In the Presence of a Movie Star

1h 6m
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0:00 In the Presence of a Movie Star
5:30 David Spade, Theo Von & Tim Dillon
10:00 Cake Pop Dong
15:00 Apple Pay Or Apple Pie?
19:20 Beefing with Adam Ray
25:00 Santino at the Celtics
33:00 TikTok ASMR
38:00 Bonnie Blue vs 1,000 Men
43:00 Bobby Fights a Security Guard
50:00 Fake Pregnancies & Fast Passes

More Bobby Lee
TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive
Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive
Tickets: https://bobbylee.live

More Andrew Santino
Whiskey Ginger:
https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino
Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino
Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com

More Juicy
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en

More Fancy
SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1

More Bad Friends
iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod
Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/

Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday
Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom
Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles
Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart

Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/
Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende

This episode contains paid promotion.
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Press play and read along

Runtime: 1h 6m

Transcript

Speaker 1 You two are bad friends.

Speaker 2 Who are these two idiots?

Speaker 2 A white dude and an Asian dude.

Speaker 1 You two are disgusting.

Speaker 2 We're bad friends.

Speaker 2 Mama, mama, mama, movie star. I'm in the presence of a movie star.

Speaker 2 And I'm so stunned by you because you're a movie star. I'm the president of a president.
President.

Speaker 2 I'm in the presence of a president. Yes, you are.

Speaker 2 Little Chinese boy singer.

Speaker 2 You throw out things that don't make no sense, so I throw out things that don't make some sense to you. I'm in the presence of a movie.
A movie star president.

Speaker 2 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Bad Friends. I'm in the presence of

Speaker 2 a superstar. Movie star.
I'm a star.

Speaker 2 I'm a little movie star. This guy's a superstar, Brad.
George Crooney, Brad Pitt, Andrew Santino. They're in the same level.
George Crooney. Crooney.

Speaker 2 Come to me.

Speaker 2 How funny would it be if George Clooney,

Speaker 2 what is who's calling you? Johnny Yang. Johnny O Yang.
No, Johnny Yang. Jimmy O Yang's brother.

Speaker 2 He's my haircut. Can I answer it? Yeah, sure.
Okay. Getting your haircut soon?

Speaker 2 Getting your lettuce sliced? Oh, you hung up on what are you?

Speaker 2 Go ahead. Call Johnny Yang back.

Speaker 2 Sounds like a character from Mortal Kombat. Johnny Yang wins.

Speaker 2 Finish him, Johnny Yang.

Speaker 2 Hello. Hello.

Speaker 2 Hey, how's it going?

Speaker 2 Come on, man. Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 I'm not driving right now. I'm going to check for you in 15 minutes.
I'm going to check for you. You're going to check for me?

Speaker 2 I'm going to call you.

Speaker 2 You call me, I'll call you, okay?

Speaker 2 Okay. Okay.
I'll text you. Okay, bye.

Speaker 2 How do you have any professional relationships?

Speaker 2 It's uncomfortable. What do you mean? Like, that's your haircut guy? Yeah.
That poor guy. He thinks I have an accent.
Well, he does. He thinks I do.
That's how I always talk to him. Where is he from?

Speaker 2 China. Oh, he's off the boat.
Yeah, he's off the boat. Yeah.
Was he on the show? He thinks I'm from off the boat, too.

Speaker 2 Does he? Yeah, he goes, hi, Raw. I go, hi, Rao.

Speaker 2 Okay, is this a house haircut? You get your haircut at your house? This guy's over, yeah. Oh.
Yeah, he comes over. I'm in the presence of a movie star.
I'm in the presence of a superstar.

Speaker 2 Why do you keep saying this? Because I did two lines in Theo Vaughn's movie. I'm in the presence of a movie star.

Speaker 2 Yeah? Dude, dude, who would you work for?

Speaker 2 Morgan Freeman this week.

Speaker 2 Morgan Freeman, right?

Speaker 2 He does. I do want Theo Vaughn.
I'm a movie star. What Morgan Freeman are you talking about? The fucking eyes, the blind, the magic movie you did in fucking Hungary.

Speaker 2 What? A year ago? It was a year ago. Right.
Look Look at this. There's Bobby walking around on set, smoking, being a diva.

Speaker 2 I heard.

Speaker 2 I got back some word that you were being a diva on set. Why? I am a diva.
I'm a little skinny diva. Look at him.

Speaker 2 I'm fucking confused. Are you rocking magenta? Was that your pick or theirs? Theirs pick.
That looks really good. Thanks, man.

Speaker 2 Do you think I should do the cowboy look? Because everyone's saying I should do the cowboy look. I think you should do the shirts and the hat, but not the boots.
Oh, the boots are little too much.

Speaker 2 Because you pride yourself in your shoe game. Yeah.
You got good shoe game. I think boots are not your style.
Yeah. But I think the hats are dope.
I think the shirt, I think the belt is fly as shit.

Speaker 2 You know what I look like there? Sicario. Sicario.

Speaker 2 A hitman. You do.
Yeah. Oh, don't bring it up.
We talked about that before the show. That woman got shot yesterday and killed.
Oh, no, oh, no. What? What? Her husband put on a hit.

Speaker 2 She's going to get like fast food. Her ex-husband hires a hitman, allegedly.
Let's stop for a second. Push pause because I want to.

Speaker 2 Let me get the information right. Yeah.

Speaker 2 A man.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 They got right? You got that part. You got that.
That's all I know. That's all I know.
A man.

Speaker 2 No. So a man hired a hitman to kill his wife.
Apparently, a group, right? Carlos didn't say there was like a crew of people that were out to kill this woman.

Speaker 2 No, and let me ask you something before we get into this. They framed it as a robot.
How much money would you spend?

Speaker 2 What? To kill your wife. How much money would I spend? Yeah, I wonder how much.

Speaker 2 Why don't we? Because

Speaker 2 I would want top level.

Speaker 2 By the way, I saw a meme today that said all guys that wear those hats that have the words upside down are douchebags. And it made me laugh so hard.
I immediately thought of you.

Speaker 2 I was like, you have so many of those hats that are upside down. You have Dallas, you have Texas, you have...
Dallas was a Bad Friends fan. Thank you.
Okay, but you have Texas.

Speaker 2 You have another one, too. What's the other one you wear too? That's upside down.
Yeah, Los Angeles upside down. Who makes these upside down hats that all the kids have? True brand.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't get it.

Speaker 2 I'll never get it.

Speaker 2 It was a manufactural error and they just went out like that. You know that, right? That's not true.
That's how it got created. Really? Yeah, a a hat got printed upside down and they sold them.

Speaker 2 You're tricking me right now. Dude, I'm tricking you all the time.
I tricked you into doing this show. You've been here for five years now.
This is a long time. Sucker.
Thank you.

Speaker 2 Also, make it more challenging, like, mix up the letters because I can read it. That's cool.
See, that would be cool if it wasn't. It was a text.
Yeah, I mean, if it was

Speaker 2 upside down, excited mix up the fucking letters, dude.

Speaker 2 How was shooting the Theo Vaughn movie with David Spade and Theo Vaughn and a bunch of other stars? I mean, this is a star-studded cast, dude. What are you doing? What are you talking about?

Speaker 2 What are you doing right now?

Speaker 2 Tim Dylan. What are you doing right now?

Speaker 2 No, no, no, no, stop, stop. Don't even do that.
It looks what are you doing? I'm just trying to celebrate my friend. Okay, I'm going to tell you something.

Speaker 2 You want me to expose you to the fucking truth?

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Go ahead. You want to be exposed to the truth, my friend.
Yeah, go ahead. What is it? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 I'm not even in the thing.

Speaker 2 Yet. Kirk Fox, David Spade.
Let's get the full. Let's go.
David Spade, Kirk Fox, Theo Vaughn, Gavin Warren, Nate Diaz, Javier Suarez. Love him.
Thomas Spader, Michael E. Sean York.

Speaker 2 Dude, Thomas Spader is so good. He always plays the diner patron.
He's always in every movie. Every.
And he's so good. He never has a line, right?

Speaker 2 But when he's eating in the background, dude, you're like, oh, that guy's really eating. I'm surprised that's not your character.
Go up. But

Speaker 2 Javier played Senor Senor. That's got to be a Bobby Lee character.

Speaker 2 Senor Senor. Senor Senor.
Senor Senor. Yeah, I don't know.
I don't even know what my character. Oh, anyway.

Speaker 2 So you want to expose to the truth? Oh, yeah. Expose me the truth.

Speaker 2 Can't wait. Oh, see, when you're in this kind of mood, dude, see this.

Speaker 2 I'm in the presence of a movie star. See this mood?

Speaker 2 See this mood? Wow. Look at that.
Timmy Dillon, David Spade, Theo Vaughn. This movie's going to be huge, dude.

Speaker 2 Why are you laughing? Dude, because you're being sarcastic. And no, I'm not.
100%.

Speaker 2 How?

Speaker 2 They don't offer you shit because they know you're going to say no. Buddy, buddy, buddy.
They know you're going to say no. Buddy.
Because you know what you need? Buddy.

Speaker 2 That's what you want. Buddy.
Donero Profovor. That's you, guy.
Buddy. I go $2.
I'll get it. Buddy.
I'll do it for $2. Now, that's this guy.

Speaker 2 Oh, you got to go to UTA, then through my lawyer, then through this guy. And that's why they're laughing, guy, because you know you're fucking wrong, dude.
Yeah. Buddy.
Yeah. They did offer me a role.

Speaker 2 Okay. That's what I'm saying.
And

Speaker 2 now you're spitting it back at me like, why did you take the role? I'm in the presence of a movie star.

Speaker 2 Let me tell you something. No, he called me.
Theo called me to see if I could do something, but I was in Philly. He literally called me on a Friday, goes, dude, can you shoot tomorrow?

Speaker 2 I was like, tomorrow? No, I'm out of town. What the fuck? That's how I got it three days before.
No, I know, dude. I'm not going to.
Oh, shit. Relax.
Jesus Christ. By the way,

Speaker 2 let's reframe the joke you just made that you made the boys in the booth laugh at. I wait for money.
What? We don't get paid to do anything on television or film.

Speaker 2 The last time I got a check to do a thing on TV was Dave. I'm in the presence of a movie star.

Speaker 2 I'm in the presence of a movie star.

Speaker 2 You really are. No.
You're fucking. I'm I'm sorry, dude.
You're a superstar, not a movie star.

Speaker 2 Superstar. How was your week in Phoenix? I heard it was good.
Did you see your mommy? I didn't see her. You didn't see your mom in Phoenix? You were in Phoenix? I was hanging out with people, man.

Speaker 2 No, I didn't see her. When I go to Phoenix to do shows, she doesn't know I'm in town.
Why would you do that? You're because I have to get in the car and drive all the way to the desert and come back.

Speaker 2 I don't want to do it. Phoenix is the desert.
I know. I'm saying there's more desert, though.
It's just in more desert. I know.
I know where your mom lives. It's 30 minutes away from where you work.

Speaker 2 I know, but deserts with less buildings. What does that have to do with it? Why do I mean a desert and even more building? It's your mom.
I understand, dude. She doesn't know I'm in town.

Speaker 2 If she knew I was in town, I would go visit her. Can I give you an old Chinese proverb? Give me two.
He who visits sand and does not visit mother

Speaker 2 will soon know she will turn into sand. Wow.

Speaker 2 Oh, thank you so much, guys. She's going to die, though.
Probably. My mom's going to.
Yeah, everyone's going to die, dude. But she's going to die soon or something.
Soon.

Speaker 2 Okay, so fine. Soon.
Okay, you're right. Soon die.
Okay. And soon die is the other Chinese proverb.

Speaker 2 Really? Soon die is? Soon die live now.

Speaker 2 Soon die live now. Soon die live now.

Speaker 2 Don't do. Don't do.
Cry later. Cry later.

Speaker 2 Big check. That's right.
That's a really good one. That's a really good one.
So you get a check. You watch it.
You do shows and you don't see your mom, but that's okay. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I have a proverb.

Speaker 2 What is it?

Speaker 2 Two white couple in suburb, in Chicago, right? Sometimes they die in fire. Oh,

Speaker 2 it's funny.

Speaker 2 It's too cold to get set on fire. I know.
It's the middle of winter. That's an old proverb.
Your mom has a higher likelihood of dying in this.

Speaker 2 I don't know what we're doing. In Phoenix.
Listen. No, no, I just mean.
I think we're doing this. Let's not do this right now.
All right. All right.

Speaker 2 Right. It feels like we're doing this.
Right. And I don't want anything bad to happen to your two, three.

Speaker 2 I'm here in the presence of a movie star. Okay.
Let's get back into love. And because you and I have some friction stuff.
How about let's do some love? Okay. How about some love stuff? Yeah.

Speaker 2 I miss you. I'm happy.
I'm happy too. And I'm sorry I abandoned you.
For what?

Speaker 2 I left you on the last episode. You had to do it.
Oh, yeah, yeah. But still fine.

Speaker 2 But to say to the fans, I do mean this, a lot of times the fans are like, oh, why the fuck are they doing it again? It's like, dude, we're all working on stuff. It's hard.

Speaker 2 We're trying to go on tour, work on our hours. It's hard to always be in the studio every week.
We've done this show for five years. We've literally never missed a week.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 And we're going to continue to do that. Continue to do it, yeah.
Because it's been. Sometimes we have to pivot.
We got to pivot.

Speaker 2 We got to Jeremy pivot pivot once in a while. Yeah.
You know what's so funny? I was going to say Jeremy Pivot. Were you really? Yeah.
But I'm like, no, that's a hacking joke. No.
Good. Jeremy Pivot.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I saw Ian Fidance's penis last night.
God bless. And it's what I thought it was going to look like.
Can I guess?

Speaker 2 Yeah. Tell me it was pierced.
It has a Prince Albert. There's no piercing.
Really? No. Hmm.

Speaker 2 It looks like.

Speaker 2 Okay, is it curve? It's something you get at Starbucks.

Speaker 2 Oh, oh, oh, oh, those little egg bites. Close? Oh,

Speaker 2 one of those, one of those cake pops? Yeah, cake pops. It looks like a cake pop.
The head is like a purpley-orangey color with sprinkles on it. Yeah.
And the stem looks like a stick.

Speaker 2 Well, wait a minute. Sprinkles.
Oh, he's bisexual. Yeah, they're sprinkles.

Speaker 2 They have to put bisexuality on there. Does he dip it? Does he like dip it in the corner? He dips it in, yeah, butthole.
Man and women. You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 So you have different varieties of chocolate. See, I was supposed to see him the other day.

Speaker 2 I was working out on the west side, and he was like, oh, can you meet up? I said, I'm never going to make it to the store.

Speaker 2 But I'm happy now I I didn't go because now I guess he was showing his penis to you. No, no, we went to the spa.
Oh, yeah. So we're in the spa.

Speaker 2 I went to the steam room, and he looked at my penis and he goes, and he kind of almost died laughing. Why? He goes, it's so cute.
And he started laughing. Well, he doesn't have a big penis.

Speaker 2 No, he didn't say it was small. Oh, he just liked it.
My dick is cute.

Speaker 2 Minion. Minion.
You've seen it. I have.

Speaker 2 The best, dude.

Speaker 2 If it were to make a noise, that's the noise.

Speaker 2 What does it do when it sees a woman? Oh,

Speaker 2 okay, okay, okay. Like that, like that, like that.

Speaker 2 Like that, dude. And it's like, he's so happy.
And I can get hard now

Speaker 2 just talking to people on the phone. No.
It's a miracle. Me? Do you ever do that with a woman? No, no, no.
With a woman. No, all right.
Yeah. But what if I put on a female voice? Huh?

Speaker 2 What if when you call me and I'm like, hey, Bob? No, no, no, no, no. I know it's you, dude.
I'm going to do it.

Speaker 2 You've tried before. It doesn't work.
Pisses me off. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Kanye went on a tie rate about hemaphrodites on Twitter, by the way. It was unbelievable.
What?

Speaker 2 Kanye was like, you tell me if you're a hermaphrodite, you wouldn't stick your penis in your own vagina. And I really had to think about it.
I was like, that's actually a great point.

Speaker 2 Well, you would have to bend it like Beckham. Yeah.
You know what I mean? And I don't know if my. I was literally about to say bend him like Beckham.
We're on the page. We're on the same.

Speaker 2 Look, if I'm a hermaphrodite. Oh, if a hemaphrodite only dates women, that's a hermaphrodite.
That was his first joke. Pretty good.
Yeah. Yeah, play on words.

Speaker 2 But the other one was: the other one was, you're telling me if you're a hermaphrodite, you wouldn't try to stick your penis in your own vagina. Then he said, I thought about it.
I'm no longer a Nazi.

Speaker 2 He literally wrote, I no longer am a Nazi. That's so funny, dude.
He thought about it. He thought about it.
Wow. Well, you got to think about it.
Because of Adam Sandler.

Speaker 2 Because of Adam Sandler, because Adam Sandler gave him a tribute of the 50th SNL. Is that what it was?

Speaker 1 He probably just talked to him privately.

Speaker 2 Hey, buddy, you can't talk about me that day.

Speaker 2 You got to lay off the Jews. Yeah.
Lay off the Jews.

Speaker 2 But if there was like a Hollywood president of Jews, Adam would be out. Sandler's the best.
Yeah, he's the best.

Speaker 2 He is maybe the coolest, most like funny, chill, down-to-earth dude I've ever met in comedy. And I'm not even kidding.

Speaker 2 At his level, like Chappelle is very sweet and dope, too, but like Sandler's, Sandler still has that boyish, like, he's like, oh, hey, buddy, it's sweet. It's like,

Speaker 2 I can't even describe it.

Speaker 2 Remember, I was with that sexy lady and we walked by. I told you that.
Yeah. And Sandler was there with his mom, and he looked at my girl and goes,

Speaker 2 funny guy.

Speaker 2 And that's, no, that's, you know what he's doing? Yeah. A log.
Alley oop. And that's something.

Speaker 2 Don't say it.

Speaker 2 And I don't even have to say it because you know what I'm saying. It's something that these guys never do.
No, no, him specifically.

Speaker 2 You've never given me an alley oop. Bro.

Speaker 2 He's not even in the game. I know.
That's why. He's had to learn how to play the game for a team.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Get on the team.
No, I don't. Get on the team.
And then maybe you can throw me an alley oop. Bro, his tryouts are in a a week.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Let me tell you something.
You're walking down the street. You pass Carlos.
Yeah. And Carlos goes, funny guy.
The girl's going to be like, ew, what was that?

Speaker 2 Oh, that's true. Yeah.
That guy's got to go to jail. Yeah, yeah.
You know him? Yeah. Why do you know him? Yeah, I don't know if we can.
Yeah, yeah. That's what it is.
Wait, Bob. How about this?

Speaker 2 When you see Bobby in public from now on with a woman,

Speaker 2 you do not recognize him. You ask for change.
You act homeless and you ask for change.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Like they passed each other.

Speaker 2 Carlos. When you called me last night, where were you? It sounded like you were at a party or something.
Yeah, he told me you were at a nightclub or some shit last night. It's like 10 o'clock.

Speaker 2 You know where the fuck you were, pal. No, I was with Ian Fidance at

Speaker 2 Fred62's. Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's still open? Yeah, they closed at one.

Speaker 2 Wow, I thought that closed down. It was pretty good last night.
Wasn't Fred62's. They fell off for a little while.
They did, yeah. But it's a cute little, it's so many hips as well.

Speaker 2 Is House of Pies still open across the night? No, I haven't seen that open. It is.
But Fred62 is all these like... Oh.

Speaker 2 Oh, dude. Yeah, it's very hash brown.
What do do you mean? That's like your favorite people. No, I'm fucking.
Dude, I'm Norms. Yeah, thank you.
No, I'm Norms. No, you're not, dude.
I'm Norms.

Speaker 2 You're a pretentious artist. You're a pretty artist.
You always want to go to Swingers. I don't want to go there.
Yeah, Swingers is low rent. Swingers is still cool, though.
No, it's not. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 And it hasn't been cool in a decade. Yeah, tattooed Mexicans.
You love them. I fucking love tattooed Mexicans.
I know. Exactly.
That's what you like to do. I won't leave home without them.

Speaker 2 Get by American Express. Right, but I haven't been to fucking Fred 62s in like years.
I'm a Norms-Mels kind of a guy. Mels sucks.
I know. but that's what, that's what, and look at that.

Speaker 2 Swingers used to be the shit. That's probably me in the background before I lost the weight.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Wait, no, listen, this is, this is a crazy moment. We were shooting over there one time, and I go, Al Madrigal goes, hey, let's go get House of Pies for lunch.

Speaker 2 You know, because we were like skipping the crew lunch. Yeah.
And I was like, I'm starving, dude. Let's go over there.
He's like, fuck yeah. And he goes, oh my God, my wallet's in my trailer.

Speaker 2 And I look down at my phone. I'm like, my wallet's in my fucking trailer, too.
I was like, shit. So we're asking people, exemption F cash, da, da, da, and everyone's like, oh, okay.

Speaker 2 So I call House of Pies, and she's got to be still there. It's the old Asian woman that answered the phone.
I love her. And she goes, she's like, huh, hey, how to pies.
And I was like, hey,

Speaker 2 do you do Apple Pay? And she's like, Apple Pay, yeah, we tap. Yeah, Apple Pay.
Yeah, Apple. Yeah.
And I was like,

Speaker 2 I'm not making this up. I swear to God.
I know this is such an Andrew Santino bid for the show, but I was like, yeah, Apple. So you take Apple.
Yeah. She's like, yeah, Apple Pay.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Apple view. I know what she said.
Dude, I walk in and I'm like, I'm like, we order the food. I go to tap.
I'm like, where's Apple Pay? She's like, no, Apple Pie, Apple Pie, Apple.

Speaker 2 And she pointed to Apple Pie.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Apple pie.
Yeah, yeah. They've done that.

Speaker 2 Bro, I felt so dumb. And Magical's like, you fucking idiot.
Yeah, yeah. We ordered all this food.
Yeah. And this woman said apple pie.
You think she's at Apple Pay? I'm like, it sounds the same.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. She literally goes, yeah, apple pie, apple pie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, okay, they take it.
This is like a South Park episode. It's really funny, yeah.
Welcome to Apple Pie.

Speaker 2 Take Apple Pie. Yeah.
Dude, that cracked me up. By the way, we only got the the food because Al was able to...
That guy. Al was able to figure his way out of everything.
So

Speaker 2 what did he do? He found a dude to loan him cash.

Speaker 2 In the restaurant? He like knew a guy. And I was like, how do you know this guy? He's like, I'll Venmo him or get him back or whatever.
To give him cash to pay for the thing. Wow.
Al is a magician.

Speaker 2 Dude, Al is, he can get into anything, too. Yeah, dude, he's a magician.
You know what I mean? Like, he's like a sitcom guy now. He is.
You know, he used to tell me on the set when we worked together?

Speaker 2 He used to go, dude, I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to be like a fifth, six on the call sheet kind of guy.
I'm going to cruise in. I'm going to go, that's what you guys are having.

Speaker 2 And then get out of there. And I was like, yeah.
And he goes, watch. And he did.
Now he's on.

Speaker 2 He's on George Lopez's show, right? He's been on for years and he's cruising.

Speaker 2 It's incredible. He loves it.
It's just paycheck, paycheck, paycheck. And for people that don't know, one of our good buddies, a comic, comedy store guy, has the worst blow-ups of anybody on earth.

Speaker 2 Ow? On stage, he fucking would blow up on audience. Oh, I know.
Oh, my God. I know, I know.
Someone would talk. He'd be like, lady,

Speaker 2 and then it would just spill out all the

Speaker 2 rage. It's a rage.
It's a spill out of it. Yeah.
And look at how sweet he looks.

Speaker 2 But you would never guess. Do you get raided? I've been getting raged lately.
When I was young, I did, but now I just ignore people talk. If they're yelling, I just don't, I don't, it didn't happen.

Speaker 2 Like when a group of people walk out during a setup, people did that to you? Yeah, last night. I go, where are you going?

Speaker 2 And they turn around, we've got to go to the bathroom. Yeah.
During a setup? Well, I get so mad. And then it's like, or they fall asleep.
Oh, I don't know. You get late night spots at the OR.

Speaker 2 There's always like a heroin nod lady,

Speaker 2 you know what I mean? In and out of consciousness. I hate it.
I don't like

Speaker 2 or itchy people. You see a lot of like, oh, yeah, yeah.
You see a lot of itchy people in the store late at night. Yeah.
Itchies, bro. And you know what's also driving me crazy? Adam Ray.

Speaker 2 I tell you. Dude, he's been really sticking you.
Not only, yeah, he went up there. We did David Tell's

Speaker 2 benefit show for the fires.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 I was second to last, but Adam went up a couple before me. He slaughtered, right? Yeah.
But now I'm getting, I'm in the back of the room looking at the audience, going,

Speaker 2 Why? I don't know why. What's wrong? I don't know.
So Adam is really bugging you. Yeah.
He's killing too hard. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I look at the audience and I go, don't laugh.

Speaker 2 And they're like, what? What? You know what I mean? I go, don't laugh. No, no, no.
Stop laughing. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then they go, okay. And then they stop laughing, right? And then when other groups I go,

Speaker 2 like the Mexicans, they go crazy. I go,

Speaker 2 you know what I mean? And Adam's still killing. Was he doing him or Phil? Him.
He was doing him.

Speaker 2 He's playing him. He's playing Adam.
He's doing him, right? And then afterwards, I go up there and I always do the Weasel thing. I just sit next to him.
I put my arm around him.

Speaker 2 I go, he's a good, huh? Oh, boy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like, yeah, it was fun, fun. I go, uh-huh.
And I squeeze a little bit. You're really trying to threaten us? A little too much.

Speaker 2 Is that little big dog? Are you big dogging him when you do it? A little too much, man.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. It's so much.

Speaker 2 And he's in a moment.

Speaker 2 And I love him dearly, like a brother. You know that, right? Yeah.
But it's like, but you're sick of it. Sounds like you're sick of it.
It's a little too much.

Speaker 2 Ooh, so the war has started here on Bad Friends. With who? What? With who?

Speaker 2 How can you have a war with who? With the war.

Speaker 2 No, no, no. How can you have a war, right? If you're

Speaker 2 a tiny island in a micro island, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know, those micro islands? Yeah. You know how Philippines has those little tiny islands versus America.

Speaker 2 You're America in this scenario? Yeah. I don't know.
You know what I mean? Yeah. You don't think so? This is more like Seattle versus San Diego.

Speaker 2 That's really what this is about. Dude.
This is a local war. No, no, it's not a local.

Speaker 2 Zaka. Zak Doc.

Speaker 2 Ow. Me too, me too.
For both of us. I'll tell you where to go.
Where? Zock Doc. Oh, what is an app? I've heard it.
It's an app. Yeah, it's a free app.
It's a free app.

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Speaker 2 No, no, we're talking about booking in-network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty from mental health to dental health, primary care to urgent care, and much, much more.

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Speaker 2 So stop putting off those doctors' appointments and go to zocdoc.com/slash bad friends to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. That's zocdoczocdoc.com slash bad friends.

Speaker 2 Zocdoc.com/slash bad friendship.

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Speaker 2 This is a simple one. This is a simple one.
No, no, no. This is the North versus the South.
No, let's stop. Let's stop.
What are you doing? Nothing. Yeah, yeah.
It's not.

Speaker 2 It's more like California versus Washington.

Speaker 2 I'll give you that. Okay, that's good.
I'll give you that. Southern California.
No, all of California. No, because Northern California is closer to Washington than we are to them.

Speaker 2 But we're still a part of the same state. Culturally, they can't stand us.
We're different people. Northern California can't stand Southern California.

Speaker 2 How about this? I get

Speaker 2 Bakersfield down. Yes.
That's fine.

Speaker 2 I get Bakersfield down. I'd even give you all the way up to like under

Speaker 2 just under San Jose. Okay.
Can I get San Jose down? I don't know if I can give you San.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Sack.
I give you

Speaker 2 a little further. It is? I think so, right? How about this? Sack, we carve out San Jose for San Francisco and then we go down.
Okay, that's good. Okay, good.
Thank you. Thank you.

Speaker 2 He's getting out the map. Yeah, but anyway, yeah, maybe there is a little war.
Yeah, see, I think you get Fresno for sure. That's huge.
Yeah. It was the Josh Holm thing.
I think that pisses me off.

Speaker 2 That did. It fucked you up.
Yeah, because he went to go see Adam backstage. And now when Adam's killing, I look at them as if they're all Josh Holm.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I view every audience member as Josh Home and I go, don't laugh at that. Don't laugh at that.
You're Queens of the Stone Age.

Speaker 2 Don't laugh at that. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Them crooked vultures, remember? Them crooked vultures, baby. Yeah, baby.
Anyway, I'm so happy for them. I had a nice little weekend in Boston, Massachusetts.
Had a fun time. Yeah, Wilbur.

Speaker 2 Went to a basketball game. Yeah, I did four at the Wilbur.
And you do, and I see you with basketball stars now. Basketball stars? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Who? I saw you on the court with some very large African-American people. What's his...

Speaker 2 Right there. Yeah, like that.
Who's that?

Speaker 2 Take a guess at what his name is and what position he plays.

Speaker 2 And what team he plays for, even.

Speaker 2 Okay, so he plays for the

Speaker 2 Knicks. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 Well, you're in Boston. That's right.
The Boston Knicks. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, the Celtics.
That's right. The Celtics.
Okay, right? Celtics, right? And is Jamal Bird.

Speaker 2 Dude.

Speaker 2 I'm not kidding. Jamal Bird? His initials are JB.
Is it really? JB is her initials. That's pretty close.
Yeah, thank you. Because there was Larry Bird.
There was Larry Bird. He was white, though.

Speaker 2 I understand that, but if you mix the two. There's Jamal Bird.
There's James. J.
Bird Charles. There he is.
You miss him. Yeah.
Jalen. So who is that? So you're on the court? Jalen Brown.

Speaker 2 You're on the court? Yeah. And what does that feel like? Courtside's incredible.
And a gift from the Celtics.

Speaker 2 Shout out the Celtics for treating me like that. That was such a nice, cool thing that they did.
So I'm going to tell you where we're at. Shout out Sully.
Shout out

Speaker 2 to Sully. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And Carlos knows this. If I wanted to go to the Celtics game.
You don't like basketball game? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 If you wanted to go to a football game, to an Arsenal game, they would 100% treat you like a king. Yeah, they would.
So what I'm saying is that... They've emailed us multiple times about it.

Speaker 2 So if I were... Cut yourself off real fast.
They've emailed us multiple times about it. Never got an email, and I have to see it for myself.
You don't have a fucking email. He's your email.

Speaker 2 You don't even have to. Why are you screaming at me? Because I'm trumping you, dog.
All right. So, what I'm saying is,

Speaker 2 if I wanted to go to the Celtics game, I would get last row. You know what I mean? This is such a bullshit.
It is. It's true.
I can't. I've never been on the court of basketball.

Speaker 2 Even if the fucking stadium was, even if the stadium was empty on a Monday morning, I wouldn't be able to do that.

Speaker 2 Arsenal Football Club emailing you about, we're all buzzing that guys are Arsenal fans. You know what, dude? Fuck you.
Get fucked. You're going to get treated like a king.
They love you.

Speaker 2 You don't go to basketball games.

Speaker 2 If you like basketball, they would do the same for you i'll never go to a basketball travis kelsey and taylor swift in any situation you don't like football i'm just saying and you're just you know i mean all i'm saying who's the movie star here you're in you are the presence of a movie you're in the presence i'm like you know what i'm like i'm like you know southwest industrial film you know the fans don't believe this bullshit anymore you know that right what they don't buy it this like lie you keep feeding them they don't the fans are over this this great lie everyone that goes okay okay okay everyone goes

Speaker 2 everyone goes, we know Bobby's Hollywood. Hold on, hold on, hold on.
They know. Hold on, hold on.
It's a lie. It's a bad lie.

Speaker 2 When you hit the button.

Speaker 2 When you hit the button. I said, sorry, but I had to defend myself.
I had to defend myself. He's sweating.
Wait, wait, don't. Pete, get him your sweat rag.

Speaker 2 Get him your sweat rag. Whatever that is, guys.

Speaker 2 Buy him a new Whitney Houston shirt. He's going to sweat through this one.

Speaker 2 Get out of that.

Speaker 2 You know what? You're like a black comic shooting, especially, and there's got that sweat rag on stage.

Speaker 2 Get him one of those Apollo sweat rags.

Speaker 2 Stab him off. Okay.

Speaker 2 So it's...

Speaker 2 Can I defend myself or what?

Speaker 2 All right, Jim. I'm in.
All right, you're in?

Speaker 2 You're 50% true. Ah, yes.
No, you are more. No, no, you're 50% true.
It's right.

Speaker 2 So I do. Okay.
Have I worked in things? Yes. Your whole life.
I mean, you could just, it's obvious. I am DB me.
I've done things. Okay.

Speaker 2 But what I'm saying is that

Speaker 2 there are certain like other things like events or the circle of people that one hangs out with. Like when we're in Melbourne, right, and Dakota Fanny came in and all these people, these celebrities,

Speaker 2 they came for you. No, they did not.
They came for us. They're fans of us.

Speaker 2 Had you met any of them before? My buddy Jake Lacey's. Exactly.
I've never even, there's no other situation where I'd be able to see him. Yeah, you would through me.

Speaker 2 You're in the presence of a movie. That's what I'm saying.
No, you know what I mean? No. So I don't get into your situation.
Yeah. Do I have a blessed life? Yes.
And I've worked hard and

Speaker 2 I sell out. I just don't know how

Speaker 2 to put myself.

Speaker 2 My situations are me and David Tell in an alleyway smoking a cigarette. You romanticize this.
Me and Ian Fidance at a spa. You just don't go out of your way to talk to people.
You're a fucking

Speaker 2 sleep till 4 p.m.

Speaker 2 Recluse. And that's your business.
What are you talking about? When I got back from fucking Budapest,

Speaker 2 Jamie Lee Curtis, I'm like, you want to do something? And no return.

Speaker 2 Yeah, why would she? That's what I'm saying. I try.
Jamie Lee Curtis? She just wants to hang out with you.

Speaker 2 That's insane. I know.

Speaker 2 That's what I'm saying. Pick your battles, buddy.
Yeah, I don't know. Then maybe I'm like picking the wrong battle.
You're definitely picking the wrong battle.

Speaker 2 But what I'm saying is just like Adam Ray. That's the wrong battle.
I was kidding.

Speaker 2 He's not going to think so. And I'm telling him after the show that it's war now.

Speaker 2 Oh, come on. You know I'm kidding, right? No.
The fans know. The fans don't know.
Dude,

Speaker 2 the fans, you know. Oh, man.
This podcast is a disaster.

Speaker 2 I'm like, I'm sweating. I'm drowning.
This is insane. Get him a sweat rack.
This is crazy. I need a sweat rack.
Get the fuck away from me. Get the fuck away from me.

Speaker 2 If you approach me, I'll fucking attack you. Get out of here.
Good boy.

Speaker 2 Don't eat that, man.

Speaker 2 Anyway.

Speaker 2 So, all right, let's back up. So it's 50% of that true.
Okay, so let's move forward. Let's move forward to him from a minute.
Yeah, yeah. But it was incredible sitting on the.

Speaker 2 They treated me like a little king, and it made me feel kind of special. I know.
For the first, you know,

Speaker 2 it's a privilege. It's crazy to go.
And an honor. It's wild.
Yeah, yeah. It's wild.
Thank you, Celtics organization, for letting him sit in your seats. It meant the world to me.

Speaker 2 It meant the world for Tam, right? And who is that now? You're just showing us pictures of black guys? Yeah? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 yeah it's jamal wiley but i think it came up in jamal bird because of his hair yeah

Speaker 2 okay carlos what are you doing you always know how to reset the room man wow honestly yeah yeah you really reset the room you're the ultimate host it's a cleanser you are you're a palate cleanser you're my you're what is it what did brody used to have apple cider vinegar

Speaker 2 he used to have apple cider vinegar i love apple cider i know dude it's i hate the taste but it's good for you it's also good for your toe toe fungus you put it in you put your feet in it?

Speaker 2 I mean, I have a concoction at home.

Speaker 2 Really? You want to hear my concoction? It really works. Apple cider vinegar? Sometimes.
But the two mixtures that are. Why are you laughing dude? Where are you getting so much toe fungus?

Speaker 2 Can I guess? Obviously, the Korean spa.

Speaker 2 It's just my left foot. I've always had a problem with my left foot.
Isn't that the movie? The left foot?

Speaker 2 Is that what it's about? Yeah, Bobby Lee Lewis is in my left foot, a new version. So, my left foot, so I'll tell you what you do.
Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 2 It's oregano oil and tea tree oil mixed. Swirled around.
You swirled around. One to one? 50%, 50, 50, 50.
Yeah. So one to one.
Yeah. And then you dunk your toe in there.
And then let it sit?

Speaker 2 You sit there for like an hour. An hour? And you have to fucking angle it.
So you're like watching an iPad movie, but your foot's like this and you're doing this. Wait, why do you have to angle?

Speaker 2 You just put your foot in a bowl that's big enough. Oh, fuck, you're right.
What are you doing?

Speaker 2 Oh, you're right. No water.
You don't water it down at all. I don't know.
And it disappears. I've been taking oil of oregano pills every day.
For what? I read that they were good for you.

Speaker 2 It is good for you. Is it, though? Yeah.
What do I take it for? I don't even know. And then I take Lion's Mane for my memory.
You know what else I take? Because I'm scared. 20 mushrooms.

Speaker 2 I take mushrooms. I take the mushrooms.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 What's it called? I don't know. I take the mixture of the 20 mushrooms.
Ready and all that. Yeah, all that stuff.
Go back and see that. Yeah, lion's mane is mushroom.
That's part of it. Zoom in.

Speaker 2 Oregano oil

Speaker 2 has antimicrobial properties that may help with bacterial, viral, and fungal infections, help with digestion, reduce coughs. Oregano oil can be toxic.
Okay, that's good.

Speaker 2 It may irritate sensitive skin. I've just heard it's good for you, so I started taking small.
It's so stupid. I don't fucking know.
You hear one thing, and then you're like, I guess.

Speaker 2 But then I bought a TikTok machine. I was on TikTok, an antifungal machine.
It doesn't work. Well, no shit.
Yeah, I spent hundreds of dollars on this green machine. What do you?

Speaker 2 You stick your toes in there, and the green light comes on. And an anti-fungal TikTok machine? Yeah, yeah.
Is that it? I don't know. I got it on TikTok.
Nail fungus.

Speaker 2 And you stick stick your toes in there, and a little glow happens. Oh, it's a laser.
It's like a laser-y thing. Are you lasering the fungus now? Yeah, and it's like nothing's happening.

Speaker 2 Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. Another thing that doesn't work is when you're on TikTok, sleep gummies, that don't work.
You try those? I buy every single one. What are they? CBD.

Speaker 2 Isn't that what it is, the sleep gummies? Some of them are like, oh, there's a dude.

Speaker 2 Fuck. I'm loving that you're deep into TikTok now.
I want to see your algorithm.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, it's crazy.

Speaker 2 Is it wild? The amount of stuff that I'm getting, I'm getting some bad stuff now. Okay, what are you getting? And then I'll share mine.

Speaker 2 Well, it depends on what your friends share with you because then you watch it and then it knows you watched it. Yeah.
I was getting a lot of like,

Speaker 2 guys.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. I'm not done.
I already know. Well, then you finish it.
Guys, I'm in the presence of a movie.

Speaker 2 What is it? What does she do? This is the worst.

Speaker 2 Guys, it's Pepper's last day. Oh, I fucking hate these videos.
Right. And I'm like, who's Pepper?

Speaker 2 You have to ask the question. Who is Pepper? Right.
And then they zoom down, right? And it's their fucking dog. It's their pet dog.
Yeah, yeah. And like, we just put the injection in.
Oh, God, dude.

Speaker 2 Right. And then everyone's crying.
I'm like, you're sharing such an intimate moment. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't want to see that. No, please.

Speaker 2 I don't want to see it. I don't want to see it.
I don't want to see it. This is going to kill me.
It's going to kill me, too. Please don't.
Get out. Get out.
Carlos. Get out.
Get out. Get out.

Speaker 2 Get out.

Speaker 2 Stop it. I hate those ones.

Speaker 2 What are the ones you hate? I'll be okay with a cat last day, but don't do a dog last day. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dog Last Day is is the worst. I hate those.

Speaker 2 I hate, I don't like when I see like a girl's like the get ready with me or whatever, and then they grab a thing and then they tap their fingernails on the

Speaker 2 ASMR.

Speaker 2 I don't like ASMR. It creeps me out.
You don't like ASMR? I tried to jerk off to an ASMR video once where it's just like it's J-O-I, you know, the instructions. There's one, and she's counting down.

Speaker 2 She's like, six, five. And I was like, I'm not ready.
I like when four.

Speaker 2 No,

Speaker 2 slow down. Yeah.
I love when it's ASMR scenarios.

Speaker 2 Welcome to A360. It gives me the shivers.
Do you see what it just did? Space station. Oh, I fucking don't like it.

Speaker 2 We're going to the planet Azurus.

Speaker 2 I swear to God. But please sit down.
We have to take some tests. Oh, girl.

Speaker 2 I don't like it. And I'm like, you know, my dick's in my hand, but I'm.

Speaker 2 My dick's in my hand, but I'm still zoned. It's great.
Oh, I'm going to, I'm going to Azurus. It creeps me out.

Speaker 2 I hate it. I'm going straight to Azurus, guys.
I don't know why it creeps me out so much. Yeah.
It just gives me this weird feeling. The voice.
It's like very motherly. It's like you're.

Speaker 2 I don't like that.

Speaker 2 It doesn't put you out. It creeps me out.
It gives me the tingles. I don't like it.
No, I like it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I like it, dude. There's something about it that throws me into a like a, it puts me in a, what is it?

Speaker 2 It gives me the ick. It gives you the ick.
That's what the kids say. What gives you the ick?

Speaker 2 So many things give me the ick, man.

Speaker 2 I got a real specific one that's really stupid. Oh, you wait.
Ick on the you mean on TikTok videos? No,

Speaker 2 in general? Life just grosses you out.

Speaker 2 My ick is this: when a girl goes, if I'm in a town like

Speaker 2 Boise. Love Boise.
We have the best sushi here. Oh, really? Yeah.
Do you? Yeah, and I, and I go,

Speaker 2 like, people from other cities come here and they eat our sushi. They're like, where? From fucking Peoria? Yeah.
You know what I mean? It's like, you've never had sushi.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you've never had real, right? Yeah. Real sushi.
It's crazy. Yeah, yeah.
Where is it? Oh, they got

Speaker 2 Ginza sushi grill and rubber.

Speaker 2 I've told you this before. Every time I play Charlie Goodnights.
In Charlotte? Yeah, there's Koreans that come. Come with us.
To where?

Speaker 2 Korea.

Speaker 2 Best in America. Well, it could be good.
Right? No, I went. Bad.
It's fucking terrible. It's like they don't know.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 Well, okay, let's talk about restaurants. Okay.

Speaker 2 Okay, we were in Phoenix. We went to Pizzeria.

Speaker 2 Where did we go? No, I just was there this weekend. Yeah, so I went to.
We went to Bianco. Oh, Pizzeria Bianco.
And they gave us, they're huge fans of ours, by the way. Yeah, they're great.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 And went to Bianco, and we're sitting there. It was great pizza, right? But it's like, and they can, and someone in Phoenix could say, you know what, we have one of the best pizza.
Sure.

Speaker 2 And I'll go, yes. Okay.
I agree. I agree.
Right. But

Speaker 2 what towns,

Speaker 2 wait,

Speaker 2 what towns do you think have the worst food? Oh, God.

Speaker 2 Oh, well, how about this? What towns do you think have the best food? Name five top cities? Best food cities? Yeah, restaurant cities. And be completely honest, in America.
New York. 100%.

Speaker 2 New York is easy. I'll back you on that.

Speaker 2 I would say. Chicago.
Chicago. Yeah.

Speaker 2 So our guest is here.

Speaker 2 Oh, come on in. Come on in.
Come say hi. Hi.

Speaker 2 Hi.

Speaker 2 How are you? Sit in this blue. How are you sitting down?

Speaker 1 Okay, shall I put the headphones on?

Speaker 2 If you don't want to, you don't have to. I'll put them on.

Speaker 2 You don't have to fuck up your hair if you don't want to. You have great hair.

Speaker 1 To be honest, it's been through a lot worse.

Speaker 2 Okay, God bless.

Speaker 2 Is that you that smells like that? Yeah.

Speaker 2 It smells so good.

Speaker 1 Howard shaved, shit, shower shave.

Speaker 2 It's got like a.

Speaker 1 It's like a Joe Malone perfume.

Speaker 2 Like a Joe Malone perfume. Joe Malone.

Speaker 2 God, I I love the accent. Australia or England? You take a guess, bud.
I say England. You say right.
Yeah. Which part of England, though? I don't know.
Well, take a guess. Brighton.
Oh, by the water.

Speaker 1 Oh, I think that's a bit of an insult.

Speaker 2 That's really

Speaker 2 from.

Speaker 1 I'm from Nottingham.

Speaker 2 Nottingham. It's from Nottingham Forest.
Very proper. In the Premier League, yeah.
Yes. Oh, you know,

Speaker 2 third in the league right now.

Speaker 1 Half my family is Derby. Half I'm a Nottingham family.

Speaker 2 Oh, wow. Darby, you haven't seen in the Premier League in a very long time.
No.

Speaker 2 Insult. That's an insult.

Speaker 2 No, but she's a... Are you a forest or Darby?

Speaker 1 In between, 20s, whoever's winning. Obviously, at the moment, Nottingham, so Nottingham.

Speaker 2 Big Nottingham fan.

Speaker 2 Are you engaged, by the way?

Speaker 1 No, going through a divorce.

Speaker 2 Oh, God bless.

Speaker 2 What happened?

Speaker 2 Can I take a guess?

Speaker 1 You've got a higher voice than me.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. What happened?

Speaker 2 Do you think was the divorce based on

Speaker 2 the sleeping with a thousand men? No. No, okay, right up.
That wasn't had nothing to do with it.

Speaker 2 Before that? Listen, I don't know what. I'm sorry, I don't

Speaker 2 know much. You don't know much about Sleeping With a Thousand? No, no, no, but I don't know.
I think you do, actually.

Speaker 2 Bonnie Blue slept with a thousand men at the end.

Speaker 2 Is that what happened? Is it one day?

Speaker 1 One day, 12 hours.

Speaker 2 12 hours. 12 hours.
Can I ask some questions?

Speaker 1 He's got to do it. Fire away.

Speaker 2 Yes, really?

Speaker 1 Give me a load.

Speaker 2 One for one.

Speaker 2 Because let's just say, if I was a guy. You are.

Speaker 2 I know. Thank you.

Speaker 2 And I fucked a thousand women, right? I would have to pick the... Do you get to pick the women?

Speaker 1 No, I don't get to pick the guys.

Speaker 2 Oh, you don't?

Speaker 1 But in your scenario, okay, yeah, if you wanted to pick the women, we can.

Speaker 2 But you didn't pick the guys then. No.
So just any old look,

Speaker 2 you know?

Speaker 1 Gingers, Asians, anyone.

Speaker 2 Really? That's us. That's us.
Wait a minute.

Speaker 2 83 guys an hour. An hour?

Speaker 2 83 an hour.

Speaker 1 It was like, you know, that game you play as a kid and you put your hand in the box and you don't know what you're going to get?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a British thing.
I don't know that. Well, you cracker jack box.

Speaker 1 In box, pick out present.

Speaker 2 No, she's saying not cracker jack box. No, no, like the prize at the bottom.
No, dude, she's saying there's a game where they put their hand in a box and they don't know what's in there.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we don't play that in America. I just said that.
Yeah, oh, thank you.

Speaker 2 Sorry, sorry. Fucked.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is the game? Well, like in Dune.
Yeah, it's like in Dune. Yeah, like in Dune with the picture.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it.

Speaker 1 I don't know what Dune is, but

Speaker 2 the movie Dune. They move into Dune.
Yeah, that box. There's a box.
There's a box.

Speaker 2 That's like what you guys did at Christmas, right?

Speaker 2 So, could I have, could I, could I have applied?

Speaker 1 Of course, we don't need to apply, you just turn up. That's a good thing.
As long as you are 18.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you are. You're 18 times four, actually.
Yeah. Am I too old? That could be like an eye.
Yeah, do you have a ceiling? Do you have a limit? Is there an age limit?

Speaker 2 But if a guy shows up and he's 70, do you say no?

Speaker 1 No, of course not.

Speaker 2 You don't care.

Speaker 1 One, his wife might be dead, so obviously. That's true.
And second of all, like, it's a bit of a day out for him. It's better than bird watching.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but I don't know. Old guys are like

Speaker 2 72nd in line 72nd's not that far. There's a thousand.
Oh, there is a thousand. I'm 430.
Like, would you be able to keep it up? Are you watching porn to keep it up?

Speaker 1 So some of them are in the basement. So

Speaker 1 I'll give you a bit of a picture.

Speaker 2 These guys all live in a basement, by the way. Yeah, yeah.
For the records.

Speaker 1 It's like a three-story house. I'm at the top floor.
So by the time they start queuing on the stairs, they're queuing for like sometimes four or five hours.

Speaker 1 They bring the packed lunch, they bring your drink. It's like a picnic.

Speaker 2 Bring a packed lunch. Yeah.
Honey, I packed you a lunch for your fuck today. It's like that Guardian of the Galaxy ride at Disneyland.
Yeah, it takes two hours to get on it.

Speaker 2 It takes forever to get there.

Speaker 1 And then the ride only lasts about 10 seconds. Oh, well.

Speaker 2 Also, how long do I get?

Speaker 1 About 40 seconds.

Speaker 2 All right, but since we know each other, you'll never get there.

Speaker 2 40 seconds, dude. You're out in like 12.
Oh, no, no, no. Just because the thought of other guys that have been in there, you get so excited.

Speaker 2 That gets him so excited. Because I know that he's going to be right before me.
He's 431. You know what I mean? I'm going to be at the house.
Oh, fuck. Can we switch? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 You can just push his paragraph and you know, mix it up.

Speaker 2 That's right. I'm still stuck on the bring in the pack lunch.
That's so fun. Do people trade like snack cups? So, like, what if you didn't get something and you saw something else?

Speaker 2 I just think that's so funny in line. Being like, kiddie, can I have the cookie? How many seconds did she say? 40.

Speaker 2 40 seconds. And then once I was talking about it.

Speaker 1 I thought you only had problems with your eyesight, not your hearing.

Speaker 1 Maybe I should come a bit closer.

Speaker 2 She loves you, dude. I love her so much.
And so they all wear ski masks. Yeah.
Those always wear skin skins.

Speaker 1 They don't all have to but like if they're like got girlfriends or they've got like certain jobs and you want people finding out sure i want them to go and feel feeling confident but they still have to be on camera yeah of course who is that guy in the first frame there with the big teeth with the red jumper on his name's called bevo he went viral for like swallowing food he's a big tooth guy i've seen him on instagram you've seen this guy he's got huge teeth

Speaker 2 and that's the bit right that he has big teeth hydro i caught it You they gave me one. I got one at the house.
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Speaker 1 Well, no, he basically went viral just for like not swallowing food properly.

Speaker 2 Really? Yeah. Do you charge? No, of course not.
Why? You could make a killing. No.
$10.

Speaker 2 I bet she's doing fine.

Speaker 1 No, I want to say thank you. Because of those people in the queue, I've got to where I am.
So, like, I want to thank them.

Speaker 2 I want to do something for them. That's so nice.
Wow. That's what a gracious.
You're just a sweet gracious. You're like Mother Teresa in a different way.
Different type of charity work. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Do you live in

Speaker 2 England now or here?

Speaker 2 London. You live in London.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know why I said that. I made that up.
I live in Nottingham.

Speaker 2 You lied.

Speaker 1 I'm in London a lot.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But now.

Speaker 2 We're going there. We're going there.
We're going to London in the summer. And this summer we're playing.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I don't like that it's called OVO.
We mentioned that twice. I don't really like the Drake thing.

Speaker 1 I wonder who would have a bigger cue, me or you two?

Speaker 2 Oh, how about this? You take dicks outside of the arena. We'll do laughs inside.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'll warm them off to you.

Speaker 2 You know how nice that would be? Yeah. For them to get a nut off and then come laugh.
I mean, they'd all fall asleep halfway through the show. Yeah.
Who would get a bigger line? I wonder.

Speaker 2 How many tickets do you think you could sell to a show? If you did a live show of you.

Speaker 1 What, a live sex show?

Speaker 2 Yeah, a live sex show.

Speaker 1 I don't know, to be honest.

Speaker 2 We sold 50,000 in Australia. Beat that.

Speaker 1 I got banned from Australia.

Speaker 2 What? Really?

Speaker 2 Wait, why?

Speaker 1 Fucking barely legals.

Speaker 2 Wait, you got banned because of people underage?

Speaker 1 No. So basically, women are poorly educated when it comes to sex and understanding the porn industry.

Speaker 1 And they made this massive petition saying, oh, let's get Bonnie Blue banned from Australia for sleeping with people underage and not consenting.

Speaker 1 They are consenting and they are 18. So then this petition basic blew up in Australia and they took my visa away.

Speaker 2 The government banned you.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 2 We would never do that in America. You know that.
You're welcome. It's the greatest country in the world.
We would never do that. Trump would never let that happen.

Speaker 2 He will rename Bodies of Water, but he will make sure you can do what you want legally. So now it's OnlyFans, right? Yeah.
That's like the big, that's the thing. That's only you must make a killing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's good money. Good.

Speaker 2 Is it posted? You know how people post what they make? We can see what everybody makes. Is that true? No.
If you you allow it?

Speaker 1 No, I have it so you can see how many subscribers and stuff.

Speaker 2 How many subs are on there now? 400,000. Holy shit.
Holy shit. Holy shit, man.
Half a million people almost. They watch all.
And do you post shit every day?

Speaker 1 Yeah, like every day I post things, but they're probably doing like new videos twice a week. Wow.

Speaker 2 I'm interested. The divorce thing, when did this happen? Was this in the beginning of this? Or did divorce spark this? Now I want to have a sexcapade?

Speaker 1 No, no, no. So we were together from when I was 14.
So we were.

Speaker 2 How old was he?

Speaker 1 15. He's only like a year older.

Speaker 2 Don't worry. We was together.
Woo.

Speaker 2 We used to get out. I was 14.
He was 38.

Speaker 2 Holy shit.

Speaker 1 I mean, I do like the older ones.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Right. Now, that is.
Now we can't do that in America. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 What, go from barely legal to barely breathing? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah. So what, you were 14, he was 15, and you got married at how old?

Speaker 1 20. Oh, yeah, young.
So it was like together like a long time. We just grew apart.
Like, there was no dramatic split up or anything like that. We just grew apart naturally.

Speaker 2 And then do you talk to him now still?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, he works with me oh is this him

Speaker 2 i'd love it if this is the guy who's this guy right here no he helps me like on the creative side with video and editing he's also he's also a handsome guy off camera you can't see him and he's big he's got good thick thighs dude he's a thick daddy over there huh well he looks like a john wick nemesis he does where's my dog yeah he'll be weird he's very beautiful though He is.

Speaker 2 You are. Oh, thank you.
I find him more attractive, if I'm being honest. But that's just different things.

Speaker 1 It depends which way you sway.

Speaker 2 What's that to say? Why can't I just say to another person that they're beautiful? What's the problem?

Speaker 2 Why'd you laugh at me? Because she didn't even hear you. She didn't register your.
Yeah, she did. I said thank you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, she said thank you.

Speaker 2 How old do you think he is, by the way? Unless you already know.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, I actually don't know. Take a guess.

Speaker 2 This is good. Do you know this guy might know?

Speaker 1 No. 36.

Speaker 2 See, how amazing is that? 36.

Speaker 1 Is that accurate or no?

Speaker 2 He's 38. Oh, no, I'm 53.
He's 53. Oh, are you? Yes, thank you.

Speaker 1 I thought they just said, Black don't cry.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we don't either.

Speaker 2 36? That's 30.

Speaker 2 I'm not mad.

Speaker 2 Relax, dude. Shut the fuck up.
Let it on, dude. That's good stuff.
She just said you were 36. Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's not nothing. What happened before that?

Speaker 2 I wonder. You're doing really well.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Look, you didn't want to talk about the girl you just met in France. All right.
So, all right. All right.
Okay. All right.
Okay. Anyway.
All right. Okay.
So there. Yeah.
Welcome. How old am I?

Speaker 2 See?

Speaker 1 I want to go 42.

Speaker 2 See? Yeah. Every time.
I look younger. I know.
Yeah. This guy looks younger than me.

Speaker 2 God damn.

Speaker 1 you're giving schoolboy vibes

Speaker 2 he does you're gonna turn me off mommy i love you don't do that i want td my mom

Speaker 2 oh i've looked 40 since i was a fucking kid

Speaker 2 finally i look like 42 45 so um how old are you 25 25. yeah well you know i mean

Speaker 2 you look 20s but it ages you doesn't it I don't know. It's actually

Speaker 1 hydration. Yeah.
Like, you know. That's actually true.
It's cheaper than a gym membership.

Speaker 2 So this is at what? You, like, rent a house?

Speaker 1 So there's a guy called Lord Davenport, and like, he holds, like, crazy parties. Yeah.

Speaker 2 The British are so funny. No, wait, wait.
Wait, there's a lot of people. Come to Lord Davenport.

Speaker 2 And fuck Bunny Blue. Give me Lord Davenport.
I got to see this fucking guy. In LA, there's a guy named Lord Davenport.

Speaker 2 Clearly, this guy's in England.

Speaker 2 Lord Davenport.

Speaker 2 I want to know him. I don't know any Lords.
But there's a guy downtown LA that thinks his name is Lord Davenport. So this guy has a house that you are at.

Speaker 1 That was the house I fucked in.

Speaker 2 Wow. Wow, that's Lord Davenport.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 obviously you had to hook up with him uh no i didn't actually really lord lord d didn't take any fucking anything for the house huh no wow shocked is he a good guy this guy yeah lovely it says fraudster what did he do to make his money oh i don't know so that sounds like a him problem yeah that certainly does sorry about that they call him fast eddie davenport self-are you super famous now in england or around the world i mean um a little bit yeah yeah how do you like it Yeah, it's just weird that I never thought like being a slut would make you famous.

Speaker 1 Like, I know the Kardashians have got experience with it.

Speaker 1 I didn't know that was going to be me.

Speaker 2 What were you like in high school?

Speaker 1 First, I lose my virginity, but like, as a whole, I was a dance teacher at the time. I enjoyed working, very mature for my age.

Speaker 2 And you lost your virginity in high school, you just said?

Speaker 2 No, yeah. What year in high school?

Speaker 1 When I was 13. I don't know what year that'd be for you.

Speaker 2 Well, that's not high school out here. That's middle school or elementary school.
Yeah. Yeah.
High school is your 15, right? 14, 15? 15, 14, 15, 15, yeah, 13, yeah, I was young.

Speaker 2 Wow, wow, and how old was he? 14. Yeah,

Speaker 2 quick, it was probably quick.

Speaker 1 Christ 14. He literally put it in and was like, oh my god, I'm pregnant.
Like, we had no idea what I was doing. And I think, like, people's first experiences are always bad.

Speaker 1 You never know what you're doing.

Speaker 2 Like, it's a bit of a flop. See, that's what I keep telling you.
I'm still going to be fine. I'm scared.
Have you had pregnancy scares?

Speaker 1 Well, apparently I'm pregnant at the moment.

Speaker 2 Are you? The media. Yeah.
Yeah. But you're not.
Oh, you're not. I am not pregnant.
Oh, well, still clap for not. Have you ever been? No.
Okay. Wow.
Wow, that's cool.

Speaker 1 It was suddenly rumored that it was like, oh, my God, Bonnie's pregnant. And it's actually the first time I've let them continue with the story and I've not sort of commented.

Speaker 1 And actually, I've made jokes about it. And like last night I posted on Instagram, oh, I've got cravings and just allowed people to control them.

Speaker 2 That's so good. You should do a photo shoot of you with a baby bump.

Speaker 1 No, because I'm actually really against that.

Speaker 2 What do you mean?

Speaker 1 I think it is horrible because those women can't get pregnant or they are in difficult situations. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 So I'm actually to say i'm not a girl's girl i'm gonna be a girl's girl this week because i want to use the media and the attention i've got from people thinking i'm pregnant to pay for people's ivf because i don't think

Speaker 2 amazing

Speaker 2 see this guy's looking at me funny what's up bud he likes you dude yeah yeah bloke bloke or what

Speaker 2 bloke are you a hooligan or what he knows a few english

Speaker 2 vibes right

Speaker 2 hello mate that a problem

Speaker 2 fucking guy look at that dog dude imagine how bad that guy would break you i know i know that's why why I have to.

Speaker 2 I know what you're doing. You're fighting the biggest guy in the jail cell.
You'll kill me. You'll destroy me, but you know what I mean? So, you're security.

Speaker 2 He does security. Anybody shit, dog.
If anybody comes. Dude, don't get

Speaker 2 what's up, bro. Oh, bro.
He's good. He's good or what? Here it goes.
Bro. Here it goes, dude.
See that shit, dude? Uh-uh.

Speaker 2 This is Thug Bobby. He gets real tough.
Sorry, sir. Do whatever you want.

Speaker 2 I know.

Speaker 1 I've heard you've had a hard upbringing, so I can imagine you're tough.

Speaker 2 100%. Let's turn this into a business.
Can we charge for FastPass?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 But that way, like a guy like me, I can buy a Fast Pass, cut in line, buy another FastPass, so I'm constantly

Speaker 2 again. You know what I mean? What if you just fake it? Like if a guy in a wheel is in

Speaker 2 disabled? Any disabilities? Dude.

Speaker 2 Who gets to board first?

Speaker 2 I could play 14 Asians. Yeah, you can.
You know what I mean? I can go at all. Right? At all.
Right?

Speaker 2 You know what I mean? I could mix it up, dude. Right? And you just

Speaker 2 put a mustache on, right? Nice. Alley long wig.
You know what I mean? I could do all kinds of stuff, dude. What do you think? I believe it.
Yeah, I'm Sundra Oh, or whatever. You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 Whoa. You know what you should do? You really want to appeal to the Americans? Do veterans.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 A veteran thing, dude. Do a USO tour.
Yeah. U.S.
open up that mouth. U.S.O.
tour. The veterans would be very appreciative.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that would be fun.

Speaker 2 Especially because these guys, a lot of them have PTSD. A lot of them have, you know, mental health issues and they feel abandoned by their country.
I think you should do that. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And sometimes we could do a theme like Vietnam. Yeah, do Vietnam.
Yeah, right. We can have a little trail.
Right, like a trail to your vagina, right? I could play as

Speaker 2 Vietnamese, like Viet Cong.

Speaker 2 I would have a bushes there. I'm like,

Speaker 2 you know what I mean? And do the sound, right? You know what I mean? And firecrackers. Yeah.
So they can get into the PTSD of it, right? You know what I mean? Too.

Speaker 2 Everybody.

Speaker 1 We can get them into character. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 And then we'll get you Chinese eyes too.

Speaker 1 I know. I was thinking about a fox lift, but then I don't know if we'd end up looking like twins.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 We should do a theme where everyone in line is named Charlie. Just all Charlie.
Yeah, Charlie. Yeah.
Yeah. I think it's a good theme.

Speaker 1 I mean, Bobby, what is your name?

Speaker 2 What? What's my name? Yeah. Bobby.

Speaker 1 No, your real name.

Speaker 2 My Korean name. My Korean name, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because my name's not Bonnie.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Well, on my birthday particular, it says Robert, but my Korean name is Song-uh. Song-uh.
Yeah. Yeah, Bobby's easier.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's easier.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's easier. Do you know what Song-uh means? Yes.
No. Success.
Success. Then look at what happened.
Yeah. Guy.
No, he. Hey, relax.
Stop trying to fight that guy. Tiny piece of shit.

Speaker 2 You never say your real name, do you? Tia. Oh, you do? Yeah.
I love you. You say your full legal name? Yeah, Tia Beninja is my full name.
Tia Beninja. Tia's great.
Do you have sisters? Yeah, I do.

Speaker 1 I've got a sister called Summer. Oh.
She's got bigger boobs, so I feel like we're doing it the wrong way, right?

Speaker 2 What does she do? She's like a nurse or something?

Speaker 1 No, she just helps me with like adding.

Speaker 2 Oh, she works for you. Oh, that's cool.
How about mom and dad? Alive?

Speaker 1 Yeah, both alive.

Speaker 2 Stoked? What do they say about this?

Speaker 2 What's dinner at mom and dad's house like?

Speaker 1 Just cream pies after cream pies.

Speaker 2 Wow. Wow.
Yeah, wow.

Speaker 2 You play the dad. I play the mom.
All right. Bonnet.
So, Tia. Bonnet, sit down.
We ought to talk to you about something. Yeah.
What excuse me? My daughter's name is Tia. Oh, that's right.

Speaker 2 That's right. Tia.
My bad.

Speaker 2 So how's the coffee? How's been?

Speaker 2 Work. How's it work?

Speaker 1 Glowing in. It's been good.

Speaker 2 You know, daddy's proud of you.

Speaker 1 Very proud.

Speaker 2 Very proud. He came to one of your events, sweetie.
Well, I wait. He was wearing a mask.

Speaker 2 I wore the mask of a Chinese man.

Speaker 1 I mean, I do like bringing family members together, so why not my own?

Speaker 2 What does mom and dad say?

Speaker 1 Honestly, they are so proud.

Speaker 2 They're still, yeah, of course.

Speaker 1 And everyone thinks, oh, that's so weird. And you know what? It's not.
My dad has worked two jobs his whole life. Now he doesn't have to work.

Speaker 2 You pay for your dad. Yeah.
Yeah, that's great.

Speaker 1 And my mom, like, and people think it's weird, but like, my dad had to miss birthdays. Christmas says he had to go to work.
Now, like, money can't necessarily buy happiness, but it can buy time.

Speaker 1 My family now have so much more time together.

Speaker 2 That's great. See, my family are immigrants, so they don't know what I never, they've never really known what I've done, do that I do.

Speaker 1 They just don't know.

Speaker 2 They don't know, but they know that I make money and they know that it's, you know, I mean, that I have a skill set. Yeah.
So they just kind of accept it and go, you know, he's happy. He's safe.

Speaker 2 He's making money. He takes care of us.
But they don't essentially know really what it is. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Unless they, like, if I pop on a squid games or something, my mom would be like, well, that's that he is, you know what I mean, or whatever. But, like, you know, but you're not on Squid Games, buddy.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I know, dude. One day, they're making another season.

Speaker 1 Is that the goal in life?

Speaker 2 No, he wants to be on Squid Games. The goal in life is to keep doing this.

Speaker 2 Get the fuck out of here.

Speaker 2 When are you doing your next one?

Speaker 1 Well, the next one is like spring break.

Speaker 2 So I'm going to get pancake for a week and then get

Speaker 2 Carlos go. Carlos wants to go.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 100%. Get you in a little schoolboy outfit straight in.

Speaker 2 She likes it. Oh, the guitars from ACDC.
Do that. Yeah, take off your hat, though.
Show her what the schoolboy would look like with this hat.

Speaker 2 Look at that, dude. Look at this.
Yeah, yeah, do that. Bonnie, can I still go?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, no, you can still go.

Speaker 1 I've probably got more hair on my legs, but we're all good.

Speaker 2 Wow. Wait, can I call you Tia?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you can call me Tia.

Speaker 2 Are you on the apps? Are you dating?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I don't know how dating would work now.

Speaker 1 Like, do I go in as a disguise, put an Asian outfit on, and just say, look, I'm really innocent.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you could. You could.
You really could.

Speaker 2 I mean, he's been banned off a couple of apps. He's because I lied about my age.
He lies about his age.

Speaker 2 But it's fine.

Speaker 2 It's harmless. He just.
You think he's 36, didn't you? Yeah, I did. I did.
So there you go.

Speaker 1 I mean, I will be inviting you to my queue because I do want the disabled.

Speaker 2 Fuck you.

Speaker 2 I love that. Sorry, sir.

Speaker 2 Does LA feel different than England?

Speaker 1 Yeah, definitely.

Speaker 2 What the fuck? I haven't been there in years. I don't know.

Speaker 2 Is it gloomy? It's so different.

Speaker 1 It's like saying, does a ginger feel different than an Asian inside? Like, you can't feel different.

Speaker 2 Us, we feel identical. Bonnie,

Speaker 2 where can people follow us? Where are you going to post the video?

Speaker 1 Online. I don't know which platform exactly.

Speaker 2 And you're going to sell it, right? Yeah. Wow.
How much are you going to charge for it? I've not worked it out yet.

Speaker 1 Maybe like $70, $80.

Speaker 2 $80.

Speaker 1 It's a very long video.

Speaker 2 Yeah, just do, but just do $100. Make it flat $100.
Yeah, I could do it. $100 feels like a

Speaker 2 $70, $80, you're kissing $100, just make it 100 flat.

Speaker 1 Dude, like 99.99.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yes, yes, yes. $99,

Speaker 2 99 pence. Oh, my God.
Think about that, dude.

Speaker 1 I think when people buy it as well, they're not buying it thinking, oh, yeah, I'm really horny and want to work like something.

Speaker 1 It's art.

Speaker 2 It's like the same treat. Yeah.
Yeah. Mascot Live or whatever.
It is more fat. It's more fascination.
It's more like

Speaker 2 it's more voyeuristic than sexual. Yeah.
People just want to watch it because they can't believe it.

Speaker 1 It's like a mixture. Everyone's got like a different story.
Like these with one guy, he brought his mum.

Speaker 1 that's tough that's tough yeah and then his mum was like banging on the door like joseph get your coat we're going

Speaker 2 out there like really joseph hurry up and finish was he late for something yeah i don't know like i don't know why he brought his mum in the first place joseph

Speaker 1 no his mum was like joseph get your course joseph oh that's so crazy joseph wow we have to go to asda wow yeah

Speaker 1 that is crazy man and then it's like a clip as as he's leaving his mum's putting his hat on his scarf on coat back on and then they went out for dinner.

Speaker 2 Wow, sweet,

Speaker 2 sweet. Take your mom out to dinner.
Where did they go eat?

Speaker 1 They went to Nando's, actually.

Speaker 2 Oh, Nando's good. Oh, we have Nando's.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, we have chicken. Chicken chicken.
It's a South African business, isn't it? South Africa. Yeah.
Anyway, let's be fine. I think it is.
It's going to be out on your website.

Speaker 2 When does it come out?

Speaker 1 I'm not sure. It's going to be soon.

Speaker 2 You haven't decided the date?

Speaker 1 I haven't decided a date just yet.

Speaker 2 Smart. £100.
£100 great British pounds. But he'll get the video for free.

Speaker 1 I'll send it to you. I'll buy it.
I do want your load first, though. I feel like in return.

Speaker 2 Sorry,

Speaker 1 do we have a translator? Yeah, no, no, no.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I'll go ahead. I'll tell you.
What do you mean, Minal Lol? He's saying, what are you trying to ask him right now?

Speaker 1 Okay, I like to get on my back and you put your dick inside me.

Speaker 2 He said, that sounds fun. I'm a little nervous about it.
I'm a little nervous about it.

Speaker 2 He says, but I am hard right now.

Speaker 1 Okay, could you tell him I've had a lot of experience with Asians and I don't think they've got small dicks?

Speaker 2 Ah, he got it. Yeah, he's fine.

Speaker 2 He's fine. I'm very fine with it.

Speaker 2 Well, that'll be an exchange. We'll do a nice little exchange.
That'll be foreign exchange. Yeah.
We'll call it foreign exchange. We'll fix it.
I'm sweating. I just said, you know.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're nervous about it. Yeah, yeah, I'm nervous.
You made him horny. I won't be looking hard.
It'll be just too much pressure. No, you could do it.
Maybe I get Blue Chew.

Speaker 2 Maybe put some Blue Chew. Yeah, I want to get one of our sponsors to help us out.

Speaker 2 And then you'll need better help. Blue Chew, Blue Chew.

Speaker 2 Right after it. We'll double down.
All right, so look for the Bonnie Blue tape. Bonnie Blue.
Thanks for coming, by the way. Thank you.
Give her a run. That was fun.
Ben, Bonnie Blue.

Speaker 2 All right, check this out. We end the show.
You look into your camera and just say, thank you for being a bad friend. Do it in your little spin, however, you would do it.

Speaker 1 Okay. Thank you for being a bad friend.
Next time, you'll see.

Speaker 2 That's a great way to end the episode.