New Era of Toast: Monday, January 27th, 2025

Good morning, millennials. Welcome back to The Toast and happy Monday that has truly never felt more like a Monday because today's a start.
It's a rebirth. As Ramona Singer would say, it's a renewal of sorts.
We are feeling ageless. We are feeling fresh.
We are feeling new. Hello, Jackie.
How are you? Hi, Turdy. Welcome to The Toast.
I feel like this is a real welcoming. This is a new era of toast.
Claudia moved to her new studio. And due to that, we did a total studio refresh at both studios.

So if you're listening as a podcast, you might want to head over to the video today for a

Pardgy treat because we are brand new.

Yeah.

Secret project reveal over the weekend.

Jackie and I both were hard at work doing absolutely nothing.

But having studios built for us, we literally look like we're in the palace of Versailles. I am so excited about this.
I can't believe we had like such a major change undergoing and we did not say one word about it to anyone. Like we were such secret keepers.
It's giving like, I don't know, it's giving, we can keep a secret. We were so low key.
We didn't even say secret project project like I feel like we really wanted people to be

excited and surprised by this so yes to put a bow on Friday's episode that's why I couldn't leave my house this weekend because starting Friday right after we wrapped the show people have been here around the clock setting up my new studio getting the lighting everything so I stayed home all weekend we had a variety of play dates people coming in and out of the house to keep it a fun weekend at home because I couldn't leave. And now you know when I, why, and I wasn't just being cagey.
No, this is truly a new era of toast. This is also our first sort of dry run with all of our new equipment.
So if today's episode actually makes it to air, like God is good. God is on our side.
We are going to be okay. Um, but we have new chairs and I'm first of all, so excited to see how this affects my coccidinia and my sciatica I have really high hopes I don't think there could have been a worse chair for me to be sitting in than our previous chair when it came to my tailbone issues and my physical therapist actually said that so while this technically was like an extravagant expense it's really a medical expense it is it's covered by insurance 1000% and it's covered by pet insurance because Brewery is feeling very at peace knowing that there is now space for him on.
It's really a couch. Like we have these big sofa chairs that can fit.
We could share one sometime, Turdolo, if you want to get cozy. Depending on like what stage of our like weight fluctuations we're at, we totally could share one.
We totally could. But now Bruno can be here comfortably.
And he's literally been sleeping next to me like the entire hour that we've been getting ready for the show and i feel like we needed to bring back the do to do spirit the spirit of the do be be bring back bruno bruno bing brack bring rack bruno yeah that's what i mean like that's what i've been saying b? Do you feel, like, nervous today? I feel like this is our first show ever. Like, I have, I haven't gotten, like, nervous for work in a very long time.
Not only do I feel nervous, for sure, I feel, like, a little awkward. I don't know why.
This just doesn't feel familiar to me yet, so I feel like I'm podcasting, like, in someone's house. Yeah, I feel this, the way that I, what I would feel if I was on, like, someone else's show.
Like, I feel like I'm really doing a podcast, not just, like, girl turdy on FaceTime we'll get to that level of comfortability but I'm glad we are acknowledging like I have like stage fright today yeah no it's kind of like when you and I podcast together in person after a really long time of remote podcasting and be like feel really weird making eye contact with one another and like the vibes are just weird um I'm feeling like a little bit of that awkwardness today because I'm just not used to my usual setup. Like usually I have you right here.
So I'm just readjusting, but I could not welcome this new era of toast more. I feel like the timing is perfect.
I love the vibes. I think a lot of people, there will be for sure like people making edits on social media, you know, rest in peace to the palm leaves because they were such an iconic part, an integral part of our brand for the last truly seven years.
Now, I don't feel like it has truly reflected who we are as human beings for a really long time. Having said that, people are attached to it and there's validity in those feelings.
So I just want to give a moment and hold space for people who might be missing those palm leaves today. Yeah, they were so good to us, but I'm excited to now like look at palm leaves and like look at that design and not be like, oh, I have to sit down and do work.
Like I can maybe go back to enjoying that aesthetic and that's exciting. But I welcome a new aesthetic.
It's Coombs Afresh. It's been a while since we've done like a total facelift and we've never done it as intentionally as this.
But I guess every time we move studios, the look changes. So you moving was meant to change the whole thing, which we've been talking about for a while so the timing really worked out but I am very excited I think these Parchi vibes like really reflect us as people because it's like very traditional and modern at the same time and that's how I would describe us very swirly as well and I can't really stress enough how like yes our show looks different but what's most different and I think what people will probably appreciate the most is we've really upgraded all of our equipment.

So when it comes to videos and audios, like we really spared no expense in giving everybody

the most premium experience when it comes to watching, listening, receiving the toast.

So I'm looking forward to way less tech issues because our last studio was truly built by

Jackie I and YouTube tutorials.

Like we made it as far as we could.

And Guitar Center.

Yeah, Guitar Center.

We made it as far as we could. And Guitar Center.
Yeah, Guitar Center. We made it as far as we could, like with our own free will and our, you know, wit and our scrappiness.
And this time we outsourced. I can confidently say I had no part in building this studio and that's how I know it's going to be great.
That's how it should be. We called in the big guns.
Yeah, I'm excited. Sort of like, you know, scrappyppy shitty element to like having that sort of jankiness on top of everything we do is so well actually Claude we're still gonna be those scrappy girls because like once they leave today they're never coming back and it's on us to learn how to use all of this and do everything post-show that we've always done so like we'll still be those girls don't worry we had a three-day break yeah we did it was so nice and we're coming back yeah this is like the least amount of effort I've always done.
So like, we'll still be those girls. Don't worry.
We had a three day break. Yeah, we did.
It was so nice. And we're coming back.
Yeah. This is like the least amount of effort I've ever exerted in a project.
And I have loved every minute of it. I really, really, truly feel like a star.
Also, of course we vlog the whole thing. So vlog is coming out on Patreon.
Claudia vlogged her half. I vlogged mine.
And I'm really excited to see yours too. It'll be like a dual vlog, which I love that.
We should do more of that. We should.
And we just, there's so much newness and different, because I'm also in like a completely different physical space. Jackie's in the same room, but we've just totally turned it upside down.
And I left behind a great deal of my past at that former studio. I didn't even realize like how much of a part the sirens played every day.
I think people who don't live in New York, like really felt like New Yorkers when listening to this podcast, like, you know, chasing ambulances and things like that. They also felt like they were being pulled over, which I'm happy for you guys that you hopefully will no longer feel that way.
My new studio has like one and a half windows. It faces an alley.
Like we're not going to be hearing anything. Um, and while that's obviously great for like an audio experience, it's not great for those people who really wanted to tune into the toast and feel like they were living in New York city for, you know,

feel like they were watching an episode of cops.

I'm going to miss the excitement. I really am.

Yeah.

And I didn't even realize how many people were going to miss the truckers for

Taysha. That was a chapter that I kind of forgot about.

I wonder how Taysha feels about the truckers for Taysha, but yeah, they were such a big part of the lore of the last studio. So we'll miss them too.
Wait, totally separate side. Did you see the Dumois update on Rachel Kirkennell and Matthew James and then Rachel Kirkennell's comment on it? Yeah, I've kind of been through a lot with it.
First, I saw that Dumois commented she had a blind item that like Matt and James were spotted together in the city. And I was like Matt and James James and I was like seriously I'm done with these two like they don't even know if they're together or not like I can't leave us out of it I can't just keep being invested in their story and then Rachel commented like no we weren't together so and she literally said wasn't me implying that he's like with another woman or I just think it's implying like this is or i think it's implying that like these are lies yeah no it oh you think there was like no spotting whatsoever oh yeah i guess like how do you mistake rachel kirkennell nobody looks like rachel kirkennell that's why she is rachel kirkennell yeah like if you know matt and james then you know what rachel kirkennell looks like it's giving elizabeth and and James yeah it is so I don't like I just that to me was a demerit in the Dumois column or so yeah yeah no it's definitely a crack at her credibility yeah like where's the accountability you got it wrong yeah yikes although the last time she did supply a Rachel and Matt blind item about Japan like it kind of blew the whole case wide I don't want to hear about Japan.
Maybe she got a little big for her bridges. I don't want to hear about Japan.
It's like it confuses the Rachel-Matt continuum. Yeah.
Who is Japan in this world? They're time travelers because they're in Japan together. They're also in London having pizza.
And they're also in America breaking up in three hours and posting on Instagram. And they're at Nima Colon.
So it's a lot. I just want to say I might be hearing like phantom things, but is your camera still recording? I just heard like a beep boop.
Yes and yes. The red light.
Okay. Just with this new studio, like I have to stay on top of it.
Just, I heard like a beep boop. It wasn't my beep boop.
It was a year. It wasn't mine either.
No, my beep boop was good. We're good.
Okay. Um, so we great stories today.
Actually, a lot happened over the weekend, especially with the football of it all yesterday. Especially with the football.
But I would be remiss, devastated, and heartbroken if I did not update everybody on my journey to watch all the movies that are nominated for the Oscars this year. I made so much headway this weekend.
And all that remains for me is The Brutalist. And that's because they refused to put it on some sort of streaming service.
And I'm not sitting in a movie theater for three hours, because while I love going to the movies, what I've realized is that I think I like the movie a lot less when I see it in theaters versus in the comfort of my own home. Like I was thinking about this the other day, me and Ben were recounting how many movies we've walked out of.
Like I have walked out of so many movies and I feel like if I was watching them at home, I would have finished them do you know what I mean interesting no I feel like you would have just turned it off but because a walkout is so much more serious you're like I walked out versus like oh I just went on my phone and let it play till the end I feel like I actually like movies more in theaters because I don't go on my phone and I really have to be sad for them but also I don't go to the movies often often. So when I go, I see something that I know I'm going to like.
Therefore, I like all of the movies that I see in theaters because it's like I'm choosing differently. So in theaters, Ben and I on Saturday saw A Complete Unknown, which is the Bob Dylan movie, Timothee Chalamet.
And I now understand, of course, why it's called A Complete Unknown. It's still a terrible.
Actually, when I was done movie i didn't understand why it was called that and then ben was explaining it to me and so let me say this ben really liked the movie ben happens to you know have very fond feelings about bob dylan because he grew up with a dad who loved bob dylan and i could that's so bruce like bruce loves that type of uh he loves uh billy joel he loves like these old Jewish men, you know, James, uh, Taylor, like it's so I could see Ben. So Ben was like, I loved it.
And he was like, I know you hated it. I didn't say one word during the whole movie.
I was counting down the minutes. I really didn't like it.
And I'm not sure if it's because one, the movie was bad to, and I guess I'm just sort of like putting this together. Like I don't like bob dylan like i don't know his music even like his biggest i knew one song from the whole movie the answer my friend sir my friend and the whole movie is like about how he hates that song you know and so all i really know about bob dylan is what timothy chalamet portrayed to me and so i feel like that's unfair because timothy chalamet made him into the most unlikable human being on the planet.
And I don't know what prosthetics or anything. They made him so physically unattractive that I was looking at pictures of Bob Dylan.
I'm like, oh, he was a major cutie. No, Timothee Chalamet as Bob Dylan was like full-blown uggo, really ugly.
Like, I don't know what these prosthetics were because I was shocked to see like young hot pictures of him. I'm like i can understand how we like swept the nation he was a cutie yeah um also bob dylan is like a huge jew okay you would never know from the movie like there was one scene where like he got a piece of mail that said robert zimmerman and his girlfriend was like is that your name and that was literally it so it's like is he hiding his jewish identity so i'm like oh is he a self-hating jew then i went on like did some research oh the man loves judaism wrote this beautiful song neighborhood bully about israel in the 80s like he's been he's been knowing about it no so i was like where is his identity it was just i feel like as somebody who knew nothing nothing about bob dylan i still know nothing the movie taught me nothing everybody in the theater was like an older person who probably like knew a lot of the context I did not um he just kind of looked like an ass okay maybe he is an ass like no that's not the vibe I was getting on google oh okay I can't add just like you I have no point of reference for Bob Dylan I can't add anything to this conversation I know and then at the movie, they had like, you know, classic black and white text with like all of his accomplishments and how like much of a, like a thoughtful and also cause driven person he was.
I'm like, that was not Timothy. Timothy was just a dick.
Like all these things. I'm like, that does not add up with the person you just portrayed in this movie.
Like he won a Nobel peace prize. He, um, like was really like passionate about social causes.
I'm like this in the movie, he was passionate about nothing except smoking cigarettes. It was really just, I didn't like it.
But having said that, I don't know if that's a universal truth. I think Ben liked it.
I think a lot of the people around me were cackling. I was just not feeling it at all.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to watch a movie about some random guy off the street either. I don't know him.
Yeah, it was even guy on the street know her like yeah yeah 100 but then that led me I was like making progress I'm like wow I only have like two more movies that I want to see you told me you saw it and I'm like Claudia you need to watch Amelia Perez because we talk about it all the time you're watching the Oscar movies it's the most nominated like I'm sorry you have to watch it if you want it really to be taken seriously and there's so much discourse around it that I absolutely I had to and Ben didn't know what it was about and I kind of like tricked him into watching it because he wanted to look up what it was about and I was like no I really wanted him to be completely surprised that's also the best anyway yeah and it's such like a sort of outlandish concept for a film that I thought he would really enjoy the surprise so let me tell you we watched Emilia Perez and like by no stretch of the imagination is it a good movie like I would never recommend it it's really it's almost satirically bad especially the elements of the musical and I watched the whole movie which felt like 10 movies in one like it was this weird stupid musical it was this story of gender identity but like very quickly that ends like the drug lord become like transitions in the first 20 minutes it's a two-hour movie like it's actually not about that at all it it's five different movies in one it's about the sex change it's about her new life it's about the organization and then it's about her new life. It's about the organization.
And then it's like a hostage movie. It is seriously the most aimless, pointless movie because when, and I'm telling Ben as we're watching, I'm like, no, I mean, and this is like a story that really shook Mexican culture at the time.
And I'm like, I'm explaining like how crazy it was. And then I wanted to wait till I was done with the movie to like research what parts of the movie were real, what parts of the movie were like fictionalized.
And I come to find out that the entire movie is fiction. Like this is not a true story.
Yeah. I don't know why you were under the impression that it was a true story.
You had said stuff like that on the show. Like I think because the Tostadas were really offended by it and you were getting the idea that like,

why choose this story to tell as if it was a true story out of so many other true stories.

But that was just like a leap that you had made.

So after like upon finding out that the whole thing was fake,

I really felt like almost annoyed that I wasted my time.

Like I learned nothing from this movie.

And then I was reading a lot of the feedback and why it's overwhelmingly negative like it's a movie that's beloved by critics but despised by both like the Mexican community and the trans community it's like this is our story no it's not and then Mexico's like are you guys kidding me like you never make movies about our culture and the one that you do is like really highlighting the worst parts of Mexican culture that's really not not emblematic of like Mexico. And that's like drug cartels.
It's all about like these missing, these people who go missing, all about violence and crime and drugs. And it's like, really, that's what you're putting out there.
So everyone's mad for their own reasons. And I'm mad because I wasted two and a half hours of my fucking time.
Why does it have 13 nominations? Like who wants this? I'll tell you why. I'll tell you you why because they literally like created a movie to check a million boxes in the oscar category like that's why they made it a musical like so it could be nominated in score they literally were just like doing rent because the movie felt seriously just like a hodgepodge of crapola like i don't even know what i was watching half the time you know what it feels like it feels like if you ask ai like write me a script for a movie that will win all of the Oscars.
And then they start checking off all of these buckets that the Oscars care about. And obviously the Vaginoplasty song was the highlight of the film for me.
And Ben literally was like, oh, this is what you've been singing all week. I'm like, yeah, sex change operation.
But there were so many songs, Jackie, and they were all just like that they were like either in spanish or english and the way and i know this is what musicals are like we're having a conversation then i start to sing but it was highlighted so i never think in a musical it's weird that that person's singing right yeah i'm like yay the song is here and amelia prez i'm like why are you singing like it was so wrong like none of it added up and let me tell you in the beginning of the movie when she's looking for a doctor who can like do the operation but also protect the identity of this person it's a very high profile drug cartel lord um she travels around the world looking for like the best doctors and she ends up in tel aviv and i was like no way is this movie taking me to israel like that's what i mean like you never knew what was going to throw out at you next. And they ended up going with Dr.
Wasserman, the Jewish doctor from Israel, who, you know, we'll keep your secret. Kept the secret.
Like, the movie just kept going. Right turn, left turn, left turn, right turn.
Like, you just, I can't even tell you what the movie was about. Why you got to bring the Jews into it.
Yeah, no, it was just was just like we have our own problems and this terrible movie like we really don't we don't need it's a narrative we wish to be excluded from one in which we never asked to be a part of it was actually embarrassing for the well-known actors to participate in this movie like zoe and it's crazy because like zoe sell down is winning so she doesn't look at this project as like no as a stain no but the dancing and the singing and just like the crazy dialogue um what was ben's reaction when selena gomez says that line oh my god and she says it in spanish so it obviously like hits different because you're reading the subtitles but she essentially is like talking to man and she's like, my pussy hasn't stopped the robbing since I last saw you.

And she says it in Spanish.

And he was like,

whoa,

that's what I mean.

Like,

and it was Jackie,

it was so unnecessary.

Like the guy that she was on the phone with is like an old lover,

old boyfriend.

They get back together.

Like it's,

it's literally,

it wasn't even like a crazy type of relationship.

They just like kept doing such crazy things for the sake of what? Absurdity. Like the theme of the film was absurdity.
Nothing was cohesive. Nothing made sense.
It was seriously, by the end, I was getting so fatigued by the plot twist. Cause by the end, it's like a, it's a movie about like a hostage and you know, they have to get the hostage back.
And I'm like, how the fuck did we get here? It was seriously seriously the biggest waste of my time especially knowing that it was not actually based on true events and I don't know like what led me there and I'm surprised because people are always so quick to correct me like when I make things up and the comments and I didn't see one person say that Amelia Perez was not based on a true story that's because no one's seen it so they couldn't correct you because they didn't know correct Correct. Correct.
So things I did, that.

Things I wish I didn't do, also that.

And the only thing I have left is the brutalist.

And if anybody could give me like some tea on whether or not it's going to be on a streamer anytime soon, that would be enormously helpful.

Also, when I went to the movie theaters, I got into a fight with an old lady.

Oh, my God.

Turdy.

I was walking out of the bathroom at the end of the movie.

And there's one door into the bathroom and one door out. So she was coming in.
I out we just like clashed she was like an old lady with a cane so I was like oh my god I'm so sorry and I obviously moved away and let her walk through and she like rolled her eyes at me so hard like I was doing such like I didn't do anything wrong I was just leaving while you were entering it's just unfortunate that there's like things happen doors open I guess normally like under certain circumstances like a lady with a cane like obviously I would never be disrespectful to but like bitch I'm pregnant now so like we're in the same boat like we're both not well so I literally was like you're gonna be fine like I got I what did I do I went out of the way I said oh my gosh I'm so sorry even though I didn't do anything wrong we just collided like very naturally I did nothing wrong so I'm so sorry please and then I moved out of the way for her and her cane to come through and she's like shaking her head rolling her eyes and honestly like sorry i don't care who the fuck you are you're a bitch you're a bitch it's timeless i totally agree that's so crazy like i'm just so sick of letting these people what because you're geriatric no and by the way normally i would but now i'm like i'm checking a box like i'm also like i deserve yeah you know uh doors open for me i'm pregnant so you want to play with me you want to play with me lady so what'd you do did you hit her no i just said you're gonna be fine and i'm 90 sure she didn't even hear me of course she didn't like she was probably down the hallway and you're like to finally come back with your comeback she was right next to me but she was. A normal person would have heard me a thousand percent.
Because she didn't even react. And you know, she was the type of bitch like who would have reacted if she heard me.
Damn. Well, that's really awkward.
No, it wasn't. It kind of felt good.
Okay. Well, I read this weekend.
Finally. Oh, I saw your story.
So I read The Goddess of Warsaw, which is like a historical fiction book that I actually wish I picked it for the redheads. And oh my gosh, I posted like that.
I loved it so much. I just like had a couple notes.
And the author DMed me. She's like, what are your notes? Oh my God, that's seriously the worst part of being as successful as we are, especially in the literary space.
Like roasting a book on your story. Sometimes you'll like really hate it.
Her message was really nice. And the thing is, I didn't roast the book at all.
Like I said, I loved it. Highly recommend I had a couple notes I had a couple notes and by notes I meant like thoughts but like of course I have a couple thoughts I just read a whole book about the holocaust my and it's also like you have notes who the fuck do you think you are so she was like what are your notes I would love to answer some questions I was like no I just meant like my note is that I loved the historic it was like historical and then also modern day and the historical piece so it's actually about the Warsaw ghetto uprising in Poland which I learned about like back in the day but I I needed a refresher because it's such a it's such a crazy story it's like tragic but it's also like Masada these just like heroic tragic stories um it's you're choosing not like if you die but how you die and with dignity um so I loved when like that part of the book and then eventually that part ends and then we go into the future.
And I just really enjoyed that part more. So that was like my note.
And I was like, no, I just like love that. And I just wish there was more of that.
But the book was amazing. And I do wish that I chose it for the redheads.
But you should still read it if you are interested. And also today's Holocaust Remembrance Day.
It is. A great opportunity to donate to the Mark Schoenwetter Holocaust Education Foundation, mshef.org.
Or read a book if you'd like to broaden your knowledge. There are so many stories, so many tragic stories.
And also what I liked about this book is that it was a historical fictional take but it brought in a lot of like true things that happened and I learned so many like just remember when you were reading that story I think Sophie's Choice and you like learned about like things that happened that you didn't know just like small moments or people um there was a lot of that just characters and events that I didn't know about that she brought like true things into it so I learned a lot about um that time that way and it if you do want to learn like historical fiction makes the reading like easy it's not like you're reading a big non-fiction history book but you get a lot out of it yeah so it was actually the perfect thing because I just had said I wanted to read things with more heft and it was definitely hefty. So well, shout out for Holocaust Memorial.
I feel like, um, people are always asking like, you know, what, what to do and reading a book is great advice. I also feel like check today specifically like a local JCC or like a Hillel, a Chabad.
Cause I think that, um, a lot of them put on programs like of having Holocaust survivors come and tell their stories and, you know, we're less than a hundred years out from the Holocaust, but like we're getting there. And so we're the last generation of people who will be able to like hear firsthand experiences from people who lived through it, people like Mark, but there are, you know, quite a few left.
Most of them live in Israel, but a lot of them live in America. And so they, and a lot of them go around and do like speaking gigs.
They answer questions. They just tell their stories.
And it's like so powerful. If you've never met a Holocaust survivor in person or had the opportunity to hear hear them speak it's literally the biggest privilege in the world so just like check your local jcc or something you know yeah yeah definitely i feel like they'd be doing that today yeah so that's always a good reminder and last thing just you know taking a sharp right turn everyone just ignore me um lots of people want to know update on our theme song competition have we chosen a winner what's the status so Jackie and I have chosen a winner we are in communicado with the winner um the winner is you know working on signing some paperwork and then the winner will fork over the song and Jackie and I will get in the studio so I don't know if we're gonna share until we have our own version what do you think like should we share like the winning version on our instagram no i think that we should wait so it's a nice big exciting reveal and yeah i'm very excited about that gotta get on the studio do my vocal warm-ups there's just so much change happening here like it's so funny we do nothing we literally change nothing for years then in one week we have like a whole new song a whole new studio a whole new life.
When it rains, it's so funny. We do nothing.
We literally change nothing for years. Then in one week we have like a whole new song, a whole new studio, a whole new life.
And when it rains, of course. Yeah, I completely agree.
How are you feeling about all the change pulse check? Cause I know you're not like a change friendly sort of gal person. I'm actually with this, this particular set of changes.
Like I'm really comfortable with it. You guys know how, like I had so many problems with my old studio.
This new one is just closer to my house. The bathroom's cleaner.
Like everything about it is better. So I'm feeling okay.
Like I'm getting rid of the good morning millennials, which is like going to be like a big thing for us and replacing it with a theme song that I'm having like a little bit more, you know, second thoughts about, cause it's just, it's hard to create these sort of iconic moments that people come to love and expect and know. And we're're just doing away with one it feels wasteful I don't know I don't know I don't know yeah but evolution evolve or die evolve or die so that's that's what brings us to today that is what brings us to today also just so much to discuss Taylor on the field Travis is going to the Super Bowl yeah Mars has a new song that really taking the world by store.
Big football news. We'll do football at the top of the stories.
So in order to recap last night and the puff pastry hot dogs that I made, let me tell you, they were so damn good. I'm cracking up because you and Ben called me and they like thought that I stole Ben's idea to make an Ina puff pastry.
Yeah. Ben had just made a video of him recreating an Ina garden recipe using puff pastry and mustard that he saw on Ina garden when we were watching back to basics barefoot contessa.
And then, you know, one week later, my sister is making a puff pastry Ina dish using mustard from her Ina cookbook. So we, we didn't accuse, we just thought like maybe she sought inspiration.
So we just called and asked, but then we realized we came together and we turned on Ina and we're like, oh, she has one trick. And it was in her cookbook and it was in her show.
Because there's multiple recipes. I had my eye on that recipe in that cookbook for like two years, but I never made it.
And then I was like, I wanted pigs in a blank. And I was like, oh, yeah, that Ina recipe.
And it's in her cookbook and it's on her show. But honestly, painting on some Grey Poupon on puff pastry, chef's kiss.
She is right for that. Let me say something about Ina.
And I feel like maybe it's in her cookbook and it's on her show but honestly painting on some gray poupon on puff pastry chef's kiss she is right for that let me say something about Ina and I feel like maybe it's unfair to say it just about Ina I think it's any are you gonna drag her by her hair I'm not because her hair is not long enough for that but what I'm gonna say is and I think that if you were to watch any because me and Ben just got like obsessed with Ina her show was on max we must have watched in the last two weeks, like 25 episodes of her show. It's short, it's 25.
And so you just watch a lot of her. So I don't think it's specific to her.
I think you would find this with any chef, but like, like she's kind of quirky. Like I feel like her food actually just tastes good cause it's all butter and salt.
Like that's it. Anything is good.
If you put a whole stick of butter and a gallon of salt in it, she garnishes everything with more salt. And that's like her catchphrase.
She's like a little bit more salt because you can never have enough. Actually, you can.
It's called high cholesterol. Like she's just sort of like, I don't know.
I feel like is her food good or is it just the butter? Well, I will say everything that I've made from one of her cookbooks has been good and I don't go for like the butter heavy recipes but last night's hot dog in puff pre-she was extremely decadent like I had a two-thirds of one and that was as much as I could have but it was it was a special treat for sure of course of course but it was really just saying really and I don't think it's specific to Ina I'm critical of her. I'm just, even though I feel like a lot of people think me and Ina have beef because I made fun of her like memoir so endlessly and my husband's in love with her.
You and Ina do have beef. Why wouldn't I dislike her? I was talking about her yesterday.
I had people over, not to rub it in. And we were talking about Ina and I forget what we were saying, but it came up like your thoughts like on her and how like you literally dragged her to filth the last time we talk about it.
Every time we talk about her, like every time I try to be like her memoir is exciting. Well, it's a bad name, first of all.
And second of all, I think ever since Martha Stewart like said that thing about Ina not fucking with her after going to prison, I just realized like that's Ina's not the type of girl I would ever be friends with. She's not the girl you thought she was.
She's not the girl I thought she was. And that's not my thought she was and that's not my fault that's ina's fault i agree great great now without further ado ado ado ado ado it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know and the fast five stories that you need to know are brought to you by the flip-off we've got something super exciting to talk about the premiere of hgtv's buzzy new series the flip-off and trust us as experts on the matter of tarik el-moussa you do not want to miss this one christina hack and tarik were married you guys know they're the king and queen of flipping shows and then they got divorced but now after 10 years of history and drama and a couple of new marriages these exes are ready to face off to prove who's the best flipper around in the flip-off it's tarik and his new wife as we all know heather ray el-moussa flipping against Christina, and their goal is to flip a house with the biggest payoff.
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So we're going to see Christina and her soon-to-be ex-husband, throwback to Josh Hall, in a really intense exchange on to the flip it's really awkward and then Christina then opens up to Tarek about the troubles in her marriage so the drama is real but the heart of the series is really the transformations Christina and Heather's designs and I for style really elevate the new series with high design that you don't see anywhere their mastery as real estate experts flippers and entrepreneurs is on full display they spent years honing their crafts, and it really shows. And did we mention special guest appearances? Each week, notable celebrities like Amanza from Selling Sunset, Heather Dubrow from Orange County Housewives, Tarek and Christina's mom, and the most surprising, Christina's second husband, TV star Ant Anstead is also premiering.
Excuse me, guesting on the show. Ant Anstead.
And they will compete. They will be judges to compete.
So mark your calendars. The Flip-Off Must Watch TV is premiering Wednesday, January 29 on the show and they will compete they will be judges to compete so mark your calendars the flip off must watch tv is premiering wednesday january 29th at 8 7 central to see who wins with the first of its kind competition you don't want to miss it today's episode is also brought to you by thrive cosmetics so whether you like fresh faced full glam or somewhere in between you've probably seen thrive cosmetics viral tubing mascara you know the one in the turquoise tube all over your social media when you're watching Turdy Get Ready.

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Sorry. Don't come for me, fans.
Like it was not giving commanders. It was giving, it was giving the Washington, you know what? I don't want to come for like, it's giving, I'll say it.
I'll say it. It was giving the Washington losers.
Like my God, ever heard of catching a ball? Yeah. It was really bad.
They lost by like 25 points. But like the commanders were never going to the Super Bowl.
Like I feel like could have called that but you good luck telling their fans that last week no like the team named commanders they don't even know who they are it doesn't elicit that sort of like super bowl energy it really doesn't so they're not going to the super bowl like as you would think and the chiefs did beat the bills which after the eagles beat the commanders i was by the way I didn't watch a lick of either game but I was then like hoping for the Bills to win more even though typically I wouldn't have cared just to like do something different Eagles v Bills yep so I watched both games in full the birds are fighting it was clear from day one like minute one that the Bill the Eagles were going to be winning that game so it was like okay who are the Eagles going going to play and i also was rooting for the bills one just to change it up and two because i heard a statistic about the bills that ben told me that actually made me like want to cry for them like they deserve it okay first of all they have never won a super bowl which is just kind of crazy like they had oj you know they're like not like a losery unknown team like they're always like making waves but they have been three times or maybe even four Jackie they went in 1990 91 92 93 and they lost every single time and then this would have been their chance to go and they're not even getting to go because I also feel like getting to go is really major even if you don't win like obviously winning the Super Bowl goals but like getting to play at the Super Bowl is a goal as well huge um so yeah by then i was sort of rooting for the bills but like the chiefs these days like they're just the patriots like they are just that team they are the best team they're not like winning by chance at this point the greatest in the league and i i'm happy for the eagles to have another shot at the chiefs i feel like they wanted the chiefs to win so that they can like have that moment. I feel like they might even let JC, Jason Kelsey play in the game or be on the sidelines.
But the thing is, and sorry, like don't come for me, Eagles fans. Cause I respect you.
And I, and I, like, I understand your desire, but based on just what I know, like, it's not even a question. The chiefs are going to win again.
Cause look at like the games they played last night. And that's what I don't like about these two divisions two divisions because i feel like based on merit the super bowl should have been the chiefs and the bills like they were the best teams in the league this year so the fact that like the bills don't even get to go kind of sucks and like i think that if the eagles played the bills they would have lost do you know what i mean yes i do know what you mean and so odds are they're rolling into rolling into the Super Bowl, having played, no offense, Washington, like this

big team of losers, like who seriously could have got arrested if they tried.

And like, yeah, they won by so many points.

It's like not impressive.

Like if I played a preschooler, yeah, I would win also.

So I think that like they are coming in like thinking they're hot shit.

And the Chiefs like the Chiefs played the Bills.

Like they earned hard.

It was a three game, three point game.

Like they earned it last night.

So I feel like it's not even a question of who's going to win.

And I just want to say like no hate to anyone involved.

I'm so bored.

I'm so bored.

I don't know. game three-point game like they earned it last night so I feel like it's not even a question of who's gonna win and I just want to say like no hate to anyone involved I'm so bored I'm so bored like how many times have I seen the Eagles play the Chiefs like a thousand times like give me someone new and I understand that's how it works like when you're building dynasties it's like I get it I get it but just as a consumer who's like purely showing up for entertainment purposes like I am bored I agree I think odds are the Chiefs will win like based on stats and skill but like sometimes people have an off game and sometimes people have this team doesn't sorry they literally don't someone could get injured god forbid you know i don't want that to happen but sometimes like sometimes the juju is off and that's what the eagles have to hope for they have built in contingency plans because i feel like earlier in the year travis was kind of stinking it up and they like kept winning because they have such a good team.
They have other alternates. Like they're stacked.
They have, you know, plans in place for these kinds of things, for injuries and lack of juju. And I also want to say, so not only do they need lack of juju, the Eagles want it more.
Yes. And that maybe for that reason, they could win.
Like they are the underdog. What does Jason Kelsey say? Hungry dogs going to eat.
Like they might win because of that. Because they're hungry.
They might. They're hungry.
Hungry dogs. I just, I think I've seen this film before.
And I don't know. It's just not hitting in the way that it did the first time around.
Like I loved seeing Taylor on the field. Right.
But it wasn't as crazy. It's just like she belongs there now, you know? Yeah.
She belongs with me. It's like girl get down there.
Even the last time we were like we were like there's no way she's gonna be on the field and then she went. So like I don't know I just I was like hoping for something new.
Maybe like Kayleigh Steinfeld's on the field you know? Yeah. Was she at the game last night? Did you see her? I don't know.
I went to her social media and she like doesn't post as like a wag ever. Yeah.
Her social is extremely business promotional, which I really respect. She is this global superstar, but not even on her stories, like wearing a, an off season puffer from Kristen use check.
Like I saw none of it. Yeah.
But I feel like she was definitely there as the fiance. I don't think anything called her away, but yeah, she's pretty low key.
She is. So I don't even know if we would have seen her on the field i feel like we would have and we were robbed of that but it is exciting like for the girlies lur will be at the super bowl like who's gonna be in the box with her this whole thing again but yes we have seen this film before but we liked the movie so the movie that we liked got a sequel a sequel i read a statistic that was like taylor's been to 22 chiefs games and they've won 19 of them that's just like so crazy yeah jessica simpson is like crying when she read that a thousand percent like she whatever the opposite experience of jessica that jessica had taylor's currently having yes but i also think like taylor goes to all the home games and don't people just statistically win more home games yeah that's true she does go to a lot not to say that she's not his good luck charm of course and everyone wants to play better when lorries in the room it's definitely intimidating and they are also just like a dynasty they're just a good team she picked like a maybe she dates travis because he's on the best team and that's why the best team keeps winning because it's the best it would have been impressive if she like started dating someone from the cleveland browns and all of a sudden they're at the super bowl you know like that's impressive yeah she's just like you know shooting fish in a barrel yeah no but Travis only got a date with her because he's on the best team she wasn't dating someone from the Jets right right not to bring the Jets into this they've been through a lot I'm just bringing everyone into it so people can't say like Charity you're so mean to like the Detroit fans'm bitch I'm mean to everyone and also I think you're mean to all the fans of the NFL because they're all crazy they're all so crazy and it's also funny they're all the elk of crazy people like in a different way than other crazy people but like people get so bent out of shape although I will say because I do think like a lot of the times people's reactions are so crazy I did last night like I did really feel for the Bills fans mostly because like I love Josh Allen um I really relate to somebody with old tweets and I just I love him and I think he's really sweet and I think he like works really hard and he does all that he can he didn't mess up you know like I just want to say i'm not a football expert but i know that there's like a group of people whose job it is to protect the quarterback and they had obviously like lost their vision or something they because they were just doing a terrible job last day like he did all that he could nobody had like one big error i felt bad for them they played they fought hard they played a good game and isn't that sometimes worse than just like losing by a ton and like you never stood a chance? Like you were this close.
Is Bruno choking? Is he okay? Oh, classic Broody. This close.
What is it? Lambo? No, that's something else. Lombardi.
Lombardi. They don't get Lamborghinis when they win the Super Bowl.
No, no. Lambo Field is the Packers.
And the Lombardi Trophy is the big football that they get if they win the Super Bowl. And Travis saying again, he said, he's saying, do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight.
That's what I'm saying. Like everything is just like kind of giving repetitive.
I literally, I gasped when he did that. Yeah, because nobody, nobody like recalled back to him.
He said, do a little dance, make a little love.

And then he basically gave the microphone to the crowd to say, get down tonight.

And they didn't realize what was happening.

So it was like, get down tonight.

It was just like a little awkward.

Yeah.

And it's just, I always forget that that's his personality.

I know.

Because he's so serious on the field. Like, except when he's, you know, doing his end game, end zone dance.

Yeah.

I want to be an end game.

Well, that's our Super Bowl two weeks.

The big game.

Mm-hmm.

We'll see who it's going to be.

Though, at this point, like, I don't care so much.

Yeah, no, at this point, I kind of know.

And Chiefs v. Eagles was really fun when it was Brothers Bowl.

The Kelsey Bowl.

Brothers Bowl.

Yeah.

Without Jason, it doesn't hit the same. Agreed.
Hashtag bring back my Jason. Are you ready for our next story? Mm-hmm.
How quickly they forget. Where's my transition? Ooh, yeah.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star, Erika Jayne's son, Tommy Rizzo, Tommy Zizzo Jr., testifies testifies at asap rocky's trial so yeah this is really just a who's who of hollywood and showing what a small town it can be it's so true it's so random and i think when people read the headline you're like what but then you hear the facts it's like actually not that crazy yeah thomas zizzo jr an la police officer and son of erica jane people don't realize because he's on the show, but she has a son and he is a police officer in L.A. And he took his last name is not Jade or Girardi.
So you would never know that they're related. It's Zizzo.
He took the stand on Friday during day one of ASAP Rocky's trial, TMZ reported. ASAP faces two counts of assault with a semi-automatic firearm related to a 2021 shooting incident in Hollywood.
He is accused of firing two or three shots at Terrell Efron, a childhood friend. According to the AP, Efron claims the alleged shots grazed his knuckles.
The rapper has pleaded not guilty and he faces up to 24 years in prison if convicted. The officer Zizzo was one of the first LAPD officers to respond to the scene of the alleged 2021 incident.
While on the stand, he testified about what he saw at the scene when he arrived. Okay, so yeah, he was just like a cop, a part of a trial.
Like cops do trials all the time. It just so happens that this is a high profile trial.
And that the person, you know, on the stand has a wife who's obsessed with housewives. I was that's the funny part.
And people were like, I wonder if Bad Gal Riri still follows Erica on Instagram. She does.
I don't even, I feel like she probably wouldn't have put this together until the internet did. It's so random.
It's true. I don't think she would have put it together.
How could she? Unless someone had told her, like, but who would even, who would know such a thing? So yeah, I don't see how this like changes anything of Rihanna Stanhood. Like he's just doing his job and.
Do you think that ASAP's lawyer could use this as like some sort of leverage to like for a mistrial? Like it's not a conflict of interest in any way, but like a lawyer maybe could spin it like that. No i think in hollywood like the odds that two people in a trial have a connection to fame are not crazy yeah yeah the judge has seen it before but i guess then like if anybody on the trials i mean on the jury is like a huge fan of housewives like they would have to recuse themselves perhaps but they won't know that they can't like consume content about this trial so i don't think they would know this right right it's also kind of like low-key no one's talking about asap rocky like being on trial for like kind of egregious crimes right i didn't realize that it doesn't add up it doesn't add up like i don't know it's giving it's giving he's framed like what i know about him from you know being r him from, you know, being Rihanna's, you know, boyfriend, being

happy to play second fiddle to her.

He's a supportive partner and a doting father and husband partner.

Yeah.

Right.

People who are like supportive partners and like let the women in their lives make way

more money than them and like are so proud of them.

They just don't go around shooting people.

They just don't.

They don't shoot their childhood friends.

No, they don't.

Like it's just, it's incongruous with the man that I've sort of become come to know yeah so i'm on his side we're now on watch for this trial because also for two reasons now right of course it would have been regardless that's the thing about bravo it is like connected to everything it's just there's always a bravo connection uh katie perry suing the 1-800 flowers guy it turns out to be cameron westcott's father-in-law like it's just it's crazy yes but i also think it's because the housewives are notable people or their families are notable like that's why they're housewives because they are yeah connected oh speaking of housewives did you see boz from uh boz excuse me from real housewives of beverly hills Hills had a birthday party in New York and Dorit flew from LA to be there. Like all the rony women were there.
She was like posting and then she was like, my girl Dorit flew in from LA. Oh, so cute.
I was like, oh, these two are like real friends. No, I didn't see that.
Why'd she have it in New York? I don't know. Maybe she has like a lot of friends in New York or she just happened to have been in New York.
But Dorit flew and they like were posting such cute pictures. Love.
Love. No, I'm obsessed obsessed with their friendship apparently when I asked last week if who was on watch what happens live apparently it was Bose and Dorit was in the audience and or their best friends yeah I don't know if Dorit was in the audience wait but she was saying that she was defending Dorit like at every turn like I would have loved it so now I gotta go watch I have them all recorded yeah no I'm telling you I had a good feeling about her when she showed up and it's nice to be right finally about something.
Oh my God. Speaking of not being right about something and I'm not saying that we're not right, but like things are taking a turn with Justin Baldoni.
Do you find? Did you see the video of Justin Baldoni on the beach at TMZ? Like back grid, um, got like a video of him playing with his kids in the ocean. Like he's on vacation in Hawaii.
No, I saw that he was on vacation. anybody like going into the ocean to like frolic it's so unattractive like there's no cool way

especially like the really choppy Hawaii waters like there's no attractive cool way to like dive into the ocean but he like does this jump as like a wave is like pulling out and he literally just like hits the deck like it's on TMZ's Instagram highly recommend watching it just made me giggle but yes I agree things are not looking good for blake lively and those who defended her having said that i still haven't changed my mind i'm just like being quiet about it because i'm really not in the mood to deal with it but yeah they were just subpoenaed to turn over all their personal text messages ryan and blake right and that regardless of how it plays out in a legal sense of like what um the crimes the crimes it's not going to be good however you talk to your husband about your co-worker that you don't like oh my god it's not going to look good from like a public perception sort of thing so when I saw that I was like this is going to be really bad I also just feel like you also know she texts weird with her Khaleesi right right no like it's not going to be good and it's not going to look good for her. And I feel like a lot of people are really turning.
And now that the case has turned like criminal, not criminal, but not no longer civil where it's like, really, they're going to trial. Like I think things are starting to look really bad.
I know. I'm like kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
All this stuff has happened. She hasn't responded at all, like legally or like, so so I'm feeling like does she have this big thing in her arsenal that's going to end it or is she just like rolling over and taking it also I thought there was like some sort of law against I know you can't you don't have to testify against a spouse legally if you're married like that is a protected thing so I'm shocked to find that like you would have to fork over like under what grounds would I ever have to give my text messages with my husband you know what I mean yeah it's so it's kind of egregious like even for anyone like you I don't know I I'm not understanding the legality of it I'm sure they're like if the judge said they have to do it that there's a reason but I feel like it's I've never heard of never heard of that.
Yeah. No, that's why when I saw that, I was like, well, damn, that's, there's no way those are going to be good.
They're screwed. They're screwed.
They're screwed. Even if it doesn't prove anything in a court of law, just like seeing them look good.
Reading two people who are like in a marriage of, you know, multiple years, seeing their communication is going going to be crazy but two people of notable fame and wealth and lots of connected friends and just who we've gotten a window into how like Blake speaks and it's weird um like I I'm just thinking about like if anybody ever read my text messages with Ben the other day I thought he finished the cream cheese I was standing in the fridge writing probably the nastiest text message I've ever sent to anyone because it's like I know Ben likes cream cheese but I'm the one who's been stocking up on cream cheese because no you go through a lot of every morning yeah yes I have a bagel every single morning and honestly when you have a bagel every morning you go through it like a thing of cream cheese like after like seven days so when Ben eats it and finishes it like you leave me without cream cheese like at least tell I'll buy more. So I was writing such an, I'm like the fact that you would disrespect me.
I was really being so crazy. And thank God right before I sent it, I saw the cream cheese was right in front of me.
But like, that's just how, you know, married people talk. No, it's going to be crazy to see how they talk about Justin.
Cause think about also how you just talk about other people in your personal text messages. Yeah, like my enemy.
How they talk about Justin, it's not going to to look good for them but then also it's going to be a window into how they talk to each other which you know could be bad could be good be anything they're just like a couple who prefers to like communicate in person more like oh we'll talk about it when i get home yeah all my texts my husband are like truth please popcorn please so the paper please bruno needs to go out no bruno needs to go strike a clock please well i'm like talk to texting when i'm really mad in the back of a number i'm like and that fucking fat bitch said to me like i like i sometimes i can't wait like to like unload it onto ben in person i have to send it via text message so i i truly i don't think they could have received a worse like order they should they would have said you know what we'll go to prison for a year like this will be so bad yeah i'm seriously wishing them well that's horrible yeah same and i do feel like things are are really negative um so we shall see we shall see are you ready for our next story number three oh yeah gracie abrams is blasting a fan petition to replace to replace dora jar as her tour opener if you never heard dora jar before like it's okay i'm with you dora jar i was like dora what i it was a lot so anyways gracie abrams has an opener for her tour named Dora Jarr. And I guess- Popora? What? It was a lot.
So anyways, Gracie Abrams has an opener for her tour named Dora Jarr.

And I guess.

Pop off.

What?

Pop off Dora.

Yes.

I guess some of her fans like didn't know who Dora Jarr was and they weren't excited about that.

So they started a petition to replace the opening act for her upcoming tour dates.

And Gracie has now responded.

Anyways, the petition was on change.org calling for jar her real real where real change happens her real name is dora jarkowski which sounds like is she jewish i don't know but dora jar yeah calling for her to be replaced the petition has now been deleted um but it read in part that says quote many fans including myself and myself being a person named dexter morgan these are all names you guys dexter morgan we are baffled by the recent announcement we are perplexed as we do not recognize her and with less than two weeks till the tour it's virtually impossible to familiar ourselves with her slow-paced songs for a memorable concert experience an opening act should set the mood and get the crowd excited but dora's slow tempo songs may not achieve this goal this can't be real jackie i'm so glad we're talking about this and i'm so glad that this happened because i feel like it really proves a thesis of mine from the last couple of years where like stan hood is a true mental illness. Yeah.
Anybody who would put this together, write it and then publicize it is actually a danger to society. I don't know what they thought was going to happen, but I imagine they thought that Gracie would see this be like, Oh my God, my fans don't like it.
And she would girl just to appease to appease these crazy people and the sense of entitlement that that reflects is genuinely that of like a true narcissist sociopath like I believe when you get really involved in stan culture it can actually affect your mental health and this is what we're seeing on change.org right now like this is so crazy it's so rude and first of And first of all, do you know what an opener is? This isn't Coachella where you know everyone. An opener is someone who opens, somebody who's less than, less famous, less successful.
So it's their opportunity to get to know. It's like a platform.
I don't know what, you obviously don't understand like what a concert is, but seriously, I wish Gracie would honestly have been a little bit more harsher with these people. I know she wants to be to her fans but sometimes fans need to be yelled at I love that video of Halsey coming out screaming at everybody yeah so she commented on an Instagram post about this and said just hearing about this absolute ridiculousness so wildly uncool and bizarre and also just does not remotely add up I've only seen everyone's total excitement and I couldn't be luckier or prouder to share a stage with this talented wonder stream everything she's ever made whether or not you're coming to the show Dora forever and era so she said do strong is what she said she said this one's for do this one's for do I like that she was like you know I she tackled it head on she like put them in their place and stood up for her girl Dora I would stand up for Dora because like these types of like stands are like that's what you want right these are the types of people who you know show up they rush the barricade they buy tickets like that's for every pop artist like you want that sort of crazy fan but then you also have to deal with this like this is seriously so crazy um and so disrespectful and so wrong and I love that Gracie like stood her ground and I hope she, you know, brings Dora out every show and makes Dora into a star.
Yeah. But seriously, people are deeply unwell.
Stream Dora, you know? Yeah, put the do on. And I actually- Do what you gotta do.
I have to thank Dexter Morgan because I had never heard of Dora Jar. And now- Me neither.
One, I've heard of her. And two, I feel compelled to support her artistry.
So thanks, Dexter. You just made her bigger.
And I love that they were so proud. It wasn't like anonymous troll behavior.
Like they put their names on this. But don't you feel like Dexter Morgan sounds like a fake name? Yeah.
Who is Dexter Morgan in this world? It sounds like a TV character. Right, right.
I'm sure the the what do the abrams fans call themselves like the abrahimas like the jjs the jjs love that i'm sorry like gracie abrams you're so talented like seriously she is we're holding space for two truths she is an epobaby who nbt next big thing like she is yep it um but i just can't ever separate the two which is good like i'm sure she's so proud lost was an amazing show i think i've heard you've never seen it no i'm at it's so good is it like yeah like it's yes worth coming it's like a little silly at the end and i don't think the end for a lot of people myself included like satiated what we were like dying to find out it was a kind of an impossible plane to land for lack of a better metaphor but the show itself me and ben talk about it all the time still okay so good question if i were to like do a show like a whole watch of a show should i do lost or breaking brad brad or breaking're both good. You know, there's no wrong way to go.
Okay. I think you would like Lost better.
Okay. And I think for the J.J.
lore, I should see Lost. The only problem I really had with Breaking Bad was the fact that there wasn't one character I didn't want to choke.
Like, I hated them all. I hate that feeling.
I don't want to feel that way. I know.
Like Skylar

the mom the dad Breaking Bad whatever his name was hated you. Walter.
I guess we were supposed

to like Walter. I think we were supposed to like Jesse.
I feel like I've seen it. You have.
You

know like I've seen it in my mind's eye. A thousand percent.
Are you ready for our next story?

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pretty pussy type of pussy you ain't ever gonna forget fat juicy and wet wet wet wet wet wet

then i can't pussy like weed pussy like dope pussy like cocaine put it up your nose

oh wow put it up your nose okay i'm not reading anymore i haven't even

I'm going to go ahead um bruna what have you done bruna what have you done i need my dog after you and even like when i think about his lyrics in in his like historically like they're not clean but i don't know they don't come off as like you know that juicy wet go to the next stanza you're gonna i don't know if you'll be able to do it stanza okay which verse verse the, the sexy red verse. Okay.
Bust down middle part. No, higher.
Oh, sexy red. After pee like cocaine.
Oh, wow. Okay.
Oh, no, I can't read that. Right? Yeah, no, I can't.
Oh, wow.

Oh, wow.

No, Claudia.

This is really crazy.

This is so crazy.

This. Right? Yeah, no, I can't.
Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
No, Claudia. This is really crazy.
This is so crazy. This looks, what may look like a nursery rhyme.
Yep. It really, really does.
At least they had an acronym. It's true.
This could have been called FJW. This is so un-Bruno-like, but honestly,

and I know he references the gambling rumor about him.

Do you think that the debts are this steep

that he's had to resort to this?

It's the only logical explanation

that I can offer here today, honestly.

However, this won't make him more money.

Only three people can listen to this.

This is not going to be a cash cow. But have ever seen a song of bruno mars get this much press i actually i have to be honest i saw he had a new song i didn't know that it was this like vulgar and then you said let's make it a story so then i was like oh okay what's what's broody up to and so no I hadn't seen a lot of press about it if I'm

honest okay and I knew I'm obviously not familiar with Sexy Red's line of work but I did see her going viral last week for sharing an AI image of herself and Martin Luther King um and actually Martin Luther King's got a granddaughter Bernice King actually asked her to delete it like saying it was very disrespectful because she's like a very you know I saw that as well performer and so it's kind of like I I didn't know much about sexy right and now I know a lot about obviously her FJW and her work with MLK so she's big on acronyms she's big on acronyms I don't I I just I I don't know this is so not like the Bruno that I know um and I and we're just coming off of apatah which is like such a cutesy little like you know it's a song for everyone now i'm worried if i put on apatah like on spotify like is this gonna come on next like i listen to that with the kids you need to block your spotify from playing that song no it's and it's true it's like a lot of the kids love ap Appetite. It's like becoming like a baby shark.
Yeah, it really is. It's a great song.
I don't know what this is about. I'm just going to skip over this one, you know? Yeah, yeah, just Blindspot.
Like it's so important. Like things don't add up.
I just, I can't even bother trying to get down to the bottom of it. Like I'm just going to ignore this.
Yeah, no, no, no. This was really shocking.
Go read the last of the lyrics for yourself. Like yourself like it's and i actually i feel like i really step up to the plate and i read like you did and i feel like you you pretty much gave us the gist no it gets crazier just no it gets crazier it really does are you ready for this are you ready for a fifth and final story that is such interesting news to you and i i keep singing the same hannah mont Hannah Montana transition what are other ones what are you singing oh yeah but also transitions are what you make them so let's make them rock 100 our fifth and final story that you and I are going to find so interesting and everyone else might turn off is that Spotify has um now put out their inaugural podcaster milestone awards so spotify does that mean giving out awards for podcasting streaming numbers just like how the youtube like does like oh when you hit 100 million views or 100 you get a plaque you get a plaque so joe rogan and crime junkie have both topped the 500 million all-time streams on spotify spotify has given out awards just on on Spotify yeah so they have the gold which is 500 million streams silver is 250 million streams and bronze is 100 million streams I would love to know what we have because we had like 100 million streams a couple of years ago but that was that's all platforms so not on Spotify we are not on this list I think we would have like you know

been awarded something if we were yeah we would know we would know I'm just trying to guess like how far are we from bronze yeah but it's also interesting to see who has hit these numbers on Spotify of course shows that are exclusive to Spotify are gonna have a better chance but Joe Rogan and Crime Junkie are the only two to have hit 500 million all-time downloads which makes sense that. That's cool.
Silver Podcast, so 250 million plus. There's a bunch of them and actually probably not what you would expect.
Dateline NBC, go off Dateline. I would expect that they're always topping charts.
My Favorite Murder. Classic.
Barstool's Pardon My Take. Classic, the male equivalent of the toast.
Right, Stuff You Should Know. I've heard of that one.
I think it's called Shit You Should Know, no? Here it says Stuff You Should Know. Okay, okay.
And then That's All for Silver. So it's a short list.
And then Bronze, 100 million plus streams are Diary of a CEO. Classic.
Rotten Mango. Never heard of it.
That's insane. Small insane small town murder okay and views with david dobrik and jason nash and that's it views views is that of all time because that show has been off the air for five years it must be of all time which is also interesting their grandfather there was there was a time where that show at the peak of like right before the whole scandal when david like would release a vlog and like the world shifted that i imagine they probably crushed it on the podcast and that's why jason nash who was kind of left unemployed after david dobrik decided to take some time off that's why he's like always begging david to bring it back and they did just decide to bring it back.
Like, did you see David Dobrik dropped a new vlog? No, I didn't see David Dobrik dropped a new vlog. I did actually.
And I watched it. And I, I didn't hit the same, obviously.
It was also like different shtick. Like they, it was like a year long project that they, whatever, honestly.
And it was still 420? No, exactly. I'm not going to bother explaining it to you.
Like it was just, it was just a vlog, but I think he's actively coming back to vlogging and now the podcast. So I do wonder if the podcast will be as successful.
It was so big at the time. Yeah.
Yeah. Very interesting group of podcasts.
I wouldn't have kind of some sleeper podcasts at this point there are so many spotify exclusive podcasts like i wait what about smartless what about armchair expert aren't they spotify exclusive see smartless is huge but they weren't spotify exclusive but still i would have assumed they would have made right because they're so big apparently but to be armchair expert no and by the way smartless doesn't do video so they really don't split up their audience that much it's usually just like apple or spotify so that's kind of like interesting to know and then armchair expert being spotify exclusive like people were forced to listen to it on spotify that's really shocking okay flop and same archetypes i'm sure you're shocked by that oh sure um josh and yeah um yes i do find this interesting although i don't know if other people do i don't know if other people do but new goal new manifestation next year's podcast yeah next year's pmas i'm actually gonna reach reach out to our Spotify rep who I spoke to last week.

She was like asking because they were like not uploading our episodes.

How far off we are.

Yeah.

Let's find out.

Yeah.

Goals.

Hashtag goals.

I'm not going to share it.

I'm not going to share if it's not good.

No, no.

Oh, no.

We wouldn't share externally.

Just internally.

And then we would S-O-P-U.

And I have all these empty walls to hang my accolades on my new studio. We need our PMAs.
Let's say a little prayer that this episode worked. Say a little prayer for you.
We're going to wrap up so we can try and get this episode uploaded. Thank you guys so much for listening to The Just on the Monday Morning Show.
We deliver the fast-paced stories you need to remember Monday through Friday on YouTube. So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.
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We've been a beautiful Sunday. We can lead on.
We are. Love ya.
Bye. Let's try for a heart.
I'm doing it like you. You do something and I'm gonna gonna copy you i don't know why we can't like

actually try move over move over which way because towards the armrest like you see our armrest is

still in frame you see like hover above the edge of the armrest more oh oh yeah wow okay okay