C03 - Ep. 25 - From On Hyra - Sea Drinker? I Hardly Know Her!

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile.

Now, I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back.

So, I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills.

But it turns out that's very illegal.

So, there goes my big idea for the commercial.

Give it a try at mintmobile.com/slash switch.

A prompt payment of $45 for a three-month plan equivalent to $15 per month required.

New customer offer for first three months only.

Speed slow after 35 gigabytes if network's busy.

Taxes and fees extra.

See Mintmobile.com.

Who says you can't be the topic of conversation for all the right reasons?

The Hyundai Tucson hybrid pairs bold presents with advanced technology and sleek style.

It's everything you didn't know you needed in an SUV and then some.

Okay, Hyundai.

Visit HyundaiUSA.com to learn more.

Once upon a mundane morning, Barbs Day got busy without warning.

A realtor in need of an open house sign.

No, 50 of them.

And designed before nine.

My head hurts.

Any mighty tools to help with this pipe?

Aha!

Barb made her move.

She opened Canva and got in the groove.

Both creating Canva sheets.

Create 50 signs fit for suburban streets.

Done in a click, all complete.

Sweet.

Now, imagine what your dreams can become when you put imagination to work at canva.com.

Tick-tock, the clock of cannon chimes.

Thus hear my voice and heed my rhymes.

The hour is night to start your search

to hire,

find God's church.

Ro-rr-r-r-ray-make!

Yo, it's the tunnel verse, and I'm here to say I am the best Mikey Michael that's here today.

I'm so sorry, Mike.

That was a very beautiful song.

That was beautiful.

Please take an inspiration, dark blue.

I appreciate the commitment to the bit.

Oh, man.

Hello, everyone.

Welcome to Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

I'm Gustavo Sarola, your dungeon master, and I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow.

I've already been hit

in the gut, Mike, by a plane.

So, this is a little bit of a different arrow this week.

You guys have moved up to level six since the last episode.

Let's talk about your characters' new abilities and how have they been honing their skills and talents?

Like what kind of training, learning, crafting, whatever.

So let's all roll initiative and then figure this stuff out.

Initiative or D20?

You ask this a lot.

I know, because it changes each time.

I think D20 is the fair one because I have positives to my initiative.

I just roll a D20.

Roll a D20 then.

Let it be written.

Let it be done.

From henceforth, D20.

D20.

Up until our next recording session, where one of us will forget that this is the rule.

It's going to be me.

I'm going to ask for initiative again.

Eight,

14,

one.

Ooh.

Ooh, you hate to see it.

Where's your role, Chris?

It's not really one.

I just need a second to.

I was going to say, that is Chris buying time.

I was going to ask too.

So it's going to be Doug Toll Natty Gunther.

Doug, why don't you lead us off here with your fine velvety voice?

Gladly.

Thank you, Gus.

I am Barbara Dunkelman, and I play Doug Boone, the artificer bugbear, battlesmith artificer, to be more precise.

Level six today.

Just looking at you, do your eyes turn to that clearly like a secondary monitor as you read.

What's wrong with you?

You know how like when people are in couples and they become more like their couple and like mannerisms and stuff like that?

I've spent so much time like you guys, I've started taking on mannerisms now of Blaine, of like having to look.

Yeah, let's turn this around on Blaine.

Yeah, Blaine.

Let's gaslight him.

Get him.

And, you know, Doug leveled up to a big old level six.

That's an even number for those of you counting.

In case you want to.

Very scientific.

For those of you counting.

Division bow by two in three.

Exactly.

Everyone's on fire today.

We're just going to sit back and laugh and uh you know when doug leveled up what was the question again guys

let's talk about how how that happened doug what did you do to gain these skills and talents and why don't you explain what you got and how you got it does that make sense a picture of words well dude just not a whole not a whole lot that douglas here got uh actually kind of similar to you john my actual name is doug uh not john oh yeah yeah yeah just three letter word three letter names three whatever three Three-word name letters.

Three word names.

So I didn't really, you know, I didn't really get a whole lot, except I did spend some time, you know, really wanting to help my friends.

And so I learned two new artificial infusions.

Ooh.

One of which I specifically learned and studied and picked up because I wanted to help my friend Naddy.

Ah.

You know, I noticed that she likes the final things in life, you know, some glitz and glam.

And so

I made this thing, uh, it's a ring, a spell refueling ring.

I'll have to still, you know, infuse an item to get this to you, but I thought this could come in handy, no pun intended.

Artificial infusions sounds like a flavor booster available at Panera Bread for their teas.

And the other thing I got that maybe Doug would use on himself because he has been, you know, wanting to upgrade a little bit is a resistant armor and so I could pick something for this armor to be resistant against you know lightning poison all those all those fun little things that have been coming towards our way in battle so yeah that's handy what's the ring do you didn't tell me

oh I could tell you I you don't have it yet though I have to actually make it and give it to you okay oh it's like a physical ring like a jewelry ring well I'm gonna make it into a physical ring what you what wait what did you think it was he like

like a zone yeah zone like zone of truth but it's a zone of friendship and you give your ring.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay.

I wouldn't have to do that.

Yeah, like enter the ring kind of thing.

Like an octagon, you know?

Battle.

But the, this is while wearing this ring, the creature can recover one expended spell slot as an action.

Ooh.

The recovered slot can be of third level or lower.

Once used, the ring can't be used again until the next dawn.

So that's an extra spell slot.

That's fun.

Yep.

That's the most selfless thing I think our collective group has ever experienced.

Barbara just straight up just taking a feat for a friend.

That's beautiful.

Well, it's an artificial infusion, strawberry flavor.

We love a blast.

Not very often.

So yeah.

Yeah, I'm trying to be a supporting character, Hugh.

I love it.

That's usually what the gays have to do.

We have to keep all these others alive.

Whenever you use the infusion, I want you to pull out like a shaker and mix it up nice and fresh, like with ice.

Yeah.

All right, cooking up an infusion here for you.

Buris the Doug on the scene.

While we're talking about Doug, I want to make a quick clarification.

I was talking with someone on Discord for our Patreon.

If you go to stingadrangapod.com, that is one of the options you can have.

And I wanted to be sure that we were consistent going forward, that Doug using his steel defender, like deploying it doesn't take an action or a bonus action or anything.

The steel defender is just...

There.

Just there.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And it acts on your turn.

I think we've been pretty consistent about that.

So I just want to say it outright.

That way, we know going forward, you don't have to worry about like, oh, I don't have any access left for Gambot to come out or anything.

I thought it was after my turn, like directly after me.

Correct.

Right after your turn is when the steel defender goes.

Somebody decrees this episode.

Well, technically, Gambot is in the mail.

My mom is sending

me a moment.

So excited.

It's the cutest thing ever.

And it actually opens and closes, which is amazing.

Cool.

Got anything else for us, Doug?

Does it?

Well, thank you so much.

I look forward to figuring all this stuff out and seeing it in action.

All right.

Next up, I believe, was Toll.

You who?

It's me, Blayton Gibson.

Extra caffeinated today.

I have had a cold brew and I am coming after Gus.

Also, my cat is matching my energy and is running around all over the place right now.

I've got a coffee in my hand, too.

Coffee bros.

Let me see.

Ooh, John, that's a lot of coffee, buddy.

Let me see.

I play Tol.

That's Tolk, Barbara.

Don't put that down.

That's an infusion.

I play Tolv, the male orc barbarian.

He is level six, and he's not an orc.

He's a Thaumatech.

I'm still.

Wow.

This is, we keep doing this, and I keep forgetting.

And with my upgrade, good old Tolv, he has four rages now.

And he also got this thing called Storm Soul at a sixth level.

The Storm grants you benefits, even when your aura isn't active.

The benefits are based on the environment you choose for your Storm Aura.

So I am the sea storm aura.

So, I gain resistance to lightning damage.

Cool.

And I can breathe underwater, and I also gain swimming speed of 30 feet.

I have a question.

Yes, yes, Chris.

Uh, the floor recognizes Chris.

You can breathe underwater, but you don't breathe.

Okay, well, I'd like to imagine this is actually great setup because I was thinking of all the ways that, you know, what Tolv would have been doing after getting his butt kicked by Ironclad.

And I think, you know, being faced with all of the memories of the past and being reunited with Elva and going back to the Roarbu, you know, Bjorn's Roarbu, that he would take time to be more comfortable with the water.

So I think he would spend time maybe

meditating under water.

Yeah.

He hasn't touched water much since, you know, finding Bjorn and some fishing from here and there.

But I think he would take time to like, I imagine if he can't breathe or he doesn't need to breathe, he would go underwater and and that would be the only place that he could just have true quiet, you know?

So, he'd just be under the water like Ben Aflica's daredevil.

Yes, but

yes, but I like Colin Farrell.

Can I be allowed to yes and your underwater breathing here, Lane?

Okay, what if we also say that Toll can speak underwater now as well?

I would gladly take that.

What it does it sound muffled.

Sounds like if that's the rule that I can speak underwater, underwater, but I have to do that in person.

I accept this.

This is great.

All right.

Awesome.

Love it.

As far as rages, too, I think he would part of that meditation is concentrating on how much he hates ironclad.

It would give him extra rage.

Oh,

I think that that's pretty much it.

All right, great.

And I believe you passed the baton on to Natty Wonder.

Y'all.

Howdy, y'all.

It's your boy John.

Howdy, Natty.

And I'm here to play Natty Wonder.

It's a dry warlock, drag queen Mama.

And I have also upgraded myself.

And I actually, my upgrade came as a gift.

I had a dream and got to chit chat with the old wife.

And she told me that, you know, as Gigi kind of like he grows and learns new things and becomes more powerful, that she thought that I should also be able to like kind of do more things and withstand more things in order to facilitate being his mama.

So, with that, I've become even more in tune with my little angel of joy and love.

And with that, I have a new resistance to certain kind of damage in order to help me be more sturdy as a mama around him.

So, thunder damage, I'm resistant to it now.

Thank you very much.

And she said, you know, like, You know how when little kids, they get old, they can reach higher places?

You know,

kind of like Blaine's cat right there who's just reaching all heights in the room

i can now use a i i i can't i'm trying to stay in natty mode i can fly i can fly if i want to sometimes during the day not very far not very long but a little bit a little bit so you know if giggy gets up somewhere you don't want to come down i can yeah no we're not singing copyrighted songs here gustavo it's only two seconds worth so we're good and so yeah so now i can i can kind of like how giggy can turn into a little bat and fly.

I don't turn into a bat.

I just hover up a little, a little far from the ground.

I thought you were going to break the news to us that Giggy had a growth spurt and was now taller.

I thought that was what I was saying.

He was like, I don't want to watch any part of this.

No, no, I want baby tiny.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, in my head, he was just, it was like, honey, I blew up the kid where he just gets, he's still giggy.

He just gets bigger.

I'll entertain that because he turns into Snorlax at some point.

Bigger than Gunther pretty soon.

Yeah.

Meta-wise, it's a, it's at sixth level.

I get an elemental gift, which tunes me into my, um, my patron more.

I'm a genie warlock.

And so depending on the type of

Ginny, D-J-I-N-N-I, Genie, Ginny, Ginny, sure.

Genie.

You get certain resistance and then certain abilities.

And I swear to God, I didn't know this came.

You guys are going to think, like, Mateed could fly.

Why is John flying again?

I didn't know this came with the warlock.

And it's only 30 feet of fly speed for 10 minutes.

And I can cast that as a bonus action once for every proficiency bonus I have so it's three times every long rest man

yeah it makes sense for Natty to be able to fly like to me that's just fitting well I mean a lot of people don't know this I'm gonna reveal a very close kept secret all drag queens can fly you didn't know that

they just don't do it in front of the the straits yes

this is me flapping my fan there you go thank you

so yeah that's all that's all that's all that happened to to natty Just a little bit of a gift.

So Naddy, does this make you the Motallion's unofficial Air Force?

Just a one-person Air Force?

I'm the air.

You're the sea.

I am the sea.

I am the Navy.

Yeah, you're the Navy.

Yeah.

In the Navy.

Naddy Wonder Online.

John playing flying characters.

That's...

That's his, that's his cross to bear.

He always has to be a character.

I didn't even think about that either, Blaine.

All three characters of mine have been flying.

I swear, not intentional.

Euthageniah could also fly.

That would be amazing.

Oh.

All right.

Thanks.

That's a lot to deal with all at once.

But yeah, sounds good.

Thanks, John.

Welcome.

Last up, because the Rolled A Natural One that we all saw is Krista Maris.

Hi.

I'm playing Gunther, the fighter, level six.

And I...

decided to also spend some time

studying and thinking and praying.

And so I have borrowed a deep, deep hole and in it I have placed a rotting fish and some corpse of my enemy.

And I have stayed under that hole for a very long time.

It was stinky.

And I meditated and I prayed and I asked for guidance.

And deodorant.

And when I emerged, I had been fae-touched.

Oh.

So I, yeah, I got, it's, it's a, one of those, it's a feat instead of an ability, just a straight ability increase where I get to increase my wisdom by one.

And then I, I learned a Misty Step spell

and a one first level spell of my choice from the divination or enchantment schools of magic.

Misty Step is so handy.

That's such a good spell.

Especially for like someone who wants to get up in melee like Gunther and get in and out.

Yeah, I think that's great sneaky sneaky that's cool and then for my spell i picked hunter's mark that's a good one

yeah yeah i had that one for kyborg remind me again that's like you get advantage on that specific person right but you have to do it beforehand yeah like you have to put it on someone it's kind of like you get extra damage and you can like track whatever enemy you pick as that's marked.

So with a fighter where you have multiple attacks, it's a good thing to like add up damage.

Yeah, it's just a fun spell.

So, you buried yourself under a stinky fish and got fae touch.

I guess like

some some fae creature liked that.

Yes, I'm trying to create under

become the nourishment that I need.

Oh,

let's start to grow into something better than what I was.

Okay, cool.

I like it.

Yeah, it makes sense.

You smell terrible.

I'm so sorry.

If you could go underwater with me and have a conversation about this, yeah, I mean, this is coming from a guy who's literally wearing like his dad's corpse.

You smell awful.

We need to bathe you in sap.

What's your

moisturizing routine, Tolkien?

It is working.

Yeah, you know, all sorts of

necrotic skin.

Yeah, you know,

he gave me a good, uh, good bones, good structure to work with.

You know, he took such good care of himself.

A lot of bath salts.

I just assumed that you had had too much sun on the ship.

All right, let's go ahead and get this ball rolling.

I know normally we

like to wrap up these arrows a little more quickly, but I felt like we wanted to get really into the level-up process this episode.

So I want to thank the audience for bearing with us as we kind of expand on the backstory for our characters.

Thank you for bug bearing with us.

Thanks for listening to the episode, guys.

We'll see you next episode.

It's gonna wrap on Sinky Dragon.

You find yourself back on the ocean floor, surrounded by the shipwrecks, and the earth is still shaking violently.

The ships that were partially submerged in the bed of the sea begin collapsing and shaking, and some of them begin partially submerging themselves into the sand, much like a lizard.

Then the vortex of water that's swirling violently around you begins to lose momentum and then begins collapsing, and an ocean of water falls upon the entire party.

I've heard dozens of fish stories in my day, but I have to say, that is one whale of a tale.

You're all sitting at the bar of the high three, recalling your recent voyage into Nanibo to Fismum.

She slides, drinks to the four of you.

But you're missing the best part.

How exactly did you survive?

Everyone roll a constitution saving throw.

Ooh.

Is this to determine if we should correct Fismum for calling a whale a fish?

That or they're gonna pull the trap door that leads to the underground fighting ring again.

We just got here.

14.

10.

16.

Oh wait, Constitution Saving Throw?

I can actually add the modifiers.

19.

Gunther.

Sticky fish boy.

13.

So in order from highest to lowest is Natty with 19, Tove with 14, Gunther with 13, Doug with 10.

Correct.

Even though my modifier is plus seven.

Wow.

Ooh, not a great roll then.

No.

We flash back three days ago.

The sun is shining on a coast of calm waves.

We'll start with Natty since he rolled the highest.

You will see the ocean lapping up against the beach far below you as you are restrained, caught up in the rigging of a shipwreck.

The sun is beating down on you and you're utterly parched.

Natty wakes up and his star goes,

is my hair?

Oh, my hair's perfect.

Never mind.

Never mind.

We're all good, everybody.

We're all good.

We're all good.

What do you want to do to try to get down?

You are caught up in quite a bit of rope.

Your hair looks great though, but you are caught up in rope high in the rigging of a shipwreck.

Atewa, make a perception check for me, Natty.

Plus three, two, a 19, so that's 22.

As you're coming to and looking around, you realize that the shipwreck below you is part of the Dockmaster, the ship that you have wrote here on to get to Nanimo.

And as you're looking at it and realizing that, you also realize that the ship is slowly starting to sink into the water and sand below.

I didn't say it before, but Dockmaster sounds like an old early era gaming system.

Yeah, like the Commodore or Atari or something.

Yeah, well, like Kmart.

Yeah.

Eight-bit processor.

Natty would do obviously the obvious thing, which is call for her baby.

Giggy, Giggy, mama needs you.

Mama needs, where's my little sharp fanged boy who can bite through ropes?

Make a roll to see if Giggy listens or not, if he's distracted by something else.

This would be nice if he would listen.

Except I rolled a one.

In that case, Gus takes over driving Giggy.

Dang it.

Giggy comes out from a nearby jungle, some nearby vegetation.

out to the beach.

He's gone native.

Looking around for the sound of your voice.

He looks around left and right, up and down the beach, but doesn't seem to react.

That's okay.

He still looks adorable, even though he don't know where his mom is.

Love him no matter what.

You know how like you introduce some sort of foreign animal into like an ecosystem and then it just destroys it because it has no natural enemies.

Giggy in the short time he's been on the beach has been that invasive speech species.

The birds, the mammals, everything.

He's just fat from all the animals he's eating.

I'd be so proud if in that short time time he was able to upset the ecological balance all on his own.

That's just his step up and his abilities.

What a sweet neutral eco-terrorist he is going to be.

Okay, since I don't have Mr.

Gigglesworth to help, Natty actually has,

I think, a dagger.

I got two daggers in my shorts.

And Natty would use her daggers to cut through the ropes that are holding her.

And then no matter what happens, Gustavo, Natty's going to hover down from the where she's being hung from.

Oh,

I'll tell you what.

Love it.

Make me a sleight of handshake.

Love it or list it, guys.

Gosh darn it.

Pickles.

I rolled a one again.

Language, please, John.

This is a family-friendly podcast.

Great plan.

You're restrained.

Natty recalls her dagger that she has just for such situations, pulls it out, then immediately fumbles it and it falls into the sea below.

I have another one.

Okay, roll me another sleight of handshake.

Well, I have one now Maddie curses under her breath and reaches for her backup dagger okay let's do this again don't roll a one you big dummy

19 with sleight of hand plus three 21 22 you're able to you're able to free yourself from your restraint and hover down to the beach below okay cool and then i shall look for my compatriots okay as you land on the beach giggie finally catches sight of you and he runs up to you what's that What's that in your mouth, Giggy?

Oh, that's a tiny little head.

Where'd you find that little head?

I like to think that his mouth is just stuffed full of local animals, like birds and frogs and whatever he can find on the beach.

It's just all in there.

Every species of the island is in his mouth now.

Yeah, he learns every time he bites something.

Okay, make me an investigation check since you're looking for your party.

15 plus.

One, 16.

You begin looking around for the rest of your party, and as you're looking around, you realize that the shipwreck you were restrained on is gone.

What?

Well, I guess I better figure out another party to play with.

Everyone re-roll characters.

The ship is just totally not there.

It's just the sea and the sand at this point now.

Okay.

Do I need to do anything, or are you going to proceed?

I'm going to proceed.

We'll move on to our next, our next player, who is Tov, I believe, who rolled a 14.

Contestant.

Toll, you open your eyes and look around and you see you are next to rather large rocks jutting out of sand.

And unfortunately for you, you are buried up to your neck in that sand.

Uh-oh.

Uh-oh.

Nearby, a crab with three claws has caught sight of you and is eyeing you and is slowly making its way over.

Oh, this isn't good.

Get back.

Get back!

Don't do it!

My precious skin!

Alva!

Sister!

It's pointing one claw at you with two other claws to the side defensively.

Okay,

let's barter here.

If you get me out of the sand, I promise to get you delicious fishies.

You don't have to do this, Mr.

Krabs.

Are you ready?

No.

Okay, then.

We were just talking about your skincare routine.

You feel like your skin is singed from being exposed to such harsh sun.

Oh, that's permanent damage, too.

Yeah.

You know, I knew it was going to have to come one time or another.

How is the beard?

Can I keep the beard at least?

It's halfway in the sand.

It's hard to know right now.

I wanted Gus to say that the crab had already taken the beard and it was wearing it.

You look over and the crab's wearing the beard now.

What are you?

I guess I'm going to try to struggle to get out then, you know.

Okay, why don't you make me a strength check, but let's make it with disadvantage because you don't have much room to move.

Okay.

That's a...

I don't really think there's any point in rolling again.

That's a five, but...

Oh, what the heck?

I could always crit fail.

Nope.

That was 19.

So, five.

Yeah, you struggle, but the sand just doesn't seem to be giving at all.

There's no room for you to get any motion at all to use your strength to get out.

It's not giving.

I'm going to start eating it.

Yeah, I guess I'd call for people.

Natty, dog Elva, Gambot,

Gigi, I think I called you already, Pirate Pots.

What's that other guy's name?

The release half knoll?

Huh?

Captain Grumbles.

No, Captain Grumbles, the zombie, you two, but what was the other guy's name?

Lassic.

Was it Lasic?

No, he's not with it.

Laskiel.

Laskill.

Laskiel.

Laskiel.

I know we had one other.

Maybe Sea Drinker, Squid Person.

I think I've called everybody but Dog El.

Yeah.

I was going to ask, because you're very deliberately going to everyone except Gunther.

Oh, hold on, I'll call him out.

Gunther?

We'll say that since Natty went earlier, she hears your

calls.

And then, Natty, I'll leave it up to you what you want to do to that.

Yeah, I would head to the sound of Toll's ABBA-like voice.

You hear Toll calling from just a little further away from the water.

Not too far, maybe 20, 30 feet in from the shoreline.

And you see him buried up to his neck with a three-armed crab circling him.

Oh my god, Tov, where's your body?

Did your head come off?

It hears you and turns one of its claws to you, Natty.

Careful, this guy's feeling crabby.

Don't hurt me.

Natty would punt it.

Wait, the head or the crab?

No, not the head, the crab!

So the crab, you said the crab turned to me like aggressively.

I'd say it pointed one claw at you.

So it's got one claw pointed at Tove, one claw pointed at you, and another one kind of going between the two of you.

A Mexican standoff.

I point one hand at the crab with finger pistols and one hand at Toll with finger pistols.

Looks like we got a standoff here.

Please do not blast me with your eldritch blast, please.

I tell to the crab, leave or the or the head gets it.

I think the crab might not speak common.

I'm not sure.

Okay.

Natty would start charging up an eldritch blast and be like,

I don't want to say it.

I don't want to make any craps do today, crab, but you better back off.

Crab, do what she says.

She's just crazy enough to do it.

Go run for your life.

Crab, run, crab.

Make an intimidation check.

Sideways out of here.

Scurry, scuttle out of here.

18 plus 422.

Has anyone ever tried to intimidate a crab before in DD?

Are we groundbreaking here?

I feel like everything's been done at this point in DD.

A lot of weirdos have been playing this game for a a lot of years.

Yeah.

That's true.

That's true.

Yeah.

The crab begins scuttling away while still pointing its claws at each of you, but it recedes further away towards some nearby rocky outcroppings.

Okay.

Alright.

You okay, Talv?

Oh, I just, you know, got my butt kicked by my crappy dad, and now I'm buried in sand.

So, like, if you can get me out of here, I think my skin is so, so damaged.

Gigi, can you help?

Gigi's very good at digging.

You know, now that I'm looking around our surroundings, I think this is the Canary Islands.

We have to be very careful because the local ecosystem's very,

you know, there's not

extinct species everywhere, okay?

We just stop talking and listen.

You can't hear a single animal sound at all because they're just all gone.

That crab was the last of its kind.

Yeah.

I'm going to roll to have Gigi.

I rolled a nat.

20.

Thank you very much.

Just the highs and lows of Natty Wonder.

I'm going to have Gigi dig out, like the little goblin he is, dig in the sand and get Toll out.

Wow, cool.

Make me one more Gigi check.

I'll tell you why after.

I've rolled a Nat 20.

Yeah, I know.

What's he want for me?

Another check.

Eight.

Yeah, he does a really good job of starting to dig Toll out.

I know what you're going to do.

He starts squatting over the hole that he has dug.

Oh, God.

Oh, bro.

Oh, good.

I've been working on that with him.

I've been working on that with him.

I'm glad he's using it finally.

So, when we say that Tolf could speak underwater, is this what we were referring to?

Hello, everybody.

John Reising here to talk to you about business.

I'm a business owner.

I've started my own business in the last year.

Well, I started my own.

I did it with six other people.

But one thing we couldn't predict when we started this whole shebang was how many different hats we all were going to have to wear to make this thing work.

But I've got some good news.

I got one hat you can pass off to someone else and that someone else is your new business partner, Shopify.

Shopify is fantastic.

It's the commerce platform behind millions of businesses all around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S.

I mean, they've even got people like Mattel using their product.

It's pretty fantastic.

So I want to let you know you can turn your big business idea into some real

if you want to use Shopify and get them on your side you can sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash dragon that's right if you go to shopify.com slash dragon you can get a little discount you can start your business make some money and you do that all once again by going to shopify.com slash dragon thanks y'all

hey sticky dragon your favorite mortalion private here to talk to you about your most important mission yet your finances that's right, we've all had those headaches you get while trying to make progress with your finances, whether it's overdraft fees, missed paybits, or wishing you had more ways to save.

Today's sponsor, Chime, understands that every dollar counts.

When you set up direct deposit through ChIB, you get access to fee-free features like free overdraft coverage, getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit, and more.

Learn more at chime.com/slash dragon.

Chime is banking done right.

You can open a checking account with no monthly fees and no maintenance fees, and with qualifying direct deposits, you're eligible for free overdraft up to $200 on debit card purchases and cash withdrawals.

To date, Chime has spotted members over $30 billion.

That's right, $30 billion with a B.

And look, I wish I had started using QIIME sooner.

Chime has tools for daily balance updates and real-time transaction alerts to help you shape your spending habits and get on top of your financial goals.

Plus, the convenience of having access to 47,000 fee-free ATMs nationwide and 24-7 customer support really comes in handy.

Work on your financial goals through Chime today.

Open an account in two minutes at chime.com/slash dragon.

That's chime.com slash dragon.

Chime feels like progress.

Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank.

Banking services and debit card provided by the Bankwork Bank NA or Stripe Bank NA.

Members, FDIC, Spot Me eligibility requirements, and overdraft limits apply.

Timing depends on submission payment file.

Fees apply at out of network ATMs, bank ranking and number of ATMs, according to U.S.

News and World Report 2023.

Chime, checking account required.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

We've all done it before.

Turning to our barista, hairdresser, or random stranger in the bathroom for life advice.

As fun as they are to talk to about everyday topics, when you're looking for help about relationships, anxiety, depression, or other clinical issues, they may not have all the right answers.

Instead, get guidance from a credentialed therapist online with BetterHelp.

BetterHelp has been helping people find the right therapist for them for over 10 years and has a 4.9 rating from over 1.7 million client session reviews.

BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U.S.

And best of all, it's flexible and convenient.

It's completely online, so you could join a session with the click of a button at a time that works for you.

And if you feel like it's not a perfect fit, you could switch therapists at any time with no extra cost.

As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of experience.

Find the one with BetterHelp.

Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/slash stinky dragon.

That's betterhelph-e-l-p dot com slash stinky dragon.

All right, you're able to pull Tove out.

Okay, I pull Toll out and I start patting him down, getting all the sand off him.

I pull out my hair dryer that I keep with me everywhere I go and I start blow-drying him all over.

Maddie, give it to me straight.

My skin.

How is it?

What's the prognosis, doctor?

I'm not gonna lie to you, Tov.

It's looking pretty bad.

Oh no.

But don't worry.

And Naddie pulls like

a thing out of her hair that's one of those like caboodles

and just opens it up and it opens up into like a million different little sections.

I got every product under the sun and we're gonna get you looking like your Sunday best in no time, okay?

I just need to save the beard.

That's all I need.

Where is it?

All right.

Well, at this point, we will smash cut to our next person on the list, who I believe is Gunther with the 13.

Gunther, you open your eyes and find yourself on a windy cliff's edge.

You look around and realize you're about 40 feet up in the air.

You're missing all of your equipment and your clothes.

I'm naked.

As you look around and make this realization, you begin coughing up salt water, which just seems like never-ending salt water coming out of your lungs.

Make me a perception check.

13.

Oh, you found all your gear and your equipment.

It's at the bottom of the cliff directly under you.

Oh,

down.

Woo!

Jump, jump, jump, jump.

Yeah, how far down is it?

About 40 feet.

I mean, I can, that should be.

I probably just could climb down some, and a certain point I could just jump because I'm used to jumping those heights anyway, almost.

Yeah, why not?

Make an athletics check to see if you're able to climb down.

Okay.

And if it if it matters all flavor-wise, I think Guther would use his tongue to like wrap around a rock or something

at the top and then climb down.

So if he falls, he'll like catch himself.

And then he can release it.

Myself advantage because I think that's cool.

Cool.

Rule of cool.

The 19 and a 14.

So 19.

Okay, yeah.

19, yeah.

Yeah, it takes just a couple of minutes, but you're able to scale the cliff down using your tongue as as you slowly descend.

You reach the bottom of the cliff and find all your gear and your equipment strewn about on the sand below.

Make a perception check.

16.

From the south, a three-clawed crab begins approaching and points two claws at you.

Oh, God.

I found it first.

Tibbs.

The crab begins scuttling east away from you into the rocky cliff outcropping.

Oh, thank goodness.

He did not know I was bluffing.

And then I kinda equip myself with my stuff.

I feel like for a moment there had to have been Pokemon battle music, like

what do you want to do now that you have climbed down from the cliff and found all your stuff?

Well, I guess look around and see if I can spot any indication of my party or the ship or anything.

Make a investigation check.

11.

You do not see any sign of the shipwreck.

However, from your vantage point, you think you see a couple of figures down to the south near three boulders sticking out of the sand.

And you also think you hear some singing coming from the north.

Can you give us a taste that singing, Gus?

It's really hard to hear with the waves and the wind going,

but it sounds something like.

So I see two figures.

Two figures near three boulders sticking out of the sand.

And how far does singing sound like close and like close?

It sounds pretty far.

But again, with the wind and the water, it's really hard to tell.

I think I would stealthily make my way towards the figures to see who or what they may be.

Hey, make me a stealth check.

That's a 24.

Yeah, you're able to sneak your way south, and as you're doing so, darting from, you know, rock to dune, you see that the two figures to the south are Toll and Natty.

And

Natty is applying some kind of salve on Tov's skin.

Well, Giggy peas on him.

Yeah, yeah.

Then I'll come out and be like, hello!

It's a bold Gunther.

Hello, Gunther.

Oh, no.

What?

Where is Doug?

Sadly, Doug has passed away.

I'm so sorry, Gunther.

No, I'm just kidding.

I think they're on the bottom.

My constitution roll was too low.

That was to result of whoever rolled the lowest.

All right, that is a great opportunity to switch over and see what's going on with Doug.

I'm alive.

Doug, you are alive.

Doug's in a hotel.

He's taking a bubble bath.

He's got room service on the way.

He's got a drink and a coconut with a straw and an umbrella.

A whole cheese pizza pizza just for me.

Doug, you open your eyes and they're stinging because you're underwater.

And the salt water is stinging your eyes.

You feel like you're being rocked gently back and forth in the water.

Okay, could I start pumping my arms up to like swim to the surface?

Yeah, you're, it's the surface right above you.

You start doing that and you immediately pop through like you were just

a few inches underwater.

It's like being in a bunch of my toes.

Oh, I hate this.

You pop your head up above the water and you're still being slowly rocked back and forth.

You hear a song like a gentle lullaby as you're being rocked back and forth.

Make a perception check with advantage.

Rocked by what?

Oh, the water.

19.

You look around and you realize that you're being cradled in the arms of the sea drinker who is now much larger than before.

And she's slowly rocking you back and forth, singing you a gentle lullaby.

You open your eyes, recognize that she's there, and she looks at you and smiles.

Am I dreaming?

Can you pinch me?

The crab crop.

Let me double-check one thing.

No, I don't have an inspiration to die, but I'll take one.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

You're right.

You can have one.

Yeah, that was a good joke.

The sea drinker looks at you, Doug, and says, No,

this is not a dream.

Oh, okay.

Well, you're a lot bigger than what you were previously.

I assume it was that little squid guy we were carrying around, huh?

Indeed.

The water has helped rejuvenate me.

She appears to be a squid-like creature with tendrils on her face, with her body made out of water.

And yes, she is much bigger than before.

Well, did you save me?

Where what happened?

Once the ocean came crashing down, the water restored my strength.

I was able to take the brunt of the ocean's weight and surge you and your friends to the shore.

My apologies for any mishaps.

It was quite sudden.

Oh, well, clearly, you saved my life, so I'm forever in your gratitude, Misty Dwinkle.

Or Mrs.

I don't know.

Are you betrothed?

Bobby, sorry.

Armacito?

I wish there is one I love, but we cannot be together.

Oh, why not?

We should reconvene with your friends, and then we can share stories.

Okay, but

too deep to get into right now.

No point intended.

Do you see my friends anywhere?

You might have a better vantage point than I do from down here in the water.

She kind of furrows her brow and looks around.

Perhaps they are on the other side of that rocky cliff.

Yeah, that seems like a place they'd be.

Onward.

And Doug points in that direction.

Does Doug begin walking or does Doug want to be carried?

Like,

is Doug still in the sea drinker's arms pointing?

Yeah, and he's like curled up in a little ball with his hands at his face, like almost in the fetal position.

I will say as someone who spent the majority of their life being the bigger person in a relationship, the first time that I got to go out with a guy and I got to be cradled by a larger person, I was like, this is nice.

I like this.

I got to be baby.

Yeah, that was great.

And that would definitely apply for Doug.

Doug is

Doug's always the big guy, you know, but then like, it's just kind of fun to be like the little one sometimes.

Kind of a swell and a wave begins pushing you south, Doug, parallel to the shoreline.

So look, the waves are crashing to the east along the shore, but this swell has kind of like picked you up and is moving you south parallel to the shore past the rocky cliff outcropping south.

And after a minute or so, you see your three friends around three rocks that are sticking out of the sandy beach.

Tubular.

Guys, look who I found.

It looks like they found you.

Semantics, but yes.

Toll would bow deeply before the sea drinker.

You keep pointing out these large rocks around this.

Are these rocks like significant or something?

They're like one of the only landmarks in the area.

They are the landmark I've decided to orient

you guys around.

That's it.

Just to re-emphasize

your candor, Gus.

I appreciate it.

Are you in fact Najorda?

It is nice to meet you.

You are much bigger.

With a smile, she says, Yes,

I am Njorda.

Thank you for nursing me back to health with the water, Gunther.

Your aid was most welcome and most needed in my time of need i can tell by your careful use of the water gunther that you know how precious it truly is

that decanter you use belongs to me so i would like to offer you another item in its stead

okay

what is it it is

this

Seemingly from out of nowhere, she pulls out an item that appears to be an eight-handled vase.

She says, It is the octopot of obscure.

Can you make a good stew in that?

Like you just put it in and you leave it for the day?

You can use this to find things that are hidden.

Yes, this is your water, then you shall have it back.

I do not wish to steal from you.

She takes the decanter and hands you this ancient eight-handled vase.

And as you hold it, you see it has kind of a slippery texture and it's a reddish-brownish-yellowy color.

And like she said, meta-wise, it turns water into inquisitive ink.

Dribble some out, and the ink flows toward hidden things in the area.

It has a limited number of uses, but we'll cover that when it's used.

Ooh.

Thank you very much.

I shall use this.

I sense as well, Gunther, that you're searching for something

or someone.

Did the Wilderflower send you on this quest?

Or is this of your own volition?

Yes, I hope that the Wilderflower wishes for me to be searching.

That's what I do.

It is hard for me to know what decision is the right one or if I have failed everyone.

But I hope so, not.

I hope so, not.

I hope I have not failed everyone.

Oh, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

Okay.

What is it you hope to gain from this quest?

I hope to restore what was taken from us,

bring pride to my village and family, and vengeance to my enemy.

Hmm,

noble indeed.

Unless I fail, in which case I have abandoned my family for no reason.

I'm curious, Norda.

Why were you imprisoned, and who did it?

Oh,

that is a sad tale.

I plunged to the depths searching for the fire eater, hoping to find her where Marine and Magma meet.

However, it was a trap, and I was captured by Infern's underlings.

Or Undarlings, if you will.

And I was imprisoned on Nunyamo with Volcaniconda.

While there, my suspicions were confirmed.

The Fire Eater is indeed imprisoned in the fiery depths of Undar.

Natty nudges Doug and goes, Man, Marina Magma would be a great club name.

I think that is like that is just a lava lamp.

Marina and Magma.

Why were you searching for the Fire Eater?

The Fire Eater is my one true love.

However, I have been forbidden from pursuing her, and I have been bound to the sea.

I have been doling out my duties to the other deities and demigods, trying to find time to reunite with the fire eater.

It's one of those only at the once-a-year end-of-year party that you all get to hang.

It is not easy.

Hence the desire to go where sea and magma meet.

So why would Undarians want to imprison you?

Why do they care?

They seek the Pathfinder and are trying to get any information they can.

Is the Pathfinder like the key to finding you all?

Like Pathfinder can find stuff, so if you want to find a bunch of gods, you get the god that can find the other gods first.

The Sea Drinker turns to you, Natty, and says, Yes.

The Pathfinder has an ability to find anything hidden with very little to go on.

All the Pathfinder needs is time.

i think the pathfinder also is they're looking for the pathfinder to also find the gates of hyra

i mean yeah if you got somebody that can find anything that's pretty useful yes all they need is time and it can be found well luckily we got this jug of water that we could pour to things that we're trying to look for yesterday

since you spoke up natty i think the sea drinker would address you a little further.

Addy.

It's a pleasure to formally meet you, Natty.

Please give your best to the silent steed next time you speak.

I will.

Natty's toes.

That's my gal.

Oh.

And

are you all friends?

Like, do you guys all like...

Do you maybe meet up for like, I don't know,

like, do some Sudokus together or something?

As friends, too.

They have the same Pilates class.

A Pilates class.

Yeah, that would work out yeah yeah yeah cool we've met before

but we haven't spent much time together but i know that you know what it's like to be apart from a loved one so if there's ever a time that you need a favor use the necklace and call upon me using my true name and then she mouths njorda

wait do i have a necklace now i told the necklace oh oh okay okay yeah that'd be great that'd be great i appreciate that That's very kind of you.

And I'm sure I don't have to remind you, but just as in long-distance relationships, trust is key with true names.

I trust you and your friends to keep my true name secret.

Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know it was a secret.

I think the unwilling knowledge of my true name is how I was apprehended and nearly finished by the Undami.

Every deity has a true name, but very few speak of it.

What's the significance of that?

Since we got you here, maybe you could expand upon that a little bit.

And I'm just going to warn you, I'm a simple girl.

I like simple talk.

So like metaphor and mystery just goes right over my big old wig.

True names lead to true power and true control.

Yeah, that is that wasn't that wasn't straight up with me.

I just be more and more direct with myself.

What's like, what is the direct result of someone knowing your name?

Does that mean they got like power over you or they can uh they can uh maybe find you easier or or what?

They just don't want you using their full government, okay?

This is different for each, GH.

But if we all have a weakness, it is our true name.

Dad, do you do you know about this?

Is this something that there's something that you're aware of?

No, but it makes me wonder if maybe we should change our names, cause uh

if people know what you're names, is that gonna

that they're gonna have power over us?

Like, should I go by like Douglas?

Good?

Good.

Perfect.

I think we have different rules than they have different rules, you know?

Okay, so we shouldn't tell people your full name.

We should just call you City Drinker.

Yes.

And

where are we?

Sorry, no one's asked that yet.

Where are we?

I mean, I love a beach, but I just want to to know where we are.

We are at the edge of Endridge Bay.

It's not far from here.

The Edridge Bay?

That's convenient, thank you.

Do you know what happened to our companions?

And our not companions?

I suspect they're around here, in the nearby vegetation and jungle, and they should be reconvening with us soon.

Nanny startles up.

Captain Grumbles, where's Captain Grumbles?

I don't even look for him yet.

Where is he, Captain Grumbles?

Where's the point of it, Podge?

we're going to be in so much trouble with the Mortalian.

Captain Grumbles could be dead again.

I'll say at this point that each of your different party members slowly starts coming out from the jungly-y vegetation and reuniting with you guys.

Okay.

Wait.

All of our NPCs are back.

Hey!

Let the record show Gus is the one who said they're all joining us again, okay?

You asked.

I have been bowing this entire time and my back is kind of aching and I I would love to join the conversation, but uh hello sea drinker.

I am your faithful follower Tolv.

Uh you knew my adopted father Bjorn.

Just in case you didn't remember who I was, you know, no big deal.

All right, as you stand back up from your bow, a small scrap of paper falls out from your pocket.

Is it the uh the note to Bjorn?

Yeah, who is that note you had uh picked up?

Talks about how uh she gave him a uh necklace and it's a twin of their own oh no it's a it's a different note this is the one that was on the front door of the roarboot don't remember that note so many notes which one is that you should take notes you take a look at it oh oh oh bjorn your order is ready for pickup come by uh the untamed flame forge from shannon

oh i i forgot we have a to-do list of things here in indridge bay i'm gonna put that back in my pocket yeah you know when you bowed and rose up you mentioned your connection to Bjorn.

The Sea Drinker would look at you, Toll, and ask, Oh, what news of Bjorn?

He helped me on my quest to try and find the fire eater.

Yeah, so as you can see, I am wearing his flesh, so not good.

Um,

I am like his adopted robot son, and he has sadly passed away.

But in his final act, he allowed me to take his identity to protect me because, uh, well, I'll just go ahead and show you, and i'll take off the bjorn face mask to you who it's me told if i'm actually a thawmatec boo spooky spooky

the passing of bjorn is a loss to us all did you perhaps receive a gift from bjorn i mean many gifts knowledge uh good memories

His skin, you know, I the list goes on and on.

Fish recipe.

A fish recipe.

Yeah, yeah, that was good.

That was good.

Very good.

I'm still looking looking for the deed to the Roarboo.

You know, I might have that.

Might have a little bit of oceanside property.

You could turn it into an Air D ⁇ D.

Yeah.

Wow.

That's good.

Oh, that's good.

Oh.

Hey, guys.

I don't know if you all remember this.

Coconut?

Coconut.

I'm looking for anyone, Blaine, Chris, and John to remember this.

Coconut.

Oh, oh, oh!

Coconut.

Coconut.

Coconut.

Yes.

John?

Coconut.

Chris.

Oh, Jess, coconut.

John.

I don't think you were on that episode.

Still the beans.

Not even remotely triggering anything.

Many, many second wins ago,

it was me, Blaine, Chris, and John.

And we agreed that we would have a code word for when we want to give Gus an inspiration die.

Coconut.

The decree of coconuts has been changed.

Jesus.

Barbara deserves inspiration dies for remembering that.

Wow.

The flame of coconut calls for aid gus you can you may have an inspiration inspiration die from the blade joke we wanted to be able to give so this is you you can roll an inspiration dice for something that you got coming up little peek behind the screen for our listeners here i when we play you know we use dnd beyond i do have a character sheet that i use as the dungeon master i'm going to give myself an inspiration die on there it has been done oh wow gus is hovering now above his keyboard

the light just coming from his eyes i can't wait till like four or five episodes from now i'm going to use it, and you all are really gonna regret calling out that.

We know what we're doing.

We know what we're doing.

We're giving power to someone who already has all the power, but you know what?

It's a good joke, Air D.

Anyways, was there something specific, uh, Sea Drinker, that I should be looking for?

I, I, other than this necklace?

The Sea Drinker smiles and says, I'm sure you'll come to it soon.

Great, cool.

Okay.

Then he turns to Tull of and goes, see how it feels when someone's all vague and mysterious and holds secrets and everything.

She speaks riddles and mystery.

What are we supposed to do with that?

Nothing.

Nothing.

I already tried, but she just keeps going around in circles around the direct point.

Okay, also, Sea Drinker, you mentioned earlier the Volcaniconda have taken you hostage.

I'm going to be so for real with you.

For the sake of my survival, I struck a bargain with the Volcaniconda.

I'm still in allegiance to you.

I love you.

Number one Sea Drinker fan.

Yo-Yo.

But the Volcaniconda might come calling for some ice cream down the road.

I'm just giving you the heads up.

We can deal with that when the time comes.

I'm so glad that's off my chest.

I've been feeling terrible.

You say that the Undarians had taken you to gain power.

Why was Ironclad also searching for you?

Is he in league with the Undarians?

That I do not know.

I cannot speak the motivations of others.

Interesting.

Is Elva around?

Yeah, we'll say Elva has come come out of the jungle as well and is probably, we'll stay right there with you.

What's Elva's reaction to Sea Drinker?

I don't know if Sea Drinker was a thing that popped up on my radar as a result of my interactions with Bjorn or if they also had some sort of

assistance from the beyond or anything like that, you know?

I'll say that she seems, you know, of course, awestruck to be in the presence of a deity, but maybe not quite as reverent as you are.

Okay, all right, cool.

Also, this is my sister Elva.

Yeah, so I mean, I guess should we do we have any other questions for the sea drinker?

I mean, what do we do now?

Because we still have like kind of a mission to go about, you know, like, should we uh did we figure out why they were impersonating people?

I mean, we figured out that they were impersonating people, but I don't think we figured out why.

Oh, the Undarians?

No, that's the whole reason we were sent to Andridge, to the Hendridge Bay was for our mission of like, people are impersonating people.

We gotta figure out the, what's going on with that.

And we we figured out that they're doing that, but we don't know why.

Yeah, speaking of, you know, I was under, I was in disguise.

I wonder if maybe the Mortalian was aware of something like me and other Thaumotechs like Elva here.

Sea Drinker, have you been able to see like other siblings of mine?

I have so many brothers and sisters, and they all got scattered to the Vins once we rebelled against Ironclad.

I can't say I've seen any, but I have heard tales from sailors swapping stories.

One spoke of metallic creatures hiding near the riverbanks of the boiling bluffs.

That's where I met the fire eater.

Another told a tale of a shiny person shouting curses amongst the reefs of Tropicairn Island.

That sounds like one of my siblings.

Are we gonna have to like collect them all kind of situation?

There are 12 of us.

Do you want me to tell you all of their names?

I actually have photos photos of all of them.

Here, let me get up my wallet.

And then we can go find the elite four.

There's Tio and Neo, that's 10 and 9.

Atta, Shu, Sex.

We don't talk about their name.

That's just their name.

It's

very funny, sex, but anyway.

Femme Fira, Trevor.

Let's talk about sex.

Twa and Et.

And I don't know if I know Noel or not, but there is.

Talk about you and me.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, so gang, I have like a couple of short things things that I need to do.

I know I need to go into town to pick up something from Shannon.

And then also, I would love to follow up with this metal person rumor because that might be one of my siblings.

So that's me.

At this point, the sea drinker chimes in and says, Perhaps you can follow one rumor, and your sister Elva can follow the other.

I like that, yeah.

Split the party, get rid of some NPCs.

Yes, yes.

I cannot divert from my mission from the Mortalion, and I have fear that if I do, it'll attract more attention to us, you know, Thaumatecs on the run.

So I'm going to like stay in line and do my current mission.

Well, I will say this, from a geography perspective, Boiling Bluffs is only about six miles northeast of Fort Endridge.

So minor detour.

Right, versus Tropic Cairn Island, which is more out of the way.

I see.

Okay, then maybe you go to the Tropic Cairn Island, and then we go to the Boiling Bluffs if my gang is, like, so cool and wanting to go on a little detour.

Elva nods at that.

I'll follow you wherever you deem necessary, Tov.

Well, that's nice of you.

Wait, who's in charge right now?

I don't know.

Tov.

Private parts, who's in charge?

Is Tov?

Is Tov in charge?

No, you are, Doug.

Now I decree.

Toll.

It's like a hot potato at this point.

Well, if we're on a mission for potentially his family members, I feel like you should go.

I got no objections.

Don't you want that, Max?

Cooper loves that shoe, too.

Oh, now he's into Cooper's food.

Wow, he is loving it.

What do you feed Cooper?

Blue Buffalo Life Protection Formula.

He never leaves a crumb.

I love it because it's made with high-quality protein, nutrient-rich fruits and veggies, and wholesome whole grains.

Looks like we're switching to blue.

Blue Buffalo foods are made with the superior ingredients your dog needs to thrive.

Can your dog food say that?

Visit feedbluefood.com to learn more.

Here at the Almond Joy Factory, where tropical vibes abound, we use soft, fresh-tasting coconut.

The crunchiest almonds and delicious chocolate candy.

Ah, but do you know what our most important ingredient is?

Sometimes you feel like a nut.

Sometimes you don't.

Almond Joy's got nuts and something even way better than that.

yes almond joy is made with almonds and joy

sweat moves you forward degree antiperspirant is here to make sure it never holds you back clocking in sweat lunch meeting sweat biking home sweat degree advanced is for the hustlers who put in the sweat the world's number one antiperspirant with up to 72 hours sweat and odor protection degree here for sweat try it today

Okay, so

let's pull up the start menu list of missions and side quests.

Pole needs to go to Indridge Bay to pick up a potential weapon upgrade, which would be so cool.

We're going to go to the Boiling Bluffs, which is just a six-mile detour.

As far as Indridge Bay, have we followed through with everything that we were assigned to do here?

Because I know that we also have a time limit to get back.

I know that Gunther had his aunt that was there he wanted to speak with, but that's not like pressing in any way.

That was just a thing on the if we go back.

And then also, Gunther would want to use that item he got to look for the thing that was stolen from his village.

Okay, specifically, Gunther and Tov make me wisdom checks.

Ooh, strong.

Four.

14.

You know, thinking about your aunt, you remember that when you all looked at the note earlier that Bjorn's item was ready for pickup, that that was signed by your aunt.

So presumably it would be at the same place.

Isn't that nice?

Let's go knock it out.

Yeah, let's do that.

Let's get this out of the way.

So, want to point out, if we do eventually make our way to Boiling Bluffs, it's possible that the Fire Edo might be there.

And so, I don't know if we should take the Sea Drinker to maybe reunite.

Well, we should probably ask the god if they want to come.

Yes, he drinker, what are you doing?

Hey, you got any plans or are you free?

What's your schedule look like in the next couple days?

Do pincil us in?

I do have a task I need to complete.

However, I require your assistance.

It requires backstabbing, thieving, and general scoundrelism.

Laskiel, you're a buddy.

Yeah, Laskiel leaps up at the thought, and the Sea Drinker turns and addresses Laskiol and says, I need help finding and freeing the fire eater in Umdar.

Once we uncover more details, I may call upon you four for help.

You got it.

As she's looking at you, four, and you say, you know, you got it, Doug, she looks at you again.

You know, she was cradling you, and says, I sense something within you, Doug.

Something you're not proud of.

Something from your past.

I know what that feeling is like.

I too feel shame for giving up the name of the veiled eye to the Privateer.

You did that?

If anyone knows where the Pathfinder is, it's the Veiled Eye.

However, I was able to resist the torture enough to not tell the Privateer where to find or how to reach the Veiled Eye.

So the gates of Hyra will remain safe for now.

I bring this up to you, Doug, because I sense that you've already made a connection to the Veiled Eye, which is a rare gift indeed.

That's correct.

How did you know that?

I can see it upon you, for the Veiled Eye ever searches for those that think outside the box.

Mortals with new ideas.

As you know, he is the patron of seers and inventors.

Those who wish to find him must prove their accomplishments by presenting a unique invention, a device, or a physical creation.

As a reward, he may grant such a patron with a mysterious vision or mystical encounter.

So I want you to down in my head, of course.

You are such a visionary, Doug.

Oh, nice, nice, nice.

So, I'm confused, though.

You said, like, your real names you have to be kept secret, and you know this.

And so, why did you give the Veiled Eye's real name to the privateer?

I did not reveal the Veiled Eye's true name, merely the knowledge of the Veiled Eye.

Oh.

Do you know that the true names of any gods that are mean that we could use to fight them?

I would say that that the sea drinker would uh smile and say, I don't think you have the power necessary to wield such knowledge.

Yeah, I might not, but maybe Doug does.

I don't wish to make enemies of any further deities.

That's my fair enough.

If I were to whisper a name to you, could you confirm or deny whether or not it's the veiled Eye's identity?

Y'all, y'all.

This poor guy's trying to walk around, not giving people's real names out.

You guys are all messing with them.

The TV Truther would just smile and say, no.

She's not going to play your game with you.

All right, Meta Talk.

Was Maestro Pharynx the person that I had that vision with?

Yeah.

In episodes past, are they the Veiled Eye?

I knew Gus was going to say that.

I was like, there's gonna be a classic gus uh-huh if the character that knows it won't tell you then why would it gus

I think with that the sea drinker would uh address Laskiel and say let's be off Laskiel

we have much work to do are you going to hold Laskiel like you held dog how are you going to transport around I think yeah Laskiel would wade into the water and the sea drinker would transform into a wave again and it would almost look like Laskiel surfing off into the sea Normally, when you surf, you surf towards the beach, but surfing away from the beach.

There he goes.

Wow, so cool.

There goes my hero.

Just like point break.

He pulls out a pair of sunglasses, and then Gunther mutters, Via Condios.

And then that takes us back, flash forwarding to you four sitting around, having a drink at the high three.

Oh, yes, right.

We're here.

This alcohol is very strong, very stiff.

That's waddle.

Okay, so now that you all are back at the high three, what is it that you all would want to drink and what would you want to eat?

What are you...

Paint me a picture here.

Well, you know, I heard so much about fish.

People cooking a lot of fish.

You got any fish dishes?

Oh, you're going to put this back on me, huh?

All right.

One moment.

I assumed you are the keeper of the menu, a special god here at the high three.

You're right.

I think I had one.

I just don't have it in front of me where it was.

The deity of hunger and

lunch specials.

What's your happy hour right now?

There's blubber bisque, stale carp, piranha porridge, mmm,

stale carp.

That sounds appetizing.

I think that that's what Gunther buried himself with.

Yes, I prepared some myself.

Gunther knows that fish.

What about anyone else?

Well, now that I don't have to keep up my act, actually, I guess I should to other other people.

Wait, at this point, is my skin damaged?

Is Tolv's skin like no?

Natty helped you out, remember?

Okay, okay.

At some point, I don't know when it's going to be, and I might need it to be called out.

I wouldn't mind if Tolv is in his more robot form, but he wants to keep the beard.

But I don't know when that time will be.

I don't know if people are going to be freaked out by the

ultimately your call.

That's whenever you're ready for that.

That's not an us call.

I like to think that you're looking a bit like the bad guy in men in black towards the later half where you're.

Water.

Do you have any...

I'm just curiosity.

Do you have any like motor oil or any sort of like, you know,

I just need a good lubricant.

It's been a while, you know.

Any machinery like WD-40?

No motor oil, but I could get you some grease from the kitchen.

Okay, I'll take that.

Bismum...

Furrows her brow at talk of a motor, not quite understanding what it is you're asking about.

But she does go to the back and returns with some bacon grease.

Cool.

I chug that.

Gunther?

Natty?

I'll take whatever is gonna be like sustaining, but if it's like, if there's like bugs or something, that's cool.

It's not on the menu, but this is a seaside town, so I'm sure we can find you something.

What about shrimp?

That's like bugs of the sea, right?

Yes,

I like it.

Yeah, they can offer you some shrimp.

I'm okay.

I'm good.

Okay, nothing for Natty.

As you all are eating and drinking, you know, recounting your tales to Fismum, you notice a couple of posters behind the bar.

Is this like a Planet Hollywood?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They got autographs on them.

What's in the posters, Gustava?

You see, various things.

One of them seems to be a call-out wanting songwriters for troop troop.

And there's another one that's a Build Your Best Contest from the Council of Conservation.

I recognize that name.

We've heard that name before.

Those were the two pirate groups that I think we encountered right below where we are standing right now remember in the the pirate pits the fight pits yeah personally doug i think you're shoe into in that one the songwriter yes

i'll build i think naddy's probably more of our songstress here you take a look at the poster a little more doug because it catches your eye the poster conveys that with the sudden shortage of lumber in the bay area the council of conservation is sponsoring a contest for inventors to bring innovative contraptions devices or designs that utilize materials other than wood.

The invention should embody the values of finding and rescuing endangered wildlife.

And the winner gets an all-expenses paid visit to the menagerie and an evening with lead conservationist Mimi.

And

should send a raven to Mimi.

I mean, Doug, I know we're on a military mission and we have so much side quests and things to do, but like, that is like your science fair.

That is your thing.

I've already started working on my project.

Oh.

Do you have the trifold trifold foam core presentation thing ready to go and everything?

Yeah.

It's called a volcano.

This one is about different densities of liquid.

So you'll see here in this jug, we got water and oil.

See that clear separation?

Yeah, yeah.

Viscosity.

Okay, since it's only a raven, I think while we're going to the shop to meet up with Gunther's aunt and to pick up my package, Doug, you can send a raven in with your invention idea.

Natty, I mean, come on, you got to to keep sharp.

You got to write lyrics.

You got to send a raven after the other thing.

And then we can all have fun, participatory things for this episode.

What's the prize of the other contest here?

The troop troop.

You know, y'all take a look at that one, and it's a poster indicating that troop troop is looking for a songwriter of both talent and experience.

Audition is required.

Payment is negotiable, and interested parties should send a raven to Duke.

You want to buddy up on a raven, or guess we gotta send two different ravens?

Two different ones, yeah.

But You know, you get them at pretty cheap in this town.

Okay.

Two birds for one stone.

Yeah, let's let's send it.

Let's send a message.

I'm down.

Let's show this world we got, Doug, okay?

Okay.

As you all are talking about this, a somewhat tipsy orc comes up and pats, let me roll the g4.

Tolf on the back and says, serving in the mortalion, huh?

Keep in mind that Tolv's Bjorn skin, which is an orc, is very visibly damaged.

Think in black, that one guy with the sugar water.

So I look horrifying and I go, Yeah, what's up, fellow orc?

Whoop, whoop.

I think this orc is a little tipsy enough where he doesn't care.

Pleasure to meet you.

I served in the mortality myself.

Orman, nice to meet you.

He reaches out a hand.

Well, Orman, instead of a handshake, how about I give you a salute?

Because I don't want to touch him.

He switches and tries to stand up straight and give a salute, but he's a little unsure on his feet.

And he points to his chest.

I served in the Mortalian.

Look at all my medals.

And he's got like a couple of medals on his chest there.

Maybe you know our friend Private Parts, huh?

He does that thing where he's like squinting.

He gets his face real close to Private Parts.

Don't think I do.

Let me buy a round for my Mortalian friends here.

No, don't everyone thank me at once.

It's okay.

Thank you so much.

You are the best.

He turns to Fizmum.

A round of octopus for my friends here.

All right.

Delicious.

That will be 32.

None Finati.

She's driving.

Yeah, I'm actually good.

I'm going to pass

on your very generous offer.

More for me.

Ormond grabs your octopus and downs it.

It's like a chunky, bubbly drink.

Kind of like an oyster shooter.

Ooh.

Yuck.

That sounds disgusting.

Can I share like a look with Fizmum and kind of just get a vibe check on this guy?

Like maybe a subtle thumbs up or a thumbs down, you know, like do we like Orman?

Is he well respected and liked in this town?

Is he trustworthy?

Fismum looks at you and just, you know, kind of rolls her eyes and shakes her head.

She reaches over and puts the drinks into Orman's hands and pats him on the back and says, All right, you get out of here, Orman.

Go back and sit at your table and leave these good people alone.

Okay.

So he's a known quantity here, then I guess he's just kind of a

little local drunk, I suppose.

He's the Barney

of this establishment.

Yeah, maybe, maybe.

So, I guess you all send off your Ravens and wrap up your meal and your drinks here at the High Three.

What's your next move?

Well,

should we get to your guys's little errand about your seeing your aunt and checking out your upgrade?

I think we should.

I think you should start thinking up some lyrics there, Music Master.

Well, I might have to stop thinking about lyrics at some point to start again.

Oh, nice.

I like that.

Whoa, whoa.

i could i could hear the dial-up connection sound as blain was probably was processing what i just said i'm still processing what does it mean did i upset john did i was that a good thing are they confident in their writing abilities i like how much that just kind of

dang your brain

what does it mean i don't know Guess you have to think about it.

Maybe it's a thinker.

Maybe it's tonight, Barbara, you'll sit up.

You're like, oh, I get it.

That's what he meant.

All right.

Yeah.

So let's move on to wherever that, what was it?

You don't even know.

What were the details of this thing that we have to do?

Shannons.

You're heading to the untamed flame forge.

Yes.

FizMum gives you directions, leaving the high three on how to get there.

And you walk outside into Endridge Bay and walk over to the Untamed Flame Forge.

And as you're walking out there, as a contrast to how it was before, the storm that had been raging before seems to have passed and it's now sunny outside.

You walk up to the Untamed Flamed Forge, and you find it to be from the outside, it's a shack.

It's a mishmash of metallic patchwork and hinges.

It's an unusual architectural arrangement of slanted walls and roof.

There's a squeaky hanging sign that reads Untamed Flamed Forge.

It's like kidmashing architecture.

Yeah.

Alright, this looks like the place.

Gunther, are you ready to see your aunt?

Yes, I'm very anxious to talk to her.

Hello!

Gunther calls out hello, and the door slowly opens, revealing a thickly built, youthful-looking Ode.

The smell of smoke comes out from the building, and you see some smoke appear behind her.

She is clad in obsidian iron, like a combination of obsidian and iron.

She looks at you four and says, I am Shannon Egan's Windbreaker.

Who are you?

I am Gunther Bootkiss Windbreaker.

Gunther Bootkiss Windbreaker?

On guard!

And she leaps forward and attacks you.

What?

Is this like a family tradition or something, or should we hold?

Find out what it means and how Gunther perishes in the next episode of Tales from the Sneaky Dragon.

I'm used to my aunts pinching my teeth, but not drawing a lethal weapon on my teeth.

Pinching my cheek.

You have some weird aunts here in Texas.

The Gibsons have a strange family tradition.

Weird folk.

Is your aunt the tooth fairy?

We'll talk about in second wind whether or not Blaine's aunt is the tooth fairy.

But find out what happens to Gunther in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

Did you know September 5th is this year's Smarsh Day?

That's right.

You can check it out on the live stream.

We're going to have a live stream on the Stinky Dragon YouTube channel.

It's going to be running from 6 p.m.

to midnight Central Time.

We're going to have the whole Stinky Gang.

We're going to have games, hilarity, announcements, all in celebration of Smarsh being king.

Again, that's September 5th, 6 p.m.

to midnight Central Time.

And you can find that live stream on the YouTube channel.

New episodes of Tales from the Stinky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday for every stream podcasts and on the Stingy Dragon YouTube channel.

Want to listen to the show 48 hours early and ad-free?

You can support us by becoming a patron at stinkingdragonpod.com or join as a member on beacon.tv.

Both give you early, ad-free access, and a member-only Discord for each respective platform.

If you're looking for even more stinky content and community perks, our Patreon offers exclusive bonus shows, behind-the-scenes content, access to the Stingy Dragon Discord, member-or-only live streams, stink community events, and a shout-out on the the show just like survey pound zero survey hash zero one of those hillness samantha lerose man average and bethany stevens these patrons directly support the show get ad-free episodes access to our patron only discord server bonus content like second wind and behind the screen and other stinky perks here's a quick peek from the latest episode of second wind That's really interesting.

You know what's also interesting?

What happened at Home Depot?

So Chris and I were out to buy the materials to build this basically window unit and also to buy the AC unit itself.

And just going with Chris to a public place, I mean, you guys have all been around Chris.

Like,

you can't predict him.

It's like, it's kind of like when you see parents out and they have like a leash on their kid and you kind of judge him a little bit.

He's fast.

Like, I feel like anytime I've gone anywhere with Chris, he just takes off.

And I'm like,

wait for me.

Chris is just an adventure, you know?

Sometimes

you just got to go go hang out with him in a public space and it really like opens your eyes to things, you know?

I feel like it's a marvel at how he...

He's alive.

Yes.

Once again, that's all at stinkydragonpod.com.

We're incredibly grateful for your support, which makes this show possible.

Some of our friends voiced NPCs in this episode, and listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky Dragon Discord had NPCs named after them, just like Orman, named after Orgamus.

Fismum, named after Kim Karis, voiced by Aaron Zeck, at Aaron Zeck.

Shannon, named after Shannon Logan, voiced by Ashley Burns, at Ashley Burns from Morning Somewhere, and of course Rooster Heath.

And the Sea Drinker, voiced by Laurie Bird, at lorry.bird.

That's L-A-W-R-I-E dot B-I-R-D.

This episode of Tales of the Sticky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst, written, edited, and composed by Michael Reisinger, with additional editing work by Catherine Arnold and David Sonia.

Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales of the Sticky Dragon.

I get PTSD every time someone mentions the science fair solely because, and this is actually, this is lore for myself and my mom, mother of puppets.

There was one year of the science fair where I had procrastinated too long.

It was due soon.

I got a stomach virus, was just exiting everything inside of my body constantly.

My mom also had, was sick as well.

And we both were just remembered.

I have this core memory of being in the living room of our house.

And my mom's like doing the mom thing, trying to finish the project for me, and then begging me to get off of the couch that I'm groaning on to like come contribute a little bit before I go lay back down because I can't do anything.

It was one of the most miserable moments of my entire life.

And I think it is for my mom as well.

Yeah, I just like you mentioned that trifold poster board.

I was like, a shiver went down my spine.

Worst thing ever.

Witness the mountain majesty and rich creative culture of Colorado's heartland and Fort Collins.

The perfect place for your last-minute summer getaway.

Hike or bike around Horse Tooth Reservoir and explore beautiful scenery on more than 280 miles of trails.

Finishing with a pint at one of Fort Collins' many local breweries.

Listen to live music at venues like the iconic Mishawaka Amphitheater and all summer with free outdoor concerts happening weekly.

Start your adventure and plan your visit now at visitfortcollins.com.