#439: TESD 3-way

Yeah, I'm just like, I don't really want to get, you know, fucking wet anymore.

Wet

anymore

Little sheep, little lamb, little lamb chop, you know.

I'll cut you.

Tell him, Steve Dave.

First, they postponed Burning Man, and I did not speak out because, really, who cares about a bunch of hippies and pretentious artists and riding bikes naked and all that other shit?

Then they postponed Coachella,

and I gave even less of a shit about that.

Trust fun babies, rich celebrities from LA.

Ooh, let's all put flowers in our hair and use Instagram filters.

And then they postponed the 10th anniversary.

Tell him, Steve Dave.

And that is something that's worth talking about.

Yes, unfortunately,

we have fallen prey to the corona postponement, the corona effect.

The show is going to be postponed for exactly 364 days.

We're looking at June 12th.

2021 to celebrate the Telem Steve Dave 11th anniversary bash, and that seems to make more sense even than us having a 10th anniversary bash.

And the way it works is that

it's postponed.

So, if you have your tickets, you have your tickets.

You're set for next year.

If you do not want to keep your tickets, you can get a refund.

I don't know exactly how you do that, but you know, go to Ticketmaster, what have you.

Other than that, you really don't have to do anything aside from cancel your travel arrangements and your hotels and your Airbnbs and all that stuff, I wanted to be able to tell you as soon as possible so that you can do that while the travel industry is still being a little bit lenient with that sort of thing.

So, of course, it sucks and of course it's beat because now what do I have to look forward to the rest of this year?

Nothing.

I've got nothing to look forward to the rest of this year.

Don't worry.

We'll get through it together.

By that time, we won't have to be wearing masks and I think people won't be as afraid anymore and everyone can have a chance to sort of economically recover from this bullshit and then we'll gather in large groups and maybe we'll give each other a different kind of disease.

I don't know an STD maybe something new some kind of new STD that everyone's like oh my god you have that gross but not deadly just you know stigmatizing hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tellum Steve Dave we've got a perfect triangulation of personalities here for you two in Jersey, one in Staten Island.

Are you awesome or not?

I mean, come on, I'm trying to build some excitement here.

I don't know the angle.

I've never heard you describe it that way before, so I thought you were going somewhere with it.

No, of course not.

I do the light stuff, and then I rely on you two to do the heavy lifting.

Oh, all right.

Pop in with a remark here and there, remind people, like, hey, I'm here too, that kind of thing.

That's funny because

I thought my job was popping in every once in a while.

Speaking of popping in, Walt Flanagan popped in on me today.

What do you mean?

Stopped by my place.

What kind of half-assed social distancing is this?

It was very solid, let me tell you, because he had a sweet Tell him Steve Dave scarf wrapped around his face, as he said he would.

Oh, yeah, he did say that.

Yeah, yeah, I don't really, I didn't really dig when I was.

That was the first time I ever worked, though.

It's just too hot.

It just made me, it just is not comfortable, but I guess those are the

price you have to pay, though.

Well,

it's not really designed as a COVID-19 mask.

So when he says it's too good, I think he's saying sign up to Patreon and get stuff.

I mean, this thing can stop a bullet.

Yeah, it's heavy.

You're not the only person I saw today.

I actually had to go out for one of my first jaunts out into the real world today,

and I had to get my car serviced.

So So I got to see the one and only Sunday Jeff today for the first time in weeks.

So he's part of an essential business, I guess.

Yeah, yeah,

he's deemed essential.

So is his great-grandfather in World War II.

Wow, so how was that?

It was interesting because it was like I didn't miss anything.

I thought I'd miss something.

There's literally nothing.

They made the people who are getting their car serviced, though, though,

wait in a trailer.

They thought that this was, I guess, more safe for whatever reason.

So they rented this trailer, and it's like a trailer that you would have on a,

you know, like the last trailer I was in, it very much reminded me of the reboot set because it was a trailer like that.

Oh, like a honey wagon, right?

That's what they call them, Q, honey wagon, like a small trailer with like a little bathroom and bed.

Yeah, there was no,

go ahead.

No, I was just agreeing with him.

But there, yeah, there was no honey, there was no bathroom or bed, but there was like a TV and a magazine stand and a coffee pot and about 16 chairs.

But I was the only one there for the entire time.

So when I brought my car in,

the mechanic is just like, all right, it'll be about an hour and a half.

And I'm looking around like, why?

There's no one else here.

What were you getting done?

What's getting done again?

Just maintenance.

It said I had to bring it in and get the

oil changed and the and I guess just the maintenance light came on.

Right.

So you got to bring it in.

And an hour and a half I sat in the middle.

Even though on Sunday, Jeff

didn't get the special treatment.

I think that was the quick special treatment.

He's sitting in the trailer monitoring everyone for Corona.

That's his job now.

Yeah, but then nobody else came in.

So I sat in a trailer for an hour and a half watching Bravo.

Oh, that's all like the Andy Cohen-like housewives show, all that stuff, right?

Yeah, there was a whole bunch of drama on these reality shows on, and I was just like, you've got to be fucking kidding me.

And I texted Jeff, and he's like, yeah, I can't come out.

I'm the only one in my department.

I can't leave.

Come out here and change your channel Sunday, Jeff.

Where's my Dar Stay?

Yeah, but that was my big big outing for today you know how did it feel how did it feel three weeks um it was nice to get out and actually do something even as mundane as sitting in a trailer by myself it was just the walls changed a little bit you know the floor walls are different yeah so so it was a bit of uh it was exciting to be out and about a little bit you know and

and just drive a little you know and also you had a destination it's not like all right we're just gonna take a ride to sandy hook and back and not get out of the car.

You know, it's like, oh, like, I have a task at hand, something that needs to be accomplished.

As mundane and as much as it would annoy me if COVID wasn't around.

Yeah.

And then the

people at the dealership where you're getting your car serviced, I walked in because they're doing a whole bunch of construction.

So I walked into their garage.

And you would have thought I walked in with like a fucking flamethrower.

People like jumped up.

They're like, you're not allowed back in here.

You're going to stay back behind that green line.

And I'm like, oh, okay.

We're all in masks.

And people are terrified.

People seem to really care or not care at all.

Yeah.

Like they fall into two categories.

I was just reading about this pastor who is down in

New Orleans, I guess, from Ardi Gras.

He likes the blues and shit.

Now he really has the blues

because he was denouncing it.

He was saying that it's

a bunch of bullshit, mass hysteria.

The media was using the outbreak to hurt President Trump, all that type of stuff.

And

Pastor is now no longer with us.

He's been sent out to pasture, this pastor.

He died.

He died.

Yeah.

Because he was.

Well, he was sending, yeah, he was sending memes on his Facebook page saying, like,

oh, it's like bullshit.

It's not true.

It's It's an overreaction.

And he started to feel unwell when he was in New Orleans, but then, and he tested negative, but then he got some worse symptoms.

And

as he was battling those symptoms, he shared a controversial meme comparing coronavirus deaths to swine flu deaths.

That meme is no longer visible on his Facebook page.

Understandably.

He said that in the comments, he said it believes it's a real issue, but he believes the media is pumping out fear and doing more harm than good.

Well, no, not really.

You should have been afraid, right?

You should be.

You should be afraid.

It seems to me like maybe if he didn't have that attitude, he'd be okay right now.

Yes, he would be.

So, I don't know what to say, bud.

He was concerned about President Trump and his

rep.

Yeah.

Well, maybe he should let President Trump worry about President Trump's rep.

Yeah, or the billions of other people who are worrying about it.

You worry about not getting sick when you have a family, and your daughter is this cute, because now you're leaving her to the wolves.

Little sheep, little lamb, little lamb chop.

You know?

Now look at you.

You're six feet under like a fucking jerk.

Wow.

Yeah.

Like a jerk.

That's right.

This is fun.

Yeah.

Just talking about like the different depths during the week.

Oh, man.

The the um

the uh the people who

I don't understand.

Like there's the religious people who I think are like, will be protected.

There's religious people who then who feel like I might not be protected, but it's the draw is so strong to just have to go to church.

You know, and uh I don't quite understand.

Who you're doing?

Who's crumpling that newspaper?

That's me.

I have to admit that to me.

It's over now.

It's over.

Sorry, I got Benjamin Cat over here.

I'm trying to keep him.

All right.

All right.

Take care, but he should.

I don't want him to me out.

But all right.

Yeah, I don't know, man.

I mean, isn't that what faith and what the church is more like in times like this to like

kind of

feel comforted, feel like you're being looked after type shit?

Um, yes, but not like

because I go to church and because I'm religious, it will magically avoid me.

Like in South Korea, I saw this video of a guy, some pastor, who was like, hey, guys, line up to the congregation.

Line up.

I have this saline spray.

Let me spray it in your mouth.

You're not going to get corona.

Guaranteed.

All right.

So I guess the first fucking person had corona who did it because he's using the same spray nozzle for everyone's everyone's mouth, and they're all lined up like it's a communion.

So it's like put the spray nozzle in this person's mouth and a little spray.

Next person, next person.

26 people get corona.

If that doesn't prove that going to church, it's okay to not go to church for just a little while.

I don't know what does.

Yeah, but you shouldn't even need that to not go.

You should just need the authorities and the experts being like, hey, man, you should have just, who fucking knows?

They dropped the ball.

I don't know, man.

I guess people, I don't know, dude.

Like, I don't know.

I don't know what would drive a person to fucking go to a taxed room with other people at this time.

Like, I just, I can't even wrap my head around it.

I, like, I go for walks in my neighborhood and shit like that.

And like, Walt, when you cross that green line, like, everybody's just, like, crossing streets when they see each other come in and shit like that.

Like, Jesus, this is this is a sane response.

Go to a church, going to any building, packed with people if you don't have to.

that's crazy, man.

That's just fucking nuts.

It's derelict.

I don't know.

It's beyond, dude.

It's crazy.

And now, like, people I know are, like, I've started to hear about people I actually know dying.

People I know, but poor guys in my firehouse, it's almost half a firehouse now at this point, has it?

Like, it's just like fucking like it's it's it's a real fucking issue, man.

Like, I don't understand how people are not taking it seriously.

I just don't.

I don't get it.

Oh, so, so, since, like, we've been doing doing these

phone and tell them Steve Daves, you have now

gotten win that people you know have it because initially a couple weeks ago

you didn't know anybody, right?

But now you do.

I know so many people now that either have it who are affected by it or have lost someone because of it.

Like, I mean, I am living in New York City, so it's like, I guess that's going to be an obvious thing to say, you know what I mean?

Staten Isle.

Yeah, it's not so obvious.

I'm in New York State.

There you go.

So I guess it would be obvious.

I mean, I'm looking at...

Okay.

I don't mean doubt, do you?

But does Jersey have more?

More cases?

No?

No.

In what?

In New York?

Yeah.

No, with the epicenter of the entire fucking United States issue.

Dude, it's fucking so bad.

It's like

it's trying to escape from New York over here.

Yeah, I know that people have been saying they're seeing a lot more homeless people, and this has been nice.

A lot more homeless people hanging out.

And it really sort of highlights how many homeless and or crazy people.

there are out there

yeah because what are they doing they're just wandering around right now they got nowhere to go.

Yeah, and they got nobody to get money from.

Dude, that was so funny.

When I drove into Manhattan last week and

this fucking woman, this fucking crazed street woman comes up to the car and she's like, yo, you got money?

You got a dollar?

I'm looking at her and I'm like,

yo, you got corona?

In the fucking world, do you think I'm rolling down this window and interacting with you right now?

In her world?

Yeah.

And like, then you look at her and I'm like, you know, she's holding up one side of the pants and her ass is sticking out and shit.

And so like, you're just like, oh, man, like, this is, this is a lost person who's not concerned about

Corona at all.

No, it does not occur to them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But,

yeah, but there are, but that's been New York City under de Blasio anyway.

Fucking every week, every month in, month out, the city gets worse and worse under that guy.

Yeah.

Why do you think

this is the comparison they really like to make now?

Coronavirus has now killed more New Jersey residents in 9-11 attacks.

It's killed more New York residents in 9-11 attacks.

It's like, well, of course that's

probably going to be the case.

Like, I don't understand the comparison.

Like, you're talking about one single event in a very isolated,

not isolated, but a very specific area.

versus this could go anywhere.

It is everywhere.

It is everywhere.

So, of course, that was eventually going to happen if it was continuing at this rate, because then it's like, what other benchmarks, I guess?

Hopefully, not the Spanish flu.

Oh, God.

We can't lose a quarter of a million people in this country, they were saying.

Yeah.

That's so many people.

That is a lot of people.

Yeah, that's like, how many people can a football stadium hold, Walt?

Oh,

I believe it's like 100,000

or 60,000, 60,000.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, I think WrestleMania last year was like 75,000 or something like that.

And that was, if I remember correctly.

So four of them filled up with people that are like, damn, I should have listened, or damn, I wish I wasn't old, or damn, I'm unlucky.

Sometimes it's just, you're fucking unlucky.

That's crazy.

Walt, I know that in.

Yeah, I know that you were last week giving serious consideration to doing a little naked cooking, TikTok, and Instagram stuff.

You might want to back off those plans a little.

This Paige Van Zant

with her husband, Austin Vanderford,

they've been sharing their naked adventures while quarantining.

They're getting a little pushback after these nearly nude pictures on Instagram.

Really?

So here are some of the comments.

I'm done, man.

So thirsty for likes and attention, SMH.

I'm so effing sick of this.

Another responded.

Can I just buy the sex tape or what?

One commenter pressed.

So I sent you guys that

picture.

The reference picture.

Did you see it, Walt?

I did.

Appropriate for Instagram?

Like, your girls have Instagram.

Is that something that you're like, ah, that's okay.

I imagine that it's that it's there's probably worse on there, right?

than that?

No.

I had to guess.

No, Instagram's a big, like, no-nudity app.

Oh, really?

Oh, okay.

Oh, so that's kind of as bad as it gets?

This is about as bad as it gets, yeah.

Has it been reported?

Is that true?

Yeah, you're not allowed to have nudity on Instagram.

You can have near-nudity.

You can have close.

How does anybody find out, though, though, is that this has to be reported?

People will report it, or I guess they must have moderators that go through shit, you know?

and then they decide like of course people will report it.

Oh, God.

Why aren't they in church?

Because I'll tell you why, because the fucking hall monitors run the world, the fucking

hall monitors.

They won.

We gave them permission to tell us what to say and what not to say, how to think and how not to think.

And this is now we're in.

Now you can't even see a pair of tits on Instagram.

So I hope everybody's happy.

Yeah,

all in service of making somebody happy that you don't really even care about.

But there are so many.

There are so many other places, though, to find that if that's what you're looking for, though.

It needs to be everywhere, Walt.

I don't understand the anger and the.

There are so

numerous, too many

places where you can find that.

Tens of millions of websites.

By the rules, that the company that owns the fucking the site or whatever you want to call it the pro the app

you can you please just abide by the rules

q won't rest until every website has some level of nudity

just plastered and tits

yeah i think they're uh they're pushing the envelope a little bit these two with these kind of pictures uh i don't know if it looked like a professionally done photo like it didn't look like it looks to me like there that was like taken at a studio or something

Yeah, it does look good.

I mean, it's obviously at their house because there's like a TV and all this shit in the background.

I think it's probably just filters.

You know, they're able to.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

They're able to achieve that effect with a couple filters.

Damn, I've been

putting some filters on our fucking Patreon video so we don't look so fucking flabby and fucking out of shape.

Oh, dude.

No shit, man.

An old.

Oh,

I took a picture with Sage the other day.

I was like,

why did no one tell me I'm this bald?

Why did no one tell me this?

Look at this hairline.

Some friends.

Could you get a filter?

I need a hair filter.

Like a mop top, like the Beatles or some shit.

I don't know.

Yeah, I'm like, God damn.

No, I think the more relatable we stay, the better, guys.

I wouldn't try and

let's not glam up.

It's easy for you to say.

No, it isn't.

I took a picture of you dying your hair.

Right?

I was just thinking the same thing.

He's like, all right, let's just stop it there.

No more improvements on us.

That's the last one.

I dyed my hair because I was bored.

I'm not keeping it.

I just wanted to see what it looks like.

And look at an old picture of you from like two years ago.

Dude, it's fucking nuts.

I can't believe I forgot that I had brown hair.

Like I'm doing it and I'm looking at it.

Like I wake up in the morning and I go and I take a shower, I get dressed, I go to the fucking, you know, the murders or or whatever, and I look at my hair, I'm like, oh, fuck, that's what I used to look like.

Look at that hair, and it makes me sad.

Well, because then

you post the picture, right?

And everyone's like, oh, you look so good.

And it's like, this is what they used to say, right?

My hair was dark.

I haven't heard that in some time.

Oh, my God.

My mother's the worst.

She's like, it looks so good.

You should keep doing it.

It looks so good.

I love the way it looks.

And I'm like, what the fuck, man?

You're making me feel like you're

really bad about myself.

Maybe it's about her.

Like, it makes her feel older if she's like, oh,

my son looks like a grandpa.

You know, what does that make to me?

Well, take it from a guy, from a guy who has regularly done this since in his 30s.

Yeah.

Because

my head went gray really early.

I haven't been able to get a haircut because of what's going on.

And I'm figuring, well, I'm not going to dye my hair just to sit inside the house.

So now my hair has grown this bizarre greenish, brownish color as it was in all the dye from the last time I dyed it is

coming out.

It's just it's just a mess.

I didn't want to say anything.

I thought you had gone swimming in an overly chlorinated pool.

That's exactly what it looks like.

Yeah, I remember a buddy of mine, Renee,

you don't remember Renee Sins, she dyed her hair blue, and then when it washes out, yeah, it goes to green, and then it strips down to no color.

Yeah, that's what I'm in the process of right now.

And what does it come out?

Does it come like gray, like grayish or like streaks of gray?

Well, I never have let it go completely gray since I started back

in the early, late 90s doing it.

So I don't even know.

I won't let it get to that point, though.

I can't, I can't, I can't let myself go go that much, even in this, even at the state, even if the world is going down, or it's going up in flames, I'm going to fucking dye that hair soon.

Let me get one more dye job in,

and then we'll kill ourselves.

I don't think that I could just start, right?

Like, I can't just start dying my hair now.

Like, too many people have seen it for a real year.

You can do whatever the hell you want.

Who cares at this point?

You do what you want, do what makes you feel good.

Yeah.

See, now you're coming around.

I always felt that mine.

Yeah.

Not so much when I'm fucking taking thousands of dollars worth of pills a week.

Then it fucking doesn't apply.

The harmless things like buying your hair rather than slowly poisoning yourself.

All right.

Okay.

Fair point.

Q, I think you could because in time, if you keep it up, in time people will sort of not remember that it was gray.

And then you can get to a point where it's like really embarrassing.

You're like 60, and they're like,

fucking, get the fuck out of here.

Hey, we're almost there.

We're real close.

I saw two things this week.

You know, we were watching Ozark.

Do you watch Ozark Q?

Not yet.

I know I got it.

Real good.

Second season, not so much.

Third season has been really good.

And oh, this is a spoiler, though.

I don't know if people will be upset.

Oh, don't spoil it.

All right.

Yeah, I won't say anything about that one.

But I can spoil this one where we watched,

oh shit, what is it?

The hangover.

I hadn't seen it in a long time.

So we re-watched the hangover, and there's one part where, like, the guys go in to check on their friend, and they're in a hospital talking to a doctor.

And for some reason, there's this old guy getting examined at the same time the guys are trying to talk to the doctor.

And the whole joke about it is the guy is like 80 years old and doesn't really like his, his form, it doesn't look like a human form.

It looks like sort of like a mold, like a plastic mold that was exposed to heat, so it became sort of malformed.

And then they poured him into it.

It's like not a real body.

And I'm like, that dude, I mean, how do you end up looking like that?

Because there are people who look relatively normal into their 80s, like, body-wise.

But this dude, I'm like, not at all.

I'm like, what if that happens to me?

And I'm looking at her and I'm like, when I'm 80, you're going to be like 54 or something.

And it's like, there's no possible way.

I'm letting.

If I look like this guy,

he looks like a toad.

Like, he literally looked like a toad with hair all over his back and face and arms and shit.

So I'm like,

as long as you can still crack the jokes and make her laugh, it doesn't matter.

Yeah, she'll accept that.

I'm telling you.

Right, kid?

It's true.

As long as you can still make her, I mean,

keep her laughing.

She won't even notice, probably.

Well, you know what?

You may be right, because when we first started dating, I was 300 pounds.

Like, I was pretty fat.

So if she was willing to accept that, who knows how low her standards are?

Maybe we've just begun to explore them.

them.

I was

looking up.

This is a thing I was talking to you about earlier while, or mentioning, I saw it online today.

There's something.

Fuck, hold on, let me pull it up because it's going to take a fucking hundred years.

All right.

Here we go.

And I doubt you're familiar with this.

It's something called ASMR.

Autonomous sensory meridian response.

Sometimes auto-sensory meridian response.

It's a tingling sensation that typically begins on your scalp and moves down the back of your neck, right?

Spider senses.

Spider senses, like a tingly, well, they're different things.

I felt, because I saw something about it today and I was like, holy shit, it's so long to read about this stuff.

So I really tried to condense it.

It's the subjective experience of low-grade euphoria characterized by a combination of positive feelings and a distinct static-like tingling sensation to the skin.

A genre of videos which are intended to stimulate ASMR has emerged, of which over 13 million are on YouTube.

And I watch some of these, some of these

videos, and I'll tell you about them in a minute.

Very weird.

So

it says the subjective experience, sensation, and perceptual phenomenon of ASMR is described by some of those susceptible as akin to a mild electrical current or the carbonated bubbles in a glass of champagne.

The the tingles the uh let's see they can't decide whether it's um

uh sexual or non-sexual can you be sexually aroused by it because it's like here are some of the triggers all right and this is where i was thinking about you walt

yeah i think i i think i have this i i have watched some of the i have oh you're aware of this Yeah, yeah, because I use some of them to go to sleep at night.

Really?

The one I was thinking of, I doubt it,

because I know getting your hair cut.

Yeah, yeah, that's the one I use.

I use the buzzers and I put the, I put the, I put the phone right on top of my ear and

I put my night mask on and I hold the night mask over the phone and then I just listen to the buzzers and I'll just fall asleep.

Wait, you have like it's buzzing?

Like it's...

No, like, you know, the electric buzzers that you get your hair when you get your hair cut.

Oh, get the fuck out of here, really?

Yeah,

yeah, I definitely do that.

From time to time, not every night but yeah when i have but there's some nights i'll just i'll just think oh yeah i want to listen to buzzers and i'll just put that on and i'll use my night mask to hold the phone to my to my ear and uh that's all i'll fall asleep and then the girls are like remember when it was just him lying under the bed

i've got it i've i've used it on my ipad like when we tour And we're in like weird hotels every night and stuff like that.

And some of them aren't that quiet.

Like I'll put on like a rain

or something like that on the iPad and play that and fall so sometimes a train like that

like they'll have seven hours of it right

yeah it's just loops you can just loop it all night if you want yep here are some of the

some of them that

the stimuli that can trigger it listening to a softly spoken or whispering voice watching watching someone attentively execute a mundane task such as preparing food no loudly chewing crunching slurping, or biting foods, drinks, or gum.

No.

Receiving personal attention, and that's

like you, Walt, the hair, the buzzers.

Yeah, yeah, that's very relaxing.

Tapping, typically nails onto surfaces such as plastic, wood, and metal.

Hand movements, especially onto one's face.

I guess that's like tickling your face or something.

Certain types of.

Can that be heard, though?

Oh, it doesn't have to necessarily just be heard.

It could be like visual.

Oh, it's visual as well?

Yeah, I guess, yeah.

That's why they have the videos, some of them, I guess,

especially onto one's face.

So I guess the video is of that person doing that onto their own face.

Certain types of music and listening to a person blow or exhale into a microphone.

So if anybody likes that, just listen to any episode with Giddam.

You'll be ready to rock.

He maintains it was you.

He still maintains it was you.

No, I don't sit that close to the mic, so I doubt it was me.

Also, I don't have like

I'm not that fat anymore, so

it wouldn't be me.

Uh,

yeah, do you have any of these, Q?

Like, that you really uh

like Walt has mentioned in the past that the haircutter, because it's like this weird, like, relaxation that uh I guess it just dumps a tiny bit of serotonin into your system or something.

Yeah, I just jerk off.

That's it, uh, that would fall under territory.

Yeah,

talk about self-care.

Yeah.

That's not always an option, though, is it, Q?

He's Q, of course it is.

Who's going to stop him?

I've got some pins on that fucking window.

Surely, like, hotel rooms or something like that.

But the,

but, yeah.

Like I said, I've done the.

No, I don't know.

Boys, turn your heads.

This way.

Look at this.

No, I think that, yeah, like I said, I did the train thing and stuff, shit like that.

You know that game, Civilization?

You ever played that video game?

No.

Civ, they call it.

So this is, it's been around for fucking ever.

And what I find that game, it's like if I'm anywhere and I start playing that game, it's just like the hours melt.

And before you know it, I'm nodding off.

So I guess that too.

Yeah.

Have you searched for that video on YouTube though?

Whatever the soundtrack or whatever the noises are.

I bet you somebody's recorded that game and you can could just listen to it on video.

Oh, you know, actually, I usually shut the sound off and just play silently.

Oh, okay.

All right.

So it's definitely not an audio thing for you.

It's a video show.

No, it's like for that, it's just like a mindless task.

It's like, build the city here, do this.

Don't even think about it.

It doesn't matter.

And then

I feel stress going away and then I just start getting sleepy.

Good game that's SivSIC.

Hmm.

It's that way with TV shows, shows too like a like a tv show you know really well you just kind of put it on and drift off and shit like that kind of yeah yeah golden girls that's good for me to put that on yeah well they think that um you know for people that dig the um

the the the hair the hair stuff anything to do with hair and nails or whatever they think it could go back to uh the evolutionary origins you know like when monkeys are grooming each other and shit so that's oh that makes sense that's why people have, I like the nail thing too, though.

The tapping of the nail thing.

I do like that too.

Yeah, that's also another one of my ones that

somehow is soothing as well.

The cats, when the cats sleep on the bed with me in power, like battle knife, that's like, fuck, man.

That's like a dart to my neck.

Yeah,

what if they shit all over your paperwork?

I mean, that probably has happened.

I just threaten to kill them.

They said Bob Ross

can trigger this in a lot of people because of the visual.

Plus, he speaks so softly that I guess

he does that for quite a few people.

I would imagine, I guarantee you're probably going to hear some people say you can do that to them,

your voice.

I think you have...

I've seen it.

Actually, I know I have.

I've seen it online.

People comment that your voice

has that kind of effect on them, on certain listeners.

Yeah, like hypnotic.

Like, you sound like hair buzzers to me.

I can't take it.

No, I'm not kidding.

I've actually seen that a couple of times, though.

Someone mentioned that, that you have that ability.

You reach those certain

decibels or whatever you want to call it.

Oh, those like low bassy tones.

Yeah, I don't have that ability.

And I haven't heard anybody say q has it yet but

never know i look he has the hair let me have the

jesus christ does he need everything

what the hair i dyed

hey i know you guys have been sticking close to home i've been sticking close to home so what do you do you order stuff online

And that's why you want to get into Persona razors.

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You boys have been using them.

They want a personal experience here.

I have.

I used it this morning.

You did look pretty clean shaven when I saw you.

You did look good.

How the hell could you know?

I have my scarf over my face.

Come on.

We're doing a commercial fucking dummy.

Always the truth teller.

Always the truth teller.

You tell the truth and I lie to back it up.

What a close shave.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

I'm telling you, if Persona, I'm going to have to talk to them.

If they're willing to let me showcase what I shave with their unbelievably sharp razor, I'm willing to do it.

All right.

I have long beards, so I don't normally shave my face that much,

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I will attest to it.

Yeah, in my world, you can put that on Instagram, too.

Yeah.

Oh, see?

Yeah.

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All right.

Now, there's this other thing that

I rabbit holed down with the

ASMR thing, and that's personality traits

of people who, I guess,

do this kind of thing or are more susceptible to this kind of thing.

The big five personality traits known as the five-factor model.

Let's see.

The five factors that will determine your personality, I guess.

These are five broad dimensions.

Openness to experience.

conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism.

All right.

So we can

test each other.

Openness to experience.

Each of the three of us.

So sample items would be, I have excellent ideas.

I am quick to understand things.

I use difficult words.

I am full of ideas.

Those are some of the things that would indicate you're open to experience.

Well.

To me, it feels like the only time anybody wants to talk about open to experience is either it's going to be like drugs.

Or when you were over today, I'm like, take off that scarf, boy.

Come on.

It's a new world.

Just kiss a little.

Yeah, sex or drugs.

Yeah, open to experience.

Well, this is saying a general appreciation for art, emotion, adventure, unusual ideas, imagination, curiosity, and a variety of experience.

They tend when compared to closed people to be more creative and aware of their feelings, and they are more likely to hold unconventional beliefs.

High openness can be perceived as unpredictability or lack of focus.

Oh, high openness.

Oh, okay.

So if you're really open, then you could be unpredictable, lack of focus, more likely to engage in risky behavior or drug taking.

High openness are said to pursue self-actualization specifically by seeking out intense euphoric experiences.

Conversely, those with low openness seek to gain fulfillment through perseverance and are characterized as pragmatic and data-driven, sometimes even perceived to be dogmatic.

So,

Walt, I think we see both of us there.

Q, where do you fall?

I don't know.

I feel according to that one quiz that I could barely understand, I'm guessing that I'm pretty open.

Is that what the end result of this is?

I would say so.

Yeah, I think so.

I know I am.

All right.

Benjamin agrees.

Yeah, I think that uh i would say i'm pretty open to new experiences there you go

i think the older i get though like i just those experiences have to be very specifically managed measured out

yeah i'm just like i don't really want to get you know

wet anymore wet you know yeah i don't want to go white water river rafting i i want to stay clean uh you know

i thought that was an innuendo for something else i thought you were talking about tonight soaked in formaldehyde

Like, I don't really want to deal with too many new people.

So that's an issue.

But yeah, I mean, you know, I guess I'm getting less open as I get older.

That tends to happen, though, right?

Yeah, I think it's natural, right?

Well, also because fewer people want to talk to you about anything, right?

Like the older you get, like, unless like you, people obviously want to talk to you, but the older you get, the less they want to talk to you if you're Joe average, I think, right?

How many old people did you talk to when you were young?

And don't you wish you talked to more?

Oh my god, I so wish I talked to more.

I don't know what the fuck.

The grandparents were alive and right there, and they just sit them down with the microphone and like ask them a billion questions about life.

I don't know what's wrong, Brian.

Are you coming over for dinner?

Sorry, grandma.

When you got a grill like this, we're talking pussy 24/7.

Tell somebody who cares.

What'd you say?

Look at this brown hair, Grandma.

It's never going to go gray like yours, you old rag.

That's probably why grandpa died.

You're gross.

Number two, we got conscientiousness.

I think we're all going to weigh in on the same here.

A tendency to display self-discipline, act dutifully, and strive for achievement against measures or outside expectations and related to the way in which people control, regulate, and direct their impulses.

High conscientiousness is often perceived as being stubborn and focused, where low conscientiousness is associated with flexibility and spontaneity, but can also appear as sloppiness and lack of reliability.

Wow.

I'm not following here.

It feels like

it's either the most extreme or the extreme.

It's like, you know, like it applies to both.

Well, yeah, I mean, if you're highly conscientious, I think that they're like, it's the person is more like you.

Where if they have low conscientiousness, they're kind of more like me.

Like

you're very disciplined.

You're very

like you have a direct vision of things.

You're not given to capriciousness, you know?

So.

What does that mean?

Capriciousness.

Like just folly, like whim, spare the moment type shit, you know?

But okay, so I'm not following, though.

So people who like the ASR can either be

not into that?

Well, no, this is something totally.

This is something.

Oh, it's something different?

Something different that plays in.

And at the end, at the end of this,

we'll figure it out.

Hey, side note.

Just a quick side note.

Do you think that for Patreon, we should do like a Telese Dave

ASRM?

Oh, whatever it is.

Read something or

each of us to do something?

Yeah, we could just like each do like 15 minutes of stuff, and then like we could sprinkle in some like get them breathing.

Yeah, why not?

You know, that's a pretty good idea.

There was

go ahead.

No, I think I, you know, we could put some buzzing clippers in there while Walt's talking.

I think this, I think he's gonna fall away to this.

Yeah, I mean,

there was on the YouTube videos, there's like, oh, it's made for it, and there's a lady who's like, she's sitting behind or standing behind what appears to be like a

like a mannequin head.

And on either side, it's wired up so she can like whisper into either ear.

And

so as she's doing it, I guess the people who are into whispering and are listening to it, you got to listen to it on headphones because it's like this three.

I'm into whispering, too.

Oh, you like that?

What do they have to be whispering?

That's like satanic shit, man.

No, it doesn't.

It could be.

I mean, maybe just like, you know,

it could be anything.

It would actually be more, it'd be more enjoyable if it was just mundane stuff, like, you know, like

just like, you know, just a date.

It wouldn't have to be anything crazy.

You know, why don't you just call Mike and let him talk you to sleep?

He doesn't have to whisper whisper to do that.

He's going to be shouting at the top of his lungs.

Poor bastard.

Where do you find yourself?

You seem conscientious, Q.

I don't know, man.

I think all my successes come from being part of a team.

I think,

yeah, I don't think left to my own devices, any of this would have been achieved.

whatsoever.

Because now, even now, in fucking, like,

I don't do anything.

Like, I don't do anything.

I just work within the framework of what I have.

I don't strive for more.

So

I don't think so.

Yeah, maybe.

Yeah.

I'm like that too, where I'm like, all right, what are we going to do next?

I think my natural state of being is fucking lazy as shit.

And I just don't get to indulge it that often.

Yeah.

This one's a lazy man.

I have no fire.

You guys have a fire in your belly to do anything?

Fire?

Yeah.

It depends.

I guess it depends on like the

working on something for Patreon, and the other day I was super into it.

So like in those moments, I'll get a whole bunch of work done

because it's because it's something I want, like something I'm really into.

But in a general fire, like let me go out there and seize the day and, you know, exploit every opportunity.

I'm just, nah, I don't, I don't, that's for young people

who haven't learned yet.

What about you, Walt Fire?

Yeah, I mean, I don't know.

I mean, it depends on the, I mean, what the achievement.

I mean, I don't think my the achievement, I'm realistic to

understand that the achievement is not going to be something

that's going to be recognized by a hell of a whole hell of a lot of people.

Yeah.

But there are things that I am striving to complete and get done constantly, though.

I feel

because you're working.

Yeah, and because I've gotten the

I've got the means to do it.

I've got the ability to do it.

And I want to do it.

So I'm going to do it then.

Yeah.

I like one of my

go ahead.

Go ahead, Donna.

Go ahead.

I was going to say, one of my favorite moments from any live show we've ever done was that blood spitting.

Because I'm like, this is something he really wanted to do.

And you don't get many chances to spit blood while dressed like a man.

No, no.

So it was like, I was like, that's so cool that he was able to seize on that, you know?

Remember when

the whole front row?

God, after we promised blood.

Like, God, that was in an era pre-corona.

Oh, could you imagine today

spitting blood, especially?

I mean, are we all fucked or is this a good show?

I can't tell.

Those poor ladies in the front, I remember the face.

They were aghast.

She had white pants on, right?

I don't remember, but I just remember the look of horror because I guess they had no idea it was coming.

I felt horrible.

I felt terrible.

At least they got a story, though.

Now they're like, oh, yeah.

After being promised that our clothes wouldn't get ruined.

I had no idea that it would travel as far as it did.

Hey, what are you going to do?

Fucking rock and roll, man.

This is the first time spitting blood, though.

What do you expect?

I mean, I'm sure Gene, when he first spit blood, it didn't go perfect.

Yeah, and I bet you he didn't go to everyone in the front row and be like, guys,

just so you know.

There's two more things here.

Oh, go ahead.

Oh, big difference.

Yeah.

Big difference between getting Gene spitting blood on you and

some guy in a top hat.

Is there, though?

Oh, yeah.

I don't know.

If I walked away with the story, I'd be equally like, what the fuck from either?

Gene, I would think, did it on purpose.

You know?

Well, I mean, I just think

he's in a state.

Like, you know, when you get in that state when you're stopping, he's not to be held accountable.

Yeah, I mean, he's real.

I mean, we were kind of like reserved in the way we spit it.

We just spit it right.

We didn't want to splatter the floor because we knew somebody was going to have to clean it up the stage.

I just did not expect it to explode from that stage on like it did

onto those people who were sitting in the front.

Some cool pictures of all that bloody mist in the air.

Yeah, I wonder if those people still listen, though.

No, not after that night.

They're like, oh, well, that was that.

I never.

I hopefully they still listen, you know, and I still want them to know.

I still feel bad.

And, you know, they got blood on them.

Yeah, I would not hold on to it like you did.

And that comes to the topic of agreeableness.

That's the next trait.

Agreeable individuals value getting along with others.

They are generally considerate, kind, generous, trusting, and trustworthy, helpful, and willing to compromise their interests with others.

They have an optimistic view of human nature.

Disagreeable.

They place self-interest above getting along with others.

They are generally unconcerned with others' well-being and are less likely to extend themselves for other people.

Sometimes their skepticism about others' motives causes them to be suspicious, unfriendly, and uncooperative.

Low agreeableness personalities are often competitive or challenging people, which can be seen as argumentative or untrustworthy.

So, all right.

Think you're agreeable, Walt?

I think so.

I think I fall somewhere in between both, you know, somewhere in the middle.

Yeah, your your self-sacrifice for another person is only going to go so far.

What about you, Q?

Agreeable?

Yeah, I think I'm largely agreeable.

I think I'm funny about it.

I'm disagreeable.

It's not funny.

Oh, I think I'm really agreeable.

I think I'm agreeable.

Yeah.

I think everybody who works with me, I think, would say that I'm agreeable.

Oh, that'll cause no trouble.

Then

the last one is neuroticism.

I mean, I do have a dim view of humanity most of the times.

Right.

So it's a little bit of column A and column B, I guess.

Yeah, so like while you're sort of falling in the middle to top

level.

The last one is neuroticism, which is the tendency to experience negative emotions such as anger, anxiety, or depression.

It is sometimes called emotional instability or is reversed and referred to as emotional stability.

Okay.

That doesn't don't pay any attention to that last part.

Those who score high in neuroticism are emotionally reactive and vulnerable to stress, also tending to be flippant in the way that they express emotion, or likely to interpret ordinary situations as threatening and minor frustrations as hopelessly difficult.

Their negative emotional reactions tend to persist for unusually long periods, which means they're often in a bad mood.

Neuroticism is connected to a pessimistic approach towards work, confidence that work impedes personal relationships, and apparent anxiety linked with work.

All right, wow.

All right.

People who score low are less easily upset, less emotionally reactive, tend to be calm, emotionally stable, and free from persistent negative feelings.

Is that you, Walt?

I don't think so.

No, I would say that that's the opposite.

So if you're scoring low, it means you're not upset that easily.

You're less emotionally reactive to things.

You're calmer.

You're more emotionally stable.

And you don't really have bad feelings.

I think I tend to fall more often than not to score low.

Yeah.

Q,

neurotic?

I don't think so.

Yeah.

It's all good, baby.

It's all good.

Yeah.

You know what else is good?

And I'm actually going to play part of this from last week because the excitement that I saw from Walt Flanagan was

palpable, as they say.

The Raycon earbuds.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I'm using them.

Not right now, not for this phone call, but I'm using them every day now.

These are Raycon earbuds.

And I got to be honest, when I got them, I was like, eh, I'll probably keep using the ones that I'm using.

I'm not even kidding.

When I put these on them, they fit my ear so much better and don't fall out like those white ones that I'm like, I'm just going to wear these.

And they're not noise-canceling, but they're noise,

what do they call it?

I don't know.

It plugs up your ear enough that it's like suppressing or something, you know?

These are the first wireless ones I've ever used.

So this is my first impression of them.

They're phenomenal.

And Walt, we know you like them.

I'm going to play your paintings at the end of this.

Yeah.

I mean, this is the sleekest piece of merch we've ever

pimped on Telm Steve Dave.

This thing, I'm holding it in my hand right now.

The little

bullet case that it comes, that they come in, the little blue case.

I mean, it's

it's designed

to look like the most

high-end, but still affordable earbuds on the market, I think.

I think this company is poised to corner the market on earbuds.

Yeah, these are awesome.

One of the best things

we've ever pushed on top of David Michael.

They're in Meandy's territory.

In Casper, yeah.

So they start out about half the price of other premium wireless earbuds on the market, and they sound just as amazing.

Their newest model, the Everyday E25 earbuds, are their best ones yet with six hours of playtime, seamless Bluetooth pairing, more bass, and a compact design that gives you a nice noise-isolating.

That's the one I was looking for.

Noise-isolating fit.

Raycon's wireless earbuds are so comfortable, perfect for on-the-go listening and taking phone calls.

Please share your experience, which I did.

I sleep with earbuds in.

and I had a couple that like they fall out constantly and go under the bed and all that shit.

These, I slept with them last night, they don't fall out at all.

So, if you want to listen to your AMSR stuff, you know,

yeah, that's the ones, yeah, you're buzzing and stuff.

Yeah, so you could do that.

Could you sleep with them in, Walt?

I've tried.

I haven't used these as a sleep yet because I found that when I lay on my side, then like I'll wake up with sore ears from having them in all night.

Gotcha.

Yes,

so I would, but I haven't used these yet.

So maybe I'll next time we do an ad, I'll see.

I'll try to sleep with them in my overnight with them and see

how my ears fare the next morning.

Let's see.

Unlike some of your other wireless options, Raycon earbuds are both stylish and discreet with no dangling wires or stems.

That's the thing, man.

The no stems.

The stems look so bad.

They look dumb, the stems.

No stems, man.

That's the biggest uh calling card or the drawing card for this because the stems just look like dudes wearing like like

elegant earrings it's like douchewar

i mean it really looks like these elegant earrings from like a yesteryear when when women would wear like long like these big gaudy earrings to like the ball or something it's just really weird when you see the like guys walking around with stems in their ears these you can't even tell

no No, you can't even tell.

Go ahead, Q.

No,

that's what I love about it because I judge people.

You know, the people who walk around and

take them out and just fucking things in all the time.

I judge those people.

I see them.

I'm like, come on, man.

I know exactly.

I think I know exactly who you're talking about, Q.

Good guy, but take the stems out.

I mean, what's up with the stems, bro?

The company was co-founded by Ray J.

I don't know what he's famous for, but anyway,

there are celebrities.

I'm supposed to only pick one, but it's so hard.

Snoop Dogg, Cardi B, Melissa Etheridge, Brandy,

and J.R.

Smith are obsessed with Raycons.

Hey, add Walt Brian Q to the list.

Are they spokespeople for the company?

They said that they're obsessed with them.

I don't know if they're spokespeople, though.

So that would be some fucking sweet company to be involved with.

We couldn't even get in.

If we're like, hey, we're obsessed too.

They're like, good for you.

They're like, I'm sorry, was your name Brandy?

Fuck that's my favorite.

Yeah, Brandy.

Didn't it?

Brandy.

You know what?

Forget it.

Call to action.

All right.

Now's the time to get the latest and greatest from Raycon.

Get 15% off your order at buyraycon.com slash T-ESD.

How much off?

15% off.

15.15.

Yes.

That's buyraycon.com slash T-E-S-D for 15% off.

Raycon wireless earbuds.

Buyraycon.com slash TESD.

All right.

And that's a legit ad.

That's no bullshit right there.

Yeah, no, that really is.

I cannot rave enough about them.

This is a real high-quality piece of merchandise right here.

Well, do your daughters do challenges?

I think, did I ask you this already?

What, like the ice bucket challenge?

Yeah, that kind of challenge.

That sort of stuff.

They're not ones to be prone to

fall into the trends of, you know, like a challenge comes like, you know, takes the internet by storm.

They're, you know, they looked at the green dress to see if it was black or green.

They liked that challenge because that was easy.

I'll do it.

Look at a picture to see what color the dress was.

Right.

But the ice bucket one, uh, that was a bit too much.

Uh, probably, they would not probably uh they didn't want ice on them, they they couldn't get all hyped up for that one.

They need something a little bit more, um, you know, a little bit slower-paced, yeah.

I mean, that that that's good.

I mean,

the uh, some of these challenges, what the fuck, god damn it.

Why are there something so challenging?

Uh, cinnamon challenge, yeah.

People have um come close to dying from from that.

Really?

Oh, yeah.

I guess because you can't eat cinnamon, it does something that'll close up your throat or some shit.

That's why people have a hard time breathing.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah, here are some of the challenges.

The Tide Pod challenge.

We all remember that.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

They didn't get into that.

Good.

They didn't get into Tide Pod.

I was hoping Sage Wood, I could have saved a couple bucks on feeding her, but I don't know.

uh these these challenges where people get out of their car and dance around it uh while a song is playing

the condom challenge

condom challenge walt you you stick a rubber up one no uh nostril deeply in hell and then pull it out the other without biting and puking oh my god why I don't know I don't know 3 a.m.

challenge you wait until 3 a.m.

to incite some poor paranormal activity

all right right, well, that's bullshit.

Hot water challenge,

pouring hot water on other people.

Why?

Why would you?

I'm going to seem even older than I'm already coming off, but like, this shit, we didn't have any of this nonsense

when we were kids.

This is not fun.

It's too much shenanigans and falder.

I agree.

Get off my lawn with that shit.

Yeah, you don't want to hear the cock of a shotgun.

Trust me.

Do you remember challenges, Walt?

Like when we were young?

Like even the jackass stuff.

Like we didn't really, like,

I didn't know anybody who was into like that sort of self-harm, you know?

Well, I mean, are all these challenges harmful, though?

Like, dancing around your car sounds kind of just like fun and goofy.

You know, you just.

I'm sorry, the car's moving.

I forgot to mention that.

Is it really?

Yeah.

What?

Yeah, they'll get out of the car as it's moving and like, because it's like at a very slow roll, like just an idle.

So it'll go only a few miles an hour.

But there are people who are like, I guess they don't realize how to adjust their idle so that the car doesn't go too fast and either run them over or like they'll fly down and get all scraped up, like that kind of shit.

I challenge you to Ms.

Wolf.

Waltz.

I really just thought it was: you stop at a red light, you get out, and you just dance around the car and get back in before the light changes to green.

That sounds a bit safer.

That's what the way, that's the way the challenge should have went.

Why don't you do it?

Like with the girls, just be like, I'm getting into challenges.

We call this one the Chinese fire drill.

Well, yeah, but there were challenges back in the day.

Swallow goldfish, get people jammed into a phone booth.

What 1950s frat were you trying to join

that they've been around since you know since as long as i can remember these challenges so it's not as if this is a new thank you

no you're right you've sold me

you know i mean but always why don't you have to be something bigger

right it always has to be something bigger but why don't we start a challenge of just doing the dance around the car not moving

okay

you know and then

first waltz you got to do the video And then at the end of the video, you go, I challenge Brian Johnson.

And then he does it.

But so you got to do it.

So we're waiting on you.

We're waiting on you to start it.

Okay.

The world's been waiting for you.

Challenge accepted.

The world's been waiting for this one challenge only to introduce a far more tepid version of it.

The other night I was breaking Sage's balls because she's into all this challenge shit.

And I told her, I was like, You got to go to bed.

She's like, Why?

Because she doesn't have school.

I was like, Well, you got to do school work tomorrow, blah, blah, blah, the whole thing.

I said, Hey, how about this?

I said, You don't go to sleep.

I said, I'm going to do the Elsa's wake-up challenge.

And because Elsa's a character in Frozen, and she's like, What's that?

I said,

You're going to be sleeping.

I'm going to dump a bucket of ice water all over you to wake you up.

And then she goes, She goes, Challenge accepted.

She goes,

And then she goes, It's on.

And I go back into the bedroom.

I didn't know Mary Beth could hear all this.

And she was like, What?

Why?

Why would you say that to her?

She's going to do it.

So she's going to do it.

And it's like, we don't always lock the door because sometimes it gets hot in there.

So, you know, we have to open the door.

So now she's

sleeping with one eye open.

She doesn't know what Sagittarius comes in there for ice water and pour it on her.

So I'll let you know how that one goes.

What I do.

That happened to me in the firehouse once.

They woke me up like that with a bucket of ice water.

Can that do something serious to you, like harmful?

It felt at the time like it could.

Yeah, it felt like it was going to kill me.

And then when I saw their faces drop when I woke up, and I was like,

So, this was a new venture on everyone's part.

It's not like one of them was like, here's what's going to happen.

They were like, I wonder what will happen.

It was more like, what could happen?

What's the worst that could happen?

Right, right.

And then that was that.

But, you know,

it started a war.

It's started the war that lasted a year and a half.

So it was good.

It was the right move on their part.

See, that's exactly why I wouldn't want to do it, though.

I'm like, I would rather not do something to someone than have to worry about them doing something to me.

Yeah, but there's a lot of, you know, what a firehouse is, Brian.

You know how, like in the movies, like an angel pops up on one shoulder and a devil pops up on the other one?

Yeah.

A firehouse is like 12 other devils on one shoulder going, do it, do it.

It's fucking funny.

Do it, do it.

There are no angels.

Even the fucking captain's on the other shoulder going, yeah, yeah, do that.

God, I missed that place.

Yeah, that is a.

I was talking recently about that.

I was like, I'll never have a sense of fraternity like that.

You know, like, probably the last thing would have been like a basketball team in high school, but even that.

Well, you can join the men's lodge.

Men's lodge?

Where's that?

Yeah, the elks or something.

Oh, the raccoons.

What do the elks do?

I think they do fundraisers and they do, they raise, try to do things to help the community, though.

But like, I always see these lodges, you know, around town, and I never see anybody going into them.

So they must need members as their members grow old and die off.

I'm sure they're looking for, you know,

youngsters to try to come in and fill the void.

We need some young blood.

We got 80% of our guys got cleared out by by corona.

You can do that,

don't we kind of have that with the four-color demons?

Like, should maybe we should buy or

like a physical clubhouse.

Wait, can you say that one more time?

Yeah, I didn't hear any of that.

What time?

I didn't hear anything.

Maybe we should buy what?

Like a physical clubhouse, like how most people

they have them.

Like, and get it done.

You know what I mean?

Maybe do it on our own.

Four-color fezes?

Yeah, well, sure.

I can't tell you what I hope to see as Patreon merch in the next couple months.

I want a four-color fez so bad.

Do you think

maybe

we could

merge with Ming's studio, Shared Universe, and

make it like a clubhouse slash podcast thing.

Brian, go hang, you can go hang out there.

So, we just take over some of his space.

What are you guys doing here?

What's with the, what's with the pheasants?

I mean, is there at least one for me?

That would be cool.

Did you have a clubhouse when you were young?

Either of you guys?

Yeah, me and Keck built one.

You and Keck built one?

Yeah,

we built it out of like old car, like old car parts and

sheets of wood we found around.

Sucked.

It was fucking spiders, and every time it rained, it never

dried it.

So you guys weren't like a couple of Davy Crocketts where you were like shaping wood and like making it?

No, no.

We're like, get that car hood out of the lake and let's just put it on the roof.

There's advantages to growing up on a garbage dump.

There's always something available that you can

use.

All of Staten Island is one big clubhouse.

It's one big fort.

He lives down the street in the Chevy.

Did you have a clubhouse, Walt?

I did not.

Well, there was forts that, you know, people I hung out with were like, come on, you want to see our fort?

And there would be like, inevitably, in every fort I ever went to, there was one like

total wrinkled, like coverless

ink, the pages all stuck together from being getting wet, like old Playboy in the fort.

There was always somebody had to found like an old ratty-tatty Playboy in the fort.

And they were always down lower scenic, I remember.

Oh, yeah.

And the fort was a lean to at best.

It wasn't really a fort.

It was a couple pieces of plywood.

It was kind of covered.

It wasn't even as good as Q as it doesn't sound like.

There were always those urban legends, though, like people with stashes of porn

in the woods and stuff.

And there was a guy, I remember Mark London, said that he stumbled across one that had some liquor and some porn mags, and he was right.

He actually did find it.

And then he stole it.

And then the two guys who it belonged to found out almost immediately and started threatening him.

Because when you're that young, you're like eighth grade.

You're like, look at this treasure trove.

Who's going to miss it?

And the answer is a guy in like 11th or 12th grade that then wants to fuck you up.

Understandably.

Yeah.

Mary Beth doesn't approve of my fort that I have in the backyard

to lean to with

moldering Playboys.

She can see me from the room.

Brian, stop it.

The neighbors are going to call the police again.

yeah a four-color demon clubhouse man i don't know it sounds sounds like something that would be like fun to just have like not build it and maintain it where could we where would the location be the ideal location q

well if you're saying the stash is going out of business i don't know

100 right

No, well, I mean, the last update on the stash was I had actually had a good talk with Kev, and the plan is, you know, reopen

when

everything is lifted and then when the lease is up in December you know we'll

we'll reevaluate and see you know how much business came back you know after after all the ban all the um isolation stuff was uh lifted and see if you know it if it looks

the outlook is bright or not and then and then just make the decision then so we you know it could be that we may need to uh find it and make our own fort.

Yeah.

One big enough for the poker table.

You know, it doesn't have to be.

I mean, as long as it's as long as no spider and moisture gets in queue,

I think any

place that we put the put our name on would be would be cool.

I think so.

What would be ideal, though?

I'm sure you wouldn't want it in Redbank again.

So like somewhere in between?

I mean, probably get better prices in between, right?

Yeah, like right off 117.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, like, what's in between Staten Island and Red Bank for you, Q?

Uh, where I am, where you're around like the Cheesequakes State Park area, but I don't

know Madwan, yeah.

So Madwan, Hazlitt area,

you're pretty sweet, yeah.

Let's see if there's any abandoned plywood that

I can score.

I wonder what the market will be like after this.

Maybe people want to, they'll be renting stuff out a little cheaper than they normally may.

Yeah, I mean, I'm sure there will be

bargains out there, but I mean, hopefully it won't come to that.

You know, that would be sad if it does.

But, you know,

you have to always, I guess, you know, plan ahead, though, too.

That would be a bummer, man.

I'd be so bummed if this ass closed.

Yeah, dude, that would be crazy.

I mean, I can't even imagine it.

I like to go down there once every 15 days.

You're like, it was my livelihood.

That's why I said it was a bummer.

Not devastating, not a catastrophe.

There you go.

I mean,

I can't not lie and tell you.

I mean, I've been sitting here in quarantine, and I haven't been thinking.

I'm like, oh my God, it's like

if we do, I mean, that last episode we're recording the stash is going to be very emotional.

That last day we close the stash will be even more emotional.

So it'll be,

you know, like I told Kev, I mean, it'll be like when Mary talked, that last episode of Mary Tottenham or when they left the newsroom.

you think how many millions of people

how many millions of people will be watching oh you should like live stream it it is like i mean if it were to happen it is uh the end of an era there's no there's no i mean it's a comic book store in this climate or the climate for the past fucking 10 years staying there as long as it did being uh like a hub of red bank commerce, a destination for people all over the world, and the fucking location of a TV show.

I mean, there's something to be said.

It really is a landmark.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But I'm sure there's going to be a push to do some events there, and hopefully,

you know,

there'll be, still be an interest in people coming down after this is all said and done.

Yeah, I mean, and if it closes, the worst part will be like

some nouveau-rich Rumson housewife will open up some bullshit store where she's like, I'm into like decorative oil lamps, and now it's a fucking oil lamp store.

Oh my god, imagine that.

Nothing will ever come in there.

They'll be able to replace that.

It'll be a long time before people forget that that was the stash before anything else, you know.

Yeah,

who remembers Bobby sucks?

Yeah, that's going to be it.

Like, can you imagine?

Like, that's like the guy who's replacing Tom Brady in New England.

That's what that, the tenant that comes in after the snash will never be able to fill those shoes.

I think once they come in, we organize a boycott just for having the fucking audacity.

Small payment, though.

But wait a minute, unless they say that we can record Tom C Dave's still there

after hours.

That sounds fair.

That's in the rental agreement.

Oh, boy.

Is there anything you're truly afraid of not opening back up?

Like once something opens back up.

I don't understand.

Aside from the statue, I like a restaurant or

any number.

Practical jokers.

You got my concerns.

My life.

Yeah, practical jokers might not.

Who knows?

Yeah, I'm just wondering, like, do you miss anything?

Do you miss a restaurant that much?

Yeah.

Yeah.

i took stacey uh the other day we were texting i was like you know what i would do for a fucking for mexican food right now

like i would just love mexican food right now and not the stuff they deliver like uh no

or something like real stuff yeah like this is i got a i got a couple of mexican places in manhattan that i like going to and it's just like holy fuck because i can make italian like i i i was doing that the other day i made a bunch of sauce and whatnot and and you know i could order a lot of good things around me if I want, but you can't order good Mexican, you just can't.

So, I'm really, really jones in for that.

Yeah,

all right.

What a downer.

Hey, let's not think about let's not think about not eating Mexican food, let's think about hanging around a clubhouse, whether it be the stash or

an old new clubhouse, you know, maybe you bring down a couple of car parts from Staten Island.

Hey, you know what?

If we do end up having to rent someplace, though, the good thing about that is that rent is tax deductible.

That's good stuff.

You know what I'm saying?

That is good news.

So we got that.

There you go, Walt.

We got that.

We got a deduction coming on our tax.

Turn that frown upside down, Walt.

But I'm going to do everything within my power

once this goes back to normal to make sure that hopefully that doesn't happen.

Well, have you considered cutting Gedham's pay?

Or his throat.

You know what?

I feel like I'm going to try to do everything other than

lose any of my friends.

That's not something that I want to explore right off the bat.

Hopefully...

that doesn't happen and we can all just rebound but we'll try to if you have to if you have to let someone go, is there an order that you see it happening?

At the stash?

I mean, well, yeah,

he was last hired.

You know the rest of that sentence, right?

Yeah.

What if the challenge you start is the like, surprise, you're not really fired?

But first, you build it up, like, Mike, I got to talk to you.

Like, you call him,

you know, and

really get him to a point where he's thinking, fuck, I'm done.

And then you're like, psych.

I don't know if those are three challenges.

Did you start smoking weed in the middle of the closet?

No.

Hey, you want to say hi?

Come here.

Say hello.

Say hello.

God damn you.

Oh, you little chicken.

Sage staring at me.

Hey, I was telling Q and Walt about the wake-up challenge where I'm going to pour ice water all over you.

Wake you up.

No, you can't.

Oh, yes, I can.

I cut you on second.

She said, I'll cut you?

Yeah.

She must be hearing all this throat cutting talk.

I cut you a excellent throat.

I cut you.

All right.

Well.

All right, boys.

It's always good to talk, man.

Like, once we're doing it, I'm like, oh, yeah.

Like, you miss it so much.

You just fall into this

mindset of like, this is just what today is going to be because it can't be anything else.

Yeah.

Yeah, this is fun.

Like I said, I would, I would, we should do two episodes a week, man.

Yeah, and I know we're doing some

I Buy Comics soon, right?

Yeah.

That's right.

Yeah, we're rereading the stories.

It's going to be good.

Not all of us.

I promise to go in completely and blindly ignorant, as I do to most situations.

That's my point.

That's how you excel.

Yeah.

Yep.

That's the sixth personality trait that most people don't have.

That I do.

That's why I'm a winner.

Tell them, Steve, Dave.

Oh, we're not doing that.

I thought we had one more ad.

I missed the one ad I was excited to do.

Oh, no, it was Miundi's and the browser.

Wait, what was the other one?

What happened to Blue Chew?

With Blue Chew.

Another couple weeks?

Yeah.

I thought we were doing those EarPod things.

Those are so sweet.

That's coming up.

Oh, do you like them?

oh, my God, these are the best.

Are you using them right now?

No, but

I've never seen it.

I'm not using any ear pods right now, but these are the sleekest, coolest

pods.

Well, we'll talk about that in a future episode at Tom Steve, Dave.

Yeah, that'll hook them until next week.

These earpods, they uh

you got some branded content coming your way.

That's grabbed my attention.

Don't want to talk about Corona?

Got some new ear pods.

Are they called ear pods or earpods?

Are they loud calls themselves?

Probably just ear.

I don't know.

What are they called?

Earbuds.

Raycon?

Yeah.

Raycon.

Earbuds.

Earbuds, yeah.

Raycon earbuds, yeah.

Did you get them, Q?

I got them.

I just set them up yesterday.

I listened to one song with them.

I was like, oh, they sound pretty good.

I love the packaging.

I love the little bullet that comes in.

Yeah, that thing was dope, man.

The charging is pretty futuristic and cool.

Yeah.

I I I was just shocked at that uh you know how I was just shocked that I actually got one of the products that we charged.

You get the meandies.