Growing Up & Getting Older: Wednesday, December 13th, 2023

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Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the chest and happy Wednesday.

It's hump day.

It doesn't feel like a hump day.

I don't know why, but it doesn't.

It's dirty.

It doesn't feel like a hump day for me because I'm doing Saqqara this week and it's supposed to start on a Monday, but I started it on Sunday.

So it's like been one, two, three days.

So for me, every day this week has felt like the day ahead.

It's a terrible way to be.

Next time I do it, I'm starting on a Tuesday so that every day feels like the day behind.

One thing about Jax, she ain't gonna follow the rules.

She ain't.

No, this, this wasn't even about breaking the rules because actually one thing about me is I am gonna follow the rules.

Like, you know, it kills me to start on a Sunday when it begins on a Monday.

But I'm like, why not start bettering myself?

The sooner the better, right?

TSTB.

But now I'm punished because my whole week is thrown off.

Yesterday I thought it was Wednesday.

Today I think it's Thursday.

And that's a horrible feeling to me.

Terrible.

Thinking that, like, tomorrow I'm going to think it's Friday, and it's not going to be Friday.

That's the saddest existence on the planet.

Right.

So that's why next time I'm going to start on a Tuesday.

That way, on Tuesday, I feel like it's Monday.

And then the weekend will just sneak up on me.

Life hack.

Today is kind of a major day for me.

Pero, why?

Don't say pero, please.

Please.

Pero, one R.

Oh, are they not spelled the same?

I think Pero Dog is two Rs.

Regardless, don't use that word in my presence.

Okay.

But llama.

Llama.

Because today I have a ski lesson.

Oh my gosh, I'm so excited for you, for me, for the community.

And for the Patreon.

I started vlogging last night.

I'm so excited to watch this Patreon.

Patreon and I'm really curious to see how it is.

You are going to an indoor ski lesson.

Yes.

So I talked about this on the Patreon a bunch, but we're going skiing next week for our family vacation.

And like, I want to do it.

Like I want to do it, but I don't want to go there with everyone.

And you, Jack, you, Ben, Margo, everyone knows how to ski.

I don't want to like be alone on the loser hill with an instructor.

So I've decided to take matters into my own hands and proactively take a lesson today.

I have a two-hour private lesson.

I am excited.

I'm also nervous because I am going to have to ask the instructor to to film me for Patreon.

And like that will be humiliating.

But listen, I've committed to this craft and these are the things I have to do.

I bought a microphone too.

Like

I am nervous.

Are you going to put the microphone like in your ski jacket?

I'm going to clip it.

Yeah.

I love that.

Yeah.

So I am scared.

I'm excited.

I'm nervous.

And I'm just like, I think it's something like I could be good at.

I don't know why.

Like I am kind of like limber.

Yeah, no, you're not not athletic.

It's not out of the cards for you to be good at it, but you're going to have to be really patient.

Like it's going to be torture for a while.

Like your shins are going to hurt.

Everything hurts.

The equipment is like so uncomfortable.

And you might not even love it today because it's not like you're skiing and the slopes of Course Cheval.

Like it's not going to be that amazing, but you're sowing the seeds.

Just remember that.

Yeah.

Okay, like you just like maybe not excited about it.

No, I'm just I want to set expectations.

Like today's not going to be the best day ever.

It's going to be hard work, dirty, but nothing worth having comes without hard work.

Should I try snowboarding?

No.

Okay.

This looks so much easier.

It's like not.

I know.

But like, and it's like, it's not your vibe.

Like, if I was just a girl who like shredded gnar on her snowboard, like, oh my God, it'd be so chill.

You could still shred the gnar on your skis.

Yeah.

No, I just want to be like Rachel Green.

You'll get there.

So that's me today, and I'm excited.

I'm excited for you.

Please keep us posted.

Please Patreon as much as you can.

I will.

Well, that's my viewing experience tonight.

You'll see

in the vlog, I literally could not find anyone to go with me, like, because it's in the middle of the day, and everyone I asked was like, no, ma'am, I have a job.

So you'll see.

I don't want to spoil how it ended, but I did find accompaniment.

I'm excited.

It's not that shocking, but.

Is it Satchel?

No, I asked Margaret to come with me.

I don't want to spoil the vlog.

I don't want to spoil the vlog.

Okay, okay, okay.

Okay.

This is really exciting.

Guess I'll be watching some TV tonight, even though I've been reading at night.

I don't have enough time to read, but I'm loving the book I'm reading, which is Elon Musk's biography called Elon Musk.

And I only got like 30 to minutes to an hour to read at night, but like it's like I can't put it down.

I want to like keep reading.

Right now I'm at the point in his life where he marries his first wife.

Just throw back.

And everybody's like, don't do it, Elon.

It's crazy to like read that.

They're like, you're going to be miserable.

You're side.

Like, why?

Just because marriage is miserable or no they were a toxic couple oh bad couple like his mother was like you'll never know like a day of joy oh my god

but he did it anyway that's so Elon yeah so

it's the book is so good it's so long I've been reading it for a few nights I'm only at like eight percent it's probably gonna take me until 2024 to finish it but I'm thoroughly enjoying it I am reading a fabulous thriller that's kind of like the thriller of the moment you would love it Like, it's so funny.

It's called What Is None of This Is True by Lisa Jewell.

Like, everyone's reading it right now.

Oh, she's a girly.

Yeah.

I don't think I've ever read one of her books, but they're always being recommended.

I don't think I have either, but I'm loving it.

Like, I had an hour left last night and like, it was just 11 and I really wanted to finish, but between my eye twitch, like, I need my sleep.

And then you have to prioritize sleep.

And Ben has been, you know, Ben's been having a rough time.

I feel like the first couple of days post-theo, like, were very me-centric.

And Ben was very strong for me, but he's kind of breaking down.

So I need a thing is kind of like a solitary activity and he needs you, he needs your companion.

He needs my full attention.

So I gave it to him.

But everyone just send positive thoughts Ben's way.

He's struggling.

You know, he's a strong person.

He's also a person, you know,

who hasn't dealt with a lot of grief.

So this is all new to him.

And he's struggling.

It's hard.

It is hard.

And, you know, Ben took his role as a, as a dog dad very, very, very seriously.

And it was something he prided himself on.

He was an amazing, is an amazing father.

So he's struggling.

I'll send some good vibes his way.

Thank you.

Some funny memes.

He's on my meme distro list.

I know.

He's one of my favorite people to send memes to because there are so many memes I see that are like, this is for Ben.

Whether it's a golf meme, inappropriate, something, toilet humor, Ben.

Yeah, Ben covers like a wide gamut of dumb humor.

I'm going to double down on my meme distro to cheer him up.

That, I think, would go a long way.

Plus, a sweet text message.

A sweet text message, yeah.

From the heart.

On talk to text.

He would love that.

From the talk to text heart.

So we've got a great show today.

There is a story going around that I, like not to center myself,

was freaking out.

Like when I woke up this morning, everyone was tagging me in this story on TikTok.

I sent it to you.

Did you add it to the stories?

Yeah.

Why was everyone tagging me and freaking out?

Oh my God, what do we, you have to talk about this on the podcast?

What is Luke doing?

Luke, Luke, Luke.

And honestly, I was like, I don't even know how we could talk talk about this on the podcast because I feel like I'm missing a chunk of the story.

But then Luke Homes King immediately responded, jumped to action.

Oh, they sent it to you before his response.

Yeah, just the news story that it was like a local news story that went viral about Luke Homes and then that elicited a response from him.

So I didn't even know what I could say on this show because everything that was said in that news story went against everything I think I know about Luke Homes.

Got it.

Okay, so we'll get into it.

That is our first story.

So without further ado, did it do, here are the fast five stories that you do need to know.

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Great.

Our first story, the aforementioned Luke Combs drama.

Luke Homes has responded to the $250,000 Tumblr lawsuit against a Pinellas County woman.

Okay, let me just, you don't need to read it.

I'll tell you.

So this local news story like went a little viral.

And it went viral on TikTok and, you know, really blew up in the Illinois community.

So much so that Luke Hombs responded.

And what the local news story had portrayed was a very sad story of a woman whose full-time job is, she makes tumblers, you know, custom tumblers.

And she went to a Luke Homes concert over the summer and had such a great time that she started making Luke Hombs tumblers.

And she's not, you know, a billion-dollar business.

She had said that she had made about $380 in profit from her Luke Homes sales on Amazon.

Then this woman experienced some sort of health issue and was in the hospital for a very long time.

And when she got home, she saw in her email, not only her email, her junk email.

Like it went to spam because in Illinois, there's a new law that allows like judgments and settlements to be done over email, which is like kind of fuck.

This woman didn't know she was being sued, didn't know that she lost, and found out after coming home from the hospital via email that she owed Luke Hombs $250,000 and that she even just had found out then that she was being sued for copyright infringement by Luke Combs Incorporated.

So Amazon froze her account.

She has $5,500 in there.

That's money she needs to pay her medical bills.

It's money she needs to pay Luke Hombs.

It was just a terrible story and really a story that made no sense because if we know one thing about Luke Combs, he's not a greedy person.

You know, he's one of those artists who makes his tickets as cheap as possible.

He doesn't do dynamic pricing.

He's always giving away free tickets.

He's really not this like capitalist king, you know?

He makes a lot of money and it's enough for him.

He doesn't do the most.

I know.

He doesn't, you know, milk every last drop of money from his career.

Like he makes a very, very good living and he's happy with it and he does a lot for his fans.

So the notion that he would A, sue a fan.

Kind of makes no sense.

The notion that he would sue someone who's really, yes, technically the law wasn't on her side.

She was breaking the law.

But the fact that he would sue a fan who's made so little money off his back, like it just, it didn't make sense.

And this woman was just very, she was pathetic.

Like she doesn't have $250,000.

She has all these medical bills.

She had like a heart attack.

And she's a huge Luke Combs fan.

Like it was just, the whole story made absolutely no sense.

So everyone's tagging me in this this morning.

Like literally, I'm scrolling Instagram, seeing everyone tag me.

And then two seconds later, Reactive King, Luke Combs makes a TikTok and immediately addresses it.

What he said was he he woke up at five in the morning to go to the bathroom.

He's really being very descriptive.

He brought his phone.

He brought his phone and everyone, I guess, was sending him the story.

He had no idea what it was about.

He calls his management, he calls his attorneys, and it turns out he has one of these companies that basically scours the internet for like international corporations that make millions of dollars selling counterfeit merch.

A lot of artists do this.

It's never meant to attack like a small Etsy shop or a fan account.

It's for these big international companies that make millions and millions of dollars.

He's unpleased.

Like someone could just say they're the Luke Combs official merch.

Right.

That happens all the time.

And so someone needs to be out there policing that.

So he has a company that does that for him.

He doesn't monitor it.

He just knows that this company is taking care of these big, big fake companies.

But in their, you know, in their work scouring the internet, they, they did sue this lady.

And he was like, I called the local news station, asked them to put me in contact with her.

I called my attorneys.

And here's what he did.

He was like, I had no idea about this.

I would never do that.

You guys know I love my fans.

I would never sue a fan.

And he said, I'm not a greedy person.

Like, this isn't what I do.

But to rectify the situation, you know, she had that $5,500 in her Amazon account that she could not get out.

And that's money she needs to live and money she needs to pay her bills, but because of the lawsuit, her account has been frozen.

He was like, I called her.

I know she needs that $5,500.

I'm sending her $11,000 today.

That's done.

That's taken care of.

I don't believe he will be pursuing, you know, the $250,000 that he owes her.

He's not interested in taking money from this woman.

But he also put up a Tumblr for sale on his website.

And all the proceeds of that will be going to this woman who's obviously just fallen on hard times with her small business being frozen and then this medical issue that she had.

So he's releasing like an exclusive Tumblr.

All the proceeds will be going to her.

So she's not going to have to pay him back.

She just got $11,000 from Luke and he's creating like a revenue stream for her

for this difficult time that she's in.

Like, I knew it.

Like, I knew it.

And I love how he was just so directed.

And he invited her and her family to a concert, and he's just doing the most.

He's doing that.

So we knew he would do that.

No No one was more upset aside from the woman.

No one was the second most upset about this situation.

Than Luke.

Than Luke.

That his name was being used and this is what was happening to a fan of his.

Not on his watch.

Right.

He's not an artist who's like notoriously litigious.

He's not an artist who's like greedy and is always just like doing things for money.

I feel like he probably could be way more.

like greedy and rich and famous if he wanted to be, but he's just happy and content with the amount of money he makes, which I'm sure is a lot.

So the story made no sense to me.

And his explanation was good enough for me.

I'm, that's my king right there.

Like he rectified it.

He went above and beyond.

It's not even like he dropped the case.

Like he went above and beyond for this woman.

And I loved his direct approach.

He didn't, you know, release a written statement that took hours to write.

He said, I found out at five in the morning.

It's now 7:30.

I've passed, I've spent the last two hours figuring out what the fuck is going on.

Direct, speaking to camera, speaking to his fans.

It wasn't super tailored.

He, you know, he was saying, um, and like because he was just speaking in the moment.

And that's how you handle a scandal.

Yeah, the situation is rectified, but also he hadn't done anything wrong.

So it's not like he was pursuing this woman and now he needs to backtrack.

Like, this happened outside of his control.

He controlled the situation.

It's rectified.

Now she's having a great day.

Medical bills are paid.

Tumblr on the site.

Like

something good came out of it.

Something good came out of it.

And I just knew it.

Like, I never doubted Luke for a second.

I'm like, I don't think that this is true.

Yeah, I feel like if we had reported on the story before his response, we would be like, this feels weird.

Like, let's wait.

Let's give him the benefit of the details.

And the details.

Yeah.

I don't think we would have jumped on hashtag Luke is overparty.

Hashtag Luke is never over party.

Luke will never be over party.

Luke has never been over party.

Like, no.

Luke could never be over party.

You wish he was, but he never will be over party.

Luke should never be over party.

Luke shan't ever be over party.

Luke can't ever be over party.

And Luke won't ever be over party.

Period.

Cap.

No cap.

Luke is bussing, okay?

Luke is bussing.

Luke is bussing.

No cap.

And that's how the cookie crumbled on the tumbler today.

Yeah, I knew he would make it right.

Not only did he make it right, he went above and beyond.

Are you going to get a tumbler?

Oh, sure.

I am like kind of in my tumbler era

because like now I have like my new kitchen and I'm really like me and Bennett always, you know, makes his green juice in the morning and like I have a coffee.

Like we have, we have cups, you know, we're like a cups house.

When we went to David Buster's

last weekend for some fun in the sun, we won so many tickets.

We got two tumblers.

So I have that.

I have like, I kind of have like tumblered out, you know?

A Stanley.

No, my Stanley, I have my special LaCroix tumblers.

Like, I have a lot of tumblers.

I feel like Trisha Paytas, like people who collect tumblers.

It's a thing.

That you're one step closer to being like a mama bear.

So I had this discovery on the toilet yesterday, and I think it's incredibly profound.

I'm so glad I just remembered it because I think it's true.

Growing up is becoming the person you used to make fun of.

100%.

There was something recently that I was thinking about doing and it's like, if you ever told me that I was going to be doing that, or maybe it was just like,

I forget what, maybe it was just beef stew in general.

Like the way I'm so passionate about beef stew.

And like growing up, if you were like, we're having beef stew for dinner, I'd be like, yuck.

Yeah.

Yuckvom.com.

Emancipate me now.

Now it's like beef stew.

So that's what gets me going.

Yeah, no, I don't forget what made me have the discovery, but I think it was like, I think I was reading like inspirational quotes and they really kind of moved me.

And I was thinking about maybe even posting one.

And I realized like I have fully become a person I used to make fun of.

Like even I have this crazy memory and it's just such a testament to how immature I was.

I remember watching The Real Houses of Atlanta, like a million years ago, and Kenya Moore's dog had passed away, like, very tragically, very suddenly.

And she was like bawling with the other woman.

And I was like, this woman is not okay.

Like, she was acting like seriously, like, like a person died.

And she was just

inconsolable.

And I remember thinking, like, this is insane.

And that's me now.

Like, I cry three times a day.

Like, I, I am the person I used to make fun of.

Yeah.

But that's growth.

But I also, also, I feel like there are so many things that are like cliche things, but then for a reason.

Like I feel like for mamas, it's like, you know, the claw clip, the tumbler.

And it's like, no, you don't just like go and seek those things out because you feel like you're supposed to have them.

It's like, no, I need to just get my hair up really quick.

Like I literally was, I was driving and I had like my claw clip, my tumbler.

Like I was in like mama mode, but it just, it happened to me.

I did not seek it out.

I'm so glad you brought that up as well, because let's talk about driving in a claw clip and how unbelievably annoying it is.

No, even driving in an updo bun, like I have to take my hair down and it's, it's like, I just styled it and put it up.

It's a hazard.

It's a hazard.

I was, I can't look to the left and the right.

My, I need like a, a seat that has a little hole indentation for my bun.

Yeah.

And what like, yeah.

Unless I could get my bun high enough, but that's not the kind of bun I want to be wearing.

I feel you.

It's really annoying.

That's how you get a headache.

Yeah, or you just have to sit like ramrod straight and then your bun is just like touch it it's it's quite uncomfortable i'm i'm so glad we're talking about this it's not an updo friendly activity and that is hard for me because i love an updo i know i'm even wearing a claw clip right now wouldn't be able to drive but you're right like things are cliche for a reason and i think part of growing up is realizing like the cringiness that you used to feel from clichés when you get older it's just like no it's more of an understanding Yeah, and then it becomes comforting.

It's like, I'm just part of the system.

You know, I'm like everyone else.

I'm just a human.

I'm just an ordinary girl.

Sometimes I'm lazy.

I get bored.

I feel scared.

I feel ignored.

Do I sound amazing?

I feel happy.

I get silly.

I chose

my own words.

There was one other like mama thing I was doing recently where I was having like a mama epiphany.

I was seeing myself from above.

Like, this is who she is now.

No, you know what it it was?

I posted yesterday.

I've been getting all these targeted videos.

My algorithm is targeting me for like homesteading videos.

Do you know what that is?

I saw you post about this, but I don't know what homesteading is.

So I don't know exactly what it is, but it's pretty much like people who make their own everything.

Everything.

Like they grow their own food.

They have their chickens.

They have their own eggs.

Like everything.

And they don't have to go to the grocery store.

It's a lifestyle of self-sufficiency.

It's characterized.

By substance agriculture, home preservation of food, and may also involve the small-scale production of textiles, clothing, and craft work for household use or sale.

Textiles.

Well, I make my own merch.

Oh my God, you are homesteading.

But yeah, no, like, and I think the first foray into homesteading, like the gateway, is a sourdough starter.

Oh, my God, that's so factual.

Have you seen these?

No, but I know that like sourdough starter is a gateway drug to like living a different life.

Feel like off the grid.

Yeah.

So I feel like I haven't been pulled and it's like I don't have to use sourdough every day, but now I'm like thinking back to like when you got me all those sourdoughs from Eli's.

Yeah.

And apparently like if you make your own sourdough, it's the best.

I don't know.

Maybe it's because I live in New York and I'm blessed and privileged to live amongst the most, the finest bakeries, French bakeries.

You know, I don't see a need to do what other people are doing so well.

You can't homestead in New York.

You like don't even have the space to do it.

And everything is about convenience.

So it's not the place to do it.

But in this video that I posted yesterday, it's like all these modern conveniences that we think are like, oh my God, can't live without like they're making us sick and sad.

Jackie, do you know what you need?

I could see you doing this, even though it's like a little unsanitary.

So it's the only reason I'm going to be doing compost?

No.

That's disgusting.

I could see you like getting chickens and like having your own eggs.

I would love, there's nothing better than farm fresh eggs.

But like, do you think your HOA would be okay with that?

No.

Right.

No, I don't.

But I would love to not have chickens because I'm kind of scared of animals except for brew and do and

I like there there is a serious difference between a just hatched egg and a store-bought egg.

Yes.

So when we go to Brian's house, Brian kind of homesteads.

Like he has chickens and all the eggs in his entire place are

from his farm obviously and he like gives them away to everyone because there's like so many chickens and so many and they're enormous they're like green they're not even like brown or white like they're a crazy gray eggs are not supposed to be white right and they're they're definitely different they're like natural yeah no it's just so tastier oh richer that reminds me and I just my my last question is like how are you supposed to homestead when you like have children cuz it's like I barely have time to make meatballs like how am I pickling my food storing it making my own jams and churning my own butter I think a better question is how are you supposed to homestead if if you have a job?

Like homesteading sounds like a full like if you committed your entire day not like you let's say you had oh like right now I'd be homesteading instead of podcasting.

Yeah like no podcasting like you wouldn't be able to raise children and homestead like it's impossible.

No, I think like people who raise children they they homestead and they're driven to it because they want to give their children really great things.

But I think also eventually the children help in the homesteading like they're with the chickens.

It's a family business.

They're there, you know, over the church and

the turner.

Yeah.

You just making their own candles

And then they sell them at local fairs and that's how you sustain because you you're spending all your time homesteading.

You need to make a living.

I assume that the husband is out working.

We should hope.

We would hope.

You did just remind me though about animals that I've started the process of looking for a new puppy

and for Shelly.

Of looking for Sheldon.

And the end of the year is hard because so many people get dogs for Christmas and I'm like late.

So it probably will take some time.

However, I did chat with someone who might have a litter coming up for me.

And she was sending me pictures of the lineage, you know, the mother and the father and, you know, background, health, genetics, things.

I'm very, I'm going to be much more specific this time around about what sort of health screenings need to be done.

And I took it as a side because they sent me a picture of the parents, said these parents were gorgeous, gorgeous cavaliers.

And the mother, her name was Jackie.

And I just think that's crazy.

Was she a homesteader?

She was gorgeous.

She was like a nine-time national showdog champion like she was a queen

she was actually like a huge queen in quebec

the queen of quebec yeah

okay i think it's a good sign i'm gonna say something really crazy that you're gonna shut me down for but i just you know there's no such thing as a bad idea that's not a go it's actually not a saying but um

it is today i love the idea of marketplace take it or leave it they say it oh my god

there is a pet store no oh my god

near

in our neighborhood where like the last time I walked by, it had the cutest blend.

I'm Cavalier.

Not saying that Cavalier is still there, but like maybe they have calves.

No.

Like I will be getting a dog from a breeder.

And I know like I like on the level of acceptable, acceptable ways, socially acceptable ways to get a dog, it goes adopt, breeder, pet store.

Like I would never go to a pet store.

And I know it's sad because like those dogs technically don't calves.

They have to lie already.

It's like someone should help them.

But

part of the reason why.

But then you're perpetuating the business of pet stores.

I understand.

But also like pet stores are notorious for selling, you know, sick, inbred dogs.

And that's something I just experienced.

And that's why I'm like being really particular about the breeder that I go to.

And that I understand.

And what sort of like genetic testing and background and health screenings that they do.

So it's so not an option for me, even though, like, of course, it breaks my heart to walk past a pet store.

I'm a human.

Especially if there's like a cute Blenham.

I know.

I know.

Okay.

And by the way, I know that pet stores are bad.

Please don't send me videos.

Like, I'm, I'm aware.

Like, adopt, don't shop.

Do strong, okay?

Adopt, don't shop.

Please, like, don't put that on me today.

I'm not in the mood to sift through my DMs with like sad videos.

Guys, mama's get her.

Mostly because, like, I know.

And you should adopt and don't shop.

And that was only like an idea for Claudia.

That wasn't for everyone.

Okay.

Well, I'm not doing that.

You should adopt and don't shop.

So back to Luke Holmes.

It should really be adopt, don't shop.

Or adopt, don't shop.

The slogan needs some work.

The T is just errant.

Adopt, don't shopped.

Yeah, that's better.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story?

It's someone's birthday today.

It is.

Taylor Swift is all smiles as she brings in her 34th birthday with Miles Teller and his wife Kelly Sperry as they leave a restaurant in the wee hours.

So Taylore went out last night to ring in her birthday.

They went to Parcel, Kenneth Parcell restaurant.

Oh no, and they went to Rach Parcell.

Rach Parcell greater than Kenneth Parcell.

Oh, it's tough, but yeah.

Rach has to go to Parcell.

Yeah.

I didn't even, by the way, I like to pride myself on being, you know, someone in the know.

Yeah,

you've got to go to Parcel.

I've never heard of this place.

But it's like, maybe it's Parcelli.

That does sound right.

Parcelli.

It's P-A-R-C-E-L-L-E.

That's Parcel.

But that extra E.

Parcelle.

Parcel.

Parcel.

So they went to Parcel last night, and Selena was there at 1.2.

They left at 12.22 a.m., officially ringing in Miss Taylor's birthday at Parcelli's.

And looks like a great time was had by all.

Squad.

Trav wasn't there.

Trav was not there, But the rumor mill is that Travis is planning her a birthday party in New York City.

No expense spared.

Nothing is too good for his girl.

And that should be happening tonight.

Or maybe this weekend.

Well, what's Travis's schedule this week?

Chiefs' schedule.

Okay, as a football player, like, can you just do whatever you want during the week between games?

Like, no, you'd like to practice.

No, okay, so his next game is December 17th at 1 o'clock p.m.

I think that's Saturday.

Yeah, that's on Sunday.

That's on Sunday.

Where is it?

At the Patriots, New England.

Oh, so he...

No, I don't think they get to the town.

I don't think they get to the town till like Friday.

And they have to all stay in the same hotel Saturday night.

Okay, either the party is tonight, like with enough days.

before the game or it's Sunday night after the game.

But wouldn't he have to be in Kansas City for practice?

That's what I'm saying.

Maybe they,

yeah.

Well, maybe he's like jetting in, jetting out.

I don't know.

This was also a topic of discussion because when they had their bye week and he went to Argentina, like some talking heads were upset that like that's how he was like, you know, jettisoning and go around the world and he should be like with the team, like head down.

But I don't know, if you're like doing well and you're winning games, then do whatever the fuck you want is my policy.

Well, at that point, he was doing well in winning games, so he can do whatever the fuck he wants.

But in the last two weeks,

Like this week, it might be a hard week for him to just like go and celebrate his girl's birthday.

I know, like, he might have a hard time getting the TO because

they need him.

And they need to practice as a team.

Right.

But whatever, they'll make it work.

I just do have a lot of questions about like the schedule.

And I feel like we have so many waged listeners.

Drop a comment.

Like, what are you allowed to do during the week?

When you have a game?

Like, if you're traveling, when do you leave?

Do you have practice?

How many days do you get a day off?

I think also when they played the Jets, he stayed at her apartment.

But that was like kind of not kosher also.

It's not.

Like I know for a fact that you have to stay, even when you have a home game, you have to stay in a hotel with your brother's teammates the night before a game.

Yeah.

But he chose his girl.

No, and him like throwing her no expense spared party.

Like it's just, it's like a, it's a movie.

It's a book.

I feel like no one's ever thrown her a party before.

I know.

It's like she has everything in the world, but like no one's ever thrown her a birthday party.

Like she's probably, she's always thrown for herself.

You know, when you see those photo booth pics, and it must be nice to have someone just throw you a party.

Yeah, and somebody like with money, you know?

With means, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, not like, I think a lot of celebrities like have people throw them parties, but they end up paying for the party.

But it's like, oh, my friends threw this for me.

They planned it, but I paid for it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, not that.

No, like somebody fully picking up the bill.

And that's just why this relationship is so different for Taylore

on every level.

Yeah.

Where do you think the party's going to be?

I have to like literally sneak it.

Zero Bond.

Yeah, I think so, too.

I'm on my way.

I'm on my way.

That's my favorite quote.

Do you know who it's from?

I've never even seen this show.

I saw a clip of it once.

Super nanny.

Remember that British lady who would like go to the homes of like troubled kids and whip their asses into shape?

And so every episode starts, she's like in the back of this old school British town car and she's like reading the file and she's like, I'm on my way.

Is that the one with the kid who's like, She's the queen and we're the sorry people?

Yes.

Classic stuff.

Yes.

I guess we don't even realize the level of influence Super Nanny has on us.

Like all this time.

We never even put that together.

I didn't even know that was the name of the show.

It was an amazing show.

And kids have been acting out ever since.

Yeah, it's not a coincidence.

No, the nanny's been really quiet.

And the nanny's been really quiet.

That's how she became the nanny.

Are you ready for our next story?

Number three?

Number three.

Yeah.

Don't get it tasted.

You're good.

You're good.

A little more like semi-relationship news question mark because Glenn Powell and Sidney Sweeney are out promoting their movie and, you know.

doing the most together.

So Gwen Powell jokes that Sidney Sweeney is the only person who's seen all of his body after this anyone scene from their new movie, Anyone But but you where he um had a nude scene I guess he like took his pants off too quick on a cliff but these two are like joking around their press tour together like yeah like it's I feel like at first

I believed it

and now like they're playing into it too much and a lot of people I forget where I saw this I feel like maybe it was not skinny but not that's Instagram Cindy Sweeney's fiance is the producer of this movie.

Like, it's this clearly what's going on is for press.

And I need people to be like a little bit more smart here, okay?

Like, use critical thinking.

So, she's still with her.

No, and this pisses me off, actually, okay.

People on the internet are so dumb.

Like, Taylor Swift is in a full-blown relationship.

This is PR.

But, Sidney Sweeney and Glenn Pablo, like, who are so clearly both not in a relationship, but like, are promoting a movie together about like two people who have chemistry?

Like, it's so clearly PR.

Everyone's like, I'm obsessed.

I stand.

But, like, when other people have relationships that are so clearly like real, everyone's like, oh, this is PR.

Chris Jenner works hard, but the devil works harder.

Shut up.

Like, people are so stupid.

Yeah.

That's about it.

That's that on that.

Like, these two are not dating.

They are not.

Don't date.

I feel like they gave it a shot.

Like, if there was any chemistry between them, they would be dating.

But now we can rule out that there isn't because, like, it would be more convenient for everyone if they just dated.

The thing is, like, I don't think so.

Like, for real.

Like, I think they're both, like, hardcore professional actors.

Like, they did a movie together.

Like, so yes, they both happen to be good looking.

Like, she's in a relationship.

He was for a very long time.

Like, I don't know, just because they're both good looking and like in a movie where they kiss.

Like, I don't know.

I just don't think.

I don't think they'd be a good couple.

You don't?

No.

I happen to know Glenn Powell.

I think they would be a good couple.

Like, if they were both on the list, we would put them together.

So I'm glad, like, I'm glad that I can, I'm glad that I can, like, live knowing that, like, they're not suited for one another, because if they were, they would have fallen in love on the set of this movie.

I don't think you heard me.

We just kind of skipped over something I said.

That you know Gwen Powell.

I do know Glenn Powell.

I just felt like I wanted to say that.

Do you have any follow-up questions about me knowing Glenn Powell?

No, because I believe we've been over this.

Oh, have we?

Glenn and I are actually really good friends.

I'm sure.

I'm sure.

But no, like Glenn Powell is one of our favorite young actors.

And she's a favorite young actress.

Yeah.

Therefore,

like the thing is, I just like, I'm smarter than this, you know?

At least you're not dating.

Well, I mean, I don't know.

No, she's so me with Taylor and Travis, like screaming at everyone.

Oh, my God.

Totally.

Oh, my God.

Don't listen to me.

What do I know?

We'll check back in when the movie's done, you know?

Yeah.

I'm not giving this my heart and soul yet.

But they're also like not really, they're not saying that they're dating.

They're just like wanting you to think it.

Yeah.

Which is always, it's like, you know, low-hanging fruit of movie PR.

Sure.

Right, right, right.

But when it works, like when it's real, oh my God, there's nothing better.

There's nothing

actually

more effective in terms of marketing than two people who are actually in love.

And don't get us started on this whole high school musical Twilight conversation, but you guys know what we're talking about.

I'll just give you one more reference just to like bring the point home: Mr.

and Mrs.

Smith.

Yeah,

It's.

That's kind of the blueprint.

Yeah.

And this is not that.

No, this is not that.

And the movie looks.

It looks cute.

It looks like a smut novel come to life.

Yeah.

It's just very like unserious and random.

Yeah.

It better be good.

Yeah.

Is it, I think it's in theaters.

It feels like a streamy vibe.

Yeah, I think Maestro is a streamy vibe.

I just saw the premiere was last night and it said Netflix on the step and repeat.

Really?

I thought that was like a theater Oscar, but it's Steven Spielberg.

A movie that felt like a real movie.

Yeah, it's been distributed by Netflix.

And it's Steven Spielberg.

Martin Scorsese.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm looking at it.

Director Bradley Cooper.

Producers Bradley Cooper and Martin Scorsese.

Steven Spielberg is not a part of this?

Not in any way that would be in the marquee here.

I mean, the way that Steven Spielberg and Martin Scorsese are two separate people is something that just feels illogical to me.

No, to me, I can keep them apart because Martin Scorsese is Shutter Island.

He's very, but he's also very distinct looking, Martin Scorsese, like with the big eyebrows, the glasses.

He's like short.

I'm glad that

I think Shutter Island was like my first Scorsese foray because he'll always just be like, crazy Scorsese.

Oh, that's so funny.

And to me, Steven Spielberg is like,

you know, epic dramas, comma, like weird gamer movies.

What movie are you referring to?

That one that came out recently.

Gamer?

Yeah, it's like gamey.

Let me just pull up the IMDb.

Oh, E-T.

That's not what I was talking about.

Oh, that's Spielberg.

Yes, that's Spielberg.

Oh, like he does like Indiana.

Oh, he, executive producer.

That's not the same as producer.

No, I think.

Ready Player One is.

Yeah, Ready Player One.

That's the one I'm talking about.

The thing is, I'm not a film buff, in case you couldn't tell.

Yeah.

My favorite director, probably Judd Appetow.

You know?

Yeah, mine's probably Kenny Orteka.

Oh,

definitely.

Also, in Keenan's book, he talked a lot about Judd Appetow because like one of Keenan, Keenan's like big break was D3 or D2 mighty ducks or whatever.

Right.

But I was waiting for him to talk about heavyweights, which he did.

And it was actually really interesting because he, um,

like he was pretty, you know, overweight for most of his career, but he was like, it was such a value add for me.

And I realized like how lucky I was.

Like nobody ever once in my career, I never went to a meeting and a director was like, you need to lose weight.

Like it was just, I got roles because I was fat, like heavyweights.

And it didn't really dawn on him till he got a little bit older that like he should feel like

any sort of shame or like he just he was very like body positive in a way that's not what he said but he was like yeah yeah and he got roles because of it and it made him stand out but it also made him look so young which is why he was turned down for SNL so many times because they just thought of him as like a child actor but he was on all that when he was 21 like he wasn't a child wow yeah um but he talks a lot about Judd Appetow and how that movie like changed his life but that movie could never be made today heavyweights yeah no heavyweights is such a good movie it is

lunch has been canceled due to lack of hustle.

Speaking of, what are you having for lunch?

I don't know.

I got to eat something really like protein-based to get me all jacked up for my ski lesson.

Or you need carbs for the energy.

Oh, yeah.

Do I have to carbo?

Like, what do you do before?

I don't know.

Like, what do you do before?

Just have a normal, a turdy warm bowl.

Should cut it.

Carbs, protein.

That's why we love a warm bowl.

It's got it all.

Are you ready for our next story?

If it's our next story that's brought to you by State Farm.

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You know, I have just like a couple of nuts for breakfast.

Jackie has a couple of breakfast tacos from the place next door.

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Great.

Thank you.

You got a well, Dan.

Our next story is a very long saga that we have not discussed on the toast, but I'm sure that you've seen.

Okay.

Like all this stuff with Matt Rife.

Oh, you know what?

I was going to send you this story.

I know it all.

Do you want to say that?

I know a lot of it because some of my friends are big Matt Reif fans and they were explaining the drama to me.

I had never heard of him.

He's this comedian.

He had been, he's been like having a rough couple of weeks.

So it's actually really interesting, like the come, the coming up of Matt Rife.

So Matt Reif was just like a comic who did stand-up in, you know, clubs and stuff.

And he started, he just really used social media to his advantage.

And he started posting a lot of his crowd work

on social media.

So he would have funny interactions with people who would be like, you suck, or like people who just shout like hecklers.

Crowd work is like a very niche thing on TikTok that people love.

And he blew up.

So much so to the point where he got a $25 million deal with Live Nation to produce his tour.

He's on this big arena tour.

He got a Netflix special.

And he's pretty much like new on the scene.

And his success and his fans and his fame comes from TikTok.

And it's all women because he's, you know, a young, handsome man.

He's very handsome, especially like for a comedian.

So, right.

Excuse me.

You're handsome too.

Thank you.

So he has this really like powerful internet fan base of women, which, you know, can be a scary thing if it goes the wrong way.

So first what happened is that he released his Netflix special.

It was kind of this unprecedented thing.

You know, people work for years and don't get Netflix specials and he got this Netflix special and he had become known for his crowd work.

And you really can only do crowd work in small

clubs, you know?

You can't do crowd work in a theater and you really don't do crowd work in a Netflix special.

Netflix special is just more traditional stand-up.

So he got a lot of, you know, response feedback from his Netflix special.

One about a particular joke he had made about domestic violence.

He basically was saying that, you know, there was a woman who, a waitress of his, she had a black eye and, you know, maybe she wouldn't have a black eye if she got back in the kitchen.

It was like kind of a crazy joke, especially when your audience like is women.

Like that's who made you famous.

It's not like you're doing like bro comedy.

Like the people who come to your show are the girlies.

The girlies come to your show, millennial women.

So it was kind of like a crazy joke.

And there was a lot of immediate backlash once the Netflix special came out.

And he responded to it.

He posted on his Instagram being like, I know a lot of people are upset about the joke that I made.

So like swipe up for my, you know, response.

And his, he swiped up to an Amazon link of like a helmet like for kids.

Like like get like life's tough, get a helmet?

Kind of.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

But I do think it was also like helmets for, you know, the helmets that babies wear when they have like a, their head is a little misshapen?

Yeah.

A lot of, yeah.

Like a lot of babies wear them.

So it was like, I don't, I didn't really understand it, honestly.

So it was like, hell, but I think the general gist.

So it was like reshape your head.

Yeah.

And the general gist was life is tough, get a helmet.

Like, it's a joke.

Get Get over it.

And so there's just kind of been this like discourse now on TikTok because TikTok invented Matt, right?

And what TikTok giveth, TikTok also taketh away.

So then people were just dragging him saying, you know, his special isn't even funny.

He's really just like a crowd work comedian.

He doesn't write good jokes.

So another clip from his special went viral talking about girls who are obsessed.

It was just like the whole special was like attacking women.

Well, yeah, that's what I heard from my friends who like really like loved him.

And they went to see his show and the whole audience is women.

And it felt like he doesn't want that sort of audience.

Like he wants a male audience.

So he's like offending the people who actually come to his show while trying to woo in people who don't like him, know him, or care about him.

And it's like, well, now you got no one.

So he was just pissing everyone off.

And then the comedy special that like, you know, more people could see than the people who went to his show just became clear that like he is not interested in his existing audience.

He doesn't really care about like cultivating that fan base and he wants like.

a cooler, broier audience.

So those are the jokes that he's making.

Which is so dumb because everybody knows like if you want to be successful, like having female, like women, having women with disposable income being your target demo is like the best.

Like women are more likely to buy, more likely to share, more likely to attend.

Like it's just dumb.

But yes, it's very clear.

Like he showed up and was like, I want to be more,

like, who's a comic I can't even compare that has like broy audience?

Andrew Schultz.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

And he wanted to like push the envelope and be a little daring.

So another clip of his special goes viral and he's talking about girls who are obsessed with like Saturn and

astrology.

This is the quote.

He said, just because Jupiter has, he said, he bashes women who use astrology as an explainer for their quote, poor decision-making skills.

He said, just because Jupiter has a ring and you don't doesn't mean blah, blah, blah.

So I actually like the joke about

just like using astrology to be an asshole.

Like that's actually, that's a funny joke.

But people were very quick to point out, you know, Jupiter actually doesn't have a ring.

It's Saturn, whatever.

So this other TikTok creator.

Right, so that is the story of today.

There's a TikTok.

So the story of today is he's found himself in like another drama, but this time with a child.

With a six-year-old, because a TikTok star named Bunny Hidaya posted a video of her son responding to this clip.

So I've seen Buddy's content before, and I know that she has a son who's kind of like a savant.

He's very, very smart.

Like young Kelvin?

Yes, and he's obsessed with...

astrology, the stars, so he knows everything about the planets.

So he had made a little stitch video responding to the Jupiter has rings with the actual facts of the space-time container.

Right.

He said, actually, it's Saturn that has rings and it has more also.

And you're mean to girls was what he said.

So then Rife, Matt Reif, clapped back in the comments, writing, Jupiter also has a ring and Santa Claus isn't real.

He continued saying, your mom buys you presents with the money she makes on OnlyFans.

Good luck.

After seeing the messages to her son, then the bunny Hidaya shared a TikTok video in which she says, while you clearly took a lighthearted video and turned it into fighting with a six-year-old, let's talk about the comments you said about me.

I have never made a single dollar from a man.

You can't accept the fact that people may like women for their personalities, though we know you don't have one.

You stick to circle jerking the men that you need validation from, and I will gladly take your female audience that you so desperately want to get rid of.

Yeah.

Okay, so I'm not generally a fan of like putting your kid in content to like go viral.

So like that part of it like did give me like a little bit of an ick, but it was really harmless.

Like he, I happened to know just like from seeing her on my free page, like her kid is very smart.

So she was just, it was, it was really, it was, it was tongue in cheek.

It was harmless.

I don't think she thought Matt Reif would respond.

And she certainly didn't think he would respond in such a fucking evil way.

Yeah.

And I just was like, what is going on with Matt Rif?

Like he's imploding.

Yeah, he's imploding.

And he's been given like an opportunity that literally nobody gets like to blow up in the way that you blow it up and have like this old school traditional comedy

support from, you know, Live Nation, Netflix, like it's so unbelievable.

It would never happen to a woman.

Like it's really, it's unprecedented.

And for him to just kind of be like taking a big dump on it, it feels, and I'm not even like, so I'm not offended by the jokes.

Like they, they weren't super funny, but like, would I make a joke about domestic violence?

Like, no, I wouldn't.

But, you know, I believe in the right to make jokes about stuff that are whatever, but I just don't know why.

I don't think it was like a good, you know, business move for him when his audience are women.

And probably a lot of them who have been, had brushes with domestic violence.

So it just felt like a bold, weird choice.

And you're right.

It's like he really wanted to come out of this whole thing as like, bad boy, Dave Chappelle.

Like, I don't give a fuck, bro.

Like, jokes for life.

Like, yeah, but also, I think if you want to make

borderline, you know, offensive jokes, talk about sensitive subject matter, like, they have to be really funny.

Yes.

They have to be undeniably funny.

Yes.

And this

doesn't sound like it was that.

That's actually the perfect way of putting it.

So yeah, I don't know, you know, in the same breath that I heard about, I had not heard of him as I am not on TikTok.

It's just, you know,

that was quick.

Easy come, easy go, I guess.

Yeah, but the thing is, is that he got that $25 million Live Nation deal.

And the way that those deals work is that you have to tour with Live Nation until you make them back the $25 million.

And so things like this happening where women are not going to want to come to your shows anymore, like he might be working for Live Nation for the rest of his life.

Interesting.

Or maybe all of this

controversy drums up more interest in his show.

I hadn't heard of him.

That's true.

Not that I'm now going to buy a ticket, but

they do say all press is good press.

Yeah.

I just think it was such an aggressive clap back to a kid.

And it really was a harmless video.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's like, just save your energy, like clap back at someone else.

Yeah, like someone your own size.

Yeah.

It was weird.

It's very strange behavior.

And you kind of putting it as like him rejecting the audience that got him to, that's exactly what it is.

He wants like dudes.

Yeah.

To come to his shows.

Who cares?

Yeah, a ticket is a ticket.

A ticket is a ticket.

And like, if you actually looked into like the business of social media, you would know that like if you have an audience of women and the same exact size, like let's say you have an audience of 100 women and 100 men, you're more likely to be successful touring, selling books, whatever.

Women are just like more passionate.

They're, you know, they buy more.

They share more.

They bring, you know, men just

watch this thing and move on.

And like burp.

And yeah.

Yeah.

It's such a weird coincidence.

Yeah, it's a weird thing.

But I mean, maybe that's

maybe it's like if he had spent years building up his audience and he knew how hard it is to like, you know, outside of the TikTok algorithm, like every fan, like how hard it is to acquire every single fan, like he wouldn't be so capricious about

saying like bye to them.

That's true.

Easy come, easy go.

You're right.

That's a very good point as well.

It's the capriciousness, really, for me.

At the end of the day, it comes down to the capriciousness, cap.

No cap.

No cap.

Cap.

Bussing.

Cap on the no cap.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

A little mama news because Hillary Duff is pregnant with her fourth child, her third with her husband, Matthew Coma.

This was a shock to me.

I didn't realize like Hillary Duff has such a brood.

Oh, yeah.

I'm quite impressed.

The Lizzie McGuire alum and Matthew Coma are expecting their third child together, her fourth.

She announced her pregnancy on Tuesday by sharing her family's holiday card on Instagram saying, so much for silent nights while cradling her baby bump.

So cute.

So cute.

I love this queen.

Like, I love.

Hillary Duff, like, really is kind of a woman who does it all.

Like, she has four kids.

She's been working since she was 10 and she stays relevant.

She stays like on good projects.

Like, she's always just doing good shit.

Even though her last show got canceled, like, people loved it.

Yeah, she stays working.

She stays humble.

Yeah.

She's seen that.

And have you ever seen that video of her like attacking a photographer for like not leaving her kids alone?

She's like a protective mama bear.

She's a mama bear.

Yeah, she's at like a soccer game and they just don't leave her alone.

And she just goes up to them and it's like, you guys are freaks.

Get away.

I could see her saying that.

Yeah.

She was like, you've been following us around all day.

Like I'm literally at a soccer game.

Fuck off.

Queen.

Queen.

Yeah.

No, I'm really happy for her.

And what's the joke we have about Matthew Coma?

So it's a verb.

He's a verb when you get Matthew Coma.

And I guess that's like when someone, your collaborator, like takes all the credit for the work.

Yeah, Matthew.

You know, you're the man behind the scenes.

No, not a scandal.

It was just like a public beef with Zed.

He was like Zed's producer for so long.

And I think a big part of Zed's success and the work that they did together, but Zed got all the credit and he was kind of like comed out of it.

That's how I remember.

He got

comed.

Sad.

I think.

I mean.

Or at least he has a full home life.

Yeah.

Correct me in the comments if I missed a piece of that.

Or maybe he's not.

Yeah, no, that sounds right.

Was he villainous?

I don't remember.

No, he got like cut out.

You're right.

Yeah.

So those are the fast five stories.

Today is usually the day where we do deer toasters.

We've decided to push that to tomorrow's show because today is a nice long juicy episode.

We'll let you enjoy.

And I have to go skiing and Jackie has a lot of things.

So

we will do deer toasters tomorrow.

And that's our show.

Anything you want to say to the peeps before we let them go?

No, enjoy the show.

We have two more shows till holiday break.

Yeah.

Just counting down.

Tomorrow's our second to last show, so you might as, you should enjoy these.

Savor them.

Savor.

Maybe listen to them on half speed.

Thinking that.

Double the length.

You'll have a two-hour episode today because we're at an hour now.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Okay.

Well, you just finished the episode, so maybe for tomorrow.

Yeah, yeah.

We didn't get, we should have given that advice at the top of the show.

Thank you guys so much for listening to The Toast, the Millennial Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, bitch, and give this video a thumbs up.

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about how beautiful, stunning, and wickedly talented we are.

Hope you guys have an amazing hump day.

We will see you tomorrow.

Bye.

Love ya.

Bye.