“I’m The Party” (w/ Amy Poehler)

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You know, on Lost Culture Recess, we dive deep into the culture and get real with our guests. Likewise, on IMO, Michelle, Craig, and their guests tackle questions from listeners just like you, offering practical advice, personal storytelling, and plenty of laughs.
From dating and relationships to family and faith, Michelle and Craig give their candid perspectives to the everyday questions shaping our lives and the world around us. Like their first episode where Issa Rae laments friendships that need to go.
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So if you want to know about the culture that made Michelle and Craig say culture is for them, check out IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson wherever you get your podcasts. Look, man.
There. Oh, I see.
Wow. Bowen, look over there.
Wow, is that culture? Yes. Oh, my goodness.
Wow. Las Culturistas.
Ding dong. Las Culturistas calling.
Get into it. Mayhem in the Desert.
Mayhem in the Desert merch. My favorite color.
The color that works best for me and my skin tone. Neon.
I can't tell if you're joking because Matt is one of our olive toned legends. And you really must cherish this fact about yourself.
I like. Can I say as a platonic person in your life? Here we go.
You looked really good this weekend. Shut up.
Were you looking at my photos? Gensley clad. I sort of went there in my photos.
You could have withheld from posting. I didn't want to.
And one of the sort of fringe things that happens, one of the fringe consequences is that sometimes your friends go, oh, sometimes your friends get a little chub for you. It's actually rule of culture number 16.
Sometimes your own friends get a little chub for you. Well, thanks.
Awkward. Wait, can I say, lucky for you,, because I've went to, I now went to weekend one,

we're going to weekend two.

Yeah.

It's going to be,

hmm, 20 degrees colder.

In a good way.

It's going to be,

yes.

Oh, thank God.

It's going to be in the mid 70s

for my legend.

Oh.

The God said,

it's Bowen Yang's first Coachella.

Cool it down.

Cool it down.

Although,

earthquake today.

Oh,

heard about this

when I was driving back.

Couldn't feel a thing

because I was gunning it.

Right. In the HOV.
And you were, you were bouncing on that thing that you couldn't even. Sometimes you were just boom, boom, boom.
I haven't felt an earthquake once. No, that's a lie.
That's not true. We were in Palm Springs the last time we felt an earthquake.
Felt that one. Yeah.
Neutra Johari was sitting next to me. Yes.
Sandy Honig was there. Sandy Honig was there.
We were stoned. And we were at the we were at the Tropicana eating dinner.
Tropical, I'm sorry. Eating dinner.
Full on earthquake. Yeah.
I was eating like my chicken piccata or whatever the fuck. And then I was like, Mitra Duhari is shaking her ass in this booth.
What is going on? Which was unlike her. She usually just sits very still and eats.
Very still and eats. And then we realized in the commotion at the restaurant that it was an earthquake.
A locomotion. Loco motion.
Kylie was not at Coachella. She's everywhere else.
She's everywhere else. It was the New York gay night last week, the Kylie Minogue concert.
And I was going to try to go, but we were at work. I've seen her on accident 19 times in the last year.
And that's not to say it needs to be an accident for me to see Kylie Minogue. It just so happens everywhere I am, Kylie Minogue is.
That's amazing. Oh, that's so nice.
You must understand how important Kylie Minogue is. She's important to the culture.
She's invited on the pod. We would have a great conversation with Kylie.
Starting with the locomotion and going all through her career. Just to speak quickly on Gaga, it was un-fucking-believable.

You're going to have the best time.

And also, Charlie was amazing.

I'm so excited to go with you.

I'm so excited.

But here's the thing.

In order to sort of get there,

we have this other milestone that's happening,

which is this episode

that we're doing today.

I have to say,

probably the reason I do comedy

is sitting across from us.

Yes!

And what an instant,

what a nice, soothing soul moment that it's so easy to be around her. I walked in, she was making coffee, stirring her mug with a knife.
It's a knife win. It's a knife win.
Period. Period.
So this is a big day, Bo. She's already podcasting royalty.
Number one in the land. Not even a month into the game.
And she's number one in the land. Good hang on Spotify.
Hey, Joe Rogan, shut up. Get bent over.
Cool it. Cool it.
It is fantastic. Just as the title suggests, it's a good hang.
We'll talk about the format because there are some innovative things. You thought you couldn't innovate in the podcasting space.
No. You haven't met our guests.
Yeah. Restless Like Tours Back, one of my favorite live comedy shows in the last lifetime of mine.
And my last lifetime, it's my favorite live comedy show. The blueprint of two people doing comedy.
Literally. There had never been anyone before.
Carol Burnett and Julie Andrews, who? That's my. Gay man.
Julie Andrews and Carol Burnett is like, that's so funny. Like you think of them as like the comedy icons.
But we forget about them as comedy duo icons. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean? They turned it. You know what we need to do? We need to do Abbott and Costello meet the monsters, but Matt and Bowen meet the monsters.
Yes. I'm pitching this to Universal.
Have us meet the Wolfman. I'm serious.

This is a film franchise.

This is Matt and Bowen meet Dracula,

meet the Bride of Frankenstein.

Meet Victoria Frankenstein.

We're coming for her. Have you heard about Victoria

Frankenstein, the great-granddaughter

of... Well, let's ask her

after we bring her in.

She's a legend. Everyone, please, well done.

Amy Bowler! Hi! That was like being at my own funeral. Floating above.
Yes, I was dissociating. Rise like the monsters.
Have you heard about Victoria Frankenstein? Oh my gosh, I don't know. We asked Tina the same exact thing in her episode.
Did she tell you? Yes, and she mixed up with Lisa Frankenstein, the Diablo Cody movie. Okay.
But have you heard about Victoria Frankenstein? Yes. I think so.
She basically, tell me more. So there's the new theme park in Universal Studios in Orlando, Epic Universe.
And there's a, the dark universe, which is sort of like all the monsters and the big ride in the pre-show. It's hosted by Victoria Frankenstein, who is like the girl boss great-granddaughter of Victor Frankenstein.
Ooh. And her whole gig is she wants to show that the monsters can be contained.
And she wants to basically take you around the mansion so you can see all the monsters and you know something goes wrong. She's like Dom energy.
Like, I got it covered and then she's in over her head. No.
And this just goes to show you like, can women Dom? We wanted to know from you. Should women be in charge? That's what we're here to talk about.
And the answer is maybe. Maybe.
Maybe. For chance.
I think because it's a theme park ride and something's going to go wrong, people are going to have a lot to say. Everyone leaving is, all those Florida people leaving are going to be like, well.
I know you guys are big theme park people. I am not.
So this is where you and Tina sort of go. In fact, Tina and I just did a show in Orlando and she was very excited to get me to go on the rides and I did not want to go on the rides.
I'm not a theme park person. All right.
Sorry. I know it's lame.
No, don't apologize. First of all, we are the ones who should probably take a seat.
Our guide was talking about you too. Wait, okay.
Was it Sam? Sam. Yeah.
Lovely. And he had the best time with you.
We had the best time with him. And he was really a classic.
He was the perfect prototype of what you want that person to be. Oh, yeah.
Disney yes one of them it's and too many like too far away too far away too spread out spread out um a lot of the same images kind of like being projected at you from like plato's cave you know what i mean like Like, you're like, is this an illusion?

It's not.

It's real.

Like,

you have to come out.

I'm also at an age

where I don't want to be shook anymore.

Like,

I don't want to be so shook.

Yeah,

this is not good.

I can't handle it anymore.

Sure,

sure.

I don't like being nauseous.

I don't like the lack of control.

It definitely feels like

I never get to the,

it's like when people say

when you get a runner's high.

Yeah,

I never had it.

And it never happened. That's what it feels like at those theme parks, you get a runner's high, and you never happen.

That's what it feels like at those theme parks,

which is like,

aren't you feeling it?

And you're like,

I'm so sorry.

I'm not,

I don't know.

Do you know what's the,

what's the thing that I never realized about all theme parks until I brought a friend who pointed it out.

And then I can't unhear it every time.

The music never stops.

It's always...

That's how it is in my brain all the time, I think.

Maybe we share that with Tina.

But it never stops being adventure music in my brain.

So Greta was like, it doesn't stop, does it?

It never stops.

I was like, oh, I guess not.

And Dratch and Tina and I were all together and they went and had dinner at Epcot, Mexico and I was supposed to meet them and they texted me and they were like, you would hate it here. Don't come.
And I was like, that's a real friend. That's a real friend.
I literally know where they went because those guides have a place they take us. And then there's a Neil Patrick Harris cocktail.
There's a Neil Patrick Harris cocktail. Is it a Doogie Howser cocktail? No, it's like a horchata thing.
I tried it. I didn't love it, Neil.
I'm sorry. That's okay.
I just had a tequila rocks. That's okay.
But you guys are normally so aligned on your activities on tour. Yeah, we're pretty, we, we do like very similar things.
We go to Bloomingdale's. We like get us by a sweater.
We like have, you know, we watch like, we got to watch the white Lotus finale in our hotel. And that was really fun.
And yeah, we do like simple, like we're like, ooh, like did you see there's like a place for croissants around the corner? We'll go get one. That's about it.
But yeah, this one, we were not aligned. That's okay.
That's okay. But they knew that the Mexican place was not your good one.
That is what a real friend, don't you feel like a real friend knows, don't come here. A real friend sometimes says you're not invited for your own good.
That's a rule of culture number 30. A real friend sometimes says you're not invited for your own good.
Well, talk about this idea. Do you feel like your life is scored? Because I'm watching The Pit now and I'm loving that it's not.
Love The Pit. I love The Pit.
I gotta get into the pit. Can I just say, we wrote a parody of the pit called The Ditch and it was East London.
It took place in Shoreditch Medical. It was me, Ego and Jonaham speaking in East London accents.
And it was, it did not do great at dress because no one understood what we were saying. So that's- Sometimes you gotta wait for the culture to catch up.
I feel like the people are just now talking about the pit. Yes.
Yeah. I feel like TikTok loves the pit.
My TikTok loves the pit. But I mean, I look, Noah Wiley, I've been a Noah Wiley stand for 20.
I mean, I've, I watched the entirety of ER three times. That was your show.
I watched it again during the pandemic. And then I watched it in the, when it came on, I used to be doing like improv at night and waiting tables.
That was it. And I would smoke a bong at like seven o'clock and watch ER reruns.
Let's go. Because I used to be on like TNT and then like go to work or go to a comedy show.
And so I feel like I've known Noah forever. Yeah.
And to see him back in scrubs has to be surreal. Yeah, and you know, Dr.
Robbie's not in scrubs.

He's got his hoodie over the scrubs.

He has a hoodie.

This is why I need to watch The Pit.

He's, yeah.

I have to know what's up.

Yeah, but it's so good.

It's so good.

A bong, huh?

You were for real.

I used to, yeah, that was back, you know,

let's see, 90, I was living in East Village.

So I was 26, maybe?

Very similar life.

Maybe he's still too old.

No.

Our friend Dave had a bong probably until we were 27 and then 28 and then it broke which is the only reason we stopped using it but I couldn't believe how high I would get to watch Homeland like fully Claire Danes having a very real breakdown like we have to get her in that chair at some point and be like how did did you survive? Because she's shaking and convulsing because of her own brain. And I'm sitting there so high, like just taking that.
Actually, when I was coming up here in the elevator, there was a gentleman, a gentleman, a nice young gentleman and a young lady. And he had a chart with all this red string.
And it smelled so much like weed. They really, really reeked of weed.
And I was like, oh, I thought to myself, oh, weed, remember that? Like I, it's been so long and I just had that, it was like nostalgic. Yeah.
We might be hitting that developmental time now between the two of us. Well, I don't know.
I don't know. I was so back this weekend.
It's very strong. Oh yeah, you were coaching.
No, well, actually it is.

It gets, well, what I like now is that there's

so, it's such a science now that

you can kind of know exactly what it is.

Yeah. Yeah.

I'm, yeah, I, that was a different

time when I felt like I had no

real responsibilities, even though I felt like my life

was overwhelming. I didn't have a lot

of responsibilities. So it was like,

okay,

if I was a little stone,

but now I don't think I could handle it.

Not anymore.

I think my ideal trip that my ideal trip is what you and I have connected on,

which is what you've talked about in the last time I saw restless leg,

which was going to Iceland.

One of your sons or both of them.

Yeah.

With one of my sons. And just them.
Yeah, with one of my sons, yeah.

And just enjoying, just getting high off of nature.

Yes.

How about that?

Well, I also think that I've gotten to a point

where, I mean, I don't barely drink anymore,

where I know this sounds super cheesy,

but actually being conscious,

like actually just being in the moment

is like a high, is a win.

Because I'm always future tripping

or I'm always thinking about what I just said

Thank you. conscious like actually just being in the moment is like oh is like a high is a win because i'm always future tripping or i'm always thinking about what i just said or did and i just feel such less personality hangover in general when i'm not altered so i'm not that into being altered right now wow with like and also i'm older and it just like you need a lot of time recover.
And I stopped drinking right before the pandemic and was really grateful that I didn't really do it during it. And now it's not a, I'm not in a program or anything, but just like every once in a while, maybe have a thing, but I don't really need it.
And it just feels very good. Yeah.
Honestly, whenever I take my like six weeks, I feel like, wow, this is the new me. But I have over, I don't know what is the new me but i have over i don't know what weeks is alone i don't know what it is about the past two years but maybe it's just mid-30s where i'm just like sobriety maybe and then i'm like and then and then like that all goes away i'm like nah not for me yeah i i do think i can if i look to the future, I can see it for myself at some point.

I can see it.

Alcohol is poison.

Yeah.

But it's okay.

You know,

you can have a little poison.

Like just like sugar is poison.

You can have a like,

sugar,

it's all poison.

Yeah.

But I think,

especially as a woman of a certain age,

you do start to feel the poison a little bit more.

The poison really turns on you.

Yeah.

And it just,

you don't get the same kind of thing anymore. No, it goes away.
Is it the microplastics in our brain as well? Yeah. I'm sorry to bring this up.
Are you worried about microplastics? We were thinking of writing an update about, because this thing came up in last week, this New York Times piece came out about microplastics. The equivalent of a spoon is in your head.
It's in all

of our brains. No, stop.
The equivalent of a

plastic spoon? You guys haven't heard this?

The equivalent of a plastic

Dairy Queen's

Blizzard spoon is

in our brains

in little granules, and there's really

nothing we can do about it.

Yeah.

Come on. First of all, you can't tell me that we're not better off than generations ago.
We drink water. How about that? Well, that they didn't back.
We did not drink water growing up. You're right.
You're right. About water and ever.
Are you being serious? Yes. Yes.
School. No one made us drink water.
No one talked about water. Water was not a thing.
Like you would go to a water fountain and you would drink like you would drink and drink and drink because you were so thirsty. You didn't realize no water bottles.
No. You didn't have like maybe at a soccer game they would have water maybe but it was like or like Gatorade or Powerade which is poison.
Never checked. Never said did you drink water? They never brought water.
There was never, now I'm obsessed with water. Yes.
Do you have one of those things, those jugs that says the time of day? I did have that, but, and it was positive reinforcement. Like you're doing it.
You're doing great. You're almost there or whatever.
But now I, Molly Shannon had one of those on the side of, I love that for you. And you know, she was always like, isn't it great? Isn't it great? It reminds me.
I love it. She was like, isn't it great? You drink water too? I love water.
I love water. Think about how great it was.
There's something that's just so great about it. You know what I mean? You know what I'm saying? No, I have a basic bitch, like white girl, Stanley, that I love.
Because I like to sip it like a gerbil. Like I like the straw.
And I like to be like. This is the second episode in a row that gerbils have come up.
There's something in the culture about gerbils. Guinea pigs.
Rodents at large are having a moment. That's what I'm saying.
When I was growing up there was not water on the table. I'll tell you what there was.
A Coke, a Diet Coke and a Sprite. Two liters each.
Don't forget about milk, babe. I was just going to say, we shared this thing.
We came up when milk was king. You would chug our glass.
You were not getting osteoporosis, that's for sure. You would chug a glass of milk.
At least. Once a day.
They said two. There was a time they were saying two.
It was like Cindy Crawford on the cover of whatever the fuck with her got milk mustache being like, if it's not two, you're going to die of osteoporosis. And one of the things I remember my Nana saying to me when I was little was she looked me in the eye and said, osteoporosis is not fun.
And I'm like, and now I'm scared. And where is that in the culture now? Have we just forgotten about osteoporosis? Not only have we not forgotten about it, but as a woman of that age, all my friends are getting bone density tests.
Girl. Dexascans.
And everything is coming home to roost. Because a couple of things, you get, I didn't know this, you get all your calcium before the age of 30, number one.
Number two, if you are fair skin like myself, you don't get enough sun, you don't get enough vitamin D, vitamin D, you should be taking it. You're pretty screwed.
Yeah. You guys might be okay with us.
I don't know. But, and also there's these things in LA that I'm obsessed with that I want to go to, which are like, they're like salons for people who have osteopenia, which is pre-osteoporosis, where you just, you know, you have to do heavy lifting now.
Like now I have to lift weights. So you have to do a lot of weight.
Keep your bone density together. Yes.
And so you have to take your calcium and you have to do weights. And so there's like programs where it's like, you do leg presses, you do whatever.
And it's just designed for women my age who are smart enough to get their bone density tests. And they're like, I have a little bit of, you know, osteopenia in my hips.
I need to do leg presses. Wow.
So I know a lot about osteoporosis. There are penia clubs? There's penia and osis.
Penia and porosis. So one is pre, one is you got it.
Yeah. And there's things you can do, but you kind of like, you know, where our bones stop growing at like 18.
Yeah. When I started working out like more seriously a few months ago, my trainer literally said, it's great that you start now because at 35, your bone density is completely gone.
And then by 37, you lose any metabolism you ever had. And I was just like going cross-eyed like, oh no.
It is wild that as a woman, you go through being like a sex object and then maybe a mother and then maybe like menopause. And then they're like, and on your way out, you need to eat 45 grams of protein a day and lift very heavy weights or all your bones will break.
If you don't turn into a monster now. It's like you got, and you're like, what? You're like, this can't be true.
I can't, I have to go to the gym and lift the heaviest I've ever lifted. Hey, what if we shuffled the order? What if you started off low bone density? Yeah.
Then you become a sex, or no, I think it'd be fun to end on sex object. That would be incredible.
That would be incredible. I mean, things are changing, but you know, can you do, I'm sure you can do pushups, right? So they say women need to be able to do like 10 or 11 pushups, real pushups a day.
And you got, just like, okay. Well, I'll try.
It's hard. Are you saying these are clubs specifically for osteopenic women? Yeah.
They're like physical therapy places. That sounds like heaven.
I agree because my age, I'm the youngest, oldest person. I see.
And that, you like that? I think 30s and 40s, yes. Okay.
30s and 40s are a little tricky because you're like, I'm not as young as I used to be, but I don't feel old. And nobody, like old people dismiss you.
They're like, you're 30, whatever. Like, you know, but when you're in your 50s, you're not young, right? And young people do not think you're young.
No way. 50 is like a nightmare to them that wakes them up in the middle of the night.
But you feel young and old people are like, so you're the youngest, oldest person. I gotta say, and please, please shut me up if this sounds patronizing in any way.
I feel like this current crop of 50-somethings is still aspirational to me. Oh, agree.
I would rather be living your life honest to god i would

rather be going to bloomingdales and museums and things every day on tour than the bullshit that 30 30 year olds we just did that we had that when we were we were in berlin we went to berghain and we were there we got we went like saturday at 2 a.m thinking there was going to be a line No.

We soared in there.

Like, had a time.

We were there for-

Talking about how with friends,

acquaintances we have have been in that club for 48 hours. Yeah, we know people that have been there for days.
We'll be like, let's see how long we last. We left after hour four.
It was maybe five or six. And it wasn't because it was just like not, it was great.
We were the best time. But we were like, oh, you know what? We'll go home.
We'll catch some Z's. We'll come back later.
I text Bowen. I'm like, can I say something? What if we didn't go back? And then we walked to a museum and walked back because we realized we had to pay.
So what did we do that afternoon? We walked to the museum and walked back. Didn't even go into the museum.
We had a burger. I'm here to tell you that if you enjoy that now, the future is very bright.

Oh, I'm happy.

Because best decade yet for me,

50s by far best decade, way better.

And also I have to say to your point, Bowen,

like women my age or the age in our 50s,

it used to be kind of like maiden mother crone.

Those were the maiden mother crone, right?

And now I think that we've managed to carve out

Thank you. mother crone.
Those were the, those were the maiden mother crone. Right.
And, and now I think that we've managed to carve out, um, our generation, my generation has carved out a step before

crone and it's kind of like, I'm calling it like boss or something, but at some stage before you

become like the wise witch, where you are allowed to actually like, you know, enjoy the fruits of your labor. Yeah.
Not be so beholden to like external validation and you still like feel good. I think it's just a full supplanting of Crone.
like well there is I kind what crone means yes is like wisdom and um you know like medicine woman but it's a tough word crone is it's a tough word it's a tough word but it's a word that i associate with sex in the city because there's the theory that they each represent the four crones and like classical i didn't know there were classical crones there. There's like the four crones.
And they were like- Is it Shakespeare's crone? No. Oh yeah, it might be Shakespeare's crones.
Maybe it's Shakespeare's crones. They're like- Yeah.
Shakespeare's crones disease women. No one knew.
No one knew. They didn't have the words for it back then, Amy.
He was always bloated and shitting his brains out. Yeah, we should rename crone.
We should call it like- Slayer. Like a medicine woman or something.
Medicine woman. Diva.
Diva. Wait, diva is this extra step that you're talking about.
Okay, yeah. It's literally diva.
Yes. Yeah.
I'm wondering something about you two though, about like you being like, can't wait to get to Bloomingdale's. But you guys also like share the fact that for a long time, you guys did entertainment's most difficult job.
So did you feel like that like socially also was like after that, on the other side of that, you were like, okay, you also had the kids. But I didn't have kids when I was at SNL.
And I cannot believe the way I socialize. Like SNL is such crazy extroverted social job.
You see hundreds of people like during the week and then you have to do the show and then you have to host the host. Yeah, you're hosting the host.
Exactly. Then you have to go to the party, which I know is like, oh, go to a party, but it is still a work function, even as fun as it is.
And I cannot believe, like it is so much energy that I can't believe I did it. it I really and I'm glad that I was younger when I did it I'll just never forget because I told you this when we first met but I was there I was a standby kid so I would wait on the standby lines and I would go and then I'll never forget I believe it was the episode um that Anne Hathaway hosted with the killers which we talked to Seth about this episode.
And that was the very first Lawrence Welk show. And then a couple of weeks later on the weekend update Thursday, you did the Palin rap, like nine months pregnant.
Right. And I have never forgotten how Herculean that was of you doing that.
Like that has to feel like a highlight of doing that show. Yeah.
Like with carrying your child almost to full term, like barking out that song next to this figure in culture. Like, and I'll just, that was, it felt like a lightning bolt had hit this, the studio at that moment.
Thank you. That was really fun.
Really fun. It had to be.
And very exciting and very exciting and just kind of felt yeah it felt like there was a feeling during that whole time remember when we thought that was a crazy election but um but like there was a feeling that whole time of just the audience was really paying attention everything was and when you're really pregnant giant pregnant you have a ton of power because people are a little worried for you, but you also, you know. And so we had a lot of fun with it.
Like me and Emily Spivey, we wrote a scene about me knocking things over. Emily was also pregnant during that time too.
And there was just this feeling, you know, it's kind of like Chekhov's gun. Like, is she going to give birth? Like- Wait, was it it the episode was it Josh Brolin that hosted where it was just you moving over to him in a bar it was just Amy pregnant as fuck I remember that yes and he was really into me yeah he's so sweet here comes little lady that was the same episode that was the Josh Brolin episode and Sarah Palin just came on update and she was a really good sport and she she was like, okay, sure.
I'll just dance next to you. And I remember thinking, I wonder if her team has really told her what this is, but that's okay.
We're going to do it. We're going to, and I think my pregnancy helped.
Like it was like, how do you, how can you say no to the lady? Right. And it was so, it was thrilling in the moment.
It was really fun. Yeah.
It was really fun. And then I gave birth like, let's see, maybe like four or five days later.
Yes, I remember. He said that on update.
He was like, Amy's not here because she's having a baby. And that was the first Jon Hamm episode.
Yes. Full circle.
That's right. He was just at the show.
And Hamm was the host. I mean, the millionth craziest thing about that episode, which was the Josh Brolin one, is that the musical guest was Adele.
Fully Adele. Like pre- Adele.
Oh, like Chasing Pavement? Chasing Pavement. Yes.
And then I remember she won Best New Artist a couple months later and I was like, well, yeah, probably because everyone in the world was watching that episode. And they were like, who the hell is she? She's incredible.
That was a night of culture. And you were at that show.
I was. I went to all of them.
I was addicted. And again, I told you this, but it was the very first time I had ever gotten in.
And I was like, there was this feeling like, I don't know that it's this that I have to do, but I have to do something like this. And I was very lost.
So I went back to my dorm room and sat on my bed and like tearfully, because I wanted so bad like Googled you because you were the person I respected the most and then I saw that you had started UCB and that you were in your improv group at your school so I was like in my head I was like I'm definitely auditioning for the improv group and the sketch group which is ultimately what I got in and um started doing UCB and it was because I googled your name that night because of me going to those shows. Oh my God, so nice.
Thank you for saying that. I mean, you have to know the impact that you've had on a generation of people, obviously because it's true, but also like it's just such a very real thing, especially I think on gay men.
Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. Oh, you must understand this.
Well, thank you for saying that. I sometimes feel like I have more gay women that I get that feedback from, which I appreciate, but that's nice of you to say gay men.
The men, I think, just, I don't know. The men respond to this thing where like you are just being like your full powerful self on TV and that is something that like we kind of have to like go about sideways in media sometimes and we will eat our own sometimes and so like it's, I feel like you do figure very, very largely in that sense.
Wow. That means a lot.
That's a high compliment. I mean, I feel like for me, the biggest thing that culturally that I get a lot of feedback from, especially from gay men is Mean Girls.
Oh, absolutely. That feels like, especially for the millennials, felt like their version of how to interact with me more i think than snl and parks i don't know but yeah i was i was gonna bring i was gonna bring up stronson fairchild oh for blades of glory you're right there are there are certain press interviews that you guys did for that, but I watched a million times.

That was really fun.

Those were like when movies,

like when they were,

it was just like money,

money,

money,

money,

movies,

movies,

movies.

I know.

And here's a fun story about that.

Will and Arnett and I played brother and sister,

but we were actually married in real life.

And we,

um,

they tested that movie and the testing,

they were like,

we hate strands and fair child.

What do you mean?

The villain.

Right.

And I remember the,

the info coming back,

like,

Thank you. movie and the testing they were like we hate strons and fair child what do you mean they're the villain right and i remember that the info coming back like a lot of people don't really like the and we were like well we're the villains you know but but to the director's credit they i think they kept a lot of it in but that was really but yeah we did tons of auto shoots and yeah that was really big.
DDT extras. Yeah.

Oh! Odo Schutzen. Yeah, that was really big.
DDT extras. Yeah.
Oh, tasty high note. Oh, hi, don't mind me.
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Limitations, terms, and conditions apply. At that point, we had already been like used to a Will Ferrell big comedy movie.
And John Heater, obviously huge, like big moment for him. But I was just so tickled as like a comedy person watching SNL every week, as someone who was like scrolling like the writing credits for The Simpsons.
Like we were like those kids. Like it was just thrilling to see you and Will in a film like that.
And I will always, always remember just you as Marilyn and him as JFK. Also, also first of all, I was walking in today.
I was like, who am I dressed like? And I was like, i'm dressed like will in night of the roxbury oh my god yeah kind of have like a hang homage to our producer will yes i have i have yes i'm paying homage funny story about that movie we had to learn how to ice skate right and i knew enough to know i'm not going to be doing a ton of ice skating this movie you know they, they had incredible body doubles and face switcheroo. Yeah.
A technology. And they had really good ice skaters having to do that.
And I knew I was like, I think if I could just fake it in the waist up, I'll be fine. You went like this at one point.
I was just like the fact that it was so green screen. I loved it.
I was up here. But they had an incredible professional like ex Olympian ice dancer, coach, performer, coaching me again.
It was a time when movies were like you're going to have to, we're going to, and I was on SNL. And so on the weekends and in the mornings, I would have to go to Chelsea Piers and ice skate.
And I remember she was this really, I'm sorry, I forget her name. If you're listening, you were awesome.
But I would do that thing that I learned early when I wanted someone to not do something where I would just, she would sit, we'd have our coffee in the morning. I knew we only had an hour.
The clock would be behind her. And I'd be like, wait, what's going on with you? And she'd go, well, we have to get out on the ice.
And I'd go, I know, I know, I know. We have to train.
I'd be like, but how is your daughter? And I would try to get her to talk and the clock would just tick away. And I'd be like, geez, because I, it was so hard to learn.
Because you were bone tired between shows. Bone tired.
And also, I knew it. I knew I didn't have to know it that well.
Exactly. You're like, it's going to be this.
It's going to be this. It's going to be waist up.
We're going to be on wires. It's going to be Marilyn with the pills.
And I'm never going to get it. Yeah.
And at one point, she said to me, you know, if at any point something's hurting, make sure you tell me to stop. We were like practicing.
You were like, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Well, I was like, I will.
Yeah. I was like, I am not an athlete.
Like, I'm not going to play through the pain. Yeah, no.
I am not trying to get a medal here. No, no, no, no.
So I can kind of icecape, but not that well. Did you do sports in high school? I was.
I was like, did a bunch of sports moderately well. Uh-huh.
Like, good trash talker., played softball, played soccer, like a little basketball. Like just kind of was like, like the mouth.
But it wasn't particularly good. Because team captain energy is something that I would, I would ascribe to you.
Thank you. I was really good at keeping the team up.
There you go. And really good at like knowing where the play is.
Like a lot of like plays a second, you know, like that. But not, didn't really have the skill.
Small, didn't really have an arm. You're talking about softball? Yes.
And it's amazing that I'm not gay because every picture of me during that time. Looks kind of gay.
The cutest, like baby lesbian. But we all did back then.
We all did in many ways. Right.
But like not a jock. Yeah.
Right. And then she was a cheerleader sometimes too.
Right. Just kind of a floater to use a mean girl's term.
No, that's great because I feel like there's something about young people now where they are struggling with finding people, just socializing in general. It's a good thing.
It's like what you want to tell them is like, oh, is it like an osteoporosis thing? Like it's like a calcium thing. You have to start early and like get the whole sportsman thing going.
I think to learn how to collaborate in any way, I think it's important to be, not to do sports, but to be involved in activities like that. I just think, I don't know, it was a different time where you could be okay at softball and play in your local softball league for a long time.
But now you have to be like on a traveling team and it's very intense. Oh yeah.
And parents are involved. Parents have ruined a lot of things.
Like when parents show up, they kind of ruin things. And my generation, my parents, no one went to anyone's, like occasionally went to a game, but there were like, adults taking things over.
Everything was a little less stressful. You could try a bunch of things, and it wasn't necessarily your identity.
Right. I imagine you have not been Dom parent in that context with your kids.
I feel like I'm trying not to be. I feel like- You're not showing up to the things that, in a way that is, kind of, all right.
Some people, it's their identity, right? Like they're living through their kids, I guess. But, which I mean, you have to be supportive.
How old are your kids now? They're 14 and 16. Okay, those are, yeah, you got teen boys.
Yeah, I love teens. You breaking towels in half? I love teens.
I'm here to say it. Stop.
Gross. Don't tell me that I'm gross.
Those boys are gross. Stop it.
I love teens. I know what they do.
I love teens. I'm here to say the teen years have my favorite years.
Are they? Is it because they're kind of like riding hard for you right now? They're just like interesting people. And also their friends are kind of interesting.
And you're like, this is like the black diamond of parenting. This is where it's coming in and you're having big conversations.
They're making choices. You're trying to keep them safe.
It's people like focus on the little, the youngins, like the baby stuff and the youngins. But I don't know.
There's something. I think I'm good with teens.
Yeah. It's black Diamond.
It's moguls, moguls, moguls, moguls. Got to either right on top or right around.
Is this tied to, because I've always thought of you as this aspirational TikTok person because I'm like, well, I need to get on TikTok because I feel like there are people out there like Amy Poehl who are like,'s cool. I like it there.
But I feel like you were on TikTok almost first when you were lip syncing and then you came in, you dominated and then you like left. Yeah, but you know what? That wasn't TikTok.
We were so ahead of the curve on Instagram. That was Instagram? We had so many viral things.
Pre-TikTok things that would have taken off on TikTok. Now I know that's, this sounds so cloying and obnoxious, but it's true.
Like Matt and I would like start like song, like. Oh yeah, we had tunes.
Yeah. We would start like TikTok songs, bare people, if you know what we're talking about.
If you know you know. You know.
Four Nights in Orlando, which was our American horror story. But every episode was 15 seconds long.
Every episode was 15 seconds long in Orlando. We would go, we would be on about a metric ton of edibles and we would- And shoot like horror anthologies at Disney World.
Oh my God. It's out there.
That's amazing. It is out there.
If you go deep in the Instagrams, they are there. But we were- What was the horror anthology called? Four Nights in Orlando.
And then it was like, it was like Four Nights in hotel, four nights in Orlando, gay ghost, four nights in Orlando, which war, which war was our best. We always say that was the most satisfying one when you watched it all together.
And also you could see so many. And you can't find that.
You can't put that back out on TikTok. No, I tried and it didn't really, you know, less culture is huge on TikTok.
Right. But that's, we do pretty good.
That's our lovely social team. I feel like we could put it back on TikTok, but there would just be that 2014 patina on it where you'd be like, ew, I don't want to watch anything from that time.
I feel like more and more, I mean, even starting this podcast is a good example of that. I'm getting a little less worried about whether or not my timing is right.
It's okay. Yeah.
Oh yeah, no, you can't worry about that. So I feel like if you want to do it, I feel like you can do whatever you want.
That's what TikTok's all about. If you don't want to do it, certainly don't.
Right, right. You can do whatever you want.
Anytime you want. It seems fun.
Yeah, it should only be fun. It is fun.
And there was a time when I was even doing like the challenges. Yeah.
Like I just looked through it and it was, it's just like me. One time I did a totally earnest TikTok to Taylor Swift song, Paris.
It was earnest. It was, it was so, it was, I deleted it because I, the cringe.
We're post cringe. Well, we've climbed Cringe Mountain.
Have you heard about this? It's so major. Once you climb Cringe Mountain, then you get to the other side and you're in Nirvana.
Oh yeah. I mean, that's where the power lies is post-cringe.
I mean, you learn that with comedy a lot. You know, you have to just, you can't be embarrassed.
Right. Do you have the moment in your career that you're like this, I climbed Cringe Mountain at this point? Yeah.
Cringe Mountain is far behind me. Yeah.
I don't worry about that at all. Because basically you survive a ton of embarrassments, like death by a thousand cuts.
You just realize I'm okay. It's okay.
And then you realize that like, actually the longer in your career, you should be taking more risks and trying new things. And you should be like a little nervous and a little excited.
And the minute you are afraid about being cool, you're screwed. You're totally screwed.
It's so true. And it stops you doing things.
It does. And everyone is so obsessed with themselves.
I would so much rather somebody be a little tenderoni and make a cringey mistake than the opposite. When people are really cool, I'm like, oh, honey.
Like when they're trying to be very cool, I get so stressed for them. I know, I know.
It's not easy. It's not easy out there.
Right. But it's the same way with like hosts at SNL.
like a host that will come in and we'll be like kind of open face sandwich. You'd be like, I'm nervous or whatever.
Like I'm going to try. And they give your sketch their all.
And you're like, I love you forever. Yes.
But when someone is trying to be cool, you're like, hmm. I can think of the people.
And the coolness, you know, it's so, it's a protective shell. So you kind of feel for them.
We've all been there, but it is, it's so fleeting. Like what is, what is cool? Right.
It's not defined. It isn't.
It actually never was. I mean, you guys do kind of define it.
Oh, you do. Amy.
Guys, you do kind of define it. And why, I'm going to say this, the reason why you define it is because your list is about not being cool.
Right. But it is the coolest list in the world.
It takes the piss out of the list in the first place. And it reminds you that like, we're all like, we're all like dumb humans.
We're dumb. Do you want to know what it was? I think for me in high school, I don't know about you.
Did you guys have friends that made fun of you constantly in high school? Like I allowed myself to be the butt of the joke a lot. They made fun of me for the way I held a fork.
They made fun of me for the way I wore a hat. They made fun of me because I couldn't see colors.
Like I was constantly getting ribbed on by my friends. And I think it made me realize like, well, I'm not cool and shouldn't try.
And then years later, someone, I remember someone said, yeah, you're a cool person. Like people think that.
And I was just like, I don't, I don't think, and don't tell me that because that will get me in my head. I think the key is just like always being surrounded by people who are a little bit like this.
Yeah. I do that all the time, Matt.
You need people to rib you. Well, I think it's a very East coast thing too.
I would agree. It's a very East Coast thing.
Like the more I like you, the more I'll tease you. Yes.
It's like, it is like a safety thing. I mean, within a reason, like you don't want to be bullied.
No, don't hurt my feeling. Manners are for people we don't know.
Okay. Yes.
You know what? That was actually an unspoken thing. Especially with my, my first ever like ensemble I ever felt like I was a part of was my like friend group in high school yeah and our thing was we always took the rip the shit out of yeah there's there's nothing more satisfying than when you can tease someone with love yeah and they tease you back and you're like oh we're saying like we're this is intimacy is that how you and your friends are like yes that was boston all the way yeah yeah yeah and then through.
And then through SNL as well? Yes. Like hard, like, because when you tease someone the right way, it also means that you see them.
Yeah. Like you feel seen.
Right. Like the most delightful thing when someone can like, you know, you know, you're like talking about someone, you're like, I'm so tired.
And someone's like, you are? We couldn't tell, you know, You're like, ah! Like, you just feel so, like, delighted. He knows I'm tired all the time.
But are you downloading this into the boys at all? I'm trying to, like, I think, I'm trying to just kind of, but, you know, here's the thing about teens. They don't want to be told.
No downloading. No downloading.
You go from producer to consultant. Oh.
And that is not my line. That is someone else's line.
Someone else said that. But you go from handling your kid's life over like and scheduling their play dates and getting their stuff and get it like and making their lunch.
All this stuff. It's like you're in charge to being like, I know you didn't ask me, but what I would do is you have to just stand back.
You can't, you almost can't tell them anything.

Yeah, right, right.

Just think about it when your parents would say something at that age,

it would just be like, shut up.

So you, you, you do the, I don't know.

There's a really good technique.

I'm super into it.

It works for people too.

But where you just repeat back to them what they said to you.

So I hate my, I hate my teacher.

You hate your teacher.

Yeah, because she doesn't listen to us and she's always like giving us assignments. We don't like, she's always giving you assignments, you know, like, yeah, you just don't say.
And it kind of keeps pulling the thread until it loosens and loosens and loosens. And they talk to you and they're not looking for you to fix it and certainly not to give advice.

No.

Barf.

Like, you know, what you should do

or, you know, teachers are really like,

they're working really hard these days

or whatever.

They just want to say it to you.

Even adults don't want to be told.

Agree.

I did it for a year.

I was trying a thing

where I would only give advice

to people that asked for it.

And no one ever asked.

You know what's funny?

I'm almost never asking for it.

And I still have friends.

There are certain friends

and I feel like it's conversations I have to have

where it's like, I haven't realized

it will be really easy to change a dynamic in our friendship

if I just tell them, I don't need advice.

I think I have a therapist for that like yeah I don't need um prescription yeah you know what I mean it's like when people give me prescription it it's it's I'm not good anymore at maybe at a certain point I was when I felt like you were all like in our 20s or something figuring it out but it's, I do sometimes just need to externalize my feelings.

Because maybe it's because I've realized

how well therapy works.

Because what you're talking about is therapy technique.

All your therapist does is facilitate you

speaking to yourself.

And then you hear it and you're like,

oh, I've heard it out loud finally.

It's Brene Brown, walk alongside.

Not like face the person and say,

this is what you should do.

It's like, they just want to be told that meme of, hey, I'm not reading all that. I'm so happy for you.
Or I'm sorry that happened. It's like, they just want to be told, great.
Or I'm so sorry. And the other side of that is, I'm really egotistical about my advice.
I think I have great advice. So I not only don't want advice that I don't ask for, but I like to offer advice that nobody asked for.
And then I get a little butthurt when they don't take it. I'm like, you didn't take my advice? Like that's solid gold advice.
And then my therapist was like, why are you giving advice to people that don't ask for it? That's precious advice that you can't just give out

willy-nilly right like be respectful of your own advice yeah and value it you can value it you can even say like are you open to advice and if they say yes you go you know if i give it do you think you'll this advice means something to me would it mean something it's like a lot can we can we ask Do you have any advice for us?

Yeah, give us advice.

My God, I have such little advice for you. No, come on, tell us.
Okay, in what area? Can you ask something specifically about, just life advice? Yeah, I want like all of these things at SNL that I feel like are not compatible in terms of like lifestyle things of like dating and like having a dog and like all of these things. Yes.
Maybe the advice is, the advice is it's just, just wait it out until, until you finish one thing. Also, you're so ahead of the game by realizing it's something that you want.
Oh. Like I think just even knowing what you want, you're ahead of the game.
Life is an arrow pointing you to what you want. So like by not getting it, you're like, oh, I'm really missing that.
I want that. That's interesting.
That's, oh, thank you, SNL, for pointing the arrow to what I want. And I think my advice would be try to imagine that it's not binary.
It's not like you either have it or you don't. You can't have it there.
You can't. The can'ts and shouldn't and maybe nots.
There's a lot of space in between that not being a place where you could have it and a place where you could have it. I'm receiving that.
Thank you. Mine's really specific.
I need like a moving company. Oh, I have a great one.
Um, I need like some people to,

I love some stuff up.

Very good.

So my advice there would be,

don't lift a finger.

I won't.

You have,

you have,

we have a,

you have a,

you're doing well.

You have enough money,

you know,

thank God.

Very lucky.

Take your privilege and get,

we ran through my bank account before we started.

She knows all my financial stuff. We, I made sure.
Get somebody to pack everything up for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But do one pass and go through and grab anything, a document, anything that you would sob over if it was lost. Yeah.
I mean, sob. Not like, I love this chair.
I love this vase, whatever. Like go through and go, if this got thrown in the ocean by accident,

would it ruin my life?

Right.

Get those things out.

Everything else, let them pack it for you.

Wow.

You know, what's crazy is I'm realizing

that stuff is less and less and less.

Stuff means less to me.

Now, even like sentimental things,

which I felt like,

oh, shouldn't they mean more to me over time?

I think as I get older,

I realized just things are things. It's bizarre.
Like we were doing, playing this game at Coachella the night before the festival. We were doing like the newlywed game with each other.
And one of the questions was, it was for me to answer, what would he grab if he had to grab one thing, if the house was like, you know, it was an earthquake on fire,

whatever is a disaster.

And I sat there

and couldn't think of one thing.

For yourself.

And then everyone was like,

my dog, Bill,

my partner, David.

And I was like,

oh, I guess it's just because

I don't have any of those like real things.

I was like,

and I wrote down a lot of phone chargers.

I just would grab all the chargers

because you never can have enough.

Right. That's good.
You might not be attached to things. That's very healthy.
Maybe I'm not. I don't know.
I think that is changing about. That's good.
That's very good. There's a thing called Swedish death cleaning.
I produced a show about it, which is all about that. Swedish death cleaning.
The gentle art of Swedish death cleaning, which is the Swedes believe one of the things that you can do for your family is you can clear out your stuff before you die. Like, you know, they want less stuff.
And why not give your stuff away while you're still vital and alive and tell people why it means something to you so they can get to know you. Because what happens in the States is people die, they leave all the stuff.
Then you go through your like grandfather's papers and you're like, he was, you know, he played the tuba. Like I didn't even know or whatever.
And so let people know you while you're alive, but it's all about minimizing and getting rid of stuff. And so maybe you're just kind of doing that along the way.
Yeah. Is your brother still there? Yeah.
He lives in Sweden. Oh, so cool.
There was a, there was a smart girls thing where he was just playing basketball and I was like, that seems like a cool dude. Yeah.
My brother is the coolest. He's a really funny writer and performer.
And he moved to Sweden. He met a woman who lived in Sweden.
They got married, they had a kid. And now he's been there, God must be almost 20 years.
He's like a full expat. He lives outside of Stockholm and like speaks Swedish.
You know, it's so cool. I'm really trying to find a husband with another passport.
Oh yeah. Like I do think it's time.
It's time. Like, and weirdly enough, like this is a pattern.
I've been going out with a lot of guys that like weirdly are also from another country and are sober. Ooh, I like that for you.
That's really good for you. I like that for you.
I'm not even trying to date like sober guys and I'm not trying to date guys with like dual citizenship, but like What, what, what country would you like to, let's just put it out there. I mean, I guess like Canada or England.
Okay. Okay.
There are people. There are people.
There are people out there. Listen, I'm talking specifically to people that live in Toronto and London, I suppose.
I just, but we were in London and it was so great. Right.
But be careful with that London weather. That's all I got to say.
That London weather is like Sweden. It is dark.
It is a dark, cold country. So just be aware.
I do well with overcast. You know what I mean? Like it's, I don't really.
You're right. You're not a sun boy.
I'm definitely a sun boy, but like I've had enough of it. It's like I grew up on Long Island and I'm like a child of the beach and the sun.
And so now I'm kind of like, maybe I've had enough like for my life. I love a UK guy for you.
I think so. With a scarf and everything.
I don't know about the scarf. You don't like the scarf? I could do a scarf, I suppose.
You're good with the scarf. Like a scarf and like an overcoat? Overcoat, certainly.
See, when you said scarf, my mind went to Ascot and I do see- Oh, no, no. Can I say, I do see some people out there trying to bring back the Ascot and I'm not ready for that.
That's okay. That's fun.
Like a winter, like a Jude Law winter look. Like a, what's the guy's name? I love a winter look.
You know, the guy that did all the movies, like a Richard Curtis coming in from the cold.

We met at the Oscars.

We did meet Richard Curtis. Richard Curtis at the Oscars.

Oh, that was special.

Just a gentleman like shaking off the snow.

Yes.

Off his overcoat.

Yes.

Oh, that's good.

Okay.

Now I'm like upset that it's going to be spring and summer

because my favorite time to date is the fall and the winter.

Because it's cuffing season.

Yes.

But like I never cuff.

My thing is like, I just like to be dressed up for a date and also maybe it's like you're less self-conscious of what your body is doing. This is the dysmorphic part.
What I project upon you that I want for you is a gentleman who's maybe a little sober or whatever just like not, he's just like he's not the not the main character. Okay.
He's the one that's like, he's just like, look at him go. I do think I do need that.
Do you subscribe to flower gardener sort of duality in relationships? Say more. Like one person is the flower, they need to be watered and gardened and one person is a gardener and they kind of, that's what they do.
It can't be as simple as that, but that is a dichotomy thing that people sometimes think about.

I think that's interesting

because I would say for you,

you're an extroverted person, right?

Probably secretly more introverted than we think.

Yeah, but an extroverted person

who I think it would be nice for you

to have like a British Jude Law looking gentleman who has the taxi waiting while you work the room. Has the taxi.
Yeah. Taxi waiting.
I love someone that wants to leave. He's like ready to go love.
Yeah. Like I'm ready to go.
Ready to go. Oh, that rocks.
Yes. There's actually nothing less sexy than someone who doesn't know when to leave a party.

Oh, yeah.

It's a problem.

When someone can't leave a party

because they're just kind of waiting

for this thing that hasn't happened yet to happen.

Yeah.

Absolutely not.

Absolutely.

And it won't happen.

It won't happen.

And also, I'm the part.

Like, I'm the part.

Yeah, hello.

Like, what are you waiting for?

Exactly.

I'm the party.

I'm the party.

I'm the party. I'm the party.
I'm the party. Oh, tasty high note.
Oh, hi. Don't mind me.
I'm practicing my new baritone sax. I just heard PayPal's paying for people's stuff.
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Get 15% off your first order today. We have to ask the question.
So this is the question that we ask all of our guests. Amy Fuller, this is what was the culture that made you say culture was for you? Okay, well, you know, you are my favorite podcast, so I've thought about this a lot.
I love this podcast. I love this podcast and I thought about it a lot and you know, I didn't want to overthink it, but I have to say for me growing up, there was a woman who I just related to.
She just felt very strong. She had a really specific POV.
She kind of asked for what she wanted. She always had good jokes.
And that woman was Miss Piggy. You know that she might be coming on Lost Colts.
She might be a guest on this very podcast. We are obsessed.
She's one of the top icons. She, at a time when women were told to be seen and not heard, she took up space.
She was very body positive. She was, yes, at times a little violent.
We would, we'd maybe correct that now. There was some, there was almost always in self-defense.
I completely agree. She often saved the day.
She often saved the day. She said what she wanted.
She was like one big intrusive thought. And if you suffered from those, like I did as a kid, you were like, I can't believe she said that out loud.
She was always funny. She had really good jokes.
Yeah, she did. Kermie loved her.
Obsessed. She was the only person in a Muppet Christmas Carol who stood up to Scrooge.
You'll be leaving. What? I won't.
I won't. Whenever she goes, oh my God.
It is the pinnacle of comedy. Respectful of martial arts culture.
Respect respectful of Eastern culture. Okay.
If you say so. I mean, I don't know.
I don't know. Okay.
I'm happy. Don't worry.
You can enjoy Miss Piggy's. Yes.
It's done respectfully. And she was, she was such a funny character.
Yeah. Hilarious.
I mean, she was an outsized diva who demanded that she get her shine. Yes.
And what was always great was the budget they would blow out for her sets and everything and how disastrously it would go wrong. But yet it's still, she still came out on top.
Oh, yeah. And they never, she was allowed to like, I guess like keep failing.
She was a woman in Hollywood that they let keep flopping look it was the 70s right it wasn't perfect so at times miss piggy like almost felt like oh she's a cautionary tale of someone who's too but the audience did not feel that from her no the muppet show when it would come on and the it's time to get things started and the song would start as a kid i was like this is hollywood everything this felt like this was you know i didn't know anyone that was an actor or writer i'd never seen anyone famous something about the muppet show was like there is a place where my jokes and what i like is gonna live and it was get ready for the show it's like very snl was it your pre-snl snl it your pre-SNL SNL? It was my pre-SNL. Yeah.
Because my generation of SNL, the people I like, I was like 10 when Eddie Murphy joined SNL and I was like 14 when it was like Dana Carvey and Jan Hooks and Phil Hartman. So that was, but the Muppet Show was the first feeling of there's a show about to be put on.
Yes, yes, yes. And Miss Piggy was the star of the Muppet Show.
Yes, she was. She was the star.
She was the, she told everyone what to do. And Kermie couldn't resist.
No. I mean, he was a little shy.
And, you know, she kind of probably spoke for him in a way that I think he liked. Well, thank you for putting some shine on Kermit too, because Kermie, I think was also just as valuable of a male, a masculinity comp that as Miss Piggy was a femininity sort of example.
Yeah, they flipped. He was kind of a soft boy.
Also though, during that time, we also had people like Alan Alda and Mash, right?

Who was like so nice.

Even though he was so sweet.

We had some sweetie pies.

It wasn't as masculine all the time as people think.

Like the seventies, there was some like groovy,

like, you know, dads or even like Michael Landon,

who was like tough, but like loved his daughter

and was kind of sweet.

But Kermit was very in touch with his feminine side. Yes.
It sounds like you have feelings for Kermit. You know why I love Kermit? Kermit was a peacemaker.
Yes. Kermit was a peacemaker.
And as I get older, I'm drawn to people, men especially, who are looking for peace. Oh, yeah.
All I want to do is feel calm.

Me too.

I want to feel calm.

I want to feel safe.

And I don't.

Conflict used to be the way.

I'm an Enneagram 8.

Do you care about your Enneagram?

Oh, I'm a 7.

That's right.

You're a 7.

That makes sense.

What are you?

A 4.

A 4?

Yeah.

Bowen.

Oh, that's so hard.

What are you thinking?

No one understands you.

You're very.

It's very hard to.

No, 4s are like. They're like special romantic.
Yeah, fours are dream maker. Like that makes artists.
Remind me eight. Challenger.
Yeah. So I used to think conflict was how I, and it was often how I got intimate with people.
Like, and now I want more peace. I see.
And sevens are so much fun. You know, we exhaust ourselves.
Yeah. Sevens are.
And require a lot. But they're so fun.
Yeah. I mean, I like, it's so funny because I, and then I looked at the results and it was like, whoa, I didn't stand a chance.
I was such a seven. Like it was, it was, I was thinking like, oh, I don't know.
These answers aren't going to all go together. It was like, you're a seven down.
The house down. Yes.
And I mean, I get that. It's funny.
Like as I get a little bit older, like I'm also, I don't know if you ascribe to the astrology of it all, but I'm also like a triple water sign, double Pisces cancer moon, which is like that. And a seven is like, Oh, he going to take up a lot of space.
And, and also you're just going to be kind of like, what's the next thing? Like you're definitely for the adventure.

I'm also a consumer.

Suti used to say that about me all the time.

You like beautiful things.

And sometimes that can get me in.

I have a lot of sevens in my life.

I love them.

For those that you don't care about Enneagrams, whatever.

But they're enthusiasts.

They're enthusiasts.

Yes.

They love things and they love having fun.

But a seven's always like,

you're like, let's go do this thing.

And they're like, is it going to be fun? And you're like, I mean, I guess. Fun.
Fun is important. Newness is important.
It's interesting to be the kind of person that's like seeks excitement and seeks like to consume things and have experiences, but then also have like an anxiety creep up. Yeah.
Because it's like, that's when you get in your head with a lot of like judgment, judgment, judgment. I just, that's why I want to be calm.
It's because I just want someone who's just going to be like, it's okay. Like, you know what I mean? Like it's, it's, you know what? Like this experience is going to be what it is.
And then it's going to be over. And then we're going to have another one tomorrow.
Yeah. But I am sort of waiting.
And I do think, I haven't really said this on the podcast yet, but I am fully moving back to York like I finally bought my first place and so like I I think that that will be a place where I can like root yeah because I am looking for that I think I deeply feel like my next step is to just feel like I can sit down and be comfortable in a place and like that would be nice if someone could be a part of that like anger. Ten toes down.
Yeah. Ten toes down vibe.
But it's interesting that you say all that stuff because feeling calm is something I never thought I wanted. Yes.
Because of. Same.
I always thought like that my thing was to challenge and buck the system and kind of like push and push. And now I'm really, I really feel lucky that I'm surrounded by a lot of people who are not that way, who are like more peaceful and peacemakers and kind of like a little bit like, it could be this, it could be that.
Like for the longest time being definitive and like certain and decisive was like safety. And now I'm like, luckily a little bit more like, I don't know.
Yeah. You know, I think it's interesting because one of your like, I would say defining comedic and like public traits is your energy.
Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, so I would imagine I identify with this, that sometimes when people like interact with you, they feel like they also need to bring a lot of energy.
And then there you are meeting that. And all of a sudden you exhausted and like, wait, hold on.

Where was I in that?

I was definitely talking. What was I saying? Oh yeah.
But it's interesting. You bring what you get, you know, praise for and credit for and like notices for, especially at a place I would imagine coming up through comedy and like, you know, having to make your way like, and being one of one in many ways and then getting to SNL and then having to like, I know it started really well for you pretty much.
Like you kind of hit the ground running. And then when you were in the main cast, like kind of right away, right? Yeah.
Pretty fast. Yeah.
So everything was happening really fast, but you probably had to give it. You know, we were like, it was a different time where there was less women.
You had to kind of, you know, for those that are not watching, I'm swinging my elbow. But, but you bring up something that's so true, which is I feel like, and getting back to like your fifties and osteoporosis, but I'm all about practicing my backhand.
That's my new phrase, which is my forehand has served me so well. It is, I've made a lot of shots.
I feel really confident. It's, I'm very, very grateful for what it's gotten me.
And now it's time to practice my backhand. What is the thing that I don't really always give as much attention to or practice to? And it's exactly that.
It's not depending on my energy to be the way that people connect with me or that sparring or conflict is going to be the way in which I can get something done, but just be a little bit more watery. Yeah.
It's thinking about how you communicate subtextually rather than literally or super textually where you're just like, I'm going to communicate what I think by saying it. And right.
It's something like this where it's like, well, this is a very four answer you're giving right now because I'm being such a four. No, because you're right.
You're saying like you're coming from a feeling place and I'm coming from an action place. Yeah.
Yeah. And that's a challenger thing.
That's an eight. Yeah, so the four is like,

how can I express my feelings

or have these feelings differently?

And it's like, what can I do differently?

And our work is to like,

and I'm so sorry if this is boring for anybody.

No, I love it.

But our work is to feel more.

Yeah.

And your work is to do more.

Less feelings, more doing.

And mine is more feelings, less doing.

Is Piggy an eight?

Is Miss Piggy an eight?

I think she is definitely an eight.

I think that makes sense.

Miss Piggy is kind of an island.

She is definitely an Enneagram.

That would be fun to do that with all the muck.

Well, Fozzie Bear is a seven.

I'm an enthusiast.

I think so.

I think Kermit's a nine.

He's a peacemaker.

Yeah.

He has to be the whole, the center of that place.

Yeah.

He's like, hey guys.

Yeah.

Wait. Maybe Kermit's my man.
Kermit's your man. Maybe I need to fuck this piggy up.
When she gets here, I'm going to be like, listen, I, although I think they broke up. Didn't they break up definitively? Remember the ABC show? They introduced that new pig girl.
Oh, I don't like that. I don't know this.
Do you remember? There's that new pig woman. Oh no.
And she was swooping in and trying was swooping in and trying to pick up Kermit

and the internet lost their mind.

They were like, get the fuck away from him.

She needs to get the fuck away.

She never stood a chance against Miss Piggy.

I got to watch this.

I did not know that.

And do you also remember

how public television is so great?

Sesame Street.

Do you remember when Sesame Street,

when I was growing up,

there was a character called Snuffleupagus?

Yes.

Okay, you too. But then they took Snuffleupagus away because it was frustrating kids.
Yeah, because why couldn't they see him? And I was like, ugh. Wait, but who said this? Didn't they say- No, someone said that they took him away because some kids, especially in the 80s when child abduction was a thing, they were like, parents would like, it was that like they wouldn't believe what kids kids were saying.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. A kid didn't feel believed.
Right. And like, it was at a time when you needed to trust what children were saying.
Like, I saw a strange man at the side of our street, you know? Like, there's, there's like a lot of implications when it comes to like, PBS and children's programming. Did you ever get to go down there to Sesame Street? I did.
I got to do something with Elmo, which is really cool. What did you guys do together? We did like a word of the day or something.
Awesome. Yeah.
And then, you know, and when I like, and I loved growing up, I loved, we had an Oscar the Grouch alarm clock. Oh, I like Oscar the Grouch.
Me too. I love Oscar.
He's a great resource. Larry David owes a lot to Oscar the Grouch.
Yes, yes. The alarm clock oh i like oscar the grouch he's a great resource larry david owes a lot to oscar yes yes the alarm clock used to start with it's gonna be a lousy day wake up it's gonna and it was such a gen x alarm clock like you could never do that now but yeah i love him that whole jim henson world i have to say it is perme permeated most of my life because it also was in the beginning of SNL.
But just like those Muppets and puppets are everywhere in my psyche. Yeah.
Absolutely. We got to send up a prayers up.
What the heck was that? Oh my God, that was Miss Piggy's squealing. Piggy's ears.
Her ears were burning. Wait, she's going to maybe come here? Yeah.
That is stressful though because have you ever been with someone who's working a puppet? No. So we heard that basically what it is is it's like they can go for like 25, 30 minutes at a time and then they need a short break.
It's stressful. Yeah.
I mean, God bless everyone who works puppets. It's amazing, but it's intense.
Yeah. Right.
Where do you look? Right. I guess you look at the puppet.
I'm going to have no problem looking right into Miss Piggy's eyes. I'm telling you, I'm committing so hard.
Okay, you'll be great. I might cry though because I feel the same sort of cosmic connection to her that you're talking about which is that I'm like, she was my first glimpse into old Hollywood and she's like modeled after those actresses.

She's modeled after like Peggy Lee, right?

Right.

Peggy Lee.

Yes.

Yeah.

And she was also kind of like in drag a little bit.

She had like a real vibe of like costumes

and you always were going into her world

and it was like satin.

And she was very like,

she was very feminine,

but she was a show girl.

She was a show girl. She was the last show girl with Pamela Anderson.

I just think she's beautiful.

Yeah.

And pigs have newly been become my favorite animal.

Oh really?

And a lot of cultures,

pigs are really,

really revered.

Revered.

Yeah.

So smart.

Are they one of the smart ones?

Yes.

Smart,

clean.

Very smart.

So I'm like,

now I'm like in this new kick where I'm finding out about how deep the

Thank you. They're really, really revered.
Revered? Yes. So smart.
Are they one of the smart ones? Yes. Smart, clean.
Very smart. So I'm like, now I'm like in this new kick where I'm finding out about how deep the intelligence of certain animals goes.
Like I went in on elephants the other day and now I'll never be the same. I know.
Did you know that octopuses decorate their homes? What? So the next time you go to like, I don't know, someplace on Larchmont and they're serving up a grilled puss. No way.

Just know that that puss was a decorator.

He was an interior decorator.

That was Nate Burkus.

That was the Nate Burkus of the seas.

That's so many arms.

You might be eating the Nate and Jeremiah of the seas.

Those arms can put up so much shiplap so fast.

Did you guys see my mom has revealed how obsessed she is with Nate and Jeremiah?

Oh, Nate and Jeremiah are incredible.

My dad was talking to me about-

We have a question. my mom has revealed how obsessed she is with Nate and Jeremiah incredible my dad was talking to me about I was on the phone with them and my mom was talking my mom started watching Queer Eye and she was like because Jeremiah joined yeah and now Jeremiah is an incredible addition and my dad says to me on the phone your mother is beaming ear to ear harder than I've ever seen her talking about Jeremiah Brent right now.
She loves him. They also decorate in this beautiful aesthetic that does feel like, how do I put this? Like no one will ever live there.
No, no, no, no. Like the tiling that they put in.
Like I watched there. Like when someone is just like, yeah, so we ripped out the floors.

I'm like, shut up. What are you talking about?

Like in all respect,

but I'm like,

I could never be like,

I want to rip out these floors.

I want to reupholster.

No.

I don't know what that word means.

It's hard.

And also there is something about,

I love interior design.

Do you?

I love it.

It's kind of like a,

I don't want to say a hobby,

but I love working with people and making spaces and looking at. Making it.
I love it. Yes's kind of like a, I don't want to say a hobby, but I love working with people and making spaces and looking at it.
I love it. Yes.
And I love looking at like magazines and looking at stuff online. And I find just like what people think is comfortable is so subjective.
It's just so subjective. And for me, the eye must rest.
My eye must rest. Got it.
So there's like, there was like an organizing show where it was like, what kind of organizer are you? Are you? So let me ask you this. Okay.
There's four different ways and I'm going to butcher this. But do you like a room where there's an open shelf and like, you know, your plates and cups and everything, you can see them? Floating? No way.
Sure. Absolutely not.
Okay. I'm sorry.
I'll let you go through all of right. So there's one where you're like floating shelf and cups and organized well, but visible.
Sure, sure, sure. One where they're behind a cabinet, organized behind a cabinet.
Those are two options. And then also, do you like to have, let's say you're putting away your important piece of paper.
Do you want to have it in a drawer where you throw it in, in a drawer and it's worth all the important papers and you'll organize it later? Or do you want to have a place that it lives every time? I see. I mean, here's my thing.
I don't like looking at cupboards. I don't like looking at cupboards and shelves.
I think I'm SOL. Some people like to see their stuff and some people like to not see their stuff.
I think it could be interesting to see my stuff. I am going to be the not see your stuff school because if one thing is off on the floating shelf and it's out on display, it's going to bug the shit out of me.
I'm never going to feel, I'm going to have that itch in my brain the entire time I'm looking at it. Yes.
And what about countertops, tables? Do they need to be clear? They pretty much have to be clear. He is such a strong aesthetic.
I mean, I keep telling him that he should get AD over to his place because it's so cute and cool. Get a product line going, Bowen.
Of like- Housewares. Yeah.
What about you? What are you doing? Would love to do that what come on everybody no there's too it's too well you know what I'm gonna take my own advice it's never too late it's never too late wait to do what but what to just have a housewares line have like a housewares line okay wait your conversation with Tina about this yeah don't you think I think she should open eyeglasses I've been trying to get Tina to make money off of eyeglasses for her entire life. But she refuses the side hustle.
She doesn't want to do it. I understand.
I respect it. Only do what you want to do.
Right. But you could do it too, Bowen.
I don't know. I'm of the same mind as Tina.
I'm like, what? Or no, where did she get in your head because she said it? No, I just, I've always thought the same thing. There's no practical reason for me to do that.

You know what I mean?

I'm going to sell socks, jerseys.

I'm selling it all.

Whatever.

I'm doing whatever.

I'm just sweatshirt with my face.

Put my name on the plastic water bottles, whatever.

No, yeah.

Only if you'd be into the design and into the aesthetic of it.

But something aesthetic would be interesting and fun to work on. Perhaps.
Perhaps. Mm-hmm.
Watch this space. I can see it for you.
I think you're a huge brand. Yes.
No, it's Bowen. I completely agree.
You know what I'm saying? Yes. I don't know, y'all.
I completely agree. But at least get AD into that house and get them to walk around and put your bowl of limes.
Show them your bowl of limes. My bowl of limes.
My Dakota Johnson bowl of limes. Wait, who was the bowl of limes again? Dakota Johnson.
Dakota Johnson. Incredible.
I love limes. I love limes.
I love limes. I love limes.
I actually do. But she said, I love limes.
And then afterwards, she was like, I don't know why I said know why I said that. She revealed later she doesn't know.
She was like a joke. Wait, now I'm actually thinking, because they say like, just think of some images that you like and like things that you'd want to see around your house.
I actually would love limes. I like limes.
Limes are so good. Or how about this? A bowl of artichokes.
Oh, I like artichokes. If you put artichokes in a bowl, you're a billionaire.
Really? Yes. I guess that is what that means.
If you put three artichokes in a silver bowl, you're Elon Musk. You're done.
I've always wanted to have bananas on the table. Of course, you can do that.
Nothing's stopping you. You can do that.
You can do that today. I don't think you understand what my living situation has been like.
It's only now that I'm like. Very seven.
Okay. We need to root it down.
Super seven. My life has been so seven.
It's been so like LA, New York, LA, New York. Where can I go next? Coachella again this weekend.
I'm exhausted. Living out of a suitcase.
Yeah. Very that.
And I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't. The seven has to, you know, the seven has to go to a nine, Peacemaker.
Your space has to be, your space is important. Yeah, it is.
It is. It is.
It is. What is your most interior design-y motif? I love, well, I love, right now my house is a California ranch, so I do like that kind of, a tiny bit of Quaker.
Quaker. There's a tiny bit of Quaker craft.
Like, I bit of quaker craft like i like a wood like i like a wood bench with like a patterned cushion yeah i like like a nice pattern rug with like a black sofa i like a warm tone chairs that match a warm tone table with like a an amber light fixture i like i like a bit masculine. It's coming at you so naturally and it's very masculine.
I literally, what I said to the guy who's doing my apartment is I was like, I want it to be like masculine, but light. You know what I mean? Like masculine can sometimes be like too much like steel.
That's what I'm saying. Not that.
You know, the word I said, Redford. Ooh.
Like it's kind of just like, it's giving like, like not denim, but like, like, like warm masculine, like wood. Yes.
But with like little light blue denim-y touches, like, cause they say look in your closet and that's like a hint as to what you might want to like, look like. And I'm leaning lately less mid-century and more like a little bit like worn and waspy.
Yeah. I'm trying to do more antique and flea pieces than new pieces.
But your masculine is, callback, Alinalda. My masculine is Alinalda.
Like a very groovy 70s suite. Loves his wife.
Because mid-century is kind of done. Don't you feel like everyone was doing mid-century? Sure.
Once like Dwell came out, like and everything was very like weird table and like, yeah, everything got a little too mid-century. And it's very LA.
Totally. Mid-century is there.
Well, the first time, the first apartment I ever got, I walked into West Elm. And the first thing I said was, does it look like I don't belong here? Because I thought like it was for fancy people.
And they said, no, what are you talking about? We'll help you. And so I, because I'm colorblind and have no taste.
I was like, um, I guess I like this. And I just pointed to a display and they were like, you like just this.
And I was like, yeah, I think I like this for my living room. They're like, you don't want to change anything.
I go, um, oh yeah, the rug, which rug would you like that one? And that's what happened that's what happened. Great.
But they're not supposed to make you feel that way. No, they didn't.
They were so beautiful and lovely in the West Side. I think you're telling an old story about yourself.
I think you do have a sense of style. And colorblind.
I know a lot of men are. A lot of men are.
That's true. What do you mean that doesn't? I was going to say that doesn't, I don't think that correlates to taste or style.
I've been very malleable in my settings. Like, I live, I'm subletting something in New York right now and the guy has like a crazy pink gallery wall with all sorts of different colorful pictures on it.
And I've just been like, yeah, I live here and I like it. And I have no idea whether or not I do or don't.
That's a sublet reality. I'm the one that's asking him like, what are the spaces that you like? Where do you feel comfortable? And I'm literally like, you should think of your favorite restaurant at Disney World.
I love being everywhere. I love being in a sushi place.
I love being in a Mexican spot in Epcot. Yeah.
But do you like, like I like things to feel nice. Yeah.
I love texture. So I have these two chairs in my living room that are upholstered with like that really fuzzy, like.
Yes, the fuzzy stuff. Fuzzy stuff.
He's got that. And why I like is when I walk by them, I like always touch them.
You pet them. But they're made to clean.
Oh, but you know, that's okay. This isn't, you're not going to be worried about cleaning.
I'm covered in buffalo sauce most of the time. sauce most of the time I didn't tell you that eat it on the thing when we ran through my financials I forgot about like 98% of it is buffalo sauce I have so much buffalo sauce like all my shit you know what you should do just do one room just do one room like what would be your version of the nice of a nice room yeah yeah that's great just one room see what I love is like also like I love when I go to someone's house like in the suburbs and the living room is like the beach and the bathroom is the ocean.
And that's just what it is. It's like almost every suburban house is like, my bathroom is the bottom of the sea.
I know. You know, and there's seashells.
Well, I always say people's houses, people either want to tell you where they've been or where they are. Oh.
One or the other. They never tell you where they're going.
So exactly. So it's like, where have I been? I've like have African masks and I have, you know, saris and I have like all this stuff that I've collected or we are in Denver, baby.
And you're going to know it. You're going to know that we are in Colorado.

Like it's one or the other.

Yep.

Well, I think Matt has a lot to work with in terms of where he's been and where he is.

One thing I don't want to do,

a lot of gay guys,

like in their first apartments,

they have a big gay picture.

Yes.

Like of someone's tricep

or like someone laying on the beach

and it's just like this part of someone's body.

I think I can forego big gay picture.

And never sleep on a plant and a mirror.

See you next time. Someone's tricep or like someone laying on the beach.
It's just like this part of someone's body. I think I can,

I can forego big gay picture.

And never sleep on a plant and a mirror.

See plants have been something I never interacted with.

And I love a mirror.

Yeah.

Oh God.

A mirror and a plant.

Mirror and a plant.

Can change your life.

A mirror and a plant creates a large space.

And there's like AI now that you can put your room in and it'll tell you all this stuff. It's incredible.
Damn, AI.

Yeah. We're going to fix that

with AI. Oh yeah, people should know that.

Have you already spoken about it on the

pod? No, we haven't. So we've heard you guys

say that our new profile

image for Las Culturistas, I am

out of focus. I

do see it. I do think it

is a striking picture. It's one of my favorite photos

that Bowen and I have taken. And I'm

hesitant to change it because Bowen looks so insanely good in it. You can't.
But I think I look good. It's just that I'm out of focus.
I think it's she. This is a really interesting experiment about how we see ourselves and how do we want people to see us? Yeah.
Yes. But I think it's also a statement on depth.
You are getting depth because this side of your face is not, it is in focus and then this side isn't. Yeah.
My right eye is in focus. But you know, don't you deserve to be in focus? I think I do.
Don't you? Absolutely. Doesn't one deserve to be in focus? I'm bringing my four energy into this.
I'm like being academic about a lot. Yeah.
And also you're, it's an incredible picture of you. It is such a good picture.
Thank you. And it's a great picture of you too.
But I mean, I would try to get in focus.

You had said maybe AI can get you in focus.

And you were saying, I don't know if I want that.

Because I don't want to necessarily support AI.

Right, right.

But then again, at this point,

it's like we have to just kind of like succumb.

Throw our hands out.

It's too late.

This is all AI.

Everything is all made of AI.

Everything is artificial.

I've been AI for nine years.

This is going to be H-I, human. We are about to go into I don't think so, honey.
This is the human intelligence part of the podcast. Hold on.
Oh, tasty high note. Oh, hi.
Don't mind me. I'm practicing my new baritone sax.
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helixsleep.com forward slash lostculturistas. So this is, I don't think so, honey, this is in our 60-second segment where we sort of tear up culture.
And, you know, I've realized something. I was on the drive home with Patrick Rogers, come back from Coachella, and a motorcyclist went by us really fast.
And Patrick said, his mom's nurse, and said, you know, my mom saw the gnarliest things from motorcyclists. Motorcyclists? And that was her one rule.
You're never getting on a motorcycle because of what I've seen in the ER. And one other thing, and this is what I thought.
Oh, this is all the preamble. I thought you were going to do something.
That was just the preamble. My God, exciting.
This is Matt Rogers. I don't think so, honey.
His time starts now. I don't think so, honey.
Trampolines. You don't need it.
Like, honestly, your kids don't need to be up that high. You're right.
What I would say is get like, I don't know, like get like a room, like a matted room. You know what I mean? Like if you have a trampoline, you can afford a trampoline.
You probably have like a playroom or a designated area where the kids go, pad it like a cell, have the kids toss themselves all around the room. That is better than trampolines.
And also, let me tell you something about people, people who have trampolines. You're also good old days people.
Like, oh, in the good old days, we could just, who cared about the nets on the trampoline? I could ride my bike to Connecticut. You know what? I don't care.
The good old days stuff is problematic. Like protect your children.
Don't even get me started on zip lines. You'll have some people with zip lines, like from one tree to the other in their own backyard.
My dad made one for us and we had a trampoline. And I'm looking back thinking, I'm glad I have my neck.
I don't think so, honey. I want to say what my dad said to me, to you.
When I was little, I used to play with a stick. Get the screens out.
Get the trampolines out there. Just give the kid a stick.
Have him run around in the yard or in a padded cell. And also enough with the video games because your brains are melting.
And that's one. Oh, is that it? Okay.
Well, it's a minute and 15. Well, wow.
I let my sister go. It's okay.
I feel like the trampoline culture. You lost the teens at the end with the video games.
I think I lost the teens so long ago. Yeah, it's okay.
It's okay. It's all right.
The teens are all about, the slang has been video games with Gen Alpha and Gen Z, like side quests and NPCs. It's like, this is permeating the culture with them in a way that I'm like, y'all bet we all should develop a video game vocabulary on the basics.
And I agree with you about trampolines. None of my childhood memories include jumping on them.
None of my good childhood memories. You know what I mean? Broken bones.
You know where you're going to end up? The pit. The pit.
And it's the worst place to be. And the wait time is long.
Is that part of the show? Long wait times, there's a bed shortage. Oh, it's a mess.
Dear God. It's a mess.
It's stressful, but it's real time, no scoring, grounded acting. I couldn't believe it this morning.
Like when Patrick was like, yeah, my mom said, it's insane what you watch happens to the human body on motorcycles. And then he was like, and trampolines.
And I was like, don't even keep going. I can't.
If you're going to ride a motorcycle- Like the bone breaks on kids. Right.
If you're going to ride a motorcycle, and this sounds a little insensitive, at least go on the donor list. Well, yeah.
At least make it useful for society. So am I.
Of course. Of course.
Come on. Cut me open.
Get on the- cut me open and take this stuff. Some of this stuff is good in here.

Yeah.

Some of this stuff is still good.

These eyes?

Oh, honey.

Someone should have.

I was noticing them.

Are we giving gray blue?

Well, you know what?

I think we are.

We're giving gray blue.

Yeah.

Wonderful.

All right.

Well, that was mine.

That was incredible.

Wow.

This is hard to do this third.

I just have to say,

because you guys are so good at this. No, we're setting you up for success.
Oh yeah. And I want you to chime in on mine after I'm done.
Or during, please, please. Okay, okay, okay.
Okay. So this is- Have you ever done someone's that you've done what they were going to do? No, never.
I was sweating on yours because I have a little bit of crossover. Tiny man.
Oh, really? That's good. Nothing bad, nothing bad.
Thematically tied. Here is Here is Bowen Yang's, I don't think so, honey.
His time starts now. I don't think so, honey.
Standards and practices, we should be able to say at least five shits and five fucks on SNL per season. Because after this whole ego won't him, Miss Eggie, because these men ain't what, shit moment.
First of all, favorite moment of televised history ever. Incredible.
Second of all, we are so hampered in our comedy at SNL by not being able to say shit and fuck. Celeste and I talk about this all the time.
Let us say shit and fuck. Like it's us.
It's Abbott. It's ghosts.
We're the last network comedy. It's like, can you give SNL an exception, an exemption? Like if we're dismantling the FCC because of Trump, like can we at least, can one boon, can one silver lining be that we get to say shit and fuck? And I'm even keeping it to an allotment, to an allotted five and five, five shits, five fucks.
It would bring a sketch to the next level. It would make it so that you would be able to like know, oh, this is the real world.
It's not a heightened sketch reality. Shit and fuck are so comedically powerful as words.
I really think it would help us. And that's one minute.
Yes. So were they intense about that? Incredible.
Did the hammer come down? I don't think anything came down, which I love. And Ego was like, no.
That was hilarious. So funny.
But don't you agree? Wouldn't it have been this much more fun? And I'm going to say, NBC, I think you can monetize this. Yes.
Why don't you agree wouldn't it have been this much more fun and I'm gonna say NBC I think you can monetize this yes why don't you have a competition and people can vote like American Idol as to which cast member gets to say the shit oh my god so you gotta be like if you want Bowen to say it you know text 0032 on your phone and let Bowen say it. Thank you.

Or if you want to monetize it

in a way that is like,

I don't know,

like GoFundMe coded,

like just have a fundraiser

for our FCC fines

and just help us cover our fines

for the five shits

and the five fucks

that we get to say.

100%.

You know who should get to say it?

Like whenever he decides

to stop Keenan

on his last episode,

the whole 90 minutes

should just be him

saying whatever the fuck he wants. Well, you can treat it like vacation days.
You don't use it and it rolls over to the next year. And then you get to say 10 of them.
Yes, exactly. Casual Saturday Night Live.
Rack them up. I really like that.
I never understood. And I actually, I don't understand.
Because you can say, you can say dick on the show. May I offer one small counterpoint yes please i do think there's something fun about not being able to say it yes that causes comedic tension of course fun so you it may the air may be let out of that you're right when you do and you might not get the juice that you wanted to choose you want it because you't have it.
I also feel like shit's not even really a curse word anymore.

Come on.

Like over time, it's like,

who is actually bothered if their kid says shit?

Who is actually bothered?

Fuck, I understand, is one thing.

It's like, it's, I guess, still a little taboo.

But like shit and ass.

Well, it's the thing.

You can say ass.

You can't say asshole.

You can say taint, but you can't. No, you can't say taint because it's a it's the same.
You can say ass. You can't say asshole.
You can say taint,

but you can't, no, you can, you can say taint because it's a part of the body.

Oh, you can?

Yeah. We've, we've had, we've had standards notes on this.
Um, you can say, you can say

taint, but you can't say like.

Taint hole.

Gooch or whatever. You know what I mean? Because it's like, it's not anatomically precise.

Unless the musical guest is named Gooch.

And then you can say,

ladies and gentlemen,

Gooch.

Once again,

Gooch.

That would be,

that would be a hack.

Anyway,

that's,

that's my,

that's my thought.

Oh my God,

that's a good one.

Okay.

This is a moment in time.

Listen.

Okay.

Is that okay?

Yes.

Of course it's okay.

The greats have taken notes.

Let me see.

Okay.

Your notes.

All right.

I'm ready.

I'm ready.

So this is Amy Poehler's,

I don't think so,

honey.

Her time starts now.

Okay.

I don't Think So, Honey. Her time starts now.
Okay, I Don't Think So, Honey. Horror movies.
Okay. Okay.
Life is scary enough. I do not need to unlock a new fear.
I have a very active amygdala. I have a decent amount of empathy.
I do not want to watch a young couple have to eat their own eyeballs to get out of a locked room. Okay.
And don't tell me that it's about the rush of being in the same room with people and feeling social, because if you want to get that kind of like social bonding, you need to go to church, not a horror movie. And by the way, church is another thing that I don't go to anymore as an adult because I've realized it's not for me.
There's three things that shorten your life. Motorcycles, agree with you.
15 seconds. Smoking and violent images.
And then lastly, this also means pranks. No pranks.
A jump scare and a prank is a hate crime. Five seconds.
If you prank me, that means you hate me. The only devil that I want to see on the screen is the one that wears Prada.
Thank you! And that's one minute. Excellent.
I am with you so hard. I went to go see the movie Drop.
No. No.
But can I say, I advocate for this movie because it wasn't, and this is in all positivity, it wasn't that scary. It was a thrilling, suspenseful B movie.
Not violent. You're talking about violent images.
No. Never.
But can I say, I advocate for this movie because it wasn't, and this is in all positivity, it wasn't that scary. It was a thrilling, suspenseful B movie.
Not violent. You're talking about violent images.
No. Yes.
I'm telling you. I don't like any kind of scare.
No scare. When people die in a movie, it's sad.
The world is too scary. The news is rough.
I cannot handle it. My nervous system cannot handle it.
And I could never handle it.

And I just want to say this.

I did participate in pranks at one point in my life.

The patriarchy comes for all of us. Yeah.

We all, but I apologize.

And I have listened and learned.

And no more pranks for me.

Honestly, we don't, we don't prank each other.

Have we ever pranked each other?

No.

And I want to say, I would never do that to you.

This is a real call out.

There were some Instagram accounts.

Diet Prada did a whole April Fool's thing of like,

They're not going to have a whole day of like fake as- No, no, no. But like when you look at the movies, it's like, what do you want to see? The gorge or a baby in the basket? There's a whole.
It's like, am I? Like, is this a punishment? Well, yes. I mean, it's literally punished.
I think it's. Well, there's a whole community of people whose whole thing is like, I'm going to go watch these movies where like with the final girl of it all.

I know.

That means at least six or seven young women are dead.

No.

No.

I hate when people die.

You ever seen the movie Zodiac?

I did. See, tough for me because there's that one horrible scene.

I know.

Where he comes and murders the couple in broad daylight.

I know.

Are you kidding me? And then it's also real. Yeah, it was real.
It happened. God.
God. Why do we have to make everything a movie about everything? True crime is so nasty.
Why do we have to make, if it was bad and it happened, let's not make a movie about it. We can read about it.
We can read about it. We can listen to podcasts about it.
See, but the podcasts are even worse sometimes because then it's like, it's all happening in your head. You fill in the gaps.
But the images. Is this how you feel about true crime? Okay.
So I had a moment, a true crime moment, you know, because I'm a white lady of a certain age. So I did have a true crime moment, but I can't watch anything.

I see.

I can read or listen,

but I can't watch anything.

Right.

That's about true crime.

Like any of those dates,

any,

even softy stuff,

like softball stuff,

like I cannot watch it.

Does softy stuff count as,

does like cult stuff count as softy stuff?

Cult?

A cult documentary.

Well,

that one isn't as bad,

but,

um,

I don't understand people

that join cults.

Right.

I can't relate.

Even as an Enneagram 7.

Yeah,

I was going to say,

you have a high cult

susceptibility.

I'm probably the closest,

but I don't get it either.

I did like the one

where the,

Love is One.

Yeah,

because Mother is Resting

is when she asked for the chicken parmesan. I was just going to say, and this is my, he hasn't watched it, but I'm like my selling point to him is like, there's this whole segment in an episode where they go through the, her recipes, like galactic taco salad.
She's screaming at these people like, where's my chicken pie? Like, it's amazing. And the term mother is resting is incredible.
But she's talking in wingdings. Right.
And everyone is sitting by her bed and it's like, I don't get it. I don't get it.
It's tough. I just didn't want to see.
When I heard she was like actually dead and blue in the first scene, I was like, that was really hard for me to bat my head around watching.

Yeah.

Culture tough.

But when a woman's in charge,

it's a little bit more fun.

That is why it's fun.

I even get scared of like urban legends and conspiracy theories.

Also like when I was a kid,

no spooky stories.

I didn't be like being scared.

I didn't like,

I do not like that feeling.

Oh,

there was a show.

Are you afraid of the dark?

This was on Nickelodeon when I was a kid. And there was one episode with Tia and Tamara, who I love.
The storyline was one of them gets like cursed and turns into a lizard. And then the lizard becomes the other one.
So like, so it was this crazy situation where- Was it scary? One of them was a lizard and one of them was a real girl. And they were played by Tia and Tamara.
Tia was like real and Tamara was like the lizard who had become a human. And their best friend who they shared was like, had to spray one of them with a hose.
And the one they sprayed would turn into a lizard. And the girls were like, it's me, Tiffany.
It's me. You know, it's me.
And she was like, Tiffany, don't you remember the times you would have at recess? You do. And then she was like, and it became a thing where she sprayed the one.
There's a huge hug. The last scene of it is, we'll say it's Tia, has picked up the other lizard and goes, like, literally.
She didn't say this. It was Nickelodeon.
But she was basically like, bye, bitch. And threw her down a well.

Crushed her.

And that was the real one.

Terrifying.

And that was children's entertainment.

That aired after Sesame Street. That literally, they expected me as a child of the 90s to hold both these things.

That like Miss Piggy's queen and also like Tia and Samira at each other's fucking throats.

One of them would see the other one dead

crushed at the bottom of a well.

And that was like children's entertainment.

Oh my God.

That and the Goosebumps books.

Fuck off.

Fuck off.

No more.

Fuck off.

R.L. Stine.

He was around UCB for a while.

You know that?

Oh, he was?

He came to a lot of Bass Cats.

He was like...

He was.

I remember one time I was going in maybe to do Mod Night.

Did you get goosebumps when you came in?

I think it was like he had been

part of a spank or something.

Which was the name of a show.

We were coming in to do Mod Night

and they were like, R.L. Stine is here.

Yeah, this is where it gets inside base. We had a spank.
We had a fun spank. We did.
We got a run. We got a run out of it.
Oh, you did? You did. Bo gave us a run.
Bo gave us a run. Pop Roulette's amazing earth.
Nice. Maybe it's on YouTube.
Maybe it's on YouTube. Well, damn.
I mean, this is so fun. It was a good hang.
It was a good hang. Congrats on having the most successful podcast in the landscape.
Thank you. I hope someday you'll want to do it.
We will want to do it. Come on.
It would be my absolute joy. You've been killing it.
And I mean, truly. Any advice? You know, we talked about advice before we leave.
Any advice for me? Don't change a thing about it. The reason we've done this for so long is because it's basically, formally the same thing as episode one.
Don't add too many bells and whistles. I was going to say what you've innovated on in the podcast is starting out with that panel discussion with the people who know your guests.
I'm like, that's so damn smart. And just keep it exactly the same.
Don't change a thing. Don't overthink it.
Don't overthink it. And also, like over time we accumulated more people because we started as like you know doing our own thing it's like you started it and immediately it was like the the the like everyone came and like you know started listening but over time people started to have like notes for it and that's when you're like oh that's because everyone's gonna want something different from it so I would just say like keep it fun for you and like everyone's going to want something different for it like I like it when it's people from SNL or like I want it like when it's this or I like when it's like anecdotes or this like just keep having fun.
Stay true to yourself Yeah The most boring advice No but it's true listen your instinct. What is your space? Redford.
Yeah, Redford. Redford.
Redford. Alan Alda.
And Alan Alda. 70s Queens.
70s Queens. Well, we had every episode with a song.
Oh. What is the song? Hmm.
It comes. It's coming Hold on

Hello hello baby you called

I can't hear a thing

I have got no service in the club

You say you say

What did you say oh you're breaking up on me

Sorry I cannot hear you

I'm kind of busy

Maybe Beyonce will come out this weekend

When we're there

Bye Bye Bye Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Kind of busy. Maybe Beyonce will come out this weekend when we're there.
Shit.

Ooh.

Bye. Bye.

Yeah.

We didn't get to pause, honestly. This is Bowen Yang.
And Matt Rogers from Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers. And Bowen Yang.
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