Ep 516 - Gloom Flower (feat. Sam Tallent, Lemaire Lee, & Shawn Gardini)

Speaker 1 Wow, wow, Wes.

Speaker 1 Are we live? All right, we're starting now.

Speaker 1 Hey.

Speaker 1 Hello. Hey, everybody.
Welcome back to the motherfucking podcast. Another week on this hellacious Gravatron we call an Earth.

Speaker 1 Twisted Blue Marble, man.

Speaker 1 Can't stand up on this Gravatron.

Speaker 1 Sam Talon, thank you for joining us. Well, there, Gardini.
Thank you for having me. Thank you guys less.

Speaker 1 I thought me and Matt were just going to be in here and talking about men's stuff. We can talk about men's stuff.
Men's table, boys' table.

Speaker 1 I love my fellow man. I'm not going to demean men.

Speaker 1 You were wearing a parranger shirt, boys table.

Speaker 1 Your uncle died and you got that shirt.

Speaker 1 He's got the basic brand on. LeMaire, thank you for the hookup, by the way, in Rhode Island.
Oh, this too? Yeah, the studio was.

Speaker 1 LeMaire, I thought you designed it, man. Yeah.
Just fucking like action figures everywhere. Oh, you were the goo who gave.
Shout out to the bros, though. They'd held it down.

Speaker 1 I interviewed Glenn Larley. Yeah.

Speaker 1 coming out. Dude, did you meet Beans? Yeah, Bobby Beans, yeah, Bobby Beans rules.
That's your bro. Yeah, the white bull, right? Yeah,

Speaker 1 why not that white bull? You got bros all over? Oh, Lamar,

Speaker 1 yeah, dude. Spud was just in marveling over your tentacles across the

Speaker 1 United States of Lamerica. Yeah, the Lamar.
Their diaspora is thick. Yo, every, I swear to God, anytime I'm like Lamar, I'm going to be here.
I want to find a studio.

Speaker 1 I know somebody has like a studio over there. And your bros are solid, dude.
Yeah. Absolute beast.
Keep them tight. I assume that the walls walls are typically like rubber, you know?

Speaker 1 Like, I feel like some of these studios are just like this place. They were former sex parlors.

Speaker 1 This place was a former. This is probably where all the anal went down, by the way.

Speaker 1 We're in the back of the Black Rabbit.

Speaker 1 That's why it's called the chicory conference. Black Rabbit.

Speaker 1 Soon to be. Yeah, this is definitely the anal chamber.

Speaker 1 Directly.

Speaker 1 Maybe just gay stuff, actually.

Speaker 1 This might have been the strictly gay dungeon. This is the closet.
It might be such a good podcasting space. Yeah, because that's what we're doing.

Speaker 1 This is the gayest thing.

Speaker 1 This is as close to gay as I get, goddammit. Yep, it is.
These labels we put on ourselves. I do have a theory that every old man turns like hopelessly homosexual at like 65.

Speaker 1 I don't know why I have this theory in my head. Like, every time, like an old man in the airport looks at me, I'm like, you want to fuck me, you old nasty.

Speaker 1 You old nasty. Dude, he's giving you an up-down.
I'm telling you, man, I have a theory that every man at 60 turns, like, like, wildly, wildly gay, and uncontrollably gay.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, it's all it's like every man's fate at like 60 to be like, I can't take it anymore, dude. Yeah, goddamn.
Yeah, I tried this fucking bullshit for 65 years. Yeah,

Speaker 1 got me here. You know what? Why didn't I just fuck my boys?

Speaker 1 That's my brother's logic. True.
That's true. Jibs was just here.
He fucking almost hit us with a hot shot. Well, maybe that's not our business to dive on.

Speaker 1 What happened? Well, never mind. We almost got infected with HIV.
We were bug chasing with debris when he was here last year. Now that's a podcast.

Speaker 1 Bug chasing with jibs. Did you guys almost catch some Finn?

Speaker 1 No, no. I don't, I don't.
No, he doesn't want this in the public forum, right? I shouldn't have broken it. You guys don't want to highlight all of your cocaine.
He had a fucking hit.

Speaker 1 It was just sore like two days into the hang. Gotcha.

Speaker 1 Right after we smoked the jib.

Speaker 1 Bro, you got to let us know. That's the worst.
You can't get a cold sore

Speaker 1 passing the blunt.

Speaker 1 No, no.

Speaker 1 I don't think so. No, it's not.
It's not a a passing blunt. Us, we, I don't think, I don't think

Speaker 1 we were kissing a lot, too. So

Speaker 1 you just want to get you just don't want to get them on your dick. Getting a cold sore is nothing.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I was born and I had, I got cold sores like as a child.
Did you really? Yeah, because I think my mom had bore the cross. My mom bore the cross as well, but I didn't get it.

Speaker 1 I don't have them down south, but I'll pop one up, and then everyone's like, oh, you were living. It's like, no, my mom was a child of the 70s.

Speaker 1 My mother lived. She lived long.
She was living.

Speaker 1 I don't don't think it's, is it necessarily sexual to get cold to her? I think it just gets passed down through the generations. I hope not because I get them.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 I think if you're just like, face is just puckered in misery for long enough, they spring out.

Speaker 1 Just a gloom flower.

Speaker 1 Oral herpes.

Speaker 1 Oh, here we go. Oh, of course you could get it from sex.

Speaker 1 Oral sex with the

Speaker 1 honest one. I think it's from kissing all your old aunties, dude.

Speaker 1 Aunties are freakies.

Speaker 1 I might start seeing their test. Did you get tested recently before KSM?

Speaker 1 I need to see the papers, dude. You need the anti-bugs.

Speaker 1 It's like you're in prison. You're checking people's passports.

Speaker 1 That would be good, though.

Speaker 1 I might start a thing like a non-profit where I can check it out. Freak checking the anties.
Or just like at the, you know, they're all fucking at the, whatchamacallit? The

Speaker 1 I might get them papers and be like, bro. You can totally cream pie this old lady.
I don't want to be graphic, but I'm saying, like, it'd be nice.

Speaker 1 We'll be there one day, dude. You want to know? Let me just check the chart real quick.

Speaker 1 Won't be needing this.

Speaker 1 That must be crazy. Nobody talks about the CP in the retirement.
The freak off in the old lady.

Speaker 1 Dude, just having your new balances on and just being like,

Speaker 1 in the retirement home. You know the nurses can hear you.

Speaker 1 Wagwan, my little man.

Speaker 1 Mother Magan, they got freaking.

Speaker 1 They're fucking.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like an old Haitian woman has to wheel you into the room to get fucked by some guy, and then you ring a bell and she comes and retrieves you. Yeah, damn, it always helps you.

Speaker 1 An old Haitian lady can't do that. She's too beautiful.
She's johnny. Yeah, true.
Oh, my lord. No, you can't say that that wasn't proven.

Speaker 1 Just because you saw it on TV does not make it true. Just because you have those braids doesn't mean you can go crazy on the island violence.

Speaker 1 I did hear, whatchamacallit, J.D. Vance came through because they were like pressing him on that question.

Speaker 1 He was like, well, here's the thing, whether or not a Haitian woman ate a cat, there are still boots on the ground reality to the immigration crisis that you guys at CNN aren't, whoever it was, aren't covering.

Speaker 1 He kind of definitely maneuvered around it. Yeah.
That's all it is now. Sticky move.
Sticky move. Yeah, sticky move.

Speaker 1 Sticky move. Well, whether or not people are eating cats is less the point.
And it's like, well, it's pretty important. It's cool to know.
My theory was to get the pets to start eating the immigrants.

Speaker 1 That was my solution.

Speaker 1 But also this weekend. Where'd you push that?

Speaker 1 Stand-up comedy show.

Speaker 1 Did you funny joke show?

Speaker 1 So you say that within the context of stand-up comedy, lifting the spirits of of the masses.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was in jest. But what if they are eating cats? Who gives a fuck? They're street cats.
We don't need those cats.

Speaker 1 I stand with LeMaire. I would not be too mad.
If someone ate a stray cat, I'd be like, bro, this is looking, things are looking up in there. Yeah.
Sick of these nasty little creatures walking around.

Speaker 1 Get these cats fired up. I think there was, weren't the rats true? Weren't people spitting the rats? Like, barbecuing the rats? I think they've been doing that in New York for a long time.
Forever.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of rats. The poor people in New York, I think they've just been munching the critters

Speaker 1 forever. It's a renewable protein source.
Yeah. I don't either.
That's why, dude, rabbits were the original.

Speaker 1 What is that? It's rats on the spit.

Speaker 1 Those are big enough.

Speaker 1 These things are huge, bro. Those are raccoons.
It's like a capybara. Well, dude, here's the thing.
Dude, in America.

Speaker 1 It's a marmot for sure. In America, I think in the colonial times, people used to eat rabbit.
That's what it was. People used to eat rabbit like it was nothing.

Speaker 1 So it's like, you know, and apparently rabbits like a very high source of protein. You can actually get sick because they have so much protein, you're not getting any fat.

Speaker 1 There's like a certain illness you can get from just eating rabbit, but you do get shredded. You got to mix it with beef.
You got to mix it with beef.

Speaker 1 I think with vegetables and grains, you can't just be crushing rabbits all day. Well, you need a fat.
That's the problem.

Speaker 1 If you're eating just rabbit, you're not getting enough fat, and you get so shredded that it becomes a medical problem. That's the big thing for bug out people.

Speaker 1 It's like the first thing you're supposed to do if like the bomb falls is go out and find two breeding pairs of rabbits. That's, I'm telling you.

Speaker 1 Because then rabbits will procreate at a rate that will feed your family. You'll have an abundance of rabbits if you lock them in your basement as like there's nuclear fallout out there.

Speaker 1 Yep, but you got to find like an avocado too somewhere. Find an avocado.
A single peach pit. Tater.

Speaker 1 I was with Spud recently, and he was saying

Speaker 1 we were talking about how important it is to just have like a bro crash your house into your marriage and just try to like fight your wife for you a little bit.

Speaker 1 He was in his friend house.

Speaker 1 It's just such a funny

Speaker 1 funny thing because he was like, yeah, I don't know. I guess you got pissed because I was in there talking about bug out bags.

Speaker 1 No wife wants to hear bros talking bug out bags, dude. Man, Spud's a fucking rock tumbler for a wife.
Spud is the best, dude. I was with him all weekend in Rhode Island.

Speaker 1 With Nick Rochefort, yes, with Nick Rochefort.

Speaker 1 It was amazing, dude. Johnny Del Calo, dude.
It was very good. Oh, dude, we were saying that's big for white culture.
It was huge for white culture.

Speaker 1 This is literally, this was the all-white party, bro.

Speaker 1 Fuck the Hamptons.

Speaker 1 White excellence.

Speaker 1 It was, man, it was funny.

Speaker 1 It was a very funny weekend. Having Spud up there the whole time, it was unbelievable.
Nick Rocheford is honestly one of the funniest people in the world. He's insanely funny.
It's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 I get mad how funny he is. Yes,

Speaker 1 it almost hurts when you're sitting there at dinner and it's like, dude, you're literally saying the funniest stuff for 30 straight minutes. Take a break, dude.

Speaker 1 I need to recharge. This is amazing.
Did you see him on skanks? No. Oh, yeah.
He was Mud Vein? Yeah. That was so funny.
He's so fucking funny, dude.

Speaker 1 Spud should supply that service to married men, bro. You should hire out Spud to come stay in your house for a week and just confront all of your wife's most sacred ideals.

Speaker 1 You want to send your wife on tilt 1800 Spud. True, just to like break her out of the girl algorithm a little bit.
Women need to know about bug out bags.

Speaker 1 True.

Speaker 1 They did get girls against conspiracies. They somehow tapped into the female hive mind of like, if someone's talking about conspiracies, don't fuck them.
Dude, women would have too many bug out bags.

Speaker 1 They carry a bug out bag in all their channels.

Speaker 1 they just bug out about the wrong stuff all of their bugs are just about their appearance

Speaker 1 true they're micro buggers that's all they care about

Speaker 1 they're like i don't need food i don't need a gun

Speaker 1 they're just constantly on the edge of an apocalypse at all times and they're peering over into it yeah it's fucking tremendous you know what's you know what's actually to their credit i so i have my aura ring now so i'm tracking my biometrics you have two just one this is my wedding ring

Speaker 1 love of my wife love of the data and

Speaker 1 dude, she has one.

Speaker 1 And I got the glimpse because they, I didn't know it was such a big part of them or they're big pitched to women is they can track their cycle, which I was always like, you know, when that shit's coming.

Speaker 1 What the fuck do you care? Dude, so I get a readiness score every day. Not bragging today.
I'm at like 91% readiness. It's pretty sick.

Speaker 1 She gets the same amount of sleep as me. When she was on her period, I would peep her readiness score.
51%, dude. It goes down that bad.
It goes down that bad, dude. Damn.
I checked her sleep.

Speaker 1 Again, eight out.

Speaker 1 we're getting like seven eight hours i i checked my sleep again i have a problem with deep sleep i don't know why but it's like i'm everything's blue everything's looking good i have the little red bar for deep sleep hers was just red dude whoa every like their body temperature goes up a couple degrees red is good or bad bad oh i see dude it's like they can sleep for eight hours and wake up as if i had been drinking all night that's their baseline They wake up like that.

Speaker 1 And you know, they're crushing the frenzia too. So it's like, then they try to

Speaker 1 slapping the bag to try to hide from the pain of their period. And that only makes it so much fun.
Put the red in, put the red out.

Speaker 1 They turn into like a tandoori oven for three days in a month. My wife is so hot because they're trying to burn off the walls of their uterus.

Speaker 1 It's fucked, man. I can tell when she's about to blow because she's like not using the top blanket.

Speaker 1 Bat in the hatches, boys.

Speaker 1 I'll be in the crow's nest.

Speaker 1 You can bake bread on the side of her uterus. Yeah, for sure to slap it out.

Speaker 1 Dude,

Speaker 1 I didn't know it was that bad.

Speaker 1 I told her this. I was like, I thought you guys were just fucking dickheads.
Like, I didn't know you were having serious biochemical reactions while you're having your period. It's brutal, dude.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 A 49% drop is crazy. Bro, it's rugged, man.
I saw it and I was like, oh,

Speaker 1 like their body temperature is elevated, their heart rate's elevated. My heart rate at nighttime is like 53 beats a minute, bro.
Whoa. It's nice.
It's good. It's a dip down, dude.
Mine's bad.

Speaker 1 It's like a rabbit. I don't know, but I know it's bad.
You just have prey body. It's just

Speaker 1 I wake up like I need to like scurry away.

Speaker 1 They're going to hear that heartbeating cookie, bro.

Speaker 1 The fucking falcons that come through the window. Those night predators.

Speaker 1 Just owls banging off the window.

Speaker 1 Although, and again, I'm saying this with all due respect. Do you think, how do you think Asians feel about the cat eating stereotype being shifted?

Speaker 1 They're probably pretty short. They were in the hot seat for a while.
Yeah. That's such a bum rap to catch.
Yeah. 10% you eat cats.
It's like, no, I don't. Yeah, everybody wants to be Jamaican.

Speaker 1 The cats need eats. Nobody goes to eating cats.
Jamaicans eat cats? No, Jamaicans don't eat cats. I said they don't eat cats.
They eat delicious goats. Yeah, they eat delicious goats.

Speaker 1 All mutton all the time. Talk about pussy.
Yeah, they don't like the poon-poon. Oh, true, true.

Speaker 1 Everybody wants to be Jamaican when it comes to eating cats. You don't think they eat any pussy? I have a theory that they do secretly.
I think humans are eating. They eat pussy.
No, no.

Speaker 1 They wear a mask.

Speaker 1 I think when white guys turn older, we become gay, and Jamaican guys start thinking about eating pussy constantly.

Speaker 1 Like, come on, I want to fucking leak that. Taste the poom poon.
Taste that. The poon poon is so.

Speaker 1 And then they do, and that lady comes so hard. And they're like, oh, this made all my problems go away.
I gratified. Well, I guess they're probably

Speaker 1 primed up, though, because they've been in a dance hall all night, just like frankly daggering them. And then, you know, all you got to do is touch that thing by the end of the night.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's probably pushed to start by the end of the night.

Speaker 1 You daggered your wife for like six hours in a dance hall. All you got to do is just like pull her pants down.
The breeze is going to do the rest of them.

Speaker 1 Blow a kiss at it. She falls to her knees.

Speaker 1 If I was daggering my wife for six hours, she'd have to go to the hospital.

Speaker 1 Her hips would explode.

Speaker 1 This episode is brought to you by Zip Recruiter. Matt, I'm constantly looking for car keys, phone, chapstick, glasses, headphones.
There you go. And I lose them all the time.

Speaker 1 That's why I use wired headphones now. Ooh.

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Someone I have a hard time shopping for. I have a tough time finding Le Maire gifts.
Really?

Speaker 1 And I like to spoil him.

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Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm actually, I'm going to be in the islands on a couple days. I'm heading to Turks and Caicos.
Nice.

Speaker 1 I might dagger. I might dagger.

Speaker 1 I might dagger. Yeah.
You can't dagger on red, bro. Huh? No daggering on the red.
No, I think we're off. I think the

Speaker 1 daggered her on red, they're so horny when that's going down. True.
You're probably going to make her fucking ears fall off of her head. True.
You would have seen like a fine red mist.

Speaker 1 She just turns to a cloud of steam.

Speaker 1 That's the pink mist right there.

Speaker 1 That's cool. I'm glad you're going down there.
I know. I'm excited, bro.
I can't wait. Wednesday, yeah, we're all heading down.
The whole fan man is going to be very sick. Very sick.

Speaker 1 I can't wait, dude. That's

Speaker 1 why I'm going to lay in the ocean and just try to see if it'll take me away.

Speaker 1 You're going to write weird, like, mariner poetry while you're there.

Speaker 1 Dude, you'd be a sick castaway. Like, Tom Hanks, you'd be sick at that.
Oh, you would solve that problem immediately.

Speaker 1 I would have put a girl wig. I was kind of gay.
You had a dude wig on the volleyball or like a dude hair on the volleyball. That would have been a beautiful woman's face, the volleyball.

Speaker 1 Also, that volleyball's face would have been wrecked after like two weeks.

Speaker 1 I've been fucking my buddy.

Speaker 1 I love fucking my poem. Can you imagine seeing it on the fucking volleyball?

Speaker 1 LaMay.

Speaker 1 I don't like when it's reasonable.

Speaker 1 Fucking the volleyball from behind.

Speaker 1 Daggering the volleyball. Dude, I, for real, I've flirted with the idea now of getting a totally virtual road setup where it's like Oculus, fleshlight, and just going

Speaker 1 on the road.

Speaker 1 Do you want to enter the matrix? I don't know. I don't think so.
I don't think I can pull the trigger, but it's something I've been

Speaker 1 something I've been. That's your bug out bag, bro.

Speaker 1 You

Speaker 1 a chamber in the garage i was

Speaker 1 i was telling somebody this weekend i want to get a separate uh just a separate like suitcase that's just like a torso and an oculus

Speaker 1 buy to see on the plane

Speaker 1 me and the misses are going on a trip

Speaker 1 buy your seat for the torso on a plane have you ever stumbled across a torso in your buddy's house never realized that bro i did

Speaker 1 it changed our relationship forever

Speaker 1 i was like dude this is what you're up to? And he's like, that's not what I'm all about, man. It's not my whole thing.
They're never life-size either. They're always a little too small.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's exactly tiny hineys, bro. Tiny hinies.
That's what I heard. I heard they're tiny hineys, man.
I got a BBL hine.

Speaker 1 True. I would like a big, noisy one.

Speaker 1 You got a what? BBL hiney. No, I don't have a lot of

Speaker 1 you would think. Yeah.
Dude, beach bombs.

Speaker 1 Huge ones on the kitchen counter.

Speaker 1 Put a flower in the

Speaker 1 basement.

Speaker 1 There you go. You need that, man.

Speaker 1 Dude, I'm the hell.

Speaker 1 You don't need that, dude. I don't need it.
I don't want to do it, but it's

Speaker 1 a briefcase, though. True.

Speaker 1 Just be all business about it.

Speaker 1 Like a rifle, for instance. You should get one that's the exact same dimensions as your wife.
And then anytime you argue, you're like, you know what?

Speaker 1 I don't need you. Britney too.

Speaker 1 Me too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I got to go to Britney Trump real quick.

Speaker 1 True.

Speaker 1 Just old home videos.

Speaker 1 I'm not cheating, honey. Just videos of us dancing.

Speaker 1 Got a groan out of Josh. We're your business, dude.

Speaker 1 Josh Cabonza, as always, thank you for that.

Speaker 1 I am in a wicked mood right now.

Speaker 1 I'm in a good mood. I'm a very cranky mood, too, but a nice bro pulled up to me at the red light and was like, guard dog.
I was like, yo, what's up?

Speaker 1 And I had a solid three-minute conversation with him through the window. That's all.
He's like, where are you guys podcasting? And I was like, I've almost almost told him our exact location

Speaker 1 the location's been blind yeah i've seen so many bros outside i've been like i do a podcast right in here yeah i do i did that today too he was a good bro shout out to him yeah so there are i do i do encounter a lot of good bros in the wild dude there's a lot of just whipped up right next to me i was at a place uh recently in austin where we're like in line like waiting for a drink and it was just a bro talking like oh you know love the cast and we just talked like for like five solid minutes while we're waiting and it was it really was it felt like i was just talking to an old buddy yeah just having a good time chatting around.

Speaker 1 It was really nice. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I like that. You know, not at all.
I like it too. Rarely ever is it a punisher.
Every now and again, you get a punisher, and you get a punisher, please. But it's always, it's a hammer.

Speaker 1 It's just a blacked out guy. Sean got punished in Tempe.
I got in Tempe.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 I got punished in

Speaker 1 Salt Lake.

Speaker 1 He deserved to be punished. Yeah, he was a beautiful man, and he was so not like

Speaker 1 spiritually, he was a beautiful man. He was a little bit too drunk.
And he came to both shows, sat right in the front.

Speaker 1 And I just kept taking away his ends when he would say weird stuff.

Speaker 1 Take away his pellets. Shout out to Jeremy.
I hope Jeremy. Jeremy, I love you, man.
You know I love you. Yeah, man.
Just had a little bit too much to drink. That's always the booze.
The booze is home.

Speaker 1 That's when they tip over.

Speaker 1 I was at the last show in Rhode Island. There was this bro in the front row, and he was just chilling, like rocking jean shorts.
And

Speaker 1 he was just having so much fun. He wasn't trying to be a dickhead.
He just couldn't, he just wouldn't stop trying to get the interaction going.

Speaker 1 And it was like the security came up to him and he genuinely was like what's going on i'm like bro they're gonna kick you out and he was like why he's like i've never been to a comedy show before i'm having the most he was having so much fun i think i'm winning the comedy show right now can you stop doing the worm

Speaker 1 yeah he was having a good time he chilled though he really i was like there's i have zero faith and you're not going to get kicked out i hope you don't and i you know i was like please please don't kick give him one more shot Jeremy would chill too, but then I would bother him and then I would bring him right back into it.

Speaker 1 That often happens too, where if I'm like, if it starts to suffer, I'll be like, yeah, you'd be a fucking asshole and just fire him back up. Like, yo, man, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 Have some respect for life comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Jeremy saved me on the second show. I brought him up on stage and we took a bout together.

Speaker 1 That's all. I talked him for like 30 minutes.

Speaker 1 Whoa. You're filling the time, huh? Yeah, I'd love it.
Yeah, it would have been 30. Yeah, it would have been a 20-minute set.

Speaker 1 I'm also furious right now. What's wrong? I mean, just, you know, being married to a strong woman has its pitfalls.
And navigating that minefield.

Speaker 1 My wife's like ISIS, so she hates the books in our house. And she destroyed my favorite painting on accident.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so she's just trying to fucking burn the libraries and the museums. And I was like, oh, so this was the one you accidentally destroyed as you're putting together an end table?

Speaker 1 How did it wind up exactly where you're building the end table? And she's like, well, it shouldn't have been on the ground.

Speaker 1 Oh, yes, it shouldn't have been on the ground. You should have moved it if you cared.

Speaker 1 Can I ask you a question? Does she have any of her crap on the ground? And by chance, you ever tell her to pick that up? And does she spazz if you do?

Speaker 1 Just curiously.

Speaker 1 Just a question. Just a question.
How long has the Sephora bag been on the stairs, honey?

Speaker 1 It's actually a tripping hazard, by the way.

Speaker 1 It's a fucking tripping hazard. Oh, yeah, I love logic.

Speaker 1 Try to get reasonable with them.

Speaker 1 The last message of a desperate man.

Speaker 1 The points of egress are blocked.

Speaker 1 You're carrying them an OSHA sign.

Speaker 1 It is pathetic, man, when you start to be like, I got to win this argument. You're like, this is a fire hazard.

Speaker 1 You're trying to kill us.

Speaker 1 You want us to die.

Speaker 1 I do say, I think there is something very beautiful. I was on the way over here.
I might be a country music guy, by the way. Just on the ride over here, I was like...
I like it too.

Speaker 1 I might just be, I was sitting here driving, and I was puffing my cigar now, just being like, puffing a nice little cigar.

Speaker 1 A little soggy, dude.

Speaker 1 I'm an old man now. I've given it.
I'm like, dude, I'm just an old man now. I just need to tastefully deteriorate now and just kind of become gay.
Become gay.

Speaker 1 You got to get a chair.

Speaker 1 You got to get a chair. I know.
I do. I do.

Speaker 1 I got my sight set on a rocking chair. My dad's got it pretty much figured out.
He has portable rocking chairs. My dad has the same chair.
Oh, dude. I think they just think about dudes.

Speaker 1 I think they sit over there and just like, fuck you.

Speaker 1 That guy who dropped off that dumpster today looks so hot, dude.

Speaker 1 Guy who dropped off that 30-yarder. My God, whatever the fucking goddess that guy was.

Speaker 1 Who's your porch and

Speaker 1 garage hang? Like, who's that? My garage is so hot that I would die.

Speaker 1 But what do you say? Like your hang. Who would you hang out with on the porch, like in the rocking chairs with you? My goddamn self.

Speaker 1 Anyone, anyone who wants to hang out? No partners. I'm pretty lonely, dude.
Anyone who wants to hang out, they're welcome to come hang out.

Speaker 1 Bro,

Speaker 1 I feel you. I'm not.

Speaker 1 I sat in my backyard at the new house in Michigan for like four hours yesterday. Oh, yeah, you moved.
I moved to Detroit, yeah. Outside of Detroit.
Wow. Wow, wow.
Hey, shut up.

Speaker 1 Oh, wait. What are you doing?

Speaker 1 Time stamps.

Speaker 1 Oh, my bad. Well, you psycho.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 I get it. You're getting 100%.

Speaker 1 No, I appreciate it. Well, I do.
There is like this whole like stolen valor thing about saying you live in Detroit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Anyway, so that's why I pointed at Le Maire. I didn't point it you so you could say the exact address of where I've desperately been trying to hide from the dead-eyed ghouls.

Speaker 1 Dude, did you meet the black squirrels yet? Oh, have I met the black squirrels? The black squirrels rule. They're my only friends, LeBron.

Speaker 1 I sit surrounded by black-eyed Susans and consider where I'm going to put the hot tub. And there's just black-eyed squirrels, but their flesh is falling off their bodies.
What?

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's like long, like missing fur straps on these black squirrels. Oh, they're fighting.
They fight. The black squirrels fight.
They're meeting. You don't say.

Speaker 1 You know, they're only about 30% of the black crime squirrel statistics. Where do you hear that?

Speaker 1 Did you see that on the TV, Chief?

Speaker 1 That's Trump propaganda, LaMan. I'm going to tell you the black squirrels are fighting.
Trump group. They have less resources.

Speaker 1 The black squirrels eat ribs.

Speaker 1 I just tell you what I've seen. I've seen them, man.
The black squirrels, they get around, man. I've seen those guys in action.
Pretty awesome. But the loneliness of,

Speaker 1 you know, being mildly successful.

Speaker 1 I wish I had nothing and I was still sleeping in a house with 16 people. Those were the days.
Yeah, true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there was a certain loneliness being mildly successful too, because it's just like it's just you hanging out. You're like, damn, I have made a decent amount of money, right?

Speaker 1 But not enough for like, you know, the Jonah brothers to be like, come hang out,

Speaker 1 or for you to even know their names.

Speaker 1 Oh, you mean Fred Jonah? Can I give you a lonely guy tip on vacation? Yeah, because I just went to Cyprus with my wife for a week, and I like,

Speaker 1 I was with her, and it was great. But then day two, I saw this guy at the buffet who was doing crazy stuff with Halloumi, that like cheese.
And I went up and I was like, what are you doing?

Speaker 1 And he walked me through his process for like grilling Halloumi. And then I'd see that guy out.
And by day three, at breakfast, we ended up hanging out. Like, I made a vacation friend.
That's awesome.

Speaker 1 And I think that's going to be important for you. Oh, yeah.
Because, you know, you can fuck off and just go sit in the water, but you got your beautiful daughters. They're going to occupy you.

Speaker 1 Once they go to bed, you can hang out with your old lady. But if you can bring in another couple,

Speaker 1 not in like a sexual way. I know.
I trust me. I know.
We've done vacation. Vacation friends are really fun.
Because you're never going to see them again.

Speaker 1 So you tell them everything about yourself, and then they do the same. And then you're like, all right, dude, enjoy life in Ecuador.
Yeah, like we'll hang out.

Speaker 1 If you're ever, you know, and you just, yeah, you'd never see him again. I'd never want to see you again.
Vacation friends do rule, though. It is fun to meet vacation friends.

Speaker 1 And I think we'll probably meet some. And it's an island, too.
So I like can really get down on the island.

Speaker 1 I got a real island vibe. I had my first kiss in Texas.

Speaker 1 You had your first kiss in Turks and Cecil? Yeah, I had one. Vacation friends.
What was his name? Oh, Sam.

Speaker 1 Don't put it on the T unless you don't want me to whack it over the the fence.

Speaker 1 How, so, how did it go down? You were just like on the resort. Did you ever see, by the way? Could have been 16 or 17.
So you were like the kid from

Speaker 1 that. I was going into high school.
What's that show on HBO? It has two seasons. It's always like,

Speaker 1 you were like the dude from White. Did you see that episode of White Loader? That season of White Loaders, the little brother? The horny little brother is always jerking off.
And his sister's like,

Speaker 1 I was gooning. And then I found love.

Speaker 1 I found love with a lovely lady that was from New Jersey, like I was. What? So we bonded over that.
And smelted on you.

Speaker 1 We shared a kiss in a Turks and Quaikos, and

Speaker 1 now she's a lesbian MMA fighter.

Speaker 1 That's awesome, bro. You flipped her.
Yeah, I flipped her. She is a beast.
Yeah, she's filled with feminine rage. I think she's just waiting for you.
Yeah. Maybe.

Speaker 1 True, you gotta take it. Can I come with you? You gotta get her out of the octagon.
You gotta take her out of the octagon.

Speaker 1 Put her in the kitchen. Put her in the coctagon.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was just a little.

Speaker 1 I forgot about that. What percentage of female UFC fighters do you think are lesbians? At least half.
30? 30%? 30, dude. But there's some that are so beautiful.
Muscle mommies.

Speaker 1 Man, dude, did you see Dumont? Tabitha Ritchie is so beautiful. Dumont? She's a beautiful muscle mommy? Yeah.
Brazilian, beautiful muscle mommy. Tabitha Richie.
She's pretty tight.

Speaker 1 They might not even be lesbians. Just men are afraid to fuck them.
That's true. Not me.
Not you, no. You're not afraid of anything.
You and LeMaire are very adventurous. Yeah, we're not scared.
No.

Speaker 1 Tabitha Richie is she's beautiful. Shout out to her.
Huh, the divine feminine. And then Alexa Grasso, she lost this weekend.
She's pretty beautiful. I think they're hotter when they lose, honestly.

Speaker 1 Was that lady who lost the one who had a fucking pussy wound on her forehead? That was a different lady.

Speaker 1 That was the Dumong match. The elder girl.
The red French girl. The French lady.
Come on, man. Damn, okay.
She's not French. She's pretty.
Donna got the cut. Do these ladies get like CTE? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, they probably already have. They're starting it up.

Speaker 1 Have you seen anything?

Speaker 1 they're down 49

Speaker 1 yo the cut this this the cut this lady had was crazy

Speaker 1 and they were in the spears

Speaker 1 dude

Speaker 1 irene alley

Speaker 1 she catch an elbow or is that like a no they headbutt it and then the lady she was fighting just kept fucking her up I can't believe the other ladies scratched her that bad.

Speaker 1 I'm just being nasty. I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.

Speaker 1 I'm kidding. Those guys are athletes, bro.

Speaker 1 That's like the physical manifestation of when I confront my wife with logic.

Speaker 1 That's what it does to her forehead. It splits open and it opens up like a mouth and it swallows me.

Speaker 1 It is tight. It is good, though.
I think there is something to be said about just like, you know, confronting, um, confronting the feminine over time. Dude, we used to be able to hit them.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, that was the thing we used to say. Shut up,

Speaker 1 LeMaire. Historically, you are accurate.

Speaker 1 Now, I just want to drive your...

Speaker 1 What are you trying to say?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I mean, here's the thing. Here's the thing.

Speaker 1 I mean, no times.

Speaker 1 Yes. Dude, Sean Connery was like on record and shit.

Speaker 1 Slap. Yeah.
You slapper. It gets to a point where they won't listen to reason.
Yeah. Yeah, they point when they're born.
And it's like, you know, the problem. Here's the thing.

Speaker 1 You obviously can't do that. And it's a shame because I think a lot of bad guys ruin that for a reason.

Speaker 1 With great power comes great responsibility.

Speaker 1 I mean, again,

Speaker 1 there are those dudes that do that. They get a girlfriend and they like slowly are like, give me your cell phone.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
And they just like trap a lady in an apartment.

Speaker 1 It's like, yeah, those guys are definitely burning hell. But a tasteful gentleman like Sean Connery, just like putting down a cognac glass and be like, shut up.

Speaker 1 Doing it with a velvet glove.

Speaker 1 Sometimes you have to slap them.

Speaker 1 They're tricky. They are tricky.
I'll give you that. They are tricky little vixens, man.

Speaker 1 Tricky little things.

Speaker 1 I always try to understand, man. It is weird.

Speaker 1 But those are wild, bro. We're joking, right? But if you ever meet a guy who hit a girl, they have a different type of darkness to them.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Like a guy who actually would hit a woman, you're like, dude, chill out, bro.

Speaker 1 I do think that happens. You get the tap-out tattooed and the tears in your body.

Speaker 1 No fear shirt on.

Speaker 1 Because I feel like I, and look, I've never really considered it, but I think that if you break the seal on that, if you hit them once, she's then going to retaliate. My wife would retaliate.

Speaker 1 For sure. And then I'm not going to hit her again.
I'm going to be so fucking, you know, it's like when the bomb goes off in the bunker and you just hear like that buzzing noise.

Speaker 1 That's me after hitting her. And then a barrage of blows land upon me.
I undefend them. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's like, take me. Yeah.
It's like, I earned this.

Speaker 1 Just do it. I'm sorry.
I bet that that fucking makeup sex is wild. Yeah, man.
After beating the shit out of me. That's why you do it, though.

Speaker 1 All right. That's why you do it.
Okay. Well, that's like, it'll be, make them appreciate, dude.
It's, I don't know. It's bad.

Speaker 1 No, you're talking about very dark corners of the female psyche that, you know, it's like you don't, in play conversation, you're not supposed to talk about.

Speaker 1 And again, not advising anybody to do that. Please.
No, no. It's one of the worst things you can do.

Speaker 1 Literally, it is the worst thing you can do. Criming is the child's worst.
What is it? Criming is the child's worst. Yes, sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Good work, LeMaire. Look where we are.
I'm sorry, guys.

Speaker 1 I've been listening to a lot of Patrice O'Meal recently. Oh, yeah.
You came into the green room last night, fired up on Patrice.

Speaker 1 I was like, all right, rumble, young man, rumble. I'll let you have the space.

Speaker 1 Definitely standing for the record. I mean, we are just doing freedom of speech and exploring darker corners of mind.

Speaker 1 We're on the cutting edge, but yes, it is a horrible crime to commit against any ladies.

Speaker 1 It's good that we don't do it. I just wish they'd show some appreciation for the fact that we stopped beating the fuck out of them.

Speaker 1 They seem to be a little cocky these days.

Speaker 1 I love video games, and I've broken a controller for every console I've ever had, you know. And I love video games.

Speaker 1 I love video games.

Speaker 1 I'm not hitting you at all.

Speaker 1 Your analogy is.

Speaker 1 That might be one of your best analogies.

Speaker 1 I wish we could frame this moment.

Speaker 1 But that also made me think that you do like playing fighting games as the women characters. So maybe that's why this is in your head.
That's interesting, actually.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 If I'm going to look at a character, I got to see an ass.

Speaker 1 True. I mean, you are about to jerk off every dog playing video games.
You might as well prime yourself. Nothing's better than jerking off after you win at video games.

Speaker 1 There's nothing better than that. Spoils of war.
There's nothing better than that, dude. You have a good day of NBA 2K, you're like,

Speaker 1 I gotta be,

Speaker 1 I gotta go to the battery. I gotta come down.
Pardon me. You're gonna go to battle buttons.

Speaker 1 Your parents come in, you're like, get out. I earned this, dude.

Speaker 1 You see that trophy on the screen? I earned that. This is my space.
See that digital confetti? You're spilling things.

Speaker 1 Yeah, your parents just hear flawless victory.

Speaker 1 Okay, don't knock on the door.

Speaker 1 Let them have this.

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Speaker 1 What have you guys been up to? I haven't seen you guys in a while. I've been a traveling, rambling man.
I think you guys have been as well.

Speaker 1 You've been moving around. Charles' moving around.

Speaker 1 I've just been here recently. Oh, really?

Speaker 1 How was your P-Day party, bro? It was nice. It was cool.
It was fun.

Speaker 1 It was nice. We just hang out.
We barbecued. My brother grilled.
He put on some ribs. Yeah, that was good.
That was awesome. Swam.
It was a good time. Yeah, we swam.

Speaker 1 What did we do? I can't even really remember. We were on a chill vibe.
Drank the whole week? Yeah, we drank the whole vibe.

Speaker 1 Did you join your birthday a week? Yeah. Are you a birthday a week guy?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 How old were you turning, if you don't mind? 34. Ooh, that's nice.
That's nice. Right.

Speaker 1 Time to give it up. For your 30th, I got.
Remember, we got

Speaker 1 what the fuck, dude. We set this up and I thought it was going to pay off so much harder.

Speaker 1 That was pretty great, actually. Were you drinking out of the rig?

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I really thought he was just ripping that.

Speaker 1 I thought that was your new thing. I was supportive of it.
I was just going, man, that really took me by surprise.

Speaker 1 That's awesome. Before you got here, he was poking holes in it.
I was like, Are you making a water bottle? And he says, No, and then he just squared it in, and we were like, Okay,

Speaker 1 save this for about 40 minutes in because they're going to think you're so strong that you just squeezed water through the lid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's pretty sick. I just call you.

Speaker 1 That does seem kind of nice. ASMR.
Although I'm just, I'm just a gay old man.

Speaker 1 I don't know why. I love that.

Speaker 1 Dude, I've been hitting it.

Speaker 1 I'm off porn, but I'm back on. Okay.
Like I'm off, like, I've deleted my bad Reddit and I've deleted my OnlyFans, but I still have my Twitter list. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 So I'm like off, but I'm still, and I've been, I don't know.

Speaker 1 What was the OnlyFans tab before you get in? What do you mean?

Speaker 1 How much was a month? It wasn't much.

Speaker 1 How much of an allowance were you giving the girls? I was giving myself like $30 a month. Yeah, that's not bad for today.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you feel like it was worth it for 30 bucks? And I'm not, again,

Speaker 1 I'm not being one of those guys like, oh, never pay for that. No, that's.
I've thought about it several times. My credit cards are monitored.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 if it's a girl who posts frequently and it's the stuff you like and it's like $5, it's worth it. For sure.
But there's some girls who post infrequently and then it's like $15 and it's like,

Speaker 1 come on. True.

Speaker 1 You start hitting them like, where are I?

Speaker 1 I put a roof over your fucking head. And I hate it.
I got rid of OnlyFans because all the girls, they all messaged you the same thing.

Speaker 1 They're like, send me a picture of your cock so I can give you a dick rating for free. And it's like, no, I don't.
That's the last thing I want. Yeah, no.

Speaker 1 And then you say, send me a picture of your cock.

Speaker 1 You first.

Speaker 1 How's it feel to be free of the OnlyFans?

Speaker 1 It's nice. It's nice.
But I could still get got, not by OnlyFans, but like real life.

Speaker 1 How so? I don't know. You know, you just see, you just see a lady.
Yeah. Sometimes you get sent to your knees, dude.
Yeah. True.
It's tough out here, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we were actually,

Speaker 1 where the fuck was I? I was somewhere.

Speaker 1 I don't remember the exact place, but I was there. Me and Brittany came with me.
We're at a show afterwards and we're at like a bar. And there was like for sure a prostitute sitting next to us.

Speaker 1 Like in like a fishnet dress, basically.

Speaker 1 Supple young lady.

Speaker 1 And yeah, it was pretty funny, man. She was just sitting there.
And like,

Speaker 1 women love seeing prostitutes, by the way. Brittany was like, fucking, like, I think she's a prostitute.
Yeah, she is. Get out of the way.

Speaker 1 Let's switch scenes.

Speaker 1 Let me protect you.

Speaker 1 Give me the shield on.

Speaker 1 No, it was very funny. She was a hooker.
I was like, yeah, I think she was. Duh.

Speaker 1 Where the fuck? Dude, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to globetrot everybody.
I don't remember what

Speaker 1 I was doing. I was just in Tempe, and they have some of the finest snow bunnies I've ever seen.
Tempe's snow bunny heaven, man. Apparently, that's where they are.
If it ain't snowing, I ain't going.

Speaker 1 Dude, have you heard? Salt Lake has good snow bunnies too, but the Mormons were crazy. I like the Samoans the best, though.
Samoans stop talking about the Samormans. They're all Mormons.

Speaker 1 They're tier one Mormons. There's some Mormons? Sam Mormons, yeah.
Oh, they're numerous, dude. Whoa.
Because they're sharing out to Hawaii and Tonga and Samoa and they planted those seeds.

Speaker 1 And now that's why BYU and Utah have the best offensive lines.

Speaker 1 I get it for the program. I kept doing another funny joke at the Mormons and the Samoans bonded over their mutual love of pineapples.

Speaker 1 That was one of my funny jokes from my funny joke show, too. That was one of the funny ones.

Speaker 1 Sean will hit me up on the road and be like, where are you? And I'll tell him, and then he'll be like,

Speaker 1 I hate it here. And I'm like, what, dude? You're living the dream.
You're out there. You're moving tickets.
I was happy this weekend. Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 1 I'm so proud of you. Thank you.
And I think a lot of people are. And I think you need to reflect on what's going on for yourself.
I'm trying to be. I was in a funk for a while.

Speaker 1 It's cool cool to be mired in doom and gloom as a young man. I understand that.
But once you break through that and you realize that every moment's a gift, you're going to live a lot richer life.

Speaker 1 I'm getting there. Yeah, dude, you're about to be 30.
Grow up. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You got to shave your fuse.

Speaker 1 Damn, sorry. Damn, La Mer.

Speaker 1 Yeah, what's weird too, especially when you start fart, excuse me, when you start headlining. It's hilarious.
It's a comedy show.

Speaker 1 When you start headlining, there is that weird, like, it's like a crazy loneliness to go from doing a show to go back in your hotel room alone.

Speaker 1 You feel like, oh, Josh, man, this is where you're the fucking best, bro.

Speaker 1 It is weird to go from being around hundreds of people to just sitting in a hotel room by yourself. Feels crazy.

Speaker 1 People who are screaming your name and losing it, and then you do the merch line afterward, and they're also stoked, and they tell you how, you know,

Speaker 1 how the impact their shit's made on their life. Then you just go back to that room and you're like, okay,

Speaker 1 what do I do now? Time to watch. Besides self-harm.

Speaker 1 Times watch Comics Unleashed. Yeah, dude.
Oh, Mario Cantone's back.

Speaker 1 Every time I sit there and I just eventually fall into just like studying various rap beefs. Like I'll watch a video

Speaker 1 for three hours about like young thugs' beefs before he... Dude, that trial is so fucking funny.
Have you seen any of the compilations? He's going to get off. I think he will.

Speaker 1 Did you see Little Woody?

Speaker 1 No, the guy who doesn't snitch? Yes.

Speaker 1 Oh, he snitched. He's,

Speaker 1 dude,

Speaker 1 I was on Butterly's podcast recently, and he was like playing clips.

Speaker 1 It's funny as fuck. But I started like, that was like fresh in my mind.
So I started looking at the guy, Little Woody, and like, dude, they're impossible to interrogate.

Speaker 1 Because they'll just be like, they'll be asked a question and they'll be like, well, I'm a liar. So anything I tell you, anything I said before was probably a lie.

Speaker 1 But so I can tell you, I'll tell you something, but it might be a lie. That way they're not perjuring themselves.
They say they they are a lie, it's crazy. That rules.

Speaker 1 Dude, you have like DAs or prosecutors trying to like crush these guys. And it's just like.
But wait. I feel like I'm watching.
If I was in the jury, I'd be like, this guy's winning. Did they sign?

Speaker 1 Did they like do the Bible thing? The oath? Yeah, but

Speaker 1 Little Woody had immunity. So he couldn't get in trouble for anything.
They wanted him to go testify because he was originally saying, pinning everything on

Speaker 1 Young Thug. But then he said, he goes, yeah, that's just because I wanted to get out of trouble.
He's like, so so yes, I did testify saying he did those stuff, but I did lie.

Speaker 1 And I already went to jail, and he can't, I have immunity, so I can't get in trouble for it. Wow, dude's kind of a legal genius.
It's like reverse Socratic logic. It's great, dude.
It's crazy, man.

Speaker 1 And he'll like, and they'll like keep firing him up. And they'll be like, what does a, why'd you shrug your shoulders? I'd be like, because they're my shoulders.

Speaker 1 You can't argue. He's like, yes, they are your shoulders.
It's like, what does 357 mean? He goes, numbers. Is it a gang? He's like, I don't know.

Speaker 1 If you think it is, it might be, but I don't think it is. It might be.
Who knows?

Speaker 1 It's like, it's true.

Speaker 1 It might might be a gang. It's like quicksand.
Dude, these guys, it's impossible to nail these dudes down. It's so funny.

Speaker 1 And as soon as you do kind of get them, they'll literally be like, Why are you being on negative, man? I don't want to be thinking about all this shit.

Speaker 1 You're so greedy. So, man, I hope this.
I wish this guy the best. I hope Lil Woody has a

Speaker 1 just gets out. This puts us all behind.

Speaker 1 That's how you fill the hours of your night, Sean. Watch.
Get to the bottom of Lil Woody.

Speaker 1 Is it Woody and not Woody? It's Woody. Little Woody.
Yeah. Yeah, it's not Woody.
Lil Woody? He's not from the 504.

Speaker 1 Although, yeah, Young Thug did have a significant beef with Lil Wayne, which he went to the Magnolia area and also got booed, but that's why I'm not.

Speaker 1 Lil Wayne is mad that Kendrick is doing the halftime show. I know.
Birdman said that's in BS. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I kind of agree. I think so too.
I would say

Speaker 1 halftime show. It would be nice, but they don't really do rappers.
They're having Kendrick Lamar. You're fucking Kendrick Lamar, dude.
Kendrick Lamar is like the first rapper.

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Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, who did it last? That's the weekend.

Speaker 1 The weekend's not a wrap. 50 cent and all like Eminem and all those.
They have the expendables of rap.

Speaker 1 They had the expendables of rap there. It was Royce the 5'9 in the game.

Speaker 1 It was a shady aftermath Super Bowl, but that was like three years ago. Okay, well, dude.
But rap doesn't happen often. It doesn't happen often.
It doesn't. It doesn't.
Well, you know, now it's.

Speaker 1 Kendrick Mamar was on that one, too. He was on that one.

Speaker 1 The

Speaker 1 Black Avenger Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 And Eminem. True.

Speaker 1 It's not common, but it is. I think it'll become more and more.

Speaker 1 It's because Jay-Z runs it now. He picks all the Super Bowl stuff.
Right, I forgot he became like the official because it's Apple Music.

Speaker 1 Well, the NFL was racist, and they paid Jay-Z to be their official black guy. And it all went away.
It's all forgiven. Just like HM.
Just like Papa John.

Speaker 1 And yes, Jack with Papa John. It's a classic.
When are you going to get the racist apologist bag? You could definitely get that.

Speaker 1 Me? Yeah,

Speaker 1 if some big... corporation goes down jump in and be like guys i can make this all right i'll smooth this over for you

Speaker 1 because what is jay-z his his position is like a like a liaison Yeah, he's definitely just a liaison. He's like black culture liaison.
No, I think that is a fixer for the streets.

Speaker 1 Because that's the big thing.

Speaker 1 But I do think, what did they give him? Is it like an ownership type position or is it like well, in what HM or like in

Speaker 1 the NFL? What is it?

Speaker 1 I think in the NFL, he might have a stake. He might have a small share in that.
I think. That's pretty nice.
Probably in some team now. He's like the black union boss.

Speaker 1 He's like, get these guys in line.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's the Pinkerton, but not pink.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was... Nobody's kneeling right now, right? No, kneeling.
Kneeling's over. Kneeling's done.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Taylor Swift fixed everything.
Black people are done kneeling. We're standing up now.
True. Can I tell you, you guys thought about this? You know, Tua?

Speaker 1 Quarterback?

Speaker 1 DeMar Hamlin. So, DeMar Hamlin lived.
Talk to him. I was like, talking about the lady.
I was like, have you guys heard about this?

Speaker 1 You seen this? You heard about this?

Speaker 1 Can you believe it? Talk Tua.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a guy who just got knocked out, right? Yeah, so Tua's brain was put in the paint shaker by a guy who died on the field.

Speaker 1 So that guy lived to kill Tua. Yeah.
This is a strange, strange cosmic coincidence. Yeah, a bit of a Highlander situation.
Yes, indeed. Took a soul.
Why did he?

Speaker 1 I saw him lower his head and it was like, dude, what do you do? I mean, you know, obviously a beast move. That's how I play Madden, but it's like,

Speaker 1 why did he have to do that, man? He fully just like, no reason, already had the first first down. He went Hawaiian battering ram.
He did. Yeah.
He did. He was like the Dole Corporation on the islands.

Speaker 1 That's crazy.

Speaker 1 He was fucked, bro. He came up public.
What's his status? Is he all right now? I think he's going to have to retire.

Speaker 1 I was talking Soder because he knows the head coach of the Dolphins, and he's like, it's not looking good.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That sucks, bro.
I mean, they changed the concussion protocol because he got two in one game last year.

Speaker 1 And then they're like, oh, it's fine. And now he's out there.
And

Speaker 1 it's a bad state of affairs.

Speaker 1 What What if we fixed every player to bumper car strings? Love it. That way they kind of like we could pull back a little bit.

Speaker 1 Or yeah, like attach a tether from the back of their head to their shoulder pads so they can't lower their head. True.
You try to lower your head. It just yanks you back up.
I think we've.

Speaker 1 Shock collars, maybe. Yeah, maybe like knights' armor.
Maybe like stiff metal armor.

Speaker 1 Mech suits would be great. Mech suits would be awesome.
Mech suit football would rule. Finally, the Japanese can have a place in the game.

Speaker 1 There's a kicker on the Falcons, but that's about it. Dude, the Tokyo Gundams would fuck everybody up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that guy's done, though.

Speaker 1 And it's brain. Usually it's like knee or this.
It's like, dude, fucking, that sucks, dude. Yeah, he doesn't know colors.
He was great.

Speaker 1 He was starting for one of the most explosive offenses in the game. Yeah.
It's a shame. I hope he makes it back.
I mean, that point, what do you think?

Speaker 1 I do too, because I took the over on total yardage for the year.

Speaker 1 I was like, he's going for over 3,500.

Speaker 1 So you think he'll really retire now? I think. I hope so.

Speaker 1 And he can retire and go to Hawaii and coach high school football and be a king for the rest of his life. That's true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and it's not like, again, what took him out is playing like an absolute beast.

Speaker 1 He would get ruined by all those other Samoans, though. They'd be like, you go to the NFL and you quit because of your head? Because Samoans have hard heads.
Yeah. Well, but he's Hawaiian.

Speaker 1 You gotta... There's a whole scene over there.
They're different? You know the easiest way to get your ass kicked by a Samoan? Call him a Tongan. Oh, no, I would never.

Speaker 1 Or tell them that their cookies are banging, dude.

Speaker 1 Those cookies are banging, dude. I can't believe you gave those to the Girl Scout cookie.
Why can't I get those year-round, player?

Speaker 1 They changed the name of those things, by the way. They're called like Caramel Delights.
Now they named them after Puerto Ricans.

Speaker 1 I think it's location-based. Regionally, in some places, it's still Samoa on the box.
Really? Yeah. I didn't know that.
Yeah. You think that might be, you might be getting some swaggy girl scouts.

Speaker 1 It might be like the old

Speaker 1 bitties. That's like last year's outdoors, dude.
I think you're getting like some really old weed. You're getting fucking trim.

Speaker 1 Remember getting trim back in the day, and you'd be like, I'm rich.

Speaker 1 You get a fucking trash bag full of leaf batter and it's all moldy. And you'd be like, I'm going to be smoking hash forever.
Back in the day.

Speaker 1 This was not that long ago. I had a lot of trim at one point.

Speaker 1 I had a little, I was buying dry ice from this place in South Philly, and I was just, I had these hash bags, and I would just sit in my basement and just shake. I mean, pounds and pounds of trash.

Speaker 1 It was so nice. It was the best.
But yes, it does. It did feel so sick to have like literally trash bags full.
And like, I have weed. Trash bags full of weed.
There were some nugs in there.

Speaker 1 There were some popcorn nuggets. Yeah, you'd be digging through those popcorn nugs like a black squirrel.

Speaker 1 This guy doesn't even know what he gave me. He's just crazy.
You're an idiot.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of ladybugs in this bag.

Speaker 1 That's good for you.

Speaker 1 I just remember, I would remember literally smoking like spider webs in a pipe.

Speaker 1 Like, this is free. I'm the smartest man alive.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 getting trim is so sweet, dude. Although, I will say the cursed PA medical program, man.
Don't get me started. They sell trim to patients.
Yeah, I remember that. That's rude.

Speaker 1 It's crazy, bro. And, dude, I mean, you know, God obviously has a plan because I smoked so much trim in my day.
Yeah. So I bought shake from the PA dispensary.
Shame on you guys, by the way.

Speaker 1 And it hit my lungs and I went, that's fucking trim, dude. That's not ground nug.
Yes. And I was like, motherfuckers.
And I confronted them.

Speaker 1 And they were like, well, you know, the dude literally looked at me and goes, that's just the game, dude. I'm like, get the fuck out of the game.
The game.

Speaker 1 It's acting like a fucking kingpin behind the counter. You're a state-sanctioned entity.

Speaker 1 The game.

Speaker 1 Dude, it killed me. I was just like, brother, you have no fucking idea what you're talking about.
But yeah, shame on the Pennsylvania medical marijuana.

Speaker 1 Shame, you guys are a fucking joke compared to every other state I see. Every other state's fucking chill.
Dude, in Oklahoma, you can just get a grow permit. Oklahoma rules.
Their weed's good, too.

Speaker 1 Oklahoma rules.

Speaker 1 Yeah, good weed. That used to be the scariest place to drive through with weed when I'd be driving from Denver into the greater Midwest.

Speaker 1 You go through Oklahoma and they would just have, if you had Denver, Colorado plates and you go to Oklahoma, you're getting pulled over. Yeah.
And yeah, I've had the car dumped out various times.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they'll get you.

Speaker 1 They see them plates and they say, hold on. Good thing you stick your joints in your asshole.
Well, I used to. We would fucking put them right on our taints.

Speaker 1 You'd take your bag and you'd put it on the taint and you'd sit on it. And the issue issue with that, though, is you get a half on the weeds right now smoking.

Speaker 1 Hopefully, you get a 65-year-old cop.

Speaker 1 Oh, fuck. He's definitely going to check.

Speaker 1 Nobody has to know about this.

Speaker 1 I remember getting pulled over and sitting on the weed. And then, as you're like sitting there nervous, your body temperature rises.
So all of a sudden, you're fucking making hash in your shorts.

Speaker 1 You lay an egg.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I'm glad they figured it out, though.
Dude, now, though, state of weed's crazy. Now, with the THCA, do you like, I mean, I've talked about this before.

Speaker 1 It's, it's just, it's,

Speaker 1 I don't even talk about it, but it's like,

Speaker 1 you can literally get it. You can just get weed now.
Yeah, it is. It's a THCA, and it's legally, totally, legally on board.
It's THCA. Until you light it up.

Speaker 1 Which is not illegal because THCA is not psychoactive. Yeah.
But if you subject it to the heat of a flame,

Speaker 1 interesting.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Whenever I smoke that kind kind of stuff, I don't like it.
I was in Rome and they had that THC V. Well, maybe I'm smoked tonight.
Delta 9,

Speaker 1 Delta 9, all this other stuff. Delta 8, Delta 8.
Delta 8. You ever heard of THC V 3? I hate Delta 8.

Speaker 1 No. THCV is like the more psychoactive version of THCA.
Really? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm sure it would spin me out. I had to just start smoking live rosin because it has all the terps stripped out.
But I don't think it does, though. I think live rosin.

Speaker 1 You told me that, and I thought about it. I was like, I think you might be smoking a distillate.

Speaker 1 Distillates have terp strip. Rosin keeps, and if it's live, the whole point, live, Rosin tells they kept the terps.
It's cold water. It's just cold water is all this is made from.

Speaker 1 It's pretty much just like bubble hash from back in the day. Terps intact.
But my scientist told me that there's no terps in there, and that's why I keep smoking. You're a scientist?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I have a scientist who, like, you know,

Speaker 1 he could be right himself. Yeah, he totally could be right, but I guess maybe there's less Becker.
No, it's not Becker. Becker's not a scientist.

Speaker 1 Becker was walking into these fucking dispensaries in Rome and buying, like, you know, some like.

Speaker 1 He came out literally of a fucking THCA dispensary in in Rome with his thumb just with a big ball of goo on it. And he was like, they hooked it up.

Speaker 1 They hooked it up. They couldn't put it in a bag for you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's my scientist with the booger. They gave him the booger.

Speaker 1 Like, way to go, buddy. Yeah.
That was so fucking fun. We should have asked you about your travels.
Yeah, oh, no, the travels were fun.

Speaker 1 It's just, it's great to be going on a trip with your boys to a beautiful city. And we brought the wives this time.
Yeah, nice. So we had Bitch Planet, and then we were just the fucking,

Speaker 1 a satellite of Bitch Planet.

Speaker 1 We were just a moon to them. They kept spinning.

Speaker 1 Although vacations usually, that's the highest spirits, a lady. If you take a lady in a different place, man, the spirits sore.

Speaker 1 And also, it's like, hey, ladies, we're going to go do some fucking boring shit, a.k.a. Go to a soccer game.
Yeah, but hey, we set you up with spa. We've got you spa treatment.

Speaker 1 You know, it's very easy to

Speaker 1 abandon. They need to negate their need.
True. Though I feel like they do.
They need like more. They just need to be like rubbed down and just like squeezed

Speaker 1 every so often.

Speaker 1 That will, you can really put a lady at bay if you send her into the spa, man. They love that.

Speaker 1 And if you set it up, if you thought about them and you say, hey, tomorrow at three o'clock, you're pampered. Yep.
And I can finally finish this Japanese crime novel.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they do love the spa. I mean, Vacation Bay is the best version.
The best version of me, too, I think. Maybe that's why they're doing better is because I'm better in that moment.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know. You can be a pretty nice guy sometimes.
I'll still punish you. But

Speaker 1 I've never been on a vacation. Oh, dude, it's crazy, bro.
I mean, it's

Speaker 1 imagine if you could somehow give the pussy a Mario star.

Speaker 1 It's crazy, bro. It goes, it goes just, it's nuts.
Yeah. It's like pre-breakfast.

Speaker 1 I haven't had any coffee yet.

Speaker 1 You're not going to brush your teeth?

Speaker 1 Let's go.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 it's nuts, man. I've literally looked into just becoming a coconut farmer multiple times.
Why do I live in America? I can just stay here. It's pretty nice.
I get tons of pussy all the time.

Speaker 1 Why do I live over there?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, because I love you.

Speaker 1 Great. I'm staying with her.
I'm like, I might as well just bring you here and we can just be like peasants in the Dominican Republic. Well, I guess because you're not,

Speaker 1 when you're living in the all-inclusive, it is kind of like king life. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. I'm like, let's try this place.
It's the same. It's just four restaurants are all the fucking same on the thing.

Speaker 1 You could just move to Moldova, though, or like one of these Balkan states

Speaker 1 and buy like what was once a feudal castle and you just live in there. I mean, there's just so many fucking that's my bug out bag.
Wi-Fi is bad in the castle, though.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah, that's true. That's true.
Thinking about kind of like getting hit and stuff, but yeah, yeah, yeah, but trying to tap out of the digital realm,

Speaker 1 not you. It would be funny to be in a castle like on Instagram and be like, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 Trying to go live.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think Bono lives in a castle, doesn't he?

Speaker 1 Bono for real lives in a castle next to fucking Enya. Enya lives in a castle.

Speaker 1 She never leaves.

Speaker 1 She's just fucking sealed herself in that castle. Yeah, bro.
Exactly. I think Bono has taken her down.
She doesn't have like a

Speaker 1 long, she doesn't have like a family or anything. She's just dedicated to making like wild binaural beats.

Speaker 1 She's dedicated her life to beautiful binaurals.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dude. Now check out Enya's house.
Enya has like Bono's castle sick as fuck, dude. Nice boy, Enya.
E-N-Y-A.

Speaker 1 That was tough.

Speaker 1 Enya's got a fucking nasty place, too. Look at this.
Yeah, Enya's got like a rival. You need Wi-Fi in there, LeMaire? Yes.

Speaker 1 Fair enough. She looks ghoulish.
You're just playing your Switch by like a torchlight.

Speaker 1 You're lighting candles.

Speaker 1 All of your games are like sealed with wax.

Speaker 1 You have your own stand. I'm still so bad.
You told me I had to grow up.

Speaker 1 You, of all people.

Speaker 1 I've been seething silently over it for the past. You've got lost boys over there.
I've been up there for a while. Yeah, I was cracky.
I had to get it off my chest.

Speaker 1 I was going to be so nutty to say nasty things to you, and I just bit my tongue for 20 minutes. Yeah, there's been blood running out of your mouth.

Speaker 1 I'm glad I got that on your chest. Oh, my God.
Now I can love you again like a brother. was fun to go around.
I know, I love you.

Speaker 1 I was just in Bob Flu.

Speaker 1 That was shrapnel.

Speaker 1 I've been trying to grow up. I've been trying to go on walks.
It was so depressed.

Speaker 1 I realized I was depressed for a while because I went on a walk and I left my phone at home and I was like, I've never walked around my neighborhood.

Speaker 1 And I felt like institutionalized as I was walking on this. I was like, kind of like glancing.

Speaker 1 It was really embarrassing. I was like, dude, I haven't lived like a human since I've moved here.
I've just been on my computer all day, and then I leave at night when the sun goes down.

Speaker 1 It's also been,

Speaker 1 how long have you been here now? Almost a year. Because you got here in October.
I got here in November. I was crab swirled for the first like seven months.

Speaker 1 I usually don't drink that much. I was drinking like a lot.
For me, I was drinking a lot personally when I was down to it.

Speaker 1 I was just like crushing tequila, like non-stop movement. And yeah, eventually I just was like, all right, I got to chill the fuck out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think I'm finally getting out of my swirl, which is nice. I've been trying to reduce the screen time.
Walking around the neighborhood is go outside. That's nice.

Speaker 1 I had never walked around my neighborhood once. It's so nice walking.
What's the matter with me, dude? No, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 I can see,

Speaker 1 I never took you for like a long walk guy, but it's the best. It's the best for you.
It's 50. I've been having ideas again.
I was like having zero ideas, and I was feeling like I was in such a rut.

Speaker 1 And then once I started walking, I've just been having ideas again. It's like, oh, thank God.

Speaker 1 Have you met your neighbors?

Speaker 1 I know a couple of them, but I've known a couple of them for a while. I see.
Yeah, yeah. No, I'm telling you, those walks are like, it's the best thing in the world, just taking a nice long walk.

Speaker 1 I love it. Yeah, that's my new jam.
I think that's the problem with the phone, is that it like a, it becomes easy to offload all your thoughts onto the phone. It's instant content.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I try to, I use it, I think, to have zero thoughts. Yeah, completely deadened.
I feel like it deadens, like, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm having no ideas. And yeah, you know, I'm always like, I'm doing research.
I'm going to get something out of this. I get nothing out of it.
I just stare at it.

Speaker 1 Someone told me about dopamine stacking.

Speaker 1 I would watch videos on my phone or like, you know, YouTubes, or I was watching Entourage on my phone for a while.

Speaker 1 And I would play Call of Duty.

Speaker 1 It just like

Speaker 1 listening to Entourage. Dude, I knew a guy who used to dopamine stack.
Bro, he used to Huberman's. I used to go

Speaker 1 Huberman advises against a dopamine stack? Yes. It says it just

Speaker 1 dulls your

Speaker 1 whatever the fuck. I used to go into a,

Speaker 1 you know, look, I'm pausing myself up. I'm saying, I used to go in this guy's room.
I'm selling a weed. And, dude, well, like, I would go in there to drop the sack.

Speaker 1 sack, and, like, he would, hey, you know,

Speaker 1 oh, that's crazy.

Speaker 1 Dude, he would have music on on, like, a speaker, have his, like, laptop going, and have, like, vidgas or, like, a, or a movie at the same time. And I'd always be like, God damn, dude, that is.

Speaker 1 And I never, that's a dopamine snack.

Speaker 1 Keep yourself from having any thoughts or whatever.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So I'm trying to stay away from that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're just shaking digital keys in front of you. Exactly.

Speaker 1 It was bad. And I was like, why am I so sad all the time? I don't think I think at all.

Speaker 1 We've covered that.

Speaker 1 I told you that, bro.

Speaker 1 I don't either that much, but I've been trying to. What happens when you eat a lot of mushrooms? Like, what is like the

Speaker 1 what's going on?

Speaker 1 I don't eat a lot of mushrooms. Okay.
I always go. I've never given an eighth.
Okay, that'll get your thoughts moving. Like, what happens?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 It goes straight to my shoulders, and I just have to move.

Speaker 1 It's like giving them to a dog.

Speaker 1 You just want to run around.

Speaker 1 I know that because my dog had fucking mushrooms one time, unfortunately.

Speaker 1 I could tell he just wanted to get out there and just move around. Dude, I get to zoomies.

Speaker 1 You've never had like profound, like, when you're on mushrooms.

Speaker 1 No, there was one time I got one of, I got, I had a McCusker chocolate, and I had just had to lay down with my eyes closed, and I just like visited aliens. There you go.
That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1 You have a lot of thoughts, man. Yeah, dude.
I think you're a credit. Yeah, exactly.
That's kind of my point. I think you're a very curious person.

Speaker 1 Like when my buddy came in last night, he was that physicist.

Speaker 1 You immediately hit him with, if you're a physicist, why don't I float? I was like, okay, tell me you're not having any thoughts. Get the fuck out of here, bro.

Speaker 1 Like, answer the question, sir.

Speaker 1 Right away.

Speaker 1 Why don't I?

Speaker 1 Sean, grow up.

Speaker 1 Explain gravity.

Speaker 1 No, he tried to say gravity, and I was like, I don't believe in that shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't believe in gravity. That's a good point.
Don't give me that bullshit about gravity.

Speaker 1 Why don't I float?

Speaker 1 Just gotta let him know. From the side of the earth, why aren't I standing like this? Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, just like in air. You should be floating.
True. We technically, well, yeah, I guess we are, but we're, you know, we're not floating, but the orb we're on is floating.
Yeah, it's kind of sick.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Flying monkeys in space.

Speaker 1 True.

Speaker 1 Where are we at time-wise, Josh? We're at an hour. God damn it.
Just like that. You feel the hour hit a podcast and you go,

Speaker 1 what the fuck happened? I'm all out of ideas. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Sam, thank you so much for doing this, bro. Dude, thank you for having me.
This is like the only time we could have hung out. I know.

Speaker 1 Unfortunately, dude, I got to fucking go to the beach and lay in the water. I have to go cook Baba Ganoush with Tommy Poe.
Oh, you're doing the cookie show. Yeah.
La Ganoush.

Speaker 1 Ever since Chris O'Connor abdicated his role. He's not doing cooking anymore? I don't know what's going on.
Maybe this is no one's business.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 He doesn't want to cook. Maybe, you know.
Tommy featured in the club and he was spilling tea. Anyway,

Speaker 1 Chris doesn't want to cook.

Speaker 1 Well, he doesn't want to cook. What do you do exactly?

Speaker 1 Well, thank you for having me. Thank you, brother.
Appreciate you. Hey, come see me in Philly, by the way.

Speaker 1 Come to Denver. I'm doing helium the first weekend of November.
Come to Denver for Thanksgiving weekend. Listen to Chubby Behemoth.
Thank you guys. I really love hanging out with you guys.

Speaker 1 Let's hang out with you guys. It sucks we have to monetize our chill time.
It does suck. Come on and say you does it though? Hey, I can't always say, does it?

Speaker 1 People say that, and I go, does it? It's kind of fucking awesome. And also, we fucking actually had good in-depth conversations.
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 No, it wasn't me being like, so how was your Providence?

Speaker 1 Dude, imagine if prostitutes could all hang out with each other and get paid. They do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but we don't need anyone. Imagine if we needed someone just like coming on us the whole time.

Speaker 1 We don't even have to get cummed on. We don't have to get cummed on.
Guys, guys,

Speaker 1 October 10th, I'll be at Hilarity's Comedy Club in Cleveland, Ohio. The Wilbur in Boston, Massachusetts.
That is October 18th. Milwaukee Improv, my God.
And guys, the big one.

Speaker 1 The New York City Comedy Festival. They won't shut the fuck up about me making the video.
Guys, I'll be there. I'll be there with you.

Speaker 1 11:16, I'll be in Town Hall, New York, New York, part of the prestigious New York Comedy Festival. I'm excited.
I can't wait. And also, Capital One Hall, Tyson's, Virginia.

Speaker 1 I booked two, I think, theaters prematurely. So please fill them up.

Speaker 1 Back to clubs after that. Please come, guys.
I'm coming to Bridgeport Stress Factory prematurely.

Speaker 1 You've been there before? Oh, dude.

Speaker 1 I heard it's a fucking meat grinder. So, hey, tickets are very available for that weekend.
Out from Octus, October 1st, first Tuesday of the month.

Speaker 1 Creek in the Cave, me, LaMer, Nate, Ari Maddie will be there.

Speaker 1 Dylan Sullivan will be there. He's lost.
All of our good buds will be there. Really? And Nate Marshall, of course.

Speaker 1 October 9th. Okay, Hillium Comedy Club, Indianapolis.
I'll be there in Red Room. And then at the Comedy Cabin in Jamesville that weekend.
The 11th and the 12th. You're going to have a fun time.

Speaker 1 Literally. Jamesville, where? Jamesville where? Wisconsin.
Okay, cool.

Speaker 1 Okay, cool, cool. You're like the mayor when you're doing that.

Speaker 1 When you do that room, they like come and give you a key to the city. They're like, thank you so much for coming to Janesville.

Speaker 1 What happened? Is everything okay?

Speaker 1 Well, hell yeah. God bless you.
Thank you, bros. Sayonara.

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