Sidewalks, Koozies, Pharaohs | Monday Morning Podcast 11-10-25

Speaker 1 Ark Raiders, everybody! Thank you to Embark Studios bringing us their new game, Ark Raiders. A multiplayer extraction adventure video game set in a lethal future Earth.

Speaker 1 Explore an immersive, post-apocalyptic world scarred by conflict and reclaimed by nature. A living surface where weather, enemies, and shifting conditions heighten the constant threat of Ark.

Speaker 1 Communities are forced below ground to survive. Jesus, this is amazing.
Scavenge, survive, thrive in a new extraction adventure.

Speaker 1 Ark Raiders, available now on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X, S, and PC rated T for T.

Speaker 1 Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr, and it's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday.

Speaker 1 Fucking

Speaker 1 November 10th, 2025. What's going on?

Speaker 2 How are you?

Speaker 1 How's it going?

Speaker 1 What's going on in your world? What's going on in your world? I'm fucking watching a little bit of NFL football.

Speaker 1 I took the Seattle Seahawks. I got this game on right now.
Is there anything better than being fucking up 38-7?

Speaker 1 Granted, you know, I'm going to say what they always say. There's plenty of time left.

Speaker 1 There's plenty of time for them to score 32 points and shut them out in the second half. I will tell you,

Speaker 1 the Arizona Cardinals, the all-white uniform, is the shit.

Speaker 1 That takes me back to when they were the St. Louis Cardinals with Mel Gray, O.J.
Anderson, Jim Hart, Neil Lomax,

Speaker 1 Dan Deardoff.

Speaker 1 That was my favorite time in Dan Deirdoff's career when he played football because you couldn't hear him talking.

Speaker 1 No, you know what it is? There's a lot of announcers that, you know, you think you don't like them. Wasn't it really that your team sucked during their career and they were just being honest?

Speaker 1 I think that that's what it was. If I really was to honestly go back and look at Dan Deardoff, the Patriots were not a good fucking team and he was just stating the obvious.

Speaker 1 And rather than me being an adult and just admitting that the patch sucked during that time, I chose instead to kill the messenger.

Speaker 1 That's what it really is.

Speaker 1 Hall of Fame. Who the fuck am I to be making fun of a Hall of Fame?

Speaker 1 Offensive lineman, too.

Speaker 1 I like talking to offensive linemen about defensive linemen because they think they're all dumb.

Speaker 1 They think

Speaker 1 they just think like their whole game plan is get guy with ball, right? Like they're not,

Speaker 1 there's no technique. They don't have set plays, stunts, and all of that shit.

Speaker 1 And obviously they know that, but they're like, what we're doing is way more complex.

Speaker 1 So I was always interested to hear the shit talk

Speaker 1 down there. You know, when some guy across the line is like, I'm going to fucking run you over.
Well, yeah, I mean, what else are you going to do? Get a job as an accountant, you dumb fuck?

Speaker 1 I can guarantee you that has never been said on a football field, but that would be fantastic. Hey, any offensive lineman out there, I would love to write some jokes for you.

Speaker 1 All right, but the thing is, is you got to be mic'd up because i want i i got to hear you know what i mean this is like uh one time i i wrote for uh

Speaker 1 i wrote for somebody hosting an award show

Speaker 1 and uh i gotta i wasn't sure if i if that would be something that i would like to do it's like i want to tell a joke that the laugh and then like to do that gig i couldn't believe how fucking nervous i was

Speaker 1 because you know you write all of these jokes And there was a bunch of people in the writer's room. And all of a sudden they picked one of the jokes that you wrote.

Speaker 1 And I remember when it was coming up, just sitting there on fucking pins and needles,

Speaker 1 and it got a laugh.

Speaker 1 And beyond being relieved, I was psyched for the person that told the joke.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it felt like team sports, but like with comedy. Like I didn't let them down.

Speaker 1 You know?

Speaker 1 Fucking put, I put the, you know, nice saucer pass right on the fucking tape. Right on the tape.

Speaker 1 A lot of hockey references. I've watched the most Bruins hockey I've watched in a long time just because I've finally been like home this time of year.
And dude, I got to tell you, man,

Speaker 1 we are looking all right.

Speaker 1 Seven and one the last eight games. We won three in a row, then lost six.
And I'm like, oh, no.

Speaker 1 They're going to figure it out. They, you know,

Speaker 1 the aches and pains of rebuilding or whatever.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 they just beat the leafs. I've been missing the games because I've been working.

Speaker 1 I got a little bit of work right now. But I've just been following in the newspapers there or whatever, online, however the fuck you do it now.
And we're actually number two in the East

Speaker 1 in our division, the Atlantic Division. It's always going to be the Adams Division to me.
Behind the fucking Montreal Canadians, look at them. They got a team now.

Speaker 1 And the Pittsburgh Penguins. are a good team.
I'll never like the Penguins. I'll never like the Penguins.

Speaker 1 I just can't with that team. You know, it's not the fucking pieces of shit that they have in their ring of honor.

Speaker 1 It's the fact that they have the nerve to complain all of those years about the way people were treating Sidney Crosby. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 You just can't have people like headhunting, ending people's career and blowing out knees, and you're going to put them in the ring of honor. So obviously, you condone that style of fucking play.

Speaker 1 And then you're going to be like a fucking broad about it, that if it happens to your guy, you're going to sit there and complain like well once when they bitched about the islanders that was it for me i was like fuck fuck this organization

Speaker 3 um

Speaker 1 other than that i got no beef with them

Speaker 1 tackle a fucking guy now of course they're just going right down the field my new england patriots

Speaker 1 all of a sudden They're fucking eight and two.

Speaker 1 You know, I don't know. Like, there's a chance.

Speaker 1 Who knows?

Speaker 1 It's still early on, but there's a chance we could actually win the division. Who saw that at the beginning of the year? I sure as hell didn't.

Speaker 1 Mike Vrabel, coach of the year.

Speaker 1 Is it too soon to say that? I don't know. He's got to be in the running, considering where we were last year versus now.

Speaker 1 And he's doing a great job with all of these injuries that we have. Beating a strong Tampa Bay Buccaneer team.
Oh, my God, when we threw that fucking end zone, pick in the end zone.

Speaker 1 the last thing you wanted to do, throw it out of the end zone, get the three points, and then make them go down the field, score a touchdown, and get eight points.

Speaker 1 When we threw that pick, I was like, ah, fuck, here we go, right?

Speaker 1 But I was sitting there thinking, like, you know what? They've only scored 16 points the whole game. There's only six minutes left.
Our defense, and of course, they just go right down the field.

Speaker 1 The amount of fucking times I have seen that

Speaker 1 team just, you know, scores 12 points,

Speaker 1 13 points,

Speaker 1 and all of a sudden they they get the ball back. They're still in striking distance.
And all of a sudden, they just go down the field like they've scored 50 points on you that day.

Speaker 1 What I love is not only did the Patriots stop them, we blitzed them twice

Speaker 1 on that drive. And I got to tell you, that separates Mike Vrabel, I feel, from like 98%.

Speaker 1 That's a false start. What the fuck?

Speaker 1 Sorry.

Speaker 1 Cardinals driving.

Speaker 1 I should stay on for this whole half if they come back.

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 I think that sets Mike Grable apart from 98% of the coaches in the league. Most of them would have gone into some stupid fucking pre-vent, rush three,

Speaker 1 like the Giants did a few weeks ago, rushing three?

Speaker 1 I mean, at that point,

Speaker 1 even old Freckles, 57 years old, I could dump it off to somebody.

Speaker 1 All right, Bill, let's not get crazy. You're right.
You're right. I got a little.
listen.

Speaker 1 I'm very passionate about this subject, okay? You've been playing defense the whole game, and you've been shutting them down. Keep playing defense.

Speaker 1 Don't go into make-a-wish defense.

Speaker 1 You know, all the way down to your own 20, and then you start playing D.

Speaker 1 We're going to take 30 seconds off the clock and just give them four shots at the fucking end zone. That's how we plan on winning this game.
They got the ball on the fucking 30.

Speaker 1 I'll tell you, I don't even know what I'm talking about right now because i just had my second cup of coffee and um

Speaker 1 that's an incomplete pass baby

Speaker 1 incomplete pass there you go there you go what is it now third and goal

Speaker 3 um

Speaker 1 yeah he had a couple of uh jesus christ i'm surprised they didn't call that where was his hand

Speaker 1 no that was fine

Speaker 1 What is the rule? You can't have it on his hip and pull him around. He was kind of doing that.

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Why the fuck would you run it there?

Speaker 1 It was third and goal, and they were like on their own seven-yard lines, and they ran it up the gut.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 That was fucking bizarre. Anyway, I know I have the TV on.
I'm getting distracted here.

Speaker 1 The fuck was I talking about? Nothing important.

Speaker 1 Anyway, I had a quick acting gig. I'm back in LA, but I was up in I was up in Vancouver,

Speaker 1 Vancouver, Canada. And oh, now it's fourth and goal.
Okay, now it's fourth and goal.

Speaker 1 So third and goal, you picked up a couple yards. Okay, I get it.
I get it.

Speaker 1 Anyway, plowing ahead here.

Speaker 1 I was up in Vancouver doing a, I had a quick acting gig,

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 I got to tell you, you know, they had me staying downtown.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 like the level of fucking junkies,

Speaker 1 just openly like, I only saw one, smoking crack, like out in the fucking open. Dude, it was like Escape from New York,

Speaker 1 Vancouver.

Speaker 1 style, right?

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 my lovely wife came up because she's she's just the best. She came up, we had an awesome time when I wasn't working.
And

Speaker 1 she was walking down the street going like,

Speaker 1 why the fuck didn't you do run it in?

Speaker 1 It's fucking wide open. Why didn't you just run it in?

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 why am I rooting against my bet?

Speaker 1 So she's walking down the street, right? We went to this restaurant.

Speaker 1 You know, Nia, she knows everywhere to go, right? So she gets the whole layout. She goes, you go up, you just focus on your acting gig.

Speaker 1 I'll find the best coffee spots for you in the best restaurants, right?

Speaker 1 You know.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 that's what she does, right? So we go to this restaurant. This Italian place and

Speaker 1 You know, we come walking in. Everybody knows about the place, so there's like no tables.
And they said, okay, we can put you on the list.

Speaker 1 You know, go down the street.

Speaker 1 There's a little wine bar down the street. And hang out.
We'll text you if we get a table. So we're like, cool.
So we go down the street. We start walking down this fucking street.

Speaker 1 Dude, it was like we were in a goddamn zombie movie.

Speaker 1 Just people nodding one guy nodding off in the street like a bunch of people just like

Speaker 1 It looked like you ever see those old school pictures of New York City before air conditioning, and at night everybody used to hang out on the stoops, and like

Speaker 1 you know, that was like community, and everybody would be talking and joking around and telling stories or whatever. It was like that, except everyone was on drugs.

Speaker 1 And you know, that was when we walked by, and this lady was just like smoking crack. I mean, it was fucking brutal.
And Nia is going, God damn, she's like, This city,

Speaker 1 this is fucking hardcore.

Speaker 1 And I was like, well, yeah, they don't view.

Speaker 1 She goes, why is it like that here? And I was telling her that

Speaker 1 they don't criminalize doing drugs. They view it as a disease.
So they don't arrest you for doing that. They try to get you help.

Speaker 1 She goes, Yeah. And I go, yeah.
So

Speaker 1 that's what that looks like.

Speaker 1 You know, it's the classic

Speaker 1 whenever you go left or whenever they go right to try to fix a problem, they never go all the way. They just take one step.
So it's like, okay, you made the step of not criminalizing it.

Speaker 1 These people are in pain. Like the stuff they, a lot of those, you know, came from broken homes.
They were beaten. They were molested.
They fought in a war. Something happened to them.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 they're trying to numb the pain. They need help.
So you just decriminalize it. and then, like,

Speaker 1 let's fucking get them into a treatment center, but blah, blah, blah. There's got to be something.
You just don't decriminalize it.

Speaker 1 I'm sure they did a little more, but like, if they went the other way,

Speaker 1 what the fuck was that?

Speaker 1 After a goal-line stand, what do you do to reward your defense? You come out and you throw a fucking defense, a fucking interception.

Speaker 1 Oh, you motherfucker.

Speaker 1 I actually did great this week. I'll get back to the drug.
Oh, it hit the hit a helmet. My fault, my fault, my fault, my fault, my fault.

Speaker 1 He fucking ricocheted off.

Speaker 1 You know what? That defensive lineman pushing the Smarty Pants offensive lineman into the quarterback should get a

Speaker 1 half an assist. You ain't get half a sack.
He should get half an interception on that.

Speaker 1 Nice catch, though.

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 yeah,

Speaker 1 then what happens is then a right-wing person got me fucking clear.

Speaker 1 And it's just like,

Speaker 1 then they just fucking throw him in an alligator Alcatraz. Like, it's never like,

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 So, anyway, so here's the thing: living in Los Angeles,

Speaker 1 you know, I don't know a lot about Vancouver, but living in Los Angeles, like how right-wing people like to

Speaker 1 show Los Angeles is they completely ignore 99% of it and they just show Skid Row. And they just go, look at this place, just an absolute fucking shithole.

Speaker 1 And they just shit all over it and they shit all over Canada. And they don't realize that most of the people that they're showing are probably people that fought,

Speaker 1 you know, in the never-ending Iraqi situation, whatever it's called. They have PTSD.
They ended up on the fucking...

Speaker 1 These are the same people that you would cheer in halftime at a fucking football game. Come back to the country, you know, a year and a half, two years later

Speaker 1 with what happens when you

Speaker 1 have to do what you have to do in a war and they end up out there and you're shitting all over them. And anyway, so then they depict

Speaker 1 Los Angeles. Like that is Los Angeles.
It's like, it isn't Los Angeles. It's not Los Angeles, but like, I never see that.
I'm not down there.

Speaker 1 So that's what I liked about the World Series is the World Series went the opposite way where they finally started showing, you know, beautiful women out fucking roller skating in Venice and Santa Monica beaches.

Speaker 2 You know, I don't know.

Speaker 1 So I was saying to my wife, I go, there's no way this is what Vancouver looks like. We're just in, we're just, we're on skid row here, so we have to get out of here.

Speaker 1 So then, you know, we went to the West End,

Speaker 1 went over a couple of bridges, and we're like, okay, here we go. There's the rest of the city.
Let's give this city

Speaker 1 its just due or whatever. But like,

Speaker 1 for the life of me, for the life of me, the fact that that is a thing now,

Speaker 1 two things that blow my mind: comedians trashing other comedians in specials and on podcasts, just the cannibalism of that. And then also watching like states hating other states.

Speaker 1 It's like, did we learn anything? Have we learned anything?

Speaker 1 I just don't understand it.

Speaker 1 All right, touchdown fucking Cardinals. I will shout out to the wide receiver for not shushing the crowd.

Speaker 1 If I see one more fucking wide receiver make a catch and shush a crowd while his team is losing,

Speaker 1 I do love that guy on

Speaker 1 the Falcons who was killing the Patriots last week. That Drake London kid.
He's fucking amazing. But every time he would catch a touchdown pass, he would shush the crowd.

Speaker 1 And the whole time, his team was losing. It's just like

Speaker 1 there's still something to cheer for. Despite the fact that you just caught another touchdown pass, you are still losing.

Speaker 1 Here we go. Go for the two-point conversion.
You know,

Speaker 1 try to score another touchdown and only get two points for it.

Speaker 1 Watch, I'll be wrong. They hike the ball.
He's going to the end zone and

Speaker 1 he got it. Yeah, there you go.
See, shows you what the fuck I know.

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 look at this shit. Now it's 38.15.
So now what? Now I got to fucking sweat this out.

Speaker 1 Whatever. It was lucky.
They had two deflections: a deflection for an interception and a deflection for a touchdown. He got both feet down.

Speaker 1 He did, in fact, make a football move. It was, in fact, a catch.

Speaker 1 So anyway,

Speaker 1 yeah, I have

Speaker 1 come to the conclusion that the internet is fucking evil.

Speaker 1 And it's how they, not like on purpose. It's just negative

Speaker 1 controversy

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 people screaming and yelling at each other. It's the only way

Speaker 1 to get views because it's just so much shit.

Speaker 1 How are we going to stand out? Do something positive and be nice to people? People, no one wants to see that. That's not entertaining.
So, I don't know.

Speaker 1 Other than people like fucking doing crazy tricks on skateboards or doing shit athletically or musically, it's just kind of like human beings being mean to each other.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 I am,

Speaker 1 I'm trying to avoid it. I'm trying to avoid it.
Because I don't want to, you know,

Speaker 1 I don't want to fucking

Speaker 1 go through life like that. I've had enough bullshit,

Speaker 1 you know?

Speaker 1 All I need is a fucking.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what the fuck I need, but I don't need to be going around fucking upset about shit.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what it is, and be, and get myself all fucking worked up over something a fucking robot said, or a bot.

Speaker 1 I really want those fucking nerds to just ask them the question, like, why do you do that shit?

Speaker 1 Like, you just go around trolling your own countrymen. You can't see what that's doing to people.
You can't see that. Or, like, these fucking assholes.
I always talk about those 24-hour news networks.

Speaker 1 That's all you guys fucking do.

Speaker 1 And then, when something positive happens and people try to bring people together, then all of a sudden you give a fuck about human rights and start demonizing.

Speaker 1 Oh, the fuck could you, how the fuck could I do that? How the fuck could you tear your own country apart, you cunts? Oh,

Speaker 1 am I ever gonna let that go?

Speaker 1 Wasn't I talking about forgiveness?

Speaker 1 I think I was.

Speaker 1 I think I was. All right, I'm off the rails here.
I'm just babbling. What else? Um, I'm watching an amazing trilogy on uh the Criterion Collection,

Speaker 1 which I said is Cinemax for smart people. There's still nudity, there's still plenty of violence, but oh, it is just done in such an artistic way.

Speaker 1 So I'm watching this trilogy of movies called Carlos.

Speaker 1 I watched the first one, and I am into the second one. It's about this terrorist who was active, as far as I can tell, from the late 60s into the mid-80s, Carlos the Jackal.
And I guess he was famous.

Speaker 1 I was too young

Speaker 1 to know about it. And

Speaker 1 the lead actor in it, everybody is amazing but the lead actor who plays Carlos is fucking incredible sorry I got the hiccups

Speaker 1 and I I

Speaker 1 I can't recommend it highly enough there's so much good shit out there on that channel the criterion channel all right if you want to balance out you know a little social media little fucking you know scrolling brain-dead shit You know,

Speaker 1 no problem. I get it.
Sometimes you don't want to think, but every once in a while, if you're like, you know what? I've watched enough dumb shit. I should watch something that

Speaker 1 maybe the people that made it actually gave a fuck.

Speaker 1 I would definitely check out the Criterion channel. They got to send me a fucking sweatshirt or something.
Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 I've been fucking hyping that channel lately.

Speaker 1 What else? Was there anything else? Yeah, I found like a bunch of good coffee shops when I was up there in Vancouver.

Speaker 1 And then also I'm psyched to get back because now I'm done for the year. I don't have anything else really to do

Speaker 1 as far as traveling and everything. So

Speaker 1 I got this new exercise that I saw. It's kind of some Dave Elid shit and some Mike Johnston shit on how to free yourself up behind the kit.
And I just, I got to like

Speaker 1 commit to this shit.

Speaker 1 I don't know why. I just,

Speaker 1 I get so excited to go in and play along to these songs that I'm trying to figure out.

Speaker 1 And I always tell myself, you know, for the first 10 minutes, I'm just going to concentrate on flowing around the kit and da-da-da-da-da-da. And I just

Speaker 1 never get around to it. So I finally just googled the same way I Googled how to forgive people.

Speaker 1 Which, like I said, I can't wait to see just that Google alone, how much that's going to change the type of ads that are sent my way. You fucking cunt, the fucking holding call.

Speaker 1 Jesus fucking Christ. Does anything kill a drive like a fucking holding call?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, Jesus Christ. He mugged him.
All right. Well, you can't get mad if he actually did it.

Speaker 1 Anyway.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 here yeah, it was this really easy thing where you just have this

Speaker 1 one-bar pattern that you play. You get that down, you move it around the kit and everything.
So you get to the point where it's just,

Speaker 1 you know, you don't even have to think. So then what you do as you're playing that, you just sort of sing a fill in your head.

Speaker 1 And,

Speaker 1 oh my God, don't even tell me they just turned it over again.

Speaker 1 Guys, the wheels are falling off.

Speaker 1 What in the fucking fuck? Are you going to, that's a fumble?

Speaker 1 Oh my god, you got to be fucking kidding me.

Speaker 1 That's a fucking fumble.

Speaker 4 Oh, my God.

Speaker 4 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 You got to be fucking kidding me.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. They have played the whole fucking second half in their own end.

Speaker 1 Look at Sam Donnell. He's like, Jesus fucking Christ.

Speaker 1 Balls going off helmets, shit getting deflected.

Speaker 1 Oh my god. This is everything I hate about football now.

Speaker 1 How the fuck are you up 38-7 and fucking 10 minutes later, all of a sudden it's like, wait a minute.

Speaker 1 You got to be fucking kidding me. Are they going to lose this game? I don't even give a shit.
I don't even give a fuck.

Speaker 1 There you go. Fucking seven yards.
Why not? Why the fuck not?

Speaker 1 Anyway, so I think the Mike Johnson thing was kick right, left, kick, right, left,

Speaker 1 left, left,

Speaker 2 right.

Speaker 1 So it was eight note thing. Kick right, left, kick, right, left, left, right.

Speaker 1 Okay, so you play that four times, 16th notes, and as you, you know, get that moving around the kit and everything, and then you just start singing to Phil, I am committing to to that.

Speaker 1 You know, or

Speaker 1 I got some triplet shit that I've been working on. Maybe I'll just play that.

Speaker 1 And then, like, singing the fills, because I already have like a bunch of 16th note triplet things that I can kind of go in and out of, but it's still just, you know, I'm not saying anything.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? Like, if they were words, I'm just going like, you know, yellow car, yellow car, and then, like, I'm saying brown car, brown car, yellow car, brown car.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? Just like, it's not a sentence. It's not.

Speaker 1 If I was to put it in words, I'm just like saying this four times and then saying this word four times, and then I'm saying it two times, and then this word three times.

Speaker 1 But I'm just, I'm not, they're just memorized. I'm not listening to what I'm fucking playing.

Speaker 1 I'm not feeling what I'm playing, I'm just doing it.

Speaker 1 So I have always been fascinated.

Speaker 1 And I think that this is like, this is like a comedian that

Speaker 1 has found his or her voice, can just go with the flow.

Speaker 1 Can write on stage, rip on stage, crowd says something, you can just interact with them. You can do your jokes in any fucking order or whatever.

Speaker 1 I'll be honest with you, it's hard to learn how to do that as a comedian and you're doing it speaking the English language, which you speak all the time. with everybody.

Speaker 1 So you're always sort of jamming with other people, improvising, listening to them, which makes you say something else. To be able to learn how to do that on a fucking instrument

Speaker 1 is the closest thing to like magic to me.

Speaker 1 Okay, fuck David Blaine. That guy, you know, no disrespect to that guy.

Speaker 2 Okay?

Speaker 1 If you really could do that shit, why wouldn't you just go fucking rob a bank?

Speaker 1 You know?

Speaker 1 If you're going to be selfish or like do something that would help the world

Speaker 1 instead of just freaking out black people and making them run away from you.

Speaker 1 That's kind of funny. White people's reaction to David Blaine, they just sort of stand there

Speaker 1 and black people run away. I feel like that really just says like,

Speaker 1 you know, I think if you don't run away,

Speaker 1 it kind of,

Speaker 1 the least impressed you are with it

Speaker 1 the closer you are to like the Illuminati or you like know some shit

Speaker 1 You're just kind of like oh this is this the bullshit you're doing

Speaker 1 or maybe you you like know of a technology that exists that other people no I think I'm I think I'm reading into it too much

Speaker 2 not not not me

Speaker 1 not me reading into shit too much

Speaker 1 all right dude what's the over-under that the fucking Arizona Cardinals are going to be down one score we'll say eight points

Speaker 1 by the time I'm fucking

Speaker 1 done with this podcast. What do I got? How much time I got left?

Speaker 2 I got

Speaker 1 31 minutes. 31.
Wilbert Montgomery.

Speaker 1 The best 31 that ever played in the league, my opinion.

Speaker 1 All right, anyway.

Speaker 1 So that's what I'm going to be working on. And like I said, I've always said I got to say shit out loud.
If I say it out loud, then I do do it.

Speaker 1 If I just think it, it just sort of disappears into the fucking vast emptiness of my giant head.

Speaker 2 Touchdown. No, he dropped it.

Speaker 1 He fucking dropped it. Third and 11.

Speaker 1 You know, they're going for it.

Speaker 1 They got two more shots at the end zone. Just fucking give it to that guy.
Run it up the middle again.

Speaker 1 I threw it a little behind him.

Speaker 1 Do you guys remember a long fucking time ago I was doing a podcast when that Viking Saints game,

Speaker 1 like the last play of the game? That was

Speaker 1 what's his face?

Speaker 1 Stephon Diggs.

Speaker 1 Okay, so they dumped it underneath. Here we go.
Now it's fourth down. It's not even fourth in goal.
Five minutes to go.

Speaker 1 I like this coach of the Cardinals.

Speaker 1 The dude is jacked. He's got his hat pulled down.
You can't see his fucking face. He's locked in.

Speaker 1 The Seattle coach looks a little concerned. Strong mustache on that offensive lineman.
If you're watching, I thought that was Dana White on the sidelines.

Speaker 1 All right, here we go. 38-15, fourth and five.
Are they going to go for the first down? Are they going to go for the end zone?

Speaker 1 Going for the end zone.

Speaker 1 What happened?

Speaker 1 What happened? Nothing.

Speaker 1 Flag, no flag?

Speaker 1 Oh, he caught it. And he got a fucking hand on it.
Wow.

Speaker 1 That's it. Well, now they're going to look at that for fucking three hours.
Gonna take another look at it.

Speaker 1 When he was in the air, did he secure the ball? Did he fucking

Speaker 2 shut up?

Speaker 1 All right, that's enough of my babbling. But that is what I'm gonna do

Speaker 1 on drums, because I don't know if you, if you play drums or you play guitar, don't you always hear shit in your head? And you just think, yeah, if I could just fucking do that,

Speaker 1 I think you just got to do the work to figure out how to do it, right? I mean, if you can think it, you can do it, right? No, it's not true. I can think about dunking a basketball.
I can't do that.

Speaker 1 Well, within reason.

Speaker 1 What if it was that easy? And all of a sudden, what would you guys do if I did some sort of fucking semi-celebrity pickup basketball game and I just took off from the fire?

Speaker 1 Oh, one of those ones, the missed shot where it comes up off the rim and that dude jumps up over everybody and just throws it down?

Speaker 1 The dream of every white guy who can't fucking jump.

Speaker 1 What if I just did that at 57?

Speaker 1 Bill how did you do that you know I just laid off cheeseburgers

Speaker 1 my whole life I've just been eating them and then I found out I had high cholesterol and I just I didn't eat them for a couple weeks and next thing you know I just

Speaker 1 you know I was feeling lighter and I just kind of

Speaker 3 um

Speaker 1 I would love a fucking cheeseburger right

Speaker 1 fucking now and I mean a real one not that smash burger fucking horseshit

Speaker 1 Looks like somebody smuggled it into the country.

Speaker 1 Would you have that in your sock? What the fuck is that? I can't even see any meat.

Speaker 1 One of the most overrated, like, just like overrated things.

Speaker 1 All right, overrated things, I would say smash burgers, dishwashers, and remember koozies?

Speaker 1 Remember that shit? That was the dumbest shit ever. Well, when you'll fucking hold the beer in your hand, your hand makes the fucking thing more.

Speaker 1 Like, how long does it take you to drink the fucking thing?

Speaker 1 Or does your hand get too cold, you fucking pussy?

Speaker 1 I don't even see those things anymore.

Speaker 1 That was also like when you knew you had a problem.

Speaker 1 That's when you knew, like, your alcohol intake was getting out of control. When you were going to the fucking the gift shop,

Speaker 1 you know?

Speaker 1 When you actually had like a Miller High Life t-shirt and like a fucking koozie

Speaker 1 You know, I remember like there was a a thing back in the day,

Speaker 1 like you could smoke Marlboros.

Speaker 1 These guys used to just smoke Marlboro Reds and they would save like

Speaker 1 something,

Speaker 1 the barcode or the box top, like cereal or some shit. And

Speaker 1 okay, good. They kept it on the fucking ground.
There's no holding call.

Speaker 1 Is that a horse caller?

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 that fuck was, oh yeah, you could send these things in, and they would send you like a jacket and all of this shit.

Speaker 1 And that was still going on right when I started stand-up comedy, and a lot of comedians had jokes about how,

Speaker 1 you know, they smoked enough cigarettes, they had enough credits to get their own iron lung and shit like that.

Speaker 1 I will tell you, I fucking, I do miss smoking.

Speaker 1 I never thought I would ever say that. I really fucking miss smoking cigars.

Speaker 1 But I'm only like 14 days into this 100-day run.

Speaker 1 So it usually takes like 10 days. But there was something about being up there in Vancouver, and I went by like this cigar place, and they had allegedly had Cuban cigars in there.

Speaker 1 You know, I learned that the hard way that like most of them are fake, even in countries where they're legal.

Speaker 1 Just the demand versus the supply. It's just so,

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Like, even people who don't smoke cigars know that Cuban cigars are the best, so

Speaker 1 they're trying to get them or whatever. So you can just, I don't know, it's stupid.

Speaker 1 All right, first down. Who the fuck is this running back for the Seattle Seahawks?

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 Is he that good? Is the offensive line? Let me see what the offensive line is doing here.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'd say, yeah, that's a gaping fucking hole.

Speaker 1 Could have driven a fucking bus through that goddamn thing. Still, though.

Speaker 1 Anyway, all right, let's get to the reads for this week.

Speaker 1 What do we got here?

Speaker 2 Quo.

Speaker 1 Q-U-O. Quo, everybody.
You know, running a business on a clunky old phone system is like competing with one hand tied behind your back. And every time you miss a call,

Speaker 1 that's money left on the table. Quo, formerly open phone,

Speaker 1 is the modern alternative built to help you work smarter, build stronger relationships, and never miss on an opportunity because that's not what your business and your customers deserve.

Speaker 1 Quo is the number one business phone system built for 2025, not 1995. Rated the top choice for customer satisfaction

Speaker 1 with over 3,000 reviews on G2.

Speaker 1 Forget juggling phone calls or using a landline. Quo works right on an app, on your phone, or computer.
Your whole team can share one number and collaborate on calls and texts like a shared inbox.

Speaker 1 Faster

Speaker 1 responses, happier customers. And Quo is not just a phone system, it's a smart system.
Built-in AI log calls, writes summaries and even sets up next steps. And hey, can't answer the phone?

Speaker 1 Quo's AI agent can.

Speaker 1 Qualifying leads, rounding calls to the right person, and making sure no customer is ever left hanging. Even after hours, Quo's got your back.
It keeps the lights on while you're actually sleeping.

Speaker 1 That's why over 90,000 businesses are already running on Quo. From solo operations to growing teams, Quo helps businesses stay connected and look professional.

Speaker 1 Quo is offering my listeners 20% off your first six months at quo.com/slash burr. That's quo.com/slash burr.

Speaker 1 You can even keep your existing number for free, quo. No missed calls, no missed customers.

Speaker 1 Okay, Robin Hood.

Speaker 1 You know, nobody knows your money goals better than you. Robin Hood puts you in control of your money with tools that work as hard as you do.

Speaker 1 Looking in on everything,

Speaker 1 what?

Speaker 1 locking in on every opening jesus bill beating your pr beating it again channel that drive into your money robinhood puts you in control of your money trade stocks and etfs option futures and crypto all in one platform you can now build and execute your own trades from a desktop with robinhood's legendary

Speaker 1 legends advanced tools Dude, I wouldn't know how to do any of this shit. Or take advantage of the new Robinhood strategies with a tailored portfolio managed by a team of experts.

Speaker 1 You expect more from yourself. Expect more from your money.
Get started today at Robinhood.com slash your money.

Speaker 1 That's Y-O-U-R.

Speaker 1 Money.

Speaker 1 Again, that's Robinhood.com slash your money. Your money, your move.
Disclosure, all investments involve risk, including loss of principal.

Speaker 1 Options, futures, and crypto trading carry significant risks and may not suit all investors. Securities offered throughout Robinhood Financial LLC members SIPC.

Speaker 1 Future trading is offered by Robinhood Derivatives, LLC, and not SPIC or FDIC Protected. Crypto offered through Robinhood Crypto, LLC, parentheses, NMLS ID 1702840, parenthesis.

Speaker 1 Not FDIC or SIPC protected portfolio management offered by Robinhood Strategies on SEC Registered Advisor and SEC Registered Advisor. Ark Raiders, everybody.

Speaker 1 Thank you to Embark Studios bringing us their new game, Ark Raiders. A multiplayer extraction adventure video game set in a lethal future Earth.

Speaker 1 Explore an immersive, post-apocalyptic world scarred by conflict and reclaimed by nature. A living surface where weather, enemies, and shifting conditions heighten the constant threat of ARC.

Speaker 1 Communities are forced below ground to survive. Jesus, this is amazing.
Scavenge, survive, thrive in a new extraction adventure.

Speaker 1 Ark Raiders, available now on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X, S, and PC rated T for T.

Speaker 5 This is Larry Flick, owner of the floor store. You know that thing that snuck up on you last year called the holidays? Well, they're coming again.

Speaker 5 But it's okay because our pre-holiday sales are already here. Now through November 17th, everything in the store is 30% off.

Speaker 5 Carpet, hardwood, laminate, laminate, waterproof flooring, I mean everything. An installation before the holidays is guaranteed.
It's our biggest sale of the season, but it ends Monday.

Speaker 5 Go to floorstores.com to find the nearest of our 11 showrooms from Santa Rosa to San Jose. The floor store, your Bay Area flooring authority.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ, sorry, stomach growling. Trying to be in shape here, dude.

Speaker 1 Been hitting the fucking elliptical.

Speaker 1 Doing the weights, full body.

Speaker 1 Full body, dude. Giving myself a flat stomach for Christmas.

Speaker 1 Actually, when I was up in Canada, I found this great place that sold rock and roll t-shirts, man.

Speaker 1 And I got an ACDC and a Black Sabbath for my kids. You know, raising them right.

Speaker 1 It's perfect. I let my wife handle fucking the Janet Jackson, Michael Jackson shit, and I do the ACDC Black Sabbath.
They got a nice fucking portfolio of music.

Speaker 1 The kind of portfolio that you can use on Robinhood. Look at that.
I brought it back.

Speaker 1 I brought it back. All right.
Here we go. All right.

Speaker 1 Where did it go? Where did it go?

Speaker 2 What a, what, what, what, what, what?

Speaker 1 Okay, kids and teens with phones.

Speaker 1 I know. That's, I'm going to have to deal with that in the next 10 years.
Bill, kids do not need phones. No, they don't.

Speaker 1 Aside from the constant radiation and the addictive blue screen light, their addictions are getting out of control. Parents are partially to blame.
I got one for you. Adults don't need phones.

Speaker 1 You don't need it.

Speaker 1 You could just have all of your shit go to your fucking laptop. And once every five or six hours, you can check in on your text messages.
I can tell you this, 99%

Speaker 1 of text messaging is bullshit. It's just somebody that's on their phone.
They don't even know why they're on their phone.

Speaker 1 And then they just text you, and then you talk back and forth, and you fucking... text live about a fucking game.
It's stupid.

Speaker 1 I don't think anybody needs them.

Speaker 1 Parents are partially to blame.

Speaker 1 I think they're 100% to blame. If a kid can't afford a fucking phone and they still have one, that means the parent bought it.

Speaker 1 It's their fault because they don't want to spend time with their kids and engage with them.

Speaker 1 Well, nobody makes that decision. I think people, I think parents are also addicted to their phones.

Speaker 1 It's definitely a time suck,

Speaker 1 and they're finding more and more studies that for the developing brain, it's horrible.

Speaker 1 Forget about a fully developed brain. I don't know.
I just find when I'm off the shit, I think better.

Speaker 1 I think smarter, not like everybody says.

Speaker 1 This person goes on to say, okay, so they don't want to spend time with their kids and engage with them.

Speaker 1 So they hand them an iPad with a stupid game where they have to tap the screen like a video poker machine in a shitty casino bar.

Speaker 1 I say partially because obviously most don't know that it's not just neglective, but also actively harming their kids' brains.

Speaker 1 Apple's new phone has a higher blue light output than any of their previous phones, so that's swell. How bad has it gotten?

Speaker 1 A teacher got pepper sprayed by a student in Nashville after taking her phone away in class.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's like

Speaker 1 taking somebody's drugs.

Speaker 3 All right.

Speaker 1 There's 13 minutes left or so. 1331, I believe, my old man eyes.
38.15.

Speaker 1 The Seahawks are driving. Now, this is one of these things that they just kick a fucking field goal.
I'm done. I'm going to cover.
Right.

Speaker 1 But what they're going to do for some stupid fucking reason, I don't know. Watch, they'll probably go for it on fourth down here

Speaker 1 whenever that comes about.

Speaker 1 Anyway, but getting back to it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's going to be a really tough thing

Speaker 1 with my kids because this is the first year my daughter hasn't asked for a phone. She knows she's not getting one.

Speaker 1 And we really limit any sort of like

Speaker 1 TV, screen time.

Speaker 1 We're really pretty good about that. I mean...

Speaker 1 I think I'm doing a good job because my kids come home, they say, Dad, you want to play baseball? You want to ride bikes? You want to play drums?

Speaker 3 Um,

Speaker 1 we're always in the driveway or out in our backyard, we got a nice backyard,

Speaker 1 and uh,

Speaker 1 you know, summertime, we're always swimming. So, I kind of make sure, but then you know, there is that thing where they also have to kind of know about it.
But I feel like it's school and shit

Speaker 1 they interact with them. I don't know, it's fucking terrible.
The whole thing is that the whole thing is, and it's always been this way. Why? It's always been this way.

Speaker 1 It's just

Speaker 1 now they have more access

Speaker 1 to your kids, which is really fucking creepy. And they're sitting there.
You have to look at the phone like you've just let a stranger into the house and it's talking to your kid.

Speaker 1 It's really fucking creepy. And everything is designed to get people addicted to it, especially on the phone.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 the internet, basically. It's just like,

Speaker 1 I don't know. once they discovered

Speaker 1 addiction,

Speaker 1 every business,

Speaker 1 like I said, they didn't view heroin addiction as horrific. They looked at it with envy.

Speaker 1 Like, I wish people craved what we're selling, or they wish they craved our food the way they craved drugs and shit. And they just put chemicals in it.

Speaker 1 They did studies on the human brain and figured out ways to make their shit addictive. And politicians sat back and let him do it because they paid them off.
That's basically it.

Speaker 1 And anybody who tried to get him to stop was just called a fucking socialist.

Speaker 1 Anytime, anytime you look out for the people, you're a fucking socialist. So

Speaker 1 I don't know. I am of the belief that you are on your fucking own.

Speaker 1 I don't give a shit if you've joined a group or you're strong into politics. You're still on your fucking own.
So you got to watch out for yourself first so you can look out for your your kids um

Speaker 1 so i don't know i'm still on my phone a lot even though i got off social media um

Speaker 1 i do a lot of uh

Speaker 1 duolingo gin rummy and i do this

Speaker 1 word search thing

Speaker 1 and those water tube things

Speaker 1 i don't know I'm still fucking addicted to it. I just sort of, it's like you quit drinking and then you fucking smoke weed every day.
You know, it's one of those deals. But whatever.

Speaker 1 I'm working on it.

Speaker 1 But I appreciate you bringing this stuff up. Does anybody, has anybody, here's a question I have.
Any parents out there who had kids that had phones and iPads and you got rid of them?

Speaker 1 How did that happen? Did your kids try to pepper spray you? So that's two things.

Speaker 1 You know? And that, and I also need offensive linemen to write in, tell me their situation, and I'll write some fucking jokes for them.

Speaker 1 I just need a little more background on what happens in the trenches.

Speaker 1 All right, forgiving people.

Speaker 1 Hey, old Billy, Bible boy, heard you talking about forgiveness on Thursday's podcast and felt compelled to reach out because that's something I just recently came to

Speaker 1 terms with as well at 45. I went a couple of decades being pushed and pulled through the spiritual ringer after questioning my faith in God.
I believe you're beginning to understand forgiveness.

Speaker 1 Maybe some of your listeners have not. Parentheses, I know I didn't for a long time.

Speaker 1 All right, they kicked a field goal. There we go.
All right.

Speaker 1 Stop the bleeding here. 4115.
I believe.

Speaker 1 Maybe some of your listeners have not. I know I didn't for the longest time.
But when you see, that's how you get your point across.

Speaker 1 If you just say, maybe some of your listeners have not, you guys all would have been like, what the fuck's this guy talking about me for?

Speaker 1 But the second you say, I know I didn't, I've made mistakes for the longest time, blah, blah, blah. Once you do that, people can hear your information.

Speaker 1 But this person goes on to say, but when you forgive someone, it isn't for the other person. It's for you.
I know, that's what I'm fucking learning.

Speaker 1 And that's the hardest thing because you're sitting there, I'm not forgiving that motherfucker, you know.

Speaker 1 You don't even need to contact them to forgive them.

Speaker 1 It's so you can heal and not live with anger, resentment, vengeance, or guilt. When you carry that weight, you have the power to subconsciously hurt yourself and those around you.

Speaker 1 Not to mention, end up in jail

Speaker 1 if you go out and assault somebody.

Speaker 1 When Jesus was dying on the cross, he said, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they are doing.

Speaker 1 Homeboy was being crucified and was praying for the souls of those killing him, which is pretty metal, if you ask me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think I would have been saying that.

Speaker 1 I don't think I would have been trashing them either. I would be like, oh, like it's, you know,

Speaker 1 this fucking thing. I wouldn't have been doing that.

Speaker 1 Anyway, there's also a Hawaiian practice for healing called, oh my god, can I buy an O?

Speaker 1 It's H-O apostrophe O-P-O-N-O-P-O-N-O.

Speaker 1 Ho oponopono.

Speaker 1 Oponopono.

Speaker 1 Are you fucking with me? Ho, opo, no, open, open phone? Opo phono.

Speaker 1 Anyways, it's like a mental reset button using four short phrases that you repeat while you're thinking of a person, situation, or even saying it to yourself in a mirror. Silently or out loud.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm sorry. Acknowledging any role.
even unconscious in the problem. Please forgive me.
Asking for forgiveness. Thank you.
Express gratitude gratitude for the lesson, healing, etc. I love you.

Speaker 1 Send love to the person, situation, self.

Speaker 1 Okay, I guess I get thank you for the lesson because I learned something through the pain, and I love you because I'm not going to hate you anymore.

Speaker 1 I get all of that. Oh, and the fucking lions finally did it.
They finally did it. They're finally going to fucking cover.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry, please forgive me. I acknowledge any role, even if unconscious, in the problem.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry I was there. Sorry I was a kid.
Like, I don't know, what the fuck am I supposed to do with that? Please forgive me. Ask for forgiveness.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Maybe I'll just do three and four.

Speaker 1 Anyway, I hope this helps you or someone that's struggling out there. Love the podcast.
Fuck the haters. And live your truth, man.
I am. Yeah, I don't give a fuck what people think.

Speaker 1 Unless, Unless, you know, if I did something wrong, I will fucking own up to it and apologize to the people that I hurt. But if I didn't do anything fucking wrong,

Speaker 1 yeah, I don't give a shit what, you know, nor do I take it seriously.

Speaker 1 All right, Pharaoh's got feminism right.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm probably going to love this

Speaker 1 because I'm a big fan of Broad's in position of power.

Speaker 2 I am.

Speaker 1 I am one of the most enlightened meatheads you're ever going to fucking meet.

Speaker 1 Oh, for fuck's sakes, Jesus fucking Christ, tackle the guy.

Speaker 1 What the fuck is that guy's name?

Speaker 1 That guy's last name was like the same thing as this Hawaiian thing that I'm supposed to do.

Speaker 1 I like Hawaiians.

Speaker 1 There's another fucking place my people just stuck their nose in. They shouldn't have done anything.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ, where was the containment?

Speaker 1 Guy dove at his fucking ankles.

Speaker 1 And okay.

Speaker 1 Here we go. They're just going to make me sweat it out here.
I don't even know what the fucking spread is. I think I had Seattle laying five and a half.

Speaker 1 There's 11 minutes left.

Speaker 1 We're up by fucking 23 points.

Speaker 1 And they're driving down the field. Yes, you still got to worry about it.

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 here we go.

Speaker 1 Pharaoh's got feminism right. Hi, Bill.
Fan from Egypt here. Hey, what's going on, dude?

Speaker 2 Good to hear.

Speaker 1 Every once in a while I hear from Egypt.

Speaker 1 I'd love to go there sometime.

Speaker 1 I have no interest in going to the pyramids. It just seems like there's going to be a long line.
I'd rather go in Cairo and get some

Speaker 1 killer food,

Speaker 1 coffee, hear some bands play.

Speaker 1 I'm a cafe person.

Speaker 1 A cafe with no line. That's my shit.

Speaker 1 I love my wife to death, but Jesus Christ, she will go to one of those Instagram places. And you go to one of those Instagram places, and there's a whole fucking line.
I call them Instagram zombies.

Speaker 1 They're all just standing there. Like, we went to this fucking Instagram place, and then, of course, it was great, but there was a super long line.

Speaker 1 And we go to stand in line, and I'm just going, like,

Speaker 1 I literally go to my wife, I go, This one of these Instagram places, right? And that's what I was thinking. And right as I was thinking this shit,

Speaker 1 the food came, you know, because these people were eating out on the out on the sidewalk,

Speaker 1 and the food came, right? And the lady sets it down, and the woman there goes,

Speaker 1 Oh my god, it's so cute

Speaker 1 you motherfucker that wasn't a catch and they ran a play too that was a good mood that looked like it was only one foot and bounce

Speaker 1 ten minutes to go um

Speaker 1 yeah he didn't catch that one

Speaker 1 well maybe he did

Speaker 1 That would have been worth looking at a review. Give it up for the Cardinals.
Getting up to the line really quickly. Throwing a fucking pass at the back shoulder for a motherfucking touchdown.

Speaker 1 There you go. 41-21.

Speaker 1 I would be nervous, but there's absolutely no defense in the second half of this game.

Speaker 1 Anyway,

Speaker 1 plowing ahead here.

Speaker 1 So this person says, hi, Bill, fan from Egypt here.

Speaker 1 I don't know if you've been following the news, but last week Egypt opened the biggest museum in the world, and suddenly everybody here is talking about the Pharaohs again.

Speaker 1 And I've been thinking, I think the Pharaohs actually got feminism right.

Speaker 1 Oh my god, they kicked an extra point. Jesus Christ, you never fucking see that anymore.

Speaker 1 Like, ask any Egyptian today to name one influential Egyptian woman from the last thousand years who wasn't somebody's wife and nobody has an answer. But ask them them about ancient Egypt

Speaker 1 oh my god I can't say any

Speaker 1 hats put

Speaker 1 no hat shepsut

Speaker 1 nef nefertiti Cleopatra Hollywood

Speaker 1 Elizabeth Taylor playing an Egyptian there everybody knows them nobody knows who their husbands were even in the West you read about World War II you you don't hear a woman's name.

Speaker 1 Today, Japan, Mexico, and the EU, half of Europe has women running the place.

Speaker 1 Well, then how come we're still fucking going in such a crazy direction? I thought if we let them run shit, everything was going to be good now.

Speaker 1 I guess there's not enough of them. Anyway, even in the U.S., your runner-up was a woman.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was a missed opportunity. This flim flam guy instead.

Speaker 1 It feels like the world has split into two extreme camps. The West is forcing women into everything just to hit the quota, and in the East, we're acting like they don't exist.

Speaker 1 I don't know. There's been a lot of pushback.

Speaker 1 The radicalized left

Speaker 1 towards the end of last decade has made the radicalized right in my country feel like they're in the middle. And they're not.
They're just as insane.

Speaker 1 You know, say my power outs.

Speaker 1 I mean, as nuts as that was it was fucking it got just now it's just as crazy to the right and they think that they're fucking sane they're out of their minds they're out of their fucking minds um

Speaker 1 we need sane people on the right and left to to to to settle it down to listen to each other to respect one another

Speaker 1 to understand that it's the united states

Speaker 1 I don't know. I blame it all on the fucking internet.
It just pits people against each other. Like I said, I see it now.
Comedians trashing other comedians

Speaker 1 like publicly is insane. Fucking insane.

Speaker 1 Anyway, but I think ancient Egyptians got the balance right. They were like, look,

Speaker 1 whoever's best gets the job. And it just happened that most of the time it was men.

Speaker 1 But every couple.

Speaker 1 You know, I didn't expect that. I thought you were going feminism.
That was a nice sit-own lady right there.

Speaker 1 But every couple of centuries, some woman showed up who was just better than everybody else. And people would totally find every couple of centuries.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 1 They built her temples and statues and all the other shit they used to do. There's an interesting festival that I know about recently that ancient Egyptians used to have.

Speaker 1 During the annual Nile flood, they'd pick the prettiest woman in the country, toss them in the river, and then all the men would gather and masturbate in the river.

Speaker 1 What the fuck fuck are you talking about? Was this whole thing just a joke?

Speaker 1 Anyway, big fan of the podcast and everything you do.

Speaker 1 Love to you and your family. Have a great day and go fuck yourself.
Wait a minute. Was that just all bullshit? That's fucking hilarious.

Speaker 1 That was like the most passive-aggressive thing ever.

Speaker 1 I thought that was going to be totally pro-woman and just going like, no, they picked who was best. And every couple of centuries, there would be a woman that had their shit together.

Speaker 1 All right, you got me. I'm not going to lie to you.
I thought that that was a legit email, and it turns out you were just fucking with me.

Speaker 1 Anyway.

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I like men and women

Speaker 1 before they get into power.

Speaker 1 And then I just feel like when you get into power, you don't really have the power as much as you are now obligated to do the shit that the real people in power, real people in power, you better fucking do this shit or you get a convertible ride in fucking Dallas.

Speaker 1 That's kind of like what I feel. That's all I'm saying.
I just feel like,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 you will do what they want you to fucking do or else you will pay the consequences. But I don't think they necessarily have to whack anybody anymore.

Speaker 1 I think the amount of fucking damage that they can do to you just on on the internet, just, you know,

Speaker 1 starting rumors and fucking, I think you can just easily steal an election now.

Speaker 1 I mean, that shit was wild. We just voted in California.

Speaker 1 The commercial was on fucking TV saying, saying that claiming Republicans were stealing elections, which is not legal. And TV, the rules of libel and slander exist.

Speaker 1 And the Republican Party did not sue over that. So it's basically they were.
They were stealing fucking, like, what are we doing?

Speaker 1 And then in other states, they were voting the same thing, going to the Democrats, the Red States, going to the Democrats, you're stealing these fucking elections.

Speaker 1 And nobody sued.

Speaker 1 So my question is: is this part of a whole big division thing?

Speaker 1 I also think people are such fucking babies now that

Speaker 1 if their person doesn't win the election, they immediately assume that it was stolen.

Speaker 1 But I will say, the orange guy was kind of saying, hey, the Tesla guy really fucking, he really did his job there.

Speaker 4 He's just kind of.

Speaker 1 But then he just says shit. So, like, you don't know.

Speaker 1 It's like.

Speaker 1 It's really brilliant. Like, I feel like he could, he just babbles and says so much crazy shit.

Speaker 1 I kind of feel like in the middle of a speech, he could literally confess to a murder and it wouldn't like.

Speaker 1 What was that Will Farrell movie?

Speaker 1 Where he was out on the dance floor and that band was singing hit songs and they kept throwing F-bombs in, and everybody on the dance floor would sort of like turn their head, like, did he

Speaker 1 say the F-word?

Speaker 1 Like, I feel like Trump has that ability that he can just fucking

Speaker 1 say anything. He can admit to crimes.

Speaker 1 He can admit to sort of be kind of attracted to another man, but not really, but kind of.

Speaker 1 But I love women.

Speaker 2 It's fucking.

Speaker 1 It's really, it's a wild time, everybody.

Speaker 1 Speaking of wild times, it's 41 to 22.

Speaker 1 My team has scored three points in the second half, and the other fucking team...

Speaker 1 What do they score? They scored

Speaker 1 two touchdowns and a two-point conversion.

Speaker 1 They've scored 15 points.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 1 Well, thank God we scored fucking 38 in the first half. All right, that is the podcast, everybody.
You don't need to listen to my degenerate fucking gambling shit.

Speaker 1 I love this coach for the fucking Cardinals. He is not letting you see his face.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ, how are you that fucking overweight playing professional sports?

Speaker 1 That's unbelievable. Like, what's going to happen in your, you know,

Speaker 1 you got to get the fucking weight off.

Speaker 1 You don't have to order every appetizer. Sorry.
Anyway, just looking at these linemen.

Speaker 1 All right, so we're down on the fucking 19.

Speaker 1 Kick a field goal here.

Speaker 1 That would be 44,

Speaker 1 seven minutes to go. All right, I'm good.
I'm good. You never know.
Damn, plenty of time left.

Speaker 1 You know, before the game, I saw the guy. He hit like an 80-yarder.

Speaker 1 All right, that's the podcast. Go fuck yourselves, and I will check in on you on Thursday.

Speaker 6 Cal State East Bay was founded on a belief that every student holds incredible potential.

Speaker 6 And when that potential is unlocked, doors open to opportunity, to purpose, to a better future for their families and communities.

Speaker 6 Our students are modern-day pioneers, breaking new ground and paving the way for generations to come.

Speaker 6 Here, they find an intellectual oasis, a place to pause, reflect, and rise, gaining the knowledge and confidence to make their mark on the world. Enroll today at csuestbay.edu slash start.

Speaker 6 You ever sit there staring at your plate thinking, why can't this pasta be just a little healthier without ruining it? Yeah, me too. That's why I started using Monch Monch.
It's like a food wingman.

Speaker 6 It steps in when your meal is trying to sabotage you. It blocks extra carbs and sugars before your body gets them, adds fiber your gut actually loves, and keeps your blood sugar from roller coaster.

Speaker 6 So yeah, I still eat the pasta. I just don't pay for it later.
Make your food work for you, not against you. Go to monchmonch.shop and see what your meals could be with a little backup.