#383: Mind Effer (Clean Version)

Sometimes the titles are too saucy for my taste.

And I still thought that in their face.

I'm not even kidding.

Somebody, please.

The new album is a good one.

I'm not enjoying anything.

When did it come out?

Somebody.

What the fuck was that?

Oh.

Tell them, Steve, Dave.

Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell'em Steve Dave.

I am here with Brian Quinn.

I am here with Walt Flanagan.

Hello.

The only reason I'm saying this is because, like,

everybody's up.

I don't think it's true, but

every episode is someone's first episode.

Does somebody listen to 383 and that's their first episode, do you think?

In the comic books, that was always the

right, Dave, that they said everybody's comic could be their first.

Yeah, it's true.

But it's true.

You know, it's like.

Yeah, I'll have to apologize

because I just gave away

383 episodes and still

we haven't gotten it down.

But yes, Dave Windorf of of Monster Magnet is here with us.

A rare treat.

Very rare.

It's my pleasure.

Me too, me too.

It's a rare treat for me as well.

Like, so every magnet song is their first song.

Is there any song that you're like, I hope it's not that one?

Because surely we have a hundred episodes.

We're like, I hope that's not the first one I listened to.

I'll take it where I can get it.

Yeah.

I'm a slave to the listener.

I like body surfing the wave.

You know, whatever wave it is, I'll just go with it.

I don't want to be in charge of the wave at all times.

Yeah, but I mean, you know, I make this happen.

I make things, you know, make anything happen.

It's a bunch of shit.

You kind of throw a pebble in the water and

stuff happens, and then you deal with it.

So you think there's a ripple effect that, like, you do something that's going to set other shit in motion, and that's just the way it goes.

Yeah, and then you react to that, and then you

run up and try to change that.

And then you make that same mistake,

you fucking die.

Yeah.

All right.

It's fun to pretend you're in charge.

That I'm good at.

I made that happen.

Well, I mean, as

the guy, as magnet, people would look at you and be like, he must be in charge

of the band.

Like, you're the front man,

you write the lyrics, you write the music.

You do everything.

So people would look at you and be like, he's in charge.

Practically speaking, yeah.

But, I mean, how much is that worth?

And, you know, it's like really in the scheme of things,

not that much.

You know, it's like kind of being a manager of

a Toys R Us or something.

It's like, how happy are those guys?

I'm the manager.

I feel like you're going to die.

I would have thought that would have been the best job in the world.

I think the guy that works for the manager probably has a better time because he has less responsibility and more time to go through the toys.

There you go.

That's why it would have been the best job because you could.

Well, I mean, like, as a kid, man, you know, I mean, surrounded by toys, what could be better than that?

You know, but

as I got older and wiser, most of the time, like, the actual manager himself is kind of pulling his hair out, waiting to get replaced.

It's the guy that's right under him.

He's always the number two and the number three guys that have the most.

So like you're getting them.

Yeah, you basically are the manager of like not a toy store, but like a childhood love.

Right, right.

Yeah.

One of the closest things we have to Toys R Us right now.

Right.

Hey, I guess nobody's happy being a manager of Toys R Us now that they're gone, right, Dave?

I can't believe they're gone.

Or maybe they are happy.

They're like, fucking thank God.

Are they all gone?

I didn't have what it took to say, fuck it, I'm walking away and doing something I actually want to do.

So if you're forced into a situation where like you have to do it, because they're like, we're closing the store.

Yeah.

And your life gets better.

Yeah.

And you're like 55 and there's really no prospects.

Like if I were to go try to get a real job right now, like, can you imagine me going to apply for anything?

I think you're good enough at snowing people, though.

That's true.

You could snow anybody.

I think about that all the time.

It's not a long-term hiring for you.

A long-term would be a good thing.

He's the kind I can.

50 years.

There's no way I live another 50.

So far, so good.

I was thinking about, you know, like, where would I get a job?

The only place I think I would apply would be here.

Yeah.

And then I might not even get that job.

That would be amazing.

All right.

That would be amazing.

Who goes?

Come on.

No, no, not necessarily because Dave, I bet you Dave knows as much about comics as Mike does, but you're not going to tell Dave like you're not going to give him the grunt when you get him.

I don't think it would be amazing for me because I would be so self-conscious.

I'd be telling Dave what to do.

I couldn't even do it.

I couldn't do it.

No, tell me what to goddamn do.

I mean,

you know.

You don't want to hear it in the way that he tells you.

I know the way the world works.

You got to bag these.

I was like, okay.

Yeah.

He does have experience.

Yeah.

I mean, I think we would just wind up because of my, I would be in such awe of working side by side with Dave in a comic book store, I don't think we'd get anything done but just talking about comics.

I could talk at bag pretty goddamn fast.

As fast as Mike.

Faster even.

Faster even.

Faster.

Yeah.

I had that down, man.

I had to run that whole store myself when I did it.

So I was like,

it's tactile.

What was your customer service skills like, though?

We saw them.

There was times when...

Every single time we went in he was just strumming up yeah every single time

and at this point in your life are you willing to just pretend you care well see that that's where the problems come in not willing to can you even do it can you say you like something just because the customer says they like it because i have to I have to say I love the latest Transformers movie I do I do that's true rather than get into an argument and lose a sale I'll be like you're right it was awesome there's no spirited debate no no they won't.

Not at Jay and Bob.

There's no spirited debate.

You are right, because I am wrong.

Yeah.

I am wrong.

It's not that you're right.

It's that I'm wrong.

I go the extra mile.

Look, I do a lot of bullshitting in my job too, Walk.

You know,

great set.

You kids are awesome.

And that's to work.

And I lost all the skill.

I think it would be just a matter of

the pressure cooker building up to

Valtendik just go, you know what?

you know what

you are a fucking mutant like davis it you're a mutant get out and that happened when i worked at the store like that's it i've had it you basically i don't want to talk about spider-man's boots anymore you basically did that while you were here one day i don't know if you remember this but you actually we had a regular customer that you had an argument kind of not an argument that's too strong a word but you had a spirited spirited discussion with and this person never came back because basically you told them that they they were an idiot and

they didn't know what they were talking about.

I don't even know if you remember this.

He was bashing the spirit movie, Frank Miller Spirit movie, and you like tore him, you deconstructed him in front of everybody.

And it was very uncomfortable for me because I was like, oh boy.

This guy buys a lot of stuff.

Dave comes out like once or twice a year.

And this guy's a regular.

Coming there looking through the bargain bin twice a year.

And you mean Nothing to this story.

You destroyed this guy, and we never saw this guy again.

I am so sorry.

That's okay.

I mean, you're Dave Wendorf.

You could do that.

I didn't do it because of that.

No, no,

you were passionate.

I was probably right, too.

No, I didn't.

Definitely.

Definitely.

I think I, you know, I mean,

who's the manager here?

Who's in charge of the manager?

No way, no way.

All things considered.

You were right.

All things considered, we are talking in movies and stuff.

It's a matter of opinion.

And I I don't think I would have gotten into that.

It got personal quick.

You call him a cunt.

You're saying this to 100% believe it.

No, no, I remember it.

Mike will remember it too.

I was looking at Mike and he was looking at me and we're like, is Dave going to just take this guy by the throat at a certain point and throw him out on the curb?

You were that angry at his position that the Spirit movie was

garbage, and

I guess you were defending some of the aspects of it and I think I was defending it's its

its badness I was like I have no you know the spirit movie is you're kind of in a minority on this one in the rest of the world yeah yeah but

I remember this now no this is you ever see the spirit cube no I didn't see it it's the most it's a it's

completely horrible it's like a horrible movie but it's well-intentioned and it's got this

insane bent to it

because it was kind of made by an insane guy, Frank Miller.

I think Frank Miller actually directed that, right?

Yeah, right.

Oh, he was coming off Cin City and they let him do it every one.

So I think I was defending the fact that it was such a genuine piece of madness that it should be looked on it like that and not just a bad movie.

Yeah, I mean, and you had this.

Because it is a genuine piece of like of weird bad cinema.

But the visual of seeing like, you know, Dave, you know, the way he looks and this like little nerdy mousy dude, and it was, it was just like, it was like Tyson versus

Joe.

Come on.

Hey,

Tyson.

Image is like.

He folded like a

foot eight and a half.

This guy couldn't have been that much.

No, I mean, I'm just talking about your knowledge and your ability to

form a sentence

and to just talk about why you like something with such passion and knowledge.

I don't know how we got into it.

I'm going to walk out of this looking really.

No, no.

I totally found it.

I wandered out of my tomb at once.

I was talking about for 15 minutes.

I live four blocks from here, so the image is Lami.

I got a comic store and ripped somebody a new asshole.

Give him school somebody.

You've never done it, you know what?

You've only done it once, and you've never done it again, though.

So I don't know.

I think it may have just been a bad day, or

you just watched the movie and you just wanted to just

be a bad guy.

Yeah.

And I probably did all you guys.

I mean, his money.

Loyalty.

Man, I swear I'll never do it.

No, no, no.

Like I said, it only happened that one time.

And, you know, it's a great story.

I think people like that, though.

Like, I think people, they want to come into the store and do that.

I mean,

maybe not this guy.

Spirited debate is a tradition in the conversation.

Is that a pun like spirited debate about the spirit?

Oh, no, it wasn't.

I should say it wasn't.

Is that a prison tattoo you have?

Which one?

Which one?

This one?

Yeah.

No, that's a T21.

That's trisomy 21 Down syndrome because my kid is Down syndrome.

Okay.

Thanks for reminding me of it.

It's horrible.

That you're going off in camp somewhere.

No, yeah, right.

Yeah, there are a lot of survivors that are like, you don't have the right to wear that.

I'm curious.

You are in charge of things, and we have a big problem with

people stealing from us,

stealing ideas, stealing material.

I think the saying is:

TSD

makes the world takes.

Oh, yes, yes.

Oh, I know where this is going.

So when you find something,

is this a sandbagging?

The worst kind of theft a lot of people would say is

internal theft.

I think so.

I think this is that's where it's headed.

But the last few times you've tried to sandbag me, it hasn't worked out for you.

I think this one's gonna work.

Is this some sort of joke?

This is not a joke, impractical or otherwise.

He's no stranger to sounding like a maniac.

Now I'm going to read three facts about Murray, and you have to tell me which one is true.

Now we play a game called One True Three.

Dave was on the very first episode we played it.

Yeah, you played it with Giddam, right?

You guys did it.

No, no, it was just, it was very early on.

He was the very first episode we introduced that Dave was on.

We didn't call it that at that time, but.

Yeah, a listener came up with that name.

We stole it from him.

We were little kids then, remember?

You were like drinking McDonald's shakes and we were all sitting.

Having meals, yeah.

You were just complimenting us before the mics went hot.

So these are the impractical jokers.

You've probably heard of them.

Am I on them?

That's one of them.

Yeah, there you are.

And

oh, I know what this is.

Yeah.

This is called Two Bonks and a Yonk.

Two Bonks and a Yonk.

And then, in all fairness to Q, when Fatone says that, you see Q's face, like, what?

Yeah.

I did not know what was called.

I didn't know this was coming at all.

I just showed up and they did it.

Okay.

So essentially, yeah, it's a.

It's a one-on-one.

I think I say something in this.

Two bonks.

Very familiar.

One yonk.

got it.

Right there, go back.

Very familiar.

This is very familiar, this game.

Oh, I got it.

So two are fake, one's true.

Got it.

Two bonk, third familiar.

One yump, got it.

See, I call it out.

Here we go.

I have a sticker book full of unicorns.

Okay, so

I agree with you.

What was your feeling, Q?

Did you want to kill the bit?

No.

No, I don't want to kill the bit.

I wanted to preserve future lawsuits.

Let them air it.

We're going to take a legal action.

Who's stealing from who?

I don't see anything.

Everyone steals from us.

Something that arguably we did not make up.

No, I won't have that.

Yeah.

So two bonks and a yonk.

Everyone plays this game, though.

It's two truths and a lie, and you have to try to guess, right?

Yeah, you played this.

So when I saw two bonks and a yonk,

and I saw Q's expression when they brought it up, I was like, that poor bastard.

Wow.

He doesn't know.

He doesn't know what they're about to do.

No, no, no.

I know nothing about Yonks.

And what are the things that you're doing?

So you and your boys,

some of your boys stole and they weren't in the business.

Yeah, I think Joey Fatone stole it.

And after it went down, because I can see you making the stink face on the video.

After it went down, did you mention anything?

No, because

like a true man.

Because you're a boss.

You're one of the four bosses.

Yeah, but you've got to choose your battles.

And I thought this thing that will only air once in the history of television, coming and going, would be a good thing.

Ha ha, that's a great swipe.

I mean,

you can pat somebody on the back for a swipe.

Yeah, just be like, all right,

but you didn't, did you?

I did nothing.

I did nothing.

I stood by and watched it.

The World's Wire Surviving Show discussed.

That's why we're coming for you now.

Well, and that's why you're Survivor and Showbasking.

That's right.

There you go.

Picking the battle.

Take no stands.

Right, right.

Commit to nothing.

It's easier to sit on the fence.

You don't want to be.

It's comfortable.

God forbid you're lying dead on either side of it.

Has anyone ever lifted some of your music?

That's a big thing, people being like, oh, this sounds like this.

I can never hear it.

I don't think my ears are musical enough.

It gets lifted, but it's like I lift.

So, I mean, music is something, and comedy, I expect, too.

But what about Walt's new song, Space Guy?

I would consider that homage.

So people have lifted from you.

Lesser bands, no doubt?

No, like bigger bands.

In the beginning, see, what happens is like there's a

lifting thing, at least it used to go on in radio

when radio was so important that everybody get in on something,

whatever kind of that zeitgeist was, to come in there and suck up whatever zeitgeist is possible.

And some of it's actual homage and some of its lifting.

It really depends on who's, you know, if it gets really bad, you bring it to a judge, you know.

But yeah,

I remember saying to myself, I'm going to swipe a lot, but I'm not going to swipe anything that's like

older than, you know, anything that's younger than 20 years away.

So I swipe from the past all the time.

But when we got signed

and there was a kind of a thing going on, I recognized and then confronted people

about it in a happy way.

I said, did you get that?

And yeah, I was like, Beastie Boys did it for sabotage.

Took from you?

Yeah.

And they're like, yeah,

that's your lick from medicine.

And I was like, I knew it, and I was happy.

It's a great song.

And they didn't swipe it.

It wasn't just, you know, a complete swipe.

It was a little swipe.

That's acceptable, though.

Like, rap guys sample shit all the time.

Well, yeah, it's gone before.

Now it's gone to the point where it's just like, I made that.

There's actually no finesse done with it at all.

But I always considered it a compliment.

That's what we should do.

I mean, the Jokers, taken from telling Steve Dave, it's an honor, right?

Oh, definitely.

I like it.

Look at it like that.

Every time it happens, you should just blow up their feed with it.

Thank you so much for stealing from us.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

It's not too late, still on Twitter.

We're always willing to inspire and provide you with material.

That's what we do here.

When you listen to the Led Zeppelin shit, do you feel like Zeppelin should be paying up for those songs?

Well, those guys, they're like the worst example of it all because it was just no.

I mean, the Stones did it, the Beatles did it, everybody stole.

But Zeppelins stole like wholeheartedly.

They would like go, but Dazed and Confused, you know, they were

touring in 67, I think, with the Yardbirds.

And they went to this club

in New York and saw this guy named Jake Holmes do a song called Dazed and Confused.

And he didn't bother to chunk it.

And they were like, okay, yeah, it's ours now.

now.

Was it a black guy, the original artist?

No, he was just like, you know, some dweeb.

You know, it's kind of like a comedy guy.

It was kind of a comedy song called Daisy Confused.

It had like different lyrics, but there's still the same title and still Daisy Confused, the whole bit.

I've been Daisy Confused for long.

And then, like, I think it was a year and a half later, or two years later, it's like, boom, Daisy Confused, written by Led Zeppelin.

Nothing.

In 2018, we're still seeing the courts still litigate lawsuits against Led Zeppelin.

That band Spirit

just had it thrown out recently.

What was the Zeppelin song in question, though?

Do you know, off hands?

Stairway to Heaven.

It was Stairway to Heaven?

It's the money.

I mean, nobody would bother suing anybody over that stuff unless the stuff was making a continual amount of money.

That's a pretty big heavy stream.

But this many decades later, they're just like, all right, we're going to try to get some money?

Did you think it was a I mean, was there a legitimate argument?

I mean, I listened to it.

They had a YouTube thing.

I listened.

My ear can't hear it.

Not that close.

And that was out of all the swipes that Zeppelin made, that was the one I was surprised went to court because they had a lot worse than that.

I mean, they stole from Willie Dixon completely out.

Jake Holmes completely.

I mean, completely.

Like, this is.

This is mine now.

It's like coming over and like taking your picture and saying, this is, I'm you, you know.

But the tourist one, yeah, that confused me.

I don't know.

Somebody got it in their, be in their bonnet and said, you know something?

Let's go attack the Leviathan and get some money out of it.

You know, did it, but it didn't work, right?

Well, they've got so much money to defend it that they could keep it tied up for a while, I imagine.

Yeah.

Who's that?

Zeppelin, yeah.

Yeah.

I mean,

people care about Zeppelin still.

Like if they did a tour, let's say they use Jason Bond, people go.

Oh, yeah.

Yep.

Is what's his name still alive?

The bassist?

John Paul Jones?

Is he still alive?

I feel like I would go see it.

I think

there's certain acts that transcend time and space, man, and Zeppelin is one of them.

They sold a lot of records back then, too.

I mean, they were a cultural phenomenon.

Anything that's based...

I would think anything that sold a certain amount had any kind of cultural impact that's more than 30 years old now, it's rare as hen's teeth today.

There's been hardly any cultural impact of almost anything since then.

That's all I wanted to ask.

There's less cultural impact of any kind of art.

Art's just flying out and nothing's coming back.

So, I mean, you want the real deal, you're going to have to go back to the time where it was a real deal.

Do you think in the future we'll ever see

an impact like an album like, I don't want to be like Thriller, where it was like, where it just was like everybody.

It was everywhere.

Now music comes out in like something big like that Beyoncé album.

I was in Times Square.

And it had a gigantic billboard for Beyoncé and her husband.

And I guess that's like the biggest thing.

Why were you in Times Square?

I told my daughter to Times Square she wanted to go to Times Square.

To take a picture with fucking Honduran Elmo.

And to me, like she said that's to me.

I don't know what that means.

But yeah, go ahead.

It's a lot of

immigrants dress up as the characters.

Oh, okay.

Hondurian Elmo.

In the pictures, yeah.

It's like off-the-rack costumes.

Yeah, pretty bad costumes, smelly, and then the muscle unit take it.

But yeah, okay, but that's the biggest release, I guess, of the year, and everybody is supposedly talking about it, she tells me.

But I was trying to tell her, it's like, it's pale.

I mean, you came as you use the word pale in comparison to what, like, when we were growing up.

You can't even use it, you can't say pale.

You can't.

You can't, I mean, you can't because she's light-skinned.

Pale doesn't.

I wish

pale doesn't cover it.

It's just not, it's not anything like it.

This is a total manufactured event.

You know, I mean, Beyonce and all these big pop, they manufacture their,

they have to manufacture the impression of some sort of cultural impact.

There is no cultural impact in Beyoncé.

But do you

ever see anything of its ilk ever again on that kind of scale?

I can't see if media is the same as it is now.

I can't see how anyone would even have the time to care.

It's like

it's like a magic act.

Once everybody knows how it's how it's done and everyone's just waiting for the next big thing, how could any next big thing really be the next big thing?

Everything is the next big thing and nothing is the next big thing.

It's just a big flat like a colander of content just streaming out.

People keep waiting for some cultural event to take over.

It already happened.

It's called YouTube.

It's because, you know, it's called people would rather watch a baby pissing on a monkey's head than listen to Beethoven.

You know, they're more interesting.

I think I would too.

I should listen to Beethoven.

Yeah, and I couldn't.

Couldn't you say Beethoven end wise?

That's what I mean.

It's like there's no time for

imagined magic to happen in someone's head.

And that's what all that stuff was.

That we listened to when we were kids.

And before that, it was imagined magic brought on by our and obviously really, really good music, and actually had a cultural impact because media was slower at the time.

So there was more

and we had a lot more

old school taboos that had to be broken.

You know, guys with long hair, rock and roll, sex between teenagers.

That stuff wasn't talked about in the 50s and 40s and 30s.

And before it wasn't talked about, so it was a big deal.

Rock and roll is pretty much a

and that whole mentality is a product of

what was then a new way of looking at things.

And now that that new way is

over, it's long over.

Can you point to the date you're like you can say we can look at this date this year as it's over?

The day the music died.

No, I wish, I wish, you know, I wish you could because.

Is it the day that they introduced the home computer?

Yeah, why not?

No.

So the 90s?

The 90s killed everybody?

No,

broadband.

When broadband hit.

When everyone got it.

I think that's when the magic died.

A new kind of magic was invented, but it's not nearly as fun as

when people almost hold themselves

in a state of suspended

disbelief because they really don't know how it's going to work out.

imagine things they have the time to listen to music and wonder what it means and only talk about it to people

who know that and people who they know.

I mean, physically talk.

They can't research anything.

It's like there's a lot of time for that stuff to hit you and then boil up in your own imagination.

Go, this is the greatest thing I've ever heard.

There's no one to knock it down right in front of your face at every second.

You are like a spirit.

I've got something better than you.

You know, now it's just like, it's hard.

Yeah.

It's hard.

I mean, kids can still do it.

But,

I mean, well, kids, because they're brand new, they can still be absolutely sure that there's magic happening.

They haven't.

What are you talking about?

Kids, we're talking under.

Well, that's what I was just about to say.

What's a kid now?

I mean, 12.

Legally, I'll tell you.

It's like, man, it's hard.

I mean, like, kids get,

it's hard for them.

So now we have this, like, strange tween thing

that is thinking.

I mean, the whole tween thing is, is that's not the tweens I went to school with.

That's not the tween I was.

You know what I mean?

I mean, when I was a tween, I was still a kid.

Now these people are like some other mutant breed.

Too smart for their own good?

Or too dumb?

No, I think they're just under a giant blanket of information.

Could you please fit it into one of Walt's boxes, please?

Too smart, too smart, and too dumb.

I don't know what's going going to happen.

I don't know if you can.

You can sit assault a drug, please.

If we work together day by day, all I would do is just sit

at your side just listening to this.

And I don't think I would do anything but just listen to Dave.

We would talk a lot.

I'd do it every time because I love talking to you.

I love Tuscany.

You always get me on a tender and like, what the hell is that?

Okay.

I'm sure you don't, you know what?

Not to mention like fighting over George Tusker or something like that.

You still don't like George Tusker?

No.

I did bring up the fact that that time that you came in and kind of

I painted you in kind of a bad light, but I'll paint you in a good light.

I still talk about it to this day.

You probably don't remember it, just like the fight.

My two kids were here.

I had to watch them one of the rare times.

And you were in, and

I told them, I was in the back.

I was like, that guy right there up there, he's a musician, he's a rock star.

And unprompted, you came back and my girls were sitting here and they go, you just said to them, I don't know if you know this, but your dad's really cool.

And I still thought that in their face.

It was like 15 years ago, and I'm like, and I, and I, now I can show you.

So you are cool.

Well, I mean, but they don't.

But now that I had, I had validation.

I had somebody that they were like, you know, like was famous and who was.

But to them, it was like, it was like,

even though they didn't know who you were, I was able to show them like pictures and like albums and music.

That was like a weekend of like, dad's cool.

Oh, wow.

Well, it didn't last long.

But I still don't know.

You just had a weekend.

Yeah, but I still bring it up to them when they say that I'm like, I'm not cool or that I'm not.

Like I was four.

I don't know.

Do you think if I tried it again and like left it on a message machine, it probably wouldn't have as much.

I don't know.

I just screwed it.

I don't know if you remember me.

I'm that old guy.

Your father's still cool.

Well, you mean you look different than

any guy that

they had come into contact with.

have, well, I guess.

He looks like a rock star.

Yeah, you look so.

It meant it was so much more impactful than like Bry or Q saying it.

You know, it was like, not because they didn't.

I've never said it won't.

I know.

But like, you look the part and everybody.

Everybody goes under the bus here, don't they?

Like, you know, it was as if Jagger had come in and said it.

Not to them, they wouldn't care either for Jagger.

Who would it be?

What?

To you?

Who would it be to them?

To them, I guess it would be like if

at that point, like Drake and one of the Drake and Josh kids.

No way.

Drake Bell, yeah, if Drake Bell.

Wait, wait, we're talking musicians here.

He's a musician.

He played the game.

Are you talking Drake, the actual RB guy?

No, no, no.

I'm talking about the TV show Nicola.

I did not know they were so excited by Drake because I was just at a con with him.

That would have gotten a picture.

You know, at that point, when he said this, they

would have been something that, like, it would have been the equivalent of, like, the Drake kid from the TV show come in and telling them that their dad was.

But today, who would have had to do that?

Oh, today, it would be some unknown singer that, like, you know, they're into these singers that no one's ever heard of, which is, you know, better than the homogenized.

Yeah, well, that, yeah, that's just

going to ask you.

Yeah, that's true.

They find their own singers.

It's a YouTube thing.

Yeah.

You find your own singers.

And it's very community-minded as well, though.

It's like there's a whole backstory.

There's a whole backstory to this, and it's very manufactured.

It's the new way to get hot if you're a singer.

To go on YouTube?

Yeah.

Well, to run it as if you're a YouTuber.

Like it used to be the thing.

It's like, you know, if you're going to run, you go right to the record company, you know, get signed and let them build you.

But the kids are like savvy on cred.

So what you do is you play it that way.

You play it like, hey, nobody knows me.

Meanwhile, everybody knows you, but

not your mom and dad.

It's this constant fight to have something of yours that not everybody else knows about.

It's the same old teenage thing.

You just built it that way.

And they're actually pretty well-funded, these guys.

They say they play it poor, but

it's not.

How did you get your music played at first?

Like when you went on, like when you first started out and you first were played on the radio, was it a record company?

Like, I want to hear some stories about like mafiosos like roughing people up

or payola.

Yeah.

Little payola.

Wet beaks.

Yeah.

Wet beaks, yeah.

Wet my beak.

Beaks dripping with light.

I wish I had mafia stories.

It would have been interesting.

I was signed to A ⁇ M records

after a bunch of independent records.

Nobody got paid until I think,

you know, I was on A ⁇ M and I know there was some sort of payola in advertising, but they had cracked down on all that stuff by the time I got signed.

There was a big scandal in the 60s and 70s.

Well, did you watch vinyl on HBO?

A little.

It was kind of terrible.

You thought it was terrible?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Did you think it was not representative of what it was?

No, I mean, they got so many things wrong that it kind of turned me off.

So I didn't make it to the.

I mean, I'm sure the story was okay.

Yeah, they didn't renew it for a second season.

What was your, do you remember your first live performance on how old you were and if it were at a pool club by any chance?

Yeah, I remember my first live performance was at

Shrewsbury Public School

on 35 up there.

It's like this little red brick building.

It could have been like 1955.

I mean, the building itself was probably built in 1901, but it looked like something out of like Back to the Future, you know, with that kind of dance.

Three sets, you know, something like original music, or you doing like a combination of original and covers.

What was one of the covers?

Deuce.

Deuce.

Deuce.

Okay, so it's not 1955 then.

Nah, nah.

It was like 1950.

I was like, I think it was 1970.

That was awesome.

1970.

90.

That's what he knows all about the 30s.

1975.

So we did like Kiss

and Rush,

Alice Cooper, Black Sabbath, Lou Reed, some Iggy and the Stooges, which was daring, you know,

that kind of stuff.

And we just kept doing it.

How would you rate your performance that first time?

Terrified.

But like, did you feel like confident?

Yeah, I think I sang okay.

So, you sit there.

So, it didn't sound like you had a punctured eardrum and a head cold.

No, I think it's okay.

I kind of sang, like, I could sing those songs.

I could stay on key.

I don't know how nuanced it was, but you know,

I knew when I was off key.

How old were you?

Probably like 17, maybe

a couple years ago.

17 or 17.

The second one was the best because I was at a house party in Shrewsbury where I took LSD.

Okay.

And then while you played?

Yeah, it was a big mistake.

Oh, wow.

Why?

Because I felt outside of my being and I was separated from reality and I think I was trapped on the ninth circle of fault.

And

that happened to you often?

Yeah, you know, I could view myself from a high distance looking down, you know, and saw my vocal cords, my vocal emonitions coming out like that looked like fish.

It was insane.

It was, you know.

How do you think you did like when you were were watching yourself as a spectator?

You know, I did really put it

in a showbiz kind of bracket at that point.

I was just trying to maintain the last stem of my sanity.

It was really insane.

I mean, I didn't know where I was.

I mean, I knew where I was, but LSD is weird, you know.

And it's not like anything else.

So I just kind of waited for it to be over,

and it was.

How long did that take?

I think about eight eight hours oh gosh we we did mushrooms once remember and i and i was like throwing up for the first four hours i'm watching tv by myself

this is a long you know it was a long time ago yeah like yeah i would once you settled down it was awesome i wasn't a stranger to tripping at that point but being in front of people

and that was i was a real stranger too and i what i was thinking i knew it was not a good idea to do but

i'll do it anyway that's well that was a good thing back then it was like yeah you know it's like take the plunge the whole thing was like if you're not supposed to do it do it it's very highly encouraged LSD care no no no you're a lot better off am I because

I hear not I've heard micro dosing LSD is the way to go the uh the I got some comedian friends in LA who give it to me and I never take it because I just feel with my age and I just haven't done it up until now.

So what am I going to do?

Start doing it.

I'm not a big drug guy to begin with.

But I always do, it's one of the the things I always kind of regret

having not done.

I don't know.

You regret it, huh?

I don't think the 21st century is a good time to take

psychedelic

on the cruise, baby.

2019, me and you.

What does acid look like?

What is it, a little pill?

Well, it comes in many forms, Walt.

Actually, LSP is originally a powder made into a liquid.

Sometimes a liquid can be dripped onto sugar cubes, sometimes made into a tablet, and sometimes dripped on little blotter paper.

That's what I took away.

Is it possible that there are people out there that can take drugs and have absolutely no,

like, it doesn't affect them at all no matter what happens?

You mean they just won't get high?

They're immune to it, yeah.

They won't get high?

Or maybe they were smoking shitty weed in 1987?

No, no.

I think on my graduation,

on my graduation, like they, I remember Ed and Matt gave me, said, and said it was that, and I took it.

So it was LSD?

And nothing happened.

You took it, nothing happened to me.

Nothing happened to me.

Graduation ain't nothing.

Did something happen to them?

I don't know.

I smoke pot.

Nothing has ever happened.

I haven't done it since like, you know, since the 80s, but nothing ever happened to me.

I mean, alcohol affected me, but not.

I think they just gave you shitty stuff.

It's not impossible that

my makeup is.

It could be your makeup is strong.

And if you're talking, go with that.

But you know what else, too?

It's like

you're just just so stubborn that you just wouldn't allow it.

You're like, you can't.

Is it possible like it, like, I was, that's just that.

I'm like, I'm not going to let it happen.

I'm going to blind over.

If you can do that, you should be like the leader of the free world.

I will not let that.

Because LSD is not getting any further than my cerebellum.

That's where it parks.

It's going to park there.

It's not getting into the medulla.

I feel like a lot of drugs are not like, no, no, no, you don't.

But I remember the other guys I was with, the two guys I was with, acting all like

acting like, like, yeah, and I'm like,

I don't fucking want because nothing, I don't smell anything.

You know, I mean,

the way it was taught to me

back in the olden days was that sometimes it took, unless you were going to do a massive amount, it took a little while for it to get in there.

And it's like with pot, like a lot of people didn't get high the first time.

You had to smoke it a couple times and then it came in.

Really?

Yes.

Okay, so I only

twice.

And it never did anything, and it just smelled gross, and I just.

So right now, you're a little,

what's the word I'm looking for, Q, stodgy?

As far as trying new shit.

Let's say we're like

trying to protect his sanity, right?

Hey, you big pussy.

Well, let's say, let's say you don't want to take acid colour.

Sissy.

Let's say we're going to take a look at that.

We're in the nursing home together.

It's me and you.

And I'm like, hey, man, I got some LSD.

At what point would you be like, fuck it, why not?

I'd highly advise against it unless you're like out in nature or something.

There's just too much information.

I mean, LSD is like a very powerful, powerful drug.

It affects the id.

It affects your id, your inner core.

You know, you look at yourself, you stand in front of some people known to stand in front of the mirror and just like, what am I?

I don't need a lot of stuff.

It's not just

like

you take this stuff and see flowers and stuff.

It's like, it's your being.

It could go very, very wrong back then.

All I could do is expect it to go very, very wrong today.

There's just too much to do.

An 80-year-old, I can't imagine, would have the,

would it do four to four?

No, I would think it was just a matter of where your headspace was at.

You know, good trip, bad trip.

So if you were in a good headspace, you'd probably have a great time.

I mean, there'd be moments, like any adventure, there's moments, there's scary moments.

That was part of the...

the appeal of an LSD trip was that there were scary moments, but it was quite awesome, you know, crazy.

But I just, I mean, today,

I think there's so much information that I don't know if anybody's in that good of a headspace.

I don't think you can naturally, I mean, if you pay attention to and read all this stuff that's coming in at all times, I mean, if you want to pay attention to the news or anything like the news,

and you want to care, and you want to, like, you really, really care.

There's just so much information.

Then again, I could see a couple, you know, mutants watching Game of Thrones, and that's all they watch, and they'd be fine with LSD.

They'd be like, oh, we're going to binge watch Game of Thrones.

I don't care about it.

They'd probably be fine.

Do they have to do it?

That sounds alright.

There are other seasons where they showed all these tits.

Yeah, they do.

They still do.

Yeah, I don't know how many people do it, but enough people say that.

It sounds like an answer.

Every time in LA, somebody gives me some

antiquated.

Yeah, drug, right?

It's not the drug of choice anymore, right?

Or if it ever was.

No, I mean, it's, yeah, I hope that

is the high different from mushrooms because I I hallucinated really hard on mushrooms.

Yeah, mushrooms is

mellower than LSD.

LSD is like a break.

We create a torroxity.

It's just more.

LSD is more of that.

Yeah.

Are mushrooms illegal or

is they illegal?

It's illegal.

But isn't it just come from a can?

No, it comes from a grand can.

You don't go to the food store and get it.

No,

it's a type of mushroom.

Oh, right.

But don't they just like ferment the can, like the ones they buy in the store and no, no, no.

It's a specific type of mushroom.

It's a different kind of mushroom.

It's psilocybin.

surely you've got to be one of these guys that's like what the fuck it's a mushroom what the fuck it's weed like come on already i read asbury park press i was on the bagel store the other day and i saw the the headline was new jersey has more busts for weed than any other state yeah that's crazy and that's yeah monmouth county being the high uh highest or second highest i thought it was the criminal counties it's just weird like i think they want to give tickets they want to generate revenue and shit

and it's a whole thing there's a long history of a law and order stance taken by governor after governor after governor.

That'll break like a twig.

You watch.

And in the course of like two years, it could go and all of a sudden it's legal and nobody cares.

I mean, it's been waiting to happen.

When that's all people care about.

It's also strange.

Like we were just in California where you can go to a store and buy any number of people.

They're like a deli.

Yes.

And just order shit up.

It's the future of the whole country.

But then you cross the border into another state and it's like, now you're in trouble.

Yeah.

Well, California is the future of the whole country.

It's not necessarily a good thing that everybody wants to just be high all of it.

I mean, I don't get high.

No, you don't do anything.

What's your advice now?

What's your

drink?

Beer?

No.

I don't drink.

Little mess.

I don't smoke.

You really could work together.

We, I mean, we would have.

How do you feel about a regular?

I smoke cigarettes.

That's what I'm saying.

That's my message.

We can work on that.

We can get you off that.

Well, what's he on?

Pepper?

Cigarettes.

Just run outside and smoke and come back and be like.

Get your patch.

Yeah.

Get your right patch.

I'm trying to i'm break i'm helping get him break out drinking

how's that going yeah he's he's cutting down on his drinking yeah

so you know working here is is a would be it would be so it's better than a rehub

mike's been sober for 20 years i don't like getting high i don't like getting you know i don't like it i mean and then you know and i didn't get high for the longest time i mean i stopped getting high and drinking when i was around 24

and

went the whole time in monster man except for a couple times where i just decided to see what it was like to go absolutely fucking crazy in a rock band and get as high as I could, which was really fun, but impractical.

Oh, yeah.

And

then out of nowhere, when I was like 48, I got addicted to prescription drugs.

What kind of loser does that?

Oh, my God.

I know.

It's really embarrassing.

It wasn't even like,

look at me, I'm high.

I was just like gobbling these pills, giving them.

Who were you, Brian?

I was a young man of 42, I think.

So, yeah, I was about the same age, yeah.

There's something always waiting.

That's when life gets hard.

That's when life does get hard.

Yeah, I'm at 42 now, and it's interesting.

It's right in that zone where you start to consider things that you would never consider.

I'm going to fuck that.

I'm going to make consideration.

It's a statement.

I'm going to fucking know exactly what that is.

I got hooked up.

You just had like a

slip the armpit of a skirt.

I went to, I was touring like a madman.

What is that?

And I couldn't sleep

because I was too excited about what I was doing.

I loved

the whole thing.

I loved touring.

I loved chasing girls.

I loved everything about it.

And I didn't get high, so I had a lot of energy.

And I was healthy, aside from cigarette smoking, but I like road, you know, any time off.

I was riding my bike, and I always did my push-ups and stuff.

I was, you know, considering, all things considered, a pretty healthy guy.

But

my thoughts,

my enthusiasm was just too much for that.

I just couldn't calm down.

Like I would do a show and then I would just stay up all night and like chase girls around.

I mean, you know, what else is there to do?

You know, I'm in exciting places.

There's new people, met new people, had fun.

And I would just talk and talk and talk, and my voice would go out and it would be nothing.

So

but my whole reason for being

out there to be able to do all this stuff was being ruined by the fact that I was enjoying it.

I was like, you just

you're, I was burning myself,

you know, just burning candles at both ends, even without any drugs.

So, you're saying that you were having so much fun you felt guilty and that you shouldn't do it?

No, I was having so much fun that I would wear the voice out.

Oh, okay.

You know, so you're rapping to the leaves, it takes a a lot out of it.

Come on, do it.

Do it.

No,

you know, come on.

No, it's just blabbing.

Just blabbing.

Wait a minute.

You're not talking about singing.

You're just talking literally, you just talk too much.

It was, yeah, the singing and the talking and the staying awake.

That's the only singing.

That happened to me last week when my throat was like that.

That was just from talking.

It's just talking is the worst, man.

Talking will,

and then you have to sing on top of that.

So, and really what it came down to to sleep.

I would sleep four to five hours a night, and that was it.

And you do that for like six months in a row, and you're shot.

I was just shot.

I was like,

could I still talk?

Sure.

Could I sing?

Yeah, but it sounded like that.

It sounded horrible.

And I was like, this is, this is it.

I'm going to ruin myself.

I'm going to ruin.

I didn't care about my body.

I was like, I'm going to ruin the whole thing.

I'm going to bring the circus down.

I love the circus, you know, that the things that excited me about it

are still exciting to me today and then I realized that I got to do something about this so I guess I could have gone a bunch of different ways one I could like

work on my sleep and go to you know a sleep doctor and I went to a sleep doctor and the guy is like just go to sleep

well thanks a lot

obviously even you know have a drink and I was like no I don't drink I don't want to drink

The doctor recommended alcohol.

The guy said maybe you have a couple glasses of wine.

So a wine spritzer.

And of course, I tried it, but it didn't work.

It wasn't enough.

I was still too into it, as into it as I could be, and I couldn't figure out what to do.

So I was like, well, better living through chemistry.

And I went to a doctor,

like a GP,

and said, all right, here's my problem.

I tore all, I go into different time zones.

That had a lot to do with it, too.

I went to different time zones all the time.

So I was in a constant state of jet lag.

And I was so alive that I didn't know, my body didn't know what time to sleep.

I need something to, I was like, I need something to put me down like a wild animal.

You know, I want to go down for seven hours a night.

That's what I'm.

That's why he took that propofolio every day.

That's exactly why he took it.

And I totally get it.

You know, you looked into that?

No, they didn't have that, but I mean, I totally get why he took it.

You know, and I could see how I could go that far.

Because once you start to have it, I was going to put you under for surgery.

Yeah, yeah.

I would have got that.

Anesthesia.

Anyway, so I went to this guy and he's like, Here, take these.

He goes, This is what airplane pilots and basketball players take.

What year is it?

Why he mentioned basketball players?

This was in the early 90s.

Okay.

And this is in the first days.

It was when it was just being introduced, that stuff.

It was called Tama.

It's called Tamazepam.

It's the stuff they make.

It's an anti-anxiety medication.

It's like a benzo.

It's a bit of benzo.

But the tamazepam is a massive dose of benzo that's created to go into your system within 10 minutes and to basically leave.

I mean, as far as benzos can really leave, but basically the high will be over within seven hours.

So you're not walking around high, you know.

And that's all I wanted.

And he got the stuff, and it's the stuff they give to like psycho patients.

He's like basketball players anyway.

Yeah, I'm a basketball player, too.

I don't know why he brought that up.

I think he thought it would impress me.

He's in jail now, by the way.

The doctor?

Yeah.

Wow.

Oxies, benzos, the whole bit.

And this was the beginning of those days.

This is when

this whole Oxie thing started and this whole like crazy doctor prescribing

comfort meds, pain meds, like crazy.

The FDA didn't do anything about it.

Now we're in the state now.

So I took them because they were fantastic.

And I never went over the prescription.

They were fine.

They were extremely powerful and they didn't interrupt with my the painkillers.

No, not the painkillers but the benzos.

They didn't seem to affect my life at all until

they did.

Until you tried to stop taking them.

I tried to stop taking them and my

horrible.

It just turned me into another person.

When I went to rehab, they said the most difficult substance to get off of are it's benzos.

Most people are that's what they're there for.

which i i i could never get into them like xanax and shit because it just always made me tired i didn't like feeling tired all the time exactly but they didn't make me tired because i was so hopped up on doing what i was doing yeah that it just it really actually it was the perfect drug for me i felt i felt a little goofy i went to sleep i woke up had a cup of coffee i didn't feel tired i felt really good like ready to go I mean, I got everything done.

I went on a million tours and wrote albums and did everything.

And nothing seemed to

it affect me in any other way.

Now that I look back, it probably did.

Probably impaired my judgment.

I was going to say, will this taint your love of Monster Magnet music knowing now?

No, I assume that all the artists that

I admire and listen to are,

that's the only way they can do what they're doing, maybe.

So when you listen to Tellum Steve David, you hear me talking.

What albums did you write on when you were hopped up?

I was never hopped up when I wrote anything.

I always wrote when you were hopped up.

No, I never wrote when I was high.

It was right in the morning when I'm a cup of coffee, you know?

At your worst stage, what album did you write?

The album I put together on the withdrawal was For Ray Diablo.

But I never wrote anything.

The only things I ever wrote high in my life never made it onto a record because they were so horrible.

So you couldn't even use the experience to

write a song or to like.

No, no, it's completely the opposite.

No, this was all I wanted to do.

That's why it's such an embarrassing addiction.

There was none of the glamour to it.

I mean, I couldn't even pretend I was Charlie Parker, like shooting up heroin and then blowing cool

at Birdland at 58.

This was just like the guy wants to go to sleep because he has a hard day at the songwriting factory tomorrow.

That's basically

that's what it was.

I'll tell you what.

There was no joy.

He has has a hard day podcasting.

Yeah, yeah.

I think that

on a random weekday.

On a random weekday.

Gotta go to the podcasting factor.

47 weeks out of the year.

Boy, that's being kind, 47.

Thank you, Cure.

Can I ask you about your new album?

I'm on my third job today.

Somebody shoot me.

Somebody just please shoot me.

I'm not even kidding.

Somebody please shoot me.

The new album comes.

I'm not doing anything.

When did it come out?

Somebody.

Pretty recently, right?

Yeah.

Five months ago?

How do you know?

No, less.

Feelings.

Tell me about it.

Four months ago.

Four months ago.

I have some questions here that I came up with, and I also

asked the listeners to come up with some

questions for you, some people who listen to us and who are also.

You know, you look insane now, right?

Those jewelers glasses.

You know what you look like, right?

With this stuff wrapped around your ear, like wires coming out of your head and

crazy, like

jewelers' glasses, right?

These are dial vision glasses.

You see them on scene on TV.

So you dial in

as you're.

No!

Yeah.

Well, let me see those things.

Oh, for like.

Oh, I need to see it a little bit clearer.

I could change the, as I grow older, I could change the.

Dude, this is what I've been waiting my whole life for.

Yeah, dial vision, Walmart.

I must have been on pen.

Seven bucks.

I must have been on pen.

So you're listening to me.

Wait.

How much is the non-dial vision?

Well, this, well, the non-dial vision will have to keep buying glasses.

This one, I'll make it a little bit more distinct.

Right, these he'll have forever.

I'll never lose them.

Right, but my point is, if that's $7, how much are the regular ones?

Oh, they're cheap, too.

Please tell me they dial together and not individually.

You could close one eye and then you dial.

And then you close the other eye and you dial, and then you get the perfect vision.

These two old men convincing each other they're cool for dialogue vision.

No way!

That technology exists!

Laugh now, motherfucker.

I'm going to see you dialing in pretty damn soon.

You think I'm not going to Walmart right after this?

I want a dial-a-cycloner section.

I've got a giant sphere in front of myself.

I see the sign.

I see the end cap.

Thank you.

I see it on TV.

There you go.

Where's the dial-ovision end cap, please?

Thank you.

It's going to dial a vision.

Yeah, there were, I mean, the commercials stopped, though, which led me to believe.

I wonder if I'm damaging my eyes with my dial-vision.

You know, you can reach out to me.

Like I said, they were $7.

Just look this up.

The title of the new album.

Dial Vision Recall.

Mindfucker.

Using the F-word in the title,

did it take a lot of consideration?

Because it kind of.

A little, but it was like, it just seemed like I wanted to.

I was like, yeah, I want to call a record Mindfucker.

That's fucking wrong.

And you can.

Yeah.

And that's really ultimately.

I was like, I can.

What do I got to win?

I'm not going to be on the radio.

I heard you on the radio.

And I thought it was strange because they couldn't say the name of the album.

They're like, mind effort, mind effer.

And I'm like, so

I heard you on the rat, and nobody could say the name of the album.

And I'm just like,

did you consider the fact that nobody would be able to say the name of the album anywhere?

The only thing I considered was

N-word.

Record stores, I considered.

So when I decided to call it mind fucker

for completely juvenile, ridiculous reasons, and Barry Beavis and Budthead, like, fuck it.

I'm going to call it Mind Fucker

because it's Mind Fucker.

You know what I mean?

It's fucking Mind Fucker, dude.

And it just, anything less than that just didn't seem to make sense to me.

So I made that decision based on that juvenile, you know, made that decision based on basic juvenilia.

Did you have the what were you?

Are you the sole decider of that?

Like, you may have the

band is.

Yeah, I don't think, I don't think anybody else would have.

You know, they're like, really?

So, you do like to be in control.

Well,

I had to explain to them that.

Well, I didn't have to explain, they completely understand.

The world

is

not the same place that that it used to be for music and for a lot of other things.

Nobody cares.

Everybody cares.

What does it matter?

It's not like I'm going to make a lot of money if I name a record mind fucker, Let's Go, Everybody, Let's Rock.

Do you really think that this is going to, you know,

was that the only alternative?

Let's go, everybody.

Let's rock.

We should definitely need your alternative.

That's got to be your next album.

Let's go, everybody.

Let's rock.

Okay, everybody, let's rock.

Or don't.

It's okay.

Yeah, it'll be nice on the nice side.

Oh, you don't have to.

You know, if you want to.

I wanted to call something mindfucker because it was just cool to say mindfucker.

And I knew also that the people who would understand the dumbass sentiment behind that would be my kind of people.

Stupid is the new smart.

Hey, you got to take a quick ad break, but we'll be right back to tell him Steve Dave with special guest Dave Monster Magnet Windorf.

But briefly, I'd like to talk to you people about Miundies.

I always thought Miundis was that really cool underwear brand with the fun crazy prints, but it wasn't until I actually tried them that I realized that, holy crap, they are seriously the most comfortable thing I've ever worn.

They use micro-model fabric, which is a full three times.

That's three times softer, people, than regular cotton.

I couldn't believe how soft these things were.

It's the exact fabric you're going to want down there.

They release multiple fun prints each month and matching socks and bralettes.

And you will not believe the new design they have out there right now called Fool's Gold.

It is, it's crazy.

It's it's skulls and a whole bunch of gold coins with actual gold foil on the print.

So, I mean, you could you turn the lights off, you're gonna see these little gold coins glittering in the night.

So, I mean, I opened the package today and I just, I was, I was tickled pink to see it.

And if if you're not tickled pink, though, Miundi's offers a 100% satisfaction guarantee.

You're going to love these Miundis.

But if you're not into them, just send them back for a full refund.

Miundies just launched a brand new membership as well.

You can level up your top drawer with new Miundis each month.

Members gain access to exclusive prints that no one, I repeat, no one else can get.

They get special member pricing on every product Miundis makes.

And you can switch styles or skip any month you choose.

Miundies has a great offer for Tell'em Steve Dave listeners.

For any first-time purchasers, when you purchase any Miondies, you get 15%.

That's right, 15% off and free shipping.

This is what's called the no-brainer.

Get 15% off a pair of the most comfortable Undies you will ever put on.

To get your 15% off your first pair, free shipping, and 100% satisfaction guarantee, you must go to meundies.com/slash slash TESD.

That's meundies.com slash T

E S D.

Okay?

Told you it was going to be brief.

Now, back to Tell'em Steve Dave.

Before we started recording, we were talking about the Me Too thing a little bit.

Yeah.

Has that changed your behavior in any way?

Oh, the circus that you love.

Is it even possible to have a circle?

Yeah, it depends on what people are involved in the circus

and

men and women relationships, sex, sexual attraction, all those great mysteries of life that no one has ever figured out and no one ever will.

Most of that me too, the Me Too stuff

seems to sit in,

again, like well-educated, well-meaning people who

seem to be trying to deny some of the mysteries of life and trying to capture

some sanity here and there in an age of

insanity.

People are trying madly to try to find a villain somewhere.

And what better villain than like, you know, Harvey Weinstein guy?

He's like one of the best, he's like a Nazi.

You know, he's like, in the scheme of villains, it's like, well, there's the Nazi pig, and then there's the Hollywood producer, you know, the pig producer.

He's an honestly bad guy.

And they want it.

But with the internet, people tend to like

well equally they take their chances and and the next thing you know if people are hurling rotten tomatoes from 25 years ago uncorrobated you know rotten tomatoes and letting the public make up their mind but

it's interesting to note that it's only in the entertainment industry where this thing is holding any water because there's they're too much cowards to stand up for anybody anyway they just well i think people are more interested too in like oh i want to see this actor get taken down or this famous personality get taken down rather than like Joe Schmo from an office who goosed a secretary 20 years ago.

Well, that's absolutely true.

No, nobody's going to write about that guy.

No, I don't think they'll write about that guy because it doesn't fit into the, there's too many gray areas and it's not that interesting.

Again, with Americans and

myself included, and all of us, we grew up watching stereotypes that have been imprinted on us so long that this this is just another stereotype.

And naturally, we'd like to see it play out in a more exciting way than just in a movie.

We want to see the real

Hollywood fiend go down.

We want to see real people go down.

We want to see him go down.

We like it when it's nice and simple.

And the internet can't really bear

right now much.

It can bear a bunch of

gray, shades of gray,

nuance, but it doesn't want to.

It seems the internet wants, especially in this case, in most cases, heroes,

villains, and victims.

That we can get.

That we understand.

Give me a hero, give me a villain, give me a victim.

If there's any kind of like a gray area between, oh, this person's kind of good, this left.

It doesn't work that good for the narrative.

So something like Me Too could go for a long way.

Heroes versus villains.

But the way the internet goes, this non-stop thing is that there's not much talk about when people are wrong about it.

Oh, no, the retractions are few and far between.

A lot of collateral damage.

Yeah, I mean, the things that I've heard, a lot of them have been like, well, I think this guy deserves to get taken down.

But when you're giving equal gravity to, like, say, Harvey Weinstein and James Gunn making

bad tweets or like inappropriate tweets, so that's villains or victims

Heroes, villains, or victims.

Go sit next to Harvey.

Really?

James Gunn?

Go sit on Harvey's lap.

Really?

Yes.

Because we just don't have time.

We can't sell that.

We don't have internet time,

nor does it help our movement,

our well-meaning movement, to see you at any other, any other way than as bad as this guy.

Tough luck.

Everyone, you know,

you got to take some hits for the revolution.

It's nice to see some people come out and defend James Gunn, though, and be like, come on.

Like, they are weird tweets, but what's his name?

Was it?

I don't think it was Rubio.

It was one of those religious political guys who was like, well, you know, we should be investigating these tweets to see if they're true, because if they are, blah, blah, blah.

And it's like, so what?

Now you're going to investigate everyone who puts up a fucking tweet that they're going to be able to do.

Well, they can investigate all they want.

I mean, it's like if there were more investigations, the whole thing would be better over.

But I don't think nobody really

in this crazy

world of of

almost like idealism over actual fact, and both sides have it.

The right definitely have it, and the far left have it too.

Good nicks, bad nicks, everyone.

They really don't have the time to actually suss the facts out.

They just want to find the information that can weaponize their next attack against each other.

Hardwick was a good example of that, where somebody wrote.

Fucking Hardwick, that poor bastard.

He just got his job back.

Guess what?

you're guilty of being an asshole like being a bad boyfriend yeah or or not even or like who's to know if he was a bad boyfriend or not what it's just the word of some ex-girlfriend i'd be up the river a million times was that do you trust every ex-girlfriend to not uh me too the shit out of you

no

you're like they've made a joke back in 1976 i've i'd make the worst jokes in the world my my sense of humor is very very dark and black and it's just like way over the top you know and you don't have to care.

What?

It's good because you don't have to care about it.

Well, no, well, I do, and I care.

I mean, I.

Put your name and albums, mindfucker.

Like, you can probably make some off-color jokes that people aren't going to complain.

What do you want?

What do you want from me?

You bought a tiger, right?

So you.

Yeah, it's a weird world, and it's very uncomfortable.

And it makes a lot of people

worry about stuff that I think they shouldn't have to.

Like, it's putting a lot of girls,

it's putting a lot of women in a spot where they have to not even trust their common sense anymore this thing is telling them that your common sense is not good enough you have to perhaps you'd be better to listen to our common sense this collective common sense that's coming up

this was offensive you didn't know that you should be upset by this right almost like

as like you

unfortunately dear you've been very dumb and your common sense didn't work and you're really gonna have to look out for more problems.

It's your duty as a good person and a woman to start changing the future according to this kind of loose

idealism or idealism or group of facts or whatever, whatever that push is coming from this loose Me Too movement.

You're going to have to, you should, they're not telling you have to, but you should adhere to this.

and just basically be on your guard at all times, which is always a good idea, but not to the point where nobody has any trust in anybody else.

Yeah, to a point where you don't want to talk to people because you're like, who the fuck is that?

No,

I've seen some women like this.

They're just,

you know,

I was like, calm down.

So, as a rocker, that's not a challenge.

Like, they have that puss on.

You're not like, I'm going to lift that tarpaulin.

Yeah.

Lift that tarpaulin to soften her.

And, you know, this is kind of a small thing.

This is only in certain groups of people.

I don't think it goes, certainly not in Europe.

No?

Nah.

I find if I'm not online,

about two years ago, I stopped paying attention to the news as much as I possibly could.

And online, I don't go on as much.

So my interactions with people are mostly just

in person.

Right.

So you realize how far that stuff really goes.

It never comes up.

Nobody has problems with each other.

Everybody gets along.

It's crazy.

It's like there's two different

realities going on, I find.

Like if you're online, just everybody's at everybody's neck.

And if you're not online, I don't have a single problem with anybody, and nobody has problems with me.

Well, that's good to know because that's the way I feel.

I've been to Reddit too.

That's the way I feel, too.

Yeah.

Reddit?

No, I don't.

Reddit's the thing that sent me offline.

Reddit was a thing.

Do you ever look up yourself on Reddit, see what people are saying about you?

I don't spend too much time on Reddit.

I did.

You know, I'll go in every once in a while.

I stick my face in the furnace.

If I want to stick my face in a fan, I'll go on Reddit.

Why do you have to name it mind Effort?

says Walt F.

But yeah,

can I ask you about a couple songs on the album?

Do you enjoy when listeners try to interpret a song?

That's the best.

Oh, it's the best?

Okay, good.

I'm glad I did it then.

Drowning.

There's three songs I put

on Mind Effer that

I put as all-time, some of the best songs you've ever done.

I really really, they're top 10.

I love them.

It's Drowning is one of them.

I'm God

and All Day Midnight.

Now on Drowning,

is this song about somebody who, no matter what happens, no matter what they get, they're never going to be happy, and they just want to have somebody to blame.

That's exactly what the hell.

Oh, man.

I knew it.

I got to stress this.

I was talking to Pepio for a second.

What was this now?

I'm just

interpreting songs.

Okay.

And I got it right the first time.

You got it right.

It was called Drowning.

It's a really great song.

It starts off slow.

I love the tempo.

And then when it goes into chorus, it just gets heavy.

And it's about like, I could have everything that I ever need, but I'm still not going to be happy.

And it's your fault.

Yeah, looking for somebody to blame.

You got to always have somebody to blame.

I could have everything I need.

I could have all the money in the world.

I could be content.

I'm not going to be happy.

And the reason is, well, it's your fault.

It's got to be somebody else.

It's not my fault.

It's got to be somebody else's fault.

Please let it be.

And

the verses there are like a little personal story about me talking to a girl.

But

the chorus is just like, who do you got to blame?

I'll blame Jesus.

I'm like blaming God.

Well, I want to talk to Jesus.

I'll blame any.

Bring it in.

You mention Jesus God a lot in the songs.

Why is that?

He's a good guy to blame.

It's like outer space.

It's like when you got nothing else, maybe there's something out I don't quite understand, or maybe there's some person holding some sort of authority or some sort of moral superiority that I can blame.

Like, well, you know, I tried.

I'm always screaming at God in songs.

Like, why didn't you help me?

Well, that's the other song I love on the album is called I'm God.

I think the lyrics are

some of your best lyrics.

I love the lyrics, especially

this one line that really provoked a lot of thought in me was,

all you slobs got a lot to learn, learn, and the end of times is all you deserve.

It's God talking to humanity.

And it really made me go, I mean, you're

Dave talking to chicks who aren't choice.

And it made me think, like, as a species,

I don't know if we don't deserve the end of times.

The way we treat people, the way that we like hate each other on the internet, the way, and let alone the atrocities we commit on each other physically, but my God, the way we treat each other.

It's very nasty, man.

Very, very petty and nasty and like way below us.

I mean, look at where we are.

2018.

And we're acting like

little fucking girls.

It's disgusting.

What do you think?

Do you guys like, if it was the end of times, it was tomorrow,

how do you think the human race would

fare in God's eyes?

Probably not that well.

I think there'd be like a good 10% of people that made the cut.

Just 10% of all the billions of people in the world.

I think so, yeah.

What do you think, Brian?

It may be more than 10% because people who are, you know, religious or go to church aren't necessarily the nicest people.

So they may.

I'm not going to say it's just going to be all religious people.

Right, but I'm saying they may not make the cut either.

There may be some people who aren't religious at all.

You also have to, I guess, give way to children.

Like, at what age are they responsible for their what God are we talking about here?

Because Old Testament, New Testament God?

That's what, like,

that's the thing.

So I'm God is Old Testament God.

Yeah, he's breathing fire.

That's what I'm going by.

He's riding a lake of fire.

You know, he's riding a river of flame.

My God is Old Testament.

He's fucking fire and brimstone.

And I think that he's sick of all you motherfuckers.

But a lot of religious groups should adopt your song, I'm God, because I think a lot of people try to make God cheery and everything, but I think we need to bring back.

God can fuck you over if

you're not toeing the line.

It's true.

Wouldn't that be something, though, if that song is a hymn, like you go to church and you have to sing a magnet song?

Stop making a thing about it.

Well, it's really, it's a parent thing, too.

You know, it's like

I'm treating God as if he's like parents of a bunch of kids.

And he's giving the kids, you know, he wakes up and he goes, hey, you kids have been smoking in bed again.

What did that mean?

Smoking in bed is like you got caught something doing really, really stupid and dangerous.

And the line, again, I love the line where you say,

I let you put nails in my feet and then you went and peed in my creek, right?

Was it his creek?

Yeah.

Great.

Oh, my God.

It just sent shivers down my spine.

I'm not kidding around.

I love it.

The next album is a monkey peeing on a kid's head or whatever.

You know, it's like, it's weird.

It's like, it didn't take that long to write.

It was like I wasn't writing it.

Who was writing it?

I don't know, but I was just like,

these words are like coming out of my head, and I'm writing it down because you don't want to spend too much long,

too much time writing lyrics because you second-guess yourself and then you're like, what is this crap?

You know, it's brutal.

I'm not sure when you write material, you're just like, if I look at this anymore, I'm just going to pick it apart.

Also, with lyrics, there's some great songs that if you were just to read the lyrics and not know the melody or the tune or how it was being sung, you'd be like, this shit is corny.

It's really corny.

But then, you know, you hear it and you're like, wow, it's actually pretty good.

And I was really hoping that you were going to sing that song when we saw you live, but

that didn't make the set list, huh?

It might the next time.

It might the next time.

The album was so new then.

Sometimes if I come out with too much new stuff live, the crowd's like,

let's just say you don't want to walk

too ahead of your shadow.

You know, don't let the record come out a while.

We had an opportunity not too long ago.

We could have seen

Slayer and Anthrax that showed at the PNC.

Can't get Walt to go to it.

Monster Magnet, we're there.

Yes.

He did not want to rock to

the music style.

I'm so glad you guys came.

You got to come up and say hi afterwards.

I don't want to be in.

I don't want to interact with you.

We talked about it in Wall Street.

We didn't want to bother you.

That's crazy.

If there's anybody that doesn't belong backstage, it's this guy.

I do not belong backstage at a rock concert.

You would lose so much, Cred, bro, if I was back there.

Dude, I'm telling you, you would go.

It's like white bread coming through.

What do you do?

He's frowning at everyone.

Unless you start slapping drinks out of people's hands.

Hey, what are you doing?

Hall of Welcome.

Yeah.

We also figured it's a hometown show, and those are always like.

Well,

it was a nightmare.

I mean, it was just like

a lot of people there, man.

That kind of

a lot of people.

I have some listeners submitted questions.

All right.

If you could sing a duet with one artist, alive or dead, who would it be?

Wow, those are hard questions.

Beyonce.

What was that, Beyonce?

Beyonce.

What a pairing.

What did you be like?

Oh, my God.

It would bring serious attention.

Yeah, and that would bring some serious attention.

Yeah, Beyonce.

This album would be called Mindfucker.

It's got to be called Mindfucker's Real.

She doesn't talk like that at all.

Not at all.

I've heard her sing.

I don't think I've ever heard her talk, though.

I mean, it's not the deep south in the 1800s.

That's really funny.

Oh, mammy.

Mammy.

Take it away, Miles the Magnet.

Wow, a duet.

A duet like you can sing with any artist, alive or dead.

It would have to be a girl.

Really?

Yeah, who wants to sing a duet?

I want to sit right next to a dude.

I want to share the hunt.

You know what I mean?

Come on, let's sing a duet, my friend.

It's not 2018 on Planet.

Stand to the magnet.

Come on, Eli.

Yeah, you.

I want to sing with you.

Come here.

Cheek to cheek.

Well, I don't mean, I don't mean, like, you know, like, there's got to be like when Paul and John, they would sing with the two different verses, right?

That's true.

Yeah, so I didn't see it as, like, you guys were, like, singing a love song.

69-year up on 60.

Yeah, I guess the word duet was

thrown you.

Nancy Sinatra 67, maybe?

Oh,

I think that would be good.

Yeah, like Boots or something like that.

Yeah.

That would would be nice.

I'd like to see with Dolly Parton.

That'd be something I'd tune in for.

All right.

So it's dancing.

Did you pull apart your microphone?

Yeah, it's a really bad job.

You were free to do it.

I thought it was done.

That's why I didn't even look into it anymore.

Okay.

Do you have an iPod?

Do I?

Yeah.

Sure.

Do you have any guilty pleasure songs on an iPod that you wouldn't want any other

band members to hear?

You really love it.

Raise your love.

I I kind of came out of the closet with that a long time ago.

So it's like

my love of music is pretty well known to be just completely ridiculous and retarded, you know, for no reason at all.

You know,

although

there are things, I guess, that everybody would draw the line.

Right.

But people like that with a listener, like somebody who was the biggest Monster Magnet fan, would be like, you know, you're.

Yeah,

but thanks you're like the like, you know, hard rocking, and then if they got backstage, I heard you like chilling out to this song.

Like the Westside Story soundtrack or some shit like that.

Well, yeah, no, I actually do.

I absolutely, yeah, show tunes usually, that's where I even draw the line.

Show tunes.

Show tune.

Showtime.

I know.

I'm into it.

I was listening to the fucking Groundhog Day soundtrack driving down here.

I don't give a shit.

Well, you mean Groundhog Day, the movie?

No, the musical.

Oh, the music.

Dude, it was unbelievable.

Is it?

It was.

All right.

Well, I'm always ready to be impressed, but

yeah, I was like old show tunes, you know, like Rogers and Hammerstein and stuff like that, probably draw the line there.

Right.

And,

you know, I'm so pretty, I'm so pretty and witty and gay.

And modern country.

There's no modern country.

Old country.

But old school country.

Oh, old school country is the best, but modern country is just a worse for me.

For them to play it on vintage hee-haw, that would be.

Yeah, that's it.

Buck Owens and stuff like that.

Yeah, that stuff's cool.

It's funny.

Okay.

But my,

and I would listen to that, and they'd probably be most surprised that I would listen to

Rihanna or something.

That's current, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I'll listen to a couple of Rihanna songs.

Well, last time you were on, you said that you go on like pop culture, pop music, binges for like a month or two at a time just to get caught up.

Yeah, yeah.

I thought that was pretty fast.

I do.

Just to see what it see what's out there is like.

I want to like stuff.

It's horrible when you go out there and you're like, there's nothing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If there's a point where it doesn't feel it's horrible.

There's nothing new for me, you know, except

when

one of my favorite artists puts something out, then even when sometimes it's not good, it's just like

mindfulness disagree with

my taste.

Yeah, sometimes the titles are too explicit.

His title should have come with a warning.

You didn't offer like a

clean version, the clean version, the Walmart version.

Actually, we did.

You're using your dialogue to look for it.

You know something?

Like, I offered a clean version to all the retailers,

and nobody wanted it.

No,

you can't sell clean versions anymore, right?

No, they don't want to.

They don't want to.

Yeah.

They don't know they'll be able to sell the dirty version.

Everybody wants a dirty version.

Even though parents will say they want the choice, they know they're going to let their kids buy the dirty version.

Yeah.

It's It's too bad.

Cats out of the bag.

Remember when fucking Poison

was a poison put out an album and the tongue was too long on the cover and they black out the

tongue.

We were insane as a country.

Fucking nut open up and say ah, wasn't it?

Like

Slippery When Went was another one.

It was like they just blacked out so you just saw the eyes.

Like, what the fuck are we talking about?

People spent time on that.

A lot of time on that.

They did.

Did you hate the PMRC back in the day?

Or were you you liked it?

I thought it was funny.

I thought it was good for the industry.

I liked the fact that they were overreacting.

It was fun.

It was good for rock.

I got a real interesting question here.

I would love to hear this answer if you would consider it instead of just.

Well, I'm going to switch out these batteries real fast.

You should be just sucking electricity out of the air.

So I hope that you'll give this next question some consideration and really, because I'm interested in the answer.

And even if you say no, you never have.

Maybe.

What is this question?

Why would I say no?

Because it's no, it's an interesting question as an artist.

I expect you to.

Well, I hope that you, like, let's say you never have considered it, but if you had to, like someone was like, gave you like a shitload of money to make it, have you ever considered doing a concept album?

Sure.

Is that true?

Weren't you just saying that?

No, I have.

You know, I really have.

Why not?

That was a weird sort of inflection.

Yeah, it didn't sound very convincing.

It's like you don't trust them.

Well,

you have to be honest.

That answer was not like, he was just like, he didn't know what to say.

It's kind of like.

Sure.

Well, it's like, uh-huh.

Jot something down.

I took it as like he was like, yes, but not seriously.

Not, I'm lying to you.

Yeah, I mean, I could just, I mean, believe me, man, if I just went in and just went in full geek,

you know, if I just went on full geek, I could.

So, in the context album, you would consider

a geek move at this stage?

Yeah, I think

it might.

Well, because I think I'd be boring the listener.

It'd be like, now here's another chapter in my story.

It's like,

here's another chapter.

That's between every single track.

Let's mock.

Why not?

It's a concept album, bro.

Here's chapter one of my story.

The final chapter of.

No, you know, it's a

concept albums.

But they're part of like rock lore, though.

I mean, like the song.

King Diamond is.

But I tell you, I couldn't do one without laughing, so it would be pretty funny.

You know what I mean?

It would be, it'd be, it'd be,

um,

that's even weirder

it I would have to make it like the fun I mean because all I did was laugh at concept albums when I was a kid like Rick Wakeman's Journey to the Center of the Earth no right it would have to be on that scale but it would have to be massive but you see I think that science kitchen stoner I don't think you realize though with people who like really love your music I mean like for me if you were like if you announced that you were in a concept album about space and time and all that fucking great shit

and it was a double album,

you would make it a triple album.

I mean, people would be going like...

It's not a triple.

It would be like, we would be so excited, though, because just

your concept album would shatter, I think,

the concept of a concept album.

Well, you flatter me because you imply that there's some wisdom at the end of this.

But believe me, there'd be no wisdom.

You know, there'd be no.

Like, I would come up with a lousy, probably a rotten story that's been told a million times before by writers all over the world and try to like, what, impart it through music?

I don't know what that is.

I decided to tell a novel through music.

You know, and

three albums.

No brevity.

Oh, but I could definitely stretch it out.

Yeah, I mean, could have

a bonus disc or some sort of contest with like three different endings to the story, three different songs that would be a different ending, gentlemen.

Well, I mean, just like Thick is a brick, just how like there was no breaks in the songs.

Like, if you did something like that,

I would eat it up.

I would eat it up, and it would just be, I don't know.

I'm going to tell you something.

I lied.

That question wasn't from a listener.

That was for me.

I'll allow you to do a concept album.

Is that what it took us so personal?

You just

thick as a brick at me.

And Thick is a brick at me.

And now I'm like, oh, yeah, okay.

I pushed off my fleet.

I love big as a brick.

I know every bit of that record.

I've listened to it so many times.

Your sperm is in the gutter.

Yeah,

that's the album.

I was going to say, that's a line from the album.

That's a declaration.

Your sperm's in the gutter.

It loves that.

If you're wondering where I put it.

If you're wondering why I spit it out.

Somebody was in the restroom, so I don't run outside.

You want to shame the both of us.

No, I know that's a good one.

On the other side, Sai 2 is like, Paul has a lot of people.

Want to sing a duet?

Now, I know that history is not kind to some people's concept albums.

I know Kiss did one that is

mocked.

That's one of the worst albums of all time.

The LD.

The LD.

Yeah, fantastically bad.

But I think that, like, I don't know.

I mean, I would just hope you wouldn't just, like, poo-poo it and maybe consider.

I think it would be amazing.

Maybe roll the dice and get into the pantheon.

The fucking worst concepts ever.

Yeah, it's never too late, right?

It's never too late to get to get addicted to prescription drugs.

It's never too late to seek.

Like, I'm past that.

Your career with a concept on you.

It's done.

But

you tell stories.

Here's what you're doing next.

But you tell me.

You're just doing my interpretation of Edgar Allan Poe's The Raven.

You don't have to be.

It's like, don't try to be pompous and like, but just like embrace your storytelling because you tell amazing stories in these little songs,

these short songs.

But if you were to go like 15-minute song about, you know,

an albion,

I would love it.

I know there's a lot of people that would just be like

beating it up.

Well, you can't.

There could also be a lot of people who need the actual limitations of my talent.

I don't like to stretch it so thin that, you know, you just see the membrane of like,

yeah.

The first disc was pretty funny, I guess.

Second one was laborious.

Honestly,

the third one was just the plot of Lord of the Rings.

He didn't even try and hide it.

He called the fucking Hobbit Frodo.

Like, don't do the third album.

All right, well, that's it.

I'm just, I'm going to do it.

I'm going to do an interpretation of

Orson Will's Citizen Kane as a romance.

I think it's got to be original.

I think it's got to be original for just

your

magnum opus.

Now, what if Dave wanted you to

co-write it?

He wanted some lyrics from you.

And I couldn't give him lyrics.

I mean, I'm not impressed with the way he writes.

But if he's like,

you know, he's just bouncing stuff off me, like, and he's just, all he's got to say is like planets.

Oh, I'll name stuff.

Dinosaurs.

You know, interstellar

war.

I mean, I would be like, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Give it to me.

Give it to me now.

I want to take it.

All right.

So you're not poo-pooing it entirely, but.

No, I'm actually pretty excited.

Got to go work on it right now.

Scratching my chin, baby.

It never crossed your mind.

Ever?

Well, no.

I mean, I've arranged songs.

I've arranged songs.

And the songs have been written.

I wrote

90% of the stuff I write is written all at the same time, like groups of songs.

So there'll be somewhat of a

thematic continuation between some of the,

in these albums.

And they could be, and I've had people say,

the concept album?

And I was like, really, but kind of.

I mean, there are certain themes that get revisited.

Would you ever consider bringing, like, on the concept album, maybe bringing an orchestra too?

I'd have to.

Oh, I would have to fire off all the time.

I mean,

we ought to go down like

the biggest tease that ever in the history of.

You either win everything or completely lose and stand next to Popeye.

Stand next to great film disasters like Popeye.

All right.

And

this one is from a listener, though, this last one.

All the rest were from you.

Your thoughts on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and does an induction make you part of the establishment?

You know, I never can figure out what's going on with that Rock and Roll Hall of Fame because it seemed like it would be a good idea,

but the way it's handled and the bands they leave out, it's just really weird to me.

It just seems, I don't know what they're doing.

I mean, does it, but does an induction just automatically just make you corporate?

Kind of.

Yeah.

But

i don't know it's it rock and roll never seemed something that to me when i was a kid that would ever have anything like that so it seemed like they try to put rock into some sort of sports mindset you know where

and it's like it doesn't always fit not with me i mean it never fit with me so you know some of my favorite bands aren't in there mc5 i don't know if they got inducted last year but all were they up for a nomination they were up for a nomination we actually helped bon jovi get in you did yeah we did a like you yeah we did a uh

plea.

We did a plea to listeners to vote him in.

Why in the world would you do that?

You know what?

Yeah, I don't know why.

He kind of rallied me.

He got me excited.

He's like, that's Bon Jovi.

It's a local boy.

Yeah, I mean.

A local boy who's got trillions of dollars.

He doesn't need

Bon Joe.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Bon Jovi?

Well,

I'm friends with the family.

There's a personal request.

No, no, no.

I don't.

Believe me, I don't.

I don't.

Wow.

Say as you will.

But you don't think that.

I mean, he's got the.

Come on, that boy needs some help.

But he's got the cattle.

Come on, we can.

He's.

If we all pull together.

He's broken down on the road.

Come on, let's help him.

Let's help.

We need some help, boy.

But it's not like he could have got in regardless.

He was going to get in regardless, right?

Oh, you don't believe it was our commercial?

No, I like to think that we kind of, in our small way.

He'd be fucked without us.

I'm sure.

I'm not sure how

that operates there.

Why some people get left out once, some people don't.

I'm sure there's.

It's political, I've heard.

Well, yeah, it's got to be like the Oscars or something like that.

You know, it's all politics.

But yeah, I would guess that once you're in there, yeah, you're on that side of the fence.

You kind of lose your.

But I don't remember anybody that's inducted except for Bon Jovi.

I don't know either.

Yeah, it's like it's not anything that's a similar.

I've got all the bands that are on your,

I'm sure Petty's in there.

Yeah.

I'm sure that, like, you know, Alice Cooper Band is in there.

Kiss got in there.

Sure, but

it wouldn't affect me

either way whether someone I liked was in there or not.

I don't think the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is nearly as big as they think they are, that's for sure.

You know what I mean?

It's like what they're trying to be.

Well, who the fuck are they?

I don't know.

Why do they get to decide?

That's what I mean.

It's like, why do they decide, like, again,

they're trying to move this cultural

matter of opinion into a sports thing.

I mean, sports you can't deny.

You get stats, or you don't have the stats.

Well, you got

the album sales.

Well, you got album sales.

Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything.

It's not the only spirit of rock and roll.

It's like, you know, there's got to be rock and roll is based on like, you know, people

liking stuff.

I mean, Who Let the Dogs Out was like one of the best-selling albums of the fucking decade.

Are they in the whole thing?

Who knows, maybe?

They might be.

But think about that.

That song was tremendously successful.

It was a novelty, though.

It was a huge novelty.

I mean, obviously it's too many, but there's a hundred overlooked acts.

Who stands out to you?

Bad Company, Allison Chains.

Who are not in there?

They're not in there.

Megadeth, Doobie Brothers.

How could a Doobie Brothers not be in there?

That's insane.

The Doobie Brothers should have been the first

class.

The first ballot.

Jay Giles.

Africa Bombada.

Wasn't he the last in kids?

Africa Bombada.

Yeah.

He was, right?

I love him.

Well, that's probably going to hurt his chances.

Yeah, I think Chubby Checker is not in there.

Chubby Checker is not in there.

He's not that one hit, though.

It doesn't matter.

But I mean, he's Chubby Checker.

Yeah, he started rock, basically, right?

I thought it was a

Hall of Fame, not a Hall of Fame number.

Burnless was one who stole

the stuff to him.

But does Chubby Checker have the catalog to get in?

I know he's the name, and he's got rock.

Was it what was this big song?

The twist, twist, twist, right?

And then the twist again.

Don't forget that.

I mean, just because

he was a household name.

I don't see why he's in there.

Household name, yes.

But that's a good idea.

A lot of people today would not know Chubby Checker.

Like if you told your kids, Chubby Checker.

They're big.

Is that your friend you do the podcast with?

He's been a household name for about 30 years.

I think that's good.

That's pretty good.

Chubby Checker was recognized in the 50s, 60s, and 70s.

Would you accept if.

If tell them Steve Dave does it again, we say we're going to do a grassroots effort.

We're going to get somebody in guaranteed.

Oh, would you turn it down or would you accept the nomination

if they were to say

Monster Magic's going into the Hall of Fame?

Wow.

Would you turn it down if

rock and roll fashion?

I guess I could.

I'm going to sing that to it.

I feel like

it's a mind fuck.

No, yeah, but this is

fucking my mind.

What would be really cool would to accept it and then go there and then just throw it on the ground and smash it?

It doesn't do that.

That'd be fucking rock and roll.

It would, but would people

appreciate that these days?

Would they be like, oh, that was poor form?

And they'd be hashtagging like Monster Magnet no.

Yeah,

they definitely would be Monster Magnet no.

I mean, it wouldn't be for, you know, for me to gain mass acceptance, that's for sure.

No, and, but the people who do care about stuff would love it.

Yeah.

They would go, yeah, Monster Man went to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and the guy from Monster Man picked up the award and said this is bullshit

all over the place that's for sure

because they know it's they know it's kind of bullshit so remember when ODB rushed the stage at the awards and fucking started declaring that Wu-Tang was for the children it was brilliant that's right I remember that

it was amazing where when Kanye cracked out of his head he's just wandering or when Kanye went up with a television

yeah it's just like it shows it's just really unimportant but people got upset by it yeah you know people get upset by that shit but it's just like come on with the fucking awards every two minutes.

Because really, what is it really recognizing something or it's meant to sell more shit?

You know, awards show just want to sell more.

Even when I was a little kid, I was like, what?

It never, never, you know.

People get really excited by the Academy Awards, and I'm like, who gives a fuck about?

It's such a joke.

They've always has been a joke since the very beginning.

I've read the history of the Academy Awards.

It's a joke.

It's like it's just a bunch of people slapping each other on the back, and it has nothing to do with nothing.

And again, probably, like you said, political, and there's some money changing hands.

Oh, yeah.

I thought they used to accuse Harvey of buying Oscars all the time.

Really?

Yeah.

He could have bought one for fucking clerks or clerks too, I thought, but never did.

So now that you released an album about a half a year ago, right?

Yeah.

How long does it take you to then ramp up?

And when can we expect the follow-up to Mind Effer?

When does this concept all come out?

But you won't stop talking about it.

I should be writing it right now.

Really?

That quick?

Yeah, because I know I've got stuff to do like mind effer

all right thank you mind effort

um

mind effort still has to be supported so i'm doing you know we're doing american tour and then another european tour in january and then yet another uh european tour next summer as far as um

festivals and stuff and whatever i can get in there australia south america whatever it's like you know you draw back the bow you know and you shoot that record like an arrow,

see how far it can go, and you just tour around it and hope, you know, hope you can do it.

So I should be writing that stuff now.

But of course, I'm not.

You know, in the couple months I had off between tours, I'm just riding my bicycle around like some crazed Vietnam veteran in the middle of the night.

I've almost hit Dave on no less than three occasions.

For real?

I'm like, who is this fucking guy?

Like the Ross and Rosen shit.

Madly trying to keep, you know, this middle-aged gut off.

It won't go.

You know, it's like, get on the bike.

So

I'll probably go back and just hit it

next year at some time and just do the whole thing, just like Mind Effer, all at once.

I love that he's called it by.

I want to see a video of a show where that's what you're saying.

You're not saying Mind Fucker.

You're not working the crowd up like Mind Effer.

And everyone's like, wait, what?

But I have some kids in the audience tonight.

Welcome to Walmart Stadium.

But I'm not blowing smoke, though.

For listeners out there, if you're I mean, pick up a mind effort because it's it's really good.

And the last song is really good too.

The hammer comes down.

I know all the songs.

I know all the songs.

And

I listen to it.

Since it's come out, I've listened to it initially for about 30 days straight, and then I went down to

every third day.

And now it's about like once a week.

Dude, you're like, I fucking salute you.

You're like the best guy in the world.

Thank you.

It's like

that gutter warmed up again.

Come on, Rock.

Sperm's in the sink.

Sperm's in the gutter.

Sperm's in the gutter.

Your love's in the sink.

That's the real line.

That's amazing.

I mean, do you know how that's so cool that you just sing a line on Tell him Steve Dave?

I mean, that's fucking, that just fucking does so much for it.

Like, just makes me feel so good to have you sing an actual line on our song.

Did I ever give you the tape of that record, Captain Lockheed and the Star Wars thing?

That's a pretty insane concept album.

You know, at one time, I don't know if I did, do I ever tell this story?

Maybe I told it on the, but I remember I was, I was,

it's just how out of my mind I was.

This is how much I wanted Dave to be a part of the Christmas episode that I begged, not begged him, but I had, I went over and to Christmas.

What you suggested?

And I went to Tim and I was like, I want to give Dave

some

at the crazy amount of money to sing one song on.

I remember the amount, and I was like, we have that much.

I remember this, you were panicked about insulting him.

Yeah, because I was just like, I wanted him to

sing a song that I had written, I Sell Comics.

And

I was so like,

I thought he was more to do it.

I was like, he's more to a friend.

I was like, you should ask him.

But we did ask him, and then he said no.

Well, that's it, bro.

That's part of it.

If you can't do it, he can't.

He's holding ahead.

Boom.

In the gutter next to the sperm.

But I like that.

I like that he said no, and he's here now.

Like, I like that.

Shoot straight.

Look, I don't want to do it.

So I'm not going to do it for money.

There's a million reasons I would say no to things beyond what you would ever think it would be.

I could be an error like putting my robotic arm back on or, you know, or, you know, trying to get out of some weird relationship or something.

There's a million reasons why I don't do things.

So we should ask everybody.

In this case, it was.

Every year around Christmas, we should approach you with the offer again?

No.

No?

What would you like to say?

Let's see.

What do I got coming up this year?

Bad relationship and Christmas week.

No, every couple of years.

Okay.

You never know.

All right.

Well, you reach out to me.

Since you know the offer's on the table,

you know my email.

If you ever like, hey, I'm interested in that.

That's how I'm gonna say now.

I'd rather write a hellblaser comic.

That's what I'd really want to do.

If you draw a hellblazer, Hell Rider, Hell Rider, Hell Rider, Hell Rider comic.

That's if you want, again, anything you want to do, I'm open to it.

You want your yard rings?

What's the song?

I wrote a song called

Scalpa songs as well.

As a joke, it was like that kind of bombastic lyrics of like

of how ridiculous it would be that a company.

Well, yeah, you've got to send me the lyrics.

Something to inspire me.

But I wrote it.

I put Elephant Bell on.

And I put the words.

I just substituted the words so you would have

just put.

You sent me this whole thing?

No, I didn't even get a chance to even tell you what you would have to do.

And

it was to the song Elephant Bell, which is my favorite Monster Maggot song.

Timpaston.

Fuck him.

And

I just took out the words of Elephant Bell and put in the words that would fit in there that were to I Sell Comics, which I don't even remember any lyrics right now.

It was just I could sell comics to a blind man.

I need your vision.

Give me some vision or something.

Okay.

So I could be your trained fucking monkey

at Christmas time.

What else do you want me to do?

You're not busy, are you?

But then we give you the rights back

and you could put it on the concept album.

We give you the rights back to the bottom.

You trust the rest of the three albums around that song.

You're really blowing my mind.

The people, the kids who sang that song actually went on to become kind of successful.

Encourage my love.

Yeah,

they sang the song that's the one that Ming and Mike use for their podcast.

And they're like, they do the whole warp tour thing and they tour like on their own.

I don't think it's because they sung I saw comics, but yeah, this is at the end of the day.

And you're like,

and you're like, I'm never doing anything ever again in music.

Then you hit me up.

Okay.

That'll work.

That's on his bucket list.

There's a.

Okay, Walt, if you don't want to take LSD in the nursing home with me, it turns out two elderly German men escaped the confines of their nursing home on Friday to attend the Wacken Open Air Heavy Metal Festival.

Yeah.

Right?

They found the aging metalheads at 3 a.m.

the world's biggest heavy metal festival.

That's huge.

Then they're reluctant to leave the four-day festival, so police escorted them home with the help of a taxi and a patrol car.

Why the fuck, they're adults.

Why can't they go?

They might not have all their faculties.

That's what it said.

It says they appeared dazed and disoriented.

Yeah, no shit.

They were taking drugs and wrong.

Yeah, man.

They're going to have a good time.

It's like, you have so much time left.

Not a lot.

Stay in that fucking nursing home.

Stay in that day room.

I don't know, dude.

Tell me right now, that's not optioned already by Disney.

That little bit.

A light to Nero and Morgan Freeman.

Right?

It's already a movie.

Did they go there on little rascals?

Yeah.

Of course.

And they stole two Little Rascals

up the German highway.

Danzig, Judas Priest, Hate Breed, In Flames, Running Wild, Arch Enemy.

I start losing track of metal bands.

Any music, really.

Like most of this.

Like Vans Warp Tour.

I don't know if they still do it, but when my niece went, I'm like, 120 bands, don't know one of them.

Literally do not know one band.

I'm out of it.

That's what happens.

I'm out of it.

Well, part of it, it happens just because of age.

Another,

it's been a bunch of great bands coming up in the last bunch of years.

It's different.

It's not,

nobody's shooting for the bleachers anymore.

They're just like coming out with bands just to survive within their little niches.

It's like nobody's really trying.

It's weird.

It's like

Rock isn't dead, but they certainly are acting like it is.

What's that?

Greta Van Fleet?

Is that the band you like?

Greta Van Fleet.

Yeah, Walt likes them too.

No, I said they were amazing, the sound of that voice.

If that was a real voice coming out, little guy.

Oh,

amazing.

He's got the most amazing voice ever.

I mean, it looked like it was a fake video when I saw him singing because it looked like this little guy with that powerful of a voice.

This was shocking.

Yeah, I guess it's a little bit like D.

And he sounds a lot like Robert Plant.

I mean, he sounds almost exactly like Robert Flint.

It would be better if he had his own voice, but.

No, no, no, I was going to say, when he said that, Rock is not dead, but people were acting like it's, we should have said, tell him Steve Dave right there.

Interesting.

That was poignant.

Yeah, that was.

That was a really poignant moment to go out on.

So replay it and say it.

Tell him Steve Dave.

Now you know I'm going to keep all that in.

Yes.

Thanks, Dave.

Yeah, thank you.

Yeah, Dave, you remain my favorite guest of all time.

Every time you come in,

it's the best.

You guys ask me, man.

I love it.

Except Christmas.

Let's not push it.

Clean up nights and I can press.

Bat those eyes and I mess.

You say you're trouble and nothing less.

But I'm not gonna

yet.

You say those things that I wanna hear.

Sweet little nothing's in my ear.

Whatever it takes to distract

what's happening behind my back.

No.

A pickpocket

on pickpocket.

Rhyme, ride, I

know.

A pickpocket

on pickpocket.

Gotta wait this time.

I'm

a pickpocket,

pickpocket

Rob me brighty igno, a pickpocket

of pickpocket Gotta wait this tiny I'm with my mind

when my heart

left me nothing

the sky of Mars with my mind

When my heart

gets over before

it starts

high

You offer your hand and I bother

Whisk me away with cliches

Yeah, something is off, but it's not enough to cut all out your love.

Yeah,

your eyes start to wander, and I'm sure

you've done this dance many times before.

And just as quick as the lights came up, you're on to the next day.

A pick-bock, yeah, oh, pick-pock, yeah.

Robin is by

a pick-pock, yeah, oh, pick-pock, yeah.

Got away this tiny

I'm pickbox, yeah,

pickpocket gay

Rhyme dry

I

know a pickpocket, yeah,

pickpocket

Got away this tiny item with my mind

with my heart

Let me nothing the sky of Mars with my mind

with my heart

It's over

before it starts.

How many pockets have your hands been in?

How many fools have made a man?

How many pockets have your hands been?

it'll pull me once you are fully yet.

Pickback, get a pickpocket.

Rob me, fly

i know a pickpocket,

pickpocket.

Got away this time, yeah, yeah, I'm pickpocked, get a pickpocket.

Rob me, fly on the i'm a pickpocket,

pickpocket.

Got away this time.

The I with my mind

with my heart

left me nothing.

The sky of ours with my mind.

But my heart gets over before it starts.

This has been a production of Smodco Internet Radio, sir only at Smodcast.com.