London Calling

Pattiday presents in the red corner the undisputed, undefeated weed whacker guy,

champion of hurling grass and pollen everywhere.

And in the blue corner, the challenger, extra strength, Pattiday,

eye drops that work all day to prevent the release of histamines that cause itchy, allergy eyes.

And the winner by knockout is Pattiday.

Pattiday, bring it on.

Yeah, Richie, Richie, let's change it up.

Okay.

So, where are we going to eat?

Where do you usually take girls on dates?

Yeah.

It totally depends on how pretty they are.

Oh, my God.

Or I'm a die.

I'm a die.

I'm a die.

Who are these two idiots?

White dude and an Asian dude.

You two are disgusting.

You two are something.

We're bad friends.

Hey.

Yay.

It's the last chance for merch.

Last bit of chance.

We have these hats I wear all the time.

Look how dope these hats are.

Get it now.

Badfriendsmerch.com.

Damn, I don't know what was better.

The zoo or the John Wick Museum?

Best birthday ever.

Well, there's more where that came from.

A word?

Is that the new Bad Friends merch?

Happy birthday to me.

Do you want to touch it?

Can I?

Yeah.

Genuine embroidery.

Oh, yes.

Let's acknowledge the elephant in the room.

Okay, here we go.

Fancy's gone.

And in his place, of course, lingering in the background

is Waldo.

Where is he?

We found him.

Looking at back there.

Look at him right there.

Biting his nails, nervous.

No, that's him.

No.

That's not Waldo?

Look at George in the back.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, George.

Ladies and gentlemen, George has made his triumphant return.

Triumphant.

And, of course, we have Richie is filling in for fancy for the time being.

I've never met Richie.

Have you ever met Richie?

Yeah, we work together.

We do?

Richie works with us.

He does?

He works for us.

I've literally...

Have I ever met you, Richie?

Like twice before, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Where?

Where do we meet each other?

We met him at Seven Eckies.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, I edit all the clips for bad friends and stuff.

Sometimes there's a clip, I'm like, who did this?

Who chose this?

Richie.

Richie, too.

Every time.

Yeah.

And your instinct.

You have instincts?

I try my best to.

Yeah.

Richie.

Yeah, what's up?

Told you you were going to like him.

I love him.

By the way, the first time

you met him at 7 Eckies, you know what you did?

You tussled his hair.

I did?

Yeah, you tussled his hair.

Yeah.

And you said, keep on keeping on.

Oh, that's right.

So he got that tattooed.

Keep on keeping on.

Oh, you did?

Yeah.

It's on my ass.

Okay.

He's married.

He has six kids.

Do you have kids, really?

They're all how many?

Three.

Holy moly.

He's a machine.

His wife is Cambodian.

She is?

You like it, though?

Yeah.

Yeah, he likes it.

You can play the killing fields with that game.

I love that.

Do you play that game with her?

She wears the hat and, you know.

And you're Pol Pot?

No?

I'm Pol Pot sometimes.

In bed.

Yeah.

You know who Pot Pot?

Whoa.

Whoa.

You knew who Pol Pot is?

Like a dictator, I think.

Emphasis on dick, my dear.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Top 10, probably one of the most horrifying dictators

of all time.

Of all time.

And he's also sponsoring the show.

This episode of Bad Friends is brought to you by Bob.

But Killing Fields.

And Killing Fields.

So, wait a minute, though.

I post a video of Fancy crying, like just bawling, crying, laughing.

You guys went to get food.

You guys went to go to a restaurant.

And then.

no, it's McCone's fault.

McCone got yeah, so this is what happened, okay?

I'm gonna tell you what happened.

Tell me, I went through the gate way before everyone else, right?

And sometimes I'll go, I'm eating at this place, right?

There were two seats open next to me.

It's at, it's not a table, it's like a bar, a bar.

Yeah.

So then, you know, um, McCone and Andrea sit next to me.

And we order, I, I've already, I've already ordered a traditional breakfast.

A traditional breakfast with eggs, bacon, right, and an orange juice.

Right.

And

in front of us is a gigantic kind of like menu that's leaning against the wall.

And on the menu is this chocolatey thing that only 12-year-old kids get.

Right.

It's got 16 pieces of chocolate stuck in it, right?

Whipped cream.

You know what I mean?

A thick straw.

It's just this thing that you, why would anyone get that for a breakfast?

And why would they?

Yeah.

But he orders it.

Of course, of course he does.

After he orders his original meal,

he orders it later.

He goes, excuse me,

is this available?

And in my mind, I'm like, why would you get that?

He gets it.

Of course.

Right.

Of course, this thing is taller than average drinks.

And there's a straw sticking out.

Right?

So me and Fancy share, we share pancakes often.

Yeah.

That's our little hobby.

I go, yo,

Andreas, pass me the pancakes.

He hands it to me, and

and then I'm looking away, and the pancake plate hits the straw of this chocolatey drink.

It spills all over all my body, the backpack, everything.

It's chaos.

But also, the only reason it was in front of you is because you took a sip.

I didn't even get a sip.

Before my first sip, you're like, let me try this.

And you put it right in front of you.

Okay, yeah.

All right.

So he didn't even get the drink.

No.

So really, it was yours.

Yeah.

Technically.

Check it out.

You paid for it and you spilled it and you were the only one that drank it.

Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah.

Technically, it's yours.

So now I'm drenched in this sticky, thick fluid.

Chocolate.

Chocolate.

Brownies in it.

Yeah, yeah.

It's bad.

Yeah.

It's all sugar.

Why would you get that?

That's his fault.

It looks so good on the picture.

Yeah.

So you have such a deprived child.

Yeah, yeah.

So now my backpack is drenched with this chocolatey thing.

I'm drenched with it.

Yeah.

So what does one do?

I look at the immediate first clothing store.

Yes.

It was like a sports store, right?

Yeah.

And I bought a complete different outfit.

You bought an Arsenal jersey and you bought a job.

And I don't know why he laughed the way he did.

Well, because he saw you trying it on, and he says in this video, you might be able to hear it.

Calm down.

Just say it.

Bubby opens their feet and rolls completely naked.

Look at the tags.

So you're butt naked and you open the fitting room door and they're there because you want scissors.

Can I defend myself real quick?

Cut the tags off.

Can I defend myself real quick?

Sure.

It was just a prank.

It was a ploy.

What do you mean?

Because I had a fart brewing and I knew the tags were in the back of these new pants.

Sure.

So I was going to turn around and him grab it.

He had to lower himself too.

You know what I mean?

And then I would fart in his face.

But it never happened.

It never happened because they didn't have scissors.

No, yeah.

You have made me pull them off manually.

Yeah, yeah.

I go do it manually.

But did you fart on him while he was?

Yeah,

so it did get pulled off.

I pulled it off.

All right, good.

I did pull it off, but I did answer the door.

But can I just defend myself real quick?

Sure.

It's not as if I didn't look below and see what feet are in front of the.

Yeah.

I memorized the shoes.

It was our friend.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, you can always tell fancy shoes.

They're 12-year-old boy shoes.

Yeah, yeah.

They're little boy Velcro.

So I opened it up, and then lo and behold, there's other people watching as well.

But I'm in my underwear, so I'm not completely naked.

Okay.

Right.

I don't know why he would react like this.

It was so funny.

And you also had me buy 12 wet wipe packages.

Yeah.

Well, you need 12.

Yeah.

Because one is not enough.

One was enough.

It was?

Yeah.

So we gave 11 to the waitress.

And she couldn't believe it.

She was not about to accept your tip.

It took a lot of finessing for you to.

Do you know why?

Because this lady gets on her knees with, you know, a towel and stuff.

It's just wiping down my backpack and the ground.

She doesn't need to do that, and you tipped her, yeah, yeah.

What did you give her?

It took 100 bucks, yeah, it took like 10 minutes for yeah, she went down, and we didn't ask for that.

Why did you, what did you ever say, stop, you don't have to do that?

I kept going, you know, she says, No, it's my job, it's my job, and I had to get, I had to tip her.

You have to, yeah, yeah.

And so then I had him go get me wet naps.

You got a little bit more than I asked.

You asked for $60 worth.

I don't know how much in Europe what wetnaps cost.

I don't don't think you know what they cost here.

I know.

I don't think it's.

I don't know how much they cost.

So I bought like 12 of them.

He got a lot.

He got a lot.

Cover my bases.

Well,

at least you were generous and you helped her out.

Yeah.

You know who you are when we're on vacation or we're on trips like this?

You are,

bring up,

bring up Jim Carrey, Dumb and Dumber,

handing out cash.

Here you go.

There you go.

There you go.

There you go.

There you go.

I mean, that is, and I'm complimenting you.

We would go, we got a ride from the house car at the hotel, and he handed him a hundred dollar bill.

And it's nice, very generous.

And the guy goes, thank you, sir.

And then we took it the car again.

10 minutes later, gave him another $100 bill.

I was like, how much fucking money are you going to give this guy?

He drove us a mile down the road.

That's like Uber platinum.

I'm going to defend myself real quick.

I'm complimenting you.

No, it sounds gross, but I'll tell you what.

Well, no, it's awesome.

I'm saying it was funny the way you were so generous.

Can I just say something?

I don't have a lot of money, so let me just say something, okay?

What I want to say is this.

At the comedy, we go up at the comedy store.

How many times am I at the comedy store?

Too many.

A lot.

Yeah.

And they're every night.

Every night.

Basically a house comic there.

Yeah.

Okay.

So every two weeks, I take that money.

So what I'm giving people isn't like money out of my bank account or anything like that.

It's like that's that's just, you know, because we do like bringer rooms.

They'll give you cash.

Like, here's $300, $400, right?

I don't spend that on anything.

I do it.

I use that as tips.

Shadow cash.

Shadow class.

Cash.

Yeah.

It's not as if I'm like, you know what I mean, rolling in it and I'm like, you know what I mean?

Here's money for everybody.

No, it's just like shadow money.

It's like, you know what's another shadow money?

Sometimes it arises.

What the fuck is shadow money?

I made it up.

Yeah, what does that even mean?

I don't know.

I like it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shadow money.

It's money that, you know.

When my wife wife is like, why did you buy that?

I'm like, baby, it's shadow money.

Yeah.

It's shadow money.

It's shadow money.

What does that say?

Refers to a concept with a financial system that includes money like claims created through a repurchase operations and other non-banking official intermediaries.

Well, shadow money, baby.

In a way, I guess that that doesn't make sense.

I don't know what that meant, but yeah.

It makes perfect sense.

Yeah.

Playing a crucial role in the shadow banking system.

It's a broader concept just for an illicit finance and can income as legitimate, albeit less regulated financial activities.

Shadow money, baby.

Yeah.

It's a legitimate term.

Yeah.

So I use that.

Did you hear that somewhere?

No.

This is insane that it's a real thing.

You know when you guess something and you're like, I'm probably wrong.

And it's right.

And you're like, well, fuck.

Well, sometimes I like to make my

makeup terminology.

Yeah, you do all the time.

Yeah, I do it all the time.

I don't know if it makes sense or not.

Shadow money makes perfect sense to me.

But I've always called it shadow money.

And so.

Well, you were shadowing out a lot.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You shadowed a lot.

Be honest with you.

You know what I used to spend shadow money on?

Huh?

Strip clubs.

That is shadow money.

Yeah.

So it's like.

Well, that's what it's literally saying right there.

You know, that stuff goes to like cat litter.

Right.

You know what I mean?

Like, I'll spend money on cat litter and cat stuff and dog stuff.

That's out of the shadows money.

Or pool.

Like, I get a cleaning guy to come over once a week to clean my pool.

Does he do a good job?

Yeah.

He does.

I have a small pool.

I don't think they ever do a good job.

I think it's a lie.

Yeah.

I need a poop picker-upper.

Well, Richie is here.

Oh, I got you.

Yeah.

That's right.

How do you get it on?

Yeah, really?

Richie,

would you go clean up all the cat poop at his house?

For a good price.

What would the price be, do you think?

To just clean up cat poop around an apartment.

Just cat poop and dog poop around the outside.

Honestly, that's like, I would take minimum wage for that.

What is minimum wage that you'd accept?

California.

California minimum wage is pretty high.

Honestly, I'd take like $15 for that.

That's not that bad.

$6.50 an hour.

Yeah, honestly, that, yeah.

But you could get it done in one hour.

So you're getting paid $16.

No, it would take 10 minutes.

Okay, right.

So here's what I would do, Richie.

Richie, I would go, here's

for you to drive over to where do you live?

In what area?

Like, just say east, north, what, south, west?

Cambodia.

We talked.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So far for the south.

East, east, yeah, yeah.

No, in LA, east side, west side, north, or south.

I'm in Burbank.

Okay.

I don't know east, south, yeah, yeah, I'm not going to win with the wreck.

She's not going to go to Rex.

Exactly.

So we're figuring that out.

So Burbank to my house.

We'll get your software system.

I would probably give you to drive all the way from Burbank to my house 50 bucks to clean my dog poo.

That's good.

I would do that.

Yeah.

Let's let's let's instate this.

Yeah.

And also,

but I will say this: this is the innocence of how sweet Richie is.

Richie helps and does clips for me and stuff on the side.

And I said, Hey, Rich, I need you to do some other clip stuff.

Can you help me out?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

How much do you want for the clip?

He's like,

like $10.

He low balls.

I was like, $10?

Yeah.

To do work?

Yeah.

I go, do I'll give you $10 right now.

Let me help.

Let me give me the, you know, no, no.

No big deal.

So what?

So are the kids starving?

Yeah.

I was like, Rich.

You're really doing the killing fields, huh?

For real.

How about this?

You go to the house and clean up poop.

You get yourself $100.

$100?

I do that easy.

Wait, wait, you're speaking on my behalf?

That's right.

Yeah.

I'm your business manager.

Okay.

Yeah, okay.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Yeah, yeah.

It's shadow money, baby.

It's shadow money.

Okay.

Okay.

You do it?

I'm there.

Okay.

God, that's great.

Now I'm questioning what he's willing to do for money.

What are you willing to do for money?

What aren't I willing to do for money?

Wow.

More interesting.

Yeah, more interesting.

Would you.

Are you good with woodwork?

Can you woodwork?

I could figure out woodwork.

Are you good at escape rooms?

I could escape.

Okay.

Do you have a secret talent of some kind?

No, I.

No.

Do you not have a hidden talent at all that we don't know?

No, honestly.

Can you whistle?

My talent is

this at best.

That's a talent?

Everybody can fucking whistle.

I can't whistle.

You don't know how to whistle?

Let me try.

There it is.

Okay.

Whistle.

Yeah, that's not a talent.

Can you gleek?

Gleeking is cool.

Under your tongue?

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm King Gleek.

How do I do it?

You curl your tongue.

Yeah, you can't get it.

You have to load some spit under there.

Gleeks were cool to do.

Remember gleeking on someone in Spain?

Oh, I can kind of do that.

Yeah, gleeking's cool.

Yeah.

I can gleek.

All right, what else?

Can you do put your hands together and make music?

I'm like, fart.

Wait.

Hold on.

Let me hear that again.

That's pretty good.

Can you do that?

No.

Yeah, you can.

Try.

You can't.

I can't.

Okay.

You can't do that.

What else can you do?

I see why they got you on reservation, reservation, Doc.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

What else could you do?

Nothing much, huh?

No, I mean, like, I do this.

This is my.

Juggle.

Can you juggle?

I could do my...

Yeah, no, no, don't give him some.

Do you dance?

Do you dance?

Are you a dancer?

I mean, I got some solid.

I got some okay moves.

Can I be honest with you?

I do Andres.

I really miss Andres.

Yeah.

I know.

I'm kidding.

Richie, I love you.

We love you.

I think you're great.

You're here to stay.

Oh, thank you.

And all jokes aside, you don't have a girlfriend.

You're single, right?

I actually just got rejected like this week.

Wait, you're not married and have kids?

Sorry.

Come on, man.

Come on, sit down.

Fuck you, dude.

I really thought.

You thought the 23-year-old kid had three kids with a woman from Cambodia?

I saw Amish documentary where this kid was 22 and had like six kids or something.

No, man.

You have nothing.

You just got rejected?

No, I just got rejected.

I bought concert tickets, tickets, and we were kind of talking, and I thought it would be a good gesture.

And then she did.

What concert?

It depends on what the concert is.

Yeah.

I got weird Al.

That's a rad concert.

It goes on.

That's what I thought.

It's a cool, that's really cool.

I saw them.

I bought them instantly.

I thought it was a really good idea.

Dude, this kid, this is like, you remember those things when we were kids?

There were tiny little squishy things, and you put them in the tub and they expanded?

Yeah.

What were those things called?

Whatever that was, that's like Richie is that to McCone.

Like, he's just getting the tub.

He'll expand.

They're the same kind of thing.

You can do it with gummy bears.

You can?

You can put a gummy bear

in a bowl with water, and it'll grow overnight.

I want to do that.

Yeah, yeah.

Richie, so you bought Weird L tickets.

How much did you spend?

Not that much.

I mean, like, $75, something like that.

Which is like pretty good for two tickets.

Wow.

Two tickets, $75.

Which is not that bad.

Did you go solo?

Well, it still hasn't happened yet.

So

I need to find some weird out with.

It's at the end of August.

Richie, did you get backstage at least?

No.

Do you know at Weird Al?

Pretty, not great tickets.

You know, pretty far away.

Let me tell you something real fast.

Yeah.

All the ladies at home that are looking for a good man, he's six feet tall.

That's taller than the average male.

He's got a yearly income of.

Don't worry about it.

Never mind, but he can take you to Weird Al.

What kind of car do you drive?

No car.

That's even better.

George drove me.

George drove you.

That's embarrassing.

But, but, but he's at.

But you know what?

How about this?

If there's a young young lady that's willing to go on a date with Richie to go to this weird Eliak concert, we'll set it up.

We'll set them up with a nice car and everything.

We'll do that.

You will.

Huh?

You will.

Sure.

Okay.

Look at me.

We're not going to do that.

No, no, no.

But seriously, girls, if you're interested in this gentleman, he got blown off.

He got stood up.

That's awful and gross, right?

You got rejected.

Please email carlosinthebooth at gmail.com.

And if you live in Los Angeles, he can take you.

You just have to submit a video saying why you'd like to go on a a date with Richard.

What's your full name?

Is your full name Richard?

It's Richard, but I always go by Richie.

Everyone always calls me Richie.

Yeah, so if you want to go on a date with Richard.

Can I ask?

Is there a dinner involved?

You've got to take him to dinner.

Of course.

Not before Weird Al, they'll throw up

laughing.

But where would you bring this person?

I guess somewhere around the.

Okay, I'm a girl.

So, Richie, I've never heard of Weird Al, but is it going to be good?

It'll be great.

Oh, he's going to sing Yoda at the end.

That's my favorite one.

What?

Anyway, i'm pretty hungry are we gonna eat something yeah let's go to in n out

yeah in n out is good in and out

yeah if you're high at one in the morning

it is good yeah yeah so where are we going richie

uh a dime we're going to like like you know grandville and burbank yeah i go to is it good it's a good spot it's a it's a yeah it's a it's like that's like the best i can do yeah it's like a nice it's like a nice chain oh it's a chain it's a nice chain yeah it's a nice

yeah Oh, yeah.

I've seen that driving by the street.

Yeah.

It's like what Panera Bread wishes it could be.

Oh, I see.

Do you know what I'm saying?

It's a nice chain.

So, Granville, you would go.

Oh, yeah.

Granville's nice.

It cooked good apples.

What's the best place you can take, though?

Somebody?

Granville.

You let him come over and clean up poop.

He'll be able to take it.

I was going to say, I could get a little better date.

I'll just give you the money.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

So, how about this?

No, Granville's nice.

It's like a nice chain.

Okay, good, good, good.

But if she's not hot, where does she go?

In and out.

Yeah, in and out, BK.

So you judge the meal on the look.

No, not always.

So how are you going to.

So we're going to get you a car, pick you up, and then pick her up, and then we've got to get you a car back from the weirdo?

Why don't we just give him someone's car?

Carlos!

He's got to use your car to go on a date.

He has to use your car.

Okay, great.

Wait, but do you have a license, dude?

I do have a license.

All right.

I just don't have a car.

Yeah.

Yeah, we're good.

He'll use Carlos's car.

You know what?

But here's the only stipulation.

Carlos has to go with you on the date.

And the whole time, he's going to be trying to fuck the girl.

Yeah.

So good luck.

And added an element of challenge.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's too easy, otherwise.

It's too easy.

You can't get set up by bad friends and not.

So Carlos will be with you on the date trying to hook up.

I'll blue chew, too.

Or you sabotage it by not going to Granville and go to Mastro's.

Oh, and make him pay.

No, and just go, oh, you can't afford this?

I'll get it.

Oh, that'd be good.

Oh, that'd be a good one.

Carlos, how dare you?

Yeah, yeah, that'd be a good one.

I do want to do that.

That's kind of tight.

And then

instead of weird out, you're like, oh, I'm going to Coldplay.

No, oh, no.

Oasis.

London.

Let's get on a plane now.

Let's get on a plane now.

That's hot.

But I only have two tickets.

Sorry, Rich.

Sorry, Rich.

What would you do?

Get revenge, Rich?

I would say Weird Al's playing Yoda in the Encore.

We can't miss it.

How many times have you seen Weird Al?

Never.

I can't wait.

That's huge.

I'm really excited.

Where is he playing?

The green.

He's got a Kia Forum.

What?

What?

Wow.

He can sell the Kia Forum.

Yes, sir.

Wow.

You're a diehard woo-oh.

I love it.

He's into it.

He's into it.

I've been dying to go.

Yeah.

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What?

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I wish I...

You don't you know him?

No, I've never met him.

No, I have met him.

Yes, I have met him.

Super nice, Christian.

Reach out.

I don't know him in that way.

Because imagine if this guy could take somebody backstage.

Yeah.

Are you a Yankovic fan at home, ladies?

You got to hit up Carlos in the booth at gmail.com to get this guy to take you to a show.

You got to live in the LA metropolitan area.

Okay.

Can't be someone that when we get some of the emails, they're like, I live in Yucaipa.

You're like, what?

I don't know what the fuck that is.

Do you live alone?

Yeah.

Studio apartment.

Wow.

Hell yeah.

Wow.

This is nice.

It's nice.

What is Batano?

Batano.

What's Batano?

What is that?

I don't know what that is, but I know what this is.

And this is Arsenal FC, guys.

You got an Arsenal jersey.

It's a Slept King in the back.

And thank you to London.

Thank you for London.

Thank you for London.

London.

We had a really fun time with you guys.

Can I get some stuff off my chest?

Go for it.

How about London and Europe?

Yeah, do it.

Yeah.

Two things.

I've been listening to a lot of ROM DOS.

Have you really?

Yeah, the spiritual

spirit, the teacher.

Yeah.

And I've been trying to meditate, and it's all because of Europe.

Yep.

Some things occurred.

What happened in Europe?

Well,

you and I had our issue, but I'm not going to talk about that.

But I'm going to talk about...

We didn't have an issue.

Okay.

I had a gripe.

We had a gripe, but that's mended.

And what did I say to you in the hallway?

After the gripe?

Yeah.

Post-gripe.

I'll never do that again.

And?

I'm sorry.

And?

I love you.

Yeah.

Okay.

And I think that's the best best three beats.

It is.

Hallelujah.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know who was in that order.

Oh, you're right.

You know what it was?

Yeah.

You know how much I love you.

Yes.

And I'm really sorry, and that won't happen again.

So it was in that exact order.

That's okay because we're partners.

You know what I mean?

But we're also brothers.

And we're also sisters.

Sister, sister.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They should remake it with us.

Yeah, yeah.

Sister, sister.

The Tale of Two Sisters.

That's another horror movie that's a Korean movie.

Did you see it?

Let's go back to

my gripes with the gripe, gripe, gripe, gripe, gripe.

Gripe, gripe.

Gripe, gripe, gripe.

All right.

Okay, there you go.

The week leading up to the gripes.

Why are you nodding your head, Richie?

You weren't there.

I didn't want to know about the gripes.

He's interested in the gripes.

Yeah.

All right.

So

it was a great week.

We went shopping in London.

We did.

Yeah.

Really good meals.

Delicious.

And what a beautiful city.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Um, my wife got her phone stolen on day one.

Yeah, that was tough, very, a very London experience, yeah, yeah.

You had a rough experience in London, a little bit.

We landed in London, we got robbed the first night, and you know what?

I've been protecting, I protected my phone so badly.

Well, I told you, I was like, dude, they're ready to

look at the look at the amount of iPhones stolen in London on a daily basis.

I mean, honestly, it's a joke, but continue your gripe.

Let me get gripe first and then we'll do the London.

Gripe it out, dog.

Okay.

So, um, the first gripe was um when I first landed.

Oh, okay, gripe it out.

Okay, can I ask you what, do you know what it was?

There was no car waiting?

No, I'm fine with that.

Are you?

If you're going to gripe.

Oh, all right.

Gripe.

We'll talk about some of my things then.

Gripe.

All right.

So, um.

We've had tour managers before.

We have.

Okay.

And I want to name her name.

She's great.

We love her.

And when we're in a city ready to go

to the gig or a hotel or whatever, there's a car waiting for us.

There is, yeah.

Okay.

When somebody else is tour managing, I don't want to name the person, right?

We have to get in a gypsy cap.

And we have to wait two hours.

Okay.

You know,

it's a little different.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's different.

And also the, look at his face.

Who?

Richie?

Yeah, yeah.

So, but that's not my first gripe.

Well, why don't you say, okay,

with somebody.

Who is it?

McCone.

Go ahead.

I talked to Whitney.

I talked to Burt.

I talked to a bunch of people about this.

Name somebody legitimate.

Okay.

Gerard Butler.

I love him.

I love him.

Tell your little story later.

Okay.

About Gerard Butler?

Yeah.

Yeah.

He loves you.

Okay.

Move on.

I swear to God, he loves you.

Brother, I've done this to you.

I've lied to you and said this person loves you.

And he's like, I'm your mom.

Right.

Shut up.

That's your line.

Shut up, dude.

why are you blushing

i know what's coming okay

and i said we're in the car and you know mccone is the videographer and you know you're trying to look at the buildings you know it's a city i haven't been to in 20 years right and i'm in i'm in awe i'm taking it i'm taking in the history you're always taking it in i'm looking at the parliament i'm looking at the you know big benefit i'm looking at the statues you know the history where the beatles played on that rooftop we love that Right.

And there's a camera in my face.

Now,

at one point, I was like, you know what?

Put it down because it's kind of like distracting me.

I want to, you know.

And he goes, no.

I go, I'm serious, McCullough.

Just put it down because I'm trying to enjoy.

It's kind of, you know, nope.

I go, yeah, do it.

No.

I go, why?

He goes, because Andrew said no.

So then I look at him and I go, but you know, it's half my podcast, right?

He goes, I don't care.

Andrew said, no.

The balls.

Right.

So now, everyone listening right now, this is what I have to do now.

I got to call Andrew to call McCone to say no.

That's right.

Right.

Now, did I say shove a camera in his face?

And when he says, stop, don't stop.

I never said that.

No, but there's a history on tour where, Bob, you like to, you know, okay, put the camera down.

But it's like for the bit.

And like, you're always, you're, you're, you're, you're a good actor.

Sometimes I don't know what's real and what's fake.

And I thought you were doing manipulation at this highest order.

This is Fargo shit.

I re-watch Fargo.

You're Minnesota people, dude.

It's Fargo shit.

They all manipulate.

Yeah, they manipulate.

You act all instant, but then you're shooting somebody in the face.

But they're putting people on wood shooting.

I wish Emmy wasn't from Minnesota.

The shooters weren't from Minnesota.

Here's the deal.

Did you hear that tone, though?

I heard it.

Okay, thank you.

I heard it right now.

He just did it literally right now.

That tone was no when he was in the car.

Right.

No, and I do apologize for that.

Okay.

And I never told you to keep rolling when he says stop.

Yeah.

Well, yeah.

Also,

what?

There have been times where I'll look over when Bobby's like, stop.

And I'll look to you and you go.

Yeah.

If it's fun.

I know.

And this was so fun.

We were going by buildings.

He was like, he was like, ah, it looks like Auschwitz.

He was just throwing out gold constantly.

That's gold?

It's bronze.

The point is.

McCone,

and Bobby and I had a real conversation about it.

McCone is there to do, that is his job, but he kept doing too much of his job when you asked him to not do his job.

And how is he being punished?

And I'll tell you, he's been sleeping at the studio.

That's right.

No, no, I'm not kidding.

I know, I know what the story came in this morning.

I know the story to go get stuff.

Yeah, and he's sleeping here.

He's sleeping on the couch in the studio.

Yeah.

And I was like, hey, buddy.

And he goes, hey.

I go, what are you doing?

I couldn't.

I guess this is where I had to go.

I said, do you need somewhere to sleep, dude?

No, I kind of like it here.

Yeah.

So he's self, he's self-bashing.

He's doing it to punish himself.

Well, the apartment that he has, something happened.

There was a gas leak or what happened?

It's, it was built in like 1906, and they're repainting it, so they sanded, and now there's just lead paint dust in everywhere because they didn't properly cover our windows.

And his landlord legally has to give him money to go somewhere else.

And his landlord was like, no.

Wow.

And then my renter's insurance doesn't cover any of that either.

Wow, so you're staying here?

Yeah.

Okay.

You're taking a shower at your house tomorrow.

No, where'd you shower today?

I didn't shower today.

Let him stay at your house.

No, I already have three Filipinos staying there.

What's one more Minnesota?

Yeah.

All right.

So

that

established the.

No, hold on, hold on.

That argument, though, of like, you thought I was joking.

Yeah.

Maybe the first time, but I said it like three or four times.

And then it got to the point.

Then it got to the point where I had to actually call Andrew.

At that point, you would think that I wasn't joking.

No, I know.

And then I stopped.

He did stop that?

After Andrew called you to say that.

That's right.

I told him.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The people that I've talked to about this, that's fireable.

Well, what do you think?

Do you want to fire him?

No, I don't.

But I think the moral is we reached an agreement where we established a safe word, which he did.

And I think it's a great idea.

First of all, that was for you.

I said, let's have a safe word when you really don't want to be filmed.

Can this be the safe word?

Stop?

No, because stop.

Why is stop not the safe word anymore?

Because stop with you is playful

it's got to be a word it's here's the thing

when you're having when you're playing character sex with someone you're having sex with i love that and they have to have a safe word that's off beat so they know it has nothing to do with what's going on yeah like like ricky tikki tembo no sorrembo you have to do that and i'm not that's not a

that's an asian thing but it's not an asian thing well that's the first gripe maybe move on to the second gripe too okay

where is carlos by the way you're getting

this next gripe is about you.

And this one

was.

Oh

my God.

I could not believe it.

Go on.

I will.

Because I've got some.

I've got some.

You got one?

Well, I have something to talk to him about.

Yeah.

This one was.

Huh?

What happened?

Let him feel a bit.

Dude.

You know what happened.

What happened?

All right.

Not with him.

I don't know.

No, but with me.

Do you know what happened with me?

Yeah, you made a huge deal about it.

When?

When?

In Ireland.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We got in

Tiff.

No, we didn't get in Tiff.

You got a Tiff.

Oh, yeah.

I forgot.

When I said, Are you mad?

You said, I'm not mad.

Which very scary.

Which means he's mad.

Yeah.

It's very scary.

It's like when you say stop, but you don't want to.

It's Jedi mind tricks.

You do a little Jedi.

Yeah, if you're a Padawan, you grow up in that life.

Gripe.

Gripe two.

Gripe two, Padawan.

Okay, here we go.

So, um,

I just want to tell people listening, hello.

And banjour.

Good.

Okay.

And what I want to also say is this: is that,

you know, when you're on a tour, right?

We don't eat all day.

Well, you, you usually don't.

Yeah, but still, I mean, a lot of the people's complaint is after the show.

Food.

Yeah, like, we're hungry.

And so, um, what the other tour manager would do, okay.

The thing I did in London the first night.

Did he?

Getting a little sticky.

Did he?

He did.

Yeah, it's where you ate Nessa.

No, that's not true.

You know who came up with that?

Your friend.

My friend.

Hmm.

Do you remember that?

I do.

Yeah, yeah.

I had reservations.

No, no, no.

She did it.

I was in the car when she called.

Like, can we get a table of 15?

Oh, I'm talking about the night before.

I'm talking about show night.

Okay.

I'm talking about show night.

Yeah, but we can't let go of like other nights I did for you.

No, but the other nights, we can figure that out.

Wait, we talked about gripe zero, which was that you didn't like your seat on the plane because it was business and not first, even though they have the same seats.

Oh, God, dude.

I didn't have a gripe on that.

How dare you?

My only complaint is that Robin Thick was in first.

Yeah, you were mad because Robin Thick was in first.

You did say that.

That's not the gripe.

The gripe is this.

You said,

why the fuck is Robin Thick at first and I'm not?

Well, he cut ahead of me.

I'm in line for first.

He cut ahead of me.

I go, why the fuck is Robin Thick going cutting ahead of me?

He's so famous.

I know, but he's so handsome, too.

All right.

I don't mind following Robin Lick.

I can't even fucking talk.

Robin Thick into the plane, but I had to wait another 20.

Anyway, stop.

Stop.

You're right.

Move on.

Here's another thing about that plane, okay?

Is it the, I've never been on a plane like it.

Where you're facing, so I'm facing this way and there's a dude facing this way right and our heads are this close like his head's right here and we're right and there's a little wall that you can pull up but you can't pull that up until the flight takes off right right so I'm just kind of and he's coughing

right and I'm like and then I go can I bring the and they're like no not until

now I can't you know it's weird I get it so I complain about that I'm sorry okay but I'm grateful for the flight yeah no problem gripe go on on.

All right, let's go to gripe.

Because I'm going to wedge mine in real fast.

You want to do it now?

Night one.

I said.

Okay.

He's bouncing around.

Ooh.

You know.

Carlos?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I said, are you high?

Oh, here we go.

And what did you say to me?

Oh, I said no, but that's because I forgot I was high.

No, no.

No, no.

No.

That's too high.

No.

If you're so high, you forgot you're high.

Yeah.

That's high.

It's because I took all my edibles on the plane when we landed because I thought we were going to go through customs.

I said, first of all, I told you not to bring anything through.

Yeah, but it's fine in the air.

Okay.

Okay.

I said, are you hi.

International.

And you said no.

And then McCone ratted you out and said, he bought weed from a guy in the park.

Oh, no, that was Brad.

He gave it to me.

Okay.

Yeah.

Gave you weed in the park.

And you smoked weed with him in the park.

Yeah, it was fun.

It was like a real British experience.

It was like Ted Last.

What's British about smoking weed in the park?

That's a British thing?

Yeah, it it was British grass that we were sitting on.

All right.

It is British grass.

I get it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've never had British grass.

God save the country.

Back to Mike Ripe.

Ripen.

Okay.

So.

Sorry, Andrew, about forgetting.

I can't believe I fucking did that.

Okay.

No, it's okay.

I just wanted you to tell me the truth.

No, I mean, I'm always going to be honest with you.

If I forget, it's just the brain sometimes goes, man.

I understand.

Thank you.

So, we're in Dublin.

Okay.

And

lovely city.

Oh, my God.

Lovely city.

That hotel.

Lovely city.

I went back twice for that lunch.

I know you ate it the same.

Yeah.

This is all Papa needs for nutrients.

Okay.

So you had food at your hotel already?

You could have just went there and ate breakfast.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Okay.

I see what he's doing.

He's good today.

I just want to let you know how the human body works.

Okay.

There's something called breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Yeah, it goes breakfast,

lunch, dinner.

And since we're in Europe, you get a second breakfast.

Always.

Yeah.

You have to.

You always have to.

Okay.

So, yes, I had lunch twice, two days in a row, at the hotel.

What do you call it?

Cafe.

Cafe, yeah.

Okay.

Soft sandwiches,

tomato soup, little side cheese plate, some greens, and a beverage of some sort.

Yeah.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

Okay.

So, and I ran into that old

Joe Walsh.

Remember I told you?

Crazy, you ran into Joe Walsh.

I'm outside.

Do you hear about that?

I'm outside of the hotel and I'm smoking a cigarette and I've just been thinking about you because this is the day after.

This is when I'm waiting for my car to the airport.

The BMW X5.

Go on.

What is he doing?

I'll tell him something.

He booked a Pussus.

Anyway, Joe Walsh.

He booked a fucking Prius for me to go back to the airport.

He booked a Prius.

I have five bags.

I've been gone for three weeks.

He booked a Prius.

The Prius shows up, and I go, I can't get in this.

andrew they don't want priuses on the black lane side hey hey hey bob it was a prius i believe you it was a prius wholeheartedly my friend

i'm on your side it was a prius andrew i'm on your side too i think we should call corporate it was a prius and i go i don't think my luggage can fit in there there's my wife and i have five bags we've been traveling for three weeks go ahead

when i get when it get gripes my ear itches

yeah

okay um command do mine go for it all right so the show's over.

It's about 8.30.

I've been working 14 hours.

Yeah, that's your job.

The job entitles a lot of things.

It's a big job.

It's a big job, sir.

Okay.

So

Andreas is there with us.

Yes, he is.

And no joke, I turned to him and I go,

what are we going to go eat?

He's like,

we don't have, you know, plan, you know?

Richie, do an impression?

We don't have a plan to go to the restaurant.

Perfect.

Very good.

Yeah, very good.

Or French, but fine.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

French, French, Spain.

They touch.

And I go, well, that's interesting because, you know, usually a tour manager

sets it up.

Right.

And he goes, I'll be right back.

And he, I guess, goes to Carlos and goes, Babby is telling me, you know what I mean?

To get that, you should already have that arranged.

Right.

So now we're talking to...

By the way,

that show was amazing in Dublin.

It's great.

Yeah.

We had these dancers go up on stage.

The Irish dancers.

The Irish dancers.

So fun.

We danced with them.

I loved it.

And it was pure joy.

It was magic.

It crushed it, too.

Yeah, it was magic.

So afterwards, I'm with there's three Irish lady dancers, a male,

and we're chatting it up.

We're chatting it upstairs.

We're razzing.

Yo, what a victory.

Yeah.

Big double.

Yeah, yeah.

And you know, we're hugging, and all of a sudden, this is what I hear, and I'm not making this up.

Fuck you, Bobby!

That is, yeah, I know that's the tone.

That was the tone.

That's the tone.

That's not the words I said.

Oh, what was the real words?

I'm sorry.

I saw the movie once.

What were the words?

Yeah, I wasn't there for this.

I have no idea.

I'm working, Bobby.

I'm working, Bobby.

But there were some swears.

No, there were no swears.

It was just tone.

You were right on tone.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And he's screaming at me, right?

Yeah.

With I'm with these people.

Oh, wow.

You know what I mean?

In front of friends.

In front of friends.

Right.

Workmates.

Right.

Cohorts, if I may.

Cohorts, yeah.

yeah yeah show the show biz experience it's like an aaron sorkin show backstage okay

trying to

it's like studio

and when he did that i calmly walked up to you it was horrifying and i go

are you out of your mind

don't ever talk to me like that again okay yeah if you would have done that to anybody that was the artist,

a road manager, out the window.

Out the window.

Right?

I don't know why you're nodding your head, McCone.

Same thing.

Okay.

Yeah, you're on probation as well.

The fuck are you?

Yeah, yeah.

What are you doing?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Rocket money.

Oh, Andrew, I've saved so much money on Rocket Money.

You know why?

Because Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

There are some like photo apps and games and stuff that have subscriptions on that just bleed money.

Oh yeah.

But what is Rocket Money?

Rocket Money has it on an interface where you can just easily cancel all of it.

It's so simple.

It shows you how much money that you've been wasting.

They help try to negotiate your bills to lower them for you.

The app automatically scans your bills to find opportunity to save and then goes to work to get you better deals.

They'll even talk to customer service so you don't have to.

That's right.

It's the best part.

The dashboard lays everything out, a total financial picture.

It is very simple.

You need to get it.

Rocket Money's 5 million members have saved a total of 500 million and canceled subscriptions, with members saving up to $740 a year when they use all the app's premium features.

You know, and a lot of people, Bob, a lot of people, myself included, paid for stuff and I didn't know it was reoccurring subscription base.

So it's like I just didn't know these charges were happening until I checked it out with Rocket Money.

And thankfully, they're able to clear it all up and get rid of that stuff that I haven't used in forever.

Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money.

Go to rocketmoney.com/slash bad friends today.

That's rocketmoney.com slash bad friends.

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It's like the dog.

Remember, you're like, who who ate my slipper and one?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Or the guilty dog is just.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, so that's what you're doing.

Yeah.

So the only person in the window not on probation is Richie.

Yeah, yeah.

Richie's the best.

Yeah.

And so what I want to say is, I,

after that, I went to my dressing room.

No one's in there.

And I sat down and I just literally went,

yeah,

I think

I can't do this.

Right.

Like,

I'm being real.

I just can't do this.

You know?

And

it was the first time I ever felt that where I was like,

do we want to change things up?

You know what I mean?

Do you?

Not with you and I.

No, no, with

them.

No.

Good.

I'll tell you why.

Ram Das.

What did Ram Dass teach you?

I don't remember.

Okay.

Yeah, I don't remember, but just something of his tone, of his voice, and about mindfulness and stuff.

So it's like

it passed some of the rage

tied to it.

But it does show me that there is something wrong with the dynamics.

And I think that we mixed fame with our employees.

When you have employees and you mix it with...

Dude.

You're getting recognized.

I think this is projection because I think that there's a whole different problem happening here and it has nothing to do with, like, fame didn't even come into my head.

What is the other problem that you think it is?

I've known Bobby since 2009.

I work for him.

So I talked to him.

So, in the way that you make fun of me, saying you let McCone in too close, you let him get in too close, you give him too much, blah, blah, blah.

Then you do that with Carlos.

Well, yeah, I mean, of course, I have known him that long.

Yeah.

Right.

But it's not like we were like the best of friends.

So you're saying you're not friends with him at all?

No, I was.

It's like, let's suppose Esther Pavinsky, right?

Yeah.

One day was just like, I want to be your assistant.

Then the role changes.

Right.

The roles change, and you have to do that job.

But are you communicating that?

Don't you think that's just an instinct?

I don't know if he's got good instincts.

Like, can I give you an example of this?

Yeah.

Okay.

I was on that TV with Jordan Peale,

and we hung out all the time.

We were very close.

Right.

Okay.

He became this gigantic director.

Yeah.

The roles have changed a little bit in our friendship.

Yeah.

You know,

and I instinctually know that.

The things that I would say to him, I think that before,

I don't think I would.

Why not?

I don't know.

I think just the roles have changed.

He's in a different place.

And

yeah.

He should be the same guy you knew before.

I think I'm saying it wrong.

I think that if he hired me in a movie.

If he hired you.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

If he hired me in a movie, the roles would change, I think, is what I meant to say.

Okay.

Yeah.

It's not like I'd be be like, fuck you, I'm not doing that.

But how do we reconcile?

Well, I'm fine.

You know what I mean?

They have to change.

Are you willing to change?

I mean, yes, I'm willing to change that aspect of my behavior.

I shouldn't have yelled at you, Bob, as just as a guy I know that was fucked up.

But did you, can we just admit, though, it was a scream?

Oh, yeah, I screamed at you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

I wish you were there.

I wanted to.

It would have startled you.

I was pretty upset I didn't see it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It would have startled you.

It was awesome.

I didn't say that.

He was about to say it was awesome.

It was awesome?

That is future projection on what I could have said.

Here's another thing that I have a little bone to pick with you, too.

Is that I'm beginning to think this Arsenal thing was a prank.

Oh, my God.

So I'm going to...

I'll tell you.

What do you mean by that?

So,

what are you doing?

Pulling on my email so you see it's not a prank.

Okay.

A fan made that for you?

No, that's what I'm saying.

Oh, you think it's bullshit?

So a week before we're going to London,

Carlos calls me and goes,

Guess we're going to the Emirates,

which is, you know, my favorite sporting team.

It's in North London, and I've never been to the Emirates.

It's the stadium that they play at.

Right.

And he goes, yeah, you're going to get a tour of the grounds and this and that.

And I was...

Literally,

did I not cry?

Yeah, I was.

I cried because I was so happy.

Did I go to the Emirates when I was in London?

No, no,

no.

But I don't know what it looks like.

I don't know.

But

don't say it.

No, I was going to say: do you think a different tour manager would have got you to the Emirates?

Whoa!

Yeah.

Oh, boy.

I think so.

Oh, boy.

What?

I'm going to take a second to

say something.

Go ahead.

Speak your mind.

That was a funny bit.

The Emirates thing?

What I just said.

It was just for a bit.

It's for a bit.

But I think you did a good job.

And we do love you.

Thanks, Andrew.

And we appreciate you.

And McCone did a good job.

And we appreciate you.

And Richie

did a better job.

You did the best job.

And he wasn't even there.

Ah, thanks, guys.

Yeah.

We got to put him in the animated show.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We don't even have a choice, David.

Gripes out.

It doesn't feel better.

You don't feel better with that the gripes are gone?

The apologies have to be a little bit more real, I think.

You don't believe them?

No.

Let's hear it now.

McCone first, and then Carlos.

And let's just hear these.

And I want to see.

And as

one of my best friends in the world,

will you be real to see if it's a real apology?

Yeah, let's see.

All right, let me try to

get my mindful hat on.

Beep.

And let me open my heart.

Wait, it's loose on my side.

There it is.

Right?

Oop.

It's open.

Wide open.

Wide open.

I'm in the moment.

Okay.

And I will turn my body like animatronic style.

Hi, Bobby.

I just want to say legitimately, I'm so sorry that I was filming too much when you didn't want to.

I just know that whenever we're on these trips, some of the best times in my life, and I really want to capture every moment of it, not just for my memory, but for the fans.

Can you stop for a second?

He's already justifying it in some way, right?

I just wanted an apology.

It's already tied into why he's sorry, Bobby.

His behavior pots.

That's what it was.

Start over, please.

Open and go.

Bobby, I was wrong to have been filming for you as much as I was.

And when you said stop, and now we have a safe word to not do that.

So it'll never happen again, I guarantee it.

Okay.

That felt real.

A little bit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's still a little bit of it.

It could have been more sweet.

No tears, nothing.

No weather.

Your first one was going to be sweeter, but you guys wanted a more straightforward one.

Yeah.

I was like, I'll just come back.

That's not what we want.

That's not what I want.

It's what you should want.

Yeah.

Interesting.

You know, let me say something, man.

Next!

Hey, Bob.

Carlos here.

I'm sorry I was so passionate about the show and that I let it out on you.

I should have done better.

I should have been, I should have done the Buddhist thing to do, sit with my feelings, don't release them in anger.

Are you singing an oasis song?

Very good.

Tighten.

Really good.

Very good.

And

I love you forever, man.

Yeah.

Are you high right now?

No.

Okay.

No.

Okay.

All right.

I didn't buy it.

I didn't buy you data.

Yeah, yeah.

I love you forever.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

That's like what you would say on your wedding day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, you're not getting fucking married.

Yeah.

I've been married, so I would know.

I know.

Thank you.

I know you have.

So, Jules, our Rudy Jules, our brother.

Her mom lives with me.

Mm-hmm.

No.

And Rudy lives with me.

No.

Okay.

So every other night we have a movie night.

Oh.

Okay.

And so they've been pretty open to the movies I've suggested.

Good.

Okay.

I'm trying to push Alien and Aliens.

I love Alien.

Do you like Aliens?

Sure.

Yeah, I thought it was very good.

They're two different movies.

The second one is more action-packed and more Hollywood, but the first one is a masterpiece.

Alien.

But do you think they'll like it?

Because I showed them Taxi Driver, and they're just like...

Well, this is very different movies.

I think they'll like Alien.

Yeah, yeah.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Alien's such a good movie.

Horror?

What?

Do they like horror?

I made them watch, we saw, not talk to me, but the other Bring Her Back.

We like that.

Yeah, so we we watch horror she'll like it she'll like it but throw me some because i showed them i'm gonna show you the movies i showed them and they loved they never

think about this some of these movies they never they never even heard of all right so we saw um

shawshank redemption never heard of that movie never saw it heard of it imagine turned on the tv once i know well they don't have tvs yeah they loved it Really?

Yeah.

Oh, wow.

Why?

No, I like it.

It's easy to follow.

No, I like it.

I like it.

My point is, I didn't know if that would interest them.

It's a perfect movie.

Pretty good.

It's a pretty good movie.

Steph King.

Okay.

That's right.

Very good.

Thanks.

The second one is

Then we went to Scorsese.

They loved Goodfellas.

Oh, yeah.

I would hope so.

So they like gangster movies.

Yeah, they loved Casino.

So good.

So good.

So good.

Taxi Driver.

Wow.

Yeah.

Shocked.

I should have done Taxi Driver first.

Before.

Casino and Goodfellas.

Maybe.

Yeah.

Then we went to Shamalan, Shamalama Ding Dong, Shamalam, yeah, Sixth Sense.

They've never seen it, no, never heard about it.

They maybe heard of it, but never seen it.

Oh my, and they didn't like it.

Jules found out halfway through the movie.

Can I just say what she goes,

she looked at Bruce Willis, she goes, he dead.

What?

Yeah.

I couldn't believe it.

She must have heard through this movie.

I don't know.

She said she didn't.

There's no way.

He did.

Nobody knew.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nobody from when we watched the first time knew.

No one knew.

I know.

I didn't know.

In fact, I didn't even know the 50th time I've seen it.

I'm hearing this now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's a switch every time for me.

I'll tell you what they wouldn't like.

What?

Paul Thomas Anderson.

So I was trying Boogey Nights and Magnolia.

It's hard.

I'm telling you.

No, it's not for them.

What about this one?

Wes Anderson they wouldn't fucking like either Aronofsky.

No.

Recording for a Dream.

There's no way they would like that movie.

Well, then they saw Fargo.

They liked it?

More receivable.

And the best one they saw last night we saw was

Burn After Reading.

Oh, yeah.

Did you like that movie?

Yeah, I loved it.

It's so good.

Loved it.

It's a Colin Brothers.

You know what movie you should make them watch?

So this is what I'm asking you.

What movies should we watch?

Thank you for smoking.

Yeah.

I've never seen that.

It's great.

Oh, it's such.

That's a great.

Harvey Dent from Dark Knight.

That's a great movie.

You never saw that?

No.

Oh, man.

Tobacco executive.

Okay.

It's a great.

Look at the cast.

Robert Duvall, Macy, Rob Lowe, Katie Holmes, Sam Elliott, Adam Brody.

Wow.

It's stacked.

That movie's great.

Okay.

I'll see that.

By the way, he's underrated.

Okay.

But how about some more Evergreen movies?

Like, I mean, imagine they've never even seen Aliens, so it's like we can go back.

How about like

Richie Gannett?

Well, have they seen, have they seen Social Network?

Finch or no.

I think maybe Jules has, but no, not that.

That movie's untouchably good.

It's so good.

One of the best movies I think I've ever seen.

Yeah.

They sell Seven and Fight Club.

Two great ones.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Seven is so good.

What sin are you?

Well, you're

gluttony.

Gluttony and Slaw.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, how many do you have?

I'm not really...

No, I'm.

Pride?

Too prideful.

Yeah, pride.

Or wrath.

Pride and Pride and Prejudice.

Wrath.

Wrath.

Pride and Prejudice is a movie.

You should show them that.

Yeah.

Seriously.

Yeah.

Why not?

Okay, what am I?

Zoom in on

so pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath, and sloth.

I'm probably envy.

No, no, no.

What?

What'd you say?

What'd you say?

You're subtle for seven, baby.

Who me?

Yeah.

I'm not seven for seven.

No, you have.

Wait a minute.

Let's go through them.

Do you have an ex pride?

Do you have an an excessive belief?

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

Timeout.

No, he's going to make me so fucking mad right now.

Hold on.

I don't have seven out of seven.

Let's find out.

I know, but I don't.

Pride.

Do you have an excessive belief in one's own importance or ability?

No.

I have imposter syndrome.

You know that.

Okay.

Everyone has that.

And I feel like I'm a piece of shit, and I feel like I'm a loser.

Come on.

No, but an AA.

But McCone, be real.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, so I don't have pride.

No, you can feel like both at the same time.

I have too much self-loathing.

I have too much self-loathing to have pride.

Thank you, McCone.

No, it's because McCone doesn't know AA talk.

You can be both prideful and feel like a piece piece of shit when you walk in the rooms can you bet defend me do i pride i don't go to aa i know but so aside from the aa aspect of it carlos doesn't go to aa either

that's true that's true yeah that's yeah so go ahead that's a wash so no pride okay good thank you greed greed excessive desire for material wealth or position i literally don't

i'm so selfless with my money you know that jesse johnson how much money did i spend on her in london 1700 exactly selfless because you know that more is coming in that's not why i I don't have greed.

You know what?

There's so many opportunities that I've said no to just because it's like, you're right.

Okay, good.

So that's too.

That's all right.

So lust.

Intense or unchecked desires, especially sexual nature.

I don't know, dude, because let me just defend this, okay?

Say you're 007.

No, I'm not going to say 07, but I just want to defend myself, okay?

All right.

So my therapist goes, the reason

we've chalked it down to this.

The reason why my relationships don't work is because I, you know what I mean?

I'd rather watch porn than have sex with and be intimate with my girlfriend, right?

So I've cut that completely out of my life.

It's been like four months now.

But that says unchecked desires, especially of a sexual nature.

That's what you're describing.

Well, you're describing that like this thing can't fulfill you, so you're doing the opposite to fulfill the sexual nature.

No, what I'm saying is, is that

I can easily cut unchecked desires and move into a healthy nature.

So I don't have lust.

Okay, good.

Out.

Okay, thank you.

I'm saying, oh, I'm going to.

That's it.

The captain said, okay.

Out.

Okay.

Yes.

Envy.

Yes.

Yes, I have it.

Okay.

Yeah, that's one.

Yes, I have it.

All right, gluttony.

You literally have to get into gluttony.

Yes.

Yes.

Gluttony means wrath.

No.

Uncontrolled anger or hatred.

No.

No, it's controlled.

Your hatred is very controlled.

Yeah, yeah, no.

Sloth, laziness, or unwillingness to act.

Yes.

So I have three.

So three.

Three out of seven.

Can we at least agree on that?

Let's listen to you, Carlos.

Pride.

None.

Zero.

Greed.

None.

Kind of.

No.

I don't know, man.

Lust.

Yes.

Obviously.

Yes, lust.

Lust is pretty human nature.

Envy.

Yeah, but I don't act out.

Two.

Gluttony.

No.

Yes, dude.

Underindulgence in food.

Overindulgence, it says.

Yeah, but that's what I'm saying.

He doesn't overindulge in food, drink, or material pleasures.

Material pleasures, like sexual, like glory holes?

Is it a material pleasure?

Once in a while is not that bad.

I did get addicted to Gucci for two years.

Okay.

Okay, so it's gluttony.

Yes.

Wrath.

Yes.

Saturday Dublin was wrath.

Right?

Okay, anyway, sloth.

No, I don't think.

No.

Yeah, okay.

Partial sloth.

What do you mean?

I like the way you just said that.

You questioned it.

You know what?

That's real.

Partial sloth.

I like how that happened in your mind.

Because

you're not, sir, thank you.

It says laziness or unwillingness to act.

So you're not lazy.

but you are occasionally very unwilling to do.

Yes.

I think that's when, yeah, like action gets disconnected from the brain.

Ah, when you're high.

Like when you're high?

When I forgot I was high.

Right.

Because I was high.

I'll tell you who's a zero out of seven.

In this building?

Yeah.

It's not you.

Richie.

Oh, yeah, Richie's for sure.

I mean, this guy.

You have no.

You have nothing.

No, I don't think so.

Honestly, I might be good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What do you mean?

I'm not too pridey.

I'm not too greedy.

I'm not too lusty.

Lusty or wrathy or slippy.

Yeah.

See, this is the problem, though.

Seven out of seven, dangerous.

Zero out of seven, more dangerous.

More dangerous.

More dangerous.

Scarier.

Yeah, scarier.

Because you have to have problems.

We all have to have problems and issues.

It's basically like that.

It's wow.

I have no problems.

No options.

And

I'm going to shoot up the screw.

That would be wrath.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

That would be wrath.

That would be wrath.

By the way, right before somebody shoots up, they're like, this is wrath.

All right.

But don't you think one of these

sins are going to come to the surface?

I don't think you can be zero for seven.

Yeah, you got to have something.

You could have something.

I think I just got other things, you know?

Like, what?

What's your biggest thing?

Let's come up with another sin, maybe.

Ah, maybe there's an eighth one.

Go ahead.

Yeah.

Which is what?

You know?

Yeah.

Handsomeness could definitely be one.

Delusion.

Delusion on there.

I think delusion is pretty good.

Yeah, yeah.

By the way, this is all Bible shit.

Sins are considered to be the root of immoral behaviors.

It could damage a relationship with God.

So the core of this is saying if you have any of these, it's just based on the relationship you have with God, which I think is bullshit because everyone's relationship with God is unique and individual.

Amen.

So it's already flawed.

Yes.

By the way, I saw a girl today,

and look.

I don't know how to say, thank you.

I don't know how to say this, but you'll understand what I'm saying.

There's a very pretty woman woman that was walking across the street going to church this morning when i was going to get coffee and she was walking to the church and she was very pretty and i was watching her like fix herself on her phone she was looking at herself on the phone like fixing her hair and making sure she looks good and then i noticed

her skirt

i became like my dad i it was like that's pretty short for church it was like great it was like It was short enough where stairs,

you understand?

It would be like, yeah, if you're walking upstairs and someone's behind you, they can see the uh, they can see the goods.

So it was interesting to go to church in a short skirt.

It was, I was like, that's a move.

It's because, like, you go to a place like Mosaic.

Some of these modern.

It's like a hip church.

It's a hip church, right?

Hot, hot people.

Remember, I told you I went to that one in Venice.

Yeah.

And they're playing like, you know, modern folk music.

Yeah, yeah, they were jamming.

Yeah, yeah.

Hey, oh, yeah, yeah, hey.

And the Lord, oh, yeah, yeah, the Lord, hey, hey, hey, I like that.

Do the other song.

Yeah, what?

Do the other one they do.

The Lord is coming to town.

The Lord is coming to town.

Jesus loves you, Almighty.

You know, all that, yeah.

Love.

And people are up, and they're right, but everyone is like

dressed to the hilt.

And they're hot.

Yeah.

Is that the right word?

Yes.

yeah yeah yeah and they're hot look at them it's a their version of club it's a nightclub it's a nightclub without it's a day morning club without booze and drugs right and they're looking for their soulmate potential suitors yeah so she comes in maybe today is the day right yeah she just looked very much like she was going out yeah she was going in but then you're at church and you meet see that girl gosh she's hot but then it's like i gotta date her for three years

right yeah two years right we're only gonna make out right yeah she won't eat my butthole

probably never probably never you don't know man yeah church girls i don't know i've never did one i've met a couple of girls in church yeah but you know me i i think you'd have to she'd have to be

like you like the hottest person you've ever seen in your life to be at church and to go that's the one and i'm going to commit five years or three years until i get some action right you'd have to be like you're like i'm willing to sacrifice this time

I saw a video on TikTok about this couple.

They were saving themselves from marriage.

He wanted to do it.

She did not.

But she was like, yeah, we're saving ourselves from marriage.

And they're like, well, so, you know, you can still be intimate.

And he was like, no, I'd prefer if we don't kiss either.

You can't kiss before you fucking.

How do you know?

Dude.

I don't want to be controversial, but did I say that right?

Yeah.

I don't be controversial, but

even,

if you're a virgin out there

and you haven't had it and you're waiting for a life partner, sometimes

either the male or the female, they don't know how to do it.

Right.

And they'll never know how to do it.

And also, how do you know what's good or bad unless you've played the game?

Right.

You got to die a couple of times.

You got to die a couple of times in there.

Some mistakes.

Right.

You know what I mean?

The Bible does not explicitly state that kissing before marriage is a sin.

So, huh?

You can do that.

Jokes on you.

You.

Oh, yeah.

I want to know about Comic-Con.

What Comic-Con?

You went to Comic-Con.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What is there to know about Comic-Con?

What did you do?

I went there.

I called

for your comic book?

Yeah, for my comic book.

I went there.

Here's the thing about Comic-Con.

I did a panel, and

there's no way of knowing that the tickets are going to people be in.

So I panicked the whole time.

Sounds familiar.

Because you show up and you're like,

You did a a graphic novel.

Can you explain to the fans?

Yeah.

You did a graphic novel with somebody.

Well, I came up with a graphic novel with my friend Matthew.

That's it.

It's called Deadweight.

And we came up with the idea of this and that.

And then he went off with his illustrators and writers and they wrote it.

Wow.

So the premise was something that I

came up with.

But they wrote the story.

What is it?

Can I tell you the story?

Bobby Lee was just a grease-stained loser scrubbing dishes in a decaying hell tower until a haunted sword showed up, and everyone in his building turned into flesh-hungry death cultists armed with blenders, bug zappers, and bloodlust.

Now, Bobby slashing his way floor by floor through possessed neighbors, chainsaw perverts, satanic raver armies, and a hallucinogenic horde of suburban nightmares.

Every kill drags him deeper into a war he doesn't understand, but the sword in his hand has other plans, and it's not letting go.

Destiny called Bobby sent it to voicemail.

Now it's kicking in the door with a flaming stripper pole.

Is this not Karate Ghost?

No, is that Karate Ghost?

Wait, that sounds awesome.

Yeah.

Made for animation, a bloody fun escape.

Hilariously dark.

Yeah, yeah, it's.

You ever see The Raid?

Oh, yeah.

No, I don't think so.

Oh, my God.

It's one of the best

martial arts movies ever made.

It's so good.

You're going to watch this movie, The Raid.

It's incredible.

And the second.

Yeah, the second one's good, too.

Redemption.

And Kung Fury.

You ever see Kung Fury?

I saw Kung Fury.

So it's a combination of both things.

You know, we wanted to put it in one destination.

So if we ever did a movie, that we could actually make it.

So you did signings and stuff and pictures and everything?

Yeah.

And you called me from San Diego.

What did you say about Comic-Con?

I said, what a beautiful place.

Is that what you said?

I don't want to talk about Comic-Con in that way.

Well, we got a lot of love about our little pop-up in Happy Gilmore 2.

And it was short but sweet.

It was shortened but sweet.

I believe my line was,

it's interesting, yeah.

Is that shot in it?

That shot's in it.

So that, that people are liking that.

Okay.

Richie laughed.

Pinnacle of the movie.

Yeah.

Is that funny, Richie?

Oh, I love that.

It's not meant to be funny.

And our podcast is in the back.

It's in the back.

It's the whole fucking thing.

Yeah, that's our podcast studio.

I mean, they literally, they put, they, they let us

wearing our merch.

Yeah.

It was fun.

I think the internet liked it.

Yeah.

That we popped up.

We popped up.

Sometimes we pop up.

Sometimes we pop up.

Yep.

And let me tell you something right now, Adam Sandler.

We love you.

You pop us up whenever you want to pop us up.

Yeah, pop us up anytime.

Wow.

Cameos were bananas.

A lot of herd.

It's the whole movie.

The whole movie's cameos.

Also, that.

Bad Bunny stole the show.

Bad Bunny was so funny in it.

Yeah.

And Marcelo, who plays Bad Bunny's cousin, I think,

did a fucking phenomenal job too.

Marcelo, funny guy.

Hernandez?

Yeah.

Yeah, he's the best.

Yeah, yeah, that's

him right there.

Yeah, I love that kid.

But Bad Bunny, to be honest, really stole the show, man.

He was so good in the movie.

I didn't know he was an actor.

Is he an actor?

He is now.

Yeah,

he's going to get so much more than us.

Yep.

Amen.

Yeah, he barely speaks to him.

He loves his name at so many times.

Amen.

Amen.

So many times as well.

Eric Andre is in the scene.

Yeah, I've had a lot of people go, Great job.

I said, what?

I think my only line

is,

I don't even think I have a line.

Yeah, you say something to Benny Safty, but you say something.

Yeah.

I think it's pretty fascinating.

For the sake of the fans that want to know, we obviously did shoot that here in the studio.

They brought in their cameras into our room.

Did we pod that day?

We did.

We did a pod, and then we shot the scene, which I think inside stuff for people that want to know, it is kind of fun.

They brought an entire crew here in our little tiny bullshit studio.

Yeah.

There was like 50 people in here, maybe more.

It was so fun.

It was kind of wild.

It's wild.

Yeah.

Shout out to our buddy Kyle Nuicek for, you know.

And, you know, it's a blessing that they asked and you know we love adam and it's it's a cool thing to be involved in it was funny yeah i liked it amen and um amen and god bless god bless and um you're gonna get into golf now you could let's talk about that for a second well we went golfing in london yeah we went golfing in london and we did a putt-putt we did a putt putt right and um yeah you got mad i got a little mad because um it's an area that you're an expertise in

you were doing not in putt-putt yeah you did what you were doing back back backwards putts

yeah it it was backwards putts.

Without even looking?

Yeah, no, looked backwards putts.

Yeah, yeah.

And you would get in every time?

It went in.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not every time.

Yeah.

Didn't we tie, him and I?

We tied.

We cheated.

But you got some holes in one.

You got two hole in ones.

You know how many I got?

How many?

Zero.

Yeah, you have a problem with windmills.

Yeah, windmills are my vice.

Windmills.

I mean.

Windmills,

eating outside in the wind.

Yeah.

I have a problem with windmills, both in putt-putt and in real life.

Yeah.

I don't like windmills.

I know.

They make me.

It's hard to catch.

Hard.

Yeah, yeah.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Eat it.

Yeah.

It was windmill and it was a Ferris meal.

Yeah, there was a Ferris meal.

Ferris meal stuff.

I don't like the Ferris meal either.

I think they were more Ferris meals than wind.

Way, much more February.

You're right, much more Ferris meals than Windmill.

What was the place called?

It was really nice.

It's called

Swinger's West End.

West End in London, and it was really

good.

We have a little room there to ourselves.

Yeah.

It was great.

Yeah.

And then,

you know, can I be honest with you?

And you're, you're probably going to go, what are you talking about?

But I kind of, I kind of understand maybe the general reason why people, if they're good at it, would like golf.

Well, yeah, it is fun to get it in the hole.

Yeah.

To getting it in the hole.

It's kind of the theme of life.

Yeah.

Getting a ball in a hole is like our whole existence.

Yeah.

So, I mean, I don't know.

I've never like done a long range

because I don't even know how to swing in that way.

You know, I want to take you golfing so bad.

Let's do it then.

Like, is there a seven-hole?

You can just play seven and quit.

Okay.

There is not a seven-hole.

We could play nine is the number.

You play nine or eight.

I also don't want the pressure from behind.

Pause.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do I do we get pressure from behind?

Stop saying it.

What do you mean?

I don't like it.

I know.

Yeah, yeah.

Especially if there's like four Koreans.

Yeah.

You know, I've seen them.

This, they go like this.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

No, no, we'll go to a place that's locked off where we don't.

No, you can just, we'll try it.

Are there because I don't know.

I've never dumped in a golf match.

Have you confronted anybody by going too slow in front of you?

Yeah.

What do you say?

Like, let's say I'm in front of you.

Well, usually what happens if they're playing too slow, you'll hit a ball into them.

Oh.

You're not trying to hit them, but you want to just scare them a little bit and go, come on, come on, move it along.

And do they turn around and go, hey, buddy?

They put their hands up.

They do this thing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We're taking our time here, buddy.

What do you say?

Oh, long distance communication.

Yeah, well, because you can't, it's so fun.

Yeah, yeah.

No, I would do like

oh, no TP tents but celebrate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Something like that.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Glitter face.

Yeah,

double balloon.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What is that one?

I don't know.

He looks like you're shaking up something in the top.

Exactly.

Yeah, from here.

Two cachavas.

Two cachavas.

Yeah, yeah.

Anyway.

Now we will go.

I will take you golfing.

Please.

I would like to.

What's up?

What?

I was like, did Bobby ever watch Moholland Drive?

I did.

Oh, yeah.

Did you like it?

No, you didn't fucking like it.

That's insane.

You didn't like Moholland Drive.

That's crazy.

I liked it.

No, you didn't.

I did.

Can I give you the positives?

I love when you see a movie about LA and it feels like LA.

It felt like Lolly Dr.

Drive.

It's very Los Angeles.

So, no more, it very felt L.A.

And also her story.

We've met people like this.

Yes.

Yeah.

So all those things rang true for me.

It's just the ending.

I just didn't understand.

You got to re-watch.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And can you explain to me the ending?

I mean, the movie's been out for a while, so do explain it to me.

What do you mean the movie's been out for a while?

I mean, people already know.

You can explain the ending to me.

Just spoiler alert, tell me what the ending of Mahalan Drive is about.

So the beginning wasn't real.

She won, she won like a trip, or like she won like the two old people that come in at the end.

They were small.

She wins like the doo-wop contest in the beginning.

That was the opening scene.

And then the next shot is her laying down, covering her face with the pillow.

That's her going into the dream state because she was in love with the brown-haired girl.

So she invents this fantasy where she's like helpless and needs her.

And they're going to like discover this whole thing together.

But she actually hires a hitman to kill her.

So then she's hoping that the hitman is incompetent.

And like the guy that she's sleeping with, the director, like he's getting cucked by Billy Ray Cyrus.

So the whole first two acts are all like her fantasy.

And then after they open the blue box, that's back to her dark, sad reality.

And like, there's all these interpretations in the box representing.

Oh, I see.

So I saw those aspects of it.

That's her real reality.

Yeah, so you should re-watch it.

I'm going to re-watch it.

Okay, now I get it.

It's good.

It's real good.

You got it, though.

I didn't get it.

Oh.

Well, also, I was like, I hadn't slept in two days.

I was kind of half watching it, going, well, it seems...

Why is she here?

These shady people.

It's very,

it's very

fantastical in its approach.

It's almost like uh

we're gonna rewatch it.

That's fine.

Don't want to.

You didn't like it.

I know you didn't like it.

I loved it.

I can tell.

I can fucking tell.

Anyway, thank you for being your back.

I'm perfectly