#635: Step Counts

Send somebody through a Van Aylen belt and get them back.

And then I'll say, Yeah, you got a big deal.

Horses are constantly trying to commit suicide.

What?

It's inappropriate, and it's wrong, and it's mean, it's bullying, blah, blah, blah, all this other shit.

I was like, oh, my fucking God.

Tell him, Steve, Dave.

Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave.

We've got no cue here this week.

Walt, he's out being fancy.

He's out acting like a colonel over in Kentucky.

Is he betting on the horse race?

Does he know the ponies?

I don't think so.

He's never mentioned it before.

I think it's some kind of charity thing that he's doing.

Is horse racing becoming a thing of like a dinosaur?

Is that like being fancy?

People are like, it's mean.

Well, not only is it mean, but it's like, I don't think young people

are into horse racing.

I mean, I knew some old-timers.

My grandfather was into horse racing, had

formulas written up, and a wheel, like he would, like he would spin.

There was like this wheel that he had.

I couldn't follow what he was talking about, but he was so into horse racing.

I just don't, I haven't

met anybody since my grandfather who was into horse racing.

I went to

this, it was like a some kind of party where all the sopranos were there.

It was a party that Mike was supposed to get me in and then failed, so I had to rely on Furio.

And it was at the up in North Jersey at the what is it called?

Is it Belmont?

No, not Belmont.

Is it the Meadowlands?

Yeah, is it just the Meadowlands?

And I watched, I bet on a horse.

I came in dead last.

And that's the only time I've ever been to a horse race or bet on a horse.

Yeah, there was a couple of times for Mother's Day when my mother-in-law was alive that we all met and went out for Mother's Day at

what's the one that's

Monmouth Park.

And a lot of people did show up, but they say it's just for Mother's Day, though.

Like,

every other Sunday is not like this.

But I'm like,

what mother really wants to go hang out at a fucking racetrack, though?

It's usually going to be a little bit warm.

There's a lot of people around.

It smells.

It's kind of like a picnic atmosphere to it.

You got guys doing karate in the intersections.

But hasn't Monmouth Park folded yet?

No.

It's not going to?

No.

I thought it was.

Freehold.

Freehold folded.

Freehold folded.

Freehold's done.

Hey, Jeff just showed up.

Last year, I saw that.

I was just waiting.

I was waiting for my introduction.

So I thought I was just listening.

Hello.

I guess we're breaking etiquette this week.

Have you ever gone to the

twice?

Boring as shit.

Isn't it?

Yeah, it's like.

It takes about two seconds for the horses to race, and then there's about 25 minutes in between races.

Yeah.

But you'll never see anybody more excited than a person who's winning on a long shot.

I mean, holy shit.

I actually like the ones with the Metal Lands ones with the chariots or whatever they are.

The

harness racing.

They're actually a little bit more fun to watch.

Why?

Reminds me of Gladiator Days.

You don't think it's a little bit more of a pussy-fied way to do it, though?

Like, rather than sitting right on the back of a thousand-pound beast?

Whipping his ass, telling him to get going.

You know, you're just sitting in a sidecar like robbing.

So what happened to Christopher Reed whipping ass?

Stay off the horses.

Dangerous, man.

Nah, they're docile creatures.

Are they?

Yeah, they do seem pretty nice, most horses, you know.

Until they get a kick in the head.

So that's what happens.

Horses are constantly trying to commit suicide.

What?

Yeah, horses are just constantly trying to commit suicide.

They're just always trying to find ways to kill themselves.

In what way?

What do you mean?

In the stupidest way possible.

They're just like careless, you mean?

Yeah, they're just stupid.

They're not like jumping off cliffs or anything like that.

If they would, they could.

Self-harming horse.

I've seen them run straight into a fence that they've avoided

a million times and just run straight into a

wooden fence and then they get stuck with a piece of wood and then you've got to get the vet out there.

It's just insane.

Insanity.

Maybe you're just raising stupid horses.

No, no.

Could be.

Well, look, we saw him fall out of the back seat of your car.

I have, speaking of suicide, get them.

Yes.

I have a suicide of the week.

Okay.

The last one was, if you remember, Walt, it it was Sarco, the sarcophagus out in the woods, killing yourself.

This is an experienced skydiver with over 400 jumps, appears to have leapt to her death on purpose.

Do you ever do any skydiving Sunday?

No.

He wants to, though.

You said you would.

I would have done it.

I would have done it.

So you think you're too old now?

You think you're past that cutoff date?

Nah, I don't think I'm too old.

There's a place right around the world.

You said you would have done it, but as if you're like, you know what, that time has passed.

I got kids now.

I need to be around, you know?

I remember for the life insurance policy, they asked you questions like that.

Do you skydive?

It's like all risky shit.

So I guess, you know,

worry about your policy.

Did you lie or did you tell them that you're a fucked up man?

You told them I'm a weekend wig maniac.

You told them I'm a stuntman.

Did you tell them that you eat raw figs?

I do a podcast.

That's even worse.

They canceled me.

You know, I.

You know, speaking of that, this is, if you like this episode of Tom, Steve, Dave,

this is basically the all-new Sunday Jeff show, Just Minus Tom, who was here last week.

And I think people will be okay with that.

100% less Tom.

Had a girl last week.

Tom had a midlife crisis.

He came in and he got his ball snipped, so I mean, he's actually going to have some kind of crisis.

Do you think that I didn't factor that into his, maybe that's why he is so melancholy and blue?

Do you think he feels like he backed down and

made his wife happy by getting his nut snipped?

And there's a little bit of

resentment now?

Yeah, there's a little bit of a tent.

Was it his idea?

I'm very clear on the story, even though he's told it a hundred times that the wife was the one who suggested, like, go ahead and get it done.

Yeah.

Okay.

I think so.

Could be wrong, though.

I'm sure right now he's gritting his teeth going like this.

No, my wife didn't make me.

It was all my idea.

But does it?

Does it lower testosterone or anything like that?

I don't think so.

I think it's

supposedly a lot easier for a male than it is a female to get it done.

That's what they used to do back in the day.

They had the kids keep their voices higher when they were like choir singers, just cut the nuts right off.

Castratos?

Yeah, castratos.

Have you seen changes in Tom since he's had it done?

Does he sing in a high voice?

Falsetto.

Yeah, but this is basically an all-new Sunday Jeff show.

It really is, yeah.

Led by Sunday.

Usually we've got some Sunday funnies.

Sunday will tell some jokes.

Don't have any funnies at the ready, though.

No?

You should have some always at the ready.

You should have some in your wallet in case of emergency.

Yeah, like a

party or something.

Like, you know, that card that the subcommanders have to crack open to launch nickel missiles?

Yeah, I forgot the key to open the box.

Yeah, in your wallet, should always be a little in there.

You're ready for some Tesla funnies?

But anyway, so this is an experienced skydiver who fell to her death in what appears to be a deliberate action to end her own life,

according to the company that took her up.

Yeah, because I didn't want to get sued.

Right, that's what they're going to say.

She was married, 32, had more than 400 successful jumps, was killed instantly when she crashed into a farmer's field.

It's not being treated as suspicious because they think that, you know, like I said, it was a deliberate act.

She was mad for the sport, the unidentified friend said.

And just two days before she died, she did 11 jumps.

That's a lot of jumps.

That's a lot.

She must have done about 80 this year, he said.

Okay, so

11 jumps in one day.

How long does it take to get up there and then come down again?

Probably.

It's got to be a certain altitude to fly.

I mean, you get up there, then you come down.

You've got to repo if you have another parachute or you repack the one you have.

Because you've got to get a new parachute or do something every time you go up.

Over course of eight hours, I bet you you could do 11.

A lot of jumps, though.

11 hours.

I mean, 11 jumps is a lot.

I've been thinking about

being

because there's a Skydive company in Alaire,

and I would hear the planes go up.

They go on the weekends, and they seem to go up about every half hour.

It says here between 10,000 to 14,000 feet is about how high they get you up to skydive.

It looks high.

Yeah, it was when you watched skydiving.

It's pretty high.

Every once in a while, I would set up my little monocular, and I'd follow the plane up, and then watch the people actually jump out.

It's really weird.

Does she have problems with this?

Did you see this little dot?

Doesn't say.

It doesn't say about any problems.

It's not being treated as suspicious, and her file will now be prepared for the coroner.

So, how do you know it was a malfunction?

Like, how would they ever tell if

falling from that altitude?

Unless she left a suicide note, how do they know it was suicide?

Or maybe she left her parachute.

Well, either that, or I guess I wouldn't even let her out of the plane if I'd just go enough that the pilot would be just like, what are you doing?

Because if there was a malfunction, she would have had to pull both chutes

mainly in reserve.

Plus, there usually is an

altitude, like emergency backup in case case you pass out.

She's pretty.

Good-looking girl.

So

she had deactivated that, the backup, and none of the

things were pulled.

It would more than likely either be she committed suicide or she passed out.

She's falling from that distance.

I mean, what's left?

Like, what would you find?

Oh, you'd still be, there'd be something.

She landed in a field.

It was soft.

Yeah, she bounced off the ground, no doubt.

Did you see that guy fall out of the stadium yesterday?

No.

In Pittsburgh?

Yeah, he fell from the second level or something.

Oh, it was fucking 30 feet.

Baseball game?

And it's like it's on camera.

You see the base hit bounce in front of the center fielder.

It looks like a dummy fall.

And then all of a sudden, you just see this guy's body fall and hit the field.

And I don't know what happened to him, but it did not look good.

It looked like it landed on his head.

I mean, you've been in, somebody's stadium's got a real, especially in the upper seats.

It's got a real, the pitch is really far.

I mean, it looks almost like if you trip, you're going over that glass.

They shouldn't be able to get over that banister, though.

There's no way an adult body should fall over that banister.

Well, even at the Prudential Center, where we were there sat up top the one time, they had the glass, but I'm saying the pitch is pretty high.

I mean, you just trip or whatever.

If that glass isn't there, you're going over, man.

We know that now that all stadiums are going to have to do something now to ensure that nobody can get fall over those.

Be glass all the way to the roof.

Yeah, I mean, here it is.

Yeah, 20 feet.

That says.

Oh, wait, I didn't see him fall.

Can you play that again, get him?

I'm trying.

It's this Fox News.

It's so fucked up.

Yeah, it's a good thing.

Was this a purposeful

purposeful?

It looks like he jumps, to be honest with you.

Like he wants to get on the field?

He's like, it's not that far.

He's drunk.

That's entirely possible.

All right.

So

here he is.

Oh, there he goes.

He definitely got up on top.

You can see he was getting on top of the rail.

Yeah, that's rough.

I saw that at a Devil's Game once.

A guy fell over the concourse and landed on people below him.

I don't know what happened to those people, but we were there and they didn't even stop the game.

This, they stopped the game.

This was in 1990,

1990.

He's on the field.

They have to stay.

True.

Yeah.

He's definitely hanging there.

I mean, it's just like nobody stops him either.

It's like, it's weird.

Has he.

It looks like he's leaning backwards.

Has he been pronounced dead, get him, or is he injured?

Critically injured?

Oh, boy.

You go to to a game and you never think that's going to happen.

Break your neck or something.

That's all over.

Yeah, that's right.

You go and you get hit with a puck or something, like the statistically the chances of that, like a puck hitting you in the face.

Well, now it has to

kill that girl.

It killed a tiny 10-year-old girl.

That's why there is nets all over the NHL now.

But for decades, there was no nets.

You're like, you pay attention or you could get hit.

Isn't it weird how it takes something tragic to make people

move their asses?

And as opposed to somebody being like

proactive and saying, you know what, there's a puck flying around at hundreds of miles an hour.

It could go off the ice and hit somebody.

We should put some mess up.

It's changed.

How many years, though, it never happened, though?

Like, how many years

the players are bigger?

All the equipment, everything, the sticks are different.

Yeah, it just flies off this.

I mean, composites sticks are insane what they can make that puck travel at now.

Remember, they had coalies without no masks.

There was only one guy that could shoot 100 miles per hour back in the like in the 80s and 90s.

It was like Ally Afrady.

McGinnis.

And yeah, McGinnis.

That was it.

And now

every fucking guy can now shoot at 100 miles an hour because of those sticks.

It's crazy.

I remember I was watching a video on foul balls and how dangerous foul balls are in baseball.

They set up a plexiglass shield and fired a ball.

And Brian Gumble or Dan Gumble, one of the gumbles, is talking to the people.

And even if they're fully paying attention, sometimes they didn't even get it, were able to get a glove up or their hand up in front of their face.

And it's just it's just it's crazy.

Like, you know, how fast.

They've kind of eliminated that, eliminated that now, though, with

does baseball do it too?

Is there some kind of they have netting up and behind now in a lot of areas?

Yeah, not every area, though.

Yeah, like when I think when this video was made, like, they it was very rare.

It was always behind home plate.

I mean, as far as I remember, I just didn't know if they do it down the

down third and first base, if they have nets now.

Sunday, Jeff.

I was wondering about you because I know you're into airplanes, that kind of thing.

Are you also into rocketry?

Are you following this?

Space rockets?

Yeah, like this Blue Origin thing.

Were you following this?

No.

No, you didn't care.

No.

Wow.

I don't even, do we even have a space program anymore?

Yeah, we have a whole bunch of rockets.

I don't think NASA is a business.

Is NASA actually doing it?

We have manned people that are actually, like, it seems like they gave up after the space shuttle program.

Well, I mean, when you've got billionaires,

you know, doing it better.

Are they?

Well, I mean, they haven't lost any astronauts yet, have they?

NASA can't say the same.

Can NASA say that they haven't lost anybody?

Yeah, but I'm saying, how many times have they gone up?

I mean, they've had a lot of success.

Look, there's going to be failures.

Just recently.

There's going to be failures.

Everything's got a trial.

Every person on the ISS has been up there, but put them has been put up there by private.

I don't know.

Just recently, those two astronauts were stuck in space for how long?

Was it like six months or something?

I think nine months.

And I heard that it did shit to their body, too.

They may not revert back to their normal state.

They wanted a wheelchair.

They were gaining at their heads and shit.

Yeah, that's what people are saying.

Like the ladies, the lady's face looks so different when she got out of that

rocket or whatever.

Living in, what's it called?

An orbit?

Is that called?

Or when you're in free, no, what's it called?

Zero gravity.

Zero gravity for that long, it changed your cranium.

Maybe that's why those aliens look like that.

Could be onto something, y'all.

Yeah.

Could be on to something.

If you're married to one of the ladies that goes up in the space and she can't get back down,

can you overlook the fact that now her head is now elongated

and looks like

basically it looks, you know,

looks like a skateboard.

It does.

It does go back to normal.

It's like a banana with like two two-arms on the side.

Can you overlook that?

Or are you just kind of like, you got to wear a hat on your head?

Yeah, sure, we could overlook that.

We got to get you a new hat.

Yeah, just like

the hat only covers, just like it's a small little, it's like those little hats that you got ice cream for when you were a kid.

The tiniest hat on your head.

Yeah, it says right here, they were stranded in space for nearly nine months after their initial eight-day mission.

Whoa, nine months?

They couldn't get to him?

Months they couldn't get to him.

And then finally,

a private company, SpaceX, did it.

They went and got them.

And which one is SpaceX?

Is that Musk?

Or which is the one that Bezos has?

Blue Origin?

Blue Argent.

Yeah.

What does that mean?

Argent?

Origin.

Oh, Origin.

Yeah, sorry.

Yeah, it was a Boeing craft they went up in, but they weren't sure of its safety.

But it did actually land safely.

Can you imagine having that much money that

your pissing contests are between billionaires are like, well, I got out to space farther than you did.

I mean, that's what it's come down to.

There's no way to measure their dicks on Earth.

They got to do it out in space now.

Do you not remember during the 90s when all the billionaires were going up on balloons?

Yes.

And they were like, you're trying to get around the world faster than the other ones were?

Nothing left excites them, I guess.

Yeah.

I mean, they're literally having to take it off planet to show how big their dicks are.

Stupid.

All that money that they're spending on that.

Scary how much money could be spent so much in better ways.

Now?

You're sounding like everybody else.

That's been because I was wrong.

I was wrong about this Blue Origin or this lady's flight.

Why?

Everybody's against it.

I was talking initially, I think not last week, but the week before, about how there were a couple celebrity women who were like, you know, it's like you said, it's a waste of resources.

It's a waste of time.

You're going for a ride.

And then it really, like, it blew up and people went after Katy Perry, like Burger King.

Or Wendy's, rather.

I'm sorry.

Wendy's.

Wendy's.

Wendy's.

Like, they were like, somebody posted like, Katy Perry's back from space.

And Wendy's Wendy's posted like send her back.

Whoa.

But she took it as if they called her a cunt or something.

Her sources were like, it's inappropriate and it's wrong and it's mean, it's bullying, blah, blah, blah, all this other shit.

I was like, oh, my fucking God.

Well, I heard that, you know,

after we said, you know, why are people upset about it?

You know, I saw

some people correct us on why

we were wrong.

To not be upset?

Not to be be upset.

Okay.

Was that one of the things that Katie Curry did, which I was like, oh, I didn't know that, was like she used the opportunity to talk about her new album that was dropping.

Her tour dates, yeah.

She held up a piece.

You couldn't even read it.

Oh, she did this in space?

She did it while she was in space.

She spent so much time looking at the camera in space.

She's holding up a daisy.

She's holding up her tour dates.

Like all this shit.

It's like,

it's nuts.

You're only up there for 11 minutes.

Man, I would love to go up there for 11 minutes.

Would you?

Sure.

You wouldn't be scared?

No, well, this is the.

Who is this, the Amazon one?

This is the Amazon one.

Well, his just

barely gets into the crest of space, right?

It's not really like going deep into space.

I still would love to do it.

I would still love to do it.

I want to see somebody get beyond the Van Allen belts.

Then let's see how big your dick is.

Okay?

Let's see you get past those belts, you two fucking douchebags.

You do hyperspace.

Yeah, send somebody through a Van Allen belt and get them back.

And then I'll say, Yeah, you got a big dick.

We've been through it.

Don't get

it out.

I know what you're doing.

You're just sending people up into the fucking safest part,

barely space,

and saying, you know, and then puffing your chest out and being like, go, look at me.

Look what I can do.

How big my dick is.

Yeah, but you, but I want to see you get past those belts.

Because nobody really got past those belts.

Ever been back to the moon?

I see this as like one of one of those

millionaires or billionaires goes out and like shoots an elephant somewhere.

And it's like the elephant that they actually need to kill, like for the rest of the herd.

And they get that prize shot of them.

It does.

It happens a lot.

Does it?

Yeah.

Billionaires killing elephants that need to be killed?

Yeah, like there's in the herd, in the herd, there'll be like an elephant that's too old.

Okay.

And so they...

They pay the conservation place a lot of money.

They go out and shoot it.

And then they end up using that money to reinvest in conservation efforts.

You're about 10 years out from billionaires.

That's what elephants.

You You know any billionaires?

You still have that elephant.

Who is the most dangerous animal?

You have that elephant in a surrounded hat.

It could be standing on his chest with your foot with the gun in there.

I did the herd a favor.

CSD presents a canned hunt with Giddam.

Documentary.

Yeah, they were also criticizing the way,

I guess, like, I don't know if it was AI.

It looked real to me.

But when their capsule finally, like, hit the ground, which was weird because, like, when you see the way Musk's rocket picked those people up and then brought them back, it's like it, like,

backs down, lowers down until it gets to like this stage where it clamps on.

Yeah.

Where these guys, these girls came down in one of those pods with a fucking, uh, with a parachute.

Old school.

And I guess what happened was they were supposed to wait.

So Bezos, because he had this special wrench.

Yeah.

This is if Bezos has ever used a fucking wrench in the last 30 years, right?

When has that motherfucker ever had to ever use a wrench when he has a thousand people with wrenches?

With wrenches ready, at the ready, but he's got to have the photo up.

Gibbon, can you possibly find it?

Please.

Can you see him fall?

Yeah, yes, I saw that.

Can I please put a caveat out there, though?

All this bashing.

Okay.

If the wind changes in between this drops and the tide changes, and now they're for Katy Perry and all this shit, Just give us a week.

Don't bash us.

Because next week,

we'll do the flip-flop and make sure that we're back the other way.

I just, I couldn't believe it.

Like, in this world we live in, where it's all like, girl bosses, yeah.

And then a bunch of girls go up there, but then it's like, no, you're a bunch of rich bitches that have privilege.

Like, because they are saying, like, they were saying, like, hey, you know what?

This just goes to show, you know, as a female, you can do it too.

It's like, yeah, if you're friends with fucking Jeff Bezos or

remember when William Shannon went up, he was like, he did right there.

Jeff Wall was almost as good as mine in your backyard, Walton.

He's going around to the side to,

and then he falls down.

That was Bezos who fell.

That was Bezos who fell.

Oh, fuck it.

And he had his special wrench that he was supposed to open the capsule with, but Katy Perry opened it from the inside so you can see the door open a little bit and then close again, and then he uses a special wrench.

Yeah, it deserves every bit of fucking

ridicule that it got on the internet.

That's when the internet was.

Yeah, we were wrong totally wrong

i hadn't done really a lot of work um

investigating on it though before we talked about it i didn't see the uh you're wasting resources coming because i guess katy perry was a whole whole big like climate change person two years ago and now she's flying around in space with her buddies

even if you just funneled that money that you wasted on that trip into research for a disease

it would be money better spent i think you might cure the disease depending on what it is you might but even if you don't cure the disease, I still think it's money better spent than flying around.

Enjoy a ride into space.

Because that's what they were, they were like, I mean, at one point, they were said that Katie,

one of the reporters says to Katie Perry, she said, congratulations on being an astronaut.

And she's like, thank you very much.

It's like, you guys aren't astronauts.

Like,

the steps you have to go through to become an astronaut is a lot more than knowing Lauren Sanchez.

Yeah, somebody I saw online, somebody was real snarky, snarkier than I am, was like, oh, well, if Katie Perry's an astronaut, then I'm a deep sea diver because I just stepped in a puddle.

Very snarky.

This was directed at you?

Not at me.

I saw it at the time.

I had enough of somebody writing it to the sky.

Directed at her.

I'm not that snarky.

I can't go online and be that fucking.

Yeah, I can't write jokes.

So it's just a joyride.

Basically, it's just a joyride.

What do you think it does to the

like if it changes your skull, do you think it affects other things in your body?

I mean, look at the outfits you wear.

It's nothing really, especially just a jumpsuit.

That's not what they wear when they go.

They're in special outfits when they go.

Do you think it affects

their time of the month and everything?

Do you think they still get their cycle?

It's like floating around up there.

Do you think it does any of that shit?

I don't know.

For the amount of time that you're in space, what are they only in there for like a minute or two, right?

Could you conceive in space?

You think

Moonraker did it.

Remember,

he got busy in space.

Sure thing.

Did I conceive?

Just like a moon.

Top 007.

Can the British end up, sir?

Do you think you can, though?

Do you think?

So what would you dream when you got home?

Like, what would the baby be, though?

I guess it has to be.

It wouldn't matter, right?

Where he conceived, it doesn't matter.

It's where you're born, right?

I mean, it depends how

you were stuck in space, though, for nine months.

That kid's coming out with one of them banana heads.

And what happens if it does?

Like, what nationality is it?

That's a good point.

Right?

Is it the first space baby?

Wherever it lands?

Oh, that's good, too, wherever it lands.

I would think it would be the first, it would have no country of origin.

Right.

Which would be very unique.

Like how when some people are born, they're like, I'm genderless.

They just have like an X on their birth certificate.

Where were you born?

In space.

Man, Allen Belts.

That's where I was born.

Yeah, this looks like Charlie's Angels, like the stunt women from Charlie's Angels, those figures.

It doesn't look real though I'm sitting on those boxes either.

Like, it looks photoshopped.

The same boxes you guys stood on in comic book, man.

Yeah, right?

Those Apple boxes.

Do you think you have to be

a certain body type to go out in space?

Because they all have the same body.

William Shaw women are all slim.

Yeah, William Shawden.

But I'm saying, at least he was like kind of.

He's a little rotund, right?

Yeah, but I say, at least when he got back, he was just like amazed.

He was like, you know, he was like kind of

blowing away.

I'll be appearing at the Pensacola.

He was not put up at the time.

Pensacola fucking comic book convention.

No.

I'll be at Star Trek Con.

There he is.

I'll be in a booth by Ming Chen.

I mean, he must have been at least, I think he's almost 90, or he might be older 90.

But he had to be in his 80s when he did this.

Yeah.

Pretty impressive.

I think Strahan did it, too.

Didn't Strahan go up?

Michael Strahan.

Yeah.

Well, that was he did that flight just before he

met with Chuck, who gave us COVID.

So that's why I think we had space COVID.

Why?

And why are you on mic this episode?

Because last week you weren't on mic, you chose not to have a mic, and now this episode,

maybe because he made sure you had a mic.

Maybe because he thinks it's on our all-new Sunday Jeff show.

This is still TS Day.

Cut that shit off.

Making COVID jokes fucking four years later.

Thank you, get him.

Talking about herds.

The facts that people want to know.

Damn, I lost it.

Oh, no, here I'm looking for.

Speaking of Ming Chen, he has a new business.

He also has, I want to wait till Q's here.

He also has some new stand-up that we have to go over.

So So

probably next week.

Yeah,

he did stand-up in New Mexico, and then he did it again in Alaska just recently, like within the past couple of weeks.

You have audio of it?

I have audio of the second one.

I'm still waiting for the second one.

How long is this?

I don't know.

Let me see.

Better than Sunday funny?

No.

No, it's not.

Yeah, if I had to guess, I'd say no, probably not.

That's funny just looking at him.

I'm actually on a comic book man one day.

Let's see.

Here I go to somewhere.

Okay.

It is

five minutes and 25 seconds long.

So he did five minutes.

All right.

Yeah, that's that's I would like to listen to that and

break it down on an episode of Tell Him Steve Dave.

I'll give him props.

If it's funny, it's funny.

I don't care.

I'll admit it.

Absolutely.

So he has a new business.

If you want to promote your business, I guess if he's at a con, it's called 10 Minutes with Ming.

And it's not what you think, Sunday Jeff.

He goes up in SpaceX

and shows a card with all your information on it.

It's a unique opportunity to take the main stage with Ming Chen at Northern Fan Con 2025.

So I guess, like, you know, where they normally do the,

what was it called?

Moderated panels and stuff.

Ming will take you up and with your business for $125, this is what you get.

10-minute recorded segment with Ming on the FanCon maiden stage.

Featured on Ming's channel, FanCon's channel, and your own copy of the full episode, plus your individual segment to share wherever you like.

Whether you're launching something new or just waiting to get out your story,

this is a high-energy, high-visibility moment you won't want to miss.

And with video content getting more engagement and conversation

than ever, it's the smart way to stand out.

Spots are extremely limited.

I'm curious to see how well he did.

Limited, huh?

I really doubt they're highly limited.

Limited to how many cards you know.

Don't forget to mention that 10 Minutes with Think is sponsored by Dan Gowen of Century 21 Energy Realty.

Now,

did he ask you to promote this?

No.

No, okay.

No, I just happened to see it on his Instagram.

Yeah, there he is.

He might make more 10 Minutes the Other Way.

He might.

He probably would.

More than $125, I'm sure.

He would just sacrifice his dignity and honor.

What's it called?

A bag of peanuts?

It must be a local snack to wherever he is.

It's like, who is this guy?

Why is he holding a bag of peanuts?

This guy used to be a Maverick.

That fucking award, that trophy should be fucking resistant.

Descented, huh?

Just like, who was that?

Who was that in the 80s that Miss America?

Teeth Throat?

The Miss America who got her crown taken away?

Vanessa Williams.

Vanessa Williams.

Vanessa Williams, Ming, right now,

or that fucking board who awarded him the Maverick has no credibility in giving out trophies anymore.

So they should

convene an emergency meeting, and you're going to present this evidence to them.

And it's at the opening, it's a picture of Ming eating some kind of snack with, I guess,

20th century first.

Don Gowan, yeah.

Don Gowan's behind him.

Get this legend.

Don Gowan.

He's from Century 21 Energy Realty.

I think he.

Come on.

I think he might be in this with Ming somehow.

Like he's promoting him or something.

He's sponsoring it.

Oh, yeah, there you go.

Sponsored by Duh.

Get this legend to rep your business, podcast, or product for $125 at Northern FanCon.

So I guess he's going to see how it goes at Northern FanCon, and then from there, he'll make his decision as to whether he goes to the business.

It was either this guy or that sleazy lawyer that's on every bus stop bench.

Right, yeah.

I still don't understand the snack pack in the photo, though.

I don't get it either.

It was the only photo Ming had available.

I think Don's getting $125, and Ming's just getting the snack pack.

Ming's getting the snacks.

Old Don just hoodwinked fucking Ming.

I'll pay you in snacks.

Yeah, I think.

Who's this again?

Who's this guy holding this bag of peanuts or whatever?

Is it peanuts?

What is it?

A cheese fries, it says.

The bag's as big as he.

No, cheeseies.

Cheeseies?

Hawkins cheesies.

Dude, you're not kidding.

The bag goes from his waist up to above his face.

You know, that's going to be like you go to his studio, he's going to have a whole fucking corner full of those bags there.

Is this the product of, you know, it took a while, but is this the fallout of the breakup of ISO Comics and the shared games?

How long has comic book members lived here?

Oh, a long time.

Who is this guy?

Yeah, this is concerning.

This is not concerning like Bill Belichick concerning, but it's still concerning.

This guy's got his eyes like, dad, who is this guy?

He's a celebrity.

He was on a TV show.

Wait, is there a logo with Ming in there?

Oh, no, that's the fan con logo, right?

The two man.

I thought that was one of those was Ming.

Yes, let's say it is.

We got to get Dan Gowen on the line.

Can you call Dan?

I'm going to call Dan Cowen right now while we're podcasting.

You got an ad you could do?

I want to call him Dan?

Yeah, sure.

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And that is it.

He went straight to voicemails.

Oh, no, really?

Ming, Ming, was Ming the voicemail?

Right.

Just Ming.

I'll do this for another $100.

Another $125.

Now I do

the answering machines, too.

Have you seen that story that blew up on the internet this week?

What story is that?

Oh, it's kind of the hypothetical question.

The 100 gorillas?

Yeah.

Dude, it's everywhere.

I wrote it down.

I was like, I promise we won't talk about 100 gorillas versus one guy.

It sounds like something that would have come up, though, and Tom C.

Dego for like years ago.

Have you heard about this?

They take the internet by storm.

Somebody just pondered, could one

silverback gorilla take on 100 men and win?

No weapons?

Just regular.

Yeah, it's just hand-to-hand combat.

Fuck them up.

Who?

The gorilla.

100 men.

Well, it depends on who the 100 men are.

I mean, just, I mean, if you try to storm the gorilla and try to just get on top of it.

That's really the only way you could do it.

It's just, I mean, but by the time he's going to rip you apart, man, he's got jaws, too, though.

No, but I'm just saying, do you know how strong a fucking gorilla is?

I know, but they said it could lift a car.

4,000 pounds.

4,000 pounds, it is.

But if you had.

4,000 pounds.

So how many say each you lift a car up?

Right, exactly.

Wait a minute, though.

You haven't heard of my 100 men yet.

Ian McGregor.

Oh, but now you're picking.

Ken Shamrock.

What decade is this?

Andre the Giant.

Who's dead?

Hulk Hogan.

Who's 71?

Bob Backlund.

Anybody who is our champion in WWF, like anybody who ever held the belt once.

I think they did this in King Kong.

That's a lot of mistake.

What the guy in Tony Wars just pops the band off his arm is like, what a man, and then he gets destroyed.

He's just toying with him.

Steve Austin,

not the Bionic Man, but the wrestler.

But if you just took all the greatest MMA fighters,

don't you think you would have a pretty good shot at winning though?

Honestly, I don't think there's anybody crazy enough to even do it.

No, of course not.

But that's right off the bat.

That tells you your answer.

Well,

if it was done, like, it had to be done.

It just had to be done.

It just for whatever reason, it just.

Aliens come down and this decides the fate of the Earth.

For whatever reason, you have to give up and say it's happening.

What are you going to do to the gorilla, though?

I'm saying, like, what would you do?

a hundred people is a lot of people

you would have to somehow like i said if you're you're able to get him down or whatever and then you're gonna who's gonna get their arm around him choke him or do him or

have you ever been in a zoo they they will lose about

40 to 50 men i think some in the process but i do think that 100 men just a sheer number of men could probably suffocate him and hold him down with that all he's got to do is do that.

Right off the bat, that's the turn enough to not be like, I'm out, bro.

I'm talented around.

Billy's force is one of the strongest plates.

While you're trying to get him, he's got half your arm in his mouth.

But also, the problem is for the men is you have to get close enough to him in massive numbers to the pile on.

It has to be

immense.

You have to have like 60 guys on just a big fucking

massive humanity.

See, I think what you got to do, though, no, Sunday, you're up front.

I'll tell you why.

Because they're going to take all like they're going to take like 20 people, 30 people who can't really fight that well.

They're not like your Shamrocks and Andre the Giants.

If they're MMA fighters, they can fight.

You're going to put them up.

Okay, even if you put your weakest MMA fighters up, they're not going to fight.

There are no weapons.

What's that?

There are no weak MMA fighters.

Well, I mean, compared to like the

Shamrocks and the other guys, you know, like the true champions.

Yeah.

Like Leland from Dog.

You're going to want to put your weakest guys up front so that

you'll get some collateral damage.

You're going to get some guys killed, but they can at least jump on

the gorilla and try to pin them to the ground with their sheer weight, you know?

You got Mike Tyson?

Do you have anything?

You've got fucking Mike Tyson.

Do you think a punch from any person on earth is going to do anything to him?

He's just going to be like, what do you do?

It's going to be just like, what are you doing?

Yeah, exactly.

It's going to be like, he's going to.

Have you ever been to the zoo?

Have you ever seen him?

Of course, I've been to more zoos than you've been to.

Okay, well, then you should know better.

The question is: have you been to more zoos than I have?

It doesn't matter how many zoos I have.

I've seen a gorilla.

It doesn't matter if you're bringing it up, it matters.

I've seen a gorilla, and I've seen the size of the freaking head of a gorilla.

I've seen a gorilla too, and I've also seen Ken Shamrock.

And if you have a hundred of him, like men like him, Tyson, Hulk Hogan,

you're talking not now, Jimmy the Superfly Snooker,

Gorilla monsoon.

I'm telling you, you get the biggest and baddest fucking boys

that are available.

Let's say in this imaginary

scenario, they're all alive and in their prime.

I still think 100 is a lot of people.

It can't only bite one person at a time.

It's true.

It is true.

It doesn't mean he's going to be biting.

Like the first guy.

You got to catch him first.

You have to be insane to be one of the first to to go in and be like, let's get him guys.

All he's got to do is

just start grabbing them.

I think it's.

As soon as he rips one person's head off, the other ones aren't even going to try to attack him.

Right, like somebody's arm goes flying by.

It has to be done.

And I also wonder, like, would they make them fight nude?

Oh, so he couldn't grab them.

Like a gorilla, because that would be a big disadvantage.

I know you're supposed to have no weapons.

You're supposed to be just like the gorilla, but you know, a gorilla goes for the the fucking genitals all the time.

Rips them right up.

So, I mean, I would at least let the men fight clothed.

Would you know how fast that sucker's going?

There's no way.

You're talking about.

You don't realize how many bodies 100 bodies is, though, to get through.

You said 4,000 pounds.

They can lift.

How many people?

So even if those people weigh 100 people and they're 200 pounds apiece, that's 2,000.

2,000 pounds.

Evander Holyfield got his ear bit off.

He still beat fucking Tyson's ass.

He wasn't a gorilla.

It doesn't matter.

Somebody's going to die.

But with that amount of humanity,

all with the singular purpose

of just subduing this creature,

someone can get on all fours and always bested beast.

Because.

of smarts, because of doing, you know, creating weapons that can't use weapons, though.

Well, that's, you know.

That's the thing.

That's the kicker, isn't it?

But with that much, like, how many pounds do you think 100 dudes of that caliber weigh?

If each person weighs 250 at least?

Yeah, so you're talking 25,000.

Some weigh 300?

Right.

He just said it could lift 4,000 pounds.

Oh, he's up to 10, so it'll be 25,000.

Yeah.

That is a massive amount of weight that this gorilla will have to get off of it.

I'm not saying that it's going to be pretty.

It's going to be fucking ugly.

It's going to be brutal.

It's going to be grisly.

It's going to be

NC 17 content for sure.

You think?

But I still put my money on man.

I don't know.

That many?

We're watching a goose chase a gorilla away.

He's been sissy five.

Yeah.

And it's a silverback, they said, too.

But let's say it's an average silverback.

It's not the biggest silverback.

It's like midlife, not fully grown.

It's not an old silverback, but it's also not one of the

big dog of the silver.

Is there a poll?

What's the most people think

the gorilla is going to win?

The gorilla is going to win.

It's pretty.

I mean, 100 people, though, is a lot, though.

Yeah, it is.

But you're right.

There would be a lot.

I mean, for that to happen, there'd have to be a lot of sacrifices.

Yeah.

Now, what do you do, though?

What's your move?

Like what's your move?

Like what do you do to

you've got to cut oxygen to the brain.

I'm saying most people probably are not going to get their hands around his neck.

Why not?

Why not?

You don't think that Andre the Giant could get his arms around?

Look what he just did to that poor thing.

That's what he'd be doing to us.

But don't you think Andre the Giant could get his massive arms around that neck?

He's pretty big.

Andre the Giant's pretty big.

You've got to make sure you see like Andre's got to go last to get his.

This is like taking on Thanos.

So he's that that's your that's your Trojan horse

Andre's got to be number 100 So when a 99 are able to wrestle that gorilla down, he's got to get his arm around the gorilla We can already hold him for so long go get him and squeeze until that gorilla can breathe and then and subdue it into unconsciousness Take a look

a problem with this

Just to prove a point

it's for the herd

But I think you discount ugly ugly, if you just throw in just average Joes, that gorilla is not even going to take five minutes to take on 100 average Joes.

But if you throw our biggest and baddest asses

at the gorilla, I think our baddest asses would still win.

I don't know.

Brains, they have a little bit of strategy.

Like a punch from one of those guys.

Well, gorillas don't punch, though.

But I'm just...

I don't know.

They just look like they're punching each other.

Just one SWAT from that.

It's got to be just like your head's going to come off your body.

Yeah, I guess.

God forbid he goes a hold of you.

Yeah, it's over.

Like I said, there's going to be mass casualties.

But he can't beat all of them.

That's just numbers is just, it just

looks an if army ants can take down a gorilla, you know they can, right?

Yeah, with guns.

No.

No, I'm talking about insects.

That's why a gorilla runs from a fucking

ants?

Every animal runs.

Because the sheer numbers, they can't beat those little ants.

The sheer numbers of human beings, it works just like those ants.

I never heard of ants running away from.

You've never seen that.

Get them, am I right?

Fire ants, maybe.

Sorry, my microphone's not working.

Right, you know that any creature is going to fall down.

No, you said ants.

You didn't say any creature.

Any creature, yeah, even an elephant.

with enough ants covering it is going to is going to fall down and die.

Well, it's because they're being envenomated.

Yeah.

So, but that's a that's technically a weapon.

Yeah, they're being poisoned.

Yeah.

They're being bit.

But by the tiniest creatures on the planet, though.

Could you bite the gorilla?

Sheer numbers is why.

Yeah, you could use your teeth.

You can use your teeth.

I'm not sure you get to that fur.

Yeah, that's true.

You probably get a mouthful of fucking insects or something.

Yeah.

All dirty shit and everything fights and crap.

I,

you know, I'd like to think, think, though, that

man comes victorious.

Man would triumph

in the sheer face.

I mean, look,

it's a bloodbath.

No Tom Brady can.

It is a blood blackbathbath.

No, Tom Brady is a fighter.

He's an athlete.

Okay, if I'm going to pick any football player, Ray Lewis.

He's got a fucking machete.

Brian Erlacher.

All linebackers.

Lawrence Taylor.

L.T.

Come on.

He broke Joe Theisman's leg like it was a fucking dry twig.

Joe Theisman ain't no gorilla.

Gorilla's bones ain't no like.

It's more like an oak tree that.

Bill Belichick's the coach.

All right, boys.

Treats me there.

You got Mickey from Rocky as the come-in?

There's no fictional characters.

No fictional characters.

No actors.

No actors like

Sly Stallone.

Okay, yeah, he looks.

you know, the part, but he's not really a fighter, though.

It has to be real dealership.

Yes.

Chuck Norris, yes.

Bruce Lee, I would take him as one of my 100.

Who else can you think of that

is a devastating fighter?

Mr.

T.

No, that's an actor.

He was a bodyguard.

He is a bodyguard for a while.

He's a bodyguard.

Yeah, it's not a not a fighter, a bodyguard.

Club and Lang.

But again,

no Hollywood characters, Sunday.

Rocky Mushroom.

Treat this with the fucking dignity it deserves.

What are you talking about, wrestlers?

I mean, those wrestlers are...

You're talking about MMA guys?

Careful.

Do you call wrestling fake now?

That's really fine.

You're saying like people that are trained to fight, you know?

Okay, I'd get it like somebody who's in special forces, Navy SEAL, Jack Reacher.

But they all

Hollywood character 148.

Okay,

but those Navy SEALs are trained

on these knives.

Yes, there are some hand-to-hand combat, but

I don't know if they have the physique that's needed, though.

You need big,

strong,

thick

men.

Sumo wrestlers.

I would take a sumo wrestler.

Yeah, you could probably get a bunch of sumo wrestlers.

It would be way harder to not be.

It'd be a different story.

Got a hundred sumo wrestlers?

No, now you're coming around.

You're talking about a lot of beef at the table, bro.

Just look how big his ass is that drilling.

It's crazy.

See how fast they move, though?

It's crazy for such a big creature.

They're so agile.

Yeah, but it's crazy.

I still think you just

100 people is a staggering amount of people.

You got to distract them.

You get one of those big things.

I think he's going to be distracted when he's fucking sinking his big teeth into someone's head.

When people are charging at him, yeah, I think that's enough distraction.

So he stands on his back legs and starts beating his chest.

Like King Kong?

Yeah,

I think a lot of those, they'll be running the other way.

I'm out, bro.

I'm not even going to attempt it.

No, I think they're committed.

Everyone's 100% committed to the

What does the battlefield look like?

Just a grass field.

Like a football field.

A football field.

Okay.

It's a lot of space.

A lot of space for that gorilla to move around.

There's goalposts there, too.

He can start swinging his shit.

His arms literally look like trees.

It's crazy.

The way he's standing there.

It's unbelievable how strong they are.

Yeah, they are stronger, yes.

But the sheer negative,

the weight alone,

if you can get that roller down,

are strong as hell.

Yeah.

If you can get it down, though, and get a whole bunch of people on top of it, just smother them.

And you get them down.

That's the thing.

Yeah,

that's the trick.

That's the rub in the whole thing.

Can it be taken down?

Dogpile them and try to see if you get it.

I don't know.

I ain't trying to.

You wouldn't even be fucking in the top fucking

billion of people.

Give him the rope-dope.

More like the dope-does.

Yeah, we're not going for fucking handicapped.

Maybe they don't hit the bottom of the camera.

Auto workers are not going to be able

to draft into this.

Maybe

they don't hit the handicap.

Podcasters and auto workers are not going to be fucking drafted.

I like this.

You want to hear some Sunday funnies?

Maybe we all, you know, rope and dope them a little bit, and then everybody can get on them.

I think you could probably find a hundred people crazy enough to be like, I'll try it.

I'll do it.

No, I think it has to be

the fate of the planet has to be, it's like do or die, and there has to be big time consequences for not giving it your all.

And look, people have

throughout history, though, men have walked into fucking situations where they knew they weren't going to live and wars and shit.

So

it's not beyond the realm of

possibility that

you could convince like do or die situation.

Yeah, I think there's guys who would be like, yeah, I'm fucking ready to die for my planet or whatever needs to be done here.

What about that guy, Butterbean?

He punches pretty hard.

Butterbean.

He's older.

Big dude.

Big dude.

Even in his prime, though, I think he's just a fucking giant

target.

I don't think he's quick enough to do it.

The rock.

The rock.

There you go.

I forgot about the rock.

He's an actor, though.

Jesus, there.

He's a wrestler.

He said, no actor.

No, he was a wrestler first.

I know, I know, but he's more known for his acting, though.

I think at this point, I think Hollywood got to him.

I don't know if he's capable anymore of bringing what it needs to be done.

Most of those wrestlers went on to have acting careers.

Yeah.

Like I said, though, we only take champions, though, from the WWF.

Bruno Samantini, remember him from the 50s?

Anytime you bring him up, I always think of us in Wildwood and his picture on that pizzerio wall.

A black and white photo.

Iron sheet.

The iron sheet.

Macho Man.

Why are you?

Rick Flair.

Oh, there you go.

100 WWE superstars versus one gorilla.

And then they have all the people.

Oh, yeah, we didn't consider women in this.

Rhea Ripley, yeah.

Shigare Leonard.

Boxers, yeah.

But he's a lightweight, though.

You want heavyweights.

Larry Holmes.

Larry Holmes.

George Foreman.

Recipe.

George Foreman.

Yeah.

Tyson.

Vander Holyfield.

Kareem, didn't Kareem Abdul Jabbar train with

Bris Lee?

He did.

He's got the reach.

If you can keep him.

He did.

You're right.

Just a couple, you know.

But his arms are like twigs.

It's like the Wicker Man coming towards you.

And you didn't want to talk about it, probably, because you felt like it had been played out already?

Yeah, by the time I heard about it, I was like, wow, this is overdone.

Everybody on YouTube was talking about it.

Everybody on Reddit was talking about it.

Oh, so what?

Yeah.

No direct answers?

Nobody.

I agree now.

I agree.

No.

I just think people want to hear more gorilla talk, but

Sunday Jeff enlightened me.

Yeah, I agree with Sunday, though.

It's going to be

a tall feat.

It's going to be a tall feat.

And there's going to be a lot of funerals.

It's going to be a one-mass grave.

But I think, though, that's

at the end of the day, though, that's just too many people to overcome.

See, I think a steel cage, and the gorilla has the advantage because he can climb.

Yeah.

And just hang off the top and just fucking just bash people's heads and

swing somebody else into somebody else.

That's a problem.

Is like one punch to the gorilla is going to mean nothing from the crowd.

You're going to have to switch to the one punch from the gorilla, though, or one swipe is going to knock you right across the cage.

Break a leg, break an arm, you're down.

Knock you out.

Yep.

And then something, again, it's not even assuming that he can make a weapon out of he'll rip someone's arm off and just start beating other people with it.

Beat you with your own foot.

I mean,

I think they could rip an arm off of that.

You know, this is going to be a movie.

100 guys versus a gorilla.

Yeah.

Be a good video game.

It's going to be like a cheap to direct video.

Right.

Like Cocaine Gorilla.

Gorilla gets a hold of cocaine, so they send 100 people after it

to retrieve it.

What was that movie that took place in a building?

Oh, that one?

No,

no, it was.

I think there's a lot of movies take place in that one.

famous movie that was like different floors that the guy had to fight through.

A guy had to fight through.

Oh,

Asian movie.

Asian movie room.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fuck, what was the name of that episode?

So I'm saying the girl is in a building, and

he can't get out, and they send 100 people in.

John McLean?

Yeah.

Okay.

Arnold.

Oh, would Arnold be somebody who would make your copy?

Prime Arnold?

But he was an actor.

He's a bodybuilder, wasn't it?

Wasn't a proprietor.

Prime Lou.

Yeah, but most people know him.

A lot of people know him as an actor now.

Yeah.

Yeah, you're right.

Yeah.

But Arnold's big, though.

He was massive.

He was.

He was.

He was.

I thought about his prime.

I would think it would be better showing him now.

Like, if they all fought him like now, you have all these three people fight the girl now.

I want to ask you, I rarely bring up sports because I'm not educated that way.

But I am interested in this Bill Belichick

stuff.

What is going on?

Concerning.

Now, look, as a man with a much younger wife, I know people look at me and are like, what the fuck?

Sometimes, you know, like when I'm out in public, people have to be like, I thought that was her dad or whatever.

This is insane.

Why?

Because he's not only is she so much younger, like even younger than him, I mean, younger than me and Mary Beth, but the way she's, I mean, look at that bitch face she's got going on.

She's very involved in this relationship.

And like, I saw that she now owns $6 million worth of real estate despite having nothing before.

Yeah, well, she's doing a lot of talking for him, it seems like.

Before this interview even happened, though, I was telling Rupp one day, I was like, I saw this video of Belichick, and it's taken from the stands at North Carolina State.

And it's like, it's not a practice, but it's some sort of

on-the-field

activity that's going on with the players.

And she is leading him around, and he's got the shuffle going on.

And I go, I wonder if he's in the early stages of

some sort of dementia.

You know, very, very early stages.

Right.

You know, because

he just had that kind of

walk going on.

And she was the one on the field, which is super unusual that just like his girlfriend would be on the field when this is a man who commanded the field with the utmost respect of both his players and the rest of the league.

Like now it has his girlfriend

kind of

helping him to various places that he needs to get to on the field.

Right.

And this was before the interview.

Now, after this interview, it blew up.

Right.

You know, and I, because I remember telling Rup, I was like, I think, yeah, there might be something going on, early signs.

And I said, and you can't hide that shit when you're.

But he's coaching a team, though.

As I said, you can't hide that.

Like, when the season starts and you have to meet with everybody before the press, before the game and after the game, you're not going to be able to hide that.

It's going to come out.

So I wonder what they're going to do.

And now with this interview here, I mean, it came out literally a day later.

Now people are concerned that he's

something's going on.

How old is he?

73.

Oh, he's that old, huh?

Yeah.

I didn't think he was that old.

And I know he's been known to wear the ratty clothes.

I thought that too.

Like, he cuts his sleeves, and that's kind of been his

look.

He goes for the bedrock look.

But that's, and even Rupp said to me, I said, don't you think it's weird that he is dressed in this?

Now, I understand that's been his kind of like his

character.

His vibe is like, you know, I'm not a fancy,

I'm a no-nonsense kind of like nuts and bolts kind of dude.

I don't dress up and everything.

That's not what I do.

But that's on the sideline.

This is an interview.

I don't understand why you would show up with a moth-eaten sweatshirt.

Yeah, I didn't understand it either.

Makes no sense.

Yeah, that's what he would do on the sideline.

Yeah, that's regular.

That's about record.

Yeah.

But when you're in a CBS morning news interview i don't know why you can't wear at least wear the sweatshirt that doesn't have a hole in it

because it it looks right off the bat it's like well is this a fashion move or is this a move of somebody who doesn't like you like shut up my clothes or like it doesn't even realize there's a hole in it and the fact that she would like shut down questions from the reporter dude when she's when she was like we're not going to talk about that from like off camera yeah i i was just like if we were doing a podcast something that i could edit out and Mary Beth interjected in the middle like that, I would be like, are you out of your fucking mind?

Like, what are you doing?

No, I can handle it.

I don't need you.

24-year-old.

This is a man who has handled his business for 70-plus years, you know, winning multiple championships, conducting millions of interviews.

Now, all of a sudden, his girlfriend is dictating what he will

and multiple times.

Yeah, and he's trying to pimp a book.

Is he?

Yeah.

Did you watch the the interview?

I watched some of the interview, and

right off the bat, the first question that

makes you go, maybe something's not right, is he asks about being fired from the Patriots and Kraft firing him.

And he goes, no, it wasn't, I didn't get fired.

It was a mutual parting of the ways.

And then he goes, well, Kraft said he fired you.

And then he just stares at him.

And like helplessly, Belichick just stares at the reporter.

He's like, no, it was a mutual parting.

Very I noticed that too.

Yeah, but no, like

there wasn't letting no, like, he said

like flat.

The response is so strange,

and

he even has the

weird curvature of the lips going, where he's smiling inappropriately, right?

Smirking inappropriately at things that you're like, there's no reason to smile at this.

So, yeah, but the rumor is

that she comes from a world of high-end escorting.

Really?

That's the rumor on the internet.

Hung around with craft.

I'm not starting that.

Well, she was a cheerleader for a while, right?

Wasn't that the whole thing?

She was a cheerleader.

Maybe in high school.

Oh, I thought she was a cheerleader for a different team.

Wasn't she a cheerleader for a different team?

That's what it says here.

Oh, really?

And

she cheated on her husband with

Belichick or whatever.

Really?

With a 73-year-old?

Yeah, that would be rough, right?

He looks pretty good, though, for 73.

Physically, he looks pretty good.

You know, he doesn't look like your average 73-year-old.

She's got to definitely get the cheerleader leg.

Place him deflatable.

I thought she had no pants on at first when I saw the interview.

But it's going to be interesting because

you can't hide when you're deteriorating.

Oh, I know.

You cannot.

Especially when you've got a room full of reporters who are like, well, why did you?

We're looking for it.

Yeah.

And

what went into this decision-making?

If you say the wrong thing or you start going off on a tangent and it doesn't make any sense,

you're done.

You're done.

When the season starts,

how that coaching goes.

I don't know what North Carolina is.

Is that a Division I or a Division II school?

I don't know if he's playing the best schools or he's playing

in a.

Was that his choice, or did anybody from the NFL?

Did not offer him a job.

After this, I don't think they are offering him a job.

I think the dating of the 24-year-old

offered him to.

Atlanta gave him

an interview, but didn't hire him.

That weirdo.

So then maybe they do know something.

I mean, it's just weird.

Why would you not take one of the winningest coaches

even at that age?

The baggage that comes with it now with this girlfriend.

No, but I'm so sorry.

Was she with him during this whole time?

She got.

She's been around now for a couple of months, right?

No, I'm saying at the end of the day, like before all this, before he was

still looking to the Patriots, yeah.

Yeah, I don't think she was in the picture.

But I'm saying during that offseason, nobody from the NFL, I I can't believe nobody would have offered him some kind of

10-year contract.

They say the game has passed by.

I don't know if that's the case.

If I was an owner, I would definitely want to.

Kim Miche, right.

I mean, he's fucking done everything

and more than the guy you're hiring.

The only thing that would be a problem would be the age.

It says they met in 2023.

How old was Marl Levy?

He was old.

Yeah, he was old for the Bills.

He was an older, dude.

Most NFL coaches now are much younger.

They go in a much younger man now to lead.

Going in a different direction.

Yeah.

Well, they feel that they can identify more with the younger players.

I mean, Belichick.

Well, I mean, well, who's better than Belichick?

He's fucking dating someone younger than his players.

He's kind of known what they're interested in.

It's my Twitter handle.

Now,

does this tarnish his legacy?

Sure.

Is he one

crazy girlfriend story away from people remembering him?

For the crazy girlfriend.

For the crazy girlfriend rather than the seven Super Bowls.

That's what could happen here.

Like if something really fucked up comes out.

Yeah, she sets a house on fire.

Yeah.

Like people are going to be not going to remember him for all the rings.

You're going to remember him for all the fucking craziness that he was involved in towards.

I mean, maybe he's not getting the job offers because they're like, look, if this is his decision-making process, it's off.

Yeah.

It's off.

And we can't trust him to make good decisions on the field.

Yeah, I mean,

the truth be told is, I know what nobody wants to hear, but if he wants to bang 20-something-year-olds, he could do it.

But just don't date him.

Yeah, you don't have to date him.

Don't put him on your arm and let everybody know that you're doing it.

Don't do cheesy fucking Instagram pictures with the dude.

What are you doing?

Like, yeah, because now it's affecting everybody's perception of you.

Now, whose idea do you think that's a good thing?

But I'm saying, maybe you can go into a little bit deeper.

Maybe this is one of the reasons why Brady left, too.

Could be some of these issues, too.

You know, dress up like a mermaid.

Stuff that, you know, I mean, you see what's on TV.

You see stuff on the field.

You don't know what goes off the field.

You don't know what, you know what I'm saying?

You have no idea what's going on.

And he might be thought, but like, this is it for me.

I got to move on.

He came in with a ratty sweatshirt.

And they're not going to carry that.

No.

You know, he's doing crazy play calling.

He's eating 20-year-olds.

He hired a defensive coordinator to be his offense coordinator.

How fucked up is that?

That should have been the first signal that something was really off.

Well, the best defense is a good offense.

Right, but he hired.

He's a visionary.

He sees something different.

I can't remember the guy's name.

He's got a beard.

He puts a pencil.

He was a coach of the Lions.

He was terrible.

But he was a defensive coordinator for Belichick for years.

And he hires him and says, you're going to be my offense coordinator.

And he's terrible at it and fucks up Mac Jones's career, basically,

because he has a fucking defensive coordinator

calling the plays for offense.

Can't remember what the dude's name is.

God almighty.

Charlie Weiss, Josh McDaniels, Freddie Kitchens.

No, he's coach of the Lions, defensive coordinator for the Patriots.

I can't remember what his name is.

He's a terrible, he was a fiasco in Detroit, though.

I don't know, man.

Looks like things are going south real quick over there.

Poor Billy Chuck.

Matt Patricia.

Didn't even have to look it up.

Just took me fucking faster than your fucking Google.

And I can't see.

I can't even

see.

Actually, I didn't Google it.

I just remembered the name.

Yeah, I didn't Google it.

I remember the name.

It took me a while.

I can see his face.

I can see that stupid pencil behind his ear.

I started worried about you.

I don't remember.

It takes you under 18 20-year-olds.

That's a pencil.

This is the last story I had, and it's another weird, sexy story

about, let me see if I can just pull it up here or if it's going to give me a hard time like it fucking always does.

All right, there we go.

Florida woman Sunday, Jeff.

Florida nurse caught by her husband having sex with her 15-year-old stepson.

Now, this is usually teachers, right?

Usually teachers that

you have problems with the students and stuff.

The reason that this story stuck out really for me was so it's a Florida nurse was

was allegedly caught by her husband having sex with his 15-year-old stepson, her 15-year-old stepson, his son.

And the reason that she gave was because he reminded me of what you looked like when you were younger.

Who the fuck wants to hear that?

Like, no reason is better than that reason.

That's caught on the fly, you mean, I'm an awkward, I'm an awful.

You're just searching, you're just a, yeah, yeah.

Something like she starts calling his name out.

Oh, I thought it was you.

Well, I think you're right because it does, sort of be like, well, I was thinking of you.

Yeah.

You know, while I was doing this other thing that I shouldn't have been doing with your stepson.

And she's not a bad-looking lady.

Again, like

totally normal-looking lady.

What's the son looking like?

Is she going to jail now?

They didn't show.

I don't know.

She's going to be charged, and she should be charged with some sort of crime, I would think.

What's the rules in Florida?

So the dad came home.

The unsuspecting father and husband came home from his blue-collar job to discover, they have to throw that in there too, so you know it's even worse, not even at a job you like.

Discover his wife and son on the couch completely naked.

The 15-year-old ran out of the house, but allegedly heard Yates claim that this is, that's the lady, the child victim looked like his father when he was younger.

The father then drove his son to his grandparents' house, telling the boy he ruined his life while drinking beer on the way over.

Now, how do you reconcile with your son, though?

Oh, boy.

That's a tough one.

How do you navigate Thanksgivings and Christmases in the future now?

Like, how do you do that?

You were technically there first, so what's the dominance thing, I would think?

There you go.

She's charged with a felony, looter, lascivious battery with a victim aged 12 to 16.

She pleaded not guilty.

But that kind of portrayal.

Really?

Not guilty.

It's tough to.

That's worse than seeing your best friend or something.

I would think so.

Like blood.

I would think so.

Right.

And young, too.

So it's like, wait a second.

So it's not even with an older guy that's your age, roughly.

It's with, not only is it with a kid, but it's with my kid.

It's like, it's fucked up on a couple different levels.

Oh, yeah.

So the father was a linesman.

A Lions fan?

Linesman.

A Wichita lineman?

Well, he's a linesman for the county.

He's sadder than that guy.

And according to the teen, Von Yates' arousal stemmed from not having sex in two weeks, and she was on her period.

That's what the teen victim told cops.

Oh, boy.

They were watching the movie The Terrifier.

I had to do it.

That's always in the in-the-mood movie.

People get ripped apart.

How do you make it up to

your dad?

Again, if you do, if you're that kid.

Take yourself back to when you were dead.

What do you say?

Do you get him a gift?

Do you get him a watch?

Do you get him something he's always wanted?

What do you do?

You give him.

Share an attitude.

I don't think Hallmark makes a card for that.

That is a toughie.

Maybe you have like a body.

Do you think you could could mend the bridge?

Do you think build the bridge back?

Do you think you could get back to where you guys were after that kind of thing?

I think time heals all wounds.

You do?

I think you both take a stance of a mutual.

Blame it on her.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, right.

You say you got to poison the well big time on her.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

What's the first thing you say?

I don't know.

I could have married that bitch.

Well, you got to play the victim for sure.

You've got to really be like, you know, she drugged me.

Yeah, I didn't want to, but she kept like well, I could say that she was doing this stuff like she was putting whipped cream on her tongue and sticking it out at him and

being playful and flirty.

Yeah,

so I don't know.

I don't know where you go from there.

I tried to tell her no.

She's just

weak.

You're weak at that stage.

And it's a stepmom.

That's true.

Well, she looks like she's in.

She doesn't look too happy there.

Her mug shot doesn't look the same as her picture with the makeup.

No.

No.

Well,

she's got a football player neck, too.

Yeah, she does have a wide neck.

Maybe I might enlist her again on my team that's going to take down the

gorilla.

So have sex with the gorilla.

Then the other guys can jump on.

Entice the gorilla.

Did we do a puck nuts a little segment before we sign off?

Oh, do we need?

Yeah, I guess we could.

We got to talk about the

more ads?

Nope, that's it for ads.

The devil's getting ousted.

The season ended this week.

You knew that.

I knew that wasn't.

I did not think they were going to go far.

Now, tell me if this is weird.

I hate Carolina.

I can't stand it.

Yeah, Carolina's been a fucking game.

We won one of the worst possible games in their history.

And it's tough to watch.

Carolina has the Devils' number, but tell me if this is weird.

So every year when the Devils get eliminated, whether it be they don't make the playoffs or they get eliminated in the playoffs,

almost a sado-masochistic, is that the right word?

Move is I will watch the entire post-game, and they're usually a lot longer because it's a wrap-up and they're saying goodbye, and I'll get emotional.

Really?

No, not for the team, but for the, like, they, they make you, they kind of convince you that, like, you know, they're like, thank you for spending time with us.

Teddy's Kedola, here right now.

Teddy just jumped on the table and just like, what's going on up here?

Talking about devils?

Hey, I'm like, did that get my interest?

It gets me, it gets me like in the heart when they're like when they're like and they're saying their their goodbyes and they're like, Well, we're not going to see you guys again until the fall.

And it really can choke me up a little bit.

And I wonder what that's going to be.

It feels like I'm saying goodbye to friends.

Well, some of the players will not be back.

No, I'm not talking about the players.

I'm talking about the talking heads.

And I think that's weird, right?

Like, what's going on that I'm getting emotional that I'm not going to hear Danico until October?

Or

that might be okay.

So it's just,

you know, I look at it as like, look, they made the playoffs this year.

Yeah.

They had, you know, a pretty good season.

They kind of like tailed off at the end.

I mean, they were really struggling.

And I didn't, at one time, I mean, when they were talking about the Rangers are only a couple points behind them, the Islanders are already, I mean, they won the kind of games that they needed to win, but they just weren't playing the same style of play.

And it's just like, once again, the playoffs are decimated.

They had a lot of injuries, And it's hard to get those other players up and try to find the right line combinations.

So, and I said before we were on

Mike, I told you about what, you know, you saw the

postgame with Keith.

He was just saying, just like, look,

these are the tools that he has, and these are the people that he has.

And, you know,

you have to make best, and hopefully you get, you know, but even if they got past the first round, I don't think they were going to really make a splash this year.

But, I mean, they definitely need to retool.

There's definitely some things they need to do on the offensive.

Speaking of retooling, what do you think of the Giants pick?

You got your quarterback of the future.

Are you happy?

We'll see.

He's rolling ice.

We'll see.

It's just, you know, it's more than a, I mean, it starts with the quarterback, but you know what?

You need an offensive line.

That's one of the most important things you need.

Quarterback ain't worth shit if you ain't got no offensive line.

And what do you think about the Sanders

drop in the draft

going from potentially being number one to falling all the way to the fifth round.

They said losing $10 to $30 million in the process.

Yeah, and

going to a wasteland, barely an NFL franchise in Cleveland where they quarterbacks go to die.

Did they do it to him because he was being such a flashy show-off and stuff with the chains and the

I think that there was a lot of red flags in terms of his

mentality.

They're Deion Sanders sons, so therefore.

Yeah, and you're

you as the quarterback you need to be able to

lead the team and not be

and not stand out as like

look I'm I'm here all by myself I'm that fucker flashy and everything where you need to be able to like

bring all both sides of the ball together and not be that and not be a polarizing figure show that you play as well as your father did and then you can start talking yeah but I'm very curious to see what he does in Cleveland, man, because Cleveland is just

dying for anything, success of any kind, and with the Browns.

I just, I don't understand.

It's like all these years, like all the draft picks and everything else, like even like now you said

Kansas City finally turned their teams around, and they're actually, you know, they won some Super Bowls now.

It's like Cleveland just never, and the Jets, it's another one.

It's just like, it's just, how do you get these teams to turn around?

Well, you draft a fucking generational talent in Patrick Mahomes, but that's the difference.

Like, Patrick Mahomes,

he's that good where he could act like, he could act a fool of the way with like, you know, like, I'm going to make rap videos.

I'm not going to practice.

Right.

If you win.

I'm going to arrive in a hot air balloon.

Yeah, you could do all that crazy shit.

You don't think they're saying that if you win Super Bowl.

But he hasn't won anything yet, so you can't do that.

You have to.

Yeah, you're going on a job interview, basically, and you're telling teams that you don't even want to play there.

You got to prove.

You got to prove yourself.

And that's a red red flag, I think.

It's like, if you don't want to play here, so what's going to happen when the first bit of adversity hits?

You know, yeah, it's, yeah, he costs himself a lot.

Isn't that what Eli Manning did?

Well, Eli Manning did it.

He didn't want to play for Sunday.

He didn't want to play for the Chargers, but he didn't, but he also wasn't making rapids.

He wasn't possible.

Yeah, he wasn't like.

He is now, but he wasn't back then.

I should hate the guy.

I should hate Eli Manning.

But man, he is hard to hate.

He really has a sense of humor.

He has a great personality.

They are pretty whack.

Wasn't Shador walking around with like a pocketbook full of a million dollars?

A pocketbook?

Yeah.

Like a coach.

Something like that, yeah.

The only thing I heard was that he had a chain that was worth about a hundred grand on.

Yeah.

I think he's prioritizing.

I think he knows it now.

I mean, if he doesn't, if he hasn't learned a lesson now, then he's never going to learn it.

But

he prioritized all the wrong things, though.

Sorry, it was a Louis Vuitton bag with a million dollars.

That's just great.

What's the matter with this country?

They all got like hats on and chains with dollar signs and shit and money.

Yeah, it's

just ugly, you know.

Like, who wants to see

especially like if you're unproven?

I don't know if it's ugly, isn't so much it shows.

Well, it doesn't even show.

It's a flag, it's a red flag that you can't

be

trusted to make sure that

you're the CEO, basically, of a company as the quarterback.

You're the face of that franchise.

I don't know.

Do you want the face of the franchise to be like

a party animal?

Right.

You know, it's Johnny Manzel all over again.

But we haven't seen this guy play professional football yet.

He may be.

He may be able to fucking walk the walk and talk the talk and also party like it's 1999 as Prince said and

and still play fucking lights out I don't know that remains to be seen though not too many players that were successful doing that no I mean I think wide receivers can have that flamboyant personality defensive backs yeah but the quarterbacks usually don't have that kind of lightning rod personality supposed to be like nice and steady yeah

calm and steady

that was your puck nuts minute i think it was more than than a minute from me.

Raise nuts.

We never really answered your question, which was like, is it weird that

is it weird that I get like

and I and I watch it to the bitter end, even though there's really nothing to hear that I'm not going to hear anything that I don't already know that's why you do it though because you you know it's over until

torture it's just you know do you spend a lot of time with these guys during the season?

Yeah,

do you watch the games?

Now he does

courtesy of foo-boo,

But yeah, I think it's weird, though, that

almost like it's like a television show ending.

It's like a series finale.

And

you don't know if the whole cast is coming back because remember that blonde girl didn't come back.

And I didn't even know she wasn't coming back.

And I didn't even get to be like, like, like, come to grips with, like, holy shit.

I kind of feel the same way.

Sam Rosen retired permanently

at the end of the season.

It was kind of tough.

Did you have tears in your eyes?

A little.

There was a lot of people who wanted her back, though.

There was a big Erica Walkner.

Yeah, they made a big series.

Nobody knows about her, but I'm just saying it's.

Tell them, Steve, Dave.

You're treading into ISO College.

Erica Walker got mentioned.