#553: So Smooth

Wait, a straight white man is talking and he's over 50.

Let's listen to what he has to say.

Fucking kids today.

today.

Yeah, they're pieces of shit, but I gotta admit, it made me laugh.

And within 10 minutes, he was on the phone talking to Buzz Aldrin's wife for secretary.

Right.

That's good enough for me.

Tell him, Steve, Dave.

Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell'em Steve Dave.

Here with Waltz.

Hello.

And here with BQ.

Yo, yo, yo.

We are yoden.

Dave.

No Joe DeRosa this week.

He was a little bit busy, but I'm told that next week is the week.

Next week's the week, huh?

All right.

Begins the new phase of TSD.

Possibly.

Possibly.

Well, I went on Reddit, which is something I rarely do.

How'd that go for you?

Well,

took a little trip down the sewers?

Well, I was looking at the stuff I normally look at, and then I saw TESD Cares come up.

Okay.

And I'm like, you know what?

Let me read a little bit.

Let me just see a little bit.

Get some direct, honest feedback.

So there were many, many comments about the episode where we talked about having guests on.

Majority of the people do not want guests.

The majority of people on Reddit do not want guests.

Of people on Reddit.

People who are speaking up.

But that's initially where I saw that a lot of people did.

That they did want there's a you know there's a

certain

energy that can be injected by having a new

guest.

But

okay, well

I also wanted to say about guests though, I have gotten a ton of emails from great listeners who are vying for the position to be the booker.

I haven't answered any of them and it's not because you know I'm being rude.

It's because somebody in the family has stepped up big time

to try to land the role as our official guest booker.

Really?

Mr.

Young Go-getter.

I can only imagine it's Chuck.

It's not Chuck.

It's not Chuck.

No, Chuck has too much.

I was going to say, but he's when I think you're a young go-getter, my mind goes to Chuck.

It's somebody else.

Even younger than Chuck.

I don't know if he's younger than Chuck.

I think he is younger than Chuck.

Sunday Jeff?

Could you imagine the

conversation?

Yeah, and I was like, I need you to start booking guests for us.

Man's never been.

You got to start from scratch.

You don't have any contacts, no rolodex.

No, Brian Rupert.

Rupert.

And he has started out,

you know, swinging for the fences.

You know what?

I know he invited my buddy Vinnie Paulino on his podcast the other day.

So he's really, he's going for some A-listers.

I don't know who that is.

Oh, you don't own it.

Oh, but I do know these names.

I think you'll know them too, Q.

Okay.

Buzz Aldrin.

Still alive.

Yeah, I think he just got married, right?

Yeah.

Is he 97 in 20?

Yeah, he looks great, though, too.

I want to get him on just to be like,

did going to the moon somehow affect yourselves?

Because you look amazing for 90.

Like, we should all be this lucky to look like you do at 50.

And he's married someone much.

You look 30 years younger than him.

Well, they're like, when you're 97, you marry somebody 67.

Sure.

Like, they're younger.

But do you think that still plays?

That still gets the ladies to maybe loosen up their hips a little bit.

Oh, if you walked on the moon.

Really?

Yeah.

That lure module is a rockin'.

Yeah.

Maybe not with, like, you know, I don't think he's pulling 20-year-olds with that story.

Why?

They're not impressed by a man who has fucking gone through the fucking Van Ryan belt.

No.

No.

they'd rather see like this guy fucking took his BMX and jumped fucking.

Dude, all he did was take the patriarchy to the moon because

they don't want to hear it from you or from him.

You got to wait to see the next person that gets to the moon.

That's who they want to talk to.

Not only did he,

this is how impressed I am with Rupp.

He didn't get anybody.

He didn't get anybody.

No one got impressed yet.

Yeah, I'm trying to get fucking Biden.

Anything.

But Rup got to talk to either it's his wife

or his secretary.

He's not sure.

Okay.

Buzz Aldrins.

Yeah.

He reached out to Musk, Elon.

He's been known to do podcasts.

I mean,

Joe Rogan, yeah.

Would you like Elon Musk to smoke weed in here?

Yes.

Yes, I would.

It might detract from the dog scent, just so you know.

We don't want to lose that.

No, definitely.

That's that homey feel that all the listeners love they want when they come in here.

Whoa.

Do you guys sell pets?

Are you guys keeping gerbils in here?

Like we're joking around, but I went into Fins and Feathers in Red Bank with Mary Beth the other day.

She wanted to get some fish.

Less than 15 seconds.

I'm like, I cannot do it.

It smelled so fucked up.

Like a thousand hamster cages that haven't been changed in a thousand years.

Yeah, that's like they're breeding gerbils.

Oh, it's disgusting, man.

And that young whipper snapper rupp, his last swing

was for the goat.

He reached out and he's made contact with Brady's camp.

Now,

I haven't gotten any updates.

I like his enthusiasm.

But don't you like a guy who's like, you know what?

I'm not starting small.

No, I'm going to go on.

And then if he does get somebody,

maybe it's somebody less, you know, maybe not as big in stature as those three names, but then you could be like, Well, I'm reached out to them, but I also got this guy who's a beat writer for the devils, he tells me, and I'm like, that's not going to work.

That's not going to work for John.

And then we ridicule Rup nonstop.

Like after the dude leaves.

A beat writer for the devils versus like Oz Aldrin.

But I was like, Q doesn't care.

Bri doesn't care.

I can't bring on a fucking beat writer for the devils.

Like, no matter how much I would like to talk to him, I go, it would be fucking boring as fuck.

I said, it would be like if I brought one of my podcast guys on and we tried to explain the world of bullshit.

Right.

Yeah.

It's too deep.

It's just too deep.

But that's why I haven't answered any of the listeners who have, the multitude of listeners who have reached out and vied and said, I'll take on this gig.

I'll get you guests.

Some of them might actually know people too, you know?

As far as we know, Rupp knows no one.

But I just love, like, within 10 minutes, he was on the phone talking to Buzz Aldrin's wife for secretary.

Right.

That's good enough for me.

That's all you're looking for.

Most modest of efforts.

I looked up a phone on the internet.

I don't know.

It might be the right Buzz Aldrin.

It might not be.

Fucking rough.

All right.

Well, we'll see what happens.

This will be fun to track.

Continuing on Reddit, I found out that all three of us are clueless and cultureless.

It turns out, if you don't know something that a person on Reddit knows, you're automatically stupid.

All right.

Evidently, I've been pronouncing like with this green chef.

I've been pronouncing one of the dishes incorrectly.

It's some foreign dish that I've never eaten, nor have I ever seen the word before.

I think it's called tempanada, but it's like I was pronouncing it tempanada or something.

Tempanada.

When I read it,

when I read, yeah, I know, right?

When I read the thread, I'm like,

they're making fun of my pronunciation of it, but I'm like, I still don't know what word it is.

You guys aren't actually helping me.

Yeah,

I'm at a loss as to what word they're making fun of me for.

I could at least get more into it then, you know?

Walt retarded.

He pronounced Joe's name Joe De La Rosa instead of Joe DeRosa.

No, I did.

You know why?

But then assumed he was Italian instead of fucking Egyptian American or whatever the fuck he is, which I didn't know either.

And I've I've known him since.

I didn't know he was Egyptian.

Neither did I.

I'm not even sure we can have him in now.

He's adopted.

We don't know what he is.

That's true.

In my defense, the De La Rosa thing is because there's this great chicken place.

That chicken place is awesome.

Yeah.

DeRosa's.

Yeah, De Rosa.

Yeah, I'm always thinking about that.

So that's why I made that mistake.

I won't make that same thing.

Surely people here.

No, my God, I hope

you guys are not.

You still call him Ian K.

Morris.

But I have been

in

massive meetings with one of my adopted sons to come up with a game to play when Mr.

I'm just going to call him Joe because I can't remember if it's what it is to play a game with Joe when he comes with you guys.

Oh, wow.

A new game.

Brand new.

Which acolyte are you working with here?

Tom.

Tom really has stepped up.

Tom has been taking, he's been taking some hits on social media.

So now he's more determined than ever to prove his worth, which is great for us.

It's good for us, but

we already like him.

Yeah, I like proving

shots, Tom.

Yeah, everybody's been taking shots lately.

It's just, I think this, the world is,

you know, not many people are really happy.

Yeah.

And I feel that that kind of

creates an atmosphere where people are like want to bitch about things.

And sometimes they bitch about TSD.

Yeah, I

and I say this as someone that has spent time posting on the internet.

It's not like anything I've been above in my life, but I find that happy people don't waste their time posting on the internet.

Like, it's never been when I'm like good that I'm like, let me go online and then take the temperature of the world.

It's always like, how can I anonymously lash out or whatever?

Yeah, it's not good.

Yeah, I think the world is filled with a lot of unhappy people.

And I think a way that they like they lash out is to,

you know, kind of go after Tom.

It's not just Tom.

Which one is that again?

Yeah, so he,

but we came up with something, I think, I don't know if it's funny, but I do think it's like it's one of the strongest games that could actually

be turned into a real game show.

Like, it could be something so strong that I could see it being played on like network television.

No, it's Tom, so make sure DeRosa has about two and a half hours.

Yeah, could he just.

No, no, he's not even at the be here.

Oh, he's not even going to be here.

He's not even going to be here.

But I did want to give him a question.

I'm at the game, though, usually his game is not going to be a good idea.

No, no, this is very much in the vein.

I know

it's going to turn you off if I say it, but it's a word game like dyslexia,

but it's a lot more simple and dumbed down for

you guys.

Frustrating, because that's probably where we're going to want Joe DeRosa is tiny bit frustrated because that's when his magic really emerges.

Would you?

I mean, I know I'm putting you in an awkward position.

If I was like, would you consider him an intelligent man?

Joe?

Yeah.

You're not going to say no.

That's what I'm saying.

I'm putting you in.

No, I wouldn't.

He is a really smart guy.

Then he will thrive at this game.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Could you get a round of dyslexia at the go just so we can let him play it?

Oh, yeah, to show him what, like, yeah, okay, yeah.

Just one round of dyslexia.

Yeah, a lightning round.

Yeah.

I want to see him.

Absolutely.

I would love to see Joe DeRosa wrap his head around.

But yeah, this is the debut of a brand new game

when Joe comes.

All right.

Nice.

I like it.

I was wondering last night,

Walt, you receive.

Wait, wait.

Well, you said what you did wrong or what Walt did wrong.

You said Reddit was ripping on us.

You said

he says DeRosa.

Yeah, you didn't get anything specific that I saw because I stopped reading after a little bit.

All right.

Yeah, so you were safe as far as I saw.

All right.

Now you read some of those impractical jokers threads, and maybe we've got a different story to tell.

Oh, I would not.

No.

You've got to be the lovable, most lovable of the.

Oh, I don't think it's that.

Ever since

there's a type of person that ever since Joe left the show is just like, the show sucks.

I won't even watch it.

And you're like, but if you won't even watch it, how do you know it sucks?

I know it sucks.

Yeah.

Or like, bring Joe back, or this is fucked up.

And you're like, your instinct is to be like,

you understand that I didn't want Joe to leave.

Like, I didn't ask him to leave.

Like, I didn't want him to leave.

He left.

But a lot of people over there act like that's it.

So I've stopped going.

Like, he was voted out.

Yeah.

Which is what's.

I see stuff like that.

I see a lot of people offering up their speculation as to why.

But for the most part,

it's pretty positive.

I'm just fucking around with you.

It's pretty positive stuff.

Yeah.

Good.

That's nice.

Yeah.

But you were going to ask me about last night, yeah.

Like, if you receive a photo text, right, from me, you mean a text that has a photo?

It has a photo attached to it,

never heard it referred to as that, you know, a picture text, whatever selfie, selfie, yeah, it's just selfie in a way, yes.

And the caption says, so smooth you don't even know,

and it's a picture of what you assume to be my balls or somebody's balls.

Now, to Walt, I say,

how do you address it?

Yeah, I mean, I just think

it was so smooth, you don't even know.

So stupid.

I would think after this many years that,

you know,

you shouldn't even have to question whether you should send that photo.

You know, I'm not going to be like,

no, of course not.

I know you're not going to laugh.

Some of your friends.

We were going to laugh.

But

my question is, would you think it was an accident?

Maybe I didn't.

Oh, not with the caps yet.

I didn't even intend to send it to you.

But you thought you were sending it to one of somebody else

making that joke, that very

sophomoric.

How do you say sophomoric?

Sophomoric, yeah.

Joke, you know, like a locker room joke.

Right.

You know, it doesn't really play for me.

Right.

Would I assume you did it as a mistake?

Yeah, would you think I did it as a mistake?

How could you?

Yeah, maybe.

I might.

Okay.

Same thing, but it's Q who does it.

To me.

Yeah.

Are you more likely to attribute it to a mistake if it's Q?

Drunk?

Drunk?

Yeah.

Drunken mistake.

Drunken mistake.

So smooth.

So, drunken mistake?

Asshole on purpose.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Thank you all.

I'm not happy with either.

Either way, right?

Well, why, yeah, it does beg the question as to why alcohol makes me do that.

Like, send pictures.

Like, I get drunk and send pictures.

You're like, I know what Walt takes honey for genitals.

I made, oh, I also think it's a mistake you even meant it for me.

Oh, okay, I see.

Yeah.

Oh, so I was sending some lucky lady.

Yeah, yeah, some honey.

Yeah.

You know, and you just mistakenly in a drunken stupor sent it to me.

Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

And then it's like, so you don't ever address address it with Q, you're just assuming it's a mistake.

No, I'd be like, was this meant for me?

Quick, save the photo.

You would ask me if it was meant for you?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, definitely.

You write back, what do you think?

I'm just like, you don't even know that way.

We did a show.

This was years ago when we first started touring.

And there was a picture of Joe as a slide that was a punchline, and I replaced it just before we went on stage with a shot of my balls, and it threw Joe off.

Great.

This is when we're doing comedy clubs and stuff.

I've got a pension for this.

You have a history of using your testicles to

punchline.

That was just,

I mean, it was close up.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

So it wasn't like, you know, dangling testicles.

But he looked at me.

He's like, what is that?

And I just started laughing.

He's like, is that your balls?

The whole police went nuts.

I don't know.

That's a good job.

That is pretty funny.

I don't know where I saw it.

I don't know who's in possession of it, but I know there's a picture of you, a muse.

Oh, on the Mall Rats set.

Yeah, but like you guys are grinning ear to ear as if, like, as if it's the greatest day in your lives.

Like, you're like, you two just won the fucking lottery.

Like, you couldn't even be happier if you found out you won the lottery and then you guys have your balls out of your flies.

Out of our flies.

And your arms around each other.

You guys see this picture.

Yeah.

I don't know where it is.

I don't know what's going on.

I saw this picture.

I think it was at the stash in the basement for a while.

Really?

Yeah.

I think maybe Muse left it there.

Where Mike and Ming were using it it for some

unnatural purpose

sons of bitches

let's recreate this photo

you're not smiling big enough

come on man be happy like these two

yeah i remember that picture i think i have my vulgarians jersey on if i'm not mistaken so both you guys

have taken your testicles out for comedic purposes

i'm the only one at the table that could say you've never pulled that off never did that it's not too late Oh, it's too late.

Like

when picture phones first started, the first picture I ever got was from Muse, and it was a picture of his balls.

So I sent him one back.

It's never not funny, man.

Like

the meme of that black guy with the huge cock sitting on the edge of the bed.

It's like, you're not going to believe this.

And then you open it up and you're like, God damn it, they got me again.

Is it just being too stodgy?

Because even as a teenager, I

thought it was funny when guys would pull their cock out or their balls out in person and do it.

I never thought it was funny.

I was just like, this dude's weird.

This dude's a sociopath.

This guy might be

a little late in his step because he wants his nuts out constantly for everybody.

I don't have eyes to see it.

No, not going to like that.

No, I've been around a lot of guys growing, like, in high school.

Sure.

That was their go-to.

Just pulling balls out.

All of a sudden, yeah, all of a sudden we're playing football.

All of a sudden, his pants are off.

Look, man, they're funny.

Did he have a big dick?

Tackle me.

I mean, because I noticed guys who do that a lot tend to have dicks that like showing off.

I didn't really want to size it up.

I'm just like, whoa.

I avert my eyes to the sky.

You couldn't take it.

Could you?

Yeah.

I worked in a fucking fire.

Cocks and balls flying all over that place.

The other day, it's funny,

this should come up because the other day, and I wrote it down to see if you would do it to Deb or what the reaction would be.

But I was in the kitchen the other day, and

Maryabeth was doing something, and I was like, oh my God, do you believe this?

And she's like, what?

She turns around and I was like, check it out.

And I had my dick and balls like all the way out of my fly.

Just standing there.

She's like, oh, you know, went back to doing whatever she was doing.

It's like, that's not.

Like, I tell people, I tell people you're the funniest person that has ever had.

You're not doing a good job.

Like, you're, yeah, you're, you're going.

I'm laughing at you.

There's something so

just almost aggressively immature about it that is funny.

It's just, it's, it's not the dick and balls.

It's the fact that he's showing them.

It's just so stupid.

It's really dumb.

Yeah.

I mean, it's like, and it's one thing that it's like, I do it to her versus like a group of girls.

Like, I barely know.

No, no, no.

Like, there's not funny enough.

It's not a humor.

That's just the sexual locality of the other.

Yeah, no, you can't do that.

I mean, you never can do that.

But it's your wife in your kitchen.

It sounds like a good joke to me.

I thought it was all right.

Because she was accusing me of not being loving.

Really?

So that's what I did.

What is the thing?

You proved her wrong, I guess.

And that's the way you're going to be.

That's how I tried to.

Yeah, I was just like, hey, check it out.

It's all yours.

What was the context, though, for like, what were you, what did you do?

What prompted her to be like, yeah, loving.

Well,

I made the claim that I'm the most loving person ever.

Okay, so you started it.

Yeah.

So I started it, and she's like, yeah, right.

And I was like, what are you talking about?

And she was like, what's the last thing you did that was loving?

And I was like, I just took out my garbage balls.

Like, so this conversation obviously came after I did it.

She's like, yeah, I'm not going to count that.

She's like, what else?

And I had done something nice.

I can't can't remember what it was, though.

Took out the garbage.

I don't know.

Maybe something.

That is not.

That's not really nice.

That is not an act of loving.

Well, what's the last loving thing you did for me?

Unless you took out the garbage for like a senior citizen who can't get his own garbage out.

But the fact you took your own garbage out.

I'm practically a senior citizen.

What do you mean?

She could be taking it out from me.

That's the last loving thing I did

for another human being.

No, for Deb, for your wife.

Deb, well, I mean, I took care care of like the house when, you know, when she had

a hurt foot, you know,

and I'm getting, I'm running around like a madman, getting fucking drinks, ice, letting dogs out at six in the morning.

Yeah.

Damn, you're right.

Yeah, I mean, then Mother Teresa, you know, move over.

There's a new fucking there's a new guy.

There's a new guy in town, yeah.

Smetal and some recognition.

Last night I got some pushback on my ice cream because I wanted to have some ice cream while I was watching my forensic files.

Yeah.

And she's like, the freezers, she's like, it keeps it so cold, it hurts my shoulder, you know, to like dig it out with the scoop.

Oh,

oh, I got you.

So I was like, so you wait down there until it softens up a little.

Put in the microwave for 30 seconds.

I said,

put the scoop underneath the underneath the hot water.

She's like, I do that.

Nice.

And she came up.

It was a good 15 minutes later.

I was like, Satan, don't you feel better about yourself that you did it?

Yeah.

That you were like, I thought I couldn't do it.

I felt weak, but now I did.

She's like, no, because my shoulder hurts now.

Yeah.

We got to film.

We got to film like 24-7 at your place.

We should do a reality show.

Right?

Yeah.

I mean,

I suggested a long time ago to Walt, we do like a 24-hour wife swap.

Yeah.

I could live at Walt's house.

He could live at my house.

Okay.

No.

I don't think we need to do that.

I think, you know, just.

cameras at your place.

I love the idea of minus me being involved in it.

Yeah, she wants to get cameras up all over the place, too.

So maybe

security?

She wants it for security, but why not?

You don't have a ring?

What's that?

No, not yet.

I mean, we have one.

We just never put it up.

Really?

Yeah.

I was watching this ring footage.

My buddy Iraq, we did Would You Kindly today, and he has footage from a talk challenge.

It's called the Kool-Aid Challenge.

And it's like basically you take like, you know, like how you have a vinyl fence

and somebody goes, Oh yeah, and then they run through your fence and like break it.

Like they break the panels out.

And all this talk about fencing lately has made me sensitive to the prices.

And I'm watching these kids, like, it's like six or seven kids all in a row, like lined up across the street.

And they all are like, oh, yeah.

And they all like tear towards this vinyl fence and just crash through it.

And there's panels everywhere.

And they don't get hurt?

No, they don't get hurt because I guess it's like the vinyl's loose enough.

How do they know it's loose enough?

That's like, I don't know that they do know.

There was one kid who bounced off.

And one of them, he bounced off.

He didn't do it right.

Fucking pricey practical joke.

Pricey practical joke.

But I was thinking back because it did make me laugh.

It's like the, I forget what they call it, but like in

grocery stores, like there are people who are pretending that they fell and slipped with a gallon of milk and they would smash it and it would fucking explode all over the place.

It's like, it's that sophomoric shit that I can imagine if I was 16 being like, destroying somebody's fence sounds like maybe the best idea ever.

Yeah, I guess.

I do worry about the price of fences.

That's this old people talking.

As a kid, I never gave a shit.

I used to go yard hopping into people's pools and stuff.

We didn't really do that because not many people had pools

in our area.

We would go for swims in people's pools.

Yeah.

Which, on the scale of like.

Naughty teenage behavior is really like not that bad.

We didn't destroy anything.

Yeah.

We just used pools.

We never even got caught.

You never got caught?

Nobody ever?

Never even once got caught.

I was just imagining the sound of like, because the house was relatively close to the fence, but the sound of six people crashing through your fence at the same time in the middle of the night.

A truck hitting it.

Yeah.

And some of them were like metal.

It was like a, not like, not like yours where it's like an iron, like like heavy

steel.

It was like more of an ornate type metal thing.

They fucking totally tore the whole thing apart.

Fucking kids today yeah they're pieces of shit but I gotta admit it made me laugh

like as long as it's not happening to me then it's fine that's often the first requirement for something being funny then it's all good Mary Beth has been going crazy ever since the the launch of at TESD town the new YouTube channel she's really into YouTube stuff so she's been going and buying shit for her own YouTubing oh she's gonna start her own youtube channel she's gonna she's gonna start one with sage because sage wants to be a streamer She wants to game and all that shit.

So Mary Beth went and bought some stuff.

And she got it from?

Yeah, she did.

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I love that they put America right up front in their name, their business name.

You know, that's so patriotic.

Yeah, it's rare these days.

They're so worthy of supporting, you know, that they're like,

we love America and music.

Yeah.

And selling all these electronics from Japan.

No, no, no.

I'm sure everything that they sell is made in America.

Made America?

Absolutely.

American Music would never sell anything made out of country.

Right.

Walt, I wanted to ask you, I was a little bit into I buy comics territory, but I watched the trailer for the new Spider-Verse movie coming out.

Is this the sequel to the movie?

The animated movie?

Yeah, I haven't seen it, but go.

Did you see the first one?

Yeah, I saw the first one.

It was fucking excellent, right?

No, you didn't love it.

Oh, man, I thought it was great.

It's okay.

It's okay.

I didn't love it as much as people were raving about it and loved it.

Couldn't get enough of it.

Where I was kind of like.

I saw it day one, so I think I avoided a lot of that hype before I was able to form my own kind of opinion.

So they released a trailer for the second one.

Looks great.

Has Spider-Man 2099, which is like I love it.

But like there are literally thousands of spider-men in this movie and i can't help but start feeling that

we've gone too far with the multiple characters like it it just seems like every comic book character now has four variants where you're like how what makes the first one special if like there's endless fucking other ones like i got miles morales i was on board with miles morales but like now it's just like hundreds of spider-men i'm like what is the fucking what makes Peter Parker special?

Like

all the Batman going around?

I don't know, man.

Like, I'm just wondering if, like, have they, is it something that would bother you, or that you look like you've never really thought about this too much?

It works for Green Lantern because they're space cops.

Yeah, it does.

Even though eight Green Lanterns from Earth is a bit much, but sure.

But at least, like, it works.

You know, I feel like it's a business decision because this way you can have a Spider-Man that looks like, or that like every

person out there can be like, oh, well, okay, so 2099, that's Hector, right?

That's Miguel O'Hara.

Okay, yeah.

And

you got Miles Morales.

So you have a Spider-Man, you know, for every person out there to identify with.

I'm drones in for a devil's beat writer.

I so I don't know.

I'm so checked out on

the new stuff, the movies and the comics.

And

it feels like

it's passed me by, like, very much like music has passed me by.

And pop culture, like current pop culture.

Yeah, you're just giving up.

It has, yeah, it has really made me go, like,

I don't know if it's, if it's made for me anymore, which is fine.

Yeah, sure, okay.

You know, it's made for people.

Well, where's Walt Flanagan's variant then?

If everybody's getting one, where's yours?

What, like the old school?

Yeah.

I don't know if there is one.

They don't care.

You know what?

I mean, my

demographic

is probably the least cared about demographic on the planet regarding everything.

We just slipped out of it.

Not just pop culture.

People cared what we thought advertisers, anyway, up until 54, I think the age is.

And then at 55, they're like, fuck you.

Go somewhere and die.

Yeah, whatever.

Some metamusil, go get out of here.

Unless you're trying to sell me a grand pad.

I get iPad.

Yeah,

your voice means nothing.

I'm screaming into the void, Q.

Did you feel your voice ever mattered?

Or is this a new feeling?

Personally.

Yeah.

Personally, no,

but like my age group and my demographic, I think at one point, yeah, I had a very loud voice.

But not you.

But not me personally, no.

I don't think, you know, I i don't feel like

anybody cares nobody cares because nobody does he's right yeah

wait a straight white man is talking and he's over 50 let's listen to what he has to say

what happened to like people appreciating wisdom we got wisdom and life experiences i don't know tempanada

what happened to people appreciating that though it seems did you you felt you appreciated it when you were when

when I was the target demographic.

Yeah.

Did you appreciate the wisdom of elders?

You were like, fuck off, old man.

If I had to be honest,

you know, I was that guy screaming to get out of the way, old man.

Yeah.

Get the fuck out of the way before I fucking push you down.

I remember the young Walt Flanagan

fire brand from Broad Street.

Yeah.

Pushing old guys to the side.

You know, I'm going to stuff a sock down your throat if you don't shut the fuck up because I don't care what you have to say.

I was a rebel.

He was pretty emphatic about it.

Yeah, I know.

It is true, though.

Like, you think back to

your late teens, your 20s, and how much you think people older than you, like, how much you, or how little you think they know.

No.

And then when you get older.

How little I care about what they have

to say.

Yeah, that's

probably more accurate.

I don't think I ever was like, you don't know shit.

I was just like, I don't care what you think right, all I care is what I want to do or how I think

which is I don't know.

I mean, I guess it's changed

That's the ignorance of youth, right?

Yeah, for sure, you know, I would think though that like we could kind of beat that out of

you know kind of lose that but it seems like it's like it's just ingrained in us as like the youth always just want to tune out

yeah you know there's something there's some there's some sort of hubris amongst the youth, ourselves included, that like you think you know shit, you've nothing to base it on,

you know, but you mouth off about it, and then you look back and you cringe at your own behavior at times.

I remember cringing a few a bit of my own behavior.

Yeah, like I wish there were like, I just wish there was that technology where you could just sit yourself down and have a chat with yourself when you're younger.

Is there one experience to sum up

like that you can recall that like kind of really

is an example of a young BQ

just not

being

appreciative enough of his elders.

Yeah, I think about it all the time that because

my grandparents died when I was in my mid-20s.

That's pretty old.

Sal's grandma's still alive.

Yeah, I got that.

I think you were lucky then to have grandparents at that time.

Mid-20s?

They died in there.

I think that's pretty.

Mid-20s?

That means that they had to be pretty up there, though.

Yeah, my grandmother didn't die until I was 40, I think.

That's very lucky.

I think mid-20s is kind of like

maybe average, if not on the

well, whatever.

But neither here nor there.

I, I, because like, I remember not

being as invested in spending time with family at that age because who the fuck is?

And now I look back at it as like,

man, I wish I had known how precious those years were when everybody you ever loved is still alive and around and like,

like, willing to.

And what am I?

I'm playing fucking Nintendo in the basement.

Like, you're like, I should have gone to my grandparents every fucking day and, like, got, you know, when she was in the hospital towards the end, like, I went like once every two weeks or something like that.

And it's just like, man, that actually hurts.

The numerical cart came out.

What are you supposed to do?

Like, why wasn't I there?

Why wasn't I there fucking four times a week sitting with my grandmother?

And this should be played in every classroom, this episode of TSD, because that is a nugget of fucking wisdom.

It's like, yeah, you just brought back.

Like, there is a point in all our lives where everybody we knew was alive.

It was alive.

Yeah.

And we didn't appreciate it.

Did not.

And it kills me now that I didn't appreciate that.

It's like, it's the one big regret in my life.

It's just like, man, I wish I had just.

And the only things I learned from that, so like the older I get, the more I appreciate the people around me.

Like, I make efforts to see my family, you know what I mean?

And stuff like that.

Whereas, I don't know, from that lesson, but it is, it's, fuck, man, that's the big regret.

I wish I can go back and change, like, spending more time with them.

I've tried, because, you know, I think about the same thing with Pam and Edgar.

I've like maybe the past year or so.

Yeah.

I'm like, wow, they are getting up in age.

And, like, I don't go over there that much.

So, like, I do try to go over a little bit more now and then.

But, like, I went yesterday, and i'm sitting there and i'm like this has to be the most mundane idiotic conversation being had on the entire earth at this exact moment i'm like what the are we even talking about i'm gonna go home and play nintendo i might as well go home and play nintendo yeah yeah yeah i've i've had i've had that i've had that experience yeah because

i'm just like why did i come over and it's like i guess it's just quality over quantity you know you just

yeah like i think about sage a lot I'm like, I want to spend a lot of time with Sage because, you know, I think back to it, you know, Walt, it's like one minute they're fucking six, and then all of a sudden they're 16, and you're like, whoa, wait, wait a second.

It's so fast.

Like, Mary Beth's been cutting the old Tell him Steve Daves, and I heard a commercial that I did with Sage, and her voice is so tiny.

Oh, yeah, it's so little, yeah,

versus now booming and stomping down the fucking hallway to beat me up.

Yeah, really,

Yeah.

Yeah, I think that's, I mean, that's no wonder.

Like we were looking at the demographics of the YouTube live, like who was watching.

We have almost no kids.

Like nobody under the age of 20, I think, listens to us at all.

And

if you do email Walt and be like, I'm repping for the under-20 crowd.

I think there has to be some in there, like at least a few in their 20s, maybe in the 20s.

Well, when I did that college show, there were a bunch of people with Tell them Steve Dave shirts on, and they were clearly college kids.

Yeah, I think there are a few.

Yeah.

But, you know, I wouldn't.

The ladies continue to hunt.

I wouldn't chase them as hard as I would the gray hairs, though.

Right.

They're not.

They cater to the gray hairs, I think.

So we won't get on a TikTok star rupp.

We're going to have on Buzz Aldrin, who I don't even remember.

This guy was already 40 by the time you were born.

Jeez, Louise.

I found out Mary Beth's type.

It took me a while.

Is that you?

Well,

we're watching Little House on the Prairie, right?

Shockingly.

Oh, wait.

Yes,

I've continue.

I have something later.

And all of a sudden, it struck me because, like, you know, she likes certain characters more than others.

And there was an episode.

Do you remember Mr.

Edwards?

I didn't watch the show.

But you know who Victor French is, right?

Victor French.

Yes.

I was like, if you, I said to her, I was like, if you lived back in little, Little House on the Prairie times, I was like you would have fucked Mr.

Edwards wouldn't you and she's like what what are you talking about and starts like laughing you know when girls really wouldn't have fucked somebody they'd be like oh like there's a different reaction yeah like there's a there's a certain level of disgust or you're stupid or like shut up it was just laughing and giggling like might as well wear a sign saying I'd fuck that guy I'd fuck Mr.

Edwards yeah and then I thought about it and I was like well I guess if she was gonna fuck anybody on Little House on the Prairie I would prefer it to be Mr.

Edwards he's had his share of Michael Landon.

No, Pa's a fucking,

he's this guy.

Pa's too fucking sanctimonious, always doing the right thing,

shit, you know, and always letting you know.

Always got a lesson to teach you.

That's our job.

If we don't impart our wisdom to all the dopes,

then we're actually guilty.

As guilty, yeah.

He did.

There was a recent episode where

Charles Ingalls had to help Victor French get off the sauce because

Mr.

Edward's son died and he got murdered.

That's the weird thing about Little House on the Prairie.

You know, you say it sucks.

And a lot of it does.

I've seen only snippets.

I can't even, I would be just as guilty of

the youth.

Yeah.

You know, to be like, oh, it sucks, even though I've never sampled a second of it.

It just, to me, it just looks like something I would not enjoy.

Dude, it's all over the place.

There's like, there's one two-part special episode where Laura's baby dies and the whole town turns against the doctor saying like it's his fault.

Witchcraft?

No, no, no, not witchcraft, just like he wasn't attentive enough.

Laura's acting like totally irrational.

And then the fucking next episode is

Mr.

Edwards happens upon this old guy who is in the woods and the guy's like, oh, I feel bad.

I'm dying.

I need you to take care of my daughter.

And she's only three, and the guy's, and he's like, all right.

Can we call, can we get bring back in the devil's beat, right?

You're going to love it, though.

Go ahead, go ahead.

As it turns out, this three-year-old is an orangutan.

Oh, wow.

All right.

Go on.

Yeah, he had a three-year-old orangutan, and the guy dies, so Mr.

Edwards has to take care of it.

And, of course, the town kids love it.

It goes to school and everything, but it smacks Nancy, which is Nelly's replacement.

And

Nancy and Mrs.

Olson want it killed, so the sheriff comes to town to kill it.

And Mr.

Edwards has fake something where he shoots it with a shotgun and it plays dead.

But then they figure out that

he's still alive.

So the sheriff comes back to kill him again.

And they bring him out

behind the house, and they're like, we have no choice.

We got to shoot this orangutan because he attacked the girl.

But really, he just gave her like this light little slap on the cheek.

And they fucking fire the gun off and you're just as the circus guy arrives too, like the guy who's who's there to take the road away the orangutan to the circus.

And they hear the gun fire just as he pulls up and everybody's all sad and shit.

And then the sheriff comes out and he's like, Edwards, go get that dad burned monkey of yours.

He ran away and he's in a tree.

Right after a baby dies from I'm assuming Sids.

or whatever.

And then there was one where like, what is going on?

Mary's baby, Mary had a miscarriage, and then Mary's baby died in a fire.

And then one of the episodes after that was solely dedicated to Laura having a goat that liked to butt people, like, whenever they bent over.

They would be like,

like, make this music.

The fucking writer's like, they're making my episode.

I can't believe it.

The goat's head would cock, and he would stare at the person's ass, and then he would just charge at them.

This is a very light-hearted episode

to kind of make up for all the fucking heavy ass shit.

I like the fucking writers' room.

The one guy's like, and then the baby dies in a fire.

And it's like, it's really sad.

Anybody got anything else?

All right.

Great follow-up.

Give that man a raise.

That's the same guy who did the goat butting episode.

The goat butting.

I was like, what is going on?

It was so out of nowhere.

Just like that was the entire focus was this they button people as soon as they bent over

for like 45 minutes.

I love it.

That's the episode I want to see.

Yeah, that was pretty great.

Walt, I know you want to live forever.

Oh, I thought you had something about Little House, though.

Oh, no, not about Little House.

Is that Little House inspired me to take a trip down a road I hadn't really gone down before?

How up to date are you guys on Columbo?

Are you guys?

What the fuck, dude?

That's my jam.

I never watched that.

Me and Gidham fucking like we studied Columbo.

I doubt.

He said, me and Gidham have a theory that Columbo is definitely on the spectrum.

I don't know, man.

He's so,

I mean, yeah, he comes off that way for sure.

Yeah.

With the fucking, with all the weird shit he does, but like, isn't he a genius, though?

He's in Giddam?

Yeah.

Debatable.

No, I don't mean geniuses in like, I mean, like, he's putting all that on to

trick people.

You could think it's maybe a method that he uses, or it could be this is just who he is.

I see.

I always have the understanding that that's who his personality is.

Like, he's not putting on any show for anybody.

Like, he's this very unusual,

super intelligent,

like

master detective.

Okay, well look, I just watched the first one.

Oh, the first one's good.

Oh, yeah.

That fucking writer talking down to him the entire fucking time.

I'm like, is that what this whole show is?

And he's very young in that, right?

Yeah.

And that's the one where the guy goes out in a boat and he had all the candlesticks and like because the weight on the plane wasn't, he killed his wife, right?

No, he was writing books with...

He he was an author, and his co-author wanted to break off with him.

And so he killed him.

It's interesting that they show the murder first.

Yeah, that's the thing that all the Columbos are like that.

Oh, all right.

They show the murder first, and then you, and then you see how Columbo pieces it together.

I'm in.

I watched the first one, and I'm like, I'm fucking in on Columbus.

You're gonna love it.

It's really good.

I have the whole collection at a home.

So, yeah.

I'm in.

It's on Hulu Trip.

Hulu or something.

Yeah.

I was like, wow, this is fucking really good.

How come nobody's done Columbo again?

Like,

our thesis that we were going to write, me me and Gidam, about why he was, we felt he was on the spectrum is like there's so many instances when you see almost every episode, there's something he does that Giddam will look and be like, yep, check, check.

And I'll look at him and be like, he goes, yes, that's a check.

Yeah, well, the thesis was almost published in TV SDB, but

I cut short by feeding.

You'll notice he has an inclination to only eat one type of food.

Okay, chili.

Well, he was making an omelette in this episode.

Later on, though, you'll see

he goes for chili a lot.

With fun results?

He won't get a new car.

Okay.

Drives a piece of shit.

Does it go into his personal life ever, or it's all just on the car?

He talks about his wife, but you never really see her.

You never see her.

And he has a dog that he brings with him around once in a while.

But his car, his attire, it's very, very similar to what

I see.

Because

you don't need to upgrade anything because everything works perfectly as is.

I don't need to upgrade.

This works fine.

I love the casting because that eye is really like noticeable.

The glass eye.

Is it glass?

It's just a straight-up glass eye.

Yeah.

That's fucking wow.

They're not going to do that today.

They're not going to get some short dude, some short, mumbly dude with a glass eye and make him the lead.

Yeah, in the 70s.

In the 70s, Hollywood was not scared off by glass eyes.

You had Sammy Davis Jr.

Right, you're right.

You had Peter Falk.

Yeah.

It was a

different era, but yeah, I think you're right.

I think a lot of actors and actresses would have, like Sandy Duncan,

would have had a bit more hurdles

in 2023

to get a starring gig

with a glass eyes.

I'm getting fucking old because I'm fucking tuning into Colombo.

I want a Colombo update.

All right, we'll do it.

Every episode you watch one, and you're just going to give me your special ones.

Well, it's cool.

Like, the seasons are short.

They're movies.

They're not episodes.

I I didn't realize that.

Yeah, well, it was

he was part of a rotating Sunday night

show called the Sunday Night Mystery Movie.

Oh, so like every fourth week,

every fourth week would be a Columbo episode, and then the other Sundays would be filled with like Macmillan and wife, McCloud,

and a Jack.

They could suck a dick, though, because Columbo's the man.

Well, McCloud's pretty good.

McLeod's pretty good.

And Macmillan and wife was Rock Hudson, bro.

Come on.

Rock Hudson.

You're right, I guess.

Dope.

Dude, fucking was thick.

Smooth as fuck.

What was it you said?

What's that?

What was that smooth line you said?

Smooth than you know.

So smooth you don't even know.

You don't even know.

And he's the inspector of police in San Francisco.

Yeah, all right.

Well, now it's

who has to have his wife solve every case.

And she never gets paid for it, though.

She never gets any credit.

It's Macville and Wife.

It's Macmillan and a wife.

I can't remember what her name was, but she was gorgeous, though.

I can't remember what her name was, though.

Well, I'll keep you up to date on Combo.

One mystery down, many more together.

What's really interesting about Colombo is that it gets canceled in the 70s and comes back in the late 80s into the early 90s.

That's the version I remember seeing

when I was a kid.

Those are hated, though.

Hated.

In the Colombo files, why?

Colombo fans, like, because they don't have the same,

you can't recapture that

glory of the 70s Colombos and the 80s because they're playing to

like, well, we got them updated a little bit more for a more sophisticated crowd of the 80s,

which is bullshit.

You know, they're just putting in more of the things that were prevalent in the 80s

trying to play to an audience.

Yeah, and it just didn't work.

The writing wasn't as smart either.

Oh, all right, okay.

I remember him being a little older.

That was that error.

Towards the end, too, like, he was dealing with a lot of mental faculty issues as he was getting older.

Alzheimer's and so on.

So, yeah, he had a lot of difficulty on set, like, remembering the lines, though.

Oh, well, that's

fun.

A little sad note.

Let's get him out there anyway, though.

Hustle him out there.

Yeah.

Let me read this to you real fast.

Walt.

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Gidem is not here right now, but I know Gidem is our Care of guinea pig who has never been healthier.

We just watched him perform some sports activities for a Patreon show.

Q.

You would be surprised at the athleticism.

Really?

Yeah.

Well, that makes me happy.

It's stunning.

It's all due to the care of.

Oh, very great.

Yeah.

Well, when he was at my birthday party, was he trying this stuff then?

Yeah, I noticed him.

He was dancing some stuff.

He was dancing.

He was dancing with some girls.

They were checking him out.

He ran the,

I think it was the

hour and a half mile just recently.

Yeah.

An hour and a half?

Yeah, huh?

All right.

It's great.

He's under 90 minutes.

I think it was 88 minutes.

I think he got it.

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Okay, so

you got your care of.

And then scientists are studying centigenarians, Walt.

You know, people that grow to be older than 100.

Right.

And they have highly functional immune systems that successfully fought off and recovered from many ailments.

So a very highly functioning immune system is one thing.

Oh, okay.

And in other news, the sky is blue, water is wet.

Wait a second.

A person's ability to adapt and respond to new infections usually declines with age as their immune system weakens, and the ones that they observed confirms a long history of exposure to infections and the capacity to recover from them.

So the more sick they got, the longer they're living, it appears.

Who wrote this article?

Did you get it on like...

No, this is in the post.

Such engineerians and their exceptional longevity provide a blueprint for how we might live more productive, healthful lives.

They noted, wait a second,

their findings showed a proportion of lymphocytes, a type of white blood cell in the centenarians

decreased compared to younger people, but I don't know.

Now I lost my place.

But anyway, look at this.

Don't you want to look like this lady someday?

Absolutely.

She's 100%.

She's 100%.

That's my target right there.

Oh, I'll tell you what.

She's 100 years old.

She looks like that.

She looks better than a fucking dead 20-year-old.

Boom.

Yeah.

Boom.

There's a

futurist, Ray Kurzweil,

has claimed that humans will achieve immortality by 2030.

2030?

That's pretty soon.

Pretty close.

Oh, Jimmy.

If they just make it another seven years.

Look, man, yes, there's that lady you showed me who doesn't look like the picture of health.

No.

Then there's Buzz Aldrin,

who may have, like,

you know,

be the most healthy-looking 90-something-year-old I've ever seen.

Let me take a look at this guy.

Shatner's 91.

He looks good, too.

Yeah.

Yeah, but they both went into outer space, though.

Oh, you're right.

So maybe there's something like to that spending some time.

Well, Shatner didn't go to outer space, did he?

I thought he went up in a rocket, wasn't he?

I mean, real life.

I don't mean Star Trek.

Yeah, no, no.

I mean, did it go to outer space?

Oh, I thought it just went to the top of the atmosphere.

There's old Buzz and his fucking hot young bit.

Shit, she's pretty fucking good looking.

He looks happy.

Yeah, he does, right?

Yeah.

He's not on the internet fucking on TSD cares.

No.

Shitting all over us.

Look at that wife.

I know.

And again, I ask you, though,

he looks fantastic.

He looks great.

He looks fantastic.

But

if he didn't fucking step foot on the moon, can he get that?

Doesn't matter.

No way.

He did step on the moon.

So who gives a shit?

I know.

I know it's wrong.

They'd be so bitter.

I think so.

Why Buzz Aldrin?

Why not me?

Because the things that made him be the man that goes to the moon

are in him.

They're in him.

The bravery.

Yeah.

The sacrifice.

The fucking manliness.

Is that one of the things that you can drop?

There's no topping that if you're at the bar and you're trying to impress.

I went to the moon?

Yeah.

I've got a 12-inch dick.

Can you top it?

But if you're like, well, I was on a television show.

Yeah, I was on a practical joker.

Hey, girls.

Sadly, I don't know.

I don't know that kids.

The average bar that they walk into.

I don't know what that is.

You can't beat Alphazalt.

St.

Patty's Day, 2023, New York.

I think kids would be like, not comparing me to that.

I think kids would be like...

We didn't even go to the moon, old man.

Get out of it.

Like, it would just be like bullshit.

Well, then it'd be fucking a shitstorm because he's no.

I know, he swings.

I mean, if I was in a bar and I was a female, it would certainly be enough to get me to fuck him.

Really?

Yeah, that guy went to the moon.

So if it was a 93-year-old female astronaut, you've seen me make out what fucking 60-something-year-old man.

That was 20 years ago.

Yeah, that was just some woman.

Would you be Sally Rise?

She's alive?

Would you be annoying him for information, you know, leading up to the act?

Or would you like play it cool?

I would want.

I'd want to ask him all the questions.

I want to know.

I want to know what it's like

to be on the moon.

Yeah.

The moon.

And what if he was just like, look,

I've had a couple, so I'm going to tell you.

It never really happened.

They all think we've been up there.

There's a super cut.

There is a super cut of him on like, like, saying some really fucked up shit.

Oh, yeah.

Like that make you go.

Maybe we didn't go.

Maybe we didn't go.

You got to stop saying that if you want him on the show.

Rup's never going to get him if you, if you.

Well, I'm going to ask him about the super cut, though, that I had that I've seen, where he's on Conan O'Brien.

There's a super cut.

Which I wonder where you get your hair done.

He's on Conan O'Brien, and Conan O'Brien's interviewing him, and he's going, you know, I got up at, you know, my parents got me up

when you landed on the moon, and I watched it, and he goes, you didn't watch it.

He goes, it wasn't on TV.

We never went to the moon.

He actually says that.

Really?

What does Conan O'Brien say?

Conan O'Brien just wants to get off the subject and like wants to steer it back towards, well, you mean it wasn't on TV?

He goes, no, what you watched was a recreation.

It wasn't televised.

He doesn't say we don't go to the moon.

He goes, it wasn't televised.

You didn't see what you saw was a recreation.

Wow.

He goes, no, no, no, I watched it.

He goes.

And Corona Bryan changes the fucking subject so quickly because he doesn't know what to make of him just throwing this out there.

I don't know what he doesn't want to get fucking popped

by some fucking men in black after the show tapes.

Scorsese made that, they say?

Kubrick.

Kubrick made it.

Kubrick.

Yeah.

Oof.

If that was true, if we did go to the moon, but we faked it for television, does that have devastating effects?

Yeah?

Because you can't.

They win.

I know, but the very fact that you lied about this makes everything in question then.

There's nothing I can believe then about it.

I feel that way anyway without the moon thing.

This part's true, but this part isn't true.

Uh-oh, this is true.

Nope, that part's not true.

And I can't believe any of it then.

If you lied about this, you'll lie about anything.

But the government's lied about things.

They have.

So you can't believe anything.

I don't.

An anti-vaxxer in our mix.

Here we go.

I knew it.

I'm very skeptical.

You know,

it's something that I can't help.

You know,

when I see some fibbing going on, you know, I'm not one of those people that can just be like, just ignore it.

You know, it's just hard.

to ignore when you know someone's lying straight to your face.

Shit, man.

That's deep.

Well, that's what TSD is about.

That's why the kids can't appreciate it.

Discussions that scare off a 20-year-old.

It's too much for them to handle.

There was an Ohio school bus driver.

I'm normally,

I don't like school crossing guards, as you know.

Yeah, you've had your issues.

They're usually a little neutral on bus drivers.

This lady I like.

She went viral for a foul-mouth tirade at students.

She said that she was going to, in her rant, she said she was going to start kicking some fucking serious ass because she was done with the shit.

Wow.

Followed by at least two years of needling by a core group of kids on her Amherst route.

Can you imagine, kids?

That's your life being mocked by kids for two straight years.

She said she was sorry for the way it went down.

It was a particularly challenging day after a student sprayed some perfume and sparked a horrible asthma attack, but

she apologized, blah, blah, blah.

She was interviewed by a local outlet at a local clothing store that created a t-shirt about the episode and donated $5 from all sales to the now jobless driver because, you know, she started

cursing and all that other stuff.

So the shirt says, my foot's going to be so far up your ass, it's going to dangle from your nose.

I guess that's one thing that she said.

And it's a picture of a school bus on the shirt.

They made $60,000.

Wow.

That's a lot of shirts.

To donate to her.

That is a lot of shirts, right?

Yeah.

The fundraiser was to help her pay for some time off and for all her years of dedicated service.

So

everybody came to you.

That's a feel-good story, right, Walt?

Yes, and no, because it's like, you know, she went out like losing her shit, though.

I mean, it's like.

Losing her job?

No, losing her, like being very unprofessional.

Oh, but isn't that the way you want to go out?

If you're tired of your job?

Yeah, but usually you don't have people stepping up.

Remember when you left the staff?

You said to Mike, I'll shove my foot so far up in your ass it's going to dangle from your nose?

But usually you don't have people stepping up to sell shirts on your your behalf when you have to curse out a bunch of kids.

Very unusual.

They must, like, this area, they must be like, we know these kids.

They are total assholes.

Let's raise money for the school bus driver.

I think school bus drivers should have more leniency than teachers would like if kids are acting up.

Since it's like, you know, you're driving around, you should be able to smack the shit out of them.

We had a school bus driver that picked me up on South Railroad for junior high school who was, you didn't fuck with him.

He would fucking take you, you, he'd put you off the bus.

I'm not kidding, he'd be like, walk, you're walking, and you would have to get off the bus, and you'd be late for school, and then and then you'd get in trouble.

That's a he did it all the fucking time, he'd just pull over and throw kids off the bus.

He never got in trouble, no, his name was Ed.

Ed.

The 80s was different.

Yeah, this was the late 80s.

The 80s was in the Wild West when you're dealing with kids, yeah.

And you would just see, and then, of course, like the kid would be on the side of the road, and we'd all be like,

and then drive off.

Yeah,

You're right.

It's the 80s.

Like today, that would be like, it would be a major news story.

They get arrested.

The bus, the school would be sued.

That kid though gets fucking hurt or, God forbid, killed on the side of a road or something.

I think the bus hammer's like, I was tired of their shit.

I did not give a fuck.

I saw a news article that intrigued me.

I know a lot of people think

that

Americans are getting dumber

yeah

and there was a study that says it's absolutely true that iqs are going down

wow because of the pandemic i don't know what they equate it to but

you know it it really you know

solidifies how lucky we are you know to be surrounded by you know to be to have a 148 in our midst because a lot of people are dealing with

only do you a bunch of good

in terms of furniture building and such.

I don't know how much good it does us.

It's never actually done anything for me.

I'm telling you, if you need a fire pit built, you know,

I mean, he put it together like in fucking three hours, man.

He got that shit done.

I'm all right.

I'll send him your way.

I'll send them up to Q's.

I'm all right.

I know.

I won't get them only in my house as a guest.

You're handy, man.

Yeah, I don't want him there.

Oh, yo, I'm doing.

I mean, there's got to be shit that you don't like putting together, right?

I just, I'll pay someone to do it.

It just won't be getting them.

You won't even have to.

You already are paying them.

Are you on them watching Columbo with me, or maybe putting something together at your house?

That's a good point when you put that to you.

Yeah.

Get an oil change or something.

Get an oil change out of them.

But yeah, what do you think?

What do you think the

educational system?

I think so.

That's a combination of the educational system, the internet is now a huge distraction for nobody has any

focus anymore nobody's got any ability to fucking nobody yeah nobody has any like cognitive reasoning anymore nobody has any critical thinking anymore they just fucking jump on shit yeah and they're like they hear like read a headline and you're either going to be pissed or you're going to be excited

do you feel it's worse now than it's ever been because

i kind of feel more aware of it yeah yeah i feel i feel more aware of like what like everybody's really worked up about and it seemed like people got like in the 70s like people got worked about worked up about like, you know, the oil crisis and hostages and like big events.

You know, not every fucking little thing like a bus driver cursing out some kids.

Whereas now it's just like it's like people pay attention and are led to pay attention to stupid shit.

So I think we don't focus on the bigger people.

You look at the advent of like these apps like TikTok and what's the other one?

Well, there's TikTok, Instagram, Twitter.

I mean, TikTok definitely has

like the MTV, they say the MTV generation had shortened attention spans because of the way everything was edited, you know, like in these quick bursts and stuff.

And I think things like that.

I think we're the MTV generation, aren't we?

Not a way.

What?

No.

We were there when it fucking burst.

No, the 90s.

I think the 90s are more of an MTV generation.

Like that's when they started with all the TV shows and stuff, not so much the videos.

And that's when they started that style of editing that real fast.

Like people like Nichelle, he worked on MTV in the 90s, fucking reprogramming kids' brains.

And I think now, like, with TikToks, they're even shorter, and you can go through them so quickly that it's just, it has to do something to you.

It has to, right?

There's just no.

The short attention span you believe is

detrimental

to society.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

I find even I have a hard time sitting through like a, like a two-hour movie.

If I see a movie's two hours, I'm like, what?

Why?

Like, I want to see John Wick, and it's like in theaters.

And I'm like, but three hours in a theater?

I'm like, God damn it.

That's a lot to ask.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't know.

It's like the, the, we're just not prepared.

I don't think humanity was prepared to be.

I don't think the human brain is meant to care about

it.

Everything.

Like, it's just, it's, you just, it's not built that way.

And

but

do you think it's bad for people to get hooked on like 10-second videos?

Like, you know, just somebody does,

you know, just like you, you eat them almost like candy.

Yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't know if bad's the right word.

I don't think it's good.

It's like unhealthy for your

minds.

I just remember, and you guys know more than anything, like we didn't grow up with phones and email, and like there was, you weren't connected so much, and it's just like, it's not better.

And I know it sounds like anybody could say, like, well, you're a fucking old man.

So this is the way it was.

But it's just like, I'm telling you, I've experienced both.

It's not better.

It is not better.

It is not better to have work be able to get you 24 hours a day, people be able to get to you, your mind able to reach out and get you.

It's just like, it's not good.

It eliminates so much of like what the human experience was for thousands of years is over.

And we have no idea what the effects of it are going to be.

And now this fucking AI shit coming in, too.

It's like every 10 years, there's some society destroying technology.

Yeah, I thought they were giving up on the AI chat after they turned it racist like a year or so ago.

And now it came back in a different way.

And

now people have AI writing stuff for them.

Yeah.

Like that Cardiff Potato guy I was telling you about.

They're messing around on some podcast and he had AI write him a legal document.

It was like three pages long.

But it's not recognized by the law, is it?

I think once it's signed, it's you know.

It's signed into law?

No, I mean, it's it's if it's a if it's a document, like a legal document,

then yeah, it's a contract.

Oh, I don't know.

I mean, that is going to change everything in the next 20 years.

The deep fakes, too.

The deep fakes.

It's only like within the next five years, you're going to be like, I can't believe Walt Flanagan said that.

He sent Bri a picture of his boss.

Like, the deep fakes look good now.

Yeah, they look amazing now.

Yeah, it's pretty fucking crazy.

Is it worth one

brain cell of you worrying about it, though?

Me?

I don't have kids, so no.

If I had kids, I'd be worried.

Okay, tell me why I should be worried because I'm not worried about it because I'm

somebody else's problem.

That's not my bitch.

Right, but that's the somebody else you're talking about is your daughter.

That's who you're talking about.

Why?

What do they got to worry about?

It's their problem.

It's like they're the ones that have to live in this world.

Their kids.

And their kids.

Like, not only.

A world where they...

I understand what you're saying.

Like, okay, where they don't have to do any homework.

They can just program a computer to do their homework, right?

I'm saying we're not smart enough or experienced enough to know what the negative effects are going to be yet.

Forget Terminator.

If you're able to create realistic fucking girlfriends that say anything that you want to say,

like, humanity is going to break down.

Why the fuck?

What do you mean?

I mean,

how many generations of this artificial intelligence do you think it is before somebody falls in love with Chat GPT, whatever the fuck's out there, and is able to have a relationship with this thing?

And then come the sex robots, which I'm all for.

Don't get me wrong.

I just.

I'm like Bruce Aldrin.

I'll marry one when I'm 93.

I hope that fucking sex robots are in shape before I die.

I think the prototypes are out there right now.

Grab like your real doll type stuff.

And then they're automated.

I'm talking the ones that can chat with, talk to you, and fucking get back to you,

can anticipate and get creative.

You can put them in the closet like Vicky if you felt like it.

Yeah, all that shit's coming in.

Small wonder?

Yeah, there you go.

There's a reference for everyone.

Did I get the kids?

She wouldn't get it.

I got that.

Oh, yeah.

I did.

Oh, God.

Yeah, Vicky.

Vicky the robot.

Yeah, I expect one of the best Halloween costumes I ever saw at the cargo was this girl dressed like Vicky.

Oh, really?

Yeah, it was pretty cool.

She had the lights in the back of the title.

Again, I haven't heard

why I should have sleepless nights for my children because of the way.

Well, you think the world's headed in a fine direction.

But is it

no, but that's due to other things.

I'm not worried about AI

so much.

Well, not just AI.

Not just AI.

I mean, the whole

arc of what we're doing right now just seems so anti-human.

I wouldn't want to grow up in the world as it is now compared to what we had.

Like, let alone...

Well, like your grandchildren say with rewritten books and reimagine this.

Yeah, but

I can't can't get up for that, man.

I can't, like, if they have to read a book that they probably don't want to read anyway, and it has some words taken out, I don't think that they will be outraged.

I can't be outraged about that.

I just can't.

I can't get my

dander up about it.

I think it's stupid, but I don't care about that.

I think, like, I don't know, man.

I think that we don't know what the harmful effects of all this artificial intelligence are going to be.

They're coming.

Like, anybody who says, like, well, it's only positives for humanity with that technology.

That's what I was saying.

But why?

You don't see any way that that could be misused?

Look, it's been we've been dealing with it since we were since we were born.

What do you mean?

We've been dealing with the fallout of

technology replacing human beings.

How did you deal with that as a kid?

Well, we've seen it.

We've seen my father was, you know,

he you know, he would turn the he would turn the makeup at Charles of the Ritz with a broomstick handle.

You can't even say what the street is.

Then they got a machine, a mixer.

They used to have been better.

Then they got a machine.

Replaced by a pterodactyl.

And then they got the big mixing machine that eliminated his job.

And now we've dealt with that.

Yeah, but the mixing machine didn't...

affect his mind.

It just made him find a different

level of work.

It made him sad that he was replaced by a machine.

It definitely affected

his.

Okay, now times that by a billion

with every job getting replaced and humans getting replaced.

Yeah,

this has been going on since we were since

rises before we were a billionaire.

So we really saw it with the automotive industry.

We saw the automotive industry go from

this has been going on.

Like this is just the natural order of things.

But it's not the natural order of things.

Technology continues.

But it's not the natural order of things.

All right, well, the technology is always going to advance.

You can't stop it.

Walt desperately wants an overlord.

But

not all technology is good.

You would say the atomic bomb was a good fucking thing?

It saved a lot of lives.

Did it?

Yeah, it saved a lot of American lives.

At the end of a war that was wrapping up anyway,

we bombed a country full of babies and children with a nuclear weapon, and you think that's cool?

Like, yeah, no problem.

You think that it would have been ⁇ what do you think the casualty, American casualties would have been, Allied casualties would have been without that atomic?

I don't know.

It would have been

a lot of fun.

But I do know that the cost.

Like, you don't think that there's a moral cost to bombing an entire country of civilians?

We're the only country.

Don't start none, won't be none.

I also agree with that.

I also agree with that.

Add that to the flag.

You know, it's not as if they didn't fucking, you know.

What's the, like, the modern day of that?

It's like, fuck around and find out.

Fuck around and find out.

Welcome to the United States of America.

No, I get that too.

I get that too.

And

I think it's actually useless

to look back and judge the actions of people in the past by like today's.

I think people, that's the lowest form of thinking.

Yeah.

So, you know, you don't really want to get it.

Especially when you're going back to like, you know, to when the country was founded.

But kind of put like the moral compass of today,

you know, seeing it through the lens of

1976.

You're always going to win.

You're always

who said masturbatory?

I just said masturbatory.

I like that word.

Yeah.

It is because, like, they're not here to defend themselves.

The pass is in here to defend themselves, and you don't know how you would have acted in that situation.

So you're always right.

It's the most righteous, high-horse, moral.

Like, it's just like

the people that are like, I never would have owned a slave.

I would have turned around.

think that too.

But it's just like, you're always going to win when you're judging people who are dead 200 years.

You're just always.

So to me, it's just like, what's the fucking point?

Just jerk off.

It's maspiratory.

But I don't know that I feel comfortable with the way technology is

heading.

I think it's separated everybody.

And if you had kids, you'd be worried.

If I had kids, I'd be really worried.

I still have.

But I still haven't heard what I should be worried about.

I really respect your opinion, but I haven't even once thought about this.

But it's the unknown.

I can't even quantify it in a way that I'll make you worry because it's the unknown.

And I guess just my view of the unknown.

Are we talking about world wars?

Talking everything.

We're talking about financial collapses?

Are we just talking about now people can make,

I want a fucking ape riding a turtle, you know?

Yeah.

In Kisk makeup.

And you put that in, and then you get that picture come out of a computer.

Now, that's what AI is.

What I thought AI, your guys were talking about.

Well, now it is, but like, not,

that's what I'm saying.

We don't know what this technology is going to look like in five years, 10 years.

I thought that was cool because I was like, oh, so I could just throw

enough bumble jumble of words, and I'm going to get this fucking awesome picture back.

It's cool, but if you can't project how that technology is going to look in 20 years,

then

going back into the past, though, were we able to project how technology would

play out 20 years into the future?

Or do we just go like, let's see what happens?

Cross our fingers.

Well, obviously, there's nothing we can do.

Don't worry.

I don't think you should wear a wall.

There's no point.

I keep saying the same five things over and over again.

There's no way to.

Say what it is.

Now I'm really worried because you won't tell me.

There's no way.

Just say what it is, but like this faith that everything's going to work out when it doesn't look like everything's working out.

You have never been this guy before.

I don't have kids, so I don't give a fuck.

But

you've never been so defeated, it sounds like.

I don't think

things are not going to work out, you don't think.

I don't think that the path that things are.

Look, I'm sure it'll be fine.

It'll be fine.

So you're lying to me.

It'll be fine.

I'm telling you, we don't know what the effects of.

It probably sounds like the government.

It's going to be fine.

It's going to be fine.

What do you want?

If you don't think that the road we're on can go wrong.

Oh, I do.

But I don't know.

Well, that's the world your kids are growing in.

They're sitting on

this bomb.

Okay, so my options are

my options as a father.

Yeah.

You got to run for office.

No, I

either worry like a madman,

you know, and put myself through a lot of mental stress, worrying, and anxiety.

Right.

B,

say like, say, La Vie.

You know, you're on your own.

Yeah.

I got mine.

Yeah.

You know.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking to my kids.

That's me as your kids, like, out of context.

What the fuck are you talking about?

Say love me.

I got mine.

Good night, girls.

Well, that was confusing.

Do you think that feels okay?

We're talking about it.

Like, you know, this is the kind of stress that some people like, you know, they do horrible things.

You know, I had to take out my family because.

No, I don't think you should do that.

No, it's fine.

Because things are going, are trending.

I don't know what I'm talking about.

I don't even have examples for you.

Like, this is just a gut.

It's not an educated.

But we've lived with

wars over in other parts of the world.

We've never lived with technology being so invasive in our lives like we do now.

It's invasive, it's too much.

And it's only going to get worse and worse and worse.

There's no way it's not going to get worse.

You agree with this?

I think so.

I think you agree.

Can you tell me why I should be worried, though?

Like, what is the tangible thing?

One tangible thing that

I can

hold on to because.

Oh, it's beyond us all.

There's nothing any of us can do about it.

Or something that I should be worried about, though.

Like, like technology doing something.

Are you talking about them going Skynet?

No, I didn't want to use that example because, but that's also a possibility.

Sure.

Why don't you want to use that?

It's too terrifying.

It's just too cliche.

It's too cliche.

I think it's more insidious than that.

I think it's like a rot of the mind rather than a violence thing.

Really?

Yeah.

So you don't see robots coming after us.

I don't not see robots coming after us, but I think that the bigger problem really is just the cost of all this technology on the human experience and the human soul.

Well, it does seem like, I mean, if you're to believe all these fucking people that you see in college or high school or TikTok or Instagram, like that whole generation, like there has never been an unhappier generation who has had more at their fingertips.

And you think it's caught because of all the social media.

I think so.

I think people's expectations are so high now with everything.

Like,

you live through the 70s, and that's not like living through the fucking dust bowl, but like you lived through the 70s, it's like your expectations weren't high about a lot of things.

You were just like, all right, you know, I live a sort of a lower middle-class lifestyle, and that's not

my.

I'm not going to be a fucking influencer.

My dreams growing up were very simple, just the

family, have a house that I can afford to pay, pay my bills, bills,

enjoy my life,

get the fuck when I want.

Yeah,

right?

As a kid, that's what you're like, that's like, that would be it.

That's all you need.

Like, yeah, that's it.

That's still all you need.

And, but now, yeah, I agree that I think there are expectations and

things that like people are unhappy because that's not enough anymore.

But damn, wow, Q, you really put the...

I just don't see if you wrong the whole show down.

I'm sorry.

I mean, also, I don't know what I'm talking about.

Like, it's just a gut feeling feeling that things aren't going to go right.

And how long do you think we have before

you could be alive?

That's the thing.

But that's my kind of big point:

we just don't know what we're staring down the barrel.

We've never been in this position before.

We're in it, and the people who are handling it are fucking morons.

Like, every, like, do you have faith in anybody, that anybody's going to lasso at all this shit and get it in the right direction?

It's like it's the unknown, the genie's out of the bottle already, is the problem.

And I don't know.

We're just all going to live with it.

Can I ask when,

what was the point that made you

think this way?

Because, like I said, I don't remember him being there.

He was very

positive,

optimistic.

Yeah, I still am in a lot of ways, but I just think that's a good thing.

I think we're still living the American exceptionalism dream.

Yeah, well, I still believe that.

I don't know.

You know, something that, like, one thing that happened recently that made this chat, this, this fucking AI shit lately is like, I'm looking at it like, and I feel a little weird because I'm like, does everybody see what I'm seeing?

Like, this is crazy what's going on.

These machines are like able to mimic people.

Like, nobody sees that as a fucking step.

That's what I would do if I texted Walter Picture My Balls.

I'm like, I must have been AI.

But have you not seen these robots, though, that you guys are so worried about?

Like, they dance, and they don't even dance well.

And if you fucking tip them over,

they're done.

And now, okay, now.

But not even, you see, that one generation.

Like, the first generation was like those dancing Coke cans and cactuses and Furbies.

Now they're doing flips.

You see Those are robotic, like the dogs and the they're doing flips.

But at the end of the day, it's still stiff now.

Right now.

Talk to me in 10 years.

And you know what?

Water.

Like a fucking squirt can, you know.

They have submarines and stuff like that.

Seltter bottles.

Rust and gears.

And water.

What is the ultimate energy?

You don't think that any of that technology is going to increase as well?

They're going to be using steampunk to make these robots.

Like they'll use, they're going to develop everything to

the invisible enemy that you're worried about.

You don't think people are going to

mass make robots at some point?

Government.

Apple, a company.

You don't think that'll ever happen?

There won't be a company that comes out and mass produces robots.

For public consumption, where you can buy robots to

like a Rosie, like a robot made?

Not in our lifetime.

Not in our lifetime.

Not in our lifetime.

What about your kid's lifetime?

Not on the level that you're worried about.

Not on the level that you're worried about.

Like maybe a robot that's like, again,

it can, oh,

you want to lift some cinder blocks

and bring it over, you know, from point A to point B.

Maybe.

But I don't think we're going to see robots.

It's done.

It's done.

I don't think you're going to see robots that you

are worried about.

But I'm not really worried about it.

It's okay.

I don't care.

It doesn't matter to me what happens after I die.

What I'm saying is, like,

you guys who have kids, like, you don't know what's going to happen.

You could say that, and I could sit here and say the opposite, but we don't know what's going to happen.

But something's going to happen.

I can't worry about it, though.

Like, I got other things to worry about that are like in that little circle that, like,

if you, like you said, we're not built

to worry about these big things that, like, we can't control.

Anyway, I could worry about it and, like, you know,

really put myself through the ringer, ringer,

and I really can't do anything about it.

I guess there's nothing we can do about it, right?

That's why I got to focus on the small stuff.

Like, will Rupp really come through with that double feet writer?

Tell him, Steve, Dave.