Sinbad of the Seven Seas LIVE! w/ Jessica St. Clair

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Speaker 11 If you don't like this movie, blame Edgar Allan Poe.

Speaker 11 We saw Simbad of the Seven Seas, so you know what that means.

Speaker 11 J-Lin, big ball, and the beautiful June. Gonna tip you from the boom, all the way to the room.
Ran to get the street fighter, help to blow off steam.

Speaker 11 Just to suck a punch to iron life for Timothy's green. Y'all the third team, how we stayin' alive.
They call me when they're badass and he's on the line. Crankin' 88 minutes, cause they cool as ice.

Speaker 11 Cause they bad Jim Barney looking kind and nice. All his dudes getting literal.
Jason is getting lame. Jules making sure all the monkey shots in the pain.

Speaker 11 They're just a bunch of movies while they make it in the grave. Here's a real question for you.
Out of this kid, pain.

Speaker 11 Hello, people of Earth. Hello, people of boys.

Speaker 11 We are live at the Tree Fort Music Festival to talk about a little film called Simbad of the Seven Seas

Speaker 11 which shockingly came out in 1989

Speaker 11 1989

Speaker 11 one year before 1990

Speaker 11 just want you to pull that all together I'm out of breath trying to break out of that cage

Speaker 11 I got a lot more respect for Lufrigno.

Speaker 11 IMDb describes this movie as, Simbad and his shipmates and a young prince must battle an evil wizard to gain a hand of a beautiful princess. Kind of.

Speaker 12 I don't know.

Speaker 11 Doesn't feel exactly like it's catching it. Kind of seems like Simbad goes on an adventure, he cuts to get some jewels, and sometimes plots are just completely dropped.

Speaker 11 Like mentioning the prince is offensive to me

Speaker 11 because I rewatched the end of this movie four times just just to make sure I didn't miss that the prince is not there.

Speaker 11 The Prince ceases to exist. Oh, by the way, if you've not watched this movie, it's completely ADR'd, which means that no dialogue was recorded on set.

Speaker 11 A little child is voiced by what I would say is a 30-year-old woman.

Speaker 11 And just in case you're wondering, we'll get into this a little bit later. This is not based on any Edgar Allan Poe story that we can find.

Speaker 11 I mean, yes, he wrote a story, but this is not based on that.

Speaker 11 Tagline is,

Speaker 11 he must conquer evil on land

Speaker 11 and at sea.

Speaker 11 Okay, again,

Speaker 11 not too exciting of a tagline. There is no box office.
There is no domestic gross. This came straight to DVD, videotape, whatever it was, thrown out with the trash at one point.

Speaker 11 And we are lucky enough to get it. Now we are going to break down this movie, every beat of it, and there are a lot of beats.
But first, let me welcome my co-host. Please welcome to the stage, Mr.

Speaker 11 Jason Manzugas.

Speaker 11 What's up, jerks?

Speaker 11 Let's go.

Speaker 11 Let's go, boise.

Speaker 11 There's a boat outside we're all going to see.

Speaker 11 It's happening.

Speaker 11 Oh, I'm out of breath now.

Speaker 11 I am too. I don't know what it is.

Speaker 11 I thought that was just a Denver thing. I don't like it.
Equally out of breath for doing nothing like what's happening.

Speaker 11 They're gonna die on this tour. Wow, wow, wow.
Look at us. Look at us.

Speaker 11 Brand new. Brand new city.
Boise, baby.

Speaker 11 I believe the only city on this tour we have never been to. Yeah.
Right?

Speaker 11 You better fucking bring it, Boise.

Speaker 11 You better fucking bring it.

Speaker 11 So many people say,

Speaker 11 so many people say, no one comes to Boise. And we said, we will come to Boise.

Speaker 11 We will come,

Speaker 11 Boise.

Speaker 11 By the way, love these doppelgangers. Oh, they are amazing.
We got a

Speaker 11 home run doppelganger. Oh, hold on.
Let me, the doppelgangers were great, but watch this. Jafar, are you still here?

Speaker 11 Whoa!

Speaker 11 Oh, wow. And Jason,

Speaker 11 my only note, the guy overacted more. You could have overacted.

Speaker 11 So, Jason, Paul, has this movie ever come across your...

Speaker 11 Wow. Yeah.
Wow. Never once, right?

Speaker 11 But this bears such a striking resemblance to a movie I saw as a child, which was Lou Farigno playing Hercules. Yes.

Speaker 11 It's the movie where he throws a bear into space and it becomes the star constellation Ursa Major. Which, didn't we do that on this show? Did we? Yes.
We did? Yes.

Speaker 11 Okay, then I also, then I must have told this story about seeing it as a child then. We'll tell it again.
I don't care. I saw it as a child.
We all walked out.

Speaker 11 So I did have a moment at the beginning where I was like, hang on, wait a minute. And then I was like, oh, whoa.
This is a full-on other Lou Ferigno crazo.

Speaker 11 And the fact that you just said that the Edgar Allan Poe at the beginning was a lie is blowing my mind. Well, not a lie, but it's not.
It's fiction. Well, it is.
Edgar Allan Poe never existed. True.

Speaker 11 That's what you said. And all the stories written by him.
Look it up. All the stories written by him were written by Marlowe.
That's exactly right. Oh, not a big, not a big Marlowe audience.

Speaker 11 Interesting. Interesting, Boise, for a city that on its library has an exclamation point.

Speaker 11 That's right.

Speaker 11 That's right. Library! Yeah, we'll get into the Edgar Allan Poe of it all in a second.

Speaker 11 But before we do, let's bring out our very special co-host, a person who has been subjected to so many abs and so many pecs on this tour. And I feel like...

Speaker 11 I think we should maybe rename this tour the Beefcake Tour. I mean,

Speaker 11 it is shaping up to be that. Please welcome Jessica St.
Clair.

Speaker 11 Welcome. Hi, guys.
Let's go. Yeah!

Speaker 11 Jessica.

Speaker 11 Jessica, Jessica. Yes.

Speaker 11 Is this your first time seeing a Lou Ferrigno film?

Speaker 13 So Lou Farigno was briefly my neighbor.

Speaker 13 He lived on my block.

Speaker 11 He had four tiny dogs,

Speaker 13 which he walked.

Speaker 11 What era, like what general, how, how, like, somewhat recently?

Speaker 13 Yeah, like 10 years ago.

Speaker 11 Nine years ago?

Speaker 13 Oh, that's cool. Anyway, so

Speaker 13 what was confusing to me about this film is this is the type of movie that was like around when my sexual awakening was happening as a young girl.

Speaker 11 Which was when?

Speaker 11 89. 89? When is that?

Speaker 13 So when was, how old was I? 17.

Speaker 11 17? No. No, no, no.

Speaker 11 Yeah, 10, 11.

Speaker 13 So Flash Gordon, people tying people up, you know, casting spells. This type of stuff got me.

Speaker 11 People tying people up, casting spells.

Speaker 11 Like, these are two very different kinks.

Speaker 13 It's like a different time.

Speaker 13 Maybe it's space, maybe it's not. Maybe it's the olden days, maybe it's not.

Speaker 11 No, no, movies were hornier. They are.
are movies were hornier. Kids these days, they don't know how to be horny because the movies aren't telling them.

Speaker 13 That's right.

Speaker 11 We're not getting enough.

Speaker 11 We're not getting enough horny movies. I mean, there was a whole

Speaker 11 level or a whole genre of movies that were just like sex crime, right? It was just like, that's it. She fucks them and kills them.

Speaker 13 Silk stockings, you know?

Speaker 11 And we had to. Wait a minute.
That's Skinnamax. Okay.

Speaker 13 But we had to find these things

Speaker 13 on basic cable. You You know what I mean? We had to find it on a Saturday at 2 a.m.

Speaker 11 Now our sex symbol is Mr. Beast.

Speaker 11 Who the fuck is Mr. Beast? Who St.
Clair just said who's Mr. Beast? Who's Mr.
Beast? That's mind-blowing because even I know who Mr. Beast is and I'm a fucking idiot.

Speaker 13 Who's Mr. Beast?

Speaker 11 Mr. Beast is, well, he's got a big reality show on.
He's an enormous YouTube personality who does like stunty things. Like if you can stand in one place for 46 days,

Speaker 11 I'll give you $5 $5 million. Nothing.
No, but then my joke is that he's not sexy.

Speaker 13 Okay, well, if you have to explain your joke, it's not funny.

Speaker 11 Well, St. Clair, it was based on that you would know who he was.

Speaker 11 Halfway through the tour, St. Clair doesn't give a fuck.

Speaker 11 Also, St. Clair shows up to shows having not talked to anyone all day.

Speaker 11 And then it's straight nuts.

Speaker 13 I know. And I like to go up to everyone's spouse is like, anybody fight today? Because I'm all alone.
I'm like, yeah, it sounds really annoying. Fight more.
Anyway,

Speaker 13 so what I was saying is when I saw this film, to be honest,

Speaker 13 deep in my loins, there was a stirring.

Speaker 11 Wow.

Speaker 11 There was. Well, this is a horny movie.
It is a horny movie. It's a horny movie.
And also, it's got like a oiled up, jacked,

Speaker 11 hairless for you.

Speaker 13 Which I love.

Speaker 11 I know. I'm reminding you.
Which I love.

Speaker 13 And not the thin waist we saw last night with the barbarian brothers.

Speaker 11 He's pretty proportionate.

Speaker 13 But at the same time, I'm juggling that with watching him walk his elderly pugs. You know, so there's a lot of different things.

Speaker 11 Because he's still a big guy. Like, he's not, he didn't lose the muscle.

Speaker 13 No, he didn't. Would you? He's a wonderful husband and spouse.
I used to stare in at them while they were eating dinner. Think, like, how does he sit in those tiny chairs?

Speaker 11 Would you talk to him? Would you say hello?

Speaker 13 Just a little smile, a little Mona Lisa smile.

Speaker 11 What do you mean?

Speaker 13 Just like a little, hmm.

Speaker 11 I see you.

Speaker 11 So, anyway. Now what happens if one day he comes knocking at your door? This is older Lou Frigno wants to borrow something, you know, maybe some protein or whey.

Speaker 11 And, you know, a cup of whey.

Speaker 13 A cup of whey powder.

Speaker 11 Can I have a cup of whey?

Speaker 11 You've just gotten out of the shower. No one else is home.
Do you invite Lou in? Do you invite Lou into your house?

Speaker 13 I'd give Lou a roll in the hay for sure.

Speaker 11 I would.

Speaker 13 I have to tell you, I kind of enjoyed the film.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

Speaker 11 I did.

Speaker 11 I don't know why.

Speaker 11 I'll say this: once again, and I'm so grateful, this tour has been very enjoyable movies, with the exception of Cravens that are not too long. Right.
This went down smooth.

Speaker 13 It went down smooth.

Speaker 13 You could do your makeup while you're watching it. You know, you can put in hot rollers, you know, while you're watching it.

Speaker 13 But yeah, so anyway, that's a lot of conflicting feelings, but it's bringing back something, you know, very primal in me.

Speaker 11 Well, it's glit-so glad then that you were able to watch it alone in a hotel room.

Speaker 11 Now, is that why you got kicked out of that hotel?

Speaker 11 Now, I just want to talk about the Edgar Allan Poe of it all. Let's pull up, let's pull up one of these stills here.
We can pull up still one. Okay.
This is the title screen that we see.

Speaker 13 Did anybody else feel like Edgar Allan Poe has Jason's eyes? Show me. Show them.

Speaker 13 Show them. Look out with your weird eyes.
Look out.

Speaker 13 Does anybody see that resemblance?

Speaker 13 Am I right?

Speaker 11 Would you call them sexy eyes? Nope.

Speaker 13 Creep, creep eyes.

Speaker 11 Creep eyes. Hunky eyes? Creep eyes.
Now, I will say, when the Edgar Allan Poe picture arrived, I was like, oh, maybe this is the production company, like Poe Productions.

Speaker 11 It's like, oh, no, okay, we're getting a little history about Edgar Allan Poe. Don't know how this connects to Simbad at all.
And then we get to slide two.

Speaker 11 You know, we're learning a little bit about him. We're seeing that, you know, he is the inventor of, you know, various literary trends like thrillers and science fiction.

Speaker 11 And we get to side three here, which, you know, kind of sets up that he wrote this book, The Thousand and Second Tale of, and this is the word I will not be able to say. Shahirazad.
Sheherazad. Now,

Speaker 14 here's the thing.

Speaker 11 No similarity can be found between the plot of that tale. and this story.

Speaker 11 If anything. Is it a Sinbad story, though? Is the title the same? It says no similarity can be found between its plot and the story.

Speaker 11 It says it does borrow many elements from the 1940 film The Thief of Baghdad. Okay.
So I feel like

Speaker 11 they stole from something else, but they kind of put you off the path.

Speaker 13 Yeah, or maybe they were trying to legitimize it to say this is a family film and not the jerk-off fest that it obviously is for people. But wait a second.

Speaker 11 I don't think that Edgar Allan Poe screams family film.

Speaker 11 Well,

Speaker 11 I felt like this was an effort to make this movie feel like it had more gravitas or more weight. That it's like, oh, this isn't just

Speaker 11 a beefcake sinbad movie with like cheesy nonsense. This is based on an Edgar Allan Poe story, which check your records is pretty important.

Speaker 11 And then it's like, no, this is Lou Ferrigno doing absolute, like, knocking down

Speaker 11 dozens of bad guys holding as a weapon one of the bad guys. Yeah.

Speaker 11 Which we need more of in our movies. More horny people and more bad guys as weapons.
Yes. Now I want to cut to slide five here because this is where I knew we were off the rails.
And this is it.

Speaker 11 That's how they end the opening crawl.

Speaker 11 Edgar Allan Poe doesn't look happy to be here. I've never seen something that's like, this is based on a true story.

Speaker 11 And

Speaker 11 here it is, you motherfucker. Enjoy it.
Like, they serve it. Like, this has an energy to it.

Speaker 11 If I was the Edgar Allan Poe estate, I would sue Canon Films. Please don't, though.
We love Canon. We love it.
When I saw that this was a Canon movie, I was like, oh, thank God.

Speaker 11 Well, I knew it was a Canon movie when I saw, let's just cut to clip number one here, the ADR in the film. Here, take a look at.
Wow.

Speaker 11 Now, if you're listening, just know that these voices do not match. This is clip number one, and you'll just get a little taste of the voices in this movie.

Speaker 11 Starts off Princess Bride style, mom telling a daughter story.

Speaker 15 I'll read you a story. It's a very strange story, but you'll have to promise me you'll go to sleep afterwards.

Speaker 11 I promise.

Speaker 11 I hope you love it. I promise.

Speaker 11 Mommy, what happens to Sinbad? Mommy,

Speaker 11 I promise, mommy. Mother, I doubt you.
I promise. I'm a young girl, and I promise you.
This is basically the voice used in The Exorcist. Yes.
I am so disturbed by this little girl's room.

Speaker 11 First of all, it looks like she's living in a dorm. Some sheet is just put up on the wall, a blue sheet.

Speaker 11 And I don't know if we could rewind it, but there is also a headshot, which is clearly the daughter's headshot.

Speaker 13 Oh. Okay.
Like when they cast her.

Speaker 11 Yeah, and they're like, they're like, oh, well, people won't know it's a headshot. They'll just think it's a picture.
Right. Her own headshot adorns her bed.
That is a weird choice.

Speaker 11 So, this movie is, I will say this: there isn't a single normal choice in the movie.

Speaker 11 This movie is wall-to-wall weird choice.

Speaker 13 But that's why I think it's great.

Speaker 11 Absolutely.

Speaker 13 Because there's not even one normal, nobody's trying to have a normal scene. No.
This is an insane, it's an hour and a half-long bedtime story.

Speaker 11 Oh, yeah. Oh, okay.
Where the moment 1:30 a.m. by the time she's done.
It's like sunrise has happened. I think she's just like

Speaker 13 her eyes are bleeding.

Speaker 11 Like, what happens next?

Speaker 11 When do I get to sleep? Clearly, the director saw Princess Bride and was like, I got it, but wouldn't it be more interesting if the narration never stopped? Wait, so you know? And

Speaker 11 the mom goes off track multiple times. Like, well, mommy, what's going on? And she's like, well, I think that he just felt that he wasn't into that.
And she was probably like, I don't know.

Speaker 11 She's just riffing oh the like daughter reading the daughter at a certain point should absolutely have been like this story this story has narrative problems yeah this story has this story has act three problems

Speaker 11 I don't understand what's the all hope is lost moment yeah what I mean the daughter I was confused when I had to write down all the names it's like we have the Viking we have Poochie we have Sinbad we have the bald cook

Speaker 11 the bald cook and poochie let's be honest are useless.

Speaker 11 And why?

Speaker 13 The bald cook looks like he's got a couple guns on him. He could do something.

Speaker 11 He just hides. The bald cook, at the only time in the movie where they eat,

Speaker 11 the Poochie comes out and is like, I made dinner.

Speaker 11 Well, why wasn't the bald cook making dinner? Is Poochie from The Simpsons? Poochie is the dog, the cool dog from The Simpsons. Okay, cool.

Speaker 11 Just making sure. Yeah, and when Poochie, Poochie P, I believe.
And when

Speaker 11 Pooch, Poochie does find

Speaker 11 my favorite part of the movie where Poochie does overhear Jafar talking to a mirror, which is not possessed. He's just talking into a mirror.

Speaker 11 He's not having any larger conversations. No.

Speaker 11 And then

Speaker 11 we watch the scene. Poochie hears him, then goes out and then repeats it.
And then there's also voiceovers like, this is the plot. We're underlining this is what's going on.

Speaker 13 Don't be confused. Well, and I appreciate that because then we go on some tangents and some side steps.

Speaker 11 Well, the whole movie is just a series of quests, right?

Speaker 11 It's a vignette. It's like he's at the beginning of the movie, Jafar scatters.
Also, we don't even start the quest for like so long. No.

Speaker 11 You know, I was like, so anyway, Jafar sends all these gems all over the place. And so now they've got to go and recollect the gems and bring them back, blah, blah, blah.
So that's the whole movie.

Speaker 11 They just go on one thing after another, and they always fight him. Some sort of a guy in a big rubber suit who's either supposed to be rocks or slime or it's the same actor

Speaker 11 for sure. Same

Speaker 11 every time. The movie is going at a clip until they get to the island of the dead, and then it's like, you know what? Let's chill out here for an hour.
Okay, let me ask you this.

Speaker 11 Every other quest, five, ten minutes. Let me ask you this because the island of the dead made me think of it.
Is what is what?

Speaker 11 I wish we had cut back to the mom telling the story right as he shoves his hand into the king of the dead's chest,

Speaker 11 Pulls out his heart, which has his face on it.

Speaker 13 Yep.

Speaker 11 Like, what's the story she's telling the little girl?

Speaker 13 Squeezes it. Green goo comes out of it.

Speaker 11 Yes. And Sim had a punch straight through his chest.
Like, the daughter would be like, what?

Speaker 11 Yeah, like, don't worry, daughter. His heart was in the shape of his own face, but that's the way the Legion of Death have their own hearts, like Mini Mis.
Austin Powers, I read the script.

Speaker 11 It's coming out soon.

Speaker 11 Does my heart have a face, mommy?

Speaker 11 Why would your heart?

Speaker 11 Why would your heart have your own face? I mean,

Speaker 11 I say that as someone who was one of the actors in a movie called Meet Dave, where Eddie Murphy was the captain of a spaceship that looked like Eddie Murphy. That makes sense, David.

Speaker 11 It makes some sense. It does.

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Speaker 13 Did anybody was anybody disturbed by how much Jafar and the and the king, the whatever his name is, look like the Aladdin characters?

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 13 Did they rip him off?

Speaker 11 No, no, these are all characters that are in one,

Speaker 13 But they look exactly like the drawings.

Speaker 11 Right, but the drawings are basically. I had a landline.

Speaker 13 Yes.

Speaker 11 You think Aladdin ripped this movie off?

Speaker 13 I'm really concerned. Is anyone else?

Speaker 11 Is anyone else concerned?

Speaker 11 They look exactly the same.

Speaker 11 I feel like there's, when you go out there, I feel like some smart person, maybe there's a librarian in the audience, is going to explain what's going on. Wait, you mean a librarian?

Speaker 11 Yeah!

Speaker 11 Library!

Speaker 13 There's always a librarian in the audience.

Speaker 11 Anyway, I think that's very disturbing. No, you were right.
It definitely reminded me very much of Aladdin because I think it does steal from the story that Aladdin was based on.

Speaker 11 Now, you do bring up Jafar, which is by far the best performance.

Speaker 13 By Jafar, the best performance.

Speaker 11 Jafar, in a way, the best performance.

Speaker 11 Jafar brings it and is only knocked off his perch for, and we'll talk about her in a little bit, by Sucra.

Speaker 11 Sucra? Okay, now, so this is interesting because we've talked extensively about how the movie is all ADR, which is additional recording,

Speaker 11 whatever, dialogue recording, which is recorded after. So in almost every scene in this movie, they are not capturing sound on set, right? Which is a normal thing for Italian productions.
Yes, extra.

Speaker 11 Yes. Yes.
Like all the spaghetti westerns are dubbed. Everything's dubbed.
Except for

Speaker 11 the scenes

Speaker 11 on set. Yes.
So Sucra and Jafar are talking.

Speaker 11 Those are their voices. And those scenes, as a result, are incredible.
I mean, because Sucra's like, what's up?

Speaker 11 I'm Sucra. I'm here.
Let's do this. Sucra walked out of like Gold's Gym on Venice Beach into

Speaker 13 glamorous ladies of wrestling.

Speaker 11 I was like, fuck that.

Speaker 11 There's a red Sonia here. Let's fucking do this.

Speaker 11 i'm coming for him i'll get him and i was so excited to see sukra's fight never happens never i know heart broke she literally the movie says she's like i want to fight him and i'm like would have loved to see it would have don't come

Speaker 13 wasn't ready for it well also they weren't ready for a woman to fight

Speaker 11 sinbad doesn't even fight jafar yeah

Speaker 11 Sinbad fights himself. I thought at one point, I was like, maybe I missed Jafar turning Sucra into Sinbad.
But no, he just turns Air into Sinbad because he could have also turned himself.

Speaker 11 Wouldn't it have been great if when Sinbad shows up, Jafar is first like, Sucra, get him. So we get a

Speaker 11 big battle scene. That would have been a big fight scene.
Yeah. I loved Sucra.
I love Jafar. Everybody is, I think, incredible in this.

Speaker 11 With the possible exception of, what's going on with Viking Warrior?

Speaker 11 What's this guy's deal?

Speaker 11 He does not talk full stop.

Speaker 13 Yeah. He has a few lines, and his accent is all over the place.

Speaker 11 All over the place. And he is constantly getting his ass kicked.
Well, how old is he? He's the warrior. Is he old? Oh, I think he's old.

Speaker 13 I think he might be older.

Speaker 11 Well, here's my thought. My thought is this.
They're coming back from an exciting journey. We don't know what that journey was.
And he's like, finally, take some time off. Some RNR.

Speaker 11 Yeah, and he's like, I got to go back. Some weight off the joints.
And I feel like he just is, you're seeing him suffer from like, it's like almost when basketball players play like a back-to-back.

Speaker 11 It's like he's playing a little tired. I feel like he's definitely carrying that energy.
The only people, worthwhile people I feel like, on this team are the Chinese Soldier of Fortune and Sinbad.

Speaker 11 Yes. They are.
And Poochie. And Little Books.
Poochie. Poochie's incredible, but Poochie and the bald cook are always like...
Poochie's a rat.

Speaker 11 We got to get the little rat in there to figure out what's going on. Poochie's great.
I wish they'd used Poochie more, but they keep... That's what I couldn't figure out.

Speaker 11 Like, they spend all this time putting the team together, like it's Fellowship of the Rings, and then they're like, okay, there's bad guys.

Speaker 11 poochie bald cook you guys hide in the boat we're gonna go over here and all separate and then everybody gets either captured or turned into like they're always getting captured they're always getting captured they love getting captured and tied up

Speaker 11 yeah i i do

Speaker 11 there is a moment early on where they come back to baskar and they they are they're in there you know they're in the castle they're being held uh captive loufrigno is down in the dungeon And when this scene happens, when Lou Frigno talks to a snake, like...

Speaker 13 He's so validating.

Speaker 21 Who hurt you?

Speaker 11 Who hurt you?

Speaker 13 And for that age, at 89, for him to know how to validate another person's experience and to say, I see you, snake.

Speaker 11 But is it anyway?

Speaker 13 I understand you're afraid. Those are the 10 things we're supposed to talk to our kids like now.

Speaker 11 I'm just saying that he would rather validate the snakes than the women in this movie. Wow.

Speaker 11 Jason, you are an America's hero.

Speaker 13 Why you're still single, nobody knows.

Speaker 13 You think?

Speaker 11 Nobody knows. Here's what I will say.

Speaker 11 I felt like, wow, he really gets these snakes. We should actually watch a clip of that.
That's

Speaker 11 clip three. Please.
I need your help.

Speaker 11 Come here. He's got a real connection with this snake.

Speaker 22 Yeah, he does.

Speaker 14 Nervous, huh?

Speaker 11 Nervous, huh?

Speaker 23 I know where you're coming from.

Speaker 13 This is what he'd talk like this if we were on a date.

Speaker 11 No, it'd be like right before sex.

Speaker 11 Well, to me, I felt like he was grooming.

Speaker 13 Yeah, he was. You're right.

Speaker 11 Because what he winds up doing is

Speaker 11 hurting the snakes very badly.

Speaker 13 Yes, no snake would survive that.

Speaker 11 Survive? You can't. When he's tying, he's tying tails.

Speaker 11 I'm just like, let's be clear. Those aren't tails.
Snakes don't have tails. They have bodies.
That's their body. That's the snake's body.

Speaker 13 And he's ripping it to shreds.

Speaker 11 Have a tail. So he is putting his full body weight on those snakes and he's talking so sexy to him and then seemingly leaves those snakes hanging

Speaker 11 forgetting an essential part of it he

Speaker 11 full his full body weight

Speaker 11 that's what I'm saying yeah they are these snakes are so dead

Speaker 13 They're so dead. It is.

Speaker 13 But they might be part alive. That's the sad part.

Speaker 13 You know that like when you cut off like this still alive, the earthworm part of it and they're and they know that they're going to die, and they're hung there.

Speaker 11 One of the things that I wish that this movie would have done would have been to have, like, 10% more craziness. Like, let the snakes have voices.
Sure. Like,

Speaker 11 you don't know what I go through. Jeff Farr's always making me bite people.
You know,

Speaker 11 listen, and they're Italian snakes. So maybe they've got an Italian accent.
Right, right. It's like, oh,

Speaker 11 yeah,

Speaker 11 a sinbad. Oh, no.
Don't tie me in a knot. It's a so wooi.
And I like a pizza and a pasta. And it looks like a spaghetti.
Why is it so high-pitched?

Speaker 11 But I really thought you were. You went straight to like so high-pitched.
Hey, man.

Speaker 11 Oh, it's Luigi.

Speaker 11 Mama Mamia. Oh, Sinbad.
Spend a lot of time alone in those hotel rooms. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 11 Where did you guys fall in the pun nichers?

Speaker 11 That the torturer

Speaker 11 has clever wordplay for everyone.

Speaker 13 He's got your hair.

Speaker 11 That's another oh yeah, that's another one that I was like give me 10 give me more of this guy. Let this guy be like, hey guys, remember, I've got a show this Friday night.

Speaker 11 I'm doing improv with some friends, so this is just kind of what I do. Oh,

Speaker 11 the

Speaker 11 piranha love to eat you because you're gonna have, they don't like hair in their teeth.

Speaker 11 Yeah. And I was like, but the man has a full beard, so the joke doesn't really matter.
He screams that out.

Speaker 13 I have a beard before they lower him in.

Speaker 13 But I have a beard. I think a lot of these decisions were being made on the day.
Yes. You know, and people were all, it was like,

Speaker 13 you know, it wasn't like, oh, the actors and the writers are separate. It's like, we're all doing this together, you know?

Speaker 13 And we're only going to be shooting for four hours today because we've got to knock off and have that pasta lunch.

Speaker 11 And by the way, I keep on cutting back to the girl hearing the story. Like, uh-huh.
Uh-huh. Like, and then another one's thrown into the piranha pit.
People get thrown into that piranha pit.

Speaker 11 And they don't ever seem to even fight their way out. It's also dead.
Also, the pit's not that big. No.
The pit's not big enough for

Speaker 11 six men to be put into.

Speaker 11 Also, in this scene, he says, he says to the snakes, like, things haven't been good for you since Eve.

Speaker 11 And I was like, does this story exist?

Speaker 13 In a biblical

Speaker 11 in a post-the-Old Testament time?

Speaker 11 I couldn't figure that out at all.

Speaker 13 Yeah. Well, there's that religion major of coming back for you.

Speaker 11 But is it also that all snakes are connected? Like, does that snake know the story of Eve? Like, do they share one brain? It's not like, oh, well, yes, I was reading the Bible, and you're right.

Speaker 11 We've really gotten a fair shake. Is that all snakes, like, shared trauma? Yeah.
Is that generational trauma?

Speaker 13 Wait, but I thought what I really, I can't believe we're spending this much time on the snake scene, but I really thought that he was going to motivate them to get up in the palace and bite people.

Speaker 13 It was all to tie a snake rope.

Speaker 11 That's all that was. It was all so he could tie, like, that's what I'm saying.
He was grooming them to do evil to them.

Speaker 13 That's fucked up. Yeah.
And that's like the opposite of a save the cat moment.

Speaker 11 That's a kill the snake. Kill the snake moment.
Yeah. Yeah.
Read my book about screenwriting. Kill a snake.

Speaker 11 Yeah, go ahead. How to make 10 movies for $40.

Speaker 13 Yeah, and have them be horny as hell.

Speaker 11 When they go to that island of

Speaker 11 pussy. Incredible.

Speaker 13 I knew something was coming. I was so excited.

Speaker 11 It was. Yes, it was.

Speaker 13 It was something weirder, though, than I imagined.

Speaker 11 When that woman turned into an old lady Game of Thrones style, I was like, I was like, uh-uh-oh.

Speaker 11 No, your first uh-oh is when

Speaker 11 the first woman they see is just doing multiple

Speaker 13 backhandspring, backhandspring, backhand spring through the woods.

Speaker 13 Just for fun. And then the other one attacks that man with her crotch.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

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Speaker 17 You love bad movies. I love bad movies.

Speaker 3 I also love good movies.

Speaker 2 And there are a lot of great movie podcasts out there.

Speaker 17 But the one I want to talk about today is one of my favorites.

Speaker 23 It's called The Confused Breakfast.

Speaker 4 Okay.

Speaker 8 It's like your best friends hanging out in someone's basement give you hilarious takes on bad movies, movies that you don't even have to really re-watch.

Speaker 16 You just know them.

Speaker 17 They're in your body from Howard the Duck to Street Fighter to Anaconda and Cocktail. They also dive into great films like the Big Lebowski, Pulp Fiction, and Back to the Future.

Speaker 17 And they have theories. I mean, they have a theory that Carl Winslow from Family Matters was dreaming up die hard, right? He's in a mental institution, and that was coming from his brain.

Speaker 17 Or they even go into theories about Jenny from Farrest Gump maybe being the worst villain in movie history.

Speaker 16 Yes, this is your favorite movies dissected in ways that you never quite thought about. So if you're looking for another comedic movie podcast, subscribe now to The Confused Breakfast.

Speaker 17 You will not be disappointed.

Speaker 11 Lou Ferigno's girlfriend was very

Speaker 11 beautiful. Beautiful.
And is she the Amazon queen? Yes. Yes.
She is referred to as a mind vampire. That's right.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 11 Now, yes, mind, she is exerting some sort of mind control or something like that. How is it vampiric?

Speaker 11 She's sucking away his will. Is that it? Okay.
Well, because I think that there is a, but, but this is what I didn't understand.

Speaker 11 One woman gets one guy by crotch, the other woman gets the other guy by butt dart. Why are they, why are they so varied? Like, they just want to hold them there, right? Yeah.
So

Speaker 11 why, like, was that a, do they all have special skills? I think so, yeah. Okay, so butt darts are

Speaker 11 honestly, Prince Ali gets the butt dart. Right.

Speaker 13 The scene that I wanted to see was them all.

Speaker 13 Fucking them to death or something like that. Yes.

Speaker 11 Like, honestly.

Speaker 11 That's where.

Speaker 13 And we were even on the boat setting up, ooh, and bring the ointment. Yes.
And I'm like, uh-huh.

Speaker 11 For yourself. A lot of weird lotions.

Speaker 13 I'm like, yeah, there's a lot of things.

Speaker 11 There's like a pause and good idea. Good idea.

Speaker 11 So many ointments there. It's so nice.
The hotel provides ointment.

Speaker 13 So I feel like there were a lot of missed opportunities. You know what I mean? Yes.

Speaker 11 I don't know. Now, can I just say, well, I'll ask this question very openly and honestly.
That woman, when she turns old, that's a white woman in blackface, right? Is it? Yes, it was very disturbing.

Speaker 11 They clearly could not find an older black woman. They're like, this will work.
And it's

Speaker 11 disturbing. It's doubly shocking.
At first, it's an old woman. Whoa.
And then you're like, oh, oh.

Speaker 11 There are shockingly

Speaker 11 offensive images,

Speaker 11 music cues.

Speaker 11 There are stuff, there's stuff in this movie that

Speaker 11 is truly reprehensible. This guy is working off of fork and fortune cookie logic.
Yes. Nope.
Oh, it's nuts.

Speaker 11 But I will say that some of the things that Confucius did say were, I was like, oh, that's interesting. That's smart.
You wrote it down. Yeah, I did.
A lot of plastic to hold down the princess.

Speaker 11 Oh, when she's in that lair, she is in.

Speaker 13 She doesn't have that much technology at that point.

Speaker 11 But yeah, that's the thing is, in Jafar's lair, they have machines, they have tubes, they have leucite, plastic,

Speaker 11 they have clear leucite. She's in clear leucite, like hand guards.
I was like, what's going on? Tubes with like stuff. And then later, multiple people shoot lasers.

Speaker 11 and out of the gems multiple people straight shoot lasers well sometimes out of the gem but sometimes out of their hands yep there's moments in this movie where I mean are there cameras because Lou Ferrigno looks right in the camera like all right Jafar

Speaker 11 I'm coming for you.

Speaker 11 Like he's in the running man or something like that. Jafar is watching them on like a primitive iPad on the TV.
Well, but that's okay. Jafar can be watching them.
No, I agree.

Speaker 11 But you can't be watching Jafar. Like, there's no other

Speaker 11 shiny surface. I agree.
But what's so funny, and I agree, it's so funny because there'll be action and then Lou Farigno Sinbad will win and then he'll be like, yes, Jafar, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 11 But they don't then cut to Jafar looking at the screen, seeing Farigno yelling at him. So it just is strange.

Speaker 13 Connective tissues missing.

Speaker 11 Yes, it just feels weird. And you have to be like, why is he doing that? Oh, wait, maybe he thinks, but what if Jafar's just not looking at the thing right now? Right.

Speaker 11 What if Jafar is like gut diarrhea

Speaker 11 right and he's just right yeah it's not like it's not like a ring doorbell where you go back and go oh who was oh yeah Simbado

Speaker 11 I would love it I would love it if Simbado is like I'm coming for you Jafar get ready and it cuts to just an empty room

Speaker 11 and Sucra's just like whatever

Speaker 11 by the way there are so many things that are just out of the world like Sucra's like did you take your meds this morning Jafar you take your meds

Speaker 11 is so shocking at first you know what i mean and they and they are speaking so moderately so casually like the girl that uh simbad falls in love with she's like yeah anyway my dad's kind of crazy he made a fucking helicopter and we couldn't get it anyway we're here at the souffle your dad salvador dolly

Speaker 11 who speaks like a gibberish language i was like what kind of terrible clown show have i been admitted to to watch this man perform?

Speaker 11 Why does she speak English? Yeah.

Speaker 13 It's only been her and her dad for like, I don't know, 20 years.

Speaker 11 Whose name is Nadir, who I believe is like the lowest level.

Speaker 11 Doesn't that mean the bottom-up? I think it does. By the way, when they do fly away on the little,

Speaker 11 what is it? Like, hot air balloon. Hot air balloon.
The hot air balloon that Sinbad inflates by blowing into it.

Speaker 11 I'm pretty sure his, what what comes out of his lungs is not lighter than oxygen,

Speaker 11 making them able to fly, right?

Speaker 11 I don't know. All I know is that the daughter has a cup of coffee.
She's like, well, I'm just going to enjoy this flight. She's drinking out of a cup.

Speaker 11 Like, she is getting table service in the little hot air balloon. And then at one point, they're like, throw everything overboard that's too heavy.

Speaker 11 And then you seem to have had tons of bags of sand in there. Yeah, that was.

Speaker 11 All they're doing is throwing bags of sand overboard.

Speaker 11 Oh my god.

Speaker 13 The other thing I wondered about Sinbad is really he's doing all of this up until he meets that girl, the redhead, he's doing all of this just so the prince can get his dick wet.

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 13 What's in it for Sinbad?

Speaker 11 Just adventure. Yeah.

Speaker 13 Just adventure. I don't think that's enough to hang a story on.

Speaker 11 Well, really?

Speaker 13 I don't.

Speaker 11 And I think he's on a quest to

Speaker 11 retrieve the things so that peace can be brought back to the city. I guess so.

Speaker 13 But every so often, that prince who looks like an extra from Wham is like,

Speaker 11 whatever. Do bands have extras?

Speaker 11 I don't think, I'll be honest, I gotta take a piss.

Speaker 11 Can you play this song for me? Yeah, yeah, get that extra in here.

Speaker 13 Guys, who else's mom was obsessed with George Michael and Wham?

Speaker 11 My mom was so

Speaker 11 in love with Wham. What's the reverse of putting my hand down?

Speaker 11 I love that you said that thinking everybody would agree.

Speaker 13 He was, no, everybody loved loved him.

Speaker 11 I love it. There was a couple hands up.

Speaker 11 Do people have moms obsessed with.

Speaker 13 You were obsessed. Yeah, we all thought he was straight and just had like great eyes, great eyeliner.

Speaker 11 My mom liked Simply Red. Oh.
Whoa.

Speaker 11 Makes a lot of sense. Yeah, that

Speaker 11 makes a lot of sense. Simply Red.

Speaker 11 How did she feel about In Excess? Oh, well,

Speaker 11 she took away my In Excess C D

Speaker 11 because it has a song called Suicide Blonde on it.

Speaker 11 And she thought that if I listened to it, I was going to commit suicide.

Speaker 11 Because you were so blonde. Yeah.

Speaker 11 She's like, you're already blonde. You're halfway there.

Speaker 11 My mom was like, I need to listen to this so you don't let you commit suicide. Do you see it clearly? Now she was like, I'll take this.

Speaker 11 You're telling me this is a brunette version of Simply Red Man? It's so thick for mommy.

Speaker 11 Oh my gosh.

Speaker 11 While I'm at it, I'll take this sound garden CD.

Speaker 11 I did want Simbad to kiss Simbad.

Speaker 11 Yeah. That was, it was so eerie because last night, again, we did a movie in Denver.

Speaker 11 It starred the Barbarian Brothers. Yes.
Two beefcake, muscle-bound, bodybuilding twins.

Speaker 11 And so that scene was so eerie. I was like, I'm going to have a panic attack on this tour if all I do is see doubled up beefcakes.
Yeah.

Speaker 11 so many pecs so many there was also the beefcake who tries to trap him with the chain oh yeah in the torture chamber

Speaker 11 this is straight Toms of Finland here this is this is in the and I if you don't know what that is just go and check it out of the library

Speaker 13 now that was a sensual moment when you were trying to break out of that screaming yeah they're screaming

Speaker 11 there's a lot of you must have liked it because there's a lot of people being tied up Kira is also also tied up at one point, and he has to rescue her.

Speaker 11 And I believe that's maybe the green monster that's after him. There's also, it seems to me to be quite a bit of random foam on this set.

Speaker 11 Like, like the baddies were having like a foam party or something. Yeah.
And Sinbad showed up and was like, get ready.

Speaker 13 The other thing that's interesting about the Isle of the Dead is how do you know when a dead, already dead person is really dead?

Speaker 11 That's a great question.

Speaker 13 Right, because like at a certain point, that'd be the last thing. Crumble.
But like, he's already dead. Well, also, isn't that the thing about zombies?

Speaker 11 You can't kill them. What you would think is that

Speaker 11 you would defeat.

Speaker 13 You eat their brains? They eat yours. Wait, do you eat?

Speaker 11 How do you kill a zombie?

Speaker 13 You bite them. What do you do to them?

Speaker 11 Wait, you kill them? You think you kill a zombie? This is amazing. Just keep on going.
What do you think? You said

Speaker 11 so quickly. First of all, you said you think you kill a zombie by you biting it, and then you said you eat their brains?

Speaker 11 I really don't know. Honestly, I'd like to kill a zombie.
Give us just a rudimentary.

Speaker 13 Shoot it in the face.

Speaker 11 Your rudimentary understanding of how zombies work. Go.

Speaker 13 They

Speaker 13 somebody bit them, they became a zombie. They want to eat your brains.
They bite you. You become a zombie.
How do you kill that zombie, though?

Speaker 11 Do what?

Speaker 13 You destroy their brain?

Speaker 22 Yeah. So I was right.

Speaker 13 You eat their brains. Well, that was the...

Speaker 11 No, if you happen to...

Speaker 11 Wait, so... What would happen if you-but what happens if you bite your drainage? Why is biting the only methodology at play?

Speaker 11 Why do you think that if you have to destroy their brain, you must ergo bite it? By the way, also.

Speaker 11 What? Why? But what I love about this is that if Jess has seen any zombie movies, which now we know you haven't, that would mean that the big final act would just be a bunch of people with spoons.

Speaker 11 It would be so hard to get at their brain, to get through their skulls.

Speaker 13 Yeah, it would.

Speaker 13 But here's, then how do you do it? You blow their head off?

Speaker 11 Chop their head off.

Speaker 11 They're easy.

Speaker 13 Why are these zombie movies so hard then?

Speaker 11 Blow their head off. I would love.

Speaker 13 And they move so slow.

Speaker 11 Not all the time. Why? And not.
And sometimes they're fast. Why? And Danny Boyle invented the fast zombies.
There's thousands and thousands.

Speaker 11 Oh, I'd love to see. I would

Speaker 11 love to see you try and battle zombies.

Speaker 13 Fine.

Speaker 11 I'm going to write that movie.

Speaker 13 Fine. Do it.

Speaker 11 Just give me a cookbook and I will fight all the zombies you want. I would love it.
A movie in which a zombie apocalypse happens.

Speaker 11 You walk out and you think to yourself, I got to start biting these brains.

Speaker 13 What happens if you bite a zombie?

Speaker 13 We're always worried they're going to bite us, but what happens is that

Speaker 11 blood?

Speaker 11 Why? Why? Because

Speaker 11 when they bite you and infect you, when you bite them, you don't think you're getting the same junk?

Speaker 13 I don't know. What is it that's actually getting you? Their saliva?

Speaker 11 Wow, wow, wow.

Speaker 11 So much.

Speaker 11 Let's go out into the crowd. Please, for the love of God.

Speaker 11 Okay, all right. Hi.
All right. Here we go.
All right. What do you got here? Stand up.
Stand up for me. There you go.
Okay, great. All right.

Speaker 11 Now you're making, okay, you're making your child stand up. Okay.
I own 200 physical copies of the movies you guys have watched.

Speaker 11 I'm so sorry for you. Yeah.
What? I'm so sorry. I'm not you.

Speaker 11 She's not you, sir, the child.

Speaker 11 Yeah, it's cute. Please don't call CPS.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

Speaker 11 So she enjoys the sleepover, everything that's directed at her. You know, she's like, why are they doing this? Twilight is good, but.

Speaker 11 So you're saying she loves the movies, hates the podcast. Yeah.
Yeah. All right, there it is.
Good for her. Well, lovely to meet you.
Nice to meet you both. All right.
All right, who has a question?

Speaker 11 Great. All right, here we go.
Great work. Adorable.
Here we go. All right.
What's your name and what's your question? So my name's Andy.

Speaker 11 So I was looking on Wikipedia about this, and I'm just going to pull it up to make sure I get it ready. You got it.
The original director was replaced by

Speaker 11 Enzo G. Castelleri.
The original director was Luigi Cazi, who directed The Legend of Hercules, the 1983 one. And they said that.
Sorry, did you just say 83?

Speaker 11 Yeah, 83. Thank you.
Yes, this is, I have this, I have some more backup of this. So here we go.
Yeah, govis. What you got? So they mentioned that Enzo shot three hours of unreleasable footage.

Speaker 11 And given what we saw, how bad is that unreleasable footage? Well,

Speaker 11 I think I can clarify this in a second because I can walk us through the thing. All right, let's see.
All right, hi, how are you? What's your name? I'm Scott. Okay.
What's your question?

Speaker 11 So I saw this movie twice.

Speaker 11 And so

Speaker 11 both times when I saw the scene with Sukra and Jafar, I thought this scene would be so much better with Jason and Jessica. Oh,

Speaker 11 bless you.

Speaker 11 Amazing. Jessica would look amazing in that outfit.
Bless you.

Speaker 11 My question is, Paul, you're a handsome guy.

Speaker 11 Which part in this movie would you like to play? Well, it's apparent, the bald cook.

Speaker 11 You've got more range, Paul.

Speaker 13 Don't sell yourself short. You've got more range.

Speaker 11 This would be a good bald part. I'm going to take it.
I'm going to get that

Speaker 11 good bald money.

Speaker 11 Get them bald bucks, baby. Yeah, baby.

Speaker 11 I'm going to come over to this guy over there, too. Who do I have? Jafar's got a question.

Speaker 11 Jafar and the doppelganger's got a question.

Speaker 11 You've got to come to the... That's a gorgeous.
Let's see. All right, here you go.
Hi, how are you?

Speaker 22 I'm doing well.

Speaker 11 How are you, Paul?

Speaker 22 So I actually have a couple things.

Speaker 22 The first one is in my research, I found that in 2015, there was a documentary called Capitan Cozy, which is an Italian-language German-made documentary about the making of Sinbad of the Seven Seas and other cozy productions, which was released by Freaka Rama Productions in 2015.

Speaker 22 I could not find it. I do not speak Italian or German, so I feel like I couldn't do much with it if I did.

Speaker 13 It's nice to know it's there. Yes.

Speaker 11 Did anybody?

Speaker 11 Was anybody successful in finding this or watching this or anything? I'm curious. No? Okay, got it.
Okay.

Speaker 11 You know, sometimes somebody has.

Speaker 22 And then my second thing is: Jason, earlier when you asked if this is set in biblical times, before Kira, Sinbad, and Nadir get into the flying machine, Kira says, Nadir, the famous wizard, he's been a member of the Baghdad fraternity since 82.

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 11 What is that? What is 82?

Speaker 22 What is the Baghdad fraternity?

Speaker 11 What is happening? In 1982? That is all. Thank you.
Probably 1982.

Speaker 11 She also says that he's making his famous couscous, which is finger-licking good.

Speaker 13 Fish couscous.

Speaker 11 Finger-licking. I'm like, whoa, whoa, wait.
And then I think at one point. I don't think we can do finger licking good for something that's not chicken.

Speaker 11 I thought at one point Luke Friggal said, Dyno Mite.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

Speaker 11 He did say, gosh, you're beautiful. I was like, that's so earnest.
I mean, like, come on, Sinbad's so earnest. Do you think he's a virgin?

Speaker 11 Do you think Sinbad's a virgin? Yeah.

Speaker 13 He keeps getting interrupted every time he's about to get some.

Speaker 11 You don't think he fucked a snake?

Speaker 13 Can you?

Speaker 13 Can you fuck a snake?

Speaker 11 I don't know. That's a question.
All right.

Speaker 11 Let's find out. At the library.
All right. What do you got?

Speaker 24 It's her birthday.

Speaker 11 Happy birthday. Happy birthday.
Oh my gosh. Happy birthday.
All right.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 24 We're hoping for some clarity on the seven moons. It says he has seven moons to find all the gems.
Is that seven days or seven months?

Speaker 24 And both is way too long to stay on that plastic table for the princess. That's true.

Speaker 11 Wow. I bought seven days, like four score.

Speaker 11 Like, I I was like, but seven moons would be.

Speaker 11 Well, like, I was like, seven moons, I was like, oh, like, like, in my mind, I was like, oh, seven moons is like, like, just a week.

Speaker 11 But I think

Speaker 11 it might be a month. Yeah, I would also say that, but, you know.

Speaker 13 And they seem like they were gone for quite some time. Well, you really did.

Speaker 11 When you're traveling by boat, I mean, it's very easy. So seven moons.

Speaker 11 She's been on a table for seven months. That's it.
She would be so dead. Yeah.

Speaker 11 See you guys.

Speaker 11 Without any food or water. I do think the movie wants you to think it's seven days.

Speaker 11 So

Speaker 11 at one point. Who the fuck are you?

Speaker 11 No, I'm asking you. Say your name.
Say your name. Yeah, introduce yourself.
Oh, my name is Mark. Beautiful, Mark, everybody.
Yeah, Mark. I didn't mean to scare you.
Balls brothers.

Speaker 11 Yeah, Balls Brothers. I didn't mean to scare you, Mark.
No,

Speaker 11 at one point, gibberish talking dad, they're like loading up on the balloon, and he says something. I only saw this movie once, so maybe you guys caught this.
We only watch it once.

Speaker 13 I barely watch it.

Speaker 11 Whatever you're confused by, you probably forgot that logical expression.

Speaker 11 Basically, he said, he speaks his gibberish, and then she translates for Sinbad, and it's something to the effect of, we're coming for you, Jafar, and we will see to it your name is canceled from the list of accredited magicians.

Speaker 11 And it just seems to me like, isn't that a really...

Speaker 11 Like, is being an accredited magician such a big deal? What does that weaken? What do you stop Jafar from doing what we're doing? What a weak threat. Absolutely.
I wrote that down too.

Speaker 11 What a weak threat.

Speaker 11 To be like, we're going to come and we're going to have your papers revoked wait wait wait wait wait but i have an issue with this which is are magicians getting accredited yeah like i mean is this like is this even something that they calculate like sometimes on free range we're gonna take away your tenure

Speaker 11 you won't get good you won't be fine basically we're taking away your driver's license

Speaker 11 all right what do we got over here uh yeah hi my name is richard hi right

Speaker 11 i have two questions so number one uh do you think that nadir

Speaker 11 was uh

Speaker 11 like supposed to sound like he was speaking a different language, but they were kind of mocking or parodying?

Speaker 11 Like, uh, there's an Italian singer named Adriano Selentano, okay, who has a song that is pure gibberish. You want to play it for us? Is that play? That's the famous gibberish song, isn't it?

Speaker 11 It is made to sound like English, but it sounds nothing like English.

Speaker 11 But it has no English words. Yeah,

Speaker 11 I think it has no actual words. I think it's all pure made-up words.
We don't stand in the shoes, and I'm all

Speaker 11 Except that I feel like what Nadir is doing is like, you know,

Speaker 11 I feel like they are making him look like Salvador Dali, and then they are giving him like

Speaker 11 Italian gibberish nonsense sounding stuff. And the fact that they wouldn't ever translate it, and

Speaker 11 my

Speaker 11 closed captioning referred to it as native dialogue.

Speaker 13 That's problematic, too.

Speaker 11 And I was like, huh, to where?

Speaker 13 Yeah.

Speaker 11 I think they just needed beauty.

Speaker 11 Is this how they speak on the Isle of the Dead? I think they needed comic relief and they just made it crazy. I'm going back to the side of the theater that day.

Speaker 11 There we are, you're wrong. All right, the Rogues Gallery over here.
Let's see if we can pull us out. What's your name? What you got? Hello, guys.
My name's Connor. Okay.

Speaker 11 And so, with all this ADR, all this weird, anachronistic dialogue, what stood out to you? I mean, hey Nong Man got the, gosh, you sure are beautiful. Yeah.
The other one,

Speaker 11 wrestler lady, Glow. Hey, Jafar says, go do your stuff.

Speaker 13 I'm going to tell you, if anyone, I just got those AirPods, you know, Macs or whatever, and you do feel like you're in a surround sound theater.

Speaker 13 And I have to tell you, the movie with those is a whole different experience because you're hearing every, oh, ow, ow!

Speaker 13 And like, in like those death, the dead people that they're fighting, the first ones, the skeletons, they're like this.

Speaker 11 How did the oracle sound with noise-canceling headphones? The oracle sounds like. You know, I don't remember him as much.

Speaker 13 But yeah, it's a real, it's a whole, you, you really, I think the voiceover artists are the heroes of this movie.

Speaker 11 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 13 Truly.

Speaker 11 They really bring in the heat. Yes.

Speaker 11 All right, what do you got?

Speaker 22 I just had a question. So what if when he fell down in the snake pit, what if he actually died? And this was...
Jacob's Landerson Arian.

Speaker 11 Yep. Get out of here.
And then here we go.

Speaker 11 I'm just going to have security escort her out.

Speaker 11 Bring us home, I guess. Let's see.
What do you got? All right. Name's Gavin.

Speaker 11 So

Speaker 11 we established that this movie was originally three hours long and then it was cut down to an hour and a half. God bless.

Speaker 11 To try and make it less confusing, they added the mom and the daughter to fill in the gaps.

Speaker 11 Do we think when we're cutting down movies, as far as the Justice League, if we had established a mom and a daughter telling the story,

Speaker 11 could the JJ Abrams version been better than the Snyder cut? I, you know, look, this is a good Joss Whedon version.

Speaker 13 Wait, do we think that they added it after? Is that what I'm saying?

Speaker 11 I'm going to tell you. I actually know the whole.
I know the whole thing. I'm going to come to you because I have a feeling you're going to have a good one.

Speaker 11 What?

Speaker 11 I'll tell you the whole thing, and I'll make it all make sense. Okay.
All right. What do you got? Okay, two questions about the love stories here.
One,

Speaker 11 Poochie and the bald chef.

Speaker 11 Right? In love. Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.

Speaker 11 Two, Sinbad's love story. Did anybody involved in the production plan on that being part of the story at the beginning? Because that came out of absolutely fucking nowhere.

Speaker 11 And all of a sudden, Sinbad's getting married at the end.

Speaker 11 I will say it did seem to me that they rushed into that

Speaker 11 up scene.

Speaker 13 That was like the love is blind type of scenario. They had just met.

Speaker 11 I was very glad that they found each other. I believe in Sinbad and Kira, but

Speaker 11 to get married that quickly is putting a lot of pressure on them.

Speaker 13 Yeah, especially with, have they discussed that Sinbad's always on the road?

Speaker 11 Right? Yes. Is she going to travel with him?

Speaker 13 Do you know what I mean? What is this?

Speaker 11 The Odyssey? It felt very much like the end of speed. It's like that relationship's not going to work out.

Speaker 11 Oh, wait. We've switched off hands.
What is going on? So my name's Ben.

Speaker 13 Great.

Speaker 11 My question was, at the end in the great battle where they're fighting through the palace, we have this moment where

Speaker 11 Sinbad tells the bald cook and Nadir, you guys deal with the monster. And then they have a little bit of where they're like, yeah, we got to deal with the army.
And then Nadir says it's gibberish.

Speaker 11 And oh, yeah, we got to deal with the soldiers. Oh, no, we got to deal with the monster.
Did I, like, have a dissociative break or something? Or did we never see the monster?

Speaker 13 What is the monster?

Speaker 11 We never, this is what I'm saying. We don't see, we don't see Sucra disappears after she literally says,

Speaker 11 I can't wait to fight them.

Speaker 13 Double justice for Sucra.

Speaker 11 And Jafar is like, Jafar is like, oh, you like a battle. And then we don't ever see it.
Okay. I'm starting to.

Speaker 11 Double justice for Sucra because for some reason, after her first scene, they put her in a weird hat. I loved her hair.
I loved her hair. 1989.

Speaker 13 That was the hair I wanted in New Jersey in the 80s.

Speaker 11 My question was, did her hair change or is that a different actor? What? There were times where I was like, is that the same actor?

Speaker 11 Are they doing, like, what's the, because they were almost obfuscating her period sometimes. I don't know.
I now think the t-shirt should be a 1989 presidential campaign with Sucra and Poochie.

Speaker 11 Oh, that's so great. We want to see that.
Yeah.

Speaker 13 They are. Sucra Poochie 89.

Speaker 11 They're part of like the,

Speaker 11 and it's, what's the town's name? By Land and by Sea.

Speaker 11 By Land and by Sea, something about America. All right.

Speaker 11 Wait, something about America? Yeah, because they're running for president. Oh, oh.
No, I think they should be running for president of Basra. Oh, Basra.
Yeah.

Speaker 13 Make Basra great again. Make Basra.

Speaker 11 Boo. Maba.
Mabas. Maba.
Maba. Maba.
All right.

Speaker 11 I get it. Boo? Oh, Boo?

Speaker 11 By the way, thank you everybody for asking questions. Y'all did a great job.
Y'all did a great job. You did a great job.
I loved it. You guys are great.

Speaker 11 Okay, so screenwriter Luigi Cozy was originally set to direct this film in 3D in 1983. Which would have been awesome when Lou Ferigno is like, I'm coming for you, Javar.

Speaker 11 But what had happened is, before they started production, he was fired. And they replaced him with Enzo G.
Castellari at the last minute, who changed Cozy's script drastically.

Speaker 11 Okay, so then Castellari goes millions of dollars over budget and submits three hours of unusable footage. And they're like, well, we can't release this.
Right?

Speaker 11 So then after a couple years, like three or four years later, they go, Maybe we just bring back that original director and see if he can do something with this.

Speaker 11 So they bring back Cozy, who never shot a frame, but they said, Can you

Speaker 11 get it? Yeah. And he goes, well, maybe.

Speaker 11 Give me $500,000 and I'll shoot some extra scenes, which was the mother and daughter scene and some other connective tissue to make it make sense.

Speaker 11 In 1980s, half a million dollars to shoot that bedroom scene? Yeah. Well, you see.
Like, check that guy's pockets. Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 13 I think he's Italian.

Speaker 11 You know what I mean? Edit, edit. What do you mean? What do you mean about that? What do you mean about Italian?

Speaker 11 Yeah, baby.

Speaker 11 And I also think they added music and lasers. So the other thing that he added in was he actually found old stock footage of a movie called Leader of the Moon Men.

Speaker 11 This is weird. Yes.

Speaker 11 So he actually, sorry, he actually found stock footage from Hercules against the Moonmen from 1964 and used the bad guy of that, the leader of the moonmen, for one of the villains in this movie.

Speaker 11 I believe that was the Oracle who told them to go to different places. So then they used light effects and voiceover to change it enough.
And then then

Speaker 11 this is wild. What a lot of effort to go.
Like, why not just build some like

Speaker 11 puppets? Yeah, no.

Speaker 11 And then finally, Luke Frigno has said this is his favorite film that he's ever made. God bless him.

Speaker 13 God bless him.

Speaker 11 Well, I mean, he probably was like living in Italy for months at a time. I bet this was a blast.
Yeah, no.

Speaker 13 He's so happy.

Speaker 11 To put some context on it,

Speaker 11 the reason why they shelved this movie and then kind of pulled it back out is because Canon Films needed to make money because they had just made Masters of the Universe and Superman 4.

Speaker 11 And those are such big flops. They're like, we got to put something, just throw more shit out there because maybe the dollar will come back.
So that's

Speaker 11 what a backstory. Yeah, it's an intense backstory there.
And

Speaker 11 the original director, the guy who directed the unusable footage, Enzo Castellari,

Speaker 11 did also make the film The Inglorious Bastards, which Quentin Tarantino gave him a small cameo in and a special thanks because Quentin Tarantino had to buy the rights to his film so they could have the same title.

Speaker 11 Wow. Incredible.
Yeah, so that is all the stuff there. That is a very big.
That is great.

Speaker 12 Yeah, that is a lot.

Speaker 13 Well, with all it went through, knowing that, knowing the journey it took, the many seas that it traveled to get to be this film seven of them I'm really proud of it I think they they really

Speaker 13 they strung something together you're proud of it you know it's like when you're on your way to school and like your fucking planet you know your planet project falls apart you're like shit I gotta get this back together and you get something that looks a little bit like the solar system you know why do I feel like that's an episode of the Brady bunch

Speaker 11 That's not your real life. That's an episode of the literal Brady bunch.

Speaker 11 Here's the thing that I found interesting, which was the line that Jafar couldn't quite sell to me, the only line, because I thought it was incredible, was in the name of all that is evil, budge.

Speaker 11 Budge!

Speaker 11 I was like, is he saying budge?

Speaker 11 What a strange word. Here's another

Speaker 11 exclaim. Here's another.
Budge.

Speaker 13 Here's another great line of his. I can trust no one, let alone a woman.

Speaker 11 Here is my favorite line.

Speaker 11 Now I'm getting it. Now I'm on Jafar's side.
My favorite line of Jafar was when he was hiding and going,

Speaker 11 Don't come any closer. No.

Speaker 13 Like,

Speaker 13 a really good Jafar impression.

Speaker 11 Not as good as our person dressed as Jafar. Now,

Speaker 11 let's see.

Speaker 11 There have never been

Speaker 11 a more scary moment in my life than to say this. Oh boy.
Do we have to?

Speaker 11 Skip it.

Speaker 11 Skip it. She gets it.

Speaker 11 She gets it all right. Obviously, we've had opinions about this movie, but there are people out there with a second opinion.
It is now time,

Speaker 11 God help us, for second opinions.

Speaker 11 All right, my name is John.

Speaker 11 I've got another impression to make

Speaker 11 on this movie.

Speaker 11 Ferrignos flexing his pecs all day

Speaker 11 with his pal Poochie.

Speaker 11 The horniest movie that doesn't show any boobs.

Speaker 11 I'm gonna give it five stars, five star, five star, five star review

Speaker 11 on Amazon and five star, five star, five star, five star review.

Speaker 11 Wow, poisey,

Speaker 11 you brought the heat, you redeemed yourself.

Speaker 11 Great job to all the Katie's, all the Gabbies. Everybody did great.
This is what we get. It's a music festival, not an ask-question festival.

Speaker 11 But we will be back for your springtime ask-question festival.

Speaker 11 So much fun. So many different question intents.

Speaker 11 All right, so the average prime rating of this is 4.3 out of 5 stars.

Speaker 11 And when you say prime rating, you don't mean the Logan Paul drink, right?

Speaker 11 I mean, now that I, yeah, because I'm always like, the prime is the best drink of all time. So I'm only like,

Speaker 11 everything is out of five primes. Right, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 11 117 reviews, 64% are five-star, only 4% are one-star. And I will say this: the second opinions tonight will sound like the questions from the audience.

Speaker 11 Franzie W. writes writes in 2006, that's a really, really good movie.

Speaker 11 Buy this DVD and you will not repent it.

Speaker 12 Five stars.

Speaker 11 You won't repent it? You won't repent it. Wow.
Vaxia wrote in 2020, Jafar, I'm coming for you.

Speaker 11 And you know it. Including colon, skilled pillow talk.

Speaker 11 Take notes, featuring colon i always wear my purple pants to town and a

Speaker 11 hot air balloon

Speaker 11 i the title of this i've watched hundreds of films five stars

Speaker 11 weird that one is like i feel like that person wrote that while having a stroke yes

Speaker 13 that's the last thing there's

Speaker 11 this one is lofty uh this one is from our deal louferigno Ferrigno acted his heart out as Sinbad. Truth.

Speaker 11 Representing not one, nor two, but all seven C's in this feel-good movie of the decade. Sinbad makes me love being a man.

Speaker 13 Yes.

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 13 I get it. I get it.

Speaker 11 I don't want to give away too much, but yes, there is some Sinbad on Sinbad action. Woo, mommy!

Speaker 11 And the princess is so hot. Pre-teen boys could so watch this at sleepovers after the parents fall asleep.

Speaker 11 This is, this is a, wow, this is creep city. And then

Speaker 11 continues by saying, and Sinbad is hot too.

Speaker 11 Everybody's happy. Gotta go.
Dot, dot, dot. Outside.

Speaker 11 What?

Speaker 11 What?

Speaker 11 Five stars. Oh my god.
What does outside mean? What? Is he outside? Gotta go. Cool down.
Outside? Is he here now?

Speaker 11 Gotta go, dot, dot, dot, means I turned myself on so much writing this review. Yeah.
I've got to go jerk off. What outside? Outside?

Speaker 11 Well, I mean, that is what a creep would do. It's true.
Now, this is a first and second opinions. There is no review.
This is only the title.

Speaker 11 I've never seen this before.

Speaker 11 My name is Tim Bergman. When you sold me Sinbad, it was in Spanish.
I am not Spanish. I am English, Tim.

Speaker 12 Five stars.

Speaker 12 That's a haiku.

Speaker 11 Wait a second. I'm looking over there and it says, I'm from Boise.

Speaker 11 I am English. Oh, my God.

Speaker 11 Interesting. Maybe

Speaker 11 she's using a computer at the library

Speaker 11 to post that review. Holy cow, this movie, what a treat.
Wow. It does.
You got a good one.

Speaker 11 You got something. You got one for the regular book.

Speaker 11 Would you recommend this movie, Jason? Fuck you. Yeah, man.

Speaker 11 Fuck yeah. Like I said, it's like not even an hour and a half.
It's dumb as hell, but like very watchable. Yeah.

Speaker 11 In ways that are truly confounding.

Speaker 11 I will say that it doesn't answer any of the questions I had, which kept me interested. The movie is playing hard to get.

Speaker 11 Jess?

Speaker 13 Absolutely. You know what I'd like to do is have like a Sunday gathering and just put this on in the background.
You know, there's no threat of zombies in it. There's no threat of anything.

Speaker 13 You have a smile on your side.

Speaker 11 Oh, there's a ton of zombies in it. Yeah, there's definitely the undead.

Speaker 13 But they're not scary. They're fun.

Speaker 11 The slime monster, the rock monster. By the way, this man never uses his sword.
He always takes it out and then immediately throws it away.

Speaker 11 He throws it away or it breaks on the first thing. The other thing that is constantly happening throughout all the battle sequences is they're just dropping in the sounds of clattering swords.
Yeah.

Speaker 11 Even when no swords have occurred. It's clattering, I know.
Like, it'll be like, somebody will punch someone, it'll be a clang, clang.

Speaker 11 And it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not what just happened.

Speaker 11 So go ahead. You want to play it in the background?

Speaker 13 And the other thing would be fun is to do like a costume party where everyone comes dressed as a character.

Speaker 11 Ooh, I like that.

Speaker 13 You know, that would be fun. I also feel like

Speaker 13 if you told me that the costume designer was given $50 and said to go to Party City and just see what they could find, and they built a story around that, I would believe it.

Speaker 11 The best set is the set in like Jafar's little

Speaker 11 studio, yeah.

Speaker 11 Where the princess is captive in the machine. Which makes me think that the director who came back on board might have shot those scenes as well.

Speaker 13 And it was available. Right.
Somebody else had it. It was like Buck Rogers had like a side swing set.

Speaker 13 That was another one. Boy, oh boy.

Speaker 11 By the way,

Speaker 11 I want to get it from both ends by Buck Rogers.

Speaker 11 That's right.

Speaker 11 Yeah, baby.

Speaker 13 Yeah, baby.

Speaker 11 Clearly, that set was not meant to be fully shot around. Because he's walking around the lava pit.
And it's like, well, I guess the lava pit's only a small circle in this room.

Speaker 11 Like, it's like, it's not like he's. I didn't know until the end of the movie they were in an active volcano.
Yeah. Had no idea.
Wait, they were?

Speaker 13 What? Yeah.

Speaker 11 He throws them into molten lava at the end. You don't just have lava around without a volcano, do you?

Speaker 11 Can you? Wait, real talk.

Speaker 13 Wait, can you have a... Were they in a volcano? Did you ever get an establishment shot of that?

Speaker 11 Do you have like lava and magma and no volcano? No. I mean, I guess you go deep, deep, deep underground.
Yes, of course, of course. Okay.
Well, again,

Speaker 11 one pothole.

Speaker 11 What maybe supports this theory

Speaker 11 that these are reshoots is that Sucra maybe never fights Lou Ferigno because they never worked on the movie together. Right.
Like,

Speaker 11 she and Jafar shot all that stuff later. Right, because that's the only scenes that are not ADR'd, too, which makes me think he's somebody else's money.
He's like, half a million dollars.

Speaker 11 I'll record audio on the day.

Speaker 11 And I'll give you a great mother-daughter start to get away with it.

Speaker 13 Yeah, and by then, Sucra's like, has three kids and is living in Boise. By the way.
She's like, giving up acting. She's like, fuck this noise.
Let me go live a quieter life.

Speaker 11 I will say it is kind of progressive to have it be a mother-daughter telling this story. Like in a way, right? I mean,

Speaker 11 no. Sure.

Speaker 13 Everything's wrong.

Speaker 13 If you told me that that woman abducted that child and that they are on the run.

Speaker 11 Boy, wouldn't that be interesting? Like if the blue curtain fell away and they are in like a post-apocalyptic

Speaker 11 station 11. She's like, go to sleep.
Go to sleep. Go to sleep.

Speaker 11 Mommy, does Sinpad save them?

Speaker 11 Will Sinpad save me?

Speaker 13 Yeah.

Speaker 2 We hope.

Speaker 9 We hope he does.

Speaker 11 I loved it. I just thought that once we got to the Island of the Dead, I was like, wow, we're still

Speaker 11 repetitive. It's very repetitive.

Speaker 13 You can't can't fight two separate dead armies.

Speaker 11 You also can't just fight slow. Like,

Speaker 11 they get slower as the movie goes on. That's not fun.
Well, and there's a lot of just like, even the even the hand-to-hand is just like,

Speaker 11 yeah.

Speaker 11 It's not, there's no fight choreography. There's nothing really going on.

Speaker 13 They might not have had the budget for it.

Speaker 11 Certainly not. You know.
But what a great film. Wow.

Speaker 11 Casey, want to promote anything?

Speaker 11 Oh, yeah. I'll shout out

Speaker 11 Invincible season season three on Amazon Prime.

Speaker 11 Just wrapped up.

Speaker 11 I was walking here and two lovely young men were like, are you Rexplode? And I was like, wow. To be recognized as an animated character was

Speaker 11 pretty cool. Also, Taskmaster, UK.

Speaker 11 That's right. That's right.
UK panel show Taskmaster. I'm on season 19.
It's coming out May 1st or May 2nd or something like that.

Speaker 11 So get involved. It's on YouTube.
Why? It just is. So watch it on YouTube.
But you can also get that Taskmaster app, which I get, which I love. And you get Taskmaster kids on there.

Speaker 11 You get everything commercial. Taskmaster Jr. is fantastic.
So good.

Speaker 11 And then one more thing. The final season of Big Mouth will be starting in May.
Here we go. Woo! Yeah.
Season eight.

Speaker 11 We're going to be fucking some pillows.

Speaker 11 Always. Jess, what do you got? Some pillows.

Speaker 11 Pillows.

Speaker 13 If you haven't checked out the deep dive with Ms. June, Diane Raphiel, and I, please come if you want to join the Deep Dive Academy of Significance.
We'd love to have you. Enrollment is pending.

Speaker 13 Accreditation, our university, and the art of small talk, which I wrote with Casey Wilson.

Speaker 13 And yeah, so you can get that on Spotify, iTunes, whatever.

Speaker 11 Every week, every Monday, the dark web is live on YouTube, also completely free. Rob Hubel and I exploring the dark web.

Speaker 11 So much stuff that we find from

Speaker 11 touchless knockdowns from karate experts to a guy vehemently saying you never need to brush your teeth.

Speaker 11 We find the weirdest shit on the internet and we put it up for you. And then I thank everybody for buying my book.
And if you want to get a personalized version of my book, you can go to the website.

Speaker 11 And I appreciate you all. And the libraries have been supporting the book.
Thank you so much. It's been so awesome.
You have been an amazing crowd. Thank you for coming out.

Speaker 11 I know it's a little tricky to get tickets for this thing, so we appreciate you being here. Thank you, Jason jason manzugis just sinclair i'm paul shear good night eat shit boise

Speaker 14 that's our show but please don't go we have a couple of very important announcements first of all one of the best shirts that we've ever made ever happened in boise you can go get that shirt of sucra and poochie under the banner of library in our merch store at our how did this get made website you can get it as a sticker a coffee mug whatever you want i love this design uh it really was a banger.

Speaker 14 I wanted to talk about something a little bit serious right now. You know that we've been doing this show for a very long time.
The movies that we pick on this show have been credited to one person.

Speaker 14 Her name is Avril Halley, and she has been the rock, the hidden feature of How Did This Get Made?

Speaker 14 She has been with us for over a decade, and she is fighting brain cancer right now.

Speaker 14 And we would love it, and she would love it, if you could send some words of support, fan art, anything to lift up her spirits. We have sent videos and songs.

Speaker 14 People have just written her emails. It really makes a giant difference, and she's not asking for anything more than just a couple minutes of your time to send her some good wishes.

Speaker 14 You can send those good wishes to andrew at moviebitches.xyz,

Speaker 23 or you can actually send something in the mail to Averill at P.O. Box641-Agora Hills, California 913-76-0641.

Speaker 14 All this information is on our Discord. It is also on our How Did This Get Made pages.

Speaker 23 Support Averil for all the amazing stuff that she has brought to us.

Speaker 8 We are rooting for her in this battle.

Speaker 14 We just send her so much love. We absolutely are in her corner every step of the way.

Speaker 23 We love you, Avril, and we can't wait to have you back.

Speaker 14 It sounds silly to transition to anything else after that, but I will say we had an amazing time at the Morrison Center in Boise. We will be back.
Our tour manager, Beth Thomas, thank you, Beth.

Speaker 14 Thank you to our EP, Cody Fisher, who stepped in to help edit this show down.

Speaker 23 I also will tell you that Jason Manzukis is on Taskmaster this season.

Speaker 14 You can watch it on YouTube. It is a fantastic season.
He is great on it.

Speaker 21 My book just came out in paperback, Joyful Recollections of Trauma.

Speaker 14 It is a New York Times bestseller. And for those of you who bought the book, let me tell you, my website is now decked out.
I have a gigantic show and tell section. I have old sketches from UCB shows.

Speaker 16 I have me meeting Michael Lennon.

Speaker 23 All elements of my book are now kind of shown in a much bigger way.

Speaker 14 And the book also, the paperback, has 20 extra pages. So for all you UCB nerds, I go into a lot more detail about that.

Speaker 14 I also go into some detail about how my parents get me terrible gifts for Christmas.

Speaker 12 So check out my website, PaulShear.com.

Speaker 14 You can check out all the show and tell stuff there involving my book.

Speaker 21 And if you have not bought the book, what a great chance to do it.

Speaker 16 You can get it right now.

Speaker 14 And if you want it personalized, you can head over to Chevalier's and I will sign it and personalize it to you whatever you want.

Speaker 21 Also, make sure you're watching the dark web every single week.

Speaker 14 And guess what, people?

Speaker 23 We're coming to Vancouver. That's right.

Speaker 14 We're coming to Vancouver in July.

Speaker 21 So keep your ears and eyes open. Vancouver, early July.
Get ready for it. All right.
We'll see you soon, everybody.

Speaker 14 And remember, if you have have any corrections and omissions for Simbad and the Seven Seas, you can send them to our Discord at discord.gg/slash HDTGM or give me a call at 619-P-A-U-L-A-S-K.

Speaker 23 That's right, 619-Paul ask.

Speaker 14 And remember, if you're listening to our show on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, please make sure you're subscribed to our feed and have automatic downloads turned on.

Speaker 8 That's all.

Speaker 21 We just need you to do that. It helps with our ratings, okay?

Speaker 23 We're not asking you to buy anything.

Speaker 21 Just help with our ratings.

Speaker 14 Anyway, last but not least, I got to thank our entire team who this show couldn't be done without.

Speaker 14 I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sawney, Molly Reynolds, our movie picking producer, as I've mentioned before, Averill Halley, our engineer, Casey Holford, and Jess Cisneris, who makes our social media videos.

Speaker 21 That's all I got, people.

Speaker 8 We'll see you next week on Last Looks.

Speaker 3 Bye for now.