S2 EP21: Gary Lineker

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Yo, this is important, man.

Uh, my favorite Lululemon shorts, the ones you got me back in the day, I think they're pacebreakers, the ones with all the pockets.

Well, I just got back from vacation and I think I left them in my hotel room.

And dude, I need to replace these shorts.

I wear them like every day with that Lulu hoodie you got me.

Could you send me the link to where you got them?

Thanks, bro.

Talk soon.

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Podcasts, there are millions of them.

Some might say too many.

I have one already.

I don't have any because there are enough.

Politics, business, sport, you name it.

There's a podcast about it, and they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.

But nobody is covering the most important topic of all.

Why is that?

Are they scared?

Too afraid of being censored by the man?

Possibly, but not us.

We're here to ask the only question that matters.

We'll try and say it at the same time, Max.

What did you do yesterday?

What did you do yesterday?

What did you do yesterday?

That's it.

All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday, nothing more.

Day before yesterday, Max?

Nope.

The greatest and most interesting day of your life.

Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it.

I'm Max Rushton, and I'm David O'Doherty.

Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday?

Hello, and welcome to episode who knows of what did you do yesterday?

David O'Doherty is here.

Hello, David.

The big one.

I'm calling it the big one.

I mean, we've had big ones in the past, but this is a really unexpected big one.

I think when people see this this in their feed, they'll be like, is this one of those weird things where they've blended two different podcasts that I listen to together?

How did these people get this guy?

Yeah, and look, I'm on a bit of a run with booking guests to a lot of people, too.

It's still a run.

A run's a run.

And we've wanted a footballer, haven't we?

We've been talking about getting a footballer for a long time.

So I texted Gary Lineke and I said, do you want to come on?

And he went, Yeah, all right.

And I was like, Fuck off.

Like, he doesn't need to come on this.

He's got a podcast empire.

Why is he coming on this?

And so then for the last week, I haven't really believed it's Gary Lineker.

But, you know, for the tape, we have just recorded it.

So we know it's there.

We know it's him.

There was a funny moment.

There was a funny moment where his son,

the Zoom opened, it was his son.

And I was like, oh, we've just been scammed by a 25-year-old.

It's literally Timu Gary Lineker and we booked.

But yeah, like

it's an interesting day, isn't it?

I think, you know, the whole point when we started this is, I wonder what Gary Lineker has for breakfast.

And you will be, I think people will be pleasantly delighted when you find that out.

I just, I can't, but you've pulled it off.

I mean, because your previous one was you did try to book the guy from adolescence, whose number you also had.

And he just.

Stephen Graham, yeah.

Stephen Graham just responded, you were like, would you like to do our podcast?

And he was like, you're right, kiddo.

And just that was it.

I work on Stephen, you know, he came on soccer M all the time.

I realize I should have asked him about a month ago.

Like, I shouldn't have waited till Adolescence had just been released because I was just like, oh, yeah.

No, like, because like we'd occasionally text over time.

So, like, he's on my to-do list.

But, yeah, we have Gary Ninekere.

You've Gary Nineker's yesterday.

And this is going to open so many more doors.

Meryl Streep is going to see that Lineker's done it.

Exactly.

She'll be getting in touch with you, Max.

So, ladies and gentlemen, here is what Gary Lineker.

Oh, do you need to, David, for your audience, explain who Gary Lineker is?

You know how you do that sometimes for people who don't know Gary Lineker is.

He's been on Live at the Apollo.

He's been on all of those shows.

That's your intro to every guest I've ever got.

Gary Lineker

was one of England's greatest footballers of his generation, his generation being the 80s.

He was the top scorer at the 1986 World Cup.

He was nearly the top scorer at the 1990 World Cup, where England nearly won it, but just didn't quite.

And then he's become the voice of sport on the BBC.

He hosts Match of the Day, the show that Max wasn't in the running to host when Gary Lineker recently announced that he would be stepping back.

He can host the shit out of anything.

Anyway, this is, we did this, I think, six weeks ago.

This is what Gary Lineker did yesterday.

Gary Lineker, welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday?

And welcome to podcasts as well.

Thank you.

I'm not used to them.

This is the first guest we've ever had that was in my Panini 1984 soccer stickers book.

None of it was a good thing.

That started so well.

This is the first guest we've ever had.

And then he took me into 1984.

Well, it is.

It is the first, I'd say, David, the first bona fide national treasure that we've had on the podcast.

So we can extrapolate on Gary's Day.

If we never get Judy Dench or Trevor MacDonald, we can just presume they all live like Gary Lineker.

That's how I'm going to presume.

Well, Trevor MacDonald lives around the corner from me.

Does he?

She could want him on, huh?

Could you pop around in an hour and get Trevor MacDonald?

She'd get him on Ashton.

It'd be amazing.

I I think Richard Osmond is going to have something to say about that national treasure status.

With the greatest respect to Gary, Osman, you know.

Do you think Osmond's there?

You've had Osman on.

Yeah, he's national treasure status, surely.

He writes the nation's books and makes all of the nation's television.

And he also does a podcast.

So this is a forensic analysis of your day, Gary.

Okay.

And all we ask from you is that you tell us the absolute truth.

If you're happy with that, we can.

Yes, I'm fine.

I'm fine.

I didn't masturbate yesterday, so

thank God for that.

I did say we were going to say, do you know, obviously, this might be the first interview where someone doesn't talk about you shitting yourself in Italian 90.

Well, unless, of course, you shat yourself yesterday, which would be a massive break for us.

This is quite funny, right?

Yesterday, so I was, I was,

which I'm no doubt we'll come to, but I was in the gym yesterday

and with my personal trainer.

And I'd taken my dog for a walk prior and out of my shorts pocket fell a poo bag and he went do you always carry one of those around since italian 90

okay let's start at the beginning Gary when did you wake up yesterday yesterday I woke up around

8 30.

I wake when my alarm goes off basically because I have a very not exactly habitual week it's all over the shop different days so for example when I on a Saturday night I don't get home from much of the day until 3, 3.30 a.m.

So, then I'll put my, so I put my alarm on for about 11 and then I'll wake up at 11.

So, but on yesterday, it's about 8:30 because I don't know.

Yeah, we only care about yesterday.

We don't couldn't care less about Sunday.

Okay, so 8:30.

And do you spring out?

Hang on, what's the Lineke pajamas?

Are you in, I'm hoping, the light blue Italia 90

third kit?

That's the dream, or maybe some silk GL Gary Lineke pajamas.

uh I sleep naked naked I hate stuff like yeah

you don't want to be constrained well I I'm definitely not constrained um either even if I'd wore pajamas but I just don't I've never just don't find them comfortable so yeah do you spring up or when the alarm goes off oh my goodness come on come on we're better than that Gary this is a cerebral podcast come on I never said it

it's a bloody long time since I springed up in the morning with that surround.

I bet Gary Lineker doesn't have his phone beside his bed and just looks at meaningless bullshit for 20 minutes before he waddles out to the loo.

Straight up?

Not quite straight up.

So my alarm got off.

I might snooze it.

And I think I did yesterday, snoozed it.

And then my dog's in my room.

Philbert, and he's very good.

He won't, he knows he has to wait until I sit up in bed before he just leaps on the bed.

So that happens then.

Then I there again.

I don't look at my phone at all until

I have my coffee actually.

But I get up, yeah, I've just got out of bed and I clean my teeth, put something on, because obviously I'm going to walk the dog.

That's the first thing I do, take him out.

It is a great shame, in a way, that you're not a naturist for your dog walk.

I mean, we would have probably heard about it in the news if they didn't turn the thing off.

Yeah, I think you'd be paparazzi outside the house on a few occasions over recent times.

They'd need a zoom lens.

Stick to your guns if that's what you want to do.

Okay, so do the clothes, sorry, David, do you

have you got them laid out?

Is there a person to lay out the clothes or do you just pick up what's on the floor, Gary, and stick it straight on?

Yesterday I was, because I was working out later on,

I just stick a pair of shorts on and

my kit and yeah, that would have been it, really.

Clean my teeth first and then, if that's of of interest.

If it is of interest and then put my shorts and my kit on.

Gary you strike me as the sort of person with one of those new electric toothbrushes that beeps when you have to change position in your mouth.

I've got a relatively new electronic toothbrush, yes, but it doesn't beep and tell me.

Although it does unhappy face if I don't do long enough.

Is that right?

How long do you need to do your toothbrush?

Over two minutes and it starts smiling.

So I think two to four minutes is fine.

If you do more than four minutes, which I did once, I think I was drunk, and it had an unhappy face after I went past four minutes.

My best friend in school saw that there wasn't a world record for brushing your teeth.

This is when we were about 10.

Ian Walsh.

And he brushed his teeth for eight hours and sent it into Norris McWhirter on the Guinness Book of Records TV show.

And they had someone on from the British Dental Association being like, The reason some records don't exist is because they're really bad for you.

For example, brushing your teeth for eight hours, no one should ever do it.

So, it's good that your phone doesn't try and go for that crown.

Yes,

I'm not going to try and compete with your friend's Guinness Book of Records record.

Had you done that yesterday, God, what a day we'd have had.

That's imaginative.

And then at 7 o'clock,

at 10 o'clock, I got out my toothbrush and I went for it.

Okay, so you brush your teeth, downstairs.

What coffee were you having, Gary?

I've got one of those, you know, I don't know what you call them, those little Italian machine, not machine, but you know, you can put the coffee in a little bit and the water bubbles.

I call it a pizzetti.

I don't have a...

It might be a pizzetti.

I think it is something nice.

It's a real satisfaction in when the water sort of gurgles up and it flows through.

Once it gets through and you go, ah, yes.

But before I have my coffee, I take the dog out.

So what's our walk, Gary?

Do you walk past Trevor MacDonald?

I've not yet walked past Trevor MacDonald whilst on the dog walk, although I've walked past him a few times on the high street.

Um, so no, it's just a quick 10-minute one, that one, to let him do his business.

His Italian 90, as we call it,

and um, let him do that, and then we come back, and then I have my coffee, always with a little bit of something sweet, a bit of chocolate or something.

That's that's my breakfast, basically.

When you and Trevor MacDonald are approaching each other in the street, is it just a nod?

What's the MacDonald?

Great question.

Thank you, David.

I thought it was a good one.

I think he generally comes over and says, and finally.

No,

we have a quick word normally when I see him.

Okay, that's nice.

So is it a situation where as soon as the dog drops the big one, you turn around and come straight back again?

Is it

mission accomplished kind of vibe?

After I put it in in the poo bag obviously being a yes yes good citizen no not quite i do a little lap so it depends where he poos if he poos as we just over the road as we go out then i still give him that bit but then after my coffee you see i take him on a proper walk right okay so it's back in coffee can i ask the make of chocolate is it uh are we talking like a lint mint intense no it's normally some kind of biscuity more of a biscuity chocolate kind of it varies all the time right but what was yesterday a penguin yesterday was a wagon wheel a wagon wheel

for breakfast

and today actually

i can prove it no i don't i believe i believe you a wagon wheel for breakfast i didn't know they still existed wagon wheels And then I saw them the other day and I thought, wow, wagon wheel.

I'm not one of those, so I've got them, yeah.

But you open your day with a wagon wheel.

Holy cow, where is this going to go, Magda?

Wheels come off.

When I came up with this idea, David, I knew at one point we'd get to Gary Lineke having a wagon wheel for breakfast and think maybe we've completed the whole idea of this podcast.

I would find it a bit the marshmallow.

I'm not.

There's a lot of people.

I love the marshmallow.

Okay.

Well, then it's a great breakfast for you.

I like the tea cakes as well.

They're often something I have for you.

Are the tunnels?

Well, tunnels or even the M ⁇ S like tea cakes.

I quite like those.

Sorry, there's one thing we haven't covered here.

Gary, when you went for the walk, do you have headphones on?

Are you listening to old episodes of What Did You Do Yesterday?

Are there old episodes?

How long has it been going?

How long have been going, Debbie?

What?

Six months now, I think?

Six months.

They're not old episodes, really, are they?

I don't really function until I've had my coffee, so

I don't listen to anything.

I start listening to podcasts after I've had my coffee, and I do listen to a lot of podcasts, because we have a lot of podcasts.

Yeah.

So if during during that sort of you're you're just the functional dog business walk if someone was to approach you you're not in the right mood for people it sounds at this time you're in a sort of bit of a grump is that a worry for you or do you just you head down to just try and you know get this lap done i go around there's usually a dog walk or two i i can i can muster up a good morning right like i tend to do and a smile you know oh wow i've got everything

it's have to can't really cope with a full-on conversation at that time

I find when you're holding a dog shit in a bag, people generally don't want to make conversation with you as well.

It's a very easy thing, you just sort of dangle it and they let you go.

Fling it at them if they start talking too much.

You've got two minutes, otherwise, this is in your face.

Okay, so we come back, we make the coffee, and we have the wagon wheel.

Are we standing for that sort of like sort of espresso bar to where we sit down and really check our time?

Yeah, sit down.

Okay.

yeah and again in silence and that's when i check my phone normally see if i have any messages yeah and yesterday did you have anything interesting i don't think i did actually is it a 35 new messages situation gary when you turn on your phone very rarely very rarely that

two three eight seven something it depends i think there's quite i think there's a few yesterday um i'm in a group chat they do a wordle with my kids and stuff and i think some of them did it really late we have a league table i think some of them did it because you get doctor point if you don't

if you don't complete it in the day and I think three of them three of them last night did it about the night before that I should say at 11.59 but I received them in the morning.

I haven't thought I'd won it that day.

How are you getting on in the in the table?

I'm in a Champions League spot.

Oh are you?

Yeah, there's only five in the league.

Okay.

And

given the coefficient, this year, five will make it

from Wordle into the you're absolutely right.

When I wake up, I generally have seven to nine messages, Gary, and they're all from Max, because Max is in Australia.

All through the day, he's been texting me ideas for guests for this.

And generally, they're the most obvious.

It'll be like, ask Michael McIntyre, ask Mel Brooks, just these legends of comedy that I'm supposed to just be like, oh yeah, I'll get Brooks on the blower, no problem.

You probably had a message from me saying, confirming this is on.

Yes, I did get one yesterday morning from you.

And when you get a message from me, Gary, it's not often.

I'd say

I'll use you once a year.

I reckon I've got once a year in my locker from you.

Does it pique your interest?

Do you think, oh, this is good?

Or are you like, oh, it's mad?

I was like, what's he want from me now?

That's what I think straight away.

What is his request this time?

What is his new podcast?

Relatively new podcast that's six months old.

Yeah, I suppose it's true to say you've never messaged me.

You've never begun the conversation.

I've never got, you've never got, Max, could you do this for me yeah so i'm probably in your debt if you want anything done oh wow real godfather vibes

yeah i'm not going to kill anyone uh okay so we've had the coffee we're on the phone the day's about to begin yeah you're a lot you're awake you smile perhaps for the first time in the day what's happening yesterday which is what this is about obviously yes

i i had to do a little bit of recording with Micah.

So my son Harry came around who set up this, who's my techie, because for all the podcasts and I've got in the world I'm technically inefficient and then I went sit then I went and sit in the garden in the sun.

Oh lovely.

The dog's sitting on me and then he starts putting his paw on me leg so he knows that's it.

I have to take him out then.

And now it's Philbert gets his real go now.

Yeah proper go now.

And then I think I think we went to the well we did.

We went into the village as well and went round the shops.

He likes going round the shops because when I leave him outside the shop if he's good he gets a biscuit.

I mean okay hey, what I like.

Not a wagon wheel.

So, what shops did you pop into, Gary?

It's a little deli.

I've got some fresh

British asparaguses in, so I got some of that.

Because you only buy British, Gary, isn't it?

You know, famously refused to eat any foreign vegetables.

Yeah, proper patriot.

Great British bananas.

We look forward to

British lemons.

Gary, do you tie the dog up outside the shops?

Is the dog best behaved that it can just

go?

No, I'd have to, yeah, I have to talk I'd put yeah put him around a poster on one of the little dog things yes no yeah because otherwise he'd run in after me he wouldn't run away because he yeah he just doesn't like being a part really so give him a biscuit tell him I won't be long wait there have a chat whoever you want

I'll be back in a minute I didn't cook yesterday apart from the asparagus but um I didn't cook apart from that yesterday because I cook a lot I love cooking but normally I shop to precisely about what I'm going to cook.

That's my normal thing because

I'm not one of the, I don't go in with a trolley and go, well, look at that and grab loads of stuff.

The jack reacher of just this is what I need for now.

And I, you know, you

live for the moment.

Live for the moment.

Okay, so is that all you buy?

Wagon wheels.

Wagon wheels.

Of course.

Wagon wheels.

Forget what it was.

Genuinely so, yeah, wagon wheels.

Of course, it was.

Is this a contractual ad read thing, Gary?

In every podcast you ever do, you just.

No, but if it's not after this,

if they don't get in touch after this, I mean, I'll be extremely disappointed.

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Okay, right, so you've got the wagon wheels.

You've clearly got a spring in your step.

We wander home.

I wandered home.

It's late morning now, around

midday.

Midday.

I have my session in the gym.

Home gym or are you down to fitness first?

Home gym.

The people.

Home gym at home.

Yes,

which I you I'm in three times a week.

And somebody comes to the house?

Yeah.

There are two reasons for that.

One, he'll push me a bit more than I'll ever push myself.

And secondly,

I will turn up if I have an appointment.

Otherwise, I might go, I'll do it tomorrow.

He's trained me for

nearly 30 years now.

Is he sort of a shouter?

Is he one of those personal trainers whose sort of neck is bigger than their body?

Yells at you.

No, he's not a shout.

Dan's not a shouter.

He doesn't need to.

I'm a really, really good pupil.

You never really let it go after football.

The way some footballers, now, it's unfair on footballers always think, because if a recently retired footballer puts on like a stone and you see them as a pundit two years later, you look at them and go, oh my goodness, that this person's, but like you, and here's a spooky thing, and I promise this is the only thing that I know about you that is actually spooky.

My most unusual gift gift ever is when I was nine, I knew the height, weight, and birthplace of every player in the old English First Division.

And I still remember your stats from the 1984 Panini soccer sticker aside.

Can we compare them now?

Can we compare

84 to now?

If they were indeed accurate back in 1984.

They were.

There's no way.

Panini did the hard yards.

Bourne Leicester.

I remember that.

That's correct.

Definitely.

I can't remember it, but yeah.

5'10.

Yeah.

I think I've...

Do you know what?

I have these massive medicals every, I know, 18 months or so, just to keep check on things.

And

one of the million things they do is take my height.

And the last time I went, my height had dipped for the first time.

Oh, really?

Because, you know, as you get older, you do eventually start.

And I just, it was like, oh, such a body blow.

I went down to five, nine and a half.

It's the start of of the shrinkage.

Yeah.

Is that sort of why you decided you couldn't do match of the day?

Because in a few years, you'd be like three foot one.

I wouldn't rise above the desk.

Gary, in 1984, you were 11-stone 11.

That would have been an inaccurate.

Most of my playing career,

it might have been one of those where they take it from you when you're about 17.

I was generally about

12 stone 10 when I played.

Okay.

And what's your weigh now?

I weigh now about 12 stone 12

to 13 stone.

I'm usually around that.

I weigh myself every day.

And if it dips, which I did yesterday and I forgot before I do my teeth, basically, I check my weight every morning because you're at your lightest generally in the morning, so it makes you feel good.

And if it goes above 13, then I...

I act accordingly.

And if it goes below 12, 10, I don't...

You eat your wagon wheel?

I'll eat two wagon wheels.

Go at the restaurant.

And yesterday,

were you within that yesterday?

It was beautiful yesterday.

And today, funnily enough.

Don't care about today.

I know you don't.

I don't weigh myself, but I just try to judge as to how snugly my socks fit.

And if my socks are tight, then it's time to

go to work.

Can you lift socks right over your belly?

Really long socks.

one massive sock

yeah come on fit in it today it's the first episode where he's not just been wearing his sock is that not a sock oh yeah

let himself go in the last week okay so we've done a gym workout this is phenomenal it's uh it's not even midday yet uh no it is it's midday my session's midday till one and then i had i went see my um osteopath that guy seen my back looked after me i see him once a month before before that I used to wait till my back spasmed which was quite frequently and then I'd go and see him and then he'd sort me out but I've gone for the prevention is better than cure thing now so it's about a 50 minute drive because it's out where I used to live near Sunningdale but he's brilliant he's brilliant Did you get away with 16 years of professional football or whatever it was in pretty good Nick then?

I was incredibly lucky.

Yeah, I had um apart from at the end with my toe issues which stopped me playing in Japan, apart from that, I think the longest I was ever out through injury was two weeks.

Oh my goodness.

I had the illness, hepatitis.

I was out for about three months, but that was an illness rather than an injury.

So, no, I was really lucky.

Were you as sad as I was when...

Because I remember running into the living room and going...

Gascoyne, Waddle, Lineke, Goal, because we'd just signed Gary Lineke.

And then we saw, and then I turned the TV on and Chris Waddell had gone to Marseille.

Were you as sad as I was that Waddell had gone to Marseille?

I imagine I was considerably sadder because I'd signed I signed for Spurs then I went on holiday and I got the news my agent called me and said they've sold Chris Waddle to Marseille.

Honestly, it was like someone stealing 15 goals out of my backpack.

I mean it was so good.

So good.

None of this can make the edit because it didn't happen yesterday, but it was

oh bit of nostalgia i but i was i was actually thinking you know about i think it was at 1203 yesterday i was thinking about the time that chris waddle

was sold

i was so getting about it yeah i love it

i want to do some forensic historical detectiving here but I mean, that sadness you felt, I mean, I can't blame you for this, but my last, I played rugby, but I was a footballer playing rugby.

And my cool boots were ones that you had endorsed in Japan, Quasars.

Quasars, yeah, Quasar.

Well, my first ever game with Quasar boots was when we won 4-2 in the Bernabau against Spain.

And I scored all four goals.

And they launched a boot that day.

And I had to play the last five minutes of that game with the sole hanging off because it wasn't anything.

And I thought I can't change the boot because they've just launched and it looked really, really terrible, even though I'd scored four goals.

Genuinely true.

And the thing was flapping around as I was running.

Otherwise, I'd have scored five.

Are you not eating a lot today, Gary?

I'll just go ahead and do that.

No, I don't eat.

I only really eat one big meal a day and I'll pick at things.

And then

I jumped in my car.

And have you had a shower?

Presuming you've had a shower here, Gary.

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention.

Of course, I had a shower, yeah.

Okay, good, good, good.

I had a shower.

That was straight after the gym because I was quite tight for time to get to see my my osteopath osteopath oh yeah that's right with the osteo does he crack everything does he like yeah no normally no cracking yesterday just like manoeuvres you know just talks my gets my pelvis in the right place keeps me keeps me on trap because I've worked out prevention is much better than cure because normally I used to wait till I have a back spasm I've got two really worn discs down the bottom so I get quite a few lower back issues you know played a few hundred games of football I think it's taken its toll a bit do you say to him can you get me back to five foot ten please no my Pilates does that but I didn't do Pilates yesterday I'm just trying to keep my height but just me but I think my five foot ten days are over

because I do remember tales from my football obsessive period of Peter Shilton wanting to be taller so he used to hang from the stairs with books tied to his feet so which he then blamed on having longer arms than normal yeah he's he's a very strange person

no he's a great friend he's a great friend Peter

but yeah because he's you know nowadays if you he'd be considered well he's probably shrunk like me but he's because he's older than me but yeah nowadays you he wouldn't be big enough I don't think yes they're they're huge aren't they we'd have won the world cup wouldn't we because he wasn't he wouldn't be big enough well if his arms were longer

he didn't stretch him enough on the stairs, did he?

Because he went the right way and all five penalties.

But that was my fault.

That was my fault, because I roomed with Peter Shorten.

And I said, we kept watching these penalty shootouts because they were quite a new thing back then.

I said to him, there's always two penalties straight down the middle.

Why doesn't if a keeper just stands, he's going to save two, for sure.

Yeah.

And so that was the plan.

So that's why he went the right way on every penalty, but every penalty they stuck in the corner.

Half an hour late.

Who is to blame so do we drive home from the osteo and we get home and now what's the plan I whizzed in and I had to take the dog to walk because I got an early dinner which is why I didn't eat much because I was eating at five o'clock so I tried to eat one major meal a day and I was seeing a group of friends in town so I came home took the dog out for 15 minutes and then came back and then a couple of my sons were coming to come later anyway because I had a long night I don't like to leave him for too long so then I went went quickly back out, got the train into London, got on the Victoria line to Oxford Circus, got off.

I'm giving you really detailed.

Yeah,

that's what I'm trying to do.

You could just give us your postcode.

That would be really just for the

show notes.

Well, everyone knows it anyway, the amount of people hanging out at the front door, particularly when I've said something daft.

And then,

yeah, then walked to the restaurant called Mountain, which is fabulous.

Okay, so ho.

This is what five got.

Do you listen to anything on?

Are you got another one of your podcasts on while you're doing this journey?

Yes, I had

yes, I was listening to actually I was listening to ours because I always check ours back, make sure I'm happy with everything.

I was listening to ours on the way in.

When I say hours, I mean the rest is football, not ours, Max, because

you do have other geese.

Did you think it was a good e?

I thought it was a good app.

It was not the greatest weekend of Premier League football.

It wasn't.

But then it's our job is to elevate the conversation to make it better than the football itself.

And make it interesting, yeah.

See, this is as a I've enjoyed both of your broadcasting.

And what I do like about you both is that if something is bad, you're not afraid to say, which I think is what you should do.

It's no point pretending that these are good matches or particularly this weird end of season where there's nothing really to play for.

I know it's a real, it's a real kind of, I mean, the only thing is the Champions League spots now, because the bottom three are gone and so yeah you're right.

No you've got to call it as it is because people are not I mean we have a very very

you know

football educated audience so you can't blag it.

I mean Sky used to do it all the time.

I think they don't now.

They call it as they see it a bit more than they used to now.

I agree.

But in the old days every game was like it's a great game.

I found that interminable.

Yeah you can't bullshit.

I really believe this you cannot bullshit sports fans of anyone.

And also like I've had this on some of the stuff in Australia where there was one game we're doing doing in the Champions League, and I'm with Craig Foster and Mark Bosnich, and it was really, and we were really enjoying it, and

we're doing this game, Napoli-Barsa, and it was okay.

And we're going, that's okay.

And then some of the graphics went instant classic in Naples.

And I was looking down going, what?

Because we've just been saying it was shit.

And then I'm like, this is pretty generous of the graphics.

I'm sorry.

And you're like, no football fan is going to go, if you say that game is shit, no fan is going to go,

it was shit.

Maybe I should rethink this thing I've invested my whole life in and just choose something else.

It wasn't a good game.

Maybe I don't like football, you know.

I did the thing with England in the Euros where I said the game was shit.

Oh, yeah.

And there was, a whole world went mad.

And I was just thinking, but it was.

And we were shit.

We played really badly.

If I'd have said they were poor, everyone would have gone, oh, well, that's fine.

You can say that.

But it's four letters, just the different letters.

I mean, I don't understand the swearing issues.

Fast forward to Max's Australian A-League YouTube, and he's like, oh, the Woola Maloo Joe.

Joey's against the Porpiri.

What

the greatest game in the history of the sport, they're calling it.

Don't you want that, Max?

Cooper loves that shoe, too.

Oh, now he's into Cooper's food.

Wow, he is loving it.

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Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, no, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's going to tell you the truth.

How do I present this with any class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

AKA Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

Um, okay, so who are we meeting for dinner?

This is exciting, Gary.

One of my best friends, Kingy, and

actually a group of his friends.

What's the food?

It's sort of

British-Spanish, British produce, but kind of a northern Spain vibe.

Thomas, the chef, Thomas Parry, brilliant chef.

Michelin Story got recently.

It's sort of meat and fish and, you know, kind of

good produce.

Yeah, Gary's insisted on British produce for this

as we know.

And do Kingies, because you're, you know, like, it's Kingies, mate, and you're coming along.

Are they a bit like, why have you dragged Gary along?

Or do they sort of bring you away?

Well, they didn't say that, but I felt it.

Right.

I didn't

say it.

Lots of in-jokes that you sat on the end.

Yeah.

But then, do you know what the really good thing was is that when I arrived, I was actually not quite, I was the,

there were six of us all together.

I was the fifth to arrive.

And I've walked in the restaurant, I can't see them.

And they said, oh, I thought I'm first here, because I'm quite punctual.

Footballers are.

So you get fined if you're late.

So I arrived there, bang on five o'clock, and they said, Yeah, your parties here.

And I thought, Well, I went, Oh,

they're downstairs.

And they put them downstairs, you see.

So I went downstairs and I went, Well, I said, King, you can't even get like a table in the upstairs on the where.

And he's gone, no, no, I'm sorry, sir.

And then they came down and went, Gary, we've got you upstairs.

So,

oh,

you know,

And there were these five old ladies, and it had been their dream to be at this restaurant, and you just kicked Gary Lineker, just kicked them out.

He's got the golden boot from the 1986 World Cup in his hands.

He's pointing at us.

Do you know?

I always take that around with me just in case.

Yeah.

Opens so many doors, doesn't it?

It's amazing.

Because he's solid.

You can bash the doors down.

Actually, you smacked an old woman in the face with his boot.

People don't know the real Gary Lineker.

It's lucky we're doing this episode.

Okay, so are we starting with cocktails with Kingy and the lads?

Yes, I had

a Negroni.

Okay, that's a strong start, isn't it?

Wow.

Strong.

Two Negronis, actually.

Okay, so you're sipping on a Negroni, and do they just bring you the food, or are you as they're sort of...

I did the order because I've frequented that restaurant on numerous occasions.

Quite a lot of pressure to order

the table.

But I did hand over the wine list to somebody else to choose the wine.

And did you order far too much or the perfect amount?

Oh, great question.

I think I pretty much nailed it

because I've beaten this a lot.

Imagine me and David are kingy and the lads, and you are now talking to the waiter.

Could you just do the order for us?

I can try.

We had the sobrusala, yeah, but like as if you're ordering it, like with a bit of you know, well, you want me you want me to pretend that you're the

server, right?

Okay, role play, yeah, here we go, right,

server, wow,

boom on the table.

No, I think I I went.

So tell us what you're doing.

We'll go with the salber salad.

And then they do the amazing...

See, I can't automatically going out of that mode.

So we'll have two

spider crab omelets.

Okay, interesting.

Whoa.

Which are delicious.

And we'll also please have...

I don't know why I'm looking up there.

Because that's where the city waiter is.

That's where the city waiter is.

It's good.

It's good.

It's good for the visuals.

Yeah, great.

So, and I go, and we'll have two of the monk fish and scallop crude

and then we had a shared Dover sole.

We had a duck dish and we'll have the nachos big plate of nachos.

We had the ribeye the big ribeye

and some

fur potatoes

that's F-I-R they're kind of like new potatoes like long and thin things beautiful with loads of butter on and some wood-fired rice that went beautifully with the duck.

Yeah.

This is a good meal.

It'd be funny if Gary had made all this up and he just had a frozen Dr.

Oatker pizza at home.

Some Gino Janelli ice cream, yeah.

If the server gets in touch and complains, well, actually, you ordered two of those, not one.

Is it a bun, is it a very polite you have this, you have this, or you, is there, if your eye on something, someone's taking a bit too much of that omelette and you really want to get it i think actually everyone was pretty civilized yes okay that's it was and what was the conversation what was the conversation gary a bit reminiscing we were the last time we all met together was um on kingy's um stank do um in barcelona now um what uh what happens then when you're talking football do you like talking about football when you're not broadcasting about football because i find i'm sort of footballed out so if somebody says oh what about the scores last night i'm like oh god come on i'm gonna do this later it's been the one ever present in my life football really You know,

my kids have been around half the time, probably, and

been married twice.

My parents have gone.

So it's been, yeah, it's kind of part of my life.

I love, I genuinely love football.

No, I love it.

I just don't, I just don't, if someone in a cafe says, I'd rather just talk about biscuits if I'm in a cafe and someone's.

With respect, though, Max.

I really respect you and everything you've done.

You're not fucking Gary Lineker.

Okay?

not sure the comparison is exactly the same thing here.

I see where you're coming from.

Did you play Max?

Forgive me, I don't know your career statistics, but did you actually

play in football boots?

I mean, I'm surprised you don't know that Melbourne University old boys 2023-2024 champions after 20 strong years at Polytechnic Fours and before that Keeble College first 11, Hills Road 6 from College first 11, A couple of games for the Gu's, Cambridge United.

I was an old school target man, lots of flick-ons.

But when the game changed, then I had to go back into what I call a non-moving pivot, sort of holding midfield.

Like most strikers are.

Yeah.

They gradually work themselves back.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I refuse to go back to centre-back.

But I've got a good touch for a big man, definitely.

We'd have worked quite well together, actually.

Gary, I'd have put a lot of...

I know Waddle's gone, but I'd have got a lot of flick-ons for you.

This is awful.

Oh, my God.

This is the low point.

This is like

telling Osmond, you know what I mean, how he could have improved his million-dollar selling books.

But yeah, no, I'd see you make a point, David, about our respective careers.

But for one small moment there, I thought Go and I really bonded about our football careers.

That is true.

Okay, so this dinner, did you get a dessert?

Did you get a dessert?

I didn't.

I had to go because I was

which we'll come on to, but I had to leave them.

I have to leave them to it because I had an

appointment at the copper box at the

Stratford.

Oh, is that the...

Are you doing the new

dinner and like the Vicar and Dibley Christmas special and keep having dinners?

No.

Oh, this new

football thing.

It's like Six Aside, and yeah, and we've got a team in it, Micah, Alan, and myself Shira and I went along to see our team play so I got the back on the tube

Oxford circle I'll give you my route Oxford

up to Highbury and Islington and then changed to is it the mild May line I'd never heard of it until I

got over ground to

Hackney Wick and then walked

seven minutes so we've got the the dreaded two negronis gaffer has just walked into the dressing room exactly

you'll be in that you'll be in that song i went into the dressing room to see the players before the game it's the first time in the dressing room i think since i finished playing other than maybe to do a link with nobody in there before a match or something but with the actually players ready to play it's the first time i think since i've since i finished um and it i was i didn't

oh it's weird really i felt didn't know what to say or anything i'm not Nothing silly first five.

Just fucking get into it.

Did you do that?

Oh, I never thought of that.

Does it still smell of winter green?

Is that the smell of a football dressing room?

Do you know?

It didn't smell like, you know, the old, what was that liniment they used to do?

Deep on you?

Deep heat and all that kind of stuff they used to.

It didn't smell of any of that.

But maybe because they're playing in a warm inside arena on Astraturf.

And maybe you don't need that kind of ointment.

And do these players...

So there's you, you're all there, you, Mike Richards, Alan Shearer, are they in awe of you, or are they so young they don't have the post-match of the day?

I didn't say, I didn't say, excuse me, lads, before you start, are you in awe of us?

Had you left the Italian, the golden boot at the restaurant and you were holding the golden boots there.

I actually had it under my jumper now, just hiding it, even though I didn't have a jumper.

Gary's like a gather round and he's got his highlights, YouTube Real, just telling me it.

Lads, get a load of this.

What is this?

Is it are they X-Pros or are they pros?

A lot of them are ex-pros

and it's good standard.

Players that perhaps haven't quite made it or they're criers or they've had injuries and they've come back.

If your team is looking for an aging target man who now drops back and doesn't run anymore,

I have someone on my books that I might be able to farm out for.

I played one charity six aside thing where I think Danny Welbeck came with his mates and they played we're playing soccer AM and we thought we were quite good at football and it was just so like oh god it's a different sport these people can just do things with their feet it's just not on yeah but I'm still available of course okay so this takes you to this is quite late in the you've had a long day game yeah yeah no that I and it's only this morning that I thought I thought oh I'm doing Max's thing and David's thing I actually had a really busy day'cause some days I don't you know, not much happens at all.

So got there about half seven and then the game was at twenty past half past eight and finished about nine o'clock so and then we you know did a bit of a few interviews and and lots and lots of selfies

and eventually um meandered out to try and try and get myself home and are you are you back on the back on the train

yeah

walked back to hackney wick got on the train it was it was delayed about 25 minutes there were lots of train

yeah it was weird because the train's supposed to run every few minutes.

I don't, there must have been an issue.

And it became absolutely packed with lots of people that had been to see this.

But everyone was really nice.

And how's the journey home?

Apart from that wait, it was all right.

Got off at

same again,

Highbury and Islington, and then got the Victoria line down, this time down to Vauxhall.

Straight to Vauxhall, yeah.

Vauxhall, and then got the.

Is it probably an Isleworth train?

Isleworth train?

20 to 11, I I think.

You're probably getting the Isleworth one as well.

Yeah, one of those.

Yeah, it goes.

Okay, lovely.

And actually quite nostalgic for me.

Like just hearing these, you know, because my football club was in Chiswick.

I'd get that a lot, the Vauxhall down to Melbourne to Chiswick.

It is a bit of a way.

It is a way.

So with a 25-minute, you're like, ah, you know what's a problem.

You have to put 10 grand on your oyster card.

That's what Mark says to you.

Coins.

Too annoying.

Okay, so we come through the door.

Are you spent now, Gary?

You know, those negronis started to hit in.

Yeah, I was tired.

I was tired.

I'm not as young as I was.

Do you nip for another wagon wheel or is it just straight to brushing your teeth for between two and four minutes?

No, no, no.

No, well, let the dog out in the garden.

Just chuck him out in the back, just in case he needs a pee.

And

then came in.

You asked him, Should I fire Rory Stewart?

And whether you take a pee in the next minute, will just

that was a big fan of Rory.

He's a big fan of Rory.

Yeah, he did.

Yeah, when he came round, he yeah, he was a big fan, like Rory.

Yeah, we went in

upstairs, like most people, I would imagine, getting to bed.

Are we TV on?

Are we, it's not looking at film?

No, never, never.

I haven't got a TV in my bedroom.

I don't.

I don't.

Read a book?

No.

I only really watch sport on television.

I watch box a series but normally that's when I'm travelling or around on my but I don't know I don't watch too much tally do you open the window and wave goodnight to Trevor McDonald and he waves I can't I don't I don't know where he lives I don't know why his house is otherwise obviously I would if he's the house behind me on that I would have done but he doesn't I don't think he lives there

and do you is there like would you like to go around to his are you waiting for him to invite you or do you maybe you could like take the bull by the horns and invite him over yeah I want to be there at 10 o'clock

to see.

If he watches the news.

Exactly.

Like we have some guests on this pod who have really kind of interesting ways of going to sleep.

I don't know if you find it easy to just nod off or if you have to like Sam Campbell invented his own entire fictional sport for example or you just head on the pillow out.

Head on the pillow.

I don't know.

It's funny when you go to sleep and you sometimes lay there and you think, oh, it's not going to be gone and then you wake up in the morning.

It's mad.

Sister, it's like almost as though you fall asleep,

even when you don't think you will.

Yeah.

No, I'm quite a good sleeper, actually.

I'm not a bad sleeper.

And as I said before, I sleep in until the arm goes off.

But I suppose for this, this,

what happened yesterday,

I definitely fell asleep before midnight.

So for the last, what, I don't know, 40 minutes of the day yesterday, I don't think I can tell you what was going on.

As soon as you're out, you're gone.

We're done.

We need nothing more from you.

Imagine how short this episode had been if I had a really early night.

Oh, we've had Nish Kumar literally spent eight hours on the sofa.

Yeah.

It was our first episode we ever did.

We're like, I'm not sure if this is a winner.

He had diarrhea and then he sat on the couch watching a boring football.

I can't relate to that.

That's why I carry my poo bags.

Of course.

And would you look back and say that was a good day?

Is that a representative day for the

This is have we got here?

Yes, I got one.

He's got one, of course.

He's got.

Pooh bag in one pocket, golden boot in the other.

Now he's coming.

Was that a representative day?

Do you feel that was a good day?

Looking forward to it?

I think it was a good, busy day.

Yeah.

I mean, my days really do vary apart from Saturdays, but that's about to change as well, of course.

Well, thank you, Gary.

Pleasure.

Thank you so much.

Maybe you should come every time you shrink by an inch.

You can come back on.

So that was Gary's day, David.

Do you think I shouldn't have mentioned, well, my anger about the boots that he endorsed that I have, or even bringing up his playing weight in 1984 was, in retrospect, maybe I shouldn't have done that.

I really like the moment where I was genuinely talking to Gary Linneck and we were comparing football careers.

And I did go a little bit like, actually, I can hold my own.

He just asked me if I played.

I'll tell him.

And you were like, this is absolutely terrible.

He played in the match where Maradona scored the greatest goal of all time.

And you're literally telling him about knockdowns you did on Hackney Marshes.

But when it all starts, and when I've said this, as we said to Gary just when he came off here, you know, what people want to know is that Gary Lineke has a wagon wheel for breakfast.

You know, that is

elite.

What did you do yesterday, isn't it?

There is Gary Lineker.

He's naked.

He brushes his teeth, takes his dog out for a shit, comes back, eats a wagon wheel.

What else do you need?

What else do you need?

I wonder, yeah, I do, I couldn't ask him because it would have just slowed down the momentum.

Does he like nibble the chocolate off the top?

You know what I mean?

Does he go 360 right around the edges and then sort of eat it into a

concentric circle?

I think because probably for the first 10 minutes, he was thinking, why the hell did I agree to do this?

Like, do you have some intel on him, Max?

How did you pull this off?

Some,

what's it called?

Compromato or whatever.

But you're right.

We've really missed a trick.

We need...

I can't text him now going, could you just tell me your tactics?

Can you send us a video of you eating a wagon wheel?

What are you?

Do you think he licks the marshmallow?

He said he loved marshmallow, didn't he?

Does he do that?

I don't know.

Anyway, the thing is, I can't message Gary for a year now.

I've messaged him, thank you.

So what is it, the 8th of April 2025?

If you are listening, Gary, because he does listen to a lot of podcasts, mainly his own and those from his stable.

I will not message you until the 8th 8th of April 2022.

Oh, actually, I should.

I mean, it's a bit late now because I think the listeners will have realised it.

So in addition to being the voice of sport of the BBC, he is now boss man of

basically eight of the UK's biggest podcasts as well.

Do you think he was listening to us thinking, I'll have a listen, see if it's something he wants to bring into his.

We can't, but they can't, he can't afford us.

That's what I'm saying.

It could be.

You know the way big teams play smaller teams in preseason tournaments and then sometimes try and buy their best players.

Yeah.

But if he just comes in, he just comes in for you.

It'll be a bit of a disappointment.

He contacts you.

Hey, Max.

And you're like, oh, yes, Gary.

Do you have David's number?

Anyway, if you'd like to get in touch with the show, we would love to hear from you.

Here's how.

To get in touch with the show, you can email us at whatdidyedo yesterdaypod at gmail.com.

Follow us on Instagram at yesterdaypod.

And please subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform.

And if you didn't, please don't.

Thank you, David.

Let's do it again sometime.

Congratulations on that bookie, Max.

That's great stuff.

Let's do it again soon.

Listen, I said to you, we need more A-listers.

It pissed you off.

it, you know, you were annoyed for a morning, so I just had to take it into my own hands.

And there we are.

And I'll message Stephen Graham and say, come on, Lineker's done it.

Sort yourself out.

Thanks, Max.

Cheers, David.

Hello, Max Rushton here.

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