Trinyvale X Strahd - Ep. 6: The Blade of Truth

This is a head gum podcast.

Welcome to Trinivale.

Trinival.

And also Barovia.

Barovia.

Yeah, that's music to my ears.

That's the only music I listen to.

When I drive my car with my windows down, people are concerned.

But you know what?

I'm concerned about the fate of Barovia, folks.

I'm concerned about the fate of Nyack.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I'm not as concerned about the fate of Borovia.

Yeah.

Best thing Nyack's ever heard.

No, I am Brian Murphy.

Jens doesn't care.

Yeah, okay.

Personally, here at the table, we are concerned about Nyack, so let's get right to it.

This is episode six of Trinavale Extraad.

I am your Dracula uncle, aka Drunkle Caldwell Tanner, and I'm joined as always by my pernicious players, Brian Murphy.

I thought Reagan was a vampire.

Now things are dire.

Jensen Dell.

It's down to the wire.

And we've got Emily Axford.

Losing air shit over air fallen trip.

Let.

I was like, I think there's something I'm misunderstanding here.

That pause was pregnant with twins.

Yeah.

And speaking of twins and triplets, we have Jake Hurwitz.

Triplet bud, who's losing his blood.

Nyack is around.

Your blood, buddy.

It's everywhere.

Yeah.

Okay, folks, I know we are eager to have a second funeral here for NIAC.

But before that...

Bury me in a spud fucker.

That's extra.

How about a quick recap?

All right.

When last we met, you three had just witnessed the arrival of Count Strahd von Tsarevich at the funeral of the Burgamaster.

With his horsebone heliclopper idling in the background, Strahd announced that he had come to pay his respects to the late Burgamaster, and also to take Marina, or as he called her, Tatiana, away from the chaos of Borovia and into the safety of Castle Ravenloft.

To further prove his point, Strahd had his servant Reagan Misty step into the church to free Doru, the vampire spawn, imprisoned in its undercroft.

Once free, Doru smashed your spudfucker's sample bar, then ran to attack Onyx.

Villain!

However, before he could reach her, Onyx used Mask of Many Faces to disguise herself as Marina, then had Bluetooth fly her to safety.

She then struck Strahd, only to discover that he had somehow stolen your power and was using it to instantly heal himself.

Afterwards, Jins attempted to hold off Strahd using a tiny invisible bow or something.

There wasn't a bow, there was never a bow.

It's unclear.

But you mind one.

I don't know what to tell you.

I'm a good performer.

Just really invisible, probably.

Anyway, he got a face full of fireball as a reward.

Despite his failed effort, Strahd seemed intrigued and offered Jins a vice president of development position within his empire.

Next, Reagan Misty stepped to the roof and used a study action to locate the real Marina while bragging about how many articles about magazines he's read.

You know what?

Nerd is geek chic, baby.

It's back.

Finally, Marina entered the church and found safety from the vampires who can't enter a residence without being invited in.

As the battle raged on, Onix attempted to steal Strahd's helicopter only to be rebuffed and then got attacked by Doru.

Jinns got pushed into the burger master's grave and hid in his coffin.

Yep.

I did good turns.

Nyak fought with Reagan to reclaim his bow, and Strahd attempted to charm Marina.

As Ismark made a brave stand against the vampire lord, you three all sought refuge in the church as well.

To try and throw Strahd off the scent, Onix used a silent image spell to make it seem like Marina had exited the church and was coming to meet him.

Eager to rejoin the fray, Reagan misty-stepped into the church and felled Nyak Nyak with two poisoned arrows.

Nyack now lies bleeding on the floor, his friends all watching with concern.

And that is where we are now.

So as Nyak falls,

you hear a deep, echoing laugh from outside the church.

Very good, Reagan.

Very good.

Make them tremble.

The church's timbers seem to rattle as you hear straw laughing.

Dust from the rafters falls onto the still body of Nyak, illuminated by flickering candles.

Overhead, Reagan cackles in victory.

But all is not lost because it is Nyak's turn and we've got to roll some death saves.

Wow!

Right, there's hope.

Jenza's eyes water, and you can't tell if it's for Nyak or if it's for the Spudfucker soft launch failing.

No, you can tell.

Quite obvious.

So as a reminder, you've already got one automatic fail.

So let's see if you can save on this one.

Nyak, what did you get?

Nyak coughs up a single chive.

That's an 11.

All right.

Hell yeah, one save.

Awesome.

So you...

You catch the scent of potato on the wind and you start to reinvigorate.

I cradled Nyak's head.

One of the founding members is one of the only ones that got to try one of the potatoes.

A true failure.

Let's see.

Next in the order is Ismark.

He is still outside the church with Doru and Strahd.

Through the door, you hear him shout, Friends, the vampires are coming.

Please, you must flee.

I will hold them off as best I can.

I gave you Ole Water.

Oh, yes.

Yes, I will use it.

Should we...

Ismark, should you come in here and we'll just try to kill Reagan?

I'm really fucking pissed at him.

Let's all surround him.

Are the villagers in here?

Let's Let's just fucking kill this guy.

You guys had pitchforks before, remember?

Yeah, he's got a bow.

If you square up with him, he can't even attack you except without disadvantage.

Ismark's square feet.

Damn, that's a really good point.

You hear Ismark's voice is wavering but earnest, and he says, Here I come.

I have lived a lesser life, but I shall die a normal death for Barovia.

You don't have to die necessarily, Ismark.

So he's going to burst through the door, leaving the two vampires outside.

He draws his long sword and his short sword and he is going to launch at Reagan.

Hell yes.

Okay.

Careful of my blood.

Don't slip.

Nyack's

having trouble living.

Nyak's having an issue.

Is he good?

Who could be good on a day like today?

I look at the spilled over potatoes.

I look at Nyak.

You can't tell which one I'm upset about.

Did he die of heartbreak?

Yes, I say.

He's very obviously still breathing.

Still has so many wounds, so many arrows within him.

It must have been heartbreak.

Okay, he's gonna take three swipes at Reagan.

That is an 18, a 19, and a 21.

All hits.

Yeah,

is Mark the normal indeed?

As he swings, you do see under his doublet some kind of beefy arms.

This guy has been like working hard.

Wow.

Push-ups instead of taking care of your dead father.

Hopefully in a different room.

Jens does emotion like ease up on his mark.

His forearms are jacked for some reason.

Remember,

we all gooned in the oats, everyone.

So he hits Reagan for 28 damage.

Whoa.

Whoa.

Okay.

Yeah.

Clearly he's been doing some push-ups in the goon cave as well.

It's not just pushing out, it's pushing up as well.

Yeah, you see, he just like, like a cyclone of vengeance, whirls into Reagan, slashes him good.

You see Reagan like jumps back.

Fuck you.

No, fuck you.

You're in here.

We've got lots of friends here.

There's my friend Bill Brill Drath, was it?

Yeah, I'm here.

This sucks.

Yes, it's awful.

Okay.

That is going to bring us to Keychain.

Keychain.

Got any more healing potions?

You know what to do.

He canters over to Nyak.

His antenna ears droop low in shock, and he says, No, my boy father, how could you?

You were supposed to be our wellness advisor.

Woof wolf, woof wolf.

He growls at Reagan, and then he's going to use his once-a-day bonus brew ability to heal Nyak for 2d8 plus 3.

Good dog.

Wow, healed is breaking hard.

Would you you look at that?

Nyack, as you lay dying on the ground, what do you think you see in this land between as death comes for you?

I think as Nyack lays dying,

it almost feels like the shadows, the Gloomstalker that he's taken the mantle of,

are encroaching and swallowing him.

And he thinks about how he's been been a shadow his whole life.

A shadow for gens,

the lesser man,

always waiting in the wings for his chance.

And now his whole entire life has passed him by.

But then

he gets this healing from Keychain, and the shadows start falling away, and he feels like

now this is my time to take the lead.

to take charge.

I should run this bud fuckers.

He stands up, brushes the blood off, and says, clean up on aisle me.

Jens laughs so hard.

Nayak instantly goes back to feeling small.

Yeah, you're right.

That was stupid.

That was so dumb.

No, I.

No, it was a good job.

Yeah, it was the joke.

What are you remembering?

It was not a joke.

It was the chandler-esque.

Yeah, it was a joke.

You said clean up on aisle me.

What was that?

Yeah.

Was that not a thing?

Was it supposed to be serious?

He meant it so earnestly.

He meant it earnestly?

Looks at honest.

He's just like, what the fuck?

I don't know.

He didn't want us to laugh at that.

I know.

I said I was giving him what he wanted.

I think maybe he's a zombie.

Maybe he did die of a broken.

Maybe he's never tried to be joking all along.

yeah okay we should shouldn't laugh at him

never laugh at anything i say let's take him really seriously going forward

that was a very good statement

so naya you uh come back to life uh you pull these arrows from your chest but notice that the wounds uh don't fully close up like they normally would after being healed huh your body still feels lithe and responsive but just a little closer to death.

Interesting.

And that's because you now have the injured condition.

Oh, wow.

Which is a new thing I'm going to be trying for this campaign.

It's a modified death save system inspired by Pathfinder.

When you go to zero HP and come back, you get the injured condition.

Now, the next time you drop to zero and roll death saves, the DC goes up by 1d4.

If you drop again,

if you drop again, you become gravely injured, you get a scar of your choice, and the death save DC increases by another D4.

Drop to zero a third time, you're at death's door.

This time, instead of rolling saves, you simply flip a coin to determine if you live or die.

Or a DVD.

He's obsessed with flipping coins.

It can be a DVD if one's handy, if you got one around.

The injured condition lifts after a long rest or with a greater restoration spell.

If this ends up being broken or not fun, I reserve the DM's holy and eternal right to just stop using it.

All right.

Great.

Do you want me to roll that healing?

Yes, you can roll the healing.

Okay, an eight and a two.

Yeah, so 13.

Great.

All right, so you're back up with 13 HP.

And that brings us to the helicopter's turn.

Oh, my God.

You hear the helicopter continuing to idle, waiting for its master to return.

It takes a huge dump next to a gravestone.

That's just disrespectful.

That's crazy.

I was in there and it didn't happen.

You hear it like whinnies, but like a helicopter would.

And then it readies in action.

And then we go to Strahd's Strahd's first legendary action.

We have put earbuds in Marina's ears.

Yes.

Marina's head down, earbuds in, not paying attention to Straddha.

She's changed to a manosphere podcast.

No, she's not.

It's called intermittent fashion.

No!

That doesn't do anything.

Ice water with a pinch of salt.

Curtises, she's just vibing in there.

Strahd actually still doesn't know if the marina outside is real or not.

Onyx, how does interacting with a silent image work?

Okay, physical interaction with the image reveals it to be an illusion, but that's physical interaction.

And I did it so that I think he would have to move to interact with it.

Great.

So if he does physically interact with it, he'll see that he can pass through it.

He can also take a study action if he doesn't reach it

to physically interact with it.

He can also take a study action to examine the image and determine if it's an illusion illusion with an investigation check.

So, I'm going to say that this Marina is like holding her arms up to Strahd.

Yeah.

And we'll say with this first legendary action, he closes the gap and gets to her.

And then on his next legendary action, he will be able to interact with her to see if she's real or not.

Great.

So, Strahd walks forward.

Yes, Totiano, you have come to your senses.

Jen stifles a laugh.

I'm normal.

I'm more normal than even Ismark.

Let's see, and that is going to bring us to...

Oh!

Donovich's turn.

Oh.

From behind the altar, you see Donovich slowly stands.

Where have you been?

My fucking brother, I can't believe this guy.

This is honestly so like him, am I right?

We don't know him that well.

I do.

It is.

He is either hiding under a mannequin or attacking me.

He's always fiddling with that mannequin, I tell you what.

Not anymore.

I smile at Jones in my ass.

He's our mannequin.

I don't know.

I don't know

what these guys are saying are jokes anymore.

He said clean up on IOME and said it was serious.

I'm sorry, Donovan.

Go on.

Can you help us kill Reagan?

It seems I really hate this guy.

Listen.

He sighs and runs a hand through his thin, sweat-soaked hair.

I'm so sorry for hiding before.

I could not face the truth of my brother, but I must own what has happened and stand up for the people of this town.

I cannot do much, but if anyone needs healing, I can channel the Morning Lord's light.

How is everyone?

We all need healing.

I guess give it to.

I mean, I'm okay.

I've got more than half my HP.

I'm at 14.

What are you at?

13.

I'm good.

Okay.

He's just going to flip a coin to decide who he likes more.

You see, the Donovich looks between you two.

I'll say one to three is Nyak, four to six is Jens.

Okay, Jens steps forward and kind of gives him like a nod to be like, me, of course,

but says aloud, just choose whoever you think is more worthy.

Nia stands up for himself.

Normally, he'd say Jens, but he stands up for himself for the first time and says, Either one of us is fine, whichever you choose.

Jens shudders.

I don't need it, but I want it.

She likes to nods solemnly at that, but then turns to Nayak and says, Clean up on Aile Mi.

Never have truer words been spoken.

What does that mean?

I thought it was meaningful.

What does it mean, though?

It means to be cleaned of your sins, don't you understand?

Okay.

To rise again.

You can't clean up.

No, that's great.

That's great.

I just feel like it's a good job.

It's meant to be funny.

Onyx, I don't know.

I don't know what's up with him.

I'm so cute.

He just said the most selfish thing I've ever heard him say.

Which is either one of us is fine.

We are falling apart.

We are falling apart.

We are falling apart.

Onyx starts crying.

So he heals you for nine points of healing.

Wow.

Yeah, you see like the candles kind of flare brightly for a second as he channels the Morning Lord's glory in this holy place.

But that glory is quickly undone as Strahd takes his second legendary action.

He's going to move again, reaching out towards Marina.

But as he does,

his arms go through her.

That is so fucked up.

That is so fucked up.

Uh-oh, looked like she ghosted you.

That was not a joke.

No one laughs.

That wasn't a joke.

It's just a joke.

We're on fire right now.

Why don't you want the credit for it?

Nayak.

I'm not going to interact with you.

I think I'm going to join Strahd.

Okay, let's.

We are falling apart.

We really are falling apart.

Why are you saying funny stomachs are getting mad at us?

They don't get me.

He's in a teenage phase.

I think he's like 30, but he's in a teenage phase.

I think he's trying to relate to Gen Z.

I am not ghosted.

I am the one who makes ghosts.

This will not do.

You have impressed me, Onyx Lubier.

Your control of the mist is to be commended.

I shall shall yet let you live, but if you cease to entertain, I will discard you and let my witches fight over your corpse.

So now,

after this very serious speech from Strahd, it's the rats' turn.

More dancing?

There's so many non-vampires that I just didn't consider.

The rats are going to go after Onix and Jens.

Let me guess which one of us they'll hit.

There's just a bunch of them dancing up to Onyx and a bunch of them with like razor teeth charging at me.

Yeah, one is Muppets and one is just like Floodborne.

What?

Rizzo from...

I like the cut of a gym.

Yeah.

See, he's kind of funny.

Jins, an 11 is going to miss you, and

an 8 is going to miss Onix.

They're all dancing.

They're so cute.

They're not.

Yeah, they're fine.

I think I have plague rats.

I think it's bad that they're in here.

I don't think they're good.

Yeah, you see, the rats like circle you and they just kind of front.

They like flare their chests.

Oh, yeah.

Hey, easy, guys.

Stop.

They point at you.

No.

And then, let's see.

That is going to bring us to

Marina.

On Marina's turn, you see

she feels bolstered by this potion of swiftness and prepares to flee.

I can help.

And you see, she reaches for the

thin ornate sword at her waist and pulls it out.

You see, there's this beautiful silvered rapier.

She says, This belonged to my mother.

Which one?

Alana.

Oh.

My adopted mother, the burgomaster's wife.

Okay.

She called it the Blade of Truth, and I think it will guide our way here.

It's a blade of truth.

I have a book called The Blade of Truth.

A book called The Blade of Truth?

Yeah, that's so crazy too.

If I'm bringing it to you, should I take a study action now?

I don't know.

I can't even tell.

Is it funny that there's a book and a sword that have the same name?

I don't know what's funny anymore because Nyax being a fucking weirdo.

And it used to be my salad.

I think it's hilarious that there's a book.

Okay, that's funny?

I don't know.

That's good.

The rats laugh.

What?

Okay, if the rats think it's funny, I don't think it's funny.

And Marina is also going to attack Reagan.

Please, let's kill this guy.

Everyone's fucking ganging up on me.

This is unfair.

You're in the goddamn church.

We've got pitchforks, okay?

You know what?

Give me my fucking coat back.

I want my coat back.

I want all my stuff back.

I'll send you your coat for my stuff.

Oh, yeah, right.

I love your stuff.

Yeah, I love your coat.

I can buy a new coat.

It's from Bonobos.

Yeah, I can buy a new magical sword and all of my levels back.

Yeah, right.

You fucking can't.

Yeah, I know I can't.

Bad bluff, bro.

Let's see.

Yeah, so Marina is going to take the silvered blade and attack Reagan.

Oh, fuck.

Shout out to the two Krikes.

I'm so sorry I distracted you.

It's okay.

I was just thinking about the book and the sword and how they're both called Blade of Truth.

That's got to be something, right?

I should have taken the study action.

I should have taken the study action in school more.

Yeah, it's kind of funny, I guess.

I don't know.

I just don't know.

Clean up on IOME.

What?

Okay,

so that is Marina's turn.

She enters the fray, feeling confident, but she has not practiced as much with her sword as Ismark.

Yes, Marina, feel your primal manly instincts.

And then, at initiative zero,

you hear the sound of several shrieking ravens.

We need some raids.

They're coming for the rats.

Followed by a loud shout from the church hallway.

Here comes the wine!

Oh!

Suddenly, you see three women in ornately trimmed dresses burst into the chapel riding a wagon full of wine barrels being pulled by Fitbit.

Goodbye, Fitzbit.

Oh, hey, oh, hey Fitbit!

Goodbye, kiss mommy on the mouth.

I don't know what anyone is doing.

And a nuzzle for Uncle Nayack.

Oh, no, oh no!

Very well.

Thank God you're here.

The soft launch has been a disaster.

Oh my god, what is going on in here?

Okay, we need to kill this one guy.

We can't kill anyone else, but we can kill him, maybe.

He looks pretty strong, but alright.

Yeah, but there's so many of us.

It's true.

You see, following behind them is a conspiracy of ravens.

They kind of land on the women's shoulders and say, the ravens told us that something was happening and we came as soon as we could.

You see, Alinka, oldest of the wine moms, steps forward.

Her feathery black hair flutters excitedly as she talks.

Mahina, babe, you can't give this man what he wants.

He's as rotten as they come, and you can't make good wine with rotten grapes, I'll tell you that for free.

She turns back to her sisters.

Mirabel, Sorvia, I know we're supposed to keep a low profile, but I think our potential business partners need our help.

Should we lend a hand, or shall I say, feather?

Yes, that's a feather.

I got some feathery hair.

They nod.

Then suddenly, all three women's bodies begin to shift.

Their faces elongate and grow shiny and black.

And feathers sprout all over their bodies as the wine moms become wine wear ravens.

Come on, girls.

Let's save spot fuckers.

So the wine ravens are going to enter the initiative.

Hell yeah.

Fuck yeah.

And that brings us back to Onix's turn.

Okay, I have a plan.

Bluetooth, go invisible again

from your character sheet.

I don't think there's a limit to it.

And then fly overhead and be ready to pick me up.

I can't go invisible.

I've got too much Riz.

Okay, look at your character sheet.

Okay.

I told you, I told you all the time, but right now...

I don't want to take the student action.

I'm not asking you to.

I'm asking you to go invisible.

Okay, fine.

I'm asking you to go stealth mode.

Okay, that's cool.

You made it cool.

And then I'm going to cast mirror image on myself.

And I think with that, because I still look like Marina, my disguised self lasts for an hour.

Cool.

Oh, shit.

So then would my duplicate self or my mirror image look like Marina's?

I believe so.

Okay, so then I'm going to tackle Marina again.

You really don't need to get if you just tell me to get down.

I need to get you out of the way of the window.

Tackle Marina again, cast mirror image so that I look like four marinas.

And then I'm just gonna start running out the church to try to get Strahd.

And well, I'm gonna do a sexy run too

and say, Strad, come get me sweet, Tatiana.

I miss you.

I remember your kisses, especially the ones in the nape of my neck and my inner thigh.

Oh!

Jens, she's doing a baywatch run.

And then me and all my mirror image marinas are going to baywatch run.

Marina does not talk like that.

Some people stand in the darkness.

I simply cannot tell which is which.

You see, Stradd, for his legendary action, peeks through the window like a perv.

But we're bursting out of the church.

Okay, cool.

And we're running.

Okay, great.

That's your turn?

Yeah.

Awesome.

Great turn.

Let's see.

That brings us to Doru.

Doru is still trapped outside with Stradd.

Oh boy.

As soon as Stradd sees you leave through the window, Doru says, Should I go after them?

And Strad says,

No,

I

grow bored of this affair.

This party has gotten a bit too crowded for my liking.

Besides, Tatiana has always played hard to get.

But for me,

the hunt is half the fun.

Wait for me in the helicopter, Doru.

I shall be done soon.

Then we can discuss your punishment.

Doru looks stricken, then slinks over to the helicopter.

And you see that Doru readies in action to wait for Strahd to give him a command.

Now that is going to bring us to Jins.

Ugh.

All right.

I'm sick of this guy.

I'm just going to try to kill Reagan.

Great.

I'm just going to go up and take two swings at him.

Ooh, okay.

24 to hit.

I got an 18.

And then offhand, I got a nat 20.

Ooh.

Hell yeah.

Don't get too excited.

I'm weak now.

Yeah, that's why I ran.

I don't even have a way to do damage anymore.

Yeah.

Okay.

Ooh, actually, I did quite well.

20 damage.

Hell yeah.

And then I'm going to,

in the hopes of getting him to attack and his giant nephew to attack, I'm going to look at Bildraath.

Okay.

And I'm going to be like, aren't you tired of people like this pushing us around?

Yeah.

I've been in Borovia for a day and I'm sick of it already.

Yes, we're tired and extremely scared.

I'm going to give Bardic inspiration to Bildraath.

Oh shit.

I'm hoping that if Bildrath attacks, his giant nephew also attacks.

And

I just motion for everyone to swarm Reagan to murder him.

Okay.

Yeah, I like this.

Let's make it clean up on Isle Reagan, huh?

That's funny.

No, it wasn't.

That was just cool.

It was a play on what I said earlier, which was cool.

Alright, I'm rolling initiative for Bildrath and his nephew, whose name is Periwimple or Parple?

Parple.

Okay, yeah, you see Bildrath looks to Periwimple, his nephew, and says,

It is true.

Who else will exploit people who try to come and buy items from our shop if there are no people left?

Periwimple, we must fight.

We must fight for what we have to sell people rope for 200 gold.

Jens cries, so inspired.

I love you, Uncle.

Alright, that's your turn.

Now we come to Strahd in the initiative.

After seeing these four marinas fleeing out of the church, Strahd laughs.

Then walks over to the church's door.

You hear him muttering in a strange language that makes your eardrums tighten.

And then a second later, a huge gust of wind blows the door off its hinges and snuffs out every candle at the church's altar.

Hey!

Hey, you can't do that.

Come on.

This took me so long to light those.

Yeah, come on, give the guy a break.

Strahd holds up his hand in a gesture of farewell and says,

Reagan, I grow tired of these shenanigans.

I leave this to your capable hands.

He then looks over to Jinns and Nayak and says, by the way, My offer still stands.

You have the potential for greatness.

I sense it, and I I am never wrong.

He points a finger in your direction, but you can't tell which person he's pointing at.

Obviously Jens.

Okay, obviously me, yeah.

Okay, no, we got it.

Yeah, Jens is right here.

It's easier to point.

Yeah, I'll point at him.

He grins, flashing his sharp white fangs one last time, then casually walks over to the helicopter.

Which was readying its action to take him, and then they

blast up into the sky.

You see this circle of flame engulfs them, and

they're gone.

And Strahd has disengaged for now.

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Thanks, everybody.

But Reagan remains.

That's right, I can take you all on myself.

I've studied up for this moment.

Yeah, right.

He just replaced you with Doru Reagan.

I hate to say it.

Him and Doru seem really close.

I don't what?

Because Doru can spit bars?

Just because Doru's got like rap sensibilities?

Doru doesn't have Doru is in the clopper.

Yeah, you're in the house with us.

Doru objectively cannot spit bars.

I just, I want to be in the clopper too.

I've I'm never he's never let me ride.

It sucks.

I'm his wellness advisor.

I went to all that trouble to capture that wizard and steal his spells and then set up that whole fucking night lotus retreat and this is how he repays me?

Wait, is this why you had so few reviews at night Lotus?

I thought it was just because it was a new hotel.

Yeah, I had to write them all myself.

You know how many email addresses I had to make?

Yeah.

It took fucking forever.

This voices in them were quite similar.

We should have clocked them.

We just thought they were bots and we love it.

Yeah.

Yeah, I didn't realize it was you, dude.

Yeah.

It was cool when it was bots.

I mean, it was bots.

It was awesome.

Flashback to you scrolling.

This hotel fucking rocks.

I love this hotel.

This hotel is unreal.

How good?

They cared enough to pay for bots, so that must mean they care.

Okay, so that was Strahd's turn.

It is Reagan's turn now.

He is fuming.

He realizes he has failed Strahd, his master, and he must get into his good graces again.

And you feel this kind of

grave,

maligned energy sort of start to pulse off of him.

And as it does, you hear the screams.

Tons and tons of screams.

And everyone within 10 feet of Reagan is going to need to make a wisdom-saving throw as he casts Deathly Choir.

I've killed many.

You won't be the last either.

Come join my choir.

The marinas and Bluetooth are 30 feet away.

Yeah.

Nice.

I only got an eight.

Nyak got an 18.

18.

All right.

Nyak, you pass.

Where's the real marina, by the way?

She's still like hiding in the beauty.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, cool.

I'll say that you tackled her out of range of this.

This is just everyone that's like directly in combat.

I'm going to say that everyone that's engaged is Jins, Nyak, Keychain, and Ismark.

So I'll roll for Ismark and Keychain 2.

Cool.

Keychain fails.

Ismark.

Ooh, Ismark would fail, but he's got his Bless up for plus five, which makes him pass.

Great.

So everyone that failed is going to take 3d10 psychic damage from this Deathly Choir.

Sure, gonna die.

Jesus.

Okay, it was low.

It's 16 damage.

Dead.

Alright.

And then eight for everyone that passed.

Are Keychain and Ismark still up?

Keychain and Ismark are still up.

Okay.

But unfortunately, that is just Reagan's bonus action.

Oh, dear.

For his action, you see him barrel roll back, knock another arrow to Nyak's bow, and aim it at Ismark.

Plenty of room left in your father's grave.

Why don't you go join him?

That is true.

You can technically fit two corpses in there.

I don't know how I know that, but I know it.

Okay, so this is a plus 10.

This is a plus 10 to hit.

First one hits.

Yikes.

That's going to be 13 damage.

He's going to take a second attack.

Hits as well.

That's another 12 damage.

Ismark.

You see that Ismark is at death's door.

We were just starting to respect you.

His leather doublet has fully fallen off, and you can see his honestly pretty jacked body underneath.

Yeah, geez, how much HP do you have?

You don't have more than us, do you?

Jens looks self-conscious as the guy.

I should have eaten the oats.

And that is going to bring us to the Wine Ravens and Bill Draft and Parple.

Go, Parple, avenge me.

I want hot dog.

Okay, yeah.

Reagan has hot dogs.

So they are all going to launch at Reagan.

So first attack, I'll say that Alinka and Mirabel hit.

Second attack, only Alinka hits, so that's going to be three hits total.

You see, they are all a little drunk from the wine.

Sure, you gotta be.

I make eye contact with one when they're in their like mid-anamorph, and then I can't look at them afterwards because it was too weird.

What?

What's wrong?

Nothing, no, it's fine.

Avenge me.

That is 14 damage to Reggie.

Reagan is starting to look a little hurt.

You see that

his furious demeanor is getting even more aggressive.

He's like twitching a little bit and clenching this bow.

You see he also starts to reach for a sleek black looking sword at his waist as well.

You're gonna make me use all my tricks, aren't you?

That feels kind of hot.

I learned that from Dolru.

What's the fuck?

Yeah, what the fuck?

Why is...

Why are all of my friends going nuts?

What happened?

He said one really toxic line.

Jens coughs up blood and just looks up at like the religious jewelry and just goes, what are my friends?

What am I doing?

Bill Draft

just takes a sack of potatoes and is going to try and swing at Reagan.

Cool.

Not the potatoes!

No!

Wait, this is smashed potatoes!

Yes, you're going to go from spud to dud.

How about that?

It's pretty good.

It wasn't supposed to be funny.

I looked to Nia to see if I'm supposed to laugh.

Why is nothing funny?

That's not a joke.

You're supposed to think that's hot the way you thought Reagan's laughing was hot.

I don't think it's hot.

He swings, misses, knocks over a bunch of candles.

She's a bag of potatoes, catches on fire.

No!

Oh, good.

Crispy.

Fuck.

Parple, you go.

Okay.

Parple has gladiator stats.

Yeah.

So he's having

three melee attacks, which is nuts.

Ho, ho, ho.

Damn, we should have got Parple in from the beginning.

Can't believe Parpo wasted so many turns.

You see, Parple grabs like a rod that has like a banner of the Morning Lord hanging on it, spins it around expertly, like doing like spear dancing with it, and then stabs once into Reagan for

19 damage.

Whoa!

Parpo, were you in color guard?

We're gonna give you the purple heart.

Not a joke.

I kill many wolves.

Is that what you mean?

There are colors inside them, I see.

That's what they meant.

And with that fucking hit, Reagan is looking roughed up.

And that brings us

to Nyak.

Okay.

No more soft shit.

It's time to hard launch.

Nyak

kips up, flicks some blood off of his hand, and draws a bow.

I'm going to bonus action Zephyr strike for advantage here.

That's 23 to hit.

23 hits.

I have one more favored foe, and I'm going to use my dread ambusher ability to take a second attack.

Oh, baby, that's a 24.

Both hit.

Woo!

Okay.

41 damage.

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Nyak, you leap up onto one of these pews, balancing delicately, knocking arrows to your bow.

You see Reagan, with panic and cruelty in his eyes, says, No one respects you.

Even that little fucking blue freak doesn't respect you.

You'll always be there, Shadow.

You'll never be the Alpha.

Never, never!

And as he screams, you feel this wave of deathly chorus erupt against you, but you weather it and

launch two arrows into him and

stop.

Fuck.

I'm real.

You guys fucking suck.

I'm smart.

I'm smart for this.

What?

His last words were, I'm smart for this.

I hope that's my last word.

And Reagan falls.

Thank God.

Of all of the mean, cutting things that he said to me, the one that landed the most was when he called Bluetooth a freak.

You leave him out of this.

As Onix and Bluetooth are fleeing, the hair on the back of his neck shivers a little bit and he looks back and says, I feel like something cruel just happened.

I so, so quickly start looting Reagan's body.

As he's saying his last words, I'm going through his pockets.

Awesome.

Yeah, so you start to loot Reagan's body.

Everyone breathes a huge sigh of relief.

All of the villagers come out of their hiding places.

Donovich starts healing everyone up.

Jinns, he brings you back up.

Oh, thank God.

Yes, the morning, Lord, keep you.

You see Ismark and Marina share a hug.

I was so worried.

You did so well, Marina.

I'm proud.

No,

you...

You truly were normal just then.

Better than normal.

So regular.

Yeah, they just marked the above average, I would say.

Um,

after they hug, they turn to you and say,

We have done it.

I feared that Strahd was simply toying with us, but

we must take any victory we can.

Where will you go now?

Let me grab Onyx real quick.

Onyx!

I'm deeply in character, and I've become Marina Tatiana.

Jens rubs his head.

Wow.

Just takes a full like 30 seconds to rub his head and then goes.

Marina!

Marinas!

I'm coming!

We're coming!

Okay, please come back.

Is that what I sound like?

I don't think I do, but let me close my, you know, I'll put the earbuds back in.

Hello?

Maybe I do.

Okay, strange.

Bravo.

Oh, no, I don't do voices.

I just do physical disguise.

One time I was this guy named Porker.

Porker who?

You wouldn't get it.

Suppose not.

Have you heard of the realm of Mobius?

All right.

Stories tell

of one way past school.

Okay.

Jens looks at all of the blood on his armor.

He looks out at the potatoes spilled everywhere.

And I just sit in a pew and just rub my temples.

Actually, since Bluetooth is invisible, I'm going to go, he died.

Bluetooth died.

No.

We need him for the potatoity scene.

His last words were, I don't like Niad.

Say it as a soul, Marina.

Please.

All four of us are crying.

I didn't need time to win him over.

We saw him turn invisible.

When did he die?

Explained.

He died when he was invisible, James.

He would come out of invisible.

No one was attacking them.

Strad bit him.

Strad, you're watching Straddl the whole time.

He bit his head off.

He bit his head off?

He bit his head off.

And how did he say his last words if he didn't have a head off?

I'm just curious.

I'm so sad.

Strats fits a head out, and from the ground, the head says the last words.

I don't like Naya.

She was thinking of me as he died.

It's so tragic.

Just kidding!

And then Bluetooth is going to come out of invisibility and have me filming the whole prank.

You're fucking felt for it.

Nayak jumps up and down, still crying.

It's a classic TikTok prank, really.

Just about the level of cruelty as the other ones.

Bluetooth spins around and then kicks Jinz in the shin.

Ow!

I almost died.

I have to give him some stuff, otherwise, he goes into grocery stores and spits on the produce.

Yeah, so this is like so much more innocent.

Yeah, no, that's good.

We call it Spitrus pranks.

Okay.

Yeah, he spits on the lemons and grapefruits.

Oh, good.

Yeah.

No, that's awesome.

I'm really proud of your son.

I'm glad you're a boy, mom.

Okay.

I know your son so well.

May I feed him a lemon?

I see Bluetooth kind of begrudgingly looks at you with respect.

Nak gets short of breath and pats his pockets.

But I offered, and I don't think I have a lemon nearby.

That's a weird move.

Was it a joke?

Yes, I was kidding.

It was a prank.

it was a tick tock prank

your love language yeah love language is tick tock pranks

wonder got a slurp of those pickled ghouls tongues oh my god oh did regan leave behind any stuff oh yeah what did you say like our weapons or anything yes he did okay would you like to investigate yes please yes um all right yeah so you you rough up Reagan's body and you find

a bunch of stuff.

Jins, you find your two dueling sabers.

Alright.

One is made of shimmering white steel and bears a swirling pattern on the guard and the other is jet black and has a guard shaped like a cage of thorny vines.

One of these is the Rebeckoning Void.

Indeed.

I don't remember which one.

But Jens doesn't say that part out loud.

He just goes, My swords, I know them well.

I won't let you make a study action.

Nyak, you get your Blackwing bow.

Oh my god.

And Onyx, you get the blood moon trident that you got from Moonstone.

Okay, at odds with my build, but here we are.

Also, Onyx, as you're rooting around, you find one more thing.

Okay.

You see a small jeweled key.

When inserted into the air, this key casts the Leoman's secret chest spell and gives you access to a storage box hidden away on the ethereal plane.

An offshore bank?

Can we make it?

We are finally offshore bank rich.

Is that a tax shelter in there?

We have to pay taxes.

Jen.

A tax shelter.

I always wondered how rich people did it.

And it's a magic key.

If you bank in the ethereal waters, you do not have to pay taxes.

It's true.

Oh my God.

We're going to need those tax breaks, Jen says, grimly looking at the potatoes that have fallen off the table.

Those are write-offs.

Okay.

There you go.

So, yes, you managed to find these weapons, but as you inspect them,

you see that there's almost this sort of like mist leaking out of them, and they have kind of a dull sheen to them.

And it does seem as if...

Strahd's magic has affected even these weapons and pulled some of their power from them.

So they do look like they have the potential to regain some of their lost power and perhaps awaken new abilities as well.

But currently, they're in sort of a depowered state as a result of the mist and the curse of Strahd.

So as long as Strahd retains influence over this land, the weapons won't be at their full power.

Okay.

And I will get you the stats for those later.

Okay.

But I will say, now that Reagan has been defeated, you also can level up.

Woo!

You can get to level four.

Oh, boy.

Oh, my God.

That's awesome.

So as you are cleaning yourself up from the battle, you see Ismark says, Shall we retire to the mansion?

I think I am

ready to call this funeral complete.

Yes.

Yes.

And we should probably still bury the body first.

I think that you fell in the casket.

Yes, I fell in.

That's how I remember it.

Yes.

Yes, okay.

Let's quickly bury that and then I will say the last rites and then yes, we can maybe retire and have a private soft launch potato party, yes?

That makes a lot of sense, yeah.

A private event is actually good.

It creates a lot of buzz and exclusivity.

Awesome.

So you all finally finish burying the burgamaster, and then you take the party over to the mansion.

You see that the wine moms tag along, as does Donovich.

Anyone else you want to invite, you all kind of cut loose and try out the Spudfuckers potatoes for the first time.

I'll invite Jerko.

Sorry we were so hard on you.

Oh, good.

It's okay, yeah.

I'm dependable.

I'm like an alarm clock.

You can count on me.

Yeah.

You love that clock.

It's pretty cool.

Yeah.

I guess if I become a phone, you can be a alt clock.

Wow.

Reliable?

Someone that people can count on?

Someone that can scream really loud every hour?

Yeah.

12 o'clock!

It's not 12 o'clock.

I've got a lot of work to do.

Yeah, you only get one of those an hour.

So you're on notice.

Damn, okay.

Great.

So, yeah, you all dig into the potatoes.

And as you're kind of relaxing and partying, these are only all right.

It's honestly, these are fine.

It's missing something in a big way.

Jens eats a potato with a hot dog in it

contemplatively, or however you would say that.

And I'm just looking off at the red sun setting, and

I just look at Onix and Nayak and go, I think we've been a little distracted by this bud fuckers thing.

We really got our asses kicked back there in a way that was super humiliating.

I have to be honest, now that I'm a phone, I'm just weak.

Yeah, no, Ismark did so much better than me back there.

I don't know if anyone noticed.

I don't know if they did.

Did you know

that's an affirmation?

I did notice that ismark did better than all of us okay yeah i mean he's attacking three times yeah three times i was outright killed by my own bow i also was just pretty much killed and i think i just don't even do damage and it's like we're opening this restaurant but at what cost

we're not strong

then spud fuckers can't be strong

Yeah, and I think if I'm being honest, like Bluetooth just isn't as strong as a weapon.

Yeah.

I mean, maybe we need to.

I mean, with the exception of Nayak, Onyx, maybe you and I need to get back to basics here.

No.

No?

I think I'm just going to keep being weak.

Jen rubs his head.

I'm trying to just have any kind of moment with you guys.

Hey, if you need to get back to basics, though, that's such an important thing to notice for yourself.

And I actually do.

I support that so much.

That's so cool of you to say Tatiana.

She's just

onyx right now.

She's not even dressed as Tatiana anymore.

And also, Tatiana is what Straj says, right?

It's Marina.

He was so convincing.

Why?

Why?

Jens, what are the basics that you want to get back to?

Look, all right, this like one-minute-long dance thing, I think it's not really working for me.

Okay?

I think I'm gonna go back to the sword play, all right?

Dancing with swords, Dancing with swords.

But Jerko loved your dancing.

I don't like Jerko.

I'm going, Jerko.

Yeah, isn't there a reason to stay?

Bizmark, I've kind of come around on a little bit in a way where it's just like, damn, the worst guy you know is actually a little bit cooler than you, and so I'm really struggling with that.

Jerko is still not cooler than me even.

Four o'clock.

Oh, damn, missed it again.

Yeah, that's eight hours off from what you said last time.

It's been about 10 minutes, bud.

So

let's go ahead and

do the math differently.

You might, Jerko, you might have to leave.

Yeah, you might have to just go.

Jens, do you want to try to dance with your swords on me to see if you still have it?

You got your swords back.

I think

I need time before I can sword dance again, but I think there is no.

I think we tried to launch the Spudfuckers maybe before we were ready.

I think Spudfuckers will never know peace until Strodge is dead.

Amen.

If you are going to take up the blade, perhaps I could lend you mine.

You fought bravely, and I think that it would be more capable in your hands.

She holds out this like silvered rapier.

I totally forgot.

Wait, okay, can I look at it?

Can I take out my Blade of Truth book?

Of course, I compare.

Are there spices inscribed on that thing?

So, as you do this, you see Ismarka's like, oh, that reminds me.

I will be right back.

Oh, come on.

Are you really going to go crank it right now?

No.

Are you going to go crank

your blade of truth?

I wasn't going to have a victory goon, if that's what you're asking.

That's fine.

That, yeah.

We're not asking.

Ismark shuffles out of the room, his face reddening.

And you inspect this blade as well as this book.

And you see that

the blade at its hilt has kind of a blossoming silver sunflower shape on it.

And you notice this same sort of like radiant sunflower on the Blade of Truth book that you got.

It seems like there is some sort of correlation between the two.

Can I inspect the sunflower?

See if it has anything to do with the Morning Lord or.

Yes, you are making flowers, right?

They put flowers in the grave, yeah.

Huh, you know, I never really made the connection, but this is just something my mother used to do.

She was a very crafty woman.

Again, I only have very few memories of when I was young, but

I was here whittling in her spare time, making these sunflowers, and it would bring a smile to my father's face.

Um, okay, I'm looking at this sunflower.

I'm looking at this book.

Like, what is in the Blade of Truth book?

What does it talk about?

So, um, I speed read it.

You see that the Blade of Truth book.

Holy shit, she's taking it all in.

Her hand is moving so fast.

It was written by the Olmists, who were these kind of like scholars of

Strahd initially.

This is, of course, written from when he was just a simple human man.

This details kind of their efforts to bring the Morning Lord's majesty and glory to the realm of Borovia, but via sciences and arts and various pursuits.

Is Strahd a fucking alchemist who just used sort of alchemy to become immortal and now he's a fucking vampire and he used to worship the morning lord?

Or is he was he punished in some cruel fate for bringing this god of morning and sun to never see the sun again?

Oh, that sounds more like

um onix, as you read on, you do see that there are some chapters about healing and like chants and certain rituals you can do to try and heal people from curses and and whatnot.

Okay, I'm gonna

dog earth,

even though this is an ancient book and probably should be better taken care of.

Is anyone cursed?

I shout out to the crowd.

You see that Alinka, Mirabel, and Sorvia are like, We are cursed with a desire for more of these tasty potatoes.

Okay, well, we don't want anybody getting healed from that.

Yeah, I don't want to

disabuse you.

Okay, okay, so weaponize that.

Good, yes.

Okay, then I'm just going to tux this away, and later, if someone is cursed, we have rituals.

Yeah, Marina, do you know how Strad's father died?

Strad's father.

Let me roll a history check.

Hmm.

She got a seven.

Okay.

So she says, that is a very distant history of this land.

My father...

did not wish to speak of the history of Strahd, only of his tyranny.

So I'm afraid I do not know much.

Is Strad like the first vampire here?

Yeah, I think so.

I think he invented it for himself.

He was the first guy to drink blood.

Such an innovator.

He truly disrupted the space.

A lot of the sort of manosphere is like

we have to take the blood of our children to stay young looking forever.

So that's vampiric in nature.

I'm thinking about either fasting or eating double my body weight and protein.

I haven't decided which one.

You see that Donovich

perks up.

He was kind of drinking wine with the wine moms, trying to relax and get over the despair of losing his brother to Strad.

Sure.

And he says, perhaps you should visit

the Abbey of St.

Markovia.

There you might find knowledge as well as methods for healing and perhaps removing of curses.

We are actually looking for that.

And on our way we had a vision of a cursed tree surrounded by graves.

Do you have any idea Danovich as like a have you ever done a funeral on a mound of a cursed tree?

You see that the wine moms spit.

They actually spit wine all over the floor.

Oh, right on the carpet.

And Fitbit starts licking it up.

Good boy.

You speak of the Gothias tree.

The wicked druids and witches of Strad, they have raised this tree and it saps our vineyards.

We have missed deliveries because of it.

It makes our grapes wither as it gathers power.

You must smite this wicked tree for us.

We hate it.

It's a bad tree.

Okay, is there any chance that these witches are being controlled by Strad but actually can be redeemed?

Personally, I do not know.

They're nasty folk and I do not like them.

They have very pretty kitties and nice familiars.

That is the only redeeming quality there.

But they have done some really fucked up shit to the vineyards and the lands near us.

So I cannot say.

I look at Jerko, and then I think of cool witches who have cat familiars raising evil trees in the forest.

And I'm just like, no, yeah, yeah, we'll take care of them.

We're on your side.

We're definitely on your side.

I just rub my temples again, thinking about Ismark being cooler than me.

Sport 14 o'clock.

Yep, that's not a number.

It's not Jericho.

Damn, so close that, Tom.

Not really.

So as you all discuss the possibilities of where you might go and where you are needed next, Ismark returns bearing the Silver Sunburst heirloom that he promised you.

And he says, Okay,

as promised, I have for you the Silver Sun, this relic of our family.

No, I have the Silver Sun.

I hold up my picture of of the nipple.

Excuse me again.

Jens laughs.

Ismark shuffles out of the room one more time

and then returns.

And then he hands over this sunburst to you.

And as he does,

you hear something rattling around inside it.

I crack it open.

Even Jens gasps at the gall.

May I?

I break it over my knee.

Do you want to break it?

Yeah.

Okay, I built stats in for this.

Roll me four D-100s to see how much value goes down.

Okay.

18,

16,

78.

Oh, no.

24.

Okay, so you

smashed this family heirloom, reducing its value by 136.

So now it's worth 264 gold, which is still nothing to sneeze at.

It's still a big lump of silver.

But really priceless.

As you do, you see a small scroll falls out.

Whoa.

Okay.

And on the scroll, you see the words, the alchemical and culinary musings of Alana Petrovna, Olmist Scholar of the Tome.

It's the secret spices.

It's the secret herbs and spices.

As you go to open the scroll, you see a small silver vial was actually hidden inside.

You uncork the vial, and a strong but pleasing scent hits your nostrils.

The vial is filled with herbs and spices.

Are you sure you want to give up on the restaurant?

I don't want to give up on the restaurant.

I just think the restaurant will not know peace until Straj is dead.

I smell coriander, I smell paprika, and I smell cash.

And that's where we'll end our session.

Woo, woo, woo, woo.

Thank you all so much for listening.

We'll talk more about this over on our Patreon, patreon.com slash nadpod.

That's N-A-D-D-P-O-D.

Don't sing it.

Don't do it.

We've got some things to plug.

We've got Starstruck live, Dimension 20 live show in Vegas in November.

So be on the lookout for that.

Search Dimension 20 Live.

The home of dice.

Yes.

The original rollers.

And I'll go ahead and plug HaiQ.

It's a volleyball anime that I have been watching recently, and it fucking rocks.

It's so good.

It gets me filled with a competitive spirit I did not know I had.

It makes me want to play sports.

It's weird, I know, but it's that good.

Let's get you on skates, brother.

Woo-hoo.

Hell yeah.

Right on.

And I'll plug Substack, specifically mine.

Emily's and Caldwell's, too, while you're at it.

Right on.

Remember to follow Caldwell's as a joke.

Please do.

I'm going to post once to say thank you for getting the joke.

Yeah.

And with that, you can follow us on social media that we may or may not use at CHRSME at Caldis Caldwell at Extra Demily and at Jake vs.

Jake.

And you can talk about the show online using hashtag NADPUT.

That's N-A-D-D P-O-D.

We are

youth of a nation.

We are

youth of a nation.

Well, well, well.

Would you look at that?

It's time to thank our benevolent Council of Elders, and they are Brad D., Jeffrey S, Lord of the Fjord, later McSkater, Matt M., Cutter W, W, Jeff C., Daniel G., Danielle, the Dastardly Dame, Carpe, Liam, Victor T., Balnor's Boy, Hoyt's Friend, Justin I, Danny Danster, TJM, Trele, The Cray, Christopher B, Damiel R., Jordan L., Cyborg Version of Josh the Cobalt, Targot, Stevie Waggs, Hellish Rebuker, the NBDM, PHD, Princess Yar, Jory S., Jack L, Nicholas C., star of every film ever made in Bahumia, Mike Hightower, Alka Smeltzer Smeltzer Plus, Great Value Gemma, Tyler F., Carborough, Chapel Hill, FPV, Cece Lulu, Bald Byrne, Heracule Poirot, The Rabbit Folk Detective, Timmy R., Jake's Jerk Jelly, Hashtag CCC, Cass, Skateboard, Cass, Stephen Bowie is Seattle's hockey mascot UC.

Mike K., Nick W, William W, Big Bad Beardo, the Mad, Eric McD, Anarama, Percival, Frederick Stein, Von Muscle, Klowowski, De Rolo, the third, Jay Dragonborn, Guardian of the Vibe, honoring the cock.

Impressive, Dongle, Bene, Dave H, Dustin S., Not That Nick, Danny F, Hawkeye, Pierce, Book Bar's Assistant, Izzy F.

Big Bad John, DPC is awesome.

Sean, the Shade Tree Mechanic of Zeldar, Summer RG, Mark, the Dark Lord's Taint, Kat C, Misa of House and Zunza, Ariel, the occasional mermaid, Selena N, aka Velacie Raptor, B.

Perky Always, Pat L, Lauren H, Serve 16, Annie, the the Fay Wild Therapist, Pierogi, Frenzy, Salil, BioCourt 7, Amber, Dextrous, Bean Rat, was innocent, Trub Hopdropper, Jack H, King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament, Malin, Paj, the bitch and bunny bard, Druidic Peyton, Carlin C, Noah, the Bullywog Boy, hashtag Honor the Cock, James G., Everything Bago, the Eladron who just wants to hang out with his pet badger, Stripey, Reverend Chatterbones, Han, Eric B, Marcos, Ph.D., Eventually.

Learns the Balanced Druid, Free to M.

Maggie, Holly, the Green Laughing Hyena.

Cal and her cats, Portland star, and of course, Berlin.

Aaron, B.

Russell, H., a monk named Dilgo.

Yes, the whole thing.

Yes, every time.

Cody C., Lorelei, the succubi, and Kira, the succulent snack.

McKenna, stout, your friendly neighborhood Yachney Uncle, Andrew and Sid.

Soon to be education specialist, John Adams.

Meg, the mail carrier of Bohumia, James F., Wayfarer now has to do something with the trolls.

Get rid of them, turn to page 42, keep them, turn to page 69.

Oreo, Barpo Good Barrel, Bard, Barian, Garrett G, one big curd, Charlie Brown's best friend, Renee, the monster captain, Olivia, the enchanting bard, and Jared, the soap opera cleric are now performing ballads from the age of stories.

Blue, Ash, Fico, Garrett the Artificer, Anthony, the rattest of dudes, Jay, the fairies have returned to debauchery and must now go to the carnal corner.

Cantrip Dumbledore, the Bear Onesie-Wearing Barbarian, Lexi H, MJ, the BFG, Roger L., Nodrog, the pacifist barbarian, John Luca, Shenanigans O'Connor, Mios the Great, Joshua S., Alexander, Lins W., Sky the Wise, aka the lone dungeon master, Johnny Dude K, the mischief of nadpods familiars, Pabu Eskenor, the Goliath Paladin, providing service with a smile, Kit and their cat, Jake Well Murphily, Tim M, Dragon Knight 86, Tiles L T R M L G Cheeto, Shell B, Kenna's first favorite sprite girl, very cool way to honor Beardsley's baby with a quongle.

Loved seeing y'all in my hometown.

Jet S, Snailis, who is infecting Worcestershire for within.

Vegan, Rollby, Taylor, Jared, and Olivia, who want a NadPod cookbook, Mima, Skydays, Megan, N., Anthony B, Boundlord's best friend, Steve, Stephanie of House and Zunza, Benjamin A, Gimli the Corgi, Pawpaw and Foster's canine friend, Mikkel A.

Josh H., Pilot of the Nightmareverse Flight, The 2 Crew, Blew through.

Kelsey A.

Ethan the mailman.

Maple the shy bookworm.

Ashosaurus.

Seth the stroker, bearer of all hog-related burdens.

Billy B.

Tori the tungsten, dragoose, accidental sharer of recipes.

Michael L.

S.

II.

Carl B, Plumber of the Realm.

Dex Riddlewell, Ace Dreggs, High Lord of Pritzberg.

Vin Diagram, Cadamilius the Consumed.

Clinton P.

Cam the Vampire.

Frogman.

Dean, Jake W.

High Mom.

Tuesday Cross, only here for the surf and murph.

Dave, Nadpod, saved my life but stole my wife.

Oh, Steve L, Tyler, Mick, M., Alex G, Zibby DeBackery, Kaylee, Katarina, C., Misty, the crispy, kitty, really hates flame skulls.

Greg W, there's so many of us now, but hey, you're doing great and we love you.

Thanks.

Love you too.

Baruch Thunderhelm, fifth generation Minotaur working as an abandoned labyrinth tour guide.

Chupak Aubrey, Boney is Dead, The Water Worth, Nick, Amy, Agus Kunari, Ignition Class, Petalstorm, Charlemagne, Not the God, DJ Dramameen, Alrech von Zarevich, my favorite patron, makes me say penis on my show, Chef Julie B., Jen the Rowdy, Caitlin H, and of course, Buttwax.

Thank you, everybody.

That was a head gun podcast.