2025 Ep 305 - Use These Power Moves Wisely

43m

We’ve finally locked in the date for our attempt at the World’s Tallest Hat record! We also hear from some very trustworthy candidates to officiate the big day. A few wild power moves have come our way - including one that honestly needs a warning label. Plus, Hamish takes us on an emotional journey as he buys a new baking pan. Meanwhile, despite Andy’s best efforts, Mick (Andy’s dad) is still refusing to ditch his ancient 20-inch TV... so the boys cook up a sneaky plan to trick him into an upgrade. 

1. Tallest hat - trustworthy listeners 
2. Power moves 
3. Operation Win Mick a TV 
4. Hamish’s new baking pan 
5. The Lee Family Gazette 

Listen and follow along

Transcript

A listener production.

Activate your internet.

Cause the Haymission Andy podcast starts in three,

two.

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One.

Ahoy to me god, Hey, Mission.

Oh, wow.

Uh-oh, it's nicknames we had in year eight.

I couldn't help it.

I was too good at sports.

It's like I'm in a huge gambling debt and I have to do something for Hayflage

for the rest of time.

No, it's not that.

In fact, I think this is

this one, guys.

Okay.

But ahoy to me, Coca-Cola, Jack.

Okay.

Ahoy.

Things that are popular.

Well, you're on the right track.

I am Titanic.

Oh, Titanic.

It's the way we use these words rather than actually a link between them.

Well, I mean,

people will say, like, okay, that's the god tier of something if it's like the best,

I don't know, hat you can get.

For example, our tall hat would be the god tier of hats.

But I've never heard Coca-Cola tier.

And then the Titanic tier.

That's what you think is going to be great.

Let's hope our hat is not Titanic tier.

It was very big and it seemed like it would do a good job.

Uh-oh, who's this guy wearing a giant iceberg running out of his...

It's the other tall hat record holder.

No, we have security for that.

Well, we have an Irish sailor, and let's hope he does a good job keeping a lookout.

They are the three most recognized words in the English language.

Really?

Ah, fair enough.

Isn't that, I mean, it's an odd thing to measure, but yes, it's the three most recognized words in the English.

A lot of Coca-Cola, I understand, because they've got a fair bit of marketing behind it.

But, you know, they've still got a heap of people getting the word out.

Titanic.

That is a left field.

That is out of left field.

That's like all publicity is good publicity.

People are still talking about it.

That's it.

Why did you crash?

Why did you crash her?

Look, if we'd have just made the voyage, it would have just been another regular old voyage.

No, but people are still talking about it.

True, I wonder if we'd even know what the Titanic was today not.

Absolutely not.

It didn't crush.

You'll think if you're a relative of one of the victims, you'd be happy enough for it to just go.

No, exactly.

But, you know, James Cameron, for instance.

Thrilled.

Thrilled.

He went on to win Oscars for it and made a lot of money.

So, you know, there were several films.

There was one for him to settle.

Yeah, there.

Tough conundrum.

Yeah.

Different film if it made it.

Boar and quick.

Quick.

Quick and not as many.

Yeah, certainly not as many Oscars.

No.

Ahoy also to David in Canada, Ham.

Use the very easy to use system at Hamachinery.com to tell us what he's been up to.

Ahoy boys, this is David from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada.

I started listening to the podcast about a year ago.

I've been listening at a rate of about two episodes a week, and I just finished episode 100.

So a little discouraging to see that I'm still 195 episodes behind.

I would love to catch up someday and be right in there with the the modern episodes, but I'd love to be able to contribute to what's happening in the podcast, but it feels like I'm too far behind.

So I have this idea of a way that you can give a little wink, a little nod to me and all the other very important podcasters that are trying our best to catch up from a distance behind.

So in a few seconds, I'm going to say a swear word, and then I'll know because I'll check at the most recent podcast that you've released in the next few weeks.

If I see a little E beside the podcast name for explicit then i'll see that as you almost giving me and all the other podcasters that are behind a nice warm appreciative acknowledging hug so three two one

fuck

cheers boys okay i mean he gave fair warning and

there's no chance we're not getting an e on that because it's nice and clear it was clear enunciated well do you know i was just like what does this feel like this feels like

interstellar.

Like, it feels like a message from the past that appears in the future.

Like, it does feel like he's time traveling somehow because he's stuck in the past listening to these old messages from like four years ago, these old podcasts.

I just appreciated that he gave the countdown.

So if anyone was in Cars with Kids, they could easily just dip at that point.

And I appreciate that he's doing two a week.

That's twice the recommended serving.

He's a hungry boy.

But you can be hungrier than that.

You could do five a week.

Oh, that's just too much.

He's just too much.

But that's why.

He'll be sick of us by the time he catches it back up, which would just ruin it.

Yeah, you've got to ruin it.

You can have

all the podcasts you want, but it will make you sick.

But that is sort of what the government mandated break.

If there is any silver lining in that, whilst Nanny and I are screaming at the sky, just railing against the break, you can use that to gorge, if you want, even three episodes a week to close the gap.

So best of luck.

If you've got a friend that is stuck in the past doing that, we recommend they use their summer wisely.

Haim, we've got to get onto something that no doubt he'll enjoy once he gets there.

It's a huge announcement today of our quest to break the record for having the tallest hat.

The Inside Word.

Conversations of Tor Hat Construction.

Thanks to Topstage Advanced Composites.

We make cool stuff out of fiberglass and carbon okay genuine things are being locked in here we've done just enough updates i think i think people go okay we don't we get it updates we get it it's a hat that is much taller than any other hat i've ever seen we get it and it's not easy to make such a hat i've never made one no one's ever made one it is the world's tallest there's engineering involved all of that i think is almost done yes it's now time at some point you got to put the bastard on your head and walk And that's what we're gunning for.

That's the, not that I'm trying to just add more E-words into

this episode, but at some point, we just got to walk.

When are we doing it, Andy?

We can tell everybody that we will attempt.

I mean, this could have been a Peter out.

It had Peter out all over it.

It should have.

It should have.

Should have been.

In fact, I think I called it early.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

And on that, Top Stage Advanced Composites have done a fantastic job, haven't they?

They actually saved it probably from being a Peter Out because once they started, now it'd be so rude to not do it after they put off work in.

Yeah, now we're almost,

you think the hat is a passenger on us, but we're merely passengers underneath the hat, whoever gets to pilot it.

In three weeks from today, we'll be attempting the record, everybody.

And you'll hear it on September 11th.

Yep, that's when

yeah, that Thursday is September 11th.

I think we're doing the attempt on September 8th.

How is the hat getting out?

Have we already talked about this?

How does it get from, because we're going to do it at Hawges' warehouse?

We need a place outside is obviously susceptible to wind and you'd hate for the attempt to get ruined by wind or rain.

So you need an indoor place with a very, very high roof.

Yep.

Logistics of all that we'll talk about next week because what we need to do is we put out at haymishnatur.com

who could come and be our officials, like when tatslotto has government officials that make sure that it is obviously all legit because

this is this all was because we discovered it costs tens of thousands of dollars if you get guinness involved yeah you know that's how and that's fine that's how they make their cash but we didn't really they rely on fm breakfast shows around the world um

deciding that it's worth 10 or 20 or 30 thousand dollars to go for a guinness world record and stuff your underpants full of as many bait beans as you can see if you can beat the record by two or three beans.

Take it off those guys from San Francisco.

Bring it back to Brisbane or whatever your desire is.

That's how Guinness makes their money and that's fine.

We are like, well, why don't we just save that money?

Yes.

And we will all know we've got the record.

We don't need to be in a book.

We'll know we've got the record.

And we'll know because we have the most trustworthy listeners watching it to make sure everything was above board.

We put a form up at hamishani.com asking for people to apply to be our officials, Ham.

I think the form was: we're measuring people on, prove their trustworthiness, just general trustworthiness,

how well they can take in distances, both vertical and horizontal.

That's very important for this.

And the ability to pay attention, because obviously, you know, we're not.

I don't want to be drifting off.

We've got to walk 10 whole meters, and you don't want someone getting distracted halfway through the walk.

The worst thing you could have from a government official is have them nudge the person next to them and go, what happened?

That wasn't paying attention.

You just never see that.

No, you never see that.

Now we're hoping it's one and done, but there might be multiple attempts here.

If we can't.

As long as the hat holds up.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We'll keep trying.

Anyway, these were the submissions.

Skill required.

Extreme trustworthiness.

I'm incredibly trustworthy.

As a teen, I worked for the Queen's Estate in a coffee shop, and an American tourist came in once and offered me £10,000 for the apron I was wearing simply because it had the Crown Estate logo on it.

I didn't sell.

What teen turns down £10,000?

I'm extremely trustworthy.

I'm registered with Engineers Australia and underneath the Commonwealth Statutory Declarations Regulations of 1993, I can actually witness a stat deck.

That's a pretty trustworthy thing to be able to do.

I'm also a Justice of the Peace, which is the most trustworthy member of the community.

I haven't progressed to shopping centre JP table, but hey, dare to dream, boys.

A couple of years ago, I met you at the McFanning Golf Dead and ended up with Andy's personal email address in order to pass that on to the person at work that looks after partnerships.

Or, to speak plainly, the Weasel Opportunity Department.

And ever since, resisted the temptation to ruin his presumably extremely tidy and well-maintained inbox with all kinds of dodgy website sign-ups.

Skill required.

Distance judgment.

As a former youth international pole vaulter, I feel uniquely qualified to help judge the tall hat record attempt.

I used to cheerlead, and my role within the team was the flyer.

So I was the one standing on the shoulders, getting tossed in the air.

So very, very experienced, up high.

I know the above height topography like the back of my hand.

With golf I don't use a range finder, I just old dig the club so I can guess the distance pretty well and also with my work I actually have to calculate distances so that's pretty good.

So when someone tells me that they're six feet tall I have to mentally stack six foot long sandwiches end to end to visualize how big that is.

If you for some reason decide to go in Imperial I will have to use a workaround based around meatball subs but I'm sure we can make that work.

For the past 20 years I've studied measurement as a a registered surveyor so can confirm the world's tallest hat to a legally binding standard.

Still required.

Hyper-fixated attention.

I'm a statistician at the Australian Open Tennis.

I get paid to watch tennis and basically never blink.

And if you know tennis you know matches can go for 45 minutes or five hours and I'm there court side laser focused the entire time.

You know with TikTok these days at least three second videos I I can actually sit through like a 15 to 20 second TikTok.

So

I'm pretty sure I'll be able to watch the whole thing.

I'm a mummer too so at any given time there's a million things happening, there's dinner cooking on the stove, there's a three-year-old about to draw on a newly painted wall and there's an 18-month-old climbing on absolutely anything she can reach and I'm across it all.

Nothing gets past me.

I've been working on paying attention.

With cricket season approaching, I pride myself on being able to watch the entire first session of a test without falling asleep.

Come to lunch break or afternoon sessions, all bets are off.

Hopefully the hat launch will be in the morning, but I understand that atmospheric conditions may impact takeoff.

So many candidates, Abe.

Wow.

Is there anyone that stands out to you that's a must?

Yeah, I do like the idea of the

junior pole vaulter.

Yeah.

And I loved it.

Who was the woman that was, I understand the...

above the head

topography, yeah.

She was a flying cheerleader.

I like someone that understands what it's like up there.

And she's almost lived as a hat.

You know, she's been up at hat height.

So I feel like she's going to be there.

The civil engineer.

I mean, the surveyor, sorry.

The surveyor who legally can, could he bring one of the things on the tripod?

Well, that'd be nice, wouldn't it?

Even if it's to me, if we don't use it, it'd be nice to have it look that there's prop.

Look, we'll reach out to them.

Obviously, we've got the date now, but this is so exciting.

Five, should we fly in five?

I mean, a few of them from Britain, so we're not going to do that.

It seems like a long trip.

Let's fly in five.

We'll fly in five people.

Because ever since the special skills debacle, you know, we've been saving $80, $90 a week

that we were spending on the cheapest available airfares.

And so let's just blow it on this.

Yeah.

And look, it's money that would have gone to Guinness had we chosen that route.

So this is a much better way to start.

I mean, they're not anti-Guinness.

And I might even suggest we go and have one to celebrate.

Would they like that, do you think?

Or do you think, is that a

wouldn't it be nice to be able to say, and you know what?

The other day, we had a Guinness and a world record

record.

And when we post a picture of it, we can just do Guinness, comma, world record

as the caption.

We've got him, mate.

We've absolutely got him on a barrel there.

Hey, they keep coming in, and we do want to be known as the podcast that you can turn to to get the upper hand in any social situation.

Hence, power moves.

Can I start with one that I,

I'm not sure is a power move, but I did find it amusing anyway.

That is a category all in itself.

It's from Jacinta.

I think she flags that she's not sure if it's a power move.

She said, some friends of mine live in a sharehouse situation with some family friends.

There's a mum, dad, daughter, and then a couple of family friends, which I think is an interesting old thing.

Yeah, it's a sitcom.

When the daughter moved out to go into state, they didn't repurpose her room, but they use it now as the fart room.

And they all go purposely in there to release gas.

I mean, it's not a power move.

No.

I mean, when she comes back and goes, what has happened in my room?

I guess that's one to go.

Well, can we tell you a little secret we've done eight months of farts well she said it's been nearly a year since that but there still remains the fart room i mean the farts will get out yes eventually but i suppose they will soak it well they i don't think over time

no i just think it's i think it's the feel of the the disrespect of the yeah i think that's more the issue that is true isn't it yeah i mean look yeah it's a kind of power

what'd you guys use what'd you guys do in my room while i was away don't worry about that yes

Haim, kick us off.

Okay.

Look, this is

certainly in the category of,

well, no pun intended, but it is an asshole move.

This can be used against someone who has done you wrong, writes Lennon.

And I think it might be a bit of a classic too, but you've got to admit it is a power move.

Write their phone number on the stall of a public toilet.

And look, at the time, I was thinking, okay, just, you know, we've got to be careful where these ones go.

But write the words, send me a photo of your poo.

This is forever a power move is the individual cannot stop it.

They can't block the people that are sending the photos because it's going to be a different person each and every time.

Yeah.

I would say use, that is awful.

Use Kef.

Like obviously use very wisely.

That's like new killer codes.

I mean, you'd invade.

It's hard to walk that one back.

You're going to wake up six months down the track and go, I shouldn't have done that.

I need to either drive back to Aubrey and go to that pub or call the pub and go, listen, cubicle four.

I've had to think about it and I regret what I did.

Also, an a-hole move here from Johan.

It seems to be more of those moves than pleasant ones, but he goes, this actually happened to me.

And I can confirm how small and powerless it made me feel.

Great.

Picture this.

You're at a friend's place for a party or a hangout, and they've got a Google Nest or Alexa.

He's got Google Nest.

Something similar, a speaker in the living room.

When you leave, you're about to casually say, hey, Google, set an alarm for 3 a.m.

and crank the volume to 100%.

Someone did it to them?

Yes, he said.

I then got a text from my friend saying, thanks for having me sleep well.

Really good.

This comes from a man that said, please don't use use my full name.

Okay.

But I'm only going to use the first initial so he knows who he is.

C.

He says, if you're in a position like I am at work and you are just so sick of replying to emails from customers demanding things from you, simply turn on your vacation response, but put in the message, this email violates company email policy and therefore has been rejected automatically.

So

you never have to respond and they're just left wondering, what did I do that violated the

Really like that.

Natalie, power move.

It's a social media power move.

When you see a video on social media, TikTok or Insta, or someone flexing where they're showing off that they're hot or they're showing off luxury.

You should be able to find one of those on there.

You might just comment something like, I think I saw you working at McDonald's at Westfield.

You did such great service.

that is good all right last one

from lily here um she's reporting her boyfriend she's in the uk at the moment uh he

is this has happened to him i guess he's come home and gone i didn't know what to do about this and she's gone well me neither but i know who to tell about it

he's a teaching assistant And which usually means you're younger, like, you know, you might only be five years older or less than like the students that you're teaching if you're at a high school.

And the kids have started calling him virgin.

And he is in a pickle because he doesn't know what to say.

He can't argue with them that he's not a virgin,

but he can't also just accept the nickname virgin.

So he's really checkmated.

It's a good brother.

Hey, a few weeks back,

I was telling you about how my dad's never bought a TV in his life.

He's

somehow he's one, two,

got one from you when you moved out.

And that's gotta be.

So my calculations has gone through 60, no, it can't be, but 50 years of television.

Yeah, that's it.

So

nearly 45.

So still

a lot of years per TV.

That is an economical use of TVs.

And his current TV, though, the current TV is the biggest.

That's the showstopper that I tell people when I'm retelling this story.

I go, guess how big Andy's dad's TV is?

And they go, oh, 110 inches, thinking that you've set your old man up well.

Yeah.

And no, you're off by some 90 inches.

20.

20 inch telly.

And huge for a MacBook.

Yeah.

All for a TV.

And so I've been encouraging him to get a bigger one.

I was going to help him out.

He doesn't want a bigger one.

He's like, it sits nicely in the purpose-built cabinet that we built in 1994, which we thought we were oversizing because we thought televisions will get bigger.

And so he's been reluctant to take on a bigger telly.

We're having a giggle about that, the fact that his television is 20 inches.

And Haim, you said we should make him feel like he won another one.

Well, he's refusing.

If he refuses to buy one and won't let you buy one for him,

the only way around this is to trick him into thinking he's won one.

So he's won two from a raffle.

We've gone down that route again.

I'll set the scene.

We went out to where dad lives.

I met a young fellow called Angus there, who's in the Scouting Association, because we thought if you're selling raffle tickets for scouts, dad was a scout leader.

Yep, that's absolutely kryptonite.

Well, no, opposite of catnip, mixnip, four, four, four for your dad.

And there is a scouting theater show called Campbell Showtime, which I was on stage with.

And so, and that was the kind of thing they do fundraisers for.

So, Angus is a scout from the exact scout hall that dad was at.

Perfect.

Okay.

And he was selling tickets to raise funds for Campbell Showtime.

Okay.

This is like when I don't know how deep people are into their fishing, but when you go fishing and the bait perfectly matches what the species would eat.

We cannot miss here.

We will catch a snapper.

This is the perfect bait.

We never miss with this.

And we know exactly where the snapper is.

Yes.

It's a school of one.

We're going to dangle the bait right in front.

No fish can resist this.

So the only worry was, would he have money on him?

You know, because it was $2 a ticket and we didn't have F-boss facilities.

So that was the only

worry for us.

Anyway, we met.

in a side street and it's kind of like a reversed heist.

We're actually trying to get a TV into his house, but through a raffle situation,

Angus's mum was there.

She dropped him off and waited in a side street.

And we met to see if we could get the first part of this whole ruse underway.

The team assembled in a perfectly ordinary patch of suburbia.

No dark alleys, no smoky back rooms.

Just the masterminds behind the operation and a plan to pull off one of the greatest reverse heists of all time.

All right Angus.

Part of Operation Make Dad Believe He's won another TV in a raffle.

We have a mini operation before that which is Operation Get Dad to buy a raffle ticket.

Of course.

You've been bought in.

You're the perfect candidate because you go to the scout group that my dad used to be a leader at that I used to go to, First Canterbury.

So be prepared for boring stories from him.

It's always from scout leaders, isn't it?

Yeah, okay, good.

So you know the drill.

You're going to go up, try and convince him to buy one.

Yep.

Yeah.

Do you want to practice at all?

Oh.

Yeah.

Okay, good.

Oh, hey, welcome.

I'm here selling tickets, fundraising for Campbell Showtime.

Oh, yeah, he'll do no Showtime.

One thing, though, when you said welcome, he'll be at his house, so you don't have to welcome him.

That's a good pickup.

That's good, that's good.

Yeah, so do you want to buy a ticket?

How much is the ticket?

$2.

$2.

Cheap.

Good prizes as well.

Okay, awesome.

He might ask the prizes in this stand, but I'm more likely, I think he's going to go, Showtime.

My son was in showtime.

There you go.

And then he'll start telling you long stories.

Gotta love that.

I think you just have to bear with them.

Yeah, I'll stick through it.

And then get in the ticket, get all the details.

Yep.

And then you can just walk out as if you go to the next house.

We'll pick you up in the getaway car.

Perfect.

Sounds good.

We're on here.

We're on.

The crew was set.

This was part Ocean's 11, part school carpool.

There were still some small details to decide upon as they made their way to Andy's dad's house.

Jess, you're the getaway driver.

I'm so nervous.

Who are you channelling?

Are you channelling Ryan Gosling from Crash?

Was it Crash?

Right, drive.

That's probably

that.

What's that lady with the curly hair

in the kidnapping movie, the comedian?

Oh.

She's in the car.

Mois in the car?

Yeah, that's who I'm channeling.

I can't hear her, right?

I don't know the reference.

And she's like, is she a good driver?

Yeah, but she's really annoying.

Like she annoys the guy.

Right.

Or what about Baby Driver?

Oh, it's a great movie.

Great movie, yeah.

Now we're in Angus's level of field.

I have no idea what that is.

Alright, we're pulling into Dad's street.

Same street I drop on.

And then I think you just pull up here and we'll let Angus out.

It's

on the right-hand side.

It's the white picket fence there.

Perfect.

Yep.

Easy.

And then I'll just walk towards this end of the street.

Yeah, and don't be distracted by the box hedges at the front.

Yeah.

because I've made them all with my box hedge company when I was about 12 years old and they are really impressive.

So just again, keep focused.

Perfect.

Got a job to do.

Yeah, okay, good luck.

With Angus wearing a wire, the plan was in motion.

The crew went dark.

From the safety of the getaway car, the man who started it all could only watch and listen in, hoping the target took the bait.

Didn't seem very nervous, Dickie.

That's great, it's cool.

Looks like

now he's looking back at us.

Don't look at us.

Hello, nice to meet you.

I'm Angus.

I'm selling tickets.

We're fundraising for Campbell Showtime.

Oh, perfect.

Now, kids are in the showtime.

Oh, there you go.

Thank you.

He's made a good start.

He's conversing with dad.

dad.

He didn't look nervous at all.

You got changes for you?

I've got tens and coins.

I should have changed.

Oh, awesome.

Thank you.

There's ten.

Thank you.

I'll write you your tickets out.

So you're saying your kids are in it?

Yes, yes.

I'm not.

Alex leave back then and

Andy Lee.

There you go.

Name rings a bell.

What was your name?

Michael.

Michael.

I'll put your name on that.

You're doing a great job.

Lee?

Lee W.

There you go.

Have you got a phone number on you?

Big spender.

Perfect.

I'll give you five.

Oh, yes, sorry.

I'll do that.

It's got five tickets.

Thank you.

I'll tell you out five tickets.

Five.

So you write your name on the other one, see?

Yes.

That's a good joke from Dad.

Nice to know where he gets it from.

Thank you.

What was your name?

My name's Angus.

There you go.

Enjoy.

Thank you for buying some tickets.

Enjoy.

Thank you.

Amazing.

Amazing.

Like taking candy from a baby.

Or like giving TV to an old man.

Oh, he's going back this way, Coach.

He's done bloody well.

Get him straight back in the car.

Sensation, get it, get it.

Oh, shit, don't.

Alright.

Tell us when we're cleared, yes.

And just like that, they were out of there.

The kid stayed cool.

And the target?

Blissfully unaware he's about to be the new owner of a 55-inch 4K beauty.

Mission accomplished.

Yeah, we're clean.

Oh, well done.

You did it like a regular Melita McCarthy.

Whatever film you're talking about there.

hey i love get your hand down get your hand down just in case mick on the front porch goes hey you bastards trying to give me a free tv i warn you kids stop trying to give me tvs

i think he got away with it we had to drop his him back to his mom And then he says, well, what do I do with the 10 bucks?

Because we had this day we had stolen from him.

I think all, I mean, he's a scout, so he's going to do the right thing.

He's probably going to to donate it to the troop.

Well, I just said, yeah, that's you.

That's yours, mate.

Thanks very much.

Felacious headline.

Andy Lee underpays child worker with pitiful cash payment thieved from father.

So we now into phase two

and the final phase, we hope.

of this reversed heist.

And we invite lies into the studio.

Hey, Lies.

Hey guys.

Huge week for you.

You've obviously got to get the three groupings at the start of the episode.

And that's obviously the worst work and takes up most of your week.

Double work week here, Lise.

You have to come in.

What are you more nervous about?

The three groups of three or trying to prank dad?

This prank.

I'm scared.

Because be honest, the groups of three takes five seconds.

Lies, we've given you a little bit of a backstory.

Your Denise from the Burandara Scouting Association, you're going to call Dad now, Michael, and just tell him that he hasn't won first prize, but he has won the second prize.

It'd be interesting to see whether he doesn't want the 55-inch.

We've listed it as a 55-inch, and mum would protest that.

This is the whole, I mean, let's go back now.

The whole reason we're doing this is because he wouldn't accept it from you as a purchase handler.

No, there was obviously a simpler option here, which is, hey, I'm your son and I bought your TV.

And he's just like, I don't want it.

And it also, he seemed, though, to warm to the idea.

And he enjoys his origin story as someone that only wins television.

That's his superpower.

So we're hoping

he will just be like, okay,

we know it's 35 inches too big, but will he accept it?

Because he's won it.

Lise, I've just jotted down there for you.

If you can at the end, go, have you ever won anything like this before?

Because I just would like to see him again.

If he reels off the list, if he reels off the list of the TVs, he's one.

Are you ready, Lars?

Yes, I'm ready.

Okay, here we go.

Hello.

Hello.

This is Denise calling on behalf of Burandara Scouting Association.

Am I speaking to Michael?

You are, you are.

Oh, great, Michael.

How are you?

I'm well.

We haven't won a rattle, have we?

Well, you actually have.

You bought a ticket.

I believe you bought a ticket.

And I'm ringing to say that you've been successful because

your ticket was drawn.

You didn't win first prize, though, sadly, which was the hotel accommodation package, but you did get the second prize, which is a 55-inch Q LED TV.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, congratulations.

Very good.

Congratulations.

That's our second one we've won.

Oh,

second one from us.

No, second TV.

We've won.

Oh, so you've won a TV before.

Yes, yeah, which is great.

That's perfect.

But it's a while ago since we won that other one.

How long ago?

Well, it's probably about 20 years ago.

We've still got the same one, even though our kids keep telling us, no, it's the wrong one.

Oh, really?

Well, lucky free upgrade for you.

Oh, perfect.

That's great.

Oh, fantastic.

Michael, I'm glad you're excited about it.

Someone will circle back to organise the delivery of the TV.

We'll grab your dates at your free so we can drop it off.

Oh, great.

Perfect.

Thank you very much.

Thank you so much for your support, Michael.

Have a great day.

Thank you.

Bye.

Bye.

You want a TV?

Yes.

Family members to have enormous TVs.

Lies killed it.

Killed it.

Outstanding.

Also, we won a TV.

It's worked.

It's worked.

Keep putting it out there.

He can go and take his vision board down now.

It's a 20-year-old vision board with cutouts from Vogue.

Get us a TV.

I can't believe he didn't reference his first ever one.

Because that's what he told me that he won at a primary school raffle.

So maybe it's so like that would have been 40 years ago, 45.

So maybe he's.

But I love they went straight into reeling off his pedigree.

Yeah.

Sorry if I don't seem too excited there, Denise, because this was a funny thing.

I do this shit all the time.

Very good at winning TV.

Well done, Lice.

Thank you.

And thanks to Angus as well.

Before we go,

can we just isolate that bit where he does, I think, yell to mum.

I've watched this.

This, Andy, this is what you're after.

All the hard work is this.

This is the bit where it pays off.

You want a TV?

Amazing.

Congrats, guys.

A little bit of a must-be-nice here, self-reporting, but I bought a new baking pan the other day.

Come on, off Instagram.

No, Jack.

Off the shelf at a shop.

Really?

At a homeware shop.

Yeah, I saw it and went, you know what?

That has been, but I wasn't meaning to buy it.

So it was an impulse buy.

Where are you in the shop?

Just looking at other stuff.

He's a lot of different people.

Doodling around.

I was just at Westfield.

Just dawdling around.

Right.

So you were in a Westfield and you're like, oh, God.

I was waiting for Zoe.

I I was just like, come on.

And you just, anything counts as distraction when you've got the kids.

Like she was nearby and we went, oh, it's going here.

Right.

And it was a homeware store.

You know, it was like a homeware's type store.

Yep.

So

then it kind of popped back into me.

I was like, yes, actually, our baking, current baking pan is bent, like it's gone a bit wonky.

And it's just so.

It just has generations and generations and generations of burnt

of, you know, the black corners, like burnt olive oil burnt butter whatever is in the corner

and over over years that just becomes when you do the dishes when you have a baking pan there are bits that you know are new like oh that's the bottom of a potato i can scrape that off and then there are bits that you just accept it's not they're not it's not clean because it's not there when you bought it but there are parts in the corner that you go no no that's just part of the pan i agree it's moved over to the pan side that's not removable anymore we don't count that as food it can't hurt anyone it's been there for years that's just become part of the furniture i view it like plaque on a tooth it's like well you got eventually

to get that like i'm brushing my teeth with special equipment yeah i don't know if you even can get this stuff off i suppose i could find the old panzelin and drill into it to see what's behind there but you know like

How could you, even if you use like chisels and stuff, like that is just part of the pan.

No, you know, after years.

My dad is very good at it.

Well,

the thrill, like you take the pan home.

Yes.

Right.

And we're doing, and I was doing a roast.

You take the pan home and to have, it's just almost like your eyes can't believe it.

Like it's so new.

It's the newest thing you've ever seen.

Yes.

It's more of a, it's a more intense feeling than a new car.

You're just like, look at this thing.

It's like sparkles because it's like this, the non-stick.

And you're like, this is just.

wild.

So, you know, give it a rinse.

Zoe's like gave a rinse, tried it, and like it was ready to roast.

Zoe is fierce on you must rinse everything when it comes back from the shops.

Fair enough.

I think we've talked about it before.

Like, she won't let me wear t-shirts straight out of the packet because you're like, oh, the factory, the factory.

What she thinks goes on at the factory is just people racing around, licking them,

stamping their dirty feet on them, or whatever she thinks happens.

Anyway, wash it, put the potatoes in.

You know, it was a

crisp, a deep roast of the potatoes.

A very deep roast.

She burned them.

And

well, I was like, okay, this is the first hit out of this pan.

Yes.

And there's some, yeah, very, very deep roast.

But that's, we all love a well-cooked potato.

Hey, side, so then you have to wash it up, right?

Yes.

Mill was a hit.

Do you do this, Anna?

Because I've got a friend that does this, and he's a bit, he's as pedantic as you, Marco.

He has two scrubbers in the kitchen because he, if you've got, if you've cooked a chicken schnitzel, you've cooked a roast, whatever, and you've got a pan or something with a lot of oil and grease in it he won't put the um the scrubber you know that has the clear the the tube that has the detergent inside the handle yes and the kind of the scrubbing head with the sponge he won't put that into that

oil because once the oil gets on it it's then ruined forever yeah so he has another one that comes in for first it gets rid of the first layer then he sends the pristine sponge in for the finishing job yeah i think i'm doing the same thing amazing particularly if there's some tough, tougher, like, you know, the bottom with the muck that you can't get off normally.

I'll send in hot water, get the sponge.

I'll do hot water first.

I'll take a layer of

and then steel wool, the one that doesn't actually absorb anything, like not a sponge, but like a steel wool.

Yeah, or one of those type of ones, and then go to the cleaning agent.

Well, it was, I do have the steel wool.

Anyway, so I washed the pan as good as I can, but the corners are burnt.

Like there's some burning.

There's having the corners.

It was a deep roast.

It was a deep roast.

It was a very deep roast.

And I gave it so much hando.

And I had the steel wool and it was saying to scratch the lighting.

I'm like, this feels

poisonous and forever chemicals.

So I don't want to do that.

But it was a shame because one cook in

two of the corners now, there's just some of that black.

And you go.

Did you have enough oil?

Well, I've tried.

What's that?

Did you have enough oil for the

when you started?

Like, yeah, I mean, it was just, you know, like it's drizzled in, like, it's, there's a, you know, a few centimeters of oil in the bottom.

Yeah.

But yeah, you go, it was just an interesting moment in the pan's history.

I just thought, here we are, we've seen the death of one pan and it's just gone out with decades of burn, like burns like layered on.

And here we are at the birth of the new pan.

One and done.

One in.

You go, well, welcome to the family.

Like you, you're, you now live in those two corners forever.

And we'll never, you'll be with us for every meal from from now on like you will be part of our life quite extraordinary

so i just glanced at my phone um during that last break we had and dad has text the whole lee family gazette which is in his family yes this is big easily big enough news to make the gazette i've seen some of the stuff that makes the gazette and it's the threshold is low yeah it is um in amongst the photos of my nephews

their grandkids which generally we yeah high rotation guess who just won a tv in a raffle he writes 55 inch is a bit big though for us so he's oh no he's not trying to farm it off is he no no he's selling it so mum's gone are you serious they're not together i just threw the raffle tickets out or is this a different raffle

My sister's then given laugh, laugh emojis.

Then said, are you guys in the same room?

Talk to each other.

Can't wait to hear how this unfolds.

This is from my sister.

And congrats on the big win, Dad, XX.

Dad writes, I'm heading back into the bin now.

He thinks he's lost it.

My brother, what was the raffle for?

Dad, Scouts Showtime raffle.

Bec chimes in with congratulations, Mickey, amazing star face, star eyes emoji.

Dad then triumphantly goes, found them, and has taken a photo of five tickets all ripped up, and he's trying to piece them back together.

Man, he's already won.

He's won.

Well, then they're going to get to the door and go, and now all we need to see is the completely unforgeable stub of your end of raffle ticket that looks like every other raffle book in the world.

He writes, not sure which one, but I'm getting the sticky tape out.

Right.

I wrote back, well done.

Do you want me to mock up what the 55-inch looks like in your space?

Because because last time he got me to take a photo and put photoshop different

different sizes on and that's where we're at that's where we're at at the moment i do we go do we just for fun go deep on this and have someone turn up at the door and go now we just need to see the ticket

sorry it looks like you ripped these up and stuck them back together that does void us you look at the you look at the terms and conditions needs to be a pristine ticket

i mean now we've completely lost sight of why we started this and now we're just messing with an old man.

No, I think we stay the course.

I think we can try and get a TV in there.

I don't want to tell him though until the TV is in position unlocked and unpacked and there's

what's the chances of him hearing this though?

I don't know.

We've got to move quick.

We're going to move quick.

No, but he'd be like my, I mean, my dad doesn't listen, but my mum doesn't either.

But if it's, we've probably got to keep this stuff off socials.

Yeah.

If mum saw this on a highlight, she'd be across it.

But yeah, let's keep it off socials.

Okay.

Thanks for listening.

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