S4 Ep104: Ben Aflac: Thursday, June 10th, 2021

Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy Thursday.

Let us acknowledge a space that we are in.

We have made it to the latter half of the week, everyone.

Congratulations yourself.

Clap your hands.

Give yourselves a round of applause.

Pat yourself on the back.

We motherfucking did it.

Latter half of the week vibes.

And we're in the studio tomorrow, but I feel as though some of you might have a summer Friday for yourselves, a long weekend for yourselves.

And so acknowledge that, Stace.

This could be your last day of work for the week.

And we're so proud of you for coming this far.

And it feels so good to be over the hump, especially especially on a week that never has it never ends speaking of long weekends i do feel like now would be a good time to let everyone know like i'm not gonna be in studio on monday i have a wedding i just needed to warn everyone like these next like four or five months while the weather's nice in new york all the weddings that were postponed from COVID are gonna be in the next four months and for me most of them are Jewish weddings which are on Sunday nights and if they're like away so I have a Sunday night wedding in the Hampton so we are not gonna do a show Monday I just thought I would let everyone know now I'm really sorry but the good news is is that yesterday we recorded a podcast general Q ⁇ A, which everyone loves.

It's been about six months since we did one.

We took all of your questions from the Toast After Dark Facebook group, and we'll be releasing that episode on Monday.

So if you're a Patreon member, you will have content.

Don't you worry about a thing.

And if you're not a Patreon member, you can become one at patreon.com slash the morning toast.

It's such an important fact.

You know, it's like, it's never too late to become a Patreon member.

Ever.

Ever, because you also get access to old episodes unless they've been taken down for copyright reasons, in which case you should just join now so you never miss an episode.

Yeah, that's a yes to the dress episode will forever live as like a

iconic episode.

A lesson.

That only people who were Patreon members at the time got to see.

It was a lesson, I think.

Snatcheler, learn your lesson.

Don't miss Patreon episodes.

Speaking of Snatcheler, I filmed one with her a vlog last night that is just like so cute and funny and good.

Knowles and Bruce are in it and that'll be up soon.

What's the concept?

The concept is we're getting Snitch ready for her date.

Me and Bruce came over to style her for her date and she didn't really need you'll I don't want to spoil it.

Yep.

But it was really good and she I don't want to spoil how she looked but it was good So I went to the movies last night for the first time since before COVID and I have to say it was such an unpleasant experience first of all I went to see a quiet place too because you know how I saw a quiet place one right.

Do you need me to remind everyone?

I'll set the scene.

Okay 30,000 feet up, sitting next to her friend Abe.

He's watching, she's not.

She looks over his shoulder, winds up watching the whole movie, didn't need headphones because it's a silent film.

And if there is communication, it's through sign language and there were subtitles.

So me and Abe saw it again last night.

We wanted to see it together.

I wanted to book a theater, completely booked, not one single seat.

I was like, great, the movie theater has bounced back.

Then I went to another theater closer to my house, so I was happy.

We were the only people in the theater.

And then it was one of those huge theaters, so like 75 seats, just me and Abe.

And then right before the movie started, Some man came in by himself and sat in the back row alone.

So of course, like, I'm just like freaking out.

Like, it's just like a scary setup.

And it's a a scary movie.

And the theater that we were in was empty, but the whole institution was empty too.

And there was like construction.

So it was just like a really creepy place to see a creepy movie.

And like every time I went to the bathroom, I like thought there was going to be a monster like in the toilet, like going to grab my coochie.

So I ran.

And here are my thoughts on the film.

I think that the premise of a quiet place is such a good idea that like it couldn't be a bad movie.

And it was not bad in any way, shape, or form.

But

it was not good you know first of all and I'm happy about it because you know I hate long movies but when it ended I'm like I was fully prepared for like a full other hour I'm like this ending is not it like get everyone back together I'm not gonna spoil anything

and I was just like meh meh meh they opened the movie it's a prequel before the world turned and you know they were just like a normal family going prequel because I was gonna say that means quiet place one ended badly if there was quiet place two right and like it didn't they ended this this.

Okay.

I don't want to, whatever.

So the prequel lasted five minutes.

I thought they were going to keep going back to the prequel.

I liked the prequel, but there was no, nothing more than I was like, I don't even understand.

And so basically, they showed us the prequel so we could learn one thing that comes back towards the end of the movie.

And it's supposed to be like this iconic moment.

Like, remember what you learned in the prequel.

And it was like not that

brilliant.

Like, sorry.

Oh, yeah.

Sorry.

It was fine.

Like, it was nice to go to to the movies and be with Abe and, like, you know, be back in the.

I'm happy for you.

I just have no idea.

I know.

I know you can't talk about movie theater.

I'm not going to comment on movie theaters and the experience, the way you feel about One Tree Hill is the way I feel about movie theaters.

I probably will never go to a movie theater again in my life.

I'll never bring it up again.

No, no, no.

I'm happy for you.

You know, these things happen.

Especially to us.

100%.

So I'm happy for you that you had a good experience, sort of.

No, I would say the experience was maybe a three out of five.

You had an experience, which is exciting.

Huge.

But then, like, I watched a scary movie and got home, and Ben was out to dinner, and I was like freaked out, like in my apartment all alone.

Thank God Theo was there to protect me.

Oh, he's such a protective guard dog.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I'm happy for you.

Thank you.

I have no desire to see that movie.

Didn't see one.

One was very good, actually.

Yeah.

And now, like, movies are always on demand.

So I have.

So you never have to go to a theater again.

Phew.

Phew.

Well, today's show was great because we didn't do deer toasters yesterday because we had just done it, but we wanted to get in our weekly regular deer toasters without our celebrity friends like Chelsea Handler.

So, today we're going to do deer toasters.

We're going to recap Real House Size of Beverly Hills.

We've got the Fast Five.

Yes, we have a lot.

I'm really excited to talk about the Fast Five.

There are some really good stories in there that I'm really excited to get your opinion on.

Other than that, it was a quiet day for me, a quiet place for me.

And of course, per usual, I can't remember what I did.

I hung out with Snatchler.

Oh, a day well spent is a day with a Snatcher.

Yeah.

So that was a highlight of my dad.

You should have seen Knowles and Bruce.

They were, you don't understand, when they hang out, they play hard the entire time.

I think I was over there for an hour.

They don't stop.

They were so wiped out.

Bruno's tongue was falling out of his mouth.

He has the biggest tongue ever, apparently.

Yeah, he does.

I need to show you this picture.

His tongue, his tongue looks like a human long tongue.

Ooh, yeah.

Okay.

Sounds good.

Okay, don't be like that

dugger girl.

Oh!

Oh, my God.

okay, fine.

I won't embrace my inner chill dugger today.

Okay, no promises about tomorrow, though.

Oh, you know, anything can happen on a Friday.

Vain.

Vain.

Um, so if that's all, I really don't have much else life updates to share with you.

Me, neither.

I'm just trying to get through the week.

Me too, but I do have a few things.

As always, I did make quite a few mistakes on yesterday's show, and I just want to issue some corrections.

Okay, and I wanted to show that I watched the fight of Trinidad and Ethan.

Yeah, I watched the first of all, I turned on the episode and I watched like maybe a minute in the beginning, which I'm glad that I did because she came in there with an attitude.

And I don't know if she's always like that, but like, they, oh, oh, I'm sorry.

It's okay.

They came in there with an attitude.

I don't know if they're always like that.

They had a bone to pick.

And I knew.

Interesting.

I didn't watch the beginning of the episode.

Just even one minute.

I don't know if they're always like, maybe they are always like that.

And Ethan just puts up with it because she's

talented.

No, I think that you're like, I think, and I read a lot of the comments, like, Trisha said that they were were having a bad day.

Like, and I think that was understood.

So I do believe the result at the end of the episode after sitting there for two hours is because Trisha had a bad day and was just like in a mood, which is understandable, happens to the best of us.

Got it.

And so.

Did you watch an actual fight?

Of course.

Okay.

And it made me so uncomfortable.

And it's like, we don't even fight on this show, but sometimes like we pretend to fight like about dumb stuff, like one hit, wonder.

And I don't even want to do that anymore because it's like, I don't want to have one whiff of that.

We were fighting about really serious issues.

I don't want to have one whiff of what that was.

it was so painful and ethan well the issue i would just wanted to make a correction on was i said that moses worked at h3 who is trisha's fiancé he doesn't he just goes there to support i thought he did it's not like a it doesn't change anything that doesn't change anything for me it wasn't germane no it was not germane whatsoever but ethan did a podcast by himself on the h3 podcast yesterday just kind of explaining um how he's been completely transparent with Trisha the entire time about what the 5% goes to.

I'm not worried about the 5%.

Me neither.

H3 production literally pays for the step, pays for the equipment all the graphic design gets the episodes uploaded and they're the ad sales they're the one who reach out to brands to get sponsors for the show and so if there's a little leftover from the five percent and it doesn't go exactly to everyone until they put it in the h3 bank that seems fine it's how business is done so like basically ethan did a whole episode like explaining why he's been every month he sends trisha like a full excel spreadsheet of like the expenses he couldn't be more transparent so like it's even more hurtful that like that's what this fight is about when like he literally went out of his way from the very beginning to like make sure trisha knew like exactly what was going on with the money.

Yeah.

Trisha was just being very condescending towards Ethan like his ideas are bad and then also manipulating him into telling him that he was gaslighting them and I just it made me really uncomfortable.

It made me feel really sad and it's clear that Ethan was just down to put up with it and wasn't gonna make it a big deal and then Tricia just kept going with it.

No, I know.

And I understand that's probably part of their dynamic and a lot of what Trisha brings to the table.

And so I can appreciate that that is Trisha's personality,

but it seemed to be taken too far.

I agree.

And it's sad for the fans.

And the other correction I wanted to make is I kept, we did obviously a whole segment on Jack Black from School of Rock.

And I said his name was Ed Schneibly, but it's Ned Schnieblé.

So I'm sorry.

Ned Schniebly.

Ned, not Ed.

And not Schneiblé.

Well, that's actually a direct quote from the movie.

Schnieblé.

Okay, but Ned Schnendle.

No, it's Schneible.

Sorry.

Sorry.

You're going to have to issue another correction tomorrow.

I just did.

It's Ned Schneble.

I'm sorry.

That's my official and final decree.

Okay.

Thank you for that.

We love a correction.

And I don't make corrections every day because if I did, we would have to have a new segment, Claudia's Corrections.

No, like just our corrections, period.

You probably should add that segment.

That'd be really funny.

That actually would be funny.

But then, like, I feel like it opens up the floor for people to see.

I was like, you got this wrong.

Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no.

We're not doing that.

Never mind.

We're not.

Segment.

Idea scrapped.

Okay, without further ado, dido, where are you?

Right here, being perfect, over the hump.

He's so happy.

He doesn't have to hump his mom anymore.

It is time for the fastback stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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Okay, first story, big news of the day.

Lil John, Titus Burgess, Lance Bass, and as we know, David Spade will replace Chris Harrison on Bachelor in Paradise.

Wow, I literally never get news for the first time on this show.

I guess like I was at the movies and like I was just busy.

Yeah.

But I didn't hear say it again.

Chris Harrison is being replaced by a slew of celebrities on Bachelor in Paradise this summer.

Lil John.

Why?

David Spade.

Why?

Titus Burgess.

Love.

Lance Bass.

And more.

Variety has learned.

Woof, woof, woof.

This is like, first of all, my worst nightmare because not only are we not getting like a stable figure like we had hoped, we're also getting like some of the thirstiest celebrities.

Like, love his work.

But

Lance Bass is like a grown-up Frankie Grande, and it's just like thirst oozing out.

And this is like a particularly thirsty move.

They couldn't even get like eight listers.

No.

Titus Burgess, I'm I'm not gonna lie, is a great choice.

I know, but it's like the bigger the star that's in this mix, it's like, so why isn't it just this person?

Yeah, this honestly makes no fucking sense.

I hate this idea, me too.

The celebs will serve as rotating hosts through the summer season, which just went into production in Mexico this week, which is an interesting fact.

So, I think there will be other people too who are joining in.

I am not here for this.

I know, I think that a lot of people are.

Oh, really?

Yeah, or maybe people just like try to be positive about news that they hear.

Can't relate.

Can't relate.

I'm not here for this.

We want we want you to make a choice.

And not only that, but like what is this?

Jeopardy?

No.

And Jeopardy gets A-listers.

Yeah.

I love Titus Burgess.

Like I'm a big, big fan of his work.

He is not A-list.

No one on that list is maybe

David Spade.

No, no, no, no.

No, no, no.

I take it back.

I take it back.

None of them.

So like...

I just don't understand why not only are we getting a rotation of people, a rotation of, sorry, people with a little bit of like a loo hoozery background i agree i don't think it bodes well i'm still gonna be watching because i think bachelor in paradise is a very good show me too but i'm not pleased no me neither and i'm actually really surprised because this

you would you would think that the franchise would be doing all that it could to salvage salvage the ratings they're so down we reported on that earlier this week the ratings are down there's so many scandals in the press like you would think they'd be doing all that they can like they would just pay like fucking you know, Kim Kardashian to do it just to breathe some life into the

I think this is them doing that.

Of the people who are willing to do it, they think they got all these, like, big names to host Bachelor in Paradise.

Honestly, like, the Bachelor franchise is like a fixture in American culture.

Like, they could get way bigger celebrities if they wanted to.

Like, I don't feel like this is on par.

And think of the celebrities who watch.

The Bachelor.

Charlie Seron taking a picture with a billboard of Peter Weber, like, so excited for the new season.

Like, Mim, Gigi Hadid,

she dated Tyler Zee.

Like, so many celebrities watch Ratcher.

Kim Kardashian had a Hannah Ann cake.

Yeah.

This is what we get?

I just don't think it's good enough.

No, it's not.

Almost seems like self-sabotage.

Yeah, I agree.

It's a really terrible idea.

Agreed.

Sorry to rain on your preview if you thought this was a good idea.

Okay, next story.

Such crazy new romance news.

Kanye West and Irina Shake returned to the U.S.

together after a romantic

French trip.

Okay, so we shared the rumors that they were dating, but now there's photos.

They were in France for his birthday.

Now they're back in the U.S.

And I think that this is extreme, like, it's real, you guys.

It's happening.

Yeah, oh, 100%.

It's happening.

They're paparazzi picks, like, it's real.

Yeah, unless, like, they're business partners, just like I said about J-Lo and

Ben Affleck.

Affleck?

Afflecked.

Affleck.

How did no one ever flex?

How did nobody ever put that together?

Ben Affleck.

I love that.

That's good.

Blood.

Blood.

Okay.

So they're spotted together.

They were spotted together.

Maybe they're working on like a new friend.

They're dating.

Yeah, they're dating.

They took a business trip on his birthday.

Like, no.

He never stops working.

No, they're dating.

And we need to kind of acknowledge the space that we're in.

Like, the two of them are moving forward.

I do feel like Kim is probably dating, but for some reason, like, she's actually become more private than Kanye.

I don't know.

I don't know how to feel about this.

I'm like annoyed that like he got it first, you know, like I'm team Kim like so staunchly.

So like I wanted her like to win but it's fine.

I think she won.

I think she like I think she won and I'm actually really happy for Kanye.

Like I'm happy he has something.

I'm happy he has some love and just the way that I feel like it went down, he would have stayed married.

Well, of course, because he was the one who got to do whatever he wanted, like flying around, living in different states while like literally two kids.

Kim is probably in a relationship, too.

I think she's definitely dating under the radar, like 100%.

But I just think it's important that I go on record that I like don't ship this.

Like, I'm happy for them individually.

And I think it's important that I go on record and say that I do ship this, and that I'm really happy for him.

And this seems like a couple of fabulous people.

And, you know, it's really hard.

It's going to be hard for Kim too to top Kanye.

And it's going to be hard for Kanye to top Kim.

And I think that Irene.

He hasn't topped Kim, but he's done pretty well for me.

Yeah, this is a really, a really nice choice.

Yeah, I'm dying to know who the next couple people that Kim is going to date are, or at least people she's been spotted with.

She's been linked to Van Jones from CNN, even though they said it was true, not true.

I actually could see them going on a date, having a good intellectual conversation, but maybe nothing more, no chemistry.

Maybe, but they were also working together, so I don't think they would need to go on a date to find that out.

That's true.

So they're either like totally in love or they're just working together.

Or, but you tried it, you know?

Like, he asked her out, like, she's single, you know, why not?

You think he asked her out?

100%.

I mean, if you were working with Kim Carson, wouldn't you

shoot your shot?

Who else was she linked to?

Oh, very briefly, she was linked to Maluma.

She was?

Yeah, when she went to Miami for the opening of that, like, whatever restaurant, they were both there.

Oh, I love it.

And there was like one report from a source, not verified at all, but I actually thought that was a really good match.

Agreed.

Yeah.

As far as I know, those are the only two people she's been like publicly linked to.

And with no proof for either of them.

Okay, cool.

That's so an exciting prospect.

Anyways, I have a ship and I'm just excited.

All aboard.

You can come online if you want to party for a day and then you can.

Yeah, no, I'm not building a ship by any means, nor am I boarding any, but

I'm on the dock happy for everyone involved.

I'm trying to stay positive about everything between the two of them because it's too sad for me otherwise.

I know.

You know what?

I really respect that.

Thank you.

Speaking of Kardashians, our next story, Kim Kardashian posted a sneak peek at the explosive Keeping Up with the Kardashians reunion trailer with

you guys.

I think I was sort of down on this reunion idea just because you were, yeah, I was right, yeah, because I don't know, it just seemed like probably we weren't gonna get what we wanted, and we'd just be like fluff and all the other like sorts of specials that they do, like Kim's birthday, where we talk, watch all old footage, no one wants to be there.

But this looks like what we needed it to be.

It looks like an Andy Cohen production, like he really went,

they kind of used the trailer to

show

what topics were discussed from top to bottom.

And we got Tristan cheating.

We got Caitlin and Chris, you know, after the transition, the Vanity Fair article, all the drama.

We've got, it looks what appears to be a Chris Humphreys moment.

Yes.

We've got a Travis Barker mention, and Scott.

Scott.

We've got, I think that was a, that was it from the trailer, at least.

Yeah, no, and I'm sure there's so much more.

So the way that it's set up, and it really feels like a housewives reunion, but it's Andy in the middle, two couches, and the couches go on the left, Kim sitting next to Andy, of course,

Courtney next to Kim, Kendall next to Courtney.

I think that makes sense.

I kind of would see Kim and Chloe on the same couch because I feel like Kim and Courtney, I mean, if they go out into fights, like, you know?

Yeah, I mean, but it's the same thing because.

Yeah, actually, no, you're right.

And then on the other side, we have Chris, Chloe, Kylie.

I'm so happy to see Kendall and Kylie there.

Me too, because like when before the trailer like officially started and they showed the set, basically the set is like comprised of all these images of all the different spin-offs and shows they had and there was life of Kylie in there.

And I totally forgot about that show.

I gotta go back and watch that.

Yeah, no, that was so good.

Yeah, I mean, I really don't feel like Kendall's really gonna have much to offer, except from the perspective of growing up on the show and like not knowing life without it, like being like eight when the show started.

That's always what she talks about.

Like, even when Chloe did the interview for the time capsule, which was like so Zoe 101, but turned out to be really cute.

And she talks about like growing up on the show, but that's not like what we're talking about.

Or the only thing she has to offer.

I guess they could discuss the Pepsi scandal.

Yeah.

That was like Kendall's thing.

Yeah.

Because they really don't.

And even I feel like Kendall tried to contribute more to the show.

Shit, anxiety traveling to London with Jen.

And I guess like everyone said no, thanks.

Yeah, no, thank you so much for participating, but no, thank you.

I'm so excited.

The finale is stunning.

It's tonight.

It's tonight.

And so this is next week.

Yeah.

How long does it say it is?

I need like two hours.

I need two years.

I know.

Because it really seems like they agreed to this kind of no holds bar, talk about anything.

Chris was very nervous.

At least that's how they made it seem.

Now, I don't know if they had some sort of agreement, like we'll talk about this, but not this.

But it seems like they're really just kind of letting it all out.

And I'm sure they're so thrilled.

I'm sure they have some sort of agreement.

I'm sure there are still going to be things that he doesn't pry too much in exchange for other things.

Yeah.

I'm certainly going to tune in.

I think it'll be great.

I think it'll really be like a...

Like a benchmark moment in pop culture.

I'm really excited.

I take back what I said.

I was wrong.

Well, it hasn't premiered yet, but I'm pretty sure I was wrong.

Wow.

And what about Olivia Rodrigo being a one-hit wonder?

I don't think that she will be, but it's still too soon to call.

Set an alarm on your phone for three years from now.

We can call in three years, okay?

We'll do.

Are you ready for our next story?

It's a little boring news.

The boring company?

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Elon Musk's boring loop is finally transporting passengers in Las Vegas.

I saw a TikTok of the whole experience.

The experience looks so cool.

We saw Kylie Kylie do it, and now passengers can use the loop.

It like transports you through Vegas.

It's like a 1.3-mile loop, and you're just escaping the traffic, which is why.

It's 1.3 miles.

Yeah, because

I'm not sure where it takes you, but it's for people.

Right now, you can only do it if you're going to a convention at the Las Vegas Convention Center.

Right, because it's like underground, and there's like a whole station underground, the convention center.

I watched a TikTok because when I watched Kylie's story, it looked like there's a, however many, how many miles is it from Vegas to LA?

Like 300?

Yeah, a lot of miles.

I thought it was like a 300-mile tunnel.

I'm like, that way sounds like a tunnel to around the world.

Yeah, I'm like, that sounds claustrophobic center, like an MRI torture chamber, but it's not like that.

The loop, sorry, the tunnel itself is only about a mile.

And then there's like all these other, like this underground station.

Like, it's not just one straight tunnel.

Yeah, but it's pretty cool that it's

coming.

It's happening for real.

And it's very cool that it's free.

Yeah.

And it's the future.

How does that make money?

I don't know.

Well, I think you have to have a Tesla to get in it.

Got it.

I guess because the fumes, you know?

The fumes and maybe like there's something on the cars that like click into the tunnel.

I don't know.

I'm probably also thinking about this like in a not futuristic way.

Oh, I actually think I saw on the TikTok like you might have to go on self-driving at a certain mile per hour for the tunnel.

I think that's what I saw.

Interesting.

That makes sense.

Yeah.

Anyways, I think it's just another reason why we need to go to Vegas.

Oh, 100%.

I told you, did I say this on the podcast?

I think Patreon.

I'm thinking about maybe going to Vegas next weekend.

I think you should.

I think that you'll never regret going to Vegas.

I think Vegas is always a good idea.

Oh, okay.

Shan of Ador.

Okay, are you ready for our fifth and final story?

It's some really amazing world news.

It's the final story.

And it's the final story brought to you, of course.

I'll give you one guess.

There's so many.

No, there's loads.

Is there only the one?

Yeah.

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Okay, fifth and final story: a little World Oceans Day news.

A little W-O-D-N.

M?

Yeah.

There is now a fifth ocean.

Okay, what were the four?

The four was Pacific Ocean, Atlantic Ocean, Indian Ocean, and Arctic Ocean.

Okay, like what about the Mediterranean?

That's a sea.

What about the Indian?

Indian

Ocean.

Oh, yes, that's what I said.

Pacific, Atlantic Ocean.

I feel like there's more than four.

I feel like there's more than four.

There's Indian Arctic and now

Southern Ocean.

I don't care.

There's more oceans.

There's four?

There were, and now there's five.

That cover the whole planet?

Yeah, but they're also all connected, so it's really just one ocean.

They're not all connected.

Oh, the oceans are?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure.

But, like, not all bodies of water.

No, no.

No, some are lands.

I'm like, it's a lake.

Like, a lake.

And, like, yeah, like a pond.

Yeah.

Okay, okay.

Um, World Oceans say National Geographic Cartographers say the swift current circling Antarctica keeps the waters there distinct and worthy of their own name.

The Southern Ocean.

In Antarctica?

Yep.

Here's a little map.

Isn't it the North?

North Pole, Antarctica?

Is it on the bottom?

It's in the bottom, yeah.

Okay.

But it is a circle, so it's confusing.

Anti-geography.

But since National Geographic began making maps in 1915, it has recognized four oceans, the Atlantic, Pacific, Indian, and Arctic Oceans.

Which do you prefer, Atlantic or Pacific?

I mean, I'm clearly an Atlantic girly, but like you go to LA once and you're like, oh, the Pacific.

Yeah, the Pacific gets a sunset.

Like, we get the sunrise, and I've never seen it in my life.

No, yeah.

I'm pretty sure the Pacific is superior, but they're also all connected.

What is the ocean that's like in Turks and Caicos and like the Caribbean?

Atlantic.

It's stunning.

It is stunning.

I love like

clear waters.

Virgin Island.

Yeah, like the clear turquoise water.

Where is that?

That's in the Atlantic Ocean.

And what about Fiji?

What ocean's that?

Pacific, I think.

But I'm not entirely sure, but I'm pretty sure.

It's the Battle of the Oceans.

It's the Battle of the Oceans.

And now starting on June 8th, World Oceans Day, National Geographic will recognize the Southern Ocean as the world's fifth ocean.

I don't know if I'm ready for that.

Honestly, I just learned that there were four.

I don't know if I'm ready for five.

And I also like, they are all one.

So it was kind of silly that we even divided them into four to begin with.

Now, let me ask you another question.

What's the difference between a sea and an ocean?

Like, the Mediterranean's not an ocean?

The Mediterranean is not an ocean.

I'll pull up a map.

No, no, pull up a definition of what's the difference between an ocean and a sea.

Okay.

Sea is smaller.

Sea is smaller.

But still, like, is a sea connected to the oceans?

The sea, I think, hold on, I'm pulling up a map.

And what are some other seas?

Okay, so the Mediterranean Sea, as you can see right here, it does connect to the Atlantic Ocean.

But then the Mediterranean Sea is really its own endless city.

Does it connect to the Mediterranean Ocean from the Suez Canal?

Oh, where is the Suez?

No, I don't think so.

Okay.

God.

The seas are partially.

So like a harbor.

And that's exactly what.

No, a harbor is like where the ships come in.

I just feel like we really don't need that many words for water.

Like sea,

harbor, so much ships.

There's so much water, stream, pond.

They're so different.

They're so different.

Water.

Also, the Mediterranean Sea connects to the Atlantic Ocean by the Strait of Gibraltar.

Oh, the Straits of Gibraltar.

I thought.

I thought you needed to know that.

And then the Mediterranean Sea also.

One more mile to Gibraltar.

The walls will crumble.

Sorry.

One more what?

I forget.

So that's the ocean news.

That's ocean news.

And honestly, that's big fucking news.

It is.

That's like a new planet.

That's like, they have to reprint all the textbooks because the old ones, when you're learning about oceanography,

not going to cut it anymore.

No, not going to cut it.

So I do think it's like a little extreme.

I don't know.

Yeah, also, like, if you're,

what grade do you think you learned that there were four oceans?

Second grade.

No, really?

Okay, so let's say like the kids for the next few years, when asked on the test, like how many oceans are there, they write four, which is like technically correct.

Yeah.

Do you think that they'll get the points?

I think that they will.

I think it's going to take a while for this to catch on.

And also, like, National Geographic decided.

They are, you know, a big institution, but like, that's not like the World Ocean Co.

UN.

It's not the World Oceans Committee.

Totally, not the WAC.

No.

Okay.

Let's talk about Real Housewives at Beverly Hills for our TV recap segment.

We finished up in Tahoe and we started in Tahoe and we ended in the divorce.

So let's just take it from the beginning where Crystal and Sutton just like keep missing each other.

Yeah.

I don't know how to feel because I do feel like Crystal is justified in being very weirded out by Sutton.

Because Sutton's weird.

But I do think like she took it like a little far.

Like not coming to dinner, being kind of rude on the boat when, like, even though Sutton was being so annoying with her facial roller, like, I did not think that was funny or cute.

No, it was so dramatic.

And also, just explain that you're using it so that you don't cry because you're coming off even crazier.

It's like this woman who needs to wander face.

Like, and Sutton's not even that crazy.

She's just like really sensitive.

Also, so I appreciate like when Crystal and Sutton were talking like I really appreciate like that Crystal is just like a no-nonsense person like I'm like I'm not gonna be friends with a crazy person like I'm just not I'm not gonna pretend like it's normal blah blah blah but like the thing about Sutton is that she's so harmless and she really is the weakest link that it seems like not a fair fight but crystal doesn't know that no no I know so I'm saying as a viewer it's like not a fair fight like it's like Sutton is honestly irrelevant to this group.

Like she doesn't set the tone.

It's not like if you're not in with Sutton, you're not in with anyone.

Sutton's like on the fringe.

So I look forward to Crystal bringing that no-nonsense energy into a fight with someone who is worthy, where it's like this person is saying everything

that we are all thinking and not letting this person get away with anything.

Like, I look, so I'm really excited that that is who Crystal is.

I just felt like in that instance, it's like, Sutton, it's like Lisa Rena said, she's harmless.

Yes, but I do think that

shit, what was I going to say?

That Crystal.

Wait, I had a really good point to make.

Give me four seconds, okay?

Okay.

Crystal.

Thank you.

I really, really appreciated that, like, all the women were like, you know, she's going through a hard time with her house.

And Crystal's like, moving out of a house, moving out of like your mansion to another mansion is not a reason to like act crazy.

And I totally agreed with that.

Like, I think that whatever, for whatever reason, Sutton was acting weird.

for the whole day.

And the next day, she acknowledged that she was acting weird, but she was like looking for a reason for it.

And I don't think it's moving houses.

I really don't.

No, but I mean, we don't really know a lot of Sutton's backstory, I think, because her ex-husband doesn't let her talk about it.

So I would imagine that in moving her house, it has to do with her divorce.

And I don't know if she, we don't even know if she has kids.

Like, what does that mean for her actual life?

I think it's more than the house and just like a life that she once had.

Like, anytime one of the women is going through a divorce and moving and downsizing or whatever it is, like they're Shannon Medor syndrome.

Do you think she's downsizing?

No, I I think that you think it's a money thing?

No, I don't think it's a money thing.

I think it's a space thing.

Like you had had a full house

and now you don't.

And so, I think it's not just about moving the house, it's about a life that she had, that her life is changing.

And, like, I think a lot of women on housewives go through that.

100%.

And they're always given a little space to be nuts.

Yeah, then maybe she just didn't explain herself well, which I think.

But I don't think she can because we don't even know if she has kids.

Yeah.

She's never spoken about her ex-husband, but I think the other women know what goes on in Sutton's house.

Yes, I think so, too.

So they'll accept the house as an explanation.

Got it.

And I really just think we should spend some time discussing Lisa Rena.

Oh my God, this was not a good episode for Rinna.

She came off so poorly.

And I have, and I said this at the very first episode.

Like, this group has evolved so much and they've kind of elevated so much in terms of the people, their backgrounds, the storylines.

And honestly, like Lisa Rina and her lunacy, not cutting it anymore.

I really feel like the show could go on without her.

She's no longer the center of the group.

For a while, like her crew with like Erica and Darit, like they were the cool girl.

Like, it's not it anymore.

I don't fully agree with you that, like, the new people who have come on have sort of like taken, like, made less space for Rina.

My thing about Rinna, it's like when she was in the pool doing the synchronized dancing, like, she is addicted to attention.

Like, when no one would come in the pool with her, and she's in there shouting, and like, she just like wanted everyone to like come and watch Rinna swim and be crazy and the cameras.

And the women were like, We're not getting, like, getting in the pool sounds like the worst fucking idea ever.

Of course, there are full hair and makeup.

Right.

It was so silly, and it was just like, it was a really like sad moment.

It was an illusory moment.

i and and that coming off of the dinner where she was really held her feet to the fire not only that and not only

horrible analogy that she made that makes no sense and in the words of garcel she should never share again okay trigger warning sexual assault explain to me How this story about Harry Hamlin having drinks with his friends and then finding out after the man left the drinks, he went on to commit a sex crime.

How at all, and then Harry not wanting to visit him in prison, but all of the friends wanted to visit him.

How at all that relates to a story about Lisa Rinna leading a ring of women to out Denise Richards as bisexual?

No.

Explain parallels.

I would love to know.

It was so insane.

There is no parallel.

Like, is she trying to say that Harry's friend, like that the rape was

is in this situation the same as Denise hooking up with Brandy?

No.

Okay, so then what she said was that she knows so much more information, so many secrets that she'll never share, which is such a cop-out, by the way,

that make the story make sense, essentially.

So are you saying Denise committed a crime?

Like, what are you saying?

What are you saying?

And if you really can't share.

Shut up.

Yeah, and I didn't love it.

I love Garcelle holding it.

I'm loving this story.

I love that Garcelle won't let it go.

I hope she continues to not let it go.

I'm not over it.

This is not an adequate explanation.

And like Garcel said, like, you didn't have to be the ringleader of let's hold Denise accountable.

Especially as her best friend.

You could have held Denise accountable.

You didn't have to rally the troops.

You don't have to be your best friend's number one enemy.

Not to get back into the whole Denise thing of it all, accountability?

For what?

A decision she made in her personal life?

She doesn't owe these women anything.

Like, that's what's so crazy.

Like,

Denise 100% lied to all the women because it's none of their fucking business.

And first of all, she's not ready to share that yet.

So this, this, this thing that like Denise needed to be held accountable, why?

We all make decisions in our personal lives and we don't know anyone an explanation.

If I'm going to go out and fuck someone, I'm going to go do that.

And that literally, I don't have to answer to anyone, but Ben.

Rina's answer to you would be that they're on a television show and their personal lives are the story.

Didn't happen on the show.

Just say.

I'm just, I think that there are some things that they don't have to bear all.

I'm just so over Rina.

Like, and I have been for a while, and this season's like really the nail in the coffin.

Like, she's, I think, overcompensating.

There's so many women now, and it's easy to get lost.

Honestly, sometimes I'd like, I'm going to see the group.

I'm like, I don't even know who's missing.

There's so many of them.

And so many people stand out.

And Lisa Rena is like truly fading to the background.

And kind of Erica is too, except now this big bombshell.

Erica is too, but she doesn't mind being in the background because she has no complex.

She knows that she's a star.

So it's like, if I'm not getting the spotlight right now, that doesn't mean that

doesn't mean I don't shine.

100%.

And then, of course, the episode ended with this bombshell.

I thought it was actually really lovely that she gave them all a heads up.

Yeah.

And they didn't find out in the press.

It's just crazy that they were with her not two days before.

Four days.

Okay, four days before, where she obviously had everything in motion ready to file.

I think she intentionally filed on election day

to bury the story as much as she could.

No one was talking about it.

It would have been a much bigger story.

It was still big, but imagine if it wasn't election day.

There's only historic election.

There's only so much space it could have taken up on the news.

So she knew everything was going to happen.

And if we didn't know that that was happening, her behavior and Tahoe gave nothing away.

Not a thing.

But I did notice how they aired a couple like random

quotes that Erica said that normally probably wouldn't have made the cut, but now in hindsight, of course, they look spooky.

Yeah.

That you never know what's going on.

No, not even that.

That Tom, well, those interviews were filmed probably after.

But when she stepped on the boat, took our cell, that Tom has, like, he is a lawyer through and through.

He loves the law, helping people.

It's who he is.

And it's like.

No one would have cared.

No, yeah, no.

Before about that.

But now it's like,

yeah.

I thought it was a very good episode.

Left lots to discuss.

And I just want to say my favorite part of the episode that had my mouth watering was those cookies.

The chef.

I got to meet her.

I never wanted a cookie so badly in my life.

I didn't eat doughnuts with frosting.

They looked so amazing.

I love chefs.

Everyone ate them.

I love that.

Everyone ate them.

I hope they were so amazing.

I'm so glad that we saw them.

And I wonder if those were the cookies that Kim later saw and had a breakdown over that they were at the house in Tahoe.

Oh my God, 100%.

First of all.

Second of all, one last thing is I would love to get your thoughts because I didn't really know how to feel about that Sutton and Crystal conversation about the coat.

They kind of tied the episode up at the end because I was like, what happened?

We got it to be continued and then we never finished what happened.

And apparently Sutton walked in on crystal naked and instead of like leaving, she like went into the room, dropped the coat off and was like, I don't know what's going on here.

Yeah, it was really weird.

And it's like, I'm having an issue with this Sutton and Crystal thing because in so many ways I relate to each of them.

Like when Sutton was saying on the boat that she's really shy and so it's hard for her to like open up to people so it comes off sort of weird like i kind of can relate to that and also i can completely relate to crystal like having your best someone the truckers for crystal truckers for crystal if someone or the truckers for if someone who i was having weird tension with walked in on me naked i didn't immediately leave i would and then said i don't know what you're doing in here even though what sutton said overall there's nothing wrong with it but if you if you just like view it through this lens of i'm so uncomfortable i would be so uncomfortable it would give me such a pit so i completely understand why she was upset.

I don't think that Sutton did something wrong.

No,

she's just a weird girl.

I understand why Crystal just like felt really put off by that.

And wanted to like get the fuck out after that.

Yeah, and just

and then didn't bring it up and then realized how upset it had made her and that it was like part of the weirdness.

I totally got that.

Yeah.

I don't think that everyone would though.

No, like honestly, if somebody walks in on me naked, like even if I was having a problem with them, like I would feel weird, but then I would get over it.

Like I wouldn't, I don't think I I would be thinking about it the next day.

Oh, I'm not.

I'm just like very free with my tits and stuff.

I think I'd be thinking about it for the rest of my life.

100%.

100%.

I mean, there's a difference between walking on someone naked and walking in on them in the toilet.

And I think being walked in on the toilet is so much worse.

Well, that's why you close the door to the bathroom.

No, but like sometimes it just opens, you know what I mean?

I think I'd rather someone walk in on me on the toilet.

No, no, no.

Unless I'm wearing a romper that I had to remove.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, we still have more show because dear toasters from yesterday we postponed till today.

We're going to do, and we have not one, not two, two, but three updates for you today.

Beyond the toast.

Some of them are happy endings.

Some of them have further questions.

And we'll get into it.

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All right, let's dive into dear toasters.

I'm the Aussie toaster who wrote in at the beginning of the quarantine with do I marry my boyfriend for visa security and love dilemma?

Well, I took your advice and we got married with just 10 of our closest friends back in May 2020.

Now on to my next quandary.

We always intended to have one big wedding to celebrate with our friends and family from across the country and Australia at a later date.

But since COVID has gone on longer than anyone expected, it seems like this wouldn't be possible now until August 2023.

Australia has really strict travel restrictions and there's no guarantee that Australians would be able to leave the country anytime soon.

One big joint wedding seems like an impossible task.

So my question is, should I go through the stress and torture of planning two separate weddings next year for each side, one in the USA and one in Australia?

Australia.

Oh man, I'm so Australian.

Or should I just hold off, which would be three years after we actually got married, till I can have one big special event with both families and my three sisters by my side?

Or option three, save your money, enjoy being married.

Down the line, you'll have a celebration.

I wouldn't, I think I was going to say the same thing.

Like

to delay, I mean, obviously you're married and you'll start living as married people, but the idea of having a wedding in two years or even in a year when like you're just thoroughly married and it is what it is.

Like, I think if I were you, I would skip over it and I would put the money towards something else.

I agree.

And I know

I know that it seems like a really big deal now, but I just think this is something a lot of people are like kind of struggling with.

It's like you postpone your wedding and by the time you're able to actually do it, it's two years later.

You've already been married because you got like civilly married for whatever reason.

And then it's like you're going to spend all this money two years later when your life has already started.

Like put that money for like a down payment on a house or like a vacation.

I don't know.

I kind of feel like,

and of course, this is like easy for me to say when I got to have a wedding with no sort of complications like that.

But I think if it were me and it was three years later, I got married in 2020 and I couldn't celebrate till 2023.

I would not plan two weddings i would not oh my god planning one wedding that idea is eh

if you want to wait till 2023 do it i think that's the better idea but also

maybe think about if you can live without it and save your money and just start your life and like stop being pulled like tethered to this idea yeah i agree because i also think that mentally like thinking that you have a wedding your own wedding in two years is like you want to move forward with your life you know and and yes things didn't go according to plan but that's exciting too But again, it is easier said than done.

We did both get to, you know, have weddings untainted by COVID.

So

that's what I would do.

But of course, you never know if I was actually...

If you were in this situation, what would you do?

But that is what I think I would do.

All right, here's our next update.

Hi, Claudia and Jackie.

Oh, sorry, Jackie and Claudia.

I wanted to write in with an update for a while, but I've honestly been too embarrassed as the end result has even, has been even more humiliating than my original story.

So to refresh everyone's memory, I'm the girl who found her twin sister hooking up with my now ex-boyfriend last fall in a bathtub.

After they hooked up, they actually started dating.

Of course, I was disgusted by this and it obviously caused a strain on my relationship with my sister.

After many long discussions with her, I decided to just move on as she seemed very in love with him.

And at the end of the day, I do want my sister to be happy.

Also, my sister has had a ton of boyfriends and to be honest, I thought this would not last more than a few months.

So I decided it wouldn't be worth my energy to keep fighting, especially over this disgusting guy.

Well, my suspicions were actually wrong because they got fucking engaged.

So here's the next question at hand.

And honestly, it feels cosmic that this special deer toaster segment is going on.

Do I pull a speak now Taylor Swift wedding moment?

It's in two weeks.

My first logical thought is, no, don't do that, but they have both put me through hell.

Oh, and maybe this little factoid will help you make up your mind.

My ex-boyfriend texted me last week saying that he pretends that my sister is me.

I told him he's gross and to lose my number for good, but the way I know he's not lying is even more disturbing because when we all stayed at my parents' house for Memorial Day weekend, I overheard him and my sister fighting about it, presumably because she looked at his texts.

I don't know what I did to deserve these insane people in my life, but I'm lost at my next steps.

Please help again.

I was going to say, you have to run and tell your sister that he said that's you, but she knows.

And honestly,

they have made their bed.

Let them be miserable in it thinking about you together.

Yes.

But you should just, you think that she knows.

You think that she saw his text and that she saw that one.

You should tell her yourself.

Make sure that she knows exactly.

If you have any other anecdotes to share from when you guys were in a relationship or from the last year, share them then.

Do not get up in the middle of the wedding.

Oh my gosh.

But definitely, like, pull her aside, and in the kindest way, be like, I love you.

Whatever you decide, I'm here for you.

I will support this wedding.

Always be my sister.

I just need you to have all the facts and do with them what you will.

I'm not telling you to do one way or the other.

And just let, like, I think, and unless she's, like, super

crazy, um, hopefully she can, even if she decides to.

She's obviously even

their twin sister's boyfriend.

Even if she decides to still marry him, hopefully she'll be fine that, like, you guys had had this honest conversation.

Yeah.

But also it seems like your relationship with your sister is about to change and it's not going to be like a really close relationship.

Yeah, which sucks.

And like I'm always on the side of like we've got to do anything to salvage a sisterly relationship.

But like the relationship was pretty much unsalvageable when your boyfriend cheated on you with your fucking twin sister and then they ended up getting engaged.

Like that's so deplorable.

And also like, yes, salvage a relationship with your sister, but it's a two-way street and she doesn't really seem like an interested party.

And so at a certain point, like you don't want to just

be a fool.

No, this is is the weirdest thing ever no i agree give her all the facts say i'm not like telling you what to do just want to let you know that this happened before you get married and then you could sleep at night knowing that like they're miserable and you did all you could to make it and it's not too late it's not too late yet but you only have two weeks so and you probably wrote this a week ago um i do believe our final deer trusters has a happy ending so let's find out finally hey girls first thank you to claudia oh taylor's tracker was on the podcast when

this girl wrote in so thank you to claudia and taylor for your great advice on my situation your words of encouragement truly helped me.

A quick refresher.

Earlier this year, I found out that my brother and my boyfriend of over four years had drunken sex one night during our family gathering.

At the time, I decided to stay in my relationship and work through it.

As time went on, things just became really awkward.

We stopped having sex, barely spoke, and we no longer enjoyed each other's company.

We basically became roommates.

It goes without saying that we are no longer together, and I've been hearing things about him being spotted on dates with men.

I'm happy that he's coming to terms with who he is after all these years, but I can't say that the experience has now traumatized me and made me look at myself differently.

As for my brother, we haven't spoken much either.

It's just super weird.

I can't get past the visuals of them sneaking upstairs during my dad's 80th birthday party for an afternoon delight.

He and I did talk about the situation a little bit since I rode in, and his explanation was basically, we went upstairs to catch the tail end of the Celtics game and one thing led to another.

So weird, I know.

I'm still processing that one.

What was your advice to her?

Our advice was just like, of course, your own feelings are valid, but there's like bigger things going on here.

Like your boyfriend obviously like struggling with his sexuality since he's never spoken to you about like being bisexual or anything.

And I don't remember if her her brother was out, but I don't think that he was either.

So it was just like,

it's sad that like this happened, but there's also, and Taylor really gave like, from her own personal experience, a really more well-rounded like view because it's not really only about this girl, even though her feelings are super valid, just you want to be sensitive.

I understand.

Good news is that I just got the cutest apartment, adopted a puppy, and I'm ready for a hot girl summer like no other.

I feel like I have a new lease on life.

I'm like, I'm going to cry.

As a side note, your show gives me something nice to look forward to every morning and I couldn't be more grateful for that.

Thank you again and enjoy your summer.

Oh my God, that must have been really, really hard for you to grapple with.

But here's what.

We always try and look at the positive.

First of all, let's be happy for someone that you used to love finding themselves.

No matter what that means for you, they

could have, you know, never found the courage to do that.

So I think that's great.

Two, I think you should be happy that, you know, this didn't happen later on in life when you guys maybe got married or maybe had kids and it was more complicated.

You got to get out clean and smooth.

You got a new apartment and a puppy.

So I think there's a lot of benefits here.

Now, of course,

the thing with your brother sucks.

Like, I honestly, I don't know if I can give the proper advice, but at the end of the day, time heals all wounds.

Yeah.

And one day you'll be in a happy relationship and he'll be in a happy relationship and you will forget that this ever happened.

Yeah, no, sometimes things take time, maybe longer than you would like, but I'm sure you two will come back together.

Yeah.

I am.

So

happy for you.

And if you ever want to write into Deer Toasters, either with an update or a quandary yourself, deartoasters at gmail.com, you never know.

A A-list celebrity might just read it on air with you.

You never know.

That's our show.

Anything else you want to share?

No, that's it.

I'm really looking forward to seeing you guys tomorrow, which is Friday.

It's going to be so fantastic.

And I hope everyone has a great Thursday.

Acknowledge the space that you're in.

We're so close and just get her done, you know?

Yeah.

Thank you guys so much for listening to The Morning Shows, the Millennial Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So, if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

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Hope you guys have an amazing day.

We'll see you tomorrow for Friday, Friday.

Gotta get down on Friday.

Goodbye, goodbye.