Monday Morning Podcast 1-27-25

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's time for the Monday Morning Podcast for Monday, January 27th, 2025. What's going on? How are ya? How's it going? How are ya? Alright, well, it is Sunday afternoon, January 26th when I'm recording this.
The fucking Philadelphia Eagles just handled, absolutely mauled the Washington Commanders. Too much for them.
Too much defense. Too much offense.
Too much everything. But what a run the Washington Commanders had.
You know what's funny? I like the white guys I know my age. You're like, dude, I'll just never be able to call them that name.
It must be really hard. It's got to be really fucking hard.
Jesus Christ. Is that your biggest fucking complaint in life? I've been getting all the fucking boo birds coming at me this week.
You know? Somebody sent me a thing. They replayed that thing I did on Kimmel where I was making fun of all these people who were like this fire was mismanaged out here.
Which, by the way, it's fucking raining out here. Thank God.
Thank God. It's raining out here.
You know? Obviously we need to prevent more of them, obviously. And then also to knock down some of this fucking crap in the air dude because the air quality out here is uh hell dude it's brutal just think of all the plastic spatulas that are out there you know what i mean just all dashboards you know all the plastic shit you have computers all that wire all of that stuff just got fucking burned and uh oh my god and people lost their houses and they got to stay here trying to find a place to live and breathe that shit in so believe me we needed the rain and once again the fire department did a great job everybody did a great fucking job and all of these fucking assholes like somebody sent me this thing from the LA Times.
The LA Times. The LA Times after the fire, right? After the fire, the fire still.
Everybody after the fire knows what we should have done. You know what we should have done? Hey, LA Times, you know what you should have done? You should have wrote that fucking article every fucking week before the fire.
If you wanted to do something, anybody can write the article afterward. You know? Now there's going to be mudslides and they're going to be, you know what they should have done.
That Monday morning after the disaster, what you should have done. I might be nuts here, but I don't think any politicians can get anything done because the other side won't work with them.

They're like, well, we can't have them accomplish something.

If they accomplish something, then they're going to look good.

And if they look good, then they're going to get elected,

and then we don't.

And if we're not elected, then how will we accept bribes

from corporations and make 200 grand a year

but somehow be worth 60 million?

Haven't you guys noticed that at all? Like whenever we're like, hey, we want to do this project. Immediately, everybody, oh, is that going to cost? You're going to do that when we still need to do this? And then everybody just yells at each other.
All right, everybody has known for a long time what the fuck was going to happen out here and what needed to be done, but nobody wanted to pay for it. There's also that.
All of you Monday morning quarterback fire people weighing in about what should have done and what they shouldn't have fucking done. It's just like, you know, it all goes back to the cunts all the way up at the top who don't fucking pay taxes and want to own and control fucking everything

and then don't want to pay.

The only thing they want to do is pay off a politician.

That's the only thing that they want to pay.

And then what happens is regular people fucking suffer.

All right?

I'm not going to talk about it anymore.

I talk about this more than my Kansas City Chiefs conspiracy theory. I know.
I'm a fucking broken record here. So let's get out of that.
Alright? The time to have done something was before. It didn't happen.
So now we need leaders. We don't need people sitting around pointing fingers.
Trying to fucking, I don't know. I don't know what.
What are you trying to win? Blaming. Anyway, I really feel like that's how the world's going to end.
When the asteroid's coming, it's just that he's going, well, these fucking liberals, if they let us build the ray gun, well, that's because the religious right. Boom.
That's going to be the end of it. Anyway, so I went out to the desert with two great friends of mine last night.
And I went and I saw Johnny Mathis, something I've been meaning to do. Every time I go out to the desert, I see he's performing out there.
He's 89 years old. I was like, I got to go fucking see this guy.
So me and my two buddies, we go out there. We get a nice steak dinner.
They treat us great at the casino and everything. We go in.
You know, I was with other like performers and shit. And we were all just laughing going like, I don't think I've ever seen the front of this casino.
And the people like, dude, you've played here twice. It's like, I've never been here.
This is amazing. And just it's fucking awesome.
We were walking around. We went to the sports bar.
I watched the Kansas Wildcats game. I taped it.
I still haven't. Kansas was like up by five and then it was time to go get a, we got an amazing steak dinner.
And then we got then we went into the showroom and we sat down and it was like at least a 20 piece orchestra. Like, I don't know what kind of money Johnny was laying out for these guys, but he had a whole string section, a whole section of horns, big band, the drummer was killer, the musical director, the piano player was amazing, the percussionist, everybody was crushing it.
And out comes Johnny Mathis. And I'm sitting there in the friggin', I don't know, third or fourth row.
And I couldn't believe it. And then he just fucking...
He just launches into, you know, chances are... Because I win.
And I was just, Holy shit. It's Johnny Mennon.

And he sounded fucking great.

And, you know, he's really gracious.

Just old school class.

Dressed to the nines.

You know, 89 years old.

And then like his mic control.

The whole, just all of that old showbiz class.

You dress up.

You wear a jacket. You look up.
You wear a jacket.

You look nice.

And he came out.

He was totally gracious with everybody who was there.

And the crowd was, you know, it was obviously an older crowd or whatever.

But underrated, man.

Going to go see these legends at a casino.

You're really doing yourself a disservice if you don't go see these people.

So I remember I saw Don Rickles towards the end of his life out there i saw and uh um what's his face oh tony orlando opened up and he killed uh and then this was johnny mathis had no opener um but he took a break in the middle and then this comic came out uh brad upton who absolutely destroyed i want to tell you his jokes but i don't want to burn them but he was like worked totally clean and absolutely murdered um really enjoyed his set and then uh johnny came out in a tuxedo to close it out sang all of these hits and he was very very gracious, kept thanking the band and everything.

And then I think his last number was Let the Good Times Roll.

And then he just walked on.

He just was like, you know, I've been listening to that guy since I was a kid.

Like the first thing was that Johnny Mathis Christmas record my parents had.

Just hear those sleigh bells ring-a-ling, ting-ting, ting-a-ling. There he is.
Right there. You can just drive a couple hours out to a casino.
If he's in town and go see him, you should definitely do it. They treated us like a million bucks there.
All right, I want to make sure I say the casino name right. The Agua Caliento Resort Casino Spa in Rancho Mirage.
We were out there and they treated us like kings. Then we got to go see one of the legends, the great singer, songwriters of all time, Johnny Mathis.
I still can't believe it. That's what I kept thinking when I was there.
I was like, I can't believe I'm in the same room with that. That's Johnny fucking Mathis.
This guy has been doing it since like the 1950s. Like a 70-year career.
And like, I like Brad's set so much, I looked him up and he was saying how he has been working with Johnny Mathis for 17 years, which means he got the gig when Johnny Mathis was 72. And he's got to be thinking, all right, maybe I can do this for, you know, anywhere from three to five years and then he's going to retire.
17 years later, he still got a gig. and then just all those musicians that Johnny was employing was just, it was just really a great thing to see, a great thing to see.
And then on top of all that, it rained today. So it's been nothing but great, a great day.
The Eagles crushed the Washington Redskins. It was my daughter's like-birthday party, like the one that she had with her friends.
So we had this video game cheeseburger party. So the kids were just all bouncing off the wall, and I had the game on in the background.
And I saw the commanders. Kind of made it close a couple of times, and then the Eagles just sort of ran away with it.
I have not watched the Kansas City Chiefs game. I think that's on now.
But, you know, I was thinking about all of that stuff of like now it's like the Taylor Swift. Everybody's going to be like, oh, you know, because they were cutting it like Bradley Cooper a couple of times in the crowd, which is so funny.
Just like the ratings. It's like it works with Taylor Swift.
Is Bradley Cooper the Taylor Swift of the Eagles, right? And I'm like, you know, what is, like, they just keep doing the same thing over and over again. Tom was with Giselle, fucking the tight ends with Taylor, right? Kelsey's with Taylor, it's the same, right? This fucking works, let's just keep doing this shit, right? And I was trying to think, like, when, like, the first time they really started showing celebrities in the crowd.
Sort of the history of that was at the Lakers game. And the first guy there was like Jack Nicholson was there first.
And he was there in like the late 70s. I want to say he was there before Kareem.
Maybe Kareem got there. Maybe Kareem was already.
He was there in like the the late 70s. And he got courtside seats in.
You don't understand. The fucking 1970s, the only fucking people that were in the stands were sports fans.
There wasn't even there was no corporate boxes. There was no luxury boxes.
There was nothing. It was just a fucking arena full of a bunch of meathead sports fans, right? So if you were at the game, you were there because you wanted to be.
Sorry, I was taking my jacket off, and I hit some fucking thing on the side of the phone. Anyway, so if you were at the game, you were at the game because you wanted to be.
You were like, you know, a sports fan. So Jack Nicholson was the first guy.
And then the Lakers got Magic Johnson. And all of a sudden, the Showtime Lakers, Pat Riley with the great fucking hair, they win in 1980, and, you know, but they wouldn't cut to Jack all the time, but you knew that he was there, and then it kind of became like this thing to do, but it always made sense with the Lakers, because they were in Hollywood, so they would cut to the crowd, and Diane Cannon, and all these people would be there.
And I can admit, as a Celtics fan

it wasn't annoying because you were kind of like

like, wow, they're in

Hollywood. And the Lakers

uniformed, you know, they were gold. It looked

like the sun. And it

was just like, I don't know if you

this is weird for people to hear now

the way they got us all divided in the

United States, how we're divided.

Like people used to look at California like it was a dream. You know what I mean? Oh my God, the orange groves and the sunshine.
And, you know, people did talk about the smog by then in the 70s. But the East Coast used to look at California with like envy of, oh my God, they're living in paradise.
look at the palm trees and the women are all gorgeous I mean you didn't live out here so you didn't know what it was it was just your idea of it and then you'd see you know Jack Nicholson was courtside and Diane Cannon was gorgeous and then later it's like Paula Abdul was a Laker girl and then she becomes like this pop star and you know I remember I think I saw Eddie Murphy at like a game I was just like that like like and that like was leading into me getting into this business being like wow man that's and that was like my idea that's what being famous was you know what I mean you wore like a uh you know sunglasses and you went to like a Lakers game and you sat on the court or whatever you, you know? And that's like what was being, so that's where it started. And then, but I think when it, the first time when I felt like it really got out of control was not, you know, how many times they cut to Taylor Swift, which she really doesn't have control over, but was with Drake.
Remember when the Raptors went on that run? And I always felt bad because the Raptors had this super fan, right? That Middle Eastern dude, right? With the fucking, the turban. And he went to every home game, every away game, when they sucked.
And he was just a super fan. He had great energy and everybody loved him.
And then when all of a sudden they had the team and they went on the run, Drake had the Jack Nicholson tickets. And then they just cut to him and they never showed the other guy.
And they kept cutting to Drake. And Drake was like walking out on the court like he was an assistant coach.
So I think that's the first time that shit started happening. But I'm starting to feel like that's going to be like a thing now like if taylor swift keeps increasing the ratings of the chiefs or helping them out or whatever then these other teams are gonna be like okay well who's famous that's from you know who's who's fucking famous that's from Pittsburgh or who's famous that's from whatever and then you're gonna go to a game and then they're just gonna keep cutting okay here's our famous person or whatever you know so uh I don't know it's like it is it is like a different thing so um I want to see this this you know i'm taping the game i really want to see this kansas city buffalo game and i just really just fucking hope the nfl can you just make it a football game because these are two incredibly talented teams with a bunch of incredible players can you please stop with the marketing and just let the best team fucking win so the people that you you've really forgot about, your fans, the reason why you've been around for over 100 fucking years, your fucking fans can actually watch a fucking game.
All right? While you do the flyovers and cut to the pop stars and fucking all the other goddamn bullshit that you're going to do during the guy and fucking stand up for cancer and fucking pink jerseys and all of this shit can you just fucking let us watch a game where it's decided on the field i would i would really enjoy that out of a chiefs game because i feel like it's been quite a fucking while since i've seen that because i really want to see you know you want me to buy into like this whole thing that patrick mahons is as great as you say and then i want to see him actually win the fucking game without the laundry. All right, there.
I said I wasn't going to talk about it, but I did. Does Josh Allen, bigger than fucking John Wayne, but still has his six-year-old boyish good looks swear his face looks like it's, it's Photoshopped onto like Paul Bunyan's body.
Um, like if he wasn't famous, I bet if he went out to get a beer, they would still ask him for an ID. Um, it's not a bad thing.
It's not a bad thing. And I think in the future, you know, when, men start doing plastic surgery at the level that some of these Instagram whores are doing it.

I think one of one of the like. There's going to be some sort of Josh Allen.
They're going to call it the Josh Allen serum.

And you can be like, what's that? That's like you play tackle football for almost 30 years and your face still looks like you're in the fourth grade. You can you could sell that to a billionaire.
I think you could get that off the ground. You know, if you know, you did the right sort of song and dance on Shark Tank.
how diabolical would that be if you actually came in with some young forever serum on the uh shark tank and you got all of them to buy into it because there's hair plugs on that show right there's a lot of stuff going on in that show right for these people still to look like they're they're young and virile right and then they all buy into it and then you fucking you give it to them and then that's how you take them out luigi style you know and then that then that becomes like a thing right regular people taking out ceos becomes a thing and the media does nothing to stop it they just over hype it you the way they did school shootings, the way they didn't give a fuck about our kids as much as they cared about their own fucking ratings.

You know, and getting the camera and the fucking devastated parents faces.

They did it the same way, you know, as opposed to, you know, toe in the company line when a CEO gets whacked.

Like if they treated them the way that they treat like fucking regular people. All right, Bill, do you have anything to talk about? I sold my car.
I finally had to sell my Jaguar. I had it almost, uh, almost a little over eight years.
And, uh, you know, it just started being a Jaguar and I put a whole bunch of fucking fucking money into it. I made sure the person who bought it even did the full tank of gas.
I'm one of those people. You know, I got every little fucking bullshit thing fixed because I love that fucking car.
And the person that I sold it to was also a Jaguar person. And they loved the car.
So I was very happy. I'm like, I can't believe how sad I get um and how attached i get attached to things the same way i get attached to people it's fucked you know what i mean like but then when i finally like sell the thing it only bugs me for a couple weeks and i'm like you know it's kind of cool not to have that you know i get i can kind of move on to something else so um i don't know it was just i i learned a lot with that car and one of the things i've learned from mechanics is whatever time they tell you to change your oil do it twice as fast so if you got like this synthetic oil and they're like you only need to change your oil once a fucking year do it twice a year or if you're doing the old school oil and they say every 3 000 miles do it every 1500 miles and i learned that listening to mechanics and i saw this little old lady little old lady um she had a uh a car from the 1950s and it was still running.

And they said, what do you do?

She goes, I change the oil every 1,500 miles.

That's something I think should be fucking illegal.

To tell your own customers who just gave you fucking money,

you don't give them the right information on how to maintain what you gave them.

So it'll break down twice as fucking fast.

So you can sell them another one.

Um,

I don't know.

I,

you know,

it's the kind of thing.

I don't think it's right.

Um,

so anyway,

I'm going to be down at the comedy store tonight,

uh,

running my hour.

Cause,

uh,

tomorrow night I'm doing a co-headlining gig with Shaneane gillison i don't think i've ever worked with him in this capacity i've never done a theory gig with him i was supposed to do the hollywood bowl with him and then i think he did the tom brady roast or something like that um i did a spot on seth rogan seth rogan had this fucking epic night last year during the uh the netflix um netflix comedy festival whatever the hell they call it and uh it was it was seth post malone snoop dogg it was just insane, insane lineup. And they threw me on like last second.
But anyways, I want to say Shane was supposed to be on that, but he was doing the Tom Brady roast, which I think got like nine zillion fucking hits or something like that. So I think he made the right choice.
But anyways, I'm really excited to work with him. But I got to make sure I don't suck.
So tonight I'm i'm going to the gym doing some cardio gonna try out uh some new bits that i got and um yeah so i'm now like debating i think i might sell my f250 also and the only reason why i'm gonna sell it is because i don't like new cars like the way that thing that truck is not my friend the engine is my friend the body the truck itself is but within that truck is a spy and it's constantly trying to figure out what music I'm listening to what I'm talking about though I don't want a car that's spying on me is that like asking too much i'm just gonna

i'm just gonna be driving old cars for the rest of my life so i found this 1970

oh jesus bill this 1970 um uh cadillac el dorado that was like this aqua blue or green

white cream interior you can find it on Bring It Trailer.

Somebody bought it for like 33 grand.

You know?

Fucking white cream interior.

It was fucking gorgeous.

And people are like, where are you going to park that?

It's like, wherever the fuck I want.

Wherever the fuck I want.

Somebody steals it, I don't give a shit.

You know, what am I going to do? Then it's an excuse to get a different one i'll get insurance you know what i mean insurance will cover that if everybody's car gets stolen then they go we're not paying anybody and we're keeping the fucking premiums and then by the way we're also going to raise everybody else's premium because all those cars got stolen even though we didn't take the fucking hit and you know nobody's going to discipline us because we're insurance companies and we're too big to be disciplined it always goes back to that it's always going to go back to that just know that it always goes back to that and that there's nothing i can do about it i've entered these years um so uh let's talk cars i like i'm a big caddy guy i like the 65 coupe de bill i like a 67 to 70 eldorado and then like i never used to like the 68 69 coupe de bill and there's something about it i'm really starting to like it and then there's the early 70 the one that's after that the next generation those ones are cool too the one i remember seeing those cadillacs first time i saw those i want to say that i saw them at elvis the footage of elvis's funeral they had some white there's some all these different cadillacs because he was a big cadillac guy so i like those i like a 65 buick riviera with the clamshell i like the big cars or like the mid-sized big ones the uh ford I'll tell you, you know, it's a great car. If you can find it is the first Dirty Harry.
Detective Callahan, Clint Eastwood's car. I think it was just it was just what they used to call those where it was just the basic like a Ford custom ford custom it was a um it's funny it was just like it was the the base model four-door sedan i think it was called a ford 500 and his was like midnight blue four-door cop car and um you know all of those guys on those gas monkey shows like for some reason they don't

like four-door cars so those things all you know went to the junkyard and got crushed or just rotted out or whatever so you can't you can't find them anywhere like um i remember i had a buddy of mine he was looking for a four-door uh hard top 59 uh chevy impala so i had this car guy looking for him he's like dude these things are fucking unicorns man he's like i cannot find like it he goes you want a two-door he goes they're all over the place i can find you a zillion those it has to be four-door and i was like oh you know it's his childhood. He wants it.
This is the thing that he wants or whatever. So it took him forever to find one.
But anyway, I'll tell you this. I have a weird feeling about Buffalo today.
I have a strange feeling that Buffalo is not going to be Buffalo.

But I don't know.

Do you honestly think that they're going to go in?

They already beat Kansas City once this year.

Are you going to beat Patrick Mahomes,

the Kansas City Chiefs, and that officiating crew,

and the NFL who just absolutely love them?

I don't know.

That's a tall fucking order.

That is a tall order.

So anyway, this is my last week out here in L.A.

before I go back to start rehearsal on the play.

It's actually been a good thing.

I've gotten in so many hangs with so many people.

That's why I went out to go see Johnny Mathis because two good friends of mine, I wanted to hang with them, um, before I left and I've been hitting all these food spots. Like I do this thing with my son, uh, donuts, uh, don't, uh, drum and donut days.
So we go over to, uh, pro drum shop on vine, the best drum store in Los Angeles, one of the best drum stores in the world.

And we go over there and my son gets so into playing.

Well, the first time I got over, he was so into playing the drums there that every time I would ask him to leave, he would get all like emotional.

So I finally had to like bribe him going, you want to get a donut? And he was like, a donut? I'm like, yeah. And he's like, yeah, right? It was the greatest idea ever.
So now it's called Drum and Donut Day. So we went there and we played some drums.
And he was playing the first beat you learn how to play. Boom, crack boom crack and he's just fucking he just has it he just fucking has it he's got great time and he doesn't give a fuck that there's people in the store he's not self-conscious i'm like really excited so i'm gonna try to teach him um you know don't that oh oh that oh that don't go that i'm gonna try to teach them, you know, don't that, oh, that, oh, that, don't, don't that.
I'm going to try to teach them that before I leave. And then I got all of this shit that I'm just going to be doing FaceTime and my kids while I'm away.
But I'll still see him one week a month and everything. I'm scheduling stuff, so I do see him, but that's going to be the worst part of it.
But the good part is I get to do a Broadway play, and I'm off book. I'm ready to go, and I'm very excited, and I hope to see you guys out there.
I believe it starts on, I think March 10th is when it starts. All right, and with that, I'm going to do some reads here for this week.
Let's see. All right.
Here we go. All right.
The reads for the week. Scrolling up.
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All right, Bill, great emails this week.

A lot of, about the Billy Corgan thing and questions about how much of it was a bit.

Okay.

What, you think my life's a fucking joke? All right. Chiefs complaining debunked.
I love when people say that. Chiefs complaining debunked.
Debunked what? Because you want it debunked? This is Chiefs complaining my opinion. What's going on there, Billy complain tits? first off i am not a chiefs fan and i'm a democrat but these liberals are out of their minds everybody does this so let's get that excuse out of the way for you dolphins fan here all right you sound like a cnn fox news nut, except with football when it comes to the complaining about the Chiefs and Mahomes.
Oh, well, you must not be watching them. You didn't watch that last drive and all that holding right in front of the referees.
You didn't see the guy take his helmet off in the end zone and the guy told him to put it back on. You didn't see a defensive coordinator calling a timeoutout so you're just going to say i sound like that and you're not i want you to address all of those rather than just doing the usual oh you got your tinfoil hat on geez somebody's getting into their feelings that's what people say when they can't refute what you're saying.
You yourself said you don't watch much football anymore and you just watch the... I was at the

Super Bowl. I was at the Super Bowl.
I don't know what to tell you, sir. For the most part.
So you're

forming your opinion based off of the national media painting a picture for you. No, I'm not.

I told you I was watching the game last week. I was so sick to my stomach.
I had to turn it off. I had to turn it off with the amount of times the officials just bail them out.
Did you listen to the beginning of this podcast where I was begging the NFL to let the Bills and Chiefs just play the game without them interfering? All right, this is all bullshit. You yourself, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, yourself, as a Patriot fan, I'm sure you're scared of Mahomes and the Chiefs catching up to your records.
I'm not. I don't care.
So, all you're doing is you're just, you're like CNN Foxs you're forming your opinions you're just a scared

Patriots fans dude you have not brought up one example of what everybody is talking about and

defending like are you going to tell me they weren't holding Bosa that guy didn't take his

helmet off the guy didn't call fucking timeout Mahomes isn't flopping out about you're going to

tell me that you you're not refuting any of that you just you just this is you're debunking it

Thank you. Mahomes isn't flopping out about you're going to tell me that you're not refuting any of that you just you just this is you're debunking it just making shit up this is what we're doing now to the actual numbers because math don't lie that's not true that isn't true math doesn't lie you can listen to two politicians talk about the same thing.
They can pull out numbers that support their arguments on the same issues. And the numbers will tell you the exact opposite thing.
I don't give a fuck. You find the shittiest college out there and they'll somehow work the numbers where they're somehow number one in something and that's why you should go to the school.
It doesn't have an opinion.

It's just right or wrong.

Oh, and let me grasp.

The way that you're doing these numbers agrees with you.

In 17 regular season games, the Chiefs have been penalized 94 times for 829 yards

for an average of 5.5 penalties for 49.7 yards per game,

while the teams they have averaged have played against were penalty. I understand.
Okay, you pick some numbers that are going to support your argument. All right.
I watched Trey Wingo pull out some numbers going like in crucial situations in a football game. Okay, he started that vague.
He goes, when it came down to it, he goes, Tom Brady was 46%. And all he said was the percentage.
He didn't say the numbers. Like 46% out of what? How many times out of how many times? Then he goes to Drew Brees.
Drew Brees was 50%. He was 3 out of 6.
And he ignores Tom Brady's because Tom Brady's numbers are all through the fucking roof. The guy went to the AFC championship like 58 fucking times.
Anybody can bat 500 in fucking baseball if you're fucking looking at 20 at bats. You gotta go 10 out of 20.
If're hot you can do it do it for a whole fucking season so trey wingo like moves these numbers around and then of course he lands on patrick mahomes like patrick mahomes is seven for fucking seven and it's like seven for seven he lost the super bowl so you're deciding fucking got, like, what is the important thing? Like, this is what I don't like about your numbers, sir, is your mind is already made up before you give these numbers. While you're accusing me of doing the same thing, you're going to do it to me and be like, see, the numbers don't fucking lie.
Guess what, buddy? The film doesn't lie. So fuck you.
I'm not reading this shit. Fuck you.
I get it. You like fucking Patrick Mahomes.
I like it. Okay? I get it.
I get it. I get it.
He was immediately sold to me as, this is going to be the greatest fucking quarterback you've ever fucking seen. And I've got to be honest with you, I've been watching football for 50 years.

He's not the greatest quarterback I've ever seen.

He's the most successful.

And 28, by being the age of 28, I'll give him that.

But it's not the same fucking game.

It's not the same fucking game.

Okay, the game I was watching, you could beat the fuck out of the quarterback and the owners weren't involved in gambling in Las Vegas.

It's changed a little bit.

Baseball has changed a little bit.

You couldn't be roided out of your fucking mind for 10 years.

Right?

You had to eat coffee beans and have a sarsaparilla.

Everything has changed.

Listen, can we just agree to disagree?

Okay?

Can we just fucking agree to disagree?

I don't want to fucking sit here and go through all of these.

Out of respect for you, I will continue reading this.

So the math shows that it isn't bad at all.

And you are falling for the national media trap. Hence the CNN Fox News.
Oh, I thought I was watching it. I thought I was watching the games.
Evidently, I'm not watching the games. And evidently, I'm watching just people on Instagram.
And I'm going, oh, that's what it is. Yeah.
OK. All right.
I don't do the BetMGM podcast with Paul Verzi and bet four games a week. Yeah.
I don't I don't watch it all. Yeah.
OK. I'll go with that.
All right. Also, Mahomes has six roughing the passer calls against this year to Jalen.
Five.

Terrible fucking stat.

Terrible fucking stat.

When your offensive line is allowed to hold,

how the fuck are you going to fucking hurt the guy to begin with?

This is ridiculous.

The Chiefs have the most offensive holding calls against them this season as well.

You see what I'm saying now?

No, I don't see what you're saying, I don't see what you're saying.

I don't see what you're saying.

How come you're ignoring the fact that they've always been penalized

for fucking being held except during the playoffs when it really counts?

Haven't you seen that stat?

Are you going to look at those numbers or are you just going to ignore that?

I don't know.

As far as the Taylor Swift stuff,

it can be annoying at times,

but it's not as bad as you

and the other make it out to be.

Yes, according to you.

Most NFL game broadcasts

are three hours and three minutes

and 15 or so.

She might have a total

of three to four minutes a game.

So please just stop complaining about this.

Watch the game when you can.

Inform your own opinion.

Oh my God, this guy's reprimanding me.

I'm a big fan of you, so don't go

too hard on me, LOL. Looking forward

to seeing you soon. Buddy.

Buddy. I'm

watching the fucking game.

Okay? And I've always

bitched about things that I don't like

in the game. I've been right

sometimes. I've been wrong other times.

Just because you don't share, like nothing, you didn't

prove anything in this

other than the fact that you have the opposite

point of view and you pick some numbers that support your point of view, but you're completely ignoring. I've never seen a defensive coordinator call fucking timeout and they give it to him.
Whatever. What am I going to convince you? Okay, you know what, dude? Yeah, you're absolutely're absolutely right you're absolutely right the NFL is actually a sports league and even though they call themselves an entertainment league the fact that they're involved in gambling now that's not going to affect things whatsoever not at all not at all not at all it's not weird at all that after Peyton Manning and Tom Brady retire, all of a sudden this new team just immediately, immediately, immediately, and it was the exact same blueprint as their business beforehand.
The same way the NBA, you know, oh my God, the Celtics and Lakers and Jordan is over. And then immediately we're into the pile-on error of teams to just artificially create what naturally fucking happened.
Evidently, the way I'm looking that is wrong. And in the 2000s, when I was saying that these fucking games are rigged and they're shaving points, everybody said I was, you know, put on your whatever, your tinfoil hat.
And then a fucking guy got busted for doing it. And then they said it was just him, bullshit it wasn't just him it was a bunch of people he was the oswald guy all right i know i know i sound fucking crazy okay you know you know what these these leagues are on the up and up haven't you seen like former nfl players former nfl players are saying what the fuck troy aikman said what the fuck in the booth during a broadcast.
That pass interference where he barely touched the small of his back. You know, you put your hand, they're going to get you for that.
What the fuck? All right, great. Well, you crunched some fucking numbers and I still do not agree with you.
issues with comedy in greece i had a great time in greece hello bill hello billy what are you doing i hope you're well my name is jim and i'm a listener of your podcast i'd like to share some factual information about a recent comedy related development in greece and ask for your opinion on it by the way i also love how the Chiefs fan only went with holding. The non-Chiefs Dolphins fan.
Like, that's the only stat. Out of all the penalties that are out there, illegal motion, pass interference, roughing the pass, all of this shit, you pick fucking one or two to support your argument, and then you're just going to say it's debunked because you said it was? All right, I guess it's debunked.
I hope you're well. My name is Jim and I'm a listener of your podcast.
I'd like to share some factual information about a recent comedy-related development in Greece and ask for your opinion on it. A show called...
I can't, I don't know how to say it. Pest to...
Samata? Inspired by the British panel game Would I Lie to You was scheduled for multiple performances at a theater in Athens initially. Its first four announced dates featured 17 male comedians and no women.
An official poster was released with only one male name listed. After the poster went public, several people on social media raised concerns about the absence of female comedians.

In response, nine female stand-up comedians in Greece issued a collective statement saying no woman had received a specific invitation before the show was announced. They noted that the situation reflects broader issues of access and representation in comedy.
Subsequently, four male comedians scheduled to appear withdrew, stating various reasons such as lack of information about the lineup or discomfort with how the show was organized. Additional participants also pulled out, including some who were slated to join later dates.
The organizers posted an apology citing poor planning. They offered refunds to anyone who had purchased tickets and announced that any performer could drop out if they chose.
Eventually, the entire show was canceled. Many discussions followed about how an all-male lineup came about and why no adjustments were made earlier.
Some pointed out that later performances would have included women, though the initial announcement did not. I'm reaching out because I value the way you analyze and break down scenarios on your podcast.
I'd be interested to hear any thoughts you might have on how such a situation can occur and what approaches comedians, producers, or audiences might take when something like this happens. Thanks.
Thank you for taking the time to read the message. I appreciate your candid perspective.
I look forward to any comment you might want to add to share to the podcast. Best of regard.
I don't know. Like, sometimes those things happen because of the reasons people think they're happening.

Like there's racism, sexism, homophobia, nepotism and all that. And other times they just happen because the people involved only interact with the people they hire.
like if you get a bunch of men to fucking

run something there's going to be a bunch of

men being hired

for something like interact with the people they hire. Like if you get a bunch of men to fucking run something,

there's going to be a bunch of men being hired for something like that. Unless it's a titty,

blah. Sorry.
And then I feel like, like if you had a bunch of women running that, if it was only

women running that, it would, it would reflect that. But it wouldn't, but it wouldn't just be

all women. I don't think it would be that.
So, I don't know. It sucks that it got canceled.
And it also sucks that people running shit, there's a fine line between listening to what people are saying and then just completely caving and losing the integrity of what you're doing. that's that's sort of the balance like obviously you know if you're putting something together you want to you know try to include everybody all depends on what the fuck you're doing right um what it's gonna look like but you should do that but i don't understand it seems like by in the end the people that doing it were like, I don't think there's any fucking way we're going to make everybody happy.
Just fuck this. Let's just do something else or start over somewhere else.
But like, I don't know where you guys are at socially over there. I mean, you are Greece.
Isn't that where democracy started? So I'm a little surprised that, um, you know what? I'm not surprised. surprised i had literally no opinion of it i had no idea how shit was running over there so um i don't know i will say it's a hard fucking thing i don't know it's a difficult thing because like when it comes to writing they always say write what you know so then you write what you know and then it looks like you so then as a white guy it's like what's this fucking white guy shit it's like i'm a white guy i write white guy shit i don't i don't want the fuck to tell you what if i what am i supposed to write non-white guy shit then i go well who the fuck are you to speak for the fucking da da da right you know then you get the reality is, though, none of this shit would be happening if the world was fair.

But it isn't.

And it's never going to be fair.

If you just had women run it, that's what it would look like.

It would look like their bullshit.

And then, you know, I mean, Jesus Christ, look how women run a fucking relationship.

Look at the power dynamic the average married man has.

And women consider that fair. So they're not fair people either.
So, but like outside the house, like for the most part, men are running shit. So I guess you have to be more aware of that stuff.
I mean, it's kind of vague. I don't know what the comedy thing was, but it just, I just think in the end, it sucks that they didn't, the whole thing fucking went away.
It's actually kind of funny too. So, I don't know.
My opinion on all of that stuff is, I always like, I never tell performers what to do. It's just, the only thing I tell them what to do is just go do what you want to do.
And don't listen to people, you know, I don't know about that joke. I don't know about that.
It's like, dude, if you think it's funny, go out and do it. Then you fucking decide.
Okay? It's one thing if you're going around, hey, man, what do you think about this? You're asking. But people come up to you with unsolicited shit you know it's you really got to have a filter like where is this coming from are they really trying to help me or are they you know are they hardcore about some issue so they can't even step back and see that i'm not doing anything against their cause or are they envious and jealous and they're trying to fuck up what it is that I'm doing? I don't know.
So there is that element of it. And then I think you as a performer, I think, I don't know, you got to try to like, like empathy is a great thing in general to try to figure stuff out.
Like say like whenever there's like a joke that i'm doing that i feel is like outside me right i just go to the whoever it's about i just go to them and say what i'm doing like what do you think about this how do you think about like take like old dads like that scene in the car with the the rap scene where bokeem you know you know that that whole fucking. Like that went through a number of different versions.
And my first version, you know, all my black friends were like, I don't know about that version. I mean, I see what you're trying to do.
I, you know, and then I got somebody like, I think that's funny. But then there was too many people being like, you know, I don't know.
So I was like, I don't think I'm there. So I just kept listening and then rewriting and rewriting until we got it where it needed to be.

And then how it ended up being, it ended up fucking working. But then I think of my first draft of it and I cringe going like, oh, wow, like that was totally not going to come off the way that I wanted it to.
So I would say that there's a way to kind of apply that to, um, to a, uh, I guess booking a show or whatever. I mean, I've always been like, I mean, I grew up during the era, the tail end of variety shows.
They were still all white. but what it did have was it wasn't just an all comedy all music it was like music dancing comedy you know it was sketches there was all of this different shit was in there juggling so maybe maybe there's that but um i don't know i i don't have enough information on this type of thing but I can't tell you that um you know one of the best things you can do is if you're somehow established in a business is to listen and to help out younger people that are in your business and um not to go the other way to try to hold people fucking down as you know i got here I'm going to fucking stay here by standing on everybody's heads like that.
It just doesn't work. And then what happens is because you're just going to get old and no one's going to give a fuck about what you say.
Right. And then, you know.
And then you were a dick to all of these younger people and they could have put you in something. You know, you could have played the uncle or the grandfather in their fucking project because you were cool they could have been like you know what you fucking when no one knew who i was you gave me some advice you helped me out you threw me a gig or whatever and now you're an old fuck i'm gonna fucking hook you up and get you a reoccurring on this shit i mean that's how you i don't know that's how you i i feel like you keep your career going is, you know, you, you just, just be nice to people and listen to them.
And if you're a fucking asshole, be like, all right, I'm sorry. I was a fucking asshole.
God knows I've done that, you know, and try to clear up my mistakes, but I am human. I do fuck up whatever.
But like, I think it's really's really important um without going on and on here that uh like whoever's booking that show to kind of learn something and maybe just like adjust it okay we're gonna try to try it again this way but like but i don't think that you but my problem is with a lot of people that aren't like uh performers but then they just start doing like bean counting things. Like we need a person of color.
We need a gay person. And they don't do the work.
It's like, no, you need talent across the board. Don't just go, Oh, you're, you gay.
All right. You're in it.
Yeah. You're not white.
All right. You're go out.
You do the fucking work and find the person that is the shit, happens to be gay or whatever, whatever it is you're trying to get in there. So you're not just doing a fucking, you know, in all whatever show you are.
I don't know. It's it's it's a it's a fucking, you know, there's no easy answer.
Sorry, I did my best there. I did my best, man.
Just fucking cut me some flat. All right.
Japanese bicycles. Hey there, Billy Bagger, bro.
Love that you've been riding and hearing about your experiences, especially with some of the best roads and scenery in the nation outside your front door. How could you not be having a good time? Because people text when they drive.
I've been riding my whole life and have a small side business repairing only vintage motorcycles in Seattle. Wow.
Just wanted to give you my two cents and hope to encourage you to buy a vintage bike. You're absolutely right to be in love with vintage Japanese motorcycles.
I own, love, and repair all makes and models as long as it's old, so I'm not i'll keep it short but if you do buy an old japanese motorcycle i'd like to give you three i got to give you my three top picks i will be googling all of these see here we go the podcast is fun again i'll shut up about the fires in kansas city and fucking uh taylor swift sorry i you know'm like anybody. I can fucking go on and on.
Don't fucking act like your wife or girlfriend goes, oh, my God, if you bring that up one more time, I'm fucking leaving you. All right.
And then I did that thing where I'm being a douche and now I'm saying you've been a douche, too. All right.
Let me own it. I've been an asshole.
Sorry. I'm going to I'm going to do better.
All right. A 69 to 78 Honda CB750.
This is the bike that changed the game for all bikes. Perfect for around town, but plenty of legs for a freeway cruise.
All right. So that was basically the first super bike that got it going.
I think that's the one because I remember I've've done a little bit of i've gone down a little bit of a rabbit hole 73 to 75 yamaha rd 350 how do you remember by the way the names of these bikes it's like fucking memorizing barcodes like who can't remember like a fucking you know a mercury monarch fucking rd 350. This is a two-stroke Ripper that was race-developed.
All of these motorcycle guys love the fucking two-stroke, which is basically the spark plug fires every, like, the piston goes down, comes back up, fires down. Every time the piston comes back up, it fires, as opposed to a four-stroke, which I guess burns cleaner for the environment.
So it fires, piston goes down, one, back up, two, down, three, back up, four, fires again. I believe that that's what it is.
And a true stroke is just bang, up, down, bang, bang, bang, bang, like hammering a fucking nail in. And obviously, I would think they, they have way more torque because of that.
Um, this is a two stroke ripper that was race developed. Yeah, that would obviously make, cause you're not losing horsepower during that rep when it comes up and it doesn't fire back down to turn the crankshaft.
Uh, this is-stroke ripper that was race-developed.

RD. That's why it's the RD350.
It is awesome for twisties in the back roads, but tame enough to get around traffic. Dude, hats off to the fucking...
the engineers over there in Japan. Like, they...
You gotta give it up to them. Like, you can't kill a Toyota.
70 to 79 Yamaha XS

XS650. The bike is legendary.
Torquey, the best exhaust note, freeway, and backyard fun, and gorgeous. Just a thought.
I'd hopefully give you some encouragement and maybe point you at some great choices but old

buy old shit and go fuck yourself that's awesome by the way anybody in japan listening to this um it's been a bucket list for a long time to go over there so here's my question i would like to after i get done with this play and i gotta uh hopefully you know we sold this script hopefully we shoot this movie um i would like to go go to Japan in 2026 I'd like to go there when the weather is nice and I would like to know where to go where all of those young kids that are into like the vintage motorcycles Japanese motorcycles where they're going to be riding or if there's a show that that i could book the trip around and if and i also know that you're that in japan the coffee is like an absolute like italy and japan is everybody that drinks coffee says like that's the best coffee in the world so i'm going to italy uh next in july I'm taking a little summer vacation there with the family. Am I going to do a gig there? Gee, I don't know.
Possibly. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
I would like to go to Japan and obviously have your amazing food, coffee. And then I would love to see, uh, some of those motorcycles.
If there's like, um, I don't know. Sometimes they have like those motorcycle clubs.
You can actually go in. Um, it's a combination bar, restaurant or whatever.
I don't know what you're doing over there, but like, I would love, I would love to go see that. That would be incredible.
Um, just throwing it out there. You guys have any information right in.
Um, all right. French music recommendations.
Uh, Dilly, dear Billy, uh, croissant tits. Um, if you've never heard of the French band called air, I have not.
You need to pleasure your ear holes ASAP, specifically their debut album, Moon Safari. They've been putting out great music since the 90s and have a solid cult following, but many Americans just haven't heard of them.
Dude, there's nothing more than what I love when you guys recommend this stuff I've never heard of. They got simple bass and drum grooves and an overall chill slash loungy sci-fi bossa nova vibe going on sign me up sadly they don't tour very often god bless them good for them very why would you you live in the french countryside fucking great food and conversation I wouldn't want to go on the road either they don't tour very often but are incredible live the band gives each other lots of space to breathe the music is perfect for a sunday drive or mushroom slash molly experience cheers from new hampshire and go p All right, I got to check them out.

And with that, I got to, I got to,

let's see what, let's see what old Freckles

has been listening to lately.

All right, so a friend of mine,

my drum teacher, Dave Elish,

told me to download this album, Miles Gertu.

It's Trilog Gertu, one of the most amazing

drummers in the world. And Robert Miles, what is this album called? Oh, it's called Miles Gertrude.
Robert Miles and Trilog Gertrude. Incredible, incredible music.
I downloaded Usher's new album. It's amazing.
Somebody sent this to me, that song Ruin.

And I watched the video. He went all out.
I like that he's going all out like MTV still plays videos. I love musicians that still make fucking killer videos.
Then I've been listening to that. I don't know how to say the name.

Krang Bin, K-H-R-U-A-N-G-B-I-N.

I was listening to that. I don't know how to say the name.
Krang Bin, K-H-R-U-A-N-G-B-I-N.

I was listening to a bunch of soft rock.

Um, and then Phil Collins, the sweet spot between the Genesis Prog stuff and before Susudio, don't care anymore in the air tonight.

All of that type of shit.

Um, Jungle Brothers, straight out of the jungle. Who was it? Pablo Cruz.
Deep Purple downloaded this album, Burn, which is fucking insane. Tony Williamss native heart um oh and then this uh this guy latimore it ain't where you've been 1977 um herbie hancock a soundtrack blow up luther vandros i had no idea like this fucking guy how great a singer that guy was i always heard he was a great singer i couldn't get into it because i was listening to metal i've been listening to a bunch of shit like that um and been having like a a great time with it and listen to a lot of i don't know a lot of like soundtracks to movies like 80s synth and that type of shit you know so i i I like, I don't know, some of that stuff, like I just like took it for granted because I kind of came up during that time and like I haven't listened to it in a long time.
And then I go back and listen to it. I'm like, this stuff is fucking like it sounded really cheesy and thin to me, like when it was happening.
And now I go back, it's like, no, that decade really really had like its own sound and now that i haven't listened to it in decades and i'm coming back revisiting i was like this this shit's actually really fucking good so anyway that is uh the podcast i went a little bit long all right here we go i'm not talking about the fires anymore i'm not talking about kc anymore the taylor swift all of that shit. And, uh, that's it.
We'll just talk motorcycles, fucking music and, uh, whatever. I'll be in New York, um, this time next week.
And, uh, I don't know, I'll be getting ready to do, it'll be a different thing, but, um, I'm going to be in the clubs a lot, you know, when I can, making sure I keep my act tight,

because when I'm done with this run, I got to do Abu Dhabi, and then, I don't know, I'll be in Italy, so who knows? Maybe I'll do a show? I don't know. Could be awesome.
All right, that's it. All right, if I've been pissing you off about that shit, I'm sorry.
You know, whatever. I get lost in my shit too, all right?

Sorry, and go fuck yourself.

I'll see you on Thursday.