Guys: Episode 102 - Hiking Guys With Libby Watson

Welcome to guys, the podcast about guys.

I'm Brian.

My co-host is Lazy Chris.

I think that's the only thing I come up with negative for hiking.

Lazy Chris?

Well, there's got, no, I think you didn't do good enough research.

I think there's got to be ways that you could sort of slag off somebody who's into hike.

Or, you know what I mean?

There's got to be some negative things like, I don't know, like a trail.

Mr.

Cars, right?

Yep.

Who drives a car?

Mr.

Cars.

Okay, that's not a that's not a bad.

I don't know why you yell.

Like

nature walk, Chris, because I feel like hiking guys kind of are disdainful of like, oh, well, it's just a flat nature walk.

It's for kids.

Yeah, I'd lovely.

Like, I'm a cat.

that's the casual version of it basically yeah i hate trails as you can hear our guest this week is libby watson and we're talking about hiking guys i couldn't do a funny voice at the beginning why because there's no funny hiking voice yeah well i think for a lot of them there isn't a funny voice have you been trying to do a funny voice for all of the

sometimes i do sometimes i do yeah game show voice once Yeah, I think sometimes it works, but I don't think, yeah, I think it's okay.

You know, some of them it's not going to, there's not going to be a funny voice.

I'll say this.

So, so my wife is very much into nature, as I've said on a show.

I'm not very

makes me love the disdain you have for it.

Yeah, the way he describes it is very like, oh, shit, you know, it's like, it's disgusting to you, right, Brian, in a way, or like you, I just don't like it.

I, it's the funny thing is, like, I hate the thought of it, but once I'm there, I'm like, ah, this is pretty nice, you know?

Yeah, I never get too out of like,

there's never a time where I'm like, oh my God, this is the greatest place I've ever been in my life.

I've never gotten like that.

It's interesting to me because I know you say that you, once you get there, you kind of have a good time or whatever, but I don't, I don't know.

So you're saying you don't complain a bunch when you're out there to your wife?

Dude, I complain everywhere I go.

But like, do you complain about sort of nature specific things, about how you don't have the things that you're used to having?

Like, are you complaining about nature when you're you're out there?

When I was out there at Mount Rainier, I got a little mad because this place was supposed to be open

at

three o'clock.

And then when I got there, they were like, we're closed for the season.

And I was like, oh, fuck this shit.

Why would you even have a restaurant?

You know?

Well, yeah.

I think they just operate during the time when there's enough people there to...

like sustain a business, right?

I think that they've probably sort of crunched the numbers on it or and they find that it's it's not actually profitable to stay open during certain times i'm telling you that listen i don't complain as much when we're in the city you know what i mean that's why all of my vacations are half and half right yeah so we go to a national park for three or four days and we go to the city for three or four days it's wonderful i think that's great that's a great way to do it because we like both as well like you know we like the the city the city part and the national park part and it kind of sucks also like if you go to one of those parks that's really far from anywhere decent that that can kind of be a bit of a bummer when you know that, like, the sort of captive audience that they have for restaurants, like when we went to Death Valley, you're 45 minutes from anything.

And so, the restaurant that's in the middle of the park is like they can do whatever the fuck they want because you cannot go anywhere.

And they know people are scared, anyways, already.

Yeah,

they're in Death Valley.

The name is kind of scary.

Yeah, well, it's good to know that's intimidating, yeah.

The key is to go to a place that has like a reputation with like jam band fans type of people you know what i mean like those no i don't i don't know what you mean please go on so if you go to like

i'm trying to think of a place like that we've been to like fairbanks alaska it's not a cool place you know what i mean

hey hey i want to apologize to the fairbanks listeners out there i know you didn't expect to catch that kind of stray here today and i apologize i think you have a lovely city i've been there myself and i liked it i went to i went to a hot springs play i've talked about this My wife was like, I got to see this Aurora Borealis.

And I was like, fine, what's the best chances of doing it?

Got us there at exactly the right time, got us on top of a mountain.

And got us on top of a mountain.

I mean, other people were involved in it.

You're taking a lot of credit here.

I feel like somebody took you up there.

Brian was supering the whole time.

Yeah.

I was.

I was telling the guy that was driving the tank type vehicle.

I'm like, hey, brother, I told you the story.

I wanted to leave early.

And they would, yeah,

they, and your wife didn't want to leave, right?

Yeah, but she knew I wanted to leave.

So it was kind of like it was her trip, but it was her trip, right?

It was like, she was the thing she wanted to do, right?

So

I think the weird, yeah, I would agree.

There's probably a weird tension.

It comes from like, you know, her being like, how did I find myself in this situation?

You know, she's been too nice is what was going on.

We should have been a little more cutthroat because I wanted to leave.

And then they were like, well, we can only take half the people down the mountain unless we unanimously vote to go down the mountain.

This is like an episode.

This is like a

sitcom episode of like a show, you know.

Um, it could, I feel like there could have been some hijinks.

There wasn't, though, right?

Just no.

So we voted, and then like five people were like, I don't want to, I don't want to go down.

It's two o'clock in the morning.

We're supposed to be here until four.

And I was like,

well, we'll be in the group going down for sure.

But you're not going to want to.

But my wife was like, well, let somebody else go that wants to go more than us.

And I was like, there is nobody up here that wants to go

more than I do.

Brian, I'm just going to toss this out here.

And I think probably people listening have already maybe come to this conclusion themselves.

But do you think maybe your wife wanted to stay?

And that's sort of what she was saying to you because she wanted to stay and actually watch the thing that she had traveled so far and dreamed of

looking at.

Did you get to see them?

Did you actually get to see the overall?

He wasn't impressed.

I wasn't impressed.

I was mostly on my phone, to tell you the truth.

He is mostly impressed.

It's in New York.

There was like a yurt where they had, well, I would say treats, but it was instant oatmeal.

Don't get into the, don't get him started.

He was very

treated.

Yeah, I know.

Listen, he's got a point about the, about the, but if we get him going on this, he's going to be real.

He doesn't really start.

He's really hated the food.

I was really pissed about this trip.

Yeah.

I was pissed off about the food because I spent more than one thousand dollars that's a lot of money to me

and especially at that time it was a lot more money to me at that time and i spent a thousand dollars for to go to this place

and one the restaurant food was disgusting like i i ate it once and then

i got some posts we have some posts um that we're gonna go through hiking hiking guys need advice

need advice this is from our hiking need advice preparing for our first 14er, but my wife refuses to carry anything.

Okay, what is that?

Is it a 14-day hike?

Is that what a 14-er is?

What are we talking about?

I believe it's 14,000 feet.

Oh,

14,000 feet.

That makes more sense.

A 14-day hike is so long.

It would be an insane amount of hiking to do.

So I don't even, I don't have any sort of...

I mean, it sounds very high, but like, I don't really have any context for it in my mind of how high that is.

Well, he goes hi everyone my wife and i love hiking and we're planning a trip to colorado soon where we're thinking of attempting our first 14er while we're not amateurs and have done hundreds of hikes together there's one issue my wife refuses to carry anything not even water she doesn't really hydrate and assumes everything will be fine no matter what I, on the other hand, like to be prepared and understand the potential dangers, especially at higher altitudes.

I'm worried about her lack of preparation that could lead to problems on a more challenging hike like a 14er.

Has anyone else dealt with this?

What can I do to help her understand the importance of being prepared?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I'm going to tell you right now, I'm the wife in this situation.

I think people might know, might figure this, but I don't like having anything in my hands when I'm walking.

It's the worst feeling in the world.

What about on your back?

What about a backpack?

Yeah, backpack.

Yeah, that's fine.

I don't know what you would put in it.

You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know what I would put in a backpack.

i mean i mean yeah i mean it sort of says it right in the post there you don't want water definitely that's a water yeah that's water is

you even maybe just you want like a camel pack or whatever you know is if you're going to be going on oh i hate those

but those are sort of nice because you don't have to they freeze up your hands and you can just sort of you ever try to clean one out it's disgusting and it's no no i it's not ideal no i understand

i have

to clean it that's a thing to do yeah that it's honestly if you're an outdoors hiking kind of person I mean, you want to clean it every now and then, but I don't think that regularly.

I want to get one of those straws.

You know what I'm talking about?

Where you can drink out of a lake?

Oh, a life straw.

Yes.

I have one of those.

Yes.

That I could carry because that could fit in your pocket.

And you could just go drink out of the lake.

You put it in the lake and just.

You need a lake, though.

That is the thing.

There's not lakes everywhere.

But if you, yeah, if you know that you're going to be going by a lake or you're hiking around a lake or whatever, yeah, that's just, I think, a sweet thing to have.

Stream.

Also, stream and stream.

Yeah, of course.

river,

creek, yes,

yep, creek, creek, yeah.

I'm the no, it's pond, pond, muddy pond, uh, muddy, muddy pond.

Right under the mud there and just get that lower level of water, the special water they keep at

the pond, swamp like mud.

There's water in that.

I hate to break it to you, but the reason it's mud and not dirt is because there's water in it.

So, that's right, that's right.

Well, I would say the there is like a big divide in the hiking community between between like hiking guys get really fucking pissed about unprepared hikers that they see, especially in Southern California, because we have some very big mountains that can get really dangerous in the winter.

And the hiking guys love posting about seeing like, oh, I saw a guy going up Baldy with, you know, sneakers and, you know, like one little bottle of water or whatever.

And it really, uh, it really sets them off.

Yeah, I, I feel like that, yeah, that is, it really, it's just like casuals, but in this case, it's like they really have the thing to hide where they can be like, you're, you're, you could die.

Like, this is dangerous.

It's like, it's not just like in the music community where it's like, you're new to this band.

You could die.

Well, I guess we did hardcore guys.

You could die at a hardcore show, but most shows you wouldn't necessarily die at.

But in this case, they're like, yeah, listen, you're ill-prepared and it could cost you your life.

So they really have this like, they can really kind of like moral superiority.

Exactly.

That's what I was looking for um yeah and i i also so so libby just to get it like how long have you been hiking like are you sounds like you're into hiking have you been where did you hike before you moved to california oh i'm a hiking guy yeah no i i would say i really started getting into it properly like when when we moved out here because around i used to live in dc and like to hike from dc you really have to drive at least the only thing hiking in in dc all they're doing is hiking up the damn tax taxes

as far as i'm concerned but i don't want to get into it honestly it's not a political podcast um yeah but there's a lot of good hiking where you are now i mean close to where you are not right where you are but

yeah well actually it's funny you say that because it kind of is i can i can hike from where i live up to the the griffith observatory and that's like a i've done that i've i've done that one before so that's hey cool hey you and i we've done a hike because we're la guys we're l exactly i tried to do it but there was nowhere to park oh my god oh my my God.

This guy's like never been to LA before.

Nowhere to park.

So I guess that I'll just leave.

Yeah.

If you did that in LA, you would literally never do anything.

It's the silliest thing I've ever heard.

There was no parking spots at the whole place.

It's really hard to park.

Yeah, but if you're an LA guy, you take an Uber to it.

I was going to.

Next time I will.

So this person, Snook Chaser, says skip it unless she agrees to be a team player.

I can't say I disagree with that.

Getting back to it, like punishing him, but it's not punishing.

It's like it seems like it might be difficult for him to do this on his own.

Like he needs somebody that is willing to, he can't take her stuff and his stuff, you know.

I just think it's really funny to get mad at your wife for not being a team player.

Yeah, well, this guy's great.

This next guy, Sun Monkey, goes, this is worse than not being a team player.

She's more like a saboteur.

Well, I don't know.

No, I think she's like, she's unwilling to do her part, but I don't think she's trying to, she just said, I don't think she likes it.

No, she doesn't, it doesn't sound like she doesn't sound like she likes it, and she's maybe doing it to humor you.

And she's saying, Listen, I'll do this fucking stupid shit where you walk up a mountain, but I'm not going to carry a bunch of crap.

Yeah, yeah, people aren't really against having stuff in their hands.

I am that person.

Like, I can't have a water bottle or less.

You don't have carrying it in your hands.

You don't carry it in your hands, right?

We keep trying to that's why Libby brought up the backpack before.

No, that's what what I'm saying.

I have a thing.

I have a thing.

It's called a backpack.

This is my water bottle, right?

You put that in the

side of your backpack.

I have a thing called the Stan Sport, which is a strap with a little thing on it.

I put the water bottle in there.

Yeah, for my urban walks, yes.

That thing's wonderful, and I use that.

Yeah.

But.

like

that saved me.

But if there's another thing

that I need, it's like, where am I going going to, what am I, then I put it in my wife's bag.

My wife always has a bag.

I just throw it in there.

My Ariel never has a bag, never carries a bag.

I have to take her stuff, you know?

Well, although, although she's recently, she got a purse finally, because I was like, what, what's going on?

You know, finally, I said, what's going on here?

You know, how are you?

How are you going out here totally bagless?

But I, I feel like most of the time I walk with my baby and then I use, I got that stroller, baby.

It's got a cup holder.

It's got shit put the groceries in it's fantastic well dark sky dad says holy hell saboteur my life coach caught me onto that word slash idea

oh that's cool

but that's cool though imagine you're like you're having one of your weekly life coach meetings and your life coach is teaching you about this very cool concept of saboteur and people sabotaging things and then all of a sudden you come online and you see that concept in front of you that's very cool you know yeah i'm always having that kind of stuff happen when I talk to my weekly life coach.

Well, my life coach, it's like, sometimes I wonder, like, is this guy tapped into some sort of like deeper plane or something?

Because I'll have these conversations with my life coach and then the next day I'll like really see signs from that conversation.

This next guy is great, yodeling veterinarian says, yeah, when my girlfriend and I go hiking, I carry like 80% of the shared gear slash weight, but that's just because I'm in better shape between the two of us.

And I'm totally willing to bite the bullet if it means going for a longer hike or it's more fun.

But carrying absolutely no gear yourself is honestly a huge safety risk.

Nice humble brag there.

I'm really strong.

I'm in better shape than my wife.

I can't argue with the facts.

He's, you know, the guy's strong.

He's buff.

I wish he posted a photograph of himself so we could see exactly what he's working with.

Oh, and the wife as well.

We need to see a pic of the wife.

Yeah, we would like to see a pick and the back and front because like to see the muscles and stuff.

But yeah, that is

this guy also like, he's, he's bragging, but he's just like, he is also sort of saying like, I'm willing to carry more

because I, I like doing this and I like doing it with her.

And I understand she's not going to carry more.

So I'm willing to do that.

So he's, he sounds like he's like, he's got the right idea.

He also just thinks he's a huge hunk, which is a different thing.

Next guy goes,

she doesn't get to go then.

That's fucking ridiculous of your wife.

So that guy just got mad.

Don't get mad at his wife.

He's not mad at his wife.

Do you know what I mean?

There's not a tone of it.

Like he's maybe saying that he's a little bit sort of frustrated at them, but he's not being aggressive towards his wife.

So please, sir, don't.

Yeah.

And then finally, the OP goes, she'd rather not do it than carry anything.

And Whack Bravo says, perfect.

Less worry for both of you then.

Yeah, it seems like it's a solved issue.

Also, I have to say, for like, for if you're hiking up a 14,000-foot mountain,

yeah, you need you need stuff, and you're really not going to get that far without your stuff anyway.

So, it sort of seems like a solved issue.

I don't think she's going to get like two-thirds of the way up, and then be like, damn, I wish I had some water.

Oh, they do that, though.

People do that.

I used to take one on hikes when she was like, you know, seven, eight years old, and she'd be like, I'm fucking tired.

And it's like, she's a child.

You got to not be tired here.

She's a little, you just said she's a literal young.

she's a child, of course.

Yeah, she had smaller legs, but she's no, no, not even that.

She just doesn't really understand.

Like, you have to have those experiences to like really, truly understand them.

And like,

I would, I, you want to go on a hike?

And she'd be like, yeah.

So then I do it.

And then but she doesn't maybe understand the like gravity.

She was eight and didn't know really what that meant.

She didn't really know what a hike was.

Like, she kind of knew what it was, but she didn't understand the legs.

My eight-year-old is a real saboteur, it turns out.

It's true.

On On our hiking, our user hiking problems asks a question that I've never even really thought of because I don't have this problem.

My pokey penis problem.

How do I minimize showing off my shrinkage while hiking?

Sorry, this is such a weird topic, but I don't know how else to address this.

But basically, as with cold water, sweating while hiking leads to shrinkage.

And the lightweight hiking pants I wear result in me showing off way more than I want to down there.

It's like a combination of all factors.

My penis isn't laying down, so to speak.

I'm sweating through my underwear and pants, and the pants are so thin to start with.

And all photos, it looks like the pants are stuck to my thighs, except for this small, pokey, conspicuously jutting out front.

What can be done about this?

I mean, why don't you just wear like, yeah, like...

tighter sort of boxer briefs that sort of compress it and you know what i mean it it's maybe not as comfortable but well he says i wear boxer briefs but maybe higher quality ones would help i think he's got a small penis but sounds like he's got a pokey penis.

It's kind of like he has a small pokey penis.

I think he might need specialty boxer briefs to deal with his small pokey penis.

Put a cutoff in.

Yeah.

I don't, I don't know what he's saying that it's not exactly sitting, laying down or what did he say?

It's pokey.

It's sticking out.

But is he getting a bit, is he getting, because that doesn't happen when you get a shrinkage.

It doesn't start poking up like that.

Yeah.

Is it maybe that the penis is so small that it doesn't even really hang?

You know, it doesn't have the length to hang.

I never even thought of that.

I think

the base and the front are at the same level.

Listen to how he ends this is great.

He goes, I wear boxer briefs, but maybe higher quality ones would help.

Am I alone in this?

How else do others deal with this?

This is probably only a problem for growers, not showers.

So he's admittedly saying this is, if you have a larger penis, this is not going to be an issue for you.

You're You're going to have the hangage required that it's just going to be the front of your, like, the, or like the like shaft parts going to be touching the

sort of traditionally, I feel like this is the domain of the larger penised person.

Because, you know, it's sort of like, oh, I can't even wear sweatpants without my huge dick being invisible to everybody.

Yeah, if it flops around or something.

Yeah, but this guy has managed to have the opposite problem.

It looks like I have a second Audi belly button.

Yeah, this guy, this guy

manages to have a penis that's so small that it's...

That's so funny because I was going to make that as a joke.

I was going to say he's got a little Audi belly button, but he does.

And that's fine.

And that's fine.

And that's fine to have.

Hey, I'm not trying to say anything bad about him.

I'm just saying don't go online and say, how do I solve my pokey penis problem?

Because other people are going to read that.

We're going to read it on a podcast, right?

Well, yeah.

He's a grower, though.

He's a grower.

So that's what he said.

But they all know how much,

yeah, it could grow by 800%.

Well, like, it's a it.

If him saying it's a grower, leads me to believe that he is not dealing with a full micro.

I hope, I'm hoping, you know what I mean?

Because it's like, if you're dealing with a full micro, and it's like, I don't really know how to deal with that.

I think you have to go on a different message board where they have those kind of things and they deal with them because they're, they seem like almost like too hard for the normal world to deal with.

The small penis message, but I got to go to small penis, penis, not small penis, Brian.

Not small penis, micro penis, and that is a real thing, right?

Like where someone has a real micro penis, and I think that those like exist in a different world, like when you're like 11 feet taller, like you know, like seven feet tall or whatever.

How like the world is just kind of different for you, you know.

I don't know.

There's gotta be, right?

There's gotta be, right?

Four skin penis, I would think this.

I would just think there is a chance that it might have existed and possibly got shut down due to trolling.

I'm not sure.

Yeah, it might happen.

I see Foreskin Piss Bomb replied and said, Levy, did you hear who replied?

Piss bomb?

Yeah, an expert.

Is that a puzzle?

He's building one.

He's taking his foreskin.

He's getting it circumcised and turning it into a piss bomb.

Yeah, the FBI is monitoring him currently.

He says, I see men recommend under armor bottoms for wiener containment containment all the time.

I think the slight compression keeps it flat and from showing the outline.

Now, my guess is that Foreskin Piss Bomb is not a hiker and was searching penis on Reddit.

Yeah, he was just looking outside.

He was like, Sometimes he goes on fact-finding missions outside of his Reddit, kind of like in a sci-fi movie, you know, like he goes out to find other people dealing with issues to bring them into the penis and piss Reddit.

Uh, Under Armor tend to be very tight and thick i prefer champion and nike is the next guy so uh somebody should advertise this

hey you're hiking is your pokey penis sticking out get this brand i'm gonna be

is your penis so small that you don't have the enough hang on it that you can keep the front of it from poking at the front well we got the special champion is for you yeah this guy says put your skinny jeans away oh

I think he said he was wearing hiking

hiking pants.

He said his pants in the post, I think.

So this one.

Yeah, next guy does have the answer.

Oh,

kilt.

I mean, a bad answer, and it's bad all around, but it would solve the problem.

I would never in my whole life wear a utili kilt.

But

I'm sorry, utili kilt?

Yeah, it's like a kilt, but it has like it's like utility kilts.

It's like a cargo.

I'll show you it because

you've seen it before, and they're the worst-looking thing in the world.

From the look on Libby's face, I'm not sure she has seen it before.

I'm blown away.

She will have seen it when she sees it.

Well, yes.

No,

stop it.

So this is.

I can't say I have seen this, but I have.

It's a $410 kilt.

Get off of this page.

Get off of this page, Brian.

How do you pick a sign?

Brian, get off of the page.

Ohio State Tartan kilt, Brian.

Yeah.

No, no, Brian, please.

Get off the page.

We got to get back to the post.

Good reviews.

You got to get back to the post here, Brian.

Every review is five stars.

I mean, yeah, I mean, there's probably afford not to have one, honestly.

That's how I feel.

I'll look into it when Chris isn't around.

Chris is around ruining everything.

All right.

Well, this is one that I think Libby is going to have opinions on as a hiker.

I don't actually, but I think we can all talk about this.

And this is from Psychedelic Cyclops.

And it says painted rocks on the trail.

This is the big moment.

This is, this is the defining argument of this episode because it is an incredible, this is an epic argument that happens, and we're going to have so much fun.

Okay, so those rocks that people paint and are quote hidden on trails for people to rehide with a Facebook page on the back of the rock telling you to let them know if they found their rock.

I'm very anal about leave no trace when outdoors.

Leaving trace.

You were saying the other day, you're quite anal as well.

Well, I am anal about certain things, you know what I mean?

Well, it was a different conversation we were having, I'm pretty sure.

But why were we having that conversation?

I don't know.

You were always having that conversation with me, and I try to stop it, but I just can't stop you from talking about it.

People are like, Brian's asking Chris for anal tips all the time.

He's asking me

for tips on anal.

No, you're just telling me stories.

I don't, I have no interest in hearing them.

You ever heard of pegging?

That's like kind of an anal thing.

Yes, I have heard of pegging because you fucking talk to me about it three times a week.

I only bring it up when it comes to action figures.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Peg warmers.

Okay.

I'm very anal about leave no trace when outdoors.

Leaving painted rocks goes against leave no trace practices.

I found two of the rocks while hiking in the Great Smoky Mountains last week, and I took them out and threw them away.

Oh, wow.

That's kind of cool.

That's kind of fucking cool.

And really, really like super crotchety old man.

Now, Libby, Libby, you're aware of this.

This thing that happened.

Oh, you've never heard of this?

I've never heard of this before either.

I don't know of this being a

you've seen it?

I've seen it because I've been to a ton of national parks over the last two years.

We've been going to like places like a Joshua Tree.

There's a lot of rocks there.

And what will happen is like somebody will paint a design on a rock and then on the back, it'll be like a Facebook group and then they can follow their rock on its journey.

You're supposed to grab it.

Wait, so you're supposed to take the rock with you?

Yeah.

And move it somewhere else.

Okay.

And then post the picture on the Facebook page.

It's like within the same park or to a new park?

Like

the Joshua Tree rock to Yosemite or I think you're allowed.

Yeah, I think that's what do you mean you're allowed?

You're fucking up.

Oh, I think that's allowed.

They want to see where the rock goes.

Right.

Like some fucking secret police descending upon you if you try to leave the park.

The park police, yeah, being like, hey, leave that rock where you found it.

Yeah.

Throwing a rock in the trash is a crazy thing to do.

It's already an insane thing to do.

It's such a funny thing to do.

It's a rock, yeah.

It doesn't go in the trash.

It's so good it's it's like makes the trash so heavy as well

i don't want to see them go hide them on a playground outside of the park or something i'm sure someone worked very hard on painting them but what do we do they think it's okay i looked up the facebook page from the rock and i was going to say something about it 7.1 000 members on it by the way but held my breath Guess I'll just keep throwing them away, but I kind of feel bad at the same time.

Coward, coward, fucking say something in the Facebook group, coward.

well there's going to be some suggestions oh god

oh my god yes

the reddit special

you should issue a cease and desist oh this is this guy may have videoed himself throwing the rocks in the trash i won't say that what do you have the videos i do i do oh yes oh my god sorry i've not been so excited in a while i might have just woke the baby up good lord

well you have to tell him sharing

screen now here's the gif

so just the way he's filming it and he's just holding them in his hand like in his open palm they're like flat rocks one has a mickey mouse one has a bird or a parrot on it and he just sort of lets them fall out of his head into a

big dumpster filled a dirty dumpster he's like inside this dirty dumpster Yeah, it's really nasty to look at, honestly.

It's really more of a tip than a throw.

This is a massive...

This guy is probably the worst guy to be around in the world, I would think.

I don't know.

This guy, he might be...

He might be really fucking cool.

I'm not sure.

Like to be around.

I mean, not cool, but like, you know, it might be really fun to be around a guy like this.

But yeah, it could go either way, I feel like.

They're not very good.

They're not very good, though, I want to say.

The paintings weren't.

Like the rocks were like, they they were just to be clear they weren't like some works of art they were something that would have been whipped up and done in by a child by a child in 25 to 30 minutes no yeah a child sitting down and doing a little artsy crafty project they weren't done by

you think they actually were done by a child why we don't know who did it oh i think they were done by adults i think adults have this idea not children um maybe maybe i'm wrong but i i feel like it's like disney adults who are doing it yes yeah the the mickey mouse is is a big tell on that front of what Cole.

The next person goes, I look down at the trail, the cut-removed trees, the stone steps added to the wild,

the occasional handrails and guide chains, etc.

And I can overlook a simple painted rock.

Leave no trace to me doesn't mean make sure humans never existed.

We're part of the world too, and that's okay.

Just don't let me catch you dumping trash.

You won't like me if you do that.

Oh, you won't like him when he's angry.

but a simple the oldest most frail man type thing

you won't you won't like me if you do that but a simple painted rock you're sharing your experience in the wild with a like-minded person that's a good thing

i mean this is a sort of philosophical question because he says i don't like trash but those rocks are trash now because they're in the trash so

At what point do they become trash?

Yeah, yeah.

And also, like, he said, oh, you're sharing it with like-minded people.

No, not unless you like Disney, because these were very clearly Disney-inspired rocks.

So, I mean, that, that's like a, you know, a big corporation.

You're putting it out in the wilderness.

I get it as a, you know, like a hiking person would be annoyed by that, but are, does it do any damage?

Do you know, I think that's the whole thing about it is like, is it, is it harmful to its environment?

You know, are the like paints or whatever, is it doing anything or is it doing no harm other than being slightly annoying in which case you should probably just just look away and keep walking, you know?

This person goes, my sister lives in one of these towns in Michigan that does painted rocks.

And

I love to walk with her and the kids and try to be the first one to find a rock.

We collect them and love the way it encourages more outdoor time away from screens.

Win-win.

And I've never seen trash on the trail, to be honest.

Not sure if it's a state park or city park, but either way, I still love them.

Good point.

Good point from him that it's like, hey, this is kind of a fun activity that, you know, could actually get people out in the wilderness.

It doesn't happen much nowadays, in my opinion.

It's like you go into the cities, and it's uh, sometimes you think you're watching uh, some type of a zombie film.

The kids are looking at their fucking phones, but yeah, so to get them out of well, that's why the Democrat run cities.

Oh, they're the worst for

and that's why the Republicans who run the great outdoors,

that's why the great outdoors is still, let's try to keep it still, you know, very not woke.

This person goes 100% the asshole, and then his next reply is a great Reddit reply.

I'm curious.

This is to the OP.

I'm curious.

If you saw some graffiti left by Native Americans, would you advocate removing it?

Oh, boy.

He's got them there, right?

Would marks left by a stagecoach caravan 150 years ago be removed?

The soot left in mammoth caves by early cave explorer lamps, remove them?

Or does leave no trace only apply to anyone who can read these words so well i don't know if we should i don't think we should compare the cave suit paintings to this mickey mouse no i think it's the same i think i think the mickey mouse rock is the same as a petroglyph

no it's a good listen he's got a really hey gotcha i love it i love it when on reddit when someone's just like got your ass and then it's like you can't really say anything now you're toast well then the next guy goes imagine being out on on a lovely hike and seeing a small painted rock that someone made to spread joy and thinking, I'm so mad about this rock.

I'm going to make a post on the internet about it.

I could just keep smiling and hiking and enjoying my life, but I was

forced to witness a rock.

that had paint on it.

And now my outdoor experience is ruined.

I realize I'm going to be downvoted into oblivion for this, but this sub is so packed with whiners, I'm surprised any of you actually have time to go out and enjoy nature.

Relax, breathe.

The rock is not a threat to you.

If you need so desperately to completely control the space around you, I do not recommend public spaces.

OP replies and goes, you really don't understand leave no trace, do you?

Oh, yeah.

Honestly, he's in trouble.

He's in the mud now.

This is not going the way that he thought it was going to go when he made his little video.

Well, now

he hasn't posted the video yet in the thread.

Yeah, so he posts this up and he's just like, I mean, let's get a little thread going about how much we all all hate these fucking rocks.

Let's get a little group hate going on these stupid fucking rocks.

And then everyone's just like, no, it's like not a big deal at all.

And now he's just like, he's spiraling because he's got nothing.

He's like, you just don't understand the thing I said.

Yeah.

And the next, this guy goes, you do understand that you'd leave much more of no trace by not hiking, right?

What you

oh, wait a second.

What if he didn't?

And if he didn't even exist.

What about that?

Oh, did you ever think about that?

What if you didn't exist?

What's your feelings on abortion?

You know, like just really getting into it with somebody.

What you see hiking in a national park is not nature in its natural form.

These landscapes have been heavily manipulated by humans.

You're leaving a trace every time you choose to walk on a trail.

OP responds and goes, they have been carefully planned and built out for us to enjoy them safely without going off trail to destroy anything else.

Yeah.

Unsafe rock practices can be very, very dangerous.

Well, you get distracted.

So Libby, imagine this.

You're walking right beside a cliff.

Yep.

And then all of a sudden you're paying attention, but then all of a sudden, out of the corner of your eye, you see a bright, you know, red rock.

I mean, you say this is, you think this is crazy.

I know a guy who broke his foot stepping in a hole because he looked at a van that had some weird painting on it.

So this is a good van.

This is something that can happen for sure.

So I feel like that's the danger, definitely.

Yeah.

You imagine that.

You look break your foot and then you fall off a cliff and you die.

That's, I can imagine that.

And now that I've imagined that, I'm very, very scared of these pairs of rocks.

And I'll just turn around if I see one.

I think.

I'm glad that you've never seen them because in my head, I picture it as like something that would happen around where you are.

I mean, it happened.

I've seen them.

I don't engage with them it feels like a california thing it feels like a very california it's a midwestern thing it is really okay i feel like yeah yeah yeah you think california people are above it they're like yeah yeah yeah they're above it okay that's like i think the further west you go this is serious the further west you go the more

like that they're able to they appreciate nature in like an untouched way Yeah, no, Brian, that's 100% true.

Like there is way more of a sort of like wilderness type approach where it's like, it's not just that we're going to like try and preserve the landscape, we're going to try and leave it untouched and unchanged.

And so, like, there are areas where they're really serious about like, you know,

you have to pack out like you can't even like poop in the ground.

Like,

you have to take it out with you or whatever.

Yeah.

And I live right.

far west as well.

I mean, I'm in like a very, I obviously, you know, live in a place where there's tons of that.

And it's the same here, where they really do have like a a lot of areas where they're really serious about preserving this beautiful nature that we have.

We really take a lot of pride in it in Vancouver.

Like, hey, this shit is like, listen, our city's all fucked and it costs way too much to live here.

And like, so we, wow, it better be fucking really beautiful and great, you know?

So it's like, they really hold on to that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, there are some people who don't even like it when other hikers will like stack little rocks to tell you which way you should go.

Like, because sometimes hikers will like leave a little stack of rocks to say like, like, this, you're on the trail or whatever.

Like, in California,

yeah, they hate that.

That, like, the trails are not really very well marked here a lot of the time, especially, you know, like once you get out of you know, like, even a little bit near the city or whatever.

Um, and so, yeah, there are some people who really, really hate that stuff.

I think stacking some rocks is fine.

Yeah, because, like,

it's just some fucking rocks.

What is the deal with the rocks?

Why are people so upset about rocks?

We got a lot of them.

Yeah, this guy goes, LOL.

Cut to me's fucking big garbage bag full of Libby's fucking stacked rocks, just dumping them into a dumpster.

You don't know how many times I read people saying I'd kick them over every time I see them.

It's such a fucking funny thing to do.

Yeah.

Like that's not even like, there's, that's not even like a nature.

That's not hurting nature.

Buddy, people stack some rock.

People are psychotic around here.

Like there's, there's like people who get mad at mountain bikers

or like, cause they say they destroy the trails and like the nature around or whatever.

They have specific trails and they'll go on and put up like these trip wires.

Like these weird like nature people will go put up trip wires to like, I mean, kill people.

They're like coming down a mountain.

Yeah.

And there's like shit like that going on.

So there's people who are pretty serious, which I do understand because we as human beings are also sort of actively destroying the planet and the nature around us.

So it is kind of cool that there's like people who are kind of psychotic and militant about it, you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah.

This guy says, I'm not saying.

So, the OP goes, This is a hill I'm willing to die on, I guess.

I don't go out into nature to see your kids' shitty artwork.

Um, and then a guy responds and goes, I'm not saying leave it there, or it's okay.

What I'm saying is, the rock isn't the problem, the art is.

So, remove the art, right?

So, is scrubbing the paint off too much work?

Oh man, just out on the trail with your fucking soap and

your toothbrush and like Marge and Lisa scrubbing the oil off the rocks or whatever.

Just

going up the mountain and scrubbing the rocks.

Yeah.

I would love to see a guy out there with acetone, like paint thinner.

This is way better.

Spelling your acetone everywhere.

This is way better.

Way better for the environment.

And finally,

sorry, officer, I apologize.

I know the fire's out of control now.

What I was trying to do was I was trying to scrub through paint off these rocks and I spilled it everywhere.

This guy goes, some person had fun painting a rock and placed it on the trail.

They're engaging with nature and trying to make some people smile.

But okay.

The ecological impact of the painted rock compared to, say, the city you departed from on your way to the trail is minimal.

The rock has offended you so much that it ruined your day.

I only wish my life was so carefree that a colored rock in the forest was enough to to ruin my day.

I think you need to gain some perspective.

But then we got a guy that's on the OP side.

Finally.

Finally, finally.

Well, maybe somebody had time to create another account.

That is very possible.

He goes, don't feel bad for cleaning up litter.

If these things were important to people, they would not be abandoning them illegally on public land.

No, no, no, no.

You say you don't understand the concept of it.

I don't understand the concept of asking.

Yeah, did you read about it or did you just hear, did you just hear rocks paint or

litter?

But maybe I should feel bad for supporting Leave No Trace since that means that seems to be a ban worthy behavior according to the mods.

I always forget how anti-

This is the same guy.

You think so?

I do.

I really, I really genuinely do think this is the same person, but yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then finally, the guy goes, I took a video of me throwing him away and was going to post it to the page.

And he gets a reply that says, please do this and be the hero we didn't know we needed.

And then the next guy goes, I want to see LOL.

And then he posts the video.

And

that set

several guys off in the, like they lost their fucking minds.

So I love this, though, when he's just like, he's like, fuck, man.

So he's basically spilling the beans here.

My whole plan was I make this post.

Everyone fucking cheers me on.

They pick me up like Rudy at the end of the movie and everything.

And then I fucking, they're like, you guys want to see something really fucking cool?

I filmed this shit.

And then everyone's like, no fucking way!

Dottie Dredd says, landfills are overflowing in this country.

Maybe you could recycle the stones.

Yeah, no, let's think about repurposing the stones.

I mean,

wait a second, like, you mean put them out into nature?

Like, because that's what rocks are meant to do.

How do you recycle a stone?

I'm pretty sure that's

a stone.

This guy goes, do you have any ideas?

How the paint isn't good for the environment?

And honestly, I don't want them.

And then he replies to himself and goes, why the down votes, lol?

I love that.

That's one of my favorite Reddit.

That's one of my favorite Reddits things is why the down vote?

I guess I'm going to get downvoted for saying the only sensible thing in this entire subreddit.

Speaking truth to power.

Yeah.

He goes, why the he goes, why the down votes, lol.

I don't want to see your creepy hand-painted Mickey Mouse in the middle of the woods.

And then he gets a little help from a guy that says Redditors are a sensitive lot and they just like lost their mind man like like it goes on and on and on in a way that like i i couldn't stop reading it because they they he is like he's everything that they hate and he's being so brazen you know he got a little bit of support and it like it emboldened him to like share the video of it and like then there's these people who already think he's such a piece of shit and now they probably think it is children right because it's like Mickey Mouse stuff now.

So that's like probably what they're thinking.

They're like, now I've seen the video and you're throwing away this kid's fucking painted rock.

Like, and yeah, they got their gone mob mentality about it.

Well, Barnaby Wood says, I found one in my local national park.

I contacted the person whose Facebook ID was on it and chewed her out.

I also carry

a little talking to

explain to her about a little concept known as leave no choice.

There's that movie that's very good, by the way.

Uh, I just keep thinking every time when they say that, I keep thinking of go check that out.

The movie Leave No Trace, very good movie.

Well, he goes, I found one in my, and yeah, he goes, I found one in my local national park.

I contacted the person whose Facebook ID was on shooter out.

I also carried out the rock and threw it into garbage.

And the OP responds and goes, Should I say something on the page of these rocks I found?

Probably you threw it into trash.

And then a guy goes page for my rock is a is a really really sad concept i know i do have a to have a you think that like

yeah it's like listen you can mock them for it and i think they're worthy of it but it's like more of a sad thing and it's like almost like it makes it even worse what they're doing because it's like it seems like it's like this really meaningful thing to people who don't really have a lot of meaning in their life for whatever reason and

you're just taking it away from them for nothing.

He's somehow punching down with this.

The guy who threw the rocks in the trash is managing to punch down.

Yes.

Finally, a guy goes, you sound super fun to hang out with.

And then I choose Jif says, I know, right?

Like anyone is the boss.

This thread makes me ashamed of my race.

My race?

Anybody?

He means human race, right?

Not like white people.

I think he means white people, but also maybe human race.

I hope he means human race.

I guess because nobody, there was, there was no, I mean, listen, it's probably, it's probably white people, but we don't.

It was a white guy.

The guy throwing it away was a white guy.

Yeah, he was a white guy.

You know, probably

it maybe, but you know, we don't know.

We only know that the one guy was, but maybe that's fair then, because maybe he's saying, I'm ashamed of this guy.

He's a white guy and I'm ashamed of him.

What about this?

Oh, this thread just gave me a new hobby.

If it's going to upset people this bad, goddamn, can't wait to put a rock outside and see a grown man cry.

Oh, fuck.

So now triggering the rock libs.

It's all about triggering the rock libs now, everyone.

Let's start a movement, you know.

And then he gets a guy that responds to that.

He goes, just what the world needs more of complete fucking morons.

And then the OP is like, disagree, we need smarter people.

The OP goes, LOL, go ahead.

I'm just going to throw them away.

Oh, shit.

Yeah.

Hey, buddy, you can't make them fast enough as I can tore them out.

All right.

I got a fucking dumpster down by my house.

I love this.

I love the idea.

I've come around to think of that's funny, actually.

Yeah,

turning it into like a war now between these people where they're like, they're like, and then all of a sudden the rocks start like...

they start getting really menacing with their messaging on them and stuff like that.

You know what I mean?

A rock with a gun on it?

Yeah, like

a bullet with the address of the person who's been throwing them away.

Like some real, like, like heavy-duty mafia shit.

I mean, Brian, Brian, yeah.

I was going to know, I've never, I tried to start a mafia.

It didn't happen, but had to settle for jumping old ladies outside the grocery store.

I never jumped an old lady in my life.

That's an older man, older man.

The oldest person

was somebody's dad that was probably in his 30s or 40s.

He wasn't like

70-year-old.

Washed, yeah.

He was washed.

He was washed.

And he didn't stand a chance against the numbers you guys had anyways.

Didn't matter if he was in his peak physical condition with the numbers you guys brought to a fight.

That's fair.

There were probably five, six, seven, eight, maybe 10 or 11 of them.

Yeah, it gets higher every time he says that.

Only really, porno sean could have done it by himself.

Porno Sean, one of the best fist fighters.

He's tough.

He is tough.

I saw him.

I don't know if he still is.

I think he's got a family now.

I'll bet you fucking money.

I could almost bet that he's been in a fight in the past five years.

Well, that's okay.

I thought you were going to say like five weeks or something.

Yeah.

No, for five years, he's 40 years old.

Yeah, that's true.

I have not been in a fight in the last five years.

Exactly.

Poor no.

He stays very fit from jerking off so much.

That's good exercise if you do it enough.

Oh, he's got, yeah, he's got tom arm.

Giving him severe tom arm.

You said you had.

You had tried to explain this to me in messages that there is a guy that does, I guess you said, like, he's the ultralight guy.

Okay, so I have two guys here.

Yes.

Let's talk about my, my second guy first.

My second guy is a guy who posts on the, I read the Southern California hiking subreddit a lot to, you know, like find trails and stuff.

And is that all you read it for?

Or do you ever, is it a little bit, are you looking for a little gossip maybe?

Or like, is there anything else there?

A guy throwing a rock away?

I'm sometimes making a bag of popcorn and settling in, looking for some fights about crash and rocks and stuff

um now unfortunately the post was removed but uh he did he caught my eye when he posted something on the southern california subreddit

and the the title of the post was the naked menes

and i googled menes and it's like I guess an ancient pharaoh or something.

And it's just like a shirtless pic of him and then like his out the outline of his body.

So I was like, what's this guy about?

So I click through to his profile

and i find that he has two interests one of them is hiking

and the other one is swinging ah

he's the guy all he posts about is swinging and hiking it makes sense i looked into that it makes sense to me i'm sure you did it makes no no no that's not what i meant i i i searched both hot wife and swingers on the hiking thing and then i searched hiking on the hot wife and swingers message they're just

most of it was just like,

Hey, do you think there's some people hiking that would want to

like, how do you guys find people on the hiking trail that want to suck and fuck?

And it's like, Yeah, you gotta, you gotta probably figure it out beforehand.

I would imagine.

I don't know that there's a lot of, yeah, I mean, just some area where you can, it's not where I'm going to pick up chicks, I guess.

Or, like, not where you're going,

like, you and your, like, if you're a swinger, right?

And you're with, there's, you can't just go places and be like, I'm going to find a couple to do swinging with me.

You got to do that at the clubs.

But I know they're overrun by single guys, but that's, you're just going to have to go to the clubs because that's you have to go.

I mean, the smell is difficult to deal with.

They all smell disgusting, single guys.

They all have a uniquely disgusting smell.

And, but you have to, that's part of what it is.

If you want to become a swinger or a bull,

you know, oof, god, can you imagine, Brian?

Yeah, I mean, it's hard to, it's hard to grow up in that world, you know, but

it's so good.

It makes a lot of sense, though, in that, like, it's a thing you can do that you can stay overnight and you're prop, you can not, you can situate yourself in a place where there's not a lot of people.

You know what I mean?

I think the thing that I've seen more of and just

my general general subreddit page when I go to like prep, yeah, like Patreon shows and stuff is that nudists

do a ton of hiking.

Yeah, that makes sense.

That makes naturalists like naturalists.

I want to be out in nature.

That makes sense, right?

Yes, exactly.

I just shared a link in the chat.

So, this same guy whose posts are entirely about hiking or swinging also posted on the trail running subreddit, and he just posted a pic of his pants.

And it says the title is Naked Hiking.

And the the question is: Do you ever run or hike naked?

Um,

and that would be

running, I don't know about running.

I mean, maybe that might be a thing for that guy with the little tiny little poke.

I think he would be okay because he's not, he's not getting too much uh momentum on that thing, you know?

Yeah, but I would just think that there's a reason why you got when you're running as a man, you have to have underwear on, yes, no,

you don't think so, Brian.

I don't know that you want, I don't know that you want to say that, Brian.

Why?

Okay.

All right.

It's all good.

Why do you have to run?

If you are going to go in the woods and your choice is to be naked, I think, you know, cavemen were

running all the time.

But it just flops around a lot, Brian.

Like your balls and your dick would flop around a lot.

It could become painful, actually, because

your dick could hit your balls, your balls could hit up underneath, and that it's like getting sacked, and it could hurt.

But

guys run without underwear.

Exactly.

The underwear is the sports bra of the person.

But there's no naked running, huh?

Well, this guy does.

And I can tell, I do want to read some of his comments because they are really funny.

Obviously, the response on the Trail Running Subreddit, probably not what he was hoping for.

Some pretty upset people.

Somebody says, why?

Like, seriously, why?

Not because it feels good.

Why would you subject fellow hikers to your dangling participle?

Little funny Reddit guy joke there.

I guess

sunburnts, bug bites, rashes from brushing against weeds, indecent exposure charges, making fellow hikers uncomfortable.

Shall I go on with the reasons not to do this?

And the OP responds, I'm always serious.

It does feel good.

Why do I need to make other hikers slash runners feel comfortable?

I'm always serious.

It's so, such a funny thing to say.

I'm trying to find

because you bring that up and like people are like, why would you, why would you do this?

And I, when I was researching the naked guys episode, yes.

Uh,

I, I, you know, obviously you're just going to see a ton of pictures of naked people doing different

things.

And one of the ones that kind of blew my fucking mind.

Ah, I don't have it.

One, I was going to see if I had it.

One of the ones that blew my fucking mind was a guy.

He was wearing like rain boots,

but that was it

and he was outside weed whacking like he was doing lawn work and the only clothes he had on was big rubber boots and i was like it's high risk high risk nudism it's like a different thing it's like you're into nudity but you're also kind of into like extreme sports and shit like that and danger and like because that seems like it would be really scary to do i want to clarify as well by the way that i my fridge uh was open it was beeping and and I had to go close it.

Um, I didn't hear Libby's, I didn't, just in case you're like, oh, Chris didn't react to that at all.

Like, what I literally wasn't here.

I just want to clarify.

He opened his refrigerator so he could get up and leave.

No, I want to hear the thing about the naked hiking guy because it is actually

guy.

So, yeah, Chris, Chris has gone to a nude beach and he has been naked on a beach, Libby.

Oh, did you run?

Did you run on the beach?

No, I didn't.

I didn't, I didn't.

I wasn't just full paywatch running down the

that's part of the thing.

I have to assume the only thing I learned on the naked guys episode, one of the only things I really learned on that episode was like part of it is doing things

that people do with clothes on naked, like that, that like it's like we can do all the stuff we want to do.

We need clothes.

The concept of it is like the clothes are not necessary.

We can live this natural life.

And the closest you can get to that, the better.

So you, you know, sometimes, which I don't agree with, but they'll drive around naked, you know, which I think is not cool because you could have a big high car, like a raised up truck or something comes up beside you or whatever.

It has to look at all your bits and stuff.

I think it's still a bit rude in our system.

I mean, you're not supposed to be looking and.

But if you glance over, say you glance over and then a person's nasty bits are all up in there.

You know what I mean?

I mean, what?

I wouldn't care personally, but I think some people would.

I would think it's the funniest thing in the world me too i would i would i would absolutely love it it would be the best thing ever to me but i still

like society i think that we're not like people don't think that's great you know i once saw a naked guy running um really

yeah yeah yeah he it was weird right so like

i was walking on a trail that I walk on all the time.

It's not like a trail trail.

It's it's concrete.

It's in the middle of the city, it's a

park that it's called the Sayota Mile.

It's just a trail that can get not a trail, it's a side,

yeah, it's like a it can get there's no cars or anything on it, but and people ride their bikes, but it can get you from yes, that's perfect, it can get you from one side of downtown to the other.

So, I walk that all the time because I'm you know always doing a circle.

And one day, there, there's a river,

and then you know how how at the front of the river there's the they leave the weeds like they they don't cut the they don't cut it they don't take care of it they they kind of leave the weeds i think it's some kind of environmental thing i don't know uh it's like protected they mow all the grass close to it but not there and one day a naked guy just popped out of the weeds and then he ran and then popped back into the weeds and i didn't see him again

and i was like that's weird that's like a wild wild animal almost.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, that's like how an animal behaves.

It's kind of like comes out of the bush momentarily and then disappears again.

But there wasn't another person

because that I thought this was a guy that lost a bet.

And it was like three o'clock in the afternoon.

So people are at work, but you know, they're in their buildings working.

So I saw him do it.

And like, I came home and I told my wife, it was the best moment of my entire week that week.

I was just like, if somebody said at the end of the week, oh, what'd you do this week?

I'd be like, I saw a naked guy running, running on the side of a mile.

Like, that was so funny to see.

I think he lost a bet.

Why?

I don't know if I don't know why you would think that.

Why was he in the

weeds?

To me, I feel like he lost a bet.

Here's what I thought.

I figure in my mind, he lost a bet, and he was supposed to run on the sidewalk naked.

He's supposed to run a certain but he was too scared

to do that so he jumped out of the we he put his clothes in the weeds

he ran and he saw me he ran into the weeds and then when i walked by he he ran out of the weeds and came back and got his clothes okay so

You would know better than us then.

He didn't seem like disheveled or like

under the influence of anything.

I gotta tell you, it seems impossible to be disheveled when you're naked.

Like, what is disheveled?

Long hair, unkempt.

I mean, regular hair.

Just the idea.

You're right.

You're right.

It is hard to be disheveled.

That's one of the bonuses of being a nudist.

People can't call you disheveled.

Yeah, yeah, that is.

But yeah, that's so.

I guess with the content, like you actually seeing it, like to me, if I saw a naked guy jump out of the woods and then jump back in the woods, I wouldn't think there was a wager involved or anything.

It wouldn't be my first thought.

It wouldn't be the first thought.

I can't put myself in his mind.

I can't think of another reason.

Well, like, I guess, just I think sometimes people, if they're under the influence of drugs or if they're like having an episode or something, oftentimes they'll feel really hot or itchy or something like that, or they'll want to get their clothes off.

That things like that can happen, you know.

But as what Libby's saying, I think that like

hiking

when I was in Mount Rainier,

people would like within the park, right?

People would just pull off the road and walk into the woods.

It wasn't the thing that's different about a lot of the national parks is, as compared to state parks, metro parks, is that you can get, you don't have to go on the trail generally.

They will let you go out into the woods and do whatever you want to do out into the woods.

I don't know what you mean by that.

Exactly.

You can just park your car on the side of the the road.

Well, you can do whatever you want.

Yeah, that's true,

but that's true of all the areas.

You're allowed to go ahead.

But no, you're not.

I mean, in a lot of places, there are specific signs that say do not leave the trail.

When you're at a national park, it's not against the rules to just stop your car and walk out into the woods.

Oh, because it's a public space.

So maybe you're on a trail and only the, it's just weird because I just think.

I don't know.

I think you can pretty much go walk around.

It's just a matter of whether or not you're able to do it and traverse the area, you know.

Right,

that's why trails are good is because someone's already cut all the bushes away.

But if you have, like, if you have tools, then you can, yeah, yeah.

I can't really think of anything I would want to do naked less than hiking, like, even putting aside all the shame and stuff.

It's like you are either going to get sunburned or you're going to be cold.

There's like dust and

fucking

bushes, and yeah, poison ivy, poison oaks, all kinds of stuff.

Uh, I have not seen anyone hiking naked here, but I do see a lot of barefoot hiking.

That's that's just people being silly billies, though.

It's like, again, I'm like, I'm really grateful for my fucking shoes when I'm

hiking.

There's a lot of sharp rocks, there's a lot of stuff on the ground.

You know, sometimes there's bare shit.

It's funny you brought this up, Libby, because you told me a few things in the message that kind of put me on the trail of things I should search for.

Oh, that's a cool way to say it.

On the trail.

Oh, I didn't even think about that.

Thank you.

Oh my God.

That was just an accident.

And I got here.

This is a post from Synfili Sinatra.

I hate Frank Sinatra, by the way.

Oh, that's because you don't think he's as good as the number one crooner, Seth Mack.

Seth McFarlane, he's the top dog.

Yeah.

But I mean, this is something that you had told me about a little bit.

And I just want to read this.

He goes, lesson learned.

Never store toilet paper in the same same pocket you keep your pepper spray.

Especially don't do this.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is not a, is this on R slash common sense?

Well, I don't think, I will say I understand how something like this could happen.

Okay.

He goes, especially don't do the, do this if it's old expired spray that is likely to leak all over your toilet paper.

So you wouldn't think it would happen.

That is, you know what i mean like why would it why would it be a risk yeah

i had to cut the hike short and waddle to my car feeling as though i'd sat on a heated car seat that was turned up way too high i suspect i would have been in a lot more pain if the pepper spray was not expired as painful as it is as it was i couldn't help but laugh at myself but and the reason for for guys like us though that's nothing when we're like i'm eating fucking 575 000 scoville fucking hot sauce for dinner and i'll tell you what that's how my ass is all the time.

So it wouldn't matter to me.

I get that shit out.

Yeah.

I will say that

I have gotten like pepper stuff on my wiener.

And every time.

I think it happened just from like touching like

hot sauce type food or.

Yeah, and I had to go pee.

I was cutting.

I use when I make chili, everybody, I use actual chilies.

I don't buy these fucking canned chilies.

I buy actual chilies and I roast.

Are you like one of these?

You're one of these guys that like does one authentic thing and

like one single thing and you just harp on it all the time everything else is just store brand

well see i get made fun of for being a pizza guy and a grill guy yeah and then now you got made fun of because you said your favorite food was pizza and hamburgers it's not a joke yeah i know it's not that's why it's funny

brian is those are my two favorite foods as well thank you libby because they're the best foods and they're really good.

I could eat pizza every day, no problem.

I think, yeah, I think, I don't think, I'll be honest with you in the context of it, Libby, I think you would have had a better answer.

You would have understood what we were looking for and you would have said something.

Like,

3D episode, I guess.

It was the whole, the whole idea was like, of course, everyone loves hamburgers and pizza.

You know what I mean?

Like, it's just, they can't be your favorite foods, you know?

You got to have something a little unique.

No, they can be your favorite foods.

No, they can't.

If you like them the most, they can be your favorite food.

They're not allowed to be, Libby.

We're not,

we actually made Brian pick a new favorite food and it's, I think, cashew chicken.

He came up with that.

That's not true.

I don't even know what cashew chicken is.

Okay, so there's a little bit.

We're still sort of working.

We're still working some stuff out.

Yeah.

Things with it, but he has agreed to have one.

Okay, what is it?

Candy.

Yes, this is what he keeps negotiating with.

And I'm telling you, these are not serious negotiations, Brian.

We're not going to find a middle between cashew chicken and candy.

Candy chicken?

Ooh.

No, once he tastes it, once he tastes it, he'll realize it's not what he wanted.

It's not what he wanted.

Yeah.

I like a good smoked brisket.

Is that okay?

Yes.

That's a really

I love a smoked brisket as well.

I will say I can agree with you on that.

Like, as far as barbecue, that's my go-to every time if I'm getting barbecue.

Yeah.

I have a face.

I have a favorite.

You said, talk about, again, I have a favorite brand of pepperoni.

Like,

that's not, that's not, why did you say that?

Like, it was such a prank.

Yeah, and like, why did you say it?

Like, this is like showing people that you're good or something.

I just, I'm letting people know that, like, I have a discerning palette

and I have a brand of pepperoni that is like, I always have it on hand.

It's the good stuff.

And, like,

you know, I don't just go to the store and buy Hormel pepperoni.

So you get like, you get it from a deli, like, uh, or is it packed?

I have to go to a special store.

It is a store called Littleton's.

Is they sell like gourmet stuff, like caviar and stuff.

I actually recently had caviar chips there.

It was

or fries, not chips.

I don't know why he called them chips.

But Libby's.

He does this all the time.

It's really uncomfortable.

I was curious about the other guy, too, because is he the ultra?

I'm curious about the ultralight.

I'm so glad you asked.

Okay, so I don't know if this guy, okay, so this guy doesn't exactly count as an ultralight guy.

There are, like, I highly recommend if you want to spend a fun afternoon, go on the ultralight subreddit and just what's ultralight?

What's ultralight?

Oh, it's people who like try really hard to minimize the weight of their backpack to the point where they will be literally like they will be just eating olive oil for breakfast because it's very calorie dense for its weight and so they'll like compare they'll be like oh this this brand of uh this brand of like water bottle weighs uh 86 grams less than the other one so oh they're talking in grams and they're really

yeah ounces are nowhere near accurate enough is there a is there like a is there somebody who's considered the

the top dog somebody who got it the lightest well i don't know but there is a guy who i think is not exactly ultralight but he posts on the SoCal hiking subreddit every now and then.

And he,

like the ultralight guys, has an unbelievable amount of data.

I'm going to send you the link here.

He records all the data he possibly can about his hikes, including not just the distance and the elevation gain, his heart rate, his pace, how much water he carried, how much food he had, which is always an insanely low amount.

Like, for example, here, he did one of the hardest hikes in the United States, the Cactus to Clouds hike, which goes from Palm Springs to the top of Mount San Jacinto, about 10,500 feet.

He ate 200 grams of trail mix the entire time, which

that's what I would eat sitting at the Smarty.

Did it have the Smarties in it?

You know, he didn't say.

God, I only like

if it's got the Smarties.

Oh, what do you guys call them?

We just have MMs in our trails.

Smarties are chocolate.

Oh, sorry.

Yeah, we put Smarties in them, but they're MMs here.

Yeah, yeah.

We don't.

We, I don't eat Trail Mix at all.

I love Trail Mix.

I hate raisins is my problem with Trail Mix, but uh, what I used to do because I used to, I used to do a lot of my brothers are huge into outdoors and hiking, and I've done some with them.

And I used to do it a lot when I was younger, and so I would have Trail Mix, but I would have to pick out the rate, like I would just get the, but I loved the fucking peanuts and the, you know, the little what else is in Trail Mix?

Any kind of nuts in there, I love seeds,

I love some sunflower seeds, but yeah, what's some classic Trail Mix stuff, Brian?

Uh, beef

That's a classic Trail Mix thing, right there.

I mean, it's a classic thing that Trail Mix makes you do.

Excuse me, it comes over the fiber.

Yeah, what about this?

Beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Ultralight, ultralight would never be.

They would never bring a beer.

What a waste.

I saw marijuana, marijuana, marijuana, dried marijuana, dried marijuana, folks.

We're talking ultralight.

No, ultralight would probably use a vape pen, right?

Oh, well, vape pen might be a joint.

A rolled joint with some flour is lighter than a vape pen.

I want to say living in the middle of the day.

This is about 724 grams lighter.

This guy did get Brian level

steps, but not in a Brian level amount of time.

Like

I get 50,684 steps.

all the time during the summer.

Like in one day.

In one day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

One day.

Do you get them while climbing a mountain, though?

Because that's what they're doing.

No.

I don't.

When I finish my walks, it'll be like you walked 23 miles and climbed one and a half flights.

Yeah.

Yeah, you're straight the whole time.

You're just walking it.

Yeah.

It's like you can't, you just can't do that here.

It's too hilly.

But I want to say that the

metric that really sets this guy apart is that he measures his weight loss, his fluids in, and his fluids out.

Oh, piss measurements.

Yes.

That weight is insane.

Yes, right.

Well, this is an insanely hard hike.

He did it in August, which is something that you absolutely should not do.

People die doing this hike.

You start in the desert where it's 110 degrees, and then you have to carry enough stuff so that you're warm at the top of a fucking mountain where it might be 60, and then you have to get back down.

It's fucking crazy.

Anyway,

I did wonder.

He posted in this post, he has a lot of these like horrible selfies.

I really don't know how much.

I'm really sorry.

I don't know how much 60 is.

I'm sorry.

Oh, that's like um that's like a nice spring day oh okay no it's yeah okay like i'm trying to figure it out because i don't we don't have that measurement i wish i learned them but i'm sorry i apologize 14 maybe okay okay cool and 110 is like that's like 40 in celsius i got you yeah yeah um he did say uh

he did say that he measured his fluid out with a beaker

so he was pissing into a beaker while he was on the mountain so that's kind of cool.

He's like going science mode a little bit.

Yeah, yeah.

The best thing about this is like he writes this really long

trail report and is like, yeah, measuring his piss and stuff in order to come to the conclusion that it is really hard to do one of the hardest hikes in the United States in the middle of August.

Yeah, he looks like he like this, these, these selfies he took are, I'm gonna, I'm gonna get one up on the screen.

They're wild.

He, he looks, I don't know how he's measuring his sweat, by the way.

Is he like ringing out?

There's no way that he's really doing that.

Yeah.

Is he ringing out a shirt?

He's got an equation.

Oh, yeah, of course.

What is that?

He's got a sweat measurement equation.

Yeah, I don't know.

I don't understand it.

It seems like he would

minus SW minus P plus T.

I would never know, actually.

I am very stupid when it comes to equation.

I don't know that that's, that's, that might be one he invented as well.

I'm not sure.

No, he's not giving us a key there to what these are.

Yeah.

So I don't, I don't know.

I love this line.

After nearly 13 hours and death stalking me for most of that, I made it to the peak.

Yes.

And so

this guy, I mean, hey, if you like almost dying, that's a thing that people want to do.

Yeah, people do it a lot.

Like they go like cliff jumping and stuff like that, or like, you know, climbing, climbing, rock climbing in crazy places.

This just seems like kind of a weird way because it's like, I want to slowly die.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Like that seems somewhat even scarier and more intimidating to me, you know?

I prefer to do that with drugs.

Yeah, I guess.

That's much easier.

There's so many opportunities in places like this.

Like Joshua Tree is right there.

You can just, you know, take some acid and go to Joshua Tree.

People do that all the time.

Seems a much, much nicer experience than eating 200 grams of trail mix over a 12-hour period and climbing 10,000 feet we don't know what was in the trail mix granted but it could have been that's true very good but and it could have been mushrooms magic yeah yeah yeah i really like that um he says i really hope that this can serve as both an objective analysis and a subjective suffer fist of what it took to survive a very risky hike like he's so clearly he's so proud that he survived and did this thing and he's sort of framing it as like don't do what i did but by the way what i did was so cool oh yeah yeah yeah i love guys like that yeah honestly if they made a movie i they'd have to get mark wahlberg to play me in this movie because this is a crazy shit you would be like if you were in the movie you'd be like in the beginning and you'd be like some guy like fucking what's that guy bobby moinahan or something at the one of my friend at the beginning you're you just can't do

so

Before we go,

I have to read some reviews because I love reviews.

This is an Amazon review.

I'm going to share a picture with you guys.

I'll make this the picture of

the episode.

What kind of gear do you usually?

Because

I live in Vancouver where we like gear no matter what.

Even if you don't hike, we got the gear.

So, what are you rocking?

Oh, I've got a backpack with a, I've got a Gregory backpack with a three-liter leather in it.

What about what type of boots?

What type of

jacket, clothing?

We got a shell.

What type of beanie

for your purposes?

We call it a toque.

A toque, yes.

No, I, I, I don't, I can't say that I really do a lot of winter hiking, so I never really, never really need a toque, but I've got some hoker hiking boots that I like quite a lot.

I gotta get one of these backpacks.

What for?

It's great.

It's life-changing.

For like wearing.

What are you gonna like for hiking or just

kind of like this like cat my 65?

It's the ideal fit for men yeah but what but but what do you what's only 232 and 45 what do you need it for

what yeah it's black friday sales there are some good good sales oh i just dated this episode very heavily um get my hands on one of these backpacks

is that a 65 liter backpack

uh yeah i think so but i i would probably use it to travel i'd put my clothes in it yeah i'll tell you what you should get

for that yeah i tell you what you should get on black friday sale is the the Codapaxi.

That's a really good

Coda Paxi like bag, Ulpa bag is really good for travel.

Some people use it for backpacking, I think, but that's a really good, that's just a genuine product recommendation.

So what is this that we're looking at here?

It looks like

the stuff I have because there's a whole

why I brought it up.

I was selfishly just wanted to say what I got some nice, I got an Arcterix

fleece that I just got that's very nice.

I got it for my birthday.

And I've got a lot of North Face.

I will rock a lot of the North Face stuff, and also I got a Patagonia

puffer.

Lovely.

North Face shoes are great.

I wear like a lot of North Face Trail Runners.

Oh, my God.

Well, you know, I got my Trail Runners.

I got my Nike Trail Runners.

I bought them actually.

Yeah, they're new.

They're Gore-Tex Trail Runners.

Very nice.

I like them.

Really like them.

Yeah,

you need those around here.

It rains every day.

I know.

I have to go get inserts for my stupid foot now, so I'm gonna go get that and get a pair of Gore-Tex.

This is a toilet, everybody.

It's a best, just because they're not looking at anything.

Well, this is

the product, the product reviews we're gonna read is for a toilet.

It's called the trip tips make a difference.

Now, there's a design flaw in this toilet that you can just immediately see.

I don't see it.

Well, you can flatten it, right?

Okay, ah, I see.

I think I I think I can guess.

Yeah, let's get some reviews in here.

It's a bad design.

And this first guy goes,

Karen actually says, epic fail.

Uh-oh.

I purchased this, set it up for use a few days later.

After one use, it instantly began leaking because of where we were.

I couldn't do it.

I could do nothing but throw it away.

The only thing that went in that toilet was my money.

So, well, no, it sounds like one of some of your shit logs as well yeah i think that's a lie you told us you should

i love

that this yeah

like it's like my dookie leaked out of this thing

like that's horrible you know like i know but if you look at it it's so it's the trip tips upgrade retractable portable toilet travel toilet for for adults it says and it is like uh uh

you can tell that it is going to leak.

Yes.

It looks like it would be like pissing into a colander.

Yeah, yeah.

It just doesn't look like it holds your stuff in it, but that's not the only thing.

I don't think you're pissing into it, are you?

It's for being outside.

Aren't you just pissing in the voice?

Isn't it for

shitting, right?

Specifically, you're shitting into a colander.

I think you're shitting into it, right?

So if it's leaking, maybe fix your diet a little bit because you got runny poops.

You know what I mean?

Just keep them solid and it'll stay in there.

What the fuck did my in-laws have?

In the chicken coop?

I haven't heard a word about them.

They're well, this person.

Maybe you should buy them this for Christmas.

Who are you going to?

Yeah, I wonder who you'll go because you were saying that you're mentioning before we started that your stepmom

when it was in a hot tub for too long.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My stepmom, it did stay in a hot tub for five hours, so uh, uh, that was bad, yeah.

That's a, that's not, that's not, that's way too long, I would say.

Yeah, this person goes, uh, I'm, uh, this person goes, worst investment ever.

Okay,

I don't know if you can see it as an investment buying a travel toilet.

I love this review, though.

This review conjures up great pictures.

This thing leaked every night for four nights.

Whoa,

he kept duking in it.

I know.

that

i know you're like this is gonna be the one

yeah because i put re multiple real trash bags in it not those crappy ones they send it with it didn't look defective but it ruined a 230 tent

wait wait

massacre in the tent

it's what it sounds like it was in the tent oh my god and they were crapping i don't think that's very cool cool to do anyways.

No, I agree.

Because I think it's going to, I believe, I don't, I'm not an expert, but I believe there's an importance to the water that we have here in North America in our toilets for smell purposes.

And I think that if you shit into just a fucking plastic thing,

it's going to linger in your tent afterwards.

Why is it in the tent?

Like, I don't take it outside.

Of course.

That's the whole purpose of this thing.

I'm so upset.

It smelled so bad.

We had to throw it out at the campground and now we can't get a refund.

Again,

so you're admitting to having horribly smelling shit.

All right.

And she didn't, again,

for four days in a tent.

Like, this thing leaked for four days and you didn't notice that.

I could assign me as well means that there's another person.

Yeah, yeah.

She should have noticed that it was leaking within one minute of using it the first time, not four days in well maybe it how about this though maybe they notice it's leaking but they still it's their only option they saw you know was hey we got to keep using this even though it's leaking i mean just shit into a hole though well this next line is great i have an attorney in my family i'm gonna ask about this it ruined four days of a family vacation i mean even with the portable portable ac it smelled awful must have soaked into the tent or ground i don't know it's so gross that is so gross

so i'm right i'm right that it's right of course that it lingered it didn't even have to like it just made the tent you were shitting inside a tiny little tent with no water there you're just like what were you doing after i dude i how does this thing work brian can you explain how it works like how do you

it's it's it's got a bag in it it's like an accordion okay and it has a bag in it that i assume to be biodegradable so you pull it up you crap in it and then maybe you can bury the bag or something.

I don't know exactly what you do with the shit after you do it because I don't know why you would do this.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

And I wonder, hopefully

they were emptying it regularly, right?

I would assume.

And so this guy goes, total piece of crap.

One star.

One use, sat down, did business, tried to clean up, only to end up on the ground with multiple cuts from the plastic.

Oh, no.

Oh, I was just like, I was sitting here thinking, like, how could it be any worse than that story about shitting in the tent?

But I never thought this guy is, this guy's hurt himself.

Well, not only hurt himself, but you end up sitting right in your crap.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You're sitting on it and then it breaks.

And then, you know what I mean?

Yeah, you just listen.

I didn't, oh, I don't even want to say this, but yeah, you don't want to, you hope you don't have any large cuts open.

Right?

Oh, that's not a good combination.

Yeah, this is really, really, uh, I feel like this is a dangerous product, but maybe who knows?

This guy, this guy could have been.

Could be some user error here, maybe.

And he could have, this guy might have been gigantic.

He goes, you know, he could have been like a huge, like seven foot tall, 400-pound.

Like, you know, it's going to be Kevin Nash.

I will tell you that I have, there were people.

I think it said it could like hold up to 250 pounds.

Okay.

So if this guy's bigger than that, I mean, he probably should have read the thing, but he goes, not worth two cents.

The height of the product is great.

So I don't think he's a tall guy.

Right.

Well, maybe he is.

Maybe I think only tall guys are commenting on the height of something.

But I love this next line.

But that's the only good thing I can say.

Cleaning my wounds and very angry.

Oh.

Yeah, no, I get that, brother.

You know what?

I get that, man.

I'd be pretty pissed, too, if I was taking a on this new toilet and then it broke and i sharpened it cut me open me open and then sapped me into my

this one gave it one star and says okay it was cool looking and a great idea for pill cups

and listen if you guys saw it it's like it's just a black tube yeah it's like

Well, it's, and she says it right here.

It's a great idea for pill cups and water.

You know, it's, it is like those portable cups that you can bring up you like put them up and then you can drink out of the cup that's the idea she goes well these are all women oh because i guys mostly would shit in the woods i guess they would just

like into the woods maybe less guys are buying a product like this i just it seems odd women don't tend to review stuff as much as guys uh well in the end she goes

But my big butt twisted the seat reaching to the right and behind me.

Boom, it collapsed.

Not only was I shook, but I skinned my elbow hurt my shoulder and broke the locking hoops to never work again never got to take it camping that part i would say is what were you actually doing what was she doing yeah

testing it out i would imagine just testing it out because she knows she's like i got a bbl this could be this could be an issue and so she tested it out and sure enough thank goodness thank you thank goodness she tested it out you guys are getting on her about it but she could end it up like our other friend fighting you you know, shit in his cuts or whatever.

She could have pulled with the BBL, yeah.

Shit in his cuts.

I did have one more thing, but it's some combat wipes.

Okay,

I don't know.

What do you mean?

They're for wiping your ass.

They're outdoor cleansing and refreshing wipes.

They're 100% biodegradable.

And it says 25 extra thick wipes.

First review causes burning and itching.

Uh-oh.

A product caused my anus to burn and my genitalia

the product called my anus caused my anus

beautifully put

four stars

this is this is this is like oh man you do not want to read this if you're making a product and you go to the reviews

it's a nightmare This product caused my anus to burn and my genitalia to itch furiously when used on those areas.

Absolutely not a body wipe.

The wipe has the ingredient ingredient,

phenoxithanol.

If there's one thing you never put the body wipe,

he totally flubbed that thing.

Oh my God, everyone's laughing so hard at your pronunciation of phenoxyqual.

Oh my God.

He goes,

it's ethanol.

I feel like I've sprayed Lysol on myself.

A body wipe has one necessary function, remove dirt.

By removing dirt, the growth medium for bacteria is also removed.

There's no need for antibiotics or antibacterials in a body wipe.

I'm furious at this company for advertising the product for body in the conditions of camping.

It should not be allowed.

This person says, I feel like cotinelle wipes work and feel about the same.

First of all, they're small and you would need a dozen to actually clean your whole body.

secondly it seems they have no smell or any cleanser don't to them so take a continental wipe then rinse and squeeze it out and that's what you got also they're black which seems a little disturbing to me i can't see how much dirt is coming off

yeah that is that is a bit odd i will say yeah i will say that are they like marketed to men are they like tough you know like oh that's just the family wipe you know yeah

a woman would use a white one because they do because that's the one that makes the most sense finally matt says says one star save your money but a baby butt wipe instead uh this is a glorified rebranded baby butt wipe nothing more smells like one acts like one works like one don't fall for the marketing gimmick of combat wipes like i did so this guy is admitting that

he saw combat wipes and he's like i got it these sound badass yeah he's like i was tired of yeah because

Baby wipes, yeah, baby wipes will work, right?

There's like, there's like water only baby wipes that we have that are Maybe if you're a baby, yeah, exactly.

The thing about them is that they're fucking white as well.

Yeah, you know,

I took these camping with my son.

We were on a three-day hike/slash fishing trip, got these so that we could spruce up daily.

Um, yeah, like I said, could have bought the generic brand at the local grocery store and saved a ton of money.

Yes, it was not

you just described,

you know, being a consumer.

Everyone else figured that out.

Yeah.

Combat.

Well, well, Libby,

not everybody else.

Let's not assume anybody

has figured that out, but most of us, yeah.

I know.

Brian is walking into the wipe store and saying, what are your most expensive wipes?

Oh, 100%.

He's like, do we have any that are a different kind of thing?

I have some.

I have some.

You have expensive wipes?

I have some dude wipes, like really big ones.

And

I took this trip.

See, we're at the end of the show, so so I shouldn't tell this story.

But isn't isn't dude, isn't Dude Wipes like the thing that's on like the podcast?

They'll like, they'll like advertise Bob and Tom.

I'm like Kill Tony and stuff.

It's like a big thing that's like advertised on a bunch of right-wing sort of other, you know, comedy podcasts.

Also Bob and Tom, which is not right-wing.

I think it's advertised on a lot of different, I don't think it's just right.

And also, I don't think Kill Tony is right wing.

Tony Hinchcliffe is, but the, yeah, the show is just a bunch of psychotic people from all different.

But yeah, the, the, I, I, I do think it's just a real podcast ad type thing, you know?

I rented us an Airbnb

in this small town called Alpena, Michigan, because it's the darkest place within six hours of my house.

Right.

We want to go, my wife wants to look at stars again.

Fuck it.

I'll rent this thing.

But what it turned, it was a camper.

And it didn't have a shower at all in it.

And the turlet didn't have water in it.

And it was on on like flat ground.

So, wherever the sewage went, it just kind of sat under the thing.

Oh, no.

And

so,

so, like, we got there, and and like, also, they didn't mention that it was in their driveway.

Oh, yeah, that's my favorite part that you told me.

Yeah,

did we talk about this?

Do we talk about this on the show, or did you just tell me this?

I might have just told you this.

It's in a driveway, and

the guy comes out.

It says it has Wi-Fi.

I need the Wi-Fi.

Oh, yeah.

I know.

You just told me this because it was, we were talking about you like finishing something or posting an episode or something.

Yes, yes.

I need the Wi-Fi and, but it doesn't have Wi-Fi.

The house has Wi-Fi.

Right.

And it's farther enough away from the house that, you know, and the guy comes out.

to tell me as we're about to as we get there he's like yeah you know the Wi-Fi doesn't really get out here, but I don't do a lot of TV watching anyway on vacation.

So I figure that's probably fine.

I'm like, you motherfucker, I do.

So

it was miserable and it smelled like poop.

And then we were like, well, I guess we can't shower.

Let's go get some stuff.

And we got these extra big dude wipes.

And I just, you know, you, you, you pits in your shit.

Shits, you know, you do pits in your shits.

Now, Brian,

hang on.

Brian, Brian, how many times did you shit it?

Or go ahead, Libby.

I'll get to mine after.

Similar, similar sort of question.

You said that the sewage just sort of sits under it.

How do the dude wipes help with that particular problem?

They didn't, but I, my body didn't smell bad.

Okay.

And I didn't shit there, by the way.

Like, I think that was the shit of another person that we were smelling the whole time.

Cause I'm not going to shit.

And at Camper, I went to the grocery store and did that.

Oh, so to be clear, you did shit while you were out there, but you went to the grocery store, which is, again, in Can, that's, we don't have like

the grocery stores don't really have

even bathrooms here.

So that's such a strange concept to me.

Yeah, they do.

No, I mean, they do, but you don't use it save on while I was out there.

But nobody does, you know what I mean?

Like, it's just not a place.

You craft your house.

You crafted the craft there.

You crapped at the save-on by my house.

Like, I didn't, I didn't know there's a, there's a toilet there.

I had no idea.

I lost the place toilet, it didn't handle it right.

Well,

I had to run out of there, okay.

So, because

you know why it's not a good toilet because it's not for the public.

Like, did it seem like you're in like a back kind of no, it was a public restroom.

There was a big sign that said restrooms.

Okay, I just don't even know where that is in the store.

I'm not joking here, I don't know where it is in the store.

I don't know, I don't know

give you directions to get to it now, but why was it in the back of the store?

Did it not

handle it well in the sense that it wouldn't go down for you?

Maybe.

So, like,

it's on vacation, Chris.

So, are you saying you're my craps get exponentially bigger on vacation?

You left one of your big giant Ohio logs in the toilet of my grocery store where I buy my vegetables from.

Makes me so sick.

I can't believe it.

Now, I I need to go and find out where the toilet is in the grocery store and not

apologize.

You've obviously shut it down to the public.

I just mean where it is in proximity to the food so I know what food to not buy anymore from there.

Apologize to them for me next time you go in there.

There's a, I'm not even, this is a true thing.

I'm from Ohio crapped in your toilet.

Like he's really sorry, though.

This is a thing I'm not making, I'm not making this up at all.

Right around the time Brian came to Vancouver and did that, about two weeks later, no word of a lie, there's now a new store manager at that location.

The store manager was there the entire time, and then Brian came here, takes a shit in there, and now new store manager.

I don't know.

Again, I don't, I don't know.

It's like I can't work here anymore.

There's an Ohio guy that visits every now and then.

No, I wouldn't imagine that's what he would say.

I would say he would say, I can't work here anymore.

I feel physically sick from the smell and from the different things that I have to do now.

And I'm at one hour 37 minutes.

This is not something you, you, you know, save it for guys, plus, you know, yeah, save it for the stream.

Yeah, we're

just bases.

I think I kind of knew that, but I didn't know you left it there.

I thought you got it flushed down into the no, I worked on it.

I tried to, I worked on it.

I tried, I did what I could.

Those Canadian toilets are so dainty.

I have never, ever, ever.

Like, we've discussed this before.

Like, a couple of times in my life, I can recall clogging a toilet.

That's Canada's.

Canada must have dainty poops.

I'm sorry.

I don't know.

I mean, you guys, you guys maybe have, you know, more of like a eating, like a little bit, maybe, but not that much.

We're basically the same.

We're eating the same stuff as you, basically, you know?

Not you.

You're eating vegetables and stuff.

I, when I'm on vacation, well, that's your mistake, Chris.

I'm on eating vegetables when I'm on vacation, I'm in a no-vegetable zone, spinach and carrots, although big carrot recall in Canada due to E.

coli, so that's not great.

No, you're dating a goddamn episode.

All right, sorry, Libby, uh, tell people where to find you.

Uh, twitch.tv/slash libtron streaming uh Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 12 p.m pacific come and come and come and join doing some fun baking and stuff you got we gotta make you come on sunday and watch some of our nasty stuff sometime brian i would love to and i would specifically love if we could dive into the world of dogging

uh docking dogging you don't know about dogging dogging all of the look oh this is brian's bit

He has to play it like this or whatever.

He pretends he doesn't know about dogging.

I'm looking at it.

It's a swinging thing, I think, right?

It's a British thing.

It's public swinging.

Usually in like on the sides of highways, you know, like

I've seen, I've seen dogging pornography.

I will admit to that.

It's not like, you know, it's not really my thing.

Did you whack off to it?

Come on, man.

Oh, come on.

Seriously.

Like, I got a.

I'm asking if it's good.

Yeah, no, but that's not, it's not appropriate.

You know, I don't want to, that's, you know, living.

Yeah, there's a woman here.

I can't hear about jacking off.

All I can hear about is clogging toilets with enormous Ohio shit.

Yeah, Brian, thank you.

Brian, there's a girl here, she doesn't know about the stuff we do,

she doesn't know about cubbing and whacking off.

That's it, no, no clue,

never heard about it.

Yeah, all right, well, I can't wait to.

Oh my god, this is a whole world that you are, you are gonna love dogging.

I am like, do people do people talk about it in the same way?

Are there people who talk about it?

Because we can't watch real pornography, you know?

So, like,

is there people who are like, I'm in the dogging world, I do a podcast about dogging, something like that.

Walking the dog.

Yeah.

This guy goes, dogging actually derives from the term walking the dog.

It's a pastime that has evolved from blokes taking their dogs for walks and stumbling across couples at it in the bushes, etc.

So I'm excited to learn about it.

Yeah.

Blokes.

I like it.

I like it because they're talking.

They're like doing, I know you like it.

They're doing this horny.

They're all over it.

They're doing this horny sex stuff, but then they're also like, yeah, yeah, I love that.

And then they've got the cool British accent, you know, which is just like, it's just kind of cool to hear them having sex British, you know?

Yeah, it's, it's crazy because they stay British even when they're having sex.

When they're having sex, which is interesting because when they sing, when the British people sing, they don't stay British.

And so it is, they get American when they sing.

But yeah, I, I, that's true.

I'm not making that up.

They, right, to a point, you can, there's like a bunch of British singers you can't tell they're British when they're singing.

But yeah, when the, when these ladies are being are dogged, or is that?

I think both parties involved are dogging.

I think it's yeah, yeah, yeah, but they definitely stay British.

That's more Australian, you know.

But you can't

do the accent.

You want to try it?

Here, Brian, you try

a British lady dogging, sort of having sex into a British.

Oh, put your cock in me, but

yeah, yes.

That's very good.

We speak bum, obviously.

Oh, yeah.

Put your cock in me, bum, on the side of the road.

On the side of the road.

On the side of the road.

All right.

Thanks for listening, everyone, to the podcast.

I was actually thinking before this episode, I was like, we really do need to.

tone it down with the sex stuff.

Oh, we did.

Sorry.

You could have turned it off a while ago.

And here's the other thing.

That's a good point.

That's actually a good point to make to the listener.

You got to get them up.

You could have turned it off a long time ago, and then you wouldn't have actually heard any of that.

No, we did the plugs.

Anything that happens after the plugs, anything that happens after 90 minutes doesn't count.

Yeah, that's sickos only, right?

Yeah, yeah.

And we'll see you next week with finally an episode where Chris takes some heat.

The big Lebowski guys.

Bye.

It's a cool movie, good movie.