Sarah Silverman asks WHY?!

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Cheers.

Welcome to the Handsome Pod.

We're taking Fortune.

And we're joined by Mae Martin.

Woo!

Oh my gosh, Fortune.

As I look at your beautiful, handsome t-shirt, I realize I left all of my merchandise in Nashville no

yes yeah yeah I'm so bummed where did you leave it in a Nashville

in a garbage can in the theater the hotel

I guess in the theater yeah I think I left it backstage it looks great on you Fortune it looks great look I'm wearing us on my shirt

Thomas is there a way I can still get merchandise Oh yeah we can send you some that's what I like to hear look at that well I'm wearing this you guys because today is a very very special episode in the why is that podcast well my friend uh today we are celebrating our 100th episode

can you believe it that's insanity i thought we were gonna make it past that first april

we're at two years in we've made it past two aprils yeah we have yeah congrats guys and we're on shirts It's one of my longest, healthiest relationships.

I know.

And I feel like we just keep

getting stronger and better, and our communications improved.

Yes.

Did we have bad communication?

Well, we communicate a lot now

more than we did two years ago.

That's true.

We would be good candidates now if we wanted to try a triad in our lives because we're really good now at like a three-way relationship I think wait what is a triad it's a threesome a thrupe pull yeah that's what a triad is yeah a triad what about a triathlon that's something else we could each take on one different part of the um athlon that is definitely different than a thrupel in it in it what's a triathlon again biking swimming running yes yeah it's all cardiac you don't want to do any of them No, can I lift a little weight?

You won't be in a triathlon, but you sure can.

You can do, yeah, you can stand around and flex.

I think you would prefer to be in a throwple than a triathlon.

Do you guys?

Are you surprised by how I mean?

I'm surprised by not that I didn't know it would be great, this podcast, but it's become so big and

beautiful.

And yes,

what a community.

It's

right when I think that it's not as

popular or big, then I go somewhere else.

And then I don't know.

I don't, I'm shocked.

I guess that's all I'm saying.

I'm shocked every time I'm shocked that people listen, who listens, and what they get out of it, the different ages, the demographics, all of it.

I'm just like, oh my lord.

It's such a fun treat to unwrap each time.

And how well everybody knows us now.

Like, we, cause in two years, we've been all been through life changes and talked about it.

And it really is like, I feel like people really know us.

It's nice.

I feel like I know you guys a lot better.

Yeah, for sure.

Because when we started this, all of us were friends, but there were a lot of things we didn't know about each other.

Yes, yes.

And we've had some giggly times.

We've had hard times.

We've had really hard times.

yeah and then we've giggled again yeah you know it always comes back to the giggles which i love yes and then we giggled again yeah i i think that's an interesting opening to

what

have we learned about each other that is surprising

Oh, good question.

Thank you.

Because I would say it's a lot of it is

surprising because the podcast was built on, hey, we're friends in the comedy world, but we don't know each other deeply well.

But we've enjoyed running into each other in the

comedy scene.

And so we've certainly gotten to know each other's, you know, highs, lows, quirks, and, you know, all of those things.

I'm sure that

is surprising.

Okay.

What jumps out for me is like, well, we all have our, you know, you have your kind of stage persona or whatever.

And I guess I always, like, Fortune, I would say

you're so bubbly and self-deprecating and stuff, but

it's been wonderful to also meet this like warrior inside you.

Like you are also a very confident, very astute, very driven

person.

And so that's been cool.

Like it's, you know what I mean?

And then Tig conversely.

who, you know, you you have a high status.

Yeah, Tig conversely, you're just sitting around you're insecure not driven no you're you're there's like a real softness and sweetness that i mean i i did know i obviously knew that was there but like there's a self-deprecating soft sweetness there as well so i guess it's just the different shades of ourselves that i've you know that we're three-dimensional people i guess yeah

yeah yeah and so what did you think what did you think was the one-dimensional part of us well like the like i guess yeah yeah like fortune like self-deprecation and and like a goofball yeah and and you're kind of dry

dry wit and

yeah and and so it's been nice yeah what'd you guys learn about me well you have i didn't you you have such a curiosity uh about things and you're you're more you're harder on yourself than i would have ever guessed

um because uh i you when i met you you seem so confident and you are confident, but

as we've gotten to know you more, you like

riddled with yeah,

but I do feel like we've I've seen like a more mature side of you in the last two years.

It feels like you've sort of

gotten to know yourself better and are more comfortable in your skin.

And so you're starting to be more confident in as you should.

And I've enjoyed seeing a transformation in you where,

yeah, it just feels like you are coming into your own, which I really like seeing.

I love that.

Yeah.

I can, I can, um, I concur.

Um, I also, and I, I, this is not at all me thinking that marriage and kids or any of that kind of way of life is for everybody, but I have found it really interesting to see you, May,

who, I mean, let's be honest, we all know that you can triathlon all over the place,

if you know what I mean.

But it feels like in your curiosity and your different paths and journeys and dating and all of that, that

I think you've surprised yourself at what you're actually interested in and what what you might want in life.

And that, and I think is also still unfolding, which, of course, it's unfolding for all of us.

But

it's been really an interesting thing to watch with you.

And also,

Stephanie and I were talking the other day about this side of you.

I guess it goes into the curiosity category, but that you really

are

an artist that is

creating and

writing and searching, and

you, you just,

but it's, it's

so nice, but you know, this is a business where people can just start churning things out just for the sake of churning things out.

And, and of course, you're churning things out, but you do seem to be thoughtful and doing it for artistic reasons, and that you have so much say and um and and express and it comes through in you know writing tv shows or improv or comedy or music now and um that's so nice that is actually kind of a recent like i i feel like really in the in the past year i've been like

feeling not as constrained by like

what medium it takes and and and being like, yeah, I'll try doing a painting like I and finding it really rewarding.

Yeah, Yeah, that's yeah, that's, that's the other thing is that your, your paintings that you've been doing, it's, it, there's so many different ways that you're expressing yourself.

And, um, and I just, yeah, I wouldn't have, I wouldn't have guessed.

And then I'm also always intrigued by your, um,

how you just blow to shreds what people might expect from somebody who looks like you or presents in whatever way.

And you, you just have,

it is, it's a confidence and a security in your body and your feelings and attractions.

And that's another way of expressing yourself.

That's,

that's, it's all, it's, it's you and it's, it's, it's really an interesting

side of you.

We can end the episode here.

Our little cowboys.

That's growing up.

That is so nice.

That is so nice.

But

you can so easily tell yourself stories about who you are, especially if in our jobs, like we're, we're narrativizing our own identity so much.

And then people are then further boiling it down to write about you and your work and

putting stuff on you.

So, yeah, it's been, it's been nice to, uh, yeah, like I, I, I always was like, I'm bad at relationships, right?

Or I'm like, I'm not good at monogamy and things like that.

And now I'm like, nah, it's, yeah it's situational and and and yeah I can I can really show up for

for people sometimes

you can you can I think you uh I think you did get in the habit uh I saw early on with you of you telling yourself you could or couldn't do things yeah and uh believing that and I think you're getting away from that yeah which you should because you know you I think like Tig said you are surprising yourself

oh love it yeah I mean, it's, it's really, really cool.

I had a friend.

I mean, I guess I still consider her a friend.

I just haven't seen her probably in decades, but she was very similar in that, like,

man,

she could write any type.

She, she, I remember she put out an album of

instrumental

surf punk chardet covers.

What?

Yeah.

Like she was just, she was so, and she would write plays and musicals.

She's in like a heavy metal goth band now.

She, she's just, she, she has so much to express, and it's just pouring out of her.

And I wonder if you should meet her.

But anyway.

But also trying not to get hung up on like what will sell or what do people want from me next, but like, what do, what do I actually feel called to write?

Or yeah, that's so cool.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You, but you knew Fortune better than you knew me before probably so what surprised you about about old fortune marie i mean i guess i did but i mean you know i feel like we were in each other's orbits very loosely for a decade or more 15 10 15 years something but it was really i mean i could say I actually feel like I maybe knew you better because you were

working with Stephanie, you know, doing those shows at the, you know, doing improv together.

And so there were, I feel like it was almost an even amount of knowledge of each other.

And,

but yeah, I think with Fortune, what

has really surprised me is the

gosh, here this

is.

No, I'm not going to cry.

I'm not going to cry.

It's not that kind of thing at all.

It's more like,

no, no, it's more on the the heels of like, yeah, like when you were describing yourself as a goofball, you have such, you are a very business-minded person.

And this might just be the person in me that's not very educated, but I'm always like, gosh, Fortune,

Fortune went to school.

Fortune knows stuff.

And

not that I thought that you were like some dumbass,

but you can bring things to a very serious, grounded conversation, whether it's,

I mean, it's not like we sit around and we talk seriously about history, but I feel like you have that wealth of knowledge as much as you,

but also an understanding I have of you, of your upbringing and how you, you know, the instability in your family that you wanted to write for yourself.

And I think that's what's so

just so fascinating about getting to know people and like how

just when you understand people better and you're like, oh, they're not actually who I thought they were.

And then also seeing you right now,

I did not,

and I hope it's not offensive, but I did not see you

rising up from the ashes in the way that you have.

And it's really

remarkable.

And it does give me chills right now because you have been dealt a heavy load and a hard load.

And

I just, I'm like, I'm pretty floored.

I'm pretty floored.

And excited.

Oh, thanks.

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I'm floored and I'm excited

because, you know, there's so many.

Are you familiar with, aside from like the obvious like stoicism, you know, like that idea of that theory of stoicism?

Like it's something that I

try to follow.

And it's not to be misunderstood as to be you're just stoic and that you don't have feelings, but it's like you have control over how you're going to handle what's handed to you.

You can make a decision

how this is going to go.

Yeah.

And I feel like you have

really

shown that.

Oh, thank you.

The rivers run deep

with all of us.

And you're right.

Like you, you meet someone and you meet them where they're at in the moment.

And then

you really can only know someone when you understand where they came from and their childhood and their teens.

And it's, it's rare to have two years of talking about that stuff with, you know, in concentrated amounts of time.

And you're talking about it on a podcast, but then you're also having a side conversation or, you know, and it's like, hey, this is happening, or hey,

you know, here's what's up.

And how's this, how are we going to deal with this?

And how are we going to handle this?

And, and, um,

and you know, if I can just loop Thomas into this as well, I've known Thomas for a decade, and man, have I seen this guy grow and change.

And I stand by the fact that he is by far the best,

option as a husband or father.

But I, and not that he has kids, but I just, you know, and producer and just keeping it together and like championing us.

And yeah, yeah.

One of my, and I,

I've told this many times, and maybe I've told it on this podcast, or I don't know.

But one of my favorite Thomas moments was when I, and I'm sure Thomas is tired of me telling this story, but it really does make him look so cool because he is.

But I was being interviewed by

a TV show

on a stage after a show.

They came in town, set up a lighting situation, cameras, everything, legit,

legit interview.

And they started asking me questions

about

something

that was not at all what I signed up for in this interview.

And I said, Oh, I'm not wanting to talk about this or that person or whatever.

And I just kind of moved on.

And they were like, Well, but why don't you?

Why?

And it was like a real gotcha kind of moment where they weren't letting me out.

And Thomas was my assistant at the time.

And he

walked in front of the camera and he went, This interview is over.

What?

I did not ask him to do it.

He took total, like, he he took charge and pulled the microphone off and he was like, we're leaving.

And I just looked back at him and I was like, nicely done.

That's so hyped.

Oh my God.

I was so blown away.

And that's this weird curveball in Thomas where it's like, he's absolutely a.

a decent, solid dude, but here is the boundary.

Yeah.

You know?

Yeah, yeah.

And that was fun to find out.

And the protectiveness there.

That's so nice.

Yeah, thank you.

Would you do that?

Yeah, would you do that for me and fortune?

Absolutely.

Anytime this podcast gets out of hand, I'll snap in and stop it.

Yeah, this podcast is over.

We can't not mention you, Tig.

Obviously,

there's so many wonderful qualities.

Not that this surprised me, but I so have appreciated the wisdom that you impart

and not only on the podcast, but in real life.

I think, especially in this last year, you know, going through the different things that I've gone through personally, I've

had some really great private conversations with you on the phone or on text where you are just a great friend and really show up and you don't stop at just like,

you know, it'll be okay.

You like give really

amazing advice and

check out this book.

I learned this in my experience.

I did, you know, just like really thoughtful, meaningful

conversations with you that I've come to really appreciate and that has helped me a lot.

So,

yeah, you just really show up for people.

And,

and on the podcast, you impart some really great wisdom.

And I know a lot of that comes from a lot of the hard things that you've gone through and coming out the other end of that and seeing you

appreciate life.

I've not seen anyone

have such

genuine appreciation for what you have.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Thank you.

I really, there are so many things about your life that I want to emulate or find myself unconsciously like.

putting on my vision board and uh

yeah both of you like me your heroes you're both the best I'm crying.

I can't help it.

It's so, it's all so nice to hear, but it's also equally as nice to say.

And

I do appreciate my life.

And you can kind of,

I think it's human nature to think that you appreciate it.

And you've got a handle on, oh, man, did I learn my lesson?

And then life gets going and you completely forget that lesson.

And

I do that time and time again.

But i'm very thankful that i have a well to go back to and straighten myself out and be like man i remember what it was like begging begging to live through a moment or begging please i just want to have a kid you know and um

and um

or or even just to find a partner and you know in those moments i always say to stephanie i'm like i am crazy about you 99 of the time, but 1% of the time, I cannot stand you.

And she's like, same.

But

I do.

I appreciate my life.

And I,

but I actually am

also in a point in my life where I feel like I need more guidance.

to be even more appreciative because there are things that I cannot believe get on my nerves or that I dread doing.

And I'm like, what are you talking about?

You are the luckiest person alive and you need to get it together.

You know what I mean?

Like

human nature.

I know it is, but like, I really want to focus more energy on,

I guess, gratitude.

Because I am grateful, but I would like a heavier dose.

Yeah.

Heavier dose.

You're right.

It's so so nice to say this stuff and

what in in your regular friendships it's so rare that you like are like these are all the things I love about you and are and I'm grateful for I want to I want to do this with all my friends they'll be like oh god

stuff and you

know

I remember when um

my stepfather who I think I've talked about how talk about stoic in the way of being, you know, just like a robot.

But when my mother passed away, I remember him making a toast.

We had like all of her old friends and our old neighbors.

And my brother and I had our childhood friends over and our families and stuff.

And, and my stepfather was like,

this is what she would have wanted when she was alive.

And I never did that for her.

And I regret it.

And, and it was such a moment where I thought, yeah,

like you should write that letter you should tell your friend that thing you should you should

have a surprise party for somebody for no reason you know what i mean like and just feel like god i love you you know yeah and those are fun little things to um to remind yourself to do yeah and and i really felt it when my stepfather was making a toast to my mother you know yeah yeah

i'm feeling very grateful at the moment because i i don't know if you were wondering where i am but i'm in my ex-fiancé's apartment in toronto i had nowhere to record i can't i'm at my parents' house and i can't like try to be funny audibly in a room with that they'd be like listening and being like

and so i reached out and she's she's out of town and she told me where the key was and it's just i'm so grateful for it like And it's so nice to be around objects I remember from when we were together.

I love an object and like photographs.

And

yeah, so I'm grateful for that relationship and

with Lindsay.

And yeah,

I'm not snooping.

I'm not going to snoop.

All right.

Are you typically a snooper?

Well, you know, you're curious.

I think that's a yes.

I mean, it goes back to your curiosity.

It's my innate curiosity.

Your innate curiosity.

Do a little peekaboo in her

inner drawers, so to speak.

Yes.

You know, see what's going on with her, with her current relationship.

Is she home right now?

No, she's up in Prince Edward County.

Like, they, they, her and her partner live most of the time up in the countryside, but do you like her partner?

Oh my god, yeah, the best, yeah.

And this person was at our Toronto show, right?

Oh, yeah, yes, I read, yeah, Lindsay's part, they both were, and Lindsay's partner asked a question at the live show, yes, yes, and they're just gems, both of them.

Yeah, oh, that's nice.

Yeah, It's good that y'all are friends.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Oh, look at us.

What a moment of sharing.

Sharing is caring.

Yes.

100 episodes in.

I guess we have done 101 if somebody's going to start crunching numbers because Thomas did put together one episode that was all of our, what was it, the greatest hits?

Yeah.

And then also we did one where when we didn't know the format of the podcast yet, we did one

with two things.

Yeah, we did a couple.

One with Brett Goldstein as a guest.

And Otsuko.

Yeah, one with Otsco.

Do we still have those recorded?

Yeah, they're somewhere.

Maybe those will get released one day.

Then we were like, oh my God, it's a nightmare just to schedule us.

If we then add another busy person to this, we will not get anything done.

That's correct.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

So thank God we wanted to pivot.

Hog more of the air time.

Yeah, we don't want no guests.

Get out of here.

We got feelings to share.

Yeah, I feel like it works nicely.

It does.

Our show.

I love all the sharing.

I just turned 45.

I know it's hard to believe because I wear a lot of creams.

And you use your depuffer.

I use my depuffer, but it was a time, and probably because of what's going on in my life, where it just made me very introspective and just thinking about a lot.

But

I am of the opinion of like, you think nice things about people or you appreciate something about someone, like definitely tell them.

And with my mom being sick, that definitely hits home even more.

Like you're saying, Tig, about your stepdad having regrets.

That's the last thing I want.

It's just like, I wish I had said something to somebody or.

did something differently.

I just want to, I want to move forward deliberately and not, not so out to lunch.

You know, there's been times where I've just worked so much where I've just been a little out to lunch and I don't want that I want to be very present and

tell people my life things that you know are important and meaningful and not just and not shy away from stuff yeah yeah yeah do you you in the past have had a tendency to like just keep that stuff private and

I just went through a period of time where I was just working so much I just wasn't just this like i don't know why i just was like threw myself into that and just was kind of coasting a bit where i wasn't i wasn't you know connecting with friends like i should and um just wasn't taking the time to to appreciate some of the smaller things in life and um like sitting on a bench like sitting on a bench i wasn't sitting on benches yeah and i just want to be more cognizant of uh

i i don't want to be i don't want to be a robot i don't want to be just like

next show, like

I got to write this, I got to do this.

I don't, I, I don't want that.

Yeah, that's like that, I think I told you, and I've probably mentioned it on the podcast, um,

but um,

I just realized I was gone filming, I was touring,

and I was just like, yeah, I'm working, making money, sending it home, but it's like, I want to be home with

my family doing the activities that they're doing.

I want to be, I want to go play tennis.

Yeah.

I want to go, yeah, I want to go, I want to be there at the baseball game.

I want to be everywhere with them.

And, and I came up with like a

schedule of all, you know, podcasting,

Star Trek, and touring that is really scaled down that keeps me working, but keeps me mostly in my life.

And it's, it's,

I'm so proud of it.

I can't even tell you.

I'm so proud to have those things in motion and, but not ruling my life.

You know, I feel like I'm still in my like hustler era.

Like I still have this scarcity mentality of saying yes to things, but I'm getting better at it.

And, and

I'm also, I'm like, I, in my last relationship, I was like, immediately was like, oh, no, I'm happy to just cancel everything and sit in this house.

So I know I have that in me too.

So, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But, yeah.

People used to ask, like, oh, what's your, you know, work-life balance?

How do you do that?

I'd be like, you know, I'm trying to do this.

I'm trying to do it.

And then I realized like, I am lying.

Yeah.

Like, I'm not, it wasn't that I was like purposefully lying.

It was that I was lying to myself.

It was, I had made no

conscious decisions to shift my life in any way.

And it wasn't like I was never home because I would certainly have the ability to stay home for weeks or months at a time.

But

I wasn't, I just wasn't really, really making the decisions that would

that would

get the work-life balance in order.

And I'm anyway, I'm just like, I'm just so excited.

like yeah that's awesome yeah i'm really really happy about it imagine if this was the first episode of the pod someone listened to be like okay well they're really emote they really

deep yeah

okay they like each other

I'm Peter Sagal.

NPR is very serious, mostly.

It treats newsmakers with all due respect, almost all the time.

It brings you the most important information about the issues that really matter usually and it never asks famous people about things they don't know anything about except once in a while join us for the great exception listen to wait wait don't tell me the news quiz from npr

we we do have a question this week

and yes and um you know i'll give credit to thomas he was like we had sarah the first go-round should we should we bring her back on on the hundredth episode because she really kicked us off in a solid direction.

A huge way.

I mean, that episode is so ridiculous.

It's insane.

It's so great.

And it's just so perfect.

Yeah.

Because we do love getting ridiculous questions and earnest ones.

And Sarah, man,

she walks that line really well.

Yes, she does.

She does.

Have you seen it?

Her new special is amazing.

Oh, it's so good.

Yes.

Yeah.

She is nothing but silly and and nothing but like, she's so smart.

She's just.

I like seeing her out and about in the comedy world, too.

It's like you see her and you're just like start smiling.

Always the best, yeah.

Yeah.

Well, let's hear

Sarah Silverman once again asking today's question for the hundredth episode.

Hey, handsome.

It's me.

It's Sarah Silverman.

I just wanted to say congratulations on your first hundred Eps.

That's short for episodes.

I'm cool.

Also, I have another question.

And my question is, why?

Why?

Wow.

That could apply to so many things.

But I really relate to that feeling that like,

you?

Oh, why are we here?

Why, why are we, what is this?

What's happening?

Stephanie told me that the other day, Finn goes,

I'm so sick of not knowing things.

And she was like, What do you mean?

He was like, Why are we here?

Why is there a son?

Oh my gosh.

Why is there, I just want to know.

Oh, my God.

I felt that panic my whole childhood and teens.

And like,

I really, I mean, was it, was it Finn who wrote that song?

No, that was Max.

There was no one knows, we don't know why the world was born.

Oh, no, we don't know why we were born.

Yeah.

Um,

how, how does the world work?

We don't know how the world works.

It was the sun rises west, the sun goes down east,

which is profound.

And then we don't know how the world works.

Yeah.

Oh, man.

But no, I really relate to that.

I, I mean, I, I mean, I know it's bad because it uses water, but I talk to ChatGPT quite a bit and I often ask it, like, what the hell is going on?

And like,

are we in a simulation?

Are we,

what's going on?

Do you want to hear what chat?

Well, I just googled why is the world the way it is.

You want to hear what it says?

Well, yeah, but you're destroying the world a little bit by asking, but go on.

I know.

Well, that's part of this duality we live in.

Like,

how do we live in the world and participate in it when it's such a mess and all the systems are so damaging?

Okay, so it says,

The world is the way it is due to a combination of natural processes, human actions, and the inherent nature of reality.

From the formation of the earth and the laws of physics to the development of cultures and individual choices, a complex interplay of factors shapes our world.

That's, I mean, did that satiate your question?

No.

Yeah, it just seems like

a lot of just non- It sounds like a robot answered you.

To be honest.

100%.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then it,

I don't know, you can put on different lenses and see the world in different ways.

And at the moment, it really feels overwhelmingly negative, like, worldwise.

Our capacity for.

We don't know how the world

works.

Yes.

We don't know

why we were born.

You know what my mom said, though?

We don't know if we were born.

That was my favorite line.

We don't know if we were born.

Yes.

Because, yeah, we don't really have any evidence outside of our own minds that any, like when you close your eyes, everything could not be there.

We don't.

But my mom, one time, because I was like, God, it's just, there's so much suffering.

You're just born, you're immediately suffering.

And, and my mom was like, but we don't know what the alternative is.

Like,

being is better than not being, as far as we know.

And I was like, that's true.

I guess I'd rather be than not be.

But that's a good point.

Yeah.

I don't dig too deep into all these kind of questions.

You don't?

No.

Why?

Because you know it would drive you nuts.

I just that some things you can't be answered, so I don't drive myself crazy trying to figure it out.

Right.

And maybe that's a little, you know, uh, turning a blind.

Not not to big important things, but just these like more

philosophical questions.

I don't dig too deep into that.

Right.

Yeah, you got to like let those questions sit loosely on your shoulder.

Because really, you got to get up and have breakfast and have a shower and live your life.

When I was a kid, and I've probably mentioned this before, but like, I used to

really,

really think that if I grabbed a pack of smokes, headed off into the woods, and sat on like a little rock, like a you know, boulder, I could really figure out the answer to yeah, like Siddhartha, like the Buddha's, he sat under the lotus tree.

And yeah, I really thought I was going to come up with like

the answer to how the world works and why we're here and what this is all about, but I never did, unfortunately.

But I have to say, one of my big whys

that's going on for me right now is,

and

I guess the answer to my big why

would be going directly to specific people and sitting down and asking them why.

But I've had a handful of friends that have really veered off from what I thought

was

similar thinking

socially, politically, and they've really veered off.

And I think part of my why

is

also, why didn't you just

share that you were heading off in a different direction?

Like, why?

Because everybody is kind of left wondering, why?

What happened?

Like, what?

Why?

It goes back to the why.

And it could be

a different feeling if somebody was like, hey, this is kind of weird, but I didn't feel this way before.

And here's what's something in me has really shifted.

And not that I'd be all for that, but it would be more understandable.

Yeah.

You know, you would think that they, if, if their convictions had really changed and you're their friend, you'd think that they wouldn't.

They'd want to share that.

And they'd say, hey, I think you got it wrong and come with me.

Like, but they don't.

Do you think they're aware that they've shifted so much?

And

Yes, I do.

Okay.

Yes, I do.

I was in

Nantucket.

I was having my brunch

at the hotel restaurant or whatever.

And it was just one other table next to me.

And I didn't have my phone with me or anything.

So I was just listening to their conversations.

And it was like a cartoon of like, they went through everything from like, Trans people are bad, like, you know, women are dumb, like immigration, like they went went through everything.

And they were just, they were getting revved up.

It was this,

like three couples,

sort of older couples.

And they were, but I was like, what's going on here?

Cause they were really enjoying,

they were fueling each other and they were, but they were really connecting over it and being like, God, it's hard.

It's so hard.

They were like, they, them, like, it doesn't make sense.

God, it's just, it's hard.

It's just hard.

And they were like, and I was like, where is this coming from?

Because I could feel their like panic or fear.

And I can't wild.

Cause it's on, like,

in what way does that affect them at all?

Completely, yeah.

And they always, and you can always hear them be like, oh, yeah, it doesn't make sense.

You know, if someone called me a day, I'd tell them where they could stick it.

And it's like, you just did it.

You just said they.

But they

then, yeah, I felt like that they were finding community over it too.

And so I guess it is just like these things come in waves and cycles.

And like the sense, maybe it's the same existential fear that we're all feeling, and that just there's people's solution is just to build up their walls and grab what's theirs.

And

you know what I mean?

Yeah, I mean, because it is true.

It's like, if I had a major shift in the way I was going about my life, and of course, people have shifts, and you change the way you're thinking, and you change, I mean, even down to comedy.

Like, look at Sarah Silverman.

I mean, she, her material has shifted so much over the years, you know, where she's even had moments of saying, like,

oh, hey, this didn't age well.

And, um, and, but she's keeping you in conversation.

Like, oh, I've learned this, I've changed, I've gone in this direction, or, oh, I said this the wrong way, or I apologize, or I do it better now, or I'm, you know, like she, she really keeps you in conversation.

Yeah.

And, and then there are, like I said, if I made a massive shift and did not fill in anybody

on where this came from and I just went with it so far away from

where

I was planted with the people I was growing with,

you know, and again, it's like it's a, it's, it's okay to change and it's okay to

to say that you have different ideas or that, know, but just like, why?

But that's where what?

Like, give us some more information.

Stay in conversation.

I know, because

the fact that it, like, Sarah's series, I Love You, America, was,

she was really talking to people.

And

it's like,

I know the work shouldn't fall on us to always build bridges.

But

often when you do engage in conversations with people who, who yeah whose thoughts on human rights and things like are so different from your own they do come around they haven't but then there are like I'm saying people that oh yeah that thought were on that side of things and then they that you see them drifting away and with no

they they're not staying in conversation.

I would I would want to explain myself if I was seeing the light I thought yeah that was so

different

from the world I was in.

I guess I can compare it to veganism if you want like a comparison.

It's like,

I saw the light.

You can think I'm weird.

You cannot follow what I'm doing, but I'm going to talk you through how I got here.

And I know it's very different, but I'm just, I'm saying that people make massive shifts and just, but just explain what, what happened?

Like, what,

where is this coming from?

And, and what sent you in that direction?

Yeah, because the fact that

people are reluctant to do that makes it seem like there is some awareness somewhere or shame about it.

Shame.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That they are aware that

they are

punching down or,

you know.

Yes, if you slither away quietly.

There is shame.

There's shame.

There is shame.

There is shame.

If you are slithering away, there is shame.

Well, it's the same like when people break up and they can't talk to you about it.

Or like they, or if you've ever been ghosted or broken up with, where it's just like, this isn't working.

It's often they

can't talk about it because they know

that it.

Yeah, that it is.

Well, yeah, I had an experience with somebody recently where there was some weirdness in the air.

And I was like, I'm going to go up and just say, hey,

there's some stuff going on, obviously.

Would love to talk to you about it.

And she was kind of defensive and weird.

And

we were in this like group situation.

And she avoided me the rest of the time.

And I thought, if somebody came up to me and said, I'd like to talk to you, I would follow back up with that.

I would be like, hey, so what is it that's going on?

You know, what was that?

I would not slither away.

I think not everybody's capable of the emotional level of, you know, communication.

Yeah, I just, I walked away from that going,

man,

like,

why,

why on earth would you slither away and avoid me if there wasn't any shame in there?

And I guess part of it, like,

I think I take responsibility too for sometimes the

you have to make an

which I think you do, Take, but in general, like we have to make it an environment where it's safe to ask questions and safe for people to express themselves, you know, and not feel like they're going to immediately get called, you know, a bigot because they don't understand they, them, you know, like we gotta

be a people, Grace.

Yeah, totally.

Oh my God, yeah.

Like, in this particular conversation, I truly went up.

We were like kind of giving each other awkward smiles, like, hi, because there was obviously something to discuss and then that's when I was like hey so I'd love to talk to you about the

you know elephant in the room yeah and

slither slither slither

so anyway

that all goes back to why

why

stop slithering There's been a lot of whys, I think, since COVID times.

So much.

I was thinking about that today, just like

this pre and post COVID world things just so significantly shifted yeah they really did and it would have been nice if it was a moment where that would have you not unified us as human beings and it does feel like people just went to their little caves and went online and got radicalized a little bit sometimes.

Got into podcasts.

Just started taking in podcasts and

stopped talking to people.

But keep on doing that keep supporting the show yeah glad you listen and um sarah does not have a follow-up um answer when i um asked her no i was hoping she she doesn't have answers for us she said that it's just it's like it's an open-ended why it's for everything and anything

which i think is is perfect that works very timely and i will say i really admire that about sarah her fluidity in terms of her yeah, and transparency about her journey as a person.

I hope I do that.

I hope, yeah, I just think we should all aspire to just, as we get older, because no doubt, younger generations, there are going to be things that I do not understand or that I immediately feel defensive about.

There's all kinds of things probably now.

And

yeah, we got to keep talking to young people and keep learning and talking to people.

Yeah.

And we got to keep being silly at at times too.

Oh, for fuck's sake, it's all

levity because we're going to have a lot of whys and a lot of

and a lot of frustrations and

keeping it, you know, obviously

these things are important and you got to take them seriously, but also taking time to let the air out of the tires for a minute.

Oh, my gosh.

1 million percent.

People are, I hear from people all the time how thankful they are for just like a break from the insanity of life and the silliness and the singing and the Fortune Marie and the Mayfax and all of it.

It's like, you know, there's obviously plenty of news stations you can go and drain your energy into, but like we'll touch on things from time to time.

But in general, you know, this is this is a nice place for us to go.

This is where you hear about being a pineapple apart.

That's right.

I really for my own homebrew cowboys.

Appreciate it.

Yeah.

Yeah, ghost.

Yeah, ghost.

Hanties, galore, checking out those gams.

Motorboating.

Motorboating, my friends.

Cooters.

Cooters, galore.

Cooters and hooters.

Cooters and hooters and pooters.

You need to start your own.

Or maybe we could, as a trio, is start cooters and hooters.

Cooters and hooters.

Put it on the list.

Well, yeah, put that on the list.

We haven't.

You know what?

I was watching a documentary about the Beach Boys with my mom last night, and my mom goes, God, their harmonies are amazing.

And then out of nowhere, she doesn't listen to the pod.

Out of nowhere, she goes, you know, you and Tig and Fortune should do harmonies, like do a do like a barbershop quartet.

And I went, have you heard our theme song?

And she was like, no.

So I went on YouTube and I played the theme song.

And she was like, oh, wow.

So that's one thing we've checked off the list.

Yeah.

We could be a,

what's a three-person triad.

A triad?

All right.

Triathlon.

A triathlon.

That's a long-term

thruple.

Is a triathlon.

A triathlon.

Yeah, yeah.

That's like if you really, on your deathbed, you're holding hands with two people.

You did a triathlon.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

Well, that was a really

special episode.

It was.

So full of emotion, so introspective, lots of philosophical wonderings.

And a lot of why?

Why?

Why?

Stay in conversation.

Yeah.

So was our 100 episodes.

Congratulations, you guys.

Yeah, congrats.

Thank you, Mr.

Thomas, for steering the ship.

Yeah, thank you for everyone that's listening to this.

Thank you.

Awesome pod because we get as much joy doing it it as you guys have told us you get from listening to it.

We really do.

And thank you guys for me.

It's a privilege to produce this show.

And I feel like this,

you know, the podcast spreads so much joy and to participate in that is really meaningful for me.

So thank you all.

So why do we do this podcast?

Oh, to spread joy.

Handsome joy.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, speaking of spreading handsome joy, I'm going to tell you where I'm spreading my handsome joy, if you don't mind.

Please.

West Hampton Beach Performing Arts Center in West Hampton Beach, New York, August 17th.

Provincetown Town Hall in P-Town, Massachusetts, August 23rd.

Beau Rivage Resort and Casino, Biloxi, Mississippi, September 27th.

Also go to Tignotaro.com to see when I'm working out my new material at Largo, Dynasty Typewriter, and Comedy Bar bouncing back and forth between Toronto and Los Angeles.

What do you have going on, my friends?

I got nothing live for a little while.

So, yeah, you can listen to my music, or I'm gearing up to launch something very cool.

I'll probably talk about it a bunch more, but I'm going to launch like a

I do these animal paintings.

I'm launching an online store selling the animal paintings, and 100% of the proceeds go to charity, and I'm excited about that.

That'll be launching in the next week or two, I think.

So stay tuned.

That's because you can't stop expressing yourself.

Can't stop, won't stop.

Don't stop.

Can stop, won't stop.

Can stop, won't stop, yeah.

What about you, Fortune?

I'm going to Iceland soon, August 8th in Reykjavik.

I'm doing a show there for their pride.

So if you live in Iceland, check that out.

And then San Antonio and Houston, Norfolk, and Richmond, and D.C.,

Burlington, Vermont, Atlanta, Cincinnati, Chicago, Salt Lake City,

FortunePeamster.com for those

tickets.

Well, there you have it.

Please,

should we say share this episode?

Thank you.

Maybe not this one.

As the first episode that you shared with us.

Share your favorite Sarah Silverman's first episode with us.

Yes, yes, yes.

Yes, where she asks about cleaning undercarriages.

Yes, that's right.

Solid episode.

There's so many great ones.

Share one with a friend or family member and bring them on into the handsome fold.

And keep chatting to each other on the Facebook page, the Reddit page.

Keep sending us questions for the pretty little episodes.

And we love to hear from you.

Get your merch.

Look at this fun, handsome shirt right here.

Look at that.

You can see that on YouTube.

The coolest merch in the biz.

Head on over to YouTube and see handsome Fortune Face in a handsome t-shirt.

Well, you guys are awesome.

What a joy and treat to do this with you.

Titto.

Yes, it is.

Kisses.

Happy 100th.

You both look

150.

Happy 100.

Alrighty.

Well, until the next time.

Keep it handsome.

Keep it handsome.

Handsome.

Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tignotaro, and Fortune Feemster.

The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willette.

Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod.

What a podcast!

What a podcast!

What a podcast!

That was a head gum podcast.

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