#493: Potato Thighs

Like I could get spit on by some stranger to like right now and I would be like it's raining

Your waltz concerned he's gonna eat too many potatoes

The Asbury Park Press is like local celebrity loses his shit.

Tell him Steve Dave.

Hello, everyone, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave.

I'm here with Walt,

and I am here with notorious fat phobe Brian Quinn.

Fat phobe?

Have you not heard this cue?

No.

On Tumblr?

No.

They're coming after you for saying that you wouldn't date fat chicks, which made me feel kind of bad

because

you never said that.

I never said that.

In fact, I've said the opposite.

Still, you're taking lumps, I hear.

I didn't even know Tumblr was still a thing.

Oh.

Well, I never said it.

I've

said the opposite of that.

I said I've dated some girls with a little heft to them and

not seen anything to complain or apologize for.

Well, there you go.

How'd you find that?

Yeah.

I saw it on Twitter.

I got to apologize.

Like, right before you got here, I had a panic attack.

So, like, I'm not at the top of my game.

Why'd you have a panic attack?

What are you panicking about?

Nothing.

That's the thing.

They just come on for some reason, and I get very sweaty

and uh just don't want to move how did how did you did are these diagnosed as panic attacks or maybe they're are they could they be more no it's just not like i'm okay it's couldn't well not a mild heart attack or anything i don't think so yeah i mean

occasionally what's that i said oh man i i hope not yeah i mean you sure

No, I just get sweaty and I don't want to like move.

And I just, I'd have to hang out for like a half hour and then they'll go away.

Sometimes they'll take half his annex or something but how long has this been going on oh years

years

yeah have you heard of this

yeah I know he's I didn't know that it was so frequent that it was a thing I know it's happened once or twice I didn't know you were doing it like minutes before we recorded yeah like

I thought it would I thought it would go away so I was tempted to say like can we do 630

but then I was like I don't want to inconvenience everybody and it'll probably go away by then and And like, so just before you guys got here was when it sort of like started to taper off.

And you don't want to move.

What does that mean?

You don't want to move?

I just want to, I just like want to sit in bed or like lay, like lay on the couch or whatever so I don't have to.

I get shaky and sweaty and,

you know,

and it just makes me want to like sit there and wait for it to pass.

How long does it usually take?

Like half hour sometimes, 40 minutes.

Is this,

I mean, you could be honest with this.

Are you trying to one-up me?

Because last week I said I was like in a bit of a funk.

So you're trying to like

now you have a panic attack.

So it feels, everybody feels bad for you.

Is that what's going on?

We get a TV show.

You have to get a more successful TV show.

I take Sage to the community pool and you have a pool in your yard.

Got to talk you somehow.

Well, I saw through it, bro.

I exposed you.

And you have no idea what brings it on.

It could be absolutely nothing.

It's nothing, really.

Like, I was just laying in bed watching Deadwood earlier, took a shower, got out of the shower, just was going to lie in bed until you guys got here.

But

as soon as probably around 5:30, it started.

And I just

fuck.

And there's nothing I can do about it.

There's nothing.

And when was the last time you had one?

Probably a couple weeks ago.

And they're coming more frequently, you think?

No.

No?

No.

It's just, and there's no origin.

There's no like, oh, I'm panicking about doing the show, or I'm panicking about.

You were panicking about doing Tom Sea Grave?

No, I said it's not because of that.

I want to get into a panic.

Is it like the breathing, like the gasping air thing, right?

Is it that?

Yeah, a little bit.

Yeah.

I've only had like two panic attacks in my life, and that was it.

It was like the lack of breathing was the hard part for me.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, because you take those like shallow breaths.

Yeah,

oh, it sucks.

You mentioned Q, you were not feeling all that great last week.

Yeah, you know, I've been a little bit of funk lately, so uh, but uh, please, I don't want to, I don't want to talk about that now, Walt.

We got a we got a panic attack on our hands.

I think we've all been

in a bit of a

hole for like this month, yeah,

you know.

I

mean, I've, I don't even, I don't even know if I should even talk about it, but I, I was, um,

I've been in a real

rough spot for like a month,

but something happened on Saturday that like

washed it all away, but it wasn't a good thing, but like washed it all away and just kind of like made me reset.

And I wish it didn't happen but i mean i wish it had happened if it had to happen i wish it had happened like two weeks earlier but um

fuck man it was uh the worst night of my i don't want to go you know you're having a pan attack and i'm going to tell you about the worst night of my life i don't want to do that no it's okay because i need to like sort of cool out anyway so if i'm not talking and i'm just listening that's fine well hey on saturday

actually

remember when you guys called me um sunday when you guys were doing space monkeys yeah Did I sound odd?

No, I don't think so.

I didn't think so.

Did you, Walt?

I mean, did you?

I did not, my friend.

You sounded okay to me.

Did I sound okay?

Because

I had just like I had been sleeping for about 15 minutes because I had been up for like 30-some hours straight.

What had happened, I was in

Atlantic City, and

we were supposed to,

I had to come back on Saturday night rather than Sunday because we were supposed to watch my niece or Debbie's niece, which is my niece too, but it's her brother's daughter on Sunday.

And that's why I was unable to record last weekend as well as being in Atlantic City.

So we actually came home a night earlier.

And when we got home,

my youngest daughter told my wife that she was

going up to see friends who just started college up north

and she would be home at like midnight

and I don't want

I don't want to get I don't want to get upset well she was she staying overnight or she was well she wasn't supposed to stay overnight

and um

so she said she'd be home at midnight

or between 11 and midnight and um we we text her around 1130 and she's you she's

always on top of shit and never

would not answer a text, but she doesn't answer, start answering any texts.

And so by so by 12.30,

I'm more annoyed than like worried because I'm like, I can't believe that she would do this.

But then by 1.30,

it was fucking full-blown

like panic.

Like she's in a ditch.

Yeah, so we start contacting the people that she was supposed to have gone out with.

I don't even know if I should tell this, but like, it was so

brutal that, like, it just, like I said, it just kind of like washed everything away from me.

And

so we contact her friends,

and it turns out she wasn't even with the friend she was supposed to say she was with.

She lied to us and she went to a concert in New York.

Whoa, holy shit.

How old is she?

18.

Okay.

So,

so we're like,

one friend says, like, the last I heard, she was, she was going to New York and

she was going to see this concert, she said.

So the last train, so we go over to the train station and her car is there.

And

when that last train comes and she doesn't get off the train, it's like 2.30 in the morning.

I have a breakdown, man.

I mean, I went from fucking like

virtual breakdown.

My wife was the one that kept it together.

But

you thought something had happened to her.

Oh, well, yeah, because why isn't she texting us?

Why isn't she calling us?

What's going on?

Did you like,

and, but she's not on that train.

So

we call the cops because the last, we peg her phone or pinger phone, what's it called?

Ping.

Ping her phone, and it was at a train station at midnight in New York.

We're like, well, why didn't she get on the train then?

And so we call the cops in Middletown and they come over and they take a report.

I have never,

I have nothing bad.

I mean, I have nothing bad to say about the police officers, but my God, I have never dealt with such

horrible communicators and like things that were said that were, I was just, that just put me in a place that I was just like mortified.

What's it called?

They're not their bedside manner, is that what it's called?

Yeah.

Because like, you know, they said they're going to do this this stuff, and we

then they so they told us to go home,

and I'm just like, I'm a mess, a literal mess.

And they, the police show up at our house, and he said they pegged, pinged the phone,

and it's it was in Jones Beach,

and it's in the water, they told us.

That's what he said, that's what he said to me.

How can they tell that?

I don't even know.

So,

obviously you start feeling the worst.

Yeah.

So then it's like, he's like, well, the next train that comes, because the trains stop on Saturday night,

he goes, maybe she'll be on that first train back.

So we go over there and wait for the fucking train back.

And when she doesn't get off that train,

you're thinking the worst.

There is no other word.

Yeah, because why isn't she contacting us?

There's no other train.

Why isn't she contacting us?

Like, this is never happened before.

Never.

She would never do this unless she couldn't contact us.

So then

I am a fucking mess.

And my wife says,

what about your friend Troy?

Can you call him?

Maybe he could

tell us a direction to go to.

And oh my God, I can't even say enough.

And I call him about seven o'clock in the morning.

So this is seven hours of like hell

of not knowing what's going on.

And he was pretty awesome.

And he

I woke him up.

And he

told us all the right things.

Certainly didn't talk to us like the other cop did.

Like, how could the other cop say that?

Even if he knew that, why would he say that?

It's the ping is coming from in the the water.

Yeah, that's really so fucked up.

Why would you say that?

Even like,

but so he's telling me that he, he's like, I'm gonna, I live 20 minutes from Jones Beach, he said,

and I can ride over there and I'll go talk to my buddies over there.

And, um,

and, you know, I'll see if there's anything in my reports.

And he goes, you know, and he asked me all the questions.

And he says, well, did where'd she say she was going?

Did she say she was going to concert?

And he said, and I said, no, she said she was, she lied and said she was going to

see friends at a, at a, a dorm or something.

And if, like, if she was going to be late, all she would have to have done and said is like, hey, I'm going to sleep at this dorm.

We wouldn't have known.

Like, we would have been like, okay.

We wouldn't have thought anything other than like, oh, you're not in New York.

We wouldn't think like you're in New York or Jones Beach.

So for her not to even like say like an excuse was just like

it was mystifying.

It was like, there could be no other answer in my mind.

There could be no other answer if something was seriously fucking wrong.

So he was, he said, he started he gets up and he's on his way and he calls us and he tells us to start

uh getting the phone log because it's our phone so we could see the numbers that she called before that

and then um so my wife's on the phone with at t but they don't open until 9

a.m eastern it's only 7 a.m so we're like fucking again like just constantly not knowing what to do and

then she called and was like,

I had my friend contact you.

I had a friend text you and tell you that I was going to be staying over at a friend's house.

You know, she doesn't even know that we know

that she's not even there.

So it was at, she got called in that, but she said that she had someone contact us because her phone died.

And when she looked at the

phone, they were off by a digit.

They texted us that

they would be staying up there, but they texted the wrong number.

Oh, my God.

god,

it was agony

and like

all that shit that's been like fucking

gone, like washed away like it was never even there.

Wow, anything like

this superseded anything, is what you mean.

Yeah, there is nothing like that

mattered and still doesn't matter

after

you know, finding out everything was all right

wow it was i mean i'm i can't even

harrowing i can't even tell you how like gut-wrenching

oh

how punished is she what's the what's going on yeah well yeah there's a there was some punishments and but like it's hard like you know 18 years old i mean the only thing we can really do is like it's not her car

Right.

So, you know, car privileges and everything, but

well, why did she feel she had to lie?

She not alone.

Because we told her the weekend before that, like, no, we don't think it's a good idea to go to New York, to go see a concert.

You know, I just don't I'm just not comfortable with you on a train, you know, meeting somebody in New York, you know, a friend that you know that's going to a concert too, or meeting them up in North Jersey.

You know, you'll be on a train for a long time before you're you're with another person, yada yada.

How many times did I lie and go to New York, though?

You know,

when I was, you know, 18 or 17.

How many times did I not tell the truth?

I mean, she's just doing what 18-year-olds do.

But it was, oh my God.

But Troy was, I can't thank him enough for

he was so

reassuring, but you can't reassure someone, you know, fully.

But just hearing talking to him was,

he was right.

Everything that he said was on the money.

He goes, it's a good thing that she lied.

He goes, because if she told you where she was and see you didn't come home, that's that's more concerning.

He said,

oh, wow.

Yeah, well, I mean, he has a daughter that's about that age.

I think she's 18, 19.

Yeah.

And then another one coming up.

You know, she's, I think his other daughter is like 14.

How many kids do they have?

Four?

Four.

Four.

Yeah, but

I mean, yeah, I owe him.

I can't even thank him enough.

Yeah, but like I said, just like, uh, now having perspective now i know it doesn't change anything from everybody else that you know that what's been going on but boy because i can't be like oh everything's better guys

no one gives a fuck

wow

geez man that's fucking that's that was that was awful did she seem

did she seem apologetic was she apologetic oh yeah i mean it was just

you know, just

tears and

apologies, but

you just can't shake that.

Like, I feel

literally traumatized.

Like, last night I saw an accident,

and I'm like, was that her?

Because she had to take her car out to go to work, you know, because she can go to work.

And I'm like, so I'm like, dude, I feel like there's like no relaxing still.

But like, when you called, though, I had just fallen asleep, like a half hour into like that.

I like stuff.

I like, you know, the relief and oh my god, like the sleep of like angels, like, you know, the sleep of like, you were never going to have a better like lay down at like 10 a.m.

after everything had been sorted out and I knew everything was okay.

So I lay down.

You can't fall asleep immediately, but like around quarter to 11, I fall asleep and then I saw it was you.

And I know we had something going on the next day.

So I definitely wanted to take the call.

I didn't was like, oh, I'll call them back later.

So I didn't know what was going on.

If you needed something, and then when you're answering, like, hey, this is face monkeys.

And I'm just like, oh, I feel like I had to, like, I had to be like a little bit, I had to hide.

I don't know why.

I just felt like I had to just be like,

I'm surprised that no one picked up that.

Like, because me and wife was like, who are you talking to?

Like, I've never heard you talk like that.

Like, it sounded like you were a robot.

And like, your, your laugh was so fake.

Oh,

I thought it was more like, I thought it was more like, I can't believe these guys are bothering me.

No, no, it was more just like, I didn't even know how to react.

It was just kind of like I was bamboozled.

And then, you know, because I had just fallen asleep.

And then you called.

And it was,

yeah, I was trying to act as if nothing was wrong.

And I felt like it was so apparent that something was wrong.

I didn't get that.

Did you, Q?

No, not at all.

Oh, okay.

Quite the opposite.

I thought

you put on a good show, my friend.

Okay, yeah.

So, wait, let me get the timeline down.

So you, this is post-Atlantic City.

Yeah, we had gotten home late Saturday night because we wanted to come do the thing with our niece.

Right, okay.

So we get home and you know, kind of like not late, 9:30.

We see that, you know, that, you know, she is, she's still not home, but we know that she, where she's going, supposedly, you know, and it didn't turn out that way, though.

Christ almost.

Oh, my God, dude.

Oh,

there, like,

nothing could,

like you said, supersede it.

Is that the word?

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's fucking.

But like, I feel, but also, like,

I know it doesn't sound like it,

but the happiness and joy.

When you hear her voice, like when the phone rings up and it's her number.

Oh, it's like, it's like

zero to 100, you know, like complete and utter

dismay to like

unbridled joy.

And I still feel it, though.

She stayed in, she slept in Manhattan.

No, she actually went to her friends up in North Jersey.

They took the train back at midnight, but went to their friends in North Jersey, but didn't, but texted, because her phone died, and texted and said that they were going to be sleeping up there

and staying the night.

And, you know, I don't even know.

You know what?

At a certain point, I was just like, I couldn't hear anything.

Sure.

You know,

she shows a text, a screenshot from her friend, and it says it looks like it's off by a number.

And

she texted the wrong number instead of texting my wife.

Right.

She texted somebody else.

And,

you know, I mean,

I don't even know, but it didn't matter.

It didn't matter.

It didn't matter, man.

It just didn't matter.

And like, yeah, and I said, like, it doesn't sound like it, but

like, there, like, nothing matters at this point.

Now, it's just, like, just joy

because there's a lot of parents, I mean, not a lot, but there are parents who, like, dude, what about that fucking story?

What about that story in

Moab?

Moab.

Oh, oh, with the girl who went missing, right?

And they just found her recently.

Yeah, they found her the day that, like, that Alicia went, that Alicia went missing.

They found her.

That's a fucked up story.

It's another one where

people get upset because it's like the white woman syndrome, they call it, because it's like there's so many people go missing, but every time there's a big story about it, it seems to be like a white girl with blonde hair.

Yeah, well, I mean,

but the media like calling out the media is weird, though.

It's like, you're the media.

You carry these stories.

You choose whether to carry them or not.

Like, why are you blaming the public for

not caring, but you didn't bring the story to the public's attention?

You dropped the ball.

Oh, yeah.

Right?

I mean, it feels like there is kind of a like people only,

you know, society only cares when these people go missing.

Well, society's only hip to it when the media brings the story or

champions the story.

You're like, how are we supposed to know?

Exactly.

Until they went missing.

Until like this, the media picks it up and runs with it.

Oh,

like the hell that, like, seven hours of pure hell is, I can't even imagine what the, what, the hell that I can't,

it's got to be on a level that can't be, like, can only be measured by

saints or demons, the uh, the amount of grueling.

And as you're going

as you're going through that, she's fucking snoring away up in North Jersey.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, like you had no idea, it wasn't even aware that, like, you know, like, that we're at a train station

for hours waiting on every train.

And when that train pulls up and she's not on it,

oh, yeah.

These people get off, you know, at like at seven o'clock, at eight o'clock.

And then finally at 8:30, we get a call.

Did you do that thing that they do in movies all the time where like you saw someone that looks like her from behind and you rushed up to her and grabbed her and spun her around?

Well, when the person got off the train, it was like some little skinny girl, like skinny lady, not a girl, but a lady.

So my heart, like, I was hopeful because I seen these skinny legs get off yeah you know what but you know you're not Alicia you stupid bitch just hope's dash though

oh gosh though but

that sounds worse than a panic attack I gotta say I know yeah not to yeah don't not you have to I'm not telling you I'm not just this motherfucker diminishing any of you because I I feel like I feel bad that you're like having panic attacks especially if you have no rhyme or reason yeah I don't know what it is I don't know why it happens it happens to a lot of people though yeah I hear about them, you know.

And you're not

prescribed anything to help?

Well, I could take Xanax if I want, but I don't like Xanax because it just makes me tired.

But is it better to be tired?

Sometimes I'll take like half of one, and that'll knock it out.

But like, if it's when it starts, it's like by the time I take the Xanax, it's like by the time the Xanax kicks in, the panic attack is subsiding already.

So

it's kind of useless for that.

I think anyway.

God, I'm glad to come that she's okay.

Is your favorite?

Yeah, yeah.

I feel fine now.

Yeah, my shirt is still fucking soaked with sweat, but

I feel all right.

I feel fine.

Good.

That is, I'm sorry that happened to you, man.

That's

my fault.

Like, my stomach hurts thinking about you feeling that bad.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But, like you said, it's perspective.

I realize that it's only perspective for myself.

Well, you know what, bud?

It reminds me of when I had my brain issues and

there were times where I was like, I'm not going to make it through this.

It's going to kill me.

It's going to impair me.

And I remember after that, things have changed.

But that does, it does go away.

You know what I mean?

And it's like, it's easy for me to remember it because I went through it.

But like that sunny optimism that I had after it, where I was like, I don't give a fuck what happens right now.

I'm okay.

I'm alive.

I didn't think I would be for a fucking brief minute there.

That's like you said, like I'm four days removed and it's so raw still.

Yeah.

You can't stop thinking about it.

I'm sure that will diminish as well.

Oh, for sure.

For sure.

But boy, it's a good feeling right now, though.

But I'm still sorry to hear that you guys are not feeling well.

Nah, that's all right.

Now, what kind of phone?

Does she have an Android or iPhone?

iPhone.

And there's nobody with a fucking iPhone cord around?

Well, that's the thing that, you know, when me and my wife, then, like, we can't stop talking about it just to ourselves, though you know like the uh and we're like this don't make sense this don't make sense and and you're just like

just let's stop like let's just stop and just breathe and and just realize that our the nightmare is over you know and just yeah just let it go let go of that stress and anxiety and we have

almost almost obviously still there's still some there some residual oh yeah yeah but it's like i said though i'm it it you can't hear it in me, but

yeah, like I could get spit on by some stranger like right now, and I'd be like, it's raining, it's raining sunshine,

and it could be like, well, I also have,

I also have COVID, I was gonna say

HIV,

wow, right,

I still would be like, oh, well, I, you know, what's a little bit of sniffles, I can deal with COVID now.

Yeah, just pop yourself in a ventilator.

You'll be all right.

You'll be fine.

Yeah, it's funny.

Something I told you, Walter, I don't think I told you, Q.

Normally I get up, I make Sage her breakfast for school, before school, and

then I get her on the bus.

So

one, and I always wake up first.

So like I wake up first, I wake up Sage, and then Mary Beth sleeps in.

But then one morning, Mary Beth wakes me up because I had slept a little bit later, and and she's like, Sage isn't in the house.

And I was like, Oh, yeah.

Did I tell you this?

I think it's

a good thing.

I think you'd go.

She walked to school.

Yeah.

She got herself dressed, got her backpack, walked to school across two, like one major road, one

kind of major road.

And

I didn't know where the fuck she went.

Like, Mary Beth was like, well, she doesn't have her backpack's missing.

So that's why we assumed she went to to school and we drove over by the school and there she is.

Like, it's seven in the morning, though.

Like, her school doesn't start until eight, so there's nobody there.

We see her looking in the window and shit, kind of like, what the fuck?

Like, where is everybody?

Like, the relief, though.

Can you describe it?

It's just like everything leaves your body.

Like, yeah, all that, all that stress and that anxiety, like, that, that has been building like in a very short amount of time, too.

Yeah.

How long did you, how long was she gone for in your head?

How long did you, were you aware that she was gone?

Probably 10 minutes, maybe.

Oh, so 10 minutes of.

Yeah, okay.

Ten minutes of that.

That's thank God.

You know what?

If you had to do it, it's 10 minutes.

It's brutal.

10 minutes, though, you know, thank God you didn't have to do it for seven hours.

And with every twist and turn going the wrong way, too.

That was the thing about it.

Until she called, you were getting nothing but bad news.

Yeah, right.

All her friends are telling me, you know, different things.

And finally, someone says, you know, she said she was going to a concert.

And then we go over and find the car.

And when we find the car, we know that that friend was telling us the truth.

What band do you remember?

She only listens to bands that like two people have heard of.

Still, she's always the same fucking M.O., I'm just like, What about Beyoncé, where you can go to a concert where there's fucking 50,000 people?

So like where it's not just a bunch of fucking guys sitting in the corner or like weirdos, like three of them and you.

You know, it's just like, like, why can't we just go see or go see like mainstream bands and mainstream fucking venues rather than somebody in an attic?

Alice Cooper.

How about Alice Cooper?

He's spooky.

I love him.

They have like these illegal lofts and shit, like these weird places where people go and see them.

Well, yeah, I mean, Alicia's definitely like, she strikes me as sort of like alternative.

Oh, yeah.

She is not mainstream.

Exactly.

And she thinks that she is,

she knows everything and she wants to be independent.

And, you know, she's not like her sister who is not like that.

So my oldest one never did anything like this.

She went to see Beyonce.

But she, you know, she, she never did anything like this to us.

So this is our first experience with like something like that.

And

my wife handled it extremely well.

She very, you know, obviously

distraught, but

yeah, don't come to me in a, in a moment of crisis.

I thought I would be good in a crisis, but it depends on the crisis, though.

I found out.

It really depends on, like, like when the house got with Sandy,

I was like a rock.

He was like, we'll get it done.

No big deal.

You know, it's, it's,

it's, it's fucking sheetrock and glue and some nails, and we'll be, we'll be back, and no big deal.

And other people I know were very

distraught, and you know, rightfully so.

I mean,

you're out of house, but I thought like I was like a rock.

I was like, you know, nothing could get, you know, make me shatter, but I was wrong.

Oh,

that's your fucking daughter, man.

Yeah.

But you got to hold it together, though, to make sure.

Like, I see these guys on TV, you know, and they're.

Oh, like Liam Neeson and like taken.

Immediately, he's on the case before she's even kidnapped.

Like, yeah, they're slicing people's throats for answers.

And I'm in a feel position, you know, crying and just like, like, like, I don't even know what to do.

And it's just like, oh,

yeah.

Like, I think, I think in the third Taken movie, he drove a car into an airplane to stop it from taking off.

Oh, my God.

You know, I've never seen those movies, but I swear to God,

she was working at Michael's recently.

She's still working there.

But her second or third night at Michaels, I was supposed to go pick her up at like 9.30 because the store closes at 9 and like they have to put back shit on the shelves and they release them workers at 9.30, but the doors are locked.

So I'm sitting out in the parking lot and

10 o'clock rolls around and she's not answering the text.

And so I go to the door and I'm like,

there's nobody in the building, but I know that I'm supposed to pick her up at 9.30.

So I texted my wife and I'm like, what do I do here?

Like, what do I do?

She hasn't come out of Michael's.

Like, what if she's in trouble in Michaels?

What if she's, someone's, what if something's bad is going on in Michaels right now?

And I said, what, like, I said, should I just get in the Prius and go right through the front door?

I said, I was here.

And I know it sounds like I was fucking around, but I was like, it was like, it crossed my mind.

And my wife was like, what?

I go, oh, I mean, I don't know how else to get in.

I go, I'm banging on the door.

I said, I go, I could take the Prius right through it.

I go, I don't know how much it'll cost us, but what if I'm right?

What if something's going on?

I said.

It wouldn't be the first time in history that somebody has gone into a store and corralled people into a break room or something and held them at gunpoint.

It's happened.

And so

I know, I swear on my mother's life,

if my wife was like, go ahead, do it.

I don't even know how fast I would have to go to break those doors down.

Like, I don't know how, like, I don't want to injure myself too.

So in case I got to jump out of the the car and do something, so how fast should I go to break down the doors?

I don't even know.

Like, should I do it at five miles per hour and just bump into them?

Bump into it, just slowly go.

So, so, what happened was, I took my foot and I just started banging on the metal part of the door so loud,

so loud that all of a sudden, some bewildered woman comes running around the corner and sees me banging on the door.

And like, and she stops, and I'm making, and I see eye contact with her.

So I am like, I forward her to be like, Come here, come here.

And I'm like, and I'm like, is I scream and she can't barely hear me because she's really far away.

And then I see Alicia pop her head off from around the corner.

I can hear her mouth.

That's my dad.

And she comes up and says, What are you doing?

And I'm like, What do you mean?

What am I doing?

You said pick you up at 9:30.

She goes, I know.

We had a lot of work to do.

She goes, I'm not done yet.

I was like, all right, I'll go wait in the car.

The only way this story is better.

The only way this story is better is if you did drive the Prius through the fucking front of the store.

And then they come out and she's like, what are you doing?

I mean, it's not taking out a plane from taking off, but I contemplated it for a second.

And if my wife had said, like, if she was as,

I don't want to say, I don't know what the word is, like,

weak,

unstable as I was, and she was like, you better do it.

I was like, all right.

And I would have tried to fucking put my Prius through the front doors.

Oh, wow.

The Asbury Park Press is like local celebrity loses his shit.

Oh, yeah.

Wow.

Q you nailed it with the word harrowing.

Yeah.

That's what it sounds like.

Yeah.

It's uh it's it well, like I knew that she was okay because one, we're doing the podcast

and I'm I'm positive I would have heard about it if if if she wasn't but like even even knowing that

the pure emotion in your voice was so scary.

Like, I had to, like, I really lost it

at 6:30 when I knew I would have to call my mother

and tell her this news.

That's

like have to call my mom and say her granddaughter is missing.

How low on the list of people to call and inform is Gidam?

You know, he's not as low because

I know that, like, if I was like, dude, I need you to go here or I need you to go to Jones Beach, he would do it.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking, actually.

Yeah, but there was like, I don't, I didn't, I didn't know what to do or who to tell.

There was like nobody like

Troy.

I didn't even think about Troy until like early in the morning.

And, but, like, you know, what are they, like,

amazing, though?

I, I, I can't say enough.

That is good to hear, man.

That is good.

Because I know I woke him up, and his, like, his shock,

you know, to hear me at seven o'clock in the morning on a seven-year-old, he's like, somebody's dead.

Johnson finally killed himself.

Yeah, I

wouldn't put it, you know, what?

I guarantee you that had to be like that millisecond thought in his head, like, something bad must have happened to Boy.

There's no fucking way he's calling me at seven in the morning for any other reason.

Yeah.

Hey, Troy, what's up?

Why the fuck did the guy tell you that the phone was in the water?

I don't even know.

Like, this cop was the absolute worst.

He was like, he said as he left our house, too, he goes, yeah, we're, yeah, we, we're definitely, we're going to, we'll hope to find her.

We're going to try to find her.

No, no, no, we'll definitely find her.

He goes, that's what he said.

He also said at one point, because she got her friend in trouble, because her friend wasn't where she was supposed to be

that

um her friend her mother of her like my daughter's friend they went to her mother's house and the mother said that she was babysitting somewhere so i said well did you go to that house i said to see if that to talk to the daughter she may know where my daughter is and you're like yeah we should go to that baby to where they said the babysitter is right he said that to me that's what he said to me right he goes right and i go yeah i go and i go yeah we'll have to go back there and find out where the where she's supposed to be babysitting babysitting.

Oh, my God.

It's funny because, you know, from the cops' perspective, they're like, she's fucking 18.

She's out.

The phone died.

Some stupid shit.

We've seen this fucking every weekend since I've been on this job.

And they can't even muster professionalism anymore to let you to like, cause, because, like, if he said to you, look, Mr.

Flanagan, I know you're getting crazy and upset, but like, I'm fucking telling you, she's at a friend's house.

The phone died or some stupid shit like this.

He said it.

He said that.

And of course, that didn't mean anything.

Like,

you're wrong.

This is not my Alicia.

She wouldn't do this.

She would never allow us to go through this for seven hours.

Like, you're wrong, asshole.

I wanted to grab by his gun and be like, come on, and put it to his head and be like, shut the fuck up and do something.

Debbie's like, do it.

Do it.

Drive your Prius through the police station.

No, they came to us and they came to us.

And like, and when you see them pull up to your house, you don't know what to think, you know, because they pull, like, we, we contacted them real late on a Saturday, Sunday morning, and then two hours later, they pull up to the house because they have paperwork to have us fill out.

You know, and I should, and I don't want to say just some of the things he said, I wish he didn't say, but I will say they definitely were on it.

Absolutely.

And I may be making light now of the things that, like, I don't want to paint a picture that, like, they, but you're right, QA.

They, like, they told me that, and they were right.

And I'm sure 99.9% of the time they are right.

Yeah, but there's that 0.1% time.

You know, and you'll never be able to console a parent

with like saying it's most likely this.

But,

you know, but he was right, though.

And I mean, every second that ticks by, it's like.

That Gabby Fetito, it's like the same thing for those parents.

They're like, they're just hoping that they hear, hoping that they hear.

Oh, yeah.

Now it's seven hours.

Now it's 10 hours.

Now it's 24 hours.

You know?

And time goes like in this instance,

I've never felt time move quicker in my life.

It felt like, you know, like the flash moving through time.

Like you look at the clock one instant, it's one.

You look at the next

time, it's 1:30, but you feel like you just looked at it two seconds ago.

So every time you look at the clock, it's another half hour, but it moved

like I've never felt time move in my life.

Jesus.

It didn't like stand still.

It wasn't dragging.

It was like, it was super sped up, it felt like.

Yeah, I would have thought the opposite.

Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, you would think maybe, but yeah, it was exactly just

like it was 7 a.m.

before you even knew it.

Well, I'm glad it worked out.

Yeah, oh my gosh, yeah.

That's why there is no more, yeah, there's no

more mountains.

Like, yeah, anything I'm dealing with now is fucking a cakewalk.

It's nothing.

Fucking cake walk.

I've walked in the park.

A little fucking Enterman's cake over there.

Look at it go.

Well, instead of going to concerts now that she's punished, maybe she can use her Raycons to listen to this music.

Damn straight.

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How come there is so much bass in hip-hop?

I think it's just dance to it.

Oh, okay.

I never that I guess that shows how white I am.

Why are they so bass-heavy?

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Yeah, it is.

It's interesting that

you bring up perspective, like how

shit just suddenly changes.

Like the stuff that you thought was so fucking important, the stuff that you're like, what?

Nobody else deals with this kind of crap.

Then you get something that really means something.

And yeah.

You know, pettiness and

bullshit and

just

holding on to things.

It's just

unimportant.

It is, but you know,

it is.

And it is.

And just, you know, when you find that perspective, you know, I don't know,

it doesn't automatically change that things were

never quite right before, but

it almost makes it impossible to go back to that mindset.

You know what I mean?

You think you don't think in time levels?

Yeah, you can't feel.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

In one way, I hope

anxiety of like, you know, if when like she was,

I saw that accent, I texted my wife and I was like, she's home from work yet?

And she was like, not yet.

And I was like, text her.

You know, and then she, you know, came home, like, she was like 10 minutes late from work.

You know, that, I hope that goes away because

that's not a healthy existence either.

But the kind of like,

you know, brayer rabbit, well, not bray rabbit, what's it called?

When your nothing sticks to you?

Teflon rabbit?

I don't know.

But like, you know, I hope that can stay for a super long time because

it is nice

to not give a fuck about some of the shit that would probably have been like sent me into like a fucking like

not a rage, but like where I would be like, What the fuck?

Like traffic, even, you know, like I could sit in traffic now till fucking doomsday.

I wouldn't give a fuck.

I don't care if I move an inch, you know.

Good God.

Geez.

Well, I'm glad she's all right.

Thank you.

That is very good to see you guys.

We got a big announcement.

Oh, yeah.

I think you should deliver it, man.

Me?

Yeah, well, you found the place.

Okay.

So, I mean, it's, I don't know, I guess it's kind of good news, bad news?

A little bit of both.

A little both of them.

Right?

I mean, a little melancholy.

On October 1st,

the TSD Town General General Store in Red Bank.

Well, actually, I guess the last day in September, because

we will no longer be there in October because

we're shuttering the general store in Red Bank

solely because

it's just too tiny a spot.

It's just been so hard to get some of the videos that we want to get.

And

we just kind of outgrew it.

And we needed to find a bit bigger place.

And we found a bigger place in Hazlitt, New Jersey, exit 117, Route 36, at the airport plaza.

Very accessible.

Yeah, right.

Very accessible to anybody

who's coming to Jersey and wants to see the general store.

We aren't going to be calling it the general store.

We're going to be calling it the TSD Town

Studio.

But the general store will be inside the studios, kind of like a real secret stash as a

secret store inside the office.

I thought we could

alert ants that if they want to come see the store, we're going to be open probably the same hours as the other store, but maybe they can have a secret knock to let us know that ants are at the door, something like that.

Oh, that's cool.

That's a pretty simple one, right?

I mean, that's the most go-to secret knock ever.

What was it again?

Can you do it?

Can you replicate that front?

Shaving a haircut two bits.

There you go.

Shaving a haircut, two bits.

Well, no, there's an an at the door.

Or just a wise-ass FedEx guy.

Yeah, we're hoping,

I don't know if we'll be open October 1st, though, but we're hoping pretty soon we, I mean, dude, talk about like having that new perspective, dealing with the

bureaucracy.

How do you say that, Brian?

Bureaucracy.

Of fucking opening up a business in a new town.

Oh, my God, the amount of paperwork you got to fill out, the amount of hoops you got to jump through.

Me and Walt were talking.

It's like, this is so simple.

We don't have to get a business license.

We don't have to do anything.

We were wrong.

Yeah.

Yeah, he stopped by the other day.

He's like, you know, I go there.

They're like, hey, it's open at 3:30.

I go there.

The lady's not there.

You got to come back the next day.

It's all that bullshit.

And so much forms you got to fill out.

And

every time you go with your form that you think you filled out properly,

no, it's not filled out properly.

You missed this information.

You missed this.

And then I'm like, well, how do I know that information?

And they look at you like,

like, how could you not know?

But I'm like, this is information that, like, I am not used to having to know.

But again, no, like, didn't matter.

I'll get it done.

Yeah.

It'll all get done.

And the general, the studios and with the general store inside of it will be

kick-ass and it'll be a new yeah, we're gonna make we're gonna make like a dedicated recording like area, right?

Like

we have a little room that's with like a really sweet big room where the cameras can be pulled back.

We have a lot of space now, and we're not only going to be on top of each other.

It's devoted just to recording, audio, and video, and the general store being the when you open the door, when you first walk in, and it's going to be nice, it's going to be dope.

Gonna paint that wall green.

Yeah,

you need a permit for that, Bri.

We do, can I?

Yeah, so I said, fuck it.

I'm just going to put the felt up.

But how would they ever know?

Paint the wall green.

What was that?

How would they know if you were?

I was only teasing.

Yeah, well, we could paint it.

Got it.

It wouldn't be surprising, though, because every township wants to.

I mean, their hand is in your pocket for every little fucking thing.

Lord,

I don't know how people do it.

Like, this is my first experience with it, but like, you are like, everybody's got their hand out at every desk at the borough municipality.

Yeah.

And they actually told me

when I had the wrong information, when I was to come back the next day, don't forget your checkbook.

They were laughing like that happened.

I mean,

thank God I'm in a great mood because I would have told you, like, why is that funny?

You're like, you're lucky my daughter's okay.

Yeah.

Wow.

I mean, it was, you know, the real, kind of like

when the stash closed and moved to the new location, it was really kind of like

that was really kind of like the time that I felt we were separating from an era.

Yeah, yeah,

it was a little bit of a separation.

Yeah, like here, I don't really have that.

I'm like, I never really connected with the new store because of COVID.

We, you know, we didn't, we didn't, I didn't record there as much.

I didn't come down as much, but uh,

but but uh, yeah, it's a little bit shorter trip for you, not much, but maybe

at least 20 minutes,

so 40 minutes each way.

Fuck yeah, dude, absolutely.

That's huge, and plus that red bank traffic that builds up like around that time.

And the parking lot at the airport plaza is fucking massive.

I mean, you could park a fleet of fucking planes there.

That's why it used to be an airport, hence Airport Plaza.

Or Plaza.

In the 20s.

And

we'll have to do some research on that.

That used to be where the big roller skating rink was when we were kids.

Oh, yeah?

There's a photo of like an aerial of the place in the 20s, and there was planes on there.

Planes like, you know, Emil Earhart would try to get them.

Right, little ones, yeah.

Yeah, not like jet liners, but yeah, that's why it was called Airport Plaza.

It used to be an airport.

I didn't know that.

I was such an asshole.

I never even thought, like,

I wonder why they call it Airport Plaza.

Well, to be fair, and I don't want to sound like Giddam here, but like, I know everything.

I saw the picture on Hanging on the Wall, so that's how I know.

Years ago, I saw the picture.

That's how I know why it was called Airport Plaza.

I would assume that there was a, you got the bus there to go to Newark.

That's how I thought it was called the Airport Plaza, but I was wrong as well.

There's a KFC right there.

Walt's concerned he's going to eat too many potatoes.

Oh, yeah, I'm going to have fucking love handles big time.

I love their potatoes, and I feel like I'm going to have potato thighs

in a year.

We're there for a year, see how it works out.

But in that year, though, like, yeah, I could have like, I could look drastically different in a year, though, with all the potatoes I'm going to pack on.

Pounds of you enough potatoes.

No, you and get him to keep walking, baby.

Yeah, yeah, we're going to have to keep up the walking to offset that potato

supply that's right outside my door.

We were moving some stuff in the other night, and I could smell the potatoes from the fucking office.

And I'm just like, motherfucker, I'm not gonna be able to not with, with, resist not going to get potatoes.

Yeah, I told Mary Beth that, you know, about the potato thing, and she was like, I don't know.

I mean, how much longer do you think the KFC will be there?

I was like, You fucking kidding me?

That's been ever since we were before we were born.

Yeah, we were.

I was like, as long as I can remember, it's been there for fucking over 50 years.

I don't think it was going anywhere.

Show the Colonel some fucking respect.

Even with Popeyes and Chick-fil-A around, it still

does well.

Oh, you know what, though?

She's right, though, man.

The Colonel just got some massive fucking competition, though, with Chick-fil-A opening up and Popeyes within the last year.

Yeah, Popeyes is like a mile away.

No, it's you could throw it, you can hit it with a fucking rock.

Is it even closer?

Oh, it's like a quarter of a mile away, really?

Yeah, damn.

Chick-fil-A as well.

It's on the other highway, but it's still only like a two-second ride from the complex.

Yeah, that's not bad either.

Yeah, but we're hoping we're going to do some

maybe a big Black Friday event

at the general store.

Got some merch, some exclusive merch that we'll put out on Black Friday.

And won't announce it yet just in case it doesn't get here in time, but it should be here on time.

Oh, we should get a t-shirt made.

You know how, like, you go to Sun Studios and they sell you t-shirts of the Sun Studio logo and shit like that?

We should get Tele Steve Dave Studio shirts made up, man.

I'd wear one of those.

Awesome.

The only thing I was thinking the same thing, but I guess we need a different logo because our three heads is the general store sign.

You know, the three heads.

And that looks so similar to our other three-headed uh shirt right so yeah we need a like maybe we'll put it out here maybe so like a little contest for uh for some artistic aunts who want to design a tell him steve date studio uh shirt yeah think like old hollywood like something cool you know and what's the shirt that you're you're you want them to look at as an inspiration what's the shirt you said sunset uh oh sun studios like when you go there to in in memphis that you could take the tour and they have a studio you know they have a t-shirt with the logo of holy fuck we could give tours.

Yeah, we could give tours.

Get him could be a tour guide.

Absolutely.

He could have a tip jar, you know, so everybody kind of fucking tips him at the end.

Yes, we will give tours, people.

What a great idea.

And like Gidem, like Giddam texted me almost immediately.

Fantasies is almost directly across the street.

That's right.

There's a TNA bar across the street.

Yeah.

What do you get to need?

KFC and Titties.

The Colonel and Titties.

And bowling.

And bowling, and there's a Perkins there.

There's a pizza parlor there.

Yeah, so we're hoping that

we realize, though, that not having it at the stash is going to really

cut down on foot traffic.

Because it's not a storefront.

It's an office inside this

strip plaza.

Yeah.

So

it's not like you can see it from the street or anything.

But we're going to have a sign.

I'm in the process of getting the sign.

And it's going to be a pretty large sign amongst the

suites because

you don't get on the big billboard that's on the highway because you've got to be a storefront to get that.

But we will have a sign there hopefully soon.

And, you know, if you guys are any ants are in Jersey and

you have a car and you visit the Stash, maybe you can make the trip north of the Stash and hit us up in Hazlitt, Airport Plaza.

We'll give the exact address when we're open.

Oh, it's awesome, man.

Remember that knock.

Yeah, but it's exciting, right?

It's definitely a brand new chapter.

Yeah, are we going to get a bigger TV for this place now, right?

Finally, we're going to get a TV because we can't even take that little TV because it wasn't ours.

We're definitely getting a TV, a big one.

Well, hey, if you don't care about 4K, I have an extra

55-inch.

Is it smart?

Could it have a fire stick?

Yeah, for sure.

Then yes, let's take it.

Yes, we will take it.

Frank Five is donating a printer.

You're donating a TV.

Yeah.

My wife donated a microwave.

Look at us, man.

Look at us.

It's like an upstart business, baby.

I'm donating the burrow couch.

That's right.

The burrow couch that cost us so much

problems with burrow when we compared Bezos to Hitler.

they still gave us a couch

and Emperor I is donating that couch.

Oh, awesome.

So like this is like almost like we're newly married.

It's all coming together, man.

Yeah, like gonna take the world by storm at as at 55.

Shit, man, this is exciting.

I can't wait to see it.

I uh I can only imagine, Walt, that

with this thing with Alicia, that your Miundis

probably had a little stain in them.

You might need some new ones.

You know what?

I will cop to

being a basket case,

but I will say, I don't know if there's anything that could make me shit my pants because I thought that would be it.

And it wasn't not even close.

Not even close.

Like,

that was never going to happen.

Yeah, that's not really a normal reaction to being nervous, I think, right?

I thought it was scared, right?

Like,

have you ever known anybody that ever was like, I was so scared I really shit?

Like, or is that just like some old wives tale that that happened?

Well, I think.

I don't know.

What do you think, Giddam?

You ever shit your pants?

Oh, yeah.

What?

Because you were scared?

Yeah.

Of what?

What were you scared of?

I don't remember exactly, but like, it was like a little teeny one.

Oh, just a little.

When you were a kid?

Yeah.

It's a defense mechanism.

Oh, okay.

But you were a bad letter, letter though you your body

eliminates all extra weight so you could run faster is what's behind it really that's why people piss their pants and shit themselves because your body's like dump everything and fucking move oh so it's not that you're scared it's a natural reaction well it is you're scared but yeah so cavemen when they saw a tyrannosaurus rex or something will walk up on them sure they would shit and run shit their loincloth yeah

yeah that's why they didn't have me on these back then so we probably over the course of time, as we evolved from cavemen to Homo sapiens,

we stopped doing that.

We didn't need to do it anymore because

we probably aren't that scared of anything on that kind of level anymore as dinosaurs and shit.

Yeah, you don't fear for your life on a daily basis.

Yeah, we kind of lost

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Raycon is starting to turn into that kind of loyal sponsor.

But yeah, Miyundis has been there for...

Myundis is the shit, man.

Yeah, we have a lot to think.

Without Miyundis, we probably wouldn't be able to make this move that we're contemplating right now that we're attempting.

It's true.

It should be Miyundi's studios.

You know,

how they have corporate names, like for they have to pay a certain fee, like at Font Stadium.

So I could, we're going to assume that

we're hiring Gedham to work it, I guess.

I would like to.

I wanted to bounce that off you.

I mean, we're going to need an employee.

Oh, let's do it on the air.

I like this.

We're going to need somebody there, you know, like

to do things.

He's handy.

He's smart.

Does he have a resume

I can look at?

Do you think we should interview different candidates?

Yeah, just to just to he can't hear us, right?

I mean, maybe just to make him sweat a bit.

He can't hear you, but he can hear us.

Okay, yeah, maybe to make him sweat a little little bit i don't know do you think he honestly wouldn't carry the way

uh nah we gotta hire giddham's the no-brainer hire yeah

gotta hire him he's already um you know has ideas about you know like the handyman stuff that like i'm not good at i don't think that you're much of a handy mania i want to speak for you go ahead you can speak for me

but any but get him has some good ideas and some you know some cost-saving things that he's he's suggesting and i'm like yeah man go for it do what you do your shit do your thing

and we will like hopefully you know as soon as possible we'll be up and running and you know sometime in october and we can start letting people come in

but i think we could go there and record now i think that we're we're in they're allowing us to move our stuff in oh fucking cool man let's do it

Do we got to soundproof a room or we got to turn something into, are we going to try and make the acoustics a little better or no?

Well, I guess we have to hear what it sounds like.

I don't think it's going to be bad because

it's like a conference room.

So it should be pretty good.

It's a conference room, and yeah, the ceiling tiles are that like that drop ceiling stuff.

Oh, like that sounds good.

We'll bounce off that.

And the walls are far enough away that I don't think we'll get a lot of like.

Yeah, we got some room.

It's spacey.

Nice.

And I thought we could put the,

like, adhere the poker table to the wall because we're going to need a bigger tables.

But I think

the poker table mounted on the wall.

Nice little, like, you know, we can look over at it for inspiration and all those years, you know, spent at the stash and everything.

I love it, man.

That's cool.

Yeah, dedicated table.

So we.

Something's going on.

Something going on with your mic?

One, two, one, two.

Oh, okay.

Maybe just turned away.

Yeah.

Yeah, but you're hearing it in this mic anyway.

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Like now that we have a dedicated table, we can set up the board and the mics and we don't have to break it down every fucking time.

Oh, that'd be nice.

Just leave it there.

Yeah, I mean, like, it's pretty cool.

It's sad, though, because I mean,

it'll be the first time in 20 years I won't be going to Red Bank every day.

Like, every day was like my commute was to Red Bank for 22 years.

So that is, that's, you know, I will, there will be a tug at my heart, and, you know, you know, not going into the stash.

Obviously, I'll, I mean, I'll be going back into the stash, but not on a regular basis.

That tug will

probably wane when you realize it's like, holy shit, it was fucking 20 minutes to get to Red Bank, fucking three minutes to get to this place.

Fuck Red Bank.

Well, I mean, if I, you know, and I hopefully I won't drown my sorrows by, you know, by missing the stash in mashed potatoes.

Yeah, it's like I haven't considered that yet.

Like, I've been going to Red Bank since I was 19 on a regular basis.

And, like,

you're right.

It definitely will go again.

The stash is still there.

Yeah, absolutely.

I'll be going there and then seeing everybody.

But that day-to-day

that I was doing for 22 years ends on September 30th.

I don't know how many days are in September, 30 or 31?

30.

So on September 30th,

I won't have to go to Red Bank for the first time in 22 years, and that's weird.

I mean, it is.

It's like almost half your life.

Fuck, I didn't even think about that.

Yeah, half my life.

Well, now the next half, hopefully, it's just all mashed potatoes and

Hazlitt, Perkins, and

everything.

Knowing where everybody in your family is when they say coming there.

Hopefully, it's all that.

Well, as you get older, too, you realize like time's ticking.

So, do you want to spend all that time on a commute back and forth?

Now, the commute's much shorter.

Compared to

the Red Bank commute, as if that's a commute.

It's a little bit of a commute.

For Q, yeah, but for me, you, I mean, but I only got to do it once a week.

You were doing it every day.

Yeah.

But oh, man, so many awesome memories, though.

Uh,

for me alone, you know, not with not even counting Telmstee, Dave, at the stash.

You know, it's, it's, it's, it's sad, you know, that, but it's, you know, it was just time.

I mean, what are we going to do?

There just wasn't wasn't enough space, you know?

Right.

And, you know, they, they, you know, and everything's running awesome there.

Everything's under control.

I mean, they, it just was, you know, it's the new Stash chapter and it's the new TSD chapter.

Deal with it.

But all the Talm Steve Dave memories there, oh, my God.

But we'll pay homage to it.

You know, the poker table will go up.

There'll be other things that, you know, that happened at Stash on display at the new store.

yeah, I could finally build that altar to the kissing skull, the kissing devil skull that I wanted.

Remember, I want to do candles around it and stuff like that.

Absolutely.

Oh, very nice.

There's nothing that, yeah, we have so much room though.

Yeah.

Okay.

Are there any windows in this office?

No.

It's rather windowless.

It's much like the previous general store, as that there's no windows.

I got used to that, though.

It's like a casino.

You never know what time it is.

It's fucking funny.

We don't have any windows.

I love it.

Yeah, it's comfortable in a way, though.

It's just like then it's an insulated world.

You know, you don't have to look out the window.

You don't have to look out the window and see KFC all the time.

We do have a communal bathroom, though.

Q.

I don't know.

I know that you are a bit of a

little worried about germs.

Like, if you have to use the bowl, I would suggest using it before you leave.

Just pop into fantasies and drop things.

You think that one's cleaner?

There was one when Walt and I looked at a different office.

It had its own bathroom, like within the office.

Yeah.

And we were like, yeah, but that means somebody has to clean it.

So fuck it.

We decided to opt out of having our own bathroom because nobody wanted to clean it.

Well, isn't that what our fucking employee is for?

I don't want to make that do that to get him no making.

You know, my friend be like,

go clean the bowl.

I just shit it.

I just blew it up.

That's not what you do to a friend.

But you had all those people send pictures of shit to me.

Yeah, but it was virtual.

There's something different when you're fucking right on top of it and you can smell it.

When it's I-R-L.

I-R-L.

And it's too real.

I mean, it is real.

It's too real.

And it fucking is real.

Yeah, no.

But I actually went into the bathroom and we may have made a...

That's our first misstep, I think.

We fucked up?

We fucked up because

it is a fucking wreck in there.

Yeah.

Somebody left it like in a state of where it wouldn't have made the cut for the not-so-Super Bowl.

It wasn't that bad, but it was like if somebody had more time, it may have, though, because

it was pretty fucking like,

who leaves a stall like this?

They're committing a crime, practically.

That's when I said to myself, hmm, maybe should have fucking sprung the extra 50 bucks for the bathroom, 50 bucks a month for our own bathroom.

We'll be all right.

Yeah.

Shit, man.

I'm going to run over to KFC.

I'll be there often enough.

It'll be fine.

Yeah.

I can fucking actually run home quicker.

You know,

it's not that bad.

I wanted to just want to mention this coming Thursday, September 30th at 9 p.m.

Eastern, that's the podcast awards ceremony.

So I don't know.

It would be nice to start off this new chapter with some fucking brass.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Why not, right?

Some gold.

Put it up there.

People's People's choice.

But there's nothing anybody can do, right?

This is just to view it.

This is just to view it.

Yeah, whatever has happened has happened.

But we're.

So a week from today, this is Thursday today, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, it's a week from today.

Well, these are weird categories.

There's so many subcategories to podcasts now, man.

Best black podcast, best Asian podcast.

No, is there a best Spanish podcast?

I would have thought not so much

that kind of

breaking down or breaking up in the categories.

I would have thought more like sports, recreation,

entertainment, pop culture.

Right, not best female hosted and best male hosted.

Arts, podcast listening platform, manager tools business category.

Dude, Nada, we're businessmen.

Yeah.

Yeah, we are businessmen.

We could fucking do a podcast about business.

First fucking rule:

spring to 50 bucks to get your own bathroom.

As I said to Mary Bethel, I was like, Wow, I've never had this before.

Where, like, I had my own office, and I'm like, Honey, I'm working late tonight.

Yeah, and she goes, You know what that means?

Don't say that.

Yeah, you could go there and fucking spend all hours of the night there because I'm sure you'll have company because I'm sure Ginnam is going to be there all hours of the night.

Ginnam does not have to hang out at parking lots till fucking wee hours of the morning.

Now he can hang out there till however long he wants, and it's going to be like his home away from home.

And it sounds like it's not much of an upgrade, but it's an upgrade from a port-a-potty.

I mean, you say you're saying home away from home.

Like, how long?

What's the over on under on it becoming his home?

Well, he eventually.

Well, this is, oh my God, this is a great story.

I know you, I don't know if you guys want to leave, but this is a great story.

So

we're moving stuff into

the new place, and we go over to KFC.

We go over to KFC to get some potatoes.

And Giddam is there, and I say to Giddam, I order what I want, mashed potatoes, of course.

And

some guy is waiting for his order, and he sees Giddam, and he goes, dude,

much props for the beard, much respect for the beard.

And Giddam then proceeds to

inform him

on

everything about why he's growing the beard the way he's growing.

I don't know if you guys even know why he's growing the beard.

I thought it was a COVID thing.

And then he just thought it would let it go to him.

It would stop germs from going in his mouth.

No, no,

it didn't help you, did it?

No,

I got it anyway.

No, no, no.

I thought, like, because you couldn't get it trimmed and shit.

Oh, no, no, no.

He calls it, you know, I mean, I understand it.

It's a grief beard.

He's growing it because

he doesn't want to shave it until he's back in the house, in his old place.

So that's why he hasn't shaved all this time.

And so he told this man that he, you know, he had a house fire and he, and all the tragedy that came with that, and why he's chosen to let his beard grow like this

and because he's out of home.

So then we sit down and get him doesn't order anything.

So I'm the only one eating.

He had lunch earlier.

So, we're eating at the table, and the guy who asked about his beard is eating at another table.

He throws his food away, he's done, and he comes over to us and he opens with this, which I don't know how he's going to follow, but he goes, Hey, I don't mean to

put you on the spot.

Is that what he said?

You know, he said, I don't mean to put you on the spot or make you feel uncomfortable,

but I want to give you guys $20 for groceries.

Wow, yeah,

And I was, I, so I, so he thought that we both were homeless.

Oh my God.

I mean, were you dressed like this?

What were you wearing?

Well, my wife says it's that fucking thing on your chin.

You look like you're homeless, she said, because

you let your hair go on your chin, my chin.

Right.

So I'm like, really?

I mean, but like, I mean, compared to his, how can anybody even notice what's on my chin?

So I tell the guy, I was like, oh, man.

And get him's like, kind of like, you know, he's touched.

I'll take that 20.

So I tell the man, I'm like, oh, man, that is unbelievable.

That is amazing.

You are so kind.

I said, but he doesn't need $20.

We don't need $20.

Amazing gesture, though.

Like, I cannot believe how kind you are.

He goes, no, really?

He goes, no, no, no.

Take it, take it.

And I'm like, no, it's okay.

We don't need $20.

And he goes, you sure?

You sure?

And

he leaves.

And so we get in the car.

And I'm like, so what do you think after that?

I said to Giddam.

I go,

what's your takeaway from that?

And Giddam goes, that he's a nice man.

I go, yes, he's a nice man.

I said, but

you need to trim your beard, dude.

You look homeless.

Now people are thinking shit about me.

And like, you know, you need to just like, it's time.

And he said he was going to trim it, but he still hasn't trimmed it.

So we're hoping, I'm hoping that, like,

you know, that he will take notice of that.

I mean, he trimmed it up.

He trims it up nice.

He's losing weight now.

Now

we'll lose a little bit of that beard.

That'll be looking like the old get him soon.

You just got to take those steps.

Like, we had to take steps.

Yeah.

You know, everybody has to take steps.

Got to take steps.

Maybe ones at times, but there's still steps.

You should have taken that 20.

It would have made up for the tip that you accidentally put in the pizza place.

But there was something else.

I know you wanted me to say Tom Steve, Dave.

That was a good one.

That was a good one.

But there was something else I was going to

say, before I even found out about that, before I even remembered about the homeless, the two homeless guys at KFC that were us.

I can't remember.

I guess tell them, Steve, Dave.