S4 Ep155: Ballsack Towel with Lauryn & Michael Bosstick, The Skinny Confidential: Wednesday, September 1, 2021

Good morning Millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy hump day.

Yes, it's hump day.

A beautiful, beautiful day, also made more beautiful by the fact that it is September 1st and the weather is positively gloomy.

It is so stunning to behold.

You know what it is?

It's a great day to make a chili.

It is a great day to make a chili.

Interesting.

Now I need to replan my whole day.

I'm thinking I'm going to make a chili.

Okay, I mean, you are you talk a big chili talk.

I should have to say when I say I'm making a chili it means I'm getting the ingredients for benefit to make a chili.

That works.

A chili is a chili.

It doesn't matter who made it.

Wow, that's beautiful.

Thank you.

We have an amazing show for you guys today because here's what's going to happen.

First of all, yesterday we podcasted all day.

All day long, almost five hours of podcasting.

We got your toast yesterday and then we went to meet Michael and Lauren Bostick of the Skinny Confidential His and Her podcast.

And we recorded their podcast, which will be out soon.

And they were on our podcast, which is going to be at the end of today's episode.

And I'm just so excited for you guys to hear.

Like, honestly, I was thinking about Lauren all day.

Me too.

I could, we talked to them for so long, but I could have talked to them forever.

I think they're so interesting.

They're such a fabulous couple.

She's just like, has so much knowledge and information.

And she just seems like this person.

Maybe, I don't know if that's true, but she has this confidence that like she has her fucking life together.

And like every time I, I remember feeling this way, like, the last time we podcasted together, I just feel like I'm so jealous of like this assuredness you have, like, in your life.

Yeah, I feel that.

And I was just like, you know where you're going.

Yeah, and she's going places.

She's going back to Austin.

Both of them are.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

It was a really good episode.

We talked about just like literally everything.

So that'll be at the end of today's episode, which I'm really excited about.

Yes.

And then, of course, we have the Fast Five Stories.

I believe they'll be extremely fast today.

And then there was the abomination, atrocity, the disgrace that that was the Real House Rise of New York season finale, where I could not tell you one thing that happened.

I couldn't even recite back to you.

That's how forgettable it was.

Okay, I will do my best to remind you, but it was so bad.

I can't believe that was a season finale.

Probably the worst season finale we've ever seen.

Next week isn't even reunion.

It's like unseen crap ola from a season that was so shitty it didn't make this shitty season, but it's making its own episode.

Because they literally filmed the reunion last week.

It's not ready yet.

Like, and if they torture us with more than one part, let's just kill this horse, okay?

We're going to do at least two parts.

You know the thing.

What's the, they shoot dead horses, don't they?

Like, leave it alone.

Let bygons be bygones.

And let's just put this absolute atrocity to bed and forget it.

Like, let's forget it.

It was so, so crazy.

It took me forever to watch it.

I was just, like, on my phone.

I was just doing a million other things.

Laundry.

Anything.

Hanging with Brew.

Yeah.

Brew almost came today.

The rain.

That's why Theo didn't come.

No, it's just like, then I got to pick him up.

And, you know, it's a little stressful as opposed to just just being on autopilot when I come in.

I know.

Now you understand me.

I do, but I miss that man.

I miss him.

He's an amazing man.

An amazing man.

We also spent yesterday recording more podcasts.

We recorded a Patreon episode, our final one for August.

And we did an entire book episode.

So not only did we go through all the books we've read this year, rate them, talk about them, tried not to give too many spoilers, but then we also did a Q ⁇ A just about our reading habits, our favorite books.

It ended up being really fun.

And I think it was like one of the longest Patreon episodes.

It was like way over an hour.

Yeah.

And we just got carried away with the literature.

That's what happens when you talk about books.

This is what I've been saying.

Like if you meet someone at a party and you guys both read and like you like Colleen Hoover, you can talk forever.

You know, let's talk about that.

Because I kind of wanted to talk about this in the podcast, but we ran out of time.

When you talk to someone about books, like at least for me, like...

I put my best foot forward.

No, no, that's well, of course.

I'm not like saying Colleen Hoover.

Oh, I am.

But what I was going to say was, like,

I find the part of the conversation, like, where I recommend recommend books and talk about the books that I love to be really interesting.

But like hearing other people be like, you should read this book.

I'm like, okay.

Like, it's just, it's not that interesting.

Unless you then get to the point where you both read the same book.

Then that's like a funny, you know, interesting conversation.

I guess so.

I understand.

If you're just swapping recommendations back and forth, I'm like, yeah, cool.

Yeah.

Try this one.

Yeah.

Obviously, you're more passionate about the books that you've read.

But if you are talking to like a reader who you actually think you have similar tastes as, like, it could be good to get a recommendation from them.

That's how you discover great books.

Like, the best books I've gotten are recommendations from people.

Whoa.

And, like, I think you would like this.

I get all my recommendations from you.

So.

Right.

And they're all great.

And you love every book that you've read.

And I love all my new toys, like this one, the Love Island Water Bottle that I'm drinking Lemon LaCroix out of.

Mm.

You like your water bottle?

I do.

It's so cool.

I wish I got one for myself.

Yeah, why didn't you?

I don't know.

I was just, like, I wasn't even thinking about me.

What if you're so selfless?

Who cares what I need?

Everyone.

You need to hydrate.

Everyone is worried about you.

Everyone.

Thanks, guys.

Other, so new Patreon episode is up all about books.

And speaking of books, we're recording the Redheads tonight.

Oh, my God.

This is like my seventh podcast of the week coming up.

Yeah.

And it's Wednesday, and we didn't do a show Monday.

So

if you read We Are the Brennan, submit your questions to the Redheads book club at gmail.com.

And if you haven't read it and you like to read or you're curious, definitely read this one.

It was really good.

I spoke to the snatcher last night.

She said she like literally, and I don't know if she was like selling it extra hard because it was her selection.

She was like, it was the best book I've ever fucking read.

That sounds like the snatcher.

Yeah.

Like promoting her own shit.

Yeah, no, she gets like really,

when it's someone else's book, she has no time for it.

Yeah, that's so counselor.

So counselor.

And when it's her book, oh my god, it was amazing.

Like literally like Encyclopedia Britannica.

Yeah, because like, because what happened, like...

The fact that Before We Were Strangers was a snitch's pig and it's the most popular book.

Like, she just rides this high.

It's been like a year and a half.

Yeah, I did read that one.

It was really good.

Yeah.

So I'm excited for the Redheads, see the girls, you know, get back together, see what everyone thought.

It's never too late to become a Redhead.

It's such a fabulous community and one in which I think you all should be joining.

And obviously a community of really kind of well-read, obviously, smart, you know, readers with taste because they did vote Girl With No Drop, The Crazy, Beautiful Life of an Instagram Thursday Monster, the second best Redheads book that they read last year.

So, I mean, I was expecting to come in last, I'm not going to lie.

So I'm not even mad at Renee.

Yeah, and you read that book and you loved it.

Loved it.

It was so good.

My book was definitely not better than hers.

Well, my book is really good, and it's available on Amazon, Kindle, Barnes and Noble, all the places, international Canada.

Yeah, that's right.

Canada.

Eat some poutine while you read my book.

Is that Canada?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Poutine, yeah.

So what else?

What's going on?

That's it for me, really.

Just busy day.

And then watched Roni.

So I'm excited to chat about everything.

Every ting.

I listened to more of Donda today.

Mm-hmm.

Then it's a song 24.

Banger.

You heard it here first.

Okay.

I'm thinking radio play.

Okay.

I'll check it out.

I didn't listen to Donna this morning.

I just listened to my liked songs and it was quite enjoyable.

I mean, I don't know if this is,

I don't know if I've spoken about this on the podcast yet.

Do tell me if I have.

But I've recently discovered,

not discovered, but just realized, someone pointed it out, that I'm a

very big creature of habit.

Have I told you this story?

No, I don't think so.

Because like, I, whenever I'm eating dinner alone, I always FaceTime my friend Abe, so I like have some company.

And he's like, what are you eating?

And I'm always eating the same thing.

He's like, you're really a creature of habit.

I'm like, you know what?

Yeah, I am.

Like, I refuse.

If I find one thing I like, even if there's something better out there, like, I will stick with the one thing that I like.

And now that I know this about myself, I've just become like more aware of it.

Where was it going with the story?

I don't know, Donda.

Yes, thank you.

So when it comes to listening to new music, I actually like have a really hard time.

I'm like, I would much rather listen to a song from 35 years ago.

Yeah.

Then even, I have not been able to listen to Ben Platt yet.

Like it takes a lot for me, unless it's obviously like Taylor Swift or like but just like new music that I know I would like.

No, I think I'll listen to this old Ben Platt album 45 more times.

No, I agree.

Especially I feel like when I was younger, maybe when I was just like in a different environment like working and stuff, it was like fun to listen to new albums as I sat at my desk.

Yes.

But now it's like I only have so much time with music.

I want to spend it on the songs that I know that I love.

And the ones that like bring me joy.

Like I don't know if an unknown song is going to bring me joy.

Yeah, I listened to like half the Ben Platt album.

One

song stuck out to me.

The others just like weren't, it wasn't like the last album.

Like, you don't have to worry about you know, having an emotional breakdown.

Well, I listened to it in full while I was reading a book and like it all just like flew by, and I didn't even notice the it was just like a reverie, it was so like a reverie, like a reverie.

What's the Adele song?

River Lee, River Lee, The River Lee.

Um, okay, well, then I think we should just dive in because you know, like, we are girls who know what they want.

Yeah, I think we should dive in.

We can't avoid these stories any longer.

Trust us, we've tried, we tried.

So, without further ado,

dot do,

dot do,

dot do,

it is time for the fast advice stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

Oh, my turn?

Your turn.

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Thank you.

That's just like a genius product.

Like, why?

Yeah.

Why hasn't that been?

Well, now we know.

Now we know.

First story: Vanderpump Rule's moms reunite with all their babies.

Do you see this picture?

I did.

The Vanderpump Rule stars and new moms, Lala Ken, Brittany Cartwright, Sashi Schroeder, and Sheena Shea gather together with their babies for the first time for a mom's day out.

It's seriously so crazy.

I know.

Like, one, it's crazy that this is the first time we're seeing all the Vanderbabies together.

I feel like they've been together, but without Sheena.

Yeah, but then it's just so crazy how all of this happened at the same time.

And it's so crazy, like, we're not going to see any of it.

And we didn't see any of of it.

Yeah, but like looking at this picture, I was just like, where are the cameras?

No, looking at this picture, I'm like, yeah, that's so cute.

Like, oh, if only they had a reality show.

Oh, wait, they did.

And not only did they not film during COVID, half of these people are fired.

Right.

Exactly.

But, like, the kids look the exact same age.

They're so cute.

They really are all the exact same age.

Yeah.

And all of them are girls except for Brittany and Jacks' son.

So he has like all these.

That's so jacked.

That's so jacked.

We're like his son is going to be like the number one guy in the group.

He's officially the number one guy in the group.

We We spoke about this with Lauren and Michael on I don't know if it was our podcast or theirs because it was so many podcasting hours.

Oh yeah, I did tell them what we spoke about on ours because we can't differentiate it from what we spoke on theirs.

I want to I actually believe it was theirs.

No, I think it was us.

About Vanderpump Rules.

Yeah.

Like she was like so jazzed about the new season and I'm like, what are you talking about?

Like I'm so nervous.

Like and I still am.

Like she did not convince me.

I'm feeling jazzed about the new season.

I don't know.

Now it's been so much time that I actually like miss it and I've watched so much bad reality TV that I'm like, where's the good stuff?

Oh, that was Vanderpump rules I know but like now I feel like we're at this place with Vanderpump rules where the people who are OGs like Tom Katie Tom Ariana Sheena like they

are not going to be acting wild they all have so much to lose half of them are parents like it's just not they're not going to be acting wild so then you bring in like these young people who are just so thirsty that like they're fake, you know, Danica, you know, throwing a like it's just so contrived.

There's no middle ground.

That's like, that's the beauty and the curse of a show like Vanderpump Rules.

Like Like at the beginning, they had nothing to fucking lose.

They were all just like hungry for fame and they just turned it around.

Now it's like they're all celebrities.

They have homes to pay for, mortgages, children.

They're not going to be acting crazy.

And then people like Charlie and Danica come in and see like, oh, look, I could have a big house like Stasi.

So let me be crazy.

And it's just not authentic.

Yes.

So I don't know where we go from here for real.

I know, but I feel like I look forward to...

watching them try.

Okay.

Because at least it's something new and interesting.

And I'm just so tired of the crap we've been watching because I'm just having PTSD from last night's episode of Rony.

So am I, but like, I just don't think we should

be grouping all these shows together because we just came off of Love Island, which was a fabulous reality show.

Okay.

Love Island.

Beverly Hills is 10 out of 10.

Beverly Hills is 10 out of 10.

But then we also watch...

Potomac is so good.

Too hot to handle.

Not great.

Garbage.

Not great.

Absolute garbage.

Not great.

I don't know what else I watch, but I just feel like...

Reality TV, like, it's not doing what it used to do for me.

Maybe that's you.

It's definitely me, but it's also the TV.

It's both for sure.

But it's not as bad as you're making it.

I can recognize that it's me because, like, I'm maturing and evolving, and like, I just want more.

Isn't that crazy, though?

Because, like, Real Housewives used to be a show for older women,

but now it's not even good.

No,

it's me, and it's the shows.

Like, everyone can agree that these shows are just not.

And if it wasn't for like Erica Girardi's

scandal of the year, like, Beverly Hills would be.

Let me ask you a question.

Hmm.

Let me remember the question.

Hold on.

Okay.

Take your time.

Can you go back to what you were saying?

I've changed.

The shows have changed.

Gerardi is when I was like,

Yes, okay.

So, do you remember like most recent season of Orange County was so atrocious, and obviously, they went in, and like Heather's back, and they have all these new girls.

How do you rate that really bad, like, low-point rock-bottom of OC for what we just witnessed on New York?

Because I think New York, like, if OC was like a two out of ten, New York was a negative 6,000.

Yeah.

Like now I'm like, OC wasn't even bad.

Yeah.

There's something going on.

OC was really, really bad, but because of like the COVID interruptions and like the way that they had to film.

But like Broadway was being crazy.

Like there was like Elizabeth Vargas was like sharing her life story.

There was something there.

I agree.

There was nothing there last night.

There was nothing there last night.

Okay, we'll get to it.

We're moving on.

I can't talk about like just the decline of reality television.

I find it too depressing.

Oh, that's crazy.

Next up, Mike Richards has been fired as the Jeopardy executive producer

after the host debacle.

Yes, Richards, who was briefly appointed replacement host for the late Alex Trebek, has been officially disqualified as the EP for both that longtime game show and Wheel of Fortune.

He had stepped down from the coveted hosting gig last week amid public outrage and resurfaced sexist comments.

However, he was expected to remain at the helm behind the scenes while multiple guest hosts cycled through on screen.

Show Insiders confirmed on Tuesday that Richards was also relieved of his executive producer duties.

Okay.

So I feel like there's two things at play here.

One, like, I feel like part of the reason why, no, I would say the reason he got fired from the hosting job is because of the comments that resurfaced on the podcast.

And then I would say the reason he probably got fired from his producing job is because there was many allegations that he had like a hostile work environment and he was like borderline abusive.

So for me, like that actually makes sense.

Like I really don't believe in like firing people because they said something on a podcast eight years ago.

Like that's just even and i by the way i know i haven't seen the comments but i know that they were deemed anti-semitic and misogynistic both of which apply to me and i still just don't think people who should who said something eight years ago should be fired like i really don't but if you actually are actively in real present time like making it a hostile work environment like you shouldn't be a producer Yeah.

Or director, whatever his job was.

Yeah, if that's what's happening, then yes, I agree.

The statement said, I'm writing to let you know that Mike will no longer be serving as EP of Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy effective immediately.

We had hoped that when Mike stepped down from the host position at Jeopardy, it would have minimized the disruption and internal difficulties we have all experienced these last few weeks.

That clearly has not happened.

There's no mention of a hostile work environment that he created.

Oh, I saw that like on social media.

I

saw something of that vein too, but there's no mention of stuff like that.

So to me, this just feels like...

People were still mad that he were still mad.

And that was so late.

It wasn't enough that he lost the job that he needed to lose his job to.

So he went from, you know, having the job that a million girls wanted to literally being unemployed.

Yeah.

Damn.

I just feel like he's one of those guys who people just don't like.

Yeah, that was the vibe I got from that article.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, you said that.

Yeah, that's why it's in my head.

Damn.

Not a good week for Mike Richards.

No, but just crazy.

And in relation to Kyle and Kim?

I don't know.

You should ask him.

Yeah.

Okay, next story.

Courtney Kardashian shares a Bible verse amid Scott Disick Travis Barker drama.

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I'm sorry.

I just have to get that off my jaws.

Okay, I'm happy for you.

I feel better.

Courtney is turning to the Bible after Scott allegedly told another one of her ex-boyfriends that her PDA with Travis Barker was too much.

So she tweeted on Tuesday the only thing that could possibly, the only thing she posted that could possibly be in reference to this, she tweeted, quote, John 15, 7, if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask anything you wish and it will be done for you.

See, I do like, I was inclined to think that Bible verse is obviously going to be related to this whole drama, but I'm not really seeing this particular chapter, how it's applicable.

Me neither.

Like, basically, she's saying because she believes in God, like, God is going to what, like, take care of Eunice and Scott.

Like, I don't know.

I don't know.

I'm not familiar with the story of John, though.

So maybe.

Is that New Testament?

Yes.

So I'm not.

Maybe I'll miss it.

It's possible that it has nothing to do with Eunice.

She might have been a little more direct.

No, totally.

And she should really, like, post like those Chloe quotes that, like, give us more.

Chloe and her quotes.

Chloe is low-key, like, so chewy.

No, it's not.

She doesn't even try to hide it.

Remember when her Instagram bio for like 15 years was, I crave a love so deep.

The ocean would be jealous.

yeah, which is like so something like Sheena Shea like has posted and like has tattooed,

yeah, yeah.

So I don't really see this Bible verse, but I did all then also see like Amelia Gray posted an Instagram and her caption was dot dot dot and now back to work, which was when Eunice did a follow-up Instagram story yesterday to the original DM just being like, I'm tired of being the nice guy, la la la, and now back to work.

Now it is a common phrase, but Amelia is so like, okay, I saw that they two said, both of of them said back to work.

And I think they have nothing to do with each other, personally.

I think it's that common of a phrase.

Also, we didn't even think about yesterday how like Amelia should be offended by the whole situation that like Sakai is out

still thinking, like still plotting and worrying about his totally.

That's actually a really good point that we totally glazed over.

So like now I'm feeling like, you know, they had a bad day yesterday.

Fight, you know, trouble in paradise.

They had a fight yesterday for sure.

No, I feel like their relationship is so unequal.

Like, she's not allowed to raise concerns.

I totally, you know what I mean?

Like, you don't like it?

Leave.

100%.

Like, she.

A million teenage girls would kill for this job.

And, like, you have it, so you're not allowed to complain.

Yeah.

That's really how I feel like the conversations go in their house.

Yeah.

It's so, that's.

So I take back what I said.

I'm sure it was just a regular day in the dissic gray household.

It's so wrong.

It's so wrong.

Whatever.

I'm like happy Courtney's living her best life.

Like Venice al Tamora.

Yeah, and she had like had some delicious pasta last night.

I've been, I guess, like everyone's in Italy right now.

Yeah, for Venice Al Tamora.

True.

And they're all posting their pastas.

And I'm feeling influenced to have like a delicious pasta.

Also, we were talking about Scalinatella with the bossics yesterday.

They went because you know, she posted on her Instagram.

She said it's Blake Lively's favorite restaurant.

I didn't know that.

It's my favorite restaurant.

It's so fucking good.

But then like Sharon posted her pasta.

Let's go for lunch.

Yes.

Okay, cool.

We'll Patreon.

Oh, we'll

vlog it.

Do you think they're open open for lunch?

It's also Sonia Morgan's favorite restaurant.

She said like a quick Google.

Yeah, she said that like she lives nearby and it's like the best date night restaurant.

It's so good.

They cook your pasta for you like right by the table.

It opens at noon.

Oh my God.

And by the way, it'll be empty for lunch.

You have the best penal vodka.

Oh my God.

I can't wait.

Do they do delivery?

No, they do dijour now.

Good one.

No, I just feel like I've been in such a rut recently.

Like all I order is Japanese or Chinese, the same two places.

And like a couple, maybe two weeks ago, I was home alone.

And I'm like, you know what?

I'm going to treat myself.

And I did take out Mr.

Chow and I had it for lunch the next day.

It was such a treat.

It was a million dollars, but it was a treat, you know, not all the time.

But

I got to find some new places.

And if Scalina Tella delivered, like, I would be finished.

Okay.

We'll, we'll find out when we go for lunch.

We'll ask.

I'm going to go.

I'm so excited.

Okay, ready for our next story?

Yeah.

It's more backlash news.

Ugh.

You know, these people, I can't.

It's getting crazier and crazier.

No, like, just wait for just wait for this one.

Sarah Paulson reveals she regrets wearing a fat suit for the Linda Tripp role in Impeachment American Crime story After Backlash.

Sarah Paulson is responding to the criticism surrounding her decision to play the role of Linda Tripp in the upcoming series Impeachment, which revolves around the Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky scandal.

In order to transform into Linda Tripp, the acclaimed actress gained 30 pounds, wore a nearly five-pound fat suit, prosthetic teeth.

Wow, five pounds?

Prosthetic teeth.

No, like it weighed five pounds on her.

Uh-oh.

Prosthetic teeth, prosthetic nose, and a wig to emulate Tripp's signature 90s-style helmet of blonde hair.

Critics believe by taking the role, Paulson prevented a worthy actor with Tripp's larger body shape from getting the role in what will be the third season of American Crime Story.

Hitting.

And in an interview with the LA Times, she didn't shy away from the controversy, admitting that she understands the criticism about the padded suit.

She said, It's very hard for me to talk about this without feeling like I'm making excuses.

There's a lot of controversy around actors and fat suits, and I think that controversy is a legitimate one.

I don't, and I'm a fat person, so I feel like my opinion on this is more important than Sarah Paulson's.

If Sarah Paul, if I am playing,

okay, here's a perfect example: I've just been cast in a movie, Jackie.

Isn't that exciting?

So exciting.

I'm playing Kate Moss.

They just said I need to lose a little bit of weight just to be accurate, seeing as how I'm going to be acting as her.

Right.

Is that great news?

Yeah.

Who cares?

Yeah.

You have to look like the person.

Right.

It's not like it's a fictional story.

It's really crazy.

Also then, okay, so say she was of you know the

same body shape as Linda Tripp, but now she's wearing prosthetic teeth.

Maybe the role should have gone to an actress with Linda's teeth.

No, honestly, I have heard that the people from the, you know, white, like the

the yellow teeth community are very upset.

And I've also heard that the people with, you know, the very slim nose community are upset that she wore a prosthetic.

Yeah.

it's disgusting and they should have let someone with a slim nose have the role yeah no and she also had to wear a wig so it should have been someone with the existing haircut your kid because they took away from a worthy actor with that haircut a wig a wig

i'm done

no this is so absurd i hate the world that we let her in too far it's gone too far i think conversations about like when people are cast you know there's finally like a gay role on disney and they don't give it to like a gay kid like i understand that like let the gay kid have the role.

I really do.

But this, like, for real?

Or, like, even when Jared Leto in that movie, he played someone transgender.

Like, there's no roles for transgender people.

Let someone transgender play the role.

I understand all of that.

But this

weight, it fluctuates.

So you can be fat, you can be skinny.

It's so stupid.

People lose weight for roles all the time.

They gain weight.

So what?

They use a little special effects.

And by the way, I'm allowed to say this.

I'm fat.

So I just want to say, don't fucking come for me.

Oh, so you're just allowed to have an opinion.

Yeah, that's true, too.

Yeah.

Thanks for reminding me.

It's easy to forget.

No, like, do I think I should have had this role?

Yes.

Yes.

Amiath, no.

But you're too young.

And then the role should have gone to a worthy actor of Linda's age.

No, you know what?

The role should have gone to Linda.

Yes, that's what I was going to say.

Like, honestly, where is Linda?

Linda should be playing Linda.

Linda.

No one else is Linda.

And the fact that Linda didn't time travel back in time to look like her,

was she like 40 years old at at the time?

It's disgusting.

Yeah.

This is so stupid.

I literally like...

They really made her look like her though.

Let me see.

Like, okay, so that's Linda Tripp on the right.

Okay.

And then that's Sarah Paulson as Linda Tripp.

Oh, she's wearing a fat suit.

Who cares?

Yeah.

I didn't know that fat suits were offensive yet.

I didn't know.

No, but honestly, like, if this was me and I was Linda Tripp, like, I would just be annoyed that, like...

They're talking about.

Do you guys think I'm fat?

Wait, she should wear a fat suit?

Right.

Like, that's, like, the only person who has the right to be offended is Linda Trebb being like, no, no, like, I'm not fat.

I know everyone's talking about it.

No, that's, you know what?

We should really all just shut the fuck up just for Linda's sake.

Yeah.

If this was me, like, in my biopic and like, they're like, you had to wear a fat suit.

How big was the fatsuit?

We said she had to pick.

How much did she weigh?

25.

Like, that would be...

Like, yeah.

That is fucking rude and embarrassing.

So leave Linda alone.

Also, who's Linda in the story?

Linda is like the woman who was

Beanie's like confidant, who Beanie was like telling everything.

Got it.

Who Monica was telling everything about her relationship with the president?

And Linda was recording it.

I just have to say, I'm so excited about this show.

Like, it looks so good.

I just saw a review, a headline that wasn't positive.

Really?

It means it's probably good.

Totally.

Yeah.

But also, just in terms of this story that we're talking about, I feel like, and this is how I felt about the OJ show too.

Ryan Murphy is known.

At the end of the show for OJ Simpson, and they did side-by-sides of, you know, the actors who played the actual real person, I was floored.

Like, everyone did such a good job of looking and acting exactly like the person that they were playing.

And I feel like that's one of the best parts of a Ryan Murphy show.

So, like, okay, if he thought Sarah Paulson was the best person for the role, should she have not gotten it because she's not fat?

Like,

we're just trying to make a movie here, you know, or TV show, whatever.

Yeah, sometimes it ain't that serious.

Yeah.

But, like, I understand Sarah Paulson, like, she doesn't want to be upsetting the fat community.

But Sarah, like, we're fine.

Okay, good.

I'm glad you let her know that.

It takes a lot to offend the fat community because, like, we've been bullied our whole lives.

They're like, nothing can hurt us.

Sticks and stones, I'm rubber.

You are glue.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

Which is just like a bit of nonsense because all the stories are nonsense.

Is it?

Yeah, this is the only thing that can make the final story better because it's the

final story.

Dude, dude, dude.

Dude, do.

Sorry, wait, this thing sucks.

Okay, and you're

so off.

Off.

You're like literally the guy from Stepbroth.

But that's how bad it was.

Dude, wait.

It's the final story.

This story.

is not worthy of that song.

Oh no.

What's the story?

A selling sunset star.

I think we're going to say something something about Sully.

I fucking wish that would be a worthy.

Did they have Heather Ray's engagement party?

Her bridal shower.

And all the stars turned out.

I don't see Christine there.

No, not everyone was there.

Who wasn't there other than Christine?

Tanica.

Isn't that Tanica on the right?

Let me see.

Yep, Davina.

Yeah, it's Davina.

It says it's a very good thing.

Oh my god, Davina was there?

Maya.

Who's this girl?

That must be a new girl.

Chris.

Oh, Amanza.

Mary.

Who's the girl on the left?

Emma Hernan

and Tina.

Oh, Tina.

Do we know a Tina?

So I guess these are the two new girls, Tina Louise, and my, and Emma Hernan.

So, um, I say, this group of women is like the most best-dressed.

Like, I know that's when I saw this picture.

I was like, they are so like stunning in best dress.

And it's like, I'm sure it's nice to have friends who show up and show out for you, but like, this could be anyone's bridal shower here.

Yeah, except like, Heather's the only one wearing white yeah

but i agree like they updid her for sure chris looks so cute but just because like everyone looks amazing i'm really jazzed davina looks really incredible and she's in the worst spot in the photo she's like all the way at the end in the foreground yeah i'm really excited for the new season of selling sunset i just hope that it's like i feel like so much happens on Instagram and in the press with the Selling Sunset people because they're so famous.

And then like if we're watching a show, it's been so long since they filmed.

If I'm watching something that happened like over a year ago, like, no, I want to see Jason and Chrische pretend to be boyfriend and girlfriend.

Like, that's what I'm interested in.

So, if we're not getting that, and we have to wait till like next season and then they're both already like remarried to new people, yeah, I'll be annoyed.

Yeah, Netflix does need to get better with that, with their turnaround time.

I agree.

I hope it, I hope it happens soon.

Um, but now that I know that people like you can do Love Island, there's no reason like reality shows shouldn't have one-week turnaround times.

I agree, and the Kardashians should have been doing that forever, even like a month, yeah.

Like, we were getting two days, like literally 36 hours later, we were getting episodes from Love Island.

Yeah, it's really so crazy.

It is so crazy.

So anyways, she celebrated a fig and olive also sounds delicious on Sunday for her bridal shower just a few more in Newport Beach.

Just a few more months until she ties the knot to Tarek.

Honestly, like they will be insufferable like during their wedding and all the pictures.

And I feel like this bridal shower is like the kickoff for like the next month of them or a few months of them like thirsting out.

And I feel like, you know, there's so many festivities you could have with a wedding.

There's engagement party, bridal shower, bachelor party, bachelorette party.

Not everyone does all of them.

I didn't have an engagement party.

Heather will not let one event go by unmessed.

No, she's going to go into every club.

Will be at every single one of them.

Like, yes, she's going to find events.

She's going to convert to Judaism so she could have like a

Tish.

Yeah, Tish and a Medeccan and a Henna.

Like, she's just going to have a million parties before she actually gets married.

And you know what?

I feel like Christine Quinn was

on point in her criticism of Tarek and Heather just being like, it's like always something with their publicists, like fake paparazzi and like a million, our cupcake recipe.

Like she was 100% right.

Like that's exactly who Heather is.

100%.

And it's boring.

I agree.

And like Christine is too busy like being fabulous, pushing her child around in a Louis Vuitton stroller to have to time for these events.

Yeah.

I just hope like it's, you know, I feel like whenever we take sides in like, you know, reality TV shows, like we're always on the losing side.

Like, why is Christine the only girl not there?

I don't know.

Maybe she wasn't invited.

No, I know.

That's what I'm saying.

Or maybe she just didn't go, but I hope she doesn't like

this case for the ladies doesn't like just wind up her becoming irrelevant on the show.

Right.

But she could never be irrelevant.

I know she's literally the most interesting to look at.

Yeah.

And now she has this whole new life with this man and their baby and their house.

Like, I just want to know more.

And like, I just love that she settled down so fast.

It's the craziest thing.

Not like, you know, she's not like Heather going out for the most famous, like a simple guy who obviously loves her.

And I just, I think we could all learn a lot from Christine Christine Quinn.

For a number of reasons, we could.

Yeah.

Well,

from one really good reality show to a terrible one.

This is going to be our TV recap segment where we recap for this, hopefully second to last time, but I feel like it'll be a two-part reunion.

The Real Housewives in New York last night was the season finale, thank God.

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Slash toast.

Oh, really?

Yeah, really.

It had to be done.

Really?

You do it to me every day.

Of course, but like literally, like that's an ad.

Like we have to respect the ads.

Yeah, then it's an unit's unbalanced because you're always reading ads.

So then I can never come for you.

And I usually don't.

No, but I literally talk like all the time.

You can make fun of me whenever you want, except the ads.

No, but usually the talking making fun of is from the reading, the assigned reading material.

Oh, I guess that's true.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

For sure.

Okay, fine.

That's fair.

Okay.

I'll allow it.

I have to go my nose.

Will you just tell everyone what happened on the rail houses in New York?

Oh, wow.

Okay.

Yeah.

Sure.

I'm literally still struggling with altitude because I've got that altitude.

I've got that altitude.

So I'm sorry, there's mikas coming down my nose.

Okay.

Give me a minute.

We kicked off the last final and worst episode of Roney with pin the tail on the Dubin and Harry Dubin calls and everyone's like being so

Everyone's being so embarrassing, I would say

Can you guys can you hear her?

Nice.

Okay, good.

So you have to hear what I have to hear.

So it was just like really beyond stupid.

Nothing to say there.

Then the rest of the episode is about how they're gonna, oh, they went to a Greek restaurant and they smashed plates and they talked about what they were letting go of.

They've all been saying the same things that they're gonna let go of for the last 50 years.

Right.

And Sonia's letting go of asset management.

And Leah's in love with her ex.

Who knew?

Plot twist.

Plot twist.

That was weird.

I feel like she was, and she wasn't drunk actually, because she's sober.

Like, where the fuck did that come from?

I don't know.

I mean, I guess we never asked her how she felt about him, but I guess like he, she wanted more from him.

And I guess he like disappointed her in a lot of ways.

Yeah, and I guess she's kind of resigned herself to being just a co-parent until her daughter's old enough to like, you know, be on her own, which is really really sweet.

But I guess it, you know, every once in a while, like she said, it gets to her.

And she really, like, you know, and that is really sad.

Like, she's such like a fabulous, vibrant woman.

She deserves love, but she doesn't think that that's what it should be like right now.

Yeah, I just like can't really care.

Okay, I'm just trying to tell you.

No, like, I'm just

trying my best.

Or compelled by this story at all.

Understood.

I'm just

then, oh, on the pin in the tail of the Dubin, they also all took their shirts off.

I found that to be like really crazy.

No, no.

Talk about like

last-ditch effort.

Like, they think, like, oh, it's not a good episode.

Let me show my titties.

Like, actually, no, we're all good.

We've seen all of your titties a million times.

You know, when you're drunk in Turks and Caikos, that's one thing.

That's fine.

Totally acceptable.

But, like, literally in Ramona's Hampshire's house in the tiny living room with like cameramen everywhere.

Like, the bright lights and just like brave.

It was really, it was shocking to me.

I mean, they all are like stunning and

breasts are lovely.

Wonderful breasts, breasts of plenty.

It wasn't about whether the breasts were worthy or not.

It was just like, what is going on?

No, Charlie.

I think, honestly, they were just trying to keep us abreast.

I felt very much kept abreast.

I really did.

Okay, so then after the Greek restaurant, they come back to Ramona's house and they're all getting dressed up as each other

for the Saturday night.

It's like a really funny premise.

And I thought it should have been funnier.

And but also it's something that could really go south, but it took the other direction.

Yes, it could.

But they made sure to like poke fun at each other, but then have that game where they say nice things about each other, which was smart.

Which was smart smart and sweet.

They chose people who have the most conflict to dress as each other, which was, you know, again, could have been scary, but it all worked out.

Ebony and Luanne dressed as each other.

Brashawn and Sonya dressed as each other.

Dressed the best.

Okay, best dress was Ramona, which dressed as Leah.

And worst dress was Leah, who dressed as Ramona.

Yeah, like, I feel like when you dress up as someone, like, like, the worst things you think about them come out.

And, like, literally, like, Leah cannot get over this blood plasma thing.

Oh, my God.

She can't get over it.

It's over a year old.

So stupid.

And the dress like that was a leah dress that wasn't ramona's we never wear a short dress like that oh my god with her like butt hanging out like never she she never has she never would also ramona doesn't wear makeup what was with her face makeup there was none no and then like the karen wig it was just it was not good it was horrific but leah's costume well ramona's costume as leah with the leopard and the gum and the hair.

It was great.

It was great.

No, she was great.

She committed.

She was being funny.

I mean, she was having so much fun.

She reminded me of me me on Halloween, where you're just like the person, the career takes over.

No, she's looking in the mirror and she's like, so hot.

I want some cock.

Like, she was being funny.

She was really funny, but Leah was a huge disappointment.

The blood plasma, like, I need Leah to get the Q score reports back and find out that nobody cares that Ramona said she donated buzz plasma, but probably was just getting her antibodies tested.

And by the way, like, I, I don't know, I wasn't there at the medical center in Palm Beach, but I'm almost 100% sure that Ramona really, for a while, thought she donated blood plasma, like thought she did something when she actually just got tested for anybody's.

100%.

I think the same thing too.

Yeah.

Because Ramona's not someone who really like lies.

She's not a liar.

She's just like confused.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So

I was not here for it.

And also like just walking around with like an IV drip just like time.

Out of touch.

Out of touch.

It just felt a little out of touch.

I don't know.

Let's talk about out of touch.

When literally Leah was making a speech at the end that like this country could take a page out of their book because they've all spoken about their differences.

Like, no.

no, okay, it was annoying because it came from Leah, but at the end of it, I kind of understood what she was saying.

No, I know, but like, really out of touch.

Like, people should be looking to you guys.

No, no, no, no, no.

Okay, yes, agreed.

No one should be looking at you.

No, but I agree.

They've all worked past their differences and they all have different backgrounds.

And they all have different opinions and they're having the time of their lives.

And so it can be done.

I don't know if the world should be looking at them for guidance, but I thought it was a nice moment for sure.

And I thought she made a nice point.

Again, the world, please do not look at these women for guidance.

I thought that it's so easy to do Countess.

Like, just walk around in Giovanni.

Like, she makes it so easy.

But I thought that

Luanne did a really good job of ebony.

Yeah.

Holding court.

Yeah.

Ebony.

I thought it was good.

And the answers that everyone gave, and Bershawn and Sonia were great.

So funny.

I thought Sonia was great as Bershon.

I feel like Bershawn could have done more as Sonia.

Yeah, I know.

Because

Schunga's never worn that outfit in her life.

No, but I think her jacket was Sonia by Sonia Morgan, which is why Bershawn thought she she like completed the assignment.

Yeah.

It wasn't.

No, she was, it was uncompleted.

So then they all went around the table and answered questions like, as their alter ego, which showed that they all understood each other more than the viewers probably thought.

I know there were six women at the table, but the whole episode just really felt like

there were none of them, like it just felt like the smallest group of housewives and like so insignificant.

And like another trip to Ramona's.

It was just...

It was atrocious.

And honestly, I wish I could offer some insight.

People are like, bring back Bethany and Dorinda but honestly like I don't know if recycling old housewives is the move like I think at some point like the show has to like shed its skin and move on and like

and find real affluent married people like not keep recycling the same people bring Bethany back a third time like would you start fresh maybe

I would keep Ebony

And I have a very soft spot in my heart for Ramona.

And she's funny.

I'm sorry.

Like I know everyone hates her, but like she is fucking funny and she's entertaining.

I would keep, well, that's what the Dumois item said: that, like,

that they're really shaking things up at NBC and they would only keep Ramona and Ebony.

I feel that, like, honestly, because you know what, Sonia, her time has come.

And you know what?

So has Luanne.

Like, I actually think Luanne is in.

Luan would be friendly because NBC owns some of her cabaret.

Fabulous.

Sonia's got to go.

And honestly, like, Leah's not doing what she thinks she's doing.

And also, I just don't think Leah leads an affluent enough life.

I'm sorry.

Like, this is a show about affluent people.

And Ramona, as she works very hard to keep that lifestyle.

Ebony has has that lifestyle.

Like you need people with that lifestyle.

And the thing is that I think makes it really hard in certain cities is like, and I think this is probably what goes on in New York.

Like the actual like really rich married women of New York like do not want to be on TV.

Like they are private.

Their husbands don't want to be on TV.

Their kids don't want to be on TV.

So I think that makes it difficult.

Yeah, but there are people who who would do it.

Yeah.

And even like these ladies, when we first met them, they were those women.

Louis.

Yes, which is why it's so crazy how far they've come.

But like when you think about all the women we've picked up along the way, like none of them have really been like that girl, like that lifestyle.

Like Jules Weinstein, like no.

You know what I mean?

Like, sorry, Cindy Barshop.

Like, no.

Like,

when you think, I just feel like they actually have a hard time finding women who have that lifestyle, who will agree to be on TV.

Yeah.

Because when I think of all the one-hit wonders, people, Kristen Takeman, like who we've picked up along the way, no.

Mm-hmm.

I'm sorry.

I like Heather.

I think I would bring back Heather.

Yeah, but not if Leah was there.

She wouldn't come back.

Leah should not be there.

You think?

She's not it.

But okay, she had one amazing season.

Yeah, one bad.

She was incredible one.

So

she's back at zero.

Okay.

I like Leah.

I feel like maybe, you know, when you do so well in your first season, you really think you can do nothing wrong.

You get like an ego.

And I think maybe she just like misread every situation.

That's possible.

Because she thought there was like no way that she could be wrong.

Yeah.

And maybe this will be like humbling.

Okay.

And then if it's Leah, Ebony, and Ramona, they should each bring on one friend.

Oh, that's interesting.

And then also bring back Tinsley.

I would bring back Tinsley.

Yes.

Yeah.

She wasn't even great when she was.

Like, the most interesting thing about her is that she left.

Right.

And that was like kind of like the first time since I met her on TV that I actually had respect for her.

Yeah, I agree.

So she's like, is that she's going to come crawling back staying on?

Yeah, like, no.

See, the thing is, I don't know what the right

medication for for this problem is.

But it's a problem we're seeing in a lot of franchises because it's the same issue of like aging out of the original.

The shows have been on for so long.

It's very formulaic.

Women who,

when it first started, you didn't know how big it was going to become, like, how your life would change either positively or negatively.

And it was just like a fun adventure.

And there were so many reality shows at the time.

Like, now you know exactly what to expect.

So who's going to come on?

and do anything that's going to paint them in a bad light.

Then you just have boring shit happening.

Right.

But if you do find a person who's willing to do that, it makes a franchise, Jensha.

Like she acted even beyond her case.

Like she acted atrociously.

Yeah.

And it was amazing television.

So there are still people out there.

That's true.

But then for me, like I do get to the point where it's like, I would rather watch boring TV than watch these toxic people.

I know.

It's actually a really fine line.

Yeah.

It's a fine line.

Like Dorinda.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well,

that's that on that.

There's no recap of New York next week, finally, hullaby.

And we'll see how many parts the reunion is.

Yeah, and then we have Beverly Hills on tonight, which always just feels like a reward for a job well done on having watched New York.

Completely.

I also heard Back John Paradise last night was really good.

Really?

Yeah, but I just couldn't watch two more hours of television after the three hours it took me to watch New York.

So maybe I'll watch it.

But I'm glad I skipped a few episodes because it felt like I don't think anything really major happened.

No, and I've just been living like so peacefully in my own mind, knowing that I'm not watching that.

But if I do watch it, I'm happy to recap it for you because it seemed like you liked my recaps.

Like, yeah, no, you didn't.

I just, I don't want you to feel pressured.

Like, I really read a book.

Read a book.

I'm really not into Bachelor in Paradise.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

So she's saying no.

I would rather you explain to me the woman who loved Wallace or whatever that book was.

You know what I mean?

What was that book called?

The Woman Before Wallace.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

Like, I can't really explain how, like, I don't, how much I don't care about Bachelor in Paradise.

And you know what I've realized?

Like, Bachelor in Paradise, in terms of relevancy, is really going down because it used to be like

on TikTok especially like if somebody from Bachelor in Paradise or Bachelor like made a TikTok about while the show was airing like about them like oh a bug flew on my face like whatever it would go viral now I keep seeing really sad contestants like trying to go viral who Demi the only one who's actually doing a like a fair job but she's not even going crazy viral is Tammy because she's like being funny and self-deprecating but like I just and I don't even recognize some of these people I just know that they're on bachelor in paradise because they're like hashtagging it.

And it's like, it's not viral.

Like, it's actually really sad.

That's really sad.

That's how you know, like, less and less people give a shit, especially people on TikTok.

Like, the young generation, like,

they don't care.

Also, TV recap.

I spoke a lot about it on the Patreon episode from last night.

Oh, my God.

So, I don't want to like bore everyone.

Okay, no, but I think you need to double dip.

I watched She's All That, you guys, and it was fucking amazing.

Like, Addison is an absolute mega star.

Like, she, the scenes that she wasn't in were atrocious, and I was like, this movie sucks, but she was

sparkle.

Like, I can't even, she was such a good actress, first of all.

Second of all, she deserves an Oscar.

Like, it was so good.

I loved the element of the influencer.

I thought they did a really good job kind of

explaining and showcasing how kids are these days in high school with social media.

It's totally true.

It was just amazing.

I did not like the kid who played Cameron, her love interest.

And honestly, he was like, the worst fucking attitude of all time.

Like, it's not cool to do photography.

Like, just get a phone like you're taking pictures of strangers like that's really invasive and you're taking pictures of the garbage can yeah and like honestly get a cell phone like it's not cool to like not love like people and cell phones like i just did not like his vibe at all yeah but i thought but addison turned him around yeah and addison was so cute and sweet and i just really feel like she's a nice girl because her character was just like emanating niceness and so it was actually and she's not like such a you know experienced actor so she had to play someone who was kind of similar to her yeah and it was actually like a hard sell that she, you know, had this bet going, that there was like this side of her that was even that ruthless because she's just such a sweetie.

I loved the ending.

I loved the homage they paid to the original movie because her mom was in it.

The principal was the guy from the real world in the original movie.

They both wore red dresses.

There was a dance off at the prom.

It was very subtle but sweet.

And I really loved that they actually cast the mom.

I thought she was great.

And I just loved every minute of it.

Yeah, but even like when they went to the party, the Gatsby-themed party, and he gets, he goes in the pool, that's like when

in the first movie, when you're like, she falls in the pool.

Yeah.

Or they push her in the pool.

I think she, they put, they, whatever.

That girl Taylor pushes her.

Yeah.

And then in Not Another Teen Movie, they also pour bottles of water on her.

Jackie, I literally confuse he's all that with not another teen movie all the fucking time.

Yeah, there's a lot of movies in there that are make it confusing.

Yeah, that they're like doing satire on.

And I'm like, was that the original or the satire?

Yeah.

No, it's Cruel Intentions.

Bring it on.

Yeah.

That's such a good movie.

Such a good movie.

um i'm so glad you watched it and that you liked it and that you had the same opinions of me including um the stylist sabotage oh yeah the wardrobe the the wedge the budget for the wedges was literally astronomical because it was a new pair of like wedges that ramona singer wears in cancun like it's just not a thing like burn all the wedges yeah what did you think about courtney oh my god you know i actually thought she was pretty good like she her role was bigger than anticipated but still very small and i thought that you know she wasn't as cringy.

I saw her act in Dave, and it was really fucking cringy.

And I feel like she took a couple lessons because she was pretty good.

Yeah.

She was believable.

And it was really good.

It's crazy how her, like, you know, influence in the movie, like, she was a big part of the storyline.

Bunny Venom.

Yeah.

Venom Bunny or whatever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So cute.

I loved it.

And I cannot wait to see Addison act in something else.

I know.

It was so good, you guys.

And I have no time for anyone who thinks otherwise.

Same.

But we do have time for our interview with Michael and Lauren Bossick.

It is coming up.

I hope you guys enjoy it.

And we are on their podcast.

I believe that drops tomorrow, but don't quote me on that.

But in the meantime, just enjoy this episode and the interview with Lauren and Michael.

We'll see you soon.

Bye.

Well, welcome back to the toast.

We are so excited to be sitting down with a couple who literally has all my love and respect because I'm going to start this off with a story.

So hello, Lauren.

Hello, Michael.

Welcome to the podcast.

Hello, respect.

Also, welcome, Michael's hair.

Yes.

Like, respect.

We'll see how it goes.

Let me tell you why.

Okay.

So, what was it, a month ago, maybe more?

Jackie was somewhere.

Oh, yeah.

She was out of town.

And instead of taking the week off, I was like, let me do the show with like guest co-hosts.

And I got Taylor Strucker and people who were in town, my friend Brian Kelly, the points guy.

And then I ended it with my husband because people love when Ben comes on the podcast.

And of course, it's easy for me.

We could take a cab together.

And I have a lot of trauma from that one particular episode because, you know, me and Ben were just talking like we usually do.

I didn't really think much of it.

And when I posted the episode, like the backlash was so real.

They were like, you guys did not stop fighting.

You're so mean to Ben.

And I'm like, what?

I'm like, we were just doing our usual thing.

And I vowed seriously to never do a podcast with Ben again, even though I was thinking like of actually starting a separate podcast on Toast News Network with Ben.

Idea, trash.

Like, I will, I have so much trauma.

I will never podcast with Ben again.

And the fact that you guys not only podcast together, own a business together, do literally everything on planet Earth together, like respect together on the daily and still are happily married.

Don't

people think that about us?

We, I work on the skinny confidential and he works on Dear Media and we come together to podcast.

People think we work together all day long.

We don't.

Okay, but to even podcast, I actually heard you say that.

I listened to your episode with Sophia with an F, and I listened to both, and I love that.

Love her.

Yeah, love.

But even the fact that you do a podcast weekly together as man and wife is

admirable.

Three times a month now.

Eight times.

Two episodes a week.

Yeah.

Commendable.

But I have a nervous breakdown like at least three times a month.

Last night we went to Scalinatelli.

I like blacked out basically and just like laid into him for like two hours.

Lauren holds all her rage for like two months.

That's healthy.

And then we go out to what I think will be a romantic, nice dinner.

It's a romantic restaurant.

Yes.

And it's small in there and it's quiet.

I'm not too.

People are like, what is this wife doing here?

I have a hot tip for anyone who wants to just like let it out.

Go to a small intimate restaurant.

So if the guy tries to talk back,

you can say, just bitch at him.

And he's embarrassed.

Because if he says anything, it's going to look like you're fighting.

Yeah, so you can just let it all out, unleash all your rage.

And if he says anything, he's too embarrassed in front of you.

Yeah, we live in a very sexist society.

Yeah, yeah.

Like, I, my question for you is: how do you deal with people commenting on the dynamics of your relationship?

Because honestly, not a lot offends me, but like, my marriage is very personal to me.

And it bothered me a lot that people were commenting, like, you're being mean.

Like, you guys don't stop bickering.

Like, shut up.

We have a great marriage.

Like, that, that's one thing.

Like, if you come at me for, like, that actually gets me.

It hurts me.

Like, how does that not bother you?

I don't read my own press clippings so what I mean by that is I try not to read all the positive because that I think feeds my ego and I try to not read the negative and that comes with a long time of doing this I've been blogging for 13 years so

It's very easy to get wrapped up in yourself and thinking, oh, you're so great.

And it's very easy to get into the negative reviews.

So true.

So I just feel like I love connecting with my community.

I DM, I voice note all the time.

Like if people DM me, I'll try to voice note.

But I really try not to get stuck in the reviews.

And when someone's commenting on my marriage, I think the unlock is that

they don't know every single part of my marriage.

They see a piece of my marriage.

So if they want to comment, like that's their prerogative.

Right.

Also, like for people who comment that like you're bickering and you're married, like then they're clearly not married because that's just how that's what being married is.

Or they haven't been married long.

Because like that's, you get into like a rhythm like whatever

that's not healthy bickering turns me on

it makes me hot like what do i want to sit with like mr boring that doesn't have a personality like throw me the ball back yeah yeah there's two things i don't comment on with people's personal life their relationship or their parenting right because i think it's so different for everybody and what people could maybe see lauren and i and listen we get heated sometimes and like she is a very outspoken aggressive loud woman i mean that with respect

what do you love about her though and like that's what i fell in love with personally like that's like what gets me going, right?

Like, that's what I was attracted to.

And I think people see that, like, I would never be like that with my husband.

And maybe their husband wouldn't like it if they were.

But for us, like, that's, I mean, we've been together since, you know, we were 20 years old, 21 years old.

We met when we were 12.

Like, clearly it works for us.

But I would never say this formula would work for anyone else.

And I also tell everybody, like, please, please do not work with your significant other unless you're both 100% on the same page, because it is very fucking hard.

Yeah, I guess the way we feel about you guys working together, like, we would never do that, is the way people feel about working with their sisters.

When it's like, how the fuck would you literally work with anyone but your sister?

Uh-huh.

That is a very, very self-aware thing, what you just said.

Thank you for saying that.

I always try and be self-aware.

That's like the one thing I want people to describe me as.

Self-aware is such a sexy word.

And you know what's not sexy?

Not being self-aware.

That's the worst thing you could be.

Yeah, I agree.

I totally agree.

I feel like Jaggie and I talked about you guys a lot during quarantine because you moved.

Like you did what everyone should have done.

A lot of people moved in 2020, 2020, but I don't think any move hit me like yours did.

Like where just I would say my complete another jealousy just took over.

So did you guys move because of COVID?

Were you planning to move before the pandemic ever?

And why, Austin?

This is what happened, and you might be experiencing this.

I got pregnant.

And when I got pregnant, you get super in tune and super intuitive.

And I remember walking down the street and in LA, there's like construction going on and there's a lot of homeless.

homeless like there's a there's a problem there and it's a lot of sounds ambulances it's it's a lot of cortisol it's triggering it's triggering it's triggering and I was thinking I'm like

do I want to be walking a stroller down the street and the answer is no I mean I remember literally I stepped on like not like with bare feet but with my shoe a heroin needle like outside our house like it was it just was a lot of I'm gonna say cortisol where we lived listen I'm not talking about all of LA talking about where we lived

so I started to crave more nature more sanctuary more of a family home that my daughter could grow up in and also it's it's what you can get in LA compared to Austin it's like so crazy crazy and so he recommended Austin and the second I went there I was like this is it you know a lot of people in California are gonna get really pissed at me like obviously we were born and raised San Diego which and what I think what people don't realize about California is it's so big and there's so many different pockets right there's like San Diego then there's Orange County then there's Los Angeles then you get up to Nor Cal and you have Napa and you have all these places San Francisco and all of these places are like vastly different because it's it's a massive state

and so I don't want to just shit on all of California people get like mad at me but like LA is a fucking shit show it's not and it it's something died this year in LA and it's not coming back for a long time people are gonna be so mad at me like you're talking to somebody who's like born and bred lived in California forever I mean we are the exact same way but about New York born and bred we've lived here forever something died here you You know, we're like, at least for me, like a self-hating New Yorker at this point.

I think New York, it's in some ways, you know, it's come back and there's life in certain areas, but in so many ways, it's like not going to be the same for a very long time.

When we moved to L.A., we went, like I say, briefcase mentality.

We didn't get caught up in like the nightlife, going out, social life.

It was there.

We're

on your media.

But like, I never thought, like, hey, I'm going to, I can't wait to raise a family here.

And then honestly, like, with COVID and the riots, like, at one point, I had to debate, and listen, this is, again, not political, but it's just true.

I had to debate, like, do I go and help our sister who's down the street on, you know, Melrose with a cop car flipped over and burning?

Or do I stay with my wife and kid with helicopters flying around?

I'm like, I got to have a one-year-old.

Like, why do I want this?

And personally, like, growing up, I feel like I've always been called to a place like Texas.

My favorite authors were Larry McMurtry and Cormac McCarthy.

And I read all these Western books.

And like, my dad was

out

back that way in the Midwest.

And like, just following these stories.

And I feel like I just, like, as soon as I got to text I'm like oh my soul and this sounds weird is like alive again and I felt happy you're speaking you're speaking like our language like I was just like why like this is like what happiness is to me and it's in the middle and it's between and I just feel like it's dead quiet when you sleep there's not I want you to actually imagine this there is not one sound besides the bugs chirping.

Here's the other thing.

It is like

gorgeous.

It's gorgeous.

We're in a red state, but in a blue progressive city, which kind of gives a nice melting pot of different perspectives and different people.

When I first got there, there, it's so weird.

You got in the neighborhood and like people wave to you and say hello.

Michael, Michael, hold on.

This is Michael.

Michael's with his coffee.

He's like, Morning.

This motherfucker goes around the street.

I'm watching, morning.

It's so welcoming.

It's polite.

People are happy.

Great music scene, great food scene.

Like, there's culture there.

Like, I just felt like this is where I want to raise a family.

Also, this is so nuts.

In LA, the baby, when we stay there, will not go outside for a week.

Yeah.

Like, she just will stay inside.

And here, she, this is so crazy.

Jackie's gonna like is Jackie here with you?

She is.

She's here.

She's she's grounding.

Like she'll go outside and put her feet on the grass and she touches trees.

And it's, I know this sounds so crazy.

Look it up.

It's called earthing and grounding.

It's so good for you to touch the earth every morning.

And I know this.

Yeah, by the way, I believe that for sure.

Yeah.

I know that sounds like it.

Well, here's the sacrifices.

I mean, if you live in the big, let's say like San Francisco, LA, New York, Chicago, like bigger cities in the country, like, okay, I will pay higher cost of living.

I'll be in a smaller space.

I'll be on top because there's ease of access, there's great restaurants, there's business opportunities, all these things.

Yeah, I'm going to pay more in tax, all these things.

All those are factors, but you're willing to kind of like make sacrifices because the opportunities exist to do different things.

You start taking those opportunities away.

You start making it dangerous or too expensive or whatever.

Restaurants go out of business.

Yeah, you're like,

you take the fun out of it.

You're like, why the fuck am I doing this?

Like, just go to a place where you can enjoy life a little more.

I feel like every New Yorker has that moment where they're like, like, chasing a cockroach out of their apartment or like hunting down a mouse.

And they're looking around at their tiny, shitty apartment.

And they're like, why do I live here?

And that feeling comes and goes.

But I feel like during COVID, it was really hard to ignore that feeling.

Because, you know, in New York, you live in tiny, ugly, disgusting apartments, but there's so much life outside that you never really even notice because your apartment, you're only there, you know, an hour a day.

Yeah.

We never had time to sit and self-reflect because everything's go, go, go.

And with COVID, you had to take a really honest look at yourself.

And everyone just fled.

yeah everyone just fled like the cockroach that's flubbing

that won't fling yeah I also like do you guys know your human design no what I'm gonna send you the link you got to get your human design

we love doing like we love taking personality tests like on your tests I bet your community I bet you a lot of them know the human design what does it tell you it tells you like what kind of energetic I'm probably flubbing this person that you are so my human design is a reflector the energy that someone gives me I reflect back to them And I think with LA.

I'm a vortex.

I just steal everyone's energy.

Is that

there's like a manifestor generator?

Like, I bet that's why I take this.

I have projectors.

Do you guys know your Enneagrams?

No, I got to do it.

Do you know?

Every podcaster should know their Enneagrams.

What else do you do on December?

That's disgraceful that we don't know our Engrams.

I'm an Enneagram one, so that's like type A.

But I'm not, but sure.

And she's Enagram three, which is like people pleaser.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hold on.

You don't think you're type A.

No, I think it's so.

But we talk

many respects, like I am.

And even in the things that we talked about, and there's so many things I'm like extremely like meticulous about, but I'm also like the laziest bitch alive.

Like I literally packages an empire.

Packages sit in my foyer for like days until there's eight.

And I'm like, okay, I'll open them all at once.

Well, you got to delete crazy.

You got to hire an assistant that helps you open them.

Oh, no, but like, why can't I open my packages when they come?

I don't know.

Maybe because you don't want to ruin your nails.

No, but like, it's, it's really crazy how like I don't do things things like when I need to do them with emails or just like I don't get back to people like and that's not type A personality.

But you focused your energy towards building what you want to build.

Like you're pushing the boulder up your empire, not worried about what other people are.

Type A is you're doing what you want to do, I think.

That's my definition of it.

Like and you know, obviously you can be respectful in that process, but like you're basically waking up being like, I'm not going to be able to do that.

You're incredible my way or the highway.

And you don't think you're type A.

I've never seen the planet.

I know what I'm saying.

I should have seen the way that I planned it.

Like I was so indecisive.

I never like had a vision about what I wanted it to be.

So when I had to make these decisions, I was like, that one, like, whatever.

It doesn't really matter.

They're both pretty.

They'll both be fine.

Like, everyone listening not thinks she had the craziest, coolest, most spectacular fucking wedding ever.

No, I totally agree, but like, that was a shock to me when that happened because of the planning process.

It was like...

It was a cluster fuck.

Like, and I was not, I didn't have, you know, like printouts and spreadsheets.

Like, I would show up to everything with like a fanny pack.

Like, what are we doing, guys?

Like, what's on deck for today?

So I feel like I present myself as very type A, but on the inside, like, I'm kind of chaotic.

Totally.

You know, I feel like when it comes to like outward presentation, like, I want to be perceived as like having it together.

You look like you have it together.

Like, your hair, the way, like, how you're dressed, every single time I've ever seen you, like, yeah.

I get, yeah, but like, I still like this, like, I'm not putting on.

So, some, I don't, I confuse myself.

Are you Gemini?

No, I'm Scorpio.

Oh, another confusing thing.

I'm like, I've talked about this.

Actually, I was about to say, I'm like not like a passionate person, but it just depends on the subject.

Yeah, sure, sure.

Yeah.

I'm like a cancer to a T.

It's like you, cancers are like mean to everyone, and then if someone's mean to them, they like cry.

Like, that's me.

You know, dishing it, but not taking it.

That's me to a T.

I love it.

Squirrels are like crazy.

Gemini.

Oh, that's like the nuts one, right?

Yeah.

Michael never knows what he's going to get.

Oh, like

twins, like Two Face, right?

Like last night at dinner.

Right, right, right.

You know, I'll see who I got today.

You know, life is always an adventure.

Life is always an adventure.

You also just recently, was it your second book?

Yeah.

I put out my second book.

Get the fuck out of the way.

I wish you guys were in it.

So I wanted to be in.

I don't know that.

We don't have enough skincare.

Like, we're going to talk about skincare in a little bit.

And like, you're going to be sitting on the side.

No, I'm going to attach you because there's certain things I'm looking at on your faces.

No, it's no.

Yes.

In good or bad ways.

Good.

Oh, good, good, good.

No, no, no.

Good.

Hold on.

Like, I want to know what your eyebrow filler in there is.

I want to know what your mascara is.

No, but like.

Claude has a glow.

I don't buy it that you guys do nothing.

No, we do such.

I do.

I have like a lotion that I use every night, but like

what I do is not nearly involved enough to be like interesting for a book.

Because

I read through all the questions.

I was like, I don't have the answers.

I read through all the questions too.

And like, I, I honestly, like, if I'm going to be like really honest with my friends here, like, I forgot to respond.

Okay, let me tell you something, though.

The fat Jew was in it, and he was brutally honest.

Like, like, he actually was like, What's what the fuck is a toner?

Like, he was so, so honest.

What the fuck is a toner?

A toner is something that tightens and shrinks your pores it's like what point in the night do you do it you can after moisture after you wash your face okay do you do it every night sometimes no i don't do it every night i'm not i sometimes sleep in my makeup i'm not like trying to pretend like things are perfect okay good i'm actually incredibly chaotic yeah well i just want to say like i'm really sorry i never responded because i did want to meet your book but like i i genuinely forgot no no no honestly i think though that people that weren't in the skincare world

like they didn't like you said they didn't which is fine like i'll share the i use like a product before I put on my makeup and then after I shower I put on a face cream that I like don't tell anyone cuz we're gonna talk about we're gonna talk about

like the just my our routines aren't in depth enough and when it comes to the glow like it's makeup I know what to do when it comes to the glow it's sweat No, it's looking like the glow is looking good.

No like people always say like that my skin like is so like glowy and this and that like you should see me before I put my makeup on like it's rosacea.

It's freckles.

It's like and especially now like being pregnant It's it's freaky and it's nothing like this but we do have relatively good skin, and people do always ask us, like, routines.

And I have, like, a small routine, it's nothing crazy.

But at the end of the day, and like, no one wants to hear this answer, like, we both have good skin because we really, it's just in our jeans.

Like, for so long, I didn't even wash my face.

Like, I literally used to take my makeup off and go to sleep, like, not even use a cleanser.

Like, and I never even got pimples.

Like, it's at some point, like, it's just genetics.

And, like, we just have good, like, skin and hair in our jeans.

Do your husbands do a routine?

Yeah, my husband uses Jack Black stuff.

He likes that brand, like the blue bottles.

Jack Black, like the separate.

Oh.

But the brand is just called Jack Black.

When I first met Michael, he was using old spice shower gel, and I had to really

come in and

that was bad.

I was like, whoa, now he has a fucking 10-step.

Oh, Ben has literally a zero, a negative four-step.

Well, maybe we can like get Ben drunk off Spritz and give him a Dr.

Dennis vitamin C.

But like, he'd be down, but, like, he can't even remember to like take his wallet with him before he leaves the house.

Like, how's he gonna remember to do a four-step routine before bed?

I forgot my wallet, too.

He sounds like me.

Yeah, no, he's just very fine.

And he also has good skin, so

he's like, probably if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

And he once said to us, he's like, you guys do all this stuff, and like you have crazy, like, pimples and stuff.

He was like, and I don't do anything.

And my rationale is like, well, I have to wear this much makeup every single day.

And like, that fucks with your.

And then you have to do something to like offset the consequences of that, like while you're sleeping at night.

Like, there's that meme that exists, it's on the internet, and it's like that troll, and it says like a girl after a 10-step routine.

People get mad at me.

Yeah.

And then there's like a glowing guy, and it's a guy that uses the same soap that he washes balls with.

Like, Literally.

Literally true.

Here's a tip.

I've noticed a lot of people use the same towel that their husband wiped their balls with on their face after they cleanse it.

You cannot use a ball sack towel on your face.

I actually did learn that from you.

I have like a now a separate towel that just stays by my sink that doesn't get used like as a towel from the shower.

It's just a face towel.

You can't wipe your butthole and then put it on your face.

Nobody expects it.

That's what we've been doing.

My husband and I have separate towels, separate colors.

That's like, that's a separate colors.

Yeah.

Yeah, they don't, they're not cohesive looking at all.

Like, he's like his towels from still when he was a bachelor, and I just got like light blue ones I like.

But it's a little bit more.

Yeah, sometimes when water makes me mad, I sneak in the bathroom and just wipe my balls with every towel I take.

I use baby washcloths on my side.

Dude, what is going on with my skin?

I'm breaking out.

I'm like, I have no idea.

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

The weather here is a little difficult on the skin.

I'm a little puffy.

I've got some zits going on, hyperpigmentation.

Have you noticed like a difference in your skin since moving to the country?

I feel like it's like the air would be so good for your skin.

Everything's just more relaxing.

Yeah.

And obviously, there's things with, I'm sure, every city that I'm not saying it's perfect, but it's very idyllic.

It's very, um, it's very pretty to wake up and take a walk and be able to do even like a conference call, like outside and walk around and with the baby.

So, how long before you moved were you planning on moving?

Like, we literally like started talking about it, went out in November, like, during the time of election.

I saw the house and I looked at them and I go, go kill the tiger.

Oh my gosh.

Put it offering that day.

Never really knew.

It's so decisive.

Like we've been, we've been talking about like literally making an appointment at the dentist for like three years.

Like, you know, I think it was like Lauren and I.

But also with the kid, like, you're on it.

There's a time, like, soon she's going to realize like she doesn't leave her house.

True, Jacob Tremblight in room.

Yeah, I think like Lauren and I are the,

like, we're not, we don't need to know the next 10 years of our life.

We'd like to know where we're going a little bit, but we're also like, hey, let's take an adventure.

Like, let's see.

And if it doesn't, I don't want to do something else.

I don't want to live in the same house my whole entire life.

I want to live a spontaneous life.

Right now I live in Austin.

Who knows?

I could live, you know, in Florida.

I could live.

I want to be

spontaneous and

fly by the seat of my pants.

Yeah.

How has moving, now that you've moved, like, how has it affected your relationship?

Like, was it everything that you thought it was going to be?

Are there like challenges that you didn't foresee?

I think it's, I think, I don't want to speak for you, but I think we're in a better place now.

During the first move, when it was back and forth, LA with a kid and that, like it was chaotic.

You're like, oh my God, did we make the right decision?

But now that we have our roots in one place and we can, like, we'll do this.

We'll come to New York.

We'll work, work, work.

We'll go to LA, work, work, work.

After this, we're going to Texas and we're just like, we're just going to be at home with our family, like

living, right?

And so I think in a lot of ways, it made us closer because you do this thing together where you up and leave your entire family, your entire city.

It's not familiar.

You only have each other.

Yeah.

But, you know, I'm not going to say it's for everybody and it's super easy.

Like, I'm not a big going-out, networking

party type person.

As I've gotten older, like I just love a leisurely lunch.

Like a long leisurely lunch or like a 6 p.m.

dinner.

I like to be in bed, if I'm being honest, at like max 9 o'clock.

I think a common misconception

Lauren and I is that we're like these really social people that are out and about.

I feel like that's the vibe I get too.

But we're not, right?

Like and it's very limited.

What I tell people doing, we do the show eight times a month and we're having these conversations all the time.

And as you guys know, like this is a lot of interacting, a lot of paying attention, a lot of social.

It's a lot out of your like soul.

So then like you lose so much of yourself.

Then yeah, and then people after all of it, like, hey, do you want to go to a dinner and like do small time?

Like, I just did all of these all weeks and I want to go home with my family and like read a book and chill out and watch it.

Four podcasts today.

And I was trying to explain it.

I was trying to say like it's like going to dinner for an hour with four different people sober.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Isn't that how it is?

Yeah, but you know what's so funny?

After, whenever we're podcasting with someone, like most most people, I'm like, we need to get dinner after this.

Like, there's so much, we need to like.

Well, there's certain people holding.

Of course.

Like, there's certain, like, yes, of course.

There's some guests that you like have a connection with.

Like, we talked about this offline.

Taylor Strucker is like such a

energy.

You guys have great energy.

But it's not everyone that you want to get dinner with.

Yeah.

And also, usually when we do guest segments, like it's.

15, 20 minutes, like, but you guys are doing like an hour.

And do you have guests mostly every episode?

We have guests, I would say 80%.

Some are solos.

I like doing a solo episode.

So, of course, you're not going to like everyone that you meet.

But we met some real fucking duds.

Yeah, of course.

And so, if we have someone on the show, like, we usually say no to most guests.

So, if someone's coming on, it's like, we really want to talk to them.

And usually, like, they meet our expectations.

Who's the best guest you've ever had?

Like, who you just, you want to just keep having on?

You think that they're just dynamic charisma?

The majority of our guests, like, we've met before, like, we really enjoy.

And sometimes, you know, there's a lot of, but the majority is like, you've gone through and be like, I really want to talk to this person ahead of time.

Who's your best guest?

Honestly, like, we just had Kevin O'Leary on the show and he was

everything.

He gave us a costume.

He did a wine tasting for his O'Leary wines.

He wanted to talk about everything.

Cancel culture, politics.

Like he was literally, and he just, it was, we usually do like 20 minutes with guests.

He just sat and talked and talked.

He made it so easy.

He was everything.

That's a really good answer.

I totally agree.

Oh my God, I have to listen to that.

And now we've had three sharks on the show.

Barbara, Damon, and Kevin.

Kevin, yeah.

And you loved them all.

Barbara was, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, a nut.

Like, she was just all over the place.

She's like exactly who she is on TV, but like 10 times more energized.

She was really cool.

And Damon is just smart.

Like, I just wanted to like sit him down and ask him questions like, how do I grow my business?

I bet they would give you answers.

You guys should go on Shark Tank.

I feel like you'd be perfect.

Back in the day, we would always like think of our business.

Like everything we know about business is from Shark Tank.

truly

and we used to always think of our business of how it like look would present on shark tank and there were a few times we would talk about on the show where it's like should we go on Shark Tank?

Um now like no we probably wouldn't but that's definitely like really influenced how we do business.

How we do business 100%.

I love how you guys are so much about pop culture and and using it like as leverage and to your advantage.

In your book I feel like you talked about that a lot how you couldn't kind of find out what you wanted to do and then you realized what you wanted to do was pop culture.

You love watching TV.

I mean, it's you've made a business out of it.

Yeah, and me and Jackie talk about this a lot.

I feel like one of the, really like our, a big advantage we have when it comes to the podcasting space is like, you know, everyone has a podcast now and like there's a big reality show and the star comes out of it and everyone goes and does all the podcasts.

Me and Jackie, like, especially Jackie, like, because she has a better memory than me, we have been watching reality TV, been engaging in celebrity culture.

We've been on social media since we were kids.

But you guys are practitioners.

We know everything.

And like, and that's just a natural part of who we are.

That's why we got into this line of business.

And I really feel like that's a huge benefit benefit for us when it comes to recapping because it's a natural thing.

Like if we're sitting on our couch, we're talking about Real Housewives of New York.

So why don't we just record it?

And I feel like the community that you guys have cultivated too, they are also like the same kind of way.

Like this is such a nice outlet for someone who loves to watch all these things.

Right.

Whereas I feel like at most times it's like a negative.

Like you watch so much reality TV.

It's like my guilty pleasure.

It's trash.

Like, no, no, it's an art.

It's

perspective.

It is, but sometimes it's trash.

I

just had on the show who was literally just saying this and like talking about like, it is a performance.

It is an art.

You have to bring it.

We had Spencer Pratt on.

Perfect example.

He's been on your show.

I've listened.

Yes.

And he was talking.

He's like, listen, not to Bashley Hills, but he's like, people aren't fucking bringing it.

He's like, they need to bring it.

He's like, season two.

He's like, this.

And he really gave this whole history of his entire experience in the world of reality TV.

And he's been there for forever, right?

And I'm excited for it to come out because it's a really, for me, it was extremely interesting to talk to him and be like, oh, why do some shows work and some don't?

Why do some casts work and some other casts don't?

And he was like, listen, he's like, people need to fucking bring it when they go on these shows because it is a form of entertainment and art.

I think he's a real,

like, real, true blue reality star.

He gets a lot of fun.

I mean, he is loose.

He is out there and he's loose right now.

Yeah.

And he's a perfect example of it.

Like,

it's not.

It's a performance.

Right.

And it's art and it should be treated as such.

And at the morning toast, like, we're not going to call it your guilty pleasure.

Like, it's just something good to watch.

Like, you know what else is good?

We didn't talk about this on our show.

Siesta Key.

Yes.

Love.

Oh, my God.

It gets better and better.

I'm so invested.

The fact that Sam and Juliet are broken up.

I feel so upset.

They broke up in real life.

Yeah, they broke up a few weeks ago, and then he's been like posting with another girl and now she's in Paris.

And it's like, I don't think they're getting back together.

And I'm just coming to terms with it.

Hold on.

Is this for the show?

Or you really think they broke up?

It didn't even happen on the show.

It happened like on social media.

I didn't see, I know, I didn't see it on the show, but maybe are they trying to tease the next season?

I don't think so.

She's my favorite.

She's my favorite.

I love her.

My only issue, like, I love her so much.

So my only issue with her on the show is like, whenever she's on top, she always fucking ruins it.

Like, she doesn't know how to, she always is like coming back from being like the underdog, or like, everybody's mad at her, and she has to, like, you know, crawl back and like say all her apologies.

And then she gets back and she, like, doesn't know how to be on top with grace, you know?

And what do you mean?

Like, she doesn't know how to handle like, like,

winning.

Yeah, you know, like, her bathing suit line, which she's done, is pretty and pretty.

Oh my god, I know.

I got one.

It was so cute.

Yeah, but I got it, like, when I was like turning pregnant.

So, like, I gave it to my little sister for a little bit.

But it was so cute and it was such good quality, and it came really quickly.

Yeah, I like how I like what she's done.

But like, the beginning of the season, like, she's with Sam, and like, you know, Kelsey is like apologizing so profusely because Kelsey fucked up big time, and like, she has so many friends, everybody loves her, and like, she's the narrator of the show.

And, like, she goes and hits Kelsey, and it's like, you have so much to lose.

What are you doing?

But maybe it makes better reality television.

Yeah, I think she probably bears the brunt of like most of that, like, the burden of making the she is the main character, and she has been for a while, and she has to get drunk and do crazy things.

And that I imagine that takes a toll on you.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

It's it's a strain suck of energy.

She said it on the reunion.

She did.

Oh, my God.

I I thought that was so telling.

Yeah.

When she was like, it's hard being on reality TV and everyone's like tiny violins.

But I think she was trying to say something.

What Spencer was saying, he's like, even some of the, like, if you think about the villains and the people that are like out there, he's like, some of them should even just be paid more than the regular cast because they're the ones that like create the environment for the chaos to ensue.

Yeah.

And so like people will look at Spencer and be like, this guy's the villain.

But without, like, imagine the Hills without him this season, right?

Like, what do they do?

And they're just like, hey, let's go to lunch and let's go to dinner.

Right, because also at this point, like, it's pretty formulaic, and everybody, like, knows, like, if you can come off well, and people like you,

you can have a lot of success.

But, like, you know, if you're the villain or the overt villain, like, you're not going to be that person.

So, like, it's a fine line of like being playing it safe, but being not boring and being well-liked.

And only few people really are able to accomplish all these things.

What's like a Jax Taylor or

what's the other thing?

James, like,

you can't duplicate.

Yeah, yeah.

I know he gets so much shit.

I'm sorry.

He's amazing.

He's perfect TV.

He's hilarious.

He can't look away.

He can't look away.

And then James Kennedy comes in.

It's like these two people.

It's like, how do you turn away from that?

I'm actually really excited for Vanderpump this season.

Really?

Yeah, I am.

Why?

What do you know?

Well, I just think that we're going to be pleasantly surprised about the dynamics of what goes on.

And I think if you're getting scared, don't be.

I'm definitely scared.

I'm excited too because it's been so long.

Now I miss them.

I love Lala.

Absolutely.

Me too.

I just can't.

I could just watch on my screen forever.

You know who I like love so much?

And I have a crush on him.

And I told him in front of Lala.

Tom Shorts.

Randall.

Randall.

He,

like, I get it.

He is so funny.

He loves her so much.

He just came on our podcast and he was crying on the podcast about how much her alcohol addiction affected him.

And he's so real and refreshing to me.

Did you read her book?

Yes.

Oh, my God.

It's so good.

I liked her book a lot.

I liked her book a lot.

It was like really easy reading, but like also went below the surface of and like talking about like the alcohol and the stuff that like she had done did to Randall that I think like none of us knew there was like some really crazy

toothbrush.

He just came on and like he obviously was like crying a little bit and like it really hurt him.

Right.

Yeah.

And you could see like when like that's a real relationship.

Like it wasn't like a TV thing.

No.

They're there that's a ride or die couple.

Yeah.

I know.

I also just feel like if the show doesn't end up this season of Van April Rolls being what it needs to be, like Lala really needs to elevate and get on Beverly Hills Housewives.

Yes.

Like, she's honestly too good for this group.

Oh, my God.

I could totally get it.

Like, they're living in tiny apartments, like, and she's literally the queen of Beverly Hills.

Wait, why don't you guys go on

Real Housewives in New York?

You know, it was always like a goal of mine.

That's why I got married.

But now none of the housewives are married, so the joke's on me.

But also, I had been reached out to once by a casting person asking if I knew anyone.

And I'm like, yeah, me.

And then I never heard from them.

And then I never heard from them.

I would love to mix you into the crowd.

Like, I think forever that was the dream, but now when we think about reality TV, like we would never do it.

Yeah.

That's what Michael and I said, too.

Honestly, there's not nearly enough money in it for like how embarrassing it is.

Well, the guys never end up well on those things anyways.

The husbands, on the housewives.

Like, name a husband that's ended up well.

Also, like, why, like, hang the husband out to, like, you know, like, he needs to be kept in the cupboard.

Yeah.

Or they're like, either the husband comes off like so bad, or it's like, you come off bad in the way that you treat your husband.

That's literally my cross to to bear, okay?

But you know, like, I also think, like, why at this stage, right?

Like, I think there's different stages, but at this stage, both with what you've built, kind of with what we built, like, I control these environments.

You control the environment.

Yeah, I need it.

Yeah, there's not, like, you honestly could, there's not a dollar amount that you could, like, I'm like, I have a good environment now that I don't have to worry about some guy going and like showing me like off-mic, like doing something weird.

I just don't want, I don't need to deal with that.

It's not worth it.

And I think if, like, if there was a time, it would be like when we were still building our business.

Yeah.

And we needed it.

And you take risks.

but now you just have like too much to lose.

And also, with all due respect to everybody who does, because I do partake and do watch, and I'm like, obviously, huge fans, real husband, but I don't want

maybe this because I'm a dad now.

I don't want people coming up to my daughter and be like, oh, your dad is that reality guy.

And I'm not saying there's anything like that.

Don't cry.

I'm just saying, like, yeah, I won't cry again.

Every time he talks about the baby,

I just think that, like, there's other things I would like to be known as in her eyes.

Yeah.

Right.

And like, not have people put a stamp of like, yeah, or that, that, or just say, like, hey, like, he has to be this thing.

Like,

because I'm picked up for the baby.

I have a name that I really like.

Zach really isn't crazy about it, so I don't know how that's going to be.

No one cares what they think.

I know what great you are.

He really cares.

He thinks this is equal decisions.

I mean,

I don't know how I could really just.

I need to learn from you.

You can't manipulate it.

How to just scoop and make it seem like it's his idea.

Yeah, that's not true.

We like both came to the, like, there were some names that got scrapped that we both couldn't agree on.

What were they?

Or are you?

That's one that

we scrapped.

Shit.

What's one we scrapped?

I'm trying to think.

I don't think there was a lot of different names that we had for Zaza.

Zaza was always Zaza.

I mean, there was more like just traditional, I think, like more traditional names.

Like just conversation of names that he shut down.

Like one, I said prune.

Yeah, I was like, oh,

oh, man, I used to epune that I was constipated as a kid.

No, prune.

There was another.

Prune was a king.

One because I feel like it's like.

Claude is looking at me.

I shut down.

I'm so glad.

I shut down.

It's kind of cute.

I shut down all items.

She doesn't like it.

I think she's not talking about it.

All items.

All items from her.

I think that's good.

Yeah.

I like a super unique name that's one or two syllables because I like it to be easy for consumers to pronounce.

There's nothing worse when you don't know if someone's name is like 20, like you don't know how to say it.

Do you know what I'm talking about?

Have you ever heard a name like that that you just don't know how to say?

Yeah.

I wanted it like, what if she wants to launch her own brand?

Of course.

Like, no, no, she's an icon like she's born an icon

like I wanted a new name that no one was using but easy to pronounce you guys watch friends accomplished friends no I was more of a Seinfeld person, okay because they're when Rachel and Ross have a baby There's this episode It's actually the funniest episode of television ever and you guys are Rachel and Ross like Rachel wants weird names like Sandrine

and Ross just wants like normal names like Darwin and like James and it's literally the funniest episode and they land on the name Ruth because it's a family name and at the end of the episode when they finally name on it they're like okay, we'll have ourselves a little baby Ruth.

Oh.

And then

they never named the kid Ruth because it's the candy bar.

But they had the baby, right?

Baby Ruth.

Baby Ruth.

Oh, baby Ruth.

It's a candy bar.

I got it.

So I got after this whole episode, they finally land on a name and then they're like, baby Ruth.

I need to watch Friends in Seinfeld.

Lauren's extremely flamboyant.

You don't need to watch Friends.

Oh, you do.

Sometimes it needs some editing, in my opinion.

Like, she's so, like, I'm like, we are not going with Prune.

I will literally.

Prune is cute.

If someone listening names their baby Prune, will you tag me in it?

Prune is a cute name.

Can I say it's kind of growing growing on me?

Thank you.

It's growing on me.

Prune is, it's chic.

I know, but like, I just think naming your kid after food is just a slip.

I'm not naming it after food.

Are you kidding?

I'm naming it because the Olson twins, when they pose for a picture, say prune to suck their buckles in.

Right.

That's all I was saying intentionally.

Prune.

Yes.

Wow.

I don't know.

I kind of turned around on that.

No, no, no.

I see where you're coming from.

Anyways, we have a lot of conversations.

Prunio.

Prunio.

Prunio.

Oh, yeah.

So we are having a boy, which, you know.

Wait, I didn't know that.

Oh, yeah.

You announced boy?

I did.

Interesting.

Our Patreon blog.

I just came out with it.

I was like, because I figured at some point I would, like, be talking about the baby, and I would just, like, spill it anyway.

So I just decided, let's put it all out there.

So, but, but, like, boy, girl names are just more fun to think about.

Maybe because I would agree with that.

So it's definitely, and we didn't start thinking about names until we knew the gender.

Cause I was like, I don't want to like get excited about a name if that's not what it's going to be.

So

it's.

Don't name your son prune.

I will not.

No, no.

I'm more of like a classic name.

Like I want a name that was around 100 years ago and will be around 100 years from now.

You need a name that you can call.

So when you pick your name, like let's say you're going to name like your kid prune.

Prune.

Prune.

Dinner's ready.

Like you need to like use it in context or like,

like, oh no, prune pooped.

No, I feel that because, like, honestly, in our house, Olivia and Claudia are very similar.

So, like, if you missed, if someone was being called down for dinner, you didn't know if it was Olivia or Claudia because the EA at the end was like making it confusing.

Your mom didn't know what to say.

But, why aren't you guys all having dinner at the same time?

Okay, no, for me, it was like, Claudia, you got a zero on your test.

Like, you're in trouble.

Like, you know what I mean?

Again, there was no confusion about who it was.

Yeah, of course, Olivia did not get it.

Fine, fuck.

Okay.

That's a fair point.

You have to use your name, though, in sentences.

You can't just name the name.

That's like a really good point.

That's a good tip.

Start walking around referencing the baby as a certain name in the city.

Yeah, but like to me, I have that name and just like Zach is just like.

So start using the name like in front of Zach, how you would use it.

I like traditional old names, so.

Me too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think there's something like classic and elegant and strong about them.

Yeah, but it's not.

As long as it's something that's like still contemporary.

Yeah, it's really about like history and just like your own family history.

I think it's just like so cool to think about like your ancestors and like if one of them were like roaming around and saw that like this little baby is named in some way for them.

By the way, Mr.

Fucking Opinionated like thinks he's the creator director.

Like he won't let me just even like to pick like strong editor.

A pillow.

A pillow on the couch.

Like let me pick my fucking pillow on my couch.

Same.

I don't want you to have an opinion about creating a picture.

That's true.

She put on, she was going to wear this olive shirt today that would have just completely not worked on the show.

By the way, I don't think so.

Tells me like

Kanye.

Literally.

Kanye, he goes the other day,

I think we need to edit your closet.

Like, better style than.

I know Kim Kanye.

It is Kanye vibes.

Well,

you can say it.

He doesn't think I have style.

I think, like, taste is a real thing.

I do have taste.

I'm not saying you don't have taste.

I'm saying.

I don't have style, and I don't, and I can't, I'm not a creative, but I think I have taste.

I put so much energy towards what I wear.

Like, it's just not, like, it's boring to me, to be honest.

I completely agree.

I put my energy towards other.

Yeah, I don't, I just, if someone could just tell me what to wear, I would just wear it.

I don't want to think about it.

Like, I don't really, I don't have a handbag right now.

I didn't bring my wallet money.

Like, here's how I explain it.

You know, when you walk into a place and you're like, oh my God, like, something just is not,

doesn't feel good in here, right?

It's like it's off.

And then you go to another place, you're like, damn, like, whoever did this, like, like, I have, yes, I have good feelings here.

Like, that is.

Are you saying that about my clothes?

No, no, no, I'm not.

By the way, these pajamas, pants are from Amazon.

They were $10.

Oh, and he's going to get mad.

I love your shoes.

$10.

I wear these shoes every day.

I'm like, I just can't get it.

Or, like, you walk into a beautiful place and then the music is completely counter to what I'm saying.

What my style is.

Okay, that's like a really niche issue, but sure.

Yeah, but it's, but it fucks the senses.

I guess.

You were complaining about that recently, actually.

Wasn't?

We had the party.

Michael puts a real emphasis.

We need a party.

We needed music.

We always do music.

No, it's the five senses.

You got to have, here's my thing: you got to have movement.

So movement to me is a fountain in the house or a sexy oil diffuser that's like going up like the caterpillar smoking his hookah.

And you got to have the right smell.

Smell, my baby shower, I scented.

I scented it in cotton candy.

So when you walked in, you immediately smelled cotton candy.

The scent is important.

And you also have to have music.

You have to have music.

Of course.

Of course.

Sorry to get so specific.

No, that's okay.

I feel that.

That's what I'm wasting my energy on.

It's like when you walk into someone's home, like there's some homes you go into chaotic.

Everything's all you don't know.

And like someone's like, wow, just like just a flow.

You just feel like immediately at ease.

Yeah.

It's true.

Five cents.

It's just hard to get it all right all the time.

Yeah.

Like we have to keep buying candles like after they run out.

Yeah.

You're going to listen to me like what a fucking asshole.

No.

They're like, the smell.

Before my final question for you, Lauren, is what I find it so interesting is like, I feel like for the most part, you said you've been blogging for 13 years.

I feel like everyone who's been on the internet for a while has slowly left their blogs behind, but your blog is like such an integral part of your brand.

Can you talk about like why you did that?

I am not going to abandon ship on the thing that I think sort of put the brand on the map.

I think a lot of people maybe were blogging for monetary reasons and like

sure that's an element of it, but I love to write.

I love to create blog content.

And I think that for me, my community wants to see very detailed.

And with the blog, you get that.

Yeah, and you can't on social.

Yeah.

And there's this book called The Slight Edge.

And it's like, you never want to stop doing what gave your brand traction in the beginning.

And like, sure, you can like, I'll blog, I'll microblog through Instagram story all the time.

Like, I'll write little like blog posts sort of on Instagram story, but if I just abandon that part and just took a picture of myself in the mirror, that's not staying true to what the blog started as.

There always has to be something that's like a valuable takeaway to not waste people's time.

So the blog is still a thing for me.

I think that's really cool.

People respect this, like doing stand-up.

It's, you know, those comedians that start, like, incredible comedians, and they kind of abandon that, like, no, now they're actors or whatever.

And they stop doing the stand-up, and all of a sudden, you're like, what, what happened to your, you know?

Well, because they say, like, if you can do stand-up, like, you can do anything.

Like, and that's true, but I think that, like, to not hone that craft and like consistently do it is a huge mistake.

But you're right.

Like, that's actually what happens with most comedians who blow up overnight.

Yeah, they stop doing the thing, and then all of a sudden, it's like...

They want to be movie stars, and that's great, but that's always what we say.

Like, I hate when my thing, like, Jackie Jokes said, I literally, like, say the same five things every episode.

But here's one of them.

Here's one of them.

I can't wait.

I hate when, I'm, like, nervous.

I hate when people hate the thing that made them famous.

Yes.

I hate when Hannah Montana, like, mighty hates Hannah.

I just, like, and like when they do interviews, they really want to talk about their new project and like not the project everyone actually wants to talk about.

By the way, no one's going to be able to do that.

No one wants to hear about a project either.

Like, talk about something that's like

the whole, yes.

Which includes that people.

My thing is, like, if you go on a podcast and you just have interesting conversation, not about your project, people will go seek you out.

Yes.

They will go find you.

If you're coming on, it's so promotional.

It's like...

It's boring.

Oh, no, no.

And then it's like you put it all like your eggs in this one project and then like whatever, six months from now, it's the next project.

And how is this always the thing that totally encapsulates you?

Whereas, oh, the thing before did not.

There's nothing worse than a podcast guest that comes on and all they want to do is pimp themselves out.

The audience can smell it.

Everyone can smell the bullshit.

It's not interesting for the hosts.

Like, just come on and just be a compelling person.

And if someone wants to go seek you out, out, they will.

100%.

Have you guys been following what's been going on with like Jake Paul and those guys?

Do you ever follow that a little bit?

Pretty much, yeah.

Okay, so like he started as a Disney kid, and I think he's such a marketing genius because he's gone and now he's doing all these fights.

But one of the things he just put up on his feed the other day was like him doing the old like Disney waving one.

And he's like, He's like, Look at what this Disney kid's going to do.

And when he goes to his events, he wears like the Gucci Disney thing.

And I'm like, that is a smart way to take something that propels you and continue it forward, but also transitioning and evolving into something else.

I just love a huge fan of the Paul brothers.

Like, I know that they're controversial.

I think that they're so smart, and I think what they've done is so, like, unbelievable.

Like, he literally fought Floyd Mayweather.

Like, that's insane.

Yeah, it is insane.

What he's done is

they're selling out statements.

And hate them, love them.

They are

smart and successful.

They're like the male versions of the Kardashians.

Yes.

And people, like, think that they're a joke, and they just keep going.

They keep training.

And they're like decent fucking fighters.

Like, they didn't.

Those kids can crack.

He stayed in the entire fight with Floyd Mayweather.

Like, he didn't win, but.

I think they also do a good example of doing the slight edge, but they also know how to evolve at the same time.

And that is a finesse.

And I think that's really like Logan.

I think Logan grew up, like, was way more famous than Jake, and like, it all just happened so fast for him.

And he just became a prick.

And I think he learned, like, in a hard way, like, how to, you know, come back down to earth.

And I don't know him at all.

This is just like what I gather from following.

I think he's like a much more evolved, like, mature person.

Yeah.

And there has to be room for that.

For evolution, and there has to be room.

There has to be like room to

forgive and grow.

Like, there's got to be room.

Yeah, we're all entitled to

grow up and make mistakes.

I just said something the other day to someone.

They said, well, you said, you know, six months ago that you didn't like this, and now you do.

And I just wrote back, I changed my mind.

No, like, you just.

And that is my new thing for 2022.

I changed my mind, and I'm allowed to change my mind.

How about that?

By the way, literally.

That's how minds work.

Literally, and part of the reason I did not want to write a book was was but i changed my mind about everything every day and i'm like i'm gonna write a whole book and then i bet i'll read it in a year and be like embarrassed that i had these opinions like so i literally put it in my book i'm like i'm just saying like i know that i might say say something in this book and then in a year on the podcast say something completely contradictory but that's because i change my mind all the time and that's fine

I don't know where we got to this point that you have to change.

You have to be like consistent with every opinion you've ever had.

Yeah.

Do you know what it's like on a micro level?

Have you ever, you know, you're in, you're like, you have a certain style and you're wearing that style and I think you look so great.

And like four years later you look back and you're like what the hell was I doing and at the time you thought you looked so fire that's in my book the gaucho pants used to literally I would get in trouble for wearing the same pants every day like they would be like you have to put them in the wash I used to wear these gaucho pants all the time and like could you see me wearing gaucho pants right now I mean I think you should bring them back Michael would kill I had a spiky hairstyle with like the old like so much gel and like spike at the time I was like damn I look cool you probably did whoa no but I look I look back now

perfect example of it yeah well you guys are just the best Thank you, guys.

And thank you for coming on the show.

Please, I'm going to give you the next kind of 30 seconds to a minute.

Promote anything you want.

You guys can follow me at Lauren Bostic.

We just did a podcast with you guys, which is not up yet, but it will be up.

You've both been on our podcast two times.

So if you guys want to go listen to that,

remember we sang a duet.

What did we say?

Yeah, Little Mermaid.

Yeah, we sang our duet.

In my memory, I have no idea what you guys are talking about.

We sat at a huge round table.

I remember the podcast.

I don't remember seeing it.

I remember you wearing a flannel, a red flannel.

I don't remember that.

Oh, yeah, she was.

Michael probably hated it.

Yeah, and my product line at the Skinny Confidential, lymphatic drainage, depuff the fuck out of your face.

I'm sending each of you one.

Can I get an ice roller?

Elizabeth's obsessed with it.

I'm going to send you an ice cream.

Elizabeth is obsessed with it.

And she sits in her bed.

You FaceTime her.

She's ice rolling 24-7 with the Skinny Confidential ice roller.

Oh, that makes sense.

I love mine.

I know who loves it.

Brew.

My dog loves when I do it.

I don't do it a lot, but he's always trying to get lymphatic drainage.

He does.

He needs to be grounding in everything.

Yeah, he's well-groomed.

Wait, before we wrap up, can we just talk about how you changed your Instagram from the Skinny Confidential to Lauren Bossig, and then you gave that username to your own brand, which I thought was so smart.

And now you have a line of skincare.

So I had And the Skinny Was Like, which was a place where consumers could go and find like Amazon finds.

Oh, I remember that.

Yeah, I did.

And I did that, like, knowing I was going to launch a brand.

So the people that were following along were people who,

you know, enjoyed, like, I don't, I don't like to push things on people.

They enjoy shopping products.

Right.

And so when it was time to switch to the product line, we switched that to at the skinny confidential.

And now I am Lauren Bostick.

That's crazy.

Sometimes I work.

I just changed mine to Jackie Ashre like six months ago, and it was the best thing I ever did.

Yeah, she was Jackie O problems forever.

I like that name, though.

I liked it.

It served a purpose, but ever since I've changed it, like I have not looked back.

Michael, don't look back.

It was emblematic of the time when you made it, but now it's like we've evolved on social so much.

Oh, by the way, hot tip really quick.

Sorry, another one.

Get your baby's Instagram handle the second the baby's dead.

Does I was having Instagram?

I would only do that so someone doesn't take it.

Well, here's the thing.

People get really mad about this.

Like I've seen people get mad that we did that.

We don't post anything about the baby.

There's but like I'm just well we post a little bit on my stories, but she doesn't post

but it's just so that she has it when she's in the business.

There are some assholes out there that'll just do things to take like assholes.

Yeah, if you put yourself out in the in a public light, like they're gonna go and like, I took the name.

I don't even buy the name.

So I'm like, before we got every name, it's like, you want to do anything?

If she wants it later, she can have it.

If she doesn't, it doesn't matter.

That's so smart.

I was like pushing on the table, and Michael's like, I got her name.

Good.

That's important.

That's actually a really good piece of advice.

No, but I mean, like, I think people-I mean, I don't want to have a fight with someone later and have to like bribe some dude or to give

your kids' name, you know?

Yeah, yeah.

She's gonna have to use it.

Maybe she's gonna get it.

That's a good business if you want to start a business.

Just to yell celebrities and influencers' baby names.

Well, you guys are the best.

Thank you so much for coming on.

Thank you for having me.

And you guys will see you tomorrow.

Bye.

Bye.