Kate Micucci asks about childhood lies

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Speaker 4 Handsome.

Speaker 2 China with friends on the handsome pod. China friends on the handsome pod.

Speaker 2 Cheers.

Speaker 2 Welcome to the Handsome Pod.

Speaker 1 We're live, in person, live with each other, not with you.

Speaker 2 We're live. We are living in the live.
In person, you guys.

Speaker 2 I'm Mae Martin. I'm Fortune Feamster.
And I am Tignotaro. And we're together in person again, sitting on a couch.
I love that song. I know.
I love to sing it to you.

Speaker 2 Came out in the 80s.

Speaker 2 What's going on? Oh, sorry. Oh,

Speaker 2 okay.

Speaker 2 And that's you, too.

Speaker 2 It is like, listen, the show's fun. Yep.
Zoom does it. Yeah.
Because it needs to. Yeah.
But my God, is it a different vibe in person?

Speaker 2 Different vibe.

Speaker 1 It's so much nicer.

Speaker 2 Look you guys right in the eyes. Yeah.

Speaker 2 How attractive are we? How handsome? We're pretty handsome. How handsome are we? We're real handsome.
Yeah. We're all looking good.
We're on full of ourselves today.

Speaker 2 May, are you still the number one star in Hollywood?

Speaker 1 Absolutely. Please say yes.

Speaker 2 I'm Hollywood. I'm sure I've dipped down.
I haven't checked. Okay, tell us what is different about your life.
Oh, yeah. Has anything changed? Absolutely nothing.
Well, nothing. Come on.

Speaker 2 Are you getting calls from people in the biz?

Speaker 2 No, I mean, I got my phone. I called you.
You called me. I got my phone back after that retreat.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 yeah, there was a minute where it was like popping off.

Speaker 1 But if you put your phone away, nothing's different, except I've had a couple people in life

Speaker 1 come up to me and confront me about my character's choices in Wayward, which I like. I'll get into it with that.
I mean, I'm with them.

Speaker 1 He's a flawed character. Right.

Speaker 2 But yeah, nothing other than that. Nothing really.
So is it, are you like, gosh,

Speaker 2 my whole life, I'm going after this goal. I get the top, top, top honor.
The number one show in the world. Number one in Croatia.
Number one on Star Meter. And you're saying there's nothing?

Speaker 2 I didn't.

Speaker 1 Starmeter wasn't on my radar.

Speaker 2 What are you having to even work for? Yeah, it changes nothing. Tell us what it's like up there.
Listen.

Speaker 2 What is it like to be the number one star? It's a lot of the same.

Speaker 2 You still have a raccoon in your backpack. You still have a raccoon, a skunk,

Speaker 2 possum. Are they impressed? Do they know?

Speaker 1 He doesn't said shit.

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 1 It's fucked. It's actually fucked.

Speaker 2 But you're still putting your pants on one leg at a time.

Speaker 1 One leg at a time. I'm still doing spells.
I'm still,

Speaker 1 you know, tormented by the same things.

Speaker 2 You know, you're still an awkward person.

Speaker 2 What do you think?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 What did I say when we got here today? I can't believe we're actually here together. Oh, I'm scared.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 No, I,

Speaker 2 in a real way,

Speaker 2 like, is there, what, how do you feel? How, how did it feel to be like, wow,

Speaker 2 my show really broke through.

Speaker 1 I'm glad that I'm 38 and not 20.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 1 I feel like I've been doing it long enough that it is a job and it's not my whole self-worth and identity. So, but it feels amazing.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But, you know, you don't really, the main thing is you're kind of only as good as your last thing. Or like, if it had really bombed, that might have.

Speaker 2 So you're only as good as number one. Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 1 Well, like, if it had really bombed, that that might have legitimately affected my ability to get another show away or do so.

Speaker 1 I'm like, okay, at least I know hopefully I'll be able to make another show. And so I'm waiting.
I'm going to have like a big check-in.

Speaker 2 I thought you were saying a big check.

Speaker 2 Waiting. I have a big check.

Speaker 2 That big old check.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 But no, it feels

Speaker 1 the same. I mean, you probably have

Speaker 2 a lot of new fans.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, it is tempered by the climate that we live in.
Like, it is that.

Speaker 2 There's a blowback as well.

Speaker 1 There really is. And the exposure is kind of scary.
And, like,

Speaker 1 thinking about my tour coming up and getting, but then, I don't know. The reason I went to that retreat place partly was because I was like, this is everything I've ever worked for, really.

Speaker 1 And I, and I'm not really enjoying it or it's not penetrating. Right.
Like, there's some, I feel like I don't deserve it or whatever. And so hopefully,

Speaker 1 yeah, I feel like I'm appreciating it and I'm happy about it. But I don't know.
I still feel, yeah.

Speaker 2 I have a question. Yeah, hit me.

Speaker 2 You dyed your hair brown for the show, but it's still kind of brown.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You know what?

Speaker 2 That's your question? I dyed it yesterday. I mean, like, I guess, let me pose it as a question.
Have you abandoned the full-on blonde? I like it. I just...
You just were so blonde for so long.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and then I went back to blonde after the show. And then just a couple days ago, I went.

Speaker 2 Girl, that's your question. Girl, girl, girl, there are a lot of people probably wanted to know the answer to this as well.

Speaker 2 Girl, we have a moment here with a star, and you're girl, you're talking about Mae's star meter. I want to know if Mae is twirling around in their house alone saying, I'm a star.
And they're not May.

Speaker 2 So I moved on to the next question, which is, did you even say blonde? Would you have noticed that I'm not? I didn't have noticed it yet. You would not have noticed it.

Speaker 2 Notice it. Girl.
But I see it now. I see it as we are very similar.
Girl. Girl, girl.
Girls? Girls. Girl.
Girls. Girls.

Speaker 2 So are you going back to blonde? Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 I thought you were going to say so.

Speaker 1 I just freestyle with boxes that I buy from Walgreens. I dye it myself.

Speaker 2 You did it yourself? Yeah. Larry knew this, girl.
Girl, I forgot.

Speaker 2 Girl, please.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 What about you guys?

Speaker 2 What about you? Do you already have an idea for another show? Yes. Okay.
Yeah. And it's not like a Wayward 2.

Speaker 1 Well, that's in conversation. But

Speaker 1 my gut instinct is if I was really going to be honest with myself, I have an idea for another world. I want to

Speaker 1 say

Speaker 1 that I'm pumped about this. But who knows if I got really pumped about an idea for Wayward 2?

Speaker 2 And if they gave you a big fat paycheck,

Speaker 2 that's always hopeful.

Speaker 2 These girls know. know girl we would go shopping would we not oh my god

Speaker 2 flannels

Speaker 2 this house being straight women

Speaker 2 this is us going through the shopping mall

Speaker 2 that flannel girl girl look at those hiking boots

Speaker 2 okay

Speaker 2 wait what was our question how are you i'm good yeah how's uh life on the golf course? Life on the golf course is great.

Speaker 2 I'm actually losing weight on this show because I'm walking so much on these golf courses and I'm, you know, play Will's caddy. Yeah.
So I have this giant golf bag and they want it to look realistic.

Speaker 2 So everything is full.

Speaker 2 I'm like, can we not put these fake clubs in here? Yeah, surely. No, it is all

Speaker 2 girl. Girl, it is loaded.
Oh my God. And Will won't help you? I mean,

Speaker 2 isn't this? Will, help me. Isn't this an improv show?

Speaker 2 Because couldn't you improv that your character always tries to give Will the food together?

Speaker 2 No, part of it is that I'm not, I don't know anything about golf, and I'm always like handing the wrong clubs. That's funny.

Speaker 1 But also, I like being on set because

Speaker 1 of the food is because it's healthier than I would have at home.

Speaker 2 Really? Mine's where I'm like, snacking way more on set. But somehow I'm losing weight because I'm getting way more steps than yeah.

Speaker 2 How many steps are you getting in on the golf course there, girl? Oh, girl.

Speaker 2 I'm probably averaging like 12,000. Girl.
And the day I moved, I'm don't overdo it, girl. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. The new house.
I am in a new place. It's great.

Speaker 2 You feel a girl. Girl, tell me.
You hung up all your fairy lights.

Speaker 2 Well, I'm still getting it. I'm situated.
I'm still unpacking. But I like it because it's reminds me of my house that i owned for many years um

Speaker 2 it's just a little bigger um but it's so manageable yeah smaller than my old place oh way smaller

Speaker 1 you go in you feel like i know where everything is

Speaker 2 it's one story it's just It's just easy. Yeah.
And that's what I wanted to get back to: was just like, I didn't want this massive thing. Howlace.
You were tired of living in that house.

Speaker 2 That it just feels easier. So I like that because I just don't have to worry about a house and a bunch of rooms and furniture.
I still have to 12 bedrooms. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I still have to buy like a dining room table and you know, I still need furniture. Yeah.
Empty, one empty bedroom.

Speaker 2 Were you ever at a point in life where when you were furnishing your apartment, you used like a card table? That's

Speaker 1 100%.

Speaker 1 Oh, and just stuff I would find on the street.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, completely. My ex drug a couch home full of scabies.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Do what you can in those days.

Speaker 1 I mean, I slept with a sleeping bag. Like, I just didn't want to spend my money on bedding, I guess.
So when I got kicked out and I was 16, I brought my, I had my sleeping bag with me.

Speaker 1 And then I didn't get an, I mean, I, until I was 21, probably. And I was just sleeping in a sleeping bag with no,

Speaker 1 like on a mattress, but with no sheets or

Speaker 1 it was very comforting.

Speaker 2 I was like, it's that was kind of like my father's living arrangement. Like, he had a card table and just loose change all over it and a mattress on the floor.
Yeah, like, you know, yeah.

Speaker 1 But it's there's something comforting about it. Is there?

Speaker 1 I don't know, actually.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, why would you say that? Well, I'm trying to remember their days.

Speaker 1 I was very attached to that sleeping bag in the morning.

Speaker 2 Sure, because that was like the thing you had

Speaker 2 with you. Yeah, a little duffel bag.
It'll be cool once I get this place kind of just all sorted out.

Speaker 2 But right now, it's like curtains don't come for a minute still.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you move and you get excited. You go online and buy stuff and then you don't realize that it's like delivery April 2026.

Speaker 2 So people are like peeking, seeing you run around your gams?

Speaker 2 The back of the house is open. The rest,

Speaker 2 I have some blinds in the front. Good.

Speaker 1 um but yeah so just the raccoons are getting a glimpse of your little naked bum as you run from the shadow

Speaker 2 do you walk around naked not full naked no but like what but like you know just no panties in my granny panties

Speaker 2 just a shirt no pants flannel t-shirt

Speaker 2 sports bra no pants

Speaker 2 no pants

Speaker 2 said the porky pig

Speaker 2 so yeah everything's everything's good it's just uh

Speaker 2 yeah, kind of just living life right now.

Speaker 1 You haven't spent much time in the house. You're always away.

Speaker 2 Well, that's the thing is this show came so out of nowhere and it happened. Like they hired me and then we're like, we're filming in two weeks.
And I'm just like, oh my God. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And I had this full tour schedule. So I had to reschedule a number of shows because with the golf courses, they're like, we can't like work around this.
This is when this golf course is available.

Speaker 2 This is when we have to film. Yeah.
And a lot of people. I mean, golf is important.

Speaker 2 Like, they can't shift schedules. No.

Speaker 2 It was a lot of the times were Friday nights. And I was like, oh.

Speaker 2 So I had to reschedule these shows, which I hate doing.

Speaker 2 And somehow I've managed not to have to reschedule many shows, but it was just such a quick turnaround that I am, I didn't want to also reschedule the Saturday shows. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Because those were like big theaters, like the Chicago Theater and all these places that take a long time to book, like a year ahead.

Speaker 2 So I'm filming a lot of nights on Fridays to like two in the morning and then getting on a 6 a.m. flight.
Girl. And it's,

Speaker 2 yeah. So I can't really catch up right now, but it's all good stuff.
So

Speaker 2 I really don't have any like ugh about it because I'm loving all the things I'm doing. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 And Tig, you're Stephanie's still away? You're still solo?

Speaker 2 Stephanie's away.

Speaker 1 How are you feeling?

Speaker 2 Being a movie star. Yeah, we're feeling good.
I'm like, it's so funny.

Speaker 2 I'm like, as I told you, like really into staying on top of things because the whatever the house police might come by and

Speaker 2 see if I have roles as the house.

Speaker 2 I love that.

Speaker 2 Make sure the laundry's done.

Speaker 1 Just to come and check and

Speaker 2 make sure

Speaker 2 everything in order. And I feel like if they went through and checked,

Speaker 2 everything's in order. You know, we got food, clean clothes put away, and beds made.

Speaker 1 Lisa Gilroy does a thing where she pretends to be her own assistant. So she'll go,

Speaker 1 she'll go, okay,

Speaker 1 in her mind, I'm going out, and my assistant's coming over just to really get stuff done. So I hope my assistant does a good job.

Speaker 1 Then she'll leave the house, go back in as the assistant, be like, got to get the work done for two hours.

Speaker 2 And then that's mental illness.

Speaker 2 I saw that. That's cute.
That's.

Speaker 2 Oh, she said she saw you.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 2 I walked by a restaurant. I think I was was with Max and Finn, and I saw her in there having.

Speaker 2 Was it her or hers?

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 girl. Girl.

Speaker 2 But,

Speaker 2 yeah, Stephanie's just having the time of her life.

Speaker 1 That's so good. I mean,

Speaker 2 it's so nice just to know that it's been a really positive experience.

Speaker 1 That time difference is annoying because I have a lot of friends in England and it's, yeah, eight hours ahead or seven hours?

Speaker 2 Yeah, eight hours.

Speaker 1 So are you FaceTiming with the boys when you can?

Speaker 2 Well,

Speaker 2 they'll do that on their iPads because they're allowed to be on iPads in the mornings

Speaker 2 before their day starts.

Speaker 2 And then no more for the day. Yeah.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 they'll FaceTime her. Yeah.
Like on their own accord. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. And

Speaker 2 Finn is, he's so

Speaker 2 type A. You know, he'll, he'll come in.
Maybe I told you this. I was in bed.
It was 6.45. Did I mention this? No.
This is like two weeks in. Yeah.
And he goes, Mayor, it's 6.45.

Speaker 2 I'm making my breakfast. Max hasn't eaten, and we have to be out of the door at 7.40.
Oh, wow. And

Speaker 2 I was lying about it. I go, I was like, thank you, Finn.
Thanks for the reminder. And he's like, okay.

Speaker 2 And then he leaves. And two days ago, I was on a Zoom with my,

Speaker 2 I do 7 a.m. Zoom with my therapist.
Yeah. And so I'm on with her, and then she sees me look over, and she's like, oh, did somebody walk in? I said, yeah, hold on one second.
What is it, Finn?

Speaker 2 He goes, just wanted to remind you, today we have swim, so just have to make sure you get our swimsuits in the bag.

Speaker 2 And I was like,

Speaker 2 he's so funny. Oh my God.

Speaker 2 We really have the odd couple between the two of them.

Speaker 2 It's so funny. But it is such a delight to be.
When I told my therapist, I go, oh, my son, he's very, like, he loves his schedule.

Speaker 2 He loves the schedule.

Speaker 2 And I said, but I feel like I've been holding down the fort pretty well. And she said, well, it sounds like you would have no other choice but stand in the house.

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Speaker 2 Don't miss their seasonal products.

Speaker 2 But yeah, we went out to dinner. I took them,

Speaker 2 surprised them, picked them up from school, and we went to dinner. And then they were like,

Speaker 2 can we go for ice cream after? And I would have normally been like, it's a school night.

Speaker 2 But I was like, yeah, let's go for ice cream

Speaker 2 Yeah, and we just had so much fun just laughing at dinner and it just it was it was just it was fun. That's what I've been up to.
Oh, that was really nice. Yeah, I like that.
Oh, yeah, they're cool.

Speaker 2 I'm going to the cheesecake factory tonight. I don't want either of you to be jealous.
I am jealous. Barry the lead.
Bury the lead. I know.
Sorry I didn't tell you that sooner. Who are you?

Speaker 2 What's going on there? They have great vegan options, by the way. They do.
Yes, they're Check it out. They're a place.
I don't want to order it, but I'll check it out.

Speaker 2 Regular spaghetti and a salad. That's vegan.
If you don't put cheese on it, I love you, too.

Speaker 2 But when I'm touring, Cheesecake Factory is a place that I can rely on. I love that.
I'm going with my friends Zach Noe Towers.

Speaker 2 He's a very funny comedian. He listens to Handsome.
Shout out, Zach.

Speaker 2 He opens for me quite a bit. And then Taylor Tomlinson, who has also asked us a question on the handsome pod.
The three of you are going to the cheesecake. The three of us have a friend date.

Speaker 2 And why the Cheesecake Factory? That's what Zach picks. And we do love the Cheesecake Factory.
And is he, was he, he loves, like,

Speaker 2 not ironically. Nobody's ironically.
No, we are going for the genuine love of the Cheesecake Factory. Well, I love that.
Yeah. Yeah.
I'm stoked. Yeah.

Speaker 1 My favorite thing is like going to see a movie at the Grove or something and going to a Cheesecake Factory before.

Speaker 2 By yourself.

Speaker 2 Yeah, sometimes I'll go by myself. You'll go to a movie and then take yourself out for a treat.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think I have probably done that. I'll take my little notebook.
All right. We're going to that Cheesecake Factory.
At the Grove?

Speaker 2 At the Grove, and Taylor wants us to get the seat that allows us to look at the people going into the movie theater. Oh, yeah.
Oh, is that what she wants?

Speaker 2 That is her one request. My one request is to order cheesecake, and I will do that.
Yeah, you will. I want to get that peanut butter one.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 That's what I'd go go for. Yeah.

Speaker 2 How many different cheesecakes do they have? Like 40, right?

Speaker 2 I don't know. This is not a paid sponsorship.

Speaker 2 We are not getting paid by cheesecake back. We're not just casually talking about the cheesecake, but I do like a chain restaurant in general.

Speaker 1 Do you? I love chili.

Speaker 1 I like, maybe it's a, because I got a touch of the tism. I'm like, I like the rigidity.
I like knowing what to expect. I like, I know what I'm going to get.

Speaker 2 Am I allowed to say touch of the tism?

Speaker 2 Honestly, I I don't know. Okay.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I think

Speaker 1 I'm allowed to own it, but it's self-diagnosed, so I don't know.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're self-diagnosed. Yeah.
Would you ever want to get to the bottom of it for real? Well,

Speaker 1 it happened because so many people.

Speaker 2 We know you love to get to the bottom of things.

Speaker 1 I love to get to the bottom.

Speaker 2 Is that a sexual joke?

Speaker 2 Girl, no. Girl.

Speaker 1 Although, you know,

Speaker 2 girl, Marie.

Speaker 1 I did. Speaking of sexual things, I did, I did.

Speaker 2 What do you got for us? Well, I did just remember

Speaker 1 about 20 minutes ago and my stomach dropped that.

Speaker 2 So when I got back from the retreat, I walk in my door, girls, and I find a bunch

Speaker 2 or something like that.

Speaker 2 And I find I'd forgotten that I'd ordered a bunch of like

Speaker 1 BDSM stuff.

Speaker 2 Like tons of BSM. Wait, what is that? Wait,

Speaker 2 what does BDSM stand for?

Speaker 2 Bad, but

Speaker 1 Something sadomasochism, right? Oh, like

Speaker 2 weapons? No, like just, well, any masks.

Speaker 2 Wait, can you tell us a couple of the things? Okay.

Speaker 2 This is what our listeners tune in for. Because yeah, it takes plugging her ears.
Oh, grandma. Grandma Marie.

Speaker 2 Like

Speaker 2 whips, chains,

Speaker 2 handcuffs.

Speaker 1 I had like a sesh in mind that I'm planning. And so.

Speaker 2 A sesh? Oh, like

Speaker 2 that you're going to do this with someone.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 there's like

Speaker 2 leather stuff that kind of

Speaker 1 attaches the person's wrist to their wait.

Speaker 2 The leather part is what threw you. Fortune? True, good point.

Speaker 2 Leather! Leather!

Speaker 1 There's like bondage stuff, and then there's some

Speaker 1 pretty weird stuff. You know, I just got excited about it.

Speaker 2 You were in a place. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 So I get back from my very pure, wholesome retreat, and I've got basically a whole dungeon waiting for me in this.

Speaker 2 Plus hot dogs. This is, yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 And a harness for the hot dogs.

Speaker 2 Oh, that was, cut that out. This is Kay.

Speaker 1 But it was like a fridge-size box of stuff.

Speaker 1 And then I've just 20 minutes ago remembered that my cleaner is coming today, this poor woman. And I've, I've unboxed, and it's sitting there in my fucking bedroom.

Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh.

Speaker 1 And she is the sweetest, purest woman. And I've, I forgot to hide it.

Speaker 2 She thinks it's a Halloween costume. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. That's a possible one.

Speaker 1 When you're there. Some of this stuff.

Speaker 2 I don't know. Well, you'll go home and she'll be there, and you'll just be like, can't wait for Halloween.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true.

Speaker 2 You have to play into it.

Speaker 2 I go, did my package come? Yeah, yeah, it's

Speaker 2 scared of this. Oh, and then you'll be like, oh, this is all the wrong stuff.
This is not what I ordered.

Speaker 2 I did not. This is not what I'm doing.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God.
Yeah, I'm problem solved. Little Bo Peep.
Yeah. Yeah.
Little Bo Peep peekaboo. Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 You know what I wanted to ask you?

Speaker 2 Now, I told you, Stephanie and I are waiting until she gets home

Speaker 2 to bondage. To watch

Speaker 2 Girl Marie. Girl Marie.
Girl Marie's to my new fame. To watch Wayward.
Okay,

Speaker 2 thank you.

Speaker 2 Thank you for waiting.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 you mentioned that there is some crazy sex scene. Here is my question.
Have you got there yet? Oh, yeah. Have you? Shit.

Speaker 2 Oh, wait, have I? You know, episode six. Yeah, you have.
Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, didn't. I didn't know if it was getting even steamier or something.
Okay, but something happened where you're like,

Speaker 2 okay.

Speaker 2 How do you feel about your parents seeing that?

Speaker 1 Oh, well, I asked them if they'd watched. I mean, to be honest, my parents have not acknowledged to me that they've watched or finished the show.

Speaker 2 They have. Oh, my mom watched it.

Speaker 1 Ginger watched it.

Speaker 2 I forgot. Ginger said to tell you that she watched it and you did a great job.
Oh, Joe. And Ginger's very proud of you.

Speaker 2 Yeah, she was like, I watched Wayward.

Speaker 2 You have to tell May. I watched it.
It was great. May did a great job.

Speaker 2 Do you know what?

Speaker 2 Your mother is the perfect example of when people are older and they say, you know, I was once young too.

Speaker 2 I'm that same person.

Speaker 2 I'm just older.

Speaker 2 You think that it's like this crazy concept that an older person is going to take something in or have

Speaker 2 an awareness like that, you're just like, I can't remember. That's why I was asking, like with parents.
But the fact that Ginger isn't like clutching her pearls, she's like,

Speaker 2 yeah, just like, tell me, what a great job. And that's amazing.
And I should have followed up with, what did you think about?

Speaker 2 But I didn't.

Speaker 2 Apparently, my mom didn't think twice about it.

Speaker 1 I know my parents are like slowly watching it I think and I said did you were you my mom said that she watched that scene like with her hands over her eyes so I which is

Speaker 2 good I think what about your brother how do you feel about that I don't I'm not specifically I had to put that out of my mind on it on the middle let's bring it back in oh god your family is watching it's very weird but it's it's almost weirder that a bunch of strangers have seen what I look like getting railed.

Speaker 2 Like that's that's weirder than like yours. But you were naked and feel-good quite a bit, right? Or not? Yeah, once we're in the middle of the day, you're naked right now.

Speaker 2 That's what our listeners don't realize. Is May's sitting here completely naked and toxic? Weirdly tied up.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 No, I'm doing the time.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're doing that. I'm doing the time.
You're the dominator. You wouldn't want to be tied.
Yeah, sure, yeah. What is that called? A domineering person? Dominatri.
You're the dominatrix.

Speaker 2 People don't pause after dhamma. Domineering.
Dama. Domini.
Deneering person. You have to be the one that's

Speaker 2 shut your mouth. Is that shirt?

Speaker 2 You shut your mouth or I'm handcuffing you. This is a new character.

Speaker 2 If you don't do what I say, I'm going to tie you up.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. Is it like that?

Speaker 2 I wonder if I could do this. You have to start

Speaker 2 a Dom business. A Dom business.
Take that.

Speaker 2 Ha!

Speaker 2 How that feel. Yeah.

Speaker 2 You're going to take that and like it. I mean, it's not bad.
Okay, I'll work on it.

Speaker 2 What are you? You're just like,

Speaker 2 oh my god.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I turn into like, is it,

Speaker 1 I don't know what it is, a lot of like,

Speaker 2 yes, yeah, yeah. I don't know exactly what I'm doing.
Like under your breath. Oh, my God.
Your voice gets mumbling.

Speaker 2 No, I don't know.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I love what May pulls back and it's like, no, I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.

Speaker 2 I just feel like. You clearly channel something.
I could go into a different.

Speaker 1 I go into an altered state.

Speaker 2 Exactly.

Speaker 1 It comes very natural.

Speaker 2 And we don't. Oh, so you're real good at it.
Well, I liked it.

Speaker 1 Because there's something nice

Speaker 2 about like,

Speaker 1 like if you're really going to town on someone,

Speaker 1 you're doing it for their pleasure. So you're almost bottoming from the top.
Like you're working hard. You're putting on a show for this person.

Speaker 2 It's from the top.

Speaker 1 And there's a nice...

Speaker 1 I like it. I like both sides of it.
I'm into, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 You're bottoming from the top.

Speaker 2 Fortune camp. Hold on.
Give fortune a minute.

Speaker 2 So you're, but you're not taking it, you're giving it. I just mean

Speaker 1 you're in serving.

Speaker 2 You're topping from the bottom. No, bottoming from the top.

Speaker 2 The top from the bottom? The top from the bottom.

Speaker 2 I'm not good enough at math to know what we're talking about or what's happening.

Speaker 2 But I wish you all the best. And whoever's getting this.
Whoever's getting rail

Speaker 2 tied up.

Speaker 2 I wish you guys the best. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 But you got to have a sense of humor about it all.

Speaker 2 I do.

Speaker 2 We are currently laughing about it. Yeah, true.
You got to. You got to.
You got to. I just like that you're open about it.
I think it's great. Yeah.
Sex positive.

Speaker 1 I'm sex positive.

Speaker 2 Well, you know, life is short. I don't think I want someone talking.
Like, I don't like people being mean to me. Yeah.

Speaker 2 don't think it's my thing. Yeah, that's fair, even in a sexual way.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know that I like people being mean to me.

Speaker 2 I don't mind the dirty talk stuff.

Speaker 2 What do you mean you don't mind it or you like it? I like it.

Speaker 2 I don't, I, yeah,

Speaker 2 we got from I don't mind it. I don't want to be like handcuffed.
Oh, okay, okay. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But you could be handcuffed very kindly.

Speaker 2 At least.

Speaker 2 Maybe. I mean, no one's done it.

Speaker 2 Make it a crime. So maybe I just don't know if I like it.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Make it. Because we got nothing to be guilty of.

Speaker 2 I love it. You guys making eye contact while seeing that song?

Speaker 2 Say

Speaker 2 that we

Speaker 2 got a high

Speaker 2 sky. I don't know the rest of the world.
Oh, I do. I just know shadows falling.

Speaker 2 We stand alone. Did you guys see back? Bottom light, everybody.
everybody. If we've got a holiday, it comes there.

Speaker 1 We need to listen to that.

Speaker 2 Oh, I thought you were going to say we ought to get Barbara Streisand.

Speaker 2 Babs, we know you're listening. Please send in your video.

Speaker 1 I mean, we got to get Bette Midler.

Speaker 2 Did you see her on Colbert? I got Bette Midler.

Speaker 1 On Stephen Colbert, she sang. She was like, I haven't sung in years, but she sang the...

Speaker 2 Thank you.

Speaker 1 Thank God for you.

Speaker 1 She rewrote the lyrics for Stephen Colbert.

Speaker 1 It was stunning.

Speaker 1 God, she's good.

Speaker 2 I love the Divine Miss M.

Speaker 1 The Divine Miss M.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah, I've never met her.
I would like to meet her as well.

Speaker 1 I know. I mean, if we got a question from her, I'd lose

Speaker 2 her in crazy blessings. I was at some sort of event, I think, like a memorial, I think.
Actually, now that I'm saying it, for Gary Marshall. Okay.

Speaker 2 And Bette Medler was somebody that sang at his memorial.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And Stephanie not, I mean, I love Bette Medler, but Stephanie is like

Speaker 2 a big, big Bette Medler fan. Oh, my God.
And so we were sitting there, and then Bette came out.

Speaker 2 And Stephanie was like, oh, my God. I would die.
I would die.

Speaker 1 I saw her on Broadway in Hello Dolly. Oh, I wanted to see that.
That was crazy. She got a standing O for walking out on stage.

Speaker 2 I regret that I. I was in New York when she was doing it.

Speaker 2 I regret not just like paying a million dollars for the ticket it was incredible speaking of hello dolly hello dolly parton man you know gave us a scare she gave us a scare what happened well she had some health issues

Speaker 2 pray for her and everyone was like what's happening yeah i can't beat her

Speaker 2 tweet like whatever it is i'm not dead yet well yeah and she's also dead yet yeah i ain't dead yet um but she's been in the middle of doing her broadway play oh really yeah yeah like a bio

Speaker 2 Yeah. And she's like, I think

Speaker 2 writing, producing. She's been there every day.

Speaker 2 My friend Beth Malone, who listens to the podcast,

Speaker 2 who is the star of Fun Home. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 She's working on that.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 With Dollar. That's awesome.
That's wild. Yeah.
The ring of keys. I don't know how it goes, but.
Clearly.

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Speaker 2 That age group of women, I'm such a huge fan of, like, just with Diane Keaton.

Speaker 2 It made me go, oh, man, we're entering into that phase where

Speaker 2 that group of women will start dying. Oh, God.
And I know that's so true. I have something to tell you that will absolutely

Speaker 2 die. I get it.
No. Oh, okay.
No. I have something that I talked to Stephanie about yesterday.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 That

Speaker 2 I realized. I said, people would not believe this if I told them.
And she was like,

Speaker 2 probably not.

Speaker 2 I've never seen Diane Keaton in anything. I can't.

Speaker 2 Don't touch me. This can't be real.
The Godfather? No, I've never seen it. Diane Keaton.
I've never seen her. It's the National Treasure.
I've met her. Father of the Bride.
Father of the Bride.

Speaker 2 I didn't see Father of the Group. The Family Stone.

Speaker 2 As good as a gift. I saw that movie.
Oh, that movie. As good as a gift.
No.

Speaker 1 I am so glad that I got to meet her once at Lisa Kudra's birthday party.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, was she as dynamic as she seemed? Yes.

Speaker 1 And she was so Diane Keaton. And she was quirky, funny.
And she had a turtleneck and a glass of wine and gloves and glasses and a hat. And I was like, this is what I want.

Speaker 2 I had a chance to do a movie with her a couple years ago, and I just couldn't. They wanted me to fly out four different times.

Speaker 2 And I was on tour, and I was like, I want to do this just to be around her. Yeah, and I just couldn't.
I never got to meet her, and I was genuinely bummed when she passed.

Speaker 2 Yeah, uh, just because she just does represent an era of

Speaker 2 not only movies, but women, and just like interesting and interesting person, yeah, very interesting, yeah, yeah,

Speaker 1 would you would you do a little Diane Keaton Film Fest?

Speaker 2 Well, that's what Stephanie was saying. She was like, there's certain ones she was like, you just really have to see

Speaker 2 her. Make life better type thing.
It's fun to watch. Yeah.
That's what she said.

Speaker 2 And she just really

Speaker 2 was talking about how she kind of personifies being yourself is what is the most powerful thing. And how

Speaker 2 this woman bursts onto the scene basically dressing like a man. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And having her own style and her own everything.

Speaker 1 Even the way she speaks is so unique. And she's kind of herself in everything, like a version of herself, but so authentic.
And yeah.

Speaker 2 Anyway, I just wanted to annoy you. Well, thank you.

Speaker 2 But I do think it's very sad, of course. And I do want to,

Speaker 2 I hope Dolly hangs in there. Oh, God.

Speaker 2 Yeah. We need her around for a long time.
Yeah. Nobody's prepared for that.
No.

Speaker 1 I wonder if I scratch.

Speaker 1 Like, that's just scratching the surface, I feel, of things that you haven't seen that I just assume that you haven't.

Speaker 2 There's going to be a lot.

Speaker 1 There's going going to be things I think that would make me so shocked.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
And it's no offense to anybody. No,

Speaker 2 I'm like. You're living your life.

Speaker 2 I just was doing something else, I guess. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Have you seen any of the Scream movies?

Speaker 2 No. That does not seem like something Tig even now is going to watch.
Can I tell you something that made Stephanie laugh so hard? I'm going to do press, you know, for this documentary.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we've heard of press. Sure.
Yeah. And um, I'm going to be doing Drew Barrymore.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm doing it next week.

Speaker 2 Oh, me too. She will talk very and Kelly Clarkson.
What day are you?

Speaker 1 22nd. Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 You guys. Oh, my God.
I don't, we're going to be in New York at the same time. Yeah, say hi.
Yes, yes.

Speaker 2 You guys. But listen, listen to.
We got to hit up. We got to hit up New York together.
Listen. We'll talk like this to you.

Speaker 1 Thank God.

Speaker 2 She's the best. I'm talking to

Speaker 2 Stephanie. I'm going to be talking to Drew.
Yeah. And

Speaker 2 oh my gosh. I told you.
Fortunates, and I just thought, no, I want to kiss your hand. Oh, my gosh, Fortune.

Speaker 2 Stephanie might be out of town, but she's going to find out. She's going to see this.

Speaker 2 So I'm talking to the producer before my appearance. Yeah.
And the producer just casually says,

Speaker 2 and also, Valerie Bertinelli will be in the news segment with you. And I go, Valerie Bertinelli.
And

Speaker 2 I was telling Stephanie, I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so excited. Valerie Bertinelli.

Speaker 2 And Stephanie was like, she goes, Valerie Bertinelli was on the sitcom One Day at a Time and was married to Eddie Van Halen.

Speaker 1 Oh, this is your

Speaker 2 wheelhouse.

Speaker 2 This is 70s

Speaker 2 and rock and roll. I did a segment with her on Kelly Clarkson.
She's lovely. Okay.
Well, I was just like, oh, my gosh. And Stephanie was like, so you've never seen Diane Keaton in anything.

Speaker 2 And she's like, but like, you're like thoroughly familiar with Valerie Bertinelli. She's like,

Speaker 2 I can't track what

Speaker 2 it's pretty random.

Speaker 2 She was, you know, in my wheelhouse of the 70s and was married to my favorite rock and roll star.

Speaker 1 I will say Diane Keaton, very 70s as well.

Speaker 2 Absolutely. That's what I'm saying.
But Valerie also had the connection of rock and roll. Yeah,

Speaker 1 she was the thread that.

Speaker 2 Yeah. The fact that you know Pitbull and these people.

Speaker 2 Oh, God, I forgot. Music and documentaries.
That's where, yeah, that's where

Speaker 2 we're both doing Drew Barrymore next week. I know.

Speaker 1 I'm so nervous. I never met her.

Speaker 2 Oh, she's the best. She's cute.

Speaker 2 You're going to, and here's the thing. And I'm not entirely convinced she's not in love with me, but you will think that she's in love with me.
It's a dangerous truth. Yeah.
Dangerous quality to have.

Speaker 2 Anytime I see her interact, it's like she'll be in my face. I'm like, this woman is in love with me.

Speaker 2 And And then the

Speaker 2 PA walks up and is like, Drew, do you want, you know, pineapple, whatever. And she treats

Speaker 2 the PA the exact same.

Speaker 1 And that's good for you to remind me of that.

Speaker 2 So she's in love with me. Well, she ends up.
She did say recently she's bisexual, I believe.

Speaker 1 I think she's always been

Speaker 2 a pretty child.

Speaker 2 I mean, not for you.

Speaker 2 Taken. You made that very clear.

Speaker 2 Anyway, you will love her and you will think she's in love with you. And she probably, I think she's in love with me, you, and the PA.
And you. And me, too.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 She just says,

Speaker 1 I'm slowing out of her. And then Kelly.

Speaker 2 Kelly, of course, we're obsessed with her. She's asked the handsome.
Well, both of them have asked the handsome potty question. Yep, yep, yep.

Speaker 1 I'm excited.

Speaker 2 We'll have to party. Okay, I said hi.
Are you doing Colvert?

Speaker 1 No, I wish. I haven't done Seth Meyers.
I'd love to do Seth Meyers. Oh, okay.
Myers, but no, I think just those two. Okay.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Well, come on.
Oh, I'll show you party.

Speaker 2 Come, girl.

Speaker 2 I'm supposed to do it for. I'm in Zootopia, too, as a beaver.
Wait, we're so supposed to.

Speaker 1 So are we.

Speaker 2 Yeah. It's coming out soon.
As of this airing, the premiere is in like two days. Yes.
Are you going to go? I'm trying to.

Speaker 2 We're trying to get me off work. We got to go.

Speaker 2 Because

Speaker 2 I don't know if I'm going to be back from Toronto yet. Yeah.
Oh, girl. Don't.
Girl. Don't, girl.
Isn't there fault? Although the handsome pots and Zootopians?

Speaker 1 We're in a prison cell. The three of us? No, you and me.
And you're my cellmate, and you're bouncing me off the wall, and I'm a gerbil.

Speaker 2 Don't give away the things. Yeah, I didn't know it was.
Now nobody's going to go see the movie. What a spoiler.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 1 I've never been in a movie. And I'm a beaver.

Speaker 2 You're a beaver.

Speaker 1 I'm a gerbil and you're a bear, I think.

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 2 Take no.

Speaker 1 But I go in and

Speaker 1 I'm doing my lines. And then I said, so who's playing my cellmate? And they went, Tignotaro, actually.
I was like, you're joking.

Speaker 2 And you know what is so insane?

Speaker 2 I recorded that in Boulder right before I went over to Andrea's house. Oh, my God.
So when you're listening to my character, which is pure insanity,

Speaker 2 I lost my voice trying to do this. Wow.
Then I went over to be with Andrea in Andrea's Final Days. Oh, my God.
Our job is so weird. It's so bizarre.

Speaker 1 It comes out Thanksgiving weekend.

Speaker 2 I can't wait. It's soon.
It's yesterday.

Speaker 1 That'll be the first time I've ever been in a movie.

Speaker 2 The first time I've ever been.

Speaker 2 Did I say that weird?

Speaker 2 Well, not for where you come from.

Speaker 2 But nobody in North Carolina or Mississippi. I mean, listen, we say things weird all the time.
What would you say?

Speaker 1 First time I've ever been?

Speaker 2 Yeah, but it's

Speaker 2 ever been. This is our time.
Dynamic. Mean makes more sense since there's two E's.
Yeah, first time I've ever been.

Speaker 2 Should we get to our question?

Speaker 2 Today's question asker is,

Speaker 2 first and foremost,

Speaker 2 one of my dearest, dearest friends. I love her.

Speaker 2 She's an actor, comedian, and one half of the comedy duo Garfunkel and Oates. She has appeared in movies like Don't Think Twice and The Little Hours.

Speaker 2 and TV shows like The Big Bang Theory and Raising Hope. Kate Makuchi is asking today's question.
You know, I love Kate's last name

Speaker 2 because it talks about Macuchie. Let's get to the question.

Speaker 2 Hi, handsome.

Speaker 5 Hi, Tig. Hi, Fortune.
Hi, May. I love you.
It's me, Kate McCoochie, or as Fortune likes to call me, Kate,

Speaker 5 Kate Macooche, MyCoochie, Kate, MyCoochie, Kate McCooter, Macooder, whatever you want to call me.

Speaker 5 I love all the names.

Speaker 2 Anyway, I have a question for you.

Speaker 5 So here goes.

Speaker 5 What is a lie that you were told when you were a kid that you believed for way too long?

Speaker 5 So it might have been something that, you know, someone told you or something you saw in a movie or a TV show that you believed to be true for like way, way, way, way, way too long.

Speaker 5 And then maybe when you were older, you were like, what? That's not, that's not real.

Speaker 5 I'm a very gullible person, so I have a bunch of these. But I

Speaker 5 wondered what yours

Speaker 5 are. All right.
Thanks, everybody. I'll be back later.

Speaker 2 Oh, thanks, Kate McCooch.

Speaker 2 McCooter? McCuder

Speaker 2 Cooch?

Speaker 2 McCooter Cooch. I mean, Kate has the best last name ever.
You have to admit that. I mean, Kate's a great name, too.
What's wrong with her first name? Why are you being so hard on her first name?

Speaker 2 Well, I have to just, I mean, right away, what I was told as a child that I believed way too long, I think, is

Speaker 2 you'll be safe. We'll take care of you.
Everything's going to be okay.

Speaker 2 Don't worry. Got this.
You held on to that. I held on to it my whole childhood.
I was just waiting.

Speaker 2 When's this happening? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. That's a good one.

Speaker 2 Tissue, where you told me.

Speaker 2 I don't think they even tried to tell me that.

Speaker 2 I would say the first thing that comes to mind is

Speaker 2 I remember

Speaker 2 I was told at Christmastime that there were elves jumping from branch to branch.

Speaker 2 And I was always, I was like, where? And they'd be like, oh, you just missed it. Just how you're doing.
And so

Speaker 2 I just missed it. And

Speaker 2 I was just desperate to see these elves that were jumping around my Christmas tree.

Speaker 1 And you just accept it as fact, because why would someone say that?

Speaker 2 Well, Santa was coming too. I believe that.
I believe there were. I did believe the Santa lie for a long time.
Also,

Speaker 2 I don't know if you were

Speaker 2 when you put snacks out for Santa, did you also, it was for the reindeer, too? Uh-huh. And so what? Santa, because they leave like little crumbs.
Cookies and milk for Santa, a carrot for the reindeer.

Speaker 2 Right, but you see that

Speaker 1 the reindeer of eaten has eaten

Speaker 2 reindeer coming in? Right, so there's a little nibble. So, what, the reindeer are also in your house, or Santa brings it out, feeds the reindeer, and then puts the carrot back.

Speaker 2 But there's a food, there's a yeah, I mean, once you start picking it apart, there's a lot of logic behind it. I don't know, I think you just the carrots fly.

Speaker 1 He comes down to gym.

Speaker 2 I think the parents need to just start taking the carrot fully away. Yeah, I think you're right.
That's why the parents, when it's Santa doing it, okay. Okay.

Speaker 1 I was never allowed to believe in Santa. My mom was so adamant that they weren't going to lie to us.
And so

Speaker 2 I was like, oh, if you have kids, turn the podcast on the podcast on three minutes ago. Three minutes ago.
Spoiler alert.

Speaker 1 But she said there is no Santa Claus, but it's really fun to pretend. So I would still like leave out snacks.

Speaker 1 But I did, I was pretty depressed.

Speaker 1 I would tell kids that there was no Santa.

Speaker 2 Oh, you were that one. I was always the one that had to let everybody else know.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But there was one, there's one lie. And then I've talked about this in a stand-up special.
I don't know if I've talked about it on the pod, but that I still to this day don't know if it's true.

Speaker 1 And it drove me very nuts that my parents would always tell us, and they swore it was true, that in the 90s that they were driving through the forest and they drove underneath a moose.

Speaker 2 A moose, yeah. Oh,

Speaker 2 yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And they swore that the car clean passed through under its legs.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And my brother and I would become like incensed and irate.

Speaker 2 We'd be like, that doesn't seem possible.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then did all the math, googled the height of a Toyota Tercel, Googled the largest ever recorded moose.

Speaker 2 That's even a big one that still doesn't seem possible.

Speaker 1 This is the infuriating thing is

Speaker 2 it could just have happened.

Speaker 1 Like if it happened to be the biggest ever moose ever recorded.

Speaker 2 It could just have happened.

Speaker 1 So, and they stand by it to this day. They're like, yep,

Speaker 2 and they're both in on it.

Speaker 1 They have a twinkle in their eye when they say it, but they they won't let it go. So I still don't know.

Speaker 2 Oh, you know what? My mother also told me I got stuck in the toilet when I was that I fell in the toilet and she had to call the plumber to get me out.

Speaker 2 And I don't think that's true. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 She said when you were a baby?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think it was some like little joke that she kept going where I'd be like, what do you mean I got stuck in in the toilet?

Speaker 2 And then when I was older, I was like, I didn't get stuck in the toilet.

Speaker 1 You should write a children's book about a baby who's stuck in the toilet and gets flushed down and makes friends.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I apparently...
I'll do that. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Thomas, put that on my list. Toilet baby.
Yeah. Also, maybe

Speaker 2 to alert parents if their kids are listening. Also, they should have shut it off when you were talking about...

Speaker 1 Oh, the BDSC.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 But anyway, what were you going to say, Fortune? Apparently, I

Speaker 2 held on to my passy pacifier. Aw, say again.
My passy for many years, like long past when you were supposed to. But it was starting to create a little gap in my front teeth.
So the dentist...

Speaker 2 told my mom that they had to get rid of this pacifier, that I was way too old to be sucking on this thing.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 so

Speaker 2 one day it just disappeared. And my mom always told me for years that it just like got lost or something like that.
And they didn't know what happened to it.

Speaker 2 And then finally, she admitted when I was older that she threw it out, like threw it out the window.

Speaker 2 Out the window, she littered, she littered, ginger was driving after the dentist and just tossed it out the window, ginger Marie. Ginger Marie waste time.
She was like, Yeah, let's go.

Speaker 2 That was a big one. And then this one's kind of embarrassing.
That's here.

Speaker 2 My mom

Speaker 2 would call

Speaker 2 my mom. I don't know if this isn't a lie.
It's just more of like a random

Speaker 2 thing that she named something because she was too embarrassed to just use the anatomy terms. Here we go.
She would call the

Speaker 2 children's area. Cover your children's airs problem area.
She'd call it a boom boom.

Speaker 2 Come on, I call it anybody's problem area. Yeah,

Speaker 2 Well, for girls, it was called your boom boom.

Speaker 1 So she'd go, did you wash your boom boom?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. And so.
Why was she so fixated on your boom boom? Well, no, just like,

Speaker 2 you know, sometimes you, instead of just saying vagina, she would say boom boom. Fortunate Marie.
I got way too old saying

Speaker 2 boom boom. Yeah, and I was over at a friend's house

Speaker 2 and whose dad's a doctor, so they've always used, you know, just the regular anatomy terms. Yeah.
And I surfed, I don't know why, I said something about, and I said, boom, boom.

Speaker 2 And they, it's like a record scratch.

Speaker 2 And they all turned and were like,

Speaker 2 what? Oh, my God. And I was like,

Speaker 2 you're boom boom. Oh, they're like, are you talking about a vagina? And I was like, huh? And they were like,

Speaker 2 I honestly don't know if I even had heard the word vagina before. I was like, huh?

Speaker 2 Boom boom. And they all died laughing.
Oh. And I was just like.

Speaker 1 I'm picturing you storming into your home.

Speaker 2 No, no, my mom

Speaker 2 is not caught up boom boom.

Speaker 2 And so if you ever got into

Speaker 2 PDSM, would you,

Speaker 2 could somebody use like a word like that?

Speaker 2 Boom boom.

Speaker 2 It's not very taken.

Speaker 1 If you go, I'm going to bang your boom boom.

Speaker 2 No, nobody wants to hear that word. It's so stupid.
I'm like, how did you come up with that? And how did she come up with that? I don't know. I should ask her.

Speaker 2 I mean, it's, you know, I think it was just like light and fun. Yeah, people call it.

Speaker 2 I get it. I get it.
But where did Boom Boom come?

Speaker 2 I will have to fall. Like, why not boom? I will have to follow.
I'm going to talk with Ginger about this.

Speaker 1 It sounds like it's from like a like, who's that?

Speaker 2 Mr. Lova Lova.
Like,

Speaker 2 like a boom boom.

Speaker 1 Shaggy. Yeah, it sounds like it's a Shaggy guy.

Speaker 2 I love Shaggy. I love Shaggy.
Love Shaggy. You don't? Yeah, but like, no Diane Keaton.

Speaker 2 Oh. Oh, but you love Shaggy.
I love Shaggy.

Speaker 2 But those

Speaker 2 aren't hand in hand.

Speaker 2 Okay, sure.

Speaker 2 Valerie Burtonelli. Yeah, but that one.
Shaggy. That burst my bubble big time when my friends were just like, the fuck.
They just say that.

Speaker 1 It's funny how your brain plants little flags on all the embarrassing moments.

Speaker 2 And yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I love an embarrassing story. Oh, man.
Those are good. People love them.
People love them. Our listeners are salivating to hear your embarrassing stories.

Speaker 2 I feel like I don't have a ton of embarrassing stories just because I didn't get embarrassed often.

Speaker 2 You got to fix that one for sure. What do you suppose made you somebody that's like, yeah, I don't care.
That doesn't embarrass me. I don't know how that happened.

Speaker 1 Was it because you were going for laughs? So you were

Speaker 2 like, I saw the comedy and stuff early on. Yeah.
But I was just like, worth it. And have you since shared with people you've dated or whatever

Speaker 2 about your boom boom? No, this is on the first time. It's the first time I've ever mentioned this.

Speaker 1 I was hanging out with, well, with Parvity and... Ama, who's seven now, and we went to see a soccer game where it's like a little nice little reunion.

Speaker 2 And we were playing. Professional Professional soccer? Yeah, Angel City.
Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Which I've never been.

Speaker 2 Oh, that was a fun game.

Speaker 1 Oh, it was super fun.

Speaker 2 Wait, why'd you say Ben this time?

Speaker 1 Did I say Ben this time? Yeah.

Speaker 2 I've never been. You said I've never been.
Oh, I don't want to change you. Be who you are.
I know.

Speaker 1 I just. Maybe I go, I use both.

Speaker 2 I've never. Because I say word.

Speaker 2 With this thick accent, I say words wrong or not wrong, but different. All the different.
No, they're wrong. They're wrong.

Speaker 1 So we were playing Truth or Dare.

Speaker 1 And so so Ama dared me to stand up and yell like well first she said stand up take your shirt off and yell and yell like Angel City are my team forever and so I didn't take my shirt off but I did the dare and I got up and yelled and I did like a dance and it was so she was so shocked that I'd done it and because everyone turned around and then we were daring each other to do embarrassing things and I was like God is because when when the embarrassment starts to creep in around middle school, right?

Speaker 1 Like before that, you're kind of, I don't know. And I was like, God, I hope, yeah, I hope she never gets embarrassed by anything.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did Max and Finn get embarrassed?

Speaker 1 Embarrassed by you? Like, are they like, God, don't say that?

Speaker 2 No, more so. Like, Max is really into jokes, writing jokes and stuff.
And

Speaker 2 if I, I mean, he, he hits it almost every time where I'm like, God, that's a really funny concept or really observant.

Speaker 2 But if he or Finn Finn do something that is not funny, I'll go, don't tell anyone you're related to me, guys.

Speaker 2 Don't throw my name around with that one. Okay.

Speaker 2 But yeah, no, they're really, really funny. Yeah.
Well, should we hear?

Speaker 1 Yeah, let's hear Kate's answer.

Speaker 2 Let's do it. Mikuchi, what you got?

Speaker 5 Okay, so my answer is,

Speaker 5 you know, in Pee-Wee's big adventure, when Pee-Wee picks up the fugitive, Mickey, and he's still got handcuffs tied to his hand, and Pee-Wee's like, so what did you do?

Speaker 5 And Mickey's like, oh, you know, those tags on the mattresses that say, do not remove under penalty of law? Well, I took one off of a mattress.

Speaker 5 And so, you know, I saw this movie when I was maybe six or seven, and I...

Speaker 5 for a very long time, most of my childhood and into my adulthood, thought that taking a tag off of a mattress was like a really bad crime.

Speaker 5 And it wasn't until I was like way grown up, probably like 30, I re-watched Peewee's Big Adventure and I was watching it and I thought, oh my God, that's just a joke. That's a joke.

Speaker 5 I have been thinking that it's bad to do this my whole life.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 5 it was just a, yeah.

Speaker 5 You know. So yeah, I guess it's okay.
You're not going to go to jail if you take a tag off a mattress.

Speaker 5 And that's just something I learned way too late in life all right everyone have a great day thanks so much for having me I can't wait to hear hear this okay I guess well now I'm just talking um oh also you know that time that Tig was talking about where where

Speaker 5 the the

Speaker 5 we were out in Australia and the um the kangaroo uh we were hanging out with the kangaroos and um

Speaker 5 There one part that I think Tig didn't explain is that a kangaroo charged at her. Like it wasn't just like we were hanging out with these big kangaroos.
One was like out of the corner of my eye.

Speaker 5 I heard it first. I heard the kangaroo.
Broom, broom, broom, broom. And then I looked and it was like the biggest kangaroo just charging toward Tig.
Oh my gosh. And all I could get out of my

Speaker 5 mouth was a tiny, aunt cheese tick.

Speaker 5 And thankfully,

Speaker 5 the kangaroo just kept going and didn't bother us or hurt us in any way. But that's just a little tidbit.
All right, I love you. Bye-bye.

Speaker 2 Love you, Kate. That's a little tidbit.
A little tidbit. I wish she had said, Macuche out.

Speaker 1 I can't believe you left out that you were charged.

Speaker 2 I forgot. You know, my memory is very spotty.
Yeah, but neither were kangaroos. And she did.
We have it on video somewhere because

Speaker 2 you just hear like

Speaker 2 and then you hear Kate, oh, cheese tick. Cheese touch.
It's a classic Kate McCoochie.

Speaker 2 And of course,

Speaker 2 Kate's biggest fear, like it's just right on the nose with Kate McCooci, that she was scared that that would be like the biggest crime to take that tag off of a pillow. So funny.
You know?

Speaker 1 That's so funny to hold on to that.

Speaker 2 And the weird thing about Kate is she is...

Speaker 2 Very, she's so kind. She's so pure and wonderful and all of these things.
So talented.

Speaker 2 But man, can she go blue really because i'd love to hear it because her voice is so innocent have you not heard garfunklin oats no i need may

Speaker 2 martin okay great because i'm

Speaker 2 martin

Speaker 2 come on i mean yeah it's just like she and ricky singing the bluest craziest funniest stuff that's great and also her solo stuff and she's such a great painter yeah incredible artist yeah incredible artist.

Speaker 2 Yeah, incredible friend. Just a wonderful person.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And a great last name.
Mm-hmm. Back to that.
Back to the old.

Speaker 2 Well, what a fun episode. I have a whole grand old time.
So great seeing you guys.

Speaker 1 So great seeing you guys.

Speaker 2 We have to do this again sooner. We've got to do this again.
We will.

Speaker 2 We should quit our other jobs. Just do what you do.

Speaker 1 Just live in this studio.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I'd be happy to do that.
I got cold brew here. Yeah.
That's all you need. Well, for now, though, I do have to go on tour.
Okay. Okay.
So I will be free to go. Sorry to bother you.

Speaker 2 I will be in Charlotte, North Carolina, Thanksgiving weekend.

Speaker 2 Then San Jose and Fresno, California.

Speaker 2 St. Petersburg in Orlando, Florida.
Vancouver. And then New Year's Eve in Seattle.
Come celebrate the new year with me. And then Zootobia 2.
See all three of us. Or here, all three of us.

Speaker 2 Thanksgiving weekend as well.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, I can't wait.

Speaker 2 And please make a note. November 14th.
This week, come see me in the good light. The documentary I produced about Andrea Gibson and Megan Fally

Speaker 2 is so beautiful. And it's out on Apple TV November 14th.
November 14th. November 14th.
Tell your friends, everyone. Also go to TigNotaro.com for all my show information.

Speaker 1 And I'm going on tour at the end of February, doing 35 cities in North America. Please come and hang out with me.
And then I'm in LA at Largo this month. So check that out.

Speaker 1 And check out Wayward on Netflix.

Speaker 2 I'm at Largo too. Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2 It's my regular spot. You guys.

Speaker 2 You guys.

Speaker 2 Until next time,

Speaker 2 keep it handsome.

Speaker 1 Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feemster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willette.

Speaker 1 Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsome pod.

Speaker 2 What a podcast! What a podcast! What a podcast!

Speaker 1 That was a head gun podcast.

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Speaker 4 What's going on? It's Lamorne Morris.

Speaker 6 And Hannah Simone.

Speaker 4 And we host The Mess Around, a New Girl Rewatch podcast now on Headgum. Now here's the thing.
Every single week we chat about an episode of New Girl, and we really get into it.

Speaker 4 Like, we get up in there. We get up in there.
You know, we reminisce about our times on set. We share behind the scenes tea.
We react to re-watching episodes that we haven't seen in years.

Speaker 4 We talk about how Jake Johnson is dog f ⁇ .

Speaker 6 That's not true. We talk about so many memories we have of working with the biggest stars on the planet.
I'm talking Prince, Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo.

Speaker 4 We're just two BFFs having a a good old time, okay? Sometimes we even talk to other co-stars like Zoe Deschanel, Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, and Damon Waynes Jr.

Speaker 4 And your dad, we talk to your dad on this show as well.

Speaker 6 Make sure you subscribe to the Mess Around wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes drop every single Tuesday.