTax.
Taxes was waiting and wondering and worrying if you were going to get any money back and then waiting, wondering, and worrying some more. Now Taxes is matching with a TurboTax expert who can do your taxes as soon as today.
An expert who gives your taxes their undivided attention as they work on your return while you get real-time updates on their progress so I might sound a little different. I don't want to frighten the children.
Keep them away from their screen. But you were still funny.
We just did Kevin Nealon, and Kevin's an old buddy and just one of the group. And what a crack up, always throwing away lines.
Any time you talk to him, whether it's on this or in real life just always funny yeah he's always i mean i met him in san francisco he started coming up doing stand-up where i'm from we're all friends and then the first gag he would do is like he's leaving my kind of apartment or he's in the driveway in his car and he's talking to you like just yeah so anyway whatever in the meantime he is raising up the uh the rolling up his window rolling up the window and he keeps talking and that would be a lot of stuff you call it dry clever acid humor um but yeah he's always dropping these throwaway lines they're really funny he never pushes. And one of the funniest people you'll ever meet.

We were on lights out one time when I had all the weekend update guys on dinner and, and I do a monologue.

And at the end of the monologue, Kevin goes, Hey, uh, cause I would let the,

I would let the guests interrupt my monologue. He goes, Hey, uh,

what are you going to wear for the show tonight?

And I go, I think I'll just wear this. He goes, Oh, okay.
And then there was a bunch of, there was a plant on the table in a little bowl with a bunch of leaves. And I asked him a question during the interview when I sat out and he goes, hey, are you going to finish this salad? And

leaned over to get it.

But all that stupid shit, it sounds like nothing.

And it is. But

it always cracks me up. Yeah, we go over some

SNL stuff and what's going on

with him. It was a fun, easy

podcast to do. Road gigs,

everything. So, talk about

his hiking with Kevin on YouTube.

And he's in the new Happy Gilmore. He'll tell you all about it.
Here he is, Kevin Nealon. I remember when my son was born, we had like a thousand video pictures.
And then as you get older, it was less and less. Just back to me again.
Back to me.

The kid, you're like, I got a feel for you already.

We don't need you too much.

But look at me.

I'm back, everybody.

Back to me.

By the way, Dana, Dana, I was going to tell you, I went to Kevin's house for I think his birthday, maybe.

Is this the house you're in right now, Kevin?

Yeah, it is.

It is.

This place is a decent layout.

Dana, let me tell you, this guy knows what's up.

Thank you. for I think his birthday maybe.
Is this the house you're in right now, Kevin? Yeah, it is. It is.

This place is a decent layout.

Dana, let me tell you, this guy knows what's up.

It's a good crib, man.

It's dope.

Yeah.

It's dope, baby.

It's sick, man.

You've been over here, Spade.

It's sick.

It's sick, man.

It's fire, too.

It's fire.

It's fire.

It's sick.

It's dope.

It's popping.

Some of those stairs.

Oh, I remember I'd hurt my knee.

And I was like, Gervitz, can you carry me down the stairs? You know what you need on your stairs? And this is just if I come over. The little electric chair that goes up the stairs.
We have an elevator. Oh, didn't know that.
We don't let guests use it, though. What's it for? Does that help? It's just for the other staff.

It's staff.

The staff.

Yeah, dude.

Danny, you got a staff out there?

I just think if you have an elevator in your house, it's a sign of good

fortune.

Both of you guys have it. Do you got anyone have an

escalator? Yeah, why do you have an escalator,

Kevin? We have a people mover. It Takes us from the driveway into the house.
But this also serves as a department store. So, you know, we need the elevator.
Oh. It also serves as a flagship store.
I can't remember the name of your show is it off the wall or off flying flying

the wall or flying the coke we don't even we don't know no one knows super fly off the hook i thought it was flying the coke for a long time flying the coke i thought it was flying my soup all right all right let's get started i like this kevin kevin i like when he when he goes, all right. You know, when you're on.
You're like these, like, radio guys. You know, you do those interviews, press, and they start talking.
You don't even know if they're on yet. And you've been talking, giving some really good stuff.
And then they go, okay, let's get started. They go, oh.
Yeah, they go, okay, we're going to patch you through now. Yeah.
Patch me through. You've got two minutes left.
Then you hear honk, honkong kong here we go hey we got kevin and he's so fucking crazy yeah i mean you know it's uh i i remember one time uh i remember one time no i remember one time i was in a tampa and they had one of these DJs or radio personalities. Personalities.
That are just morning zoo kind of guy, high energy. And I go in there and I was going through an AFib episode at the time and my heart was irregular.
And if it goes too long, you got to have it shocked back. And I don't have that anymore.
But at the But at the time I did, and he goes, how do you get rid of it? I said, well, you got to be kind of shocked back, you know, with the paddles. And he goes, oh, that's crazy.
And then like a minute later, he's got an air gun under his desk. He sounds off the air gun.
I almost fell off my chair. Did that work? Did that work? Did that work? Oh, he's trying to actually get you back to life and a medical procedure that could have killed you.
It could have killed me, but on the way back to the hotel, it actually did go back to the regular sinus, as they say. What does that mean? Sinus? It means regular rhythm.
Oh, Dana knows these terms. I don't know.
I'm not steeped in that but i i know people go through

it i that's a good i know the zoo crew messes you up are you steeped in it steeped are you steep

steeped in it you know comprehensive knowledge no isn't that what tea does it steeps

hello anyway i guess so let's go to the phones Anyway. I guess so.
Let's go to the phones.

Let's go to the elevator. Now, Kevin, when you go on gigs, Kevin, you travel a lot.
I travel a lot. Dana travels minimal, but let's say you're on these gigs.
do you sometimes i do press ahead of time or i call to fluff up a gig you know to say hey you know i'm playing at this uh you know indian casino or whatever but do you ever get up anymore like the old days and go in that's sometimes that's hard once in a while it kind of went away for a while you know after the pandemic because you know and now they're slowly bringing it back in hey you know we got 10 seats left you think you could top it off by getting up at four in the morning i know you're on la time zone and stuff but you know really would help get rid of those 10 seats it would only be one in the morning for you and you're like right well that's either late or early either one i don't like it you would not have even gone to bed yet if you're in LA right. Well, that's either late or early.
Either one, I don't like it. You would not have even gone to bed yet

if you were in LA.

Yeah.

Sometimes I go in and they go,

now we've got it dialed in where you call ahead

and then you can do a phoner.

Yeah.

And sometimes it's-

Yeah, they go-

They go, this is tape.

This is for Friday.

So act like it's yesterday was Thursday.

Yeah.

And when I say Friday,

I mean Friday, two weeks from now. Act like the election's over and you already know who won.
But yeah, I don't particularly like going in anymore. I'm more of the mindset.
Look, I don't care how many people are in that. I don't want to get up.
Oh, yeah. That's a big ask.

I mean, listen, my fans, they know where I am.

Come and find me.

Yeah, yeah.

Can you believe it's been, well, for me, I got on SNL about 38 years ago.

And it's been like 30 years, 29 since I left.

I mean, we could be the grandparents of some of those cast members that are on now and we might be oh i was just there for 10 weeks i was working with people in their mid-20s yeah and a couple of them we did the math we checked out certain biographies and i said i

could be your grandfather we never got confirmation but it was in the realm of possibility did you uh did they build a ramp for you to get a new church?

Like,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know,

you know, you know, you know,. I don't know about you guys, but that's been such a center stone for me that show and you constantly think about you know lorne michaels what he would do what he would say to you you know if uh you know you feel like oh this is hacky stuff i'm doing i hope it doesn't get back to anybody and it was so long ago it's like you know when we were when we were starting to do comedy it's like your show of shows what had been a shorter uh distance of time between when we first started and what we're doing now and i'm speaking for you space for me it wasn't no i'm it's closer did you know that it's closer now from snl till right now till snl backwards to when they invented at the telephone.
I was trying to put something together in my head. Adam and Eve is closer to when we got hired.
Yeah. Yeah.
We're Adam and Eve white. Question.
Got really tense. Depends who's reading what from what source.

They could be any color you want.

It depends on where that garden is.

It was in Beverly Hills.

Yeah.

Was it a red apple or a green apple?

Yeah.

A lot of controversy.

I think it's a story.

It doesn't sound like paradise if there's a reptile on a tree taunting you. There's snakes everywhere when you're having lunch.
And what if you're allergic to that fig leaf? Oh, yeah. How do you explain that? The thing they don't explain is that the sex between Adam and Eve got really hot once they knew they were naked.
And they were kind of and sort of illicit, you know, changed the whole dynamic. Illicit, don't you think? Well, do you think that they really had that, I forget the word, but, you know, concern that maybe their genitals might be showing? And the only person that's going to see it is the other person you want to have sex with.
There no one else around except for the snake no one had had sex at that point right they were they were created so yeah i don't know this is really uh the snake was like this is no competition for me i'm not i'm not steeped in this guys oh don't don't keep doing steep now i like the word you called it out you got it i just got one guys a question because i have a really wicked cold but I have a gig tomorrow and I like the word. You called it out.
You got it. I just got one.

I want you guys a question

because I have a really wicked cold,

but I have a gig tomorrow

and I'm going to fly

and I can't clear my ears.

And one time I did this

and I have cartilage damage

in one of the ears.

It's very painful.

Let me just turn your head.

Let me look in your ear

and see if it's clear.

Let me see.

You know,

do you do the thing

where you blow your nose and hold your nose?

I don't do that. I'm scared of that.

Well, have you guys ever

canceled a gig because you didn't feel well?

Or have you just always

fucked it up?

Well, I will tell you, I was just in Kansas City

and I got a stomach bug

on the last day of my last gig there.

I was in bed all day. I was over the

toilet, on the toilet, and I just forced myself to go to do the gig there i was in bed all day i was over the toilet on the toilet and i just forced myself to go you know to do the gig it was horrible i got so many nights good question i could go forever one time i i was with bill maher and tommy davidson we had a gig up in uh buffalo new york an outdoor like theater and i don't know if i was supposed to go middle but i had i had a food boy in the back I couldn't get up. I had to lay down on a cot that brought a cot over.
And I said, I don't know if I could do this, but I didn't want to fly all the way up there and not do the gig. So I asked the stage man, I said, would you put the cot out on the stage for me? And I'll just do my act from the cot.
I told the audience, I said, you know, I'm really depressed. I got to lie down.
And I did it from the cot on my side. And they were like crazy and i got through it and i thought that works so well i'm gonna start bringing that cot with me to other gigs it worked like it didn't work at all i brought it twice and it's just even when you feel good yeah i sometimes feel like fraser in the 15th round getting up off the stool if you're really really sick well there's got problems with dana's situation when do you cancel because it's scary to cancel by the way if i was not doing working tomorrow i would cover for dan um and and the other thing is if they wanted me but the other thing is you don't want to make it worse like if i fly i'm making it worse if i go uh you know you don't want to you don't want to hurt your ears or you're like i'm not supposed to fly with sinus stuff because it might pop who cares if i get everyone sick but no one cares on my flights if they get me sick everyone's coughing and sneezing i'm like does anyone give a fat fuck anymore about like just do i wear a mask on the plane because uh this is an all coach southwest plane yeah maybe that three i'll be packed in with a lot of people and i don't know if i'll be confident but look if i have this voice i'll be like well isn't that special people get scared yeah here's what i noticed that um when i have a cold and i don't want to do something with people, it's, you know, I'm not interested in it.
I'll tell them I have a cold and I don't want to affect them. But if it's something I really want to do and I'm obvious like Dana's got a cold, I will say I got an allergy.
I got an allergy. Don't worry about me.
I got a by the time they figure it out, you're out of there. You've never canceled you've had some wicked nights but you've never canceled a gig i've only canceled because of like uh you know a tv gig or a movie yeah yeah but for illness you never can or i had a good massage lined up that's yeah yeah no i never uh i don't think i've ever canceled for illness you know i did uh san did San Francisco last year, Danny, your hometown, or your outskirts town.
And I was getting sick. And my doctor said, this is a sickening word that makes you sound old, polyps in your nose.
Which polyps, let me explain to you what they are. I don't know what they are, but really, he said they're 100% blocking you and you're going to keep, you can't not be sick anymore because you've waited 10 years to get an operation.
So I'm at a gig and I'm sick and I didn't mind really being sick and just finishing the tour, but you couldn't really hear me. So I've never had that laryngitis, which is so weird, but I don't want to cancel a gig and it's the day of the show and people are coming.
So they bring in a doctor like Pink Floyd, you know, to jack you up. You know, sometimes they can do that.
They give you steroids. I don't know what it is, but you're right after you're like JonBenet.
You're like, somehow it clears you up. It didn't work.
And I still don't want to cancel. So I got there and I'm like, hello.
And everyone's like, oh, like right away. They're like like oh no and i'm like he's doing a bit

i didn't want to cancel so i'll give you four percent and they're like jesus christ so i

literally was like everybody be really quiet it's hard to hear me so nobody laugh until the end

and just uh i'll just say my jokes flatly and then at the end it'll count and they're like great

well how did you know that

you had, when you have polyps in your

nose, I never knew that, I mean do you get a

colonoscopy through your nose? Is that how they find out?

My nose is,

my nasal cavities

are connected to my butthole somehow, like it

goes all the way down.

So they go up through the butt?

They go either way, yeah.

Oh nice, nice. You might want to go through your

nose first.

And then I go, yeah I go, aren't polyps in my b-hole? And I go, well, they're just, I don't even know what they are. I picture like mushrooms growing there.
They go, it's blocking. And so I went and I did the gig, but I was glad I did it because it still went pretty good because it started to come back a little.
And then, you know, I get that is terrifying and really harder than they said but then i didn't get sick for a year and a half nothing man look at us talking about a fib no we can't talk about this we cannot we cannot no i i had gigs in the 80s because i do eight shows a week 90 minutes a set And I would get like a lot of antibiotics, a of you know plus i i i bit on my tongue once and was bleeding profusely welcome to the stage you know i mean you just you do get funny things you go well yeah yeah what about this we do this a lot i mean spade and i I have talked about getting injured in hotel rooms, like slamming, getting up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and slamming your shit into a table. Right.
You've had those kept. I had a hematoma that I couldn't put weight on.
It was so painful. Wow, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was in Spokane, Washington doing doing a gig. And I, I heard that Chevy Chase was doing his Christmas vacation kind of a tour, you know, question and answer stuff.
He was staying at my hotel. And so I texted him, see if he wanted to go have a cup of coffee because we're at the same hotel.
He goes, well, I can't. I fell last night, hit my head on a knife stand.
well that would happen to anyone when I was a lot younger

though too because it's just another hotel and it's very easy if the lights are down. Yeah, I mean, I never thought that Shavy Tays would get hurt falling.
He was like a big faller for a while. Yeah, I mean, that's how he got hurt, actually.
And you wrote back, LOL, LOL, LOL, LOL. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But you know,

I've never gotten hurt in a hotel room like that. I slammed my finger in the door.

As a small biz owner, you don't have the luxury of clocking out early. This is very true.
Your

business is on your mind 24 seven. So when you're hiring, you need a partner that grinds it out just

as hard as you do. That hiring partner is LinkedIn jobs.
When you clock out LinkedIn clocks in. LinkedIn makes it easy to post your job for free, share it with your network and get qualified candidates that you can manage all in one place.
Yeah. I think when you're trying to hire someone, there's a lot of different things you're looking for, but you want them to kind of have your aesthetic your sensibility if you were you could look up those words david sure um and that's hard to have a chemistry uh and match so linkedin is is going to try to shorten that for that process for you and make sure everyone's heard of linkedin i mean that's why because it's been around forever people really like it.
New feature can help you write job descriptions and then quickly get your job right in front of the right people with deep candidate insights. Either post your job for free, you can pay to bump it up and promote it.
Promoted jobs get three times more qualified applicants. At the end of the day, the most important thing to your small business is the quality, quality of candidates.
With LinkedIn, you can feel confident that you're getting the best, David. Based on LinkedIn data, 72% of SMBs using LinkedIn say that LinkedIn helps them find the high quality candidates.
Share it with your network. Let your network know you're hiring.
You can even add a hashtag hiring frame to your profile. Get two times more qualified candidates.
You didn't know that trick. Post your job for free at linkedin.com slash candidates.
That's linkedin.com slash candidates to post your job for free. Terms and conditions do apply.
Some people follow the rules, but where's the fun in that? I'm Soraya and this is Rule Breakers, the podcast where we celebrate the rebels, the misfits, and the ones who make their own way. Every week, I sit down with the biggest rule breakers in sports, entertainment, and beyond to talk about the wildest moments, toughest lessons, and why breaking the rules might just be the key to success.
Follow and listen to Rule Breakers with Soraya, an Odyssey podcast available now for free on the Odyssey app and wherever you get your podcasts. Dana, it's award season, which means we're due for some classic red carpet combos, like strapless dresses and statement necklaces, or acclaimed directors and long acceptance speeches.
But you know what look always pairs perfectly together? Discover and cash back. You see, Discover automatically matches all the cash back you've earned at the end of the first year.
Which is a look that will always serve. It pays to slay.
It pays to Discover. See terms at discover.com slash credit card.
I have a question for you, Kevin. This is not part of this.
Yeah, it's outside the podcast. Oh, yeah.
A couple of questions. One is...
I don't trust you. I want to hear a little bit about the Swatch Tour because I was so jealous of it when I was on S&L.
Really? I don't know if I was on it yet, but i thought these guys are going on the road i mean i don't think i was on s and l yet but i knew about you guys got a tour because you were doing well in the show and like three hilarious guys you two and dennis and then you played arizona i think at the celebrity theater i don't know why i remember all this i just remember a swatch i think i remember what you were getting or I heard a rumor and I was like, oh my God. And what a fun thing.
Even I don't realize then the road is hard, but three funny guys, Swatch tour. And that was in the summer, was it Kevin? In between seasons? After our first season, it happened fast.
Kevin and I only did one season, right? Yeah. I mean, actually, that tour is still going on right now.
Dana and Dennis dropped off. I'm canceling tomorrow.
It's just you? It's just me now. I've been going since then.
That's so funny. I still call it the Swatch Tour.
That's the first time I think something was sponsored in my head, like a comedy tour. I thought that was a big deal.
So you got more money because you did you have to wear a swatch no but we got swatches i think we got swatches yeah that was really exciting it was exciting because they played they played clips from snl before we came out and the music you know g.e smith band and snl band and it was just really a high rev and people would go crazy and that that was, you know, before anybody was kind of doing big. Yeah.
A theater was like, not really what I'd heard of. Maybe Leno, maybe.
Yeah. And what was the order? Do you remember? Do you guys just flip flop? Yeah.
Yeah. I would go on first and then I would never get off.
So it was just me, basically. And you would do...

They wouldn't let me get off.

I would just get, you know, encores.

No, yeah, it was me.

I think Dennis and Dana, maybe they switched it up a little bit.

I think we switched off a little bit.

It was me because I was a feature player on SNL at the time.

Oh, yeah.

Never liked following either of you, actually.

I wouldn't follow any of you guys. I don't want to follow Dennis or Kevin.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Never liked following either of you.
I wouldn't follow any of you guys.

I don't want to follow Dennis or Kevin.

Yeah.

You want a nice,

very nice,

clean opener.

Not too funny.

Yeah.

Don't make them too good.

You know,

maybe Kevin,

when you get on,

did you tag team it?

You should have brought up Dana and then you should have done your Hans

and Franz there.

We,

we might have,

I don't even think we had come up with Hans and Franz.

We didn't.

We came up with Hans and Franz basically on that tour.

Yeah.

That's what I'm saying. and then you should have done your Hans and Franz there.
We might have. I don't even think we had come up with Hans and Franz.
We came up with Hans and Franz basically on that tour. Yeah, that's right.
We had not done it on SNL. Yeah.
Yeah, we were in, I think, Des Moines, Iowa, and I was watching Arnold Schwarzenegger on some up-close-and-personal interview, and they were asking him what he does when he gets into town. I can't do good, Arnold, but he goes, you know, when I get into town, I get into the nice light cottage shirt, and then I go into town, and I come back to the hotel, and I slip into the nice light cottage sheets.
And so Dane and I started doing that the whole trip. And then somehow I just evolved into Hans and Franz, maybe two pathetic defensive losers who never left their way in their life.
They're still my favorite. I have to say of what I laugh at the hardest for myself that I was in, because they're clearly have a lot of mental health issues.
They're extremely paranoid, probably schizophrenic. They're on this rinky dink show and they're threatening.
No one is saying anything to them. They're threatening imaginary enemies and they will come to their house and do all these exotic torture things to them.
And no one cares about them at all. And they just probably, there's probably only like a dozen 15 year olds watching it.
They think it's like thousands of people. And then you look so fucking doofy with your hair.
Did you have a separated teeth or anything? Yeah. we would paint paint them oh yeah but the night kevin and i were on the phone just hatching it out and uh and we were just riffing around with it somehow and then kevin said and if you don't believe and if you don't think you know and that just made me less so then we did that for an hour and we knew that was really cold.
Just in there paranoid. If you don't think properly pumped up, think again.
Because you ought to lose a, you know what I mean? So that. Yeah, yeah.
And I remember when Arnold came on to be in one of the Hans and Franz sketches, we were a little nervous because we were making fun of him. And we went to his dress room and his name was on the door.
His name was so long, it went onto the wall a little bit. We knocked on his door

and the door opens up and it's full of

cigar smoke.

We could barely see him sitting across the room. He's got a big

cigar in his hand. He's got the script he wrote.

He looks through the cigar smoke to us. He goes,

Hello, fellas. Now am I supposed to do the accent?

You know, Arnold

stylistically, Arnold reminds me of Trump and trump reminds me of arnold in that arnold just is so smart but he makes things very simple you know if they if they do your voice all it does is spread you out there and he we talked to him recently and he said that us doing that really helped kind of solidify the voice of Arnold. And so we were fearful he might beat us up, not literally, but be mad or something or disappointed.
But he was totally—and it is a smart way to go if someone does an impression of you. And I think he got a great kick out of it.
You think they're both smart, but don't know how— Street smart. Street smart.
who hans and franz no well arnold the reason it was so funny about arnold he's like and it's all he's always got it together you do your work out yeah it's like this fantastical life yeah very simply said and then trump's like it's gonna be beautiful it's gonna be great i mean it i don't know what it is yet but it's gonna be great when i figure out what it is so self-promotion and very good about that self-promotion oh we had arnold on the podcast and then dana did push-ups remember that was good that was like a little clip that went around uh i could do push-ups now if it will help us somehow. It's funny.

I did do,

they asked me to do Elon Musk on Saturday Night Live and I did 30 seconds of it and they did pretty good prosthetics.

And I was him kind of at a mega,

I'm don't may God,

I'm jumping around.

And then all Elon tweeted was,

or X Dana Carvey sounds just like Dana Carvey.

I thought it was kind of funny. You know, that was a slamana carvey who i thought was kind of funny you know that was a slam that was trying he's trying to slam you oh that was a slam uh yeah like it wasn't any good i do think if you do an impression to someone it can be a little disjointed for them because is that how people see me you know yeah yeah well anyone getting an impression tom petty i did i made him look like he was deformed in the face just like stretching my face right but you know and then i always think when you meet him they're gonna be so excited like oh aren't you the guy that makes me look like a fool is aren't you the guy where i you benefit and i don't at all because i'm the guy you're making fun of and i'm like like, yeah, isn't that great? I wouldn't.
I did. Oh, go ahead.
I was just going to mention, because I hadn't seen anyone else do that. You did Brent Musburger.
It was a famous sportscaster. He may have just retired or something, but.
And you just pulled your eyes down or something. Yeah, I pulled my eyelids.
I pulled the sides of my eyelids down. That was an Al Franken idea right there.
And just kept him there as you're talking. You held him? Oh, during the bit, you held him? Instead of prosthetics, he did it manually and just held him.
But talking about people getting mad at you for doing them, I used to think they're all getting mad at us for doing it. But people actually, these actors will love gives them the attention mostly and i remember i did uh but not always i i did michael bolton once where i was singing trying to sing like him my voice was all raspy and i had i got bronchitis after that for like a month from doing that voice so i go i'm in hawaii like you know maybe eight months later 10 months later and i get into the uh the jacuzzi and and how in hawaii and michael bolton's and uh on the other side it's just me and michael bolton and his wife at the time my wife at the time and he did not say a word to us and then i'm walking back to the hotel room and uh he said anything he didn't say one thing and uh maybe and i said i wonder why uh he was so kind of standoffish and she goes well you did make fun of him and i said like oh that's right oh but he ended up doing a lot of funny stuff oh yeah no he's great he's great yeah i mean he's really making himself i was probably misreading it at the time but he was was because, you know, I had such an ego.
What about when he tried to drown you? Great voice. Well, he did let me up at the last minute.
Was he in the Feed the Chickens fundraiser sketch? I don't know. That was where David did.
I did. I did Dylan and you did Petty.
Oh, is that that we are the world yeah yeah it was we are the world i was either dave perner kirk cobain or tom petty those are three i did in those type of sketches where we're like doing a fundraiser where everyone great idea just everyone plays a celebrity i think it was bonnie and terry turner you must have played some celebrity and farley was wilson phillips he was wilson and phillips you know the funny thing about farley doing that is that the other two were actually just extras which is very rare on our show we had someone just play should it could have been christine zander or something but you throw writers in there sometimes, but it was just purely extras that

looked like the other two.

Let me ask you a quote.

I was just going to mention, oh, go ahead.

I was just going to say this,

but all right, can I get a word

in for a minute?

I would see these posters of you and

Farley, and you look like you're 12 at the time.

And I

always think to myself,

I wonder,

and the same with John Candy.

I think,

I wonder what kind of work would be done by those actors now.

If they were still alive,

you know,

and,

and if you were alive as well.

And I always wonder what that would.

In Farley,

you know,

Farley in Tommy boy,

I still have his jacket.

It's like kind of plaid jacket. He worn on the poster or in the movie.
And it's not that big. He wasn't that huge then.
Only because I was such a twig, it kind of made him look bigger. But he probably at the end weighed 80 more pounds.
That jacket fits you at the time. That jacket fits me now.
But yeah, I think Brendan Fraser, was it Dana? He came over and he put it on and it fit him perfectly. And Brendan Fraser isn't big.
He wasn't in his whale costume. He was just regular.
Was that a whale costume? Was that prosthetics? Remember when he played whale? Did he gain weight for that? I don't know. Yeah, that was a massive massive prosthetic he told us for a full hour i don't remember i'm like that was an intense movie but i do think that chris chris's golden age you know tommy boy and that year he had on snl you obviously uh was he guest hosting when he did the man down by the river or was that it was even part of the cast no he was in the cast i think he did it he did it again when he okay when it hosting when he did the Man Down by the River? Or was he in part of the cast? No, he was in the cast.
I think he did it again when he... Okay, later.
He hosted right toward the end, and he was really sweaty. Bob Odenkirk wrote that, correct? Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, he would get really sweaty. I remember the last time I saw him, I was up in the brilstein office and he was in a conference room just sitting at a long table and i think he had like his hair dyed pink it was a mohawk or something and leather jacket and just sweating real fidgety yeah let me guys ask you a question as seinfeld go it went crazy when i always say this let me i gotta ask a question.
Because there's all these things they're doing with SNL because the 50th documentaries, this and that. They put me in some room and they had on one board tons of sketches on cards, all-time great sketches.
And then they had a classic board and they go, okay, we want you to pick what would be the first sketch you're trying to do an all-star show right after the monologue they already had a cold opening i couldn't remember what it was oh host monologue so the first sketch up and that and i saw van down by the river but then i'm thinking you can't have that first up because you can't follow it you know so, so you want something really up, but that people could follow. And, you know, it was all great.
I actually, not because I was in it, but I thought it was not hysterical, but incredibly entertaining. And that was Wayne's World with Tom Hanks as the roadie and also Aerosmith.
And we play with them. Like it'd be a big energy boost, but it wasn't, it wasn't like cowbell or, or van down by the river sketches that, you know, tough, tough to keep going in a way that take a little time, maybe put update in between them.
No. I like the concept that you're picking the best sketches.

It's very hard to look at the board.

Trying to create the greatest show of all time.

Yeah, it's an interesting one.

One of the sketches that I loved was, and I have loved a lot of them,

but it makes me laugh every time.

It's making me laugh now.

I think it was called the Belize-Move sketch when I was with

Kirstie Alley going to the Italian restaurant.

And all the Italian, you know, Schneider and Sandler. Il Cantore, maybe.
Yeah, maybe that's it, yeah. Il Cantore.
And they were all doing this Italian, overly affectionate, you know, kissing and licking her face. No, that's what they do, honey.
They're Italian. That should be in there.
That looks kind of weird. Yeah.
Two things on that for me, and I totally agree. Because it killed like it was a home-based sketch and it was a restaurant sketch it just crushed and kirstie alley i was supposed to lick her face you did she somebody looked it no no and she was totally cool do whatever you want look at anything i don't care about anything you know she was very very cool i just want to put that in there and then the moment where my character goes over as Schneider and, and Sandler are coming in,

hardly dressed.

Yeah.

And then I,

I put Victoria stood up,

put her down on the table and then kept talking.

Now that was probably the build of that whole sketch.

That moment where I was just the passenger in the joke,

nothing I was doing legs over my thing.

Hey,

come on.

I'll see you next time. Now, that was probably the build of that whole sketch.
That moment where I was just the passenger in the joke,

nothing I was doing, legs over my thing,

was one of the biggest.

And it's in the background, too.

So it's not like right up front.

It's in the background. It's not forced.

It's kind of casual.

Was Sam wearing a jockstrap when he was a waiter?

But that was the funny thing is when we're walking away they all

come up to the window and sam has got a speedo on it's that is there and they're all looking like they're puppies in a you know all right right yeah we're just dressing our faces again okay it's called il cantore it's on youtube il cantore the other one the other one that comes of mind is uh headound Harry that Jack Andy wrote. When Dana's wick, they had put some red syrup on there so the dog would lick it.
And the dog is pulling his wick. Dana's trying to hold on to it.
I was, again, I was just a passenger in that. And they did put more Did Schneider tell us they put more it was like baby food or something but they kind of held back on the dress show and then they put a ton on the prosthesis the fake you know rubber bloody head i suppose they had and then i knew i had the sketch was going so strong that i made that i just did not want the wig to come off and have it be, so I just held it at the temple and that just made the tug of war go on for a minute or something.
And so you can't beat a dog who doesn't know what's in a sketch. It just really is hungry.
It would have been hilarious if he actually took the wig and ran away. Yeah, that would have been awesome.
Just the title alone. Well, I could have gone to that.
Just the title alone, Head Wound Harry. Massive head.
It makes me laugh so hard. With a little song.
And I was talking to Sarah Sherman and some of the younger cast members. And I said, I love a little presentational sketch where the song kind of tells you everything

you need to know.

And they said that's kind of out of fashion.

I didn't want to be a grumpy old man.

Okay.

But it was, it was always very relaxing when you'd see a little song and a thing, and then

you go in, the guy actually has a massive head wound.

I don't know.

I would do more of that personally, but maybe it's out of style.

Like Toontes.

Toontes had one. Toont is the cat or even hans and franz welcome to hans and franz or even um he's lyle the effeminate heterosexual there's a song wasn't it oh everything is conjectual he's lyle the effeminate heterosexual i had a hard time with that one because, and again, this is the early 90s.

It was very edgy.

I heard it was Tim Burton's favorite sketch.

But I met a hairdresser who I just thought was gay and he was straight.

And so there it went from there.

But I couldn't really do the voice because every time I did it, it sounded like church lady to me. So I had to come up with a different that's inside baseball.
Kevin, so you had a subliminal man. Yeah, on update several times.
Well, that was the first sketch I ever did was Mrs. Subliminal and the first show that we came out of the gig on and i was terrified because you know you see you're standing on the stage or belushi and when was that on in the show by the way it was i'm not sure i think it might have been the first half but i remember waiting to go on and i'm terrified and we're like 10 seconds out from commercial and lauren michaels comes up to me he puts his hand on my shoulder and he said, are you sure this is what you want? Action.
What psycho. He always has little quips and he doesn't realize they're just like bombshells to whoever is about to go on.
Everyone's scared i believe he believes and maybe it does in a way uh kind of relax i mean once you get used to it not on your very first show but lauren always does stuff like that it'd be a good thing if this show was actually like good you know and stuff like that yeah yeah yeah i love i would love to see a compilation of everybody's first sketch.

It's kind of ga the level of nervousness that they're having. Yeah, that's interesting.
But not good. No, it's not a great idea, but it's an interesting idea.
Yeah, yeah. What was yours? I can't even think of you had any line.
Oh, you know what mine was? Casualties of War when I did Michael J. Fox.

And it backfired. Oh, so you had a great-

Backfired because-

It backfired?

Because they forgot to put me as a feature player in the opening credits.

So people thought it was Dana or Mike because I had a wig on.

And they didn't know it didn't sound like my voice.

So they were just like, who's that guy?

You know?

Elon Musk thought it was you.

Huh? Elon Musk thought it was you. elon musk thought it was you yeah he said i saw that bit it sounded like david spade exactly david spade yeah oh and i was like oh so yeah kevin and i i mean to have a sketch say it was before update and stuff was a big thing you know especially we had a small cast

and our very first show everyone got to do a lot of stuff right yeah it's only like eight of us right i think it yeah total you guys had four cast members right uh when we first started i think it was five maybe or it was one or six yeah i was a feature player and then the next year Lawrence said I could be either a cast member

or if I want to

say a writer

or I could be either a cast member or if I want to stay a writer or remain a writer.

And I mean, you know, but if I became a cast member, I wouldn't have that writing title.

Oh, that's right.

They take writing away.

But we all still wrote.

I took the cast.

I took seeing on the cast.

So you were in the cast.

Yeah.

They're doing a documentary.

One of the SNL,

there's five of them on Peacock.

And I guess one of them is just writers,

which is great.

But I asked the person who saw it,

I said,

is there any cast members in there who just were writing,

but didn't get credit?

Cause no,

no,

no,

no.

It is,

it's,

you get used to it,

but it is just sort of funny.

People say, who wrote that thing? I'm like, well, I wrote

90% of it.

It's crazy that

you don't get that. I hosted

one of those. It was called The Weird

Year, and that was in 1985,

I think. That cast, 85, 86?

Yeah, that transitional

strange year. Yeah, Anthony Michael Hall,

Robert Downey Jr., all talented actors, but I don't think the synergy was there between the writers and them. Synergy.
They don't let it steepen up. Yeah.
Well, there's Groundlings and Second City and stuff, and then there's just stand-up. And actors.
Stand-up and then actors but stand-ups you know we're trained to get a laugh and so we automatically are trained to be have some brevity to the setup and things like that where are the laugh points but uh i i would have loved to have gone to something like groundlings didn't have it when i was starting out in san francisco that is my regret but you know who would, who would have thought? All I wanted to ever do was stand-up comedy. I wasn't even thinking about acting or improv.
I just wanted to be a stand-up. But, yeah, in hindsight, I would have much rather been in the groundlings had I known, I guess, NL was going to come after me.
David, I don't know if you know this about me, but I've always been a fan of exploring new places. Not like you kind of, you know, no offense.
And one of my best trips, listen up, is when I stayed at an Airbnb. Felt like I was living like a local with all the space, comfort of home.
You know, hotels can be a hassle. Room service and then the housekeeper housekeeping it's a hassle so then

you go to airbnb and you can get whatever you want a little cottage this and that it's fantastic you have your own separate space so it's a great product for people who travel david yes i have friends doing one of these right now if you have a home you can airbnb it That's fantastic.

I mean, to monetize your home when you're not there seems like a good idea i mean look i'm on the road a lot i could probably do it it's it's something that people can do when they travel they have extra space or you're at a place not full-time you come in the winter you leave in the summer. That's something you should think about.
It's a way to get some extra money. And it's a cool experience.
Your home might be worth more than you'd think. Yep.
Find out how much at airbnb.com slash host. Omaha.
Omaha, Dana. That's what Peyton Manning used to yell out.
Oh, yeah. Omaha Steaks.
Did he yell Steaks, too? I don't know. Maybe.
I don't know. Omaha steaks.
You know, David, you may not know this, delivers the world's best steak experience, brings people together, more than a hundred years of family expertise as, get this, America's original butcher. Yeah.
Listen, everyone's heard of Omaha steaks. They got their legendary filet mignons, their extra age to maximize tenderness.
I like a good tender filet. Sometimes I get these and they're just rough, but these guys take pride in this.
I'm going to go out on a limb and just say when you get a steak, you want a high quality steak. Now you could get an inexpensive bologna sandwich or something, but with a steak, you want it to be high quality.
And now during their semi-annual sale, do you know what that means? And you get- Yeah, you get 50% off site-wide at omahasteaks.com. Plus our listeners get an extra on top of that, $30 off with promo code FLY at the checkout.
I like that. This sale only happens twice a year.
So don't miss out on your chance to save on handcrafted steaks, beefy burgers. I'm getting hungry.
Premium chicken and so much more. Oh yeah.
They can almost say biannual. Doesn't that mean twice? Am I crazy? Yeah.
Biannual. So there's lots of ways We'll get into that next time we talk about it.
Listen, this is heartland quality food delivered right to your door. That's the convenience.
It's winter. You might want to throw some on the grill, on the Barbie.
So listen, exceptional handcrafted flavor, convenience, all the things you want to hear. Unrivaled quality, variety.
Everybody's backed

by their 100% guarantee. And every steak is perfectly aged to maximize tenderness.
That's

what I'm looking for. Hand cut by Master Butchers.
Yeah. Omaha Steaks, America's original butcher

since 1917. These people know what they're doing.
Yeah. Don't miss the semi-annual sale at Omaha

Steaks. Visit omahasteaks.com for a 50% off site-wide and an extra $30 off.
Use promo code

Thank you. These people know what they're doing.
Yeah. Don't miss the semi-annual sale at Omaha Steaks.
Visit omahasteaks.com for a 50% off site-wide and an extra $30 off. Use promo code fly at checkout.
That's 50% off at omahasteaks.com and an extra $30 off with promo code fly at checkout. Someone I know just got engaged in and it's a big one.
It's a big one. It's the next step in a relationship and that's why they have a thing called an engagement ring.
What was the Beyonce song? You should have put a ring on it. Oh yeah.
Pay attention to that. And we know how you can get a nice ring, right? You go to Blue Nile.
Blue Nile, your engagement ring shopping spot. You got the shape, they got the size, setting, cut, color.
It's all very confusing, but you need someone to help walk you through it. That's the place to go.
It is confusing, but they make it simple is what I'm going to say. Yeah.
You go there and they clear it up because I don't know what I'm doing. Like most guys don't understand.
So that's why going to blue and isle.com starts your engagement ring journey. They'll create a bigger, more brilliant engagement ring than you can imagine at a price you'll never find at a traditional jeweler.
Since 1999, BlueNile has been the original online jeweler, and they've always been committed to ensuring the highest ethical standards. That's right.
Their diamond price guarantee means that in most cases, they'll meet, wait for it, or beat a competitor's price on a comparable diamond. David? Your gift will stay safe because, you know, most people don't want that coming to their house where it gives it away.
So the Blue Nile order is insured and arrives in packaging that won't give that away. In most cases, it's delivered overnight.
Listen, because love can last forever, you get free service and repair for life. This is great.
Right now, get $50 off your purchase of $500 or more with code FLY at BlueNile.com. That's $50 off with code FLY at BlueNile.com.
BlueNile.com. I have a question before we dump Kevin but um Kevin when you what was the movie you did with Sandler you've probably done a handful with him right? Yeah I've done like 13 shit the one where you had plastic surgery oh that was called Just Go With It yeah they look like they it looked pretty What did they do? Well, that was four hours in a makeup chair every morning.
Oh, it was? It had to be because it looked good. Four days, and they only used me one of those.
Oh, really? Yeah, one. But it was a really funny character because I had so much plastic surgery, and Sandler was a plastic surgeon, and I would see him at a a party and I'd come up to him because I was addicted to plastic surgery and I'd go, you know, whatever his name was, one more, one more cap.
Just give me one more cap, you know, implant, cap implant, you know, I'll take one, you know, and then I'd laugh and the water would drool out of the corner of my mouth because I couldn't move my face, you know. That's so funny.
But I did a lot of those films with him. And I remember I was, I got the script for Grandma's Boy.
And I read it and I thought, I don't know, man. I don't think I want to do this one.
It's like really crass. And, you know, Sandler wasn't even in it, but he was producing it.
And so I decided not to do it. And the next day, Sandler called me and goes, Neil, and I really hope you do this show, this movie, because, you know, if you don't do it, it's a big hit.
I'll feel bad. It's not a big hit.
No one will see it anyway. You did that, right? That was Nick Swartzen, right? Yeah.
It was Jennifer Aniston in the Plastic Surgeon film with Sandler. That was a big hit, I believe, that movie.
Yeah. Yeah.
Just go with it. It was huge.
Grandma's boy, I was in, and I probably did Kevin's part that he passed on. I was a waiter.
Well, no, I didn't pass on. I ultimately played Mr.
Teasel, who was the boss. Yeah.
I did, too, and I jinxed at him. I mean, I think the films were perfectly good, but they didn't outperform.

The first one was Little Nicky.

All right.

And I played the ref with a high-pitched voice.

And then Jack and Jill, where Regis and I were kind of hanging out,

because Regis Philman was in that one too.

It was just like small parts.

But Jack and Jill, I guess, I think it has a resurgence now. Because, you know, it had a lot of funny stuff in it.
Happy Gilmore is coming out. Oh, yeah.
Did you do Happy Gilmore? Yeah. Yeah.
I just finished doing that. Oh, you did? Amazing.
Yeah. That's going to be crazy.
Yeah. Yeah.
That was fun. I think that movie is just sort of iconic.
At some point, it became iconic.

So people really want to see it. The budget was the GNP of Guatemala.
It really was. I've never seen.
It was almost like an invasion going into the, you know. I mean, there's like 100 trailers and golf carts everywhere.
And, you know, prime rib and wild salmon. How many cameos are in it or how many character actors are in it? I keep hearing people are in Happy Gilmore.
There's a lot of athletes and cameos. It's a Guinness Book World Record of cameos.
Love it. You, Marcelo, Hermesino.
Yeah, I mean, it's just a lot of people. A lot of people.
It's going to be a lot. It's going to be a huge smash.
We're going to do things. We're going to take over.
It was a very interesting thing when he goes in Panama. We're taking back Panama.
It does get a little like he even outdoes Trump. We're taking it back.
We're taking it back. What is Panama supposed to do Panama goes what the fuck's going on I mean the guy is just what a character we'll see where it goes alright Kevin I think we should let Kevin go because he's been a really good sport today Kevin Nealon yeah as a friend of the podcast came in well yeah you had a you had a fallout so I you called me and i was in the next studio over i said sure i'll come over you know and uh filled in for that person and um you don't really see that on podcasts that much hey can you come on over we just said somebody drop out yeah you know like they used to do on all those talk shows oh yeah they call me on a lot of these talk shows and go you're our favorite guest can you be here in 12 minutes i'm like oh this isn't a fallout is it like no no no one time richard gear fell out and they called uh they were calling around and schneider did it and then he goes i'm just gonna do it as richard gear so he did the interview and just answered whatever he thought Richard Gere would say.

That's funny.

Yeah, it bombed.

Anyway, no, it did good.

It was funny.

I remember we had SNL.

You know, our studios was above Letterman.

Oh, yeah.

Whenever somebody bailed out on Letterman, they would call me to come down.

And it got to the point where I really had nothing to say, nothing prepared.

So I thought, I can't really do this anymore. I thought I'd be turning down like a spot on Letterman Conan too, when Conan took over you guys might have been gone by then but Kevin you're on the road so go see Kevin on the road yeah kevineal.com, my tour schedule don't forget the show.
You both did it. It's fucking funny.
So you can go watch on YouTube. Is that where it is on YouTube? It's on YouTube, and I have that book out.
You both, you know, I exaggerate. My Brushes with Fame, I exaggerate.
I exaggerate. Two great titles.
I exaggerate, and then under that, Brushes with Fame. My Brushes, yeah.
Is that a memoir, as they say, or autobiography? It's not really, but it kind of turned out to be one because I talk about, you know, Johnny Carson doing that and how we met, you and I, and you and me. And yeah, so it kind of became kind of a memoir.
But it's like these 60 paintings I've done, caricatures on the opposite page a little anecdote about that person oh yeah that's tricky that's good uh if you would you be scared to do a caricature of me because there's nothing to exaggerate because i have perfect features you're in the next book by the way okay yeah yeah hold me a spot because a lot of things about me they're really interesting also you look a lot like richard gear though in it so what it's gonna if it better not be richard gear it better be me i need my own page yeah and well i think dick dick gear is a great oh boy i i really like i really like dick gear i know. I like his – they always have weird names.
His son's name is Fourth, and I knew Fourth Gear when I used to be – anyway. How about the daughter? Daughter is winter, right? Is that true? Winter Gear? Winter Gear.
It's not even a saying. Now, Kevinvin so if we go on youtube hiking start with my episode because we walk on flat ground and then also you can watch old episodes and new ones right that's good that's the good part yeah it's all on youtube there's like five seasons of them i've done over 140 hikes you used to bill bird i see that yeah i did.
It was like two days before the fire wiped out Will Rogers Bay Park. What's all this brush? Why do you have brush? Yeah.
Come on, Dana. Go ahead.
That was fun. You know what drives me nuts? There we go.
Cyclone fences. What the fuck? Get a regular fence.
Drives me out of my fucking mind. Who eats pickles? It's a fucking cucumber.
Go fuck yourself. You got to close.
Before you send me off, Dana, you got to do your. I don't know if you do your call, but.
I'll try. This one makes me laugh more than anything.
Dana. Yeah.
love him. Doing pretty good.
Going to go down to get a little lobster down at the pier this afternoon. Our friend Dennis is in a very relaxed time in his life.
Let's put it that way. And it's really fun to talk to him because he's just very chill.
Yeah, Okay. Sammy came on.
He still calls you Sammy or refers to you as Sammy because we did the two Sammies in 1986. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
No, he's, uh, he seems very relaxed and chill in his spot, in his place right now. Good for him.
And where are we at? He's not desperate and thirsty like me out there running around doing gigs all over this fucking town and this country all of the country oh man well kevin you take it do you take advantage of social media i mean do you feel like you should be out there like you know more illegal way i i do clips i don't really do clips of my act because

most of my stuff is a little longer than you know i could put longer clips but some bits i guess i still do some of the old ones i put up some are not as relevant but it is good to just have clips floating around someone catches something yeah you don't do audience work crowd work i don't and i don't know if i even love when i see these clips because everyone's doing them only because that's the clips you put out to come see them so they don't burn their real material but then they look like a crowd work act so some people go there expecting a crowd work act i mean it's now. Film five shows and take the best crowd work parts and just call it crowd work.
I mean, that beats writing an act. Yeah, that's what Matt Reif did.
Kevin, you're very good at that. Well, you know, what a lot of people don't know is I do the same crowd work on every show.
I do the same, you know, whoever the person is, I'll do the same lines each time. It looks like it's spontaneous, but no, no.
But, oh, so you don't want to record it because then you can't use it. No, I use the same three people in the audience.
I take them with me on the road. They're shills.
Oh, okay. And it looks like it's spontaneous.
You know what I do, Kevin? I go, uh. It's like a lot of work to travel with that.
It is. And the cot.
I bring the cot with me, too.

So it's a big production deal.

It's a big to-do.

I was talking with Brian Regan once.

He did one of my hikes.

And he says, everything in his act, it's the way it's supposed to be.

There's no spontaneity or anything.

If he spills a little water, that was planned.

For real?

Yeah.

And one of the funniest comics out there. know people do that like when they laugh in the middle of a joke and then I see him all week and they laugh at the same spot every night I go oh my god yeah I know but it is an act that's why they call it an act it's a magic trick you're like hey well you're pretending that you're remembering your material

oh uh yeah

it's trying to fool the audience I mean it's

um yeah

yeah I used to know

everybody when they took a you know a swallow

before their

line or you know it's

and you know here's the one thing I don't do

and this is just for me

I don't call a bit a joke.

Like if somebody laughs, they'll say, Oh, you know, that last joke, I, you know, because that's

like, it's like a magician saying that was a trick. So I thought that was real.
I thought

that really happened. No, it was a trick, you know? So I never call it a joke.
Uh, and so that

way people realize I'm not a comedian. Like, well, maybe he's not a comedian.
Maybe that's actually happened to him. This is just an hour of things that happened to him recently.
Yeah. Yeah.
No, it's a lot of, uh, well, when you say, you know, uh, actually let's say two weeks ago I was driving. Yeah.
You say something like that. Let's make it two weeks ago.
Yeah. I've done all the tricks.
I've done all that stuff. It's all good stuff.
all that stuff some of your early stuff was I remember seeing this one at the Comedy Mansion Club you know they say live every day like it's your last so every day I take out insurance or whatever I stay on the phone for three hours making funeral arrangements just take it literal every single day you have to do that because it's your. Isn't it funny? And I know this happens to you too.
Somebody will come up and they'll say, in fact, Spade did this to me once. He goes, hey, you got a really nice camera, right? It's one of those black ones.
Remember that, Spade? And then you don't remember. And I go, that's from your app.
That's what I'm saying. People remind you and you go, oh, I don't know that one but I I guess so I I saw Letterman a couple weeks ago and uh he was telling me about it how much he loved this joke that I used to do and he tells it to everybody and gives me credit I said which one was it he goes well you talk about how uh Abraham Lincoln used to walk to school every day in the snow but what they don don't tell you is, yeah, but he was late every day.

And he loved that joke so much.

And so a week later, I tried it in a club.

Because I don't remember it.

I tried it in a club.

Crickets.

Nothing.

Yeah, bomb.

I like when you say, I stayed in a hotel.

It was nestled in the hills.

It always sounds better than wedged.

It was wedged in the hills. I stayed.
They actually, they put me in a honeymoon suite. I stayed with a nice couple from Nebraska.
Yeah. Yeah, those are good.
Yeah, you know, a hotel can be nestled. It can't be wedged, though, on a hillside.
You know, underwear is wedged. Enderwear can't be nestled.
You know, you never pull your underwear out of your crack and go, oh, that was kind of nestled up there. Yeah, it really got nestled deep.
Okay, let's leave on that one, Dana. It was steeped.
It was steeped in my book. The word of the day was steeped.
Thank you, Kevin. We'll do this again in a week.
Thanks, Kevin. It was fun.
Thank you, man. Okay, bye, guys.
This has been a presentation of Odyssey.

Please follow, subscribe, leave a like, a review, all this stuff, smash that button,

whatever it is, wherever you get your podcasts.

Fly on the Wall is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade,

Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, and Heather Santoro.

The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman.