#564: Son of the Soil

They act like I went and fucked every one of their moms in the ass.

It's all chic at Teller Swift concerts.

That's all you say.

You want to be the ironic guy.

No, I like irony.

And you want to be the guy that's like, you know, the.

They're catchy, they're poppy.

I like them.

Yeah.

Tell them, Steve, Dave.

Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave.

I'm here with Walt.

Chillo.

There is no BQ.

We were doing this sometime in the past.

This is one of those emergency episodes when me and you can't get together or Q can't come down.

This is going to be the episode that we put out there.

Break the glass episode.

Yep, emergency.

We got some people here with us today, though.

We got Smod Fan.

Hello.

Now, if we have any questions about Tell him Steve Dave, he's the guy to ask.

Do you still go by that?

Or do people call you curator, or do they still call you a smod fan?

I mean, the tag is still smod fan, but I go by curator.

Curator?

Okay.

I apologize.

That's your, you legally changed that, right?

On your birth certificate.

And his driver's license.

I'm like, Seal, I got one name, curator.

And we have another guy here who hasn't been in in some time, and I think he will probably leave people asking, like, couldn't you get Nelly?

Why are we listening to this guy?

Brian Maxwell.

Hello.

Ryan Maxwell.

Now, Maxwell, you're a polarizing figure in Tell Em Steve Dave Town.

There are people who love you, and then there are people who don't love you.

Can confirm.

Where do you see most of your hate coming from?

Do you go to Reddit?

Do you go to Reddit and read it?

Do you see it on Twitter?

Yeah, like, I don't.

yeah, it's on Reddit.

Twitter is more

and don't get me wrong, so Twitter's like the complete opposite.

I can't do anything wrong on Twitter, even if I was like an asshole, they would be like, hey, man, if you were, we, we knew you were having, I'm so glad I brought you, well, you brought me, shout out, um, uh, but like, and I don't think there's a lot of people on Reddit who in the right moment will absolutely like their voice will be louder than the people who like, and it's not even like, I don't like you.

It's like hateful shit that like, like, I know they say words don't matter.

They fucking do.

The shit hurts me.

So I'm just not going to read it anymore.

I don't go to Reddit anymore because it's like these people, but like

it'll, something will be said, and I'll get private messages or DMs or people on Twitter will go, yo, I saw this thing on Reddit.

I love you.

And

now I feel like I'm calling those people.

It does bother me a little bit that they come to me outside of that place where I'm being like

bashed or whatever.

Because maybe that's too harsh of a term.

I don't want to make them mad.

Because Reddit's

Reddit's shit out.

Reddit, Reddit.

Man, I'm so happy and living a great life.

Reddit's so fun.

But I do wish sometimes that

the majority of the people who do enjoy the one time every fucking year and a half that I show up to do one of the 585 episodes of this goddamn thing, that they wouldn't feel the need to like DM me and go, well, I hope your fucking kids die.

You ruined my life.

I'm like, I don't think I ruined your life, but maybe I did.

And if I did, Reddit, I'm sorry.

Why do you think that is, Kara?

Why are there some listeners who are so willing to say such heinous things?

Yeah, why can't they all be loving like you?

Yeah, why aren't they cool like you?

People don't like the thing that they love being being changed.

People don't like, they almost get imposter syndrome where some other person is on there and that should be me.

I've never heard of that before.

So some people will say that about the curator then.

Why the fuck is he?

I mean, nobody

know why you're here.

No, no.

You know more than I would, I would say he's going to do so much better than me.

They're not wrong.

And I was like, fuck them dying of fire.

The problem is knowledge doesn't make me interesting, though.

No, but you're a super fan.

And I remember when Stern, you know, would have people on that like knew a fuck ton about the Stern show.

It was always interesting.

So, like, you, Groupie, I would say,

those are, you guys are the two that come to my mind when I think like these guys are encyclopedias.

They know far more than I do about the show.

They have far less time than everybody else that listens.

So, did you feel like how hard was it for you not to run to the internet then when Bonnet Heads came out and bash us?

Or did you under a soccer count?

Like,

or did you just go, like, hey, you know what?

500 and some odd episodes.

You know, maybe it's okay for them to do one that they really wanted to do.

That was one of those ones where I listen and I'm like, oh, okay, that was cool.

And, you know, it's like some pods that aren't directly in my wheelhouse that I'll listen once or twice, and I was like, oh, that's cool.

All right.

And then I go on and I see, like, whoa, what the hell is...

And I'm like, I didn't hear it then.

Let me re-listen to this because I must have missed something.

That sounded like a normal episode.

They act like I went and fucked every one of their moms in the ass.

And I go to relist and I'm like, maybe I missed something.

Because to me, it just seemed like a normal episode, nothing too special.

And I relist and I'm like, what the fuck is happening?

And

you know, there's going to be some.

We're going to call you out, but like, yeah, he's going to say that because he wants to sit at that table and be able to record on a TSD.

He's like, I should be there.

I'm going to speak truth to power.

Fuck.

I mean, it's clearly not that hard to get a spot at this table.

Just like literally dedicate a

decade of your fucking life to knowing everything except for the names of people who have appeared on the show.

He doesn't know names, fuck names.

But like, we're riding up here and I'm catching up on a lot of the Patreon stuff.

And I get to the thing where he's doing his like knowledge thing with Jimmy the hair guy.

And I would just turn to him and go, why the fuck do you know that?

Why?

And he was so mad.

Even now, he was fucking there and he's listening back to it.

As we're listening to it again, he was getting so frustrated that he didn't remember the name.

Ah, fuck, why don't I know the names of these?

Like, you know, you fucking don't know it.

And it would come up.

He's like, I can't believe I didn't know that.

I feel you, man.

Like, there are many times when I'm in a conversation with somebody about a TV show or a movie from a while back, and I'll be like, and it was,

and I can't fucking remember.

I couldn't remember David Mammet's name the other day with Glen Gary Glenn Ross.

Names are hard.

Stories are easy.

And then I'm like, I'm getting old.

I'm getting old.

I'm old.

Getting old.

I'm already old.

You're not wrong.

Yeah.

I feel it, man.

I can hardly be a little bit more.

I'm glad you invited me on.

How old is Maxwell now?

I'm 43.

I turned 43 May 27th.

So that's like a couple weeks ago, I think.

Traumatizing to hit the Big 4-0?

Nah.

No.

It was traumatizing to be

childhood to 30.

Traumatizing.

The last, like, 30 to 43 is like 13 years of learning how to be a human being and how to be happy.

And I don't think I'm completely there yet, like, but

you're better.

I think at 43, like I'm better today than I was yesterday.

I'm getting to participate in a lot of things with people that are above sort of my pay grade and intelligence.

And like on any given day, I could be sitting in a room with a five-star general who's like that one time I was with George.

Or a Baron.

Well, yeah, and I mean, I'm talking a lot now, so this is going to be, they're going to be like, but he was talking.

well, I really am.

We should put a timer on him.

I know.

Get him at your second job.

But it's like,

I don't know, man.

I'm nervous of upsetting people, especially about things they're passionate about.

Like, I don't want people who are fans of the Dallas Cowboys or Taylor Swift to be mad at me because

it's not that big a deal.

Is it BTS?

The Korean self-orean puppy.

Oh, you don't want to fuck with me.

No, like, you're insane.

I don't want gun people to be mad at me.

I have opinions.

They're worse than that.

I don't need to know them.

Who?

The BTS people?

Yeah, fuck you.

Yeah, they'll fuck up your world more than anonymous characters.

I saw the other day that somebody, it was like Chris Hemsworth or something, or Chris Edwards or somebody.

I was about to say that.

Yeah,

they posted something on Twitter, and it's like, hey, if you want to check out these BTS scenes, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, from whatever movie he was in.

Behind the scenes?

Yes.

And they went to him and they're like, hey, stop using our acronym or hashtag or whatever else.

Or else.

Yeah.

These are a bunch of stupid fucking kids who like, they don't know what BTS stands for.

So they're like, who the fuck is this guy?

It was a recent writing.

I read there's Taylor Swift fans.

And it wasn't even a thing that dude said that was like all that out of.

He's like, I wish it was easier to get Taylor Swift tickets.

And they were like, oh, no, you did not put her name in your mouth.

And they are, dude, they're.

They are vicious online, dog.

They're sweet in person, but I met a, or I know a lady.

It's one of Sage's former paras, you know, her assistant teacher, whatever, who got Taylor Swift tickets and good tickets.

She said she was online for 12 hours waiting for these tickets.

When she went to buy them, it kicked her off.

So she went right back on and she got five tickets like right by the stage on the side for 60 bucks each.

And I was like, how the fuck did you not sell them?

I mean, you're talking a minimum of five grand each.

Oh, I know, way way more.

Probably more.

You're talking five grand in the upper decks.

Like, that's in the 300s at the New Jersey Jets.

That's not down low.

Side of the stage, Taylor Swift.

Because the thing is,

there's a ton of rich people who have an unlimited amount of money.

Like, they're buying golf.

People have so much money now.

They're like, we would like to own the PGA.

And they're like, fuck it.

Yes, you have that much money.

There are 500 people who will bid way more money than should ever be spent on anything on those tickets because it doesn't exist anywhere else.

There's no other comparative price point to a stage-side Taylor Swift ticket.

She's very much Michael Jackson, the Beatles, whoever.

I don't know.

Like, was there another?

Stop it, man.

I don't know.

Those are some.

I know that there's

a.

I can't name one Taylor Swift song, but I can name you a whole bunch of Beatles songs.

I know it right now.

It could be because you you don't listen to Taylor Swift, though.

That could be one of the reasons.

But

I don't know.

To me, that sounds like a, that's a, I just feel like a slight to the Beatles, man.

She just recently, in the middle of a tornado warning, where they postpone the show for like two hours in Nashville, came out after that, like after this huge delay late at night.

She played 39 songs.

It was like a four-hour concert.

Whoa.

No, she doesn't fuck around, dude.

When I say she's Michael Jackson and the Beatles, it's like a real thing.

Yeah, I guess so.

I guess she's this generation's Michael Jackson songs.

Like, they're very adamant to tell you that she writes all her own.

I'm like, dude, every one of them was about a guy she just bowed.

I got to go with.

I didn't mean that.

You can't say shit these days.

When we first started, you could say anything you wanted, pretty much.

It's terrifying.

And now it's like, yeah, like you're second-guessing every single thing you say because there's going to be some asshole out there who's like, oh my God, they said something I didn't like.

Let me take away everything he's he's worked for.

So, guy at home who heard that, who heard him say that you can't say anything anymore, we apologize.

You can say whatever you want.

They're just

going to censor somebody.

I apologize for that.

Did the person who brought the tickets for 60 give you a reason why they didn't sell them?

Because her daughter really wanted to go, and I guess she brought some friends.

The memory was priceless.

Get them showing me prices of $20,000 for similar seats.

If I bought seats for $300,000 and they're like, you can sell them for 100,000, I'd be like, Sage, and they're watching on TV.

100,000.

Yeah, there's five seats.

They're 20,000.

Those have to be like chics, right?

From other.

Oh, yes, 100%.

When I said they're all chics at Teller Swift concerts, that's all you said.

So you have in Nashville.

So

without going too deep, Tennessee does not charge businesses taxes.

That's why we have Amazon centers and Nissan, and like, it's just great.

Great area to live.

Property prices out of the fucking like world.

All of these sort of things.

These people are from right there.

They're in Franklin.

They're in Nashville.

They're the people who casually plop down a million dollars on a home.

And it's also people

who will, like,

they will sell their home to see Taylor Swift play live.

It's like she is transcendent.

Beyonce, I think Beyonce would be one that could sort of like be in that realm.

I don't know anyone else that is.

I'm not hip enough to know.

I just know I'm in Nashville.

So they sell their home and then after the concert, they're like, Well, what do we do now?

Oh, no,

now we're homeless and we're going to go live on this.

Can I stay at your house and show you pictures of me and Taylor?

I caught, look, she's, she wasn't looking at me, but like, that's that's their dream.

That's the that's their life is fulfilled once they see Taylor Swift.

I'm not that person.

I'm just saying that a lot of them exist.

The world's a weird place, blah blah.

There are people who will park up to a mile away just to hear the concert.

They They had to ban tailgating because they expected like 250,000 people to show up to the parking lot in Kansas City to just be in the parking lot.

That's insane.

Through your lifetime, is there any band you would have done that for?

Sold my house?

No, not sold your house.

No, but even gone and hung out in the parking lot.

Sometimes when I go over to the PNC Center, I will see people just like.

Yeah, I mean,

tailgating, I mean, I get that.

I mean, you you want to get there, you want to no, no, no, but never go into the concert, you're saying.

Oh, and only go into the concert.

No, you don't go in.

They expected 250,000 people to stand in the fucking parking lot.

Could they hear the concert then?

I mean, I would imagine.

Yeah, so you can hear it.

When you're at Nissan Stadium, because she plays stadiums, they're not closed.

So it goes out and over.

So you could hear it probably two blocks away, which I'm sure is where those fucking people are.

You can tell them back up 100 feet, they'll back up 100.

Will it last?

Taylor Swift.

Yeah,

everything has its window.

Yes, because

she stays.

Yes, because

I think she's got Madonna's type longevity.

If she.

Well, Madonna ain't selling out arenas now.

Yeah, but as soon as Taylor Swift hits a certain age.

I don't want to say it.

So Taylor Swift has.

You know that they're on to the next thing.

She has a secret weapon.

What's that?

And it doesn't matter if she's older because she's transcendent, right?

Madonna played it wrong.

She had sex with with Dennis Rodman, and no one cared.

I'll cut that out for you.

So, I apologize.

So, Taylor, well, because Dennis Rodman is this controversial figure, right?

No one cares when you break up with Dennis Rodman.

Taylor Swift dates like these

super clean Hollywood guys, right?

The last dude that she dated, I think his name was Matt Healy or some shit like that.

And all I would see is people that were fucking.

Taylor Swift got to be in her mid-30s.

yeah

hook me up look me up and then we'll talk again when she's 55 33 yeah 33 my experience is when you're 55 nobody gives a fuck about Jenny Martin

number one artist at 50 years old still playing stadiums at 50 guaranteed Taylor Swift

guaranteed guaranteed

Madonna

she's gonna break for it she's done dude nobody nobody's gonna write a song about it and look it's the way I think it's shitty that you know that they chew up these artists and spin them out as soon as they go past a certain age.

Her life does seem like it sucks.

But it's fucking reality, man.

It's a cruel, cruel world.

But Madonna's had a number one hit every decade for the last five decades.

Is her concert ticket selling for $100,000?

No, but apparently she's putting herself in the hospital trying to keep up with Taylor Speedles.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, she's come out and see me.

Oh, yeah.

I just got out of ICU.

I was pulling out titties in 2023 on Instagram.

Like, dear guys, come back to Madonna.

Taylor Speaker has the country audience in the world.

Paul McCartney.

Madonna never had.

Nobody cared in the 90s when Paul McCartney was putting out songs.

20 years removed from the Beatles, nobody gave a fuck.

I'm telling you, when she hits a stage, White Zombie was like, they put out a new album.

You wouldn't tell me, you'd be like, holy shit, dude.

The real thing is back.

I'm not saying Rob Zombie's not great, but White Zombie's better because it's White Zombie.

It's not a great thing.

It'd be great for me personally, but the legions of fans that are now

hypnotized by Taylor Swift.

Taylor Swift.

So you're saying that the 13-year-olds will become 30-year-olds and not give a shit about her?

Yes, it's just inevitable.

It's just a circle.

I don't think that's true because, like you said,

families go.

It's 60-year-olds and babies at these things.

You like Taylor?

They rebelled.

They rebelled.

You're fuck up.

That's true.

There's nothing that you like that I like, though.

So?

That's what I'm saying, though.

You want to be the ironic guy.

No, I like it.

And you want to be the guy that's like, you know, the.

They're catchy.

They're poppy.

I like them.

Yeah.

How many CDs you own?

None.

How many CDs?

How do you support her?

I listen to her on the radio.

You steal the music.

I download her music.

No, I listen on the radio.

You used to give her a penny for it.

I listen on the AU.

I don't download any of the music.

I watch her videos on YouTube, so she gets the ad revenue from there.

But I don't own anybody else's CDs.

I haven't bought a CD in like.

I don't know, bro.

I was just caught in the fucking traffic of her massive Michael Jackson concert break.

Like, there's no denying that.

You know, I would force, yeah, but it does.

Nobody can go on like that forever.

Garth Brooks.

Again, again, in the

battle.

He plays fucking stadiums like three times a night in LA whenever he wants.

He's the biggest

planet.

You're out of your mind.

Nobody's talking about it.

Get your damn head out of King Diamond's booty hole and recognize Garth Brooks' greatness.

What about Chris Gaines?

Oh, he is about to make a why you got to bring that up.

We were doing

so well.

Have you heard any any reports of of uh what was his name again garth brooks oh yeah have you been on any country music i have not i'm like you waltz yeah have you heard him like spoken about in like in any kind of relevant terms like yes he's still he's still able to make a living making music but he doesn't have the same

heat that he did when he was younger.

Nobody put on an album right now that would sell more albums than anyone making albums right now.

Why does he have a sound?

Why doesn't they put on a new album then?

Because he didn't have to.

he's garth brooks

stones

they sell out too do you think they're relevant

do you think they're relevant

you what's the last cd

what's the last cd they put out the stones yeah they probably put one out rather recently and nobody gave a fuck uh yeah fuck you was it 2015 was it greatest hits no i think they're they're working on i completely disagreed until you just said that because i honestly can't say that i think the rolling stones are relevant at all and they sell out every time, whenever they want.

I just heard on the radio today they're working on a new album.

I can't wait, right?

Nobody's saying that.

No one gives a shit.

Play fucking chumpin' Jack Flash.

We don't care about the new shit.

Yeah, get him.

What the fuck are you talking about, Taylor Swift?

Are you out of your fucking mind to listen to that?

Once you get the crows.

Taylor Swift will

lose her allure.

The Garth Brooks thing doesn't hold water either because, and I mean, mean, I hate to say it, but it's Nashville.

She's a woman, uh, doesn't matter what you're doing, it's it's way harder for a woman as she ages to stay in an entertainment.

It's horrible.

There's like nine of them, deal.

You're not in your prime.

I know y'all think you're in your prime in your 50s, but you're not.

None of us are.

So, what do you listen to, curator?

What you, what, what do you, what kind of music do you learn?

Let me take a guess.

Let me take a guess.

All right.

Um, hardcore.

I mean, probably not what would be considered hardcore, no.

Like what?

I mean,

Taylor Swift.

What's the definition of hardcore?

There's so many sub-genres now.

I would think punk murder core.

I would say the hardest core that I would go is like

corn, maybe some slipknot.

That's about as hard as I would go.

Fucking poser.

I listen to fucking poser cores.

Clearly.

I mean, it would be 90s and 2000s, kind of.

That's where you cut.

That's where you drove.

That's your cutoff.

That's my era.

That's when I was into music.

and i kind of everybody has that yeah and those people who are fucking going to see

they'll have their cutoff i'm dead already there's no need to hit the fucking body on the ground man

you did no you're not wrong you do get bands like uh

in sync or backstreet boys like when they get together and they go back on tour there are a lot of people who are excited i think it's the relevancy thing that really got it for me because my favorite band ever in the history of ever that's not j roddie waxon in the business corn a band that people would know corn right?

Seen them live 30 times.

They sell out everywhere they go.

No one's talking about fucking corn, just us, just us old guys that no one fucking cares to hear their opinion on music.

Last summer, Mary Beth wanted to go see corn, and I just, I had no interest, man.

Oh, corn's awesome.

Are they?

Oh, yeah.

I always have you scheduled a

corner.

Me and Mary Beth at the corn concert.

Say hi with Sage.

I will fucking go.

I've always said that if you put...

You can go to Kids Bop with Sage if you want.

Hey, hey, I saw the, like, I've seen some children's shows.

So, yeah, if you put Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, and Martin Luther King in a car and you took them on a mile trip and you just played corn, they would beat the shit out of the first person they walk up on when they get out of that car.

Yeah, that's how corn gets it.

They'd be curb stopping up there.

Oh, yeah.

The first person they get out of that car, they're fucking clocking them and knocking them out, and they won't even without saying a word.

Maybe I haven't.

I mean, if that's the case, I haven't given corn enough of a chance, I think.

If we listen to that, oh, it's aggressive.

I love it.

I love it.

It was like 19, 20 years old.

I'm in the car like,

God help a person who peeps at you.

You don't turn quick enough.

You're getting out of that car if you're listening to Corn, right?

Anybody judge that drive by and they're like ever since they legalized that marijuana.

Just for information's sakes, last Rolling Stone album, 2016.

Last Garth Brooks albums, 2020.

Last Corn album, 2022.

All right, so Garth Brooks and Corn, if you're hearing this, get together, set the world on fire, take Taylor Swift down.

Yeah, you've already fucked it up.

If we want to get Taylor Swift tickets, she's not going to fucking hook us up.

We ran a wrestling show that was outside on the night that she had a show in Nashville, and I heckled on a microphone all the people walking by.

They're not about shit in real life.

They're only terrorists online.

Lovely people, though, don't.

Oh, so you were saying shit to them, and they were ignoring you.

They did not.

They didn't care.

Some of them waved and come to the wrestling show.

Oh, no.

As they walked by, I was just like, I know you don't care about us.

Go to your Taylor Swift concert.

Having fun.

I was like, hey, lady in the sun dressed.

Not you guy in the yellow shirt.

Just playing to the crowd, trying to get people to walk.

Because it was a free show downtown.

I was trying to, like a shit.

You're like carnival parking, trying to get people in.

100%.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It works.

So this is what you do.

You promote wrestling shows.

You used to be a wrestler, but then you fucked up your back or something like that, right?

I fucked up my back and then I got in shape.

Like the best shape of my life that I'm not in right now.

You don't say.

Bruh.

Well, I should also preface that 262 pounds, best shape of my life.

But you could physically,

it feels different to have 30 pounds off of you.

Doesn't it feel good to be in shape?

I don't know why I can't maintain it.

Yeah, I was telling him on the way back.

I have new, a new, a whole new set of teeth that I went down to Mexico and got, and I'm able to eat a lot of it.

Yeah, let's not bury that.

I want to hear that story.

I want to hear that story, too.

So, quick, quick, quick.

I went to wrestling school and I made really good friends.

And all of the wrestlers were like, we will make a special spot for you to be a manager.

You never have to take what are called bumps, no one ever hits you.

It's like a thing that doesn't exist.

Um,

and I'm gonna have why did they shield you because of my back.

I took a I took, I was, I was training and I took what's called a shoulder tackle.

And if I do my own thing, if I throw myself backwards and I hit the ground, I'm good.

I could do it on this floor right now, and I would be fine because I'm in control of my own body.

I know where to hit and displace.

It's when people are hitting me and I go sort of off track, I have a fused spinal cord right above my ass.

Is this because of your wrestling?

No, this was work in construction.

So, why did you want to become a wrestler with a fused spine?

Sure.

The only thing my dad ever gave me was a black eye and a love for professional wrestling, and I sort of succeeded in life.

So you ignored the health hazards?

100%.

And then I took this shoulder tackle thing, and for the first time in my life, my wonderful wife, who never gives me shit about she gave you the shoulder tackle?

Anything?

No, that was that's no.

no that's an amazing question no so she looked at me like a way that i like i don't think she's like she was scared and frustrated and like we went through like she would have to drag me to the bathroom because my back was broken for 10 years and then health care happened they did an ammo she weighs like fucking 80 pounds how is she dragging you anywhere she

didn't get you why don't you get a bedpan wheelchair or something Well, I mean, the bathroom's not that much.

She just couldn't fucking move.

Right, but it was still dragging, you know.

I mean, like, I would have been like, well, i couldn't stand up yeah like if i'm saying to mary beth drag me to the bathroom it's not happening here tears

yeah yeah like i'm like so that's like a dead body so like she would like i would have to she would pick me up off the floor and like weekend it burnies me could did she have to do like clean up too no i just couldn't

i could wipe her so my bad would i would lock up in like uh I know the people at home can't see, but in like a half a fetal position.

Like I would go to bend down or I would sneeze and the two discs in my back were completely like exploded.

So my whole body would lock up.

And at first it was like a day and two years in it became a week.

Five years in I could be down a month.

And that's why I stopped working and she had to go get a job because I like I couldn't physically move.

Didn't you have to get a doctor's note to go to this to become a wrestler though?

Fuck no, dude.

It's tennis.

I feel like, you know, those

why would the wrestling federation approve of you without a physical?

So there's only athletic commissions in certain states, and those athletic commissions are wonderful people.

Alabama Athletic Commission, you're great.

They emailed me two days ago.

So athletic commissions for wrestling.

I don't always talk about that.

I guess they're saying that they just rubber stamp you?

So I got a message that said, we know you're going to run a thing.

You have to give us money.

It's like in certain states, it's like the mafia.

In Japan, the Yakuza has, like, they run a lot of the wrestling.

But in a lot of the terror, like, the thing that you saw with all the glass and the blood and the barb, anybody can do that.

You don't need anything special in most of the states.

You just need to own a wrestling ring and have a place for it to happen.

That's like, that's it.

That's it, huh?

And then you can start promoting.

Yes.

Do you remember the episode of the Sopranos when they ran a wrestling federation, apparently?

The Sopranos did?

Yeah.

He says it's like the mafia.

Oh, yeah, that I don't recall.

Strip clubs, that kind of stuff.

Well, you could, if you wanted to, I pay all my taxes, so i'm fine talking about this it's the other scumbags don't do it um you could easily launder money through pro wrestling it would it would be it's like a furniture store like it's like you don't have to it's all cash sales are you giving away trade secrets here no i'm an asshole so i lose money on these shows because i do

it's it's a

government's like we can we don't gotta worry about this guy

i mean i mean it'll actually save on my other taxes.

I'm hoping to make money in the future, but a lot of these places don't pay everyone.

They do what's called work for an opportunity.

And even if it's $10 or $20, I pay everyone that wrestles, everyone.

And that shit adds up.

And then you have to pay a venue.

And there's just, I have to pay a guy to fucking record the thing because I can't record it and edit it.

And it's hard and it's stressful.

But to answer your question, dipping back to the same thing.

I love my wife and kids more than anything, but there's nothing else other than them that is even fucking comparable to how much I love wrestling.

I grew up in Memphis.

I would stand outside for hours to get into the studio, right?

And it's the one thing that I knew I would never be able to do.

And I got in shape and I fucking did it.

And now I have really good friends all over the country in this business who are willing to work for me.

And I've got top workers and we're putting on good shows.

I just need people to come out.

This will be our fourth show coming up.

But you don't actively wrestle anymore, though.

No.

You're really.

We're scheduling your shit opposite Teller Swift concerts.

So

the plan was: we actually had a two-show day, but it's called a bought show for that one.

That's the only show I made money on because someone gave me a budget.

They paid me a certain amount to have that show.

If I make $1,000 worth of people coming in, I'll break even.

It's just we're right at $700, $800, and I just have to eat a couple hundred to get it going.

Nope, nothing successful is easy, and nothing easy is successful.

now do you have a line where like do you do the um do you do the things where you where you jump off like like dangerous heights or do you take the like bulbs and smash them on people's heads or that turkish no

but i have been in situations where i agreed to do that um

well situation it happened once it was going to be in alabama and it was an opportunity to work with like my favorite wrestler and they said are you willing to take a light tube and i was like

Yeah, whatever.

You got hit with a light tube.

No.

So the commissioner of Alabama, wonderful people, they showed up that night.

And

you're not allowed to do a blood spot unless you give them 30 days' notice.

And he usually doesn't show up.

They want you to have blood drawn.

Oh,

it would have been.

So essentially, what would have happened is they would have hit me with it, and then they would have taken the jagged edge and just poked a little hole right here in my forehead, and it would have bled everywhere.

I probably would have taken a couple aspirin before.

Wow, you would have blood out.

You would have did it to work.

But that's not the wrestling you grew up with.

Oh, yeah, Memphis Wrestling.

Fuck yeah, dude.

Not what you watched.

No,

it wouldn't be that.

That's WWE.

That's up north.

Oh, okay.

Memphis wrestling was monsters and fire and Jerry Lawler and Andy Kaufman.

Monsters.

So Jerry Lawler literally brought a box out and went, there was a monster in there.

And it sat there the whole day.

Channel 5, studio wrestling.

They did it in the news studio with the weatherman as the commentator.

And at the end of the fucking show, Frankenstein's monster walked out of the fucking box.

He did Freddy Krueger.

He did fucking the what's the mask dude from Wow, Wild West with fucking IP over there.

It wasn't like really a thing yet.

You could just do whatever you wanted to.

It was essentially the farm league for the Bob Backlund stuff, right?

But it was all from Jerry Lawler's perverted sick mind, but it was awesome, the wrestling side of it.

So it was like entertainment.

So if a woman had her face disfigured by the Mexican cartel and was forced to wear a mask in order to preserve her identity, would you let her wrestle for you?

I don't know.

Is she good at wrestling?

That's a real thing, right?

Yes.

We watched her.

That could be the

lucha, though, or is she just wearing like a.

That could be a, that just could be the character.

We were told that she had her face disfigured by the

cartel.

Some people are really good at this thing we do, and they keep what's called KFABE.

Every so often, I'll see something that happens, and I'll text my buddy, and I'm like, hey, man, like, is this real?

And he's like, I don't know, but I don't think so.

And we do this.

It's people, like, what's called working.

They're working you.

They'll do things that, that, that will make you think, even though you know it's real, you'll go, like, if, if you and Tom fucking pretended to have a fist fight, right?

And you didn't tell anyone that it wasn't real.

It almost happened tonight.

Exactly.

It's fresh on my mind.

If you didn't tell anyone that it wasn't real, everyone would know that you and Tom fist fought.

So that it happens.

You're playing with it because you don't want to be too hammy or too nice.

But the more important question, do I do the dangerous stuff?

I never have because that was training, and I said I'll never do it again to my wife.

This was about a year and a half, two years ago.

Really got into heavy managing, worked a lot.

I stopped doing that.

I wanted to be a promoter, and I only work.

as a manager in matches with this tag team called the Kearneys, who are popular.

They're on WWE, Network, Ring of Honor, all these places, right?

They've been around forever.

One of them is my wrestling trainer.

And the other one was retired for a bit.

I brought them back.

I only come back for that.

I'm getting like actually terrified because I'm terrified of this moment that's going to happen.

One of them got hurt, and we are the champions of like a really popular place.

And they were like, will you do one match and only one match to lose these titles?

It's very important.

So in like

five days, I'm going to have my first wrestling match ever.

Oh, right.

right, in five days from today.

Yeah,

by the time they start this, I'll either be paralyzed or good to go.

All I have to do is take one, I'm going to work like the shitheel gimmick.

I'm going to hide, I'm going to roll out of the ring.

Does this be televised?

Yeah, it'll be on fight TV.

You can see a lot of the stuff I do.

Is it going to be on YouTube?

Is that available on Fubo?

Yes, there's a lot of the stuff I do is on YouTube, too.

It's called New South Pro Wrestling.

And you're going to wrestle.

You're going to get back in the ring after how how many years of not wrestling uh and this will be a while before this comes out or no

it could at least five days right oh

it's gonna be a while yeah so it could be next weekend though could be yeah

then let's hold off because i don't want to make nobody man i don't oh we'll hold off all right as long as it can hold off until

it won't come out within the next five days all right the fourth of july dude be lazy for once so essentially what's going to happen is i'm going to fuck on them right i'm going to throw powder i'm going to grab headlocks when they're down All this that they're never going to touch me the whole time.

What kind of powder?

Until the end.

It's baby powder.

Although I did see a guy use the funnel cake powder once, and he couldn't fucking breathe, and his whole head like candied, like a candied pecan.

It was fucking

like, isn't baby powder dangerous?

Because it gives you cancer.

Cancer and everything, yeah.

I saw commercials, they bamboozled.

It's pro-wrestling.

I'm pretty sure it's a little baby.

I'm going to be dead way before the cancer can take me.

So

I don't know if you know what a stone-cold stunner is.

So essentially, all all-I really hope whoever's listening fucking loves wrestling.

I guarantee you.

There's at least two of them.

So I'm going to essentially have to lean forward and then jump back as high as I can and land on my back.

Easy.

Why, though?

Why don't you just land on your front?

Because that's what that hurts way.

That's the money maker.

Yeah, but your back is already injured, though.

The front bone.

Well, it's but it's only the lower back.

Where I'm going to hit is literally between these shoulder blades.

And when I do, I'm going to.

How much money are you getting for this?

probably $75 to $100?

And you could, but you could do serious damage to your back, right?

No, not the way it's structured.

No, that's always possible.

I take that, yeah.

Well, yes, here's it though.

If he doesn't do it, he's not going to get hurt, but he's got to do it.

He's got to do it.

There's a lot of things that could go wrong, but not on the bump.

It's the running and the dipping.

What's your wrestling name?

Maxwell.

That's it, Maxwell.

Some people call me Max.

Some people call me Mr.

Stuff.

Have you considered Max Wellington?

Yeah, Max Wellington, I was supposed to be there.

After that, maybe.

I fucking know.

Like,

you are a British secret agent who comes to America.

No, I have to.

I don't know what the fuck he's talking about.

Listen to Go Sign Up.

I'm like, I'm desperately trying not to talk about that at all because, like, I don't know when this is coming out.

But yes, Max Wellington.

Talking about living dangerously, though, to segue into.

You went down to Mexico to have some surgery done, right?

Yes.

Now, you

have you heard the horror stories, and I'm sure you must have.

Were you a little worried, though, that you know, going south of the border?

A couple of people literally just got kidnapped

within the past couple months.

Yeah, when he was down there, I texted him because I heard people got kidnapped, and I got worried about him.

Well, I'm not, that's I'm not we even worried so much about kidnapping, I'm worried about like just

a much worse incident than the kidnapping.

So, yes,

that was one thing I was super concerned about.

Okay, I was

you a man without fear or do you have a fear?

No, no, no.

I did a lot of of research.

No, I was a man without options,

um,

literally 18,000,

three weeks in Cancun, two trips.

One of the flights was first class.

Zirconia fucking set.

Did you say 18,000?

18,000 total for both teeth for the for 10 implants and these zirconias.

So just in America, just the teeth that I got on the second, this trip back, just the teeth, 43,000.

Why are they doing this

surgery in like tourist

cities like Cancun?

They're using Safe Burrows' teeth.

Safe Burroughs' teeth are.

That's exactly what you said, right?

When you Google is Mexico safe, you're going to find a lot of things that say yes, here, here, and here.

And then you're going to find out they have what's called hotel zones.

And when you actually get there, you'll find out that the military is literally everywhere just holding assault rifles.

Cartel shit is away from the Cancun hotel zone.

But I was terrified that I was going to get subpar implants.

And like, yes, absolutely.

But I did a lot of research and I found this one place and they had a lot of people who had traveled from America and I went to actual profiles and like they were able to look up the doctors who worked on you.

Yes.

Yeah.

They're actually online.

Yes.

They answer the phone.

They talk to you.

They'll hook you up.

And it's like.

How'd you find them?

Just Google.

I was up late one night

and just depressed because I don't think anyone listening who has bad teeth or teeth that hurt,

it fucking sucks, man.

You don't want people, you never smile.

I realized in the process because she kept saying smile so they could test the line.

Dude, I have no muscles in this part of my face because I haven't smiled in 20 fucking years.

I don't know how to smile.

I just learned how to do that.

Like, that's insane.

Sadhulk music,

name of a memoir.

I never learned how to smile.

I was limited to eating mush and man who couldn't smile.

Hot dogs like that, quality of life needed to happen.

And it was a $250,000 upgrade in America, and it was an $18,000

upgrade in Mexico.

I rolled my D6,

came up six.

They're fucking cleaner, nicer, and more efficient than any dentist I've ever been to in Mississippi.

Yes,

actually trilingual.

They had a lady that was specifically.

She spoke Tennessee.

Well, there was a lady specifically for English speakers.

There was a lady specifically for like German.

So they speak a ton of languages, and that motherfucker was full the whole time I was there.

The biggest thing that terrified me to death was I had to go under anesthesia.

Oh, God.

And I'm like, fuck me, dude.

Mexican anesthesia,

best anesthesia I ever got, bro.

Everything about it was better than here.

How is anesthesia better in Mexico?

So

when I got my anesthesia for my back surgery and for my wisdom teeth surgery, the anesthesiologist didn't explain anything.

They were just like, lean back.

We're going to have you count to 10 in a bit.

And they're just like rolling in like, they went through everything with me.

And they're like, are you comfortable with everything we're doing?

In America, they're real assholes about showing you or giving you your x-rays.

They were like, you don't want these.

You're going to want these for later in case you go somewhere else.

They're amazing.

I'm going to fucking fly back and get all of my maintenance done.

And I could probably afford that in America.

I just kind of want to go see my girl Gabby at the desk.

Dentics Can Coon.

Not even a sponsor.

They're fucking awesome.

Go get your teeth fixed if you can.

Curator, being a super fan, does it bother you that you're now part of one of the worst top 10 episodes of all time?

Do you know what cutting I'm going to have to do?

What is your top 10 episodes, TSD?

Patreon included.

It's generally going to be game show episodes.

I'm always a fan of game shows.

Come on, let's give us, just real quick, give us a top 10.

Top 10!

Top 10!

Top 10!

Top 10!

Top 10!

Do you know what we're talking about?

Nobody else does.

No, I don't know either.

That's an inside joke.

Number 10.

I don't know that I could do them in order, but it'd have to be stuff like Bicentennial Battle.

200.

Pod Olympics.

Okay.

Or, sorry, Pod Wars.

Oh, okay.

Then there's Classics 16.

The one live from Brantford was awesome.

Make and Hayes take up the shit.

These are old fucking, these are like, this is the fucking same thing that Taylor Swift is going to fight.

Oh, shit.

Sorry.

Nobody wants, nobody, they don't care about the new shit.

You didn't let him get number one.

Everything is 5.6 in single digits.

We picked in 2012.

Let me look up what the most recent 10 years ago was the best.

Yeah, I mean, you're saying, you know, we're talking about Taylor Swift changing and the fans' tastes shifting.

Like,

as an objective person listening to Tellum Steve Dave,

I saw just recently somebody's like, oh, I wish we could get an episode where like Bry's riding Dennis and Walt's losing his shit, like that kind of stuff.

Do you find that the show doesn't have the bite it used to?

What are we doing wrong?

No, I mean, honestly, just the other day, the

which one was it?

The Jimmy the Hair Guy episode where you guys did the You Don't Ming Me Flowers.

It's probably some of the hardest I've laughed at Tellum Steve Dave in like a freaking decade.

So it's the youth.

We got to bring the youth in.

Tell them Jimmy.

I don't know if it was Jimmy the Hair Guy.

that's O'Byrne writing for the flower stuff.

Oh, for the flower stuff.

Perfect.

That's patreon.com slash tumbler.

It's unbelievable, and it was so fucking funny.

That was a strong episode.

Oh, we were dying on the way up here.

Yeah, that was.

I mean, you guys probably didn't see the fig action.

You couldn't see it.

Yeah, we were listening.

I promise you, there was no visual aid needed.

I saw it.

I was listening.

But, baby boy, I saw it all.

I'm in the car like, ugh.

Yeah, a girl I know watched the video and she was like, none of those guys know how to get pussy.

the whole, once I locked Ming in and he agreed to do it, and he said, I said, I'm going to have ISAL Comics tattoo, and he laughed and he was like, I'm all for it, whatever you want to do.

The first thing, the very first game, I was like, he has to do is Sunday stud because I just wanted to see,

I wanted to have on camera him performing on a fig.

I just thought it would be some of the most

unforgettable images that most people would see.

Yeah.

I was really, I was so proud proud of that episode.

It was a good one.

Jimmy brings a lot of that.

Jimmy's awesome.

That early Ming enthusiasm where it's like, I don't give a shit.

That get him enthusiasm where it's like, I'll put on this fucking, like, brings the skin tight red suit and show my twig and berries to the Patreon.

Get hims, I think, is more like lack of

self-worth.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I would say that.

He's just like, I just hate myself.

So sure, I'll be right back.

I don't ever want anybody to think, though, that Jimmy is being coerced into getting bad tattoos because he had bad tattoos he had a thousand bad tattoos before we met him he had that

it wasn't his idea

there's not

his idea

get this when he came to me i told him no we're not doing that when he pitched it was he wanted to go get a haircut every episode

what

Jimmy the hair gas trims

take a take a little off i can't remember exactly what it was but he told me yeah i want to get a a haircut and just talk.

Like, we'll have

just a regular episode with a weird haircut.

It'll be like the barbershop scene in Coming to America.

Yes, it was.

He wanted to do some sort of barbershop take on, you know, how like

the LeBron James thing on HBO.

Yeah.

He wanted to do some sort of take on that, some tasty version of that.

And I was like, no, that's so lame.

Suddenly, Bonnet Heads takes a distant

worst episode ever.

It's full of like mega superstars who I enjoy.

So not Jimmy the haircutter.

Hey, I fuck with Jimmy the hair guy hard.

I like that dude.

I love his energy.

I've only met him once, but like you, you, you talk to him and you're like, who is this fucking like entity that is in front of me?

And you're just happier when he leaves.

You know what I mean?

You just get an injury.

He gives us a little bit of injection of exuberance and wide-eyed exuberance because he's not used to it.

He's not jaded by it yet.

But

I'm fucking terrified.

It's funny.

But I also also don't want to say that

he's getting bad tattoos because he just wants he's got really fucking shitty tattoos.

Someone told me he's got like fucking criminals on his fucking body.

Don Fido.

Yeah.

And I'm like, thinking about it,

is that Ben Margera's uncle or something?

I mean, he's a child.

He has.

He probably got it.

Oh, I thought you were talking about that Mike and Mink tattoo.

I think if you're not touching it.

top five top five

yeah

top five

do you know do you get it yet no he's gonna get somebody's gonna get it

there's literally 35 people who get it

oh what else we got so yeah so but

as somebody who has been there from the beginning though what what what if you being honest what's one thing you can be like you know what i miss or what you should bring back rather than being negative being like well you shouldn't do this what's something you wish that we were doing that we're not

that's tough bring back johnny shram yeah johnny shram that's definitely number one

what is all right what is what's the thing that you're like boy that was okay but i really wish this happened or

Or whatever it is.

It's tough because

the only thing that works is things you guys are interested in.

So bringing something back that you're not wanting to do right now wouldn't make sense.

Like I said, though, I mean, for me, the biggest thing I always liked was game shows where you're the host of and you're absolutely berating everybody for being stupid.

And I feel like that hasn't happened in a while.

They'll like the nightmare Steve Harvey, who just hates everybody on the show.

Yeah, like when we did the Patreon episode with the 70s stuff, was it, what was it?

Was it Match Game?

No, not Match Game.

Oh, no, Tattletales.

Tattletales.

And

Frank and Mary Beth, I think, were like a little bit lit.

And Walt's like, you guys are drinking?

One of my favorite things in the world.

Somebody gives an answer, and it's so ridiculously dumb, Walt just can't help but burst out laughing at them.

Yeah, he's not good at hiding his disdain for your stupid answers.

What percent do you think it is?

He'd be like, 10%.

Oh, my God.

Walt would just say, 10%.

10%.

All right.

So, you know what?

It's good to hear, though.

If the curator gives us a thumbs up,

fuck everybody.

That's all we need.

Hey, bro, why didn't you say more me undies or something?

Like, I'm right here.

The fuck was that?

He's like, I just want you guys to be happy.

You're basically Twitter right now.

I'm here for you, Reddit.

I'm going to get him.

Is that Twitter now?

Is Twitter like nice to everybody?

They're overly nice, I believe.

Unless you're Elon Musk and then they're not a fan.

I get weird love on Twitter for things that you shouldn't be praising someone for.

It's just like normal things.

I feel like I could tweet out, man, I fucked up, got drunk, fell down the stairs, broke my arm.

And no one would be like, well, why are you drinking, walking down the stage?

Just be like, fuck those stairs, man.

That's sort of the level of Twitter right now.

I feel like Twitter is more people

talking directly to the person, like the show, like you guys, versus Reddit is them talking to each other about you.

About you, yeah.

So, Twitter is going to be a little bit more positive because it's generally people interacting directly with you versus Reddit is let's all get together and talk about those guys.

They just want to make you feel good about

it.

I don't go to our Reddit.

Is that what they're doing?

I don't know.

I don't go to your Reddit anymore either.

Especially not after you drop this motherfucker.

I'm not even sure.

I'm going to fucking check the internet.

You better get some teeth work done in Cancun when that week comes when we drop this

get some good get some good

i tell you what i'm gonna grab some good painkillers you know what's that what'd you call it the anesthesia anesthesia get some good anesthesia good mexican anesthesia you can do that in mexico even if they don't if you like if you don't have a prescription

you just keep walking to different pharmacies and eventually one of them will go cash and you'll go

yeah

and they're like what bet anything even that stuff that michael jackson was taking off the yeah anything really anything

And you're not worried about that kind of shady?

Well, no, because I didn't buy any of it.

Why aren't you shooting a text next time you're going down to Mexico?

I know the exact pharmacies you can hit.

And I mean, if you're into weed or cocaine, just walk by a taxi driver.

On one of the things, I was shooting a thing for a thing, and

I'm talking to like the people who watch that thing.

And I'm like, this, this,

I'm dancing.

And he, uh, he, I'm like, I'm out here cancun like an American asshole holding my phone.

And a guy walks by and goes, and I'm literally fucking video recording.

And you can tell I'm video recording.

He goes, Migo, Migo.

And he stops me.

I'm like, he goes, weed, cocaine.

And I was like, ah, no, glasses, Migo.

And he walked on.

And I was like, well, that's going to be a good video.

And it was.

Yeah.

You cannot, I mean, I guess getting stuff from a pharmacy is okay, but you can't get shit off the street anymore.

Everything is fucking fentanyl in it.

Yeah, you can't trust the shit they're selling you at the moment.

No pharmacy.

It's definitely fentanyl.

At the pharmacy?

In Mexico?

100%.

Anything under the

you just fucking torpedoed your like.

No, no, no.

I thought it was great.

So you're like, no, they have the real stuff because they're a real pharmacy.

But all the time, tourists come in and go, can I buy Xanax, for example?

And 90% of those pharmacies will say no because you can't.

You have to have a doctor's prescription.

Not that hard to get it.

There's a doctor next to most pharmacies.

You just got to pay like 50 bucks.

If you don't want to pay 50 bucks every time you want to go to the doctor, you pay like 30 bucks to the lady who sells illegal narcotics out of her pharmacy.

And what they do is they sell the real shit to people with prescriptions because that stuff gets checked.

Right.

And then they sell the bullshit fentanyl-pressed Xanax that has Xanax pressed on it to people like me who come into the pharmacy saying morphine or like Brian, I guess, because I didn't do that.

Fucking loser.

Yeah, it's good that I think it's good I wasn't visiting Mexico in those days.

I would have stocked up, you know.

I think how would you have gotten it back, though?

Uh,

prison wallet, it was actually easier back then.

You ain't getting it back now.

Would it put you explored the cavity?

Uh, I doubt it.

I probably would have put it in a bag or swallowed it, yeah.

Some

I would have swallowed like 80 balloons of heroin

all for personal use.

I would put it right up there.

Really?

Right up there.

Is that what you did?

Have I before?

No, I mean, when I was in trucks,

I've prisoned wallet a couple of times.

Yeah, what do they call it?

Tucking or pocketing or what do they call it when you put it in your buck?

Prison wallet?

Plugging.

Prison wallet.

Plugging.

Plugging.

Yeah.

I brought in a plug.

That was

a scene once, allegedly.

I got to say, when we played hockey years and years and years ago, which would have been the first time I met you, I think.

It wasn't so long ago.

It's like 15 years ago.

In Brantford?

No, it wasn't even Brantford.

No, it wasn't.

I didn't meet you the first Brantford.

It was like a couple weeks after.

Because it's insane that I drove up.

We played a sub hockey show.

Was it Eaton Town we were at?

I don't know.

Whoever the fucking silent Bob Stand-In was, he played goalie for that place.

So we would go there because no one.

no one knew about it.

And we could.

Is this relevant to where it was?

No.

Not at all.

My point being that like when I started talking to Maxwell, it came up that he had, I guess you had just gotten out of jail.

And that I immediately was interested in him.

I'm like, what did you do?

Why were you there?

How was it?

And that's how I started talking to Maxwell.

And then, if you remember, he was like, he was just started doing that podcast and he had done an episode about, I think it was your wife selling her panties.

I heard her.

Yeah, we listened to it in the car coming back from the bottom of the car.

Way back from the second Brantford.

That changed my life forever.

Like, no shit.

The course of my life, wherever it was going, you listening to that stupid fucking thing that I made with Tabby, Tabitha, my wife, changed everything.

Like, my whole life went this way.

I chased a new dream.

Good way or a bad way?

Oh, dude, I'm so happy right now.

Like, I'm,

dude, I'm doing everything I ever wanted to do in life, right?

And because of us,

like, we all know.

Yes, like, because my whole life, all I wanted to do was, like, make things and be creative and entertain.

And I was always told not to or don't do that, go do a different thing.

And when the the meundies thing happened and I was writing things and people liked them, I went, Well, fuck, maybe I'm not terrible.

And that's literally what gave me the confidence to go to college, which I graduated from.

This guy is something else.

He's going to school, he's earning degrees, he's setting up wrestling shit, he's got kids and a wife.

But back to, but don't want to lose, don't want to like overstep that.

Let's get, let's definitely hear about that.

Sure, shell, baby.

But the thing that interests me was the, you said you had pocketed before yeah how do you prepare for that um like how do you mentally say yourself okay i'm gonna do this and then get it there because i went to the doctor the other day and i was and i was told i could have the finger but or but i was he was confident enough in my my results that we could wait till next year and i was like let's let's put that off to next year I'd had a finger up my ass before

sexually.

So I knew roughly what it was going to feel like.

Yeah, but it's isn't it?

You can't convince yourself.

There's like a little hump in there.

And if you get it over that hump, it'll sit there until you take a shit.

It's not.

It's like a little.

There's no way you can convince me.

It's the same.

Well, I mean, I'm not saying that you should go home and pocket fucking weed up your ass.

Clearly, you're not a fan of the Atlantic City Smokers.

I'm just saying that somewhere right now, there's somebody

that's stuck.

Not in this state.

As As soon as I leave,

let's just say, in theory, I'm not going to because I don't have to take fucking weed home.

It's like taking sand to the desert.

Are you, how much weed do you smoke a day?

Oh, fuck, probably like 75% less since I came back from Mexico.

Is it legal in Tennessee now?

Fuck no.

Oh, so you got a, you got to

skirt Johnny Law.

That has a little bit to do with it, but I spent two weeks down there by myself, and it's just like this ocean air and shit, right?

And I came home and I smoked weed for the first time, and I looked at my wife and I went, that is fucking poison.

Like, it feels like fire in my throat.

Curator, you deal with

you deal with the devil's lettuce?

No, no, you didn't do anything.

You're strong.

I'm sorry to say, Walt, I'm more sober than you.

I've never drank, never smoked, never done any of that in my whole life.

Ever.

You eat fucking sandwiches, though.

Why?

I do eat sandwiches.

Why do you think you stayed away from what?

What caused you to be so?

a pocket shit?

No, no.

Why are you such a fucking strong, moral, statured man?

I prefer that version of it.

Why are you so willing to march to your own drummer, much like me?

Particular reason.

Me and you.

Me and you, curator.

And it's a good thing.

Me, you and Father Lance.

The buffering boys.

I mean, it would be a combination of just being completely unsusceptible to influence, and I just don't know.

I love that.

Yeah, I know you do.

Oh, I heard that.

That gave me an erection.

And I don't want to do anything that would alter my mind.

I'm very an in-my-head person, so I'm not a fan of the idea.

And as far as alcohol, I've never held stress throughout my whole life.

You're not a bad guy.

A stressful guy?

No, I've never.

Do you ever worry about that, though?

That it's not normal to not have any stress.

I don't know.

I don't have a stress.

The biggest stress is that I don't know.

I literally was stressed.

Okay, do you ever wonder why you don't ever have stress?

Because that is not normal.

No, I'm just good at compartmentalizing and understanding that things that happened in the past are in the past.

I can work my way through it and not hold on to it.

So you don't suffer from guilt?

No.

That's sociopath.

Yeah, man.

You're fucked up.

I'm not saying I'm not a sociopath, but no.

Now you know why he knows all that fucking shit.

He's not.

I don't generally suffer from like

guilt or regret.

That's not really enough.

I don't feel guilty.

Wow.

Do you suffer from anything?

How do you feel about vegans?

I need somebody that's like you.

I mean,

what about your wife?

Does she have the same

mindset?

Because that would be difficult, I think, to live with somebody who's always so even keeled.

Who's basically a Vulcan?

It really is, man.

It's Sunday Jeff over here.

Like always.

I mean, she's not the same way.

She's an average emotional being.

Yeah.

She's emotional, normal human.

I always tell her that it's like things like driving in the car.

I don't get road rage.

I maybe honk my horn once a year.

What if you have a fucking douchebag in your blind spot, though?

Yeah.

Man, man, what the fuck is that?

What is wrong with you?

I love you, but you got to stop doing that.

It's only for like a couple seconds.

My favorite thing is you guys ask why, and he's just.

No answer.

The little light goes on it.

Hey, man, sometimes everybody don't need to know what you're thinking right now.

How you're thinking it.

Has your wife gotta go?

I've learned that, yeah.

Just take a second.

Has your wife gotten frustrated, though, with someone who is so emotionally keel?

I mean, sure, occasionally.

Do you show excitement?

Sure.

How do you show it?

I mean, how does anybody

excited right now?

I am excited.

I know.

Why are my nostrils flaming?

I bring my hat down.

Walt's got a beer under his nose right now.

Get that caliper out.

See, let's stay dilated.

Wow.

So

that's interesting, right?

I'm not the same way.

What do you mean?

Oh, no.

I'm a lot different than the curator.

In one second, he's like, I really like to live in my own mind.

For one second, I'm in my own mind.

I swear to God, get me some fucking weed or something.

Like, I don't want to be there.

So let me guess.

You enjoy a lot of alone time, like, because I do.

I enjoy having my own time and thinking and

like really like that's when I get most of my

most of my shit done.

It's like, I've got to be alone.

Do you feel the same way?

Sure, yeah.

Like, you don't mind going to like lunch by yourself.

No, everybody.

You prefer it, don't you?

I don't know that I prefer it, but I definitely don't.

I feel like I should.

I don't mind doing stuff.

Like, going to the movies by myself is great.

Yeah, I don't mind that either.

I mean, my wife doesn't listen to this, so she's not going to get mad at it.

But, like, my favorite time of the day is past 10 o'clock when she goes to sleep.

Walk away from the microphone.

How do you know she's not going to hear this?

Because she doesn't listen.

Okay.

There's no chance it could pop up while you're in the car.

Yeah, you're listening and she hears.

Because I'm going to put it in the clips for sure.

These two are about to go to Melbourne's and ignore everybody else.

No, I actually got to like, I have a hard time listening to podcasts on speakers because for the last 15 years, I've done thousands of hours in earbuds.

And so, like, we're coming up driving, and it's so weird to me listening to the car.

It really is.

It's not the same experience.

Yeah, it's just different.

I don't know.

It's weird.

Also, no, I don't listen to the car or anything.

I wish you lived around here, man.

I think you would be.

You'd be have your own show, like Jimmy the Hare guy.

Just do things to see what kind of rise you get out of them.

I wish, too, that

I could handle all of the tech stuff.

We wish that, too.

We got a guy who fucking just constantly throws it back like he doesn't want the responsibility.

You're like, here, you listen to it, too.

I want three years.

Why?

Because, yeah, because I'm fucking hearing a whining, and you guys aren't.

So, right.

So, you didn't do anything to fix the wine, though.

I tried 10 different things.

All you did was add in more whining.

Thank you.

That was a setup.

So, you're good with tech, too?

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah.

What do you think we're doing wrong?

Yeah, why we fuck up on it, bitch.

That was Rupert's fault.

I mean, I would have to do a deep dive into it all.

You fucking politician, just answer the question.

Can we afford a second office coach?

Where do you live?

Two office coaches.

Could it be?

I'd be willing to give up a couple bucks.

It's only like a 13-hour drive.

It would be kind of a long commute.

You can commute?

Yeah, it'd be a long commute.

We're probably only going to give you like maybe six hours' notice, too, because Q's constantly like, okay, now I can do it.

Wow.

Well, all right, guys.

Thanks for

coming up.

You live in Tennessee as well?

No, Georgia.

Georgia.

Georgia.

It's about the same drive, though.

No, it's nice.

So he drove down the three and a half hours to snag me.

And then we did about 14 with the little traffic.

And then we're going to do the 14 back.

And when we get back and I'm home and like, fuck, that sucked.

He still has to do another

three and a half that.

He's a Vulcan, man.

He's not stressed.

When I asked him, like, do you want to roll up with me?

I was 99% sure he would say no.

Because even though we get along and we've done a lot of things before and we talk a lot, he's not the kind of guy to put

himself in a position where he's in a car with anyone, even if he likes them, definitely not in a hotel room.

Like, he's a solo YOLO kind of cat, but he's special.

I got a lot of love for that dude.

He's special.

I got to say, curator, I was a little disappointed you were coming up because I thought Maxwell would bring his wife.

She could come over to the house.

Maybe me and Maxwell do a little soft swapping.

This kind of shit.

Don't throw that off yet.

He already suggested this, and I said, fine, I'll fuck him.

But

we'll see if we can get some flight credits together.

So, you on a whim just were like, you just dropped everything to take a road trip with Maxwell to Jersey?

Yeah.

How does it have time at work?

You can just get off?

I mean, I only take one day, so sure.

And it's gotten to the point.

How long have you guys been on the road?

Well,

how the fuck did you only take one day, bro?

We're going to be gone like six.

Yeah, well, I already get the fourth off, so I only take the first off, and I get the whole last weekend.

And the wife was like, she was okay with you just like dropping everything on the holiday.

It's very frank five-ish, you know, just to off the holiday and just come to.

It's also gotten to the point at work when I say I'm going to take off to go up to Jersey.

Like, oh, you're going to see the podcast again?

Like, yeah.

They listen to this part.

Are you the most productive worker at work?

Yeah.

I knew it.

It's

the fucking best office coach we ever had.

Easily the second best.

Well, you know it.

He knows he would be.

We all know he would be.

That's where I fit in.

That's exactly where I fit in.

Let's get a studio in Atlanta.

We can't move for him.

He's got to move for us.

Yeah, how would you feel about you and your wife?

You move up to Jersey.

Do you own a house down there?

Yeah.

Are you willing to pay five times as much for a house?

And remember that two dogs are your bosses.

Yeah, they have

say over you.

You're not allowed to sit on a couch if they're already up there.

Nine line.

I'm stressed out now.

I'm worried.

But thank you guys.

I'm glad you guys came up.

This was awesome.

We had a great DD episode before this.

One of my favorite things.

So much fun.

It was.

So much fun, that thing, right?

And it's, I get, I understand why people online get mad sometimes when I'm on and I dominate this thing because much like me with wrestling, there are people who listen to this show that this is their happy place.

Their fucking life sucks or whatever.

And this is the time that they jump out of their brain and for an hour and a half, whatever, like that's the place that

well, I mean, I would imagine that this is therapy for you every fucking time you sit down, right?

So, I understand

that when they say I ruined this thing for them, I get it because they just want to hear you.

You're already predicting.

Well, I know, I mean, I know some people aren't going to like it, but like, I think it has to,

I definitely have to participate in it for it to be a thing.

If I don't, like, chirp back at them, they don't care as much.

And that's pretty much the route I'm going to take.

I enjoy these things so much.

They're, they're like

lifeblood, right?

Like, I look back and I can't even believe it's been 15 years.

It feels like a whisper.

Fuck, dude, you guys are like seven of my top 10 fucking life moments, man.

Like, I live for this shit.

Seven.

How do we get up to like get up to those eight, nine, or so I have my wife away?

He has his wife away.

I think he would say seven of the top 10.

Not necessarily

on all ten slots.

That's the only way.

That's the only way.

That's why you always shoot for more.

He's got kids.

Never get complacent.

Curators 10 for 10 of the money.

Yeah, but

if I tell you you're already 10, you're not going to let me come back, bro.

I need to leave three open.

No, I think I'm just, and I really mean, I know I'm being facetious in the front end.

If I ever made anybody fucking feel bad because I was trying to be a cunt, because I was, because they came at me and I was like, fuck you, I'm going to double down on it then.

I'm sorry.

It was fucking dumb.

Kinder, gentler, Maxwell.

Who gives a fuck?

I'm just

cut it all out.

Yeah, it's all

coming out.

No, no, it's like negative energy makes me

a worse person, and it fucking rubs off on my kids if you're relieved.

Evil begets evil.

Yeah, it likes that sort of thing.

Yes, and I just want.

With great power comes great responsibility.

Any more powerful people?

You got any more fucking

tired cliché?

What do you got about?

Kill him with kindness.

You got anything about legacy?

No?

All right.

All right, Maxwell.

Thanks for the apology.

I want to apologize to everyone listening out there for all this pussy-ass feel-good bullshit.

Although, I also do want to apologize to Taylor Swift.

Yes.

Walt and Maxwell's opinions do not reflect me, curator, and get himself.

We're going to get Mark.

Taylor Swift forever.

Tay Swift, all the way.

Tell him, Steve, Dave.