#525: The Hammer

Speaker 1 I didn't fuck him, I blew him.

Speaker 1 You don't think lettuce

Speaker 1 letters.

Speaker 1 That's all you fuck to

Speaker 1 point. Sorry.

Speaker 2 Tell them, Steve, Dave.

Speaker 1 Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell'em Steve Dave. I'm here with Waltz.
Yo. And with Q.
Hello.

Speaker 1 Boys, what a day. What a day.
I almost didn't come today. Why, what happened? I don't know.
I'm not feeling that great. Feeling ill.
I don't have COVID, though. You're along to the weather?

Speaker 1 A little bit. Because I took a test.
I took that rapid test. What are you feeling? Just like sweaty and like I have the symptoms of COVID, but don't have COVID.

Speaker 1 Well, it's sweat. It's being sweaty.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you might not care because I'm out in the sun.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like

Speaker 1 my voice is going

Speaker 1 to be raspy throat and shit. Yeah.

Speaker 2 When you opened the show just now, I was impressed with how fast your

Speaker 2 speed of your speech was.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was like you're people know.

Speaker 2 You sounded so excited. I was just like, man, he's so energetic.

Speaker 1 And then immediately

Speaker 1 shit.

Speaker 1 So what's up with Socks? Socks going on. Oh, man.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it was the craziest freak accident ever.

Speaker 2 The other day, I was coming into

Speaker 2 the TST Town General store, and I loaded up the dogs.

Speaker 2 And I only got like four or five houses down from my house when I heard this

Speaker 2 insanely loud

Speaker 2 explosion or it sounded like something crashed. I thought a car had rear-ended me, although I didn't feel any ambulance.

Speaker 1 What time of day was it?

Speaker 2 Probably like noon. Okay.
So, you know,

Speaker 2 noon in the afternoon. And

Speaker 2 then I heard, like, and I never want to hear it again, the most blood-curdling like scream from Sox.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 2 and I just thought, mate, did somebody throw something through the car? I could not figure out what had just happened, though.

Speaker 2 So, I immediately pull over to the side of the road, and she's caught a caught between the back seat and the front seat, you know, where you put your feet if you're sitting in the back seat. Yeah,

Speaker 2 and I pick her up, and I'm looking, I'm like feeling her around. And I noticed that her

Speaker 2 leash is not on

Speaker 2 her vest, on her harness.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 it turns out what must have happened, the only thing I could theorize is that the leash was hanging out a little bit out of the car, and I didn't see it when I closed the door.

Speaker 2 And I guess it got locked

Speaker 1 and caught on the wheel. But the leash isn't that long, though.
Yeah, it seems unlikely.

Speaker 2 I really don't know what the fuck happened. That's the only thing I think happened because I look down the street and the fucking leash is outside the car, though.

Speaker 1 And the hook, it just ripped her.

Speaker 2 It just ripped right off of her body.

Speaker 1 Oh my God.

Speaker 2 It must have been terrifying.

Speaker 2 And then she was limping and I had to take her to the emergency room.

Speaker 2 And they're like, it could be a three-hour wait.

Speaker 2 So I was like, and then she started walking on it. So I was like, okay, I'm going to take her home.

Speaker 2 But then when we got home, and then she wasn't walking on it, so I went back at like 12 o'clock at night to the emergency room, the pet emergency room. And I didn't get out of here until almost four.

Speaker 1 The wait was still that long? Well,

Speaker 2 every time that it was my turn, another dog would come in that had more of an emergency than Sox had.

Speaker 2 So there's only one doctor, so I kept putting, you know, being had to wait for him to look at a different dog who may have swallowed

Speaker 2 something.

Speaker 2 The owner said he thinks that the dog swallowed something. So they got to look at that dog first because it's just her paw.
But thankfully, she didn't break anything.

Speaker 2 I mean,

Speaker 2 if you had heard the yelp, I would have thought she was dead. Oh, man.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 Like, oh, I can't stop hearing it

Speaker 2 in my head when I close my eyes, you know, Because it could have been way worse.

Speaker 1 I mean, it was. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Could you imagine looking back and she's decapitated or something? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It was so insane.

Speaker 2 The sound was like nothing I've ever heard before. Not just the yelp, but the sound, I guess, of the snap

Speaker 2 of

Speaker 2 the hook.

Speaker 1 Oh, my.

Speaker 1 God, man.

Speaker 2 It was like a sonic boom or something.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and so it just yanked her out of the seat, huh?

Speaker 2 It yanked her down.

Speaker 2 And then it had the hook.

Speaker 1 Thankfully, it was an old leash.

Speaker 2 So maybe the hook came off

Speaker 2 easier than maybe a new leash. I don't know.
But yeah.

Speaker 2 But she's doing way, way better now.

Speaker 1 Good.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And the doctor's like, you can't let her run for two weeks.

Speaker 1 I'm like, that's impossible.

Speaker 1 Stop the dog from running. She was running before we got here, even with the,

Speaker 2 I can't get her to stop running. Yeah, it's almost impossible.

Speaker 1 It's like, here's the news. She's faster than I am.
So she runs away.

Speaker 2 Don't let her jump. And I'm like, okay.
So every time I'm cognizant of her, I look at her. I'm like, you want to go up there? And

Speaker 2 before I can even bend down, she's already jumped already.

Speaker 2 But yeah,

Speaker 2 I'm so thankful, though, because, like I said, I could have

Speaker 2 pulled the car over and looked, and I was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm going to see. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I do not know what I'm going to see after hearing that fucking shriek. Oof.

Speaker 1 Thankfully, it was just like a mildly hurt dog.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Like, the doctor said, probably, like, that little joint where you can move your paw up or down.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 He said that felt like it was probably a little inflamed, and they just gave me some inflammation medicine. And they took x-rays, and there was no nothing there.

Speaker 1 Well, she's sleeping it off now.

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, she's on medicine.

Speaker 1 That'll probably, oh, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 She's on

Speaker 2 whatever medicine he gave me. So he said it might make her drowsy.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. Well, so did the

Speaker 1 visit cost you more than the dog?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 It was expensive, but not as much as the dog. No, no.

Speaker 2 I have pet insurance, though.

Speaker 1 Oh, do you? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Once well, like, she's also had to have her toe taken off.

Speaker 1 I remember that. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 So, like, the pet insurance was the greatest purchase we've made since getting the dogs, especially socks. I don't know why.
She's more.

Speaker 2 She's constantly having something go wrong and have to get fixed.

Speaker 2 And but yeah, she had like some sort of like a cut on her toe and it it didn't heal right and the doctor was like, I'm a little worried about this. We could just cut it off

Speaker 2 and she'll be fine. And he was right.
I mean, she doesn't show any limitations for not having that toe, but

Speaker 2 that was expensive surgery to take the toe off.

Speaker 1 Sure, toe removal, man.

Speaker 1 Wow. Is it because she's a purebred? She is purebred, right?

Speaker 2 I mean, they say she was, but I really don't know.

Speaker 1 My sister was sold to Jack Russell Terrier only to find out later on it was a rat terrier.

Speaker 1 Paid heavily for it.

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, I paid so much for Cooper, and the doctors tell me there's no way he's pure, bread.

Speaker 2 He's got some English bulldog in him, they say. Really? There's no doubt that he has English bulldog in him.
They said.

Speaker 1 We should do a DNA test.

Speaker 1 Can I submit it to the insurance who are sick of hearing from me as it is?

Speaker 1 Talking to my dog.

Speaker 2 My rates go up because of how many fucking

Speaker 2 claims I put in.

Speaker 1 Really? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I guess they must, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Shit, man.

Speaker 1 Pet insurance. You don't have any pet insurance, do you? No, I don't.
Yeah, me neither. I should have before Princess Mitch.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was thinking of getting it at one point, but I found there's a lot of hoops you got to jump through with stuff. Yeah.
And

Speaker 1 I didn't want to jump through anything.

Speaker 2 But one surgery can make it well worth it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know. It also seems like cats just aren't as

Speaker 1 likely to get into situations like that. No, I mean, I see indoor house cats.
I see this with Princess Mitch, you know, costing a lot of money.

Speaker 1 But yeah, like an indoor cat versus a dog who goes outside and might happen upon a fucking

Speaker 1 squirrel or something. And then next thing you know, he's fucking eating them and he's getting sick and shit.

Speaker 2 You can get sick from eating a squirrel?

Speaker 1 Probably. I don't know.
Let's ask Maxwell.

Speaker 1 I was thinking, Q,

Speaker 1 only because Walt brought it up to Giddam.

Speaker 1 Is there a chance that we can see a lot of fringe on Impractical Jokers?

Speaker 1 Giddam was talking about getting a fringe jacket, right?

Speaker 2 He saw an old video with somebody wearing a fringe jacket and he said, I want to get a fringe jacket.

Speaker 1 Oh, boy.

Speaker 2 And I don't know. I mean, fringe screams 70s to me.
I don't know if it's in anymore.

Speaker 1 Oh, I wouldn't know, but I do know he probably shouldn't be wearing fringe. Why? I don't know.
He's got a lot going on.

Speaker 1 Does he need another

Speaker 1 short detail?

Speaker 1 I mean, I thought...

Speaker 2 I was very supportive of his fringe interest.

Speaker 2 I thought it would be good for him to

Speaker 2 get a little bit more fashionable. What type of...

Speaker 1 well, we don't know if it's fashionable, one, but two.

Speaker 2 Well, it's got to be better than the fucking TSD shirts he constantly wears everywhere.

Speaker 1 But he's not going to stop wearing them, is my point. They'll be underneath the jacket.
Yeah, they'll be underneath the jacket. But that's where Walt had a better idea.

Speaker 1 That get him actually wear a fringe shirt underneath the fringe jacket. And then we're thinking fringe pants and a fringe hat.
Now I'm totally on board.

Speaker 1 We figure there's got to be somewhere in a practical joker you can work in a lot of fringe. I mean, a lot? I can work in some fringe without an issue, I think.
But

Speaker 1 what is the payoff here?

Speaker 1 That's why you got paid the big money because you got the fringe. Yeah, sure.
All right. I mean, I'll look for fringe areas that I could put in.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 I don't think he needs the fringe.

Speaker 2 You're serious.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't think he needs the fringe. Or you think he can't wear the fringe.

Speaker 2 He wants a suede jacket with fringe. And I was thinking, you know, it's like, okay, I got his Christmas present.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, you should get it.
He's just got to

Speaker 1 build around it a little bit. I don't think he's just throwing that on what he currently wears.

Speaker 1 We know guys that could rock a fringe jacket. Sure.
And you would be like, that's totally them.

Speaker 2 But you don't think he's one.

Speaker 1 Well, who comes to mind when you think that? If Scott Mosier showed up in a fringe jacket, I'd probably still be like, what's up, fringes?

Speaker 1 I would probably also look at him and be like, ah, fuck, he makes the fringes look good. He's selling the fringe.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he was wearing a fedora for a while, and everybody was like, how the fuck is he? He makes a fedora look good. Look at him go.

Speaker 1 You know, so I think Mosier could definitely pull it off, but I don't know if Giddam's on that same.

Speaker 1 I imagine Giddam with it with his shorts

Speaker 1 and his giant calves and whatever fucking Meryl shoes he's wearing that week, and then just like a fringe jacket on. Like, you can't wear a jacket with shorts.
Remember,

Speaker 1 oh, God, what was that kid's fucking name? Derek Thompson, I think it was, in high school.

Speaker 1 in gym class he always wear shorts oh and a leather jacket always wearing that leather jacket yeah

Speaker 1 with shorts yeah yeah it's a it's like fonzi when he put on the water skis and jumped the shark with the jacket on yeah with his trunks and jacket wow so get him would just do everything he does normally with his jacket on

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 2 I was very supportive of this, but I might have to

Speaker 1 give your opinions on it. No, no, no.
Let him wear the fringe. If he wants to wear it, wear it.
Who am I to say? What do I know? Yeah, I'm probably dressed the same as him right now.

Speaker 1 You know, I'm wearing a t-shirt and shorts. But would you add a fringe jacket to it? Not to this.
To top off the ensemble.

Speaker 1 Not to this, but now I'm wondering if there is a place for me in life with a fringe jacket. I feel like I couldn't even do it as a joke.
Have we looked him up?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I haven't looked it up, but I figured they can't be that hard to find. Fringe.
I remember Dave Windorf used to wear a fringe vest.

Speaker 1 Did he?

Speaker 2 Yeah, no shirt.

Speaker 1 Get the fuck fuck out of here. On stage? No.
Just like to the comic book store. Working at the comic book store.

Speaker 1 You know, I mean,

Speaker 1 he pulled it off because I was just like,

Speaker 2 you know, damn.

Speaker 2 But he was, you know,

Speaker 2 he was younger and he, you know.

Speaker 1 Could support the, I mean, look, Amazon's got that for like, it's like 100 and change.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, that's what I'm going to get him for Christmas. Yeah.
Yep. It's $150 for an XL.

Speaker 2 Probably 2XL.

Speaker 1 2XL is still $150. Oh, well, yeah, only 4XL.

Speaker 2 I better get 3XL.

Speaker 1 Yeah, get 3XL, 140. I mean, look, like.
You want him to be able to zipper it up or button it up, not just

Speaker 1 tie all the fringe together and keep it closed?

Speaker 1 It takes him 12 hours to get out of the house in a snowstorm.

Speaker 1 He just keeps tie it up literally.

Speaker 2 I'm not going to take it off.

Speaker 1 It just takes too long wherever he goes. He's in the shower with it.
Does he not.

Speaker 1 Who did he see wearing fringe?

Speaker 2 We were watching old music videos,

Speaker 2 and I think it was David Cassidy or

Speaker 2 some other performer.

Speaker 1 Classic black leather jacket.

Speaker 2 He doesn't want black leather. He wants brown.

Speaker 1 Suede, the brown suede. All right.

Speaker 1 Saying something from the other room.

Speaker 2 He's listening from the other room, steaming.

Speaker 1 Probably

Speaker 2 a little tear when Q was like, he can't rock the fringe.

Speaker 1 He can do whatever he wants. He can't back me up.

Speaker 1 I just feel like it's a hat on a hat.

Speaker 1 Well, he has to change his whole look if he's going to go with the fringe, right? I think so. Not the whole look, but I think he's got a giant bell bottom.

Speaker 1 He's got to pull out a statement piece or two

Speaker 1 before he throws on a fringe, I think. He has to dress like the keep on trucking guy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. I mean, you know, get a black t-shirt, pair of like basic jeans, blue jeans, and I think it'd be all right.
Lose the graphic tees.

Speaker 1 Maybe trim the beard a little bit.

Speaker 2 Maybe a button shirt.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you know, well, t-shirt's fine.

Speaker 2 A jean shirt, like a jean button shirt.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that'd be nice. Faded.
Yeah. So now he's just going for a cowboy look.
It's like, that'd be awesome. I think that'd be great.

Speaker 2 I think he could rock the cowboy look easily.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think you're right. All right, let's get fringe jackets then.

Speaker 1 Go into it.

Speaker 1 Would it annoy him if we all got fringe jackets and he was the only one left out?

Speaker 2 I think it may be easier for him to wear his fringe jacket if it's in the support group.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 that's going to be a Patreon gift of fringe jackets.

Speaker 2 But, you know, he also, you know, he is weird, though. He may be like not wearing it just because everybody else has it now.
Right. You know, he's, you know,

Speaker 2 he's a wild card. You never know

Speaker 2 what's going to where it's going to set him off.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. All right.
I'm in. Okay.
All right. Get him in fringe.

Speaker 1 I was thinking,

Speaker 1 what if we had a competition for the Sunday Jeff show,

Speaker 1 Sunday Jeff versus Pam and pop culture? But it has to be like, it has to lean towards stuff Pam would know. It can't be like kaiju shit and like all that.

Speaker 1 That's that kind of stuff.

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, what are you considering pop culture? Is it like, is Pam

Speaker 2 like

Speaker 2 versed in current pop culture or is it like what did her pop culture end on a certain year?

Speaker 1 Dude, I don't know if it ever began. Except for that.
Oh, she's that bad. I think she's not that good.

Speaker 1 And I would pull it as current because I don't think Sunday Jeff knows a lot about current pop culture either.

Speaker 2 Right. Like, name three Beyoncé songs?

Speaker 1 Right, something like that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, Jeff couldn't do it.

Speaker 1 I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it either.
I could do it.

Speaker 1 Not off the last two albums, but like her earliest. I've never owned the Beyoncé album, but I mean, certainly she's.

Speaker 2 I heard that she's going back and removing things like George Lucas style from old songs that

Speaker 2 aged well, like a reference to Monica Lewinsky, I heard, or some other people. Oh, really?

Speaker 1 She's doing it.

Speaker 1 All right. Hey, man.
Well, there's somebody that, oh, Lizzo, like, she got called out, and I think it was Beyonce as well, got called out for using the word spaz. Spazz.
Now,

Speaker 1 growing up, to me, spazz always meant like you were just uncoordinated.

Speaker 1 You were like a nerd. Not that you were like.
Spastic, right? Yeah. But I guess in the UK, spastic is like the same as like, hey, retard or something.

Speaker 1 So over there, it's offensive. I got me noticed.
I've heard a lot more people.

Speaker 1 I think people are loosening up on retard a little bit because I've been hearing it a bunch lately. Yeah.
I've been like, really? I was like, is that word making a comeback?

Speaker 1 I was like, because I've heard it more than I ever have lately.

Speaker 2 I would think, though, that

Speaker 2 an American artist, if you're going to release

Speaker 2 your work in England where that word has a different meaning, then you censor it there. But in America, America, if it doesn't mean the same thing, I feel like

Speaker 2 you can go spaz in America.

Speaker 1 You could say spazz in America, I think.

Speaker 1 Unless the Twitter mob has gotten a hold of it. Oh, well, I'm sure they have.

Speaker 1 Just because we haven't seen it. But yeah, I don't know, man.

Speaker 1 I never used the word spaz, so I guess.

Speaker 2 It's not a word that was really heavily used by myself either anywhere.

Speaker 2 Maybe, you know, when someone took a bad shot, I'm going to play in basketball. I'm like, you know, you would be like, look, that's spazz.

Speaker 2 But it's been so long since I probably dropped Spaz casually.

Speaker 1 We should bring it back. They're all trying to get rid of it.

Speaker 1 Fucking references. French jackets ramp up our efforts.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't agree with it. I don't like it.

Speaker 1 I don't like going back and changing shit just because the times have changed. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean... Unless it's incredibly offensive.
But like I said, Spaz is open for interpretation.

Speaker 1 Let us have SPAS.

Speaker 2 Well,

Speaker 2 there's a history or there's some things that we can look at that have been changed for the better, like Han

Speaker 2 not shooting first. They went back and made Greedo shoot first, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, nobody liked that, though. You know that.

Speaker 1 What are you trying to do here?

Speaker 1 Okay. That was a terrible idea.

Speaker 2 Okay, how about NET, though, when all the government,

Speaker 2 the men in black,

Speaker 2 carrying walkie-talkies instead of long guns.

Speaker 1 I don't get it. I don't get it.
You like that better?

Speaker 2 Threatening the kids, though, maybe.

Speaker 1 But who? What?

Speaker 2 You know, when kids are watching this movie, maybe they don't want to see, you know,

Speaker 1 I mean, look, I saw the movie when I was a kid and it was fine. Like, I wasn't like, what's that scary man doing holding

Speaker 1 gun?

Speaker 1 But do you think with like the since like the late 90s, all these school shootings and shit, kids are more sensitive to guns?

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's more,

Speaker 2 you know, it's more concerning

Speaker 2 to see just a gun.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I mean, E.T., I don't know how many kids are going are like kids who are growing up now or watching E.T.
though.

Speaker 1 It has to have plummeted drastically since the early 80s. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't, you know, look, if it's Beyonce going back and changing her stuff,

Speaker 1 I can live with it. If it's Bielberg going back and changing his own stuff, I can live with it.
It's when other people go back and change. That's where I would start to be like,

Speaker 1 I don't know, you're making changes and stuff that you weren't the original artist on. That would probably bother.
But I haven't, are there even examples of that?

Speaker 1 Like, so far, it's just been people going back and changing their own work, to which, fuck it, it's their work. What do you want me to do?

Speaker 1 I'm thinking called out like that Lizzo lady she got called out for. Yeah.
As opposed to being like, oh, wait.

Speaker 1 I recognize this as something that I shouldn't have written. But I think that's actually a pretty current, the Lizzo thing.
The Beyonce shit's old.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I guess. Like, that's

Speaker 1 yeah, but I don't have a problem with artists going back and monkeying, especially if the originals are around. I mean, who gives a shit? Who cares? Who fucking cares? Lizzo.

Speaker 1 I couldn't even know that to someone I could have named one of their songs.

Speaker 1 That doesn't mean they're not a good artist. It just means, like, how could I get her? Very popular.
She's very popular with the heavy set lady crowd. Great.

Speaker 2 But what about Monica Lewinsky, though?

Speaker 1 What about her?

Speaker 1 Doesn't she still deserve to be mocked?

Speaker 1 Does she

Speaker 2 not warrant her place in history to be referenced in a song, you know, or should

Speaker 1 consider?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 2 I have no idea.

Speaker 2 Or

Speaker 2 was she just

Speaker 2 not an innocent, but a naive young lady who got caught up in a power struggle that she had in no way, shape, or form been around because she was way over her head?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know what her. I don't remember.
I mean, I was alive during that time, and I remember.

Speaker 1 I remember the circumstances. I remember being like, who gives a fuck? I just remember being like,

Speaker 1 when they were going after Clinton so hard, this was what, mid-90s? Yeah. I was like,

Speaker 1 who cares? And I guess I never went back to reevaluate it.

Speaker 1 I always just thought it was Republicans going after him because he wasn't a Republican, but maybe their point was like, well, you're a president.

Speaker 1 I know it definitely wasn't like looking out for this poor girl nobody was like

Speaker 1 you know today they'd be like how could you do that the imbalance in power and all that stuff back then nobody was saying that it was just this guy's a fucking liar but like

Speaker 1 it seemed so insincere to me because it was like well he's a politician so I know he's a liar so it's like why are you guys nailing him to the wall because he fucking didn't want to admit that he cheated on his wife dude Wiz bro code on this like you guys are fucking like dragging this guy over the fucking coals like you're making him get on the stand and talk about cheating on his wife.

Speaker 1 Like, leave the guy alone, man. Like, those are just policies.
You got the lyric? I got the lyric.

Speaker 1 It seems like Beyonce also got called out for using the word spaz. Oh, it's that prevalent in today's music.
Spazzing on that ass, spazz on that ass.

Speaker 2 That's the context is everything. I think anybody who spazzes on ass,

Speaker 1 you have to pay okay in my book. You gotta.
You gotta. Like, if you're not half-hearted, if you're not spazzed,

Speaker 1 you're not fucking.

Speaker 1 I don't want my sex style to be described as spaz.

Speaker 1 Oh, you do.

Speaker 1 If I fucking marry Beth, I want her to be like, I'm getting fucked by a retard.

Speaker 1 So, man. I'll be like, I'm spazzing on your ass, girl.

Speaker 1 I don't know if that's

Speaker 1 true.

Speaker 1 This is not the reputation I want.

Speaker 1 I think it's all again, it's all about how you

Speaker 2 perceive someone's spasm.

Speaker 1 But if you're like going to town,

Speaker 1 you know, you have spastic, uncontrolled maneuvers, spastic-like, like gyrations. But it's like all over, like you're vibrating.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 I guess, yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, it just seems like an odd, like, what did you want? More like manly, controlled,

Speaker 1 powerful thrusts rather than like

Speaker 2 always the voice of reason. I didn't think about that.

Speaker 2 When you first said that, spasmed on that ass, I was like, fuck yeah.

Speaker 1 I want to start using that.

Speaker 1 Well, look, if Beyonce had it in a song, then it's probably a good thing. I mean, I would say she's probably a more accurate

Speaker 1 bar of what's desirable than Brian Quinn.

Speaker 2 But what's the Monica Lewinsky lyric?

Speaker 1 The Monica Lewinsky one is. Hold on a second.
Let me find it.

Speaker 1 I just had it. Okay.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 she's. Oh, wait, no, that's the same article.

Speaker 1 Okay. So she's removing the spaz that's called an ableist slur since it's

Speaker 1 against people with cerebral palsy.

Speaker 2 That's the one she's going back and removing.

Speaker 1 That's what she's going back and removing.

Speaker 2 But isn't she getting like there's a movement to try to get to remove the Monica Lewinsky stuff, too?

Speaker 1 Yes, well, Monica Lewinsky herself tweeted to Beyonce. Ooh.
She said, um, while we're at it, hashtag partition, Lewinsky

Speaker 1 tweeted. And partition is a track from the singer's 2013 self-titled fifth album, fifth studio album.
In this song, Beyonce sings that a man, Monica Lewinsky, all on my gown.

Speaker 1 Monica.

Speaker 1 It doesn't even really make sense.

Speaker 1 Yeah, wouldn't Bill Clinton's all over my gown be a better. That would be a better thing.

Speaker 2 Well, you do remember the blue dress, right?

Speaker 1 Of course, of course. She kept it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, as a memento.

Speaker 1 Turned out to be good for her, right?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Yeah, I don't know.
If she's still like in 2022 being like, can you take my name out of your song from 10 years ago? 10? Yeah, 2013. Yeah.
Oh, okay.

Speaker 2 The incident was much longer ago. Oh, no, no, yeah.

Speaker 1 So while back.

Speaker 2 Could you deal with

Speaker 2 your significant other keeping an article of clothing that somebody had

Speaker 2 secreted on?

Speaker 1 Would you want to keep her teeth? Because that's the answer I have. What do you mean?

Speaker 1 Because if suddenly

Speaker 1 we've been packing because we're moving stuff.

Speaker 1 You find our article clothing on weird screen.

Speaker 1 I'm like, do you want to?

Speaker 1 Okay, like an exes. I got it.
I got it. Do you want this or should I throw it out? She's like, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 What do you want, Spaz?

Speaker 1 No, I would be very unhappy to find something like that.

Speaker 2 Right. You would be.
Why, though?

Speaker 1 Well, one, I would be like, what's the matter with you? Like, why would you keep that to begin with? And then, secondly, why would you bring it into our home?

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 2 You're an old-fashioned kind of guy.

Speaker 1 Go make my dinner.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I would think that you would be confident enough that

Speaker 2 it's just.

Speaker 1 But why didn't she wash it?

Speaker 2 Because it has the significant memories of.

Speaker 1 Just, why didn't Monica Lewinsky wash it? Show me the man that's confident enough that

Speaker 1 others like, oh, yeah, I have a dress with cum all over it. Not yours, by the way.

Speaker 1 I saved it for memories. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because it was such a great experience.

Speaker 2 So you have nothing in the realm of some sort of memento from a former Trist.

Speaker 1 Like a box of used condoms that are labeled with who I had them. A letter or

Speaker 1 why?

Speaker 1 Why? Yeah. Letters.
You don't dig letters differently. Letters, actually.

Speaker 1 Like you would have been happy to find a letter.

Speaker 2 I would think a letter is more threatening.

Speaker 2 Because the sex act is just, it's just a physical act. There's no, there could be, that could happen with absolutely no emotions.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but you save love letters. I would advise anybody that I dated to keep love letters and stuff like that.
I don't know. They're different.
Like a teddy bear, maybe.

Speaker 1 No, that's teddy bear. I say get rid of.
There's something about letters that are like a more specific anchor in time.

Speaker 1 Whereas like a, to me, whereas a teddy bear or a semen stained dress, I'd be like, but why didn't you wash the dress at the time? Like, you just

Speaker 1 told you. You see the stain there, right? Yeah.
Sure, but it's like stupid.

Speaker 1 It's self-explanatory. No, it's right.
I know what it is, but why do you have to be a story?

Speaker 2 Would you be like, do you have anything stained by me?

Speaker 1 And then she doesn't?

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 that would be an insult to injury. She would have anything stained by me.
I don't know, because she still has the tap is open. She could always still get something stained by you.
Right.

Speaker 1 Now it seems like she's doing it just because you're fucking crying about it. Yeah, she's like, all right, all right.

Speaker 2 Tonight, I'll wear this and you can put the stain on it, and I promise I won't wash it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'll keep it. All right.

Speaker 1 I might break up with someone over it. Really? I might.
Yeah. I'd be like, you kept a cum strain stained dress? Like, how bizarre is that?

Speaker 1 Is it evidence? Is it your uncle? Like, what? Like, then,

Speaker 1 I understand, but, like, if you're doing it just because every once in a while you what? Pull the dress out?

Speaker 2 And then she's all right. I didn't want to say this, but it was somebody famous.

Speaker 1 Well, more famous than you.

Speaker 2 It was somebody famous. I don't want to get into it, but it's just somebody of significant.

Speaker 1 Oh, she won't tell him. Oh, my God.
I mean, we're definitely breaking up at that point. It's like, well, all right, then just go fucking talk to your famous dude.
I don't care.

Speaker 2 I mean, I'm just holding on to it in case he gets even more famous. And then I can fucking flip it.

Speaker 1 But what do you want to be known as? The person that's fucking this person?

Speaker 1 How are you going to prove it's their cum? Because I didn't fuck him. I blew him.

Speaker 1 What do you think of a slush? I didn't think that far into it, Brian. Yeah, I didn't think I was going to be grilled to a third degree by some.

Speaker 1 I was saving it for our little, like putting it towards our nest egg. All right.
Well, the good news is

Speaker 1 the questions are all over. So good news.

Speaker 1 The grilling's done. The only question left is like, who's moving out? Me or you? Wow.

Speaker 2 I don't know if I would be, like, I guess maybe it's just, you know, getting older and growing up, but I don't know if I would be that

Speaker 2 ready to

Speaker 1 be outraged.

Speaker 1 I don't know if I could go nuclear over that. I wouldn't go nuclear.

Speaker 1 I would just be like, there's something so crazy here that you're that you like, what is it the memory of the sex with the guy that you want to maintain it? Like, I don't know.

Speaker 2 He was just famous.

Speaker 1 And you won't tell me who. Okay.

Speaker 1 It was the quiet guy from Penn and Teller.

Speaker 1 All right, keep the dress.

Speaker 2 It was a politician, and he may become president one day.

Speaker 1 I'm like some local guy.

Speaker 1 Somebody's like a

Speaker 1 local oms budsman or whatever.

Speaker 1 He's a parks and direct commissioner.

Speaker 1 I don't see the point of that. I'd be okay with the love letters, though.

Speaker 2 This is, you know, again, though, this, you guys are old school, you know, and that's good.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Love letters I would hate.
Love letters I would hate, too. I'd be like, burn them.
Burn them in my parks.

Speaker 2 Love letters would be, I'd be more, would be way harder to get over, like you say, the love letters than a dress with just a little slight stain on it.

Speaker 1 All nostalgic and shit. She's like, oh, I remember this day.
Oh, fuck you.

Speaker 1 I don't know that that's what they're doing. I think it's more just like you're going to forget about, like, there's probably info in that letter about your own life that, like, why wouldn't you?

Speaker 1 Like, if you want me to redact some stuff, I can go over the letters and like cross out like certain, certain stuff and shit like that. But

Speaker 1 I mentioned in her love letters to somebody else. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 Like, if it gets you that upset to see someone ta telling your woman how much they lo like if Cletus wrote Mary Beth a letter and was like, you know, I love you for all these reasons.

Speaker 1 Like, I love carrying your couches. Yeah, I don't know that that would upset me.
It's I don't I don't know. It's just like it's not it's not the it's it's not the the sentiments that he's expressing.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's the fact that she feels so strongly about hanging on to them.
But I'd be like, go back to fucking Cletus then.

Speaker 1 He said, nah, I have a I have a I have a shoebox of like all sorts of like photos and mementos and shit that I never go through to clean out.

Speaker 1 Like if there's a photo of me with an X in there, it's like I'm not going to pull it out because maybe my current girl doesn't like it. Like it's just a memory box.
It's up on the thing.

Speaker 1 I got to go through it. I got to update it every few years to make sure everybody's okay.
You got to.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 2 I don't know. It may be a double standard, though, that I like that, you know, because

Speaker 2 you deem those

Speaker 2 harmless.

Speaker 1 Well, what do you try to remember?

Speaker 2 She deemed the article of clothing harmless.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it's just like it's a trophy of some sex you've had. Yes.
So it's like,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 if you're thinking about sex,

Speaker 1 the only sex you should be worried about is what's going on tonight. That's it.
Don't even worry about yesterday. Just worry about tonight.
That's my thing.

Speaker 2 Is that

Speaker 1 healthy to have that mindset, you think? Yeah, I think so. Okay.
I do. All right.
Otherwise, you end up like a fucking guck.

Speaker 1 Hey, what's mine is mine man you know yeah no i i mean i'm just just asking but is it yours might not be sure now maybe not 100 now she's got that blue dress with that stain on it yep from the local politician oh i mean i got lucky in that like

Speaker 1 i've never run into a situation where oh maybe i have where like an ex of mine or a girl i'm seeing has like an ex out there with all sorts of video of her and stuff like that right i've not been in that situation i think i briefly was in but not with someone that I care enough to have having got worked up about.

Speaker 1 But I think that would probably bother me a bunch. Like some other guy reviewing your lady's tapes.
Can do it anytime he wants.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't be putting up on a revenge porn site if he felt like it. If he felt like it, I wouldn't be mad at her because of it, but I wouldn't like it.

Speaker 2 Could you use your

Speaker 2 elevated state

Speaker 2 to maybe buy the originals?

Speaker 1 For a million dollars. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, maybe. I bet you you could.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and he comes back with a price tag, and then all of a sudden you're like, you know what?

Speaker 2 I could live with that stuff.

Speaker 1 They're not videos of me.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Or I'd be like, can I buy the videos off you to review for my own for myself? Yeah, get cucked out.
Yeah, check it out. Buy a video.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I would not be too happy about that. But, you know, for all I know, it's happened.

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, we live in a world where that's going to be quite common for younger people.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 They're going to have to deal with that on a much more regular basis than

Speaker 1 a fellow

Speaker 2 your age. You were just getting in there on the cut.
Well, you know, you still, you know, it could still happen.

Speaker 1 Sex hatred super eight.

Speaker 1 Want to watch these? Maybe three hours to set up. The projector.
You want popcorn?

Speaker 1 You can't see most of it.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're right. Kids today are going to have to deal with that.
Yeah, absolutely. Because it seems harmless at the time.
It's like, oh, it's just like sending a text message. Right.

Speaker 1 But it's there forever.

Speaker 1 And anytime a woman has asked me to delete videos that she sent me, I have deleted them. But I don't think a lot of guys are like me.
No. I don't think so.
I think those are getting

Speaker 2 a little right there. Yeah, well, I've said

Speaker 1 since like the first year of this show.

Speaker 1 Leave me alone, pig.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like early on, my advice, really, this was when I was still in the fire department, was like, just always,

Speaker 1 you know, treat, if women are willing to send you videos of themselves, like you have to treat them with the utmost respect. So they continue to send you videos.

Speaker 1 You want their reputation as the guy who's a lockbox.

Speaker 2 You want to be the Sir Lancelot.

Speaker 1 You want to be, yeah. He's not Sir Lancelot.
Oh, he is. I am Sir Lancelot.
You're not. What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 I've never shown you a single photo of a girlfriend. I've never shown you a single video.
I won't do it. That's not my, that's my Lancelot.

Speaker 1 You said your ulterior motive, though, is to get them to keep sending it. Well, yeah, that's where Camelot falls, bro.

Speaker 2 Once Sir Lancelot shows you,

Speaker 1 not even you, I haven't been able to do that. I'm not showing pictures and videos.

Speaker 1 I wanted to see something.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's just not the way, man. You got to be the guy that girls are comfortable sending that stuff to.
Well, even if later on you're like, I hate this person for whatever reason. Still can't do it.

Speaker 1 I feel like at the moment that

Speaker 1 they sent you the video or let you tape them or whatever, they trusted you wholeheartedly that you weren't going to turn around and be a scumbag. Yeah.
So

Speaker 1 even if it's like, well, fuck them, I hate him now. I still feel the same way.
Like, still feel the same way. Yeah, like, what, how is it going to make me feel better by putting that out in the world?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Or showing somebody.
Yeah, it doesn't. It more wounds your soul than theirs.
You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 And I've had girls, like, I've broken broken up with women and been like, hey, and I've been like, do you want me to delete those videos and stuff like that?

Speaker 1 And some of them have been like, yeah, and some of them are like, you know what? I made them for you. Enjoy them.

Speaker 1 Even when you're breaking up. And I think.
Forward-thinking girl. Yeah, you know? And you know what? Like, sometimes you want to dust off those videos from like 15 years ago.

Speaker 1 Wait a minute.

Speaker 2 So you have the videos.

Speaker 1 Well, if... Well, today I probably don't because the computer changes here and there.

Speaker 1 Actually, probably on an old laptop somewhere.

Speaker 2 Is that, though, the equivalent of a dress hanging in a closet, though?

Speaker 1 I don't know. If you go up and open them and look at them, then maybe it is.
But if, like, I'm just too lazy to go through my old laptops every time I go into a relationship to.

Speaker 2 Can you get your assistant to

Speaker 1 yeah, I'm like, like some hardcore shit with him in it?

Speaker 1 Oh, there's nothing with me. No, never has been.
No. Never even sent a dick pic.
I sent one dick pic

Speaker 1 in my life, and

Speaker 1 I never did it again. Wow.
So you managed to get all the videos and pictures without really putting anything out there yourself. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's wise.

Speaker 2 That's what Brett Favre did. He only sent one.

Speaker 1 It almost brought him down.

Speaker 2 If you believe he only sent one.

Speaker 1 Right. Yeah.
That's true.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
One dick pic. Maybe two, but I think just the one.
Or Oscar De La Hoya. Remember, he had those pictures of him in like garters and ideals.
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 1 He was in like the fishnets and stuff like that. Yeah.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 But he didn't suffer. He's still doing like comedy.
He was going to fucking make fun of the guy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I wonder what that was about.

Speaker 1 Just an itch. Just loves it, huh?

Speaker 2 Just an itch when you got to scratch it. You got to put on your garters.

Speaker 1 I ain't here to hate. No.
Put them on. Put it on, bro.
I don't give a shit. I've long felt that way about guys who dress up as women for Halloween.

Speaker 1 I'm like, I think there's a small part of them that really is like, I can get away with it today without suffering any embarrassment or shame. But the rest of the year, they're like, I wouldn't mind.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's possible. Put on some ladies' clothing here and there.
Somebody, Brad Pitt, recently wore, I was told, a skirt. We were talking about this on set the other day.

Speaker 1 Brad Pitt wore a skirt to a movie premiere. And not a Scottish kilt or something.
Well, when I went to look, I was like, that looks like a kilt to me. It's only like a skirt.

Speaker 1 But I guess it begs the question, what's the difference between a kilt and a skirt? Yeah, I guess one has history behind it. The other is just some nice wear.

Speaker 1 But you look at those guys in the Middle East that wear those long, like, like

Speaker 1 flowing

Speaker 1 gowns. They look comfortable as fuck.
I'd like to wear them. Like a mumu? Yeah.
Like, how do you get like that? That's a moooooo. Just slip into it.

Speaker 1 There's no bullshit.

Speaker 2 Dude, this is perfect. You and get him.
He buys the fringe jacket. You buy the Middle Eastern

Speaker 1 MooMoo. Right.

Speaker 2 You guys just start rocking and cultivating a new look.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We'll be the forefront.

Speaker 1 They wouldn't get into any establishment. He's dressed like a fucking terrorist.
He's dressed like a fucking 70s Marlboro man

Speaker 1 in shorts.

Speaker 1 Hey.

Speaker 1 You probably recognize me from such TV shows as a practical joker.

Speaker 1 Look at me.

Speaker 2 They try to get into something like today's equivalent of Studio 54.

Speaker 1 Like, they're not going to get in. Like, where are they going if they can't get in?

Speaker 1 That's true. I hopper show.

Speaker 1 Yeah, more than a skirt. I'd love to wear a cape.
I wish capes would fucking make a return to society.

Speaker 2 Capes with a tux are still

Speaker 1 really? Oh, yeah. If you're a magician.
I think you can get away with it with a tux, but easier. Yeah, but I want like daily capes.
Like a mini cape or a regular shirt? No, like a cape.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, for the winter, not for like a summer.

Speaker 1 I want to have a summer cape.

Speaker 2 So is the summer?

Speaker 1 So like something that's like, what would keep you warm? Yeah, Shadow Rock home. Shows kind of thing? No, no.

Speaker 2 You know, football players basically wear capes on the sidelines. You ever see that shot of Tom?

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, they just throw it off when they're ready to go on. Yeah, I always thought of more of a blanket, but yeah, I see what you mean.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you could rock that, but I wouldn't want a cape cape, like a county with something tracticular, like fucking a huge collar.

Speaker 1 Yeah, not the collar, yeah, but like a yeah, take the collar off Doctor Strange and take the collar off.

Speaker 2 So, you want something red, though?

Speaker 1 That's a little

Speaker 2 bit too much, a red cape.

Speaker 1 I don't think I could pull off a red cape, but like a black with like a maybe a purple velvet interior, like a dark purple, you know what I mean? Like make it look like

Speaker 1 galactus purple on the inside, you know? Okay, something, something real, something regal. Yeah, I would love to wear that.
Do you have a tailor? I do not, no.

Speaker 2 I'm sure you'll, there'll be plenty reaching out to you after this episode.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is like everybody from Staten Island, like the real estate agent I'm working with is from Staten Island. Yeah.
And he has a guy for everything. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And that's Staten Island people.

Speaker 1 Staten Island people are like, I'm surprised to say. I could get a Taylor.
Oh, yeah. But I don't have one.

Speaker 2 You can probably, you just, you know, I'm sure you'll get people offering you now to send you

Speaker 2 a custom-made cape.

Speaker 1 But I don't want like cheap-ass capes, man. I want like a cape.
You hear that, people? Yeah. I don't want like cheap on them.

Speaker 1 I don't want like a fucking spirit Halloween like cape sent in. Like, that's all I'll get.
I want like a cape cape that I could wear, but it's not acceptable for me to wear it. Baron Rock.

Speaker 1 Who says it's not acceptable?

Speaker 2 I mean, who on earth has said that, like, no capes.

Speaker 1 Where have you ever? But nobody wears capes.

Speaker 2 Right, Right, because it's impractical.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Right?

Speaker 2 I mean, because it feels like it's just going to get in the way if you're doing something. Let's say you got to change a tire.
Now, all of a sudden, you got to worry about your capes.

Speaker 1 Love fluttering in the breeze.

Speaker 1 Well, I think somewhere along the line, like when people were wearing capes, somebody's like, why don't we just make a coat?

Speaker 1 That's when capes

Speaker 1 fell out of favor. It's for sale.
Let me see what we got here.

Speaker 2 This has got to be some sort of comic book thing, though, right? What do you mean? This has got to be some sort of like some subconscious desire to be a

Speaker 1 yeah, I believe so. Yeah, probably.

Speaker 1 Probably involved in that somewhere. But I also think they look fucking sharp, man, if done right.

Speaker 2 Yeah, because drawn by like Jim Lee, fucking Batman's cape looks fucking amazing.

Speaker 1 But when you see his fucking cosplayer,

Speaker 1 that's why I can't wake David rocking a cape that doesn't look as cool, though. No.
Look at the spaz in the cape. That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 I mean, there are capes, but none of them look good.

Speaker 1 None of them look good. Maybe they just don't look good.
I don't know. Look at this.
Women can get away with wearing capes

Speaker 1 pretty easily. Would you whip it around a lot? Yeah,

Speaker 1 express my displeasure. Yeah.

Speaker 1 As you walk away,

Speaker 1 stuff like that. It would be amazing, man.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Speaking of superheroes and capes, how did you guys feel about Batgirl getting shelved?

Speaker 2 Makes no difference at all. Was it something I would have never watched anyway?

Speaker 2 Again, it looks like something.

Speaker 1 Michael Keaton's in it as Batman. You wouldn't watch that?

Speaker 2 Oh, that's the one he was supposed to be in?

Speaker 1 No, he's in.

Speaker 1 He's in The Flash, but he's in that. That was the follow-up to The Flash, and he was in that.

Speaker 2 It looked like the stills I saw looked like WB fans.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it did. It looked pretty chintzy.

Speaker 2 And so there's no...

Speaker 1 So you could give a photo. It's like...

Speaker 2 I couldn't even be bothered to read the article. That's how little interest I had in it.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, it's based on the version, my least least favorite version of Bat Girl, which is like when they rebooted, there was like a tween in Burnside Heights, and I'm like, I don't care about any of this, so I didn't care, but I feel bad for everybody involved.

Speaker 1 Like, that's a lot of work when it's like an entire movie just to have some executive be like, yeah, and and as I'm in the Warner Brothers, you know, ecosystem over there, so it's like it's real concerning that they're cutting so many things.

Speaker 1 I'm like,

Speaker 1 uh-oh, but don't look this way,

Speaker 1 cover yourself up with your cape,

Speaker 1 Yeah, that sucks, but you know, what you can do. Yeah.
I can't figure out, though. They said that, like, the official word was that it was like a tax move.
Yeah, as a rough move.

Speaker 1 That's what I was told.

Speaker 2 Come on. If it was.

Speaker 1 It has to suck. It has to.
Oh, no, no, no. I was told it's not good.
And they said to fix it, it was going to, and this is just what someone told me.

Speaker 1 I don't know how looped in they are. Is that it wasn't, it looked real chintzy, like you said, and to fix it would have cost like tens of millions of dollars

Speaker 2 and they were like it's more valuable as a tax write-off than it is to put it money in and then release it and try and make the money back i know they had i saw in the the headline that i read though it was two movies scoob one was a scooby-doo movie and not nearly as much outcry or um

Speaker 2 people upset about the scooby-doo missed movie now the lost media that it will be this scooby-doo movie more people like scooby-doo than i thought like scooby-doo dude remember when bootlegging, when we were bootlegging, like at our highest output, we were just making fucking money hand over fist?

Speaker 2 Q,

Speaker 2 if you can get us those fucking background movie and the Scooby-Doo movie with your connections,

Speaker 2 we can start bootlegging shooting.

Speaker 1 Sure, you're going to be watermarked in your name.

Speaker 1 You can start selling them at the TSC television store. I'll see what I can do, I guess.

Speaker 1 That'll be my full career from now on. I'll just be working at the general store, running VHS.

Speaker 1 We would burn about DVD.

Speaker 2 We wouldn't sell many copies on VHS.

Speaker 1 You know who wrote that Scooby-Doo movie? No. The one that got shelved.

Speaker 2 I have no idea.

Speaker 1 Paul Dini.

Speaker 2 Mad loves Paul Dini.

Speaker 1 The creative Harley Quinn himself.

Speaker 2 So even a man of his stature can have projects just taken away and

Speaker 1 just shelved.

Speaker 1 Yep. True.
There's two guys who directed Batgirl also directed Bad Boys for Life, which I believe did well. I think it did.
I think they want to do another one, one yeah

Speaker 1 bad boys with will smith and yeah and martin lawrence so how old are these guys that they directed those movies no no the new one michael bay directed the first three

Speaker 1 and then they directed the fourth one uh i haven't seen miss marvel did you see miss marvel nope no i didn't see they directed that too we've never talked about it and i'm surprised what

Speaker 2 um

Speaker 2 it's been out for years now but uh stranger things i'm watching it and i'm all oh yeah it's great i haven't started the fourth season yet I'm dead.

Speaker 1 What one? I haven't started the fourth season yet.

Speaker 1 There's two episodes into the fourth season. Yeah.

Speaker 1 How come it's never come up?

Speaker 2 How come no one's ever been like, Walt, you should watch it?

Speaker 1 Because anytime I watch, I say something about watching TV, you're like, that's all you fucking.

Speaker 1 Sorry.

Speaker 1 Did I say Stranger Things?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, you're probably right. I would have been like,

Speaker 1 I know when to open my mouth.

Speaker 1 What a good show, though. Stage of things.

Speaker 2 What is so cool about it is, how come it's never been thought of before to

Speaker 2 lock in a group of characters at a young age and then just follow them

Speaker 2 and revisit them as they grow older?

Speaker 1 They've done that. I mean, those Before Midnight movies are they shoot one every 10 years, and there's.

Speaker 2 But this is a much more

Speaker 2 expansive and massive undertaking of making 10 hours every every couple years.

Speaker 1 Sure, but I don't think they planned it to do that.

Speaker 2 I think that just the success of it meant that they could keep coming back and show them as they grow older.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know that it was an experiment in watching these kids grow up.

Speaker 1 I think people, too, like it's kind of off-putting to see them grow up on screen. That's what I was going to say.
People like them when they're young, but to watch them grow up.

Speaker 2 I liked it. I like it, because

Speaker 2 I'm binged it this month, so I've watched one through three

Speaker 2 in probably in a month. So

Speaker 2 I thought it was interesting.

Speaker 1 Amateur.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, come on.
I'm El Brian Johnson. It'll be a couple days from me.

Speaker 2 But I thought it was cool and interesting to see them

Speaker 2 to go from one episode and then you start the next one and all of a sudden they're like a couple years older.

Speaker 1 Well, now like 11 has hair, right? Oh, yeah. So

Speaker 2 she looks like a senior in high school. Yeah.
Who's your favorite character, Q?

Speaker 1 Steve Harrington.

Speaker 2 Steve. Yeah.
Okay. Now he's 30-something years old.
Did you know that?

Speaker 1 Is he really? Yeah. Oh, fuck.
He's really good. I didn't know that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he plays a great teenager.

Speaker 1 I like Will.

Speaker 1 Are you up to date?

Speaker 1 Will Byers is your favorite character? Are you up to date? Yeah, I've seen every episode. How heartbreaking was it?

Speaker 2 I know what, Brian, I know you haven't seen it, but this is nothing that, but how heartbreaking was it when Mike came to visit him in California?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And he was like,

Speaker 2 You haven't even talked to me when you're going off to paint. All you care about is 11.
Yeah. And he's like, and Mike turned around and kind of yelled at him.
He was like, because she's my girlfriend.

Speaker 2 And like, you know, it's not just up to me to like keep a relation. Like he was like,

Speaker 2 oh, it was so well done. And I felt so bad for Will Byers.
Yeah, I think Will Byers is the breakout character.

Speaker 1 Really? Will Byers?

Speaker 1 I mean, what? I felt so sad. What about Justin? Like, everybody fell in love with him.
Oh, I like them all.

Speaker 2 I mean, I like them all.

Speaker 2 I love Hopper too.

Speaker 2 I love Hopper as well. But boy, Will Byers is

Speaker 2 really got one of the hardest.

Speaker 1 He's not even in the first two seasons ran him away.

Speaker 2 But boy, can he play? I felt so sorry for him.

Speaker 1 As he's growing up,

Speaker 1 he's in love with Mikey, right? Like,

Speaker 1 that's the subtext there, right?

Speaker 2 I don't know if that's where it's going, but it feels like.

Speaker 1 I think that's where it's going. That's where I read it's going.
Oh, really? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 It makes sense.

Speaker 2 I felt so

Speaker 2 much

Speaker 2 sympathy for him because he just feels like everybody kind of like he's the one that should have the most sympathy and the most attention paid to him because of what what he's gone through, yeah, and still no one's paying any attention to him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but he's kind of a fucking like nothing against the actor, but the character is kind of a fucking wet blanket. He's always like whining or he's always fucking over the trip.

Speaker 2 He's always the top job in the world to do because he doesn't get a lot of like meaty roles, but he's still got to play off.

Speaker 2 I think he's amazing.

Speaker 1 I think he's

Speaker 1 the actor's amazing. I think the character is a little bit of a wet blanket.
I'm surprised you're so.

Speaker 2 I just felt like I like

Speaker 2 just my heart ached for him when he confronted Mike in the roller skating room.

Speaker 1 That's great, man.

Speaker 1 That's great. I'm not going to try and take that from you, dude.

Speaker 2 You're not going to be able to.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to let you.

Speaker 1 But, I mean, give me a guy who in the first season is an asshole, Steve. Yeah.
And then turns out to be the fucking hero of heroes later on. Like, I love...
That's why I like Swearing so much, man.

Speaker 1 Like, you just meet people at their worst in a fucking horrible time, and then they turn out to be good people. I like redemption stories and stuff like like that.

Speaker 2 Great character, and

Speaker 2 it flies in the face of everything that

Speaker 2 I have thought I liked in entertainment because I hate kids saving the day.

Speaker 1 Hate it.

Speaker 2 And boy, there's a lot of kids saving the day in this, but they make up for the goofiness and the stuff that's like, come on, that's so unbelievable.

Speaker 2 With enough charm in other areas that I overlook, I can overlook the ridiculous things that happen. And there are no ramifications and no mental

Speaker 2 penalties made paid for seeing shit that would scar kids for

Speaker 2 and make them so fucked up.

Speaker 1 I think this season four is because I thought that season four actually showed a lot of the damage that these kids did.

Speaker 2 I've only seen two episodes and it looks like it is getting yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I thought it did a good job of that, but I also thought it did a terrible job.

Speaker 1 My main complaint about season four, and this isn't spoiling anything, is like it turns into one of those shows a little bit too much that it's like a kid out of nowhere is like, here's one fact, and then it's just like, wait a minute,

Speaker 1 that means this. And you're like, wait, what? And they're right, and everybody just jumps in on the plan, and the plan works.
And I'm just like, well, they do that a couple of times in season three.

Speaker 1 They do it in season three. Yeah, I just.

Speaker 2 I think they may do it in every season.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I guess it's just part of the 80s trope they're going for.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I love Strange and the Pops. The best.

Speaker 2 The best action hero that really isn't an action hero.

Speaker 2 He's constantly fucking punching people out, though. He's punching people.

Speaker 1 He's drinking. He's addicted to pills.
He's fucking fat. He's fucking fat.
I love it. He's just like the best, man.

Speaker 1 Was he in anything else before this?

Speaker 1 He was in the first Suicide Squad. Nothing that you, you'll notice him in things now.

Speaker 2 What was he in Suicide Squad?

Speaker 1 He was like one of Amanda Waller's, like

Speaker 1 the guy in the tie that was having dinner with her.

Speaker 2 Okay, but he wasn't with the heroes.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. He's that wasn't a main character.
You're going to start seeing him popping up and stuff, but he's such a great guy, like actor and stuff like that.

Speaker 2 Anything he's in, like, he's.

Speaker 1 He was Hellboy.

Speaker 1 He was the new Hellboy movie that came out. He's a new Hellboy.
Me neither, but he's Hellboy.

Speaker 1 That's interesting.

Speaker 2 It makes me want to see it then.

Speaker 1 Me too.

Speaker 1 But I heard it actually wasn't good.

Speaker 1 What was the name of it? Hellboy. Just Hellboy.
They just rebooted it, yeah. What year did it come out? Four years ago.
Wow. Yeah.
I really came out quietly then.

Speaker 1 I don't recall it at all. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And he was the reason I wanted to go see it.

Speaker 2 Does the music bother you, though? Because it seems like now they're just like constantly like just it's like listening to an album at a certain point.

Speaker 2 There's a song after song after song, and I get it.

Speaker 1 I'm not crazy about shows that do that, that, like, take a time period and just hammer, hammer you with their fucking nails. But season one, what's it? Uh, Cobra Kai did that, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 But I think they're doing it for like a comedic effect, no? Yeah, maybe.

Speaker 2 I don't know, but they, they also got away, though, from what I loved in season one was the John Carpenter synth type music constantly, and they kind of moved away from that, and they're like, we're just buying, you know, massive hits as opposed to like scoring, like, with that synth sound of the 80s.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Season four is like, it's a take on, I was sitting there, I'm going, it's a take on Nightmare on L Street.
The whole season is like a take on Nightmare on Elf Street, even to the point where

Speaker 1 the death, there's a death on the ceiling. Did you get to that yet? Episode one or episode two.
Where Eddie goes on the run because of it? Yeah, so I went to the bottom.

Speaker 1 And I was like, whoa, I was like, that's right from Nightmare on Elf Street.

Speaker 2 Even the thing that they see reminds me of it a little bit.

Speaker 1 But then later on,

Speaker 1 they cast Robin England in a role in it. And I'm like, oh, so this is obviously just a full-on nightmare analysis thing, which is great.
I love it. I have no problem with that.
It's phenomenal.

Speaker 1 I watched the first episode of Sandman. Oh, is that out now? On Netflix.
Came out today. I watched it this morning.
Good.

Speaker 1 Pretty good. I didn't like...

Speaker 1 I was going to sound lame to say my favorite character was a librarian, Lucian, and they made it a female in this.

Speaker 1 And I was like, oh, man, I was so looking forward to the guy with the hair and the fucking points going out in every direction. And I like that archetype, but they nailed it, man.

Speaker 1 Like, it's pretty good.

Speaker 2 Did they release a whole bunch or are they doing it like the

Speaker 1 whole first season? Yeah, Netflix style. Okay.
Yeah, so I got caught up on that. But it was, you know, it seemed like a one-for-one.
At times, almost beat for beat.

Speaker 1 The first episode is the first issue up until his escape. And is this set in a DC universe?

Speaker 1 I heard that there's a Constantine in it, but it's not.

Speaker 2 They're not referencing like a Superman or Batman.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 I don't, not as of yet. No.
Oh, is that Swamping thing where he makes a fucking weed grow? Was that?

Speaker 2 Well, there's also the Martian Manhunter scene where he goes to the dreams in Mars, right? He recognizes Morpheus.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think they're going to have that because I think most people will be like, who? Who's this Hulk?

Speaker 1 Is it Skinny Hulk? Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's something else that's coming out, right? Isn't it She-Hulk? She-Hulk, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I have no interest in that.

Speaker 2 That looks WB. That looks like Marvel's version of WB.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I just don't like two smart Hulks running around.
Like, they're just chatting at each other, and I'm like, who cares? But I love She-Hulk. I love the character.
I love the John Byrne runs.

Speaker 2 Snappy banter and shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm so sick of Snork and stuff. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Prey came out today, the new Predator movie. I heard that's good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'd heard the same. I heard it's really.
Is it not in theaters? I don't think so.

Speaker 2 How far have the mighty fallen that Predator was like an iconic franchise?

Speaker 1 Probably because of the last couple, Predator versus Aliens. People are like, oh, um,

Speaker 1 fucking.

Speaker 1 Wow. It's a great idea, I thought.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And the like

Speaker 1 Indian, American Indians, it takes place like 300, 400 years ago. Oh, really? And Predator comes to

Speaker 1 America before it's colonized and fights the tribes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a pretty fucking cool idea. I'm like, it sounds all right.

Speaker 1 And people I know who saw it are like, nah, it's pretty good.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 1 No ads?

Speaker 1 I think I stained my shorts with all this TV talk. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, no edge today.

Speaker 1 No spots today. Wow.
Not even meundies, which is usually good for.

Speaker 1 Yeah, what happened? Are we letting him down? I don't think so.

Speaker 1 Mary Beth told me that she's been contacting him, but like, I guess these people switch agencies so frequently that she's a hard time getting a contact in any one agency. Okay.

Speaker 1 So that's what she told me anyway. Then she told me to fuck off.
Oh, all right.

Speaker 2 Can we announce the upcoming winter plans?

Speaker 1 Oh, I think we should. Yeah, yeah.
I heard about them today, and I love them.

Speaker 2 So,

Speaker 2 branching off the success of the TSD Town General Store and the Bafo business we're doing here, we're going to open up

Speaker 2 a second location

Speaker 2 for a limited time: a satellite store in the Collingwood auction.

Speaker 2 A little stand inside, satellite booth.

Speaker 1 We're going back to where we made our bones.

Speaker 2 Going back home.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 There is an opening for a booth in the indoor part of the flea market, and we are going to

Speaker 2 put up stakes in November and December.

Speaker 2 And you can come down and visit the, I don't know, we need a name for the stand, though. Like the TSD outlet.

Speaker 1 The night fair? Can we call it the night fair?

Speaker 2 Need a snappy name for the stand because we're going to be selling, I guess, you know, shirts that we only have a few sizes in and just some of the stuff that's been kicking around.

Speaker 1 Well, personal items, too.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be clearing out. Q's Corner, right? Yeah, I'm going to be doing a table of all the shit I have that I don't want anymore.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be doing it real flea market style.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And that will be open in November and December on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays.
And our big Black Friday event will be at the Collingswood Flea Market.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 Not everybody lined up in the

Speaker 1 hallway here.

Speaker 2 No. Teenax.
But

Speaker 1 I mean, it's.

Speaker 1 Foam people. Oh, the foam people.
So, like,

Speaker 2 so not only do you get to see.

Speaker 1 You stepped in it.

Speaker 1 I don't know if they're there anymore. I hope not.
I don't know if they're there anymore.

Speaker 2 I was there. This is when I had the idea to do it.
I was there a couple weeks ago, and I was walking around on the indoor portion of the auction, and I didn't see that stand there. Yeah.

Speaker 2 But I may have just missed it. But weren't they selling like they were selling outdated fucking electronics?

Speaker 1 Yeah, like bongs and stuff. Yeah,

Speaker 1 it was a mishmash of shit. Bongs, and like you say, like old fucking Motorola phones.

Speaker 2 Didn't they have

Speaker 2 those scrunchie wires to old phones?

Speaker 1 Yeah, the

Speaker 2 wire called that goes from the phone to the telephone cord.

Speaker 1 I always just heard it called them. Yeah, it has a certain name of the curly one, though, right? Yeah, I mean, like, I can't remember.

Speaker 2 I mean, I know they'll probably be laughing at our wares when they see us set up and we're like, you guys think you're going to sell this shit?

Speaker 1 I don't see any curly wires on your table.

Speaker 2 I mean, we're selling calendars from three years ago that I have a profit of.

Speaker 1 We're going to be good again someday.

Speaker 2 I mean, yeah, but like, where else are you going to get this stuff, though? That's true. Other than at the whatever we name the

Speaker 2 stand. But not only will you get to come down and see somebody manning the stand or whoever will be there, but like you said, you had a great idea.

Speaker 2 We'll get in some TSD residents to come in and man the stand and sign for the day.

Speaker 1 I think so. Yeah,

Speaker 1 get Father Lance in there, you know, get Frank Five in there.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that's a great idea. And you can also go out and look at the real portion of the flea market, too.
All the things that we talked about

Speaker 2 for all these many years now, you can go see firsthand while also visiting us. It's great.

Speaker 1 It's a win-win. Nobody loses.
Nobody. Nobody.
Nobody loses. Got a pretzel,

Speaker 1 a slot car racing. Is that still there, right? That's gone.
Oh, man. Yeah, that's gone.

Speaker 1 I think that was gone the last time.

Speaker 2 You can see the stand where Dennis once, you know,

Speaker 1 lived, ruled.

Speaker 2 But it's really freaky though. You think about it, though.
It's like if you go back to that episode, Making Hay

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 2 now flash forward

Speaker 2 10 years. Yeah.
And now we're going to have a stand there just like Dennis did. It's pretty cool.
Maybe in 20 years, somebody's making a podcast about us.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 2 You know, inspired by meeting us at the flea market.

Speaker 1 That would be cool. Right.
Mocking us like we mocked everyone there.

Speaker 1 You should see these three old fools.

Speaker 1 They're going to sell this garbage.

Speaker 2 They romanticized this fucking dung heap on Route 33.

Speaker 1 They said it was going to be as good as Dennis's.

Speaker 1 I mean, what's wrong with this? Oh, I love it, man. Big news, though.

Speaker 2 Yeah. We talked about maybe doing a bus trip there, but I thought this was

Speaker 2 just better. It offers more people to come on their time frame because you got those, I don't know, I guess that was that eight weeks will be there.

Speaker 1 Eight weeks, yeah.

Speaker 2 Two months.

Speaker 1 Come do some Christmas shopping.

Speaker 2 Yep. It's open all year round, baby.

Speaker 1 This is something that you've spoken about for long before we started telling Steve Dave. You're like, when I retire, I want to work at a flea market.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Here you go.

Speaker 2 You're able to do that. I know the phone people are still there.

Speaker 1 They were good people.

Speaker 2 I saw the pickle lady. Nice.
So, you know, come down to Collinwood Flea Market.

Speaker 1 Did you eat a sandwich yet?

Speaker 2 Get a pickle and come over and see us.

Speaker 2 Buy a calendar from 2020.

Speaker 1 So that's going to be, what, November, December?

Speaker 2 November, December. Okay.
Yeah. We'll announce more.

Speaker 1 Book your flights now.

Speaker 1 It's hard to get a Q to come down here to record. What are the chances?

Speaker 2 He'll be down here.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 he'll be down here. Yeah.
He'll stay. Can't wait to walk by.
Yeah. The setup.

Speaker 1 You'll want to see his corner. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I got to get an accounting on how much my shit sold for. Can we spell corner with a K?

Speaker 1 Backwards K.

Speaker 1 Oh, I love it.

Speaker 2 I'm going to get a little sign made up in Q's Corner. Okay.

Speaker 1 Hang it over the table. Yeah, I think so.
And everything in Q's Corner

Speaker 1 will be stuff from my house that I'm looking to get rid of. And I won't even go on eBay and check to see.
I'll just make the price. You'll just make the price.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 yeah so you might even get a steal you know I got lots of shit people send me

Speaker 1 all for sale

Speaker 1 tons of it man these companies just send stuff to the office and stuff you know what I mean I'll just oh okay yeah

Speaker 2 I'll just I'll just put it all up for sale there okay it sounds good this is this is exciting this is the thing that has rejuvenized me and re-energized me because I was sagging a little bit but this one really feels good You were sagging, yeah.

Speaker 2 I didn't notice that, yeah, yeah, I was sagging for like a month or two.

Speaker 2 Like that duck, you ever see a duck under when his legs are going a million miles underneath the water? Yeah, yeah, that's what it felt like.

Speaker 1 It looks all placid up top, yeah, flaccid.

Speaker 2 No, never flaccid, flaccid up top.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 I spat on that ass.

Speaker 1 Tell him, Steve Dave.