Guys: Episode 103 - Big Lebowski Guys with Gavin Matts

Hey, welcome to Guys, Man, a podcast about guys.

I'm Brian, and with me is the dude, Chris James.

Hey, dude.

That's your

man.

Yeah, no, this is, hey, this is kind of cool.

Very good movie.

Very good film, obviously.

So it's like...

It's a crap movie.

It's like, hey, it's, you understand, a lot of sort of reference points and a lot of very funny running gags.

So, you know, I think it's going to be exciting to see kind of a group of very cool guys.

Well, it's cool because we're going to be able to read some reviews of the movie off of Rotten Tomatoes for guys that maybe didn't like it to see what maybe people might not like.

But we got to get our guest on here, Gavin Matz.

Hi, Gavin.

Hi, everyone.

Hi, hi the dude and hi brian i i'm dude i'm the dude oh well

i thought you called me the dude but and i think i am the dude i mean i think you know excuse me excuse me that i'm the host who really ties this show together sorry let me just say i i let me just let me just introduce myself and i let me just say i i don't abide

oh oh he's seeing it that's also from the movie yeah oh yeah no it's listen i i don't know people should know i've mentioned it, I guess, on some episodes and stuff.

I think you've only really mentioned it on bonus stuff.

So I don't know.

I've mentioned it on a main episode before, but I, at some point in my life, I guess, well, I'm learning I wasn't really a big Lebowski guy.

I was something much more disgusting than that.

As I was, I was like, I thought I was

the dude.

Are you this guy that I found?

He wants a religion.

But But see, this is the whole thing.

Yes, and yes.

And I had one of those jackets, one of those wool things that I, exactly like the dude.

I definitely had that going on.

But it was like, I realized I didn't want to, because there's dude cons and all that stuff that we'll probably learn about and all these meetups or whatever.

But I didn't have any interest in going to that.

I just like wanted to live my life.

exactly like the dude and I started to sort of believe that I was him and I would only drink white russians and we would go bowling and i had a friend who sort of thought he was walter no way when i was i i want to say this i want to say this when i was 12 years old when i was 12 years old right i saw the movie boys in the hood

like my friend's parents took me and me and my brother and and i was like uh i was like god damn i need to get in a gang after i saw that movie So, is that what?

Because you did end up getting

a gang.

So, that seems like not actually the point or message of that movie in particular, Brian.

So, oh, yeah.

I think he's, I think, when a young person watches something like that, I think that is an issue with art sometimes

like that, Gavin, is that, yeah, you're trying to put forward this one message, but if you have like sort of an ignorant audience watching it, then you get the exact opposite message.

Brian was like, I might start a cult called Black Dudeism.

But

I think that Brian, obviously everybody knows Brian is in a violent, was in a violence game.

No, I wasn't in a violence game, number one.

It was a mafia.

Random people would assault random people.

So when did that happen in relation to you watching Boys in the Hood?

I mean, I got the idea in, I would say, when I was like, 14 to start a mafia.

So it was just a couple years later after watching it.

So it maybe had some impact on the fact that you were, it had some impact on your gang being formed.

I guess Morpheus's monologue, you didn't take to that, huh?

And

I think he fast-forwarded through the monologues and stuff, probably.

Yeah, I don't bring this up to talk about me wanting to start a gang.

I bring this up as in, like, some people watch movies.

and they might take the wrong lesson from it.

And I feel like that's what you did when you became the dude.

Oh,

I get that.

Because I actually, when I saw Agent Cody Banks, I actually thought maybe I was Agent Cody Banks.

I don't know that.

I know that's the one with Malcolm in the middle.

But I never checked that one out.

Was Amanda Bynes in that as well, though?

No, Lizzie Maguire.

Lizzie Maguire, my friend.

Kevin's like, the CIA is actually evil.

And I don't know why I wouldn't be in the CIA.

But yeah,

it was just like, I don't know what it was about.

We definitely watched the movie a lot and we quoted it in like a really annoying way.

But like, again, my friend, my friend, I'm not going to say his name because he thought he was Walter, really, kind of.

And like one time, you know, he would, he had a gun and he has a lot of guns now.

But he, but he had a gun at the time and some, someone like threatened the younger brother of my friend, you know, just down the bottom of the game.

He was a great violent barring.

Well, truly, I wasn't, but this, this

group of people at this bar that we went to super regularly, and my friend went there and started waving a gun around.

Oh my God.

Wait, what bar was that?

I'm not one of

those.

Oh, hairs.

I remember that bar because it had a rug that really tied the room together.

No.

No, I should have known you don't know any bars there.

Why did I say that?

Of course, you don't know the bar, but yeah, it was like a bar we went to all the time, and then we could never go again because he had waved the gun around.

Yeah, he was kind of out of his element,

yeah, yeah.

He, and we would have, and we would, he would have been saying stuff like that too.

I remember he was waving the gun around.

He's like, Am I wrong?

Wait, what do you mean you remember?

This was when you were a young child.

Gavin's quite a bit younger than I know.

I just want to clarify, though, that he was genuinely

both waving a gun around menacingly and also probably quoting the Big Lebowski.

I bet he's still waving the gun around angrily, but I bet he's calmer than you are.

Is that a reference to?

I think it is.

Okay, some of the

endless amount of quotes on the Big Lebowski subreddit is brutal.

Yeah, you're being very undude.

Yeah,

I am undude.

Gavin, have you seen the movie?

And Brian, have you seen the movie?

And how many times?

One, I've I've seen the movie three or four times.

Because, you know, I only watch movies once.

So this is a movie I've seen.

Might as well be a zillion times.

I hate watching a movie a second time.

So you love this movie.

Well, no.

I did like it a lot and I thought it was very funny, but I didn't want to be anybody in this movie.

I thought the dude was kind of a dork.

So, like, I watched him.

I was like, oh, that's not a bad movie, you know?

But I was like, eh,

I wouldn't want to be this weird freak, you know, this weird hippie freak.

Yeah.

I mean, it's just like, but just, I think it was about relaxation.

It was about comfort, like, oh, dressing for comfort and just kind of having a laid-back kind of vibe.

Sorry, Gavin, what were you saying?

What was it?

This was like one of the first movies it took me like, like 20 times to watch once.

You know what I mean?

I've since watched it in its entirety, but this was like one of those movies for me.

I mean, like you said, I'm a little younger than you, but it was a very like AMC, like, okay, I'll watch this for 30 minutes and commercials kind of weird.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're maybe, maybe it's on late at night and you're sort of falling asleep, or it's, you know, you're not planning to watch it.

So you have something you have to go and do.

So, yeah, that's, I have movies like that.

You know, I want to say, like, Shawshank Redemption was like that for me.

It was just always on TBS constantly.

So you just catch like a bits and pieces of it.

And eventually I saw the whole story.

The sterns and stuff like that.

Yeah.

Brian.

I do want to say to you, Chris, that like I do kind of understand.

Thank you.

Uh, where you were coming from at the time.

I've said this before,

not on this show, but like before I had traveled at all, like I'd been to Kansas.

and Florida.

Those are the only two places I'd ever

go to those places for?

Well, my mom moved to Kansas when I was like in sixth grade.

So I had to go.

Oh, come on.

Or just like

work.

Wait a second.

She was insane and drunk.

Laughing out loud and asking why your mom moved to Kansas.

It elicits a full, like

a bab from Brian.

So it wasn't a word.

Having a child,

having a kid.

Yeah.

And then realizing that me, my brother, and my sister were probably five years old.

And my mom was like, I got to get the fuck out of here.

Oh, she left without you.

No, that's not a good move.

yeah

hey that stinks man that does

she was being very undude no yeah she moved so she's funny talking about using like banklavowski terminology and it's like wow your mom totally did not tie the family together

well so my my my dad one year is like hey you know we'll send the kids can come and stay with you for the summer in oklahoma she had moved

well yeah she had moved to oklahoma at this time.

Halfway through the movie.

Do you know the reason why she moved to Oklahoma?

Was it a work thing?

Yeah.

Yeah.

She's a waitress at a steakhouse.

Was she like mad a lot?

Was she like angry?

No.

What would cause her to move, though, really?

Do you think she was like, would it be like with a husband, with a guy or something like that?

So she moves to fucking Oklahoma and then halfway through the summer, she's like, hey, we're moving to Kansas and didn't tell my dad and also didn't tell him her new phone number or anything like that.

So we were in a weird like kidnapped space for a period of time, but we didn't know.

What do you mean?

Like, who were you kidnapped by?

My mom.

Oh, I oh, took you.

I see.

I see.

She moved us in the middle of a summer.

We were supposed to spend the summer in this, in Oklahoma, and she was like, hey, we got to get out of Oklahoma.

Let's go.

Oh, my God.

Your dad, he was probably so upset.

He was probably like, this aggression will not stand, man.

He was not happy, but it's funny.

My dad was like mad about it.

And then the very next summer sent us back to stay with her for three weeks.

Do you have a list of them in front of you, Gavin?

Be honest.

He does.

He has a list.

So let's take a look here.

But I want to say that, like, there was a period of time when I was probably

20.

Eric Queber.

Yeah, I guess I was Queber.

It's before I traveled, right?

And I used to tell people, I was like, you know, I'm more like a New York type guy than a California type guy, you know?

In what context were they?

I actually get that.

I don't like either of those things.

And

I hate the fucking Eagles, man.

Gavin lives in New York, just to be clear.

And I guess, you know, he's from the West Coast.

So he probably does.

He's actually spent a lot of time in both of the places.

But like, Brian, at the time, you had never been to either of them, right?

Either one.

No, no, no.

I had never been.

And honestly, I'd never even been.

I'd been to the city in Columbus like four times.

You know what I mean?

Seems like we were in Grove, Groveport.

Groveport.

So, so, and also, like, what were they asking you if you were a New York or an L.A.

guy, or were you just offering that information up?

I was offering the information of like, I'm more of a New York guy.

I'm like, you know, I'm quick on my feet.

You know, I'm always

going to end up talking about I'm more of a New York kind of comic.

You know what I mean?

Like, yeah.

But I find out as I'm older and I've been to both places, I was like, I could never live in New York.

I could never live in Los Angeles again because I hate the fucking Eagles, man.

Yeah, and they play them all the time.

I'm with Gavin, though,

not with the Eagles shit.

I don't know what he's talking about, but I'm with him on, I could live in New York and not LA.

I prefer New York.

I think it's a much more well-put-together city.

I say this all the time.

It has like a well-defined center to it.

And it's like LA is just so spread out.

And you never feel like you know where you are.

I just, I hate it.

Totally.

And obviously, Los Angeles is the origin of the band, the Eagles.

And I fucking hate the Eagles.

Oh, I see.

I thought you were

talking about the football team.

You know what I mean?

I was like, what do the Philadelphia Eagles have to do with this?

No, I'm talking about the movie.

Oh, let's take a look.

That's from the movie.

I fucking hate you.

He He does

the fucking Eagles, man.

He has a list for sure.

He's raiding.

Fuck it.

Let's go bowling.

I went to R slash Lebowski.

This guy asked a question.

He goes, why was the dude upset when he found out his vehicle had been recovered?

I don't remember that part of it.

Well, when he was in the bath and the answering machine picked up, he said,

he goes, I conducted a bit of research.

I showed two impartial acquaintances the clip and asked if they think he was happy or upset when he said, far fucking out.

And both of them said he was upset.

One said he thinks it's because he had to get out of the water.

Research notes.

I only asked two people.

It's not like I asked 10 people and decided to only discuss the two that fit my narrative.

Conclusion.

The dude's initial response was one of elation, but when the reality kicked in that this was going to impede upon his peaceful dude time, he became annoyed.

This happened over a matter of seconds.

Thank you, everyone, for your input, and we can now consider this case closed.

Oh, I love when a case gets closed because it's like a lot of time it's left of, you know, I hate those open-ending or you know, open-ended sort of, oh, that's so, this is very cool.

So it's sometimes a case is closed, though, and 30 years later, maybe they'll find a little something else.

Cold case gets reopened.

Well, can I just say that I think these kind of guys, the big Lugbowski guys, they're actually worse than like maybe another film guy, like the A24 guy.

Like, because this is obviously such a formative movie for these people that it actually, it's like ruins their life in a way that, like, I've never experienced with a movie before.

It's like, it's like they kind of weren't, they were like aimlessly moving through life and then they saw this movie and it changed everything about themselves in, in a way that I think is rare for like

Actually, not rare for men in pop culture, but I mean, like, I just have never seen this with a movie before, just dressing like this, doing your hair like this.

I'm sure

it does, I guess, happen.

Probably are going to, people are going to have like examples of where it happens, I guess, in a different sort of way, though.

I think you're right that this is like different in the way that people live their lives like it.

Like, it's not just like the Rocky Horror Picture Show or whatever.

Those guys go to the events and they're doing it, but they're not like.

I'm doing the dude thing.

And that's, I'm telling you, you're right, Gavin.

I was aimlessly floating through life at that point.

Do you know what I mean?

I didn't even, I don't think it was before I even did stand-up stand-up, and I didn't even know.

Oh, yeah, I'm not even supposed to.

Maybe that's actually true because maybe it's actually like a loser that's like worried about like what he's what his life is, how his life is going.

And then he sees this and he's like, Oh, I'm not actually a loser.

I'm not a loser.

I'm the fucking dude, man.

You know,

I'm the dude.

That's all.

And he's the coolest guy in the world.

And that was definitely, I like hid behind that.

I was just like, I was like, oh, yeah, no, this is like how I want to be.

I want to be like drinking white Russians, lounging around in like pajamas while I would go all in.

They couldn't make this movie today, though, because, you know,

you can't make a white Russian with oat milk.

Okay.

It is true that, like, first it ruins your life.

Yeah.

You become annoying.

Basically, yes.

Like, there's something like, and I've talked about doing this episode in the past as movie quote guys, but I really think that's just a chive guy.

You know what I mean?

Like, too similar.

that's too similar yeah but this this turns you into the guy and the guy's a loser like in the movie like yeah he i know that it's made like he's cool and like like gavin said like an a24 guy has at least watched other movies

yeah like being

movie makes you seem so stupid to me yeah i mean those guys are sickening because they do clap they do clap at the company logo you know what i mean yeah yeah yeah that is that is a different type of derange but but i i definitely agree that these

would be an a24 movie like now

most definitely 100

or something and that's kind of like yeah i think that it it's like i think you're

it's absolutely right though that it's like he's not a loser in the movie he is what a loser wants to be and like wants to see themselves as a or a not a loser but rather like a person who does nothing, a very lazy person who does not want to do anything in life.

This is the ideal situation and scenario that they can imagine for themselves.

I think at that point in my life, I had so little drive, like, truly, you know, I didn't really know what I was wanting to do.

I was like,

dropped out of university.

I was like working like warehouse jobs and stuff like that.

I had like no direction.

And I was like, but what if I was the dude?

Yeah, I mean, the dude doesn't have a job either.

No, I think there's a thing.

It's like,

yeah.

Exactly.

I did.

I did go work in a warehouse for 10 hours a day.

Yeah, I did.

I wasn't the dude there.

That's for sure.

I was.

The guys would not accept me being the dude.

The guys dropping, dropping off their fucking.

I'm not even going to say dropping off their loads because Brian's going to get all into that type of stuff and whatever.

So this is, it did say case closed, but it actually wasn't closed.

Some other people.

Oh, so it got reopened, like Gavin said.

Gavin told me about this kind of thing.

Yeah.

Synapse.

I've never seen.

Sorry, what's that a reference to?

I don't know that name of that.

Is that the Big Lebowski?

A movie, Mystic River.

What do you mean?

The Big Lebowski?

A movie?

It's a similar.

I mean, the Blake Lebowski is not a movie.

It's the way of life.

I only watched it during that time.

Like you're saying, that is the true thing that I would just watch it over and over again.

Just, I want to clarify, though.

I quickly realized, I think this probably lasted for about two months of my life, maybe and then i was like oh no this is like not that

well hey let's take a second here let's let's take a second guys

um just here

just take one

reverend gary yeah hey man welcome to do this meditation with reverend gary

today we will be doing a simple five-minute meditation perfect for anyone who is looking to keep their mind limber.

It doesn't matter if you are a beginner or an experienced meditator.

I invite you to join me in these five minutes of chill.

Oh,

the five minutes of chill.

So, like,

find a seat or lie down on your favorite rug.

Maybe engage in some free-form tai chi-like motion.

It's up to you, so long as your posture allows you to tell your mind to chill, relax, and just be present.

Two years ago

yeah yes yes this is a two-year-old video

so

you want this to be 12 years old this is one of those videos that you see and you're like i hope this is a 12 year old video yeah i hope people aren't still doing this kind of so so brian did you in your research did you what what year did the the the dude come out hey can i just say that like straight to camera the dude abides and uh i don't know about you but i take comfort in that that's well you're going to hear a lot of stuff like that.

Don't worry.

It's a 1998 movie.

Okay, so 1998.

I mean, say what you want about National Socialism, but dude, it had its ethos, you know?

So I'm just realizing now, I'm realizing now 1998.

So I, because I'm 40 years old.

It's crazy.

It's so cool.

But I, I would have been, I was only like 14 when this movie came out.

That's how old I was.

So I was,

man, I was just a fucking, I was like, so when this was happening, I was like 15 years old, maybe when I was just at the height of like learning about getting drunk and smoking weed and stuff like that.

And I was just like completely an idiot.

So I think I was being, you know what?

I think I might be wrong.

I think I'm, I think it might have been later on.

I might have gone through my dude phase later on when I was like 17 or 18.

That's bad.

Yeah, that's bad.

Because I mean, because if you saw the movie at that age, like, you know, I saw like Super Bad at like 13 going into high school, and I was like, okay, beer and pussy.

Like, that's what I was doing.

And I just, yeah, because

we drove around.

We drove around.

You know, guys, I'll say this.

We were driving around.

We weren't on the bus.

So we were not.

Well, you were driving around, and your friend he was driving probably had like some kind of

maybe we were holding some kind of drink and you'd have to be like, hey, careful, man.

There's a beverage there.

Yeah.

Well, it was, it was, of course,

what's his name who was driving?

Uh,

my friend,

Walter, who would wave his gun around and stuff.

And, and another thing that my friend, I'll call him Walter, his real name is Tim.

Um, but he would also, he thought he would buy these cars that were kind of older and he didn't really care about.

And then he thought it was funny.

We would go and like go where there was a bunch of people and he would go and like get into an accident on purpose.

So he would go like hit a bunch of stuff and then be like, ah, and then everyone would run over and he would just like jump in his car and drive off.

He was a really funny guy, like super, super funny guy.

We used to do a really funny thing where like we'd be at a stoplight.

And if there was a car in front of us, we'd honk at the guy.

And then when he turned around and went like this, we'd flip him off.

And then if he got out of the car, we'd beat him up.

What the fuck?

See, that's not.

Yeah, that's not

different.

That's like serious violence, like road rage, like initiating road rage violence.

That's just how it is.

You know, sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you.

Well,

probably from it, too.

Can you please stop?

The thing about that story is it's just so in line with all the stuff that Brian would do.

Now, but who so you're telling me, but you said you didn't beat up old people.

So you're telling me all these people you would do that to.

I mean, an older person's not going to get out of their car to fight you.

An older guy.

An older guy.

I mean, I don't think I got almost got into a fight, but I was walking my dog and my dog sniffed this guy like on leash, sniffed this guy and his wife as he was walking by, like not, didn't touch him or anything.

And the guy like almost hit my dog, like, get, get, like, and I was like, hey, chill, you know, you don't have to go.

I was with my baby as well.

And I was like, you don't got to act like that.

I would have whipped it.

He was an older man with his wife, though.

He's an older man with his wife.

And he's just like, well, exactly.

This is what he said to me.

He's like, some people don't want a dog's dirty nose rubbing up against them, you know?

And he's like, I don't like it.

And neither does she.

He said about his wife.

And his wife didn't care at all.

She was like very happy to like pet the dog.

He was just

beating him up in front of his wife.

I'm not going to get into a fight with my, I'm not going to get into a fight with my baby there.

I said to him, that's why I said to him, I was like, that's why you're talking to me like this because my baby's here.

You know that, you know, that's why you're talking to me like this.

And then I seen him.

I seen him like two days ago.

And he had an umbrella, a wooden umbrella in his hand.

And it was not raining and there was no clouds in the sky.

So I think he started arming himself with that thing in case there was some altercation so he could assault me with it.

I'll keep you guys updated.

I'll keep you guys updated on the

interesting what you do for like you know, recreation in kind of the suburbs, you know, because like what I do for recreation is I kind of just drive around, I bowl, have the occasional acid flashback, you know.

Yeah, see, I, I, that's just not what I do for fun.

This is what I go.

I have to, I take my baby and a dog out for a walk in the morning.

It's called, it's It's called living a life.

Yeah, man.

Oh, I do that.

It's that your body should be like, not the problem, man.

You dig?

Oh, fuck.

Now we are in a place where we can begin to meditate.

Far out.

Far out.

Dude.

I hate far out.

Let your muscles kick back and relax.

Allow yourself to feel all loose and groovy.

then close your eyes and begin to take a deep breath oh okay

pay attention to your breath allow it to move in a slow and rhythmic way

inhale slowly hold your breath for a beat then exhale you're not doing hey can you pause it can you pause it he's he's not doing any dude references or talking give him a second give him a second holding it Letting that shit go.

There you go.

There you go.

He doesn't let you have like...

like

he gives, it gets you, you know.

Uh, well, let's look at a few posts and then we'll get back to this weird guy.

Um,

the, the, let's, let's take a look at this.

We haven't even heard that weird guy yet.

I don't think you just brought him up.

Oh, would you like to hear?

Let's hear him.

Yeah, let's hear a little bit from that weird guy.

We saw him.

He's dressed a lot like the dude.

He's got, he's got kind of his hair is a bit different than the dudes.

It's like not wavy, you know, it's too straight.

And it's not gray enough either, you know, or whatever.

Or, like, it's, I guess, his is like blondish gray, right?

Here we go.

This is a guy, dude.

Is it for real or just another mock religion?

Just another mock question on this episode of the incident.

You like, you like

another mock religion.

Is it just another mock religion?

I'm the dude.

Hey, hey, the dude, but the dude abide.

This guy does not have the accent for the dude.

Yeah, he doesn't have the accent.

The dude abides with some fucking gambo.

Yeah, this guy doesn't.

I would not listen to this guy in the dude averse at all.

What is it?

I thought that this was dudeism, not Jabroniaism.

Hey, get over here.

Help us.

Drop walking.

Now it's a dude.

I'm the Reverend Gary M.

Sylvia.

And this is a limited time.

Oh, keep the glasses on, Reverend.

Reverend Gary, you need to do some man cow work.

You did the big eye reveal, and it's like, it is not looking good underneath.

Usually, Reverend, I tell people to stay away from the light, but I think your eyes need something.

Something is going wrong here.

So it's at the ins and outs of dudeism.

Dude is

on camera.

You can tell you're out having a few beers with your buddies.

You get around to telling them you're a dudist.

Then they ask, the hell are you blathering about?

If your friends are not already hip to the idea of dudism, then they may have a couple of common questions like, is it fake?

As in a facade-like Maka pretending to be a religion?

Or is Dudaism meant to satirically mock other religions?

These questions may have a sound.

We know all about that.

He might take a shot at some people that we have.

You better not say a goddamn word about his noodly appendages because I have a feeling where this is going, Gavin.

I'm a Pastafari, and I have been for 20, 20 years, 22 years

And so I feel like that's kind of, that's what they're doing.

Off of his accent, maybe he was actually a Pastafarian in the past.

Yeah, I mean, I think he probably is a different type of Pastafari.

He's like, this guy.

Hey, look, if you got some friends and they don't understand what this is, I probably assume they're probably not going to be your friend much longer.

I mean, yeah,

they're going to have a few questions for you, like,

what the fuck you talking talking about

25 years ago.

Are you talking about I vaguely recall that film?

Yeah, that's not even the best Cohen Brothers film.

Is it the Cohen brothers going to get a job?

Yeah.

So sorry, can you like can you pay your rent next month though?

Or

like that's really what this combo is about, bro.

So you're gonna drink all day?

Like

every day?

A big part of dudeism is actually you living in a basement suite.

Yeah, and also

Above you is like a family of like five.

Oh, yeah, a family living a life.

Yeah.

The thing about it, too, that you can't discount, because I remember about it, was that he has had to drink so much milk.

I know.

I know.

But he does also half and half at a period.

Yeah, but it's just when you're drinking white Russians, like, oh, tonight at the party, I'm going to drink white Russians.

You're just drinking like a gallon of milk.

It's very funny.

that that's the body of christ in dudaism well i'll bet you if i looked hard enough that is what we would find so i did look at this this guy in in r slash labowski posted a picture of his sign that says labowski this is pre-american election says lubowski 2024 this aggression will not stand man oh gavin don't get gavin started he's very political we don't want to get him started in fact we're known as a non-very political no no jill stein in a switch don't get into don't say that on politics voice we voted for trump uh so anyway this is

either you know there's people just check out this podcast randomly they don't jill stein in all seven states i live in canada and so i am totally cool i of course voted for pier poliev i'm just joking i don't vote for anybody in canada yeah i wrote my dad can you guys actually comfort me for a second i have been feeling really bad about the election Can you just say some words of comfort after?

Yeah, this is coming out right after the inauguration.

Sympathy.

I don't need your fucking sympathy, man.

I need my fucking Johnson.

See him reading again.

So the guy pulls out.

So the guy posts a picture of the sign he put in his yard.

Like I said, it says Lebowski 2024.

This aggression will not stand, man.

That's funny.

It's funny the idea of it.

Can you imagine?

I prefer Prison Mike for President 2020.

That's who I voted for.

This first comment is from Off Fuck is his name.

And he goes, I live in a very red county.

I wore this Lebowski 2024 shirt to a public event last weekend and caught a lot of eyebrows and grimaces.

Pretty sure they thought I was repping some third-party pseudo-lib when really I was just trying to find a cash machine.

So he's just like, I'm very conservative.

And but the issue here was that, yeah, I guess my fellow conservatives didn't think I was because of my Lebowski.

Why is he calling that?

Why does he need a cash machine?

Well, that's a quote from the movie, I believe.

He's looking for a cash machine.

Oh, I see.

Okay, so he's doing the annoying thing.

He did a quote, but he also before he told a story about wearing a shirt and people being like, whoa, are you really voting for Lebowski?

Who's the one who's like, he's freaking people out?

That's kind of combining two different kinds of guys.

It's like guys that wear like shirts with words on them.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah.

It's like, oh, on the back, when we were like, what's on the back of the big Lebowski 2024 shirt?

You know what I mean?

I would say, like, yeah, the president abides or something like that.

Here's a good one.

Here's a good one from Krakatoa 83.

He goes, I would never vote for Lebowski.

I might vote for the dude, though.

Oh, because Lebowski is also the other guy.

That's where the whole mix-up was.

Good joke.

Good joke.

Thank you.

Yeah.

but he's also but you would be voting for a bowski though

philip seymour but he he's his son is uh i sometimes i'll see his son acting and it's like i can see it's like is that him you know red lantern's eye says a chicken in every pot and it's not him there's can i just say that sorry brian there it's not him there's no heroin in his son so it doesn't count don't don't say that Don't say that about Philip.

Don't say that about Philip.

It's one of the things that made him talented.

Who's the distributor?

And why is this not being mass produced?

Finally, some sense in the world.

Well, I think it probably it is being mass produced.

I think probably, right?

I don't think that that's like it's probably from the tribe or something, don't you think?

Yeah.

Well, here's a problem that happened right before the election, Chris.

Uh-huh.

I'm going to show you this.

I got to show you guys this first, okay?

Because it's a post with a quote.

And it says, are these Nazis, Walter?

And it's a picture of the whoever was speaking at the Republican National Convention.

Now,

some guys in the

subreddit, not so happy that somebody would say such a thing.

So first they first they do a bunch of quotes.

Oh, fuck it.

Ah, fuck it.

This is your answer to everything.

I suggest you do what your parents did and get a job, sir.

The bums will always lose.

So that's a little riff.

But then this guy goes, That's the best comment.

Since when did this sub turn into a political sub?

It should be about the reason it exists, our love of the movie.

I hope the moderator sees this because hopefully they'll agree this post has nothing to do with the big Lebowski.

Let's just laugh and have fun and leave politics out of it because we all know where that leads to.

Agreed.

Agreed.

Honestly.

Avak, man.

You're sitting, you're getting inundated with this politics all day.

You just want to go to the fucking Reddit and talk about the dude and White Rush and some bowling and stuff.

You don't need to be inundated with it there.

You either live longer.

You live long enough to be the dude or you live long enough to become a fascist.

Yeah.

It's funny as hell to me to be like,

wait a minute.

We're not even talking about the movie anymore on here.

Like, how many more words can you say?

About one movie that came out in 1998.

Like, how is their conversation?

I couldn't find much.

Well, yeah, it's because like that guy is like, do you think he was actually mad when he said this line?

Like, that's what they're kind of, they've gotten to now, you know?

It's also just like funny to see, like, someone that, you know, this happens to all people as they get older.

They become so like.

strangely conservative and lose all their values of the thing that they appreciated from like 30 years ago even just to like you know and the irony is lost on them i think it's yeah yeah it's happening to brian actually i was well this guy goes, this guy goes, the title of the post is a quote from the movie.

Nazis are referenced three times in the Big Lebowski.

And I didn't count it, but then our guy that's mad about the political content goes, I'm very aware the title of the post was in the movie.

Like many of you, I love this movie and I've seen it over 100 times.

I'm talking about the redundancy of the quote and equating it to Trump and Trump supporters.

It's old.

It's not funny.

It's not cute.

It's not original.

I'm very well aware that Nazis and politics are in the movie.

I'm known in this Reddit is mostly, I know that he fucked this up, by the way.

It says, I know.

I'm no.

This is Reddit.

Okay.

No, the reason that he's doing that is because otherwise he'll get accused of the fucking.

Yeah, the guy goes, I'm known.

He goes, I'm known.

This is Reddit.

And it's mostly left-leaning individuals, which, by the way,

have

Reddit's all left-wing.

All I'm saying is that this sub should focus more on the movie and less on politics.

Downvote me all you want, everyone.

I stand by my comments, dude.

You're fucking this sub up.

I love people who go Reddit, like, go full martyr on the Reddit, like

stand up on the mountain, like, down vote me all you want.

Like, I'll say it anyways.

Oh, cool.

I know it'll get downvoted.

Yeah, as if there's repercussions, yeah, yeah.

Oh, there is.

Oh, my karma, yeah, exactly.

Your karma, my karma, that's real.

Yeah, she was gonna take my karma.

That's how you get to heaven.

I don't know what Reddit Karma does, really, to be honest.

I don't know, but Mr.

Peeper's 1986 says, uh, the dummy crats seem desperate.

I can't say I love the gop, but they're much better than the evil of the modern left.

So that guy didn't get mad about that pose at all.

And then this next guy goes, left this community because of the political shit.

Came back because I love the big Lebowski.

Leaving again because actual Nazis are

calling Trump and Trump supporters Nazis.

Then telling people to keep fucking quiet when they voice their thoughts or opinions.

Funny how the left calls everyone on the right a Nazi, then tries to shut up people on the right with literal violence.

Fuck y'all.

So that's that's and then

yeah, yeah.

And then then

if people listen to our podcast not going to help that argument, we have a known leftist who used to engage in random violence on people.

I'm not a leftist.

You're a known leftist.

I'm actually a known super leftist.

You're a known super leftist.

You're a knownist.

You're a known

me as well.

I'm also a leftist.

I'm more leftist.

Well, maybe you are.

I agree you are, but you're not known.

Brian is actually known that way.

And here he is.

We find out that he definitely did exactly like this person said, where it's like, oh, he doesn't get his way.

So he just does violence with his, with his gang.

Hmm.

I don't know.

You know what?

I bet the dude would want to free Palestine.

How about that?

Yeah.

He would.

He would for sure.

The dude was a leftist.

Thank you.

Was that?

I think the dude was a leftist.

I think, yeah.

I think the dude was

progressive.

Was he?

But he hung out with Walter.

Walter's his friend.

And I feel like Walter was conservative.

one post in here where they're kind of arguing about the dude's politics.

And a guy's like, hey, that's neat.

Anyway, you're still wrong about the dude's politics because they were saying he might be a libertarian.

Well, because, well, because, yeah, Walter is obviously conservative.

You know what?

He's always going on about Vietnam.

It's like, what the fuck does this have to do with Vietnam?

What does fuck does anything have to do with Vietnam?

Yeah, stop it.

And he,

but he, he definitely, maybe he's a libertarian.

Maybe they're all libertarian.

Yeah, maybe they're libertarians.

I mean, so let's uh take a look at some great dudes in history.

First, we'll play a little bit more of this guy because this is from him.

This is from his website, great dudes in history.

You're not going to believe this, but there is an online store on the website where you can get like ordained a dudist minister or like get a Jesus fish that says dude is on the inside.

So really, this is this guy's hustle.

So, and how much does it cost?

And

when are we doing it?

Oh, if it's expensive, i'll get you one oh no that's the opposite of

accusational tone and you may feel threatened but before you go pulling a gun on the lanes to defend dudism let us consider how we as dudas can answer these provocative questions in a kindly and chill manner The problem is that Dudaism sometimes gets grouped in with other modern religions, when in fact, we're not very much like them at all, beyond the seeming newness of our founding.

For this discussion, we'll look at two types of mock religions.

I contemplate how they are.

Don't say a fucking mock dude.

Don't even speak.

Listen, there's more fucking lore behind that than anything.

Yours is based on a fucking movie.

This is like,

this is real life we're talking about with Pastafarianism.

By the way, I hate his goatee.

I do.

It's not one of those grand goatees, like the mustache and goatee is really long, like Sebastian Gorka.

Kind of really,

it really looks like a fake one, you know.

Like, it looks like it's sort of stuck on to make a child look old or something.

I know, and I hate to judge somebody off their looks, but I do know his chin is as sunken as his eyes.

He very much does not have a lot underneath that.

That's the reason why it's so thick.

Yeah.

And the mocking religion.

When they first hear of dudeism, people often start with.

So, like, it's a little bit of a.

Okay, so the guy they showed, by the way,

as like the stuck-up, pretentious guy who dared to ask why you devote your whole life to this 1998 Cohen Brothers film,

was

really kind of, he was kind of looked like Gavin.

He looked like Gavin, to be honest.

Yeah, he's a hipster, but sort of a spinning image of Gavin.

So I don't know if that hurt to see Gavin.

I'm fucking, I'm fucking appalled, but at least he put his glasses glasses back on.

This motherfucker looks like he's always a pirate for Halloween, huh?

Well, I'm not sure what you mean, but he definitely has some terrible-looking eyes, and I'm very happy that he's put his shades on, and they're black.

Oh, check it.

You can't see any of his eyes, which is definitely for the best.

But it's still like a real religion, man.

Get it?

Oh, he took them off again, Gavin.

Sometimes they can.

He keeps putting them on and taking them off.

This video has a lot of ins and a lot of outs and

a lot of what-have-yous.

Yeah.

Well, a mock-up religion.

These are organizations that simulate being a religion, but they are more like the facades on those old-timey movie sets.

At first glance, they look like other religions.

Do you know

that there's stuff outside of movies, sir?

Do you know that foreigners?

These guys

is the whole thing of life.

He said those are movie sets, you know, but the big Lebowski is actually shot on location.

I forgot.

Yeah, so they didn't use sets, you know.

I think they might have sometimes, but no,

they were not on studio.

You're right.

You're right.

Everything was

nothing on the sound stage.

You don't think?

You think?

No, I think

you can actually type in Big Lebowski on Google Maps.

You're going to probably see a lot of locations and they're going to have a lot of five stars.

Well, let me give you a couple.

This is going to come out.

This is going to come out the first holiday of 2025.

Wow.

Is Palo Minds Day, and that's February 13th.

And he says, Valentine's Day can put a lot of pressure on couples.

It'd be a real drag for those who are single.

Well, we don't care.

Instead of celebrating romantic love, the dudist Palo Minds Day celebrates pals, friendship, and good buddies.

Occurs one day before Valentine's Day so that those who are in romantic relationships can celebrate it as well.

Hold on a damn second.

This is not dudist.

You know what I mean?

The dude wouldn't feel jealous

or care or be worried.

He's just moving through life.

He doesn't need a day to celebrate his friends.

He just

celebrates them.

He just meets people.

And every day,

just by way of knowing him is the celebration, that's all you need, really.

I would venture to guess that maybe this holiday took place on the 14th one year and he didn't have anybody to celebrate with because he's the only single guy that he knew.

And he might be the only guy.

He might be the only person he knows.

He made a holiday for it.

And then he did have to move it, though, in 2017 because he met this girl

playing League of Legends or something.

And they started dating.

And so he needed to do a Valentine's Day, but they broke up.

But then he can't move it back.

So he keeps it up.

I love the idea that he had a girlfriend and she was like, can we not do the Lebowski thing this year?

Yeah.

Honestly, can you imagine?

That's the saddest.

That's the saddest reality.

Anxiety about this guy's life.

Yeah, that's the saddest reality that I can imagine is him finding a girl, and she's not into the big Lebowski.

He really loves it.

So first things first, we got to get it out of the way.

Before I ask you anything about yourself, you're going to have to sit down and watch this fucking movie.

Yeah.

And and then and then he's just look he's doing the awful movie thing he's looking at her face and all the parts and he's like stopping himself from saying the lines you know but he's still kind of saying them under his breath a little bit like it was a double date too and his friend was like bro you scot you cannot put the big labowski on like you're scaring the hoes dude yeah big labowski's scaring the hoes honestly he's like what do you not love it do you not he's like no i love it dude i love it i love it i love it but it's my girl does not love it like she's already seen it a bunch of times yeah this is this guy i hope his life is cooler than what we're imagining she gets up to go to the bathroom and she's about to leave the room and he's like wait wait stop you got to see this part

here i'll pause it i'll pause it and then you know she hits him with the devastating like you don't have to pause it you know yeah and she wants to go to the like her plan is to just go to the bathroom and sit down for a minute and look at her phone

she doesn't have to go she doesn't have have to go, Brian.

She's like, She's just going to go like at work.

I used to do at work.

I worked this really horrible job in

a call center or whatever.

I would just find it.

Go to the bathroom and like jerk off while you're sitting on this.

I mean, I wouldn't J-O.

Brian knows all about that.

No, don't say it like that.

Yeah, I won't.

I'll clarify.

Brian didn't jack off.

What he did was he recommended somebody for a job, got them the job, and then they got fired for jacking off at their desk at a call center.

Yeah, it was just at the desk though.

So then Brian kept working there afterwards as the guy who recommended

dude who never brought it up to me.

Oh, no, I'm not sure they didn't bring it up to you.

You're like, this is one of the best guys I know.

You are going to want to hire him.

This guy is nice.

Honestly, this guy is like, he's always really engaged.

He's always

not horny at all.

He's not too horny at all.

I love the idea of you're getting a guy a job and you're like, he's a hard worker and he's not horny all that often.

I'll be honest with you i've never seen him get way too horny and he sits real he sits real close to the desk he sits i do think i've said this before and i'll say it again i do think

that it was just this was 2001

so it was 9-11 9-11.

9-11 did happen while i was there but it's 2000 2001 and i truly truly believe that it was his first access to a ton of porno you know what i mean because he's like one of those North Koreans fighting for Russia right now.

I mean,

those North Koreans are seeing porn for the first time in Russia, and they're now getting sniped in the head because they keep watching.

Hey, Gavin, stop trying to make it political.

Gavin is like a notoriously political comedian.

He's doing

these

North Koreans are fighting for Russia right now, and they're dying because they keep watching porn and they're like, holy fuck, black guys, they look really cool.

Okay, you can't.

Hangover is February 27th to March 6th, and that is a weekish-long celebration beginning February 27th with National Kahlua Day and culminating on the day of the dude, March 6th.

This is sort of a dudist Lent where we kick back and appreciate the simple pleasures of life instead of chasing after the more complicated, yeah, painful ones.

It's kind of like Lent where you kind of give something up, except you actually go into a complete fervor of alcoholism

where you drink a lot of Kahlua on Kalua National Kahlua Day, which is I also didn't know existed.

They think they invented it probably.

So

this is really kind of

a sad thing to

think of because

the thing they're talking about is responsibilities, like the thing where

we don't worry about those things that like

Like being a normal person with responsibilities, you just sit or lays around like the dude.

Can I say that?

Uh, take it easy stir, which is the same day as Christian Easter.

Uh, whereas the Christians celebrate the resurrection of Christ on this day, due to celebrate the relaxation of uptights, by acknowledging that springs always follows winter, we remind ourselves that we can't be worried about that shit.

Life goes on, man.

Wait, what?

What was the beginning part of it?

What was the beginning part of it?

It's it's uh due to celebrate the relaxation of uptights.

It's

the relaxation of Easter.

What's the relaxation of uptights?

Like uptights are the people who are not dudists?

I probably, yeah, they're like the Apostafarians, I think, have a name for them too.

Like, just but he goes, uh, life goes on, man.

In keeping with the fertility ritual traditions of esoteric, the pagan tradition upon which Easter may have actually be based, this can be a good time to make prayers at the shrine of our special lady.

I'll go ahead and who's the special lady?

It's not the dude.

Here it is, Chris.

You'll recognize her.

Okay.

From the movie.

Oh, it's from the movie.

Oh, I didn't expect that.

Yeah.

It's

the lady, the artist lady.

Yeah.

Who played by Julie?

What's her name?

Well, let me go to this thing.

Gavin, Gavin, you're a big Hollywood guy.

What's the lady's name?

Red Hair.

She's in Boogie Knights as well.

Very famous actor.

She's mostly julianne more julianne moore that's who plays that role i believe

well let's look at this page i'm sorry i kind of got emotional there after brian was reading that

great dudes in history pillars of dudism these dudist prophets and peacemakers have existed throughout history proud we are of all of them uh lao zhu creator of taoism lao zhu oh shout out to lao zu i didn't okay shut up

so people are just

people who are like super chill, they're saying this is kind of the idea of this guy.

Listen, I just say something.

Yeah.

Being a man is maybe the saddest thing you can be.

Like, it actually fucking sucks.

Like, shout out to all my men, my guys.

Yeah, well, this is the guys' podcast, you know, and we do discover that quite regularly: that there is a profound sadness to being a man a lot of the time.

I love all your dumbasses and all your laughter.

Well, let's not get wild.

Let's not get get wild.

Let's not get wild.

Not all of you.

You got to get obsessed with some things.

We do not respect single guys in the lifestyle, but every other one.

I do want to also point out that there is a forum on here, but it's been under

construction for several years.

So I couldn't look through it.

Lao Tzu, when things got screwed up in ancient China, Lao Tzu didn't get all Mr.

Miyagi and try to fix it.

He got on his buffalo and took off for more copacetic pastures.

Copacetic.

Copacetic.

That's one we haven't said.

That's one that's used a lot.

Copacetic, right?

They got fucking buffalo in China.

I guess, but not

scribbling down a few what have-yous that helped define Eastern philosophy ever since.

The next one's Heraclitus,

who is a Greek philosopher, the man who wrote you can never step into the same river twice, propagated the idea that everything is in flux or, quote, burning.

Consequently, one should make the most of it, spark one up whenever possible, and step into the river from time to time, preferably with a cocktail and an inner tube.

A cocktail?

Oh, I think I should be one specific.

An inner tube.

You don't know what an inner tube is?

I can explain that for you.

Oh, I know what an inner tube is.

Do you really not know what you're doing?

What you would be doing with one?

What the fuck?

Like in Asheville, North Carolina, they have a river.

That's

a lazy river.

Yeah, Gavin, you know this.

In Penticton, they have one.

Penticton.

Yeah, Penticton, they have one.

And also, there's somewhere else like close

close by that has one.

Lake Cowichan on the island also has one.

Look, I know what an inner tube is.

I'm not.

Well, I think you don't know what an inner tube is.

And now you're reading it and I see that you're looking it up and you clearly are.

Yeah.

I am not.

I'm looking directly into the camera.

I know what an inner tube is, and I've always known what one is.

But yeah.

I just don't know why they would be sitting in one.

Is that

you go down a lazy river as the dude?

That's is that I think that's the dude.

Was that in the movie?

No, but it's just something he would taking a lot of liberties on what the dude would and wouldn't do.

And I know you're a purist.

I know you're a furist.

I'm trying to get on a forum and start yelling at you.

He's a purist of the thing.

It's like they're all doing these kind of things that the dude would not fucking does not.

You don't think that the dude would go on a lazy river?

Maybe he just doesn't have river access.

Where does he live again?

California, LA.

Yeah, it's not really a thing that happens there.

Well, but it's not a thing people do in in the Los Angeles River.

You know what they do?

They drive race cars in it.

Yeah, I know, because it doesn't have all the movies.

That's in the movies.

Yeah, I know.

So, so I just think that if he lived in a different area, I could see this as being definitely a favorite pastime of the dude.

I mean, the only thing is like, and we haven't mentioned Donnie.

Donnie would come along.

He'd be happy to be there, but Walter would probably be complaining, you know?

Yeah.

I think Donnie is the one I relate to the most.

After an hour,

fucking kill himself.

I agree.

Brian is definitely the most.

Like, I think Donnie is what you're the most, probably.

Me?

No, Brian.

I would say Brian is like, has Donnie vibes.

Not a bad way, though, in like a good way.

You know, like, I like that.

I'm probably like one of those nihilists.

Yeah, yeah.

These men are nihilists.

I actually don't care what I don't care anything.

I believe in nothing.

That's what they want to do.

That's a crazy thing to say.

I don't believe in nothing.

I can't even believe that.

Let's

take a look at this next guy before we play a little more of the dudism clip.

This guy is Snoopy.

Okay.

So it's getting kind of funny now.

You know what I mean?

Snoopy.

Always living up to the dictum, it's a dog's life.

He also famously said, my life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning.

And yet I'm happy I can't figure it out.

What am I doing right?

Okay, so wait.

For their second guy on the list,

they had to go with a dog.

Yeah.

And then finally, fourth guy.

Fourth guy?

Jeffrey Lebowski.

The dude.

So

there's only two guys.

Who are the first two?

Heraclites or whatever?

Oh, and Al Su.

That was the one I met.

Yeah, Snoopy.

So they've had to go to a dog.

And then the guy himself.

It's on a great list.

The Uber dude.

Not literally, because Uber wasn't around when the big Lebowski came out.

So we're not talking about driving.

It is something he probably would do.

I agree.

I agree that if the dude was around nowadays, he would be driving Uber and Lyft for sure.

Most definitely.

Yeah.

I mean, I'm sure that's what our guy is.

But he wouldn't be hustling.

Imagine you hired a fucking, okay.

You say you're someone that loves this movie, right?

And then you're like, okay, I need this XYZ done around my house.

So I hire a task rabbit to come.

And then, so that, and you're like, all right, I need to get these shelves up.

I don't know how to do it.

So the task rabbit comes.

And then, and then he gets there and it's the fucking dude.

All right.

You're going to be pissed.

Well, maybe.

Dude, he's taking his damn time.

Yeah, but maybe it's like, hey, this sucks.

I got to call another task rabbit person after this to get it properly done.

But at least I'll fucking hang with the dude for a bit.

Maybe smoke one, fucking relax a bit.

Maybe do it.

What if it's Reverend Gary?

Oh, if Reverend Gary shows up to do anything, I'm locking the door when I see him on the camera outside and I'm calling law enforcement immediately.

Reverend Gary makes me very nervous.

If Reverend Gary shows up, I'm calling the SWAT team.

I'm telling them shoot on site.

I don't think you can do that.

And I would never do that, just to be clear.

I don't think you can tell the SWAT team to shoot on site.

They don't mean to parody other French faiths.

They intend to become one in their own right.

That's why they are, for this discussion, a mock-up religion.

Literally built to look like a religion for the sake of looking like a religion.

This is the church of the sub-genius.

Founded sometime in the 70s.

The church of the sub-genius follows.

Well, wait a minute.

Now, I know I have no room to talk about flubs, but I think he said

the church of the sub-genius.

Yeah, no, he really, this is a really nasty pronunciation here.

Here we go.

Founded sometime in the 70s.

The church of the sub-genius.

is that what it is?

No, it's the church of the sub-genius.

So, he said, Yeah, he better not talk about Christianity or something because nobody fucks with Jesus.

Okay,

no, it's not Jesus.

It's literally nobody fucks with the Jesus.

He literally pronounces it.

And somebody who's seen the movie and not just reading it off of the internet would know that.

I know about Jesus.

They made a second movie about him, a spin-off.

Yeah, but it's genes.

I like that.

Yes, they did.

I like that movie.

They did.

It's called Jesus Roll or something.

Who made it?

Not the Cohen brothers made it?

No, no, no.

John Turro.

John Tratura made it.

Oh,

it's not.

It's not like a real, like the Cohen brothers didn't make it.

It's not like a real movie.

Nobody fucks with the Jesus.

Keep in mind, I've only seen the movie with closed captioning on because my mother is hearing impaired.

Oh, that's if you fucking laugh at me.

I never had sound on on my tvs out of respect and solidarity

the next one's not true the first part's my that's not true that's not true the part about you listen to stuff i know you did i've seen you watch things no i never i never do i only watch closed captioning i put ear i put earplugs in even if there is sound in solidarity with my mother sorry brian sorry about this uh sorry everyone uh the next one is major duder same date as buddhist magapuha i guess this is the day of the year in which buddhists affirm their determination to purify their minds of un-Buddhist intentions and concerns.

Likewise, dudists use this time to

purify our minds,

purify their minds of unbudded ones.

So that's where you.

Next one's April Dude's Day.

That's April 1st.

April Dude's Day.

That's not great.

That one's the best one.

That one's the best name.

April's Dude's best one.

April Dude's Day.

Because honestly, April Fool's Day, it's like you should keep that one.

Just keep April Fool's Day.

Yeah, it should be a different day.

April Dude's Day is awesome.

As a great dude in history, Mark Twain put it.

This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other 364 days.

On this day, we celebrate the foolishness of the human race and also the sense of humor that allows us to abide that foolishness.

So that's

that's the I hate when they start talking in that serious kind of way about it.

So let's look at some reviews of the Big Lebowski before we get out of here.

That's a good idea.

Are these on Yelp?

This is on Rotten Tomatoes.

Oh, we love Rotten Tomatoes.

That's where you go, Gavin, to find scores, to find if a movie is good.

But don't worry about the popcorn score because it has been.

It's the only real score.

No, but it would be if it was actually real, but it's not.

It's somehow they figured out how to game it, you know?

This guy gave it one star.

He just watched it November 26, 2024.

So this is fresh.

Okay.

Not literally, he gave it one star, but you know what I mean.

Yeah, kind of confusing to refer to it as fresh in this context, but yes, I do know what you mean.

Here we go.

This was a genuine waste of two hours.

I understand that the point of the movie is that there is no point, but aside from a few good shots, the writing made it feel like the entire theme of the movie was fuck it.

Apparently, there's something to say about each character being a different type of personality and that the dude is drifting through through all of it.

But I think that's a stretch, to say the least.

Almost nothing about the movie was engaging.

I checked the progress halfway through, thinking it was almost over because it felt like it took forever and yet got nowhere.

I would go as far as to say that the movie Twilight has more redeeming quality.

Whoa,

I would say that I'd prefer to listen to a nickelback album than watch this film.

This is pure crap.

Ola.

Listen, it's,

I mean, I don't really remember the movie that well.

I feel like it does have sort of a neandering plot, which is kind of the point.

But yeah,

I think one star is pretty low for it.

It's got some good acting in it, right?

It's got some good shits, but it's funny.

Yeah.

Well,

that's just like your opinion, man.

Dr.

T says, one star, absolute dog.

No idea why anyone with a brain would enjoy this horrible concoction of scenes.

I see why it's popular in America, though.

Oh, nice.

Hey,

I'm scot-free on this one up here in Canada.

No shots fired at me.

KCM gave it one star and said, hated the whole thing.

Unfunny film about a dirty, lazy slob calling himself the dude who swears incessantly and gets into some unfunny scrapes involving a kidnap.

Only plays Skittles as an interest.

No doubt he's the type of person many fans of the genre genre will aspire to be like.

What a sad reflection.

That's kind of accurate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This guy says, one star.

I can't be the only one that thought this was thoroughly unimpressed.

That's what he says.

One of the weirdest all-over movies I've ever seen.

I wouldn't say weird in a good way.

The plot never really pulled me in, and I was kind of looking for the next plot point, not to gobble it up, but more so to catch on to something.

I don't quite understand what that part of the review, not to gobble it up.

I didn't see much comedy through it i got a few good laughs out of me which he gave it one star yeah if you get a couple good laughs in a movie i don't know i think it's worth two stars i give a star per good laugh but maybe that's i don't know because i don't feel like a movie will often make me really laugh you know for you with this movie it was probably 50 stars right

yeah yeah i would i would i would i would have given it a hobby i gave brian the dude a bid i would you've used that one like nine times he says it a lot.

Well, he says it once, but they say it a lot.

I will agree.

Before I do another review, let's look at another great dude in history, and that is Jennifer Lawrence.

Okay.

I'm listening.

Despite this is, I hate to think of the Reverend writing this.

It bothers me.

Oh, the Reverend made these?

Yeah.

The guy we're looking at right now?

Oh, that's scarier than I thought.

I don't like him writing angelic yet down-to-earth actor.

Despite her endearing good looks and the undying affection of everyone on earth,

Lawrence hasn't let stardom warp her.

Deeply down-to-earth and often refreshingly casual, she's also an outspoken, big Lebowski fangirl.

She even played Maude in a high-profile public reading of the screenplay.

Uh-oh, so I would be careful.

This is why

he was actually there, but he was in the building next door with a scope.

Yeah, he says, like, I was in the vicinity and watched it, and she was very, very good and took a very interesting route to the airport as well.

Yeah, this guy.

I did not see that coming.

This guy is, it reads a little bit like, you know, down to earth.

And like, she's not like spoiled by Hollywood and stuff like that.

But then when you find out that she's just publicly voiced her support for the big Levowski, you realize it might not be a horny, stalker-ish thing.

It might just be the Henry Cavill thing, you know, with Warhammer.

I don't know.

You might be right about it being the Henry Cavill thing.

Here's one that ties our show in.

It is Jerry Garcia.

Ah, Jerry Garcia, the Grateful Dead.

Of course, Gavin, you were on.

It doesn't just tie the show in.

It ties the episode that Gavin was on, the Jamband episode.

It ties it together really good.

Oh, that that

very nice, very nice, Brian.

That would have hit so hard if we hadn't have done the tie the room together thing a bunch of times.

Imagine if that was the first one.

No, you know, so speaking of jam bands, jam bands, you know, um, do you know how a jam band uh knows they're that they're their the songs done?

Do you know how the jam band knows the song's done, Brian?

I don't know.

Oh, so actually, they have a hamster backstage on a wheel, and when it when it dies, the song's over.

That's just awful.

That's just awful.

That's awful in a way that I wasn't even expecting.

Yeah, so here's a actually, let's look at this one now.

Let's look at

a little bit of this video here because this is an important one, I think, for everybody listening that might be a dudist, especially you, Chris.

This could help.

I'm not a dudist, just to be clear.

I never, oh God, he's got a different look now, but it's equally scary.

screen.

He's got a green screen, I hope, because I hope he's not in a church.

And he's got a different dude.

Like, what are these, this wool, like, jacket or whatever?

He's looking like a character.

I know he's played Red Dead Redemption.

Yeah.

Yeah,

he's got the collar popped up.

You know what I'll say?

He might have just gained some weight, but it's too tight.

The dude would never have the jacket, the wool.

It's hanging off him.

This doesn't look so comfortable.

She was actually seeing a new girl, and she liked, she liked the big Lebowski, and they were actually going on pretty well for a couple.

That's great.

So

they're getting married.

Yeah, you'd think so, but then she did his laundry and she put his sweater in the dryer.

Yeah,

he actually had to violently end that relationship.

What the hell?

I think he had three sweaters.

Don't say he did it violently.

He just broke up with her.

All right, here we go.

Hello, dudes.

I'm the the reverend gary um sylvia and i'm here to tell you about the new totally not required wedding officiant course we are now offering so i think i don't know if it costs money because he's telling you about it as though this is a commercial so he will

well and that would mean he's got to be able to officiate your wedding as well well he can ordain you

But if he can ordain

you, then he must be ordained himself so he can officiate the wedding, right?

Because that's who I want when I'm, you know, when I'm tying the knot.

Listen, when I'm tying the knot with my sweetheart, I want him to be there.

I want him

with sunglasses on.

You can't, you gotta let the lady plan the wedding, all right?

Yeah,

if you like one of these guys plan the wedding, you can get Reverend Gary down there.

I promise you, Ariel will be very happy if I get Reverend Gary to officiate a wedding.

The big ordination kit is $35.

And I like this.

This is a cool move from Reverend Gary

that I have to show you.

So he marked out the $46

and then made it $35.

Oh, it's on sale.

That's sweet.

God, it's $46 down.

That's awesome.

It's like if I'm giving him my credit card info.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I I wouldn't.

I would use, I'd get a burner card or whatever, some sort of prepaid.

You can also get a $22 ordination kit or just, you can get the certificate for $10.

He's doing that.

What is the,

look at this big house he's in, though.

So I'm probably, he's probably.

You can get the dudas ID card for $15.

You could really go all out.

Just, you're like, hey, I'm, you know, I get the ID.

I get the, I, I can pull my ID out.

I can, you know, you can get a pendant for 15 bucks.

You can get the ordained dudis priest patch for five.

But wait a second.

I'm just trying to understand.

This is for a wedding.

You're not legally married, though.

You can legally marry people.

As a dude.

Yeah.

So

it's a real ordained minister.

Like it's a real thing, but then they're also just kind of tacking on this dude, this dude party.

Like this will be legal under

law.

Yes, yes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You got anybody in the United States, anybody can get ordained in anything.

Ryan, if, like, do you think, would you do like a, like, obviously you're already married, but it would be cool to kind of do a renewal of vows type situation.

Would you, if, if we could set that up, would you do a dude-themed

renewal with Reverend Gary officiating it?

I will, I will tell you this.

This is what I'll offer.

If you're getting married anytime soon, I will fly to you.

Okay, don't get ordained as a dudist minister, and I will marry you.

Okay, please don't.

Ariel listens to the podcast.

Now,

yeah, now the surprise is ruining you, but you do.

I am.

If you do that, Brian, I'll probably be at the wedding as well.

And I'm probably going to be in the bridal or the groom's men, and I'm going to wear the, and I'm going to wear a nihilist suit.

And regardless of what Chris says, I'm going to dress up like that.

I might dress up like Walter, but I am going to send you a sweater to wear.

Yeah, I would wear the sweater and everything.

I would use looking at it.

I will not be telling you guys if I do plan to get married.

Speech, speech, speech.

Yeah, I'll fly out there.

Yeah, so one thing I want to say about this.

I mean, if I did get married, I would hope you would fly out for it.

Yeah.

We'll all come out with the Lebowski thing.

This is like my, this is a preview of my speech at the at the wedding everyone was like speech speech speech and i'm gonna be like hey everyone you know uh i've known chris for some a long time you know

um

i can't i mean for him to get married you know it's

i let me just say before i tear up uh the dude abides

Everyone would be like, what the fuck, man?

Like, nobody would, like, everyone would be like, oh, it's like the people I know, like, my family, be like, is this your friend who's like in is this like New York-style comedy that he's doing?

Like, they wouldn't understand.

Let's see if we can get a little

understand.

I can send them to a little video that can explain dudeism to them.

No, Kevin, we have to play the video.

We're doing a podcast right now.

Okay, let's find out how this is done.

A mostly complete course to help you prepare for the modest charge put before you as a wedding officiant.

A course?

What?

Yo!

Okay, so he's out in the wilderness now.

The lighting's not great.

He's a bit washed out.

Thankfully, he has his glasses on.

But that was a tough, that was a

shocking cut.

He's holding a pickaxe.

He has an axe in his hand and he's in the middle of the forest.

Yeah, modest charge, but before you, as a wedding officiant.

A course?

What, like school with tests and stuff?

And dudeism?

Yeah, man.

Wait, he's in the course.

Now he's in a dude's style.

So it's not too exhausting.

It only takes a couple of hours.

Whoa, whoa.

But like, whoa, why?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

These people are like, okay, so hey, you want to get into this fucking thing where you just like laze around and do nothing?

Here's a fucking two-hour, you know,

course that you have to like.

It really isn't that long, of course, to become an ordained minister, but I don't think a lot of them want to do that.

Hi, man.

Because as more and more dudas are performing wedding ceremonies, this will be a good way to help equip yourself for navigating your way through the officiating process.

Can you pause it?

Sorry.

I was like, he's like, as more and more people are ordaining, do like, you know, I was like, is this happening?

But then he started talking in the future tense, and you realize that this is like a prediction that he's making.

This is something that's going to happen.

And as they start being so many of them, this will be the only way to differentiate.

Well, engaging dudas as officiants, a sense of well-being.

Knowing their dudas priest is nearly preparing.

Wait, Dudas Priest, Dudas Priest, Dudas Priest, Dudas Priest.

Hello, in the font logo right now.

Everybody, please get on it.

Make it Dudas Priest.

You think it's been done before?

Actually, well,

I did find a big Lebowski-themed wedding that happened at Chop's Bowling Alley in Omaha, Nebraska.

That's cool.

But it doesn't say on their offbeatwedding.com if they had a

Dudaism ordained minister.

So I don't know if it's official.

Yeah, you're saying they might not even be married in the Duda's verse.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Money.

To be clear.

There is nothing in dudism that says one has to take this course.

However, some some dudes may want to take it to sharpen their wedding-efficient game or just to have a few laughs and learn a little bit more about dudeism.

There are also some dudes who just like to carry certifications.

We're human.

For some reason, humans like having fancy pieces of paper to hang on their walls or an nifty ID in their pocket that they can win.

See, this is money for him.

This is actually his ID.

And

he's tricking them right now.

He's doing like, that's why the camera came really close there.

He's like trying to like hypnotize them.

He's like, some people like to have a little card in their pocket.

It's so important to them.

Yeah, not me because I'm kind of like chill, but like you said, for some people, they want a designation and it's something to put on their wall, which, of course, again, yeah, the dude would not want.

It's the exact opposite of what the dude would want.

You don't know what the dude would want.

You know, we all have our different,

you know, we all have our different

interpretations of our religion which is we're all dudest now well yeah i mean yeah i

i think i'm the most qualified dudist here and i so i think i'm the best to speak on it like i have the closest connection to the dudes you know what i mean like the dude i feel like sometimes i feel like the dude does sort of speak through me in a way if that makes sense i hope that doesn't sound crazy but it does it makes perfect sense i can't find the course on the site which is a bummer because i really like to know what, how much the course costs.

Oh, yeah, like how much the whole thing, and like how much they're trying to get out of people for this complete bullshit, you know?

It's 35 bucks

for the whole kit.

It's got one dudas priest ID card, one ordination certificate, one ordained dudas preach patch.

Oh, this guy's losing money on this, probably.

And he marked it down.

And he marked it down.

Yeah, that's actually fucked up because he's marked it down from 46, which is 46 is probably his break-even point.

He's just trying to like break even.

He's losing money on this.

11 bucks.

He doesn't need the money, though.

He has such a big library.

You can't go, you can go for free to the U Abides.

It's Abide University.

Oh, okay, that's for free.

They've had, yeah, and they've awarded 58,086 degrees.

I abide.

So just

like

it's a thing you just sign up for on a website or whatever?

Well, it does say this.

Some celebrities with an honorary doctorate, like an honorary PhD.

Yeah.

Meryl Streep, Ben Affleck, John Bon Jovi, Orlando.

And what does that have to do with?

Well, what do you mean?

Those are famous movie stars.

Yeah, yeah.

And

Oprah Winfrey, Ed Sheeran.

I think this is humor.

He said Ed Sheeran.

He did.

Well, I think these are people that they've honorary.

Like

they've given them, you know, this

thing without their...

I don't think they've asked for it, would be my guess.

Well, Chris, one thing I know that we'll be doing on the stream is watching

a dudist wedding.

Yeah.

That just is going to happen.

Let me one more time here, hit play on this thing and see, see what this, what this crazy guy, what this freaking crazy guy is saying

Wait, where's I'm on the right?

I can't find the fucking page.

Sorry about this.

Oh, here it is whip out and show off collecting certifications is a groovy pastime for some I'm still forklift certified, and I haven't even seen a forklift in over a half a decade.

Hey, shout out,

by the way, that's not how forklift certification works.

As somebody who has previously, I just mentioned I worked at warehouses.

I've been forklift certified.

It does not, it's not a lifetime certification.

You need to get that shit updated regularly to make sure that you're still safe to drive that forklift.

Nice try, buddy.

You might have a fucking piece of paper, but you ain't certified for shit no more, man.

Sometimes we do things just because it sounds fun and groovy.

And that's reason enough.

Stop saying groovy.

No.

Yeah, that's cool, but what's in it for me?

Oh, you're good.

He's got a rake.

He has a rake.

Is he doing yard work?

And the weird part about it is I guess he's meant to be playing different characters, but he's wearing the same stuff in all of them.

But he's doing yard work.

Like, his other character is a guy that does yard work.

Yeah, he's because he's not yet a dude.

So he still does stuff to help around the house.

If he fully converts, then you won't see him doing any more yard work.

He will become an absolute burden on everybody around him.

Yeah.

Yeah.

See, I like to watch those videos of like an overgrown like house in like Florida or something, and then a guy comes in and he and he clean and he just does it for the people who live there and they're all happy about it.

Those people who leave their house like that, they must be dudists.

Some of them might be dudists, some of them might be struggling with other issues as well.

Who knows?

But there's probably some dudists, probably.

I think every one of them is dudists, every overgrown house.

Oh, it's so big, it's growing by a second.

It's crazy how many there are.

After some reading and watching a few videos, you will have a solid understanding of what it takes to be a wedding solemnizer.

Well, also,

solemnizer.

Oh, I thought he said a wedding sodomizer.

That sounds like a good idea.

That's something I will not be doing.

That sounds horrific to go to a wedding and do that.

That sounds horrible.

I'm not doing that.

Yes,

I can go.

I will be there, but you know what?

I must.

You know what I do, though, right?

So

just sucking off.

Which is chill.

Did you say sucking off?

Why is it off a guy?

That's sucking off a guy.

That's not awesome.

That's awesome.

All right.

Well, fucking a guy in the ass.

You get a comprehensive lesson in wedding officiating.

After some reading and watching a few videos, you will have a solid understanding of what it takes to be a wedding solemnizer.

We'll also hook you up with a bunch of handy handouts, some checklists, and other materials to help you prepare for the big day.

Once you've completed the course, you can print out for purchase a certificate of completion to flaunt your status as a certified duda sweating efficient.

If you're into that sort of thing, how much is it?

Yeah, that sounds good.

I don't like seeing him with an axe.

Yeah, the axe is like it's the way he's holding it and stuff.

It's like he it seems very threatening kind of.

He doesn't seem like somebody who does yard work from the way he's holding it.

I don't know.

Like, my hope is that we see him splitting the along.

Well, he had no one to ask, I think, if the axe was in the shot or not.

So he was like, I probably got to hold it up pretty high because I am a one-man operation here.

Because he's holding it up.

He doesn't want to bother anyone with like his project.

So he's,

well,

it's kind of like he's like the politician or whatever who showed up at the thing for the photo op, you know, or like the owner guy who doesn't really know how to use

the damn duck hunting.

Gavin,

we're not going to end with politics uh that's how you appeal how much is it gonna cost me it's already the 10th and i got rent to whoa that's one of the best parts it's totally free man so behind

hang on his background now is from lord of the rings i think well it's it's the hobbit it's or the hobbit and i'm actually thinking that we're about to go on a little bit of a journey here i i've never had but it's not a 30 seconds left it's it's like

right over his shoulder is the hobbit and it's like it's a really close-up shot of the hobbit.

Well,

that's just your opinion, man.

That's

to help keep this course updated.

And we do have plans to expand it into a registry of dudus deficients at some point.

Oh, good.

You are also invited to purchase the certificate and or the ID.

You don't have to spend a dime, but if you have four or five dollars, maybe a bit more that you can spend.

we would appreciate any clams you can leave behind.

We have a monkey to feed too.

So, like, if this interests you, man, go ahead and check the description down below to learn more.

You think there's

all right.

Well,

sodomizing the monkey for five, four or five dollars, maybe more.

If you could,

I mean,

listen, whatever you think it's worth.

Hey, dude, we need to have dudaism recognized as an official religion here in Europe, but maybe that's just too much hassle, man.

Oh,

I don't know, bro.

The dude above.

aboard

yeah these are the comments underneath the youtube video uh what is that you know what would that what you know what would that what would that sound like you know dudeism in europe what would that sound like oh but

i will likely sign up later he's good with accents brian do you want to do like uh imagine the dude ism you've been doing a british accent a lot lately can you imagine the british dude and give us a taste of it oi mate the the dude aboards not bad It was an oi.

This person says I will likely sign up later, but I don't do weddings because I must get a business license and pay taxes on whatever I charge.

Besides, Social Security restricts my income until I'm 65, so it's not worth it.

Okay, you're not really getting the whole vibe of it.

Okay, okay, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian.

You do Chris's wedding and I'll fucking officiate his funeral.

Thank you.

Yeah.

What?

Yeah.

What if a dude is doing it?

Thanks for coming here, man.

Fuck it.

He's just bowling up in the heaven, man.

I'm going to put a J and let's put a J in the cat in the casket for him.

Oh, did you hit the switch?

You hit my voice changing your switch?

I'm going to put on the...

I'm going to put on the record here that if I die, we've been talking about this quite a bit lately too.

If I do die, I do not want.

any sort of a big Lebowski themed funeral.

Judas funeral.

And you're ready for your kid, Judas.

I think you're getting, I think you're going to get cremated and i'm gonna freaking roll you up in a blunt buddy you can't i'll throw you off the thing and then the wind will blow and get all over my

friend chris said he wanted to smoke him man

in

an inner tube with a cocktail and and you're raising your kid dudist right

no of course not yeah you are you'd actually sent me a photo of him and you said look at this little dude Well, yeah, that's a common term that you use to describe like a baby.

Yeah, okay, so maybe I use it every now and then get this get this brian he is in a sweater no i'm not even joking i'm not even joking i'm not even joking i went out with him yesterday he has like a full-on dude sweater that he is wearing like an actual actual goatee as well it's a pin on his first word was abide

i mean he hasn't said his first word yet he says that dada dada dada i abide and not to get political but i do not like abiden okay uh all right we're out of here Gavin, you got anything to plug?

Yeah, Gavin, got anything to plug?

Go listen to the, we were on Hollywood Handbook, and I noticed Gavin's on there as well.

Go listen to Gavin's episode of Hollywood Handbook from a long time ago.

That's my plug.

Yeah, I'm hanging around.

Just follow me on Instagram.

You know, watch my special from like last year or whatever.

Comment.

Oh, wow.

This guy's really trying to be cool.

I was Kevin Hart.

I've been Kevin Hart.

Oh, that's funny.

Oh, thanks.

I've been Kevin Hart.

Oh, that's funny.

That's funny.

All right.

We'll see you all next week.

Oh, thanks.

I'm Kevin Hart.

Stop it.

See you all next week.

I think next week is,

never mind.

It might be Hayes.

We don't know.

Yeah.

We don't know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We'll see you next week.

Goodbye.