#608: Bry the Pony

1h 19m
Q gets a haircut, an ant proposes, Walt defends IHOP, Nashel rocks out, birth year envy.

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Transcript

Hey, hey, hey, it's that Patreon plug portion of the show, and I am extremely excited to announce this Tuesday's release is TESD Game Night with two of some of my most favorite people in TESD Town as Tim the Record Store Clerk teams with the one and only Dr.

Eric Johnson.

Will Brian and yours truly stand triumphant at the show's end, or will we slink away with our tails between our legs?

You'll just have to watch or listen to find out.

Here's a hilarious clip to tide you over till Tuesday.

Now, Tim, where did you pick up the moniker Tim the Record Store Clerk?

Walt.

Really?

Yeah.

I never would have thought that's how you got such a cool, fun nickname.

Well, I don't think it's cool or fun, but okay.

I'm just finding this out now.

I need a wacky zinny nickname, just like you.

Okay.

That good one works.

Yeah, it does.

Not on girls, though.

All right, so let's go to the floor followers.

Not sure it's a name.

First up, Walt.

Hey, my car here says, you want to save the shopping plaza?

Go ahead, I'm sorry.

My cardier says, you want to save the shopping plaza from a Mitcha volcano.

I've got another story behind that.

Now that's some funny shit.

I am obligated to also warn any subscribers that if you are triggered by fierce competition, well, maybe you should skip the TST game night episodes.

I've received some feedback from a few of of you out there who just aren't fans of men who want to win and show they want to win the games they play.

I know things have changed so much and men engaged in testosterone-fueled competitive board game play at the highest level might be a turnoff to some in today's world.

But I still cling to the belief any game worth playing is a game worth winning.

And I will play by any means necessary to achieve victory.

And if that upsets you, you know, I'm sure there's some soy recipe videos on YouTube you can go watch.

But if you crave board game playing in their prime athletes going head to head looking for any advantage that will allow me to put my foot on their necks then you just got to go to tsd patreon and join up now to be a part of all the ball busting fun all right let's get back to tsd

So what's been happening this week?

No assassination attempts.

Nothing to talk about.

Nobody else is, so why shouldn't it be?

You got hair in your nuts?

That means you're a man.

You're in the fan.

Why can't a white man get his hair cut here?

Finally, someone said it out loud.

Tell him, Steve Dave.

Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave, starring Walt Flanagan,

Brian Quinn,

and me, your announcer, Brian Johnson.

Hey, boys.

Hello.

We're back again.

Here we are.

Here we are.

To talk about stuff.

Yeah.

You got a nice, you got a fucking smart haircut.

I'm just noticing that.

You like my haircut?

Yeah, I do.

You think it's smart?

Yeah.

All right.

You got a little bit of a faux hawk going?

Yeah, it's a little bit of a, you know, I'm off the chain now, bud.

I'm not working.

You know, whatever you want.

Doing, there's no continuity issues.

There's no nothing.

I can fucking.

Oh, I thought you were saying the network maybe had to approve all haircuts.

No, you just got to kind of look the same for the whole season.

We failed at that miserably in Combo, man.

Everybody had different color hair hair every other day.

Yeah, so we did.

But I don't know.

So I got a little bit of a yeah like a

I don't want to say a mullet.

It's not exactly that.

No, I wouldn't call it a mullet.

But it's hot.

It's very tight on the sides.

Do you like it?

Yeah, I do.

You look like McElmore.

My boy Akeem does it for me.

He does it.

He just, it's his 19th birthday tomorrow.

Happy birthday to my haircutter, Akeem.

Now, would you want a 90-year-old cutting your hair?

We were talking earlier about how you would want a 90-year-old to do any job.

Yeah, I just feel like they're more experienced, they just care more, they're not distracted by their phone

or their Instagram, right?

And you know, you're always not going to be worried about uh anything other than your hair if you've got a 90-year-old doing it.

Well, he, like I said, he's 18.

This kid's a bit that's the exact opposite, and he didn't once look at his phone.

Like, there was

you had your back to him, no, he's working on my hair the whole time, yeah.

But at some point, behind, you know, he was working.

He's looking in the mirror the whole time, I'm working on BQ.

no nine year old

selfies

we're having a lovely conversation i was learning it's how i keep

i have a young i have a younger guy who does my hair and i have to i mean not real young he's probably in his like early 40s but you're not wrong about that phone

every two minutes he's checking a text or his wife is calling or some shit no not not not not keem he's great he's great love this kid love this kid but do you go in and say what you want or you let a keem like say like hey keem what's hot right now what's no i don't go in and say what's hot uh no i i you know i go in and i'm like uh ah let's just try something a little you know and you let him pick it though uh you know

no we don't do a magazine it's more like uh

sister on the wall yeah i just kind of go in or i show him a haircut that i had years ago that i liked you know which is what happened here um

and uh he just goes to town.

Now, is this somebody that like just shows up at your house or is he at a certain salon?

No, he salon, it's a,

it's, it's pretty funny because it's like, I think I might be the only white person that goes there.

It's like a classic like barbershop.

Oh, really?

But young.

It's like, and, you know, they do

locks and all the stuff that I don't, that I'll never take advantage of.

You're not going to do any

corns or anything?

No, nothing like that.

But that is their stock in there.

Cornrows?

Cornrows, corn rolls?

No, they do all that.

But I wouldn't do any of that.

But it's nice.

It's nice.

I get to go in.

What made you choose this place?

Because traditionally,

white people do not go to black barber shops because, like you say, the black barbers specialize in certain types of haircuts.

Yeah.

Well, what happened?

Yeah, I really needed a haircut.

And I was driving by this place

and

I was like,

what am I?

Why can't I?

You know what I mean?

Like, who am I?

Breaking down doors.

Yeah,

why can't I go in?

Like, let's not see.

Smashing taboos.

Yeah.

So I went in and

it was a damn great little.

Why can't a white man get his haircut here?

Finally, someone said it out loud.

No, nothing like that.

They were very welcoming.

I didn't walk in on a record, didn't scratch or anything like that.

But what school is they didn't recognize me for like the first like couple of months.

So it was like, I was nice and quiet.

You know what I mean?

Like it was like, so I was a little odd, I'm sure, for walking in.

And

especially my age, because everybody in there is like, like I said, Akeem's 18.

I think they were all like the oldest ones there, 24.

And you like to walk into a place and be not recognized?

Or does...

a little bit of anxiety come with that like oh shit is it over losing my mojo no no no no never like that Yeah, I don't mind it.

Yeah.

Because I've gone to other places and right away, for the first day, they're like, yo, let's get a picture put on the Instagram and stuff like that.

And it's like, I don't really want to.

Well, I guess it depends on the situation.

Because last week you were late because of

traffic.

Yeah.

Now that is a great example of being recognized pays off because you got to scoot along that little shoulder.

Yeah, well that fireman friends.

That was good because those are my firemen guys.

That wasn't even like for the, you know, that was, they, you know, they made fun of me while I went by.

Oh, did they?

Yeah, and and my friends.

I can't even drive by.

Oh, I was told I would give him the finger as I was going by.

Yeah, it was great.

Now, his young age didn't scare you off.

No.

Now, so he is not an experienced barber, right?

He's just starting out in his career.

Sure.

So if he had, I don't know if I ever told you the story when I was.

He said it when he started when he was 16.

So he's a couple years ago.

Relatively new.

Yeah, relatively new.

Could you give him the pass if he was cutting your hair?

Because this happened to me once.

And he's looking at you and and he's like, he's making sure everything's nice and even.

He's giving you the once over.

And he sees some hair on your forehead and all of a sudden he blows it off with his mouth.

Like

he literally blows the hair off your face with his mouth.

That would be weird.

That happened to me once.

A lady did that.

That's weird.

And I didn't say anything, but I was just like, wow.

I probably wouldn't say anything either, but I probably wouldn't go back.

I've never had that happen before

or since.

But yeah,

could you go back?

I wouldn't go back.

I wouldn't say anything, but I think I wouldn't go back.

I'd be like, what the?

But he doesn't know.

It's his first time.

You You could be like, hey, you know what, Keem, that usually

I came into this shop.

No, no, no.

That would get out on the internet or something.

It's like, oh, BQ came into my shop and he got all fucking boidy-toity with me just because I blew in his face.

I mean, she blew so hard that my hair moved on my head.

Wind.

Yeah.

She was trying to get wet hair off my forehead, so she had to blow really hard.

Get to dry the wetness and get it off.

Yeah, boom.

So there you go.

So what's been happening this week?

No assassination attempts.

Nothing to talk about.

Nobody else is, so why should we?

You know, can I do give a plug for a dear friend?

Joe Gatto.

Friend of this show,

has a comedy special out.

Apparently, I'm the last person.

just, everybody but me has a comedy special, I guess.

So,

but his is really fucking funny.

I saw him tape it.

And it's out today on the 800-pound gorilla YouTube page.

And it's fucking really fun.

That's the way to release stuff these days, like release specialties, YouTube, huh?

Yeah, because you're like not, you're around the gatekeepers, and like any monetization that's being done is coming your way rather than like Comedy Central paying you a pittance and

doing that.

And I think there's ups and downs to it is what I'm hearing.

But it's Gatto.

He makes the best out of fucking everything.

And he made a great fucking special.

It's one of the funniest that I've seen.

It's weird a guy like Joe Gatto.

He's worth studying.

He is.

He's so positive.

And he's like, you, Walt, he doesn't do any drugs or drink or anything like that.

Yeah, yeah.

Straight edge.

Straight edge.

And he has no fear.

Like, he'd like.

Oh, I have fears.

He, he, you don't say.

He doesn't have any.

Like, he, when he recorded the special, he was like, yeah, I don't even know if I'll release it.

We'll just see how it comes out.

And they recorded it.

He's like, No, I like it.

I'll release it.

Like, there's no, like, but I'm making a special.

What am I going to do?

Like, there's no panic.

No anxiety.

Yeah, he's just, I've always admired it about him.

He just kind of does it.

Even leaving the show, he's like, you know, got to go.

What are you going to do?

But I'm very proud of him.

And it's a great, it's a great, very funny special.

And I would be great if anybody out there could support Joe Getto.

All right.

He needs a couple fans.

Go give him some views because that's, I think, one of the downsides is the views.

Like people see how many people watched it.

Right.

It's not like an HBO special where it's like, you may just be buying on there.

So you think that's a negative thing to see the views?

That's the part.

Like it could never be enough.

Yeah, because, well, it's that thing, too, because I'm just guessing, but like, once those numbers are out there, you're like,

I guess you have an idea in your own head of what it should do.

And then if So it's one of those weird things where it's like the success is entirely up to you.

If you're like, I hope 50,000 people watch it, Joe's going to clear that immediately.

You know what I mean?

But if he's like, I hope 2 million people watch it and a million people watch it, you could be like, that's a bigger number.

He hasn't told me any of this.

I'm just putting myself in his place.

So that's always like,

I don't know what number you want to be successful in it.

Right.

So, but I'll never know because I'll never do it.

You don't think you'll ever do it?

Do a stand-up special?

Yeah, or a comedy special of some kind of.

It doesn't necessarily have to be stand-up.

Is what Joe does stand-up or does he tell stand-up?

Well, I guess it's a version of stand-up.

Yeah, I don't see me doing it, ever doing it.

How much more do people need to hear from me and my thoughts and opinions for 15 fucking years now?

I don't know.

That's every comic, though, right?

Like, every comic is out there thinking the same thing.

Like, they need to hear my thoughts and my ideas and my jokes.

It's the thing about stand-up, I have great respect for stand-ups.

I love the medium.

Like, I respect it.

I don't think, I mean, it's not something that I really want to do, but like, the thing that made stand-up comedy a little less cool to me is social media and promotion because motherfucker like all instagram is my whole feed is just like i have this i have that watch this watch that i'm coming to your town i'm coming here and it's just like i can't think of george carlin doing a face towards the camera selfie video being like i'm coming to fucking new orleans next week so it's like that that not that i'm hating on them for do it i just like i it kind of makes me not want to do it if that's what i have to do the self-promotion yeah yeah

yeah

some people are good at it some people are great at it love it yeah and and i'm not saying there's anything wrong with them i i wish i had that skill yeah

we'd probably be like rogan if we had good self-promotional skills i don't have them either

would you say would you say you have self-promotional

skills um because you're a quieter guy you like to stay in the yeah i don't really run to social media to announce you know every little aspect of everything and like as

you probably should though if you're and make your money on the internet

yeah, I guess so.

There's no other way, yeah.

Yeah, I'm not saying they're doing anything wrong.

No, I'm just saying I couldn't do it.

It takes some skill to make it not seem annoying.

You know, those guys who can walk that tightrope of still making their little plugs funny, interesting, and not

like, oh, God, not another one.

You would think there's almost a science to it, like, keep it short, keep it funny, keep it relevant.

I understand a couple of members of the Tesdown are getting hitched.

Oh, we're supposed to, we're breaking that news?

Well, I guess we're breaking it as a podcast, but it's already been on Instagram and

Facebook and stuff.

Jimmy the hair guy proposed to his gal

in the general store last night.

How does she feel about that?

The general store is the.

Oh, I think she was over the moon.

She listens?

I don't know if she listens, but

I guess she was just over the moon that it happened at all.

Prince Charming, yeah.

It could have been in a a parking lot of a Wawa.

It still would have been Jimmy the hair guy proposing to you.

Yeah, you're right.

Regardless, that's who that's your man.

It doesn't matter where you're right, you're right.

It just matters that he got on that knee.

Yeah, it just seems to be like a ring.

It's doing it here, makes it a little bit more about him than her.

Uh, I don't know.

I didn't look at it that way.

I think

he

put a lot of thought into it.

Yeah, what did he do?

He pretended that he was making

pretending he was terminally ill.

Shaved his head.

Lost a whole bunch of weight.

Diet pills.

Oh, that picture.

He pretended that

TSD was making

a documentary about Jimmy the Hair Guy, a day in a life of Jimmy the Hair Guy.

So he brought her down to do an interview where she was going to be interviewed, where we would like cut to different people talking about Jimmy, and she'd be one of the people we spoke to.

So, Rupp and Chuck were giving her questions,

and

then Jimmy just casually walked up like a fucking suave Mac daddy.

He was like, I got a question,

and here's my question.

And he got down on a knee and popped it.

Wow, man, good for him.

Yeah, well, you were here, I was here, yeah.

Did you tear up at all?

Um, I didn't tear up.

No, I've seen my shit.

Get him's nodding.

Get him is not.

Get him teared up.

Yeah, I I guess he did.

I don't know.

I thought he didn't like Jimmy the hair guy.

He just likes love.

Yeah.

Can you tell he's a romantic at work?

Oh, wow.

I'm surprised he didn't do it like they were just at John Waters camp.

He was sending me pictures from John Waters' camp.

I'm not exactly sure what that entails.

John Waters camp, but I think it has a lot to do with penises and like dirty John Waters type stuff.

It's a whole camp for it, eh?

A whole camp.

Yeah, you you can go away for the weekend.

Well, I think it also

is touching for us

is that he could have did it at a Juggalo event where they met, and he chose here, though.

No, I agree.

It's very touching for everybody but her.

Like, she's not a Telamsteve Dave fan.

Like, Juggalo would have made sense to me.

Yeah, she might be.

I just don't know if she is or not.

Heads are shaking over that.

Heads are shaking.

No, she's not.

No.

So, yeah, why here then?

I guess.

Rip says just a surprise.

Yeah, it would be the ultimate surprise as opposed to, like, you might expect it at a Jugglo event or John Waters camp, but when you come here.

Yeah.

No, she actually, she flat out told him.

She goes, she knew it was happening.

Oh, really?

Oh, my God.

How'd she know?

What are you doing?

You have video of it?

Oh, I want to watch this.

It's already on YouTube.

It's on YouTube already.

Michelle,

will you marry me?

Yeah.

I didn't think you were going to ask me questions.

All right.

But yeah, she

had

strong suspicions.

It was happening yesterday.

She just didn't know where, but she kind of was like, had a gut feeling it was going to happen.

Wow.

Is that good or bad?

I don't know.

I think it's good.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think so.

So she can brace herself.

Means like

she picks picks up on his vibe.

Did you see the ring?

Yes.

Is it a Lord of the Rings ring?

Yes.

It is.

Okay.

Yes.

All right.

Yeah, I think it was Gandalf's ring.

It's the one ring.

The one ring?

The precious.

Precious.

Wow.

She's

so happy.

You know why you could just walk directly a foot to the right?

She's sitting in my chair.

Oh, man.

Anything that I would say to kind of, you know, goof on him after watching that video, you can't.

They're both so happy.

It's really nice to see.

Yep.

Yeah.

Congratulations, guys.

She has giant earrings that say shit on them.

Eat shit on them.

Oh, it says eat shit on the other one.

Yeah.

You got to be like that to handle Jimmy the hair guy.

Yeah.

Got to be that way just to make it in this world today.

She's fucking damn right about that.

Eat shit, baby.

It's great.

She's all teared up and everything.

Yeah, yeah.

But he texts me and he's like, I want you to be there.

I was like, Dad.

Okay.

Well, I was like, why do you need me to be there, though?

And he goes, well, it won't feel like a real deal documentary if you're not there, like, directing it.

She'll know something's up.

Like, all right.

So I was here.

So there is no documentary.

No, there is no documentary.

I can't believe they put it on YouTube already, though.

Well, it's private.

Oh, it's private?

Yeah.

Oh, so how on earth did want?

They may not want this on Tom Steve, Dave, then.

Well, they said they posted it, so.

The audio, you mean?

Well, I'll check with Jimmy the hair guy.

We'll see if he cares.

I doubt he'll care.

Oh, okay.

So,

but yeah, you got to make sure, though.

And if that's so a private channel, then you don't want they may not.

Oh, that's why I had it on mute at first, but okay.

Yeah.

Jimmy, man, he's all wide-eyed.

It's nice to see Jimmy like

hitting above his fucking

station too.

Yeah, she's fucking above his pay grade.

Yeah, very nice looking lady

And she's super sweet too.

Yeah, she's really nice.

I mean not that Jimmy's not a good looking guy

You're saying though he's not as good looking as she is.

I am saying that yeah that's what I thought

But good.

Yeah, that's a compliment.

Why not?

You don't want a girl as good looking as you

I heard

That after the zombie concert everybody went to IHOP

and Walt Karen Doubt on a waitress.

You got the wrong burger and you went Karen on her.

Talk to a manager about it?

She wanted to talk to a manager.

Who told you this?

I hear things.

You know, I talked to Troy.

It was the exact 180-degree opposite.

That's what he said.

Yeah.

I know you would have fucking threw a fucking conniption.

I don't know.

After he described the way it went, I think I would have been defeated.

I ordered a completely plain burger.

Yeah.

And

they only have one waitress there on a Friday night or Saturday night, whatever night.

Good idea.

It's hard to get someone to work a 24-hour

IHOP in New Jersey.

I think they're lucky they even have one waitress.

I think it's very difficult to staff a 24-hour place in this day and age.

Well, no matter what you hear about Jersey, too, there aren't that many 24-hour places anymore.

It's the only place around here to go 24 hours, unless you're going to fucking Wawa or something.

And so it took a long time for us to get get our food.

And she brought it over and I could see it's, it's way too large of a burger for, there's too much, I could tell already it's too tall to be a plain burger.

And so I open it up and it has cheese on it and

some other stuff on it.

And I just said, I said, oh, I'm sorry.

I said, I ordered a plain burger.

And she goes, that is a plain burger.

And for a second there, I looked at it.

I looked down and I was like, whoa, what is she talking about?

Is this what I hoped for?

Is there something wrong with my mind?

I really questioned my own sanity.

I was like, wait a minute, I am seeing cheese on this, right?

I'm not the only one who sees cheese.

I was like, oh,

well, I just wanted it with nothing on it.

She goes,

that is a plain burger.

She just conveyed, she made straight face, like the poker face.

I'm mind-tricking.

I wouldn't have had a conniption, but at that point, I would have been like, okay, she's challenging me on this shit.

Let's fucking dance.

I was just like, well,

is it possible to get one without all this on it?

And she goes, yeah.

And she just pulled it back.

And then I did get a plain burger, though.

Yeah, I was really bummed because it was after the zombie concert.

Everybody was going to IHOP, but of course, Mary Beth's fucking stomach is acting up, so she has to go home.

Right.

And of course.

What's that caveat of

it?

Because it seems like she constantly has stomach issues that prevent me from doing stuff I want to do.

What other things is she preventing you from doing with her stomach?

Well, so far, just that.

But yeah, so we had to go home, but then I heard it was like nightmarish almost.

What, the IHOP?

The IHOP.

It just took forever.

That's insane.

It's a Saturday night, and there's a lot of people there.

I don't know if there was an overflow from the zombie crowd.

It had to be.

That's why they're fucking stupid at IHOP is because you know that there's a PNC event.

You know that people are going to be coming afterwards.

Have more than one fucking waitress.

I think it's hard just to have one there.

I think if they could have two, they would.

Yeah.

I really do.

I just think it's impossible.

I bet you the turnover as an IHOP waitress on that night shift is fucking phenomenal.

Right.

That lady went home that night.

She's like, this guy wanted a fucking plain burger.

I brought him a plain burger with cheese.

But we've been there on nights and there's three people working on it.

Exactly.

And it's still slow as can be.

Like, it's 10 minutes to get an hour.

I'm sorry.

That's not true.

Yes, it is.

It's way quicker than

it's not abnormally slow when there's only only three people there.

I don't know what kind of service you're demanding at an IHOP, but you have to expect.

Like when we sit down, have someone come over and bring water, like within after they ask, five minutes.

It takes 10 minutes.

No, it takes 10 minutes for them to bring out even like water and drinks.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, I agree with you, Goodim.

At a restaurant, I'm a very impatient person.

I feel like there should be a standard where it's like, you know, and there is a standard for restaurants.

Like if you've worked in a restaurant, you know that it's like you greet the people, you bring them to the table.

the waitress comes within X amount of time, you bring the drinks within X amount of time.

Not like, you know, hey, we'll get to you when we get to you.

I think on an IHOP, I think you have to give

it a little bit.

It's kind of hard, though.

But then, yeah, like, you only have one person, and she had like a one person's rough.

But like the times you've gone, it's like you get chicken fingers or a plain burger, I'll get like a cheeseburger, someone else will get a cheeseburger, and it's 25 minutes for it to come out.

And it's like, even if you're cooking them, nothing.

No, I'm saying it just seems like there's a general laissez-faire.

Oh, shit, this is coming from the guy that was fucking sleeping on the couch and being paid for it before.

Are you fucking out of your mind that you're holding other people's feet to the fire when you sleep during the workday?

I disagree with you, man.

Is there any greater authority than on laissez-faire?

Jesus.

The food coming out sucks.

For me, it's like when you get your salad before you even get your drink that you know the waitress.

That's where I start being like, What the fuck?

Like, how do I have soup in front of me before an iced tape?

Like, it doesn't make any sense.

But yeah, I don't like to go out to eat with people like, like, who are impatient like that.

Like, we, me, and Giddam went out to see Brian Dichelle just joined a band,

and Giddam was being very demanding of our Red Robin waiter.

Like, he's like, More fries, more fries.

Jesus.

Hell no.

When he brought me my food, I'm like, can I get another one?

More fries.

Because we were saying that cat, more fries.

We were in a time crunch.

You could only say two words because you have so many fries in your mouth.

He doesn't have the time to say please.

We're in a time crunch.

Just blinking like fucking, like, the guy knows that blink should mean more fries because my mouth is fucking stuffed with fries.

Four.

I was banging the basket on the table.

I did not get that clue.

You let him get that second thing of fries?

You're not like.

What am I?

I can't stop.

What am I?

His fucking...

I'm not his wife or his father.

I can't stop him.

You're the closest thing.

Can you really tell me you're going to stop him from getting more?

How many fries did you get that?

Three baskets?

At least three.

Oh, man.

Within a fucking 10-minute period.

Oh, that's rough.

Roderick later is like, you're kidding, right?

You can't be for real.

I'm on camera.

And

Nichelle joined a band.

And he had his first gig up in Short Hills at

a nice restaurant that's attached to a train station a train station in Short Hills so they played in the in the train station where people buy tickets and stuff it's very unique but like busking like it was just public

no no I don't think so it was indoors right it's indoors it's when the station closes it becomes part of the restaurant

but there's places where you could sit and wait for the train yeah just like a normal like um train station sure in in inside and they've only had one practice together so they they are

so new.

Nice, like they're just born, basically, a just born band, a baby band.

And

that didn't matter.

As I saw, we got into the fucking wrong game, man.

Podcasting is not the way we should have went.

We should have started a three-man band

because within an hour of becoming a band, they had girls dancing on the fixtures.

Yeah.

They had a lady take off her top.

Whoa.

Day one.

She's right there at the gate.

I've yet to see it.

I'm not bullshit.

Right, Giddam?

No, no.

Wow.

I was just.

What type of music were they playing?

Classic rock.

Fuck yeah, they're still doing it in Jersey, man.

This is why I love this fucking game.

The funny part of it is that, like,

if somebody's going to play a song you know and you're drunk, you're having a fucking great time right now.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, they played some Jimmy E.

World, and you could ask, Walt, I was rocking out to that.

Oh, they dropped a little in the middle on you?

Yeah, yep, yep, yep.

I mean, Ginnam is not making it to how old are you?

45.

You're not making it to 50.

He's at fucking Red Robin.

He's taking fucking 15 baskets.

He's trying to take baskets with him from other

tables out for us.

No, no.

And then he gets to the fucking restaurant, and within an hour, he drinks how many bottles of beer?

16?

16 bottles?

No, it's like eight or nine.

Wow.

That's a lot.

Yeah.

He ain't making it to 50.

There's no way.

He's got to fucking curtail the way he's living.

He's not making it much past 50, maybe.

Yeah, you've got to slow down, bro.

12-ounce bottles, they go down like nothing.

Yeah, but it's not good on your body, though, all that fucking alcohol and shit.

Again, like eight or nine in 12-ounce bottles, so nine times 12 is what, 108?

So that's you're pretty close to a gallon of beer.

That's like two bottles away from a gallon.

It's light beer, though.

Everything always is always.

What does that mean?

Is there less alcohol in it?

Yes.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah.

I thought it was like less calories or something.

It's supposed to be less calories.

But

Nichelle fucking

was a rock god as, what was that?

Long live rock by the Who came on.

And he was channeling Keith Moon.

Took his shirt off?

He didn't take his shirt off.

Only the 50-year-old ladies in the audience could take their shirts off.

They had to.

But Gino could take his shirt off.

Fuck yes.

He was the only one that could take his shirt off.

But I didn't think he wanted to fucking put any pressure on the rest of the shit.

Okay, fair.

Good.

That's a good man.

That's a good man.

But yeah, he was on fucking fire.

Oh, look.

I cannot believe that he has waited so long to pick up the sticks again after, you know, it's been so, he has so much talent.

He outshined a lot of members of the band.

And I was like, yeah, I was like, I feel they might get a little intimidated.

At his prowess on the skins.

Yeah.

Wow.

Because he was adding those little flourishes.

I mean, potato skins.

I know you're so your mouth.

I know your mouth started watering.

I'll take a basket.

More skins.

More skirts.

I feel your mouth quiver when I said skins.

You start watering.

Yeah, unbelievable, though.

They played.

He's supposed to go in at 9.30.

We get there at 9.40.

They're already playing.

And they didn't stop till 12.30?

Yeah.

I mean, they just played for almost three hours straight.

And you stayed the whole time?

Hell yeah, man.

All right.

Loves to rocking, man.

Chicks chicks with his shirt might come off.

You don't know.

Oh, yeah.

Waltz spotted her getting up on the top of the bench.

Yeah.

He's like, oh, look at this.

Look at this.

I was stunned.

I was like, the mixture of alcohol and live music, I think,

they become...

It's intoxicating.

Bands become snake charmers.

I think that's the only reason bands exist.

I mean, how could this be new information?

I had never seen it up close like this.

Especially given that singer.

The singer was not that powerful.

I threw my fucking boxers out in the shelf.

I was so fucking amped up.

Landed right on his fucking

tramboline, whatever the fuck that thing is.

Simple

tramboline.

But Ginnen was dancing.

Everybody was dancing.

Who went?

Just Satui?

Yeah.

We asked Bride ago.

You know, he bailed on us, though.

Well, I said I was going to go.

Take it out, Deckland.

Take it out.

That a stomachache, right?

Of course.

You know the way that goes.

Good time, though?

It was great.

It was great.

You know, it was exactly.

Three hours is a long time.

That is how many movies.

Yeah.

But at least it was music I recognized.

You know, classic rock.

It was anything you hear on 104.3.

Anything you hear.

You love it, man.

Yeah.

It was awesome.

All right.

He's got the skills to pay the bills.

I don't know.

I don't know how those bills are paid, though, on a bar band.

I don't know what they're making.

I see his house.

I don't think those skills are paying the bills.

He's got a side job to pay the bills.

All right.

I want to talk about something here.

All right.

I want to talk.

And Jimmy and Michelle, you listen.

Well, Michelle, you don't listen.

So Jimmy, you listen up.

Well,

we're running into an ad right here.

Is this a lead into an ad?

Can I just say this before you read the ad?

I got a lot of emails about people, a lot of longtime listeners are

feeling betrayed by TSD because of the ad reads.

What's wrong with that?

Because we're not taking

the piss out of the sponsors anymore.

They say, we turned our back for the money.

Yeah, you're right.

Can I read it now?

All right, that's settled.

Because let me explain something to the people who like us to take the piss out of the advertisers.

If we do that, they don't pay.

But we we used to not care about that.

They actually mentioned that in the email.

They're like, I love that you guys had that rebel attitude that you didn't care if you didn't get paid for your ad read.

Right, well, you fucking

fucking go to work then, and you tell me if you don't care if you get paid.

The audience mattered more than the ad read, they said.

Yeah, back in the day when we were making shit for ads and we hardly had any.

Yeah, we would fuck around with them.

I can't convince you to like to go full nuclear on this ad kit.

No, who is it's Adam and Eve?

It's Adam and Eve.

They don't care.

Do they sexiest?

They sell fucking sex toys.

I know.

Do they really care?

If you want to mock them while I'm rating it, you go ahead.

I would think if anyone likes it, fuck it's them.

The only thing I wanted to respond to the guy didn't respond to him, though, was we almost fucking literally got sued by Burrow for what we said.

Right.

That really scared us off fucking taking the piss out of the sponsors.

When they threatened a lawsuit,

you don't know that we're pussies by now.

When they were lobbying the threats that they were going to take us to court over what we said on the burrow ad, that's when I was like, hey, maybe we went too far.

Right.

Yeah, maybe you're right.

All right, let's do it.

Let's give it Adam and Eve, Adam and Ed.

Adam and Eve a straight.

Yeah, the respect they deserve.

And come on, we're talking about sex.

Who's not interested?

Just when you hear sex immediately, you should perk up.

I'm perked?

You're perked.

Look at me.

Who wants to start having better sex immediately?

Jimmy the hair guy and Michelle Abby.

Oh, yeah.

Now that they're getting married, they got to start introducing all kinds of new things to keep it fresh and new.

That's it.

Oh, I think I got a feeling those guys keep it fucking real fresh.

Yeah.

They're going to fucking gay camp, right?

That's what they called it.

It is.

Well, they call it John Waters camp.

I called it gay camp.

Oh, that was your

real new deal.

That was you.

Everybody in the room was calling it that.

So I assumed it was.

That was the legitimate name of the camp you went to.

No, no, it's John Waters camp.

But if there's a lot of, there's a lot of penises and camp imagery.

I think, I mean, if Jimmy, if anybody in TSD town is up for any exploration with him and his girl, it's Jimmy.

He is going to do anything that she wants to do, I think.

He'll take a dick here and there.

No problem.

Jimmy and Hammond.

Oh,

I don't know if I'll do that.

I don't want to watch you suck it.

I don't know.

Look at him in the eyes.

She's requesting this?

She wants oak.

Yeah, this is what she wants.

Adam and Eve's offering 50% off just about any item plus free shipping, which includes rush processing and more than that.

She's going to raise that image, though, once that happens.

So, if you want, if she says, I want to see you looking at the fire man, no, especially since you'll be videoing it, probably.

This is fuck another video on that YouTube channel and about that.

Chuck, Chuck, we need you to film something.

Walt, they need you to be there.

Why am I going to be there?

You break this Cape Horn.

That's why it works.

More than that, Adam and Eve want to make your life easy.

They offer discreet shipping as

your privacy is a free shipping.

Okay, that doesn't make sense.

They offer free shipping and rush processing on your entire order.

And it doesn't matter how much you spend or what you buy.

All will be packaged and sent discreetly for fast.

Brian Johnson, he's butchering the Agreed on purpose.

Yeah, fucking roll.

As a little fucking message to all those out there who are like, we want you to fucking take the piss out.

We won't take the piss out.

But then he's like winking to the fucking audience.

He stumbles and

that's on purpose, people.

People are like, you.

People are like, are you sure it's just that he can't read?

The marble mouth motherfucker.

So don't wait.

Better sex is just a click away.

That's 50% off one item.

Free shipping with rush processing.

Bring more pleasure and satisfaction into your bedroom.

Just go to adamandeve.com and select any one item.

It could be an adventurous new toy or anything you desire.

Just enter code offer TESD at checkout.

That's T-E-S-D.

T-E-S D at adamandeve.com.

This is an exclusive offer specific to the podcast, so be sure to use this code T-E-S-D to get your discount 100% free shipping and get it with Fast with Rush Processing.

That's code TESD.

And now we have

another thing to do kind of with, I know with sex, but you know.

personal grooming.

I don't know.

Did you guys get your forged gold manscaped lawnmower 5.0 Ultra?

Yeah, I started using it.

Did you?

Yeah.

All right.

I took it to Jersey coin in gold.

I thought it was real gold.

How much did you get for it?

How much when you melt this down?

The latest masterpiece from Manscaped is the lawnmower 5.0 Ultra in forged gold.

Welcome to the golden era of grooming where precision, luxury, and performance meet.

In a world where grooming tools come and go, Manscaped is setting the gold standard with a special edition trimmer if you want to make your grooming routine a statement of sophistication style this is the tool you need just a quick psa though there are limited quantities available in this color so you got to act fast oh shit we got the collectible lawnmowers nice yeah

we got the chase fucking bush shavers

Mine was taken away already.

It just came today and it was already taken away by my wife.

She doesn't want you fucking trimming the no, she's like, you already have some.

I don't have any.

Yeah, because I have them too.

That's good, though.

That works out for you, though.

And you were upset that she took it?

No.

No, not at all.

Go ahead, baby.

Are you just trying to fucking try to get an extra one?

Smart man.

Need another one.

Are they listening?

Manscaped?

I don't believe they're listening.

We're not allowed to take the piss out of them.

Yeah, I know, right?

Step into the golden era with the Lawnmower 5.0 Ultra Gold experience, unparalleled precision with the next-gen dual skin safe and blade heads.

One trimmer blade and one foil blade designed for flawless performance.

And these blades aren't just about looks.

They're engineered for excellence.

The updated trimmer blade features longer, wider, and rounded teeth to tackle hair effortlessly, while the foil blade provides a sleek, smooth finish.

First, the updated trimmer blade features longer, wider, and rounded teeth that cut through hair with ease.

And this is where things get interesting.

The foil blade crafted to transcend the boundaries of your typical trim achieved with the trimmer blade.

This foil blade is designed to leave you with a finish that's irresistibly sleek and utterly bare.

Was that in the copy?

This is when things get interesting, or did you just add that?

No, it's in the copy.

It's like, god damn, you're dancing hard.

You were adding this is when things get interesting.

I was like, Jesus.

This is pathetic.

That guy was right.

Company man, it's disgusting.

With the foil blade, you'll achieve a sleek golden touch that's perfect for every occasion, and it's like having two trimmers in one.

Make sure you're always in your golden era without breaking the bank.

And it isn't about just luxury.

It's packed with functionality.

The new LED light,

the new LED light boasts a dual temperature function to illuminate even the trickiest spots while adding a touch of elegance to your grooming routine.

My God, this is so long.

Read it all.

Read it all.

I like your hair if you use Manscaped.

Yeah, this is long.

This is supposed to be in like 60 seconds or something.

I don't see.

The thing is, I don't.

Okay, let me read this, for example.

This is where I blame the

gotta do it proper.

This is where I blame the copywriters.

The trimmer features two buttons on the front that will give multiple options.

The first is the power button to turn the trimmer on and off.

The bottom button controls two features: the travel lock and the LED light.

That's for the fucking instructions.

All right, if you want to hear me give the advertiser some shit, that's for the fucking instructions.

People don't need to know that in an ad read.

It's fucking ridiculous.

Are you supposed to read that?

Are you supposed to read maybe like two of the five?

Let me see.

Nope.

All right.

Well, why don't we skim the code and move on

from this?

All right, if you're part of the OG Manscaped fam, that's them too.

This trimmer is a tribute to the classics, upholding the same features that we've all come to love.

Can't you be so desperate to belong to something that you're like, this is my family?

This is my fam.

I don't know if anybody does.

I don't know if anybody does.

It's like, I bought it, I use it, I love it, it's great, you know?

A rechargeable L-ion battery, RPM technology for top-notch performance, USB-C charging, and a comprehensive three-level battery life indicator.

And the best part is it's still waterproof.

I had so many great jokes, too, for this.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

I'm just biting my tongue here.

Fuck it.

Let's burn it all down.

No, I can't burn it down.

No.

No.

Got to pay those bills.

Join the 10 million men worldwide who trust Manscaped for all their grooming needs and get the special edition lawnmower 5.0 Ultra and forage gold while supplies last.

So to get 20% off plus free shipping with the code TESD at manscaped.com, that's 20% off plus free shipping with the code T-E-S-D at Manscaped.com.

Nice.

Tell them, Steve, Dave.

It's been so long.

I thought it was time to end the show.

Yeah, well, guess what?

I still got two more.

Are we done with the ad at that particular ad?

Could I say something about that?

And they wouldn't hear it?

Or is it totally off limits to even mention?

They probably wouldn't.

I don't think they would hear it.

Isn't it weird how like you, as a kid, you're growing up and you can't wait to get pubes.

And then as soon as you get them them now society's taking yourself off

yeah i hadn't thought about that i never really thought i couldn't wait to get pubes well you did when you were you taking showers in gym class

not really

yeah because you were a little bit past that time yeah so you never took yeah you didn't want to walk into the shower with no pubes you look like uh like you hadn't had your balls hadn't dropped yet you were just like you hadn't gone through puberty yet you were just yeah i never had this before your voice is all high and

all right

like peter brady and everybody would everybody just notices you ain't got no and there was no fucking scaping back then so nobody thought you were fucking had the gold fucking lawnmower you were a little boy dick you just thought you didn't have it you didn't have any fucking yeah what's that what's that uh what's that drug testosterone testosterone yeah you just thought you were testosterone okay well isn't there a difference between all and nothing like there is just keeping it manscaped

like you know not too long and not too short you know just but all in even length i mean yeah it gives the the impression of,

I couldn't wait to fucking get it into the shower and let everybody see that I had fucking, you know,

but then when you got more, didn't you want to

meet us to make it look nice?

Nice, what, bald is nice?

No, no, I'm not saying bald, just trimmed.

Like, you keep it all consistent length.

I don't know.

Yeah, I've never really was one to like, you know, think about like, like, what's your guy's name, Hector?

Hakeem?

It's just like,

I wasn't the, it wasn't something that I gave much thought to growing up, though.

I, I thought, like, having, you know, you got, so you got hair in your nuts, that means you're a man.

You're in the fan.

What are you hairless?

That's what they would say.

You know, that's what the golden is.

No.

If you're hairless was, you're a pussy.

You didn't have no balls.

Okay.

You were a chicken.

Okay.

Yeah.

That's in the 70s when when it was fucking

the greatest time to be alive.

No, I'm just saying.

I'm just saying is now, you know, it's, I think it's okay to be just trimmed, not completely bald, but it's at least to look presentable.

I guess.

We saw a lot of the 70s.

You ever wish you were born just a little bit sooner so you could have experienced more of it?

Like, because we were three when it was 1970.

So, like, our formative years were pretty much the early 80s, like, you know, late 70s into the early 80s.

But yeah, like, I see people who like went to concert, like, oh, only born a couple years before,

you know, and they go to concerts and

Windorf got to see so much amazing shit that we will never get to experience because he was of that perfect age.

Yeah, oh, yeah, I think about it all the time.

I thank God that I grew up in the pocket that I grew up in.

I would hate to be have be,

you know, my formative years be the years we're in now.

Gross,

that would be horrible.

I know, It would just be fucking miserable.

Yeah.

I think you'd be a totally different person, though, too, right?

Yeah.

Everything that's normalized now is awful.

Yeah, it's terrible.

But I think, like, we're actually, it's like, it's the first time because I was slightly different from you guys.

Like, I feel that way about the 90s.

Like, I grew up then.

I loved it, you know, even though I was 14 when they started.

So I had a good chunk of the 80s too.

But, like, to me, like, the 90s were like fucking man.

And we had computers towards the tail end you know what i mean and we had cell phones i didn't have one in 2001 so i got through those years i think i was like the last generation through the door before all the fucking shit started did you have a pager i had a pager okay i had a pager towards the end

of stuff oh yeah what happened i'm loving that crazy

this is the greatest fucking story on the planet right what happened I guess Hezbollah, they issued pagers.

I don't know why they're still using pagers.

Where was it, Lebanon?

They were getting tracked.

They felt they were getting tracked by cell phones and smartphones and stuff.

So they decided to switch to pagers.

You can track pages, can't you?

No, not

as

if it's sending back a message, but I guess maybe these were receive-only.

But they're less trackable than an iPhone.

Sure, I understand.

So they issued them these pagers, and somehow Israel was able to make 2,000 plus of them explode all at the same time.

Are you kidding me?

So there's videos of people shopping, and then you just see

this huge explosion come out of their little testimony.

They just get blown off because they're in their pockets.

But how?

Wait, there's no explosives in them?

Supposedly.

Trump can tell you, get out of that chair, 148.

Go get some fries.

We were only kidding.

Get back here.

So basically,

supposedly, Iran gave them the beepers, and they had packed it with explosives in case they were captured.

They could detonate it on someone.

And Israel found out that they were

impacted with explosives.

Boobs and they blow up.

And Israel was like, okay.

And they took out like 2,000 people today or something, like blowing up tons of balls.

Yeah.

There's videos everywhere online.

It's weird, though, because like some of the explosions are in public.

It's like, imagine if you're at a grocery store, you're picking out some fucking produce, and all of a sudden some dude's fucking balls explode right near you.

Oh my god.

Like there were people, like I saw the video I saw, like people are jumping back.

There's little kids around.

Yeah, so I was about to say, like, what if they're driving and then they run into like a school?

It seems derelict.

It seems a little out there, yeah.

It seems like fucking Q shit from James Bond.

Hey, don't get me wrong, points for style, 100%.

Like, yeah, that's that's pretty crazy.

Like, dude,

wow, yeah, that's some fucking wacky shit.

This is, yeah, this is the footage that I saw.

Oh,

dude.

Almost 3,000 Hezbollah members and paramedics have been injured after their pagers exploded.

Poor paramedics.

I mean, this dude is on the ground.

People are looking at him like, what the fuck?

Holy shit.

Wow.

What a fucking funny idea, though.

Like, if you're not going to hurt, if there's not going to be any, like,

collateral damage.

People are bumping into each other, running away.

Like, his balls just blew up.

And Israel claimed it.

I would have just been like, we didn't do nothing.

Yeah.

An MP's son and one girl are almost also among eight people who have died.

What's the name of their secret service?

Massad.

Yeah, they don't fuck with them, man.

They are fucking...

They're the fucking shadow force.

Yeah, you don't want to fuck them up.

So they're not like our secret service.

We promise you work out together.

Oh, that's right.

That's right.

Can't talk about that.

Do we have another rad?

There's another rad.

We got to get to it.

We have three more, right?

At least two.

Yeah, at least two.

Q,

are you associated, or do you know James Charles by any chance?

Do you know who that is?

The cheer, the guy made cheers?

No, no, that's Les Charles, I think.

Les Charles?

Okay.

James Charles is a 25-year-old YouTuber guy who's, I guess he's, I assume he's gay.

He's super into like doing makeup and stuff, and he's very, he's very popular.

He has like 15 million,

but no, I don't know.

You know, okay.

Yeah.

Because Sage told me today her plan was to go to her mom's this weekend and hang out.

And then the next weekend, she wants to go see James Charles.

Like her mind works in a way that I'm like.

Like this is show I can go see?

Or no, we could just go meet him.

We can go hang out with him.

Oh, yeah.

You can't make that happen?

I don't think I can.

That's why I'm going the queue.

Oh.

I'll keep my radar up.

I'll look.

I'll see what we got.

Maybe we got the same agency or something.

Could be.

50 million.

She loves it.

She dies that.

She loves that.

And

spy ninjas.

I don't know if you've ever heard of spy ninjas.

They're in Vegas and they drive Teslas.

I guess it's some kind of like

bad guys versus good guys, like

YouTube video series.

No.

It's not stunts.

I think they do some stunts.

In Vegas.

They live in Vegas, yeah.

And that's why Sage wants to go back to Las Vegas now.

Because in her mind, she's going to run into them.

Right, right, right.

You know?

Well, I'm going to Vegas tomorrow.

I'll keep my eyes open.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is that where you're going for 11 days, you son of a bitch?

And Los Angeles.

Okay.

Yeah.

I got a charity thing in Vegas, and then I go to LA, but for work, nothing fun.

This is the person?

Okay.

That's him.

She is obsessed with him.

She does her makeup and she watches him.

23.9

million subscribers.

2 million subscribers, yeah.

54 million views on that thing.

Wow.

On that video that we're watching.

This is 1.7 million.

It was 1.7 million.

Could you, like, in a guy to reach out to him, maybe ask about some eyelinering tips?

I could.

Oh, yeah.

That's right.

I could.

I could see if I could do that.

I forgot.

What joke?

I missed it.

Because you said that guy accused you of wearing eyeliner.

Oh, yeah.

Shit, I thought I fucking denied that to death.

Yeah, well, yeah, fuck yeah.

These pretty eyes.

That is

a dude.

That's a dude.

That's a very pretty guy.

That's a dude.

Yeah.

All right.

Fucking welcome to America.

All right, good.

Hi, sisters.

I'm James Charles.

But even that picture of

is made to look like a woman.

Yeah.

Well, I think, I mean, he's gay for sure, so I think that, you know, it's one of those like effeminate.

Yeah, you know, just being effeminate.

All right.

I think I can say that.

I'm not sure.

Let's talk about Trump.

Let's talk about Trump, please.

Or do another ad.

You're right.

Yeah.

Got a bail.

So all for two, Keel.

Yeah.

All for two.

I mean,

crazy.

Trump trying to trying to assassination attempts.

Oh, yeah.

You think there'll be a third?

Yeah.

Why not?

They're going to Vegas.

They are taking odds now.

Oh, really?

You could actually bet if there'll be a third attempt now.

I mean, geez,

election, it seems like the dam has broken.

So, yeah, I would

have got big bucks on there'll be a third attempt.

Fuck, man, I don't want to because I don't.

I hope not, but you probably.

It's pretty far.

All right, you could take this off, get him.

You don't have to keep playing this.

Thank you.

You cannot keep his mind on anything but

James Charles.

That is a very pretty, pretty boy.

I like it.

Yeah, I mean, fucking, it's this, that's it now.

I mean, it's, I think it can only go so long before someone takes a shot at Harris.

Like, that's just where we're at.

We're in a tit-for-tat society, man.

Like, I hope nothing happens.

That's a, that's a, that's a scary prospect to live in a time where you think, you know, like multiple people.

You just assume that the other side now is going to have.

That's, you know, it's sad.

Yeah.

That's the way we have to think

in America in 2024.

Yeah, especially because, like, traditionally, aren't all like the,

I don't want to say gun nuts, but aren't all the gun fans like on Trump's side?

Pretty much, yeah.

So, right now, this is just like rogue operatives from the other side doing that.

So, but you piss off the gun guy.

I mean, there's a stock.

You know what I mean?

And a lot of people are crazy out there.

So, who knows?

Man, fucking scary.

I was so surprised to see that they let this guy wander around for 12 hours on the golf course.

Like he's unnoticed.

Yeah.

Is that what happened?

I just saw the headline.

Yeah, he was, I guess he went there, and then they saw him before he got to take a shot.

They shot at him.

He took off and then ended up a county away or something like that, I believe.

I think so.

I think that's a story I read.

Yeah.

I mean, if you're Trump, what do you do?

What do you do?

You stop counting on the Secret Service.

Yeah, right.

You got to hire your own.

You got to just keep bobbing and weaving wherever you want.

Like, Like, remember that Chris Rockpit where he says he's going to get a Mexican vice president.

He's just going to be dodging all over the place and shit.

Yeah, I guess, man.

That's scary, dude.

What are you going to do?

But it happens every few years, right?

Like, somebody's got to get shot at in America every few years.

Who was the last?

I mean, Reagan got shot.

Yeah.

Reagan got shot.

Ford, they tried to kill him twice, right?

Somewhere.

Really?

Didn't somebody go after Ford?

Yeah, it was

somebody from the Manson family, Squeaky From, was that it?

Or somebody else?

Yeah.

No, it was a different lady.

I can't remember her name.

She got a guy who's a history Kennedys.

How many people try Googling just like we would?

Squeaky From Squeaky.

Squeaky Limit Fromm.

Right.

So it happens.

You know, it does happen, but you don't like to see it.

Sometimes you get put in a wheelchair.

Who got put in?

Roosevelt, right?

Didn't he get put in a wheelchair from a bullet?

No, I thought it was polio.

Oh, is that polio?

Yeah, yeah.

Thank you for fact-checking.

I thought he got shot up until this very moment.

No, no, no.

Polio.

Polio got him.

Lincoln, you're thinking about Lincoln?

Maybe I'm thinking about Lincoln, yeah.

But he wasn't in a wheelchair.

Is there anybody else?

Let me look.

What?

Shot?

Yeah, oh, sure.

There was a president who was only president for like a week or something, right?

And he got shot?

Harrison died of the flu.

Yeah.

McKinley was shot.

Sounds like a drunk.

I was going to say, didn't you do drunk history on the guy when he they went out?

He was on a metal bed and he was using the metal.

Dr.

Doctor was the guy's name.

And they were trying to find the bullet, and the metal detector was picking up the bed.

Yeah, something like that.

I don't know.

I was drunk, so I don't remember.

I don't know.

I don't know what you want from me with this shit.

What are we going to talk about?

We're going to get Walt Moore angry emails.

Garfield, President Garfield.

President Garfield.

I will say, you know,

the t-shirts in Florida are phenomenal.

Like, there's some real comedians working in the t-shirt industry in Florida.

The double middle finger.

It's Trump giving double middle finger with like sunglasses with the American flag on it, and it said, missed me.

That is fun shit, man.

That's pretty funny.

Well, did your daughters ever, did you ever have issues with your daughters not wanting to go to school?

Yes.

And it was for one of the most unusual reasons.

My oldest daughter, Caitlin,

literally, I know I've said this and nobody believes me, but she really has never been sick.

She never got sick, never had to miss school for being sick.

So towards the end of the year, every year, she would make a big stink about like she wanted to stay home from school so she wouldn't get perfect attendance because only nerds got perfect attendance.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

And I sided with her.

I was like, right, so I said to my wife, yeah, well, I mean, this is a valid reason.

I don't want my daughter to be a nerd.

Flaming is a nerd.

You You didn't think to be like, it doesn't make you nerdy.

It makes you

aware.

You get called in front of everybody to get the perfect attention.

Oh, you have to get the award?

Yeah, she would have to go up in front of the gym, would call everybody in the gym.

Yeah, fucking get her.

I ain't having that.

Yeah, okay, I agree with you then.

Yeah, I remember my wife put her foot down and she sent her, and I called in a bomb threat to the school.

So she didn't get perfect attendance.

I didn't think for my baby.

Oh, you know, I I have a story.

Speaking of bomb threats, there was a guy.

Now, this is not your usual school shooter.

This is a gym teacher down in, where is, say,

screwball gym teacher threatens to shoot third graders and menacingly says he only has six bullets.

A Louisiana gym teacher threatened to shoot his third grade class, warning students that some would not survive, though he didn't have enough bullets for all of them.

Robert Mitchum,

70, was arrested last week and charged with terrorizing after allegedly telling the youngsters that he had bullets for his gun and would bring it to school and shoot, and that some of the students would not survive.

And they additionally learned that he said there's too many of y'all to get rid of.

He only had six bullets in his gun.

Who's teaching gym at 70?

Is he Jack Lane?

He said that the reason was that he felt overwhelmed and just wanted the children to settle down and maintain he wasn't threatening them.

Just some of them.

Gym teachers have always been the loose cannons in any school.

Yeah.

You were more likely to get smacked by a gym teacher than anyone else.

Or you'd catch the gym teacher fucking the senior girls.

Yeah.

That's what I heard, too.

Oh, yeah.

Is that what you caught?

You caught that?

Well, they got caught, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, I went to an old penny.

I went to an old boy school, so that wasn't.

There was no price to pay.

Really?

No price?

Kept his job?

Did she had she graduated already?

Or that was it?

I don't know if she graduated, but

there was no penalty.

No fallout.

Yeah, I remember the.

God, you're right.

It was better better in the fucking 70s

told you everybody knew how to fucking even in the 90s we didn't let that shit go down although that's not true i knew a girl in high school who was fucking her teacher so it still went down it wasn't a gym teacher though right yeah

i remember the big thing about the somebody claiming to have seen them together

and that she was topless holding a soccer wall between her tits that was fake i think so i think that was fake news

But at the time, I remember being like, were they at a Nichelle show?

Where was it?

Because that might be something to it.

All right.

Let me knock these out.

I feel bad now.

Now I feel guilty.

Oh, well, I mean, that's why they sent in the emails

to try to guilt us into

losing all our money.

Yeah, let's read four ads, shit on all the advertisers, and not get any money for it.

What the fuck's the point?

Is he supposed to piss off Ryan Reynolds?

I'm not going to piss off Ryan Reynolds.

What are you talking about?

Ryan Reynolds.

Yeah, we're talking about Mint Mobile.

Well,

I love a great deal as much as the next guy, but I'm not going to crawl through a bed of hot coals just to save a few bucks.

Now, Ryan Reynolds has a good sense of humor, though.

He owns this company?

Yes.

He did.

He sold it to T-Mobile.

Probably made more money.

Probably made more money.

Steadpool wouldn't do a straight ad read.

No, he wouldn't.

You're right.

He wouldn't do a funny ad read.

People said they were more inclined to actually try the product if we took the Mickey

out of the sponsor, though.

Now they say they're not trying any of the products because they're straight ad reads.

Really?

At almost a solidarity.

They're like, I'd make a stand.

I'll show TSD.

Yeah, we won't buy Mint Mobile.

Okay.

Do we still get paid?

That's my question.

You know that Mint Money check kicked.

It's Ryan Reynolds money, baby.

You get that.

It's a Daniel Pod.

This is why Brian Reynolds can afford to do this.

You know?

Mint Mobile.

You're easy to get wireless for $15 a month with the purchase of a three-month plan.

And we called him on it.

We said, bullshit, Mint Mobile.

Bullshit, Ryan Reynolds.

You used to be an outlaw, bro.

You used to be an outlaw.

Oh, are you talking about me or Ryan Reynolds?

No.

Dude, I'm Devan Wilder, man.

You used to be the fucking bad boy of podcasting.

I've been cowed.

Gonna need you to turn in your four-color demon fucking opinion without everybody getting fucking pissed off about it.

So fuck all of you.

Fucking idiots.

You don't want Mint Mobile?

You don't want fucking Adam and Eve?

Fucking.

I don't care.

It doesn't matter to me.

All I know is that when I got to pay my mortgage at the end of the fucking month, you won, people.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

You won the war.

Where's your fucking prize, asshole?

So go on, Mint Mobile, go on.

Turns out it's really that easy to get wireless for $15 a month.

The longest part of the process will be the time you spend on holding.

They called you the Bronco that couldn't be saddled.

Really?

They're like, you can't break him.

Don't even try.

Oh, wait, you're going to try with a Mint boba?

Good fucking luck.

Look at him.

Look at him read it straight.

Look at him.

He's been fucking neutered.

He's a pony now that like little kids ride.

I'm led around by some fucking elderly fucking caretaker.

Just give me a carrot.

My back's old.

My back's bobbable.

My back's old.

Mint bobble.

Mint bobble.

Guy leading you around looks like that makeup kit.

Welcome to my world.

Dance, pony, dance.

I want to see how brave and ballsy all these people are at their jobs.

That's what I want to see.

How they're fucking giving the man what for.

I'm going to rename you Buttercow.

It's so true, though.

Imagine them going in one day and being like, y'all going to fucking take it to the man.

yeah yeah let me see that

you send me video of that i'll shit on the next advertiser

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Woo!

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Here's a carry.

What other one have we got?

Okay, we got one more, but I know I can't shit on this advertisement.

Blue Chew?

No.

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Well, I thought batwing isn't a visual thing, right?

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I thought it was actually

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Comfort from the inside out.

Nice.

All right.

Jockstrap.

Jockstrap, did you see anything about the Emmys where Caitlin Olson and Rob McKellaheny, however, pronounce his name?

Probably the Ovis Sunny guys?

Probably the Olympic guys.

They were giving

an award at the Emmys and they compared Meryl Streep to a jockstrap, jokingly.

In what way?

I don't know.

I can't remember the exact context, but

they were talking about

it's comfortable and it fits and blah, blah, blah.

Whatever they were saying.

Rob McKellaheny was like, oh, it sounds like you're comparing Meryl Streep to a jockstrap.

And she kind of giggled, but evidently it was very divisive on

social media.

Yeah.

Well, that's disrespectful, though.

It's the Emmys.

I mean, the whole thing is about

taking jabs at people.

I thought that was the golden globes.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

You're right.

Oh, the Emmys.

Yeah, you're right.

They take themselves very seriously.

But you invite the always sunny guys.

You're going to get the Iris, you know.

But what did Meryl Streep do to deserve that?

I think.

Always murders in the building, apparently.

Yeah, I think she was up for Murders in the Building.

Only Murders in the Building.

Great show, by the way.

Oh, it's so fucking good.

Yeah.

So I don't know.

Is that going too far?

Yeah.

Comparing somebody to a jockstrap.

Yeah.

You're there.

You don't expect that, you know, to be

insulted like that on the big stage and the world stage.

Can't laugh it off.

I can't show your human side and just be like, for a minute, let your hair down and not be like, oh, look how important I am.

She's an actress.

Oh, that's true.

That's true.

I had to consider that.

She's an Academy Award-winning actress, probably.

She's a great actress.

There's no denying it.

But she's so great that I think at this point, if somebody's like, hey, you're comparing her to a jockstrap, you could take that strap.

If they were like, she's got a face like a jockstrap, it might be a little bit like, eh, I don't know, guys, if that's the way you want to go with Meryl Streep.

Is there some sort of innuendo that she's like she's loose or something?

That she's been around the block, as they say.

I will say that the OE Sunday guys have made me laugh way more in my life than Meryl Streep, so I'll probably lean with them when it comes to comedy.

To be fair to Meryl.

Yeah.

Oh, I'd love to.

I love,

she's not a comedic actress.

She is a dramatic actress.

Okay, here's the exact thing they said, Q.

Okay.

So Rob says, ladies and gentlemen, we are here to honor the comedic performances that hold everything in place.

They show crucial support when it's really needed.

And then Caitlin Olson jumped in and said,

what you're describing sounds very much like a jockstrap.

So the girl from fucking Full House has the balls to say go.

Oh, not from Full House, from Olympia, Philadelphia.

Wasn't the Olson twins?

No, that's a different, totally different Olsen twins.

But were they even referring to them?

They just...

That wasn't even a direct reference to.

It gets to it.

Oh, there's more.

No, it doesn't, Mikela Henney said.

These roles make sure that everything stays secure.

Without this support, the whole package just falls apart.

All right, that does sound like a jockstrap.

And then Caitlin Olson said, are you calling Meryl Streep a jockstrap?

And then the camera cut to Streep.

As Mikelaheny said, no, I'm so sorry, Meryl.

And Streep mouthed, oh, God, pretending to be upset.

I mean, it's a bit.

It's not.

It's just a bit.

Yeah, that's the word.

Fans on social media were divided about the joke.

Who's

shocking stuff?

Yeah.

Shocking.

Who says this?

I don't know who wrote the Emmy Awards tonight, but the dialogue is so cringe.

They just compared Meryl Street to a jockstrap.

Yeah, it's that bad.

One viewer stated on X, formerly Twitter.

We're so fucking upset about Meryl Streop.

Can you imagine a life

in which you're fucking upset enough?

If you're upset at all that they call Meryl Stroop a Meryl Strupa jockstrap, let alone go on to fucking Twitter and post about it.

What kind of fucking loser asshole are you?

Opinion.

Look, I have a fucking empty life.

It's not even that empty.

It's not that empty.

Politicians are getting shot at, but you're more upset than someone called Meryl Strupa jockstrap.

That's a fucking world.

That's 2024.

It's kind of wild.

Yeah.

I thought you had two jockstrap stories, though.

No, just the one, unfortunately.

Like a dig for more.

It's been a a slow week.

Right now, this is all that's coming up.

You got your fire up, though.

You have to be there.

You did.

I saw you.

I got fired in his belly in a while.

Oh, my God.

I saw the light in your eyes come back.

It's been fucking.

It's been a while since I got a good yell in this fucking show.

Nice.

It was good to see.

It was good to see.

And I think people appreciate it.

It was something as meaningless as a Meryl Streep joke, too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Fuck.

He's back.

He's back, Davey.

Here I am.

LeBron goes back.

You can love him again, people.

Tell him, Steve, Dave.