Tortle Tank: Passive Eggcome

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Welcome to Turtle Tank, everybody.

Splush Blast!

Splooge!

Splooge!

Spluch sounds loaded!

Splooge!

Splooge!

Throwing to Jay Krowitz and if he has an actual show.

Hello,

Hatchlings, and thanks for tuning in.

Welcome to Turtle Tank, an exciting show or shell for those who who think outside the box, Turtle.

I'm Lake Turtwitz, along with your celebrity hosts, Shel Mali, Waxboard,

Flying Surfy, and of course we've got Called Shell Turtle Stanner.

Let's go.

Thank you for the intro.

Turtle Stanner, Jesus.

The intro.

I feel like I'm front row at like a pop music concert.

I'm just, I'm cheering for Sabrina up there.

I'm a big stan for classic pop music concert.

I snort two thick lines of cocaine before we do this

or turtle sploosh.

Our first pitch comes from Adriana.

Adriana writes, Hello, turtles.

I hope your day is going swimmingly.

Oh, okay.

Oh my goodness.

That's very clever.

Have you ever been playing a martial character with low decks and therefore terrible AC just waiting for the day your DM gives you plate armor so you and the rogue are no longer just as easy to hit.

Well, let me introduce you to plot armor.

Plot armor is a feat you can take that allows you to get a plus two AC boost whenever a party member of yours drops to zero HP.

It's a great feat for martial characters who are here to make the last stand and take the big hits.

I currently use it as my oath of crown paladin in my current campaign, and we flavor the reasoning to be as the battle gets tougher, I'm emboldened by the need to protect my friends.

It's also a great way to make the back half of difficult long combat feel a little more engaging, add a little more hope to what is usually quite a sad moment.

In terms of balancing, we don't usually let it count more than once per party member, and it has not affected our propensity to heal party members.

No one is letting themselves or others drop for my AC boost.

You immediately answered my question.

That's right.

It's a tight pitch.

They're plugging all of the holes.

I've got beefs, but continue.

Okay.

Oh, no matter how small the hole, Murph will find it.

Please don't say that.

He'll wriggle in there and he'll poke at it vigorously.

All I'm asking in return is one of your eggs poached and a WWE fact from Murph.

Thank you for your time.

Okay, you have gone for my heart, unfortunately.

Okay, really quickly before we go on, what is a poached egg?

You crack it into a boiling pot of water and you stir it so it kind of like cooks the egg.

And you better put a little white vinegar in there to keep it together.

Yeah, I was going to say, how does it not?

It's when you illegally hunt an egg

for its shell.

Right.

Like in the rescuer's dome.

Exactly.

I did have a joke.

What are you going to say?

That this animal was going after this like really weird like hybrid birds, squirrels, children.

And I really just thought like, oh my God, like it must be so sad when you're an animal and one of your kids is plucked from your nest.

Certainly.

It was a nightmare.

I think they don't like that.

No, they get upset for sure.

But in the dream, the animal was doing it for nice reasons, but I was like, that thing, okay, this is a completely unimportant.

It's completely unimportant.

Completely unimportant and unusable.

Let's move on.

So now that I know how to poach an egg, I can engage.

We'll get to chapter two of this dream after this pitch.

All right.

Well, first.

Okay.

So.

We love that you're asking for WWE facts.

You seem like a wonderful person.

Oh, no.

That being said,

I feel like I already, the plot armor part of it already kind of takes me out of it.

Just the name itself.

Just the name itself.

Plot armor.

Already, my hackles are up.

I could see that, right?

Because it does take you out.

It's like kind of meta-commentary.

And so, like, instead of being like last stand or something, that like has you like.

Also, what's cool?

It's a branding issue.

Yeah, it's a little bit of a branding issue.

But beyond the branding issue, I would say this is a little bit, they want to give you that boromir moment, right?

Where you get hit with a bunch of arrows, but you keep fighting having high ac doesn't do that having high hp does no having high having high ac can increase your longevity i've done no it increases your longevity but you're not getting hit so i'm saying it doesn't feel like a last stand this doesn't yeah this is i'm saying we've got a branding problem but then also i think the core mechanic here isn't achieving the thing that it's supposed to achieve i see you're saying it just like puts them into like superhuman mode where they're like fending off every single attack rather than sustaining every single attack.

Yeah.

I see you're being.

There's the zealot barbarian, and this is a pretty high-level thing.

At 14th level, you shrug off fatal blows.

While you're raging, having zero HP doesn't knock you unconscious.

You'll still make death-saving throws, and you suffer the normal effects of taking damage while zero hit points.

However, if you would die from blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

So basically, you just can stay up and keep taking hits and lose death-saving throws.

I think there's a mechanic that you could build off of that or do a temp HP thing.

Or I guess you could just like reduce the AC by two and boost every other stat.

Like you do extra damage, but your AC goes down.

So you're more vulnerable, but you are able to like do more damage and just like affect the battle more.

I don't know.

There's a lot of ways to kind of twist this.

I think this is overcomplicating it a little bit.

I'm like, maybe, you know, something like we had in campaign one where you could use like hit dice during battle.

I think this is

like a deep thing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What if you start taking half damage when somebody goes down?

That's just raging, right?

I mean, I kind of like the idea that bonus action, you can use a hit die or something like that.

However, I just think this is fun, though, because it's also, it sounds like it's applying to the whole table.

But like only one PC can have it.

And I, that also, because part of me was like, if this was a feature of a character, maybe it would feel really fun, but maybe by the fourth time it happened, you wouldn't feel that drama.

Yeah, I'm just imagining.

So I do think HP makes it feel more like a movie moment.

Like I'm imagining a situation where we're all at the table and two people go down and then you're about to get hit and it's just like, oh, actually, I have 21 AC now because my friends are down.

I don't get hit at all.

I have a question though.

Does it say Boromir in the pitch, Jake?

It does not.

It does.

So it doesn't say Boromir.

So their idea of a last stand might not be you're taking arrows but still fighting.

It might be, I saw my friend go down i'm locking in i am unleashing a new level of myself it's true their aura might be flaring yeah i think maybe maybe it's less of a last stand and more of a just i'm going to keep fighting but i do think that that would apply to hp and not ac this might be more of a goku situation where he sees krillin go down and that's when you go super saiyan sure this is what we're working on exactly i was gonna say jake was gonna say

it was on the tip of his tongue it was on the absolute tip of his tongue jake loves gecko absolutely goku situation.

Yeah, I was going to say it was similar to Gecko.

He's re-watching the Fretzo saga right now.

Yeah.

I was going to say I'm re-watching the Fretzo saga now.

And you love Fretza or hate Fretsa?

I was going to say I have mixed feelings.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Frieza becomes a little bit more of a complicated figure.

Jake has watched ahead.

Frieza, excuse me.

I think I think this is fun, especially because the table's enjoying it.

And like it does, it does

give a silver lining to because sometimes like if someone goes down, it can feel really hopeless and it does give like a little boost of hope.

I'm also really curious to try to poach an egg now.

So

I am going to try.

I am going to offer a poached egg, but I don't know if I'm, it's going to keep together in the water.

The fun thing you have to do is you have to create like a little whirlpool for the egg first, and then you drop it in.

This sounds really fancy, and I'm actually out now.

It is kind of intimidating.

The last tweak I want to offer, even though it's totally unnecessary, I'm just thinking out loud because it's fun and we have to fill time anyway.

So why not?

What if you tied it to death saves or death fails even?

So it's just like your AC boosts the more.

Why AC?

Why is everyone on this AC?

Just no.

I don't care if you're not going to be able to do that.

I don't think it works out.

This person has come forward.

All they asked for was one poach deck, which scared off Emily and one wrestling fat.

The issue is that the AC is the problem.

It doesn't make this person trying to solve it, but it's what they want to solve.

I feel like their reasoning for the AC boost is not perfect.

It's not a perfect fit.

But what they want is more AC at earlier levels.

Yeah, they just want to get stronger when their friends go down.

Yeah.

And so I'm into it.

Yeah.

So where does this leave us?

What's that WWE factor?

Let's see.

Okay.

So I gotta, I guess I gotta, I was trying to furiously think of something because I was like, I'm not gonna look it up.

So it has to be just like something I kind of remember.

Draw dog it.

At WrestleMania 5, the

then women's champion, Rockin' Robin, I believe, sang America the Beautiful to open the show.

Okay.

That's great.

Because they were undermining women's wrestling so much that they're just like, we gotta have the women's champion on there, but we don't want to let her wrestle.

So we're just gonna have her sing.

Oh, she didn't get to wrestle at all.

She absolutely did not get to wrestle at all.

She just sang America the beautiful and was not really like a singer.

Was just like, just went out and tried her best.

That's also normally using the national anthem when you open something, not America of the Beautiful.

So, another strange Vince McMahon fact: he likes America of the Beautiful a lot more than

the national anthem.

Yeah, having a favorite patriotic song is just insane behavior.

Yeah, it really is.

Yeah, I couldn't even begin to have an opinion.

Noted deranged person, Vince McMahon.

Yes, exactly.

Just another factor, just another check in that column, I guess.

Okay.

All right.

So I offered and rescinded.

I think there's something here.

Whether it's switching it from AC to HP or something like that, using hit die, I kind of like the angle I was working with the death fail.

So I'm going to definitely poach this egg.

Unless your players are enjoying it, I want you, for the sake of the story, to change the name Plot Armor because I've always heard it used derisively, and it just makes me worry that it will have a twinge of lowering the stakes when it happens.

I think it is it is to be cheat.

Oh shit.

But we know but if you're if your table's enjoying it though

turtles I'm the no turtles it's more like if your table's enjoying that that's fine.

It's just like if it if for anyone they like cross their arms and they're like well I guess no one's actually dying in this game.

Can the Terra pun come in with a swoop

about fate armor as opposed to plate armor?

Call it that.

Oh.

Oh, I like that.

There you go.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That honestly makes me like it more because I feel like these two puzzle pieces are not fitting together for me.

Yeah.

And does anyone else think you should just put points into decks as like a fighter?

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Because a lot of times they're asking, but I know that's what I'm saying.

I've been this person.

I'm saying they're trying to solve a problem.

It's not a problem.

Murph, I've been this person.

Sometimes they're.

So am I.

That means your constitution's bumped up and you just have more HP.

That's just sometimes as a fighter, you got to prioritize strength and you roll like dog shit for the rest of your stats.

So you're just like, okay.

Yeah.

Sometimes D and D is just making problems that you have to solve.

That's the fun part.

No, but Fate Armor just made me crack my egg over this pot.

Tell you what.

But there's

no.

Are you going to poach?

I'm poaching.

Are you going to poach?

I'm poaching this idea.

I think, yeah, maybe make it a feat so that you're like having to sacrifice something else to get it.

And then maybe I'm fully on board.

Maybe I'll poach two eggs.

Heck, why not?

If the table's feeling it, I'm on board with fate armor and you're all just passing it around.

That being said, I'm too intimidated to poach an egg.

So I'm out.

All right.

And it sounds like Caldwell outbid me with two poached eggs.

So this is all Caldwell's.

Sorry, Cald Shells.

Yeah.

And I did look too closely at the water, and I have a first-degree burn on my face from the steam.

So our next pitch comes from Old Nog.

Old Nog writes.

Wow,

a really vivid picture of who you are came up in my mind, and it's definitely a cartoon from a Dickinson novel.

I don't know if they have cartoons in those, but

we do now.

Torts, I'll keep this short and sweet.

I know what I have, and I know what it's worth.

Beginner's luck.

Any player who has never played DD gets 1d6 luck points rolled with advantage for their first session.

What?

This serves the purpose of teaching advantage and disadvantage, and giving a brand new player more chances at badass.

Oh, wait, no,

no, no, no, no, it's not just double.

I'm an idiot.

It's likely going to be a lot.

Forgive me.

Any player who has played but is new to the table gets 1d4 luck points.

No advantage.

This allows a person new to the group to have a good time and takes the pressure off those early poor roles.

I'm seeking 10% off of all future eggs hatched after the implementation of this rule, but I am open to haggling and tweaks.

You never say you're open to haggling, by the way.

So I'm going to tear you apart.

Okay.

Are you feeling lucky?

I have a confection, which is that I actually missed that whole pitch because I spent the whole time self-flagellating about the fact that I said Dickinson instead of Dickens.

Okay.

Okay.

So I feel like, once again, this might be kind of solving a problem that doesn't need to be solved, which I think some of the most fun bonding moments you can have is having bad moments, is having bad rolls.

The tension.

Yeah, the tension.

Also, it takes away the tension because if you're rolling with advantage, you're probably going to have five or six luck points.

So it is this weird thing of like, I don't know, it's like being the new kid at school and the teacher just being like, this kid's special.

This kid's really special and he's awesome.

Now go talk to everybody.

This kid can pee their pants three times.

Yes.

We won't.

And it doesn't fucking count.

It doesn't count if he shits himself in gym class.

He doesn't need to change his pants.

You have to pretend it's not real.

Yeah.

Isn't there also like baked into the game now?

Everyone every day gets a heroic inspiration.

If you're a human character.

If you're a human.

Okay.

Okay.

You could just give them a point of heroic inspiration for their first game.

Yeah.

But it's worth noting that, like, if you're new to DD, learning how to play with six luck points is not learning how to play the game.

It's like, yeah, you're not learning how to play the game.

I also would argue, what do you guys think endeared you when you initially played DD?

Because I think failing was

failing and facing consequences made me laugh so hard that I think that's probably what endeared me.

Totally.

Yeah.

Getting my shit kicked in because I did something stupid or failed a role is that that's the best part of the game.

Yeah, and also the DM has the ability to just like kind of, you know, offer advantage on a new player's first roller table.

True, true.

You can, yeah, you just be more liberal with your advantage.

Also, if they're the only new person at the table, there's probably going to be other people being like, I give them the help action.

Are you having fun?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Please don't let this fall apart.

I'm imagining some of the disasters that happened in the first few sessions that I played DD.

And I'm thinking back and just being like, what if I had just re-rolled those six times?

And just everyone was just like, you rock, dude.

You like the bad guys in town that were trying to push you around.

Yeah.

You fucking intimidated people.

Yeah.

If you had advantage on six rolls in your very first session and then the next session, you dropped off to normal.

Yeah, not even just

re-roll is so much better than advantage because you can see if you need it or not.

Like, you get to roll the one dice first.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

You know, I think you're kind because you're looking out for the first timers and you want to, but I think you get it with just, you have a point of heroic inspiration.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think you're

helicopter DMing a little bit.

Like, you don't want them to go off into the world and get hurt, but they kind of need that to really learn the game.

And the bonk.

Yeah.

They got to bonk every once in a while.

Let the kids roll.

They got to bonk their head on the coffee table every once in a while.

Yeah.

We'll build character.

Not speaking from experience or anything.

I do think that the DM should have a special dice that they hand to them to say, this is your DM inspiration dice.

Use this.

Oh, and it's all 20s.

That's a way to do it, right?

Yeah, certainly.

Yeah.

Each side says, you're doing great.

They're also asking for 10% of all future eggs, which is a pretty wofty sum.

Again, we don't want to get lost in the tank.

I feel like this has been broken.

No, but you're kind of right.

Because

you never know.

That's enough.

We kind of just wait for that.

Some clutches are more...

Some clutches are more fruitful than others.

So 10%, you never know what you're giving off.

We're kind of getting lost.

And I mean, I've had a long career as a turtle.

I have a lot of eggs in different places.

And as they grow, I'm not going to give 10%.

Also, think about it.

If one of those eggs might then go on to have their own eggs, in which case, I'm missing out on those.

It's right.

I feel like big futures for sure.

It's honestly the bookkeeping gets over with.

I think we're losing sight.

I would rather do a show.

You want to turn this into

passive egg come, but we're not

egg come.

We're all known for our robust clutches.

Okay.

Okay.

Passive egg come is my favorite thing that's ever been on the show.

I respect that you're trying to help out the new players.

Yeah, your heart's in the race.

Much too rich for my eggs.

May I ask a question?

Jake, was watch this your very first role?

I don't know.

No, first role.

Because that was in the swamp.

But if you had realistically try and go back to a time where you had different expectations about what DND was about, if you had a re-roll, six luck points, or let's say even three, would you have been like, okay, I'm actually going to

actually try it.

Yeah.

I'm going to try and re-roll that.

If I just like re-rolled that, I think, I don't know.

I guess I probably would have felt like some kind of pressure to do it because it was such a failure.

And I would have lost that really funny moment.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, that was like a formative role for my DD playing.

I think that might have been your first net one.

Ooh, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And yeah, you don't want to take the sting out of that.

You really don't.

You want to feel and you would have felt pressure too because you would be like, I don't really know the game.

They gave me all these luck points.

I guess I better use them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You know what?

I should hop over this puddle.

Yeah.

You do it so well that all the kobolds flee.

Yeah.

I re-roll and get a 12, so I kind of make it.

Yeah.

Great.

Okay.

So I think no one's going for it.

All right.

The price was too steep and we've, you know, we felt like.

The price doesn't really matter as much.

But yeah, it's just kind of too many look points, I think.

But I will say, if they were just asking for a poached egg, I might have tossed in.

Well, all right, the next time that's not the point of the show.

God,

let's list all the different types of show is about me saving eggs and building passive egg comp.

I have a question, though.

Do you guys actually, the way that you guys describe poached egg, it sounds horrendous.

Is it actually good?

It's good.

Yeah, it's delicious.

It sounds watery.

It's good.

I mean, it's especially good when someone else makes it easy.

It's like a hard-boiled egg, but it's soft inside.

Yeah.

I love a soft-boiled egg.

Yeah.

I made a lot during the pandemic because it's just a great way to like stare at a swirling pool of water and forget about everything else.

Sure.

Look at something other than your phone at that point.

Exactly.

It's a good way to pass the time.

If you're looking at your phone too much, might I recommend eggs?

Incredible.

Okay, our next pitch comes from D-Bot.

Good day, Tortals.

I come with a unique opportunity for the discerning investor.

Okay, now that you've kind of said, like, if you are discerning, you will like this.

I think I'm ready to make an offer.

This reminds me of

so easily won over.

This is amazing.

This reminds me of all the job offer scams I get on my phone.

And I'm like,

those are really increasing, huh?

Life is bad.

But this offer is going to be good.

I can feel it.

I present the Mercurial Elixir.

This healing potion is not for the faint of heart, but with great risk comes great reward.

Spider-Man.

Once the potion is taken, the player rolls a D6.

On a 6, the potion acts as a superior healing potion, 8d4 plus 8.

A 5, 64 plus 6.

Continuing down to 2d4 plus 4.

On a 1, the player loses one hit point or fails a death-saving throw.

I know you're asking yourselves, why would someone pick this potion over a sure bet?

It might be the thrill of gambling.

It might be the chance to let the dice tell their story.

Most likely, it's that they retail for five gold pieces less than a traditional potion of healing.

Turtles, I'm offering 49% of my company in exchange for five eggs.

That's a good deal, everybody.

Wow.

And a comprehensive legal liability plan

plan.

Everyone's stopping.

I'm feeling very discerning.

Souffle could be fun.

Go on.

Souffle an egg.

Continue, James.

Comprehensive

legal liability plan for the inevitable player lawsuits.

And there will be lawsuits.

The trick here is that there's four of us.

So somebody's going to have to, somebody's going to have to

have to chip in the extra egg.

And I don't know who that's going to be.

I guess we'll have to see who really wants to.

Oh, no.

Our clutches, though.

Do we all have clutches?

Yeah, we have clutches.

So we all have multiple eggs.

Sure.

You have Scrooge McDuck amount of eggs.

I have a question.

So

what was the height of that?

If you roll a six, how many HP are you rolling?

It's a superior healing potion, 84 plus 8.

I don't know.

This honestly sounds too good to me because losing just one hp is not that big of a game

yeah yeah i think i like this but i think it needs to be more severe yeah i think so too here's my thing with it right is that it kind of doesn't make any sense from a

oh murph is in a mood to get it

well not chording

well it's hard to make this homebrew stuff that's why it's you know

that's why there's game designers I'm teasing you.

Yeah.

I think

the problem I have with it is that I do think that something like this should probably just be a one-off magic item or it should be at like a cursed item shop or something like that.

Just the idea that you can go out and just buy like, here is this potion that is of what quality I have no idea kind of takes me out of it.

Just from like a role-playing perspective and like a world building aspect.

Or just like, well, we've got our superior potion.

Or like, I don't know, just take it the logic into anything else.

It's just like, here's Pepsi, here's Pepsi, that might be poison.

That's just available at the store.

I will say, Murphy, you had a really good joke at a potion shop we went to at some point where the poison was like a certain shade of green.

Oh, they were all

green as well.

Yeah.

And I think that, like, that's, it can work in that environment where you've got kind of a kooky potion.

Just a weird, yeah.

I think it needs to be the weird guy in town has his weird, like, curiosos and has, like, strange things in his shop.

Yeah.

I would put this one out in the moon and I spit in it.

Yeah, exactly.

So I think it would need to have like some kind of unstable potion master to make this unstable potion.

I wouldn't just be like, these potions are available everywhere because that kind of doesn't add up.

Yeah.

Especially because the way it's written, I would just get it every time.

Yes, totally.

I would be like, superior to the person.

Yeah, so it is like losing a hit point isn't that bad.

That being said, losing a hit point when you think think you're going to gain hit points is bad and could kill you.

There is something fun about it, but you need to like know the risks up top.

And Murph is right.

It should be kind of like a one-off thing or like just a limited supply.

I am drawn to just the name Mercurial Elixir.

Yeah.

And that to me, I'm like,

that's a scamp potion seller.

I think that's not a...

Mercury's muddles.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, I think it's a special idea, so you might as well treat it like one.

Don't make them ubiquitous in your campaign.

Yeah.

Anybody can sell them.

Right.

Know your worth a little bit is what I'm saying here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We're going to, I don't think any of us are buying it, but we are telling you to know your worth.

Know your worth.

Should we brainstorm this potion seller a little bit too?

I want to like see like what they're like.

Because I think that's really going to be our value add here.

It's like we're going to provide you with the kooky potion seller in your town.

Yeah.

What was the name in the oh, Mercutio?

You could name it Mercutio like in Romeo and Juliet.

Sure, yeah.

that's good because he's a scamp he's absolutely a scamp is he the prince of cats i'm thinking of someone else there's a prince of julie should know that

that's his nickname is the prince of cats that's actually so sick i was the nurse i consider myself the prince of cats but

i think you should write it mercurio yeah mercurio that's what it was

i called it mercutio is oh and one famously so i do think maybe i could take him guys before the shakespeare head roast me it's tibbalt was the prince of Cats.

Oh, Tybalt.

Wait, William, but he's the bad guy.

He's the best Mercutio, right?

That's what I'm saying.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Shit, I can't take Tybalt.

He's 1-0.

No, Romeo kills him.

Does Romeo kill him?

He's 1-1.

I was literally in this play, and I don't know if Romeo kills Tybalt or not.

Again, I was the nurse.

The screens were very Juliet.

Does Romeo kill Tybalt?

The line in the movie is Romeo slew.

Romeo shall not live.

Yeah.

Oh, you're right.

Okay.

I only saw the movie.

I saw it in theaters with my friend Niall.

Shout out, dude.

Absolutely.

Shout out.

Shout out to Niall, fellow Leo fan.

Fellow Blair Danes dude.

You're a Danes dude.

And a Leo lover.

Okay.

So is anyone in, I do think that what you should do is you should just have a little kooky old man that's like, I've got something for you in the back.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

He's got like a long beard and it's like stained with potion potion oil.

Yeah.

Only has really expensive potion, but has weird fucked up ones in the back.

Yeah, but he's also just got like a Baja Blast machine.

Sure.

I like this enough that I'd toss in five eggs for it.

49% of the company.

That's passive egg come.

Yeah.

A little lost in the tank.

I'm actually going to scoop Jake and I'm going to put in five eggs myself.

I'm actually going to put in six eggs to kind of just like make it a bidding war.

This is the second time you outbid me, dude.

And then I'm just going to poach an egg on my

bag.

that.

Yeah, I'm gonna try it because I did just buy a basil plant, so I'm thinking about like learning how to cook.

I feel like because this episode I've kind of turned down a lot of offers, I'm kind of turning it into this.

Um, who is it on Greater British Bake Off?

Is his name Paul Hollywood?

Yeah, okay.

So, Paul Hollywood does like the handshake.

One of these times, I'm gonna shake their hand.

The no-tortles turtle is gonna shake one person's hand, no matter how bad the last pitch is.

If I haven't picked up anything, I'll be able to get a picture of it.

Can I make a prediction?

It's going to be Caldwell.

You're going to end up shaking Caldwell's hand for a pun that you begrudgingly love.

If I don't like any of the ideas, I'll compliment one of Caldwell's pawns.

And please remember to have hand sanitizer because turtles are filthy.

Yeah.

There's something there.

There's something there.

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Goodbye, sweeties.

Hey there, Nadpoles.

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Thanks, everybody.

Okay, our next pitch comes from Cameron C.

Cameron writes: Oi, here it is.

Okay.

Confident.

This is like a town crier.

I'm engaged.

I start prepping my hand in salt water.

I walk out from where I was cobbling shoes.

What?

Because that's when town criers were crying.

When criers are crying, cobblers were cobbling.

Definitely true.

That's right.

We have to move on.

The ring of my blacksmith hammer dies down as I hear somebody say oi from outside my door.

I burst out of the pie I was baked into.

I paused my Super Nintendo.

I lift my head from the stocks.

Here it is.

Social dice.

When traveling or resting, players can reach into a pile of D6 to claim one to apply to their next role.

All they need to do is interact socially with the other players, usually asking questions about them in most cases.

This has changed our usual game drastically, and we now have an abundance of side quests lined up based on characters' backstories that likely never would have been uncovered otherwise.

Best of all, they are organically made from the players themselves, all in their efforts to min-max for their next encounter.

Have I solved the power gamer-social gamer divide in one move?

Am I a genius warrior poet?

To find out, all I ask for is a chameleon egg for my son, who is currently obsessed.

Okay,

actually, now is the time to admit that I haven't been a turtle all along.

I've been a chameleon.

Emily,

oh my god.

Made myself look like a turtle.

The disguise is so good.

I am so sorry for lying.

This is on us.

Chameleons don't look that much like turtles at all.

This is absolutely on us.

Yep.

Sorry.

Surprise.

You put a JPEG of a turtle on your skin.

She just made herself a turtle green, and we're like, she's one of us.

I wore a turtle Halloween costume as a chameleon.

Yeah.

And you all fell for it.

I have a question.

What does the D6 do in this equation?

I think it's like inspiration.

You just

add it to

a bardic inspiration, but it's for chatting with people.

But you can use that later in non-social societies.

Exactly.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

To a later role.

I love this.

I think that's so good because I do think that there is always this ambiguity between like, what do we do in downtime?

How focused are we supposed to be on the mission?

I feel like sometimes even at tables, there's like a

lack of clarity about, am I allowed to talk to the other players or can I only talk to the DM?

And this is like saying like, not only are you allowed to, you're encouraged to and rewarded by it.

I love this.

It feels like just a real campfire scene.

Or I've been reading Stormlight Archive, and there's just a lot of descriptions of people making soup in that book.

And it's just delicious and it's very enriching.

And I feel like there's something nice about this communal downtime activity.

We're all like pulling dice out of the middle, but like as you do, it's almost like there's like a busy work activity where everyone's like chopping vegetables or something.

You're like getting your backstory out.

It's so good.

Yeah, this is great.

It's interesting.

Oh, no.

Oh.

Oh, shit.

His hand is quivering.

quivering.

It's interesting.

I think, I mean, it sounds like it's really working for this person's game, right?

So.

Right, but I mean, right now, if someone's pitching something, we can say it works at your game, but we're not going to franchise it.

That's kind of what I'm wondering, right?

Is I'm like, I think there is an element to this that is, you know, it is encouraging it to the point where it almost becomes mandatory, where like you sit down at the fire at the end, you're like, well, I need that fucking D-stick, right?

You're right.

I can't see it coming coming.

I have to go talk to the rogue about their edgy backstory you know

you might hit like the bottom of the well of someone's backstory and then you're just like oh so what's your favorite food actually that's a fun conversation too though it is you know what it is very helpful i think for a table that this hatchling has said like to kind of solve power gamers.

So you've got power gamers here and this is a good way to encourage them.

I think just in my experience though, it might take away some of the organic moments that happen of like, it makes the lows less low, but I think it also might make the highs less high.

Because then you're not going to have that moment of like, everyone goes to sleep and these two characters stay up and have this like moment of connection or something.

Because everyone's, you know, it's Expedition 33 and you're walking up and talking to everyone at the fire being like, did I get my info?

Did I get my info?

Yeah, and I love that part.

I write in my journal every single time.

Gotta, for those who fight further.

Yeah.

For those who come after.

Yeah, for those who come after.

For those who fight further.

That's ours for Final Fantasy.

VII.

Neither of them are ours, Merv.

No, that one's ours, dear.

That one's ours now.

I love the idea of trying to mechanize this interaction.

Because it is, to me, that is like a big part of the game, is like these social downtime moments.

I wonder, just to offer my unnecessary tweak, because I'm the complex turtle.

I've got a weird looking shell.

Maybe it's like when you do this, you both.

Whenever you engage with someone else, you give them the dice.

So it's like you're giving them a D6 of inspiration.

The power gamers are not going to go for it.

Yeah.

It's great that it's working for your table.

I'd be curious to hear in the future if it ever does become cumbersome.

Because if it does, like, I wonder almost about like when we start out an adventure with new characters, it's like this is in play for a short time and then it's like an end point.

I don't know how you take it away.

It's also like the way that DD works, you're usually only having downtime like every few sessions.

That's true.

That's fair.

And as you level up, does it get less you know does it stay the same do you reach a point where you're like well we don't have to have downtime conversations as much now that we're high level i do wonder if the power gamers in your campaign are thrusting more downtime into it

yeah well it's just a d6 yeah it's just a d6 it's just a d6

but you don't i don't know i guess caldwell brings up a good point that you don't have downtime that often but if like every single session was like oh all right no i have to ask a question now i have to ask a question now these these two characters need to have a side conversation.

It's like, I might just be like, can we just go to bed and do the battle tomorrow?

That's what I want to get to.

Yeah.

And now that also the fact that the submission has power gamers in there, I'm picturing people asking a really thoughtful question and then going shark-eyed with disinterest.

Yeah, exactly.

Like, is there a way to not spam this?

Jake, what if you make it like almost like a hero's feast alternative or something like that?

Where like it's a special meal.

Like it is like a last meal before a big battle sort of thing.

Or it's like you literally throw like a magic pine cone into the fire and it like awakens memories or something like that.

I like that.

So it is like, it's something that you like.

This is a common problem we encounter on the show: it's not something you can use all the time, but it is like a special thing before big events.

That's interesting.

Like, kind of a lower-level hero's feast because hero's feast is super expensive and is so good.

If you can homebrew something that's like a lesser hero's feast, that's kind of interesting.

Hero's casserole.

Yeah.

And then it gives people, and then you can.

Hero's potlug.

That way you can make it a little bit more organic.

Damn, I might have to shake Caldwell's surface.

I knew it.

I knew this is where I was going to go.

My fingers on ice.

No, we thought we were going to do it as a joke about a stupid pun, but I actually really like it.

I'm boiling up my hand right now.

A lower-level heroes feast.

I've got the Calamine lotion out.

You have to rub that in.

Why do you have to?

That's really interesting because then as the DM, you could be like, how do you prepare the meal?

Like, who are you talking to?

What are you doing?

And you can make it more organic and kind of paint the scene.

Yeah.

Again, not that there's anything wrong with what this DM is doing because it sounds like it really works for this table, but to me, it's a little too mechanical.

I think a lower-level Heroes Feast solves it.

Just take away a few of the bells and whistles from Heroes Feast, make it something that is easier to do.

I'm going to put my fin on ice and maybe Shake Haldo's hand

what we got.

So it's an honor.

It's just an absolute honor to be like just on the stage with you.

So thank you.

I know that my biscuits are sloppy, but well, you know.

All right.

So, does that mean

Proof is buying it?

Yeah, I think I'm

in for one chameleon.

You're driving.

I'm in for one chameleon egg.

Well, then you're going to have to begin.

Emily's the chameleon.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, Emily, can I have a chameleon egg?

We're getting lost in the tank here.

Make him beg for it.

What are you going to give me for this?

Make a deal.

A turtle egg.

I don't need a turtle egg.

No, not a one-for-one trade.

I hate to interject, but that is.

Yeah, we're not doing one-for-one.

Two.

Because my eggs can look like

your eggs.

And you can't eat.

Emily, I've got a full list of all the ways you can prepare eggs.

It's the Caldwell Tanner Egg-Exclusive Cookbook.

Okay, as someone who owns a basil plant now, I'm getting into cooking, so I will hit you up on that.

You're going to love this.

I'm going to have one of my French omelette.

It's going to be great.

I'm going to do a Japanese style.

Okonomayaki, are you kidding me?

Let's get into it.

Okay.

All right.

So

I'm going to give a nice fin shake to this player and Caldwell at the exact same time because I do think it needs Caldwell's amendment on it.

I think that makes it sound like a little bit of a test.

I'll butt the player out of the way and shake Murph's hand.

Goes in for a hug.

Misreads the handshake.

A couple eggs pop out as I do it.

I'm so excited.

God, they're all covered in calamine lotion.

Okay, so this one belongs to Murph and Caldwell with,

I guess, an Emily egg.

Yeah.

All right.

Our next pitch comes from Baron.

Baron writes, what's up, naughty tordies?

I know, Leo.

Okay.

I love this energy.

I really do.

Everyone's intros have been very different, and I love it all.

I know we've got a busy day ahead, eating lettuce and breathing out of our buttholes.

Yeah, true, true.

They do that.

Too true.

So I'll get right to it, and I won't waste your time.

How many times have you desperately wanted to blackmail a gelatinous cube, start a small business with a Wyvern, teach a griffin to appreciate art, or ask a gibbering mouther if they dream.

You know, I have a pretty active imagination, and I don't think I've encountered any of these impulses yet.

Wow.

If only there was someone who could solve this problem for us.

Yes.

Only to realize that you can't communicate with them.

Don't you love it when you cast speak with animals on a random critter and force your DM to come up with a silly little voice?

There are spells that allow you to speak with plants and animals, but what about oozes, monstrosities, and aberrations?

Well, I have the magic item for you.

No longer will your monstrous musings go unanswered with the belt of monsters call.

It's basically a belt that gives you a plus-three bonus to interacting socially with monstrosities, apparitions, plants, elementals, and oozes incapable of speech.

Also, once a day, you can use the belt to understand one of these types of creatures the same way you can speak to animals.

The product is 90% there, but we just need to work out some kicks.

It is the belt that kills you.

Many of our beta testers have unfortunately formed romantic attachments with cocks.

How can she not

try curiosity about what an ooze lover would be?

That's a feature, not a bug.

Yeah.

I'm looking for a single egg soft-boiled in an egg cup with some toast cut into little soul crops.

Oh, like mommy used to make.

I'm interested

in the presentation.

Would you accept a poached?

Poached in an egg cup?

Get out of here, you Philistine.

I like this already because I remember as Calliope, I took Speak with Plants, and I believe it was third level and every time I used it I was like that was a fucking waste of a third level spell.

Speak with animals is first level, right?

Yeah.

So you can like get information.

Speak with plants, at least for myself, never found well I feel like animals are just kind of harder to track down.

So first level, it's like fine.

You got to catch the animal before you can like ask it anything moving around.

A plant, you could just be like, what happened here, dude?

You know what I mean?

What's up, grass?

Yeah.

Hey, what's up, grass?

Did anyone get murdered here?

Did you see who did the murder?

Yeah.

No, that's it.

That's a very...

I saw everything.

Yeah.

And I guess trees live for like hundreds of years.

So you could get like the full history of the land by talking to a tree.

Yeah.

So I know, it's weird that this is an item, though, and not a spell.

Because I feel like making this like a second level spell or something that you can like burn in battle to try and like make it a social encounter seems fun to me.

I don't hate it as an item.

It almost gives you like charisma.

It's almost like a babble fish, right?

Yeah.

That you can have on you.

Yeah.

I wonder if you need the elements to it that is.

Well, I guess, okay, so only once per day you can use it to talk to a monster, and other than that, you just have like uh plus on charisma checks when talking to monsters, which is correct.

They would maybe narrow it down a little bit because right now it's like you have it with like elementals and all this stuff.

I feel like we should really lean into the like monster theming here.

Well, I guess like some monsters specifically like don't comprehend common, right?

So, like, you could just like limit it to monsters that like do not have like the ability to like speak common or any spoken language i think that's like in all the stats so you could like base it on that yeah so you could get like almost like an uncommon common you like know a language that those who don't speak common will understand yeah the primal language of beasts yeah could we call it dr goolittle yeah actually yeah i think that's actually awesome maybe like a dr gool do not shake his hand you already shook mine you promised you would not shake his hand i vigorously shake jake's hand and Root, much like Paul Hollywood, over-delivered on the handshakes.

The no-turtles turtle has instantly started shaking everyone's hand.

It's becoming his thing.

It's just becoming too much of a thing.

You won't let go.

Yeah.

That's really interesting.

I'm like looking up monsters and being like, how many of them can speak common?

And a weirdly large amount of them can.

Really?

I'm looking at just this giant fucking like frog snake and it's just like, yep, speak common.

Speaks it?

Because some can comprehend it, fucking speaks it,

speaks it, brother.

So then you wouldn't even need a spell to be able to talk to it.

Correct.

Okay, but there are other.

I'm looking at, whoa, this looks cool as hell.

There's a monster called the Deep Crow, and the language it speaks is Deep Crow.

Oh, yeah.

Whoa.

Okay, let's just make a Deep Crow belt.

It's like a super goth-spike bell, and you can speak Deep Crow.

Oh, this thing is so sick looking.

God, can we play a Deep Crow campaign?

Yeah.

Since Murph has gone soft-boiled on us, I I feel like I'm going to have to put on my no-chortling shell right now.

Wow.

And say that I think that this might undermine some of the more martial classes' desires in battle.

Because I feel like unless you are overwhelmed and you need like an alternative solution, I think a lot of people like slicing up a jelly.

I think the intention wouldn't be to stop battle because a lot of times if you try to make like persuasion or charisma on monsters that you're actively fighting usually the rules kind of give you disadvantage and try to discourage that.

I'm guessing that this is out of battle for out of battle mode.

Interesting.

Yeah, you just like encounter one in a dungeon.

Yeah, I am wondering how much it helps to like talk to a gelatinous cube, right?

Well, like, do you say like get out of the way and the gelatinous cube just agrees?

That's true.

You could like before initiative be like, sir.

Sir, please don't.

I guess it'd be the equivalent of like with a guard or something.

Yeah.

It's just like you can try to trick it or you can try to, yeah.

Because there are

senses.

Because there are monsters that it feels like the reason you fight them is that there is a language barrier, right?

Sure.

Like sometimes it's kind of like this animal is just scared and it's sneaking out and is going to attack us because we can't explain.

We're not here to hurt it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, I guess like the only issue with this is that the DM will need to come up with motivations for every monster in their dungeon now.

They'll need to figure out like what the

DM.

Once a day, that's a good thing.

Once a day, it's not too bad.

Would the DMs think that this would be annoying?

I think you could really easily, especially as like a jelly, I would just be like, consume.

And they'd be like, can we go get you like an animal?

I would be like, horse's hoof.

That will be fine.

You want to make him like a nice fancy jelly?

Good day, sir.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

Jab.

I wish I had pants to squeeze into.

Ooz, you call me Ooze.

Why, I'm a fine jab.

I'm a compote, really.

Berries.

Give me berries to sweeten my palate.

Yeah, okay.

There's a lot you can do with this.

There's so much you can do with this.

Yeah, no,

I think it's interesting.

I would say this, yeah, this could work.

I feel like it's pretty harmless.

Yeah, I like it.

I do think that it does kind of like change.

I'm suddenly like, I got to put monstrosities in their way.

I got to put oozes in their way.

I got to justify this.

Because otherwise, the player might feel a little disappointed if it's like, hey,

when are we going to fight the next ooze?

When are we going to meet another ooze?

All these monsters are too smart.

I'm wondering, yeah, does this make the campaign too ooze focused?

Because then you're just kind of trying to make persuasion checks on oozes all the time.

Again, not a bug, a feature.

Sure.

Yeah.

Also, if your character is Dr.

Goolittle, then yes, it's already pretty ooze-focused.

Well, I thought the belt was Dr.

Goolittle's belt.

I didn't realize that you had to be Dr.

Goolittle.

Well, you have to imagine that Dr.

Goolittle, like, did all of this research and lived in an age of history and stories.

And like this belt is the last relic of his time on earth yeah but then we're going to find out that actually he's still alive he's encapsulated in a um life-preserving goo wow sort of cryogenic goo and so guarded by deep crows yeah darted by deep crows it writes itself right i'm in campaign sounds awesome i'm in but the uh eggs do need to be poached

well

i'm just remembering that i think dr do little 2 is the first time i ever walked out of a movie that was when i i think i was like 14 years old and realizing movies could be bad sometimes.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, that is kind of hard when you have like the first time that like the movie, the thrill of seeing a movie in theaters doesn't work on you.

This just isn't for me.

This is just not for me.

The sassy parrots is not doing it.

Yeah.

It's just not as fucking funny as the first one.

Dr.

Doolittle 1.

Okay, is anyone in on this?

I think I'm in on it.

I like that.

I think it's a Doolittle belt.

I think it's additive.

I for sure like it.

It definitely, you got to be, you got to be careful as the DM with this one, though, because players are going to be like searching for oozes all the time.

They're going to be busting open beehives and like getting the sap out of trees.

And like get comfortable cutting away from romantic scenes so that you don't have to get into, if the rest of your table doesn't want to listen to it, you don't have to get into the biology of what it is.

Crawling into all your crevices

and reconstituting.

Exactly.

Yeah.

Which sounds

okay.

You guys want to do one last submission?

Let's do one more.

All right.

This one is from Trouble at the Tavern.

And they write, sup Torti McGordies.

Wow.

It's a little informal, honestly, this time around.

Really?

It's too much.

Wow.

Treat us with respect.

May I introduce morale cards, a mechanic that improves the odds of success on future tasks with the success of past ones.

Upon rolling a Nat 20 on an ability check, the player receives a card from a standard deck of playing cards.

Jacks through kings excluded.

Sure.

The card is placed face down in front of them and they can use it on a future ability check.

Players do not know the card number until they choose to use it.

Using a morale card is simple.

After you make an ability check that you are dissatisfied with, you flip your morale card and add its number to the total of the roll.

Revealing a Joker is an automatic success.

Only one morale card can be held at a time.

If a player rolls a NAT1 on an ability check, they lose their morale card.

Morale cards cannot be used on attack rolls, saving throws, or damage.

In exchange for this super rat rat awesome idea, all I ask for is one egg, deviled, a mediocre thumbs up,

and a piece of moist bread.

Thank you.

The introduction of the playing cards feels DVD-focused.

So, I had to say

Caldwell

so carefully, sir.

I feel Caldwell buzzing at it.

I had the same reaction initially, but the idea that it could be a one through a 10 and it's sitting there and you don't know what it is, I did find it very fun however i would want it to be limited to one location like what when we went to hell um in campaign one and we're in like the casino gambling yeah like it could maybe work in in that so i wouldn't it wouldn't be a morale check then but i like the idea of people getting a playing card that they don't know what it adds yeah it's a wide room feeling that isn't that what that's what dice are yeah right yeah and this is just like a different way to roll the dice is it only it's supposed to be skill checks.

I would probably take away those limitations just because it feels like it does get a little sweaty.

Well, I think the idea is, is that you're getting better at a skill.

Like if you succeed at something, you're getting better at it.

It doesn't really equate like being awesome.

Doing something awesome the one time isn't necessarily going to like, you know, make you four or five times as good the second time.

I like this because I love the card.

I love not knowing.

I actually think it should be allowed to be used in on attack rolls or saving damage because that would make it more fun.

But I agree with Murph that, like, the narrative justification for it being there needs to be a little bit better.

Can I give like a different perspective though, which is that I do feel in my personal life that a morale boost is a general stat boost?

Like, sometimes when everyone's flying high, it feels like everything's a little smoother, everything's a little easier.

Like, enthusiasm, I think, is kind of a general stat boost, except for maybe wisdom.

But I don't know.

I think that there is just like a

buzz that you can get into.

I feel that.

I will say that the one tweak I would suggest on this is when you're using cards, I think that cards need to be a little more cutthroat.

Like the dice, it is this beautiful, even shape.

It is symmetrical, but cards, they are items of chance.

They are gambling.

So I think that the ace or dice.

Yes.

Yeah, but it's really eloquent, but it actually

You're waited for one.

It actually makes no sense.

Yes, none of this makes any sense.

There's no reason to piece.

It makes no sense.

It's beautiful.

It's geometric.

But anything, I don't know.

For me, I guess it's true.

If you go to a casino, there are dice games, there are card games.

But to me, for whatever reason, cards represent chance a little more.

Yeah.

Maybe it's just the fact that you're flipping it over.

You don't know what's under it, but you can see all the numbers on the dice.

So there's at least this false equivalence about how honest and truthful the result will be.

But so you've got the ace in there, and you've got the joker in there.

I think that the

joker should be an automatic fail.

I think that there should be a risk that you can still fail on this because

you can ride too high, you can lose your confidence because you were gambling and feeling the rush and you got careless.

So, I think that, like, I agree, having the Joker in there allows for the ability to fail, and like, you know, adds a little bit of that risk.

The theming is so strange, though.

Imagine just being like, I'm a blacksmith, and I'm forging weapons, and I did an an awesome job.

I got an AT 20.

Yeah.

Uh-oh, my next time, I got the Joker.

Like, what does that have to do with anything?

That's why I think it should be kind of isolated to a specific location that you're only at for a couple sessions.

That's fine.

And maybe tied to a deity that you're reaching out to.

You could do it that way.

Much like the potion thing.

If there is just a card dealer that's like, I am going to give you these magic.

Yeah, you have like a deity called the dealer or something like that.

Some sort of ephemeral trickster god called the Joker or something.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

That's that's a good idea.

Like, wash Phoenix.

Theoretically, like this, yeah.

Okay, yeah, I like the idea

if it's tied to an NPC and done like one time.

Otherwise, I'd say you can achieve this with like some kind of advantage mechanic or something.

Like, if you get a net 20 the next time, you do the exact same thing, you get advantage.

That's fine, you get some momentum.

Here in this town, we worship the Phoenix, Joaquin Phoenix, that is.

Atreil is the Joker, with every role reborn.

yeah okay so i think this is interesting for like an npc uh space i think it's fun i think it's fun but i would limit it to a location and i would not i i am gonna say that i think morale boost is gonna give a blanket thing i wouldn't limit it to skill checks

yeah i agree with that so i'm gonna go ahead and i and i do love deviled eggs so let's do it dude yeah rather than taking like the whole idea we're across the whole game we're kind of making it just an item or like we're taking our original idea of the joker and putting him into the game so really we don't owe this hatching any that's true we came up with we had the novel idea to have walking phoenix be a deity

our world i'm rereading your pitch it doesn't mention walking it doesn't mention joaquine phoenix literally at all what if the entire pantheon is different walking phoenix characters oh i mean we're different jokers

different jokers you're right and now we're getting so far from it that any judge will throw this out and claim

walking because it's always like, I don't know who else.

Oh, Jack Nicholson?

Was he?

Sure.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

Mark Hamills, the animated Joker.

Yeah.

Here's what I can think.

Pantheons are always like, you know, this noble god and like this god of the trees and the hunt.

No, make them all tricksters.

Yeah, this usually lives all the way down.

Yeah.

This one's going to have like five or six.

Oops, all tricksters.

Take him to Goofy World.

Okay, I was on board until you said take him to Goofy World.

It doesn't have to be called Goofy World.

That's in the notes.

That's the rough draft.

Who is some cool name?

well goofy is of course in it dressed as the joke as the joker or as goo it's goofy oh goofy you get the you get dr goolittle's belt so that you can romance goofy gelatinous goof

okay well you don't own any of this because we do

yeah

You can have one of my eggs and devil it yourself.

I have a deviled egg flight prepared for this player.

All right, well, we just happen to have some parallel thinking there, and we have this character character called the Joker that gives out cards.

Oh, you know what?

Since it's turtle-themed, we can call it the Joker because of the yolks in it.

Oh, that's really interesting.

I mean, is it parallel thinking if our fucking thinking is so high?

Yeah,

yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

It's not even parallel.

We're in a different strategy.

We're in a different strategy.

When lines are parallel, one has to be above the other.

And this, this Joker, the shell is painted

instead of its face.

Oh, he's got a big smile on his face.

He's got a big smile on that shell.

But then also on his face.

The turtle.

He laughs.

But then also on his face.

Yeah.

Certainly.

And Batman doesn't know which way he's.

And it says, why so serious?

And it's S-E-A.

Oh, there it is.

Yeah.

Submit that.

Please, everyone, you know, on Tumblr, DeviantArt, wherever you make art,

why so serious.

Why so serious?

Yeah.

Why so serious?

Yeah.

Oh, that's fun.

Aquaman and Batman can do it.

Really good Saskai down.

Beautiful.

Okay, yeah.

Well, we'll be selling that merch.

That's kind of where this this idea has landed.

It's incredible that we, yeah, yeah, it's really incredible.

I'm gonna, James Gunn is actually texting us right now.

Yeah, so we gotta get on the horn with him.

We gotta get on the horn.

All right, thank you all so much for listening.

Uh, over on our Patreon, we're actually gonna do some DD courts.

So we're gonna sing it up a little bit.

So head on over there to patreon.com/slash nadpod.

That's NADD P-OD.

Don't sing yet.

Will you text James Gunn back Supermana T?

Yeah,

just say that.

No other details.

Yeah, he texted me back just a picture of his face, and it looks like he's coming.

Wow.

Whoa.

That's awesome.

And with that, does anyone have anything they'd like to plug?

Splooshing.

We've got a Dimension 20 Live show in Vegas.

November.

Search Dimension 20 Live.

We're going to be doing Starstraw.

Starstra.

Starstruck.

Check out my Substack, substack.com slash at J Kurwitz.

I just published something this week, actually.

Sweets.

If it's okay with everyone, if it's all right, if I could be so bold, I would love to plug our shop where we sell ours.

Yeah.

We've got some new stuff in there.

We have a Spudfucker's mug.

It's really good.

It's a diner mug.

It's really cute.

Please buy this mug.

It would be so funny if we had to order more.

That's my goal.

Yes.

A second run.

You know, we talked about gambling and playing with cards.

This is our gamble, is that not everyone will buy this mug?

I know it's early, but I'm thinking one for every single member of my family for Christmas.

Yeah, you gotta love that.

That great stalking stuffer.

And with that, we're gonna wrap this one up.

You can follow us on social media that remain ready to use at chmerseme.

I call these called well, at extra demily, and at jakeurs is jake.

And you can talk about the show online using hashtag nadpod.

That's n-d-p-od.

Splish spasper.

Splish spash

splash.

Splish bash.

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Blah.

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Oh.

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There's so many of us now.

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That's going to do it for us this time.

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Thanks so much.

Be well and have a great life.

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That was a head gum podcast.