S5 Ep30: Redheaded Julia Roberts with Taylor Strecker: Wednesday, March 16th, 2022

Good.

Morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the morning toast.

Happy Wednesday.

It is hump day, and I'm so excited to be sitting down with a woman I like to hump on the daily.

Taylor Strecker.

Hi, Taylor Strecker.

Hey, girl, hey.

Hey, go ahead.

I'm so excited to be here.

You know, this is my favorite place to be.

It truly is.

Are you still feeling insecure about your hey, girl, hey?

We talked about that on your podcast.

I'm over it.

I love it.

It's the best.

And now, I have something I have to ask you.

What?

How would you feel if I changed it to hey girly girl?

Hey?

No.

First of all, girly girl is my thing.

I know it.

I fucking know it.

And second of all, like, don't mess with perfection.

Hey, girl, hey, like, is truly perfect.

Okay, thank you.

I will get off my job.

I'm confident in it.

Oh, my God.

I'm so jet lagged.

I know.

Okay, well, so.

First of all, Taylor is here.

She's one of my favorite co-hosts, hosts of the Taylor Trekker Show on Patreon.

She does a daily show also.

You're so funny.

You know what's so funny?

Every time you come here, you like have to be like a publicist for the Vanderpump Rules crew.

And

it's unfucking believable.

Your timing is impeccable.

I'm actually on the schedule for over a week.

Like, for real.

Yeah.

And now you're just coming here on the heels of major Vanderpump Rules news.

I know.

It's our top story today.

I know.

You just got back from LA hanging out with the VPR crew.

Yeah.

Look, before we get into Tom and Candy, how's the VPR galleys doing?

They're so good.

So, Stasi and Bo, that's like obviously who I'm staying with the whole time.

So, actually, I had a gift for you specifically from Bo.

So, Stasi is Bo?

Stasse is a daily listener of The Morning Toast now.

You know what?

I did know that.

And we're hoping to secure her for a guest co-host when she comes to promote her book.

She was talking like she was definitely going to come do it.

Oh, my God.

I cannot believe.

She was like, I'm nervous because now I'm like a fan.

Oh, my God.

The thing is, is that the Morning Toast, I don't know if you know this, but we recently found out that Kylie Jenner listens to The Morning Toast.

Shut the fuck up.

It's like 90% conspiracy.

Hi, Kylie.

No,

it's 10% conspiracy, 90% fact.

I think it's fact.

No, we like know, but like, we're not like 100% sure, but like we know.

Tell me how you know.

I'll tell you later.

Okay, fine.

Honestly, obviously, you don't listen to the toast because we've been talking about it all week.

I'm a little busy doing two hours.

I can't believe you do two hours a day.

I can't either, honestly.

Like, even in LA sauce, it's like, you work too hard.

Yeah, totally.

So who knows what the future holds.

But for now, two hours daily.

It's not video, it's audio, but you should check it out.

But she started listening to, she's like, you know, her books coming out.

She's like kind of like ready to get back into the world.

And so she said that her first foray was, we just, I was on her Patreon, she just talked about it, January 1st of 2022.

She told herself, I'm going to start listening to podcasts again that are like not just like true crime and history and shit like that.

And so she started with you guys.

Wow, that is so flattering.

And she's like a big fan.

And she's also listening to Tezo Taylor, which is not possible.

But it's a big thing to like listen to your friends and enjoy it.

I know.

So anyway, but so she was listening and she has just like on in the house And you guys are talking about the Rams before the Super Bowl.

Oh, yeah.

And so Bo sent me home with a Rams champion hat for you.

That's actually a hilarious,

which I fucking left on my kitchen table.

You're such a dope.

Like,

I mean, do we want to talk about our text exchange trying to confirm today?

You are the only one.

I was going to post it.

You should.

You're the only person on the planet who doesn't respond to a text message for hours.

Like, that's insane.

Claudia, I live in the moment.

No, you don't.

Every time time i'm with you

such a truth

no i'm only on my phone with you guys because you guys are all on your phone and i feel uncool okay don't it's like paris halton pro don't project your insecurities onto me bitch okay

no i am like

When my phone's down, my phone is down.

So you were in LA.

I know you were like batch recording podcasts.

Like back to back to back, doing all this stuff.

But like I was about to confirm you, you were the last one to confirm before I could post the schedule, get the toasters excited.

Well, I, when I saw the schedule go up immediately after, I understood the anger, the deep rage.

I was like,

Where are you?

Like, it's one thing not to answer for like 20 minutes, 30 minutes, but like four hours.

Can I read it?

Yeah, it's like, really?

I was gonna get really fucking embarrassed.

But then I was like, wait, I'm scared people.

I think she's being too big of a bitch.

No, you can post it.

Okay, so basically,

okay, okay.

Taylor, okay.

When are you back?

This is Friday at 3:24 p.m.

When are you back?

I'm scheduling it for Wednesday on the toast.

Does it work for you?

At 5.23 p.m.

Two hours later.

Two hours.

It's actually

one hour and 59 minutes later.

Two hours later.

Yes.

Taylor, in all caps, bitch, if you don't answer me.

And so my wife texted me.

Oh, I also texted your wife and I was like, tell your bitch ass wife to fucking check her phone.

So anyway, I got Tay's first and I was like, shit.

So I wrote, gah, I'm sorry.

And then called out.

When did you finally respond?

Huh?

What time did you finally respond?

Fucking two hours later.

Okay, okay.

And then she just goes, Wednesday question mark.

I said, yes, I'll be back Wednesday.

Exclamation point.

And then she wrote, great, in all caps, bye.

I guess if you don't know me, like, that does sound rude.

But, like, I am just like, I'm all business, you know?

I know.

I'm all businesswoman.

No, and I, and I respect your boss business vibe.

And you look like a boss business lady today.

You look stunning.

Thank you.

Where's this outfit from?

Let me guess.

Zara?

Okay, top is Zara.

Yeah.

Shoes are Zara.

Uh-huh.

Ring is my ex-husband.

And then the pants are fucking Fabletics.

Wow.

And I am

and I am here for, thank you.

You look great.

I like you and Neon.

Thank you so much.

I don't look as great as you.

So anyway, I forgot you're present.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

I suck at desk saying I'm sorry.

But Stasi and Bo say hi.

Oh my god, I cannot believe Stasi's like a morning like a routine listener like she has yelled me and Jackie a few times about things we spoke about on the shows and she was like but I didn't know that meant like homegirl was tuning in every day You just love to see like women lifting up other women.

Yes, right?

So they're great.

They're getting ready for the wedding.

I am so I announced

Fuck do I do it do it.

So it's coming out like in two weeks on taste of taylor Should I just say there is an announcement about the wedding?

Fuck you.

No.

I'm gonna give you I'm gonna give you firsthand Tom and Katie shit.

So I'm saving this for you.

Taste of Taylor, there's an announcement about Stosium Beau's wedding that we talk about on Taste of Taylor.

And do I know what it is?

Yeah, I think you do.

So should I blur it out?

Don't you fucking dare!

But I have to get a really great dress for it.

Yeah.

And so I'm like fucking panicking about it.

You're talking a lot about it.

I think people are going to be able to guess.

They can guess.

Okay.

But if they want to confum it.

Taste of Taylor.

Taste of Taylor.

So you're joining me today, co-hosting with The Toast.

We're going to dive into the Fast Five.

Obviously, I really want to pick your brain about Tom and Katie because I'm like left here like devastated with my heart and a million i'm really sad too um and it's also wednesday which is our dear toasters day where people write in for some advice and for some reason you randomly have co-hosted like five wednesdays in a row and i think you give really good advice just because you've lived like a really interesting life thank you and i think you've like made mistakes and built yourself up many times both personal and in business so i feel like you actually offer like wise wisdom.

I am incredibly wise, thank you, which is actually code for old, which I also am.

And no, but I just feel like I can really see the world from like everyone's perspective almost now.

Not everyone's, but like a lot.

Like even like my dad, I feel like I get his vibe for the first time in my life.

So yes, thank you.

I'm great at advice.

It's Beshare that I'm here.

It's Beshared.

I'm so excited that you're here.

Thank you for coming.

Thank you.

And I'm really excited to just like poke and prod you for questions.

So I think we should just dive in.

Let's do.

Here are the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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Okay, so let's dive into the fast vibe.

Obviously, the thing on everyone's mind, People Magazine, Vanderpump Rules, Tom Schwartz, and Katie Maloney split after 12 years together.

Although we may be on different paths, they say, we will continue to love and support one another's happiness.

Thank you for all the kind words.

So they both post, there was like a bunch of rumors floating around.

Yeah, like break that down.

So I have known about this for...

a couple weeks now and it has like been an ongoing thing.

Like I don't even think I was privy to like the length of time that this has been going down and but having having been married before and then like going through a divorce and separation i actually like i know how it goes down and it takes it does not happen overnight it takes forever and then it's a full you got it okay okay so there were rumors going on about it and honestly i didn't really believe it because when did the rumors start like a couple days ago yeah and i was like oh i just wouldn't talk to anybody i know you were in la and then i saw your stories like weren't you with them both so this is the thing is like it really is amicable and it's not bullshit you know and so it's like i know conscious uncoupling blah blah blah but that's like gwyneth and i actually do love gwyneth now but she i would take a bullet for her right but she can be a little um like it's just so easy i woke up like this vibes and it's kind of annoying yeah but in this case i mean they are i can't even like talk about the bubba of it all because it like breaks my fucking heart i know but like this is they are still like socializing together like we were so the news so i knew about it like a couple weeks ago and then when i got out there we had dinner me and Stasi and Katie.

So of course, like we like talked more about it, but like, I even kind of felt like maybe I felt like as somebody who loves a relationship, like I was like, is there a world in which maybe there could be is like a trial or something?

And who knows what the future holds is, I guess what I'm trying to say.

But like, I also like, but that's the thing about relationships.

You never like, nothing is ever fully set in stone.

You never know.

So I was just kind of like trying to be supportive and not like stick my nose in too much.

Yeah, of course, because it's so hard, especially when you've been together for so long.

and especially when your relationship has been on national television for so long and people just love to criticize.

Yes.

And Tom and Katie like have been the butt of a lot of jokes, which is just annoying.

And now I think like people who, you know, are like trolling them online were like, we, we knew, we were, oh, which is just like such a fucking annoying thing to say.

So I do have to say, I was left kind of breathless by Tom Schwartz's statement, which was just shocking to me because, first of all, he kind of let us know like Katie's the one leaving him.

Katie's the one who's decided this marriage no longer works for her.

She's no longer happy.

Yeah.

Which I love because I think we've seen on the show for a while.

And the show is not everything, but like she deserves more and she deserves better.

Yeah.

And she's just been like, you know, miles ahead of him when I think when it comes to like maturity.

Absolutely.

And so I thought this was such a mature statement.

I'm going to read it because I was like, not to be dramatic, I was breathless.

I was like, I was too.

Okay, so this is what he was.

I was too.

Well, this sucks.

How am I supposed to capture 12 years of love in a fucking canned Instagram caption?

What picture am I supposed to use?

Is there a go-to breakup font?

I wanted to clear the air on some of the rumors floating floating around.

Katie and I are separating.

I'm not quite really used to the D word yet because it's too painful.

Yes, my heart aches, but I'll be okay.

Not looking to evoke any sympathy here.

I'm not the victim.

Not going to write a sad, too, not going to write too sad a song.

I fully respect Katie's decision and we've had a healthy, productive conversation about it.

It would be far sadder if she decided to stay with me while not happy.

After nine years on Reality TV show, it feels a little tone-deaf to say, please respect our privacy, especially while posting this.

So instead, I'll ask you to please be kind.

I don't judge you for any snap judgment if i was watching us on van der prump rules for the last nine years i'd be making them too right perception gets skewed because of seeing snippets of our lives on the show but i'm telling you we had some of the most blissful romantic fun times humanly possible over the course of our relationship.

I'm talking heaven on earth level of joy.

I know.

I'm going to, I'm like, literally going to cry.

I mean, she taught me so much about love and being a better partner.

It's hard not to feel like a statistic, another failed marriage.

I don't look at it as a failure.

As sad as I am, still happy to say there's no anger or bitterness.

Zero.

still so much love for you katie and your family i don't think we were ever a model couple maybe we are a model divorce a dubious title i suppose also i'm aware of the tragedies taking place in the world right now i have perspective i'll be fine so i'll shut up now and say it one last time love you bub always and forever you'll be in my heart on my ass maybe not so much and then a couple pictures like i thought you mean the best pictures ever the last one killed me where he was like passing her like an approximate thing is is like it makes me like annoyed at him because i i felt as a fan of the show, like so frustrated with him over the last couple years.

It's like, your wife is so much smarter than you, so much more mature than you.

Like, she's always right.

And like, you don't listen to her and you don't even like have the amount of respect that you should have for your wife.

Right.

And so, on one hand, I'm like extremely happy for Katie.

I do think like she's going to.

get into another relationship and see like what it's really supposed to be like right but when people have been together for so long and we feel a part of their journey like i do feel like a twinge of sadness like i feel i feel like it's the right thing to do but i just i don't know why i feel so invested I've been watching the show, I guess, for what is it, eight to nine years.

Well, and that's the thing about Kiggy and Tom is like they were so honest about the relationship and their flaws, which made them relatable.

Yeah, but it also, you know, made them victim to like trolls

and people saying really mean things.

So I will say that I was kind of holding out hope.

Like I was like, maybe just do like a, I was like, maybe just do a separation.

Maybe like apart.

Maybe this, that, and the other.

And then when the, so I, like I said, I knew about it a couple weeks ago.

I got up there.

I obviously started learning more about it, but then the rumor started and I was like, fuck.

Because I knew I was going to get asked.

And like on the Taylor Shreker show, I have like people that work at people on my show.

And I'm like, damn it.

Like, and I can't confirm anything, but I also don't like lying.

Yeah, of course.

So, um, and then when we were out there, um, a news story broke that, like, uh, there had been confirmation from James and they fucking dick.

Yeah.

And so, and obviously, like, Kiggy and Tom, that's the thing, too, is what, like, when I say, like, they're like navigating this, trying to figure out how they're going.

Like, they weren't withholding.

They were figuring it out.

Yes, like, they needed like a second to let's like like even in their own relationship talk it through right before they're making this like public statement right and then fucking james kennedy takes it from them he's such a dick every time he makes like a little progress on the show like you just one step forward three steps to like when he's commenting on their shit i'm like get the fuck out of here james yeah but um but the very next day it was ocean's first birthday and we were at jacks and brittany's for it they hosted it which was very nice of them

really nice but it was like very like mermaidy themed cute it was really cute how are jacks and brittany doing they're good good they're really good good.

You know them.

You were at their wedding.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, but I, I mean, I haven't seen them on TV in a while.

Right.

And so I just like.

I always forget that because like they all are so themselves.

And they're so close in your life.

Yeah.

I like forget that they're not on the show.

Kristen.

Kristen Dodie was there at the party.

Good.

I'm so glad.

I love these.

I had a little kiki with Raquel about James.

Oh, was James there?

No?

No, he was not.

She's thriving.

I actually really like her after.

Good.

She was like making it a point to like kind of say to people, like, I get get that you have an opinion about me from that and like i get it too and like i'm a different person now and i'm free so good for her sheena looked right through me per usual

i actually did jock sheena at the

academy of country music awards oh shut up yeah and i saw brock too and i was like shook by brock's girth in person right yeah he is jason momoa Yeah.

Tay, my Tay, who's a, the, a lesbian, yeah, was like, he is the hottest man I've ever seen.

Really?

And it made me furious.

Oh my God.

I did never you know thought that would be hey donna houston i know

right she likes the thicky thick thing

you are sick um so but no she actually we talked at the end but um she has every right to look through me i have talked nothing but bullshit about her for this decade at least you acknowledge that um but yeah so but katie and shorts were there and seemingly arrived together i mean they live like around the corner they still live together they're living together right now yeah okay so um so when i say it's amicable it's like totally not bullshit.

Like, okay, they show up to the party, they were like, you know, a little sadder versions of themselves, but like they were still, they're still friends.

They still in the same friend group.

I saw some people writing, like, there's no way they could be broken up because Stossi was just seen like with Schwartz on Sunday, and she wouldn't do that.

It's like, no, they're all friends of like 10, 15 years.

Yeah, I mean, Schwartz is going to be, yeah, I mean, I mean, it's like their wedding now.

They, the bridal party was like super big before, but like now it's a much smaller guest list.

So it's a smaller bridal party but like shorts is still like very much a part of like bow's bridal groom entourage yeah so no they're actually it's it's amicable good okay i mean genuinely not

it's so sad but i do think it's the right decision for everyone involved i know and i'm looking forward to katie like getting into when when the time is right like getting into a new relationship and seeing like wow

You know, I could be valued.

I know.

I could be with someone, you know, on my level in terms of like emotional maturity.

Yeah.

Emotional intelligence.

Like, I'm excited to.

She deserves that.

And they both deserve to be happy.

Happy, exactly.

I just.

I just honestly, like, I just don't think that they are right for each other, honestly.

I agree.

And I think that they both actually see that now.

Now, too.

But I think that they'll still be friends.

I really,

I don't think it's going to end up like me and Wesben.

Nobody wants enemies.

No.

I have so many.

I can speak to that very well.

Okay.

Next story is a continuation on a story that's been going on for literal months.

Kanye West harassing and terrorizing everyone.

Speaking of enemies,

Kanye West is worried Pete Davidson will get Kim hooked on drugs.

So Kanye West is now concerned about Pete Davidson's influence on Kim Kardashian.

The Yeezy designer went on a social media tear against Pete this Wednesday, saying he's really concerned Davidson will get his ex-wife hooked on drugs.

He said, I'm really concerned that Skeet will get my kids' moms hooked on drugs.

He's in rehab every two months.

It's unclear what made Kanye discuss Pete Davidson's history with drugs, as a comment he screenshotted, that was the picture, was

the way Skeet used Kim's marital status to address Kanye was a sneak diss towards her and she didn't even catch it.

Okay, I can't.

He's it's every day.

It's like a new story about his Instagram.

This is like, you think it's like he can't go any lower and then he goes low, like using someone's substance problems decision against them.

Like that's just so low.

Yep.

And this whole situation like has just made me like really fall in love with Pete Davidson.

I agree.

The way it's just like standing up for Kim and like being such a stand-up guy and like showing up for the kids.

And even being like when he was texting Kanye on Sunday and saying, like, dude, I'll meet with you.

Like, he's a stand-up guy.

And he's like, I have mental health.

So do you.

So he like gets it.

Yeah.

But I mean, Kanye is just out of control.

I know.

And I, when this whole journey first started for Kanye, like being an animal on social media, at first I was like, you know what?

I don't think we should discuss it.

He's obviously, you know, mental health.

Going through like a bout of, you know, issues with his mental health.

Right.

But now it's just been so long where like, I'm so fucking annoyed at Kanye.

Like he might have lost me forever.

Like I'm so done with him.

He will have me because of college college dropout.

Like that album is my everything.

And that also like ages me, but whatever.

But I do think that,

especially with people being like, I had, I have lived with mental health problems, but it's not an excuse to be like this abusive.

Right.

That actually is shining such a light on it where I think we are allowed to be like, listen, I just had this great guy, Jared Lipscomb, on my

show, and he is like a big part of like the Free Britney movement.

And so a lot of the Free Britney people are like on Team Kanye because of like Kim's stuff in the past.

Like it's very like twisted.

Yeah.

And he was saying like, no, I'm sorry, but like mental health issues are not a reason to be like abusive towards other people.

Like there, like there is medication.

There is help at his fingertips.

Especially someone like Kanye.

Who has so much access?

And then you think of like, how this happens to like so many women on like such a small scale and they don't have like what Kim has.

Kim has like, you know, round-the-clock security and all these different like people who work for her and just all these levels of protection.

And it's just like, it's not funny.

Like I don't enjoy like talking about these stories whatsoever.

And like I really have started to like fucking hate Kanye.

He's, he's, you know, he's a control freak.

And we can see it every single day that he's harassing them.

It's abuse.

It is.

And I'm just happy she is Pete.

And he's like,

he really is.

Everything.

Everything.

I know.

Like, what this started out is like, obviously, like a rebound, a flame, but like, I'm now feeling like these two could get married.

Like, right?

No, like the way he's.

It's a real deal.

And they've been through now like so much trauma together.

And that really builds people to, like, bonds relationships.

I can't see them long term, though.

I know, i couldn't but like now i can maybe what what what do you think the deal is with him though because he has these like fast and furious relationships and then like it's like super hot and heavy and they get engaged and then the second they're engaged it burns out like immediately right and it's like is the burning out on behalf of pete or of the lady i mean

it's got to involve him to some degree deliver you know kate beckon sale ariana grande you're right like but this kim thing has been going on since october so it's not like nothing i don't know do you feel like he got like is there any world in which he just got like cast for the new Hulu shoe?

Like Hulu show.

Like that's his job.

Do not spew that Kardashian.

That is, okay, that shit bothers me so much.

Like how every, like, everything, it's, you know, it's so funny.

It's actually really similar to what people say about Taylor Swift.

Like, how everything she does, like, has to be like some sort of calculated thing for her image.

Like, like, she's never just lived.

Can people just live?

She's living hard lives.

No, and like, can I live?

Yes, she can live.

It's fine.

It's real.

It's real.

Did you see the trailer for the Hulu show?

Yes.

I thought it looked amazing.

I had chills.

Chills.

Everywhere.

Everywhere.

I've turned the corner on the Kardashians.

I'm like finally fucking on board.

Okay, my God.

I mean, it's way long overdue.

I know.

I shouldn't even be allowed.

Do you think it was internalized misogyny from you being in the closet?

Yes.

Okay.

Now nobody can come for me.

Right, right.

No, like you have a reason.

Let me just drape my gay cloak over myself.

Okay, next story is about Rihanna.

Pregnant Rihanna says she's in, when she's in her third trimester, no, says she's in her third trimester, and she will be psycho about protecting her baby.

So Rihanna's not playing around about her baby on the way.

During a recent interview with Elle, the pregnant 34-year-old singer opened up about her future life as a mom, sharing that she's entered her third trimester.

Wow, I thought she was so much earlier on.

The artist who's expecting her first baby with ASAP Rocky said that...

As a fan of the Real House Ice franchise, she thinks her parenting style to be similar to the Real House Eyes in New Jersey's Teresa Jiu Diche.

Oh, geez.

Teresa from Jersey does not play about her kids.

She will flatten you about those kids, and that resonates with me a lot because I feel like that's the type of mom I'm going to be psycho about it.

The Grammy Wimmer, the Grammy Winner, then quipped that she'll actually be worse than Judici, adding, you'll talk about my kids, it's over.

Oh man, that's iconic that she referenced the real house size of New York.

She loves Bravo.

I know.

Heather Gay's her favorite, right?

Is she?

Yes.

Heather Gaye might be my least favorite housewife to ever grace the stage.

We must discuss.

Well, I will say this.

I've always loved Heather.

Whitney, I have like my finger on because I can't quite tell with her.

I loved Heather, and I really loved Heather the first season, and she's had such a fall from Grace.

Like, she's the way she acted this entire season was disgraceful and embarrassing and beyond messy.

For me, it was the reunion that sealed the deal of me being like, Come on, Heather, get it together.

No, and you're better than this.

Whitney and Heather were so controversial.

Whitney's about to influence.

Yes, Whitney and Heather were so out of control, they actually made me feel bad for Lisa Barlow.

Me too.

I love Lisa Barlow.

I kind of love her too.

She can call me a whore all she wants.

Yeah, I mean, and I did fuck half of New York.

And I like ride or die wholeheartedly for Meredith Marks.

See, that's where we have to differ.

Yeah.

Really?

Meredith Marks?

Yeah.

She's 100% right about everything.

Tell me what she did wrong and I'll fight you on it.

Her outfit choice.

Okay, that's not.

Agreed.

But see, that's what someone would say who doesn't have a legitimate gripe with Meredith Marks.

I know I went low.

Do you have a legitimate right with Meredith Marks?

Because I'll fight you on it.

The way she speaks.

I mean, she's a chamin's annex.

Again, again, low, blow.

Say something concrete.

Say something wrong she actually did.

Was not a good communicator about when her dad's memorial was.

What the fuck does she owe these women?

Seriously, what the fuck does she owe these women?

She just comes across like...

And in the reunion, I think

she's hiding something when I'm actually in relation.

She's not.

I think maybe she just doesn't want to share her lives with these women because they're fucking evil and they turn on each other every 10 seconds.

And as Andy Cohen said to Ramona, then don't go on a reality TV show.

Right, it's a job.

And I think she participates.

She shows up to everything.

Mary shows up to nothing.

That's also fair.

She shows up to everything and she gives it a a go.

She, okay, she was Team Mary.

Ride or die for Mary.

The women left her out there to die with her only life raft being Remy.

I mean, Remy.

I'm one of them.

Mary.

Every single woman on the show, like, turned their back on her.

She had no fucking friends.

I guess so.

We've seen a lot of housewives in that debate.

Dan merred it so hard.

She's right.

This makes me so upset in our friendship because we are always on the opposing sides and housewives.

Bethany versus Jill.

Where were you?

Oh, Jill was at Ocean's Party.

Isn't that wild?

What?

I I know.

I was like shook.

I would say back in the day,

oh, it's so hard to transport back there.

I guess I would have to say Bethany, but like now in retrospect, Jill.

I was team Jill from the start.

Okay, so I guess we're not totally on opposite islands.

No, but even though in the Bethany vs.

Jill saga, in the moment, like Jill was wrong.

Like she was just being so hard on Bethany.

Right.

For like for what reason?

For what?

She was like, I'm the boss of you.

And, you know, do whatever.

That's how our dynamic shifted and Jill wasn't ready for it.

Exactly.

But back to Rihanna.

Yes, please.

What do you think about her pregnancy style?

Like, everywhere she goes, her belly's out, which I fucking love.

I'm here for it.

I think she's such an icon.

I mean, I just like can't believe that someone gets to be her child.

I know.

The depths of jealousy that I go into, I'm like so mad at my mom that she's not Rihanna, you know?

No, that's true.

I know.

How dare she?

And your dad's not ASAP Rocky.

Oh, how dare my dad?

I mean, I won't even speak to him anymore because he's not a billionaire.

Oh, like, stop wasting my life.

That might be one of the most fucked up things you've ever said.

And that's like a long list of things.

Oh my God.

No, you're right.

Like Rihanna's baby's like just like so blessed.

And what do you think?

What is your like now that, you know, two of my sisters have babies, like I think about this a lot, like, you know, posting your baby on social media.

And now like a lot of your friends have a lot of games.

Like, what are your thoughts on it?

You know, I'm like,

I think I'm totally fine with it, especially moving forward.

I mean, like, if I'm going to have this child in my life and pay for all of its shit, it needs to pull its own weight and do so on social media.

100%.

You know, so I, that's why I'm also very much here for it.

I don't know.

I mean, there's sometimes with Taze, only because Tae's sister is private on Instagram where like we post our nephews and I get like pangs of like worry.

I know.

She doesn't care.

She doesn't care, but like I just get nervous about it.

And then like, I'm like, God forbid anything bad happened.

Like if it was your fault.

So I guess we shall see.

Yeah.

But like I'm very, I'm very cautious with other people's kids.

Like before I post about Hartford, I asked Aussie like always.

because now I'm like in a family where we don't post our kids on social media.

No.

How does how does that I mean

I totally respect it especially when we've been through some of these scandals that we've been

we've seen like a particularly dark disgusting corner of the internet Yep.

One that you would never want to expose a child to

and I totally I agree with their decision.

I just don't know what I'm gonna do.

What do you think Krihana is gonna do?

I think she'll be protective as fuck.

I think it's becoming more and more popular for celebrities to not show their kids on social media.

And I actually think it's the right decision.

People are so fucking crazy.

I think that's why she's showing her stomach so much because she's like, this is the last time you'll see this baby.

And you're never going to get another album.

Ever.

Ever.

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Okay, next story is, oh, okay, I need to, I know you are not familiar with the Flipper Flop drama.

I'm not, but Flipper Flop has officially been canceled.

Thanks to Tarek El Musa's complicated love life.

Okay.

Oh, so it's okay.

Tarek from like selling sunset.

Yeah, okay.

So years ago, there was this couple, Tarek and Christina El Musa, and they had a show called Flipper or Flop.

Okay.

And they were like a bargain basement version of Chip and Joe.

Like they have the tackiest style.

Their homes are heinous.

And they like clearly hated each other.

But like, I think it did pretty well for HGTV.

Okay.

Then one day, like, it was a perfect family, you know, and they had like multiple kids.

One day this news story comes out.

It was like a live reporting from TMZ.

Tarek.

fled the house wielding a gun.

Stop.

Went into the mountains.

There was like a helicopter chasing him.

It was chaotic.

Stop.

Chaos.

Then we never heard what happened.

Like, it was just like silence.

And then they shortly after got divorced.

Okay.

Well, yeah.

Which was just like, you know, fans of the show were like, obviously, this is the end of the show.

It's like a couple.

Right.

But then they started to do the show like as divorced parents.

And it was like, okay, fine, whatever.

Did they hate each other a little bit less?

No.

Like, the show totally went downhill, but like they kept the jig up.

Okay.

Then they both started having like the most bizarre romantic lives.

Like Christina, the wife, has been like married and

divorced, I think, once or twice.

Stop.

She was married to or date, yeah, married to Aunt Anstead, who's now dating Renee Zellweger.

Jesus Christ, it's just so weird.

Now she's engaged to another guy whose sister used to host a podcast with Heather, Ray Young.

Like, no, it's so twisted.

And messy.

Somebody once made a TikTok of like all the relationships they've had since they've got divorced and how they're all like inextricably linked.

Are they torturing each other through dating?

I don't know.

So they're just like so beyond messy.

Is Heather Bay a pawn?

Yes.

Really?

But all this time, the show has just like limped along,

reflecting where they're at in their lives.

But as of this week, the show has officially been canceled.

Are you excited or sad?

I mean, I haven't watched the show in years.

It's literal trash.

But after nine years, the exes Tarek and Christina Al Musa have vaguely announced that they're ending their popular HGTV series, Flip or Flop, without giving viewers a real reason why.

But now, page six says there seems to be one.

Christina, who's now Christina Hack,

initially said she was filled with gratitude to have filmed 10 seasons of the show, but didn't mention her ex-by-name in the social media posts.

Okay.

She wrote, bittersweet news to announce.

It's the end of an era.

Next week's episode of Flipper Flop will be the series finale.

Oh, wow.

She gave fans like no

heads up.

Heads up.

Meanwhile, Tarek, who shares 11-year-old and six-year-old with Christina, announced his appreciation for the viewers who supported him over the years and teased a new project.

He said, you watched me beat cancer.

Oh my God, I didn't know that.

You've watched the babies grow into the most amazing little humans and everything in between, but I'm not going anywhere.

And I can promise you that you're going to love what comes next.

So a source told the Post that following Tarek's marriage to Heather L.

Musa, staying on the show made things complicated.

The insider said, it's not ideal to have two exes who share children working together so closely while their significant others are just standing by.

Right.

El Musa proposed to Heather in August 2020 and they just got married.

So I guess, is Tarek trying to make it seem like he's going to continue on the show alone?

It's kind of how it sounds.

I mean,

they're both swinging.

They're both horrible, but Tarek is 100% worse.

Oh, really?

Well, he was the one who went into the mountains wielding a gun.

Well.

And he's the one who's always yelling at Christina on the show about like her expensive tile.

Stop.

So yeah, maybe him and Heather are incoming.

I'm going to see that because they really like ride or die for each other and they work together as this like fame thirsty couple.

So they're great for each other.

And she's also like, she knows from real estate, also like interior design a little bit, probably better than tacky pants over there.

That's actually a great point.

So maybe she's just like sliding in.

Oh my God.

Christina

will die.

Formerly El Musa, now hack, will not be well.

No.

Deeply on.

Because like Tarek and Christina were like thirsty in their own, right?

But Tarek and Heather are next level.

Are 2.0.

Yep.

Like beyond.

I mean, the People magazines drops every single day.

Like here is Heather Rae Young's favorite cupcake recipe.

Like there is

my favorite nail polish color.

Any people they could get written up about, they do.

Heather Ray Young, here's what's in my purse.

Like beyond.

So thirsty.

I would do here what's in my purse.

But do you think their show would be on Netflix?

Yeah.

That's the other thing.

They're like, so HGTV, you said?

Yeah.

They're like.

Level up.

Or Discovery Plus, but I don't think Heather Rae Young could do both.

No, she probably would have to stay on Netflix, right?

Contractually speaking.

Yeah, and they should do a show on Netflix.

Honestly, I'd watch the shit out of it.

Me too.

Right?

Heather has like great style.

She really does.

Great taste.

Great taste.

Great taste.

You know great taste, right?

No, what's that?

Do you want?

I can tell you when we're done.

Oh, okay.

Fine.

My bridal shower.

Okay.

My first marriage.

Oh, okay.

Was literally like a hazing session at a sorority.

It was horrible.

And there was somebody at the shower who was like, it was like my family v his family.

Okay.

And every time I'd open a gift from her people, she would go like this.

Great taste.

Great taste.

Oh, that's fucking funny.

Isn't it great?

And every time I'd open one from my people, it was like side-eye central.

One of my bridesmaids left crying and said, I've never felt fatter or poorer.

And I said, Same.

Terrible.

So now great taste.

Well, speaking of Netflix, our little final story, they have a new show.

Netflix Reality Games is recruiting the streamers, unscripted stars, to compete against each other.

So the reality worlds are colliding in a new Netflix competition series where fan favorites from the circle, Love is Blind and Too Hot to Handle, are going ahead, going going head to head on Netflix reality games.

The streaming service announced on Wednesday their knowledge, speed, and strength will be put to the test as they compete against each other across three separate events.

Contestants include Too Hot to Handles Francesca Farago and Harry Jowsy.

Okay.

The Circles Joey Sasso and Delisa St.

Agath, and Love is Blind's Lauren Speed Hamilton and Cameron Hamilton.

Oh, and Sailing Sunset star Christelle Stouse will host the three-episode series, which just launched on Netflix's YouTube YouTube channel.

Huh.

Wow, who cares?

I thought it was going to be on TV.

YouTube?

That's crazy.

Oh, and the teaser, it appears as though Love is Blind's Matt Barnett hits the ground running, and Amber's there, too.

I mean, I love the OG cast of Love is Blind.

So I actually don't watch the show, but my wife weirdly does because she refuses to watch anything bravo.

Right.

So she's a huge fan.

But I will say this.

My boy, do you know Chris Burns, Fat Carrie Bradshaw?

He's, you need to meet him.

He's amazing.

He just started a podcast with Netflix with one of the girls from Love is Blind season one.

Oh who?

Oh

like if I could well it's called We Have the Receipts.

I pulled it up while I was watching here and I think her name's Lauren Lauren Speed Hamilton?

I'm looking it right now.

Oh my God.

Yes, Lauren Speed Hamilton.

I fucking love her.

She was like the best.

She's married now.

She's been married to someone she met on the show for like a couple years now.

It's really cute.

So, but I feel like, so the whole show is about reality TV shows on Netflix, right?

So, I feel like they're starting to kind of do this like MTV real world rules challenge.

I feel like the Disney Channel games, like it, where everyone is like getting on different teams and wearing the same colors and competing, and it feels a little stupid and childish, but we'll see.

I mean, it's a YouTube show, I didn't realize I thought it was going to be on the streaming service, so I actually won't be able to do it.

I wonder why they're doing that.

Like, it's just like, I mean, they've got some serious slop on there, so just throw that on.

No, it does.

They have such shit on fucking Netflix, and they're still not going to renew the society for a season, too.

Did you ever watch a society?

Uh-uh.

It was one season of the literally the greatest piece of television I've probably ever watched.

Apocalyptic Thingamajiggers?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Apocalyptic Thamajiggers.

Thingama-jiggers, yeah.

I won't spoil it for you, but it's about like this cast of high school kids who end up in like the most twisted parallel universe and it's like really crazy.

Okay.

And we got left on such a cliffhanger and the fucking Netflix canceled it.

It's like the OA.

I don't know what that is.

I'm jealous.

Actually, but then I feel sad because it's just like

and don't the OA.

But if you did, like, you know what I'm talking about.

No, it's so good.

And they have such trash on there.

No offense.

Like, the circle.

Give me a break.

Give me a fucking break.

I know.

By this society season two.

So give me this.

Don't put this on YouTube.

Give me this on Netflix.

Yeah, totally.

Like, Netflix has such weird priorities.

Did you see they announced they're doing a like a real in-person comedy festival?

How so?

Like, they're doing in LA like three days of comedy.

It's like a comedy festival, like Just for Laughs or.

Oh, shit, really?

Yeah, isn't that smart?

That's very smart because they're really at the helm of like comedy.

Like if you get a Netflix special, like your career is made.

I know on Netflix.

Yeah, I know.

It's crazy.

Got to get me one of those.

We'll get you one of those.

Working on it.

Yeah.

Okay, well, those were the fast five.

Taylor, thank you for breaking that down.

Thank you for sharing some insight scoop from the Vanner Prope rules of it all and Ocean's birthday party.

Ocean is Lala's baby, right?

Yes.

Yes.

I get confused between Ocean and Summer because their names are like natural elements and they were born like on the same day.

Is that fair?

That's totally fair.

When I was a kid, I used to be like hella confused by Julia Roberts and Sandra Bullock.

Like they were the same person.

No, they're so not.

They're literally the same person.

They're like brunette white ladies.

Were there ever two celebrities?

Julia, wait.

Julia Roberts and Sandra Bullock.

She has red hair.

Like all the time.

Wait, I'm sorry.

Lizzie, did you hear what Taylor just said?

Julia Roberts has red hair?

Pretty woman.

That was like her breakout role.

She has red hairs.

What the fuck are you talking about?

What the fuck are you talking about?

You know what?

This is going to be the thing that ends our friendship.

Literally, Julia roberts has red hair um like yeah like not all the time but a lot and sandra bullock has like super dark brown hair okay i'm not gonna maybe julia has light brown at times the thing is i'm livid i can't even look at you i'm not gonna defend like me as a child being confused by these two ladies because like sure it was confusing but i will not back down on julia roberts having red hair what the fuck are you talking about that's red that's okay first of all we're looking at one picture where she looks blonde well that yeah she's um and by the way oh and and bright when I was a kid, she had like curly red.

That's not red, not dark brown.

You guys, let us know in the comments.

Does Julia Roberts have red hair?

Now we're going to dive into Deer Toasters, which is our advice segment.

If you ever want to write in, deartoasters at gmail.com is the email.

We will read your prompt anonymously, and we will do our best to give non-judgmental advice, but no promises.

Yes.

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Yeah, by the way, a million percent use it for like your Taylor Shreker show.

I'm I should start.

It's literally all of our, like we don't have a graphic designer, everything we make, and it takes four seconds.

Oh, I'm and they have an app.

You do it on the computer or your phone.

Okay, perfect.

It's everything.

Okay.

Hey, Claudia and Jackie.

Well, hey, Claudia and Taylor.

Brood.

I'm going to cut right to it.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost five years now, and we've been living together for the past two years.

He's 30 and I'm 25.

Up until I would say a year and a half ago, I started to notice that my brothers, who are 31 and 27, feel some type of way about my boyfriend.

Didn't think too much into it, but then one of my brothers pulled me aside and asked me if everything was okay.

I was taken aback because, yeah, everything was totally fine.

He laid out his concerns about my boyfriend, saying he's controlling and I don't come around much anymore.

Keep in mind, I have a full-time job.

I live about 45 minutes outside of the city with no car, and my one brother lives close to my parents, and the other brother lives with my parents still.

So, of course, they're all seeing each other.

I told my brother it's not as easy for me to come back to the suburbs every time with a random, every time that a random plan pops up.

We moved on from the convo and then about a year later we are at my brother's wedding overseas and I know my boyfriend was beyond drunk and stupid and very annoying, but all of a sudden my parents also mention how they've had enough of my boyfriend.

Let's call him Bob.

So now I'm an emotional wreck.

One moment I'm annoyed with how my boyfriend is acting.

I'm annoyed with how my boyfriend is acting drunk to finding out all my friends and family feel like they don't like my boyfriend anymore.

Now this is my dilemma.

I love my family and I take what they say seriously, but I feel like it has affected my relationship.

I feel like I cannot move on without both sides being happy and all getting along.

But I also do not want him out of my life.

If some sort of understanding does not happen, please help.

What side do you take when family and boyfriends don't get along?

Sincerely, a confused and saddened toaster.

I mean, this is tough because you're obviously like in the relationship.

So

are you saying your relationship's totally fine because it is or because you're delusional and you're being controlled?

Like, you know?

Right, exactly.

Like, I have to assume that your family's never coming from a bad place.

Yeah, but but not a bad place, but maybe a selfish place.

And a lot of times it's easier to blame the new partner or even the long-term partner than it is to actually like blame the person in the relationship.

Right.

Like you're not coming around because you live 45 minutes away and everyone lives on the same block.

Like that has nothing to do with your boyfriend.

Nothing, but it's easy to point the finger.

Right.

And then like if he gets drunk once and it's like, he's the drunk one.

It's like they can't let it go.

I also hate when people make just like blanket statements like he's controlled.

Like, really?

When?

How?

Just give me an example.

So like how I was with Meredith Marks.

They hate his outfits.

Right.

Exactly.

It's like, give me something concrete.

See, you know what?

I feel like, as much as you probably are avoiding these conversations, like, why don't you sit down with them and be like, okay, what are you talking about?

Because I'm not seeing what you're seeing.

So give me some examples of how he's controlling when you felt like I was being controlled.

When he wasn't being a good partner, you can't just say these blanket statements without proof.

I've been every, not surprisingly, I've been in every single role that we just heard in that one scenario.

So like, I have had, okay, so I was married to the business.

You've always been the partner.

I've definitely been the partner that was disliked by the family with wisband.

Great taste.

I wonder why they didn't like me.

I mean, we were, everybody had skin in the game on that one, but my parents started to not like him

in addition to like the fighting with his family.

But he would always do this thing where we would, because we're from New York, right?

So we would be around Boston visiting my parents and it's like a six-hour drive back.

So we would leave and he'd be talking about our dinner reservations on a Sunday night.

And my mom felt like he was excited to leave.

And I was like, no, he's just excited about dinner.

That's like our life is food.

And then we fight and then we eat food.

And that's like how we survive.

And, but she felt like he was being rude because she was so sad that we were leaving.

And then she was like, it is.

But she was like, before him, you'd stay till like late at night.

And I was like, well, that's because I was telling, I was like, and you'd decide for me.

Right.

And now after him, I still like want to leave at a certain time and I still want to eat food on Sunday night.

Yeah.

So that's the thing.

It's that I can't fully blame him.

Like my mom thought my now wife was a seductress when we first got together and was taking advantage of me in my like new divorcee.

So like that's the thing is families can be well-intentioned, but fucking wrong.

That's true.

That's definitely true.

So don't like, and especially if you like your partner a lot and it's really good just between the two of you, there's really no need to like just don't end it because of your family.

Like you also, there's a role that you have to play in like sticking up for your partner.

Like sometimes like with Tay's like friends, oh my God, she had this big friend group.

And I love them, but they're in like now, but in the beginning, Tay was like everybody's closeted lesbian like girlfriend.

Right.

So when I came around, she was like no longer available to them and they resented me for it.

But like it wasn't me, but I'm sure they were like Taylor Shreker's controlling.

She's never around anymore.

It's her fault.

So when you're in a relationship, like I don't know, it depends on who it is and what it is, but like you're supposed to spend the majority of your time like with that person.

Yeah.

It's like healthy and normal.

Right, right.

Yeah.

So I would definitely continue asking questions, never stop asking questions, but don't,

unless they really give you a good reason, sounds like you haven't gotten a good reason to doubt your relationship at all.

No, and getting drunk one night doesn't count.

I agree.

Like we've all been

there.

We've all been the person at a wedding who needed to be carried upstairs by the mayor of a major city.

Yeah, that happened to me.

I mean, I nearly like took Jackie's wedding down.

Oh, you did?

I threw a Chanel bag.

Carl Agefell died two days later.

You left me.

I killed Carl Agefell.

Like in an Uber.

No, my wife left me at the wedding.

I sat at a table with Heather McMahon and her mans and cried and flirted with your male cousins.

Oh, good, good.

I was a shit show.

Oh, my God.

You You know what's so funny?

Like, there was so much going on at the wedding.

Like, nobody even noticed.

You're fine.

I harassed a pop icon.

We'll leave it at that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, good, good, good, good.

Moving on.

Hello, Claudia and Taylor.

Longtime listener, first time writer.

I don't even know how to start this.

So the dear toaster from before the maternity leave made me brave enough, and I decided to write in.

For context, I'm married and absolutely in love with my husband.

For the last year, we've been exploring our sexual fantasies, and we've both expressed wanting a threesome.

Oh, so before, sorry, before we went on maternity leave, somebody had written in being like, this, you know, got, she's a crush at this guy at work and like he asked if she would have a threesome with

he asked if he, if she would have a threesome with him and his wife.

Okay.

And she was, she was the

extra.

Yes.

And so I was all for it.

I'm like, girl, you're young.

Just like you might have to leave your job afterwards.

But like, if you don't like your job, it's fine.

Right.

And Jackie was like, don't do it.

Don't mix business with pleasure.

Jackie was just being like conservative queen, but I was like, go for it.

So that's what she's referring to.

Okay.

Me more so than my husband were into the idea.

He is more into the watching game, but will participate if that's what I want.

The conundrum is that I'm terrified of my public presence.

We're not famous by any means, but oh my gosh, what if someone I know was on one of those apps?

We recently joined one and even paid for a membership, getting a lot of likes on our photos with our faces blurred.

And I'm still too chicken shit to message people back.

We don't want a relationship with anyone, purely just a night of fun.

I trust my partner and he trusts me, so why am I freaking out even though I initiated this?

I know it's not something y'all partake in, but any advice for a wannabe wild woman?

I just feel like this would be so fun, but I'm so anxious for some reason.

Sincerely, I want to to be a wild one.

Okay, so I am a conservative queen as well.

Yeah.

Shockingly, I know.

I'm a conservative queen in practice, but like I really encourage other people to live their best, most wild lives.

I'm just so jealous.

I can't even like begin to think about sharing in the bedroom.

So like, I don't even understand how it would even go.

Right.

So you also have a different dynamic because this girl's in a hetero relationship.

Right.

But I mean, like when she's saying, I mean, if I would take a straight man into our relationship if he paid the bills and wanted to watch us have sex, but that's where it it ends.

Brian Kelly.

But

I mean, listen, she's curious enough to like take those steps.

So obviously there's a desire there.

The only reason she hasn't followed through with it is because she's nervous she'll see someone that she knows on this app.

But guess what?

That person's also on the app.

Yeah.

So you have nothing to be ashamed of.

No, and it's like, just do it.

Or you know what?

Drive like an hour outside your city, like go to a bar, like do it the real, like the, you know, the old-fashioned way?

The old-fashioned way.

If you're nervous about a stranger.

If you're nervous about seeing someone on the app, even though i didn't know they made apps for that i didn't either what's it called well the thing though is

really maybe you'll find claudia on there

literally no by the way the thing is like i could never have a threesome no no either first of all i'm in like so unbelievably jealous and i'm saying so unbelievably famous like everyone would be talking about it so see i'm so unbelievably jealous and so Unbelievably insecure.

Like nobody can see me naked.

If you had to, oh, by the way, that's the real reason I will never have a threesome.

If by some math, like if I wake up one day, it's like freaky Friday and I wake up in the body of like a sickening model, sure, I'll have a million threesomes.

Until that day, absolutely not.

If you had to, like gun to your head, if you had to bring someone into your relationship for one night, like in the bed, would you bring a man or a woman?

Oh, a man.

You shouldn't both.

A man.

Would you be okay with that?

I would bring in a man because I'm so competitive.

Right.

So like we have to bring in the ding-a-ling.

So that way there's like, I'm not comparing my bod.

Right.

I have a really good friend from kindergarten.

Is that who you want to bring in?

And he just got married this past like fall.

And after the wedding, we, he married a man.

Um, and we played spin the bottle.

And I was so jealous, there weren't even words.

So like,

we just, there was just like, I've never played spin the bottle in my entire life.

Like, you guys, I could barely handle gay guys and gay women playing spin the bottle.

Right, so did you have to kiss anyone?

Yeah, but I got to kiss my friend Chris.

Was it passionate?

And it was kind of like everything because we knew each other since we were in kindergarten.

And we were in love in kindergarten, but we weren't allowed to kiss in kindergarten.

No tongue.

I don't do tongue.

I said, Tay, no fucking tongue.

Who did Tay kiss?

She got to kiss Chris's husband, Zenin.

Was it just the four of you?

He's going to fucking kill me that I'm saying their names on the channel.

Was it just the four of you?

No, it was like a lot of people from the warning.

Oh man, that actually sounds so fun.

It was fun, but also not.

Do you know what I'm saying?

I would leave crying.

Like if Ben kissed anyone, I would seriously like die.

But so afterwards, Tay was like, well, because we want to have kids and we're gonna look at sperm donors yeah and she was like well if we want to have kids with chris and zenin we could do it the old-fashioned way right biggest fight of our life

so that's like say a man even a gay man i could get in a fight with that is so funny and i saw chris recently and i was like if we come they're gonna be like in france i was like if we come to france with you like no no joke like don't even joke about an orgy right and he was like no after spin the bottle i understand like you're psychotic because then the both of you could get pregnant and then you could both have babies for both of you i know right it'd be so cute i know but i can't handle it.

No, of course not.

But anyway, live your best life, girl.

Yeah, I think just like, if it's something you really want to do, like, just do it.

And if you're worried about seeing someone else on the app, just remember that person's also on the app.

They're worried about seeing other people.

They're not going to be looking at you.

They're going to be like, is anyone looking at me?

It's fine.

Just do it.

It's obviously a fantasy of yours.

And I feel like you'll be really excited after it's done.

Yeah.

Do it.

And also, if you do do it, can you let us know how it went?

Yeah, so we always encourage people to write in with updates.

They never do.

And it's so fucking annoying.

They just leave us hanging.

Just write us in with an update.

All right, here's our third and final one.

Okay.

I'm seeking some friendship advice.

I've met my friend almost two years ago out drinking one night.

For some background, I'm in my mid-20s, and my friend Anna is in her early 30s.

Anna recently broke up with her toxic boyfriend and moved out of his apartment to live by herself.

Before moving out, we probably saw each other every other weekend.

Now that she lives by herself, all of her free time isn't consumed by him.

She's been up my ass and I cannot handle it.

She texts me every single day and sometimes multiple times a day.

I'm not the biggest texter.

You.

The look.

I have a long-distance boyfriend and we don't even text as frequently as she texts me.

The texts have started to give me the friendship ick.

It's really the only way I can describe it.

I got this term from watching too much Love Island.

Every little thing is starting to annoy me with her now, and I don't know what to do.

Do I just start ignoring her texts?

I've tried this before, and she then she thinks I'm mad at her.

I don't think I feel comfortable telling her because I don't want her to think that I'm not there for her.

I attached a recent text thread so you can see what I mean.

Any advice is appreciated.

Okay.

The girl wrote, Hope you had a good night.

Wish you guys were here tomorrow night.

Love you.

Sleep well.

That's at Thursday, 9:50.

Okay.

Friday, 5:20 p.m.

hi baby

saturday 9 13.

hope you're having a good weekend my babe

sunday 11 56.

love you

yeah that's like that's like a guy who like wants

that's really look like that's oh wow

in this life there's two kinds of people People who have overwhelmingly blue text messages and people who have overwhelmingly gray text messages.

If your message threads with your friends and family are all blue, meaning you're the one who sent them, like you need to reevaluate your life and like spend less time on your phone and maybe realize the people in your life like don't fuck with you.

And if you have so many gray messages, that's like, oh man, I'm so popular.

Maybe I should respond to more people in a time of question.

How many unopened text messages do you have in your phone right now?

Today?

Yeah.

Want to take a guess?

Yeah.

Guess.

764.

More?

1,212.

Oh, my God.

That's psychotic.

You want to know how many I have?

11 because they've acquired while I've been sitting here.

And I'll open them after and respond to them accordingly.

Listen, a lot of that's from like Drizzly.

I order a lot of alcohol.

Yeah, I know, but why don't you just open them and then like, why do you have to leave them unopened?

I don't know.

I feel like they're like, somehow they're going to hack my identity.

Oh, my God.

You are showing your age here at the morning toast.

Oh, man.

Well, let's have this girl.

Like, the thing is, do you want to be friends with this girl in perpetuity or you've seen what you've seen and you're good?

Like, because if you're done with her, just stop answering.

But it is kind of rude to like leave someone when they're going through a hard time.

Like, I know.

You could be next, you know, like, it's always easy to be like high and mighty when things are going well for you, but you know, we're all like minutes away from an impending something, losing our job, breakup, mental breakdown.

And so, like, if you're not there for the people in your life who are going through a hard time,

they're not gonna fucking be there for you either.

And karma's a bitch.

And nothing, I always think when things are going well for me, I'm like, oh, something bad's about to happen.

Like, I know.

And, you know, like something bad like went on in my personal life like

eight months ago and now I feel like oh my god it's only been eight months since like something bad has happened to me like I'm ready for my next bad thing oh god I know I get it terrible way to live I feel like maybe develop some sort of a system like you can take the weekends off but then like give her like a phone date like I don't know on a God like when they're sitting there yeah give her maybe something because she's going through it right now but like I also understand like especially on the weekends.

Yeah, just though she's reaching out because she like needs someone to talk to.

Like, isn't that sad?

But that's, yes, it's sad, but it's also responsibility.

And obligation is like, like, nothing triggers me more than obligation.

A burden.

Like, I love a bitch that's like, hey, let's do something, but also, we also don't have to.

Yeah, I also love a friendship, and I feel like our friendship is like totally.

We never need to talk.

We really don't talk.

Never.

But then it's like, we'll have to go for like, you know, a bi-monthly meal to catch up on everything.

Yes, but then we do.

Yeah.

And I just don't really believe like friendships.

If you live in the same city as the person, friendships should be maintained via text message.

Like you don't need to be texting your friends all that much unless there's like something going on.

It's like, let's go out to eat.

We'll catch up on everything we could have texted about for a week.

yep i had a friend from college we're not friends anymore i asked her to please downgrade me because she required too much yeah and there was a point where she was going through something hard genuinely hard a parent was passing away it was awful horrible horrible and one of our mutual friends like said to me hey um something just happened um there was like addiction involved so that's like why it was like such a long drawn out thing and our friend was like oh something bad happened with so-and-so's parent just text her So I texted, I said, hey, so-and-so told me about something that happened.

How are you?

And she said to me, you know, that's really annoying that someone had to tell you.

And I said, why?

I'm like, I didn't know.

Like, if you need me, please let me know and I'll be able to be there for you.

And she was like, no, I need friends that check in so frequently that they know what's, what I'm going through.

And I said, well, girl, like, I, I want to be there for you, but I can't like change my complete genetic makeup.

Yeah.

So some people are like that.

Like, and I have a lot of friends who I actually feel bad who like text all the time.

Like they're so good.

And like, if it weren't for them, like maybe we'd never keep in touch.

But like for me, I'm just not that girl.

Like text me, we'll go to lunch and we'll catch up on everything.

Yeah.

If you need me, you need to let me know you need me.

Yeah, me too.

And I'm never shy about like telling my friends, like, I need you to show up to this.

Exactly.

So, with this girl, like, I guess, just evaluate where you want to have this friendship be at, but also don't be a bitch because she's obviously going through something.

Yeah, exactly.

I'm gonna kill you to have a little compassion.

Maybe give her, like, I don't know, what should she give her?

Once a week?

Xanax?

Super Xanax.

In-person hang once a week?

That's a lot.

We don't even hang out that much.

I know.

So what should she give?

Once a week phone call.

Fine.

For like the next two months.

FaceTime.

Yeah, FaceTime.

Zoom FaceTime.

That's fine because you could answer emails while also still being a, you know, exactly.

And you don't have to like walk out your front door.

Right, right, right.

Which is the worst thing.

The hardest part.

Well, that was Dear Toasters.

And if you guys ever want to write in, the email is deartoasters at gmail.com.

That's how you can get to us.

And we'll always keep your shit anonymous.

And we'll try our best to give good, healthy advice.

That is our show.

Yes.

That was Taylor Strecker on The Toast.

She will definitely be back while Jackie's on maternity leave.

So tomorrow we've got Sophia Franklin, and the next day we have Josh Peck.

So it's a great lineup for the rest of the week.

Taylor, you're a queen.

If you guys liked what you heard here, the Taylor Strecker Show on Patreon is two hours of daily radio Monday through Friday.

It's patreon.com/slash the Taylor Streker Show.

Yep.

Amazing.

And follow Taylor on Instagram.

She needs the followers.

Please.

And I love you guys.

Thank you so much for listening to The Morning Toast, The Millennium Morning Show.

Julie Roberts does not have red hair.

Thank you so much for listening.

If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

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Taylor, I love you.

Toasters, I love you.

Have an amazing day, and we'll see you tomorrow.

Happy Hump Day.

Bye.