#478: The Spy Who F&@ked Me

Pea or pie poo, sheep pee pow, sheep, pee, poo.

Don't try that Ming shit.

Good old hairy tits.

Everybody listening to this probably knew that about ten minutes ago.

Tell him Steve Dave.

Hello, welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave, down here at the Tell'em Steve Dave General store with Q.

Hello.

And with Walt.

Yo.

How you doing, boys?

Very happy to be back here.

Bit of sad news.

We have to offer condolences to our friend Frank Five.

Shock G died, the Humpty Hump guy from Digital Underground.

And that's his favorite band from when he was a kid.

Loves the Humpty Dance.

He even does a Humpty Dance, he told me last night.

Really?

Yeah.

Are you aware of this passing?

I'm not sure who they're talking about.

I know who it is.

I didn't realize anybody within our circle would be mourning so deeply.

Yeah.

Or is this with

the music industry mourning over this loss?

Oh, yeah, definitely.

He's a bigwig.

He was a big wig.

Pioneer, I would imagine, right?

Definitely.

Humpty Dance was like, that's the novelty song, I guess, that everybody likes.

But if you listen to Digital Underground, was it about Big Booty?

I don't think so.

Okay.

I don't know why.

Why do I think that?

You probably think of Cermix a lot.

Okay, yeah.

Yeah, Digital Underground.

But that's sad, isn't it?

When any human dies.

He was a young guy, too, 57.

Really?

Yeah,

when I see shit like that, I'm like, well, he died at 57, and she died at 52, and he died at 60.

I'm like, wow, I'm fucking right in the pocket, man.

Yeah, but then you also see the 116-year-old.

world's oldest man or woman, I couldn't tell from the picture,

passed away.

So then you got that on the the other hand, you know?

That's true.

116.

Do you think you'd want to be 116?

I'm sure we've posed this question many times over the 400 episodes.

We're going to pose it again.

I know.

I would sign up for that in a heartbeat.

Yeah.

Regardless of the level of pain.

He or she looked like she was, or he was having a great time on that picture that I saw.

You know, blowing out a cake his last birthday.

My birthday's birthday.

It's last birthday.

there was uh i saw footage i can't remember it was just like some news channel and it was a woman talking to this a newscaster talking to this lady who was i don't know she turned like 105 or some shit this this old woman looked like she wanted to jump off a building they're like so so how are you going to celebrate and she just doesn't even say anything

i think you know when we we talked about that woman wasn't there a game show we did where a woman said she only had one good day in her entire life and she was like 104?

Wasn't that?

That's got to be exaggerating.

That's just got to be some like an overly dramatic person.

No, I thought you, you, I thought you brought it in.

Am I thinking about this right?

She had one good day.

She was 104.

I don't think it was on Tell him Steve Dave.

I would have remembered that.

Yeah, I don't remember that either.

Really?

Yeah.

Fucking other podcast am I doing?

Well,

it could have been on anything, right?

I mean, I guess.

You're all over the place.

I guess, but I mean, still, I thought.

He's not wrong.

A Russian woman who claims to be the world's oldest at 129, this is a couple years back, says she's had one happy day in her life.

Really?

What was the day?

What did it consist of?

Let's see.

They've been filled with.

Her days have been, years have been filled with more misery than happiness.

At least that's how she tells it.

They're calling her a liar.

She's kind of

annoyed at

Allah for allowing her to live so long.

It was God's will.

Why did Allah give me such a long life and so little happiness?

I would have been dead long ago if not for Allah, who was holding me in his arms.

It was hard to live when

all who remembered you died long ago.

And it's very scary to die, however old you are.

So this is a woman that was just kind of sitting around waiting to drop dead

and watched all her friends go long before.

Like, that's the thing.

It's like, you're 116.

I know.

You don't think about

all the passing and all the times you got to mourn of all the people who.

How many fucking funerals you'd have to go to?

Yeah.

I mean, after a while, you just stop going, right?

Yeah.

I mean, you would have to be real close.

Like, no fringe.

It's going to be weird, like, when

my circle starts dying off.

Like, starts dying.

I mean, I'm not looking at you for any reason.

I'm just because I'm talking to you.

No, like, it's going to be weird.

Like, we don't know who has

a defective heart or an aneurysm waiting to burst, but like, it's coming.

I wouldn't have thought it about Kev.

Oh, my God.

That's crazy.

That's right.

You're right.

Like, what if Kev had died?

I can't even conceive of it.

It's just, I'd be like, wait, what?

Yeah.

I'll tell you, since that we did that podcast with him,

and he told that story about being on the

table and thinking about his friends and stuff like that.

And it was nice of him to throw me in there.

I'm sure it wasn't in there, but it was nice for him to say that.

But it really did get me.

I was like, wow.

And I've been texting with him more than I normally do

because of that story, because of him on the table.

I was like, wow.

I was like, fuck, we really, like, I know I knew it, but it was like to hear the story of him going through it, it it it shook me a little bit.

Yeah.

And I'm pretty sure it's Jordan who's to thank for all all that.

Jordan was the one who insisted that he not do the second show, and she was the one who insisted that he go to the hospital.

And she, that girl pays all dividends.

She's awesome.

Yeah, she's pretty awesome.

Yeah.

So, yep, poor husband.

You never get rid of her, right?

After that, no fucking way.

No matter how, any kind of misstep she has in the future, it's like you, you still, it's like, but you know what?

But then I think of George Lopez.

Didn't his wife give him a fucking

thing?

is that he left her?

Yeah, he left her, yeah.

She gave him a kidney, and he left her.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I know we've talked about this too.

We've been at this too long about five years ago.

We should just take a year off and come back and start it all over again.

But I do have a story we've never talked about.

Okay, unless Spry has something.

No, I was just looking up George Lopez.

Okay, go ahead.

But

I want to know if you guys have ever heard of the story of

she

P or Pai Poo.

She Pao.

She Poo.

She pee and poo.

She poo pee.

Maybe Gidham can look it up too while he's over there.

She S H I P E I P U.

Have you guys ever heard of the story of?

I have not.

Okay, so this was a person, and this one was alerted to me on Twitter.

A listener said, I want you guys to talk about this.

And whatever reason.

And I clicked on it, and I kind of thought, this is interesting.

This person, he was a Chinese opera singer,

and he was a spy.

And during the big born World War II, he seduced secrets from a French embassy worker, an employee at the French embassy.

and convinced the French embassy worker that he was a female.

He had a 15-year relationship

with this French embassy worker and even told him that he had a child, that he,

slash, she, had a child with him.

Wow.

Look, I'm not going to claim that I pay attention to detail,

but holy shit.

I mean, that is stunning.

Who doesn't notice that after 15 years?

After 15 seconds, I'd be like, what's that?

No, I mean, you could get away with a good like two-month run on fooling me, but like 15 years is a long time.

Like,

now, this story came out

because he, you know, and he was vilified, you know, for turning a traitor, revealing

France's secrets to

the Chinese government through this spy.

Oh, winning.

And on top, he gets fucking fooled that he's dealing with a dude.

Yeah, like

when tranny tricking is your second worst offense.

See, I don't think we're allowed to say tranny trick anybody.

Is that out, too?

I think the word words out.

I was unaware.

Jesus Christ.

Somebody has to update me.

But I maintain.

I'm updating you.

I'm done doing it.

Thank you.

But I maintain that.

Don't try that Ming shit here either.

A lot's going on right now in the world.

Sorry.

In the laws of war, and the Geneva Convention has put down there are certain things you can do in warfare and not do in warfare.

Yeah.

I maintain that shit should be outlawed.

You cannot send in dudes dressed as chicks to fuck with the enemy because that, yeah, because that's more fucked up than like dropping a fucking daisy cutter on top of somebody, dude.

Because they get the secrets plus your humility.

Yeah, I mean, like, if you want to send in, if you want to send in women, spies,

like...

I'm talking about like born women, you know, not scientifically.

I had walked that tiger up.

Let me see how you come out of this.

Suddenly, I don't look so bad.

But like if you want to send in spies who are born female to seduce the enemy,

that's all that should be fair.

But you don't think all is fair in love and war.

Like you draw the line

at the old T-trick.

How do we dance around this?

How do we talk about it?

Why did you bring this topic?

It's the new telepathy.

But you don't think that that should be one of the things that the Geneva Convention takes a look at now and be like, okay, no more sending in

people posing as to be the opposite sex.

Like right under chemical warfare.

No transgenders.

What country was he from?

He was from China.

What the fuck did I tell you guys about China?

They don't obey any laws.

I told you I watched that documentary

on the history of the entire human race and the Chinese.

Am I doing another podcast?

Yeah, I think you are.

Talking about what's going on.

about it.

Did you start up what say you?

No, Sal's busy.

He's doing his other things.

I swear to God, I thought we talked about this.

I watched this documentary on the history of all humanity, and I walked away from it with a really healthy fear of the Chinese.

Like they're fucking, they're responsible for fucking, they invented guns, they invented gunpowder.

Like, they will fucking not stop.

Yeah, until they, that's actually

what

derailed them from taking over the entire world was open.

It's fucking crazy, man.

Derails you.

They might have invented

the old pose as a woman.

Get all the state secrets you can get.

That is what I'm saying.

They're not going to stop it.

I think they fucking send a real female opera singer in and seduce this guy.

This guy is so fucking desperate that

you've got to be very sexually

ignorant

to have a 15-year love affair and and not figure it out at all, right?

Well, I wonder how often he saw him.

Gene, you got some information on this case?

You want to come over here and not fucking.

I know you're ready to talk about it from across the room.

Yep, that's true.

Well, apparently the diplomat had only had relations with men before this.

Oh, all right.

So they met in 1964 and China.

Oh, so it wasn't the WW2.

What war was this then?

It was around Vietnam and Korean wars.

It's not about the Korean war.

Why was France and China then going on?

They opened the embassy in 1964, and this person was teaching Chinese to the families of the people who were working in the embassy.

Okay.

And told this guy that he/slash she

was a woman who was forced to dress like a man to please his father.

Because they guys had that possibility.

So there's more to the story than it just from.

It was discovered five years later by the Chinese government, and they pressured the person

to steal documents.

Oh, so they were already getting it on?

Yes.

And he knew that it was a man dressed as a woman.

No.

No, no, no.

They maintained a sexual relationship in darkness, it says.

Well, that is the best way.

You can get, you can trick.

I won't say trick, but you can do a lot of you do a lot of

things.

I meant tricks in a good way.

Evil.

Like tricks you can pull in the bedroom

to make you believe that, like, you know, that everything's where it should be.

Yeah.

What's the trick?

well if it's you know if it's

yeah

yeah and plus if you're and you know and if you're

skilled enough in other areas maybe you forget about you forget about the other way and well I was watching a it was like one of those forensic file one of those type of shows the other day and it was a guy who who showed up and he was he was she was it was dressed as the dude was dressed as a girl not a true transgender like a transvestite i guess and um the

the dude found out only because the the girl you know the girl just wanted to ass fuck so always seemed to be on her period

so she's like it's okay though like you can just fuck me in the ass so that's wait what was this on forensic files

I mean was that language

but do you think that the um that whoever is handling like the United Nations could they come out today and be like you know moving forward you know all nations must sign this war agreement that you know if you're going to send in spies into former relationships they'd get canceled yeah they would

the united nations would get canceled they would get canceled

yeah i mean you look at like how they're trying to how like some people are getting so upset about um uh transsexual people playing sports like

like they would just be like now you don't want them in the spying game and it would be over but could you then say that, like, well, all nations have to sign this document that will agree to no more using sex to get state secrets from anybody?

That's against

you're not just trying to outlaw gay shenanigans or

all sexually.

Yeah, like, don't, you can't use it to get secrets.

Like, you can't seduce

a senator to reveal the secrets if you're a foreign spy.

Like, let's say you're like this real hot foreign female spy.

You can't come in and use your sexuality.

What do you want to know, honey?

You can't do it.

It's against all the

rules of war.

I would hope that the United States doesn't hold to that.

Really?

You think that we got spies that have to get down and dirty to get secrets from?

I think

Russia and dominance must be established and maintained at any costs, I believe.

Didn't they just catch a lady on the planet that they're training spies to sleep

with foreign nationals.

No way.

I don't know.

Didn't they just bust somebody?

Like it was a, God, what nationality was she?

But she had, it was like 16 different guys or something.

Really?

Yeah.

Hold on.

Adam, are you on it?

I don't know.

I just feel like that would be like very sexist.

Why?

They could use hot dudes, too, to get...

Pelosi?

Like, what if they sent a shoe a hot dude

to catch Pelosi's eye?

Suddenly she's spilling.

No, no, I'm talking about America.

I can't believe it.

Because if America is training female operatives in the art of

seduction,

I think it would come back to fucking bite them if that news ever got out.

That could destroy the CIA.

Why, though?

Why do you think that's why I'm so upset?

It's horrific, though.

I mean, you're training your female operatives that they have to sleep with the enemy or the

target.

If you're a Chinese, like the Chinese government's in charge of you and they're like, hey, this is what you're going to do,

fucking somebody is probably the least of that.

Right, but yeah, that's why we've got to be better than China.

That's what I'm saying.

America.

America

cannot partake in that kind of thing.

But why?

Like, you would send a spy into a situation where she might get killed or have to kill someone.

Different ballgame, though.

But not in a situation where she may have to bang someone?

Yeah, I think it's totally like it's a game changer.

Wow.

It's a game changer.

I think society just has no fucking place.

You could put yourself in harm's way.

But not in Patreon's way.

But you can't go to bed with a target.

Look, you see what China's willing to roll out.

They're willing to do whatever it takes.

Okay?

It's not going to go well for us.

They're not willing to.

I think the days of James Bond, of secret agents betting everything that moves,

those days are over.

Well, then why the fuck would anybody want to be a spy if those days are over?

What the fuck do you get out of it?

State secrets.

Who cares?

The same state that's like, hey, you can't fuck anybody.

Here's the secret.

I hate my state.

Yeah, I thought that was an interesting story, though.

More so because I'm like, that's fucked up, though, that, you know,

that you get tricked that long, though.

I didn't believe you have a child at the end of the day.

And also, also, like, an opera singer?

Like, it had to have been a soprano, I assume.

Like, otherwise.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I just can't.

Sorry, like a couple times a year.

When you look up the picture of the opera singer.

Yeah.

Whoo, no, it's

it is.

Yeah,

it's scary.

It's the eye of the beholder, this one.

Yeah, it's it's kind of disturbing looking.

It's very,

yeah, it looks something I like out of a like out of a

out of like a

some sort of horror movie.

Oh my god.

Come on.

That would not fool me.

That is somebody who wants to be fooled.

Yeah, yeah.

Who's more than willing to be fooled?

They made a play out of it called M Butterfly.

M butterfly?

That's what that's about?

Yeah.

That's where BD Wong got to start.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Everybody listening to this this probably knew that about 10 minutes ago

for those who didn't hear gatum just said madam butterfly is

that's different from yes oh which is different than madam butterfly oh i thought madam butterfly okay oh so it was a take it was like kind of a cutesy take on madam butterfly oh okay all right all right what a twist god i forgot how good the four-color demon flags look yeah we're at the general store and we have four color demon flags in stock i gotta get one you don't have one i don't don't think I have one.

I think you guys gave me one, and then I left it in the store.

Okay.

Because

I want to have it.

Fly that.

Fly your freak flag.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm getting it.

I'm going to get it.

Oh, I wanted to talk to you about motorcycles.

We could talk about it because I may get something new.

And if I do, I'm going to get the tank painted with the four-color demons logo and I want to fly the flag off it.

Like, you know how they do that.

So I'm getting excited.

Yeah.

Could that cause some sort of wind imbalance?

You know, I don't want to see you

losing it.

After 9-11 darren and i had these massive flags on our motorcycles like we would drive around with them on did they cause any kind of like like you know like wind like resistance or something cause you ever to like feel like you might lose control or anything no not really the um focus on lighters do we have them anymore are they out of stock we haven't had zippos in quite some time our zippo connection you know he went mia yeah he just stopped dealing with us and i never really looked i think i may have another one though i did i did some legwork yeah

i was talking to Big Game.

He's like, oh, I got connections at Zippo.

And then as soon as I'm like, all right, let's go.

Put up or shut up.

You gave me a name.

You said you were a Madowan.

You never told me this.

Yes, I did.

Because

a lot of people have been asking me on Twitter if we're ever making them again.

And I was like, oh, I didn't even know we weren't making them.

Oh, we haven't made them in years.

Really?

Yeah, that guy.

I just forgot.

You know what?

I don't personally ever have a a use for a lighter.

So it's something that's not in my daily routine.

So I never think to myself, oh, yeah, lighters.

Right.

Yeah.

Get them.

Can you get on it?

Yeah.

Thanks, bud.

All right.

Walt, I was wondering

it'll lead into something else, but if suddenly Deb started calling you bro,

how many times before you're like,

what are you doing?

Once?

Just once.

She's just like, he's up, bro.

Yeah, yeah, it's so out of character.

That word has probably never even come out of her mouth.

So for her to start using it ironically or not.

Like as a pet name?

Yeah, I would feel that it was

really

strange.

Why is that?

Has your wife been starting calling you bro?

No, but I saw...

I was watching TV and this girl was calling some other guy bro.

And I was like, I wonder

how would I like it?

Are you watching my pet show from the 70s?

Maybe Maybe that's why.

No, I don't think I can't remember what it was.

But, like, it made me think, like, do you have pet names or do you just call her Deb?

No?

No, no, no, pet names, huh?

No, yeah, that's just not us.

We don't have the,

we would never keep up with it.

Couldn't keep up with it.

Well, now it seems really good.

Memory, like, you know, trying to remember the pet name would just feel like such a task.

How many times could you call her, bro?

Okay, what else do we got here?

Oh.

are you watching Sasquatch, Walt?

I watched the first episode last night.

That's odd that you even mentioned it.

So did I.

Yeah.

Did you watch it?

No, what's going on?

It's on Hulu.

It's a mini-series about

a real crime drama mini-series about the

murder of three men on a pot farm in the 90s, and they theorize it was committed by a Sasquatch.

Which I thought was funny that they keep saying homicide and murder when it's like, if you got killed by a tiger, no one's killed.

Or a bear.

Which is more likely what happened to these guys.

Yeah, exactly.

Oh my God, that bear murdered them.

Yeah, you would say that bear killed them.

But I thought, it's so weird that you caught the same thing I did.

I was like, why the fuck are they trying to force feed down that this is a murder?

And it sounds way cooler than that first episode was.

I thought the first episode sucked.

I don't think I'll ever go back to watch part two.

Oh, you don't think so?

It's a lot about pot, too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, because it was in the 90s.

Cosmic.

A little bit cosmic.

Yeah, Yeah, it was in the 90s during this time when they were growing a lot of weed up in Humboldt and

Mendocino County.

One other county, I can't remember what the other one is.

And

it's interesting in as much as

the people that live in that area where they're like, don't go into it's almost like inner city shit where they're like, don't go into this area because it's too dangerous.

It's the same thing, except it's fucking hillbillies growing weed and shit.

I don't remember them saying that.

How many episodes have you watched?

Just the first.

And you took that away from that?

I took it away from like, don't go into this certain area because you're going to be watched.

There's something like, you know, they're just growing too fucking.

Oh, you thought it was because Sasquatch is there.

Yeah.

Well, no, they said they don't like outsiders.

So I thought that they were talking about people.

Right, but it's pretty remote, though.

I mean,

how are you going to run across anybody unless you're looking for a certain farm?

To me,

I can't recommend it off that first episode.

You could recommend that, you think?

I'm going to give the second one a chance to check it out.

It just feels like a total waste of time.

Just no fucking chance on the planet.

Fucking.

That's the problem.

That's the fucking problem.

I know how it ends, all right?

Oh, you already know.

I don't know how it ends.

No, they don't find Sasquatch.

But do they, is there like, I'm sure that open-ended question, like, what really happened?

We'll never know, right?

Is that what I'm being set up for here after watching six hours of this?

I think so.

I think that's what we're looking at.

And those two guys who, like, it was these two life partner guys who are fighting like cats and dogs for some reason on camera.

They're like, they're arguing whether or not

they saw Sasquatch or fucking if it was this was Sasquatch was the one who fucking murdered these three guys.

They don't even know who the fucking three guys are.

They can't find any record of it.

Well, I'm sure that's coming.

I mean, they want it.

They got to stretch this out to six episodes.

But they maintain, Q, and I wanted to get your opinion on this, that the Patterson footage from, you know, the one, that famous footage where bigfoot is lurking and walking

strange walk yeah yeah

that is still the um

the creme de la creme the um

the best footage still to this date from 1967.

do you agree with that

it's the only one that comes to mind but didn't they already didn't they already didn't patterson on his deathbed site it was hoax yeah he debunked it himself yeah and then there you go but they had the guy and and and they're trying to tell people that there's another guy and like they give another the Grimes.

Is that the guy's name?

Grimes and Patterson?

And I was just like, I've never heard of the the Grimes before.

It's always been the Patterson footage.

Yeah, the second dude who com comes in, he starts weighing in heavily on

yeah, like but he's making it he's no Patterson said it was fake.

Grimes is still maintaining because he's alive.

He's not on his deathbed but it's real footage.

I still need to make a book.

I still want to get booked for him.

He's like, dickhead, why did you fucking not say that?

Let me see.

Well, I think they got they kind of had a messy falling out, Grimes and Patterson.

Oh, yeah.

Money-wise.

I think Patterson wanted all the money for the footage, and he never credited Grimes.

Well, how, I mean, especially at the time, I wonder how much you could have made.

You know, like once you sell it, then it's just like

whoever has it owns it in perpetuity, I would assume.

You still look at that footage.

It's awesome.

It's still fucking awesome, and it's still strange and unusual.

Like,

it's hard to figure out, did they just luck into it with the bulges in the right area of the Bigfoot?

You know, where the muscles compact and they move in a way that really move like muscles.

This isn't just some like

Bigfoot costume that tell them Steve Dave keeps trotting out for every fucking video project that we do.

This thing looked like it had muscle structure.

Yeah.

And it has breasts.

Oh, really?

You didn't know that?

I never knew that.

That's a female Yeti.

So big.

I've read articles where they think there's a baby Yeti attached to the belly, like holding on as it's walking.

Really?

I've never read that.

No, I've never read that.

Have you looked at the whole uncut footage?

Are you just looking at that fucking search of two seconds?

Yeah, basically that.

This is not.

It said

Patterson died of cancer in 1972 and maintained right to the end that the creature on the film was real.

Really?

And Gimlin,

Iron.

Gremlin, right?

G-I-M.

Oh, okay.

Gimlin has always denied being involved in any sort of hoax.

Okay, so

they're saying it's real.

I could have sworn.

Yeah, me too.

Gim says he thinks we're thinking of Nessie, the Loch Ness monster.

Well, yeah, maybe you're right.

Yeah, like didn't the ladies, like, or what did, or that the Pixie, the Pixie picture with the two ladies who took a picture in the 30s of Pixies?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that may be what I'm thinking of.

But those were cool.

If you look at that footage, footage, Q,

that Bigfoot is stacked.

Yeah,

nice Bigfoot.

And apparently, when you're

into contact or you're in a close proximity to a Bigfoot,

musty, sweet, pungent odor.

Yep.

Could you...

Could you get up close to see those titties or with that kind of...

That I have heard, that they reek, right yeah they smell like ungodly well the allure of titties has largely

has it faded with it faded over the years like i like you know you look you appreciate but you're not jumping through any hoops for them anymore you know what i'm saying you're not going to go to the sea north to the north pacific

deep into like from like 20 from like age 28 to like 38 i was on a massive titty run it was absolutely fantastic no more mystery but if i had a chance to get up there and sniff up on some of them smelly Bigfoot titties, I think I would take it.

Right.

Well, here's something I'm going to blow your mind and really fucking maybe even have to make you cross your legs.

The pungent odor

may be because the Bigfoot is

in heat and it's coming from her vagina.

Oh.

God.

They said that on episode one.

I'm not making this up right.

No, they said.

Yeah, they said

that odor made me look.

super cute.

She was wincing.

Yeah, can't wait to get home and watch it.

Yeah, but that is how she calls a mate with that.

She unleashes that odor from her.

I guess because there's so few Bigfoot that that odor would have to be

come from miles away for that.

Does that mean that that Bigfoot female Bigfoot must get their period then?

Oh, yeah, they said that too.

Really?

Yeah.

And you don't want to watch the second episode of this?

It sounds like the craziest shit ever.

Because it's so forced.

It just is.

Daddy's right about.

Yeah.

They're trying so hard to make this Bigfoot murder that I'm like,

come on, please.

The journalist seemed like an interesting guy, though.

He had a storied career.

Yeah,

he was like, I hung with Gabriel Comberlay.

Yeah, all undercover shit.

Aryan Nation.

Like anything that's dangerous and cool, this guy was doing it.

But do you think this hurts his credibility now working on this case?

Is this like the,

like I'm cashing out?

Like, you know, like

I can never go undercover again after this because now I'm on Hulu.

Yeah.

That's a good point because he did like, I mean, when I say every single story he did was like, holy shit, that's cool.

You have to have fucking balls to do that.

This does not seem like it takes balls.

Yeah.

Like, I'm not saying it.

Once you go on the cover with like, like a white supremacist group or whatever, it's like, and they find out, aren't you you hunted like aren't they like we got to get this guy uh i would imagine so but i mean how much are they gonna i mean it depends it depends on how bad he made them look i don't know how you can make arian nation look good

i mean there's no positive spin to be that's a tough one and i think like his his his groundbreaking um journalist work was in the in the early or late late 80s early 90s late 90s early 2000s so i mean like has he just like has all the stories dried up and now he's like

cashing out on this Bigfoot murder documentary.

Yeah, I mean, maybe somebody came to him and they're like, Hey, do you want to do this Bigfoot thing?

And I was like, How much are you going to pay me?

Not maybe.

That's what happened.

I watched the documentary.

You guys are a little bit more.

I can't believe we didn't talk about the Night Stalker.

I watched the documentary on The Night Stalker.

Oh, yeah, I watched that.

The murderer?

Yeah, it is fucking insane.

He should be the biggest serial killer.

Is anybody worse than him?

In In your opinion?

Ed Gein.

Yeah, but Texas Chainsaw.

He inspired that.

Yeah, but this guy.

Son of Sam.

Pen Psycho.

Son of Sam was pretty bad.

I mean, you got like Jeffrey Dahmer.

Right,

you got the Ted Bundy.

I'm not saying anybody.

You got

the fucking clown, Prince of Evil.

The real clown, Prince of Evil.

Because I watched that documentary on him that they just did on Peacock.

And apparently, they have all this footage of them interviewing him in jail that's never been seen before.

So half the documentary is the case building, like all documentaries.

And then the other half is footage of this interview with John Wayne Gacy, where he's just lying.

He's just,

he's like, I don't know how bodies got under the room.

He says shit like that.

There's like 30 of them.

He said he killed one person in self-defense.

This was what he was saying.

He killed one person in self-defense.

put them, buried them under the house because he didn't know what to do.

And that emboldened all his friends to start killing people and putting them under the house when he wasn't around.

Like, this is the shit he said.

In all seriousness, he wasn't like fucking around.

You're just like, this guy's a fucking asshole, man.

Are you telling me then that, like, you just have to cop to at a certain point when you have 30 bodies?

You, you can't, you just got to be like, I give up to get the game.

The game's over.

He admitted it.

Like, he, he, he, he, he was like, he gave an insanity plea, which means you did it.

You're saying you did it, but you're crazy.

And then he drew that map where all the bodies are.

So for him to turn around and say, it was like you wanted to punch this fucking motherfucker in the face more than you wanted to.

Is it because he wanted to go on appeal and he's like, you know what?

Jail sucks.

I'm going to see if I can get out of this.

He was just a lying, crazy piece of shit.

He's got pictures of him with either Ford or Reagan.

I can't remember.

Reagan with Carter.

Rosalind Carter.

Yeah.

Yeah.

First lady.

But I think the Night Stalker was fucking worse because there was no,

he would fucking murder and rape an 80-year-old woman.

He would murder and rape a fucking.

Is that Ramirez?

Yeah, Ramirez, like a seven-year-old girl.

Like, there was no rhyme or read, no ethnicity.

Sometimes he went out four nights in a week and fucking did it.

So you're just like, it was so random.

It was insane.

When you look at that guy and you realize his background, right?

Like his uncle coming home from Vietnam and talking about raping ladies and showing decapitated heads and all that other shit.

Is that like, is that the tipping point right there where it's like.

It has to be.

Well, his father abused him.

Yeah.

And then his uncle, right, did all that shit.

And then his uncle shot his wife

in front of him when he was a kid.

You're like, it's a stew.

But then you look at Gacy, too, and it's just like, yeah, his father beat the shit out of him.

His father was an alcoholic.

Somebody molested him.

You're just like,

these are the ticks to how to make a serial killer.

It's really fucking crazy.

It really is.

Yeah, there's like, just, you know, check this box, check this box, and then it's like, you got yourself a serial killer.

But that's what I'm saying.

The Night Stalker, to me, was above and beyond them all.

I thought because he was so random and he was doing it for Satan and shit like that.

And he was like drawing pentagrams on the wall.

Yeah, I mean, he is up there.

It's not like he's

an unknown serial killer that nobody knows about.

But so many people don't.

I've been telling people to work.

I've been like, you got to watch this documentary.

I was fucking trying.

You're fucking talking to the wrong people.

You got to come to the Tell him Steve Day General Store.

That's all we talk about.

That's what I'm doing.

That's what I'm here doing.

We know serial killers down here at the Tell Steve Day General Store.

I'm just throwing my hat with the ring that I think he was the worst.

I think he was the worst.

I don't think there is

a strong argument.

If that's who you think it is,

that's who the residents are.

We're talking about at the general store if we're not going to argue about it.

No, I just think that you guys disagree with each other.

It's not like sports where you can be like, you know, I think this one's a better fucking pitcher.

I mean, they're all fucking horrible.

They're all horrible.

I think he's the worst.

Do you remember that footage?

I know you saw it.

It was Richard Speck.

He was,

he

wasn't a serial killer.

He was a mass murderer.

He was taking hormone injections in jail.

He was taking hormone injections in jail, so he grew these tits and they had like this undercover footage, like or somehow.

Like they were, like, they were partying and jailing.

Yeah, and they're fucking them and shit.

And he's like, I love it, Jazz, awesome.

Oh, gross.

Did they put him to death, right?

Richard Ramirez?

Ramirez died of natural causes while on death row.

Gacy, they did.

Gacy, they got.

Gacy, they killed.

And who's the Bundy?

He was executed, too.

Yet to see a documentary about him.

Oh, dude.

He might, you know, every time you watch a new documentary, you're going to be like, oh, my God, this one's the worst.

No fucking way, because I watched Ramirez went first.

And Gacy, even though I found him just a fucking asshole I wanted to punch, I still thought the other guy was personal.

But the clown thing, that doesn't fucking shake you up.

He wasn't using it to kill people, he was just being a clown, right?

But clowns are fucking spooky, man.

They're spooky, and then like creepy.

And it's not like he was just a contractor, right?

Isn't that what he did?

Yeah, so he's a contractor, and it's not like Edgar was a contractor where he goes out to work, then comes home and shit.

Like, this guy was like very active in the community, fucking Rotary Club, all that shit.

So he's out there mingling and like being normal.

Yeah.

Like somebody that you'd be like, I mean, how do you not step step away and be like, holy shit?

They had people in interviews were just like,

oh, wow.

No way to see it coming.

Have you watched the BTK fucking documentaries?

He's worse than

that.

This is what I like.

All right.

Now that's all.

I think he's the worst one.

Worst in a lot of ways, but worse than like where I'm like, that may be the most fucked up person that has ever walked this planet.

Those pictures of him.

And the fact that he kept it hidden from his wife, if you're to believe the wife.

It is the absolute most unnerving case.

I know a little bit of the death.

They're all unnerving.

But

I'm going to hunt down the information during this week about BTK.

I'll watch it all.

And I know he's vicious.

Oh, yeah.

I know he is, but there's something about the guy that's on a Tuesday going to rape and murder an 80-year-old woman.

Oh, I agree.

And then on Thursday,

this is why it's hard to argue then, because then you throw these things at you, and I'm like, and then I'm sitting here arguing against, no, no, no, no!

My guy's the most evil of fucked up.

He's not your horse.

So, wait, what is this picture?

That's him.

He would bind himself up, wear stockings, and then like in a clubhouse in his backyard.

Or he would dig, he would go into like open graves and shit.

Yeah, he was

take pictures of himself.

Yeah, but all right, but Gacy fucked corpses, right?

He worked in that morgue.

I mean, that is just.

q's not having it q is not having it no no no no no i i

gacy's not gonna win this

but but i he may win he may win btk i don't think so though night stalker was so fucking crazy it was like insane

like vicious vicious vicious mean he would mock them he would like there was this one thing in the car where it's like this woman who survived um he was in her garage and she was opening the she was in the door going into the house and uh he was in the garage, and he wanted to see the look on her face.

So, he slapped the head of the car so she would turn around, and then she put her hands up.

She shot me.

She basically caught the bullet.

She got shot like a ring stopped it.

He went down.

She went down.

This woman, dude.

So, so he steps over her body to go in and to kill her roommate.

And again, he did it with the roommate.

He scared the roommate.

So she went under the counter and then just stood here like this, waiting for her to peek her head up.

So she did.

He's like, bang.

And blew it over there.

But the woman who he thought he killed, who is still alive and who is one of the bravest people,

she got down the street and she was like, my friend's home.

I can't leave her alone.

She went back to the fucking house before calling the cops to make sure her friend was okay.

But she goes, I went around to the front door because I figured he would leave the back door.

He was coming out her front door while she was there.

And she goes, he just stared at me and I stared at him.

And she goes, she held up her hand and went, You already shot me once today.

Are you going to do it again?

And he just let her go and he just walked away.

You're like, this is fucking crazy.

Like, how do you make sense of reality after this?

You know, it's how do you even say anything?

Like, you're like,

you go through the door, you meet up, you're like, oh, shit, this is a guy that just tried to shoot me.

This bastard.

Yeah.

And then you go inside and your roommate is shot in the face in the kitchen.

It's like.

But I think BTK, why he resonates so much as, well, he's my numero uno is because he's.

your favorite you can say it no no no favorite would not be the right favorite would be like you know my favorite quarterback would you know but you don't say favorite serial killer you just it just doesn't seem like the code of serial killing

serial killing code

but um because btk could have been like

it's like finding out your father you know like the guy who's so super normal and reserved and has a normal job and you know is is just a super normal dude is this monster like this demon from hell.

It's like, that's why it's so

riveting.

Yeah.

And you don't know how he got caught, right?

Oh, yeah.

No, I don't know.

I'll leave it for you to discover.

It's pretty interesting.

Oh, very interesting.

Everything you need to know about this guy, though, is he was a dog catcher.

Now, when you make it your life's work to catch dogs and put them down,

you're a special brand of shit.

Well, the way that,

you know, not to keep backing my horse here, but

the way that Nightstarter got got, did you know how that happened?

Like, how he got caught?

Yeah, yeah.

Riding a bus, and like somebody was reading the newspaper, so he got off the bus and walked into this neighborhood, and basically the whole neighborhood

just got him and beat the shit out of him to the cops.

Now, how could they be certain, right?

How could they be certain that they were fucking pummeling the right guy?

I don't know.

I think they just opened the best.

Probably him.

There were pictures of him in the paper.

Oh, okay.

It wasn't a drawing.

Oh, it wasn't of him.

He had his name, they had his face, and all stuff like that.

He didn't try to disguise himself.

He didn't know because back then,

he didn't know he was on the papers until he walked into a deli, and every fucking one was him.

And he was like, holy shit.

And he jumped on a bus, and a guy on the bus was reading the paper and was like, holy, you.

And then he got off the bus and a neighborhood beat the shit out of him.

They were happy, too.

They were celebrating.

Same way after.

I remember the day Son of Sam was caught.

Yeah, I remember it too.

I came out of, I was at church, and there was this guy came out of Katz's, and he's like, they caught him, they caught the son of a bitch.

And like, at the time, I think we were probably like nine or something or ten.

And I didn't know who he was talking about at first.

And then I saw the paper, and I was like, oh, that guy who's going around killing.

I mean, I didn't know the word serial killer at the time.

I don't even know if it had been coined yet.

That's crazy.

I hope we don't live through this again.

Like anything like that again, like a Stanton I don't serial killer.

Like a major type guy.

They couldn't get away with it anymore.

Oh, yes, they can.

Yeah, with all the ring cams and all the cameras.

Oh, maybe their career won't be as long as

the other ones, but I'm sure

there's always going to be.

One or two.

Yeah.

But they also, like, they

like you see so many times they like they're not doing like the night stalkers like fucked up.

They don't normally just invade houses instead of killing people.

It's like, you know, they go after like prostitutes or people that you know won't be missed and shit.

And if you're doing that, you can probably do do it for a while.

Well, also now, though, man, with the DNA, you also, you could get caught a lot quicker, too, and especially well, these hereditary,

that's how they got the Golden Gate Strangler, wasn't it?

Yeah, the Golden State Strangler or Killer, what they call it.

Yeah, the Golden State Killer.

Yeah, I mean, they couldn't catch this guy.

They thought he was dead, and they did one of those TNAs,

and then they were able to narrow it down, and they got him.

He was an ex-cop.

Really?

Yeah.

Oh, man.

I see that so many times on these forensic file shows where it's like, hey, it happened in 1983, and people are fucking jizzing all over the place when they rape somebody.

They don't give a fuck because they're not like, it doesn't occur to them.

And then you find like 20 years later, it's like the guy's 50, has fucking three kids, has six grandchildren.

They're fucking boat in the keys fishing.

And they fucking bust him.

And they're like, hey, man, your DNA matched up with this rape and murder from fucking, you know, 25, 30 years ago.

God damn it.

Yeah, it's like, shit.

That Golden State strangler, was it strangler or killer?

I thought it was Killer because I don't think he strangled him.

He's a Hillside Strangler who was in L.A.

That was like 35 years.

They were certain he was in jail or dead, right?

Yeah.

Or that he just had to retire because he got too old.

Same thing with BTK.

Really?

Oh, don't tell me the ending.

No,

I can't believe you don't know it.

I don't remember.

You're just getting into it, huh?

No, we've talked about BTK on this show before, but my mind is.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's crazy.

And then the fucking, you watch Nightstalker, Nightstalker, right?

You got to watch it, dude.

Because how great are the cops?

Those two cops?

They're like...

Talk about tenacious.

How there's not like high schools named after these detectives is beyond me.

They're like heroes in the truest sense of the word.

And the one guy also caught the Hillside Strangler.

Whoa, he's got two serial killers under his belt.

They called him it three because the Hillside Strangler was two guys.

So they must have that one of all these TV shows about catching serial killers and cops.

They have to be inspired by this guy, right?

Then you get two and you don't have a TV show?

I never, I asked Troy, Troy came by my house last week for something, right?

He was on Staten Island and he came by with his partner.

And I had just seen the documentary, and I was telling his partner, and I said, These cops, I was like, are they heroes in the industry?

I'm like, do you guys all look up to him?

And he was like, nah, I never even heard of him.

And I'm like, how's that possible?

The guy caught two serial killers.

He should be teaching in every school.

I mean, he should be able to retire and just write books and make a movie about him, about his work.

Maybe they did.

Maybe, is that what Mindhunters is about?

Mindhunters is based on a lot of that kind of stuff.

It's crazy.

They're still alive, and they're telling the stories.

And the documentary goes, well, like, you'll love it.

Like, his wife, like, the toll it takes on the family.

The toll it takes on the family.

And they become obsessed.

Yeah.

And he would just be like, look, he's like,

he's like, I have to go.

He's killing people.

And his wife would be like, no, I understand.

And they start crying and I'm crying.

And think about it, because they're doing that old gumshoe shit detective work.

I mean, they don't have no help of the lab or anything.

It's like

marks.

They're looking for shoe prints.

Shoe prints.

And shit like that, which has fucking got to be so difficult.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

That's the other thing about forensic files is you see a lot of stuff where you're like, this has been dismissed as junk science.

You know what?

I'm sorry, but you know what?

I'd like to ask Troy is like, if you're a detective, how long can you go without solving a case before you're like, you can't be a detective anymore?

Like, could you just coast?

Like, you get given cases, and if you can't get them solved, do they just be like, you got to go back to

being a police officer?

Because you haven't solved any of your cases.

You're the worst detective.

Because the right way is, I mean, it's got to be hard as hell to solve a case.

You have to be able to perform.

Right?

Right, yeah.

What's the matter?

It's got to be easier today, though.

Yo, what's up?

We're doing Tell I'm Steve Dave, and we got a question for you.

Oh, is that Troy?

Yeah, Yeah, Walt has a question, actually.

He wants to know, like, you know, you're a detective.

How long can you go without solving a homicide case before they're like, you know what, this may just, this might not be for you.

Well, if you're a homicide detective, yeah, like,

let's say you go 10 years and every case you ever got, you know, remains unsolved.

Do you, does the department kind of say like you're probably not cut out to be a detective, or can you just coast to retirement, never solving a case?

It's probably after, like, it doesn't matter as many years, but however many cases you catch, like, if you catch case after case and you don't solve them, somebody else will look at it and find enough evidence to solve it, they probably boot you out of homicide.

But

yeah, so it's more of a situation like that.

Like, a homicide case actually doesn't go away until the rest is made.

That's why we have a cold case, so the case is never closed.

But if anybody were to like look at your cases and like, like, man,

all the evidence was right there from day one.

You should have closed this, like, on day two, but it's 10 years later.

Yeah, you're probably losing

do you do you do you look up cold cases or do you have enough like new stuff that you can't really understand

we have enough yeah we have enough especially lately we have enough active stuff to keep us busy so uh they have they have actually a cold case unit and they usually take anything that's older than like seven to ten years so they'll take a look at it and uh what they've been doing lately is because you know back in the 70s and 80s there wasn't really dna so what they've been doing is they'll pull like you know evidence from back then and submit it for DNA testing to try and see if anything will come up now.

So, that's cold cases are becoming more active nowadays.

DNA really is the bane of the criminal, huh?

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

But

in that movie, Super Bad, like, I thought DNA was going to be everywhere.

You'd be surprised at how many cases, like, there is no DNA evidence.

Somebody just shoots somebody on the streets, there's not a lot of DNA.

So, it's

probably more helpful and up close, like stabbings or domestics.

So, you prefer a stabbing over a gunshot?

Yeah.

If you gotta, if you gotta pick one.

Nice.

All right.

Thanks, buddy.

Sorry, both.

You guys be good, all right?

Talk to you.

Thank you.

Talk to you later, man.

See you later.

You think you would be a good homicide detective?

Sometimes I watch First 48 and

some of these people, I'm like, damn, man, they're good.

Like, they're good.

How fucking good.

Yeah, I think it would be interesting, and it looks really, really

like it would be satisfying to do.

But again, we're just watching documentaries and it's all tied up in a fucking 60 minutes with a nice, neat bow tie and all the hard work and all the other things.

That's why I'm like, I cracked another case.

I say that after everyone.

All the hardships and all the things you missed in your family's life because you devoted yourself to this case, it probably wouldn't be for me.

I probably would be like,

I don't know who fucking did it.

What do you want me to kill?

Failure to find out.

We just gave you the file.

There's no way you could know who did it.

Yeah, I think you would have to be real into puzzles and shit.

Oh, yeah.

Like detail-oriented.

I think a lot of those guys, I bet if you look at the IQs of

those detectives, especially the guy who has two under his belt.

Yeah.

I bet you they're nearing in the 148 stratosphere.

Oh, you think?

Oh, fuck yeah.

Well, it's funny, too, because the guy,

the less experienced detective, was young.

He was like 25, and he was a Mexican guy, and it was like, it was still at the time, you know, things are different now.

Everybody gets along.

But back then,

the detectives on the squad were like, get this fucking wet back out of here.

You know what I mean?

Really?

And then he came up.

He was the first one that was like, guys, these are all related, these crimes.

This is a serial killer.

And he's telling the story.

He goes, they laughed me.

Not joking.

He goes, they laughed me out of the room.

He goes, they would bully me about it because my theory was that it was a serial killer.

And they're like, no fucking way.

What do you know?

You're a new kid on the job.

He goes, and then that guy who figured out the Hillside Strangler was like, this fucking kid should be my partner.

He goes, and now I'm riding around with a legend.

He goes, he goes, a lot of people had to eat crow.

It's great.

I'm telling you, that's the best part, right?

Oh, eating crow.

Oh, yeah.

It's not good to eat, but boy, it's good to serve it.

It's good to serve it up.

Oh, yeah.

Love to serve up some crow.

I don't get a chance to do it very often.

But when I do,

it's the best.

You got to savor it.

I like to watch every bite.

You got a little feather

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I'm like, what the fuck does this even mean?

You better let Mary Beth listen to this commercial.

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And they also have their problem-free philosophy.

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I can say that for sure because Mary Beth got a pair of underpanties and she didn't like the design.

You know, like she has that subscription service.

Sent them back.

They wanted them.

No, no, no, no, no, I'm sorry.

Didn't send them back, but they gave her the money.

Nice.

They gave her the money back.

What was the design she didn't like?

I don't know.

It said like send nudes or something.

It sounds like she's picky, like a Johnson.

Like she wants to.

She fucking.

Aren't they free anyway?

No, no, no, no, we pay for this.

Oh, okay.

Look, these free underwear.

I want my money back.

I never paid you.

She changed that name to Johnson and demands a star.

Right out of the gate.

Her and Edgar are fighting on the walls.

That would be something.

That I think I might like wait a second to break it up before we're on a go.

Yeah.

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And what else do I have here?

Fat news.

Woo, it's been a while.

It's been a long time since fat news.

Yeah.

I'm going to talk about a specific fatty.

Is it me?

That fucking piece of shit.

No, it's me.

I weighed in today.

Oh, really?

Because I'm like, yeah, I had been dieting half-heartedly and shit, but I'm like, you know what?

I'm going to do it.

This is it.

I'm going to lose the weight again.

I have gained five pounds for every month that I've been married.

Whoa.

40 fucking pounds.

Do you believe that shit?

How thin were you?

Because you don't look.

I was like 198.

Yeah.

To say that you put on 40 pounds since June,

I would have said, no, that's not possible.

Yeah, you don't think that's not think that at all.

I wish it was June.

It's August.

At least June.

August.

At least June.

I'd be like, well, it's been a while.

That is, that's

depressing.

You step on that scale.

It really is.

Dude, I didn't want to do it.

What are you doing differently?

Well, I think my medication that I switched recently, that had a hand in it.

And probably not moving.

Like, hardly moving at all.

I'm constantly in the house.

Constantly in the house.

Yeah.

And like we would like order DoorDash and shit.

Yeah.

You know, so Mary Beth is going to start cooking more.

Yeah.

I hear you, bro.

I, I'm, I'm, I'm, all that weight that I lost a month ago is back.

And I step on that scale and I hate, I fucking hate myself.

Don't you, though, man?

Yeah.

I look in my closet and I'm like, I literally cannot wear one thing because everything I bought was at my peak physical condition.

You made this.

This is the second time you've made this.

I keep doing it.

And you gave all your fucking big clothes to get them.

Yeah, I gave all my pants.

Get them?

Take those pants off.

I need those pants back.

They were in the basic.

Yeah, so I feel for you, bro.

But you did it once.

I did it.

You'll do it again.

It's the exact amount of weight that I lost the first time.

I gained every fucking ounce back.

Every ounce.

But not at your heaviest, heaviest.

Oh, no, no, no.

Yeah, you're not going to be able to do it.

Since I sent you all of that.

Right.

Yeah.

Like, I was, I weighed 240,

and then I went down to 198, and then I'm fucking back up to 240 now.

What was, what was the, because,

like, if I throw in like an episode of Comic Book Men, like, some of them, you're just, you don't know.

It's insane, isn't it?

It's insane that we let you walk around.

I think the same thing.

I'm just like, how are they, like, not trying to get me into a sideshow or something?

I mean, it's, it's, like, so what was that?

Like, what was that heaviest?

That was, like, at that heaviest, there was, uh, because we do the comic book men podcast.

Yeah.

And so we have to re-watch all the episodes, which I really love, as fat as I am.

But there's one shot from the side where I'm like, this is inexcusable, man.

And at that, I think that weight would have been 305.

Wow.

Yeah.

So 65 pounds heavier than right now.

But we're all wincing while we watch it.

My fucking sideburns are fucking crazy.

Really?

Oh, yeah.

How so?

It looks like I got cockroaches coming down the side of my face.

What does that mean?

Like, no one told me that your sideburns are fucking.

They were too long?

Yeah, they look ridiculous, asshole.

You're the fucking star of the show.

You're the talent.

Nobody's going to come up to you and fucking tell you these things.

I know, but I wish they did.

I mean, you know, because it made me change watching it, made me change

my sideburn fucking.

Your sideburn games.

Sideburn games.

Oh, wow.

That's because to me, you look kind of the same.

You've always looked the same.

Right.

But I think to the outsider, but we all see different things when we watch it because, like, you know, I'm looking, you're like, both you guys are like

crying about weight.

And I'm like,

but I could say it, but no one's going to believe it because, you know, like, you guys look fine.

You know, you guys look

perfectly, perfectly fine and awesome.

I mean, but

I know where you guys are coming from.

No matter what anybody says, you're going to feel that way.

I'm just going to feel it.

Yep.

I feel my gut sticking out over my fucking pants.

It's the worst.

It's the worst.

It's the worst.

I've been wearing sweats for months now.

Months.

Yeah, I know.

Do you know what you're doing?

I've been wearing sweats.

I've been wearing sweats for fucking decades.

Yeah, but like, there's nothing.

In fact, I really like them.

I like wearing my Mac Weldons.

But at the same time, it's like.

But at the same time, I don't want to be forced into them.

I want to wear jeans.

I cannot stand wearing jeans, man.

man I don't care how skinny I got I could not fucking I just can't stand wearing jeans it feels like I'm wearing a straitjacket on my around my waist like I need to have like

stretchable fabric on nice and loose I always liked a good jean yeah no not me man I've never really felt comfortable in jeans see I always feel in jeans ready for action like that's how I feel in swimming yeah maybe so maybe that's just it like I get to take on you need me to fucking mine some coal you got it you need me to like run across a rooftop be some criminal?

Mine some coal.

I got it.

Yeah, you get that.

It's fucking, it's scrubbery.

You know, you're going to go into the fucking bowels of the earth and mine some coal.

I'm not going to do it in sweatpants.

Well, you're not saying that much.

Isn't that when Levi Strauss started during the gold rush?

Yeah, that's why, yeah, it was all that coal mining shit.

Gold mining.

Yeah, so that's the fat news.

And anybody who wants to jump on the diet with me and share

results via Twitter, I'll keep you updated.

Oh, yeah.

If you care.

I don't know if people care.

Did you take a before photo?

Yeah, I take pictures.

I'm going to take just like I did last time.

I take pictures every day.

Okay.

So, you know, I can.

I should have taken pictures as I fucking ballooned up.

It might have stopped you at one point.

I don't know why I did.

Like, I don't know why.

Because I knew.

I'm like, well, this doesn't fit right anymore.

Well, this doesn't fit right anymore.

Yeah, why didn't I just stop?

And it's all fucking Mary Beth's fault.

Damn, straight it is.

I don't even need to hear the reasoning.

Okay, good enough.

Why is it her fault, though?

We should give her her.

Because, like, during the, like, after we got married, then there's the honeymoon.

And she's like, well, just, you know, just eat whatever you want.

You know, like, we're on vacation, blah, blah, blah.

But that's what did it.

Like, it started me back into that bad pattern of, like, I can eat this.

I'm fucking 198 pounds.

I can eat this.

And I'd be the next thing you fucking know

fucking out there shopping for new pants.

Yeah.

It is her fault.

I agree with you.

Yeah.

I noticed when I noticed that my t-shirt was, you know, like when you you got a flat stomach, it just hangs down, but if you got a tummy, like it that like there's a gap,

I started noticing the gap.

I'm like, oh, fucking hell.

I have a fucking T-shirt cap.

I can always feel it in my back, too.

Like my T-shirt will get too tight on my back.

And then you're right.

It'll stick out in the front.

And then I look like everybody that I judge.

You know what, though?

That's good, though.

If that's where all your extra weight goes, is your back.

You got fat back?

I got a little fat back, yeah.

I think that's the best place it can go, though.

You could hide it.

Yeah,

right?

Have you got a fucking hunchback?

No!

Fasimoto.

Yeah, but for a motorcycle, that's not good.

You don't want back fat on the motorcycle.

That's true.

That's the issue.

We're song getting that season.

That's all I wanted to do this summer.

I'd be like, put on some jeans and a fucking wife beater.

Yeah.

Can I still say that?

I'm not even sure.

You know what?

Oh, wait, I'm sorry.

My bad.

Guinea tea.

We had this discussion on Seth the other day, and

I said, I'm not giving it up.

No.

Wife beat her.

Yeah, I won't give it up.

Until they start coming to you, then you'll give it up.

Then I'll give it up immediately.

I just want to give it a try.

Even one tweet.

Just one tweet.

He doesn't even see it as a tweet, he just sees it as dollar shines.

Oh, no.

I don't mean to ever imply that I won't bend over at the fucking moment's notice.

Did I sound like I was trying to be tough?

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to imply that I wouldn't do whatever everybody said was okay.

Before we go, can we go on a high note?

I love

hearing from listeners that I did not think were still even listening anymore.

Like

old fucking school listeners who are like, like a Fitzman?

Yeah.

Whatever fucking happened to Fitzman.

I don't know.

I don't really see him on Twitter that much anymore.

Although, I don't go to Twitter anymore.

That was a fucking loyal listener.

He was like solid.

Yeah.

But

one has resurfaced after not hearing from them for many a year, but

Mike from the Wonder Brothers.

Do you remember the Wonder Brothers?

Shit, Zombie Paters.

Yeah.

They'd hang in the Telm Steve Davidson.

Yeah, we went to their art show down in Houston, right?

Yeah, down in Texas, right?

He is sending me a new painting that's going to hang at the general store called TSD vs.

Satan.

It's an awesome, awesome painting, but it just warmed my heart because he said, I still love and listen to the podcast.

Dude.

Isn't that great?

Yeah.

I love hearing from old school ants like that.

I always wonder, what made them stop?

What did Rice say to them?

Just tell me, I'll tell them not to say it anymore.

Tell him, Steve, Dave.