Shaka Spirit & ComicCon Nerds

You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude.
You two are disgusting. You two are something.
We're bad friends. I got a movie offer to go to Budapest.
Yeah, yeah, I know. I told you to take it.
No, I don't know if I'm going to do it. You have to take it.
There's no money. I know, but it's still like, who's in it? Marmaduke's Lickamoo.
Dude, she's on fire. They.
Oh, they are on fire, but Marmaduke and Sycamoo, though. Sycamoo's not.
Sycamoo's a boy. Sycamoo's a boy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, but Marmaduke is there. Marmaduke is there.
Toto Candy is in it, right? She got cut. Oh, Toto Candy got cut, dude.
But Toto, did you see her in Delivery of Mine?

One or two.

Delivery of Mine, two, I think.

Yeah, I was two.

The second one was in Portuguese, right?

Yeah.

I like that they don't- But Toto, woof, woof, woof.

I mean, she played a wolf.

And dude.

So good.

The best wolf you've ever seen in your life.

Yeah.

Woof, woof.

Amazing. Did we ever show that video, that girl who let the wolves lick the inside of her mouth? Look, there's a video of it.
She'll open her mouth. Wolf kissing.
Ew, yucky. Yeah.
How many diseases did she catch? She dope, but the mouth licking. She dope.
Would have threw up everywhere. Please don't watch three minutes, three minutes four seconds in well that's a wild wolf she didn't get straight up straight up so anyway for those of you watching yeah the wolf licked my mouth so what i love wolves that's toto that's the girl we were talking oh yeah there she is toto she's very good so i don't know if you've been to comic-con but that's my first and last time i'll tell you that right now well you went and you were with my friends which i love two of my dearest i love them so much yeah and you know i've never have you been to comic-con oh my lord once yeah one time i went comedy central paid me to go down and i had to do the intros for the workaholics guys they were doing like a thing I had to go down and do that and it was so embarrassing so I'll tell you what you see and it's a wonderful thing and I just have to say it's a beautiful thing you watch you see different varieties of your favorite characters I saw Spinal Bifida Spider-Man I saw Fat Laura Croft are you sure? Yeah it was Fat Laura Croft Are you sure? Yeah because I was like She doesn't raid tomb She raids the refrigerator I know Fat Laura Croft And then I swear to God And this is It doesn't sound mean But this actually happened Yeah So I'm During the day I'm smoking a cigarette Because I had to do a bunch of events, right? I'm outside, and I see maybe a four or five-year-old boy.
I'm pretty sure it was a boy. In a Batman outfit, in a carriage.
Mom was, you know what I mean, rolling. Right.
And the kid was doing this. I don't know what he had.
I don't know. Maybe he was excited, but he was going like this.
He was going... Like that, right? No.

It's not a joke.

I'm not making fun.

I'm not laughing.

Yeah, he was going,

right, right.

And then I heard the mom go,

we're almost there, Batman.

And I go, that's not Batman.

That's a bat.

Okay.

Filipino bat.

Filipino bat.

All right.

That's what I saw.

No, but why did you- It's literally what I saw. You didn't- All these these characters you described It just sounds like you were at Kill Tony So funny dude Alright here's another thing that I noticed What you do at Comic Con I do but let's be nice Because a lot of our friends and family We We love them.
Here's the deal. Comic-Con brings out the best of insults.
The best of the insults. They're the ones that don't shoot up things.
Star Wars saved their lives. Yeah.
Is Comic-Con like Anime Expo? Yes. Yes.
It's down in San Diego. it's been going on for i don't know 30 40 years right i have no idea but people dress up that's fun images at comic-con it is really fun i have a couple more things i gotta get off my chest i'm sorry we'll talk about what it is i gotta get off my chest okay but show her images while he tells you so she can see what it's like look at at that.
So this week, who was there? It was Deadpool was there.

So I guess Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds did Thursday or something.

Oh, wow.

It was what it was.

Robert Downey Jr.

Robert Downey Jr. was there.

What is he promoting?

He's playing Dr.

He's now MCU universe.

Yeah.

He's now Dr. Doom.

Wow.

He's now Dr. Doom.
And so I was there for the movie. I'm on Borderlands.
Yeah. He's now Dr.
Doom. Wow.
He's now Dr. Doom.

And so I was there for the movie.

I'm on Borderlands.

Okay.

And so what I noticed what I do is when you're there at Comic-Con and you're at a party,

you find yourself lying all the time.

Yeah.

So I'll give you an example.

I'm at a party.

Okay.

Like the Entertainment Weekly party. Yeah.
Kid comes out. you an example.
I'm at a party, okay? Like the Entertainment Weekly Party.

Yeah, kid comes out.

Bad friends, man, fuck!

And I go, what's up?

What's up?

Right?

Yeah.

And they go, I'm a big fan.

I go, yeah, what do you do?

Dude, I'm in Rings of Power.

And then you have to go, it's a good show.

Oh, I love Rings of Power.

Oh, my God, the arrows?

Oh.

The arrows are surrealistic, and also the trees.

Well, the rings are probably the ones. And the rings are so good.
Oh, you're so good. So good.
Yeah, oh, man. It's the best show I've ever seen.
You have to constantly do that. Right.
You know what I mean? Like, oh, my God. Or you could just not.
Let me just try. Okay, ready? You're the guy.
Hey. Oh, man.
No, I. Bad friends.
No, no. Oh, I love you guys.
No, no. You got the rules wrong.
Dude, I love you guys. You got the rules wrong.
You're the one that has to lie. Okay, you're the guy.
Oh, God. Goddamn, dude.
All right. Chaka.
Yeah, yeah. Chaka it out, dude.
Oh, dude. Santino.
Man. Firefly.
What's up, Rhett? Man, I'm spinning. Hold on one second.
Oh, you're the DJ? Hey, dude. Anyway, love bad friends.
Uh-huh. Yeah, thank you, dog.
Oh, me? I'm in the new Star Wars thing. Yeah? Blank eyes.
I'm in blank eyes. Star Wars.
Oh, what are you in? Blank eyes. Blind eyes? Blank eyes.
Oh, blank eyes. Yeah, yeah.
Oh, I haven't seen it. Yeah.
Oh, you would say that. Take it easy.
Oh, you don't lie. Why wouldn't you? Why would you say that? You're right.
I haven't seen it yeah oh you would say that take it easy oh you don't lie why wouldn't you why would you you're right i haven't seen why i lie you you lie no you don't lie don't lie then i just learned that no you know what though you probably made him feel good and he's listening by the way he's a fan no but here he so now this kid yeah okay he lives in perth are we playing perth we are playing perth. All right, so he is one of the main kids in the eyes of the power.
What's it? Oh, yeah. Ring, rings.
Yeah, ring, rings. Look it up.
Yeah, the rings of power. He's in the hills have eyes? Yeah.
He's the kid in the rings of power. And I said, so I gave him my number.
So when we're in Perth, we're going to bring him to the show. Okay, cool.
Yeah, yeah. Last thing I want to say is, also, you just realized I'm just, we're not, what? Is that him? Yeah, that's him.
Cool. Good kid.
Tyro, well, how do you, zoom in. How do you say his name? Yeah, yeah, that's him for sure.
How old is he? He's a kid. Relax.
Relax. You know what she's, you're not.
That's why I'm asking. I know what you're doing.
You little pervert. What are you, the fucking Filipino Leo? How old? Yeah.
How do you say his name? Tyro Mahafedan? Yeah. Good kid.
You know, isn't that? That's not Filipino. Sure it is.
Do you think he's hot? He's cute. Yeah, he's a good looking kid.
And you would? He's young. No.
Oh, you wouldn't? How old is that kid? How old is Tufayamakamakam? 18. Yeah.
Oh, he's too young. Yeah.
You're only two years older than him. That's still weird.
I don't want to be a cougar. Well.
Okay, hello. Yeah.
What's a Filipino cougar? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A wombat? What is it? Okay, here's the last thing I want to talk about, and then we'll move on to Comic-Con.
No, we can do more Comic-Con. There's a couple more.
Was Kevin Hart there? Yeah, he was. And this is, I'm not kidding you.
I didn't see him, but he was maybe three feet away from me. No.
An army comes in first. Yeah.
Right? He's got a bubble of an army, and he in the middle did he say hi no nothing man he comes in does all the press thing i was literally five feet away from him and i was trying to leak look through his bodyguard so that i can find a space you know be through like and then go look through the like an armpit or whatever and go what's, man? You know what I mean? Couldn't even find that. Wow.
Right. Then he leaves.
Then Edgar Ramirez is in the line. He's awesome.
Yeah, he's great. And I go, hey, man.
You know what I mean? Because I was behind the camp people interviewing him. He goes, hey.
And he kind of went, do I? And then he goes, oh, yeah. It was like one of those.
And then. He didn't know you were in the movie? Yeah.

Jamie was there, too, in the building.

Didn't see her once.

Really?

Dude, I'm telling you right now.

I think they hid these people. I'm going to say something.

Because there was two groups.

Did you see the robot?

Yeah, the robot was there, dude.

The robot was there.

That's somebody I really want to see.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so what I realized is there was two groups.

There was the main group.

Stars. The stars.
And then there was like. People in the movie.
Yeah. Yeah.
Hair, makeup. You know what I mean? People in the movie.
Right. And so then after they left, then we did the thing.
Right. But we were separated.
Separated. Is that when you texted me? What did I say? Yeah.
You want me to say it? No. Why? You texted me and I called you immediately because I know when he texts me, I know when he's in a mood and he just wrote, I feel like a loser.
And it hurt my heart. Yeah, yeah.
So I called you immediately and I was like, what are you talking about? What's going on? And then you need to get that out of your head. Yeah, I know.
Because you're a was driving to san diego they had they had my own car they picked me up from my house love it driving down my shades on like tony stark you know i mean and then by the end you know i mean just you know like you just you know it because it's just what's so funny man was that were you batman yeah by the end i'm batman i'm batman no but um because then you go to the parties i went to two parties and then once you know i ended up going playing jenga at the ig party not instagram um ign it's a video game company oh yeah yeah yeah and there was a corner and there was a bunch of like don't want want to make fun of them, good guys, because they became friends with them, all of them. They were all nerds.
Yeah. You know what I mean? Hey, buddy, what's going on, man? You know what I mean? It's Comic-Con.
What? It's Comic-Con. That's all there.
It's coming on? It's Comic-Con. It's only nerds.
Don't say words like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You can't say words like that. That's what he says when he comes on his wife.
It's Comic-Con. It's Comic-Con.
It's Comic-Con. Oh, Andres.ikan.
And she's like, no Kamikan. Si, si, si.
Si, si, si. It's Kamikan.
Right. So these nerds were like, hey man, you want to play Jenga? I swear to God.
Why not? There's probably hours of videos out there of me playing Jenga with people. I played Jenga all night long.
Did you win? I won one. Hell yeah.

And I lost one. Hell yeah.
Right? But

what a game. I never even heard of it before.

Shut the fuck up. You've never heard of it.

I thought they were building

something. Well, they are.
No, but they were

taking away. That's right.
But then

you rebuild on top. This is the story of life.

That's the story of life. Dude, that's so good.

Giveth, taketh away. Shaka, dude.
Shaka.

Shaka, shaka shaka so um i played

jenga all night and then the entertainment weekly party last night that's the hot one it's like that's the one the real people are there there's the deadpool people there's um what's the rings of power people and i want to say some things about them i will not okay okay i will not i just Just the arrogance, but I will not.

Oh.

But then there was this half chinese half white dude handsome but he looked like maybe like a wolverine but he wasn't wolverine and he goes hey man i'm in mortal combat i go okay relax dude and he goes he's lu kang no so i'm also in deadpool wow and i he goes, I'm a huge fan of Bad Friends. And I just, can I please take a photo? So I got some of that.
Love that guy. Yeah, yeah.
I love that guy. Louis Tan? Yeah, yeah.
Look, look, look. Yeah, put images.
There he is, dude. Oh, wow.
That guy's so fucking handsome. This dude right here, dude.
Oh, my God. Holy shit.
This dude right here, dude. Hugged the shit out of my body, dude.
Hey, hey, hey. Take it away.
I'm going to cum. Hey, hey, hey.
Good God. I'm going to cum cum.
I'm yeah yeah i'm gonna take it away i'm gonna come on look at him that dude right there dude oh my god he's gorgeous this guy this guy's great pissing me off and he he gets it this guy gets it what pussy yeah he gets a lot of it he gets a lot of pussy but he also his body his body is very good what do you eat what do you fucking eat fucking eat, Louis Tan? Dude, Louis Tan? He eats pussy, for sure. For sure.
Yeah, that's for sure. Yeah.
Appetizer and fucking dessert. I don't know what he gets for his entree, but.
Like, how do you get a stomach that looks like that? I don't know. But he's also smell and texture, dude.
It's about the smell and texture texture he smells good and he feels good yeah the

texture of his jacket he was wearing one of those like hot guy jacket hot jacket yeah i don't even know where to get it man's store we don't get those stores we can't even get it you know it's like you know what i mean hot guy stores t-rex leather oh how do you get t-rex leather you know what i mean like that's even that's not around he gets it he went he has a time machine went back killed a T-Rex with his hands.

You know what I mean?

He, yeah, yeah.

Skinned it.

Skinned it, right?

Right. You know what I mean? Like, that's not around.
He gets it. He has a time machine.
Went back. Killed a T-Rex with his hands.
You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Skinned it.
Right? Dried it out. You know what I mean? Anyway, so.
And the smell. Where do you smell? Is that big dick energy smell? What is that? It's a smell of like oaky.
I bet you. Fruity.
He doesn't even have cologne. He probably just smells that good.
Dude, so good, dude. Some guys just smell good.
And And would I Ask me if I would suck his Some people smell bad Ask me if I Yeah Well that's the people But am I Put that up But I Ask me if I'd suck his Would you suck his Nah Look at me Nah Look at me liar Look at me liar Don't wait man Okay Look at me in the eyes when you- Dude, I'm a fan. Okay, dude.
Anyway, this guy was cool. And there was a lot of those.
There was another, the guy that, he's like the showrunner for Dexter. That show's so good.
And he goes, yeah, I'm a big, well, I love what you and Andrew are doing. Yeah, so people, they're out there.
They're out there. But then, but the most of them are like, what is he doing here? Fuck those people.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. They can go fuck, you know what they're not? What? They're not Shaka, dog.
They're not. That's what I knew.
I didn't know the word, but that's not, they don't have the Shaka go. No Shaka.
Talk to me about Hawaii. What'd you do? Shaka.
Shaka, Shaka, Shaka. Stop, stop, stop.
I love Hawaii. Give me the, give me the positive.
But can I be honest about Hawaii? Negative seven.. Hawaiians.
Am I crazy? You've been to Hawaii enough. Do Hawaiians kind of- Hate white people.
Yeah, there it is. Okay, thank you so much.
That's what I was just going to say. Haole, dude.
Haole. Yeah, yeah.
When I come down the road, they go, oh. I thought it was Toto, that girl from the movie.
No, they don't really have the same sense of humor. Do you understand? Yeah.
Do you know what I mean? Like every time I try to make jokes with locals. It's a different kind of sense of humor, yeah.
Seriously, because we went to a restaurant and I was like, hi, we'd like to check in for bowling. Yeah, yeah.
And the woman was like, there is no bowling. Oh, right, right.
And I was like We're just having dinner Can I just say something? And of course Can I just say something? What? Not that funny Yeah yeah Not that funny? It was just a slight I don't know I'm at the Let go It's small I'm the hostess Alo, shaka. Shaka.
Shaka aloha. Aloha.
Mahalo. Mahalo, mahalo.
Hi, we're here for the AIDS benefit. That's funny.
Okay, see. That's funny.
All right. That's funny.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but it was just a small throwaway, but I feel like a lot of people, they hate us.
Yeah. They hate us.
They hate you. Not me.
But I'm not a regular wife. I know.
I know you're not. And I own is a regular i'm invited to the meetings thank you please yeah yeah yeah it's in paella in maui i go every year wow right right it's a it's at what you know the road to hana it's the first mountain on the top we have a beautiful right and there's a crane bird there it's beautiful anyway um do you eat it no no no it's just there right and i'll tell them but um because i'm asian yeah you have a pass yeah i for some reason i never get shit and i love it yeah that's why i go there so much hawaii i know yeah and it's like um when i was uh on when i used to do magnum like people used to come right to the set and go, who's local to the like people, the cameraman and all these people.
I'm like, what the fuck? You guys, all the locals should be working on the show. Like people would like literally come and protest in that way, right? And we're like, you know, we're like any colonized place.
It's like we won. Right mean you guys were the kings of it you know what i mean you guys died in france you got driven out now in italy now in vietnam you got driven out right no you're not french he's spanish yeah spanish what did they take spanish took the philippines you were driven out well they took everywhere i mean they're pretty actually we were kicked out of everything they conquered like everything yeah i'm not saying That's a good behavior It's bad behavior No it's really bad It's really bad What you guys did Was really bad Look at that Argentina Are you guys mad At the Spanish You're Filipino I'm kind of in the middle But there's some people In the Philippines That hate Like Koreans Fancy Oh and we hate Koreans We hate Koreans Koreans.
No, because Koreans hate on us too. Yeah.
No, we don't. We just look down on you.
Every time I go to Koreatown, I feel so little. No, not in Koreatown, but in the Philippines, I've seen them.
Yeah. And can I say, they're not my Koreans.
When I look at those Koreans, I go, what are you being cocky about? Look at you. You're the ones that got kicked out of Korea.
You're fat, more yellow than most. I don't like it.
Right? They don't have the skill set. You're not Sai.
You're not Sai. They don't have Sai.
They can't direct films. Unless you're Gagnon style.
Yeah, yeah. Chill out.
Yeah, you have to. Or Kim Jong-un.
Number one. He's the number one.
So I shockered my way through the island. I went on a five-mile hike.
Loved it. Into a ravine.
What's really weird is, I mean, this is public knowledge. What's a ravine? A ravine is like a big, huge valley.
And water used to run through it. We were on the island of Lanai.
Do you know Lanai? Yeah. I mean, the way you're talking to right now, it's a little talking down.
No, I don't know. We're on the island of Lanai.
You know Lanai? It's like, relax, dude, Howley. Do you know it? I do know Lanai.
Have you been? Have we been on Lanai? No. Then no.
Go ahead. Larry Ellison bought it a couple years ago.
And it's really weird. That's the guy.
I asked every local. Because, you know, there were some fans there, which was nice.
People would be like, yo, we're a big guy. And I was like, oh, thank you.
That's great. And then so I would talk to the locals and befriend them.
And everyone, I was like, be honest. Do you like it or do you hate it? That Larry.
You know what I mean? Because this fucking rich white guy buys the island. And all of and all of them were the same they were like no it's pretty he's done some good shit like he's he's keeping it he's keeping it legit he hasn't fucked with the locals you know what i mean like he's doing the thing to like not get in their way but i could tell there's a little undercurrent where they're like but if he fucks up we'll kill him they're not gonna do nothing i don't know dude you're on their island yeah you're right 3 000 people it's small it's beautiful you were there the that's the only island you were at yeah where else would i want to go what were you doing there vacation lady what the fuck what the fuck oh shaka dude dude shaka dog dude um yeah i went hiking but the best part is because i stayed in the mountains.
So it was like a different. It wasn't like Hawaii.
It wasn't like a beach. I wasn't at a fucking beach resort.
No, I saw the room. That's nice.
It was so nice. And they had little onsens, little Japanese onsens in the forest.
You could go sit. Is it incense you're trying to say? Onsen.
Oh, onsen. Onsen.
Oh, okay. Anyang? Haseyo.
Haseyo. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And there was little like hot tub onsens in the middle of the fucking forest. You were surrounded by it.
It was incredible. Honestly, but there's signs out there that say, because it's an adult only resort.
No children. And there's signs everywhere that says, no alcohol and no bodily fluids.
Oh, I'm out. No fucking.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, you can't fuck.
You can't fuck in the onsen. You can't.
Oh, you can't. But you can fuck a lot of.
Everywhere else. Yeah.
You can fuck everywhere. Do you fuck outside or no? Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah. Inside, outside, upside down, on the roof, in the lobby, in the front lobby.
Yeah. We were checking in.
Wait, is that the island where, remember the monk? Was that not a monk? It was Dalai Lama. It's, there's seven, is that vortex or? Energy vortex.
Energy vortexes. In Hawaii there is one, but then you can't get near it.
What do you mean? You'll die? No, there's like people guarding it, so you can't go to the energy vortex. Whoa, I want to go.
Yeah, there we go. They all are.
How many is there? Do I have it wrong? how many vortexes are there? what does that say? world map of major what? there's like seven major ones Shaka yeah yeah yeah but it's like I don't we have to you and I dude yeah we all have to go to a vortex dude i would love to yeah i don't know what

happens there but there's like the dalai lama goes and he gets some shit out of it maybe that's

what he's like stuck on my tongue i don't know but maybe you know but like we i i we went we when

me and colina were still dating we went drove by one when we tried to get to it and they wouldn't

let us even near it why they? They guard it. So this.

I think the FBI guards it.

Whoa.

The feds.

Okay.

So where is the, where is the closest one that we can get to?

Yeah.

The closest vortex near me.

Yeah.

Just go to your maps, Google maps and see what happens.

Yelp.

Yelp.

Vortex in there.

See what happens.

You go to Yelp and people are just leaving reviews.

They're like, this vortex was.

The energy was not as good as I thought. And they know an Indonesian one's way better yeah yeah cathedral rock sedona wow we got to go to sedona arizona cathedral rock each their own particular energy each rating in its own energy i want to know what happens dude i bet you get enlightened you must feel physically something you think yeah i don't

even know what a vortex is to be honest with you like let me define vortex center of the thing can you define vortex um it's where gravity pulls you in and then it spits gravity back out Very good

What is it?

That's really good

A vortex is believed to be a special spot on earth

Where at and then it spits gravity back out. Very good.
That's really good. A vortex is believed to be a special spot on Earth where, believed to be, I don't like that confidence.
Yeah, it's gotta be. We think.
You know what I mean? Where energy is either entering into the Earth or projecting out of the Earth's plane. That's what she just said.
You had the right, college is working, huh? Yeah. Can vortex energy help you? Some say the vortex energy in Sedona is so powerful you can actually feel it.
Help you take giant leaps with your spiritual development. We can get closer to God.
Wow. I knew that about vortexes.
The Native Americans believe that spiritual transformation can occur more quickly and easily in Sedona because the veils to other dimensions are thinner there. Wow.
Why are you closing your eyes and shaking your head, Carlos? You don't like thin veils? No, I just think the Native Americans probably didn't know much about science and math and stuff. Okay, here we go.
Here we go. Here we go.
They didn't have calculators. What are you talking about? They invented the TI-83 we all use.
Native Americans made that. that was cherokee i'm sorry yeah yeah yeah i forgot i want to take shrooms and go to the vortex you want to take shrooms and go to the vortex yeah that's we'll take a trip to sedona i was gonna send uh photos of the of my shaka trip but it was fucking amazing man yeah i didn't see any shakas and uh more photos either and um and then i and then i rented a jeep and we went off-roading and it got a little sketchy i'm not gonna lie there was a part of it where we're like careening down this fucking because it's there it's no roads on the side of those mountains yeah and we're just like slamming down the thing and the the jeep is going like and you're the you're driving oh yeah dude what's your wife doing freaking freaking the fuck out yeah hating every second of it she hate fucking hated it wow we were like we'll go down to shipwreck shipwreck beach and we go down to shipwreck beach getting up was insane what was it was there wreckage there was a shipwreck at shipwreck beach yeah you saw it oh yeah no well just describe that i've never been to see a shipwreck Beach.
Yeah, you saw it? Oh, yeah. Well, just describe that.
I've never been to a shipwreck. Boat in water.
That's all it was. Oh.
Literally, that's there. That's there at Shipwreck Beach.
That's insane. Off the coast, yeah.
That's incredible. Fucking wild.
So, zoom in. Can you go in there? No, but they do boat tours around it.
And I think divers dive around there, too. And how old that? It doesn't seem like an old ship maybe in the World War II.
I don't know how. It's probably crashed.
Is it Germany? Or what? It's like 200 years ago. Is that what it said? 1980.
Oh. Well, we'll just remove it then.
Historic. No, it's so big.
It's not historic. It'll give us a shit.

It was like an old pirate ship.

You know what I mean?

They go, ah, mighty.

Well, let's just pretend that it is.

Okay.

Honestly, it's a beautiful little tiny island,

like a cool little rad getaway,

and you got to take one of those little scary planes

to get there, you know, the little like.

Wow.

The ones where the whole time you're like,

please don't crash.

Yeah, yeah. Dude, let's buy an island an island no what do we want to do with it look how big that island is 60 million dollars for one island yeah what the fuck we don't have 60 million but no one will be there we'll get a starbucks and a coffee bean let's start a go fund me right now for to buy an island yeah yeah yeah is there one okay bad friends one? Okay.
Bad Friends Island. Yeah, bad, round, okay.
So Round Island, Nova Scotia is 58 million. No, 58,000.
58,000, I mean, for 2.7 acres. That's nothing.
That's nothing. Wow.
Okay, let's buy it. No, forget it.
Buy one in the Philippines. Yeah, there are beautiful islands there.
What were you say oh i watched uh i watched ghostbusters on the plane the frozen empire yeah i auditioned for that you did yeah like some hunter guy hunter yeah what hunter i don't know there was a scene i remember there was a scene where i don't remember but you could have been a ghost the ghosts on this one looked weird like the green one like what yeah there was a couple of ghosts really

you could have played a ghost easily

was it a movie good

yeah it was fun

it's fun to see Slimer

good to throw back to Slimer

yeah

Bill Murray and all that

Dan Ackroyd was in it

no Harold Ramis

sadly

sadly yeah

sadly

but

you highly recommend

and Mr. Paul Rudd

led the movie

wow

that's fun

cute guy

did you ever see the original Ghostbusters

no

how about

let's go with the

like the classics

of those types of movies

Thank you. Led the movie.
Wow. That's fun.
Cute guy. Did you ever see the original Ghostbusters? No.

Let's go with the classics of those types of movies.

No Ghostbusters.

Goonies.

I've seen...

Yeah, I've seen Goonies.

In the graveyard cemetery.

At Synespia.

Oh, you saw it there.

Yeah.

Hey, you guys.

You remember that? Yeah. Yeah.
And then what else? Who does that look like? Me? No. Yeah.
It sure does. You ever see Gremlins? No.
Is that a classic? Yeah. I mean, but that's so old.
Yeah. Oh, fuck.
I can't believe this. I was going to talk.
Sorry. Sorry so sorry oh it made me so mad dude you okay no i'm not it made me so i just remember i don't know why that just brought this up what but i'm gonna tell you dude i got a haircut but can we see it no it's right here but so check it out and i i who did i call mccone i So I called you, right? Yeah.
This is a fact. I met Rudy's.
Ruby's. Rudy's? Rudy's.
Floyd's. I was at Floyd's.
Yeah. Well, come on.
You're not shocking anymore, dude. You're like, hurry up.
I like to melt in it, you know? Slow. Shocking.
Good. Keep going.
So you're at Rudy's, man. Right.
And I'm just like, so I'm on my phone and I'm like, I think I'm on Instagram, whatever, and scrolling. And there was like a little scene of Timothee Chalamet.
Love. I love him.
Great talented guy. In the new Bob Dylan movie.
And he was singing. I was like, dude, that's pretty good.
Yeah. I might watch it.
So I turned to Barbara, I go, dude, this Bob Dylan movie, he's like, who? You got Bob Dylan? He's like, I go Bob Dylan he's like no what how old is this gentleman in his 20s and he told me I could even say his name is Ray he even said I could say his name because I said I was going to talk about it so then I go wait wait dude Ray are you you know you know what I want to say are you are you Batman yeah yeah and he goes no, I'd never heard of him. I go, all right, hold on.
Fucking the barber next to him. So, dude, Ray doesn't know who Bob Dylan is.
She goes, oh, I like his paintings. And I go.
No way. Yeah, I swear to God.
And I go. You never get any hair cut there again.
Oh, no, that's Bob Ross, she says. Right? I stood up, went around the whole

barbershop. No one knew

who he was. No way.
Yeah. And in

my mind, then I call McCone and I go,

I'm sorry, dude, you're a part of this generation. I go,

do you please tell me, you know

who Bob Dylan is? Do you know who Bob Dylan is?

No. See? That's

what I'm saying. And it's a

travesty. Did you get the Bob Dylan

haircut?

Hey, don't get mad. Shaka shaka.
Shaka shaka. He looks so much like Bob Dylan.
Yeah, yeah. So, you don't know who he is.
What's a popular song? Oh my god. Like a Rolling Stone.
Like a Rolling Stone. Okay.
I in the wind. Yeah.
I'm trying to think of what she would know. What rapper has used a Bob Dylan song and remade it? Hey, Mr.
Tambourine Man, play a song for me. No.
But he didn't write that. It was a cover, I think.
No, he wrote that, but people covered his. Oh, people covered that.
Yeah, yeah. The man in me will do.
You know that? Yeah. Almost.
I want you. That song.
I want you. Yeah.
That's a great song. Anyway, Bob Dylan, it just in terms of the people that are living on planet Earth.
Right. That like, you know, I mean, have like cognitive reasoning, you know, I mean, and eyeballs.
Right. Eyeballs.
We he is like the Beatles as big and the rolling stones in the sense of the impact musically he's a huge figure of the late 60s you know i mean he's just a a musical icon that like it's like a sinatra like i'm not i might not be a sinatra fan but i i'm well aware of who he is it's he's that type character. And no one in your generation knows,

except for McCone,

knows who the fuck he is.

And maybe I'm like,

get off my lawn.

I think I'm that old now.

I'm not.

So McCone,

I called him to see if I was the old man going,

you know what I mean?

All the kids of this generation

and complaining.

I'm seeing him on Wednesday at the bowl.

He's alive?

Yeah.

But I mean, is that shocking to you? Bob Dylan? Yeah. Sadly.
Uh-oh. I get that he hasn't been as popular through culture through time.
The Beatles will... You know who the Beatles are? Like the Beatles...
It's just some things kept up their culture. Yeah, yeah.
Kept up in culture. Bob Dylan probably didn't.
Yeah, I've never heard anything. Yeah, this makes sense.
Really? It oddly makes sense to me. Because you don't see him again on stuff.
He's not like on a fucking Pepsi commercial. Except for the fact that Timothee Chalamet is playing him in his own movie? No, I agree.
I'm saying I get why young people don't see him because he's not in culture. The Beatles are still in culture.
You think this is going to help? I think it's going to help. Yeah, yeah.
And then Ed Norton Jr. plays, what's his name, the country guy? What's his name? He was so good.
I forget his name. The trailer was good.
It looks so good. It looks so good.
Does he sing? Timothy Shepard? Yeah. Wow.
And that was like, it's his voice, right? I think so. I think it's his voice.
I was like, whoa, this guy's talented. It makes me mad when people are that talented.
I know, me too. Well, we don't have any of that.
Austin Butler. Let's try to sing.
Roll, roll, roll, roll, roll your boat. Gently downstream.
Down the street. Street? Stream? Why would the boat be on the fucking street? It's got wheels on it, this boat.
Oh, it does? It's going to the beach. The wheels on the boat on the boat go round and round round and run i know you know i know this here's what i know do yeah no no dude no dude no let's start over dude okay do d D...
Dody? Dody? Dody? Isn't that an old... That's not a song!

Korean song? No, let's start over, dude. Okay.
Doe. Doe.
Doe. Doe.
Doe. Doe.
No. Isn't that not an old.
That's not a song. Indian song.
No. No, no, no, no.
Sorry. Go ahead.
Doe. A deer.
Yeah, that's it. I was going to get that.
That's all I know. No.
Doe. A deer.
A female deer. Ray.
A golden. Golden.
Drop. A drop of golden sun.
Me, a name I call myself.

Fa, a long, long way to run.

I like that they did fa instead of far.

That's great.

Fa.

Yeah, it's like, you know, manipulating the word.

Yeah, fa.

Fa.

A long, long way to run.

It's a Boston way of saying fa.

Fa.

Yeah.

Over there, it's fa over there.

Yeah, yeah.

A long, long way to run.

And then I know from that movie,

Edo Weiss, Edo Weiss. You know that was Hitler's favorite song? It's a banger And then The hills are alive The hills are alive With the sound of Music? Yeah It's a great I've talked about the play i was in right what play you don't know you don't know no i have never told the story on this fucking podcast oh it's a big it's a big story for me let's hear it all right so um i never knew i was funny okay jack i did right and um so in my freshman year of high school, I think it was eighth grade.
Eighth grade, I auditioned for a play and beat me out of the play. Fuck.
Right? And then three days before they're actually putting it up, just bailed. So I played Kurt from The Sound of Music, one of the kids.
No way. Yeah, yeah.
You did? Yeah. So there's a scene where Fraulein Maria is, you know what I mean? And the place was packed.
It's packed. 80 people.
Slammed. Like 150.
Okay. Right? To a kid.
That's good. You're nervous.
Let me see Kurt from The Sound of. Right.
So this scene where like, there's Kurt. That's who I'm playing.
That's fucking me. I know.
But that's what I'm playing. You played me? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so Fraleigh Maria is meeting the kids for the first time. And Mr.
Von Trapp, I think that's his name, whatever his name is, right? Yeah. He's calling his kids down, right? And the kids come down the staircase in order right as soon as the audience sees me the place goes pandemonium laugh it's like i i literally remember this going people going and my dad was there and my dad was like looking around like what the fuck is going on right and it was the at first it was first, it was like, uh-oh.
Yeah. You know what I mean? What's so funny? I'm listening.
Like, I was like, uh-oh, this is shameful, right? But then I'm like, no, I like this. Was it the, were you the only Asian kid? Was all white kids and you? Dude, the Fondtrap families are, yeah.
Yeah, so that's why they're laughing. That's insane.
I know. Like one little fat Asian kid comes in.
I know, It's funny though. Think about it, right? And so then I have one line.
I'm Kurt. I'm 13.
Whatever the line is, right? Yeah. As soon as I step forward, because we're in a line, the place goes, right, right.
And then I was just like, I was like hamming it up. And I did this with my hands.
Right? And then I remember afterwards, I went up to the director. I think they were like, he was like, oh, I'm so sorry that they were laughing.
I go, no, no, no. Can I change the lines? He goes, I don't know.
I go, yeah, I think it'd be cool if we justify it. So if I go, I'm Kurt, I'm 13.
I was adopted. Or I'm Kurt, I'm 13.
I play it on the sun longer than anybody else. Or like something that would ground me into the thing, right? Play with it.
And he said no and so every night we did that play i got a huge laugh did you change the lines no the director director did not have good and then the same thing happened when i played huckleberry finn you didn't play i sort of got it's on my instagram one of my first earliest um posts i played huckleberry fan oh my god but it's like those are the first times I got laughs from a crowd.

And I think that that stayed with me.

You know what I mean?

And I know they're laughing at me.

No,

they're laughing with you.

They're laughing together.

Yeah,

that's right.

Because it at you is like mocking,

but you,

you're being funny.

I think I was doing it.

Like I knew.

Oh yeah.

Maybe instinctively.

So I,

I walked down in a funny way.

Yeah. You ham it up.

Yeah.

I ham it up.

You do that now.

I do that now.

And I went like this. I knew I was going to get a laugh.
And I think I was addicted to that. Yeah, it's a crap.
Did you do any plays? I didn't. I did in college.
I'm dead serious. I did the vagina monologues.
No, you didn't. I swear to God.
No, you didn't. I swear to God.
How? Because it's all women. And they needed a guy for one of the, for the abusive husband.
Oh, I play the abusive husband yeah and i hated it because i was an asshole the whole time yeah and there's nothing redeeming and you're supposed to hate the character and the the woman that put the teacher that put it together professor was like you could you could maybe act for real for real wow i was like really and she's like yeah And she's like, yeah. And she's like, do you want to sign up for anything else? And I said, no.
Oh, you're done. I just was.
But how did you get the bug then? To act? Yeah. If you only did vagina monologues in college, that gave you the bug? I think.
How'd you know you could do it? Well, I didn't know.-up gave me the fucking- Then when I started, when I moved out here and I started doing sketches, I realized that I was, I got it. Oh, I see.
I understood that I was- I did improv in high school, so I kind of knew what it was, you know what I mean? And it was fun. Did you ever do improv in high school? Did you do a play? I did, but it got canceled because of COVID.
Thanks a lot, COVID. Thanks, China.
Thanks a lot, China. What are you guys fucking doing? Did you find a picture for Bob? Oh.
Did you find it? I want to see this photo. It's all just girls.
Huckleberry Finn did. Sydney.
Oh, cute. That's me as Huckleberry Finn.
What a cute little boy. Yeah.
So I did it young. God, you were cute.

Yeah, I performed.

That's how you got the phone.

So you were a thespian.

That's the word.

Take off your beanie.

I want to see your hair.

I want to see your new haircut.

I'm not going to go there again.

No, it looks good.

I think it actually looks,

the shape is nice.

You like it?

It's good.

You look like old school you. I think I do too.
That's how he looked years ago. Back in the day, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I think you actually looks The shape is nice Do you like it? It's good You look like old school you I think I did too That's how he looked years ago Back in the day Yeah yeah yeah I think you're right You did I think you're fucking Absolutely right dude Let me look at a photo real quick Hold on let me look Reverse it Oh it looks pretty good Yeah it looks really good Yeah Oh I didn't tell you this Fuck I forgot to tell you this Yes So we went to nobu for lunch right and so they go i'm like i go i didn't because i guess people ordered things an hour before so it would be ready who did production yeah like all the actors and stuff they you know what i mean okay and i never got the note so when i showed up at nobu i was like wait, wait, you guys already ordered? Yeah, because, you know, we got to go.

I'm going to order.

You know how to freak out?

So I ordered like 15 things.

But then, like, they had ordered a lot of appetizers.

So I didn't even really need to order.

So I overate.

And at the end, there was like a dessert with a lot of cream in it.

You know me, though, with the lack.

It was a kam kam.

Kam kam. It was kam kam.
Kam kam.

It was kam kam, yeah.

Kam kam.

Yeah, and you know me with lactose, right?

And so I'm doing an interview with...

Did you have Imodium with you?

No.

You didn't bring it?

No.

And ask Emi.

I sat down in the middle of a thing and is looking at me from behind the cameras.

And she looks at me and she goes, are you okay?

And I'm like... And she goes, are you okay? And I'm like, I don't know.
And she goes, what? Can you wait five minutes? I don't know, it's all dry. And then they would ask me a question.
I was like, and I was so weird because I was clenching. You were pinching and clenching.
I was clenching. And it's like one of those huge, I don't know what the fuck it was, like a Fandora.
It was like a huge thing. Pinch right now.
Let me try to be an interviewer. Bob, this is a great movie for you.
Excited to be in Borderlands? It's an exhilarating experience. The movie, this is literally what I said.
The movie is an exhilarating experience with a punch, with fun act. It was a great cast.
Like it literally, I was saying that because I was clenching so hard. And I'm with Janina.
And you know who Ben Davis is? Do you ever play Red Dead Yeah He played Dutch Oh right on And it's literally It's literally him Put Dutch in Red Dead Redemption That he plays him So I'm there with Janina and him And I just stood up and ran out In the middle of a question it was so fucking embarrassing what are you working on next yeah a turd yeah i'm working on yeah yeah she told me that she's i was like how's it going she's like good did she really say that she was other than bobby having to shit in the middle of an interview yeah Yeah, it was embarrassing. No, she said it was fun.
They loved it. They laughed.
I know they laugh when it happens, but the thing is that I don't think it's funny. Well, what's a lesson learned? Bring Imodium.
That's right. You got to bring it.
Yeah, every time. Because we find ourselves in this situation.
We always eat dessert. That's right.
And we always eat cream. That's right.
You and I love cream. I'm a cream guy.
We're cream boys. Yeah, yeah.
Any form. Any form of cream I like.
Fill me up with cream. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So. Yeah.
We kind of have. And you know whose job that is to have a modium? These guys at all times.
Do you have them on you? You got to keep that thing on you, dog. Yeah, your thing.
You got to stay strapped up with that modium. You understand? Yeah, we'll get some.
Thank you. Strap it up, dog.
Stay strapped stay strapped up dog yeah so um what's going on in your little world yeah i've been surfing surfing huh interesting yeah chaka chaka dude chaka how's it going you good i'm so bad yeah it's so hard have you ever tried to surf oh my god are you crazy yeah it's impossible so hard i've never been out there it's so i'm paddling and i I'm still on the beach. Like for an hour you're paddling and your feet are still on the beach.
Just in the sand. Yeah, yeah.
Can you get out there? No. And then once you get out there, I think one time it's like the timing.
Yeah. And you're exhausted.
Yeah, and you have to sit and wait and sit and wait and then try, fail. Sit and wait, sit and wait, try, fail.
Why is it fun? I don't know. It's kind of like, and people always say if you keep at it, like like skiing you know when you ski and you fall a bunch and you first ski and then you're like once you click you go I get it I got it good.
I can ski like a motherfucker. Never happened oh damn was that Black Bobby? Yeah I can ski like a motherfucker.
There go Black Bobby. The first time doll I was up on slopes too.
Okay player. But surfing's different.
It's impossible. It's impossible.
Impossible. I thought of you I went to cat sanctuary in Hawaii.
Oh, yeah, tell me. And the girl working there was very cute.
She's like, there's like 400 cats. And she was like, this section is for like young, spry, fun, like goofy cats that like to play.
And this one, this cage is filled with our geriatric, disabled, and special needs cats. Where do you think i hung out yeah that one right there for sure i couldn't wait to get in i was like how bad were they amazing dude yeah was it like i know it's like it's the cat version of comic-con i was like catacomb yeah catacomb dude it was the cutest shit the old the old fucking cat there was one the cat this one cat i'm not kidding yeah he looked like an 80 year old man oh wow he looked like an old withered man yeah and i had little you know they give you a bag of food yeah and i go to like give him some food and i'm not exaggerating i'm not kidding he he like looks at it yeah and he points down at the ground no he's not gonna eat it from my hand i swear to god i put it on the ground he looks up and he looks back and then goes and eats it whoa like he instructed me yeah old man he's like put it on the fucking ground yeah i'm not gonna take it out of your hand yeah wow it was really fun that's cool what else did you see uh one well one cat there was one cat that had um one leg that's not bad it was really tough to look at why one cat that had one leg.
That's not bad. It was really tough to look at.
Why? One leg. It had one leg.
I've seen it. Can we talk about special needs cats just for a second? 100%.
Yeah. So there are certain things they don't know how to do, like lick their paws or they lick something else? Do they miss? I mean, I'm missing it.

I mean,

what do they do?

You know what I mean?

I mean,

they just have knees.

I know what they do.

I know what they do.

Especially these guys,

right?

They cover the poo first

and then poo.

They don't know the order.

What else do they do right anyway beautiful cats beautiful cats wow and then how many of them were there of the special needs ones maybe like 30 or 40 there was a lot of cats it was hard it was hard because you but I donated we donated a lot of money So it made me feel better about it. Can you bring your own food? That's what I would do.
They give you the scoop of their food. They want the cats.
But the funny thing is, a lot of these cats at these places, they're overfed already. They're fat as fuck.
So you're like, I don't even know if I should give this guy more food. There was one who couldn't even meow.
He morphed. He was like, he was so fucking fat.
He was morphing. He wasn't even me.
I was like, oh my God. And they're probably all clipped, right? Oh yeah.
Yeah. They have to be clipped.
Yeah. But because they're roaming around free outside.
If it wasn't, imagine. Oh yeah.
If I was a cat. Oh my God.
I'd have 10,000 babies. You'd be, you'd be Genghis Khan.
I would even go to that leaving cage area where you were and do them If you're a cat yeah, what do you care? Like I don't think they have like that cats like not licking his paws right I mean, I'm still gonna yeah, I'm still gonna tap that They don't know they don't the same kind of like issues we do as what do you think a cat thinks when it sees another disabled cat? Yeah yeah It doesn't think anything No cats are smart They're thinking Oh yeah sure sure A dog would just be like We're all the same We're all the same We're all the same Now slow that cat Yeah Do what they think You know what I mean? Why can't he get up here? Yeah yeah yeah What's wrong with him? I'm gonna go down there and do it You know I like when cats When they paw each other You know A few of them were kind of getting fight i love that and they want they put their hand up slow and they like show the other cat they're like hey i'm gonna fucking hit you yeah and the other cat's like winces and then they start beating like they yeah they were fighting it was awesome but they show it which i think is cool they're like look look look yeah i'm gonna hit fucking hit you yeah and then they fucking start to smack them yeah them. Here's the thing about cats, what I don't like.
Because, you know, now I'm a single dude living with three cats. So it can be completely quiet for 24 hours.
You're sleeping. Yeah.
And then you hear, like, you hear, like, this abrupt noise, right? And there's something going on. Here's another thing I caught Ming doing.
Are they fighting? Yeah, something. They do things, too, that you go, should I go take him to the...
Because there's something going on. What does she do? So Ming was staring at nothing.
Just like off into space? No, it was just... She was staring at something, but there was nothing there.
Oh. Then your house is haunted.
But then she got scared. Stay shaka.
So this is what she did. She was staring at nothing.
And then she went. And I ran out of the house.
I ran out of the house. You moved.
You put your house for sale. See, they do things like that.
By the way, that's because your house is haunted. What? Your house is 100% haunted.
I could feel it. Whenever I visit your house, the first time I went over to your house, you told me to go downstairs.
I went downstairs. You were like in the room.
That's my dad. Because the box is down there.
Oh, it's downstairs. Yeah, yeah.
Every time I go downstairs, go downstairs It feels Yeah It feels like I can like you can There's almost like a You know it feels like a vortex A vortex yeah And a vortex Do you really feel Now be honest with you I swear I swear I do feel in your house The fuck man Shut the fuck up Really Yes what do you mean I swear I promise Oh no Honestly Have you been to my house? I mean, it's not a light energy.

Dude, that was the most honest you've ever been, dude.

The downstairs.

The upstairs is.

That's what I'm saying.

The downstairs is fucking weird.

Downstairs is not a positive energy.

No, it's not.

You, McCone, you really believe that? Well, yeah, I think the statue at the front kind of scared me too. Oh, it's the statue maybe.
No, the statue's not it. That's not, he's just a pussy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not it.
People don't know, I have a gigantic red statue. Of a guy.
Of a Japanese man bowing. It's huge.
It's probably taller than... You.
Yeah, It's taller than me for sure. Yeah.
Anyway, and I have this gigantic window. And when people come to my, I have this gigantic orange door.
I'm not giving anything away, right? No. And this orange metallic door, right? And there's a gigantic window next to it.
And there's a Japanese, it was solid red bowing. But I do that so that for intruders.
Right. So they get scared away.
It's actually very smart yeah or macones idiots idiots yeah but that downstairs one time i was walking down there i think i was going to like get something out of the garage and um yeah i was helping set up for the party with kalilah and i went down there and it was and i thought i heard someone talk to me. And I turned around and I was like, what?

Oh my God, here we go. And nobody was there.
And then I sat for, you know when you just like stay still for a second because you're like waiting for it to happen again? And like quietly I heard, if you're gay, I kill everybody. And I was like, Bobby's dad? Yeah.
If you're a gay If you're a gay I kill everybody Incredible. I said thank you Mr.
Lee. Yeah.
I'm not gay. Prove it.
Prove it. Prove it.
Sometimes it's fun for us. Yeah some kind of comic comic goes some Asian guy goes I love when you guys do Asian accents and I go oh cool but then some white guys sometimes go I don't like it yeah I get it yeah but I like it it's how we have fun we have fun with it we're kids we're children we're kids we're big dumb kids and you're also a dumb kid thank you yeah i just want to ask you to bobby something okay here we go what's up it's like disturbing me okay go ahead all right is it because you're at my house no like what i'm seeing right now what what's that thing on your eye what thing what thing oh there like a cut by your eye.
Oh, dude. Oh, I can tell you what it is.
Last night. Last night, dude.
Someone said it on your face? No, it was fucking ridiculous. What? So this guy named John, I forget his last name, but he was in, he's one of those really funny actors, but he also did a show called inside job on netflix with him you're like this older like old school comedian guy he's a big guy too okay you know and he was completely drunk and he was like he was on the street going free back free back me me me like singing i don't know what he was singing dude but.
But he was like, I gotta go to country, bro.

You know what I mean?

He was like,

free back, free back.

You know what I mean?

And I was like,

I go, you're not,

I go, you're not going no free.

I don't know what I said, right?

I don't even like,

because he's drunk,

so you can say whatever, right?

You don't know,

I don't know about free back.

You know what I mean?

I don't know what he was singing.

And then like,

so I started doing that.

I thought, free back, free back.

Right?

And then he kind of lunged

and like tried to choke me.

What?

He tried to choke

and his glasses fell

So, So I started doing that. I said, free back, free back, right? And then he kind of lunged and like tried to choke me.
What? Yeah. He tried to choke and his glasses fell and then one of his thumbs went into my fucking eye.
What? It's like two in the morning. You forgot to tell this story? What the fuck? Yeah, I forgot.
And I go, free back, free. And I go, what the fuck? And all the other voices, all these old school voiceover actors, like right there in this middle of the street.
Did he feel bad or he was laughing? He was laughing hey lee you know because all those older guys too call me lee for some reason oh yeah i go lead i cut you yeah i go yeah man i'm gonna go to my room yeah but that was exactly what happened he's so talented and funny that guy god he does all the voices for all those people yeah dude he is so gifted he does everything he does jake yeah he does all those people he's so good. He does everything.
He does Jake. Yeah.
He does all those people. He's so good, that guy.
Maybe he was practicing for a role. But when he's drunk, stay away because he'll try to choke you.
And I don't know what song that was. It was like he was doing something.
It was very funny because I saw him from across the street. Sing it again.
And he was also doing this. And he was so drunk.
What? Yeah, he's like, I think he had liquor in his hand. He's likeback, freeback Me Me, me I got none You know what I mean? Oh I don't know what it was He was improvising a song That's a Bob Dylan song Oh yeah, maybe Bob Dylan Does that one sound familiar? Yeah Now do you know who it is? Freeback, freeback Cut me Yeah He did cut me He cut me I can't believe he cut you on your fucking eye Let me see, look at me for a second

What'd you get at 7-Eleven?

I was looking for Epsom salt and they didn't have any

You wanted to have a soak?

Yeah

How come they don't have Epsom salt at 7-Eleven?

Because crackheads probably use them

They're probably smoking

I love Epsom salt

They don't sell salts anymore

You love a good bath?

A little bath?

Dude, I love bath bombs

And I love soaps

And I love Epsom salt a lot

Thank you. epsom salt they don't sell salts anymore bath salt yeah you love a good bath a little bath dude i love bombs i love bath bombs and i love soaps and i love epsom salt a lot i'll say this you'll never you'll never do this but you could do an only fans of just you in a tub talking in a tub and it would make unbelievable money because in my mind i know what i look like in a tub because i'm big so it's hard for me to take bath but you you think i can lay down flat in the tub yep i can't yes you can there's some bending yes you can my little gumdrop you fit right in there yeah i i can do okay by the way you could hide in a tub in a game of hide and seek with you and i you can hide in a tub i wouldn't see okay go on move on do you think if i do a vlog you vlog from the tub yeah people would pay for that people also want me to vlog me starting a new farm on stardew valley too so people want to see it but i don't want to do that maybe i think you should i do love baths i do love taking a nice beautiful yeah and also white dudes always go it's always white dude they're like why are you taking a bath that you're like sleeping you're like laying in your own filth but wait what he did well i don't know how white people take baths but this is how i take a bath i don't plug it up in the beginning i sit you know sitting sitting the way you know the natives used to sit native style yeah yeah don't you put your legs over the side of the tub and you let the water rush on your pussy, though?

Don't you like that? Yeah, I do that, too.

Yeah, yeah.

But I sit that way and then I don't clog up the tub and I do a pre-wash first.

Pre-wash.

Scrub, wash, anus, penis, the whole thing.

Rinse all that.

And then I plug and then I do the bath.

So you're not bathing in your own filth.

Right.

I mean, it's just an easy thing. And then I then i do two i do that then i go to the shower you shower after the bath oh yeah that's insane yeah yeah what did i do the major i do my leg work and my back work in the shower what do you mean you're working out no cleaning what do you mean leg work and back dude i fuck you're so dumb dude i love you but the the cloth? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right. I lay the cloth down.
I put two different body washes on it. Right? Because I like mixing up.
How long is it for you to take a shower? 40 minutes? 50 minutes? Bath, shower, probably 45 minutes. Jesus Christ.
Okay. No wonder you're fucking late all the time.
It's a ritual. It is a ritual.
So what I do is I, you know what I mean? Then I put two squirts. You know, I have a lot of body wash, right? Yeah.
Tell everyone. Like how many bottles? Like 10? Yeah, yeah, 10 bottles.
What? I mix them. I mix the smells, man.
You like different smells? Yeah. Okay.
Why not? Right? And then I grind into a lather. Back work.
Right, back work. Leg work.
Back work. Back work, right? And then I rinse and I rinse and I rinse.
Then I do thigh work. And then I do, then I sometimes will go after the third time, go back to the bathtub and do specific feet work.
So this is a whole day. Yeah, it's a whole thing.
And I do it every night. Wow.
And you know what? I'm sure I used probably 10 times the amount of water. I always feel like I'm going to get out, like somebody's going to show up at my house and go, it's enough, dude.
They will send you a note. One time we sprung a leak in the backyard when we were out of town.
Yeah. LADWP was like, you're using an absurd amount of fucking water.
How do they know? Because the meter, they track your meter. They know.
Oh, they do? They were like, you're using a comical amount of water. Wow.
I was like, what's going on? But I don't do any for my lawn.

You don't have a lawn.

I know.

That's why.

It's great.

Don't have a lawn.

I have fake grass.

Yeah.

Yeah.

There's no real grass there.

No. Yeah.

You wouldn't need it.

Yeah.

Sign off, Rudy.