Dumb Moms: Tuesday, November 14th, 2023

Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the Chosen Happy Tuesday, or as I like to call it, Tuesday, because I'm making choices today.

And one of those choices is to spend the morning with my favorite girl as well on the planet.

It's Jackie.

Let's see how long I could talk before I let her say a word today.

It's my turn.

Hey, turdy.

I love that you feel you have a choice,

but you don't have a choice but to spend every morning with me.

Jackie, there's this little thing called free will.

And if I wanted to, like, isn't it crazy?

Both you, you and me both, we both have the power to just like fuck this shit up and be like, listen, I'm done with the toast.

The thing is, it's funny that we're having this conversation today because we literally don't, like, I'm sick as a dog and I have no power to say like, I'm done with the toast today.

I know, but I think it's a good thing.

The show must go on.

Like, whenever I'm like crossing the street, I'm always like, it's amazing that like the car at the red light has free will and isn't just going to run me over.

Like

the way that we've all just decided, most of us, to be civilized, it's really amazing.

Like I always think, I'm like, I'm three inches from a car.

What is stopping this guy from just killing me?

It's this unwritten social contract that we've all signed.

So like, yes.

To be decent to one another, you know, some of the time.

Not

most, not all, as we've seen.

Not on World Kindness Day, that's for sure.

Certainly not.

But like, yeah, you could just quit.

Okay, if I quit, like if you quit, I would continue on and I'd probably do it with Ben.

Okay.

Who would you, if I quit, who would you do it with?

Olivia Margot.

Which one?

I'd see who wants the job.

Which one?

Whoever wants the job, or maybe I'd make them audition.

Maybe I'd put it to a vote.

Like, oh, get really excited.

Testing them.

AB testing Q scores.

Screen testing.

Screen testing the girls.

Okay, that's a good answer.

Okay, thanks.

You're welcome.

Are you going somewhere?

No, no, no.

Seems like you've given this a lot of thought.

No, no, I am giving a lot of thought always to just the concept of free will.

Do we have it?

Sound off in the comments.

I think that we do.

What do you think?

I think technically we do.

Untechnically.

But human nature plays a part.

Yeah, I mean,

we still have a code of behavior and a code of ethics that we all want to abide by, but it's our free will to engage in those.

Like, yeah, when I'm driving, like, I could just run the red light and kill some people, but like, I don't want to pay the price of that.

And I also don't feel like killing people, you know?

Right.

So that's my human nature stepping in to kind of trump my free will.

Yeah.

Cool.

Yeah.

Cool.

It's just, that's what I was thinking about this morning when I was crossing the street.

Maybe you didn't think that because you work from home um so you didn't like pass any cars on your way to work today yeah and I just know fans don't think about such dumb shit sometimes okay free will is not dumb shit bitch

like it's maybe it's because I just read the measure Yeah, I actually think we had this conversation.

I was trying to think if we've had it on the toast or on the redheads when we read the measure and we were talking about free will and all of us kind of chimed in on like what our thoughts are about free will.

So I don't know if that was here or there but my thought is that like I think we all have free will we can make whatever decision that we want but like God knows what decisions we're gonna make well yes that's true but then you think about there are people who literally do plow their cars into crowds of people and maybe those people like took the concept of free will like too crazy

yeah

Because that's really, I can't, I can't

explanation.

I don't think that's what it is.

That like free will switch just flipped.

I think that there's a different code that they live by.

Or they're mentally ill.

Yeah.

Yeah, okay.

So maybe everything's not about free will is what you're saying.

Yeah, there's just more that goes into it.

Yeah.

Okay.

So it's.

But this is a raging debate that philosophers and theologians have been having for centuries.

So, you know, you and I kind of jumping in on a random Tuesday.

Like, no, I think our experience and our thoughts are balanced.

No, I'm saying, but, you know, we're just part of a larger conversation.

Okay.

And then it, you know, then it makes me think of another larger conversation, nature versus nurture.

Where do you land on that, Jack?

Ooh, a bit of both.

Because, and to me, like, that's always been my thinking.

But then watching Three Identical Strangers proved that for me.

Like, to me, that settled the debate.

It's a bit of nature and a bit of nurture.

You really can't talk about nature versus nurture without bringing up three identical strangers.

If you haven't seen the documentary, like you absolutely must.

And the way, like, I just stumbled upon that documentary on a Delta flight once.

And then I, like, was texting everyone I know and like Googling it.

They're like, yeah, we all saw it two years ago.

That's so me.

And then made it my personality and then found a personal connection to the documentary.

If you guys weren't a part of that era on the toast, that was so crazy.

We're like, literally, three identical strangers is our Roman Empire.

Yes.

It's our Roman Empire.

Like, I was fully convinced that Ben's mom was like a part of this

like study that was done because she was adopted.

It was

the same adoption agency.

Like, I never got any proof, but like, I I was just, I made it about myself.

Yeah, no, you did have a very clear connection.

I had a strong case.

It wasn't a stretch by any means, considering how you could have stretched to make it about you.

You really didn't have to.

It was right there.

I've done, you know, bigger back flips to make it about myself.

100%.

That was a crazy time.

If you haven't watched Three Identical Strangers, I would actually, that's one of the things I would say: turn off the toast and go watch it.

Don't wait till the episode is over.

Like, go watch it now.

And then, you know, call your local congressmans and write your representatives to get those papers unsealed at Yale University.

Not enough people talk about, like, as long as we're all talking about what's going on at college campuses right now.

Let's talk about how Yale has sealed medical documents about this incredibly fucked up

study, experiment that was done on real people without them knowing.

And there are people walking around now who don't even know they were a part of the study because it all happened when they were actual newborns.

Yale University has all that information and could actually like reunite families and they won't unseal it.

Let's talk about that.

No, and it's like it won't be unsealed to like 2080 or something.

And all all the people who participated would be dead.

Also, they ran this medical experiment and in those records are the results.

So it's like, okay, you were tested.

You fucked up all these people's lives.

Fucked up these people's lives.

Like, what did you learn?

And there's so much anarchy going on on college campuses.

And I'm not really one to advocate for breaking the law, but like, why not steal the records?

Yeah.

I'm going to steal the Declaration of Independence.

We need Nicholas Cage up in this bitch.

Fucking steal the records, okay?

I'm with Jackie.

Hashtag steal the records.

Like, why are these records so protected?

Like, fucking steal them.

There's no sense of lawfulness on these cultures.

There's no sense of ethics, right or wrong.

Steal the records, okay?

Jackie, if only Jewish students were protected as swiftly and as fiercely as these documents were.

Well, you know that the documents are about medical experiments that were on Jewish children, so they really don't give a shit about letting them out.

No, but we're just like actively living in the cover-up.

Like we saw the documentary, everybody, it blew the thing wide open.

And then in 2080, when these things come out, we're going to be like, well, why wasn't in like 2020, people still advocating while they were alive to get the documents on sale.

So that's what I'm protecting my legacy by having this conversation.

Like, I did the right thing.

Yeah, no, same.

And I feel like it,

it, you know, it obviously moved through the news cycle.

It's not top of mind for anyone except for us.

And we need to bring it back into the fore.

I know there's a lot going on in the world, but this is important.

We need to make three identical strangers like trend again.

Somebody needs to post about it on TikTok.

You know how they like

TikTok, they'll post.

Yale Archival Center is over party.

Hashtag Yale is over party.

Yale's been over party.

Yale will always be over party.

So it's Tuesday.

We've got a show that, you know, I can't tell 100%, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be fabulous.

It already is.

It always is.

That's the thing.

But I feel like we have some things working against us today.

Like?

My sickness.

Oh, I thought you were going to say free will.

No, I wasn't.

You're worse?

I'm worse than I was yesterday.

Yes.

I'm hoping like this is rock bottom and I start to get better.

But between the sinephony, sneezes, and noseblowing, like I apologize in advance.

I know it's annoying, but imagine how I feel.

Imagine how I feel.

Put yourself in my shoes.

Imagine how tired we are of it.

Imagine how tired we are of it.

Right.

So I do apologize.

I

apologize for nasalness.

She's slurring.

She's sick.

She's sick, but wait.

You know what you might need?

A nice warm chili to, you know, ease the pain in your throat, warm yourself.

Senses.

Warm the cockles of your heart.

And very exciting.

Jackie and I have been talking a lot.

Not actually a lot.

We've mentioned a few times recently that we're doing like a whole merch rebrand, new company, new website, new everything.

And our first big collection is set to come out in a few weeks.

But a few days ago, Jackie had this like crazy idea for just a random merch drop.

And so last night we just put up on our new website, which is shop toastmerch.com,

a collection of very chili inspired items.

And it isn't like the big new drop we've been talking about.

We just like had this idea and we wanted to get it up for pre-order at shop toastmerch.com.

It's chili season merch because it is that time of year.

We needed to get it out.

We couldn't wait.

We couldn't wait.

I was making my chili and I was like, I need merch to signify this season of my life.

Like I want to wear this every Sunday while I'm whipping up a chili and having a chili day.

Right.

So check that out.

The pictures are on our Instagram, but you can just go to shop toastmerch.com to get a crew neck, a hoodie, or a hat.

You can get whatever size you want because it's available for pre-order.

So it's not going to like sell out.

You can place your order now.

It'll ship in about three weeks and you can get whatever you want.

But that's not our big merch collection that we've been teasing.

No, no, no, no, no.

So

just

don't get confused and get excited because what we've been teasing is really exciting.

And we will continue to tease it.

And we've always been teasing it and we always will be teasing it

if that ain't the truth so how are the stories today the stories are mediocre which i find is sometimes an added value because sometimes when we have like fire stories we get we have to talk about them you know what i mean like yesterday was very analytical yeah yesterday was very like you know here's what's going on in pop culture when the stories are a little less than we have to get creative yeah and that's when we do our best work so as I said, I think it will be a great show based on her track record if I was a betting woman.

But if history's any indicator.

But, you know, there's always a chance that it's not.

There's always a chance.

And you're right.

There are things working against us.

Yeah.

Like the nasalness

is not my best sound.

It's giving friend fine.

Oh, is it?

Yeah.

Okay, that makes it better.

I like she's very nasally.

That makes it better.

Have you ever seen the nanny?

Of course.

Oh, okay.

Naked Night, baby.

Yeah, but you never did like a rewatch, right?

No, no.

I definitely would recommend it.

I have so much on my content plate right now.

So I started Iron Flame last night.

I'm three pages in.

The new book.

The new fourth wing book.

Yeah, but I have lessons in chemistry, which I'm watching like with the people.

It's episode by episode.

I've heard The Buccaneers on Apple TV was

excellent.

I've heard it was made for me.

Yep.

And I did see a commercial for it, and I thought the same.

Then I have,

there was a series I was going to watch.

I need to start writing these things down.

I pretty much only have Gossip Girl.

I watched three episodes last night.

Me and Ben turned to each other in the middle and we were like, this is the greatest show ever made.

Like, to put it simply, it's like,

there's never been a show that's better.

Really?

I thought you were going to say the opposite.

Like, your time has come to an end.

No, no.

In the beginning, it definitely took a little like,

what is this?

Like, it was a little cringe.

And I like dragged it like last week.

We're at the beginning of season two now.

It's just simply incredible.

Great.

There's nothing better.

For real.

Now I know.

And then I discovered last night, because I forget what we were talking about.

We were just talking about shows like Gossip Girl.

And I brought up the OC and Ben's like, I've never seen it.

So that's what we'll be doing next.

Such a good rewatch.

I re-watched it recently.

Especially for Ben, because Ben is Sandy Cohen.

Oh my God.

Claudia, you need to start it like now.

I know.

I forget that there's an element of Judaism in the OC.

Like, you wouldn't think.

You wouldn't honestly, you need to move on from Gossip Girl and start the OC.

Ben's,

and he is Sandy Cohen.

Ben is Sandy Cohen.

I couldn't believe.

Oh, because we were talking about Laden Meester.

I'm like, do you know who he's she's married to now?

And he was like, yes, Adam Brody.

And Ben's like, what's he from?

I'm like, oh, he's Seth Cohen.

He's like, who's Seth Cohen?

I'm like, have you never seen the OC?

So that's how we got to that conversation.

Oh, my God.

So that's like an exciting thing thing coming up.

That is exciting.

Wow.

Yeah.

So it's just kind of been a lot about that recently in my life.

I understand.

That's good.

It's a good place to be.

How are the boys?

Are they sick?

Did they get you sick?

Yeah, Harry was the culprit on this one, but I seem to be like sicker than he was because it passed for him already.

So let me ask you a question because I know a part of being a mom is like just getting sick because your kid gets sick at school.

Everybody's carrying around a bunch of, you know, germs.

Does it hit different when when you get sick from your kid?

It's like, it's like better.

Like anything happening.

We're so sympatico.

We're sick together.

But to be honest, most of the sicknesses he's had, like I'm already immune to as an adult.

Like he gets sick because he's littler and getting everything for the first time.

So it's been a while since he gave me something.

And this is just a common cold.

Like it's really nothing crazy.

It's just like so inconvenient.

There's nothing to take for it.

And I can't even take a typical like cold and sinus medication because I'm breastfeeding and it will dry you out because that's what it's meant to do, like dry out your sinuses.

It dries up your supply.

Okay, but I would just imagine that like any Harry comes over and he gives me, you know, like a leaf.

It's the most beautiful, amazing leaf I've ever received in my life.

So I imagine Harry comes over and gives me the common cold.

Like, does it feel different?

You can be honest.

No, it feels the same, but it's nice to like be in it with, in the trenches with him.

Yeah.

Mommy understands.

Yeah.

Mommy's what you're going through.

Yeah.

And then I know like what might be bothering him, a little tickle in the throat.

Let's have an icy.

Let's have a pedialite icy.

That makes sense.

You know?

So I get to like experience it.

If he can't tell me his symptoms, I know.

You know.

Mommy knows.

Mommy knows best.

Mommy knows everything.

And it's good if I get it because then I get the antibodies of whatever it is and I pass them on to Charlie.

So it's a whole little ecosystem.

Let me ask you another question about motherhood because you know they say like mother knows best and as you get older you realize like, you know, everything you were told as a kid, like your parents weren't really always right about everything.

So are you coming into your, like, you're now the person?

I know.

I'm the authority.

You know who's everything.

Yeah.

How does that feel?

And where do you get your information?

That's a great question.

I mean, a lot of it, I think, is like passed down from like what your parents generations have done and like what they would do when you were sick and little like things.

But then I also see some stuff.

And then also we go to the doctor, we learn more.

I see some stuff on the internet.

Like, oh, here's a little remedy for tummy ache.

Yeah.

But what I'm saying is more like they always say like mommy knows best they don't say like daddy knows best no offense so like you're like what separates you from the pack of your family as the leader intuition mother that's true it it is real it is yes a hundred percent it's very real and that's just biological because i've seen and that's on that and that's on god literally Because I've seen you become that, you know, even in our own, even as it pertains to me, you know, like I just kind of defer to you like you've really just become that person it doesn't happen overnight it's like a slow transition yeah it doesn't happen overnight but it's just a wisdom acquired over time

that's beautiful coupled with mother's intuition like i just feel like when the day comes god willing i should be so lucky to be a mother like i'm not gonna be like a smart one like i'm still like like dumb do you know what i mean I know what you're saying.

Cause are there moms out there?

Serious question.

Who are dumb?

Yes.

Okay.

And I was just thinking that, like, not every mother at the outset has all this wisdom.

I think a lot of it is learning on the job.

Yeah.

You know, your kid gets sick once and then the next time you are more prepared.

Yeah.

So it's a wising up over time, but you're not dumb.

Like you're not a dumb woman.

No, like other women might be.

Jackie, like I am.

Like I'm really like not smart when it comes to like common sense.

Like I think I'm very business savvy.

I think I'm smart in, you know, different and unique ways.

But when it comes to like, I find myself like the answer to like obvious things are always like right in front of most people.

And they're like never in front of me.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

I mean, every once in a while I do something incredibly dumb.

Okay.

That makes me feel better.

And I'm like, oh, I'm so, I'm so dumb.

Like I think I'm smart and I'm just a dummy.

Okay.

That may, that's a universal experience.

Is that what you're saying?

Yeah.

Like I,

I'll do something and I'm like.

Like, I wish I could think of an example, but it's like, no, like,

like, the answer is so obvious and it didn't even cross my mind.

Yeah.

No, I wish I could, I feel like something is on the tip of my tongue of something I did recently that was like dumb common sense.

Oh, I mean, I guess like when you rolled your ankle, like you shouldn't have walked through the weeds of grass.

You should have just walked on the sidewalk.

Yeah, I was thinking that too.

But just like dumb stuff, even when it comes to like cooking, like sometimes I'll put my hand on something that's like obviously hot.

No, no that's so me coated like

totally like oh you know what I kind of I have like a I have a cooking hack for everyone okay I guess a lot of people do this but like we don't because we keep kosher but like at Costco and a million grocery stores they sell just like a rotisserie chicken that's already cooked so like you just heat it up and that's literally dinner yeah so I was on Instacart yesterday and I saw that Fairway had a kosher one Yeah, dinner.

I'm literally made dinner, Ben was shook.

I'm like, I made dinner.

Oh, so the cooking hack is to buy a rotisserie chicken yeah even though like i know everybody knows that but like we haven't really been able to participate in that no it's true we don't get to participate in it and then i think the next level of that is like when you use the rotisserie chicken from the store and like make a chicken pot pie so ben does that with um

chicken salad he's like a rotisserie so when i got oh this is insane i literally was so excited i like made dinner ben got home late he was podcasting he went on um Chicks in the Office and like they went on him.

So good guys.

Oh, chicks in the office collab coming out.

Was it both of the boys?

well so the chicks in the off the chicks are in la

i saw they were at dear media studios were they doing good guys yes but so like ben was like the loser on the remote end of it and he like honestly that it never works out i'm sorry it doesn't i don't think so either that's why so i didn't like the girlies and josh were like keykeying hard and ben was like loserville central in sitting in this chair right here um what was the point where was that going oh so he gets home and i like was so generous i got this rotisserie chicken bless you.

Let it out, girl.

Put it in the book.

I put my mic across the room.

Okay, hopefully that helps.

But you can hear me, right?

My rotisserie chicken story.

It's really interesting.

So Ben gets home and he's like, oh, rotisserie chicken.

So I'm like, yeah, I made some rice.

Ben was going to like make some veggies.

And I was like, that's dinner.

Like, so easy, you know?

And he's like, no, I think I'm going to shred this up and make chicken salad.

I'm like, excuse, like, I was.

personally offended.

I'm like, first of all, I bought this for us so we could like have dinner.

For you to then take the chicken that I bought that I spent on,

time re-sourcing, sourcing, and then take it away from me and tear it up for your nasty fucking chicken salad.

He couldn't understand why I was like so deeply offended by that.

Yeah, it's offensive because it was your idea.

It was your rotisserie chicken.

Yes.

And he's making something that you don't eat.

Like, thank you.

He could make a chicken pot pie with it and that would be better.

I wouldn't eat that.

Okay.

Chicken soup.

I'm not sick.

You understand what I'm saying?

Right?

Like.

Casserole.

No.

Okay, whatever the fuck you eat.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

If he had made something that was like turdy friendly, something that you've been dying for, like, that's a good use of the chicken.

But to just be so selfish and unkind on World Kindness Day.

On World Kindness Day, nonetheless.

I knew you would understand.

Yeah.

So did he use the whole chicken or like half of it, his portion?

I literally said, sit down.

We're having rotisserie chicken for dinner.

And that's what we have.

And you said, you'll eat it.

You'll eat it and you'll like it.

That's exactly what I said.

Well, maybe I am a mother.

Maybe like, I feel like as you're entering your homemaking era, this is preparing you because now you have dinner on the table.

Okay, sure, you have to do it seven nights a week every day for the rest of your life.

Maybe that's why God made men so dumb and incapable to prepare.

This is obviously a heteronormative way of thinking.

So pardon my

exclusivity.

But maybe God made men so fucking stupid and incapable so that by the time we get married, you're married for maybe a year, two years, three years, in my case, seven, before you have children.

So you're prepared for that sort of immaturity and toddler-esque like behavior.

It's true, but some men, well, first of all, your husband.

I refused to believe it.

That some men are smart.

No, that some men are like capable who do.

I don't mean like smart as in like wisdom.

I mean like, you know, chores, meals, cleanup, household things.

And thank God for that.

Like your husband is an actual chef.

Okay, yes.

And while that's lovely to have like a, you know, a cocovan for dinner,

what about the like the dishes?

Ben made literally, okay, Ben last night made just like roasted onions and carrots.

We just had like some stuff.

So we had a veggie, not onions, like carrots, potatoes, whatever.

Four dishes.

Like four pots and pans.

He needs an OPD, a one-time pan dish.

But like to Ben, if he's not making enough dishes, like it's not enough of a meal.

Do you know what I mean?

I just don't feel like he's really cooking.

Yeah.

I understand that.

Also a theory I have.

What I was also thinking, it's like when Zach and I, like right now, I'm like such a homemaker.

Like I try and cook something every single day.

I had fresh muffins in my house.

Like I'm just.

You're in that era.

I'm that woman.

But when Zach and I were dating, like if he was looking for a homemaking wife, like it would not have been me.

Like I remember one time I was like, I'm going to cook dinner for him at my apartment, like do something special, whatever.

Olivia made the whole meal.

And the thing that like I was in charge of, I think it was like just chopping a salad, like took me forever to chop.

And it's like, if you had,

you really don't know what you're going to get when you, when you are with someone young.

And then, I mean, look at how I've blossomed, but like, it's true.

You would have never expected this from me.

I'm so glad you brought up a salad because like the absolute one time I ever cooked for Ben while we were dating, he was like, we were together and he randomly like wanted a salad.

I was like, okay.

I was like, let me make it.

And like, to this day, he still talks about the salad.

So I cut up lettuce.

It's so good.

No.

I cut up.

I don't really, like, I don't eat salad.

So like, I don't really know what goes in a salad, you know?

I know lettuce have your preference.

And it depends what you have in the fridge.

So I put salad in, lettuce.

I cut up carrots, but like they were baby carrots.

So they were just these kind of like really weird circles.

Yes.

That's hard to eat, amongst other things.

Then I put hearts of palm in it,

which Ben doesn't like.

Okay, he's wrong for that.

And then like, I know Ben loves dressing and he loves sauce.

Like, I just put Russian on top.

That's pretty.

And to this day, like, he still talks about the salad.

Like, I can see the salad in my head, like, the round little carrots.

It was not my finest moment.

The thing about salads is that they're typically like, you have to go with a vibe.

Like, you have to select your salad and then that will dictate choose your players.

Choose your players.

So, if you wanted to do obviously a Caesar salad, you should have done that because it's just like lettuce cheese and croutons.

You can buy all those things.

Yeah.

Or if you want to do like a Greek salad, that tells you what that ingredients.

Feta, onion, olive, cucumber.

Yeah.

Yum.

I do a bit of mix and match, but when you're making your salad for yourself, you can do whatever the hell you want.

It basically sounds like what you're saying is salad is personal.

Salad is personal.

So I feel like we've dilly-dallied long enough, and perhaps.

Perhaps it's time for the fast five stories that you need to know.

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We're not 14 anymore, you know?

Under your makeup, every day you're going out, you need to be wearing an SPF.

Not me like yelling at everyone when I don't even like, I'm not even good with my SPF.

What's the word I'm looking looking for consistency but the l'oreal spf 50 daily uv lotion is a stick it makes it so easy it doesn't leave a white cast that's why for so long i was like i'm not putting this on it's making me look pale you can visibly reduce the appearance of dark spots and resist sun induced signs of aging with this product the daily uv lotion 100 of dark spots are intensified by are intensified by the sun and 96 of women agree that this product does not leave a white cast so discover the new bright reveal dark spot duo visit target online and in store to buy yours today that's target the bright reveal dark spot duo from l'oreal Paris.

Today's episode is also brought to you by AG1.

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Ben will be mad at me if I don't give him credit for like putting me on the AG1 train.

Olivia Oshray too, but really Ben has brought us into our home.

Oh, and sit.

We're an AG1 family.

Yeah.

Today's episode is also brought to you by Thrive Market.

We always love a Black Friday deal, but what we really love is a Black Friday deal on groceries.

Did you see that meme?

It's like, this Black Friday, put the eggs on sale.

Like, that's what people need.

Just everything to be normal priced

for their everyday.

I don't need a flat screen TV.

I have.

Right.

We were saying we need grocery Black Friday.

And Thrive Market was like, hi, we do that.

Black Friday, Thrive Market was like, wait, hold my eggs.

We're excited that Thrive Market is having a Black Friday and Cyber Monday sale.

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Thank you, La.

You're welcome, Pha.

Our first story is some big divorce news.

The Big D.

The Big D.

Chris Appleton files for divorce from Lucas Gage after six months of marriage.

According to LA divorce documents obtained by people, Chris cited irreconcilable differences on Monday with the date of separation as November 10th.

The documents also show that a post-nuptial agreement is in place.

Chris Appleton, who is a hairstylist to the stars, namely Kim Kardashian, married Lucas Gage in a Las Vegas ceremony on April 22nd, with Kim officiating.

The episode just aired on the Kardashians.

I honestly, I feel like he was contractually obligated to stay married until that episode aired.

Like the timing is crazy.

The timing is crazy.

I don't know about a contract, but it would have been really weird to watch an episode of people getting married who are already divorced.

So I just felt like for their reputation, like let's just wait a few days until the episode airs.

Yeah,

I honestly feel like this was the weirdest saga.

I don't think this shocks.

Anyone the only somewhat surprising thing about this is the timing.

Like the shortness or because of the episode?

Because of the episode.

No, the shortness.

We knew.

I think we were all just like waiting for the day that we heard.

Like they literally dated for a, I think maybe a month.

Like it was crazy.

And then they went to Vegas and got married.

Like it was so cliche almost.

I know, but sometimes when that happens, I'm like, it's love at first sight.

You hear people's like grandparents that this happens all the time.

Jackie, we're not living in those types of times.

They dated for six weeks and now we've been together 60 years.

No, that's sweet, but shit like that doesn't happen anymore.

I like I want to believe in a world where it does.

So when I saw they were so serious so fast and then they take it to to getting married.

For me, that makes me believe.

I believe.

I believe in a thing called love.

I believe in a thing called love.

That's sweet.

I didn't.

Especially because they got married.

Like, if they didn't get married and they just got hot and heavy really fast, you know, like Pete and Ariana style, fine.

You know, burn bright, fizzle out, fine.

But to get married, I'm like, give me 60 years.

I just think about all the people whose wedding songs are Shania Twain

and who would have done anything to have Shania Twain perform at their wedding, you know?

Yes, that is true.

And it just seems unfair, honestly, because that song, Still the One, is literally a classic.

It's up there with like, you know, Ed Sheeran.

It's up there with, oh, what a wonderful world.

Oh, the way you look tonight.

Like,

it was Jackson Britney's wedding song.

I was at their wedding, you know?

I'm sure they would have loved to have Shania perform it for them.

Yeah, you know what it makes me think of, even though it wasn't a Shania Twain song.

Okay.

That Love is Blind couple that was obsessed with that Leanne Rhimes song.

I hope you dance.

Bliss and Zach.

Bliss and Zach.

Honestly, Love is Blind really should have gotten her.

At least they got the rights to the song.

It's not Leanne Rhimes.

It's Leanne Womack.

Okay, close enough.

It's true.

At least they got the rights to the song.

You know, they're like cheap about licensing.

Yeah, but the song was such a big part of the season.

And like the memes.

They splurged, so they weren't going to splurge for Leanne herself.

I don't know.

I think Leigh Ann Womack these days days wouldn't be crazy pricey.

Yeah, and Bliss and Zach are still together.

They are.

So are Chelsea and Kwame.

So that's why it's like shocking that Chris and Lucas couldn't make it.

Like other couples have

gone the distance.

So are Amber and Barnett.

That doesn't surprise me.

No.

But now it doesn't.

Chelsea.

I think Kwame and Bliss and Zach, their road to marriage was so rocky and their seasons were so awkward.

It's surprising.

But Amber and and Barnett, like

love.

They were strong.

Yeah, they were strong for love.

Just like Lauren and Cameron.

No, I'm actually more shocked, probably the most shocked by Chelsea and Kwame than I am over anyone else.

Even though like Bliss and Zach were so untraditional and so like fast in the boat and the other girl, like, what was her name?

Irina, like, I get it.

But to me, Chelsea and Kwame were more shocking because just based on the footage, it so appeared like they didn't like each other.

No, that he didn't like each other.

And that's just, he didn't, yeah.

And that's just like the basis of, you know, know, a marriage is likeness.

But the fact that they're still together is proof in the pudding.

No, it makes me really question what we see on the show.

Yes, yes.

Like that was bad.

Them being together is bad for the editors because it's like, hey, we're a bunch of fucking liars.

Yeah.

Or maybe some people are just not good at showing affection, especially with cameras in your face.

And maybe that's what Kwame's dealing with.

I don't know.

The way it made it seem was like he would have chosen Micah.

That scene in the pool.

That scene in the pool.

It's so crazy how these people get so famous and recognizable for 30 seconds like when you just said Mike, I'm like wait who is that?

Yeah,

it's really just a flash in the pad.

Yeah

Zach is obsessed with Love is Blind.

He's recently been he watched like the most recent season and that's

by himself, but I would like look over his shoulder a little bit.

Like you know what?

Olivia and Shapiro are also obsessed with it too.

It's kind of like elder millennial.

That's like who watches Love is Blind.

Then he went back and went.

By the way, checkie is love is blind choogie yeah yeah then he went back and watched every season that he hadn't seen already and oh he has to watch the first season he needed even more and he started watching the ultimatum oh my god is he okay he's obsessed he's like just in this era of dating shows don't tell him about the bachelor no you got him you're to blame because he obviously just loved love island Yeah, but I don't know why he started watching that season of Love is Blind.

I'm sure that like he heard it.

Oh, we watched the last season together.

That was like in the spring.

I remember that was like Sir Claude Era and we we watched like the live finale together.

So yeah, I got him into it and then he like couldn't get enough.

That's so funny.

And also that's great news because our list of things to watch for our holiday trip this year as a family is the Golden Bachelor.

So he'll be on there.

He'll love it.

Yeah.

And those shows are so funny when you watch them with like a big group.

Yeah.

And I've heard the Golden Bachelor is really good.

Me too.

I'm really trying not to spoil it.

I haven't.

I have only seen that Jerry said he found his match.

Gary.

Gary.

And I just feel like it's not right.

That it should be Jerry.

Like, it's just, I'm sure it's a family name and it's beautiful, but like, if you're going to go on TV, like, your name's got to be Jerry.

I just feel like once we start watching, we'll get used to Gary.

Yeah.

And we'll be like, oh, I can't believe you ever called him Jerry.

But

until we get there, it's like

Jerry.

By the way, have any of the Golden Bachelor contestants had old tweets?

Or are they like beyond that?

I don't know.

I haven't seen anything.

At this point, like there isn't a reality show that pops off without one contestant having like old tweets.

Yeah, something.

Old liked photos.

Right, right.

So like, did anybody dox the Golden Bachelor queens yet?

I don't know, but don't give them any ideas, Claude.

Sorry.

I was just curious.

Are you ready for our next story?

Because it's some more divorce news.

Oh, my God.

Different.

No one's getting divorced today.

Okay.

Lisa Hoxteen is launching an amicable divorce company amid her brutal spit from Lenny.

So Lisa Hoxteen is ready to help others who are headed for divorce.

She is launching a service called Splitwell, which is a service to help estranged couples end their marriages amicably and, quote, without breaking the bank.

A Bravo fan account posted about the Reality Star's new endeavor, which Lisa then reposted to her stories and said, turning my pain into purpose.

The website isn't fully functional yet, but Inquiring Minds can add their names to the waitlist for more information.

It also notes that it's powered by AI.

Question mark.

Okay, I mean, this is like a nice idea.

I have to imagine if this was possible, like somebody would have done it before.

This isn't like a unique idea.

Like, I feel like it's dating like a tech mogul.

Like, maybe they're about to...

That's true.

Maybe they're about to

solve divorce.

It's giving Christine Quinn.

Also, it's like, what if it's an app where two people are getting divorced?

They type into the thing.

It's powered by AI.

So you type in like what you want in the divorce.

The other person types into.

And AI comes up with something that maybe you both could live with.

So it's basically like a digital mediator.

Because that's a part.

That's a part of divorce proceedings, sitting down with a mediator.

We don't know what this is.

I'm just guessing.

Yeah.

I love, you know, turning your pain into purpose.

I think that's beautiful.

I love that there is, you know, a tech mogul behind this.

Well,

that's hopeful.

Just a guess.

It doesn't say that anymore.

We didn't get much except for a screenshot.

It says, divorce made dignified.

Join us or sign in.

And it says coming soon, breaking up without breaking the bank, powered by AI.

Join the wedding.

And I do not agree that this is giving Christine Quinn, like towards the end of Selling Sunset, when she was just becoming like digital realtor girl with her tech mogul Silicon Valley husband.

Yeah.

And they were doing like Bitcoin purchased homes.

Also, that's another really underrated thing.

Christine Quinn is married.

Yeah.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

For a long time now.

She just like came back one season with a boyfriend and then got engaged, got married on TV, and like they're literally married.

Yeah, their wedding was unbelievable.

Yeah, like that was so random.

And she has a child.

Yeah.

And a business.

Yeah, I haven't heard much about her app, but I'm not big in the what's it called?

Not Bitcoin.

Crypto coin.

Cryptocurrency.

Cryptocurrency.

So I wouldn't know.

Bitcoin is a cryptocurrency.

Yes.

Yes, it is.

Like, I think the most popular one.

But I look forward to hearing what this is.

I like my idea for it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because, like, maybe that, maybe, like, imagine if AI could solve divorce.

Like, you put in the things that you absolutely have to have.

You put in the things that you want, things you could live without, and they generate a solution.

As a society, where did we land on AI?

Because I remember like the conversations, bad, bad, bad, but then maybe good.

Like, where do we land?

So here's where we're landing, I think.

Because I saw a commercial, by the way, way for a company and they were like saying and we're powered by ai like as if it was like we're carbon neutral like a good thing yeah so here's where we're gonna land ai is an amazing technical advancement it's gonna make a lot of things more automated and easy even in my daily life i've started using ai for some things and it's fucking hysterical yeah um but it's gonna be the end of us

It will be the end of civilization as we know it if we can't rein her in.

But here's my question.

Can AI be funny?

I guess it's how you define funny.

Like genuinely.

Genuinely funny.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

Because I forget what I was thinking I might use AI for, but I was like, could AI be really funny?

Okay.

I'm going to ask AI to tell me a joke.

Which AI do you use?

Do you have Chi PT?

Yeah.

I'm going to blow my nose.

Log in?

Oh, my God.

Yeah, Yeah, just make an account, Claude.

It's the future.

I think I did.

That's the thing.

Oh, look, my iPad has something saved.

So log in.

Let's use a strong password, whatever.

Continue.

So I'm just going to be like, AI.

Oh, God, I have to verify my email.

This is such a torturous window.

It'll be worth it for the really funny joke AI is going to write us.

Oh, yeah.

This better be good.

Where's.

Oh, here.

Open your email.

Verify.

Email verified.

Okay.

Oh, tell us about you.

Leave me alone.

Like, to me, I'm still so surprised when AI isn't just like, ask Jeeves.

Literally.

I mean, they want my phone number too.

What nerve?

I mean, this is what I mean.

It's going to be the end of us.

Now I need a code.

Oh, my God.

I'm definitely like selling my soul to the devil.

100%.

Don't forget your fingerprint.

By the way, we will.

We're literally watching the demise of Turdy right now.

Turdy is selling her soul for a joke.

Just get me to the chat.

Okay.

Okay, let's go.

Tell me a joke.

And then maybe we could ask us to tell a joke about something specific.

Why don't scientists trust atoms?

I don't know.

Because they make up everything.

Oh, that's not bad.

Okay, say, tell me a joke about...

What do you like to hear a joke about?

Taylor Swift.

Ooh.

Why did Taylor Swift bring a ladder to the bar?

Because she heard drinks were on the house.

See, that's just taking a joke and putting Taylor Swift's name in it.

True, true.

Okay, so let's say, tell me a joke about.

I had one.

Or say, write me a stand-up comedy special.

Write me a, I like that,

a stand-up, write me stand-up comedy.

About some, about being a woman.

About being a woman.

Love that.

AI needs direction.

They're not mind-readers yet.

Sure, let's give it a shot.

You know, being a woman is like being a part of a secret society.

We have this unspoken code.

Like, if I see another woman struggling with her outfit in a public restroom, it's an immediate call to action.

We become fashion superheroes, offering spare bobby pins, sharing emergency deodorant, and delivering pep talks.

Like, girl, you rock that jumpsuit.

But let's

talk about the magical world of handbags.

This is like so insulting to women.

Seriously, my purse is like Mary Poppins' bag.

It contains everything I could possibly need in any given situation.

Knead a tissue, lipstick, band-aid?

I've got you covered.

It's like a survival kit disguised as a fashion accessory.

This is really bad.

It's bad, but like, and ladies, can we talk about the multitasking skills?

We can all hold a conversation, send a text, and plot world domination all while getting ready for a night out.

Okay, but this is giving Netflix.

It's giving Netflix female-driven comedy.

Okay.

That's crazy.

Give

me an episode of the toast.

Podcast.

Yeah.

But that is crazy.

Like someone could get on stage and do that.

Like I wouldn't laugh, but.

Oh my God.

Wait.

What?

I think they think we're talking about toast.

Oh.

Yeah, literally.

It's velvety.

It's smooth.

Avocado, poached egg.

Okay, good.

That means they can't do our job yet.

Love that.

We'll have to keep checking every few weeks.

Who is Claudia Ashre?

Who is Turdy Lou?

As my last knowledge, updated in January 2022, Claudia Ashre is a social media personality, comedian, and author known for her online presence under the moniker, Girl With No Job.

Wait, she gained popularity from her humorous posts and memes on Instagram and other platforms.

Firms.

Claudia, along with her sister Jackie, Olivia, and Margo, has been involved in creating content and building a brand around their unique personalities.

Please note that information about individuals can change, and there might have been developments in Claudia Ashray's career and personal life since my last update.

Have there been?

I recommend.

Is Claudia Ashray married?

Well, that's an easy Google search.

You're low-balling AI.

She was married to Ben Soffer, who is known on social media as a boy with no job.

They got engaged in 2017, and their wedding took place in September 2019.

That's not right.

No, that's not right.

Okay.

I'm impressed.

Yeah, no, that was interesting.

Interesting exercise.

I'm glad I sold my soul for that.

Our next story, speaking of the future, speaking of technology and speaking of the future.

Without technology.

Lauren Sanchez is looking to the future in a new Vogue spread.

So Lauren Sanchez, fiancé of Jeff Bezos, is getting the Vogue treatment.

She did a sit-down interview with Vogue, a shoot with Annie Leibovitz, and a couple were one

photo that I saw with Jeff and Jeff's bicep.

Yeah.

I had just started reading the interview a little bit, but it's every time I read something about her or engage with her content, it just is always so striking, like how normal she is.

Like, she's saying, you know, she was, she blacked out when he proposed.

Like, we all did, you know?

Yeah, yeah.

I was shook to see these two.

They're

a very unique level of celebrity where he is, you know, a very famous business person.

He's kind of a part of this very exclusive category of billionaires.

But he's kind of bigger than probably any billionaire, not even in terms of money, but in terms of like cultural impact, you know, Amazon.

And then she's just this kind of

nobody at first.

And they were like, you know, Martin scandal.

And now they're coming out on the other side, like so normal and very famous with, you know, the the Kardashians and the Markles.

Like it's so weird.

Yeah.

And now they're just like doing the circuit.

I guess, you know, when you're engaged to Jeff Bezos, you can do whatever you want.

Cause if they didn't put her in vogue, like he would buy the magazine.

Right.

And I like, you know, using your power for thirst.

I do.

Oh, don't get me.

Like, if I was Lauren Sanchez, I would be doing the exact same thing, hanging out with Harry and Megan, hanging out with the Kardashians, being on Vogue.

Like, she's so relatable, it's disgusting.

Like, oh, I'm marrying the most powerful man in the world.

There's nothing I can't get.

I want to be on the cover of Vogue.

Yeah, so she was taking pictures all around their like Blue Origin compound in Texas.

She's in a helicopter.

She is a former helicopter pilot.

Wow.

Yeah.

She was a newscaster, then a helicopter pilot.

Wow.

And now a philanthropist, lady of leisure, Mrs.

Jeff Bezos.

Literally, I want my tombstone to read, she was a philanthropist, comma, lady of leisure.

Mrs.

Bentonsoffer.

Mrs.

Bezos.

Watch out, Lauren.

Some of the pictures are really stunning.

Some of them are like not my absolute favorite in terms of artistic direction, but it's a very great shoot.

I follow her on Instagram now because of the conversation.

Like, there's not a lot there, but we had a conversation about her.

I followed her while we were sitting in these chairs because I was like, I wonder what she's about.

And like, there's a lot of like, you know, clean water, philanthropy, but that's how I saw about the shoot.

And she's so hyped about it i'm so happy for her you do this is this is a girl who would i'm sorry never be in vogue

as a newscaster slash helicopter reporter um so this is just exciting to see someone get in vogue who you know if circumstances had been different wouldn't be in vogue so i'm i'm very happy for her yeah i hope she does the podcast

Yes.

And talks about life with Jeff.

I feel like she's literally going to do a reality show next.

Like, that's what I'm saying.

It's, it's just giving like accessibility.

You know, it's giving like, I'm going to do what I want because I can.

Yeah.

And you would think like some people in her position, their position, like, you know, are extremely private, not into like the fame and just take themselves so seriously.

And they're like, no, we're going to have fun with this life that we have.

And we're going to have an engagement party on a yacht and Leo's going to be there and all these celebrities.

And like,

and that's what we were just saying about Taylor.

Like, if you make it to this level of success and you're not not enjoying yourself, what are you doing?

And what's Mackenzie up to?

She remarried, I think divorced.

Oh,

yeah.

We just gave away all her money.

Couldn't be me.

Mackenzie Bezos would be

also confuse her with Melinda Gates.

No, they're so different to me.

They divorced most,

okay.

Yeah, she married someone else for two years, but it's and gave all her money away, right?

Well, she does the giving pledge.

so now she's you know broken alone no

no the giving pledge like you're still fine that was like so crazy how she got 36 million billion dollars right that's how much it was she has an estimated net worth of 27 million so

that was just ugh like i'm not really a jealous person

no i totally am but i don't think

I think that might be the most jealous I've ever been of someone.

Like she did it right.

She married a nerd.

She made a nice life with him.

That's why you go for the nerds, you guys, because they'll give you $27 million at some point.

Yeah.

I don't know.

It doesn't always work out like that.

Like, don't, you know, she's not.

Sometimes nerds, sometimes nerds become successful and, like, they think they're too good for, like, the girl who loved them when they were a nerd.

Do you not think that's what happened here?

No.

I don't, actually.

Why?

Because they were together for a really, really long time after his success.

It wasn't like he got successful.

You know who I do feel like that about?

And I know you love him.

Elon?

No.

Oh.

I can't even begin to get into Elon's personal love life.

I don't even know what's going on.

It's so confusing.

I feel that way about Robert Herjavek.

I feel like he was always very wealthy, but then he got like famous.

Shark Tank, Dancing with the Stars, and he ran away with his Dancing with the Stars.

Like, I feel bad for the girl who married Robert, you know, OG Robert.

But do you not feel like the proof is in the pudding with Robert and Kim?

I'm not denying their love or their, but I think, you know, we need to talk about, you know, the women who made these men who they are and then got left behind.

Yeah, but as long as they are like appropriately

compensated for their time and their vision.

That's like, let's talk about the girl Elon first married and had five kids with.

Yeah.

We don't even know her name.

And I'm sure she's well taken care of.

Elon is notorious for taking care of all the mothers of all of his children.

You know, there's a lot of speculation that Amber Heard's child is Elon's and that, you know, he paid for all of her lawyers during that.

So they're all well taken care of.

I just think we need to talk about some of the forgotten women.

Yeah, Justine Musk, 2000 to 2008.

Right, five kids, eight years.

But he started PayPal, which was when?

I don't know, early 2000s.

Okay.

Then Tallula Riley, 2010 to 2012.

And then Tallulah Riley again, 2013 to 2016.

That's so Elon.

That's literally what's happening right now with him and Grimes.

They're like on and off.

But see, like,

and this is where Elon and Jeff Bezos differ.

And I think why you and I really

are like into Lauren and Jeff is Jeff is very stable.

Like Elon's like such a genius.

They're both geniuses because they both started companies that changed the world.

Elon is that sort of like crazy genius.

And Jeff gives very, you know, stable homebody energy.

Yeah, because he's found the right girl.

I feel like maybe Elon hasn't.

Maybe.

And that's what he needs.

You?

The right girl.

Smitch.

Lauren Sanchez is in vogue.

Happy for her.

Never thought I'd see the day.

When I was reading those text messages, I want to get a little drunk.

If you'd have told me, honestly, I would have believed it.

You would have?

I wouldn't have.

I thought those text messages were going to end them.

Those were, but that's the thing.

We were just saying that.

Like when something is happening in real time, when it comes to like a scandal, you think it's just like the biggest deal in the world.

And it's really, it's never that big of a deal.

It's just a blip.

Yeah, and if you're going through something right now, I feel like that could be like a good message.

Not, you don't have to be a celebrity, like you're always thinking when you're going through something, like, this is the biggest deal in the world.

And then years later, you're like, oh, yeah, that thing that happened.

That small thing.

Right.

And you're actually grateful some of the time.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh, am I getting you sick through the computer?

Did you kiss me through the phone?

I'm giving you a virus.

Ooh.

Sexy.

You need

Norton's antivirus.

I tell you, computer.

Are we about to do the fourth story?

We're about to do the fourth story, so please expel yourself.

The fourth story that's brought to you by Zip Recruiter, perhaps?

Yes.

There are so many people in your life that you are grateful for.

And if you run a business, the people that you work with, I'm sure you're so grateful for them because it really is a team that makes the dream work.

I believe that's the phrase.

Teamwork makes the dream work.

And for us, it takes a team of people to make the show successful, just like it takes a solid team to make any business successful.

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I'd be super grateful if you go to the exclusive link of ziprecruiter.com/slash toast to try ZipRecruiter for free.

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ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire.

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Our next story.

Anne Hathaway says she was warned that her career would fall off a cliff at the age of 35, which a lot of women face.

So Anne Hathaway is 41 years old, which means she has long defied.

Wow, she looks great.

Yeah, she has long defied the warning she often heard as a teen actor that her career would not flourish past a certain age in Hollywood.

She said, when I started out as a child, I was warned that my career would fall off a cliff at the age of 35, which is something I know a lot of women face the thing that has evolved during that time is that more women are having careers deeper into their life which i think is fantastic obviously it doesn't mean we should have a ticker tape parade someone said this to me the other day there's so much to be proud of and there's so much to fix she said okay go off and go it's such a sweet feeling to know that you're kind of woven into someone's life through her acting roles Right.

Like, that's why it never made sense that like there were no older role roles for older women in Hollywood because it's like, well, someone has to play the mom and the grandma.

It's true.

And it's like, they would have like a 35-year-old being someone's mom.

It's like, come on, nobody looks like that.

Yeah, grow up, literally.

Literally, grow up.

Like, isn't acting supposed to be accurate?

Yeah, but I guess like the point is, you know, you play the mom or the grandma, and you're, you know, you're 35.

Relegated to that.

Yeah.

And it's like, that's not the star.

You're just the mom or the grandma.

Yeah.

No, I guess that hasn't changed.

Like, there are roles for older women, but like Bond is 60.

Has there been a franchise made off of a 60-year-old woman?

Yeah.

It's insane.

True.

Go off, queen.

What would the 60-year-old woman franchise be?

I guess they were trying to do that with like Book Club and Brady for 80.

80 for Brady.

Yeah.

I didn't see Book Club, but I did see 80 for Brady, and I lived to tell the tale.

I did feel like a little bit compelled, like maybe two months ago to watch Book Club.

It was like a Friday night.

We were like going to rent a movie.

I keep going to Apple to rent Oppenheimer.

And every time I do, it's not out yet.

It's always available for pre-order.

So then, like on the list, Book Club is always on there.

So I'm like, oh, Oppenheimer?

No.

Book Club?

Maybe.

I've never felt compelled enough to actually purchase.

But maybe you're part of the problem about it.

Like you're hesitant to see is like why movies like that don't do as well and they don't keep making them.

Because like you said, okay, let me ask a question.

Fair, fair, but let me ask a fair question.

Anybody who saw Book Club, is it good?

Like I didn't hear it was amazing.

I like the concept.

Like four, and I love books.

I love my book club.

Four girlies who who are older, you know, they start a book club and it changes.

Like I love the concept, but was it good?

Because 80 for Brady wasn't.

I feel like Book Club was good because they made two of them.

Right.

So that's always a good sign.

So I guess Book Club is the bond for girls.

Or like Nancy Myers.

Yes.

Okay.

That's better.

Nancy Myers needs to start a franchise.

Yeah.

Like a bond-like thing where it's just kind of the same.

Bonds aren't even special.

Like there's danger.

He gets a mission he almost dies he fucks a girl he lives to tell the tale nancy myers needs to do like it's complicated like a female protagonist falling in love in a beautiful home she's very wealthy like the the structure never changes it's just a new city or a new girl you know i mean that's kind of what she does Yeah, but it's not a franchise.

It's just different movies.

I don't know why I'm yelling.

I need to calm down.

You're passionate about the ageism in Hollywood.

Ageism

coupled with sexism.

Yeah.

There's no ageism for men in Hollywood.

I mean, like George Clooney's never been richer, more successful, or more famous.

Same with Brad Pick.

Yeah.

Well, it's also not just Hollywood.

It's kind of just society in general.

Like as men age, they're more dignified.

Right.

No, let's talk about that.

Let's talk about how like young girls, not young girls, but like girls in their 30s and 40s and even 20s like find certain men in their 60s extremely attractive and hot.

And I don't see many 20 and 30 year old boys dating 60 year old women.

I feel like it's happening more.

You do?

I don't know.

Like here here and there, younger men with older women, not

super

old.

Like, I don't think so.

It's just like a trope.

Like, we find older men hot and we find older women like old.

Yeah.

Do you think it's like maternal?

Do you think it also has to do with financial success?

Maybe.

Do you think young girls find old men hot?

Old man hot?

Who's not, who doesn't have money?

I'd like to take money out of old man.

I'm really

like as women, you know,

continue to age and like the generation of women who were like boss, bitch, successful get older, like they might find favor with young men because they have money.

No, I really, I want to take money out of it because I'm really talking about like attraction.

I'm talking about how like we see like just now, Patrick Dempsey with man's, like we all look at him, we're like, oh my God, he's hot.

Like we would fuck him.

Like that's the, that's sort of the narrative.

And with like people's most beautiful woman, whatever.

Let's say it's like, like, you know, a 60-year-old Julia Roberts, like, oh, she's beautiful.

You know, like, we talk about it differently.

Yeah.

I understand.

Not like, damn, let me get in there, Julia.

So, I agree with what you're saying.

And I understand.

I'm just trying to get more to the root of it, aside from obviously just plain old ageism and sexism, right?

Which exists.

But, like, Julia Roberts is rich.

Yeah.

You don't see people like thirsting in her comments.

Like, come to Brazil, Julia.

Yeah.

But like, they're saying, come to Brazil, Patrick.

They are.

They are.

Do you think he's going to go to Brazil?

I do.

Cool.

So just, I don't have any answers.

I'm just asking questions.

It's important to ask questions.

That's where we start.

It's a start.

It's a start.

To ask the right questions.

Yeah.

Are you ready for a fifth and final story?

Actually, a perfect story to sum up every conversation today.

Okay.

A biopic about an older woman is in the works and it will be AI-generated.

What old, just like a general older woman?

No, a specific older woman.

Oh, okay.

Why'd you say this?

Because I'm trying to get the themes.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

AI, a woman, older.

Okay.

Edith Piaff, AI-generated biopic, is in the works at Warner Music.

Wait, can I ask you a question?

Who's Edith Piaff?

No, Le'Veon Rose.

That song.

Oh, so she's a singer?

No, I know that song.

So that's like her legacy?

Amongst other things, but like that's probably her most.

So she was, is she American?

Is she French?

I think she's French.

She's a French singer.

And why do we care?

About

this story.

They're going to be using AI

to recreate her voice and image.

And it's a role for an older woman that they're literally giving to a robot.

Oh, my God.

It's a a voice for an older woman that they're literally giving to a robot.

Yeah, Warner Music Group announced it has partnered with Peoph's Estate for Edith, set to be a 90-minute film set in Paris and New York from the 1920s to the 60s.

You think the name Edith is going to make a comeback soon?

It's a pretty name.

I feel like it could.

It is.

I feel like it was like a World War II name, like young, there were so many young girls named Edith.

Yeah, like Downton.

Yes.

Yes.

But then we started to think of it as like an older lady name because all the young Ediths grew up into grandma.

Yeah, but you know what I also realized?

it's like a lot of people, especially for, I see this with Jews, it's like you name your children after people, grandparents or great-grandparents.

So you wind up recycling those old names that become young again.

Yes.

It's like Harry.

Yes.

So it's really quite cyclical.

Yeah.

Back to AI.

Back to Edith.

So there was a role.

There was a role.

The film will be narrated by

Erl Street.

The film will be narrated by an AI.

I never know how to pronounce this word and I don't know what it means.

Fascy smile.

You know the word?

What?

No?

F-A-Wait, spell it?

F-A-C.

Fasse smile.

I need to write it out.

Fascistime.

I need to write it out.

F-A-F-A-C-E-S.

No, no, no.

F-A-C-S-I-M-I-L-E.

Fascia smile?

Okay, wait.

Fascistimale.

I literally never heard this word.

It means an exact copy, especially of written or printed material.

Hold on, let me play.

And it's pronounced.

Shh.

Wait, shh.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

You learn something new every day here.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

Facsimile.

I feel like I'm like Diplo.

Literally.

Diplo ex Edith Pioff.

Ex-Facsimile.

I'm going to do the soundtrack for this movie.

Yeah.

let me closer let me go

um this is la violence

i feel like that's so classic like whenever like an instagram girly goes to france and she like takes a picture of the eiffel tower in her story she always

like walking from behind maybe like looking into a shop someone someone's filming her from behind and the eiffel tower is in front of her and she like looks back at the camera and like twirls her hair yeah and is it someone filming her or is it a tripod

the world may never know.

Okay, let me get to the deets.

By the way, I have to say, like, I'm all for making content out in the wild.

Like, I'm always filming myself

in the back of cabs.

Like, I don't give a fuck.

But it takes a different kind of beast to bring a tripod out in public because when you have no one to take pictures for you and you use a little clicker, like, it works great.

And I totally respect the hustle.

But, like, that's another level of confusion.

For sure.

But that's why, like, those girls who do that, they get the shot.

They get the brands.

They get

influenced.

And they're like, they're being successful.

They have what it takes.

I respect it.

I respect it, but it could never be me.

Agreed.

I could barely have my husband take a picture of me without me wanting to cringe into myself and be like, forget it.

No, it's fine.

Forget it.

Forget it.

Forget it.

I'm literally like, take a picture of me.

I go to take it.

And I'm like, no, stop.

It's fine.

I got it.

No, and then I grab the phone back and I see that.

I'm like, forget it.

No, it's like, I maybe got one before I cringed.

And it's obviously like not good.

And then it's like, I'm mad he didn't get a good picture of me, but it's like I couldn't unfurl myself.

This isn't going to work.

Here are the deets.

I feel like, no, I feel like that's just like enough, you know?

No.

I feel like it's like better if we actually don't get it.

I'm going to change this one sentence, okay?

Okay, okay.

The film will be narrated by an AI generated fashion smile of, what did we say it was?

Fact status.

Simile.

Of Peop's voice and promises to uncover aspects of her life that were previously unknown.

Classic.

Chilling.

Chilling.

All right.

Happy for Edith and the whole family.

Yeah, but sad for the older woman who's lost out on this role, who this would have been the role of a lifetime for.

Of a lifetime.

Edith.

So that's our show.

Yeah.

And as predicted, it was a great one.

The thing is,

we knew it.

Like, we knew it.

I know, but we had to show everyone because we have some doubters, non-believers who said, oh, Jackie's sick.

The story's stinked.

Like, how are they going to make something today?

And look what we did.

The doubters, non-believers are always coming for us.

Before we end today's episode, let me just remind you to call your representatives and tell them hashtag Yale is overparty.

And remind you that Toast Chili Merch is available at shop toastmerch.com.

We love you guys.

Thank you so much for listening to the Toast of Monday Morning Show, where we deliver the past five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

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Find us at Tulsa Cv5 Star View.

Paddy, beautiful setting, and wickedly talented we are.

Love ya.

Love ya.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Love you.

Bye.

Bye.