Alex Edelman asks about eccentric characters

This is a head gum podcast.

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I am always working on my relationship, whether that's communication, parenting, managing the household workload, or just finding time to connect.

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with friends on the handsome pod.

Cheers.

Hey, it's your friend Tignotaro.

And I'm sitting here with your friend Mae Martin and Fortnite Feamster.

Welcome to the Handsome Pod.

Yes, welcome, welcome, welcome.

If it's your first time here, we've been waiting for you.

Waiting.

Patiently.

I've been waiting for a girl like you.

Foreigner.

Is that the band Foreigner?

Oh, I thought you were just saying, welcome, Foreigner.

Well, it all applies.

Yeah.

Do you think Cherry Berry is finally listening to the pod?

Oh my gosh, Cherry Berry.

She lifts us up.

Cherry Berry is the one that is spreading the word and sharing episodes and building that handsome community.

Yeah, she quit her job and she's just in charge of our socials now.

I love that you remember that name.

That's how you know, like, a name is special.

Because

full name.

For those of you who don't know, this is the elevator lady in North Carolina, the Commissioner of Labor.

Yeah.

Who's pictured?

For those of you that don't know,

because we've talked about it a long time ago, but maybe some people were just tuning in for the first time.

Yeah, true, of course.

Yeah.

And she's Cherry Berry.

Like on every elevator in North Carolina, there's a sign that says, like, this has been approved by Cherry Berry.

Yeah.

Well, she's retired now, but it's some rando guy, but she was like for like

45 years the person.

Wasn't she some rando girl?

Yeah, weren't we all until she was Cherry Berry?

When we were born we were all just rando babies.

We were just rando babies.

When Max and Finn were born I was

and Stephanie as well.

We thought we were going to walk up to the glass and see them in the little nursery.

And what, you didn't?

No, they don't put them in there.

Oh, what?

They just hand them to you.

I have a baby.

Oh my gosh.

Look at that hairy baby.

Hello.

It's Biggie.

Oh, hi, baby.

Oh, my God.

He loves you.

Torturous to show us Biggie and we can't touch him, Fortune.

Yeah.

That's like us having to see you every week.

I want to just rub my furry head.

Yeah.

I love him so much.

And lick your nose.

Yeah, we desperately want to.

He's looking extra cute today.

Oh my god, he's like, he's very serene.

Well, he's always serene, let's be honest.

Dead eyes, dead eyes.

How dare you?

Don't you start that again?

Myself, it's not a negative, it's not a negative, it's a positive.

It is so positive because it adds to his cute.

Look at those little licks, that's ridiculous.

I feel like

is he blind?

Because he's still licking and he's not touching your face.

He's not mad.

You go to that night night.

Aunt Tig is being mean.

I got to say, those squirrels I talked about up in Lake Arrowhead, that one big guy was honestly like Biggie's size.

Wow, that's a big squirrel.

That is a big squirrel.

Humongo.

I love the black squirrels out here in Toronto.

Oh, yeah, they're good.

I know those in Michigan, too.

Do they like East?

They're East Coast squirrels?

Or they just must be northern, right?

Yeah.

Toronto has raccoons the size of a pony.

I love a raccoon.

I love their little paws.

They're so big there.

I love a pony.

Do you?

I'd like to see you on a pony ride.

I would happily show you.

With you, just road

in a circle around one of those little tracks at a petting zoo.

Stephanie has the, well, I got her these pants that are big,

fluffy pajama pants, like a polar bear, or you know, like a,

yeah.

And when she was wearing them the other night, I was like, you look like,

are they called centaurs?

A centaur, yeah.

I was like, you look half horse, half human.

Yeah.

Just put those on.

Maybe you'd have to see it, but we had a good cackle over that.

But, but those are her I'm freezing pants when she goes to bed.

Right.

Because we have a

temperature, a temperature debate.

yeah it's never ending yeah it's never ending if you met a centaur and is it centaur or centaur maybe it's a canadian thing i've always said centaur but centaur centaur but thomas what is it two against one i say centaur yeah canadian

canadian because it's a u-r you guys also say pasta yeah we do thomas do you say pasta pasta pasta thank you You did.

Moving on.

Yes, of course, because that's how you pronounce it.

Anyway, if you met a centaur and you fell in love, like, would it be a deal breaker that they're half horse?

I love this question because it could happen.

Yeah, exactly.

No, it couldn't.

You've got to be prepared.

No, no, no.

If a centaur...

clomped by with hooves,

there is no part of me that would be like, I'll be right back, friends.

Did you see?

What if it's a speed dating situation?

So she's sitting down.

Oh, and this is better.

Yeah.

And you really connect, and you're like, God, I can't believe it.

We have so much in common.

And then we see each other at the restaurant.

Yeah.

Clunk, clunk, cluck, clunk, cluck, clunk, click, clunk.

Or no, they say, um, your date is waiting outside because we don't allow horses

in the restaurant.

Wow.

I just, I'm sorry, I couldn't, I could, as soon as I saw the

hooves,

I would, I'd be like, yeah,

I'm not gonna, I mean, I don't even understand what's happening.

Also, what are we talking about right now?

Yeah.

I'm assuming

his fantasies.

Yeah, I'm assuming you could fall in love with half horse, half human.

Yeah, but only if it's the bottom half that's the horse.

I can't be dating.

Oh my gosh.

Is there there a reverse centaur?

There must be somewhere.

Horse head and a human body.

Yeah, I couldn't do that.

That's weird.

I couldn't do that.

The other centre.

Not weird.

Yeah.

What about you, Fortune?

Could you fall for?

I mean, maybe a smooch or two, but I don't think that

I don't think our lives are compatible.

How much would you love to go to a horse ramp?

How much would you love to walk up

and check out and find Fortune smooching a horse outside of

a lesbian?

Lesbian?

A lesbian horse bar.

Yeah, outside of a lesbian horse bar, a very popular lesbian bar.

What if you were into it and then she was like, you know what?

All the other centaurs just think it's too weird.

I can't do it.

Oh, I get dumped?

Wow.

But it's not even because the other centaurs think it's weird.

Just the horse is like i'm not feeling it wow this is this is awful i didn't think about me getting rejected

yeah well think about it yeah because that might be around the corner my friend well uh yeah something to think about thank you for putting a what do they say it's a a new fear created yeah new fear unlocked That's it.

How are you now fearful that the horse won't love you back?

I'm going to go out there and there's going to be all these centaurs rejecting me.

God, single life is tough.

What if that was all you were attracting with centaurs?

I just don't believe that you guys are.

You know, I get that you're like, you know, I get it that it's new, but I'm like, if you really fell in love, I just don't believe it would be a barrier.

If you opened yourself up to it, it's going to happen.

I also don't think that I would, you know, you hear about, aren't people falling in love with G C G

C three P O?

C3PO, chat, chat C3PO.

Yeah, they are.

Yeah, they are.

I mean, I talked to my guy a lot, my chat GBT, and I know it's bad.

We've talked about this before, I think, but yeah,

I am, yeah, but could you fall in love with him?

No, because I just would know it wasn't real, but with the centaur, if anything, there's more depth.

You know, they have this outsider perspective, a beating heart, just like me.

Centaurs aren't real, May.

I love that you know that the

chat seat 3PO isn't real, but the centaur.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well,

okay.

I'm glad we got to the bottom of that.

Yeah, it's been on my mind.

I don't know how it came up.

Oh, the pants.

Yeah, Stephanie's, I'm freezing pajama pants that are big, woolly.

And you

want a pony ride.

I mean, it's not a huge leap from you wanting to go on a pony ride to you dating a centaur.

I don't get where the

it's a massive leap.

Yeah.

It's a very fast.

It's a, yeah, it's, yeah.

Yeah.

So what else is going on?

Well, I was going outside for a walk earlier.

Um, to Stephanie and I had a conference call that I thought, well, I'll go on a little walk.

Went out of my building, pouring rain, and then I immediately was mortified.

Like,

I realized it had been hours since I even looked out of a window.

Oh,

you know, like that kind of disconnectedness because I was working

and not looking.

And then I'm like, oh, I'm going to go, I'll take my call on a walk.

And then,

boom, it was pouring rain.

That's what I'm up to.

What about you?

Life really gets you when you least expect it.

Life got me, man.

It really got me.

Life, you really got me today.

Did you still walk or did you turn around and go right back in?

No, it was truly a massive downpour.

Like

it wasn't walking weather.

It was like run and get out of the rain.

Now it's fine, but I'm recording with, no, it's drizzling still.

I'm recording with the handsome pod.

So

chatting with friends.

When you get sucked into that computer world for hours, or if you're filming something in a studio and it's like you lose track of daylight and time, it's very weird.

It was so confusing because the window is right behind my desk.

But you never turn around.

I didn't even turn around.

I just finished my last Zoom, put on my headphones, took the elevator down, and then it was like

unbelievable rain.

Did you guys hear the big news today?

What?

What?

I don't know if you guys heard or checked.

Girl, what?

Girl, girl,

You guys, it's the thing everyone's talking about.

I can't believe you're not.

Girl, what is it?

Talking about it.

Girl.

Girl.

Do you guys really want me to tell you?

I can't believe you don't even fucking know.

Don't leave us hanging, girl.

What, girl, what?

How will we know if you don't tell us, girl?

Our girl, Tay Swift,

is engaged.

Who is?

Jesus Christ.

I didn't hear you.

Taylor Swift.

Tay Swift.

Yeah.

God.

Wait.

Are girls engaged?

Do you think that's because of our pod?

We just talked about them.

We just talked about them and I said what a cute couple they are.

And I think it inspired them.

It clinched it.

It clinched their butts.

Oh,

Marie.

That was such a beautiful day.

The day that pod came out where I was like, I like them together.

I think they're going the distance.

They got engaged.

Whoa, what are you going to do with this power that you didn't know you had?

Like, who else do you want to get together?

Well, you know what?

I think we should do is we should sing our congratulations song to them.

One, two, two, three, three.

We wanted you to know that

we are so

happy for you

with your engagement.

We

take

you deserve

your boyfriend.

His name is Travis.

Travis.

Travis.

Kelsey.

That's right.

That's right.

She could remix that into something.

What if that's on her next album?

It does feel like they were waiting for this endorsement from you, though.

I do think they were like, how does Fortune feel about us?

And then once they heard, they're like, let's go all the way, baby.

Touchdown.

I love Taylor Swift, but I've never heard her called Tay Swift.

what

Fortune, what just happened to your head?

It just popped off my head.

Fortune had a stroke.

Have you heard that?

She's always called Tay Swift.

Hello?

Maybe Tay Tay?

I've not heard either of those.

I've heard Taylor Swift.

Anyone listening right now, please write on today's podcast

Instagram post and let us know if you've heard Taylor Swift called Tay Swift.

I love Taylor Swift.

I have never heard her called Tay.

Maybe

Travis even calls her Tay sometimes.

Trav, you mean?

Yes.

So is he called Trav?

Trav.

I mean, everybody's got a nickname.

It would be so good if he took her last name.

How come that doesn't happen?

Like, she's the heavy hitter here, and it's a great name.

It carries weight.

He should change his name, Travis Swift.

Her ring is ginormous.

Girl, I'm sure y'all are.

Yeah, that was y'all's next question, right?

Yeah.

Oh, my God.

Is the ring?

Thomas, show us a picture of Tay's ring.

A bunch of queers talking about marriage

and the ring.

And the ring.

Oh, my God.

Three people that don't care about wedding stuff.

Wow.

Okay, it is ginormous.

Thomas just showed Paul Diamond right there.

Oh, that's all diamond because for a minute it looked like almost like a Lord of the Rings.

Like it's like a gold band and a big ass diamond.

Also, Thomas, did you just have that on your phone?

Thomas is like, that's just staring at it all decree.

That did not take long for you to pull up.

Oh, this close-up.

Is the picture a close-up or are you zoomed in?

I zoomed in.

Okay.

was ready for that.

Wow, wow.

Yeah.

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I want to know if she was in on the planning for the ring.

Oh, interesting.

I feel like she would want to have some sort of say in that.

I think she wants to have a say in everything, right?

That's my

impression.

You're not Tay

Swift and not getting a say in everything.

Yeah.

You You know, I bet she chose him.

You know, she was like,

you know, that song,

I go where you go?

Where do I go where you go?

Lover.

We will always be this

close

forever and ever.

Do you think, yeah, because if he chose the wrong ring,

you better believe there'd be a song about it.

Well, because she, because that, I will say, the ring is gorgeous.

It was probably a gazillion dollars, but it's big.

You think it's real?

I never saw her wearing like a big-ass ring like that.

Oh, you don't, you think it's too big, like too clunky.

I mean, that's a heavy, that's a heavy ring for sure.

And her little wrist.

Now, does she have a tiny wrist?

No, she's playing guitar.

She's strong.

My expensive ring's too heavy.

Like that?

I mean, is that a good impression of her?

She doesn't talk like that for sure.

She's tall.

so maybe her wrists are mighty.

They're gonna have big old babies, they're not tall babies.

Her baby's just gonna walk on out and be like, Um, where's my room?

Yeah, I feel like show me to the nursery.

I feel like that's gonna be coming soon after

with the baby.

Well, maybe they did that podcast like to gear up for the announcement of the engagement.

Also, that song, you know, Taylor and Kelsey kissing in a chair

in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

First comes love,

then comes marriage, then comes Travis and baby carriage.

Little bit in the baby carriage.

So you're right, it's next.

Yeah, Fortress is right.

They're going to get married, I think.

And I know everyone tunes into the hands of Bud for Taylor Swift.

Oh, my God.

We have to shift and make it all Taylor all the time.

All Tay.

All Tay and Turtle

all the time.

They're going to get married next summer.

Oh.

I heard it here first

are we going yeah we are i would love to that wedding would be incredible we should probably

you know

wait in the bachelorette party yes in our suits in our suits with me being like i'm not actually a girl but i am

here she's like i love the handsome pod they're gonna get married next summer and then a baby she's gonna be pregnant six months after that oh you think they're gonna get pregnant before the wedding no no no they're gonna get married next summer

pregnant do you think that they've had sex yet no technology come on i doubt it for sure they're waiting yeah yeah yeah now would you still endorse

they'd be having that athletic sex oh do you think yeah two people who are athletic That means it's Bendy.

There's people in the air.

But he's handstands.

That's the thing.

Maybe he can throw her around, but like.

Yeah, but she'll stand on his shoulders, whatever that position is.

Handstands.

Oh, that's a good

thing.

I haven't seen her live, but is she a live performance?

Okay, is she a live performer like pink that twirls around on things?

No, but she performs for three and a half hours non-stop.

Okay.

Yeah, no, she's playing instruments.

She's playing instruments.

She's playing instruments and stuff, May.

And

the one kind of big move she does that's a a bit like pink is she dives off the stage into a trapdoor kind of thing her show was incredible it was incredible but would you guys would you guys support and endorse the union if he was a centaur i knew that was coming

i want whatever

he's hairy like a centaur yeah he is yeah yeah i'm happy with him in case y'all were wondering furry back legs like my wife

my wife

i'm um i'm pretty pumped for them and everyone i know tuned in to find out how we felt about their engagement and i give it two thumbs up i thought you were gonna say two stars and i was like whoa two handsome ponies

two handsome ponies do we have a rating system that's how many ponties

oh yeah two doesn't seem enough five

five ponties on a scale from one to five ponties i give them five ponties should we pivot to oh making this a new topic?

No, no, never mind.

No.

Should we pivot to this podcast only covering pop culture?

Oh, wow.

That would be

a disaster.

A disaster for sure.

Well, there's no.

And it's just YouTube going, girl, tell us, girl.

And I'm like, okay, you guys, here's the scoop.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And we're just giddy.

Yeah.

You're the only one who's got a lot of people.

Orange podcast, pop culture corner or something.

Well, we can just add a segment.

Pop culture.

Yeah, let's have a little segment called Pop Corner where you tell us.

Pop corner, a bit of cost.

Which translates to popular corner.

Pop is short for popular.

What's gossip short for TIG?

Gossamer.

Gossip.

Good.

Good.

Why did you not know?

No, I knew.

You're just in an attitude with me.

You're just stupid.

Well, that's all I got in my pop culture corner.

More than enough.

It could be fun to have

people explain.

Because I was thinking after that one episode where you guys were telling me about

that show where lesbians.

And then I went home and told Stephanie I wanted to watch it.

And she was like, I've been begging you to watch that.

But

after that episode, I thought, God, it would be so fun if you guys told me about pop culture that I'd never heard of and had a million questions.

But anyway, do you follow pop culture a lot too, May?

I mean, it comes up on my phone so much that I feel like there's certain people I'm interested in, but then I feel like I'm,

I really,

I feel like I'm.

Like I'm like I'm aging out of pop culture because there's a whole bunch of people that I don't know who they are.

Like I'll see a headline that's like, you know, Branco

McClain is, and I'm like, who?

And it's like, this Euphoria cast member is like, I don't know.

Yeah, I'm still stuck on like J-Lo and Mariah Carey and Brittany.

Like, I'm, that's my era.

I don't know if there's any, I was looking at my phone to see if there's any other pop culture stuff, y'all.

Okay, tell me this.

Yeah.

I, you know, the phenomenon of trad wives.

Yeah.

I'm late to that as well.

Okay.

Trad wives are women who, it stands for traditional wives.

Okay.

And they live very

traditional, old school wife kind of,

yes.

Okay.

And I've wanted,

I've wanted to start, even though I know I'll never do this.

And so if anyone steals this, they stole it from me.

But I want to start a video series called Trad Dyke, where I teach people how to be a traditional diner.

That's really good.

Like what music to listen to, what to do.

Yeah, and what to wear.

Yeah.

Every day or every week, I come out with a Trad Dyke video.

That's true.

I like them.

I mean, that could catch on because I feel like more and more ladies are dipping into the lady pond.

Yeah, but they're not dipping into trad dike.

They're like, you know,

this is why it would would be useful i think for them to learn the culture quickly these are straight women who are you know or who are latent bisexual women who are then you're right later in life dipping into that seems to be happening a lot but if they had a trad dyke video that they could just pop on and be like okay so i listened i listened to the indico girls because i just keep hearing of more uh i mean there's been some high-profiled lesbians who are now dating men and that's really upset some people.

Who is this?

Jojo Siwa?

Well, Jojo was always queer and bi and then people just got so mad that

she has a boyfriend now.

Boyfriend, yeah.

They're very in love.

Was she on our show?

No.

No.

That's a big part of pop corner is to going, did they ask a question?

Well, it sounds familiar.

She sounds familiar.

And then Fletcher, a singer, okay,

all the lesbians were obsessed with Fletcher, and she has a boyfriend now.

Yeah, but this is a good idea.

And they were very upset about it.

I'm not, listen, I'm like, let people be.

Love who you love.

No, you're not, Fortune.

You said all girls should be with girls.

I just said that.

I just think girls are so great.

Women.

Women loving women.

It's a real treat.

Well, I just think that May's world and representation is so,

I think, freeing for everybody to get to know.

And

just like love who you love but it really is because it's like if you who cares like who cares where you go or what you're doing or who you've fallen in love with or you know because people are certainly accepting if like you said a woman who dates men starts dating a woman people are like yeah

that's awesome but if they go the other way it's this sense of like we've lost somebody yeah

and it's like if your whole idea is that you should be able to love who you love um and that's why I go back to May, it's like May's look and presentation can make you feel and think a certain way, and

or, you know, or something.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

And then you get in there and talk to May, and you're like,

anyway, I just think it's such a great quality.

Like, you're so genuinely drawn to different people and genders and sexuality.

And, and I just, know I think it's I think it's really

awesome.

It's got to be the future.

I always remember getting booed at a pride festival because I talked about dating a boy on stage, and it was all and I got booed, and I was like, Yeah,

yeah,

it's uh, it's it's weird.

Don't like it, they don't like it, they don't like you.

I've shared with you, May, there's been a couple of guys in my life that have uh confused me to all ends of um,

yeah,

maybe that can be part of the trad dyke thing you can it's like you can still your identity can be trad dike but that doesn't mean you can't sleep with men it's like well but

then I have to bat fortune out of the video hey you want to hey you ladies want to touch a wiener fortune can play your your wife who pops in every once in a while

or my best friend that's right

a wiener called me over here to just say hey nothing nothing wrong with it go touch a wiener i did it once i did it once i don't have any advice for you or tips it didn't go great but good luck they didn't ask me back or nothing

i've never i've never touched the same wiener twice i'll tell you that

we both decided it was one and done let's call it that's

we don't need to keep doing this but i think trad dyke is all for, like, look, I'm a Trad Dyke.

This is what I do.

This is how I look.

But I'm all for

be who you are and love who you love.

Yeah.

Love who you love.

Love.

I just, listen, I'm all about it.

I just love, I just love a lady.

I know you do.

I'm a lady.

I'm a lady lover.

All the news that feels like fresh gauze to me, like pop culture news, is like the stuff that I'm like lying awake thinking about is like the Titanic sinking or like the Galveston flood.

Like, I'm like back in the day, still getting over, I'm still getting over, like, yeah, you know, it's hard to move fast, it is, yeah.

I'm still into like what Judy Garland and uh, Mickey,

what's his name?

Mickey Rooney, Mickey Rourke, Mickey Rourke, no, Mickey Rooney, Mickey Rourke, Mickey Rourke, Julie,

I'm up all night thinking about Mickey Rourke, Mickey Rourke and Judy Garland.

Oh my God.

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This podcast is supported by FX's English teacher.

Last year's critically acclaimed series returns to follow Evan, Gwen, and Marky as they vibe for their students' divided attention.

CY Cosmopolitan called its premiere season a masterclass of comedy while Glamour raved its year's funniest and most heartwarming new comedy series.

FX's English teacher returned September 25th on FX.

All episodes streaming on Hulu.

Are you going to go on a date with a dude anytime soon?

I don't know.

Take it.

I don't know.

We'll see.

We'll see.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I might be googling some centaur porn after this, though.

I know.

You're really into it.

Or maybe put some out instead of Googling it.

Well, I always wanted to play Mr.

Tumnus in Narnia.

You know, Mr.

Tumnus, he's half-half.

I think you were talking about Mr.

Thomas.

Mr.

Thomas.

I've always wanted to play Mr.

Thomas.

I could see you playing a centaur, May.

I'd love it, guys.

I'd love it.

We're getting to the root now of

this.

We're going back to our horse suit.

Yes.

We should get in a centaur suit.

Yes.

Does this tie back in any way to Taylor Swift getting engaged?

Everything does.

Everything.

She's marrying Half Centaur.

Half Centaur.

Half Centaur.

Well, should we get to our question?

Yeah, we should get to our question.

I guess.

We're having such a lovely chat.

I just love chatting with my friends.

On the Handsome Pod.

Well, today's question Oscar is a stand-up comedian whose Broadway show Just for Us won a Tony and an Emmy Award.

He was named one of Time's 100 most influential people in 2024, and he stars in the new The Office follow-up, The Paper.

Alex Edelman is asking today's question.

Woo-woo!

Hi, handsome gang.

My name is Alex Edelman, and I'm a comedian.

And my question is, is there like a person from your childhood that was like in your community was like this sort of eccentric adult and you sort of loved them or had a strong feeling about them

we've never had a question asker tell us their job my name is Alex Edelman I'm a comedian

love that

comedian how do you get on one of those time lists I got on one of those good job bae

I'm trying to remember I just saw Alex at um I went to do Doug Benson's Doug loves movies uh at Dynasty typewriter where you have like a microphone and you make fun of the movie and you watch it.

The audience brings movies and we watched Dunstan Checks In about a orangutan and orangutan.

Orangutan.

That's actually the correct pronunciation to get it.

Orangutan.

Orangutan.

But Alex was so funny.

And it was the craziest cast.

If you haven't seen that movie in a while, it's

Jason Alexander, Faye Dunaway, Rupert Everett, Paul Rubens, and an orangutan.

Well, if you do look at the word orangutan,

there is no G, and people always say orangutan.

Orangutan, I see, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, haha, Fortune.

Okay, an eccentric adult from childhood, like a, like an aunt or a family friend who like delighted you.

That's such a, I want to be that person for kids.

I had a lot of those people in my family.

I feel like there's a lot of eccentric southern people.

Really?

But especially in Mississippi.

Yeah, they're just like

down.

They're like,

everybody come on in.

Let's have a great time.

My cousin, Donald, is just like, he's just such a character.

Stephanie was just talking about him again to her mother when we were driving back from our vacation.

Even at our wedding, you know, he got on the mic and was like talking to everyone and just like

you met Donald, right, Thomas?

Yes, I've met Donald.

He is

just super confident and himself like extrovert.

Oh my gosh, yes.

He's an attorney.

He used to be the judge in town.

He's his family's been there in that same small town for generations.

And he's just so

confident.

He's so funny.

He's, he can, He's just so comfortable in any situation.

And when you were a kid, would you get excited when he'd come over?

Oh my gosh.

I just,

he's like 10, 12 years older than me.

And he was kind of like, he's my cousin, but

he and his brothers felt like older brothers to me.

Yeah.

And they were kind of like younger brothers to my mother.

And so we just have this very close,

weird relationship with these four brothers.

Do you have a big family like that, Fortune?

I have such a nuclear family, but you guys have this like a big loud house with everybody kind of.

I mean, I had

in my immediate family was two older brothers and myself.

And we have a bunch of cousins, but they live in Florida.

So there were times when the family, it was a big family situation,

but not all the time.

Yeah, see, like that side of my family,

they're kind of those, it's a small town.

People just walk into each other's homes.

Nobody's ringing doorbells or knocking.

And, you know,

it's just, it's a free-for-all.

And I always tell friends, like, if you're going through my town, here's where my cousin lives.

And I bet you $1 billion if you knock on Jimmy's door.

and go in and just say, I'm friends with Tig.

And she said, I could stay here a couple of weeks.

He wouldn't have a follow-up question.

And he wouldn't even, he would not, you can move in with him.

He would not reach out to ask me who this person is.

Thomas, you know Jimmy is.

I was like, I'm headed there.

I need a place to,

I need to get out of a couple of jams, so I'm going to go.

I remember one time when Thomas was with me, and we walked into Jimmy and Beverly's house.

And right when we walked in, they had this crazy,

like they said two seconds after we walked in their house, it was an infestation of what?

Do you remember?

I thought they were just like big moths or something, flies or something.

Something, but it was like a horror film.

They were all inside their house and they just hand Thomas this like electric tennis racket.

They had never met Thomas.

And they just put in his hand.

And they had a little flies.

And all of a sudden, seconds later, he's just going around this stranger's house.

Everybody's like batting at all of

these bugs.

Anyway, it's just, it's a circus.

They're very gregarious, fun, rib each other, just teasing, laughing, loud, but not obnoxious, just really fun.

Like, Michelle Buteau filmed an episode of a show of hers.

And well, I was in the episode, and we did this in my town.

Yeah.

And after we filmed, I called my cousin Jimmy and I said, hey, we just wrapped up.

Can I bring my friend Michelle over?

And he was like, yeah, he was like, bring everyone.

And I was like, Oh, well, I was like, Oh, Jimmy, I said, It's a whole TV crew.

And he goes, Yeah, yeah, yeah, bring everyone.

And I was like,

Okay.

And so I tell the whole crew.

I mean, I'm talking every person from the crew

comes over.

And this is, Jimmy said, Bring them over now.

And then he, and he had a crawfish boil in the back, in his backyard within a half hour.

And the whole, whole crew was partying in his yard 30 minutes later.

And,

like, I have hilarious videos of that after party, and they were all just the crew was like, We never get invited to anything, it's always like the stars.

And I was like, Oh, I said, Yeah, my cousin is, they are down.

Yeah,

down.

He's got a crawfish guy that he just calls up, like, bring me the good stuff.

Yeah, and that's where we got married, was at Jimmy's house.

Oh, no way.

That whole family, they're just like,

they're just, and that's when I say, honestly, if you walked in his door and said, I'm going to go upstairs and crash for a few weeks.

I need some time alone.

He'd be like, absolutely.

My house is yours.

Tell me what you need.

Very nice to meet you, May.

What do your parents do?

Tell me, where are you from?

Like, he's just like,

they're also very welcoming.

I don't know why I went to Lake Arrowhead.

I should have gone.

You should have gone to the house.

You should have gone to Mississippi.

Yeah, to have a crawfish boil.

Yeah.

Oh, man.

Oh, my God.

One last thing.

His daughter's best friend is a gay guy in New Orleans.

And New Orleans is like an hour away from my town.

And he and his husband were having their engagement party.

And Jimmy's daughter was hosting it at

Jimmy's house.

And we had heard that

just it was the house was packed, just all gay guys.

And like there were drag queens, and

we were just like, Stephanie and I were just eating this up

hearing about their engagement party at Jimmy's house.

And Stephanie was like, Jimmy, I heard your house is just full of gay guys and drag queens last weekend.

He was like, absolutely.

He said,

it wasn't the first time and it won't be the last.

And we were just laughing thinking of Jimmy, who's like in his boat shoes and shorts and like polo button down, just being like, hello, my name is Jimmy.

What do your parents do?

To like a big drag queen.

And

my house is your house.

Everybody's welcome.

Please tell your family to come visit.

I like Jimmy.

There's something so nice about.

Yeah, a straight guy who's super comfortable with it.

It's crazy that's even still a thing, like that I'm still, like, my heart is so warmed by the idea of like a southern straight guy who's just like

really into hanging with, yeah, that's great.

Anyway, that's, that's what I think of with my childhood.

Yeah.

I had a godmother who lived with us when I was tiny and she was 19 when she lived with us.

She lived in our basement.

And

like when I was, I want to say born, my, her dad ran a

primary school that my brother went to and she got to know my mom and my mom was, she needed somewhere to live my mom was like just move in with us and you can kind of babysit to make cash sometimes and and hang with the kids and then she was just like a huge part of our life for years and years and was so fun is so fun her name's V

she's so fun and fun with kids and like would invent games like this game called hop hop hop where we would hide a spoon under a pillow and then you hop around the house and then she sings the hop hop hop song and if you stop on the pillow that has the spoon you get a prize.

And

my brother would be so outraged because the prize was raisins.

And he was like, I can get those out of the cupboard at any time.

It should have been the spoon that was.

It should have been, you get to keep the spoon.

But she was just like fun.

And we would really laugh together.

And

we wrote a song together when I was about seven called Look.

And I still remember it.

It's open, open strumming, like no chords.

And it's sort of performance art.

And it's like, look

into the nest in the nest there is an egg in the egg there is a bird look but it goes on for about 12 verses go on

yeah because

catchy it's like a Russian nesting doll you fly into the future into the present into the past look

anyway it was but imagine a seven-year-old doing that with us yeah I can imagine you doing that for sure yeah it sounds like it might have inspired a lot of who who you are.

100%.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But that people do have such a huge impact on you.

Yeah.

Even if they're not, you know, your primary attachments or whatever, like, that's so important, I think.

It's so important for kids to meet people outside.

I mean, it sounds like an obvious statement, but like because everyone is so kind of in their homes on phones, computers, iPads, online games, it's so important to go in for kids to go into other people's homes and see how they live and meet these different personalities and interact so you can be influenced by these different characters.

And be like, there's different ways to live outside my family.

Yeah.

And to have someone who you can kind of, you know, one of your parents.

says something and you can kind of roll your eyes with this other adult is so validating.

Yeah.

Well, and they kind of bring out the like imagination of kids more and the like excitement and adventure of things.

Yeah,

I think they kind of foster that environment where you want to be kind of eccentric to right along with them.

Yeah, what about you?

Did you have like a family friend?

I've mentioned them before, but I grew up with two uncles, my mom's brothers, who,

for lack of a better word, had like learning disabilities.

So they had like the education of,

I think they went through sixth grade, but they had maybe that like

mental capacity of

maybe that age as well.

But they just were so fun

and but adults.

So I'm a kid like looking at them as adults, but they're like kind of my peers in a way.

Yeah.

Were they twins?

They were not twins.

One was born that way and one um

i can't remember if i told you this his when he was born they used forceps on his head wow yeah and so it created these these problems right um so like crazy i know and and um so they just were like the most eccentric people i've ever come across still yeah in all of my life uh-huh um and i've never been able to talk about them very much because it's hard to describe them

in a way that makes sense to people, but

just very

animated.

And

one was, as he got older,

he was hunched over and he chewed cigars.

Are they still alive?

No, one died when I was seven.

And then my other uncle, Bud, died when I was like 24.

Would they play with you and stuff when they'd come over?

No, they were lazy.

All the better.

So my Uncle Bud,

he loved to garden and actually was a great gardener.

But he would lay in the garden and plant stuff.

That's just like a great gardener.

He would like lay down.

on his side and like go and plant stuff with one hand.

While he was lying down?

While he was lying down.

All right.

that's a good gardener.

Yeah, that's awesome.

And he would lay out in the front yard, too, with his hat kind of over his eyes.

And when people would walk by, he'd go, much obliged, much obliged.

And

he called me little bud.

He was bud, and I was little bud.

That's so cute.

Can we call you little bud?

I don't guess.

But

he took us to the circus when I was a kid and and he he was an uncle who was like you want a monkey I'll get you a monkey and my mom's like she can't have a monkey and I'm like but I can have a monkey and she's like you can't own a monkey and

where he would just like show up with a puppy and she's like we can't keep a puppy and he's like why not and uh he's got a point now wait

with um when you said kind of the um level of like a sixth grader, was he coming over by himself or was

it?

He drove.

He had a license somehow.

But he lived with my grandmother his whole life.

Yeah, so she made all his meals for him.

He had no teeth, but like two.

They were all rotted out because he wouldn't shower or brush his teeth.

Okay.

And he always had

cigar juice down his shirt.

And he loved to eat.

And he when we when we take us to the circus he goes hey little bud

you know what noise an elephant makes and i was like no bud and he's like

ongawa um gawa

what umgawa was his

he goes ongawa he goes where'd you think of that i don't know but he said that's the name of uh an elephant i mean that's how an elephant talked and then

he would go to restaurants and ask for sweet milk milk.

And they were like, what?

And he's like, I want sweet milk.

And they were like, well, okay.

And so they would bring him milk and a packet of sugar.

And he goes, What's this?

And they're like, you want a sweet milk.

And he just was trying to get whole milk.

But he would call it sweet milk.

Because it tasted sweeter to him.

And like, that's

no, bud.

And he picked me up once from school when I was five.

And my mom's friend thought I'd been kidnapped.

She because

he was very jarring-looking, yeah.

And so, she called my mom, being like, I thought

that's saying that I'd been kidnapped, and that this man, this like, like, woolly-looking man had taken me.

And she's like, Oh, that's my brother.

I love that the teacher let you get in the car and drive away before and then made the call.

And he drove this Jeep that like the old-ass Jeep where the floor was like, um,

rusted out.

And you could like, Was it just her and her two brothers?

What's that?

Was it your mother and her two brothers?

There were three brothers, but two of them had this,

these disabilities.

And so for, and he, and Bud would watch television and confuse real life with TV.

And he'd be like,

you know, he'd watch Texas Walker Ranger.

And so.

he would think that stuff was happening in real life and so he'd tell you stories and you'd be like what And then you'd realize it was the TV show,

and then he'd be like, A squirrel came and talked to me today, and you're just like,

Yeah, of course.

What, what, how does the squirrel talk?

What is he?

He never told me how the squirrel talks, but he, and he, he was like, Oprah said chocolate is good for you, so I'm gonna give me some chocolate.

And I'm like, I don't know if that's what she said.

And he goes, Also, the air conditioning can kill you.

He, he's like, Mayfax, but buttfax, but just absorbed from the TV and like shelters and stuff.

Yeah, so

uh, so my life, my childhood was very colorful because of them, yeah.

And was your family open about talking about what was going on with them, or was it yeah, in a small town, everybody knew who they were.

Uh, well, except for my mom, that one mom, my mom's friend who just moved to town.

Uh, but yeah, for the most part, people just knew like, oh, that's Evelyn's boys that have lived with her forever.

Yeah.

My grandma took care of them till the day she died.

Wow.

And that's the grandma that you are so close with.

Yeah.

Yeah.

She died before Bud did.

And then my mom had to take care of him for a few years.

And

he's just like, get me out of here.

But they were so lovely and, you know, just sweet spirited,

kind.

love to eat, love candy, love watching TV, just very simple, but you know,

good-hearted men.

I love that.

Yeah.

Small town is kind of ideal there.

Like, everyone's kind of looking out for each other.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's it.

Yeah, well, it makes it hard, you know, when you're in such a big city, people are so disconnected and they start to not care about the town or people.

And then you go to a little town and

you take pride in where you live and

keeping up your yard.

Not every town.

Professor Boyle.

You invite an entire television crew.

I mean, obviously, again, not every small town is all picturesque and whatever, but I think it is.

There's just something really nice about a small town vibe.

Or it can be.

There can be.

Yeah, yeah I love where I'm from it's very cute very

kind and a lot of people looking out for each other that's nice yeah should we hear Alex's answer yeah

let's do it in my community there's a woman named Sharon and she

had a pet parrot named snooks who loved to curse and also she had long fingernails and she would paint current events on the fingernails remember once she showed me like OJ stabbing Nicole when I was very, very young.

She was entirely inappropriate as a person and I

adored her.

So I was wondering if you guys had a similar kooky adult.

All right guys.

Bye.

Similar but different.

Yes.

I wonder if everyone who's in the arts or a comedian or performer in some way, like always think about the most eccentric people the most fondly when they look back.

Yeah.

I can't believe she would paint current events on like, that's crazy.

That makes me want to paint Tay and trav i was gonna say i feel like

yeah may's brain is a churning mm-hmm yeah because today will live forever and as the day they got engaged august 26th

we are all over the place with when we record episodes

but i always love it it's always a slice and a treat

I wish I could kiss you guys right now.

I wish I could lick your nose.

Your eyes close like that.

I've gotten in trouble before for keeping my eyes open when I kiss.

Oh, yeah, that's not good.

Don't do that.

I know.

It's creepy.

I just sometimes forget to close them.

Well, sometimes you want to see the person that you're so excited and happy to be kissing, right?

Exactly.

You got to get in there, man, like this.

Well, Fortune.

Fortune's become very sexual.

We're just trying to podcast in Fortune's French kissing, our podcast.

You want to see who's up to being sexual.

Look at that guy.

I can't even tell what part of his body is wearing there.

He's just a white florida.

Does anyone have anything coming up?

Tomorrow night, I'm at Largo in LA on September 17th.

And I got Wayward coming out September 25th.

Get ready.

Plan a watch party.

Let me know what you think.

I hope you like it.

What about you guys?

I've got shows in like Houston, D.C., Atlanta, Boston.

Did I say that already?

Chicago, San Jose.

Yeah, my website.

I mean, talk about Mississippi.

I'm going to be down with all of my gregarious cousins.

September 27th, Biloxi, Mississippi.

If you live in Mississippi or anywhere nearby, I'll be there.

So come on out and also check tignotaro.com for all of my Los Angeles and Toronto dates.

And also, please subscribe to the podcast and subscribe to YouTube.

Share your favorite episode with a loved one so you can have them join this handsome community and you can chat about this nonsense that goes on on the show.

Send it to the person who was the eccentric adult in your life.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, good idea.

Send it to your eccentric adult.

Also go to handsomepod.com for merchandise.

A bunch of our handsome fans weighed in on what kind of merch they want to see next.

So we'll be drumming up some fun new stuff too.

That's always exciting.

I saw some really interesting slash weird suggestions.

There were some interesting ones.

What people want the word handsome on is quite all over the place.

Well, I guess all that remains is to remind everyone to keep it

handsome.

Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feemster.

The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willette.

Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsome pod.

What a podcast!

What a podcast!

What a podcast!

That was a hit gun podcast.

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