#544: The Commish
Listen and follow along
Transcript
Mass shootings and serial killings.
Oh, so that's our fucking thing.
He has no idea what's going on.
And near nearly 90% of the audience is like, what the fuck did I tune into?
Has your father ever kissed you on the lips?
No, but he has sent me dick pics.
Okay.
See?
Just grab it.
You can always return it.
Just grab it.
Don't think about it.
Just grab it.
You can always return it.
Tell him, Steve, Dave.
Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell'em Steve Dave.
We call it the termite edition around here.
Got Walt.
Yo.
Normally Q.
No Q this week.
Yeah.
Sam, do your dumbest accent.
What's up?
I think people can tell.
It's not really Q.
We should have just went with Q is here.
I'm working.
Busy.
Everybody knows I'm busy.
The fuck?
Sunday, Jeff.
What's up?
It's been a while since you've been on a regular TSD, right?
I didn't even think this is a show anymore.
I thought we'd just do Patreon.
It's been a while since I've seen you, too.
I haven't seen you since November, right?
It feels like a long time since I've done a podcast at all.
You're my ex-elixir.
How do they say that?
Elixir?
Elixir?
Elixir.
I thought Kiddum was ex-lixer.
Oh, he's filled with ex-lixer.
Yeah, he's the opposite of an ex-elixir.
Sunday.
I'm glad you're here because I know you're a straight shooter.
Straight as they come.
No bullshit with Sunday Jeff.
Much to his you know you know that could be a detriment you know he's such a straight shooter it's caused him some problems in the past it has i'm surprised he hasn't been canceled yet to tell you the truth
politically incorrect but tonight today might be the day where you finally uh you finally shoot it canceled yep uh
there's a lot of talk in this country about cultural appropriation right
if you uh you wear a sombrero as a white person you're bad if you do your hair in dreads you're bad.
Tons of examples.
But they never talk about the appropriation of white culture.
And I think we got a case here.
Have you heard about these mass shootings out in California?
No.
You have not?
He is not a California.
I do not.
Look, I have, I'll be honest with you.
I have all news turned off of my Google.
So I don't get any of that kind of news.
You don't know what's going on around there.
Just other than what's going on with the devils and what's going on in local towns and stuff.
Sunday lives in an orbit unto himself, I believe is why he's my ex-elixir.
How do you say it?
Elixir.
I don't even know that you're using it correctly.
That's why, because he comes in.
He's not beaten down by
news.
He's not dragged down by
politics.
He's almost as if he was plucked from the Amazon, the deepest.
Like Sunday Pollyanna.
The fucking castaway?
No, like he's been plucked from some remote village where they have never seen a TV or a car.
Right.
You know, that's what he, like, he could, yeah, he's seen a TV, he's seen a car, but everything else, it's almost all new to him.
All this stuff, yeah, like, like, the most casual information that a person may come across is
beyond his scope.
I don't spend a lot of time on the internet looking at, I mean, researching news.
And it's just like, it's just
why he's got this, still got the light in his eyes.
Yeah, it's true.
That gleam.
Yeah.
There's too much stuff going on.
It's like, why?
I mean, look, it's in California.
Yes, it's sad.
It's everything.
It's just like, what else can you do, though?
I mean, life's hard enough.
There's a lot of shit going on to begin with.
I mean, now you need more shit to worry about and everything.
Your own life, you mean?
You're right.
Of course, you got
to be able to do it.
It's all about Sunday, Jeff.
Deal.
I mean, you got, look, you got to take care of your wife and kids.
You got to take care, you know, yourself.
Because if you don't, then you look what happens.
You know, come back.
So what you're saying is look out for your own.
You're like, I don't care about these people that got shot.
Whatever.
Well, my school.
If it happened to your town or your state or something like that, or something that hits close to home.
You know, I'm not saying
it's okay.
It's abstract almost.
You know,
it almost becomes like.
But
it's normal.
It's normal today.
You know, that like
when you see a lot of these news coverages, you become, I don't want to say numb, but you can become somewhat desensitized to like all this horrible news.
But this one thing that I saw yesterday oh my god I mean this is this this was
as close to crying as I came since do you remember Elizabeth Smart yes remember that girl that got taken
yeah when she was religious wackos right yeah when she was found and they reported it and they had the father um like do a news conference the day the night that like she was found and she was okay right I was like, I had tears in my eyes because that was like
amazing news.
Good tears though right because I was just like that's got to be the fucking greatest news this man will ever receive in his life and it's not the type of news that most people in his situation receive exactly that's what I'm saying like what are the odds that she would be gone for that long and then come home alive it would be like they're astronomical yeah like winning a lottery for the next like 10 years straight
would not be even enough to say, I would think, the
absolute joy he must have felt when he heard when he got that news but this was the exact opposite yesterday though was like when there was some guy that was getting beaten by the cops uh black guy right tyre nichols or something oh my god when they when they when they showed him screaming for his mother
oh my god that was it was devastating
what's up how old is he i mean that's but that just shows you what we revert back to though like i mean i could see myself they say like soldiers in battlefields are crying for their mom and stuff oh my god yeah that idea that was
brutal You would call for your mom if a bunch of cops were beating you up.
I don't even know what I would do.
My mom is like, she's probably like the worst fighter.
I would never call her.
But it's just like, it just was like,
it was bad enough, right, to see it get to see it, but then to hear him screaming for his mother.
Right.
I had to turn it off.
I couldn't even watch it.
It was too much to handle to hear this man calling for his mother.
Did you see the Pelosi footage, too?
I did.
How weird is it with the way the guys smiling when they open the door and
they make a step towards him?
Did you see the way he moved?
Totally changed.
Did you see the way the man with the hammer moved?
Yes.
I told Giddam,
I was watching that last night, and I turned to Debbie, and I was just like,
the way that that man with the hammer moves,
that's how Giddam moves.
Really?
Like, they had the same kind of movement, like that kind of awkward, like, short steps,
kind of like spasms.
Stroke Stroke ready about the pass out of something.
He could barely support his own weight steps.
Like,
if you had told me, like, you know, like blurred out that guy's face and be like, who is this?
I'd be like, let's get him.
That's just one of the way I've watched him move now over the course of the years.
Frankenstein when he first started walking around.
My original point being, though, with this cultural appropriation, is that there was a mass shooting out in California.
11 people got shot.
Then, like, within a week, I think, seven people got shot at a different
location.
Both perpetrated by Asian guys.
Now, a couple times before this, it hasn't been white guys.
This is all white guys have.
Mass shootings and serial killings.
Oh, so that's our fucking thing.
So they're stepping on our turf, huh?
Kind of, yeah.
So what do you think, Sunday?
Can I get back?
Like, who are you yelling for then?
If you're not yelling for Pam, who are you yelling for?
Oh, okay.
Who am I yelling for?
What do you think of who you're yelling for, Sunday, while he's going?
I mean,
I could see myself yelling for my mom.
I don't think so.
I think I would be
cursing at them.
Like, I'm just.
You're not yelling for Pam?
I don't think so, no.
No.
What are they going to do?
Like, maybe you just revert back.
I don't know.
Like you're saying, like, to a situation, to a position or a time in your life when you're like
the great protector was mom, and there's fucking, that's exactly the point is like, there's nobody who's going to be able to do anything.
And the only one who's ever really been there for you
for the most part, 24-7 is your mom.
Unconditionally.
Yeah.
It was brutal, brutal.
It kept on spraying them with pepper spray, though.
It's just like...
Let's go.
Let's go ahead and lighter.
What'd you do for Hanukkah and Christmas?
Could you just take a look at it?
Let's back it up a couple months.
What did I do for Christmas?
It was quick.
It was nice.
It was nice.
Hanukkah really didn't do much.
I really don't do much.
You never do, right?
How come you never pull out all the stops?
Hey, I usually forget the day.
It's just like it's, and it came, it came the same time as
Christmas, almost the same time this year.
But, you know, I really don't, like I said, it's just more of like just a get-together of friends, family, and that kind of time for me.
It's more of just like being around the pizza.
You had friends over?
I didn't get no invitation.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Well, you know why you could have come over anyways.
But I said, it's
no, I was, I was, um,
you know, I had a good time over.
Spinning it like he's trying to think.
Or why didn't I invite Walt?
Oh, you know, yeah, I was, you know, it's, I was with relatives from the bottom.
I have that candle from the Sunday.
How do you get an invite from you?
I've been invited to your place before.
We didn't pull any Christmas get-togethers this year.
Super Bowl party this year?
Maybe.
Maybe.
There you go, Sunday.
Yeah, you might get the Super Bowl invitation, though.
Yeah.
Tell you who's not, Brady.
He's not getting no invitation.
No, you're not getting the invitation.
Smart-ass
sassy man.
I don't want to go there anymore.
Who's your picks, though, for Super Bowl?
Because we're reporting this the day before the AFC and the NFC Championship.
Who's your picks to go to Super Bowl and win?
Little puck nuts.
Microsoft?
I think Philadelphia is going to win at home tomorrow.
They're playing too well.
You see the Bengals then?
I'm going to say the Bengals again.
I say the Bengals again.
So it's going to be Bengals.
They're playing good.
They didn't number to Buffalo last week.
Bengals.
And Buffalo.
Yeah, Bengals and Eagles.
Who wins it all?
I'm still going to say the Eagles.
The Eagles.
They're playing too well.
I mean, Giants played.
I didn't even think they played a game last week.
I thought thought they were practice teams.
Their coach is so obnoxious for the Eagles.
That's why I hope they lose.
I don't know if you saw him.
Well, I don't want him to win.
I just think they're going to win.
I mean, I'd like to see San Francisco win.
He was just
so fucking arrogant and fucking obnoxious to the referees, the coach for the Eagles.
Like, he was yelling at them.
He was yelling for him.
He had a hot mic.
He got
the mandoor like.
He was so condescending.
He was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
And he didn't realize that he was going to get picked up by the television.
That happens quite a bit.
He was yelling at the the ref, though.
The poor ref was just like, I'm allowed down here.
It's like, it was so arrogant.
That's why I hope the Eagles lose, though, just because of that jerk.
I'm not a big Eagle fan.
I mean, there's always been that rival between Giants and the Eagles for the longest time, but I mean, they didn't even show up to play.
I thought at least.
Did you watch your Giants get your third?
I turned them off at.
Oh, you didn't even watch the whole game?
No, I turned them off.
I don't want to throw up.
Just tired.
I got another team to watch.
I got the devils to watch now, baby.
The devil's doing well.
The devil's doing playing awesome right now.
Yeah.
I wish I could watch it.
Still no devil blackout.
I don't know if he's counting.
I'm not gonna get my MSG Go.
My MSG Go pay.
I tried that.
I don't want to get my brother-in-law who also got me in trouble.
Oh, so I got in trouble years ago.
He doesn't work for the cable company, I'm sure, anymore.
No, he does not.
Oh, okay.
As long as he doesn't work for the cable company.
But he gave me his MSG Go thing, and it just doesn't work.
Really?
Well, I want to watch it
on my TV.
You can't watch it on your TV.
Yeah,
I can't watch it on my phone.
I can't watch sporting events.
Actually, you can't watch it.
It's like watching it on a postage stamp.
You can cast it onto my TV.
Watch it on your iPad.
Yeah.
It's still not the same.
I'm older now.
My peeps.
Now you're looking at an 85-inch screen is just like cutting it.
Yeah, it's like a 13-inch.
Yeah, it's like I can't see.
I could use a magnifying glass in front of the 85-inch.
It does seem like every day there's more Tom Brady news.
Actually, if I'm in contradiction to what Giddam said last week about Tom going to the Jets
was Tom Brady being questioned like, hey, where do you think you're going?
He's like, I don't know where the fuck I'm going.
He was all fucking unruly.
What's going on?
I was acting like a jerk, I thought.
But yeah, but
Giddam has an insider at the Jets.
And that insider told Gidham personally that Tom Brady is going to be a Jet.
You don't believe it?
No.
Why in the world would he go to the Jets?
They're a team on the rise.
They have the offensive.
He's got how many years to play.
It's just like if they're not.
Well, their window is going to close.
The defense is good now.
The offense would be good with a good quarterback.
Let's see.
Favre,
we've been down this road.
Well, you don't have to worry about Tom Brady sending any dick picks like Favre did that fucked up this whole tenure in the Jets.
Right?
So you don't have to worry about it.
I'm pretty sure Brady.
He's got a son kissing, like, you know, Bob Kraft kissing and stuff like that.
You got to worry about those things.
Kissing his son on the left.
So
you're gonna equate a loving father giving his son a kiss to a fucking pig sending his unsolicited cock
to a reporter who doesn't want it.
Has your father ever kissed you on the lips?
No, but he has sent me dick pics.
Okay.
See?
There's nothing wrong with that.
They were solicited, to be fair to him.
You know what?
He could be on the Jets.
I don't think he plays for the Jets, though.
My.
I would think he would go to a team that's just
there.
The Jets are just there.
Their defense is good.
They got all the penalty.
And they fell apart to play real quick.
Because they don't have a quarterback.
You think if they don't sign Daniel, it's going to be a good one.
If they don't sign Daniel Jones, you think they give him a crack?
No.
Aaron Rodgers, they say, is coming to the Jets, too.
That's the big rumor.
Rodgers or Brady?
Either one.
I don't know.
I think Brady would be awesome as a Jet.
Playing Belichick twice, playing the Bills twice.
It would be like,
what a division.
Miami twice.
It would be just a
four.
Jets playing the Patriots.
That's a nice little rivalry there, right?
I don't know.
Maybe he hangs it up too.
Has there been talks that he might just, I mean,
he is at that, I mean, like the last two seasons, he's not been terrible in that Dallas game.
Yeah, but I'm saying he got, you know, and Dallas didn't look that great either, though.
I don't know if you watched that Dallas game.
I did watch that Dallas.
I think he was throwing like Felix Hunger.
But I'm saying he's at a, you know.
Do you ever remember Felix when he took took the, when he received the set tracks with shooting the baskets?
In the house.
Again, I mean, every year that goes by, man, you're just, you know, you're a year older.
You're just, you're not, you know, a lot of stuff happened to him this year, too.
A lot of stuff.
So, you know, it's just played on a team that wasn't, I thought he was, he was better last year.
But now you're actually like, now you get to the point where it's like you're hurting, you know, even though you can't break, like all the records are broken basically by him.
It's just that,
do you really want to go out just like being like, this is my known season now?
You know, it's just like, I don't, like, I struggle.
Why?
I agree.
Why?
You don't want to see him struggle.
It's like, you know, Willie Mays out in the air.
Look, he's a great quarterback.
I just thought after he took that other team to the Super Bowl at the first year, one at home, you know, whatever.
It's like, look, I don't have to do anything else.
I don't, you know, look, I love the game of football.
It's time to hang up my cleats.
You know, how many, you know, it's like, I got plenty of rings.
You know, I took another team in the first year that I came here.
That's like, could you just walk away from your job, though, knowing that you're the best there is at that point at your workplace?
If I had his money, I'd fucking do it.
I wouldn't even go in again.
You wouldn't have to ask me twice.
But they're like, come on, man, you're the best.
That's all right.
I could be the best from fucking home.
I mean, just to do like an
analysis.
He had that all set up, too, though.
I don't think he'll be a good analysis.
He has no sense of humor.
He's very robotic.
There's a reason that not many guys can have the
regiment that he is.
But he has a sense of humor, though.
But
the very fact that he could win a Super Bowl and then be training
two days later says that he is not built like other dudes.
So he's not going to be a good analysis, I don't think, because he's too.
Not an announcer, but I mean...
I don't know what the word is I'm looking for, but it's...
He just doesn't have...
He doesn't.
He's too regimented.
Yeah, there you go.
But I'm saying, Phil Sims, I don't follow.
What was that word I was trying to pronounce earlier this episode?
Ex-licker?
Oh, yeah.
Elixir?
He's an ex-licker.
But I'm saying, like, Phil Sims, I never, you know, he's not like that.
But I'm saying I could see him in that kind of role sitting around, you know, with them as far as an analysis.
They're paying him so much money that they're going to have him doing everything, I bet.
As far as like a commentator, I can't see him like
next to, like, could you imagine him against
what's the guy that does
the guy that was on the Bengals, Chris Collinsworth.
Could you imagine him next to the Brady?
Well, they're both color men, though.
They're not play-by-play guys.
That's what Brady's job would be Collins.
You'd have two color men in a booth that's never met.
I can see Gronkowski.
He's a color man, too, though.
You have to play-by-play guy, like a Nance
or Buck.
Yeah.
Bryce Zoning.
I guess Bryce zoning out.
He has no idea what's going on.
And there's 90% of the audience who's like, what the fuck did I tune into?
All these names.
You're right.
You're guts.
You know who's living her best life, though, right now?
Giselle.
Look at these pictures.
She's out there modeling.
Karate instructor?
I don't realize she's worth so much more than he is.
That big boob hanging out.
Yeah, that is.
Sweet.
I mean,
well, you know what?
I guess
if you're going to blow up
the girl that's like woo-wooing them, you should at least then go do what you want to do then.
That's what she says.
Right.
If you're going to nuke it all then you might as well then go do at least go do what your heart wants you to do and if that's that ass did you see the girl that's that's chasing brady though no she looked good there's like there's that i mean i have to assume so well she's like a known known person um how the hell do you know about this that pops up on my feet because that's sports
this is what she said um With much gratitude for our time together, Tom and I have amicably finalized our divorce.
My priority has always been and will continue to be our children, whom I love with all my heart.
We will continue co-parenting to give them love, care, and attention they greatly deserve.
I've done my part,
which is to be there for Tom.
I focused on creating a cocoon and loving environment for my children to grow up and be there supporting him in his dreams.
I think she did.
You know, I'm not going to deny that she did, but.
Well, if she wants to go back to Molly, there's only a window of it.
But I'm saying there's only a certain way.
You know how many nannies they probably had anyway?
You want to raise your kids, though, too?
That's the idea.
Why you have kids?
You want to let nannies raise your kid for the whole time?
I think this last sentence is very telling.
I have a huge list of things that I have to do that I want to do.
At 42, I feel more connected with my purpose.
Okay.
She was not able to connect with her purpose and live her life as a fully actualized individual while being sort of in the shadow of the greatest football player of all time.
I mean, I'm sure.
She's like, I just couldn't be myself.
And
I was there for as long as I could do it.
At 42.
That feels like an out, though.
It feels like an excuse.
Whether she wants to connect with her purpose in life?
No, like, no, she couldn't do it while remaining married to him.
Oh, while remaining married to Tom?
Well, when they first got married,
did he win any Super Bowls yet?
Like, did she go through?
Do you think she married him with not a ring?
She's worth more than he is.
She could buy him twice.
That's how much more she's worth.
But
he still was Tom Brady, though.
She's not marrying the backup
she's marrying the start the starting quarterback she's the cheerleader she's the ultimate cheerleader he's the ultimate she's the one that served the divorce papers right so i mean because inevitably when you're married like
when you marry just solely the quarterback you're like i want to i want to date the quarterback you find out he's just like he's a he's a jock there's nothing else to him there's nothing else to brady but football he's a robot no
programmed to win yeah robots losing juice It's not programmed or it's more like self-destruct now.
It's time to power that bad boy down.
That's the old motto.
What's the like that?
What was it?
The T2000?
By the time he got to this, he's like, at the end of the movie, he's all fucked up and shit.
Half his skin's off his fucking body.
It's time for the new Santa D model.
Brady said, I'll be back.
Yeah, I'll be back
to win another ring Sunday.
So I can watch the red LED in his eye go out.
I can't wait to play this fucking audio for you when he holds another Super Bowl trophy over his head.
You know what?
It's going to be on fucking PlayStation 5, and he ain't going to do it again, trust me.
Whatever it is, PlayStation 6.
How many times do you have to do that?
I think the kids abbreviate it to PS.
Yeah, PS.
Fucking Cro-Mac.
PS is Play School.
Or preschool.
PS5, Preschool 5.
Sunday, I want you to take a look at this
photo, okay?
Tell me if you'll recognize this hunk of.
Oh, I know.
I know who that is.
That picture was in the register for so long.
Was it?
Because Marybeth came across it.
It's a picture of Walt back in his youth, probably like 18, right?
But it's not even like, it's not even like in frame, though.
It's like, it's like
those drinking years?
Whoever took the photo was.
Well, it's an unnamed lady took the photo.
Yeah, it wasn't really composed.
Paparazzi, huh?
It wasn't composed the best it could have been.
No, because I was like, don't take a picture.
Because I wasn't sure if I had underwears on.
I was fucking not sure if you're knocking those boots.
I was being my own Brady.
Now, did you take possession of the picture afterwards, or was this leaked?
Is this a leaked?
No, no, I took possession of that.
This is revenge porn, practically.
I took possession of that picture, and I put it in my drawer.
decades later it popped up and I when I saw it I was like it might be the only picture I have of me you know when you were young when I was that young.
And
I brought it to the stash
and to prove to Jeff because I don't think he really believed that I fucking, I was a headbanger.
He thought I was a poser and I had to fucking prove him wrong and put it in his face and have him apologize to me
that absolutely I was a fucking headbanger.
Yeah, imagine
your head for other reasons.
I go in your face.
I'm blown away.
I was schooled.
That fucking picture, man, is out of control.
Is there if I throw it up on Twitter for people to see?
Yeah, go ahead.
I mean, it's all over the internet anyway.
Oh, is it?
Yeah, I put it in one of the uploads.
Yeah, that's where I found it.
Yeah, it's on, it's in one of the.
Yeah, but who got the picture?
So, who got the picture?
But you should put the picture to Victor orgether.
Just to put it in there when I was referring to my old metal days.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, a lot of listeners have seen this.
If they're on Patreon, actually, don't put it on Twitter.
Make them go to Patreon.
Sorry, guys.
My hands are tied.
Actually, I want to take a second to thank the patrons.
We hit last week, we hit a record number, the most patrons we've ever had.
That's amazing.
That is something to be
to have to acknowledge and thank the listeners for that.
Yeah, I thought that was pretty cool.
I don't think it went up that much.
It just didn't drop down that much.
Well, that's good.
I mean, that's which is fine.
People are happy with
what you're saying and listening to your content.
If the world, Sunday, Jeff, was satisfied with status quo,
I believe this world would be a thousand times better than it is right now.
I feel like everybody has a choice but to be satisfied with the status quo.
No, I feel like.
Like, what are you going to do?
I think people are always looking for the next best,
bigger
thing.
They're never, like, a lot of people are just will never be satisfied.
This iPhone just came out.
A new one comes out six months later.
I got to get the new iPhone.
That's the mindset.
Yeah.
I just wish a lot of people could be satisfied with status quo.
Do you feel you are Sunday?
Somewhat, to an extent.
I mean, to an extent, I am.
I mean, you know, unless something really is like a necessity.
I mean, I've had this phone now for a while.
Had this droid?
Yes.
You've had that for at least since 2000, right?
No.
23 years.
A fucking flip phone.
You had that a long time.
You still got to crank that phone?
This phone's not that old.
It's about three years old.
So you've had droids before this then.
Yeah.
Okay, that's why, because I know you've had a droid for a long time.
Yeah, it's just Android's just a device.
It's just, you know,
it's just the operating software.
Right.
And you're happy with it.
I don't think you need to have.
I don't think you need to get it.
There's not that much that changes with the phone.
I mean, it's just like, I mean,
unless you're using it for, I mean, it's all about pictures for some.
I guess because everybody uses it for Twitter and Instagram, and it's all about.
How has the camera on that?
How many pixels you're getting?
I don't even know how many pixels it is.
It takes good fucking pictures.
That's all that matters.
And I'm not worried about the pictures.
I still use it as a phone.
Like it's supposed to be.
I don't even know how to call it a phone anymore.
It's not a phone.
It's a fucking mini computer.
Sunday, Jeff, I found this an interesting story.
Oh, wait, where did it end up?
God damn it.
It was going to take me a second.
I think I accidentally.
That's right.
Take it down.
That was your Christmas.
My Christmas?
Well, you know, I was under the weather.
I was actually recuperating from surgery during Christmas.
I had a catheter in.
I don't even know what I did.
Just thinking about that.
It was a word.
It makes me think.
Yeah, Yeah, because you just know what's what the outcome is.
Yeah.
You know, I just think of a straw.
Yeah, I don't want to
just beat it to death, you know,
but
it was
very uncomfortable.
You know, as uncomfortable as you think it is.
Do you put you to sleep for that?
Like, are you.
No.
They could put you.
I had a catheter put in wide awake, stone cold, sober.
Was it?
Like, you remember, you know, I could just see how he is.
Are most people drunk with it right now?
You just like, you know, like the unknown of never having that known before.
You know what I'm just saying?
Like, when they tell you what they're going to do,
like, holy shit.
It's like, well, we have to do this.
And just like, you know,
what do you do?
It's like, how it's like, like, if I can't do that.
This whole, I can close.
It changes like how you think about your member.
I used to love my member.
Now I hate it.
Oh, no.
Yeah, now I'm just like, you know, although this could be great for numbers if you went transgender holy kate flannigan
kate flannigan
no but now i'm kind of like you know i kind of like
it was you know it never gave me any problems and it all you know and i felt like it was always it always gave uh good results but i got two kids now yeah now i'm kind of like i you know i'm like wondering well like will it be the same when i'm ready to like get back on the horse you just got to reacquaint yourself yeah it's it's i mean that's a that's a long time you've gone
so far, and you got how much longer?
A couple months, yeah, at least till the end of March.
Yeah, it is really cool.
I was, um,
you know, I'm watching music videos, and even music videos now from the 80s will get me going, you know, where I'm like, I got to turn it off, go take a cold shower.
So you got to fucking get him spraying you with water?
And I got Michael Jackson video came on, and you better go take a shower.
Close enough.
Fucking now I know where Cooper got it from.
He was dancing bad, and I was just like, get him, turn that off.
Did we change a channel?
Oh, shit.
It should be easier to put the catheter in now.
No, no, that.
Oh,
I'm telling you, man.
But I think it doesn't go in like long, long.
Not as long as many people need to go in.
It comes out with this fucking 10-foot tube.
No, without...
I don't want to get graphic or to
repulse anybody, but it was like, you don't want to see it.
That's the key.
If anybody listening, if you're going to get it done or taken out, make sure you look at the ceiling.
Don't make a mistake and look at it while it's going to be a good thing.
It'll take all the joy out of the good things your dick would do that you partook in.
Because now I can't stop seeing that.
Really?
Yeah.
You got the person going.
Every fucking night I see this.
Wow, swords.
You got PTSD.
Yeah, penis.
Yeah, tremendous.
Testicles, central music.
Penis scared to death.
That's crazy.
Yeah,
it wasn't fun.
But you know what, though, Christmas was a little bit
more.
I don't want to say a little bit more
thankful.
Like, you know, I was like, you know what?
Because I wasn't sure if I was going to be here.
You know, I didn't know if I would make it through the operation.
And so it was a bit more,
it was a bit more about Jesus.
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah, this Christmas.
It was like the baby Jesus this Christmas.
I kind of had maybe like visions like Tiny Tim walking around with a little crutch and cock fucking all bandaged up.
He was walking around
the house.
God bless us, everyone.
And to all,
good night.
No, I, yeah, it's been
you talk to God a lot when
you're going through through something that you think may be
more extreme or more serious than you don't know.
He's gets like those fucking kidney stones, so you know that's that's got to be, yeah.
Well, you've gotten them too.
I mean, so you know, that's got to be fucking that's like pissing a shark tooth off.
They told me when I went to the divergence room, I said, if you had a kidney stone, you'd be in more pain than you're in now.
And I'm like,
I'm fucking not doing too good right now.
Like, you're telling me it's dare you diminish my pain.
Yeah.
So you got a headache.
Yeah, but I'm glad it's.
I'm closer to being through with it than
I was before.
I'm on the other side of the mountain.
Man, no fucking loving until March, huh?
No.
No.
I'm come close.
I almost
like I'm ready.
I think I'm okay.
Maybe I need the butter here.
Maybe I need to chase you off.
That spray bottle over here.
Start fucking spraying fucking wall when he comes into the fucking room.
Start grabbing your leg and shit.
Come in.
That's crazy.
Did you find your story?
I have two stories.
One is more of a precautionary tale, or a cautionary tale, sorry, for our 13 percenters.
Several women on TikTok are seriously regretting their tattoos of an upside-down pineapple after choosing the design without knowing its meaning.
And if you had done a quick Google search, it would inform you that the turned over fruit is commonly used as a symbol for swingers looking for a good time.
Why a pineapple, though?
But again, see, where does this, like, why a pineapple?
Where does this come from?
It's a pineapple inside of a triangle.
Yeah, it's probably the sexiest fruit out there.
What are you talking about?
Peach.
Built like a pineapple.
Peach.
It says somebody asked her.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Somebody asked her on
the platform if it was an upside-down down pineapple, and she said, not when my arm is down.
But then she did her own Google search, and then she realized that she had made a huge mistake.
I don't buy that anybody just walks into a tattoo parlor.
Here it is.
That's because
this is the fucking face of somebody who would do something that fucking dumb.
But
how are you
going to walk in and be like, you know what?
I'm just going to, I saw online some other person with an upside-down pineapple.
I'm going to get one.
Are people that
in need of inspiration for a tattoo that they're just like
it means nothing to them?
They just see it and they don't
like that.
I can't underestimate
the power of the draw of the trend of ignorance.
They want to be part of something so desperately.
And like, this is not a young person.
This is not like a fucking 18-year-old girl that we're looking at.
This woman looks to be in her late 20s to early 30s, much too old to be like, duh, that looks fun.
Everybody on TikTok's doing it.
I'll do it too.
So status quo.
Is this like a tribal tattoo when everybody was getting tribal tattoos?
Right.
I was the asshole back in the 90s going, I know what everybody's doing.
I'll get one too.
Tramp stamps.
I want a pineapple one next.
Upside down, sir, please.
Put it in a triangle, why don't you?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so.
Oh, no.
They all pick a swing.
She impulsively
got it on a Hawaiian vacation.
What's up?
And you think listeners, some people listening right now,
I don't know every listener.
The ones I've met don't seem to be simple enough to do something like this, but you never know.
If you save one person from being mistaken for a swinger,
no ink.
No ink for you, right, Sonny?
No ink yet.
I mean, I think it's cool.
It would have to be like, I'm not going to get a fucking upside-down pineapple.
No.
You know, but you know, it'd be just like,
you know, something that's going to be be cool.
Why not?
Why are you such a prude?
Why don't you get an upside-down pineapple?
Why would I add all the tattoos?
Huge.
Like on your chest.
Fucking like nice fucking Conan battle axe Rosetta fucking tattoo.
Yeah, over a fucking
pineapple?
Yeah, I mean something cool, something that reflects yourself.
So you want to look like the equivalent of a 70s van.
Yeah.
A little grim, posty grim reaper down the side.
You know, something's kind of like,
I don't want to say cliched, it's not really cliched, but it's, it's not something that people are going to be like,
oh man, I love that.
Or like,
I've seen that a million times.
You brought that up, or you're relating to Death Dealer then.
You're saying
that, like, look, if I, if I had because you like art, if I wanted to have, like, like people that had sleeves and everything, I said I'd get like all every fucking every cartoon character that was done all merged together.
I'm so glad you never did that.
Yeah, it would look bad.
It looked so terrible.
It It looked like the Partridge Family Bus.
Yeah.
Who's though?
It's like, there's Homer, there's Bugs.
Probably a person with the most tattoos that I know personally would be Jimmy the hair guy, right?
Oh, he's got a lot of hair.
He is fucking full of them.
He's got a decent amount of tattoos.
But his aren't like, they do seem random.
There doesn't seem to be any overall theme.
He has a love for every, like, for the character or the franchise.
Yeah, but I don't think they look bad.
Like, I don't know.
I don't think they're bad.
There's some guys that can pull off.
the very fact that Sunday is like has the body of an of a newborn baby like is like right it's not like the physique but I mean like
it says pure but so we can't see
I can't picture my smooth ass bro yeah I can't picture you all tatted up though it's so far my brother is my brother tons of fucking tattoos he looks like he just got out of jail yeah yeah
but he dresses like it too with all the jeans and everything but I'm saying he's got like a big huge he's got a lot of Japanese art but he looks like a badass but like I don't know if like Homer and Bullwinkle and fucking Woody Woodpecker wouldn't look good in prison, huh?
Like a shirt I wouldn't want to say.
If somebody got into a fight and he peels his shirt off, people would be like, oh my God.
You like fucking Danny Trazer.
Want a piece of me?
Fucking cell block H.
He's like, that guy's got cartoons on his fucking shirt.
Is that Woody?
Yeah, next thing I know, you fucking see the guy like Leatherface wearing it over his fucking face.
Oh, then you can freak people out.
You do your droopy.
Yeah, just like do your droopy.
Bro,
you want a piece of
your meat.
Come on, motherfucker.
How do you think that pans out?
I guess it really depends on the person that's about to beat his ass.
Because there is the guy that's like, he's all right.
This dude's fucking funny.
Oh, yeah, there's three responses.
He's all right.
He's a funny motherfucker.
I like this fucking card.
Bend over.
Two,
okay, this guy's really out there.
I'm not sure what to make of this guy.
He's a wild card.
This is sketchy.
I'm not sure if I should be able to do that.
So I want to beat up a mental patient.
And three,
they just look at him for half a second and pummel the shit out of him.
Right.
They're like, he's disrespecting us.
There's only three responses.
Yeah, you really have to be.
For the first one, you really have to hope that they're familiar with the drink.
We wouldn't pull it off, though, huh?
What was the phrase he used to do that was crazy with Droopy?
It was like a...
How many, it was about sucking dick or something like that?
Oh, no, that was the thing.
That was the Droopy phrase.
That was from Bad Lieutenant.
Oh, it was like, show me how you suck a guy's cat.
Oh, the girls in the car yeah
show me how you suck a guy's cat
you shouldn't you would i don't say that if you ever get in prison i wouldn't say that in prison anyways
yeah leave it the last fucking place you want to say that leave it out of your repertoire
what was your other article uh the other article sunday have you ever have you ever been in a situation where you were so embarrassed you know to uh red-faced you to get somebody else what the fuck where did this article go now?
It keeps disappearing for some reason.
Easy with red face.
Hold on, maybe.
Embarrassed.
You know, you're blushing.
When's the last time you blushed?
Embarrassed.
Do you blush easily?
No.
No.
I'm just trying to think of what position I would have been in.
I mean, it's probably going back to like high school and stuff when, you know, like you got on stage.
Tell me the last time you blushed was in high school.
Yeah, I mean, what else for, motherfucker?
Why would I fucking blush?
I mean, somebody flirted with you or something, maybe, you know?
Well, I've been with, you know,
I know, but like, or like, or maybe, wow.
What am I like, fucking, like, oh, shucks.
I'm like, geez, my fucking ears are glowing like I'm fucking bashful from the fucking Snow White and Seven Dwarves.
It's just like, you know, you're, you know, you're a fucking adult now.
You don't fucking do that shit at all.
What the fuck?
I told you, man.
He is fucking.
To be like,
oh, come on.
Remember that buzzard in the body?
Oh, fucking beaky buzzard?
I'm wondering how you would handle this.
Surgeons extract condom-wrapped banana man ate in hormonal rage fit.
Extract it from his stomach?
He ate it?
He had to be hospitalized after eating a banana wrapped in a condom in a fit of rage, which resulted in a serious bowel blockage.
So he didn't shove it up his ass,
but he did put it in a rubber for some reason.
He just swallowed it?
It doesn't look, I mean, there's the picture of it.
It looks like it's like banana puree.
It's all mashed up.
Oh, so it wasn't like he just put the condom over a fucking raw banana and fucking broke it.
And then swallowed it whole, yeah.
But I mean,
that is a very large thing to ingest, no?
Well, if you swallow it whole,
like swords, you know, those sword swallowers?
A banana is nothing to a sword swallower, right?
Yeah, but I think they're trained to do that.
It's not like well, if you get fucking riled up and you get pissed off, of course,
what else are you supposed to do?
Except jam a banana in a rubber and eat it.
Fucking consumer torture.
It's just one of those days.
Just don't cough.
Look.
The bizarre case came to light after the unidentified patient had to be reported to the hospital after experiencing abdominal pain, nausea, and vomiting.
He wasn't able to tolerate any food or drink and hadn't had a bowel movement in over 24 hours.
My question would be why?
He had a report, reportedly had a history of depression and copped swallowing the prophylactic covered fruit in a fit of hormonal rage.
It seems that that's what he's saying.
That's that he's
your man of the world.
But I'm saying
pissed off.
But I'm saying why you're an angry young man.
So you don't see me putting it in the middle of the world.
Let me see how young he was.
Right, but that's how other people deal with he was 34.
He's 34.
No, everybody's going to not everybody's going
approach their anger in the same way you would.
Some people put condoms on fruit and then eat it.
It's called stupidity.
It's not anger.
Can you imagine the going to the ER?
I've been at the ER
a couple times
in the last couple months.
No banana, though, huh?
Yeah.
And it's embarrassing to even be like, you know what?
I can't go to the bathroom.
Then to have to, like, then on top of that, say, also, I ate a banana in a fit of hormonal.
I got so mad.
Or I didn't even tell him and just let him do the x-ray.
Hold on.
And I didn't tell you this before, but it had a rubber on it.
I also didn't tell you this.
We were at a party.
It got out of hand.
Or they just look at the banana.
When they finally retrieve it, it has the rubber on it.
And then you just deny.
You're just like, well, I don't know.
I don't know how to do it.
What do you say to a doctor?
What do you say to somebody that's pulling that out of you and be like,
I was pissed off.
It's like, you know, I don't have, you know,
you're going to be just like, why?
I mean, you want to get it.
Some people punch walls.
Some people walk in the walls.
Yeah, but that's a frame event worse than punching wine.
Some people, you know.
So far, you're just naming shit I do.
Right, but I'm saying that's a lot more common to be like, you know, that's a healthy.
Could you imagine I come in and I'm like, yeah, I was been in the hospital for two days.
I got so mad I ate a rubber filled with bananas.
I was fucking pissed off.
You know, he's not going to say like, you know, Mary Beth, give me that fucking damn condom and my fucking banana.
Yeah.
Pissed off.
I'm angry again.
I'm angry again.
What do you mean you didn't buy any bananas?
Because you won't stop doing this.
You didn't put the condom on the banana.
The condom's not for me.
We're older guys.
This is my last thing that I have.
Walt.
Okay.
We're older guys.
So start worrying at thinking about bucket lists and shit, right, Sunday, Jeff?
Like, what do you want to do?
You're like, I want to go to Japan and Australia.
Yeah, I want to go to, there's a lot of countries I want to say.
Australia is one of them.
Japan, Greece.
You want to go together?
Shit, man.
Both side of Trex.
To Australia?
We'll go on the Outback.
Australia.
It's going to be a very long time for you to get to Australia.
You're going to be allergic to the air once you get to Australia.
How many poisonous things are in that fucking country?
He gets off.
He starts itching.
It's going to take him fucking six.
It's going to be in a boat for fucking like 12 weeks.
I don't know.
Maybe this new
health scare maybe will shock me and
get on a plane and go see where fucking crocodile Dundee was filmed.
The first time he gets look, I didn't want this to happen to you at all, but why couldn't this have happened before comic book men?
So then you're like, okay, I'll get on a plane.
Fast enough.
Oh, man, that's a lot better flying to LA than it is just
taking a corner.
Or go see all the sets where the Road Warrior was filmed, Crocodile Dundee,
Desert Middle East.
Go see where Silver Chair played.
We'll do any of the things you want to do.
We won't actually do anything.
We'll just go see things that were done at one time, Koala.
My interest.
You just come back.
You can box a kangaroo for my enjoyment.
Yeah, it looks like
boxing semester the cat.
These are some of the things.
There's a lady who worked at a hospice, and when she asked, I'm like, you know, looking back,
what do you wish?
Blah, blah, blah.
She said, most people at the end of their lives have regrets about not appreciating their health.
Ooh, I agree with that.
Not appreciating being alive, the little things,
working their life away and not spending more time with family
so basically she's saying be in the moment live presently be grateful don't get taken don't take your for granted your health and little things about living life that's easy to read here and easy to forget in a couple minutes when somebody pisses you
rubber with a banana i agree with that health over wealth yeah yeah all that money didn't help steve jobs all that money doesn't help you know any of these you know your time's up your time's up.
I read an article.
The guy's name was actually Brian Johnson, spelled the same way as mine, which was quite a treat, Sunday John.
106.
And he's this like
tech millionaire.
Oh, I read this, and he's like spent like $6 million of reverse aging.
He spends millions of dollars a year for all this.
Like, he's a vegan, and he does.
He looks weird, doesn't he?
Yeah, he
looks like Androgynous almost.
There's a price to pay.
There's something that it's not going to look 100% normal.
Right, and it doesn't.
To fuck with Father Time and
the laws of nature.
But it's a lot of its genetics, though, too.
I mean, you come from good genetics.
Look at Keanu Reeves.
That motherfucker doesn't age.
Look at Linda Hamilton.
Looks like a washrag.
And they both fucking hit Hollywood at the same time.
I think she's probably older than he is, though, isn't it?
I don't think so.
Well, look, again, some people age
look stad of the fucking sun.
You know, that's one of the things.
Yeah.
You know, that's one of the things.
The sun's not good to be in the sun all the time.
A little bit's good, but you don't want to be out in the sun.
Destroys your skin.
Yeah.
I don't do any kind of
like sunbathing.
You want a nice, not say to go out for a nice walk or whatever, down the boardwalk beach or whatever.
Put some sunblock on.
Yeah, put some sunblock on and just, you know, know when to come inside.
It's valuable information.
And the other reason, I remember
it hasn't been disseminated before anywhere else.
I remember when I was a kid, it was the worst sunburn.
This is like before, really, I think, you know, when people were putting like what a Hawaiian, like they actually wanted to get tan.
Like, they put fucking cooking oil, basically, Hawaiian tropic all over them.
But I had such bad sunburn when I was in Florida.
It was the first time I was ever in Florida.
And just like as a kid, you take your shirt off, whatever, you're swimming or
swimming around.
I mean, I'm sure they probably had some kind of sunblock back in the 70s, maybe.
I'm sure, maybe.
Maybe I'm sure they did something.
But, you know, it's just maybe it's not as powerful as it is today.
But when I tell you, you could actually feel the fucking heat off my shoulder.
And I was not in pain until like fucking later on that day.
I could not fucking sleep on my back.
It was the most, I thought I was a burn victim.
That's how fucking bad it was.
And it was just like.
It was just like, they took my shirt off, and it was just like.
Did you know if the sun was one mile closer to the earth, we'd all be cinders?
It's just one mile,
one mile closer to the earth, and it's all over.
Isn't that fucked up how God planned that shit?
93 million miles,
not a fucking mile closer.
Thank God people tuned out during the Sunday Jeff Worth Sunburn story, so they're not hearing this fucking weird religious rant that's going on now.
I don't want to talk about this fucking wacky fucking tech entrepreneur.
That's what he looks like.
He's a strange-looking guy, isn't he?
Looks like fucking Patrick Ebliosh.
Bringing it back to sports.
He does have a strange look about him.
Yeah, just like a weird, like his.
His skin's weird looking.
Oh, there he is.
It's smooth.
Yeah, he's like shiny.
Yeah, it's like his skin is shiny and waxy.
But if you told me he's 45, I totally believe it.
Yeah, he looks like 45.
It's not like he's staving off fucking energy.
He's on a quest to turn his back on the biological clock, returning his body's 45-year-old brain, heart, lungs, liver, kidneys, tendons, teeth, skin, hair, bladder,
penis, and rectum to their
18-year-old condition.
No, he's going to return them to their somehow.
He'll do whatever it takes or costs to get them.
Don't do it, bro.
Don't fuck around with fucking the laws of nature.
But he costs $2 million a year towards anti-aging.
For what, though?
I mean, what could you actually be doing?
I mean,
you're probably going to prolong your life if he's.
He's probably probably got like oxygen treatments and all kinds of supplements and fucking skin peeling
that stuff from food though too.
I mean you can get certain
all you he's doing like he's going like he's spending millions to do this.
Most people don't.
Don't matter.
Whatever's going to get you is going to get you.
Yeah, most people have enough money to get ripped off by some cream that's going to fucking
reduce wrinkles.
Yeah.
I mean, it's just going to be just like, what's his family genetics like?
Is there any history of illnesses in his family?
That stuff you can't erase.
it's part of your code
you know so you just hope that you come from good genes and you hope that nothing you know it skips a generation hopefully doesn't ever hit your kids or whatever and you know
he has taken 33 537 pictures in total of his bowels
the undertaking of a fairly constant stream of blood stool and urine tests as well as whole body mri's and ultrasounds extensive daily and weekly skincare routines that involve a lot of lasers and chemical peels and he even even employs a device that tracks his nighttime erections just to give a sense of how deep this rabbit hole goes.
With that many pictures of crap, he should have been fucking sending that shit into the not-so-Super Bowl.
He could have won.
He could have won.
There's a good chance he could have won.
Yeah.
He's too worried about this bullshit.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
That's the obsessive.
Yeah, well, I mean, if there's one thing to be obsessive about, but you're not even living your life when you're having your fucking asshole cleaned and this and that and fucking
goes, oxygen bars, living in hyperbaric chambers for fucking six hours.
What kind of life is that?
Got to live, son?
Get out there and have a fucking piece of pizza.
Now, I got a segment that I wanted to do with Sunday, but I'm a little worried that it may not play as well as I thought it might because he might not be familiar with some of the subjects that I was going to ask him about.
Right, because you say he lives in a fucking vacuum.
Yeah, he lives in a black vacuum.
Let's talk about Hitler.
Right.
But i want to play this thing would you rather
you could definitively or
you get to choose
you or brai
what is revealed to the world
some of the some of the secrets that are that are going around now some of the more you know
some of the things that people ponder and they they want the truth about you can reveal the truth to the world.
You have two choices.
But you have to say to yourself,
is the world better if I reveal A versus B?
So you're like, you got to wait.
Which one are you going to reveal to the world
the truth about?
Okay.
All right.
So have you heard of Jeffrey Epstein?
Yes.
So you know what he did, what he was accused of, and his island and shit, right?
Yes.
Okay.
Would you rather know definitively and reveal to the world how Epstein died
or reveal the itinerary of every person who ever visited his island down to the most repulsive details.
So the world is going to be
know it.
It's like it's going to be on every newspaper, internet,
newscast.
Which of those two things do you think, like you have this position of like, what's better for the world?
Oh, well, I think what's better would be how he died.
You wouldn't have wanted all that other stuff out there.
Why?
Because it's just.
You're protecting the fucking.
No, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no.
Privileged?
No, no, no.
It's just that I don't think you need to go with that much detail and everything else out there.
The public doesn't need to know like exactly, you know, you know what he did.
It's just that you don't have to, do you have to be that graphic like a catheter?
You know,
you have to be that graphic.
But you know who they're, like, that the media is being accused of protecting political.
I get it, but I'm sorry.
I think the American public.
Because they visited the island and they did some naughty shit.
I think they have illegal.
Yeah, but I think the American people know what went on.
I mean, I think they really know what went on.
They don't know what went on.
They don't know what I'm doing because there's never been any confirmation.
But I'm saying, you know, when you're saying like explicit detail down to whatever, I mean, it's just
different if it's just like, okay, we found they did A, B, C, D, and E.
That's one thing.
But you got to be like, well, if he's doing this or he's doing this, and going down to, you know, if it's just like, we know for a fact, this is what he did to this person, this is what he did to this person, this is what he did to this person, okay.
But not to the, like, into like intramural, you know, like if you're going in down to like
dig digging.
You don't want the gory details?
Yeah, like too deep.
You know what I'm saying?
Why?
Let's fucking pull the fucking curtain back and expose these monsters.
Well, here's the thing.
If you charge me,
I'm saying you're not.
We don't know.
I don't want them charged.
I want every piece of shit that visited that island who committed a crime to be fucking locked up.
Well, here's the thing.
Like,
if you're like, okay, I want to find out if Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide or if it was
an inside job.
If he committed suicide, then we're like, okay,
that's not satisfying.
And if they're like,
but if they're like, well, it was an inside job, some of the guards strung him up and killed him.
You would be like, well, obviously there's something to hide.
So I want to know what it is.
So the only answer is to fucking expose everybody and get the docket of like everybody.
I mean, you hear some of the names that visit the island?
Tom Hanks.
Oh, I read it.
Tom.
like I saw a screen cap of all the names that I'm like, you can't really believe everything you read on the internet, but I'm like, this is a lot of names.
This is definitive.
Bill Gates, right?
Bill Gates.
You guys are going to expose these scumbags.
You could take down Bill Gates.
You're going to expose it.
You're going to get credit, but the whole world is going to know.
Oh, I get credit?
Yeah, you're going to get credit.
Oh, okay.
But you might
be careful, though, because people love Tom Hanks.
So if you take him down, people love me more if I put him away.
I don't know about that.
Yeah, I don't know.
People are weird.
I'm going to jail.
So you're going to go with
just like you, Jenny.
Do you think the world
is not knowing how he died, but not knowing details?
I mean, like you said, when you start to throw in the names and stuff, yeah, then, yeah, I would want to know if that stuff is true.
So which one are you going with?
I would go with The Expose now that you said that.
That's the list of people who are in the world.
I mean, you're saying Bill Clinton, a former president, stuff like that i want to know that well you think that's the right choice oh it's the only choice yeah all right i got another one for sunday
you can find out and reveal to the world either who murdered john benet ramsey i don't know if you know who that is
don't know right oh my god
it was like one of the biggest cases of the century so i don't know if you know who this person is and either then uh or we can find out who was behind the jfk conspiracy do you know what that is jfk yeah yeah Yeah, I know what JFK is.
Lee Harvey Oswald died.
That I do.
I believe they taught that in history.
That is, I'm shocked you don't know who John Van A.
Ramsey is.
John Vane Ramsey was a little girl in 1996 who was murdered in Boulder, and they haven't been able to find her.
She was six years old.
She was murdered on Christmas morning or something.
Her parents have been suspects for all these many years.
One of them died, right, didn't the mom died?
The mother died, and
the father has been living with this, you know, for decades.
The brothers are suspects.
Yeah,
Now you could reveal to the world.
But take in consideration, will the world be a better place
knowing the JFK truth?
Or will it just tear us apart even more than we are now?
Or would you reveal the murder of this innocent little girl that's been a mystery for all these decades?
The JFK one almost feels like
it's so long.
And then they recently say the CIA did it.
We don't know definitively, but Sunday is
going to reveal all the
details.
It's definitive.
Yeah, probably the little girl, the other one.
It's just want to change the history books.
Let it stay the way it is.
It's too much to swallow, the JFK getting the truth on Apple.
You know, there's funny shit going on.
It's the government.
There's always funny shit going on with the government.
But I would like.
Be careful, Sunday, what you say.
People are big brothers, listen.
But if that father is innocent.
Do you not hear me again?
Tell me the fucking truth.
But if that father's innocent, though, I agree with you, Sunday.
I would want the John Bonet Ramsey truth to come out over JFK because if that father, I can identify more with that father.
Yeah, again, but I'm saying the JFK, what would it really change after all these?
Everybody that was involved with it is dead.
What could you do about it now?
I think it would, I mean, it's good to know
they don't trust the government already.
I think it would make them really distressful.
Yeah.
And
you got to weigh that against, is that good for
the capital or less?
Listen, though, if Brian Johnson's putting in position,
you're in charge of the Truth Commission now.
Right.
That's what we'll name this.
This segment is called Truth Commission.
Truth, like 911.
Because it's Truth Commission.
But let's say you're in charge.
You're put in charge of this commission.
You got to weigh all the implications of revealing these truths.
JFK Truth?
Who can you even put on trial now at this point?
Yeah, not many, not many people.
I don't think anybody's still around.
No, that's what I'm saying.
So, but like, it's a bigger story, though, than this one little girl.
A much bigger story.
I would think, like, no, it's just as big.
Everybody knows about it.
But then I look at Sunday,
but I'm like, oh, yeah, that's right.
You know,
it's too late, though.
I mean, it was two years after Kennedy's assassination, different story.
Right.
Yeah, I think I would rather see justice so long
after that little girl.
But if that, like I said,
if that father is innocent, at least give him
that before he leaves this earth.
Right.
But if he's not innocent, let's get him before he fucking leaves this earth.
Right, yeah.
Or it's also bad if it's like, oh, it turned out it was Patsy.
Because then they would have had like that.
And he didn't know.
But he didn't know the whole time.
Right.
Yeah.
Like, Sunday's going to reveal if he even had any hand in it, the father, if he was completely innocent.
I do like to imagine the circumstances in which Sunday is getting this information
at a trusted source.
Oh, okay.
All right, Sunday, you ready?
Definitive proof either way on the moon landing or definitive proof on the origins of COVID-19.
This is tough.
Well,
both, when revealed, are probably going to give you a serious
fake.
A lot of people died from COVID-19, though, so I would definitely go for the COVID-19.
Because you can understand faking the moon landing.
Yeah, because you're tired of doing stuff with the Russians and beat them in the space race and everything else and just be like, look, they put a man on the moon.
But COVID-19, you would be like, why the fuck did you do it?
Well, I'm saying if you had relatives that passed away from it.
No, I'm like,
I'm part of your cabinet and the truth commission.
I'm going to go to you and go like, Sunday, Sunday, before you rubber stamp this, that we're going to reveal COVID-19 origins.
What will the general public feel
when you reveal it and there's absolutely nothing that this country can do
to the people who
there's nothing the government can do to go after
whatever it is?
Maybe it is a penguin, maybe it is a lab.
We don't know, but let's say it is a lab, though.
There's nothing
this country can do about it.
And that is a fucking empty feeling for all those people whose family has passed away, whose businesses died.
Yeah.
Well, didn't you kind of feel that way when that journalist was murdered over in the embassy?
Remember that?
And like America sort of was just like, okay.
I mean, if that's what you guys think.
Like, like there was proof that they fucking did it.
We need oil, bitch.
Yeah.
We can't go after them.
We can't hold the oil.
Prices are high enough as it is.
So, Sunday, do you reveal it to the American public that the origins of COVID, knowing that a lot of people are going to be disenchanted when there's no fucking feet held to the fire after you reveal it?
Or you could do the moon one, and if we did get there, fucking national pride is back, baby.
We're going there.
Apparently, we're equally as excited.
Apparently, we're going there.
We're raiding down fucking Heroes Canyon 50, 60 years later, because it's definitively we were there.
The flag is up there.
They exhume the corpses of the astronauts, put them on a float.
Okay, now I've
again.
That's my role on your cabinet.
Now, have I swayed you or are you still going to stick with COVID-19?
I'm going to still stick with COVID-19.
I think that's a fucking bad move,
Commissioner.
Sure, no.
Why can't the people know the truth?
Because there's going to be nothing because they're going to demand fucking an eye for an eye, a tooth for an eye.
Well, you're going to be a fan of the cycle
justice.
That it definitely came from China, I guess, is what you're saying.
Maybe it didn't come from China.
Like I said, maybe
do you really think it came from a pangolin?
No, I think it came from China for sure.
Right, but I've a...
Or what if you found out that the government was involved with that?
Our government?
Yeah, what if you found out the United States government was involved in that?
Okay, yeah, all right.
Let's say that's in there.
I don't want to know nothing.
Right, you know what?
I quit.
Yeah.
We never landed on the moon.
It's a fucking Toyota.
Take this job and shove it.
That was the MTV guy on the moon.
Truth Commission, indeed.
So you can go with the moon then?
Oh, I would go with the moon then if they found out that the United States had some kind of involvement with it.
Yeah, that would be it.
You wouldn't have to go to Australia to see Mad Max anymore.
Can you imagine here?
Can you imagine if some of our greatest heroes felt that way?
Like, oh, wait, personally, I'm going to suffer this?
No, no, I think he's right, though.
But, like, it's just too dicey.
The
country can't handle that.
You got to
look out for the betterment of everybody.
But I'm saying, and that was for what?
Just some guy just telling you to go there without even real evidence, real proof.
But so what do you think about the moon lane?
Do you think you would, if you reveal the truth, do you believe that everything would be kosher or do you believe that there would be some shh
shim sham going on?
A little fucking Stanley Kubrick action.
I don't know.
A little Capricorn one.
Yeah, that Capricorn.
Yeah, I don't know.
It's just.
I mean, honestly, we landed on the moon.
You think you do?
I believe that one.
Okay.
So then you would feel comfortable picking the moon one then.
Yeah.
Brie, you agree with him?
I don't.
You'd want the.
I'd want the COVID-19 because, again,
like you understand why they did it for the moon.
But for something like COVID-19, it's like if they're, if they're capable of being in cahoots with the Chinese to fucking bring a virus onto the entire world.
That's his scenario.
No, just think about it.
Even if it's just used as a viral weapon.
If they did this, then they're capable of doing a lot more.
Well, it may have been an and I think the
blinders that a lot of people have on, like people are not.
People, how fast it's
that can actually say today, like, no, Biden's doing a great job.
It's just like, fucking, come on.
Like, you don't have to fucking like Trump to dislike Biden.
Like, give me a fucking break.
But there are still those people that are like, no, man, check it out.
Eggs are fucking $14.
I don't think the state of the country can handle.
Maybe we need a revolution, man.
The status quo isn't working.
You've got to protect.
Sorry, sorry.
Need the new boss.
Same as the old boss.
That's right.
That's what you're going to get here.
Tell them, Steve Jesus.
Yeah, three old white guys talking about shit that doesn't matter.
All right, sorry.
We'll go a little bit lighter one here for our final question to the Truth Commission, the Commissioner, the Commission.
What's up, Commission?
The Kinish?
You're the Commission.
Oh, I thought you said Kanish.
Tate of Kanish.
Definitive truth revealed on what was on the New England Patriots' tapes
that the NFL destroyed in what is now known as Spygate.
I don't know if you know about this, Bri, but.
I don't think I am familiar with this one.
Yeah, the NFL came down hard on the Patriots because apparently they were filming other teams' practices.
Okay.
Taking those tapes and then, you know,
analyzing them and getting
defensive plays off of those.
Like Death Star shit, finding a weakness.
Looking to get an edge.
but they did the investigation was you saying cheating cheating you didn't say cheating if it was true
i believe it was and um they did an investigation and roger goodell the commissioner not not our commissioner sunday but a real commissioner
hasn't been named in the last 15 minutes
he destroyed all the videotapes really yeah which leading to people going like well we're on those videotapes yeah did they did they have the rams
on videotape when they won that first Super Bowl?
That's the big fucking.
We'll never know.
Well, now we will, Kamish, because I have proof here in one folder of that, or
I have this other story we can reveal.
Why was New England Patriots cornerback Malcolm Butler benched in the Super Bowl against the Eagles when Tom Brady threw for 10 miles in that game, threw
was almost perfect, and the fucking Patriots trotted out some fucking stumble bums to play corner because they benched Malcolm Butler.
And nobody knows the reason why.
Why that Belichick wasn't hurt, wasn't injured.
Nothing.
There's been rumors out there that he fucked the wife of a coach,
punched Belichick's son, who's also a coach.
Would he be disciplined?
No, he wouldn't be on the team, though.
Wouldn't they discipline?
The night before the Super Bowl this happened.
Bang him boots.
It's fucking a salt.
Yeah, but I'm saying punches somebody's son is a fucking salt.
Right, but you know, this happens, though, in the locker room.
Like, players, you don't think there's any dust-ups in sports between?
Yeah, but I'm saying if somebody punches a coach's son,
I feel with this segment, like, you know, when you used to, like, when you were young, you'd light a firecracker and it would fizzle and you'd wait for the explosion and then you're like, damn, it's a dud.
This is a dud?
This is a total dud.
There's people out there want to know these questions, namely me.
Well, guess what?
What are you going to do if you don't know the answer?
You're not going to know the answer between us.
Why?
Which one would you rather know?
What was on the tapes?
Why Belichick benched Malcolm Butler?
I would probably lean towards if they did film the Rams.
Wait, Malcolm Butler was the one who fucked the.
I'm not saying these are true.
These are just rumors that I saw on YouTube.
Okay.
That he was in an affair
with a coach's wife, not Belichick, but a younger coach.
Oh, a younger coach, right?
And they never disclosed.
Not an 80-year-old woman.
Although Although Belichick's married to like a fucking 30-year-old.
Oh, is she?
They never disclosed anything about this guy during the game, before the game.
Remember, he was crying during the national anthem and like Malcolm Butler was crying and he was unconsolable.
Why?
I mean, it's just.
And then, and that fucking some scrub named Nick Foles goes on to fucking score on every drive, every possession he scored on the Patriots, costing Brady a ring because Belichick was so arrogant.
Or they didn't film the Eagles that year.
No.
This loss is on Belichick
by benching Malcolm Butler.
You think he would have made that much of a difference in the game?
All they needed was one stop.
Brady scored on almost every possession as well.
He threw for 10 miles in that game.
Nobody has ever thrown for more yards in a Super Bowl than Tom Brady did in that loss.
And Belichick fucking still would not put out his best corner that entire game.
Oh, sounds like this is a question for you to answer.
You're the finish.
I'm putting you in the hot seat.
Yeah, which one?
These both obviously affect Walt tremendously.
So, like, which do you think?
Which do you think Walt wants to know more?
He wants the cornerback one.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Yeah, I'm going to give it to you.
I'm going to give you the pass.
It affects hardly anyone.
You're not going to find out by the end of the fucking podcast anyway.
So I can say, well, you know, yeah, Mickey Mouse was there.
It doesn't really fucking matter.
Droopy.
Yeah, droopy.
Like, the question before is like, hey, do you want to find out why your grandma died?
And if the government's complicit, then the next one is like, here's a bunch of guys with a bunch of football shit nobody cares about exactly
you fucked a coach's wife
your bench buddy
i like this segment though the commission all right it's a good one because i like to see how sunday jeff like mulls it over turns it over in his mind
i don't think he gives a lot of uh forethought though into like the implications though he's just so he's ready to fucking go in there like a teenage boy and be like i want this one being out there the truth right you don't really think about the fucking domino effect, though, if you pick the wrong truth, though.
Like Bryce said, we could have fucking blood in the streets with the wrong choice, Kamish.
Yeah, well, that's that would be all, it would be all on him.
That goes to my toy days, you know, when I just like, just grab it.
You could always return it.
Just grab it.
Don't think about it.
Just grab it.
You can always return it.
There's not many more conspiracies, though.
Like, I was racking my brain.
That's why the last one was a football.
A lot of conspiracies.
Thank you, Sunday, for yeah, thanks for coming in, pitching in.
While Q goes out and
does his famous Hollywood thing.
Hollywood.
How long has he been gone?
Just a week.
Just a week.
Oh, that's not bad.
I'll fill it.
All right.
Anything else?
No ads, huh?
No ads?
No, yeah.
I spoke to our ad person.
She said
last week of January plus the winter is it's just a slow time.
It's just a slow time.
So all you got to know is right now is go to patreon.com slash tellemsteve dave.
Yep.
And you can be one of the record-setting number of people who finally have figured out what kind of choice.
You feel like you're part of an exclusive, cool club.
And
if you liked what you heard today,
you like Sunday Jeff?
There's plenty of Sunday Jeff on that page.
Yeah, but not as much football talk, though.
Don't worry about that.
We haven't done Punk Bats in a long time.
Incoherent, ill-thought-out
commentary?
Yeah, it's only to flip-flop on a dime because somebody else brings up a good point.
Total nonsense.
How many listeners do do they got?
Just for curiosity.
How many listeners do you have on Patreon?
Too many to count.
Yeah, Patreon, they did the analytics and they said it's too many to count.
They said
they need a new calculator.
We burnt the old one out.
Yeah, like Google's scratching their heads.
They don't know what to do.
Are we the number on Patreon?
No.
No fucking way.
Not even close to it.
Tell them, Steve.