Bright Lights Big Silly: Thursday, July 11th, 2024

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Good morning, Millennials, and welcome back to the toast.

Happy Thursday from a beautiful 19-year-old.

Yes, yesterday was my birthday.

Yesterday was Claudia's birthday.

We forgot to tell you that we were taking off for the day, but we were forward thinkers.

Not only did we need off for the day to celebrate turdy in full, but we needed off for the day because we were not well.

We are low-key, so sick.

There is like a sickness in this home that is destroying swirly summer.

I feel so much better today.

It destroyed swirly summer.

It destroyed my birthday.

Like it's insane.

We didn't even go out to dinner last day.

We had this fabulous dinner reservation.

We looked at each other.

We're like, there's no way.

We all fell asleep during nav time yesterday.

We woke up feeling worse.

And today I have resolved to be normal.

Like

me too.

Not even just like be good and like normal.

Cause I've been so productive, but I feel like I'm just like racing through life.

Like I'm not processing things.

Like I have decided today that I'm going to be a normal person.

Come Come hell or high water.

Jackie, I completely agree.

I have decided today like is the first day of the rest of my life.

No more falling out of coconut trees.

No, no, no.

We have been insane.

Like we are so back in a sort of heteronormative, no, no, neurotypical.

Neurotypical space.

Neurotypical space.

Even if it doesn't feel that way, like I will fake it till I make it.

Like I am pushing through.

I will not allow this to go on in my life any longer.

No, I completely agree.

I'm so glad we're on the same sort of recovery wave.

I feel like mold toxicity is a choice.

I, we are choosing to be bogged down by mold and its toxicity.

We were choosing it.

We weren't fighting against it.

We weren't being strong-willed of the mind.

We let it like wash over us.

I'm taking back my power tonight.

1000%.

Not only because it's been enough, but also we have a live show today at the West Hampton Beach Performing Arts Center.

There are hundreds of toasters.

I would say that's probably why we're getting our act together.

No, and I feel better already.

Like, it's gonna be a great show today, tonight, tomorrow.

And it's like enough, enough.

The

mold and its radioactive energy has seriously destroyed enough of our summer.

It's true.

It cannot destroy our business.

If you feel me veering into like silly-nilly waters, I got you.

Bring me back

man overboard.

I don't know.

I do feel it like starting to wash over, but I do feel like it's just you and I under these bright lights being silly.

It's you and I under these bright lights.

It's so true because we were being so normal this morning.

We started on time.

I think that's also been an issue.

Yep.

Our time has been willy-nilly and it's been leading to silly-nilly.

Jackie, it's giving bright lights big big silly.

Title.

It is.

So I

happen to like really like this setup, even though we're getting like some hate.

I guess on Tuesday's episode, I was like, this is some of our best audio quality yet.

And people were like, it's really not.

And I guess it's the volume's been a little low.

I'll turn it up today.

I'm so sorry.

Actually, you know what?

Let me get on here.

Let me see if I can.

No, no, no.

Sit your ass down to it.

Turn it up in post.

I'm not talking about what I thought I was doing.

No, you're so right.

The mold.

no it's just like the haters getting to you

so yes we're in our swirly summer also wait sorry speaking of haters i know you don't see these things because i'm just like a rat who lives in the gutters of the internet but um a lot of people thought that like our you know minky couture blanket was one of us covering up something Just being fat.

Just big fat thighs.

Yeah.

Like people are like, does anybody else feel like the blankets are giving like someone's hiding a belly?

I am hiding a belly of food.

Yeah.

No, it's called big fat thighs, cellulite,

coldness.

It is freezing because we record in my room and you know like my room is nice.

It's giving like no temperature control in the house because like we're upstairs, the heat rises.

So you have to put on the EC to combat it.

But we're sitting here in like our summer wears.

It's just a mess, but not no longer.

Not today.

Like today we're sitting here cold.

No blanket.

I think the blanket was also like not helping our cognitive state.

Yeah, because it gives like this sense of comfort.

Like we're just in bed laughing.

Yeah, it was giving in bed with Joan.

It was giving in bed with laughter.

That too.

So we're back is basically what we're trying to say.

We're back to work.

Bruno's back to work.

Like we're taking this very seriously today and you will have a serious episode.

So if the silliness wasn't for you, congratulations.

We're back.

Bright lights in the big sale.

Who sings that?

Ceeilo Green?

Oh yeah, that's a weird song.

That's like not a song.

Well, CeeLo Green is kind of like a weird person, just in the sense of you take a look at his career at a glance, which is one of my favorite songs.

And that's what we're going to do today?

Taking a look at CeeLo Green's career at a glance.

Literally, why not?

If we don't do it on this podcast, nobody else will.

If we don't do it, who will?

Well, I think a lot of people, you know, came to learn late in life that CeeLo Green, you know, everyone's favorite Jolly Green giant.

Sorry, that was mean.

I didn't mean like in a fat way.

I actually really did not.

I meant because I did.

It's like a vibe.

I don't know why I have this like memory of him on the voice wearing this like monochromatic green outfit.

I feel like he was always wearing all green, Cee-Lo Green.

Yeah, okay, Jolly Green.

Yeah, I didn't mean big at all.

But also, like, if you don't know, that he is overweight.

But that's really not why I'm so hungry.

I need to shut the fuck up.

He's neither here nor there.

It's not like he's tall.

Yeah, he just was giving like big teddy bear, like love boat energy.

And a lot of people didn't know.

They're like, why is this person famous?

It's because he's Narls Barkley, who sings the best song ever.

Does that make you crazy?

And then he.

And fuck you.

Yeah, of course, of course, of course.

And then there was that,

I feel like that was the first instance of, you know, people getting duped on the internet.

Do you remember that video that went viral of it was like a security camera footage of CeeLo Green sitting in a recording studio and his phone actually blows up?

It like, it was like a Samsung.

It was fake, but like I got duped by that.

But whatever I do think of Ceeilo Green, I do think of that video.

And of course, his iconic stint on the voice.

Okay.

So that's Cee-Lo Green's career at a glance.

And speaking of at a glance, I'm sitting with Juni B.

Cortez.

You are.

I'm sitting with Junior Cortez at a glance.

You have band-aids on your index and middle finger.

Can you talk to us about that?

I can.

I cut myself.

cooking once really stop.

That's not fun.

No, no, that was seriously a joke.

I did a bad cut on my index finger, which brought me into band-aid territory, which then made me put a band-aid on the ancillary cuts I also received because I'm using like a new kitchen setup, a new knife, and this knife is amazing, but like I didn't have my grip on it.

Also, I was slicing tomatoes, which slippery.

Just throw them in the garbage because you're just going to cut yourself.

And it's crazy because you look so gorgeous today, like so put together.

Your makeup is glowing.

I love your Travis Matthew golf dress.

Thank you.

And the band-aids are just, it's actually taking away from the whole lot.

I know, but like a hunk of my skin is about to fall off.

So.

So what do we do?

And I think in that case, we have to forego and enter our Juni B.

jones era yeah junior why did i keep saying judy b jones who's that that's the books yeah juni cortez no i mean it just it is what it is i'm gonna have them on stage tonight like oh wow what are you doing tonight i've asked you four times you've asked me a million times and you're like floral like help you know that i bought dresses and then i had like my hampton's dresses

you know them like they're floral there was two we need to like match energies are you going like casual like what's the vibe We'll do a try on after.

Right.

Like, because I need to try and I want to try on the purple dress again now that I got like the matching cardigan.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

So, we need to plan.

I need to like blow out my hair.

I have so much to do.

Much to do.

And we have to do the toast.

It's Thursday, which just means good vibes all around.

Good normal vibes.

These are two normal people who aren't suffering from like cognitive decline.

Yes.

Energy today.

I feel like the White House.

Energy today.

Cognitive normability.

Yeah.

Neurotypicality.

No silliness.

Okay.

I make no promises,

but let's let the chips fall where they may.

Well, I feel like that's what we've been doing up until this point.

And it hasn't been getting us like in a good place.

For sure, but we've been doing it throughout our lives.

So true.

And that got us to a good place, but maybe there were too many chips and they were just like falling errantly.

They were falling errantly.

Errant chip fallage is a real problem.

You just had a mouthful there, sister.

Nobody wants to talk about the real issue.

It's so true.

And that's why we started this platform and this podcast to get into the real issues.

Right.

Like the errant falling of the chips.

errant falling of the chips we are anti i can feel it's like going down like a moldy spiral i think we need to reel it in we sound like kamala

literally that's kind of what mold energy does but the thing is much like much like kamala like if you actually listen we are saying something Yes, that we are against an errant falling of the chips.

If that doesn't mean something to you, I can't help you.

And like a lot of people were like, the coconut tree, she's not actually saying anything.

She actually is.

Yeah.

Something incredibly profound, but you just obviously can't understand it because you just fell out of a a coconut tree.

Right.

Sad for you.

We were there last week, but we've picked ourselves back up and now we exist in the context of all in which that came before us.

And let us be like a sort of role model and an inspiration to those who have just fallen out of a coconut tree.

Like it, hashtag, it gets better.

It gets better.

And we're going to leave it at that before we too fall out of a coconut tree once again.

Okay.

It's contagious.

That's beautiful.

Thank you.

I feel like we should get into

if we don't.

If we don't, this is the part where we could really slip into something here is the pre-fast five banter that's where let me tell you i love slipping into things with you i know i know why we can't like i get it it's just the slope is too slippery these days we've always been able to control ourselves so true but it's maybe it's that summer slip that slip and slide yeah but we are slippering into dangerous waters so so without further ado these serious normal girls are going to deliver the fast five stories that you need to know and the fast five stories that you need to know are brought to you by State Farm.

So thank you so much to State Farm for sponsoring today's episode.

We know our toasters can agree that nothing feels better than a personal win.

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And at one point, like people thought you were annoying for it, but then in the end, everybody was really happy for you.

You know that whether it's small, whether it's simple, like just taking a nice walk, you know, or beating mold, something as large as beating mold.

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Thank you, Claudia.

You're welcome.

I also feel like at risk of slippery and slipping into silliness, like we didn't even talk about your birthday.

Oh my God, yes.

Okay, well, because like the mold poisoning ruined it, but we still had such a nice day.

We just like chilled family day.

We tried to like go out and like, you know, like shop and like get coffee.

And we thought maybe the fresh air would help with the mold poisoning, but in fact, it made it a lot worse.

We were so much worse than we've ever been.

We tried to have like a a leisurely ladies who lunch afternoon, and it was just not happening.

We came back and like everybody in the house fell asleep.

Like we were seriously not okay.

We had dinner reservations.

We ended up just staying in.

Ben made such a feast.

It was so good.

Like that was really a great top off to like me being seriously.

I reverted to old turdy for the last 10 days.

Like the second we all got in the house together.

It's something about A, being with you guys, B, like being sick, but also having two birthdays.

And then C, like something about living in a house, like the accessibility to a kitchen, like the kitchen being the center of the home.

It's just all being together.

You're so not like focused on yourself and your goals.

And I, I forget when I'm like just walking past the kitchen and grabbing a cookie.

Like, I forget that that's not what we do.

No, like the past couple of days, like, I seriously, for breakfast, had like cookies and brownies.

Like, not okay.

I reverted to old turdy.

I'm so back.

I'm back and better than ever.

You need to, if you see me like eating a cookie, like slap it out of my hand.

Okay.

And also stop bringing fat things into the home.

Like, you brought in those brown butter cookies from that market that you loved.

They were so unbelievably delicious.

And then you let me buy that brownie at the other farm stand.

Like, stop.

I'm the person who goes to a fruit stand and buys a brownie.

Like, no.

Okay.

You're right.

You're right.

We need to help each other.

I've been really spiraling, but not today.

No, same.

We're normal, we're skinny, yeah.

Like, we are thin

of sound mind.

Like, I don't know how much weight someone-that's our mantra, our daily affirmations.

I am skinny, I am sound of mind, I am skinny, I am normal, I am sound of mind.

And I don't know, like, possibly how much weight someone could gain in 10 days, but like, whatever the max was for a person of my height and weight, I did.

Okay, even though I did stay on top of my workouts, which is like surprising, I was running, I did soda methods.

I was like, I did soda.

Last time you saw us, we were headed off to Sodo.

It was amazing.

A couple of sick sisters working out, and like, we're back.

Yeah.

I am normal.

What was the second one?

I am thin.

What was the third one?

Normal.

Skinny, thin, normal.

Sound of mine.

I'm sound of mind.

I am normal.

I'm skinny.

I'm sound of mind.

I'm normal.

I am skinny.

And if I say it enough times, maybe it'll be true.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And, but the sourdough is not getting in your way, is it?

No, not at all.

I actually think based on like, you know, the bar has been so lowered for like my healthy eating, like this gut gut healthy bread is the least of my problems.

Okay.

Okay.

Good.

Good, good.

But it does make me just want to like eat other like hard.

No, no, it's good.

I'm not blaming the bread.

Yeah.

Like Jackie made me a sourdough loaf yesterday that had like my age scribbled in it.

So it was like 13.

It was so cute.

It was so cute.

I don't have a loaf proofing right now.

That's good.

We have a busy day.

Yeah.

I was going to make a loaf.

I want to start giving them away because I want to make one for Hilary Soto.

Like she deserves it.

And I bought like bags to put them in.

Well, we're seeing her tomorrow.

So if you could

step in, she would love that.

Yeah.

Okay.

Now we.

But she listens to the toast, so like it wouldn't be a surprise.

No, I told her.

I told her I was going to bring her a loaf.

She didn't ask for one, but she'll be getting one.

I know she does like sandwiches.

Yeah, that's like how she likes to.

She does like sandwiches.

That's her thing.

Yeah.

You know, her fitness capital, everything she's earned back.

She likes a sandwich.

That's my kind of girl.

Now, are you ready for the fast five stories?

I guess.

It would be very normal and sound of mind of us to do.

It would be.

So therefore, we will do it because that is who we are.

Correct.

Our first story, Olivia Munn and John Mulaney got married in an intimate home wedding ceremony.

So Olivia Munn and John Mulaney are married.

The actress and comedian secretly tied the knot over the weekend at a friend's home in New York State, people reported on Wednesday.

Per the outlet, only their two-year-old son Malcolm, who they welcomed in November 2021, and a witness were in attendance.

I think there was like a, you know, a massive campaign for me to hate these two, and it did not work.

Like, I'm sorry to everyone involved.

Like, I stand.

And I think it's cute.

And it's so unfortunate for that other girl, you know?

It is so unfortunate for that other girl.

It's, it is.

Like, Adam Marie, like, she has, she has my deepest sympathies, but that, I'm holding space for two truths.

Like, it's really sad for her, but it's nice for these two, you know?

And that's just life, you know?

It's really,

they tried to make me hate John Mulaney because of Olivia Munn, but I never hated Olivia Munn.

I feel like a lot of people did.

I never did.

No, and the proof is in the pudding, as we always say.

Like, you want to.

act shysty in your personal life.

You know, maybe timelines aren't adding up, but like you get married and you have a child together and you seem to be really in love and you go through hard things and you're there for each other and you're together through the shitstorm of the media and the public like i'll support you yeah yeah these two

are unfortunately for a lot of people the real deal unfortunately for you they love each other so much they have been through a lot obviously like public

drama is really tough to get through but he i loved his i'm not even like a john mulaney fan people like die for his comedy thing it's like the greatest thing i never really like was into it but his special after you know becoming america's most hated comedian and then also relapsing in his sobriety was amazing i think it's called baby j i loved it so much now i like like, I don't really, I'm not even like a fan of his comedy.

I just like him as a person.

And of course he coined my favorite phrase, like ability is a prison.

How could I not like him?

And I think that's why you would be in a prison with him because you like him.

Correct.

Also, she was just battling breast cancer.

Right.

And then this whole, like, there's a lot that these two have been through.

And I'm sorry.

Like, I stand.

I really, I ship.

I think they're OTP.

Yeah.

So.

Sorry, haters.

Sorry, haters.

And sorry, Anna Marie.

Like, I imagine that was really hard for you.

But it's also probably annoying.

It's giving Jennifer Anniston, like, when you can't talk about a couple without without talking about the girl he dated before.

Yeah, just because she's so like integral to their story.

And I do feel like with Jennifer Anniston, like that was like not her choice.

She was like, seriously, please leave me out of this.

Like it was just like literally every magazine cover at the time, those tabloids had such power over people.

And it was just anytime it was about Britain and James, she was like, I don't feel that way about AMT.

No, I feel like she kind of like lives to that narrative.

Keep me in it.

Yeah.

Like, don't forget about me.

I'm a part of this.

Yeah.

I was supposed to be in the video.

I was supposed to be in this marriage.

Yeah.

No, and not, she was in the marriage.

It is really sad like when somebody like doesn't have kids with someone.

And then like the second they get into a new marriage, like they have kids.

Cause it seemed like these two people didn't want kids.

I remember him saying that on his Comedians and Cards episode.

So it's like, well, what changed, you know?

Yeah.

Unless it was like an accident, which yeah.

And then he like realized, oh.

Fatherhood is true.

I love fatherhood.

Love me.

Love me some Malcolm.

Right.

It's unfortunate, but I'm choosing to focus on the fortunate, which is these two clearly love each other.

Celebrities getting married with not a single other person.

Like that is so legitimate, you know?

Tell me you love each other without telling me.

Well, they did.

And they told each other that they loved each other.

I'm actually, like, I'm happy for them.

Sorry.

I like them.

What are you going to do?

I think that's fair now.

And now, like, it's fine.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story?

I feel like we're breezing through, but yeah.

Major pregnancy news.

Wait, who?

Gypsy Rose Blanchard.

Oh, yeah.

Has announced her pregnancy on Tuesday with her boyfriend, Ken Urker.

So Gypsy Rose Blanchard views her newly announced pregnancy as a fresh start and a way to break a cycle of abuse.

A day after sharing the news that she and her her boyfriend will soon welcome their first child, the 32-year-old TLC stars opening up about the impending arrival of her bundle of joy.

In an interview with people, she spills the beans on how she found out she is pregnant, why she's so excited to become a parent, and what steps she plans to take

to give her son or daughter a better life than she had.

She said, all the things that I wanted in a mother, I want to give to this baby.

My mother told me that I was never going to get married, raise a family, have kids, or do any of that.

So to be here standing on my own two feet and expecting my first baby, that's something I've reached as an achievement and a personal goal.

I thank God every day that I'm now having this second chance at life with a kid of my own.

No, it's so cute.

There is like so much to unpack here.

Somebody tweeted something so true.

It was like, Chipsy Rose's daughter has the opportunity to do the funniest thing ever.

Do you get it?

Which is what?

Kill her mother.

Like, why would that be the funniest?

Bulling up.

Because let me tell you why.

I'm happy for GRB.

I think she's a nice girl.

And I think like she did what she had to do in that moment, you know, all those years ago.

But it is really crazy that there's like a people exclusive about this like murder.

Like at the end of the day, like she did, she was a co-conspirator on a murder and was that murder justified 1000

but it is really crazy like the way we're talking about her it's like and i also i don't know and i'm happy for grb but i do feel like she's probably stunted in many many ways and like i don't know how old she is but she's probably a lot younger emotionally and mature wise she's 32.

I would say she probably is the emotional like in like a maturity of like an 18 year old.

For sure, but she's also been to prison and like that kind of wise.

Oh, that's so true.

You've got to be sound of mind, tough.

Skinny.

Yeah.

I just, I do worry.

Like, I do.

Oh, I do think motherhood will be complicated for her.

Because at first, I'm like, I forget the GRB crime.

I'm just like, oh, this media darling, like

the socialite, the it girl of the moment.

But then I forget, like, no, her fame, like, she has famously has like mommy issues to say the least.

Correct.

And so motherhood is, it's going to be an interesting journey for her.

But I agree with her that it's a chance to break the cycle.

It's a second chance and it's a beautiful thing.

So I wish her her well

and I hope for the best.

Do you think that GRB was trying to get oh no?

I think I read that it was an accident.

Like she wasn't trying to get pregnant.

Got it.

Because like,

do you think she like, I don't know like a lot about her education.

Like, do you think she knows about sexual education and

health?

I think so.

Does she have health class in prison?

No, but she's like on TikTok.

She's a woman of the world.

There's ways to self-educate, especially like if you have a man.

Yeah.

You just want to know stuff.

Yeah.

This is so crazy.

crazy like for real yeah and her announcing it like directly after we wrapped tuesday's episode was an extremely uncool thing to do was rude but i i have felt like she's been threatened by us so it makes total sense yeah well i'm happy for her and what do you what do you think ryan makes of all of this ryan is like loving the very modicum small modicum of fame he has.

His social media is like seriously one of the most horrifying places on the internet.

I wouldn't recommend anybody goes and seeks it out.

It did come my way.

Like I didn't actively seek it out.

It just came across my desk.

And he was just like reaching out to his fans and saying like, thanks to everybody who's being hashtag Team Ryan.

And it's like, we're, that's not a thing.

That's not a thing.

Um, that hasn't been.

Not even Team Gypsy is a thing because it's just like, you guys are not a thing.

Like, she's moved on so swiftly.

Like,

with the guy she told you not to worry about.

Yeah.

But I think he's singing, that should be me.

Right, he's holding your hand.

Jackie.

That should be me in people, mag.

I love that.

Yeah.

Jackie, he's kind of the Anna Marie Tendler of this situation.

Yeah.

And that sucks for Anna Marie Templar.

So sending well wishes to everyone and

wishing Gypsy a

healthy and fabulous pregnancy.

Yeah.

How far along was she?

I'm not sure.

Cool.

I feel like it's probably

she's doing January.

Oh, God.

Here we go again.

The math.

Do it.

You're the only one on this couch who's able to.

So it's July.

January is.

Seven to one.

Like six months.

So she's six.

She's four months in.

So she's just out of her first trimester.

Okay, good.

Good for GRB.

Like, seriously, what does GRB name her kid?

Like, her name is so iconic, Gypsy Rose.

Does she do a double, like a hyphenate too, Gypsy Rose?

I think so.

Gypsy Rose Jr.

GRJ?

I love that.

What was her mother's name?

I'm not sure.

It was like something ugly.

Yeah, like I said.

Dee Dee.

Like, does she honor her mother in any way?

I know

she has a complicated relationship with her mother.

She's spoken about that too.

I would imagine she does.

That's

it's complicated.

It's complicated.

Yeah.

So, Mazotov to Gypsy Rose.

Mazaltov to Gypsy Rose.

Are you ready for our next story?

I am.

Joe Jonas details making his most personal music for a solo album amid his divorce from Sophie Turner.

I really can't.

I cannot keep up with the Jonas brothers.

Like, solo, non-solo, breaking up.

Like, seriously.

I love my band.

I hate my band.

Literally.

That's from Olaf's

little mini-series when he's he's like, you know, the series that Olaf does on Disney Plus where he recaps other Disney movies.

Why would I know that?

I don't know, because it's like Olivia plays it a lot.

And when he's talking about Moana, he's like, I love my grandma.

I hate my grandma.

So now when you're like, willy-nilly, I love my band.

I hate my band.

That's exactly what the Jonas brothers feel.

Not Kevin.

Kevin would never.

We know Kevin loves his band and he's always there when they're ready to come back to him.

I love my brothers.

I hate my brothers.

But I am like ready for Kevin to like sort of blow up on these two.

Like it's like enough ready.

Kevin has been the stable force for years and just like taking what he could get, hosting claim of fame, claim to fame while the others like figure out their, their issues.

Yeah.

And it's seriously, it must be exhausting.

For Danielle, too, it's like he can't have a stable career because two other brothers are so unstable.

Yeah.

It's like enough.

Find stability in the instability.

That's beautiful.

Almost like he finds comfort in the, in the discomfort.

Yeah.

I like that.

So Joe Jonas has a solo album on the way.

I just want to say, I feel like we're doing such a good, clear job with you.

Like I feel so lucid.

I feel lucid, clear, also funny.

Like, I feel.

Like, we're not sacrificing the quality of the show for our stability.

Yeah.

But we're hanging on.

Today.

To normalcy.

Nothing's going to stop us anyway.

I'm holding on.

I'm strong.

Remember when she had a show?

That was an amazing time in television.

I remember we used to watch the OC and then Cheyenne.

Like, they were on at the same time.

Maybe even the same night.

Like, we would watch them back to back.

And that was probably one of the happier times in my life like perfect night perfect night also don't forget sunday nights oh

sunday night what did we watch on sunday nights growing up come on in olivia's bedroom brothers and sisters was on right after we turned it off

we'd turn it right off yeah of course yeah of course of course by the way on entourage oh my god it's so funny they actually reference Brothers and Sisters quite a few times because like those are the types of shows Johnny Drama would go out for.

And that was like the kind of peak for him.

It's actually so funny how they reference it.

Do people think about brothers and sisters, that moronic show, as much as we do?

Maybe the people who watch it even.

Nobody watched it.

There weren't like that was fake.

It was seriously.

Brothers and sisters was the first industry plant.

The first of its kind.

I do want to let you know, just like kind of a warning, I'm wearing your cardigan and I have a spray tan and I'm sweating a little bit.

Just like, do you know there might be some, I have to like kind of get, I have to get out ahead of the rumors.

Like, well, it's from Loft.

So if anyone from Loft Corp is watching, like maybe we could get another one.

This is a fabulous cardigan.

I know.

I bought it in every color.

Well, not even in a new color because it's going to be be like a sort of bronzy orange.

It's ombre.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, back to Joe Jonas and his solo album that's on the way.

He made the announcement on Jake Shane's podcast one

month after teasing his Work It Out single on social media.

He explained that he was working on a song when he realized he wanted it for himself, not the Jonas Brothers or DNCE.

Oh, he's like, by the way, that's like kind of crazy to admit.

Yeah, I was like, I think it's good to admit, like this is speaking to the health.

Yeah, okay, okay.

So far, it's reading healthy.

Okay.

I was like, I don't know what it's for, but I know I want to work on something.

I feel like the pull emotionally to work on music.

Well, that makes sense because he's got me through a lot and he's an artist and that's what they do.

Kevin and Nick gave their blessing, urging Joe to go for it while they worked on season three of Claim to Fame and a movie for Nick.

He said, so I had the window of time and I locked myself away.

We made an album in two to three weeks.

I'm just really excited.

It's the most personal music I have ever put out.

He did not share the record's release date.

He clarified it will be out later this year and revealed the title to Jake Shane while covering his mouth from the viewers.

Oh my God, that's so toast-coated.

The project will include some real beautiful ballads as well as songs about being a dad and songs about love.

He noted that the album consists of kind of everything, including songs about being better to yourself, like the first single, Work It Out.

Oh, I would have thought that's a song about, you know, trying to

not get divorced.

Hi, Romeo.

Just entered the chat.

Come here, love.

Hi, Rome.

What do you have to say about Joe Jonas' solo album?

Are you confused as well?

Are you and Bruno releasing an album?

Oh my God.

Called Best Friends Forever.

Let me say this: love to see podcasts making waves.

I personally, like, I have stopped caring about the Jonas brothers.

The will they, won't they?

You know, it's exhausting.

At one point, like, I actually really cared.

And as you know, like, my heart was firmly with Joe.

Um,

I don't care, you know, they're they're kind of pissing me off.

I understand.

Well, I'm reading this and I feel like it's not a bad omen for the Jonas brothers.

Like, cause instead of him wanting to work on solo projects, because it's like, I'm the biggest star in the group, it's like, like, no, I have a lot to say creatively.

It's just like, I'm feeling artistic right now and I want to put that this work of art.

And I think the band will be fine for it.

Now, maybe that's me being naive.

Maybe this is just the cycle and this is how it starts.

And maybe Nick is now a big movie star and he's going to get that movie itch.

And Joe is going to get a great reception to his solo music.

And he's like, so why would I split him in three?

Right.

Who knows?

And where does that leave Kevin?

For real.

Where the fuck does that leave Kevin hosting Claim to Frame with Frankie?

It's not right.

Yeah, but it's okay.

And he's going to make it anyway.

And I think that he's been saving his touring money.

And I think that he's going to be fine because he knew this day was coming because he's like, he knows the instability of the band.

I do actually agree with you that Kevin Jonas is probably like extremely financially savvy just because

he's had to be.

He's got to be.

He's in a tumultuous setting.

Kind of toxic.

Highs and lows.

Yeah.

And do you think this has anything to do with them calling off their European tour?

Remember?

Like that whole thing?

No.

I feel like maybe that was Nick's movie.

That makes sense.

Because they said it was like a crazy opportunity that none of them could, that they couldn't say no to, and that's why they had to call it off.

I feel like Nick's doing a major movie.

Yeah, do we care?

No.

Like, how major is it really going to be?

Like, movies aren't what they used to be.

So, unless he's in like Titanic, the sequel, not even unless he's in like Marvel.

Yeah.

That's the only sort of like opportunity these days that you can't pass out.

Yeah.

But I feel like, you know, Hollywood hasn't gotten that memo yet.

Right.

They still think like of movies.

Oh, I mean, the movie?

Right.

The talkies.

Right.

So we'll hear it one day.

Yeah.

I will say one thing about the Jonas Brothers, their personal issues to the side.

Like they do make amazing music.

Like I've never heard a Jonas Brothers song that was like actually really bad.

Yeah.

It's all fine.

It's all good.

It's all dandy.

Yeah.

Well, in some more new music news, are you ready for it?

Oh, no.

I don't think that you are.

So just give me like 35 seconds because I'm really not ready.

To get ready for it.

Okay.

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Our next story.

Or should I say Bert?

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Romeo, come here.

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Okay.

Ignore.

All right.

Our next story, speaking of new music, Katy Perry announces her first new album in four years.

So Katy Perry's new album, 143, will be released on September 20th.

Her single, Woman's World, produced by Dr.

Luke, releases today at 4 p.m.

Oh, I'm kind of excited.

I didn't realize that today was the day.

The wait is over.

Katy Perry's first new album in four years is set to release later this year.

On Wednesday, she confirmed that her sixth studio album titled 143 will debut on September 20th via Capital Records.

It'll be her first album since 2020's Smile, which was really forgettable.

And the first single and video Women's World releases today at 4 p.m.

Pacific time.

Oh, excuse me.

It's a weird time now.

Seven o'clock.

We'll listen as we're getting ready for our show.

An incredibly weird time.

Right?

Like people release music at midnight.

Right.

But I did want to say not to be so repetitive because this happened with Women's World, but there was another snippet of another Katy Perry song and it was really bad.

Like, I know I'm having deja vu because I said that about Women's World and everything I've heard about Women's World so far sing sounds so good.

No, and this is what she said about the.

This is

no, this is

women's world.

Yeah, this one's good.

The other one.

No, that's women's world.

It's a woman's world and you're lucky to be living in it.

Okay, I'm going to find it while you talk.

No, because you need to listen to what I'm about to say.

Oh, gosh.

Because it's a conversation.

Oh, it's a conversation.

Okay.

Yeah.

So the press release for the album shared that it's jam-packed with the kind of empowering and provocative pop anthems fans have come to love.

Love that.

143 is an album with a lot of heart and a lot of BPM.

So I feel like it is going so hard.

She's not trying something new.

Okay.

Out with the new, in with the old, of just like bop after bop.

And I feel like I personally

am going to enjoy it.

But, but, okay, I would agree with you based on that description if I hadn't heard this song.

Listen.

Oh, wait, no.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Excuse me.

I'm really being like so dumb.

I'm so sorry.

You said it.

Yes.

She went on like TikTok Live.

She shared that.

That's not a fan.

She was on TikTok Live.

And

who's singing on that?

I don't know.

I don't know.

It just sounds like a kid's bot version of something that's already out there.

It does.

But let me say, I think Women's World has the potential.

Just based on what I've seen, and it's so crazy because the first snippet I heard, I thought it was the biggest piece of shit on the planet.

I actually woke up today.

I was like, oh, it's not my birthday anymore.

How sad.

And I was like, what do I have to look forward to?

I was like, oh my God.

I knew Katy Perry's like new song was coming out right after my birthday.

I'm actually excited.

No, and also just remember, like today somewhere, like Cameron Wesgot's going to court.

Oh, wow.

Kind of of a big week for me and Katy Perry.

I also did forget to wish Erica Jane and Jessica Simpson a very, very happy birthday.

Your birthday buddies.

Yeah, because you know birthday buddies like actually mean the world to me.

Yeah.

So I think that this album is going to be really have some great moments.

I think that's what we need in the culture.

Even right now, when you think of like what the super popular songs are like Espresso and Please, Please, Please, like.

So amazing, such great songs.

Like not going to say, not going to knock them in any way, but like, do they make you want to get on the treadmill?

and do they make you want to like have a party?

Not necessarily.

They're just like they're vibey.

Yeah.

So I'm ready.

Like this feels to me like rain on me.

Yeah.

Lady Vaga has definitely been missing from the landscape of music because she's been working on other things, which is totally fine.

And I feel like all of the great pop divas who are maybe not.

working right now or just like not making music now this like synth sort of music is in and we're missing like those pussy popping anthems could not agree more and if there's anyone who can really bring that back into the culture like i do feel like like Katy Perry could do it.

And I do think like I'm going to blame Jack Antonoff.

I, by the way, I am also going to blame Jack Antonoff.

And I stand with you in that.

Yeah.

So also Dr.

Luke is working on the album.

Like we just kind of have to

talk about that really quickly.

And also.

That's really weird of Katy Perry.

You know, what's also weird is a lot of the promotional stuff that she's doing, like

and outings that she's been doing, she's been working very closely with Balenciaga.

Oh, okay.

That's really weird, especially from Katy Perry.

Like there are some people like who don't give a fuck.

Like let me say this.

The last person who worked with with dr.

Luke and people were talking about was Kim Petrus like Kim Petrus doesn't give a fuck like Kim Petrus isn't trying to like appease everyone Katy Perry's like very like UN ambassador like posting about unrack you know what I mean like

exactly it's just it's weird from like somebody who like clearly gives a fuck yeah to try and be like everything to everyone like well I think Katy Perry is very unscrupled and you hear it in her music and you see it it's just like she's so willy-willy every time she tries a new album she's like trying to do something new and be like

on the cusp of like whatever's happening in the music and i think right now she's going back to the things that worked for her which is exciting for me because that's when i loved her that's why like i'm excited for the music but like as a person and a branding she's all over the place yeah so it actually kind of makes sense that

she would work with Balenciaga.

Like she's really, she has no scruples.

No, she really just wants like success at any cost.

And that's like a dangerous game to play, like for real.

No, like it's very dangerous being Katy Perry.

Whew, chilling.

Yeah.

No, for sure.

So I'm just taking the art.

Like, I'm not looking much into the person because I'm not going to like what I see.

And I haven't liked what I've seen.

It's actually an amazing point to just separate the art from the artist.

And I'm looking forward to like a really good like pussy popping song.

And I just feel like every Katy Perry, like I evaluate it differently.

Like I like American Idol Katy Perry.

So do I.

I like that one.

Of course we love OG Teenage Tream Katy Perry.

Of course.

Like all of the pictures I'm seeing of even actually I like the promotional assets for same.

She looks amazing.

This album.

Like I think the pictures, the art is great.

It's very Lady Gaga.

Like everything so far is very, which is so crazy because Lady Gaga is one of like Dr.

Luke's biggest, probably most famous victims.

So he's giving all the songs he would have given to Lady Gaga to Katy Perry.

And like the art direction.

And it feels like an even bigger slap in the face, honestly, like from Katy Perry.

Like not only to be working with Dr.

Luke, who

Lady Gaga has been like so vocal about, but also like kind of coming for her brand.

Nobody can do it like Lady Gaga because Lady Gaga, say what you want about Lady Gaga.

Lady Gaga is an original.

Like everything she puts out is her own creative, her own ideas, her own music, her own everything.

Like from the wardrobe to the graphic, like you know, Lady Gaga had her finger in all of it.

Kitty Perry has like a team, a creative agency, just like telling her what, what's cool on TikTok.

Yes, in terms of like the brand of Katy Perry, but like she is a songwriter at her cat.

But even like her trajectory is so interesting because she was songwriting for songs.

She was a Christian artist, remember?

And that didn't get her.

Yeah.

No, she like seriously dropped Jesus in a second.

Like she kind of sold her soul.

Yeah.

It's sort of like a classic Hollywood tale.

It's a classic Hollywood tale.

And, like, we're seeing, it's giving soulless.

Sorry.

It is.

Which is so much worse than sensitive.

Is there a worse thing you could say about someone then than the things we're saying?

Katie Perry, like, seriously, can never listen to this episode.

But I'm so excited for the new music.

No, no, I'm really excited.

Like, I don't care if the artist has a soul.

I don't.

Is the music good?

Because does the music have a soul?

Yes.

The music has soul.

The music has soul.

Exactly.

I love that.

So I feel like also another artist would be like, oh, oh, I don't want these lady gaga hand-me-downs.

Someone would be too proud.

But Katy Perry got to a place in her, like an inflection point in her career where she seriously had no pride and she just had to like take what she could get.

Like good music is good music.

Why are you laughing so hard?

Like, it's just so funny because like, I'm not, I'm not even a hater.

No, I love Katie Perry.

You would never know.

I love it.

Like, I'm, I, at points in my life, I've been her biggest fan.

The first concert I ever went to was Katy Perry.

And Firework is like, it's the climb for me.

Like, it's such an important story.

So get me started on her documentary.

Like, I love.

Right, but the way that we're speaking is such a hater.

You couldn't be saying nastier things about her.

But we're speaking.

Sorry, the truth.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I have like seriously not a singular regret.

So we'll see you guys today, Thursday, 7 p.m.

Eastern time, 4 p.m.

You know what?

This is a reminder.

I saw something on TikTok once that like seriously made me laugh so hard that really made me cringe.

Katy Perry went on Chicks in the Office.

Oh, okay.

And some like Katie fan account was like, how could Katie go on this podcast?

And they pulled together like all the things.

Like they were just being funny like for like the past couple of years talking about katy perry um especially as it pertained to her situation with the real estate nuns yeah and they were like like seriously like my worst nightmare like putting together clips of like mean things they've said about katy perry and then like katy perry going on their show that's why we don't have guests that's why we don't have guests because so we can continue to speak our truth but seriously the chicks to the office girlies like had my heart in that moment because like that would happen to us that would except we don't have guests anymore so it literally can't yeah can't happen are you ready for our fifth and final story i thought that was it yeah um no but also women's world comes out today like we'll be listening as as we're getting ready for the show that's very funny that is fun maybe we could do like a listening 7 p.m siege 7 p.m should we walk out to women's world

i would say yes except our walkout is so it's so good no people don't know the words to women's world yet and there's something powerful about everybody in like one room singing the same song it's group therapy yeah

so our fifth and final story yep Pete Davidson and Madeline Klein break up after 10 months of dating.

I know love is lost.

I know you don't care.

I know you gotta subscribe.

Oh no, by the way, I do care.

Oh, really?

Yeah, when he was dating Chase Suey Wonders, like I didn't know who that was, like, so I actually didn't give a fuck.

Even when they like drove into a residential homemake, I still didn't care.

They still couldn't make me care.

But there's one, like, I actually love Madeline Klein, and she's so interesting to me in the sense that she's so famous.

And I feel like she, like, doesn't want to be.

Do you get the vibe?

No, I feel like.

She could be like way more thirsty, way more losery, way more annoying.

And she's like, not.

No, I feel like she wants to be serious.

And I feel like she enjoys her fame.

I don't know.

She feels really interesting to me.

I think she's done a really good job.

Same.

Of like parlaying OBS into like a a bigger thing.

And she's in every magazine.

She's on the

Mechala.

What does she do next?

She's in movies all the time.

I've been watching a movie.

I'm like, is that Madeline Klein?

Oh, good for you.

She really is like a chameleon in the way that she looks.

Like she looks different for everything.

Like a true actress.

I feel like she has potential to be like a big timey movie star.

Yeah.

She's a very good actress.

And I think

she's taking note.

I love that.

Yeah.

I do.

And she's also like a fashion girly.

Like as we progress, I want to say I still feel really sound of mind.

Do you?

It's because of the way you're sitting.

Sit up straight.

That's what I was going going to say.

That's why you've gotten to the loony bin.

Okay, okay.

I'm back.

Deep breath.

You were saying almost there.

You were saying, we're about to get through the show, like, in the most sort of normal way.

Yeah.

Like, low-key, we, we did it.

In a very classic way.

Pete Davidson and Madeline Klein have broken up.

They were first linked in September 2023.

So this would be a 10-month relationship, and now it is off.

I know it's so crazy because we all joke, like Pete Davidson has a million girlfriends.

I will say, like, every relationship he's in is like pretty long-term.

He doesn't like date people for one month.

No, but I do think that he has a 10-month limit.

You know, and it's like a break-in-the-market.

Do you think the girls are breaking up with him or he's breaking up with the girls?

It could be either, but I think it's something within Pete.

Like, maybe the girls are breaking up with him because at 10 months, like, he gets stirred crazy and it's like, oh, I can't deal with you anymore.

Or he's breaking up with them because like after 10 months, he gets bored.

But it's like Ramona Singer once said, like, in order to know someone, you have to spend a year with them.

Each season.

The great Ramona Singer.

That's very true.

She said he was four seasons with the person in order to get to know them.

What was she doing?

Who was she talking about when she said that?

No clue, but it really resonates.

No, I love that.

And don't you find.

And I'm sorry, that's something like only the OG women of Roney could deliver.

And I think, okay, sorry, I was about to want to tangent.

You continue.

Oh, okay.

We're not going down

Silly Street.

Yeah, no, exactly.

Silly Street.

Oh, girl, you're going down Silly Street.

Silly Street

where the silly

meets.

That's for me.

That's for me.

That's for me.

I don't know that song.

Easy.

Okay, Romeo's being very like, will they, won't they?

You like that?

Easy street.

No, I don't.

I don't like Annie.

I don't talk about Annie.

I don't not like Annie.

I don't know Annie in the way that you do.

Obviously, I know three bucks, two bags, one me.

Of course, I know the sun will come out.

It's a hard knock life.

I know the classics, but I don't know it in the way that like I think I know hairspray is the way that you know Annie.

No, but there's so much lore with Annie because you have to have seen all of them.

Yeah.

Which I have, by the way.

I've seen Quevenjanae Wallace.

I've seen Cameron Diaz.

I've seen Kathy Bates.

Like I've seen them all.

And the original.

I've seen the live.

But did you have you seen them all as an adult?

No.

No.

I saw Quevenjanae Wallace as an adult and live as an adult, which are arguably two of the worst ones.

But no, they're all good.

Yeah, they're all good.

That's what's so great about it.

Yeah.

Anyways, not to get off.

But do you feel like it's similar to hairspray in the sense like you, you can't remake it poorly?

Like it's just, it's always good.

Hmm.

Let Let me think about that.

Can you remake it poorly?

Like, you could.

But they don't.

But they haven't.

Yeah.

But they haven't.

So, all of that to say, we were just saying.

You were about to say something.

Simple street, silly street.

You were going to say, oh, you would have to say, Rony, Ramona Singer.

Who are we told?

What's the story?

Madeline Connie Davidson.

Yeah, okay.

So I feel like it's like he's in the fourth season and he doesn't like what he sees in the fourth season.

So he has the 10-month itch for sure.

But it's really like, aren't you embarrassed at this point?

It's like, Leo, like, date someone 26, like just to protect the cycle.

Yeah, just to like

throw us off.

I completely agree.

How predictable are you?

I'm surprised that these girlies, like, who are esteemed, successful, some of the most beautiful, attractive women in the world, like, want to be just one in a line.

Like, if I'm not inclined, I don't want Ariana Grande, Kim Kardashian.

It's a fabulous circle of women.

It's true.

Let's chill date, chill down.

It's honestly like it's a good badge of honor to be in.

And if they do have a little meetup, like, yeah, you could network for sure yeah

it's a sisterhood well I say screw sisterhood in this moment in this moment you say screw sisterhood in this moment I'm also saying screw my husband because Romeo's barking outside the door I let him in I got up if you guys saw that he was barking because he wanted to leave I let him out now he's barking he's being kind of like a like a fucking victim and he's pissing me off and like when I'm working Ben should be watching the children.

Yeah.

Well, Bruno's snoring.

Are we being boring because we're not being silly?

Yeah.

He loves me.

He said, you guys, I came to work and you're not interesting.

Like, you're not entertaining me.

Romeo, shut up.

I'm not getting up again.

Like, seriously, I'm tired.

The good news for Romeo is that the episode past five.

And by the way, we crushed it.

Like, seriously, that was such a good episode.

We were funny.

We were witty, but we were clear.

We were lucid.

We were on point.

Yeah.

I want to bring this lucidity into the rest of the day.

And to every episode for the rest of Swirly Summer.

Agreed.

We're so excited for our show tonight.

I cannot wait to see all the swirlies who have come near and far to the West Hampton Beach Performing Arts Center, as we're calling it the Wubba Back.

And we'll see you guys tonight, and we'll see you back on the toast tomorrow, which is going to be fabulous.

So, thank you guys so much for listening to the toast, the millennial morning show where we deliver the fast-fast stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

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I feel so good.

Like, really.

Hope you guys have an amazing day, and we'll see you tomorrow for Friday.

Love you.

Bye.