“My Fourth Time on Las Cultch” (w/ Julio Torres)

Transcript

Speaker 1 This is an iHeart podcast.

Speaker 1 You ever just stop in the middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break. It literally happened to me yesterday.
I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes, total reset. Right?

Speaker 1 There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice-cold Diet Coke. It just hits.
It's my little me moment, like make time for a Diet Coke break, you know? Exactly.

Speaker 1 Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments. Diet Coke, this is my taste.

Speaker 1 Big news, Aldi is now on Uber Eats, and you get 40% off your first order with code NEWALDI25.

Speaker 1 So whether your fridge is empty and you're too tired to shop, or you just ran out of essential ingredients in the middle of meal prep, don't worry.

Speaker 1 Fill your fridge in just a few taps and get 40% off your first Aldi order on Uber Eats. For orders $30 or over, you can save up to $25.
Ends December 31st. See app for details.

Speaker 1 What if you could boost your Wi-Fi to one of your your devices when you need it most? Because Xfiniti Wi-Fi can. Like when you need to upload 200 photos of your cat in a Santa hat to post online.

Speaker 1 We've all been there. And what if your Wi-Fi could proactively fix issues before they even happen? Xfiniti Wi-Fi does that too.
It's like having a little holiday helper.

Speaker 1 And what if your Wi-Fi had parental instincts built right in so your kids are always protected online? It's Wi-Fi that's not just smart, it's brilliant.

Speaker 1 And during the holidays, that's a gift we all could use. Xfinity, imagine that.
This episode is brought to you by Ross. It's the holiday season, and there's magic in the air.

Speaker 1 Specifically, the magical ability to get more for your holiday dollar at Ross.

Speaker 1 I'm talking toys for the kids, plus gorgeous jewelry sets, cozy sweaters, and amazing gifts for everybody else on your list.

Speaker 1 And if you're hosting for the holidays, and I hope you are, Ross has everything you need to do it upright. Yes, I'm talking about decor, all at 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices.

Speaker 1 So find your nearest Ross and go work your magic this holiday season.

Speaker 1 Look, man.

Speaker 1 Oh, I see. My eye.
Oh, my. Bowen, look over there.
Wow, is that the culture? Yes, goodness. Wow.
Last culture is

Speaker 1 ding-dong. Las culture is calling.

Speaker 1 Take a deep breath. Exhale.
Inhale. Exhale.
It's obviously, you first have to inhale the exhale. That's actually roller culture number eight.
You first have to

Speaker 1 inhale. Inhale to exhale.

Speaker 1 Breathing is really

Speaker 1 fundamental. Fundamental.
Breathing has really saved my ass in recent times. And I feel like I need to really dig into this.
I am like out of breath. I'm like tight in the chest.
Why?

Speaker 1 Oh, I'm so happy you're saying this publicly because now we can all watch it because you can't trust someone to watch their own health. We all need eyes on Bowen Yang's chest and lungs.

Speaker 1 Please, hey, my chest is down here and it is really tight and tense.

Speaker 1 And I just need to like get it loosened up you know i need like this is really hot what you're doing bowen's rubbing his titters and sort of being very orgasmic about this do you actually feel lately that you're breathing and like stuff is different yeah something's going on the body keeps the score and

Speaker 1 no it's not this our guest is making a little cigarette motion it's not that i am in canada And maybe that has something to do with it. Although I'm at the same sea level, I'm at the same.

Speaker 1 No, it's this. Most of my life is still the same.
It's not that.

Speaker 1 You know what I'm going to say right now, which is such a wife thing to say, as I'm going to say this to our guest and to everyone listening. Well, he knows how I feel about the cigarettes.

Speaker 1 The cigarettes are not really figuring in anymore. Can I say something? There was a deal that we made years ago, and I periodically bring this up because it is important.
It is sort of...

Speaker 1 indicative of you not holding up an end of a bargain, which is that when I started therapy, you were going to stop smoking. That was the

Speaker 1 but then guess what? What? COVID happened. No.
And everything changed. Using COVID as an excuse.

Speaker 1 COVID happened and now

Speaker 1 all bets are off. All bets are off.
Was that in the fine print of the verbal agreement that we do? Well, I'll just say for my health, therapy's been amazing.

Speaker 1 And I think not smoking would help you feel less like your chest was locked up and you couldn't breathe. That's just me, though.

Speaker 1 How did this, I just wanted to remark remark on how I've been breathing. I've been more aware of my breathing lately.
And all of a sudden. And all of a sudden it became antagonistic.

Speaker 1 And obviously your problem is due to stress. So why am I piling on? You know what I mean? It's okay.
You know what? This is why it can't just be me watching this.

Speaker 1 It has to be all of us, the community. We have to watch Boen Yang's health because I clearly can't be trusted.
We have to watch each other. This is a mutual aid network at the end of the day.

Speaker 1 We were seeing, speaking of watching, we were saying just before we got on with our guest, we were talking about Disney for a hot sec. Did you see this four? You didn't, but did you see this?

Speaker 1 Are you aware of the four-hour video review of the Star Wars Hotel that this girl posted? Where it's just the most thorough dragging of the Star Wars Hotel from every

Speaker 1 single one. Hated it.
So she basically was like, She's this girl. Her name is Jenny Nicholson.
She's like a YouTube video blogger, a vlogger, I guess.

Speaker 1 And she, her, her thing is niche fandoms, theme parks, and immersive experiences. That's like what she, that's her whole bag.
And the three of those converge at Disney.

Speaker 1 And also, she's like a Star Wars freak. She's like

Speaker 1 really super smart and adorable. And like, she has a big following.

Speaker 1 And she's very, very, very detailed and clear about her experience at the Star Wars Hotel, which she said cost over $6,000 for two people. It was a two-night hotel stay.
It was immersive.

Speaker 1 And you got to watch it on like 1.75 or times two speed because it is so thrilling. Like, get on a Stairmaster, open this up, and you will be walking at a pace you've never walked before.

Speaker 1 Like, it is a thrilling watch. I never thought it would be.
People were sending me this, like, have you seen this yet? And I was like, listen, I'm not this far gone.

Speaker 1 And then cut to me, like, soaking in all of it. It was a blow by blow dragging of this experience, which is now closed, by the way.
This is giving me like, I didn't know my husband TikTok or the,

Speaker 1 right? Like, I didn't know my husband. Well, this girl is nominated for a culture award for this video.
But anyway, it was just so unreal to think about just how crazy it is, like, how far gone it is.

Speaker 1 Like, because she was saying, like, you know, a lot of people might think like it's like the super rich people that are buying tickets to this.

Speaker 1 Like, actually, no, her experience is it was a lot of middle-class people who clearly had splurged on this vacation

Speaker 1 because they thought Disney is, you know, when you say the word Disney, you think of this like experience of like luxury and excellence.

Speaker 1 And like, they're this brand that like you're going to get something out of, but it fools middle-class people because you get there and it's like, all right, you're cooped up in a hotel with no windows.

Speaker 1 It is the hotel rooms are a size of boxes. And it's like an immersive experience in that like there's like characters walking around, but like none of the things are really playable.

Speaker 1 She just, it's a really worthwhile watch.

Speaker 1 I sat there with my mouth open. I was like, this is so crazy.
I can't wait. Can I ask an insane question? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Was I supposed to be talking? This is what, your third, fourth time on the podcast? I know. Wait, how does it work? Like, you introduced me and then I talked.

Speaker 1 So the way it works is, yeah, that's actually how it works. Okay, I'm sorry.
Pretend I didn't do that. Sit tight for like 90 more seconds.
Yeah, no, hold that thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hold that.

Speaker 1 I will talk later. Okay.
Okay, okay. That thing about you talking is going to come in in a major way in a sec.
No, whose voice was that?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Problemista voice.
Problemista voice. Phantasma.

Speaker 1 This is

Speaker 1 our very good friend, our very special guest, a true, true artist. Pioneer.
A pioneer.

Speaker 1 You might know his lovely work most recently in his directorial debut, Problemista. I wanted to give it the title, My First Movie.
And I think a filmmaker has called her first movie My First.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, it's a musician is calling her first album My First Album or something. That doesn't work as well for me.

Speaker 1 My first movie is so much

Speaker 1 so much bigger. You know what I mean? And that's why the title of episode so far for this is My Fourth Episode of Lost Culture.
My fourth episode of Lost Culture.

Speaker 1 But I mean, I mean, don't you, can't you picture like two women at a nail salon and then one of them goes, what are we doing tonight? We're going to go see my first movie.

Speaker 1 It works in many different ways. But when you were really thinking there, why do you think he didn't take your advice? I think it wasn't him.
I think it was the A24, the suits at A24.

Speaker 1 Blame the Suits is what I always say. I think about that with the Disney Wars, Disney World Star Wars hopefully.
Disney Wars. Blame the Disney Wars.

Speaker 1 What we're starting.

Speaker 1 Girl, I girl, come at us. Now, he has a new show coming out on HBO called, is it HBO or Max? I guess it's Max, right?

Speaker 1 No, no, no, not yet. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
You know what? We'll let him tell us where it is. No, no, no.
It is coming out on. He's having to look it up.

Speaker 1 It's coming out on HBO, June 7th at HBO. Prestige.
Come on. It's not

Speaker 1 garbage. No, of course.
Garbage on Macs.

Speaker 1 This is Phantasmus, a really star-studded cast. It'll be, I can't wait to see it.
I have a shirt that says Phantasmus Hadads Trucks, New Jersey. And it is one of my favorite shirts.
I love that shirt.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Phantasmus, for giving me that. Not your first shirt, but your favorite shirt.
No, no, my favorite shirt.

Speaker 1 Now.

Speaker 1 Should we bring him in so we can do some of that famous talking? For sure. All right, here we go.
Everyone, welcome. Julio Torres.

Speaker 1 He's in the studio. Hey, I just got here.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You've arrived. Can I say in a Broadway? You have arrived.
In a Broadway? Oh, oh, oh, in a broad way. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 not in a Broadway. Like, you haven't stomped the board.
I have certainly not arrived in Broadway. But in a broad sense.
In a broader arrived. Yeah.
Wow. Any interest in Broadway?

Speaker 1 No. In performing in Broadway? No, not.
In performing in Broadway? No. That sounds so difficult.
Like, would either of you ever fully be on a play? Yeah. Would you do it? I would do it.
I would do it.

Speaker 1 I would do it. You would do it.
Okay. Wow.
Okay. I think it would really depend on what it was.
On the text. I've seen some one with like solo shows.

Speaker 1 Like Jodi Comer was in this play last year on Broadway called Prima Facey, which is just her doing a continuous long monologue, and like the subject matter was really intense, and she was very physical in it, and it was just her, and she never leaves the stage.

Speaker 1 And I was just like, I don't understand that, but in a way where I could walk in and like say a little, as we call on the best zinger, and then leave,

Speaker 1 I would love that. I'd love to do my zinger.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We are actively seeking zinger parts.

Speaker 1 If there are any singer parts in Lempica,

Speaker 1 Matt Rogers will take it. Wow.

Speaker 1 Now, like, let's say you, let's say we each of us, and Julie, let's just say for the purposes of this thought exercise, you are on a Broadway show and the three of us are on different Broadway shows, or maybe it's the same one, it doesn't matter, but each of us just have to come in twice per act and do our bazinga.

Speaker 1 Do our bazinga and then walk out, right? Yeah. What are we doing in the dressing room? How are we passing the time? Are we like

Speaker 1 being so disciplined? Are we playing video games? Are we reading?

Speaker 1 I mean, you know that it would start with, oh, I'm going to write the thing in the dressing room because I actually have like four hours to kill. I'm going to write.
I'm going to like do this.

Speaker 1 And then you just end up scrolling on your phone. Yeah.
Right.

Speaker 1 Damn. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be on a show.
I would write a show. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But the idea of like being there

Speaker 1 every night,

Speaker 1 night, seeing now like our friends do it in O'Mary. I'm like, whoa, that looks so hard.
It's a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think that I would be pacing and socializing, which would be even more tiring because I know myself. Pacing and socializing with who?

Speaker 1 Like backstage, like

Speaker 1 with anyone with the stage, not with the audience.

Speaker 1 No, certainly not.

Speaker 1 You're going to go outside and be like, hey.

Speaker 1 Hey, what do you think of the play? I'm about to be in it.

Speaker 1 It's going to get really good. It's going to get really good.
It's going to get really good once I come on. No, but that's how I tend to do my downtime.

Speaker 1 But Bowen, I think you would really literally be reading and laying on your back. Yeah, I'd be reading and laying on my back.

Speaker 1 But with our friends who are doing O'Mary, do you see firsthand what impact it's having on their social lives? Because that's the thing that the three of us kind of care about, I think.

Speaker 1 Can I go out? But can I go out?

Speaker 1 Okay, I'll take it, but can I go out? Can I go to $3 bill? Can I go to $3 bill on a Wednesday? Hit up animal for the first time. Can I go to Animal for the seventh time today?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I think Cole does the play and then goes home and recharges is the sense that I get.
Yes. But obviously Cole is carrying the show.

Speaker 1 And James becomes very disciplined, very like school night, like

Speaker 1 go home to care and then like errands in the morning and then like play.

Speaker 1 How does he feel about going into the summer on Broadway, literally on Broadway? Literally on Broadway. But I know that boy loves his summer.

Speaker 1 That boy loves his summer, but he loves

Speaker 1 getting to do his work more. So he did not mourn the lack of free time for a second, I don't think.

Speaker 1 That's good that's perfect yeah I mean 12 weeks only you're gonna have a summer right I mean what what is that is that the yeah but it's like right in the right in the in the peak of summer you know what though it's can I say something it's not a fucking about him okay it's about the people in the audience getting to watch Brower it's about it's not about him it's about it's about the fans it's about the fans that traveled internationally to see oh mary so I don't want to hear it about Jason I mean that's Broadway right people do travel to for this oh that's like especially this show.

Speaker 1 Yeah. This is international appeal.
It's been international figure, Mary Todd. I know they'll learn about American history.
They do. Exactly.
So, why? So, James, what?

Speaker 1 You know what? This is pathetic. I don't know if you knew you would come on here and that we'd be in a fight with James.
Wait, but I just said that he didn't care, though. No, that's not what he said.

Speaker 1 Robot James.

Speaker 1 You just said you're not careful. You are putting words in my mouth.
You are putting words in my mouth. Typical you.
No one ever said this would be typical.

Speaker 1 I'm like, the wall is red. And you were like, whoa, why is it blue?

Speaker 1 Because he's colorblind. I'm colorblind, honey.
Oh, wait. This always comes up.
I feel like I always like,

Speaker 1 I feel like I'm always microaggressing on your colorblindness.

Speaker 1 Wait, do you want to know where I just pictured you and I laughed a lot

Speaker 1 to myself just now? The Star Wars Hotel.

Speaker 1 I think that that would be. I would be so upset.
I would be so upset the entire time.

Speaker 1 Things that are like hyper-curated and hyper-regimented when they want you to have like a very specific paint by numbers or immersive experience. I, it's, I'm so allergic to it.

Speaker 1 I just took, okay, wait. I just took a

Speaker 1 every now and then, okay, every now and then,

Speaker 1 I will take a group fitness class of some sort

Speaker 1 because I like that there's a time where I have to go do it and I know when it ends and I'm not going to spend the whole day thinking

Speaker 1 I'll go work out in an hour and then another and then you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 Is this generally group fitness classes? Are you talking about one specific group fitness class? I'm talking about one specific group fitness class. Okay, okay, okay.
And

Speaker 1 I felt like I was scolded

Speaker 1 for not having enough energy.

Speaker 1 That's probably true. I felt like, I mean, not scolded, but definitely like the teacher said,

Speaker 1 guys, the point of group fitness is to feed off of each other's energy. Hmm.
And then looked at me. Oh,

Speaker 1 and then said something that I thought was so telling. She like accidentally opened a window into her psyche.
She said, You can make noise here. I'm not your mother or your wife.
Oh,

Speaker 1 oh,

Speaker 1 I see.

Speaker 1 Okay. Got it.
But see, I think another reason you go there is to observe. To observe.

Speaker 1 You like observing. I do love observing.
I do love observing. So then you being scolded.
So you're saying every. I wasn't scolded.
That's a big word.

Speaker 1 But it was like this motivation that feels aggressive and it takes you a second because you're like, this motivation that feels aggressive. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're like, I'm definitely going to do what you said. But like, also, it's just like,

Speaker 1 I'm going to do what you said, but you can't command me to feel any sort of way about it. Exactly.
Like, I can turn this thing up, but I'm not going to, my energy might still be bad.

Speaker 1 Yeah, my, yeah, exactly. And, okay, so you know what? I also hate when, oh, this negative energy I'm bringing into this beautiful box.
No, no, no, it's perfect.

Speaker 1 Well, after this, you're going to say something you love. Okay, yeah.
After this, I'm going to say something. Animal.

Speaker 1 Animal to bar animal. Great drinks, hot guys.
That's like music.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 I don't like it when, like, you know, when like a friend makes a meal? First of all, dinners in general. Don't invite me to your dinners.
Don't invite me to your dinners. Okay.

Speaker 1 Let me eat alone in peace. Okay.
Yes. Noted.

Speaker 1 When a friend makes a meal and then there's that very performative, like,

Speaker 1 oh, wow, that was really great. And then everyone echoes, oh, yeah, that was really yummy.
Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, thanks. Thanks.
Yeah, that was great. That was really yummy.
Thanks. Thanks.

Speaker 1 And it's like, it just feels so like performative.

Speaker 1 Cause then it's like, then I chime in and I'm like, yeah, thank you. That was so great.
But it's like, I didn't get to say it at my own time. Right.
Oh,

Speaker 1 it's, it's sort of like, okay, and now is the part

Speaker 1 where we express great. It's like, it's so like systemized.
You feel there's no way for you to be genuine

Speaker 1 about the way in which you've enjoyed the meal and the degree to which you have enjoyed it once other people have sort of started the sending. Like, now is the moment where you do it.

Speaker 1 It's like a standing ovation. Exactly, exactly.
But are you, are you a fan of those? How do you feel about standing ovations?

Speaker 1 I'm not, I'm not a fan. I don't think I've seen you ever stand for a standing ovation.
And that's okay. What's the

Speaker 1 State of the Union address? If you zoom in, I'm there sitting. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Julio.

Speaker 1 No, that's not true. I stand.
I stand. I rise.
You rise. But

Speaker 1 when you were talking about dinner, I thought you were going to bring up how someone makes dinner

Speaker 1 and then sets it down. Everyone eats it.
And everyone goes, oh, that was really good. That was really good.

Speaker 1 And then what I thought you were going to say that annoyed you in the performance was, what's in it? Or how did you make it? I don't want to know. I don't care.
No, it's not.

Speaker 1 It's about the person who made the dinner. And I do this.
I'm guilty of this. I go, oh,

Speaker 1 it's fine. I kind of, I didn't, if I didn't have this ingredient, I didn't really, you know, like, like when you start to apologize.
Oh, but that's you in general, though. That's you in general.

Speaker 1 You don't like compliments. But is that not a performance? Oh, it is a performance.
Oh, it's

Speaker 1 a performance. It's all performance.
Yeah. That's why I'm with you.
Like, I love to go out to dinner with a bunch of people. I think that's great because it's like, it's not, we can all agree.

Speaker 1 Oh, that was so good. Like, it's not about us.
No one's like put on the spot at that moment. Yeah.
Also, the thing with dinner parties is, I don't know how to say this.

Speaker 1 No matter who you are, your food is not as good as our restaurant's food.

Speaker 1 And I always like, your food, no matter who you are, if you're cooking the food at your house, it wasn't as good as a restaurant.

Speaker 1 You're not a restaurant. You're not a restaurant, so why not pretend to be a restaurant? You will never be a restaurant.
Because if you are trying to be a restaurant, you made this once today.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 100%.

Speaker 1 And also, it's like, I could tell you only made it once today. At a restaurant, they're making these things upwards of 9, 10, 11, 12 times.
Yeah. So they have time to get it.

Speaker 1 They have to get it right. And they laugh to get it right.

Speaker 1 Isn't tried and true. Yeah.
Oh, so not for nothing. I go to your house, like the silverware isn't clean.
Oh, stop. And what makes you trust the restaurants?

Speaker 1 I don't trust other people's homes and cooking. And if I have to do that, it's like, know that I'm not being genuine when I'm like enthusiastic about it.

Speaker 1 That's me doing my classic Matt Rogers performance of enthusiasm. Wow.
Because I'm not. Where else do you perform enthusiasm? Everywhere I go.

Speaker 1 Everywhere I go. I'm like, hey.
And what is the emotion you wish you could showcase? Surly.

Speaker 1 Oh, surly. No, I'm just kidding.
I'm actually, I'm happy to be everywhere that I go. And I really do enjoy it.
The way you backpedaled immediately into your performative joy.

Speaker 1 It's okay to be surly sometimes. The bottom line is, I would rather be at a restaurant always.

Speaker 1 Always.

Speaker 1 No, that's the t-shirt. I would rather be at a restaurant always.
Always. Thank you.
We should put that on merch. We should.

Speaker 1 But nothing we've talked about about and covered so far, Julio, disqualifies Disney World for you.

Speaker 1 Nothing. Wait, what do you mean? Like, I think you would still go and enjoy it.
Not that Star Wars Hotel, but I think you would stay in like... Definitely not an overnight experience.
Fine.

Speaker 1 Have you ever done an escape room? No.

Speaker 1 Julio, I think you might like that. An escape room? Yes.
You know who likes with the little games? You know who we did an escape room with recently, our mutual friend, George McGraw. Yeah.

Speaker 1 We had a great time with George doing an escape room, and he loved it. And that was his history.
It was his very first one.

Speaker 1 We went in in Hollywood, and he had a wonderful time at the escape room, and then left, even saying, this is a big part of my whole deal now. Wow.

Speaker 1 Julio, I think I don't want to prescribe an open-mindedness, but I think you can be curious if you want, unless you, if you've ruled it out, I can't stop you. No, I'll try everything once.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Except for most foods. Well, that's different.
The theme would matter, I think. Yes.
There's different themes. Aren't they all like smoky, like saw? Like, not all of them.
You don't do this. Well,

Speaker 1 okay. No, no, no, no, no.
You're thinking of a haunted house. You're thinking of haunted house.
I'm just thinking of haunted house. And you're thinking of scary escape rooms.

Speaker 1 But there's some that are like, I mean, Bo, remember the one we did in Brooklyn that was themed to like

Speaker 1 what were you escaping?

Speaker 1 A Chinese room.

Speaker 1 It was, it was a Chinese curse

Speaker 1 it wasn't fun it was a very fun escape room though yeah but are you good at like puzzles and are you good at like

Speaker 1 um yes you are

Speaker 1 no I'm not good at you saw he famously thinks outside the box he famously thinks very outside the box I'm like what if I made a dress with a box

Speaker 1 That's thinking outside the box. Thinking about not even what goes in the box, what the box is going to wear.
That's thinking outside the box. Wait, have you seen OMG fashion? No, I need to start by.

Speaker 1 Oh, Julia Fox. Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we need to start.
It's really fun. Okay.
Basically, it's like the episodes are like 20 minutes. Perfect.

Speaker 1 And three people come, and then she's like, make me a dress out of this plastic bag. And then they come back.
And then she's like, I like that one. The end.

Speaker 1 And it's so entertaining. I do have to watch that.

Speaker 1 Julia.

Speaker 1 Julia. Yeah.

Speaker 1 very unpretentious.

Speaker 1 It's so unpretentious.

Speaker 1 Well, that's the thing about Julia Fox that I think she gets better than anybody, which is make it inviting and yet also so severe and so like from somewhere, but like make it like unpretentious.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I told something to, I was doing, I was doing press.
for your favorite.

Speaker 1 My favorite thing in the world to do press.

Speaker 1 And you know how you go and then they like put you in the clothes and they take the pictures. It's called the photo shoot.

Speaker 1 and uh, I said something that, like, the stylist or like one of the not the set, but like the, the, someone that was working with the stylist looked at me like,

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Because I said, I don't,

Speaker 1 I was like, they were showing me like clothes that were like really nice clothes, like Lueve or whatever. And I was like, I don't want to be aspirational.
Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 I don't want

Speaker 1 for anyone to see this and think I should spend money on clothes. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then it's like you could feel like the blood vessels break.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Because it's literally, it's literally literally the whole point.

Speaker 1 It's literally the whole point. They're selling something with you.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I think that if I'm that person, like what that could feel like to me is like a superiority thing.
But I think that that's just your truth is like you don't want to be a part of that.

Speaker 1 It's not the way that you dress. It's not what you like represent and stand for.
So it's not, it's not even just like, I'm better than fashion and this person shrivels and turns stand in that moment.

Speaker 1 I love fashion, but I think like ideally like someone would see a picture and be like, lol, oh my God, I should go get a plastic bag and like make a scarf out of it. I needed a Lueve eye patch.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Because I saw Julio Torres wearing a Lueve eye patch and I want a Lueve eye patch now.
Wait, did I? No, I'm just saying that you would hate that. If anyone were to ever say that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't want an eye patch? That's fun, at least.
So like a Lueve eye patch that costs like $10,000, like $5,000. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Which probably it would, right? Something.
Probably. I know what the price point is.

Speaker 1 But this is the thing about Julia, not to keep talking about Julia, but she wears things that like no one would ever think to wear. And she's wearing things that are not aspirational.

Speaker 1 Yeah, here's what it is. I hate like operating and wearing things that have been like pre-approved by committee that everyone has like decided, oh, this is good because,

Speaker 1 you know, the whatever magazines decided that this was good. So you are wearing this like check mark.
Yes.

Speaker 1 So you would never do the MACDALA because that literally is one person, Anna Winter, going down the list being like, Julio can't wear this. He has to wear this.
Which I didn't know. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I didn't know that either. Every single person.

Speaker 1 Imagine having a party where you tell people what that's literally a wedding, right? That's what they do.

Speaker 1 The bridal party. Yeah.
It's like we're all wearing this horrible color.

Speaker 1 But also, like, you can't, like, if you were to show up to like a very traditional wedding in like jeans and a t-shirt, like people would say something. This is why I don't go to weddings either.

Speaker 1 Right. Right.
I think they would, but that's also going away. You send me your wedding invitation.
It's going straight to the trash. Wow.
You heard it here first. You heard it here first.

Speaker 1 But I'll send a text. I'll send a text.
He's not coming to dinner. He's not coming to your wedding.
Yeah, no. And he's not coming to your Met Gala.
Sorry. Sorry.
No, those three things.

Speaker 1 As the air turns crisp and the holidays draw near, comfort becomes the best gift of all. And Quince delivers layers that last.

Speaker 1 Sweaters, outerwear, and everyday essentials that feel luxurious, look timeless, and make holiday dressing and gifting effortless. Quince has it all.

Speaker 1 $50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters made for everyday wear, denim that never goes out of style,

Speaker 1 tops and skirts that add polish, and down and outerwear built to take on the season. Perfect for gifting or upgrading your own wardrobe.
Honestly, Quince Italian wool coats are at the top of my list.

Speaker 1 I mean, the cuts feel designer and the quality rivals high-end brands, but without the high-end markup.

Speaker 1 By working directly with ethical top-tier factories, Quince skips the middlemen and offers prices 50% less than similar brands. I've gotten amazing linen bedding from Quinn's.

Speaker 1 I just bought fun, gorgeous, sumptuous silk pajamas from Quince. My first actual pajama set that I'm sleeping in in my life.
Thank you, Quince. You are the most sumptuous person I know.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 I just love that like someone like you, one of my loved ones, I can go to Quince and be taken care of when it comes to gifts this holiday season.

Speaker 1 So give and get timeless holiday staples that last this season with Quince. Go to quince.com slash cultureistas for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns.
Now available in Canada too.

Speaker 1 That's quince.com slash cultureistas. Free shipping and 365 day returns.
Quince.com slash culture is

Speaker 1 you're one of my loved ones too.

Speaker 1 What if your Wi-Fi wasn't just Wi-Fi, but the magic holding your whole holiday together? Well, with Xfinity Wi-Fi, it kind of is. Picture this.

Speaker 1 Powered by their best, most elite, high-performing tech, this Wi-Fi doesn't just connect devices. It keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful time of the year.

Speaker 1 It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat and the video call with grandma doesn't freeze mid-cookie tutorial.

Speaker 1 It's Wi-Fi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic. Chaos-free.
The best present of all. Let me paint a picture for you.

Speaker 1 A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet.
And your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles. Ah!

Speaker 1 Not this season, not with Xfinity Wi-Fi. With Xfinity, you can boost the Wi-Fi to your device only.

Speaker 1 So when you go to upload 200 photos of that cat in a cute little Santa hat, you won't see that dreaded failed to upload message. Not this season, not with Xfinity Wi-Fi.

Speaker 1 And what if you had a way to make sure family time during the holidays had zero distractions? With Xfinity Wi-Fi, you can pause the kids' Wi-Fi and enjoy those special moments together.

Speaker 1 And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your your Wi-Fi has during this busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online so you know they're safe, even if you're busy making cocoa or taste-testing cookies.

Speaker 1 What? Someone has to make sure there's exactly the same amount of chocolate chips in each cookie.

Speaker 1 And what if your Wi-Fi could proactively fix issues before they even happen? Well, that's exactly what Xfinity Wi-Fi does.

Speaker 1 Like the friend who shows up with extra wrapping paper, bows, and tape before you even realize you're out. Because let's be honest, you never buy enough.
Bottom line, Xfinity Wi-Fi isn't just smart.

Speaker 1 It's brilliant. And during the holidays, holidays, that brilliance, that's a gift.
Xfinity, imagine that. Who decides what you can do? Who gets to decide what you're capable of? Your boss?

Speaker 1 Your friends? Some stranger on the internet? No, no, and absolutely no. You decide.
Only you. Ford shares that belief.
It's like engineered into their vehicles.

Speaker 1 An F-150 is all steel, sweat, and dreams. Right? Mm-hmm.
A Ford Bronco is built for adventure, but you've got to get behind the wheel. Can you? Yeah, you can.
but you have to first. You have to.

Speaker 1 And a Mustang, the Mustang that conquers curves. You are more capable than you know.
Like, for example, I never thought I could parallel park.

Speaker 1 I just thought it wasn't something that was going to happen for me in my life. And not everyone gets to have every experience, you know?

Speaker 1 But then, suddenly, I did a parallel park and I thought, wow, I'm going to apply to Harvard. I didn't get in, but I did parallel park.
Sometimes you just need to push. What is it that they say?

Speaker 1 Whether you think you can or you think you can't. You're right.
Ready, set,

Speaker 1 Ford. Visit Ford.com to learn more.
You ever just stop in the middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break. It literally happened to me yesterday.

Speaker 1 I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes. Total reset.
Right? There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice-cold Diet Coke. It just hits.

Speaker 1 It's my little me moment, like make time for a Diet Coke break, you know? Exactly. Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments.
Diet Coke. This is my taste.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about Animal. What do we love about it? Are we so happy? Are we sponsored by Animal? We're not.
Let's just, it's the big for the community in Brooklyn. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It really has taken the community by storm. Can I say it? We definitely need to figure out a bathroom situation and we can't and won't because there's no way to

Speaker 1 just

Speaker 1 sort of is what it is it's that one bathroom thing and it's got like a trough and there's like at any given time if it's busy like i don't know how you pee in there without getting pee shy and that actually became a big conversation amongst people that i was there with it's like if you wait in line and then you get there and it's like there's so many people behind you waiting and also you're right on top of other people and I don't really deal with pee shyness, but then at Animal, I was like, because it was a topic on my mind and because the space was so small and cramped, like in terms of peeing.

Speaker 1 And by the way, we love the establishment. We've been to the establishment many times.
We're just talking about the bathroom and this phenomenon.

Speaker 1 I left not having peed because I was like, no, I don't know how you do that in there. I don't know how you do that in there.

Speaker 1 You couldn't emotionally access a part of you that would be comfortable enough to pee. Literally, and what did happen was I went outside and peed on the street.
It's okay, everyone.

Speaker 1 Don't be scandalized. People do it all the time.
Like I went outside and peed on the street and it was no problem. It flowed out of me like truth.
Oh, my. interesting.

Speaker 1 Because he didn't feel the need to perform there. Yeah, it wasn't even about feeling the need to perform, it was like feeling the immediacy of performance.
Like, you must pee now.

Speaker 1 Like, because you regret having a lot of time here. I regress.

Speaker 1 Animal. Okay, you heard it first.
And animal is fun, but it will make you regress. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I actually do think that that's true. Like, while I think it's a really fun establishment, I have comments about the bathroom and the fact that everyone I've ever seen there is regressing.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 My God. God.

Speaker 1 Wow. Well, can I ask, is the, when you say single bathroom, is it like one person, single person occupancy in theory, or is it like one place for everyone to go to pee in the trough?

Speaker 1 I'm talking about the bathroom and animal, that trough, like the one where it's like, there's like... Right, I guess Bowen doesn't know what the bathroom and animal is.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I guess you've never even been there before, liar.

Speaker 1 I've been to Animal. I have just never had to use the bathroom there.
Yeah, same actually. You've never had to pee at Animal.
I guess you're always kind of like in and out.

Speaker 1 I guess, but I also like, no, I don't know why. I think it's just a weird coincidence.
I have no qualms with using a public restroom. Yeah, me neither.

Speaker 1 I see what's happening here. I see what's happening here.
What's happening? I have no idea.

Speaker 1 Hey, no one's out to get you. You guys are the two gay faces of that other bar.
No one's going to be able to get it. They hang big portraits of you up.

Speaker 1 And so y'all are trying to poison the minds of the gay community in Brooklyn. You guys are the faces of the gay community in Brooklyn.
You have big portraits up in what's it called? Macri Park?

Speaker 1 No, no, not that one. Rosemont, it's called the Rosemont.
Rosemont. There are huge portraits.
And okay, wait, hold on. But I would like to know, Matt, that this is the second time

Speaker 1 that

Speaker 1 you have said something bad about some, expressed a negative opinion and then

Speaker 1 attributed it to us. Because you were just dragging the bathrooms at Animal.
And Bowen said, I've never used the bathroom at Animal. And then you said, oh, you're dragging Animal.
Yeah, he was.

Speaker 1 This is my whole thing. By the way, you haven't even let me talk about the bathrooms at Rosemont, which are also not good enough.
Right, right.

Speaker 1 But there's no gay bar where the bathrooms are good enough. They're not good enough at Metro.
They're not good enough anywhere. Like, it's like, it's just the charm.
It's part of the charm.

Speaker 1 Part of a Brooklyn gay bar charm is like, you're going to have a bad time going to the bathroom.

Speaker 1 It's the doing drugs in the bathroom. It's that makes it a problem.
It's like, grow up.

Speaker 1 Grow up.

Speaker 1 Like, do them outside.

Speaker 1 Well, there's they're basically like at the door to animal. I'm just giving everyone out there that maybe isn't like a Brooklyn gay person an experience there.

Speaker 1 You'd walk up to the door, and it's the only door I've walked up to where the person at the front runs through a spiel before you're allowed in. It's like a running.

Speaker 1 That's definitely not the only place in that's a very New York thing. Is it a very New York thing? Okay, well, honestly, Julio, it is very experientially, it really feels like a Disney pre-show.

Speaker 1 It's giving

Speaker 1 you like, you belong in Orlando, Florida. That's where you belong.

Speaker 1 Wait, but I don't think I'd heard, I don't think I'd heard the speech at animal. What is it? It's basically like

Speaker 1 no drugs in the bathroom. And then there's like a joke about where you could do it.
And then, you know, there's like, yeah, yeah. And the biggest role is have fun.
Yeah. It's giving flight attendants.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Miss Door has a routine.
Miss Door has a routine. And that's rural culture number 77.
Miss Door has a doctor. Miss Door has a routine.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Miss Door has a routine. Anyone doing security at at any bar from now on is they're not security, they are Miss Door, Miss Door, Border Patrol.
Is Miss Door?

Speaker 1 They're they're the customs officials are Miss Door,

Speaker 1 Miss Door. Mrs.
Door. What are you? What are you doing in the United States? All right, Miss Door, little Nosy, Miss Door.

Speaker 1 It's giving Nosy, Miss Door.

Speaker 1 Are you carrying more than $10,000 in cash? Okay, Miss Door.

Speaker 1 Are you Miss Door? Yeah. Oh, look at someone looking for a sugar daddy, Miss Door.

Speaker 1 What do you think they would do?

Speaker 1 Be so confused and probably take us all away. I mean, like, I don't think, I don't think they have a sense of humor down there at border.
I mean, I think they have to suppress it.

Speaker 1 They do. If they think it's funny, they won't show.
Yeah, they won't show. They definitely won't show.
They definitely won't show.

Speaker 1 But the border people in Canada, I got here, they are not Canadian in behavior and manner. And they are.
Oh, they're not being kind and welcoming. No, they're really drunk on power.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say it.

Speaker 1 wow do you have a canadian passport no no it's funny i i showed up like i had my work permit like form and then i got there and they were like you don't need to be here i was like why they were like you're in the system like you're you're a citizen i was like oh yeah and then i went

Speaker 1 you forgot you were a canadian citizen i forgot that i thought work permit just meant like you needed to have that no matter where you went like it just didn't matter what your nationality was.

Speaker 1 I'm so stupid. I take all these things for granted, but didn't need it.
You're not stupid, Boan. I don't think you're stupid at all.

Speaker 1 I think you had a moment. Let me tell you something.
I think you had a moment. You just had a lapse.
You have a lot on your plate and you can't keep track of all these things. I know.

Speaker 1 You have to give yourself some grace. Thank you.

Speaker 1 I do think, Bo and Yang, I'm going to say this to you publicly. I do think it is hire an assistant time.
This is so interesting because

Speaker 1 assistants are on the brain. Yeah, they should be.
I think it's time for you to hire an assistant. We have a cast assistant.

Speaker 1 So on Canadian sets, they have a cast assistant okay and we have one person his name is james he's wonderful different than a pa different than a pa and so he just is for whatever principles whatever i i hate the hierarchy thing but it's like principals get a cast assistant and then he was just like what do you like to drink and i was like he's like i'll stock your fridge i was like oh um diet coke and celsius and then i showed up the next day and it was full of and i was like diet coke and celsius this is dangerous careful with the celsius oh i know that's sort of what an assistant does though and they can also do things that aren't just like elective and like, this will be fun to have Diet Coke.

Speaker 1 Like, that'll be amazing. Even though it is like something you asked for, you should have the Diet Coke.
It's like. But that feeling was amazing.
I know, but think about this.

Speaker 1 Like, now you could have a person that like responds to the emails you don't want to respond to, pays certain bills, like, you know, like gets on top of things.

Speaker 1 I just feel like you're a prime candidate for one. We'll see.
We'll see. Julie, what were the names of the fictional assistants, you know, way back in the day? Hans and Celeste.
Hans and Celeste.

Speaker 1 Now, have those names changed in sort of what they mean to you now that we all know and are very close to a Celeste in our lives? I'm speaking, of course, about Celeste IM.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so interesting because

Speaker 1 the name is a little bit more real now, right? Like, it's not this.

Speaker 1 I never thought about that. You create this name for this idea of this person, and then all of a sudden, there comes the real person.
Well, no, because Celeste is so

Speaker 1 different

Speaker 1 than

Speaker 1 the idea of Celeste,

Speaker 1 which

Speaker 1 that's what I called Greta Teitelman's character. Yes.
Yeah. In the movie.

Speaker 1 The idea of Celeste. No, that's a title.
Because the idea of Celeste is Greta Teitelman, and Celeste Yim is not the idea of Celeste. No, no.
They are their own person, of course.

Speaker 1 I am 100% riding hard for this train of thought.

Speaker 1 Because Greta Teitelman is Celeste. Yes.
Yes. She is Celeste in concept.
Yeah. But I do think about this quite often.
I do draw this.

Speaker 1 I connect these dots in my mind whether i'm with celeste i am or not i go

Speaker 1 my only other encounter with the name celeste has been with a couple other celestes in real life but mostly i think about celeste like julio's fictional assistant intern i'm sorry intern and now i feel like what i've noticed is unpaid unpaid intern what i've noticed is julio has now moved into the realm of made-up names fictional names names that are oh my god yeah i love you know what i mean it's my favorite thing to do yeah Yeah, is there any sort of like switch in that?

Speaker 1 Like, do you feel like that's there's truth to that statement of like you feel like in order to like further filter out from reality, you go, let's make up these fictional names, Bebo and put it on Pimpina, and like all these like these names.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, creatures are funnier when they have fake names, I think. Of course, I think that's the general rule, of course, because then they become more like unplaceable, I guess.

Speaker 1 And they also get an inner life immediately, immediately, yeah. Like the learning curve for people to know how to spell Pierlin Pimpina is always funny.
Yeah. I think I can spell it.

Speaker 1 Go ahead.

Speaker 1 P

Speaker 1 I R

Speaker 1 U

Speaker 1 L I

Speaker 1 N

Speaker 1 P

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 You're so close. N.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 P I N A?

Speaker 1 Yes. Gorilla Pimpina.
Peterini Pipipina. You did amazing.
Piterin Pipina. Thank you.
Yeah. That was really good.
Wow. That was very good.
Thank you. Now, names.
Matt is a big name person.

Speaker 1 I was just thinking to myself, like, what's your favorite name?

Speaker 1 Beginnings Chang. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 Well, Beginnings Chang is like such a big

Speaker 1 name in like pop culture history for me. Like Beginnings Chang, like that's...
Wait, I'm so sorry. Can you fill me in on who Beginnings is? Go ahead, Bowen.
Who's Beginnings Chang?

Speaker 1 Deep House Dish, which is the sketch that James Anderson wrote on us and l

Speaker 1 in the early days the king of of the king of fake names jenjin binks

Speaker 1 and i'm jenjin binks and i'm jenjin binks but when maya rudolph hosted us and l she beginnings chang is like stuck in her brain like beginnings chang is

Speaker 1 stretches generations you know what i mean absolutely I was sitting here thinking to myself, like, just like, do you feel like the concept of your name? And I was like, I don't.

Speaker 1 Our names are Matt Rogers, Bowen Yang, and Julio Torres.

Speaker 1 Do you feel like the concept of your name? No, I don't. I don't.
But would you name yourself? Probably like a little sound of some kind.

Speaker 1 Well, actually, I met someone who had a kid named Inti. Inti? Inti.
Inti.

Speaker 1 That's so

Speaker 1 good. Which I was like, oh, I wish I were an Inti.

Speaker 1 I always want my name to be like Lida, like L-E-E-D-A. Lida.
Lida. Like, isn't that so beautiful? Like, that is so beautiful.
That's so elegant. You're making your elegant face.
I love Natralia.

Speaker 1 I love, like, Leilani. I love Elantra.
You like your L's. Elantra.
I love that beautiful sort of like ethereal feminine name, like Lorelei.

Speaker 1 My favorite friend, and now I'm to letting everyone know they were not my favorite friend in high school, was named Lorianne. Lorianne.
Lorianne. L-O-R-I-E-N-N-E.
Lorianne. Lorian.

Speaker 1 Wasn't that good? Wow. I always was like, how do you get a name like that? Because no one I grew up with had one.
Everyone was Amanda. Everyone was Matt.
Everyone was

Speaker 1 everyone was right. Especially Rilla Culture number 19.

Speaker 1 Everyone was Amanda. But can I say, Matt, I think you out of the three of us embody your name the most.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Matt Rogers, it feels, I think it feels really good on the tongue to say.

Speaker 1 And so to speak. I disagree.
I think that Matt Rogers sounds more serious

Speaker 1 than Matt the person. And I would say that Bowen is beautiful for you.
Yeah. I like Bowen.
I don't know. Yang, I'm like, I forget that that's my last name.

Speaker 1 But it counter, it, uh, it grounds the Bowen. Oh, interesting.
I want my humanizes the Bowen. Uh-huh.
I agree with you that Bowen is like, it's got this like, there's like a beauty and a whimsy to it.

Speaker 1 But also, didn't you say it's quite a common Chinese name? Oh, really? Yang is very common. Bowen is, it's pretty, all Chinese names are very unique.
Like, it's like the characters are infinite. But

Speaker 1 I like Bowen. The Yang is something that I like forget about, which sounds weird.

Speaker 1 A Y is so pretty, though. I like a Y

Speaker 1 very pretty.

Speaker 1 I like a Y. Now, letters that you guys want in your, so Matt wants an L.
Julio, I think you want, like, you want a Q.

Speaker 1 I definitely want, I would love a Q. I would also love an I, a lowercase I.

Speaker 1 Uh-huh. You have one.

Speaker 1 I want more, and for them to have more of a spotlight in the name. Because right now, the I in my name has a supporting role.

Speaker 1 The I in my name is very like, would that be all, ma'am? You know, in the scene. Oh,

Speaker 1 but I need the I to be a protagonist. Oh my God.
Inti. Inti.
I'm going to ask you. I'm going to ask you a question.
Yeah. Can you name me?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I can. Hold on.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Kevin Banks. Kevin Banks?

Speaker 1 Wait, is that someone already? But how is that so much different than Matt Rogers? You don't. Okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 1 But Kevin Banks, it just seems like if you wanted to give me like a whimsical, silly name that you're talking about. Yeah, that's what I was going to say.
Kevin Banks. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm looking at myself being like, am I Lance?

Speaker 1 Well, you could be Lance. I'm not a carrier, but that's taken.

Speaker 1 It is taken. There's another big gay Lance.

Speaker 1 You can't do that.

Speaker 1 Too many. I have a first name for you.
I have a first name for you. Okay.

Speaker 1 Rulie.

Speaker 1 Rulie?

Speaker 1 Rulie. Rulie.
Rulie. Rulie.
You think I should be named Ruli? No. Rulie.

Speaker 1 Don't you want it? You wanted an L and you wanted something interesting. You know what my name should be? And sorry to him.
Leland. I'm taking it.

Speaker 1 Leland. Sorry to which Leland.
There's a Leland songwriter and singer. Leland.
And that's a stage name, but it's a beautiful stage name.

Speaker 1 I don't think it's Leland. I think Leland is too

Speaker 1 kooky for you. Okay, so sorry.
So, Matt, do you want a quote-unquote like established name? Here's my name.

Speaker 1 Philip Dunkrit. No,

Speaker 1 no.

Speaker 1 What is Dunkritt? No, you want to play Philip Dunk Dunkrit. You don't want to play.
You're right.

Speaker 1 No one take the name Philip Dunkritt. Like, that's something that I'm using.
Philip Dunkritt. What is Dunkritt from? I don't know.
I made it up. I made up a word.
We're talking about how that's fun.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Yes.
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. I have one.
I have one. Go.
Dustin Dallas. I'll be at Dustin Dallas, 100%.
That is

Speaker 1 a little gay porn, though. Yeah, no, I think it's perfect for you.
Dustin Dallas. Or like Duncan Dallas.
Dunkin' Dallas. Dustin Dallas.

Speaker 1 That could be Dustin Dallas. Dustin Dallas? One of my favorite porn stars' name is Dustin.
Dustin what? Does he have a last name? Hazel. Dustin Hazel.
That's a great name.

Speaker 1 I'm not familiar with Hazel's work. He's wonderful.
Yeah. Okay.
Check it out. I feel like both of you, I'm thinking of your output and your art and your work.

Speaker 1 And both of you, I feel like in your future, if not already, have like a gay porn type of story to tell through your writing, your directing, your

Speaker 1 like something we make will generate a porn spoof that we are not going to be able to do that. Like what he's saying is he wants us to do only fans together.
That's what he's saying.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he wants us to start up a channel. He wants to watch us.
I can't open a small business. I like, I really, I do not have a time.
Big hole.

Speaker 1 It's so much admin work. Oh, I can't.
I don't know how our friends who, our friends who have OnlyFans, it's like the amount of time it takes to like interact with people. And it's just, no, it's,

Speaker 1 it is like a crazy hard job. Yeah.
I recently saw someone have like sort of a little bit of a breakdown. Like it's this guy on OnlyFans.
And I guess he got a message from someone.

Speaker 1 And he put the breakdown on OnlyFans. It was like, no, he didn't have a breakdown on OnlyFans.

Speaker 1 Although I have watched some people that I follow on OnlyFans like post long things about how like, yeah, they haven't been feeling well.

Speaker 1 I have seen some people like really open up about what the toll this takes on their mental health and stuff. And I'm like, God, then like, please take this to another platform or to another service.

Speaker 1 Like, because, not because I don't want to hear it, but because I'm like, this is not, you're not going to get what you need from your OnlyFans followers.

Speaker 1 But maybe the transcription. On Twitter, the community would rap.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's where they're kind.

Speaker 1 And I guess what I mean by ticket to another platform is like, take this feeling somewhere else to feel better about it, like therapy or like friends or something like that.

Speaker 1 But I did recently see someone that I follow on OnlyFans, who I also follow on Instagram, sort of say that people in his DMs get very familiar and sexual and treat him sort of like garbage, like not a person.

Speaker 1 And he was saying, It's like this particular creator was like, I don't want to have sex with you and your boyfriend.

Speaker 1 Like, I don't want if you're in an open relationship, like, I'm not someone who wants to participate in that. That's my preference.

Speaker 1 And, like, because of my job, it seems like everyone thinks they can talk to me crazy and like throw anything by me.

Speaker 1 And if I react in a certain way, it's like, oh, suddenly they're like, oh, fuck you. You're not as fun as I thought you were.
Like, no, like, you subscribe to me.

Speaker 1 Which is so childish to think that, like, someone's job

Speaker 1 is like how you should like interact with them when they're not. It's very like, no, honey, there's a human under Mickey.
Right, exactly.

Speaker 1 Like you say, you can't walk up and grab Mickey's butt just because Mickey, the character, is such a slut. You know what I mean? Like,

Speaker 1 there's a human in there. Even though Mickey is a big whore.
But also, I feel like...

Speaker 1 I feel like the two of you,

Speaker 1 people want friendship from the two of you. Yes.
And that's not a bad thing to like, that is not a toxic thing to like that.

Speaker 1 That is so different from people on OnlyFans being like treated and talked and spoken to like chattel because it's completely sexual and whatever. Like, I can handle that, yeah.

Speaker 1 The parasocial thing with us is like, maybe sometimes people will talk to us like as if they know us.

Speaker 1 And what's funny is when they start doing it, and then like, like, one time, like, someone came over to Bowen and was like, Bitch, and like, yelled, bitch.

Speaker 1 And like, it was like you could feel them feel in the moment like it was Robert De Niro. It was De Niro, it was Bob.
It was De Niro with the Saga Warren. He was like, bitch, bitch.

Speaker 1 You little F-slur. Yeah,

Speaker 1 sometimes it's like you could literally see in a moment people realize, like, oh, I just talked to him. Like, I know him.
I don't know him. But I think it's just, you know, tales all this time.

Speaker 1 Totally, totally fine. I do feel like this is, this sounds like such a naive discovery, but I feel like people who have followings will engender and reflect the things about them onto those

Speaker 1 people, like on a larger scale. Does that make sense? Like, perfect example is Sarah Sherman.
Like, her fans are people who send her fan art and are so creative and so kooky and weird and silly.

Speaker 1 And, like, that's because that's who she is. And, like,

Speaker 1 I feel like, Julio, you invite people who are extremely like thoughtful and like artistic. But then, like, people, what are you saying?

Speaker 1 That, like, people, like, walk up to Sarah and be like, do you want to see my sit? And she does talk about that.

Speaker 1 She's like, people do also like, and like, we all have this thing thing of like, anyone who has like an online or like a persona in one public facing way and then a private inner life, which is almost everybody, like has this weird dissonant thing where it's like, oh, but you think that like you're able to bring that to me and I'm supposed to like honor and appraise that in a way that you expect.

Speaker 1 And it's not exactly what it is. And it's not exactly what it is.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm trying to find the right words. You found them.
I did. But like, people seem very measured with you.
Oh, who you're talking to? Me?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think I've had any interactions that

Speaker 1 have made me uncomfortable. Yeah, no.
There was one at my Christmas show where, and I, and I adore this person.

Speaker 1 And if this person hears this and knows it's them or thinks it's them, like, just take it away from you. I'm just saying in an amorphous way.

Speaker 1 There was someone who came up to me once at one of my shows and said, I have to tell you, I hated you for a really long time. And I listened to the podcast and I hated you.
I couldn't stand you.

Speaker 1 And then I realized I was you. And that's why I'm wow.
That's very powerful.

Speaker 1 And they go like, because when you are like too much or you're annoying or you say the thing that you shouldn't say, like, I just, I said, I hate him. And then I realized, no, I hated myself.

Speaker 1 All the things about you that I don't like were the things I didn't like about me. And then they were like, and now I love you.
Like, I appreciate you. I respect you.

Speaker 1 You inspire me because i have learned to love myself and i was just like sort of taking it in and i was like oh like i get it but like it's not it's it's a lot when you're on the receiving end of it because it's just like oh okay like you're still hearing the words i hated you you know of course and the reasons why yeah and the reasons why

Speaker 1 and i'm literally standing there like with the vinyl she had bought in my hands like signing it like okay oh my god people waiting behind her i was like okay what did did you write?

Speaker 1 Thanks for not hating me anymore. I know I can be too much.
Winky face. I mean, knowing me, I probably wrote love you, mama, XO, XO, Matt Rogers.
You know what I mean? Like,

Speaker 1 Matt Rogers clocking in with a love you, mama. Me on autopilot writing my mama.
Love you, mama. Love you, mama.
It's late queen. Love you, mama.
Love you, mama. Love you, mama.

Speaker 1 Love you, mama. XO, XO.
Don't smoke. Wow.

Speaker 1 But that's beautiful. Bowen.
Yeah. What? Do you have anything to say to that person that called you a bitch, Robert Zaniro? Do you want to say something to Robert? Robert was,

Speaker 1 it was in the middle of Tribeca Film Festival. It was his festival.
It is his festival to revitalize downtown New York. To revitalize downtown New York after 9-11.
You know,

Speaker 1 I was a volunteer for the Tribeca Film Festival twice when I was in college. That's great.
It must have been good enough for you to go back.

Speaker 1 I just thought, like, oh, if I'm the best volunteer, they're going to give me a job and I'm going to get a visa. So I was just like doing, I would do anything that people would allow me to do.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But did you learn a lot about film? No.
I wasn't going to learn it.

Speaker 1 No, I didn't. I was like an usher in a little Tribeca Film Festival t-shirt.
That's the thing about going to those festivals, it is so hard to see anything.

Speaker 1 I don't even know how to wrap my head around like getting

Speaker 1 ugly. Yeah.
Forget it. I've been to Sundance twice.
I've not seen a movie at Sundance.

Speaker 1 I'm not kidding. I just.

Speaker 1 You went last. Didn't you? You told me about things you saw last time you went.
Bib, no, I've never seen a movie at Sundance. I had to get away from it.

Speaker 1 And it was like, oh, the ticket is in a seat. Like, you know, you have to get here early.
It's like any of the good stuff. Like, I couldn't even finagle my way in with like connections.

Speaker 1 I was like, you're like, can I please watch a movie?

Speaker 1 I definitely wanted to watch a movie. Watch a movie.
I got tickets to one movie, which was the Brooks Shields documentary, and I was excited about seeing it.

Speaker 1 But then you're at Sundance and it's like, oh, so much. I'm like, you're so tired.
Everyone's so hungover the entire time. And we didn't end up going.
And there's like the Uggs Lounge or whatever.

Speaker 1 And I mean, when there's the Uggs Lounge, do you really have to go see a movie? You know what I mean? There's so much to do in the Uggs Lounge. Yeah.
They have Coco.

Speaker 1 They make that main street of Park City so fun. Like, you don't ever have to leave.
I'm not a festival person. I must say, I have a hard time with festivals.

Speaker 1 I think that Edinburgh really took it out of me. Yeah.
It's a tough one. Well, that's totally different from like a South Buy, which you did for Problemista.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but there you just show up, you're not really doing anything. The movie's made,

Speaker 1 uh-huh. And then, but you're still promoting it, you're still like putting on a face to like talk about like the thing you made.
And yeah, yeah, yeah,

Speaker 1 you answered questions, and yeah, I'm always like, be likable, be likable, be likable. Oh my god, be likable.

Speaker 1 You don't have to try, you are.

Speaker 1 Powered by their best, most elite, high-performing tech, this Wi-Fi doesn't just connect devices, it keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful time of the year.

Speaker 1 It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat and the video call with grandma doesn't phrase mid-cookie tutorial.

Speaker 1 It's Wi-Fi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic, Chaos-free. The best present of all.
Let me paint a picture for you.

Speaker 1 A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet.
And your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles. Ah!

Speaker 1 And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your Wi-Fi has during this busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online so you know they're safe, even if you're busy making cocoa or taste testing cookies.

Speaker 1 Bottom line, Xfinity Wi-Fi isn't just smart, it's brilliant. And during the holidays, that brilliance, that's a gift.
Xfinity, imagine that. Who decides what you can do?

Speaker 1 Who gets to decide what you're capable of? Your boss? Your friends? Some stranger on the internet? No, no, and absolutely no. You decide.

Speaker 1 It's like engineered into their vehicles. And F-150 is all steel, sweat, and dreams.
Right? Mm-hmm. A Ford Bronco is built for adventure, but you've got to get behind the wheel.
Can you?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you can, but you have to first. You have to.
And a Mustang, the Mustang that conquers curves. You are more capable than you know.

Speaker 1 Whether you think you can or you think you can't? You're right. Ready, set, Ford.
Visit ford.com to learn more. You ever just stop in the middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break.

Speaker 1 It literally happened to me yesterday. I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes.
total reset. Right? There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice-cold Diet Coke.

Speaker 1 It just hits. It's my little me moment, like make time for a Diet Coke break, you know? Exactly.
Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments. Diet Coke Coke.
This is my taste.

Speaker 1 Two questions. What are you doing right now? And why aren't you on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise? Well, obviously you're listening to us.
Smart use of your time. True.

Speaker 1 But you could also be on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise at the same time. That's just brilliant time time management.
Very true. This gives me an idea.
Let's do a quick cruise quiz. Ready?

Speaker 1 First, cruise dining. Do you prefer a buffet or a curated dining experience with access to 20 distinct restaurants? Curated dining.
Next. Okay, good choice.
That's what Virgin Voyages offers.

Speaker 1 Second question. Would you rather have an overstuffed itinerary or the freedom to explore stunning?

Speaker 1 Oh, I want the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean destinations. Again, I think I see where this quiz is going.
Virgin Voyages is amazing. Yeah, absolutely.
The cruises are kid-free.

Speaker 1 From sunrise yoga to late-night cocktails, every moment is made for grown-up fun. Nothing against kids.
Kids are awesome, but sometimes it's nice to be kid-free.

Speaker 1 And there's so much included value, over $1,000. Right, over $1,000 of awesomeness all included.
Wi-Fi, soda, top-tier entertainment, over 20 restaurants, and even group fitness classes.

Speaker 1 No hidden fees, no surprise charges. Virgin Voyages gives you the kind of luxury you actually deserve.
And you know what? I deserve luxury. You do, and me too.

Speaker 1 yes there's always something happening on board from wellness focused sailings to epic holiday voyages live music djs themed parties and more boredom doesn't board the ship and there are so many amazing stops you leave from miami and sail to places like grand cayman jamaica puerto rico and the dominican republic virgin even has their own private beach club in biveny and they're adding stops in 2025 and 2026 yeah like aruba saint lucia and curacao that's not all go go go right you can totally go into relaxation mode too your cabin is a full-on sanctuary private terrace ocean views and their signature red hammock just waiting for you to swing oh and did i mention virgin voyages is launching a new ship the brilliant lady brilliant name by the way she's bigger bolder and packed with even more virgin wow factor book now at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor that's virginvoyages.com

Speaker 1 you know i was coming over here on my work over here i was like julio you gotta remember this time, be funny. This time, you just got to be

Speaker 1 funny.

Speaker 1 I am always so,

Speaker 1 I recess to audience member often. And I'm like, oh, these are funny and I'm enjoying it.
And I'm like, quietly like, hee hee. And then I'm like, oh, wait, no.

Speaker 1 Well, you couldn't wait to talk at the top. I know, I know.
And I have to be charming and engaging so that people will consume my product.

Speaker 1 Hashtag press. Hashtag press.
Hashtag press. Yeah, must be charming and engaging so that people consume my product.
So to that point, I would hypothetically go to a wedding there.

Speaker 1 Well, I was going to say, to that point, to that point, you would hypothetically go to a theme park.

Speaker 1 I'd go to a theme park. I think it's a good one.
I'll go to a theme park. I love Christmas.
I'll eat anything. Weddings are awesome.
Invest me.

Speaker 1 There.

Speaker 1 Love group fitness

Speaker 1 was praised for my attitude.

Speaker 1 Celebrated even. You're describing our lives.
You're describing what we have to put ourselves through. Yeah.
I enjoy group fitness. I will say the only thing about group fitness.

Speaker 1 This is why people consume your product.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 Well, then I'll say, okay, so here's the thing. Here's the other side of the coin, though.

Speaker 1 I am so enthusiastic about so many things that when I'm unenthusiastic about things, or if I'm negative about something, people are like, whoa.

Speaker 1 Or they like react to it weirdly. But then, I don't know.
The comment recently, I guess, has been like, that we like too many things. Okay, wait.

Speaker 1 Did you, were you in a don't leave the table till you finish anything household? Actually, my parents would not let me get up and leave the table unless my dinner was finished. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. Yeah.
See, I was in a

Speaker 1 my mom would be like, if you don't want to eat something, don't eat it.

Speaker 1 Don't eat it. Because if you ever do something that you don't want to do, it'll make you sick.

Speaker 1 Oh my God. Yeah.
That's actually very healthy. I like my whole childhood just white rice and saltines.
Because I was like, I don't like color. Color gives me a headache.

Speaker 1 White rice and saltines will be a little bit more. Yeah, just more white rice and saltines, please.

Speaker 1 I want to eat erasers. That was music.

Speaker 1 They look so yummy. They do look real yummy.

Speaker 1 Because you know what they look like?

Speaker 1 Gum. Gum.
Famously edible. But the big white ones.
Yeah. Big.

Speaker 1 Those felt so good in the hand. And it kind of, I just want to.
Yeah, when they were a little translucent.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh. Which is your favorite? I do.
I do. That's why I love tofu.
Just like open up a carton of tofu and eating it. It's like eating it.
Tofu is great. Tofu is amazing.

Speaker 1 Tofu does not get talked about enough as being one of the great things. Can I make tofu for you guys for dinner? And you guys don't have to, and no one can say it's good.
Are you good at making it?

Speaker 1 Like, I've never heard you say, I'm really good at preparing tofu. Babe, I make a good mapo tofu and I can make a good vegan version.

Speaker 1 And you guys would both like it, but not have to go through the whole Shareito saying, oh my God, this is so good. And I swear, I will not ever, ever once say, oh, it's fine.

Speaker 1 I did my best. We don't even

Speaker 1 silence.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Well, because that's our genuine friend. And he's not going to be like, oh, I'm upset because they didn't tell me how good the food was.
You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Not like that. It's not like that.
I will say there's one person whose food is restaurant quality, and it is Dave Mazzoni. His food is restaurant quality.
Wow. What is Dave Mazzoni? Italian feast.

Speaker 1 He'll just like, I remember one time we were there, like lasagna years ago. Yes, very that, like rich Italian food.
Like we were Bowen.

Speaker 1 Do you remember years ago when we were at doing some meeting for Pop Roulette at Dave's house? And then like out of nowhere, we didn't even smell it cooking. He just comes down with like

Speaker 1 so much lasagna and like cannolis. And like,

Speaker 1 it was just like, it was just like there was so much happening. And we were just like, oh my God.
And it was just like, excellent. But Italian food, you can't really mess up.
So Dave sucks.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Italian food, it is my understanding that when it's done very well, people really like it.
Oh, what? What? Are you not an Italian food fan? Oh, man. Yeah.
You don't eat that? Not no, I don't.

Speaker 1 I don't, not really. A lot of it has egg and cheese and butter.

Speaker 1 What is the current pop culture that you're consuming? Like, for example, have you hit play on the like Billie Eilish album at all? I have not hit play on the Billie Eilish album at all.

Speaker 1 What is the current pop culture that I'm consuming? By current, you mean like active? Like

Speaker 1 2024 to question mark. Yeah, no, 2024 to question mark.
Like, what's out right now? Like, what is the thing that's happening? And we know OMG is a lot of fun. Like, I want to engage in that.

Speaker 1 Like, I feel like

Speaker 1 I've been engaging in OMG fashion.

Speaker 1 What else? What else? What else? Perfect name, OMG fashion.

Speaker 1 It is the perfect name. I'm trying to like really anime is very daunting for me because there's so much of it.
So I never really know where to start.

Speaker 1 But I have been watching the show Pluto, which I hear Pluto's good. I really have been enjoying it.
It's daunting, but it's quick.

Speaker 1 You watch it in like a day or two because not a lot of them do more than one or two seasons. Unless it's like a huge show.
Yeah. And James, and your boyfriend knows all of the good ones too.
He does.

Speaker 1 He does. But then like the suggestion list is so long.
I know.

Speaker 1 yeah yeah you should watch assassination classroom assassination classroom do you want to teach them how to be assassins but okay here's the thing i don't i don't like bloody me neither it's not bloody can i tell you what the premise is the name assassination in it bowen i think you're gonna like it no no no here's why what's the truth well here's the plot and i'm yeah okay and i might put true but this is the plot An alien with a big yellow head

Speaker 1 and like two small eyes and a smiley face, like mouth, has blown up half of the moon

Speaker 1 and the world is like oh my god what's happening and then the alien where's the rest of the moon well yeah they're like oh my god the moon is gone like this is fucking up the gravity like you know gravity whatever okay and then this alien goes down to earth and takes over a school in japan

Speaker 1 and becomes a teacher at that school

Speaker 1 gets staffed well he like takes over the school and becomes a staff member and staffs himself, as it were.

Speaker 1 Gets an ID, the whole thing. The whole thing.

Speaker 1 Well, like, wears thought, like, does teacher drag, like, dresses up like a teacher, but has like an alien face and head or whatever.

Speaker 1 And he's teaching a class full of students, like, has a class full of students. He goes, if one of you can kill me,

Speaker 1 the only way you can get the moon back is if one of you kills me.

Speaker 1 But, like, they all like try to kill him, but he always like thwarts them. And there's a reason why this all happens.

Speaker 1 And it's actually a really well-constructed constructed story like i think you would both really like it assassination school that's assassination classroom classroom okay it's on crunchy roll i'm bookmarking that not only for watching and enjoying but also because it reminded me of my i don't think so honey which we'll say in a second but first i want to ask both of you if you have heard about this movie that just premiered at canned called the substance with damien moore and margaret qually tell us i have heard the buzz but i have not seen the movie so this is i guess it's like it's this movie that won best screenplay at Can.

Speaker 1 It like got like one of the longer standing ovations, which like they go off with standing ovations. They're handy.
They do love his body.

Speaker 1 And like, you know, just like really. They time them.
Yes. Yeah.
And Lily Gladstone, who Bowen is working with now, was on the canned jury. And I'm dying to find out what the T was about.

Speaker 1 watching this movie and what it was like because apparently it's a thriller right yes it's like a horror thriller but really it's body horror so it stars Demi Moore as an aging actress.

Speaker 1 She's like an Academy Award-winning actress. And her name, just to give you a sense of the tone, is Elizabeth Sparkle.

Speaker 1 So she plays Elizabeth Sparkle.

Speaker 1 She's a former Academy Award-winning actress who now does like fitness videos. So it's supposed to be like Jane Fonda.
She's up in years-ish. Like Hollywood has told her she's fucking ancient.

Speaker 1 She's really in her middle age. Like she essentially gets like replaced at her job, which is doing this fitness, you know, video because they're going to get like a younger person.

Speaker 1 She is told that she can start taking this supplement or this injection or whatever it is called the substance.

Speaker 1 And what it does is it literally allows your cells to replicate so that another younger, better quote-unquote version of you comes out of your spine splits, and the younger version of the other margin

Speaker 1 comes out of, and that's Margaret Quali.

Speaker 1 So basically, the rule is the you that's younger has to like sustain and take care of the older body for a week while you go live your life as the younger, more vibrant thing.

Speaker 1 Then, after a week, the older you comes to consciousness and has to maintain the younger body. So, basically, it becomes this story about body swap thing.

Speaker 1 Essentially, yes, but it's like the younger version apparently starts really feeling herself because she's young, beautiful, in the world is valuable.

Speaker 1 Yes, very that.

Speaker 1 I am a human. I have legs and eyes.
Yes, and sort of just like,

Speaker 1 like becoming a star in this younger body, but then goes to the old body and she walks around the, around the world and basically like everyone's like, like whatever, treating her like, I guess, Demi Moore.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? And she is unable to see that she's still valid in her older body. So the younger version starts to slip in terms of taking care of the older one.

Speaker 1 And the big rule of the movie is to remember that they are one organism or else things will be catastrophic. Like, no spoilers, because I don't know how what happens, but apparently.

Speaker 1 I know, also remarkable that you have not seen this movie. I know, but I'm fascinated by it.
Like, I've read so much about it because I also feel like I don't know if I'm going to sit through it.

Speaker 1 So I'm consuming a lot about it because it was the talk of the festival. Wait, what do you mean you don't know if you're going to sit through it?

Speaker 1 Because of what I'm about to say. So I am very squeamish too.
And apparently the third act is the most intense, graphic, sustained, violent body horror

Speaker 1 in cinema history since like the fly, like in the late 80s with Jeff Goldblum, like where his body essentially decomposes and like because he turns into a fly essentially.

Speaker 1 This movie was apparently had people like passing out and throwing up after watching it, but it was also very oh my god, it's been a while since we had those urban legends of like people, people like

Speaker 1 gave birth during the movie because it was like

Speaker 1 the last one in my memory was Passion of the Christ.

Speaker 1 People were screaming and

Speaker 1 weeping.

Speaker 1 It was bloodletting.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, that's so funny. But apparently, Demi Moore may even be up for an Oscar because she is like apparently incredibly

Speaker 1 fearless and brave in the way that she acts this last act.

Speaker 1 And also the fact that, like, she's confronting this thing that's been said about her for the majority of her career since she was, you know, young, people have been talking about her appearance, the way that she's, you know, conceptualized in everyone's mind's eye as like this idea of like cinematic perfection.

Speaker 1 And then that person got older, may have had work done, et cetera. The entire like trajectory of her career has had this shadow of, you know, the male gaze on it.

Speaker 1 And so for her to do this movie, I think she's getting a lot of like what apparently is well-earned praise for it. And the movie won best screenplay at Can because apparently it's just that bold.

Speaker 1 So, that's like a Greta Gerwig jury right there. So, I'm excited.
What do you mean it's a Greta Gerwig jury? She was the head of the jury. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Speaker 1 I thought you were saying it's a Greta Gerwig-esque jury. No, yeah, yeah, I was describing the vibe

Speaker 1 that people were doing.

Speaker 1 But just for her to preside over that jury and like, you know, her to be as like renowned and talented a writer as she is, and for her to give that best screenplay, I think is, is, you know, it's exciting.

Speaker 1 Wow. Greta, like, her vocabulary with like film history is like so wild.

Speaker 1 I'm like, oh, like, like, I heard some of her feedback, like, when she was sharing thoughts, all of her quotes were like, you know, it reminded me of the classical structures of a blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, oh my God, like, you really do know it all. Like, where does one learn? What would your master class be on? If you had a masterclass, what would it be on? Hmm.

Speaker 1 Fucking masturbating at the worst times of day.

Speaker 1 That would be my class what's the worst time

Speaker 1 we got the meme from this episode yeah

Speaker 1 what's the worst time of day um i'm gonna say like right before they need you on set yeah no no no no i like like four 4 p.m oh yeah yeah no that's pretty bad i actually was 10 minutes late to therapy because i like i had it at four and i like had to come at 3 15 p.m like something happened or later i was like i have to jack off and then i got in the car and i was we had traffic because i have to go all the way to pasadena Pasadena.

Speaker 1 And I was like, well, fuck this traffic. I'm like, no, fuck you, because you had to jack off at 3.15, 320.

Speaker 1 I do agree, it is the worst time. What was the name that I gave you? What was the name you gave me? Dustin.
Dustin Dallas. That's a Dustin Dallas move right there.
I will tell you this.

Speaker 1 Sorry, I'm late. I had to come.

Speaker 1 This is something I will, speaking of during the day, sexual behavior.

Speaker 1 I won't say who or why or what, but I was at one of those group fitness classes during the day a couple of weeks ago, and the instructor was so like

Speaker 1 hot and encouraging and so

Speaker 1 there was

Speaker 1 like all of it, just like the best version of what that person is. Where I went home, got on Grinder,

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 you went to Cerebro took a load in the middle of the day

Speaker 1 in the middle of the day. I never do that.
From him, no, from someone else. From someone else very much

Speaker 1 thinking about him.

Speaker 1 From a surrogate.

Speaker 1 I must find the ideal surrogate. Exactly, the substance.
To fulfill my fantasy.

Speaker 1 I must find.

Speaker 1 I must find the boy. And if not, a surrogate will have to do.
Yeah. A surrogate did it.
Was that your grinder name? I must find the boy. I must find the boy.
Or else a surrogate will have to do.

Speaker 1 And then I had a lot of, you know, surrogates come forward. Not a lot.
I mean, do you think the surrogate, you think you'll see the surrogate again? Actually, yeah. This guy

Speaker 1 fucking

Speaker 1 really, it was great. I actually was, it made me realize, like, huh, maybe

Speaker 1 sex during the day is the move. Oh, I love it.
Yeah, same. I think it's great.
You know, I don't know. I just, there's something about having sex in the daylight.
Oh, you love lighting.

Speaker 1 And the lighting is great. The reason I say 4:30 is you come, and then if you get lucky later on in the night,

Speaker 1 then you're like, oh, I already ate. Oh, I already ate, you know, and then it's like, oh, and then you kind of get some performance anxiety around that.
What a busy life.

Speaker 1 I think that's why I liked the daytime fuck because it was like, now I don't have to even encounter the thing at night because I'm not looking for it right.

Speaker 1 So I don't have to be disappointed at night. You know what I mean? Like I did that during the day and it was, it went really well.
So I don't have to feel bad about it later. Disappointed at night.

Speaker 1 Another great title for something. Disappointed at night.
For this episode. Disappointed at night.
Disappointed at night. That's beautiful.
I think it's my fourth time on Las Culturistas.

Speaker 1 My fourth time on Las Culturistas. Is it the fourth time or is it the third time? Fourth?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I mean, canonically, it's going to be fourth, I guess.
Because you were on once with Anna. You were on once.

Speaker 1 I remember your first episode was iconically called yes, dot dot dot because we talked about. I don't think that was my first episode.
That was not your first episode? Really? I don't think that's it.

Speaker 1 I think this is fourth. I think this is fourth.
Yeah, well, it's fourth no matter what. Okay.

Speaker 1 My fourth episode of Lost Cult. My fourth episode.

Speaker 1 Hooly. Should we do I Don't don't think so, honey? Yes.

Speaker 1 Oh, God. I told him.
Okay. Yeah.
Totally forgot this fourth episode.

Speaker 1 Oh my god.

Speaker 1 Powered by their best, most elite, high-performing tech, this Wi-Fi doesn't just connect devices, it keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful stressful time of the year.

Speaker 1 It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat and the video call with grandma doesn't freeze mid-cookie tutorial.

Speaker 1 It's Wi-Fi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic, chaos-free. The best present of all.
Let me paint a picture for you.

Speaker 1 A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet, and your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles.
Ah!

Speaker 1 And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your Wi-Fi has during this busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online so you know they're safe, even if you're busy making cocoa or taste-testing cookies.

Speaker 1 Bottom line, Xfinity Wi-Fi isn't just smart, it's brilliant. And during the holidays, that brilliance, that's a gift.
Xfinity, imagine that. Who decides what you can do?

Speaker 1 Who gets to decide what you're capable of? Your boss? Your friends? Some stranger on the internet? No, no, and absolutely no. You decide.

Speaker 1 It's like engineered into their vehicles. An F-150 is all steel, sweat, and dreams.
Right? Mm-hmm. A Ford Bronco is built for adventure, but you've got to get behind the wheel.
Can you? Yeah, you can.

Speaker 1 But you have to first. You have to.
And a Mustang? The Mustang that conquers curves. You are more capable than you know.

Speaker 1 Whether you think you can or you think you can't? You're right. Ready, set,

Speaker 1 Ford. Visit Ford.com to learn more.
You ever just stop in the middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break. It literally happened to me yesterday.

Speaker 1 I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes. Total reset.
Right? There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice-cold Diet Coke. It just hits.

Speaker 1 It's my little me moment, like make time for a Diet Coke break, you know? Exactly. Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments.
Diet Coke, this is my taste.

Speaker 1 Two questions. What are you doing right now? And why aren't you on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise? Well, obviously you were listening to us.
Smart use of your time. True.

Speaker 1 But you could also be on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise at the same time. That's just brilliant time management.
Very true. This gives me an idea.
Let's do a quick cruise quiz. Ready?

Speaker 1 First, cruise dining. Do you prefer a buffet or a curated dining experience with access to 20 distinct restaurants? Curated dining.
Next. Okay, good choice.
That's what Virgin Voyages offers.

Speaker 1 Second question. Would you rather have an overstuffed itinerary or the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean? Oh, I want the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean destinations.

Speaker 1 Again, I think I see where this quiz is going. Virgin Voyages is amazing.
Yeah, absolutely. The cruises are kid-free.
From sunrise yoga to late-night cocktails, every moment is made for grown-up fun.

Speaker 1 Nothing against kids. Kids are awesome, but sometimes it's nice to be kid-free.
And there's so much included value, over $1,000. Right, over $1,000 of awesomeness all included.

Speaker 1 Wi-Fi, soda, top-tier entertainment, over 20 restaurants, and even group fitness classes. No hidden fees, no surprise charges.
Virgin Voyages gives you the kind of luxury you actually deserve.

Speaker 1 And you know what? I deserve luxury. You do, and me too.
Yes. There's always something happening on board.

Speaker 1 From wellness-focused sailings to epic holiday voyages, live music, DJs, themed parties, and more. Boredom doesn't board the ship.
And there are so many amazing stops.

Speaker 1 You leave from Miami and sail to places like Grand Cayman, Jamaica, Puerto Rico, and the Dominican Republic. Virgin even has their own private beach club in Bibini.

Speaker 1 And they're adding stops in 2025 and 2026. Yeah, like Aruba, St.
Lucia, and Curaçao. But it's not all go, go, go.
Right, you can totally go into relaxation mode too. Your cabin is a full-on sanctuary.

Speaker 1 Private terrace, ocean views, and their signature red hammock just waiting for you to swing. Oh, and did I mention Virgin Voyages is launching a new ship, The Brilliant Lady?

Speaker 1 Brilliant name, by the way. She's bigger, bolder, and packed with even more Virgin Wow Factor.
Book now at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor. That's virginvoyages.com.

Speaker 1 Okay, so this is last cultureist us, this big segment. I don't think so, honey.
We do a one-minute, you know, twirl on something that's not so great.

Speaker 1 And the aliens of it all actually reminded me I woke up on the conspiracy side of the bed this morning and I've, my eyes have been opened to something and I really have to, I have to alert the world.

Speaker 1 Oh my God. This is Matt Rogers.
I don't think so honey's time starts now. I don't think so, honey, aliens existing.
I'll tell you what it is.

Speaker 1 If you don't think, my dad sent me a drone like light show. It was like a Star Wars drone light show.
And I was like, huh, you know what this reminds me of?

Speaker 1 Those unidentified flying objects that are all around that no one can explain. It's like, I'm sorry, but things moving unnaturally in the sky.
They're drones.

Speaker 1 I'll tell you who has more money than even NASA? Elon Musk. SpaceX is the reason why there are quote unquote aliens.
There are no aliens.

Speaker 1 What they're trying to do, and this is Elon Musk, and I'm saying this, and there's going to be a bounty on my head after I say this. I'm bravely saying it in all of college.

Speaker 1 Elon Musk wants us to believe that there are aliens so that he can start a war. We can have a common enemy.

Speaker 1 Okay. Because there's nothing more powerful than you creating your own army.
He wants to basically convince us all there are aliens

Speaker 1 so that we fear. the external and he will control us this way.
I don't think so, honey. And that's one minute.
Oh my God. That's how I feel.
I don't think there are aliens. I think it's SpaceX.

Speaker 1 You're most Marianne Williamson-coded thing yet. Oh, I say that.

Speaker 1 I go, oh, anytime someone says Marianne Williamson. Does anyone feel that I'm does anyone feel I'm right? Well, I don't know if you're right, but

Speaker 1 I do think that that is, it's compelling.

Speaker 1 Like, I watched this drone show and I was like, wow, like a drone show? It was like a Star Wars theme.

Speaker 1 They make shapes in the sky yeah like it's it's like essentially uh replacing fireworks shows so so you're gonna see less and less fireworks shows as time goes sorry it's like it's sky entertainment it's sky okay another okay

Speaker 1 that is the name of your LLC sky entertainment if it wasn't basic instincts inc it would be sky entertainment isn't that a great name maybe my last name is sky maybe i'm dustin sky yes oh dustin sky is good so it's like synchronized swimming but with robots 100 julio that's exactly what that is kind of cute cute it is programmed sky entertainment lights in the sky and basically they can control to do anything and also then you don't have like the environmental issue of like the fireworks every single night i guess because you're watching robots move around in the sky 100

Speaker 1 So basically, and they can do things that fireworks can't. Like they can create these designs and these lettering in the sky.
Like what you can see they're capable of is like mind-blowing.

Speaker 1 And I'm watching it and I'm like, I'm sorry, but who is out there still saying that there are aircrafts that move in ways that things can't move?

Speaker 1 I'm like, there are drones in the sky that can do anything. Like, why are we following this train of logic? I see your point.
It's like this helicopter went backwards and they don't do that.

Speaker 1 I have news for you. Yes, they do.
When they're not helicopters, they're drones. But Matt, how do you explain, like, pre-Elon Musk, like this was a phenomenon? Okay, I don't think it was.

Speaker 1 Oh, I don't think it was. I think UFO sightings have.

Speaker 1 Yes, people always said UFO sightings, but none of them could ever be substantiated. Now, all of a sudden, we have quote-unquote substantiated, like...
But we declassified a lot of these documents.

Speaker 1 Not we, I just mean the government has declassified a lot of you. They ask you to co-sign.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I co-sign.
They're like, I need Bowen's signature. Well, Bowen is Illuminati.

Speaker 1 I'm Illuminati. But like, I feel like this is slowly coming to the surface, but I respect, and I agree with Julio.
This is compelling. I don't know that I'm following you completely.

Speaker 1 This is all you need to know.

Speaker 1 Anytime you see something in the sky that's moving in like an unidentifiable pattern or like an unnatural way, the way that quote unquote birds don't move or quote unquote, you know, aircrafts don't move.

Speaker 1 It's like you should just watch a Star Wars drone show. Just watch it.
And then you'll understand that things very much do move like that. Wait, I'm sorry.
When you say Star Wars drone show.

Speaker 1 Yes, I do mean Disney, if that's your question. Oh, so this is at Disney.
Very much so.

Speaker 1 And what makes it a Star Wars drone show? It's it like they like form Princess Leia's face?

Speaker 1 i'm just going to show you on this okay because it's literally unbelievable my dad sent it to me like he does all the time so can you see this now look yeah look that's a drone that's not a firework that's supposed to mimic the two sons of tatooine

Speaker 1 and you'll see they're starting to drift slowly down as if the sun is setting okay And now they're disappeared. Now see that they've disappeared.
And now look what happens.

Speaker 1 They're rearranging. Oh, they've rearranged in seconds to create this death star in the sky.
And the death star is slightly rotating.

Speaker 1 So, what I'm saying is, if we are able to create this in the sky for entertainment, why would we think that Elon Musk and SpaceX or Bezos or whatever the fuck, whatever is going on, whoever has the amount of money that can do this in the sky would not try to control human ideology and fear as it relates to the unknown?

Speaker 1 Fear is a controller. And I feel that this is what's happening in a major way.
And I think that sheeple

Speaker 1 think it's aliens, but there are are no aliens.

Speaker 1 Wow. Okay.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 know, again, again, I think it's very compelling. I'm compelling.
I'll look into it. I'll look into it.

Speaker 1 You know, I was on, I was on mushrooms the other day and I was with Henry Kaprisky.

Speaker 1 And he said, You're making a really good point. And I pointed at him and looked in his eyes and said, I am very compelling.

Speaker 1 I am very compelling.

Speaker 1 I am very compelling. And he couldn't help but agree.
You always were. You always were.

Speaker 1 He always was.

Speaker 1 Just know that Elon Musk is going to assassinate me now.

Speaker 1 This part of the episode is going to be mysteriously not there anymore. No.
And I'm going to be the only one who knows the truth that the both of you were in cahoots with SpaceX. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Has anyone else's algorithm been feeding AI images of Elon Musk and Zuckerberg kissing in a hobby?

Speaker 1 Yes, yes, yes. I've gotten that.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of Elon Musk.

Speaker 1 It's like Elon and Mark Zuckerberg being a couple.

Speaker 1 It's like the whole thing. A very believable couple, I would say.
I'm like, oh, yeah, they're a T.

Speaker 1 It's like when people were doing the Trump Putin gay love thing, and it's like, now they're doing that with, but with new AI technology, it's like that same sort of goof.

Speaker 1 We've unlocked human potential. Oh, honestly, with AI, we've officially gone too far.
You want to know why? Because on this new season of the circle,

Speaker 1 one of the people competing is just full-on AI. And Michelle Bouteau is narrating it, being like, and the producers are not, they have no idea what this AI is going to do.
And it's just an AI.

Speaker 1 It's learning the game. It is learning the social dynamics that it's going to play.
And it's doing an incredible job so far.

Speaker 1 I've only watched one and a half episodes, but I'm like, I literally was like sitting here, like watching it.

Speaker 1 And I'm thinking to myself, like, at what point is the AI just going to learn to take over the show? Like, I just, the AI thing is

Speaker 1 really,

Speaker 1 and now we're having fun with it on Netflix's The Circle?

Speaker 1 I mean, I don't know. We've already sort of like get an AI host on the view.
Honestly, we're really close.

Speaker 1 Like, wouldn't it be fun if one of the hosts was AI? Would it have compelling things to say? You've already asked the question, and you don't have to pay that host.

Speaker 1 Right. You won't have to pay it.

Speaker 1 Can't believe it. Like, if they're basically saying, like, oh, like, what if this AI like wins the circle? What then? It's doing a really good job.
It's better at social stuff than humans.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 What is the circle?

Speaker 1 Yeah, what is it, bro? It's a game show? It's like a game show where everyone is locked in their own rooms and they only communicate through this social media platform.

Speaker 1 And then people have to like, it's as if like influencers was gamified.

Speaker 1 Like the whole concept of like being likable on the internet was like gamified into like a survivor slash like big brother style of like eliminating people. It's fun.

Speaker 1 It's really like it becomes very compelling. It is like

Speaker 1 a little dystopic and it is like kind of simplifying, oversimplifying what social media is, but it's fun to watch. But I'm going to watch, I haven't watched in a while.
I'm going to watch this one.

Speaker 1 It's just interesting because like they're all in their own room. They all have these avatars and that's how they communicate.

Speaker 1 And some of the real humans that are being themselves are communicating and you see the other people sort of like digest the way that they've said hello.

Speaker 1 And they're like, hmm, that person sounds really wooden. And I bet that person's a catfish because a lot of them are catfish.
That's like part of the game.

Speaker 1 And they're fully real human beings expressing themselves normally. And then this AI comes in, aware of the fact that they need to have more of a personality.
So it's like

Speaker 1 they say things like a little bit off beat. A little bit off, like else on when they meet in or whatever.
Yes. And basically the AI has chosen its avatar and its personality and its like age.

Speaker 1 And like, it's a guy. It's like a white guy in its mid-20s.
It looks like cute, but not handsome, like non-threatening, holding a cute dog.

Speaker 1 And the AI is like, studies have shown that 70% of photos of dogs like do better. Like you automatically are a more likable person.
And it's like working.

Speaker 1 You see the other people, the contestants being like, I love that dog. I know I'm going to get along with Adam.

Speaker 1 There's, I guess, like, there's some magazine or something that does like videos of like during press junkets.

Speaker 1 Like the one I saw a clip of was Chris Hemsworth and Annie Taylor Joy like playing with puppies.

Speaker 1 And there's something so like dark and primal about that. Yep.
About being like, here are these two beautiful blonde people playing with dogs.

Speaker 1 Enjoy it.

Speaker 1 Eat it. And it is widely enjoyed.
Eat that thing. Eat this.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Here's some content. It's like woof.
It's slow. To say nothing of the dogs, but woof.

Speaker 1 Woof. Why am I saying it like woof? You find out I'm AI.

Speaker 1 I think I'm the least AI out of all of us, to be honest.

Speaker 1 Refreshingly human. Boen Yang, AI.
I am.

Speaker 1 I'm AIAF. Well, let's find out what AI has to say.
Bo and Yang, do you have an I don't think so, honey? I do. It's very, very stupid.
It's not. But I think people will relate.

Speaker 1 This is Boen Yang's relatable. I don't think so, honey.
His time starts now. I don't think so, honey.
Cutting up a bell pepper, there is no agreed upon way to slice bell pepper.

Speaker 1 And we're all, this is why language and communication is broken down across the world. It's not social media.

Speaker 1 It's because we have not settled on a way to chop up bell pepper in our salads, in our soups, in our stews, in our snacks.

Speaker 1 Everyone's like, oh, you got to cut around the stem or, oh, you got to like get the white, like pithy stuff out. You got to get like the

Speaker 1 rounded part out. It has to be straight strips.
No, we have to agree upon one way to cut bell pepper. Otherwise, this is the tower of Babel all over again.

Speaker 1 If we can't agree on how to do this one simple thing, then what hope do we have as a civilization? What hope do we have?

Speaker 1 for society, for the way that, why are we growing these damn vegetables in the first place if we're not even going to agree on how to use them? It's not about personal preference.

Speaker 1 It's about making sure there's a standard way and a way that sort of encourages equality. And that's one minute.
I was going to say it's like the Tower of Babel all over again.

Speaker 1 We must find a way of cutting the pepper that encourage equality. Equality and community.
That was really important.

Speaker 1 There's no community around bell peppers.

Speaker 1 Well, I will say, in terms of the stem, you definitely do have to cut around the stem. And I think that the rule of thumb with bell peppers is you just have to do a little bit more work.

Speaker 1 You have to dice them more than you think. but it's worth it, it is worth it.
I love bell pepper, oh, certainly, Julia. What do you think as a vegan? How do you feel about bell pepper?

Speaker 1 I think they're very important.

Speaker 1 How do you feel about it? I think they're very important. Yeah, you love the question, you love the witness.

Speaker 1 Very leading question.

Speaker 1 How do you feel about it? I think it's very important. How do you feel about representation? I think it matters

Speaker 1 is going to still say the truth, no matter how you look at it. I know, I know.
Talk about bell peppers.

Speaker 1 I, uh, to me, bell peppers are neither a plus nor a minus. They're like iceberg lettuce to me.
They're like, but iceberg lettuce is no nutritional value. If it's there, I'll have it.

Speaker 1 I'll never miss it. Okay, fine.
What's your like, if you had to make like sort of like your little vegan lunch, what is it?

Speaker 1 I think my favorite food. Well, sushi.
What?

Speaker 1 Do you like sushi? Sushi. Oh, sushi.
No, but I do like meals that are contained.

Speaker 1 So sushi is very good.

Speaker 1 A burrito, I think, is really good because it's a big capsule of food. Yes.
And by contained, you mean like actually the food keeps itself together. The food keeps itself together.
Yes.

Speaker 1 I don't need you unraveling in front of me. Right.
Got it. Got it.
Got it. Got it.
Got it. Got it.
Got it. Got it.
Yeah. So you go to Chipotle, let's just say you're certainly not going to get like

Speaker 1 a Chipotle. Well, but you wouldn't get a burrito bowl.
If I hypothetically had to go to a Chipotle, I would not get a burrito bowl. Right.

Speaker 1 Is a taco self-contained? That unravels in front of you very often. A taco is needy, right? A taco needs to be held.
So needy. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Needs to be held, or else it's nothing. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're right.

Speaker 1 Sushi needs nothing from you. It's so true.
It's so true. Sushi needs nothing from you just to enjoy it.
You know, there's a lot of people out there thinking that you can't eat too much sushi.

Speaker 1 I have to say, last night I found out that wasn't true. You can.
Yeah. Because I woke up this morning and I felt like garbage and I was like, what happened? Too much sushi.

Speaker 1 And then I realized, well, it's because a lot of people are talking about how they don't think you can eat too much of it. What do you hear?

Speaker 1 No, Matt. Listen to your body.
I don't really remember where I heard it, but it's out there. But the sushi doesn't need anything from you.

Speaker 1 Do you know what I mean? That still doesn't change the fact that sushi does not ask anything of you and it's on you you that you ate so much. Yeah.
It's a theory. I understand what you're saying.

Speaker 1 I'm not really following, but

Speaker 1 is that what I said to you about the drones? Yeah, I think it's compelling.

Speaker 1 I don't really understand what you're saying, but. Wow.
That's not how I said it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 we'll talk about this offline. Okay, Julio, are you ready to do I Don't Think So, honey? Yeah, and I'm actually very proud of it because I just thought about it.
Okay. I did not prepare.

Speaker 1 This is Julio julio tore's i don't think so honey time starts now i don't think so honey the barricade around the portal are you familiar with are you familiar with the portal no it's the circular

Speaker 1 portal in new york it's like a big screen with a live feed between manhattan and i want to say dublin And the whole thing is that like tourists in both cities can just like wave at each other.

Speaker 1 There's a barricade. 30 seconds.
Where Where is it? I want to say it's Madison Square Park, maybe. There's a barricade.

Speaker 1 And there is a barricade around the portal, guarding the portal, because too many people were exposing themselves in both countries. 15 seconds or just showing foul things to each other.

Speaker 1 But frankly, if you don't trust the public with public art, we have failed as a society. Five seconds.

Speaker 1 If public art is too delicate or begs itself to be used in a specific way, then you are condescending to the audience and we don't need it. Oh, and that's one minute.
That's beautiful. That was really

Speaker 1 not only was it beautiful to hear you say, I don't think so, honey, the barricade around the portal,

Speaker 1 but also the facts were there too. If public art can't be public, we've failed.

Speaker 1 Yeah. If public art can't be public, we have failed.
Release the portal.

Speaker 1 Open the portal.

Speaker 1 Drop the barricade to the portal. Drop the barricade to the portal at once.

Speaker 1 If I were mayor, and I will be someday, that is the first thing I'll do. I will say, drop the barricade to the portal.
Everyone must have access to the portal. That would be my first tweet as mayor.

Speaker 1 You're not going to be mayor. Yes, I will be.
No, you have a thriving Hollywood career, whether you like it or not. Well, look, look at Reagan.

Speaker 1 Look at Reagan.

Speaker 1 Look at Schwarzenegger. Yeah, look at Schwarzenegger.
I'll do it. Now, the portal is beautiful.
I've just looked up. I've never seen this in the city.
Me neither. Well, it's flopping.

Speaker 1 It's giving the vessel all over again.

Speaker 1 The vessel is so sad. The vessel is just like.

Speaker 1 Have I shown you my collection of guys on Tinder that have pictures with the vessel? Yes. I would love to see it.
A lot of gay guys, exclusively gay guys, that the people you see on the guys.

Speaker 1 Those are the only ones I can see on Tinder. They won't let me see anything else.
The vessel is the gay Machu Picchu.

Speaker 1 So, so, like, straight guys on Tinder will stand at Machu Picchu and pretend like, can you believe where I am? I'm a man of the world. Yeah, it's like, I sell a vessel.

Speaker 1 There's any man Marcus posted here. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I have something I want to bring to the group. Go ahead.
There are pop stars.

Speaker 1 Let's just say pop stars. Are there just artists that are either portals or mirrors?

Speaker 1 That is beautiful. That is absolutely beautiful.
And I can tell you who's a portal and who's a mirror. Beyonce's a portal.
Taylor Swift is a mirror. There you go.
I think you're right.

Speaker 1 Beyonce transports you somewhere, brings you somewhere into a new experience. Taylor Swift is about relatability.
It's about reflecting the audience back at them. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I do think that there is a case to be made for Katy Perry is mirror. Katy Perry is a mirror.

Speaker 1 Katy Perry's music exists to make you feel a certain way, whereas you listen to like some of these other artists and it's like, this exists mostly as an artistic expression. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 That is very beautiful. And I think there is...
We need to get you a doctorate. I'm going to say there's validity in both.
Of course there's validity in both. One is not better than the other.

Speaker 1 No, of course. I do think that when people were talking about, like, oh, what was better, like the Renaissance tour or the Eras tour?

Speaker 1 And I was like, I think I can't pinpoint why they're equally different and valid because one was a mirror experience and one was a portal experience. Yeah.
Yeah. Yes.

Speaker 1 I think there's definitely room for both. I think mirrors comfort us

Speaker 1 and portals propel us. Yes.
And they're both necessary.

Speaker 1 That's really good. But sometimes mirrors can scare us the most.

Speaker 1 And so can portal. Portal, sometimes you need a portal.
And sometimes, dot, dot, dot. Mirrors can scare us the most.

Speaker 1 The most.

Speaker 1 That's a very like desperate housewives. Absolutely.
Outro. Edie Brit punches the medicine cabinet.
Mirrors. Mirrors.
We use them to take a look before we leave the house.

Speaker 1 To check out husband's tie before he leaves the house.

Speaker 1 To inspect some pesky mascara in the corner of our eye yes mirrors comfort us

Speaker 1 shoring us of our own image but what if a mirror showed us what was never there

Speaker 1 oh my god i'm let me tell you something i am re-watching desperate housewives now oh my god i want to do it

Speaker 1 where's alfre woodard She's working. She's thriving.
But I want to see her mom. I would imagine booked somewhere.
Yeah, no, she is. I checked.
Betty Applewhite. Betty Applewhite.
What a name.

Speaker 1 Well, Julio, this is your fourth time on Lost Cults. This is it.
We're so grateful. This is it.
This is it. No more.
This is me.

Speaker 1 Now. This is me.

Speaker 1 Now. Did you watch that? Yes, I did last night.
You actually did? I did last night. What did you think? We just need your abridged take on This Is Me Now.

Speaker 1 Compelling. Compelling.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Although, hold on.

Speaker 1 I'm going to leave everybody on this. I can't tell if J-Lo is a portal or a mirror.
She's a mirror. J-Lo is a mirror, and this is me.Now, aspire to be a portal.
Yes, 100%.

Speaker 1 That was of course, but I don't see

Speaker 1 myself in J-Lo. Like, I don't know what you do, but maybe not do it.
It's not for you to see yourself in J-Lo. But if you do see yourself in J-Lo, you really see yourself.

Speaker 1 You really see yourself in J-Lo. Yeah.
Right. Okay.
It's the thing of like, are you a fragrance or vitamin water? What? You know what I mean? It's that thing.

Speaker 1 Are you Charlie Steron

Speaker 1 stomping to Dior a portal or are you Jennifer Aston for vitamin water yes I see

Speaker 1 yeah amazing we need both Zendaya is both interesting I don't think Zendaya is vitamin water is she I think Zendaya is like all of it in her heart is the Disney girl and she kind of can't she'll never like totally escape that no matter how artistically and critically successful she is like she'll always be a little bit like one second away from like Skechers.

Speaker 1 It's the S.

Speaker 1 What is that that you just said? Skechers is the S? Yeah. That's sort of a shoe campaign.
Her doing a Skechers commercial. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Got it. That's interesting.
Like, we haven't escaped the world where it's like Zendaya for Spearman gum. You know what I mean? Like, probably not soon.

Speaker 1 Well, okay, here's what I'll say: is I did not know she was a Disney star. She was.
Shake it out. Doesn't that change things a little bit?

Speaker 1 Well, no, but I'm saying is I was not seeing her through that lens, and I was perfectly satisfied. She's ascended that for sure.
Yeah, she's the most crossover mirror portal person we have currently.

Speaker 1 Wow, interesting. She's a mirror portal.
She's a mirror portal.

Speaker 1 She's what Lana Del Rey would call a glass spaceship. I love that.
And Lana's a portal through and through. 100%.
Yes,

Speaker 1 well, much to discuss with infinite people. When we come back.
When we come back. On hour eight of Last Cultures.
I'll be right back. Phantasmas.
It's out on June 7th. June 7th on HBO.
On HBO.

Speaker 1 But you watch it via HBO Max, I think.

Speaker 1 Well, it's Max.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, no. Sorry.
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
Yes. Sorry, Saslav.
We met Max. Sorry, David.

Speaker 1 Kiss is love. Sorry, David.
Kiss is love. Sorry, David.
Kiss is love. It's actually Roller Coacher number 99.
Sorry, David. Kiss is love.

Speaker 1 Well, this has been a joy, delight, and more. We end every episode with a song.

Speaker 1 Oh, that you sing.

Speaker 1 Yes, got it. Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's end it there.

Speaker 1 Bye. Bye.
Bye.

Speaker 1 Lost Culture East. This is the production by Will Farrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio Podcasts.
Created and hosted by Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang.

Speaker 1 Executive produced by Anna Hasnie and Hans Sani. Produced by Becca Ramos.
Edited and mixed by Doug Beam and Monique Laborde. And our music is by Henry Komirsky.

Speaker 1 There's pressure systems moving in Bo in the form of cuffing season.

Speaker 1 Potential heavy clouds of nostalgia around the necks, windstorms from a current situation ship, and light drivels of you up, techs, are incoming.

Speaker 1 It's the chill in the air that brings about this behavior.

Speaker 1 In the midst of cuffing season, there's one place where the microclimate is clear communication, radical honesty, and open-mindedness, and that's Field.

Speaker 1 It's a connections app that asks you to show up and articulate your desires as clearly as you understand them now. And if you don't understand them, say that.

Speaker 1 The Field community is made up of so many different kinds of people ranging in experience, interests, and desires. Here you can have the space to change, to be honest, and to always be curious.

Speaker 1 Wondering what that looks like? Here's a snapshot of Field. There's no fast swipe culture.
Sometimes attraction takes time.

Speaker 1 Here, you don't have to make a split decision in order to see another person. Skip profiles, go back, and take the time you need to decide if you really like someone.
You can expand your curiosity.

Speaker 1 There are over 20 sexuality and gender identities listed on Field. In this space, you can explore who you are, Sans judgment.
And there's no pretending.

Speaker 1 There's no need to write your profile like a job application and pretend to be what someone else wants. Within the Field community, the cultural norm is to be radically honest.

Speaker 1 It helps you find exactly what you're seeking. That's F-E-E-L-D.
Download Field on the App Store or Google Play. You can't spell culturistas without R-I.

Speaker 1 That's right. Rhode Island is the perfect place not just for the culturistas of the world, but all the other Easters too.

Speaker 1 We're talking about the food Easters, the theateristas, the natureists, the luxuristas. Whatever you're an Easter for, you'll find it in the ocean space.

Speaker 1 So start packing those bags and be the best Easter you can be. Rhode Island.
All that.

Speaker 1 Plan your trip at visitroadisland.com. That's visitroadeland.com.
Big news, Aldi is now on Uber Eats, and you get 40% off your first order with code NEWALDI25.

Speaker 1 So whether your fridge is empty and you're too tired to shop, or you just ran out of essential ingredients in the middle of meal prep, don't worry.

Speaker 1 Fill your fridge in just a few taps and get 40% off your first Aldi order on Uber Eats. For orders $30 or over, you can save up to $25.
Ends December 31st. See app for details.

Speaker 1 Get ready for your next TV obsession, All's Fair, starring Kim Kardashian, Naomi Watts, Nisi Nash Betts, Tiana Taylor, with Sarah Paulson, and Glenn Close, a team of fierce female divorce attorneys leave a male-dominated firm to start their own.

Speaker 1 Filled with scandalous secrets and shifting allegiances both in the courtroom and within their own ranks, these ladies know that lawyers are a girl's best friend.

Speaker 1 Don't miss All's Fair, now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.
This is an iHeart podcast.

“My Fourth Time on Las Cultch” (w/ Julio Torres)

Press play and read along

Transcript

More episodes from Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang

Introducing: CrimeLess

"Elevated Messy" (w/ Rachel Sennott)

"The Protagonist" (w/ Heather Gay)

“Drinkin' The Soda” (w/ Brittany Snow)

"All Up In The Macabre" (w/ Sarah Paulson)