Zac Efron & John Cena Make Bobby Cry

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Speaker 2 Hey, we got new merch. We got these t-shirts.
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Hey, everybody. Ricky Sinegi is out right now.
It's me.

Speaker 2 It's just me, actually. The other guys that are in it, I don't know if they're important, but it is John Cena, Zach Efron, and Jermaine Fowler amongst a cast of other funny people.
Great movie.

Speaker 2 Watch it on Amazon Prime video. Watch it on Prime video, Ricky Cinicky, available right now.
You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

Speaker 2 White dude and an Asian dude.

Speaker 2 You two are disgusting.

Speaker 2 You two or something. We're bad friends.
Hey, guys, quiet, please. We're doing a show.

Speaker 2 Bobby likes to yell. I like this yell.
I'm so sorry. You guys publish this, but I want you to introduce our guests the proper way.
What? Yeah, so so you guys, you guys split, split.

Speaker 2 There's only two and two. We have Zach Afron, John Cena, Jermaine Fowler, Andrew Santino, and they're in a new movie called Rick Smiles.
Ricky Smiles is our new movie.

Speaker 2 He does smile a lot in the movie, and I'm telling you right now, I heard it's a banger, dude.

Speaker 2 Tell the boys everything you know about Ricky Smiles. What I know about the Ricky Smiles is that he smiles a lot in the movie, and dude, it's like, you know,

Speaker 2 remember the movie Smile? I do. I've seen it.

Speaker 2 You know, my friends are in it. Yeah.
Yeah. We're in a movie called Ricky Stinicky.
That's called Ricky Smiley.

Speaker 2 Ricky Smiles. The black valve.
Ricky Sninicky. Sninicky.
So do another introduction. Yeah.
Welcome to the Bad Friends podcast. We have two, three, very, five, four,

Speaker 2 very big

Speaker 2 actors and stuff. Thanks, buddy.
Sorry. Thanks.
Yeah, I mean, he's bigger. Hurry up.
They're bigger. Introduce.
Yeah, they are. They're bigger than you.
Physically, yeah, they are.

Speaker 2 So we're with two very big stars. One comic I've known for very years.
I don't even know. He's a star? I know he is, but you know, you're not them.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 He's not.

Speaker 2 He's not this. And then we got Andrew, my buddy, right?

Speaker 2 John and I go way back. We did Mad TV together like a couple of CEO.
He punched me, like, slapped my stomach in a sketch. Okay, so, John, he wants to know.
He was scared and nervous. He's nervous now.

Speaker 2 Do you remember the sketch? Yeah, you are. Oh, my God.
Do I remember it? I remember it was yesterday. You got to understand.
I appreciate the kind words, Bobby.

Speaker 2 Look up when he's speaking to you. Or don't, whatever.
No, I need him to look up.

Speaker 2 Look up. We, you know, wrestling in WWE for a long time has been looked at in a certain light.

Speaker 2 And you were kind enough to welcome me on your show and do a bit uh asking me to do some crazy stuff and boy did you take a whole hell of a lot of punishment but you you also gave us an avenue to introduce wwe to a whole different audience so uh thank you for that i greatly appreciate it i remember like it was yesterday and you know you know what mel you know what mal yeah the pleasure's all mine and i

Speaker 2 wow dude he was so nervous that you wouldn't remember him john he was really scared john so nervous

Speaker 2 yeah you were i got scared you were gonna remember me i'm not scared all right

Speaker 2 anyway um tell us about the movie tell us about the backpack tell us about the movie well the movie comes out March 7th on Amazon Prime video and what do you think some of your favorite stuff is what do you mean huh what do you think some of your favorite things in the movie are you saw the trailer

Speaker 2 okay go ahead

Speaker 2 well it's because out of jealousy can we do something real fast by the way with the boys this is kind of how chaotic our show always is but we're gonna call somebody because it's her birthday today did you call her today who is this person Who you're talking about?

Speaker 2 It's your mom's birthday today.

Speaker 2 Is it really? Do you not know what's your mother's birthday today?

Speaker 2 You seriously?

Speaker 2 I swear to God. I sent her a happy birthday first thing in the morning.

Speaker 2 That's insane that you went to the birthday. What's the date? I don't want to be here if it is.
Today is the 13th. This is your mom's birthday.
Yeah, she's not going to pick up for you.

Speaker 2 Well, you call her. I'll pick her.
She's going to pick up for me, not you. She just sent me a bunch of texts.
She sent me photos this morning from the tub. What, like,

Speaker 2 no, just being like enjoying my tub.

Speaker 2 Shriveled up titty? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Her titties are shriveled up, dude.

Speaker 2 Oh, she picked up and hung up. FaceTimer, so you could say.

Speaker 2 Because we'd like to sing happy birthday to Bob's mom. Yeah, yeah.
Because Bobby's 52, his mom is which, how old is your mom? A thousand years old. A thousand, 158.
Yeah, and no one's counting.

Speaker 2 Here we go. But I texted his mom.
This is how I knew what would happen on this show. I texted her first thing in the morning.
Here we go.

Speaker 2 She has a pickup for me. No more money.

Speaker 2 Everyone that's going to send her $3,500, no more money. I thought it was more than that.
That's it now? For 20 years, $3,500 a month is pretty good. It's not bad.

Speaker 2 yeah i mean you're a little bit i'm a good son a little bit cheap if you mean i'm not here to leave a message let's leave a message from

Speaker 2 happy birthday to you no happy birthday to you no happy birthday

Speaker 2 zach and john cena are here to say happy birthday i'm with john cena you know him zach afron you know jermaine fowler

Speaker 2 you're not gonna do it andrew

Speaker 2 She does know me. She knows you.
I know she knows you. So let's sing.
We're gonna sing happy birthday real fast. Ready? One, two, three.
Happy birthday to you.

Speaker 2 Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear mom.
Oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my, oh, my,

Speaker 2 happy birthday to you. Mom, thanks, mom.
Happy birthday.

Speaker 2 Thank you. She's the greatest woman on earth.
She came back to our Phoenix show, and in just like the Lee fashion, she didn't want to talk to anybody.

Speaker 2 She sat on the couch and she was looking at BTS pictures on her iPad for about an hour and a half. She loves them.
That's her favorite. She wishes her son was like BTS.
She wishes you were in. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I'm a fat fuck.
You are. I'm sorry.
But that's okay.

Speaker 2 Anyway, I'm sorry. I should have said that I like that.
Yeah, I'm not sure. I'm so sorry.

Speaker 2 Well, I did this for my body. You know, me and Jermaine were talking about, we were playing a little game, guys.
Can you want to play a little game? Let's play a game. Let's play a game.

Speaker 2 So I was giving him some evergreen movies, and let's just play a little game. And he knew a lot, right? So I'm going to give you some.
And

Speaker 2 if you do this, that's a buzzer. Okay.
All right. Name me one actor in the movie, Mean Streets.
Come on.

Speaker 2 De Niro.

Speaker 2 Jermaine. To Jermaine.
Oh, yeah, go ahead. There's a mic.
Get the mic, Zach. De Niro, right? De Niro.

Speaker 2 Ding, ding, ding. One point for F.

Speaker 2 One point for.

Speaker 2 All right, how about this? One actor in the movie being there.

Speaker 2 Yeah, go ahead. Who's back there? Go ahead.
Who knows?

Speaker 2 Peter Sells, fuck yeah. Very good.
Go random Spanish. One to one.
One to one.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Thank you, Angela.
John, you got to get in on this.

Speaker 2 That's a killer for me. Yeah, I'll help you out here, John.
Here we go. One actor actor in the movie, The Rustler.
Mickey Rourke. What? Mickey Rourke? John, what the fuck, dude?

Speaker 2 That was your layup. That's a layup for you.

Speaker 2 Todd Berry. What? Yeah.
Take this. Take this because you're on the competition.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you're not in it? No.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Say that line again is very funny. I'm competing to the best of my ability.

Speaker 2 I know you are, Jack. No, you're doing good.
You're doing so good, dude.

Speaker 2 You're doing so good. Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 Yeah, one to two. Okay, so here.
All right. Shall I go deep? What?

Speaker 2 Secrets.

Speaker 2 Okay. Name one actor in the movie, Ricky Sanicki.

Speaker 2 Zach.

Speaker 2 Zach Efron.

Speaker 2 Dude.

Speaker 2 Dude, you're in it, dude. You didn't know that, John? I did know that.

Speaker 2 I almost said Matt Damon.

Speaker 2 I almost said Matt Damon.

Speaker 2 I just wanted to say Matt Damon. I don't know why.
Is he Matt Damon in it? All I can see was his face. Maybe he could be in it.

Speaker 2 Are we done with the game or do you want to do one more?

Speaker 2 It's two to two to one.

Speaker 2 Whoever goes a three. Yeah.
And what happens to the winner? What does the winner get? Yeah, what do we get? Oh, you're going to get a 10-second

Speaker 2 hug from me. Wow.

Speaker 2 Wow. It's not, I just, I know this is a movie.
I know we're in Hollywood, right? It's not sexually based. It's more like a soldier.

Speaker 2 Because you know, Hollywood

Speaker 2 is coming home, visiting his dad. You know how they surprise their dad? They have to like more of those kind of hugs.

Speaker 2 Like, welcome home, son. I can't wait.
Thank you. Thank you.
And in my case, maybe the Vietnam War because it's, you know what I mean? Yeah,

Speaker 2 yeah, the Korean War. Let's make it a Korean War because I'm Korean.
Right?

Speaker 2 What the fuck?

Speaker 2 What war do you want, Jermaine? I don't know. You got to pick one.
I did. Okay.

Speaker 2 Jermaine, we can do any war you want. What kind of war hug reenactment would you like?

Speaker 2 Vietnam. Vietnam.
You want Vietnam? Yeah, yeah. Okay, great.
Oh, you want to do Vietnam? Okay, so it's a tie two to two to one. Because of the Lord's Finchfront bird, yes, the reference, yes, yes,

Speaker 2 right? No, no, no, apocalypse now, geez. My bad.
All right, my bad. All right, so go ahead.
What's the final movie question? Okay, here we go. Let's go.

Speaker 2 By the way, Zach paused long enough to not know it was his name in this movie.

Speaker 2 Who's in the movie? He was like, he said Zach Efron. He said Zach Damon.
I almost wanted you to look at your hand like Zach Efron. That's me.

Speaker 2 I just hit the table for a second.

Speaker 2 One actor. One actor.
In the movie,

Speaker 2 Close Encounters in the Third Kind. Ooh, this is good.
Come on.

Speaker 2 Come on, boys. John, do you know? Wow.
Oh,

Speaker 2 I can't think of a single person.

Speaker 2 Come on, John. Just in it, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What's your name? What's your name? Don't you like all of his movies? He's not going to do a name. Well, he's going to get a hug now.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 You're going to have to cherish this hug. This is important.
Richard Dreyfus. Richard Dreyfus is in it? No.
Oh, my God, dude. Zach's buzzed.
He didn't buzz.

Speaker 2 It's Richard Dreyfus. Richard Dreyfus.
He's in it. Give him a hug.
Oh, we do? Yeah, Zach gets along.

Speaker 2 Hold on, hold on. Let me set up the scenario, though.
What? You guys built this up and there's going to be no pain.

Speaker 2 I know that. You pretty much crowned him with a bad thing.
You did up. Yeah, you did.
You just accepted. Yeah,

Speaker 2 moment in your head. Yeah, dude, you didn't want to hug me.
You knew the answer. You didn't want to hug me.
That's fucked up. That's fucked up, dude.
You know what, Jermaine?

Speaker 2 You play out the scene right now with Bobby right behind us. Give a hug like you're coming home from the war.
Well, yeah, we can both be coming home from the war. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Or we've built it up so much we can just take it away from him. Yeah, we could.

Speaker 2 This is a campaign.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 2 All right, Zach. So, Zach, you've just

Speaker 2 been the dad. Okay.
You're the dad. I'm your Korean.
I was adopted.

Speaker 2 Obviously. I was adopted.
No, no, no. What if his wife was Korean? I don't look half Asian.
Yeah, you do.

Speaker 2 You look full Asian, but there. Now that's half.
That's half. That's half.

Speaker 2 Look at that. There's a guy from Tennessee.

Speaker 2 There's a guy from Tennessee.

Speaker 2 There he is. How you doing, man? All right.
Hey, Dan.

Speaker 2 Welcome home, son.

Speaker 2 This is the Korean War. It doesn't make any sense.
Why? What did it make? Why? You're in 1940s.

Speaker 2 1950s.

Speaker 2 You're a soldier from America who fought in Korea. You're half.

Speaker 2 Welcome home, son.

Speaker 2 Oh, well, there he is.

Speaker 2 Well, well, well.

Speaker 2 Oh, we're so glad you're back. You're my dad.
You're his dad. Welcome home, Danny.

Speaker 2 He thought I was going to be dead. Wait a minute.
This doesn't make any sense. You're a half-Korean kid who went to fight in the korean war on the american side fighting against the north koreans

Speaker 2 makes perfect sense now it makes perfect sense of course so walk in the door and hug your son dad yeah but when i walked in dad didn't even give a fuck i was in the room that's what a dad would do really he thought his son was gonna die and i'm surprised you he thought you were gonna make it through i don't think you're the first one to go i know that's why poor that you should be more so you should be shocked that he made it home i don't think he knew you left him a stoic he's a stoic

Speaker 2 he's a stoic dad i didn't know that acting took home all right so here you go you zach this is really showing some good acting chops with your son coming home, your half-Korean son coming home from the Korean War, fighting on the American side, of course.

Speaker 2 He's home. You're reading the paper.
Go ahead.

Speaker 2 Okay, let him do it. Lee's settling in.
Go ahead.

Speaker 2 Who's there?

Speaker 2 Who is there? Well, why would I knock him? I'm going to walk into my own house. No, you don't live there anymore.
He thinks you're dead. It's not a room.
Okay.

Speaker 2 My house seems familiar to me.

Speaker 2 I'm gonna stay. Great.

Speaker 2 Get the fuck out of here, dude.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, sorry, my bad.
He's literally doing his job.

Speaker 2 Dude, I want to Christian bail it, dude. I'll snap, dude.
I'll Christian bail it.

Speaker 2 Don't CB it right now. All right, don't say it.
Don't. Oh, man.
Good to be home.

Speaker 2 Who's that? Who's there? Dan?

Speaker 2 No freaking way.

Speaker 2 No way. No way.

Speaker 2 Dan.

Speaker 2 Is he blind? No, I'm not blind. No, he got blinded from a bomb.
Yeah, from a bomb.

Speaker 2 Wow, you're back. I can't believe you've made it.
Congratulations. How was the war?

Speaker 2 It was terrible, man.

Speaker 2 That's all kinds of things, dad. What are you even wanting more than anything? A hug from your daddy.

Speaker 2 Get a hug from your daddy.

Speaker 2 Count the segments. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Daddy. Oh, son.
I'm so happy you're back. One, one thousand.

Speaker 2 Two, one thousand. Three, one thousand.
Multicam audience? Four, one thousand. Five, 5-1,000.
Or is it not 1,000? It's like Oklahoma. 1, Mississippi.
2, Mississippi. Okay, there it is.

Speaker 2 Give it up for that. That was a great scene.
And you know what? That should be in the movie. That should be in the movie.
That should be in the film. We should.
That's highlighted.

Speaker 2 It's a long 15 seconds.

Speaker 2 So, like three years to me.

Speaker 2 Now it's your turn. Jermaine.

Speaker 2 Okay, we like to do some unorthodox questions on the show. We like to throw.
Yeah, just a little.

Speaker 2 We like to throw you off.

Speaker 2 We like a game called

Speaker 2 Who's the Fatty?

Speaker 2 and uh every week we measure in on our crew who's gained a little bit of weight if you can guess the correct weight of bobby you get a prize uh we have a scale did we bring the scale we didn't did we bring it we didn't bring it

Speaker 2 okay so what do you think what do you think that his current weight is he's looking right stand up and do a spin and shit

Speaker 2 yeah spin god he's looking right at me lift up your shirt

Speaker 2 yeah they need

Speaker 2 because then they kind of because gray is gray looks there it is thanks that helps actually does help

Speaker 2 now if you guess the weight you you get a prize.

Speaker 2 And tell them how tall you are. Five foot? Five four.
No,

Speaker 2 five, two and a half.

Speaker 2 Five, two and a half. Five, two and a half.

Speaker 2 Five two and a half. Five two and a half.
You look good.

Speaker 2 168. 168 from Zach.

Speaker 2 Go ahead. I was going to say 165.
165?

Speaker 2 Six and a half stone. Six and a half stone.

Speaker 2 I have no idea. I don't do any of that European stuff.

Speaker 2 It's got to be. He's good.
That is John. John would give us a task.
How many pounds is 6.5 stone?

Speaker 2 It's 91 pounds. I don't wear 91 pounds.

Speaker 2 Just call it a legacy. A guess is a guess is a guess, dude.
I'm 170. Who got it closest? Zach did? Yep.
And you know what? You get, Zach. Another 10-second hug.

Speaker 2 Another hug.

Speaker 2 Another hug. He's home from the war again.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. Another war.
Another war. Vietnam was Vietnam.

Speaker 2 Oh, dad. He loves the bad.
One Texas.

Speaker 2 Three, Texas.

Speaker 2 Texas Christian University. Four, Texas Christian University.
Five to very good, you guys. Very, very good.
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Thanks for your service, Bobby.

Speaker 2 No, we gotta go everyone with their weight. No, no, no, just you.

Speaker 2 That's the show.

Speaker 2 Well, because yours is the most fun. Yours is the most deceiving.
170 is good. Yours is

Speaker 2 being 5'2 ⁇ , 170 is good? I think so, right?

Speaker 2 That's not good.

Speaker 2 Good. Wait, how tall are you? 5'7? 5'7.
How much do you weigh? 150?

Speaker 2 What is that? What is that?

Speaker 2 What is that? That's normal. Yeah, it is.
That's normal. I'm abnormal.
So, what are you supposed to be? What?

Speaker 2 I should be 140.

Speaker 2 You know how good I'd look, though?

Speaker 2 Move over Stephen Yoon.

Speaker 2 You carry it well.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Your answer might be.

Speaker 2 Okay, so

Speaker 2 ask John. Very serious.

Speaker 2 John, hi. Good to see you again.
Good to see you you. You have not aged.
You look so good. Neither of you.
You look the same. That's not true.
That's completely true. Thank you.

Speaker 2 You're keeping the hair a little bit, sideburns. Thank you so much.
You're the audience. And congratulations.
Thank you on all your success. You as well.
I'm doing okay. You are.
I'm doing okay.

Speaker 2 You are.

Speaker 2 Don't do this.

Speaker 2 What the fuck are you doing?

Speaker 2 John, why was I not in the movie? Oh, fuck.

Speaker 2 That's an honest question.

Speaker 2 My answer is those choices are way above my pay grade. That's the political one.
That's the genuine one.

Speaker 2 I don't have any stroke. Okay.
Efron, what do you think? Why wasn't he in the movie? Did you audition?

Speaker 2 Maybe that. Maybe that too.
Maybe that too.

Speaker 2 What happened? Did you were you aware of it in any capacity? Yeah, I was aware of it. I tracked it.

Speaker 2 You know how you tracked the projects? Oh, were you on the tracking boards? No, but I was like, okay, Ricky Ricky. What role in the movie do you think you have? I forgot what it was.

Speaker 2 What role do you think you could have played in this film? Ricky Ricky. John, okay, so John is Ricky Stanicky.
Yeah, yeah. Of course he is.
He's the guy that we hire to play our alibi best friend.

Speaker 2 Of course he is. Efron and Jermaine and I are the three best friends.
Where do you think you slide in?

Speaker 2 You think you could have gotten Jermaine's role? Yeah, yeah. I mean, is yours black specific? Well, yeah.
Well, you're the minority friend.

Speaker 2 You're in a minority friend. You want to be in my minority friend.
I would, well, what would I be? What would I be? Thank you, dude. We're in the same category.
What would you be?

Speaker 2 Well, at one point, we what could he have been? We ate at a restaurant. I could have.
My partner?

Speaker 2 You couldn't have been his partner. Why? Because in the movie, his partner is a beautiful, little handsome man.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 that's...

Speaker 2 You could have been his partner. Oh, I've...
You know, you could have been his partner. Why God?

Speaker 2 Seconds on Steak Fries? Yes. Yes.
It could have been him. What's that? You'll see

Speaker 2 commercial act. If you saw the movie,

Speaker 2 we actually sent it to you.

Speaker 2 We sent it to you, and you didn't watch it. Can I just,

Speaker 2 I know what you're trying to do right now. I know what you're trying to do right now.
I didn't do anything. Yeah, yeah.
What did I do? I want to let you guys know right now, okay?

Speaker 2 I wish I was in the movie, but I'm okay.

Speaker 2 I'm doing my other things as well what are you doing i got some what i'm not gonna mention things i'm in but i'm just saying i got other things as well and i'm okay with my life so i know what you guys trying to do and i you know i mean fuck you hey no hey

Speaker 2 hey

Speaker 2 you said you were fine too much walk too much you said you were fine no no fuck you fucking fuck you fucking pieces of

Speaker 2 okay i love you as long as you're good

Speaker 2 i'm good i'm good tech yeah yeah don't worry we'll edit all the all that out you can't say fuck you on this well i don't think the press is going to like us anyway. Oh, sorry, my dude.

Speaker 2 I'll cut it out. I promise you.
I'll cut it out.

Speaker 2 Can I still do the eyes sometimes?

Speaker 2 That was pretty good, right?

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 2 No, no, we're going to leave it out. Who sponsors this?

Speaker 2 Evion. Honestly, Evion.

Speaker 2 Anymore?

Speaker 2 Can you hear the wheel? Yeah. You see how empty this room is?

Speaker 2 And we have seven publicists and people that are working on the film on the other side of the camera for the boys ready to pounce at any moment. They're working in anything.

Speaker 2 So where's the movie airing? It's going to be on Amazon Prime Video, March 7th. Very good.
Amazon Prime Video, March 1st. Condescending, condescending, condescending.

Speaker 2 Bobby, do it on purpose, man. It's the 7th.
What? March 7th. March 7th, Amazon Prime Video.

Speaker 2 No, it's not.

Speaker 2 Just Prime. Prime Video.
Just Prime Video. No, it was Amazon Prime Video, not just Prime Video.
He said it's a video. He said, say Video Prime.
Amazon owns Video Prime. Prime Video.

Speaker 2 It'll be on.

Speaker 2 The internet. The Internet.
And your TV. And your TV.
And I'm going to say this because I can't believe, and I'm going to be completely honest with you. Please be honest.
May I be honest?

Speaker 2 Please be honest. Why, with this star of caliber, with the Fairleigh brothers behind it.
Pete Fairley himself, not Bobby. Whatever.

Speaker 2 That's why we only got one of the two Fairleighs.

Speaker 2 Anyway,

Speaker 2 and I cannot believe that it's not going to theaters. We agree.
It should be in the movie theaters. And I don't know who's behind it, but it's probably.

Speaker 2 What? Amazon is behind the whole thing. You know that.
Yeah. Jeff Bezos.
Should we call him? Yeah, you have a story.

Speaker 2 I'll call Bezos right now and I'll ask him what's going on.

Speaker 2 I'm going to call Jeff Bezos right now. He's with his mom.

Speaker 2 Because I'm going to say, and I want you to say, Jeff, put it in the theaters. Will you do that if he picks up? Yeah, yeah.
Please? Yeah, yeah, I will.

Speaker 2 I've never talked to him, but I'll.

Speaker 2 Hold on.

Speaker 2 He's on a yacht or something. Manscaped.
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It's your mom.

Speaker 2 But act as like it's mom. Act like it's Jeff Bezos.
Mom.

Speaker 2 Are you Jeff Bezos?

Speaker 2 Yeah, Jeff.

Speaker 2 Talk to Jeff.

Speaker 2 Anyway, Jeff Bezos.

Speaker 2 Good.

Speaker 2 Jeff Bezos, how come Ricky Stanicki is not in theaters?

Speaker 2 No, I can hear you.

Speaker 2 Happy birthday. Happy birthday.

Speaker 2 Happy birthday, mom. Happy birthday, Jeff Bezos.
Happy birthday, Jeff Bezos.

Speaker 2 Mom?

Speaker 2 Oh, you're on the iPad? She doesn't want to speak in English because she knows she's listening. Okay.

Speaker 2 No, it's okay, mom.

Speaker 2 Answer one question. She's about to die, I think.
That was her back.

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 2 She just called me my brother's head. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Okay, mom. Anyway, the better, brother.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Jeff Bezos.

Speaker 2 Jeff Bezos

Speaker 2 sounds weird.

Speaker 2 What is he doing?

Speaker 2 Jeff. Bye, Jeff.

Speaker 2 Jeff.

Speaker 2 Put it in the theaters. Please.

Speaker 2 Mom, what the fuck is Borto? Yeah, all right. I'll talk to you later, okay?

Speaker 2 Okay, okay. Bye, Jeff.

Speaker 2 Wow. I don't think he needed us for this interview.
He sounds different.

Speaker 2 The call was redirected.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he's under a little medication, Jeff.

Speaker 2 What's been going on with Chief?

Speaker 2 What's going on with Chief Bezo?

Speaker 2 What's been going on?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's living that.
Yeah, yeah, man. Well, you know, when Jeff hears us, he gets so excited.
He does. He turns Korean.
He turns Korean.

Speaker 2 He turns into an old Korean woman. It's interesting.
You know, one of those things, you know? Well, that's the, well, look, it's going to be out on March 7th.

Speaker 2 And that is the new world that we live in now.

Speaker 2 And it's going to be everyone's TV because they don't have to go to the theater to watch it. They can watch it at home.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Watch it on your phone. It's going to be great.
It's going to be a hit, and I'm really very looking forward to it. You're very looking forward to it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I cannot wait. Well, okay, so do some sign-off questions with the boys.
I know you want some one-on-one time. You begged for it.
You got all nervous before we came here. I wasn't nervous, dude.

Speaker 2 I was nervous. No, I'll tell you.
It was pacing and smoking. Even my colona.
Which were not smoking. I hope your colono was great.

Speaker 2 I wasn't pacing. Here's why, right?

Speaker 2 Here's why, is because, you know, we live in a podcast world where we can say whatever we want. And here I have to be a little bit more, you know, professional about it.
And

Speaker 2 it lives, it lives, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, I, you know, I meant it,

Speaker 2 you know, I meant it, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I meant it, but no, I was like,

Speaker 2 thank you so much, yeah,

Speaker 2 so I was just wondering, like, how am I gonna be able to navigate it? But I think it went pretty good so far, wonderful job,

Speaker 2 pretty good so far.

Speaker 2 So, do a sign-off question with each of the guys. What does that mean? You asked them that final question that you read, the final question you really wanted to ask.

Speaker 2 Okay, so I want to, all right, so John,

Speaker 2 um,

Speaker 2 how's your mom? She's fantastic.

Speaker 2 See, honestly, she's fantastic.

Speaker 2 I often confuse her with Jeff Bezos,

Speaker 2 but she's fantastic. Thank you so much for that.
I'll tell her that

Speaker 2 you said hello. Signing off, thank you.

Speaker 2 Zach,

Speaker 2 Zach.

Speaker 2 Is he as handsome as you were?

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Can I say something?

Speaker 2 Sure. I'm not.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I'm not, you know, I like women.

Speaker 2 What's that?

Speaker 2 You like women? I like women. Do you want me to tell the guys what you said before we started? No, I don't want to to do that, but what I'm going to say is that I like women.

Speaker 2 You like all people.

Speaker 2 Humans, yeah. You like humans.
100%.

Speaker 2 But right now, at this stage, you're into girls. I've always been.
Well, okay. Okay.
Yeah, that's fine.

Speaker 2 I shouldn't even say that. I'm just saying that, you know, I was like, I wasn't wondering if Zach Effron is as handsome as in real life.

Speaker 2 Oh, so you're saying, in case you might not be into women, would Zach Evren? I'm 100% into women. It's fine if you're not.
But I'm reminding you of a woman.

Speaker 2 Do you just say remind you of a woman? No, no. Is that what you're talking about?

Speaker 2 I got to get it out.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. I'm just saying, what I'm saying is that

Speaker 2 you look just as good as I perceived you to be. On the scale of what you thought he was going to, what does this have to do with you liking Winnie? Thanks, bro.

Speaker 2 Because I don't want him to think he's hitting on me or whatever. Well, try to hit on him and see if he's into it.
No, I don't want to do that. Try to hit on him and see if he's into it.

Speaker 2 You have beautiful eyes. Your eyes are stunning.
That was a little bit of a

Speaker 2 hit. Oh, right, right.
Thanks for these questions. Are those your real eyes?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I told you. Fucking you're right.
I told you the whole time. Those are his fake eyes.
No, CGI.

Speaker 2 CGI.

Speaker 2 AI, dude. Those are Bezos made eyes.
Those are real, dude. No, they're real.
They are.

Speaker 2 This is the question you wanted to ask. Bobby wants to know if you'd ever be interested in any sort of world if you'd go to a dinner date with him.

Speaker 2 I never said that. I don't even answer that.
That's ridiculous. One-on-one with you.
I'm never going to see you again. I'm going to date with him.
It's not. It's platonic.

Speaker 2 I'm never going to see him again. It's platonic.
It's a friend. Do you want to go on him? We could do a group thing one day.
You one-on-one. I'm not not going to want to watch it.

Speaker 2 Let me go back to Jermaine. Ask him.
Fuck you. Ask him.
Will you want to go out of dude?

Speaker 2 Bottom of my heart, I'd love to. Okay, that was what I said.
Thank you. Woo! It wasn't that hard.
You just got to ask. All right, Jermaine's final question.
So, Jermaine, you know, can I say this?

Speaker 2 Can I make a statement first and then a question? You've done that the whole time, so yeah. Thank you.
Thank you. I don't know why you've stopped.
I have to say, look at me, dude.

Speaker 2 Jermaine, lean in, please.

Speaker 2 I've known you for a while. How long have you been? I've known you for a while.
I think so.

Speaker 2 Why are you so shy right now? Yeah, yeah. So cute.
And before we did this, I said you checked every one of my boxes.

Speaker 2 Yes, you did, yeah. Is that your question? No, I'm making a statement.

Speaker 2 Oh, right. It's always statement first.
And, you know,

Speaker 2 the look game, the style. Yeah, bad.
I like it.

Speaker 2 And also, the funny game, dude.

Speaker 2 Too legit to quit, dude. Amazing.
You don't have to do like a black phrase when you do that. You don't have to do that.

Speaker 2 You can just say,

Speaker 2 oh, let me. I'm sorry, my bad.
You don't have to do that. Your comedy game is okey-dokie.
That's so white. That's so white.
I would give it like a more uplifting white phrase. What?

Speaker 2 Like, you know, Kawabanga, man. Kawabonga, yeah.

Speaker 2 Kawabanga. Your comedy game is Kawabanga.
Kawabunga, dude.

Speaker 2 It's out of sight. Out of sight.

Speaker 2 Right. But guess what?

Speaker 2 Guess what, dude? What? What game did I realize today?

Speaker 2 That my movie game? No, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 2 Oh, cologne game. Yeah.
You like my cologne game. Your smell, dude, bro.
Was I was going to say too legit? Too quit again. Yeah, don't do that.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 A-O-K. Amazing.
A-OK.

Speaker 2 I don't know. No, top line.
Top line. Top of the line.
Let's go higher. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's

Speaker 2 top notch, top notch. Thank you.
Top notch, top notch. Thank you, man.
Top notch. And

Speaker 2 I took a photo of the cologne you were wearing. You did? Yeah.
Have you smelled him, guys? Could you guys get in and smell him real fast? Just so you can see it. No, because I sprayed.

Speaker 2 How is it, Zach? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What does it smell like? Yeah, yeah.
John, John. John, take a huff.

Speaker 2 John smells. John, take a huff real fast.

Speaker 2 Wow. Too legit, right?

Speaker 2 Is that too legit to quit? John, John, John, John. John, John, John.
Too much, John. John, is it

Speaker 2 the assessment, John?

Speaker 2 I don't know how legit that is. It smells great.
Thank you, man. Wow.
I'll tell you what it's not going to quit. That's for sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Honestly, you hit the smell game, dude.

Speaker 2 And you're number one on my bunk. Out of all the people at the table? No.

Speaker 2 He's third.

Speaker 2 All right, give him a tough question. Yeah, so

Speaker 2 do you like me?

Speaker 2 Can I be honest with you? Yeah, be completely honest. I've been a fan of you since I was in middle school, man.

Speaker 2 And I've always thought you were fucking hilarious. And this is really cool to meet you.
Me too, bro. He's going to cry.

Speaker 2 No, I'm not joking. I think I told you this in the van when we did that comedy festival.
I'm joking.

Speaker 2 I just want to hear it again. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Huge fan, huge fan, John. John?

Speaker 2 Huge?

Speaker 2 John's huge. John is huge.

Speaker 2 I know you're huge. Huge fan, huge fan, huge.
I know you're huge. John's huge.
Yeah. So anyway, good luck with the movie.

Speaker 2 What do you tell everybody at home, where do they see the movie? What's it called again? As Amazon Prime. March 5th.
March 7th. 7th.
Ricky Stanicky. Prime video.
Prime video. Ricky Stanicky.
Stanicky.

Speaker 2 Watch it. Fairley.
Peter. Peter Fairley.
Yeah. Thank you for being a bad friend.
Hey, bad friends. This shirt, I don't trust soup, is in the movie Ricky Stanicky.

Speaker 2 John Cena is wearing it, and one of the writers of the film, Brian Jarvis, and the director, the great legendary Pete Fairley, decided make these shirts, sell them out there, and a big, big chunk of the proceeds goes to Make-A-Wish Foundation, which Mr.

Speaker 2 John Cena is heavily involved in, and we love and believe in it too. So, you want to support Make-A-Wish? Go to IdonTrustSoup.com and buy this shirt.
I don'ttrustsoup.com and buy it

Speaker 2 for the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Thank you.

Speaker 2 Welcome back to the Bad Friends Comcast. Coming to you live.
Zach Afron is not that good looking. Hottest guy on earth.

Speaker 2 You know, I could talk shit now, man. He's thicker than I, he's too thick for me.
Thick? He's hot, Bobby? Yeah. What do you mean he's thick? What would be too thick?

Speaker 2 Strong? Yeah, he's too. No, he's just too perfect.
Too perfect?

Speaker 2 His blue eyes, dude, pierced my butthole, dude. Beautiful.
He was so X-Men fucking mutant power, dude. I was so into him.
When you shot in office.

Speaker 2 It was so hard to shoot with him because I always wanted to kiss him. I put that in the script.
I'd say, what if we had a kissing scene? Yeah, he's kidding.

Speaker 2 he and he was like what do you mean a kissing scene i said what if our we're best friends yes and he says yeah and i said what if we have a little smooching scene yeah uh look at that there's a picture of the crew there's uh me john cena zach efron giving you bunny ears classic f classic f-dog and jermaine fowler another great actor and comedian a fellow stand-up the the new lawrence fishburne

Speaker 2 uh you know i don't know if he like he would like that but maybe he is i already told him you look like him he doesn't really look like lawrence fishburne i know you you thought that was the essence.

Speaker 2 Like, I have the essence of Jet Lee. No.

Speaker 2 That's what everyone says. No, you don't.
Everyone says. No.

Speaker 2 Maybe Jumbo Jet Lee. I was going to say that.

Speaker 2 Jumbo Lee. Jumbo Jet Lee.
Jumbo Jet Lee.

Speaker 2 That was fun, though, today with the guys. Oh, what a great job.
I really do hope people like the movie.

Speaker 2 And I'm thank you very much. Congratulations.
I'm very grateful for you to come do that for me.

Speaker 2 That was a great movie. I thought it was.
You saw it? Yeah. Well, how? For the first time, Andrew.
How about Drugstore June? You see that?

Speaker 2 See, that's the thing that's the thing

Speaker 2 see that's the thing you're into his shit you're not into my okay first of all it's not a competition and let's be real here we're supporting both of our films drugstore june is gonna be an incredible film a great success and i hope this one is too it's gonna be they're both great with a lot of people that we we hope do well i want to talk about vegas with for you for a second i want to hear all about vegas number one man it looked so fun the number one question i got from everybody was where's andrew shut up dude 100 don't pander to me now don't do that because you know know I was upset.

Speaker 2 Don't do that. Shut up.
That's everyone's. Tom, Bert, where's is Andrew here? And Tom and Bert asked about me? Yeah.
Shoot me a text and invite me to the show.

Speaker 2 Fucking put me on the show. I told you I invited myself.
They didn't invite me. Yes, they did.
I said that. Can I go? And they go, are you sure? I go, yes.
And I went.

Speaker 2 You know why they fucking didn't invite me and they invited you on the show? Because they wanted this to happen on the air. That's not why.
Yeah. They wanted us to have some live beef.

Speaker 2 Will Compton was there. Will's there.
You know?

Speaker 2 De Stefano. Chris DeSato.
Soder. Soder.
Shane Gillis. Shane Gillis.
Well, of course, Shane Gillis, he's sponsored by Bud Light now. He has

Speaker 2 changed the game. And then

Speaker 2 who else was there? Paulie Shore came. He lives in Vegas.
Oh, that's not Adam Ray. What? Adam Ray.
Adam Ray did it. Warren Sapp was there.
Joey Fatone.

Speaker 2 Can I tell you about that fucking old-timey fucker of Warren Sapp? What do you mean? You don't like him? That old fucking timey motherfucker. What happened?

Speaker 2 I'll tell you something right now about that old times. Yeah.
Open up about Warren Sapp. I'll tell you about Warren Sapp right now, dude.
And I'm going to say this to his fucking face, dog.

Speaker 2 Do it, dog. Warren, listen to me right here and be clear about it right now.
I'm going to be very clear, right? Yeah. You ain't got shit.
What does that even mean? You ain't got shit.

Speaker 2 I'll tell you why, dude. Can I tell you why? I'm waiting.
So, Burt and Tom, they do teams. Yeah, football teams.
Yeah, they divided you guys up. Right.
Obviously, I'm the last guy picked. No.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Right? They even picked you as one.
Warren Sabs.

Speaker 2 What's his name? Snappy Snap. Sap, like Trees.
I call him Snap. Warren Trees.
Warren Snap goes, nah, nah.

Speaker 2 To you.

Speaker 2 To fucking Tom Segura. Nah, nah, not him.
I was the last guy. Of course me.
Yeah, but maybe they could have done it without you. So then we just want this old-time motherfucker.
You know what it's?

Speaker 2 What'd he say?

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 number one, I did the best out of everyone in all the competitions. I was MVP.
In all the athletic competitions? All of them. They couldn't believe it.
Ask Segura. What were the competitions?

Speaker 2 Punting, throwing a ball. Eating rice was one of them.
No, no, no. And also punting it through the fucking goalposts.
You did that better than anybody. Tom didn't make one.

Speaker 2 Let me, can I tell my story? Please. All right.
Will Compton didn't make any? Look at me celebrating

Speaker 2 like a champion. And ask Tom right now.
I was so proud of you. No, so Tom.
I really was. So it's the last event.
They do the punt.

Speaker 2 ot comes up to me

Speaker 2 ot yeah ot genesis no old time oh sap adap sap adap yeah old time comes up to me goes sir let me tell you how you do it and i go oh yeah how do i do it so you place the ball he goes take put your foot right here take three steps back then just follow the motion forward and then kick it yeah seems pretty logical exactly but i go yo my body doesn't work like yours

Speaker 2 yeah my body is you guys might have similar working bodies. I don't know, but

Speaker 2 my kicking is more karate.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're all right. Haya.
It's more of a haya kind of a thing, right? Yeah. So, nah, I'm, you know, Warren Sapp.
I know what I'm doing. So I do it it is a way.

Speaker 2 It went right into the ground, went up to the left. It didn't get even any lift.
So when you did his one, yeah, you're more haya. Right, so I have two shot tries, right? Hi, yo.

Speaker 2 So, and I, the second tree, he goes, no, do it again. Cause you just, that was a practice.
I go, no, man. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about, dog.
Back off, Warren Sapp.

Speaker 2 Back the fuck up, sap dog. I took 50 steps back.
5-0? Yeah. Okay, were you in the stadium? And I ran toward it.

Speaker 2 What? Were you in the stadium still? No, I ran toward it. Okay.
Kicked it right between the goalposts. God bless.
And I got it. Tom didn't make one.
Burt? Compton didn't make one. Bert made one.

Speaker 2 Was Taylor there with Will? No, Taylor wasn't there. Wow.
But my point being is that there he is.

Speaker 2 There's my man. So tell us what else you did in Vegas.

Speaker 2 Did you gamble? I lost thousands of dollars. Did you meet any ladies? No.
No ladies? No ladies. What about

Speaker 2 Guy Fieri? Are you his new BFF? We argued about mozzarella sticks. What was your argument? His is no good.
He doesn't like them. He goes, what do you mean? I go, yours is no good.
I had a restaurant.

Speaker 2 It's no good. Oh, yeah.
And then he goes, I don't know what you're talking about. I don't even know what restaurant we would have mozzarella sticks.

Speaker 2 I swear to fucking God, Guy Guy. I call him Guy Guy.
Look up Guy Fieri's restaurant menu. I bet you there's mozzarella sticks on there.
Was he lying?

Speaker 2 I don't know and i go it's no good you don't you it's too much too much cheese too much deep fries all right and um then we kind of kind of fight it's like no you don't know what you're talking about i make the best best mozzarella sticks there we go i don't think i don't see it on there i know jalapeno pig poppers yeah

Speaker 2 dynamite shrimp all right so he doesn't have mozzo sticks so then he was there um argued and then um who else was there Vincent was there. VV.

Speaker 2 Who else was there?

Speaker 2 What else? Stefano. And And who's the most Hollywood motherfucker out of this crew? It's you, Papa.
Yeah, yeah. You, little baby.

Speaker 2 You know Zach Arfron and John Cena? I don't. I did a movie with them.
Exactly. That's Hollywood.
I didn't work with these people. I just did a show.
How much more fun did you have?

Speaker 2 You just got to go to Vegas and kick footballs with Warren Sapadopoulos. That's true.
Yeah. I didn't know who he was.
I still don't. He was a.
I refused to know. Okay, I won't tell you.

Speaker 2 I refuse to know. Well, God bless.
Did you have any other fun in Vegas that you want to share?

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 2 You ate a lot of good food. You called me.
Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh, fuck.
Thank you for saying that. You got it.

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It's so annoying.

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Bad friends. I don't know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 No, no, no. It's a good intro.
I know, but I'm so excited.

Speaker 2 I went to the best restaurant

Speaker 2 I've ever

Speaker 2 been to. What is it called? I forgot.
No, I'm kidding.

Speaker 2 It's called Bizarre Meets. Oh, Bizarre Meets.
Yeah. By Jose Andres.
By Jose Andres. By Jose Andres.
And I'm going to say something to you, dude. Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 2 They brought out the Wagyu A5 Kobe beef. Sure.

Speaker 2 And they brought out a certificate with a stamp and everything.

Speaker 2 What does that even mean? I didn't read it.

Speaker 2 I didn't read it, but I held it. Right.
And it looked professional. Well, it's stamped.
And some of it was in Japanese, and it was signed by some, maybe a cow.

Speaker 2 This is my meat, you know what I mean? I'm very delicious.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 and so the guy goes.

Speaker 2 This is what the guy goes. The guy goes,

Speaker 2 You know, you know, sometimes, you know, sometimes people eat it raw. And I go, give me raw.
Yeah, you can. I know.
So he gave me a slice of Wagyu beef raw.

Speaker 2 And it melted right in my mouth.

Speaker 2 Who picked up the tab?

Speaker 2 Tom. Tommy.
Yeah. Good.
It was. Can I tell you? Guess how much it was? It's 10 people at the table.
10 people? Yeah. I don't know.
20 grand? No. I don't know.

Speaker 2 What the fuck? People were drinking, right? I'm sure a bunch of those alcoholics were going ham. $7,500.
Jesus Christ. He picked up the tab.
But it was the best meal I've ever had.

Speaker 2 I mean, everything that they brought out was like, that was the best of whatever that is. Yeah.
And in the middle of eating Wagyu, you guys were like, where's Andrew? Boom, boom, boom.

Speaker 2 They did. No, the fuck they did it.
Yeah, they did.

Speaker 2 I didn't get one phone call. I didn't get one text.
I got nothing. You know how many feet? You know what I got? You know what I got? I called you to say hi, to chat.
You didn't, you didn't.

Speaker 2 The fuck, I didn't. I did too, call you.
Yeah, you did. Piece of shit.

Speaker 2 I got nothing from nobody. Oh, shut up, dude.
I sat at home. You fucking did the Bert Chrysler one in Vegas.
Was I invited to that? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
You were. And you didn't do it.

Speaker 2 I said, no.

Speaker 2 Anyway, we missed you.

Speaker 2 We really did. It would have been great to have you there, bud.

Speaker 2 Good to see you now, though. When I saw you today, I was very excited.
I was excited to see you. Anyway.
I just don't like being not with my Prince.

Speaker 2 I figured I should be with my little Prince in Vegas.

Speaker 2 But think about the lineup. It went Trevor Wallace,

Speaker 2 me, Shane Gillis, Santa, because Stefano didn't go up. Soder didn't go up.
Oh, they didn't go up. No, they didn't go up.
They were just hanging out there.

Speaker 2 So what what I'm saying is that it's overkill. What they should have done is gone, Trevor, me, and you together, and just have me sit there and watch you perform on stage.

Speaker 2 That would have been great, and then just Shane. Yeah, yeah, why not? Yeah, I would have, I would have brought out a chair, sat there, eaten some the bizarre by Jose Andre.

Speaker 2 You would have, but I want to when I because it was tag team back again, so I had to bring Shane up

Speaker 2 on stage, yeah. Let me guess the reception was huge.

Speaker 2 Let me guess. People lost their fucking minds.

Speaker 2 Let me guess. How'd you know? It broke the fucking noise barrier or whatever? In my body, it did.
Was it a Concorde Jet flight? Yeah. Let me guess.
It was incredible.

Speaker 2 He's the most famous comic in the world. Let me guess.
Yes. Oh, that's right? 100%.
Of course it is, dude. Chain's top tier shit, dude.
He's the biggest comic in the world.

Speaker 2 I don't think there's a bigger comic right now, in my opinion. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Sponsored by Bud Light, doing SNL,

Speaker 2 which is insane. He flipped that motherfucking place, that's incredible.
Yeah, biggest Netflix special of the year. Yeah,

Speaker 2 who's bigger than that guy? And I mean it, but you know what I did. Dave Chappelle, somewhere is just like, this motherfucker's out of his mind.
But he's the biggest. I did something weasily.

Speaker 2 Oh, what did you do to

Speaker 2 this? Is what I wanted to hear. This is the weasel part of me.
Oh, and the coward part. Oh, yeah, they're usually the same thing.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 The night before, I saw the lineup. Damn.
And it went Trevor,

Speaker 2 Shane, and then me.

Speaker 2 Oh, how's that Weasley?

Speaker 2 Well, how I got out of it. That makes perfect sense.
It doesn't.

Speaker 2 No, I'm saying you switching is the right move. I know, but I had to beg.
Shane? No, I had to beg Tom.

Speaker 2 And I said, number one, ask him. I said, I swear to God, I'll blow you.
Did you do it? No. And I go, you can have your money back.
Did you give him his money back? No, he said he refused. Okay.

Speaker 2 And after some begging, I got on my hands and knees. Begging.

Speaker 2 I go, please.

Speaker 2 He's the man of the moment. Why would he care if you switch? Actually, that's just bad lineups.
You absolutely. Would you be scared if you followed in front of 15,000 people, Shane Gillis?

Speaker 2 I'm not scared. It's just

Speaker 2 not the right order. I would have done it.
He's the bigger comic. It's not the right order.
Yeah, he should be. Exactly.
That's what I thought. It's not like you're not going to do great.

Speaker 2 You're going to kill. I know.

Speaker 2 But it's just he's the thing right now. Yeah, he's the man of the moment.
You got to give him his fucking, what do you call it? Give him his do. Do.
Yeah. Give him his roses.
And then his dad, too.

Speaker 2 Nice man yeah yeah anyway

Speaker 2 all done with vegas ha ha ha anyway let's move on go to that thing i sent you the thing about bobby i'm curious about this this is insane bobby full screen there i love it what the fuck is this were you recording for a movie

Speaker 2 i'm so embarrassed that you saw that it's all over the internet yeah everybody saw this what is this dude

Speaker 2 Are you recording for a movie? This has to be for like Death and Ramen or a movie. No, no, no.
You're licking an ice cream cone. Yeah, I'm on Instagram Live.
What's up?

Speaker 2 What were you shooting? This was you shooting for something. No, I'm not.
I'm on Instagram Live. What's up, dude? I can't do Instagram lives anymore on the streets.

Speaker 2 I mean, this is the most Asian shit I've ever seen you do in my entire life. Yeah.
What does it say? Can someone help me find Bobby Lee's NPC burner account? Because I've never seen him go live. Okay.

Speaker 2 Dude, so what is the deal, though? It's, you know, Dylan Francis? Yeah, it's his music video. Music video.
Yeah, that's what it is. I knew it was something.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't know why that's out there. Someone recorded it.
It looks looks like a crazy person. Well, you're out on the fucking middle of the street.
It looks like a crazy person.

Speaker 2 What do you think you're thinking there? What? What do you think is going through your head? Career's over. I don't know.

Speaker 2 No. I was, you know, I commit to, like, he wanted me to go out there and do that, and I committed to it.
You really did. Yeah.
I commit to everything I do.

Speaker 2 But it was, it was fun, that music video. So anyway, let's.
I love him. It's great.
But no, let's let this ride in the background for me. Why? I don't really, really.

Speaker 2 What, that's all over the internet? Yeah, they love it. Some guy posted, someone out their window must have recorded recorded it

Speaker 2 yeah well does that look like me yes does that look like you it could be any other guy couldn't be anybody but you really there's not even if you drove by you're the only guy i know that wears 70 pounds of in their in their pockets yeah you're right you're right you at all times look like you have cargo pants on because your pockets are so full you're right you're right you're right you know joe rogan is like a fanny pack guy you're a full pocket guy i have a lot of things in my pockets you're a big pocket guy can we move on from it because i don't want to want to see it again i kind of love watching

Speaker 2 You do what you do. You do what you do.
Yeah. And we all, I do.
You see what you do. It's not embarrassing.
I just think I was fascinated by it. You do what you do, my friend.

Speaker 2 What else do you want to talk about?

Speaker 2 I don't know. Don't live in it so deeply.
What? Don't live in the moment so deeply. I will live in the moment.
Live right now. Feel me.
Feel me right now. What do you feel? Okay.

Speaker 2 I'm about to sell my house.

Speaker 2 That's what you?

Speaker 2 I know you are. But the house you're going to get? No, no, I'm not getting it.
I'm going to move. Where are you going?

Speaker 2 New York. I don't know if I should tell you.
Tell me.

Speaker 2 Before you say it, may I say something?

Speaker 2 If you move to a different city outside of Los Angeles,

Speaker 2 I'm ending the podcast. Okay.

Speaker 2 And that's just a warning to you and the fans out there. I will not do it unless we move together.
So then move with me. Where are you going? We're going to Austin, Texas.
I'll go.

Speaker 2 I knew you would say yes. I'll go to Austin.
No, I'm not going there. You know what I would do is I would.
You do want to move there. You told me.

Speaker 2 No, what I would do is I would get you, we would like get a, rent a house there. And be the bad friends kind of like a

Speaker 2 residency down there. A residency down there.
We should revive and make our own show called.

Speaker 2 I'm going to ask you a question.

Speaker 2 You're going to be so mad.

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 2 Promise you're not going to be mad? Well, no.

Speaker 2 You just promise me. Yeah, I promise I'm not going to get mad.
And you're not going to get infuriated. I promise.
And if you say no, that's fine. I'll do no.
Okay.

Speaker 2 You know I love Star Trek.

Speaker 2 Oh.

Speaker 2 Already.

Speaker 2 Already. Already.
I didn't say anything. What is it?

Speaker 2 And me and Adam Egot

Speaker 2 want to start a Star Trek podcast.

Speaker 2 If you do that, I'll quit this show.

Speaker 2 I will quit this show. Why? Because that is insane.

Speaker 2 Because we've gotten in fights relentlessly because you're going to do too many podcasts. Can I pitch it? Every fucking person on earth that's like, hey, Bob, come on my podcast.

Speaker 2 You're like, where is it? Where do I got to be?

Speaker 2 And then with this show, it's like, when do we have to shoot?

Speaker 2 This is the fucking one to do. That's not what I do.
You do everybody's podcast. I do this one as well.
And I do it with. This is the one that matters.
I know. This is the one.
Okay.

Speaker 2 Can I pitch it, though? You know what this is like? This is like you, this is like you're on.

Speaker 2 battle, but we're trying. You're on Johnny Carson.
Every week, you're on Johnny Carson. And Johnny can do another show somewhere else.
No. On Bravo or whatever.
He doesn't.

Speaker 2 He does. That's the point.
Yeah, yeah. He doesn't.
You're fucking Johnny Carson. You have your own show.
And instead, you're like, maybe I should go check out what's going on at CW.

Speaker 2 Why? Can I stop, though? No,

Speaker 2 you have to do a podcast with fucking Adam Eagan about Star Trek. Because when are you going to get around to be

Speaker 2 it's not as much.

Speaker 2 It's going to be more less frequent when we put it out.

Speaker 2 Like once a month. No.
I don't approve. Absolutely not.
Four times a year. No.

Speaker 2 Can we do one pilot? You can't do any.

Speaker 2 What if you produce it?

Speaker 2 Interesting.

Speaker 2 Because I'm telling you, it's not going to seep into our numbers.

Speaker 2 We're going to be wearing Star Trek.

Speaker 2 We're wearing Star Trek uniforms. The whole background is going to be Star Trek.
I don't want to. And we're only going to talk about Star Trek.
I don't want to.

Speaker 2 I'm not hindering you, and I never have any way, ever, for our whole life and career.

Speaker 2 Come on. All I'm saying.
Please. It's just more time.

Speaker 2 It's time that you don't have. No, here's.
Can I just last? Time you don't have.

Speaker 2 I'm going to go to Austin. Okay, then I'm going to do a podcast with DeStefano in the same amount of episodes you do.
It's got to be specific to a thing, though. Yeah, sure.
It'll be funny.

Speaker 2 It'll be a funny podcast. No, but if it's like, oh, we're going to do a podcast about like comedy.
It'll be about comedy. 90-day fiancé, then I'll be like, it's a specific thing.
Okay.

Speaker 2 I'll find some bullshit to make up. For every episode you do with him, I'll do one with Chris.
Oh, okay. I'm not doing it then.
Thank you.

Speaker 2 Also, Adam Egret, he has his hands full. No, he wants, we've wanted,

Speaker 2 our dream. Who's producing that podcast? Not you guys.
It was going to be Tom Seguro.

Speaker 2 Really? He said he wanted to do it? That's even funnier. They tell me to do it.
Well, here's the deal. Yeah.
You go do whatever it is that you want to do.

Speaker 2 No, because if you're going to do it with De Stefano, I'm not going to do mine. Interesting.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Can I say something? You're saying that Adam Egot is DeStefano. You got to pick somebody at Adam Eget's fucking level.
They're the same. It's not.

Speaker 2 Chris owns a comedy club in New York, just like Adam runs fucking Joe's. Yeah, but Adam's not a fucking podcaster.
Neither is DeStefano. Yes, he is.
No, he's not. He's a big name.

Speaker 2 So I'm saying if I said, oh, I'm going to do one with like Tom Arnold.

Speaker 2 Fine. I'd love that.
Well, not Tom Arnold, but. Yeah, do it.
But that's different than.

Speaker 2 I know, but this wasn't going to be a fucking tit for tat. This is going to be just, if you want to do your little nerd podcast and fly out to Austin and play dress up with him, then go do it.

Speaker 2 Okay, you know what I'm going to do? Now I'll go to New York. No, no, no.
Get my apartment. You're not getting an apartment there.
I am.

Speaker 2 And I'll fucking live in my little apartment with Chris and he'll come over and we'll have fun. All right, if you move to New York, though, I'm not going out there to shoot episodes.

Speaker 2 The fuck, you're not. Yes, you are.
I'm not. I'm flying you out.
I'm not flying out. No, I'm not flying out.
What's that? The average weather in Austin, it's terrible. Oh, this is a good thing.

Speaker 2 Oh, really? That's going to be a deterrent? Come on. Yeah, you like jungle shit.
This is fucking like night. I like jungle shit.
How dare you, dude? You like tropics and jungle. I know that about you.

Speaker 2 I like all environments. I'm a mountaintop guy, too.
I don't think you like Texas. I'm a mountain man.
You're not a mountain man. Fuck you.
First of all, you're a mountain boy.

Speaker 2 You're not a mountain man. Okay, I'll be a boy.
You can't start a fire on your own. You can't pitch a tent.

Speaker 2 Excuse me. Can you catch and kill an animal in the wild and eat it and kill it? A butterfly?

Speaker 2 How much protein is in a butterfly? Yeah. You'd last like 60 seconds.
No, you ever watch those? We talk about survival. I love alone.
Yeah, I'm more of a fucking gatherer.

Speaker 2 Oh, you know what I saw today on the internet that blew my fucking mind? I love it. Google the amount of churches that are in the United States.
This is crazy. This I was on my car ride this morning.

Speaker 2 The amount of churches in the United States, guess, look at me. Guess before you see it.
How many churches are in the United States do you think? Oh my God. I mean,

Speaker 2 just, I know it's tough, but guess. It's a hard one.
Don't look. Don't look.
Okay. How many churches do you think exist?

Speaker 2 Just for perspective, there are, Google this. There's, I think there's

Speaker 2 15,000 McDonald's. How many McDonalds in the United States? This will give you perspective.

Speaker 2 Yeah, McDonald's. Excuse me.
You see McDonald's everywhere. Starbucks.
McDonald's in the UK. Starbucks, too.
McDonald's currently has 36,000 restaurants in 100 countries. That's the world.

Speaker 2 In the United States, 14,000 McDonald's. And they look like they're fucking everywhere.
Everywhere. 14,000.
Yeah. In the whole United States.
Yeah. How many churches? It can't be as much as that.

Speaker 2 Guess

Speaker 2 12,000. 350,000.

Speaker 2 350,000. Oh, you just, you're all congregations.
I said churches. I was thinking about just like, you know what I mean? Well, it's not Zoroastrian.
No.

Speaker 2 But look at that. Okay, so of those, 314,000 are Protestant or Christian.
So yeah, it's almost all.

Speaker 2 How many are Christian? 314, the majority. Dominant majority.
Shit, dude. Isn't that crazy? I've never been to one.
I know. We should start going to some.
Have you been to any of them?

Speaker 2 Yeah, what do you mean? I've been to church.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, you went, right? I'm going to go back. You went with? Who'd you go with? To church? Yeah.
Did you recently go? With my, with my. No, I haven't gone in a long time.
Oh.

Speaker 2 With my family, I've gone. Somebody who just, as a friend of mine that just went.
I got invited to go to one of those New Age churches. Oh, dumbfounded.
He goes, well, Koreans go to church.

Speaker 2 You know why, though? Because that's where you hook up. That's where they are.

Speaker 2 He goes, you know, man, I'm just going to look at a different pool.

Speaker 2 At church? No, that is where it is. But he's saying, you would be surprised.
I might go. No, you should.
But But you're not have to do the whole thing. What? Pretend.
Pretend to listen?

Speaker 2 No, to get them? Maybe, you know what? Can I say something? Maybe you'll get something out of it. I'm about to start going to church.
You know what? I'll go with you. Will you really? I will suit up.

Speaker 2 Because I think it's important. We should try it.
Put the Lu Hao hat on.

Speaker 2 You don't. No, you're not going to wear a Yamaka.
That's insane.

Speaker 2 Can I... Why? Why don't you wear a samurai outfit to church?

Speaker 2 Be more. Can I still have a Yamaga? Yes.
Okay, good. If you wear the samurai outfit.
Yeah, I wear the samurai yamaga and two swords. Will you you go to synagogue with me for real? Let's go.

Speaker 2 Not a synagogue. Why not? Oh, with the Yamaga? You said you.
Yeah. No, I want to go to a Christian church with a Yamaka.
Let's go to both. But let's not wear the Yamaka for the Jewish one.

Speaker 2 No, I think we wear the Yamaka. No Christian.
We wear Buddhist monk robes. Buddhist monk robes at the fucking.

Speaker 2 Well, we better start growing our pubes out. Oh, yeah.
Isn't that a whole thing with Buddhist monks? Yeah. What is this?

Speaker 2 All right, this guy got pulled over and he had to call his girlfriend to convince her that it was the truth because she thought he was lying. Oh, God.
Joel got pulled over. over.

Speaker 2 He's on his way home now. Damn.
What do I got to lie about?

Speaker 2 He's not lying. He got pulled over.
He's good to go, though. Jesus.
Thank you. I don't understand.
Rewind. I don't understand what's going on.

Speaker 2 This young kid got pulled over by the cops, and his girlfriend thought he was full of shit. And so he had the cop FaceTime her.
Yeah. That's fucking hilarious.
I don't understand. Tell me.

Speaker 2 That's a black guy, and that's the cop that pulled him over. And then what is he saying to who's that? That's little Yachty.

Speaker 2 Okay. And who?

Speaker 2 That's Lil Yachty, and that's Officer Wackadoo. And who else? Who is he talking to on the phone? Girlfriend.

Speaker 2 And what is he saying to his girlfriend on the phone? She doesn't believe he got pulled over. She thinks he's full of shit.
He's out doing something. Oh, it's because of pussy.

Speaker 2 She thinks that he's out getting pulled over. Yeah, he thinks he's out.
He's playing again now, again. You can use this.
Okay, go here.

Speaker 2 He's not lying. He got pulled over.
He's good to go, though. Jesus.
You had to get like the whitest nerd cop, too. It's like,

Speaker 2 he did it. I pulled him over.
He looked like George. Yeah.
I saw him driving while black, and I had to pull him over.

Speaker 2 What'd you want to be? Hello, Tanisha. It's me.

Speaker 2 Officer Dosen. I pulled him over.
I saw him flying in that scat pack or that Hellcat, zooming down the road. I had to pull him over.
And I said, how could you afford this?

Speaker 2 These fucking guys. He gets like the whitest nerd fucking cop.
Yeah, it's real. I pulled over your boyfriend, Tanisha.
He had to get him. Anyway, he's good to go.

Speaker 2 But he had to explain to him what was going on, right? To the cop? Yeah.

Speaker 2 My girl thinks I'm hooking up right now. Yeah, by the way, he didn't pan out to show the girl that's already in his car with him

Speaker 2 It is a girl that is she holding it. Yeah, she's filming he's filming the whole thing His side piece is filming the whole fucking thing.
Yeah, that you know

Speaker 2 Oh, I've got a clip, but just let me talk about this for yeah

Speaker 2 Do you want to be with a woman that's paranoid like that though?

Speaker 2 Well, no, how would you right? You're constantly going

Speaker 2 I know dudes that have to do that. Well, you know what we talked about this yesterday? Yeah.
I talked about when someone says

Speaker 2 would your it was like would your wife let you go go? Because, you know, I'm going to Scotland this year. Yeah.
And a friend said,

Speaker 2 could never. I said, well, look, I don't have kids.
So it's not like I'm saying to her, hey, can you stay with the kids while I go to Scotland? It's me saying, I want to go to Scotland.

Speaker 2 And she goes, you should go. My buddy goes, my wife would never let me.
I said, do you have kids? No. I said, what do you mean she wouldn't let you go somewhere?

Speaker 2 She just doesn't, she wouldn't, she'd be like, either I'm going or you're not going alone. And I was like, you

Speaker 2 get out of that relationship. I don't understand.
Dude, but millions of people are like that. Millions of people have demands.
Look, if you're sharing responsibility of children, different story.

Speaker 2 Can I just say something?

Speaker 2 I'm so glad you brought this up. Please.
All right, see, here's the deal, okay?

Speaker 2 When I used to play video games, right? It was like a day ago.

Speaker 2 Two weeks ago. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I haven't done it in two weeks. Oh, you said that.
I'm trying to find a new game. You say that.

Speaker 2 Two weeks has been like five days. Oh, whatever.
Yeah. I did it yesterday.
One work week? Yesterday a little bit. Oh, you're right.
Right. So, can I just get back to my point? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 All right. And so when I was with Kalila, right, she'd be like, eight hours is enough.
Right? Well, it's pretty reasonable to play. It's not, it's not.
Eight hours is a lot of it. It's not.
It's not.

Speaker 2 Not the kind of games I play. And I think what you guys are doing right now is you're not educated.

Speaker 2 Okay. You're not educated.
Educate us. Everyone in this room is not educated.
Eight hours is how long people go to work for.

Speaker 2 I understand that, but the thing is, the things I have to do in that eight hours is a lot. Okay.

Speaker 2 There's a lot. I have to, you know what I mean? Rank up.
Rank up. I have to explore caves.
Rank up, dog. I mean, I have to, you know, design my house.
Look at this. I'm okay with it.
Thank you.

Speaker 2 Golf takes a long time to get it. Right.
So my thing was, like, and I and I one day I looked at Kalana and goes, you like the beach, right? She does. She loves it.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 And I go, if you were at the beach for eight hours, I wouldn't be like, hey, eight hours.

Speaker 2 In fact, you could call me and go, listen, for a month, I'm going to go to the Fiji Islands and go deep.

Speaker 2 You want me to pay for it? I don't give a fuck. I don't think you should pay for it.
But I'm just saying.

Speaker 2 But my point is, is that

Speaker 2 I want you to be happy.

Speaker 2 If that's something that you want to do to be happy then i'm going to support it okay but when it comes to video games it's a whole to do i agree with you you're look at this look at me i'm on your are you on my side everyone on my side everyone is thank you but let me say like this the reason it gets a bad rap and you know i'm pro video games yeah the reason it gets a bad rap is because like if i go to play golf and it takes three and a half hours yeah to four that's a long time yeah but it's because i'm leaving And it's separate, but video games gets a bad rap with her because you're in the same house as her, but you're paying no attention to her.

Speaker 2 Get a different apartment. Get a different apartment for video games.

Speaker 2 If you're a guy who loves video games, get a separate apartment for video games. And then you go, I'm going off.
No, but let's be real. Play video games.
Financially. Yeah.
Let's be real.

Speaker 2 That's an insane thing. Yeah.
But there should be a place for people to go to play video games outside of their house collectively in a room. You don't have to talk to each other.

Speaker 2 You just, there's video game consoles there. Should we open up Bobby Lee's getaway? Bobby Lee's video games.
That's really like a man kid. Well, arcades used to exist, but no one does arcades anymore.

Speaker 2 But you can go, we have your own little

Speaker 2 area. In Japan, they're all over the place.
I know. And you can play whatever game you want.
Yep, you don't have to do that. You smoke cigarettes.
You drink cigarettes. We drink Red Bull.

Speaker 2 We sell all kinds of fun candies.

Speaker 2 In

Speaker 2 what's it called? Sherijuku? No, whatever? In Japan? Yeah. What's the one with all the hookers? What's the hooker one? Shibuya.
They literally, you can get hookers to the video game place.

Speaker 2 We do have, okay, upstairs, we do have private rooms. Relaxation rooms.
Relaxation rooms. Right.
For the ones that want to get funky with it. Relaxed.
Yeah. They want to get relaxed.

Speaker 2 We'll have those girls. Yeah.
So

Speaker 2 what else do we have there? At the video game place? It's not a video game place. It's a getaway.
Bobby Lee's getaway. Yeah, man cave getaway.

Speaker 2 Man. No, it doesn't have to be for men.
It's a Bobby Lee's getaway. Well, women can go? Of course they.
Why can't they? Women play video games? It's illegal not to let them in. Oh, it is? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Well, Christians do it when it comes to cakes. For now.

Speaker 2 For now, it's illegal until we change it. Remember that gay couple that was getting married, they went to Colorado and they went to try to get a cake? Yeah.

Speaker 2 And they go, we're not going to serve you because you're gay. Why can't we do that with a man cave? You'll probably get sued in California.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you get sued here. We have to open it up somewhere.
We'll go to Texas. Yes.
They're not going to sue us there.

Speaker 2 Smash burgers we have there. Smash burgers.
Yeah. Fanta grape drinks.
Only grape. Can we get other kinds? Diet.
Diet grape. Okay.
What else do we have there? We have.

Speaker 2 You know what I think we should have? What?

Speaker 2 An indoor trampoline. Just to bounce out some of that energy.
No. Bounce it out.
So much space. What do you mean? Costly? Yeah.

Speaker 2 We bought a fucking, it's a it's 50 000 square feet the place we got no we take we get a gigantic you know the swimming pool out swimming pool with the top um the inflatable swimming pool yeah we put fucking oil in it what yeah so what is imagine nick what is oil or gigantic a vat of oil yeah in a fucking right and you can wrestle

Speaker 2 I don't I don't like this. What? Why? A swimming pool with oil in it? No, it's like an inflatable one.
Oh, a little baby one. Yeah, no, you blow it up, right? Yeah, keep it.
You put oil in it.

Speaker 2 You see how you blow it again. Yeah,

Speaker 2 suck some of it back out just in case. There it is.
Right. And then you, and then you put, you know, if you're Asian, you can use fucking sesame oil, whatever you want.

Speaker 2 Well, it does burn, it burns at a higher rate. No, you're not burning it.
You're wrestling in it. Well, when you're done, you want to cook something.
I'm starving. All right.
We waste

Speaker 2 fucking eyes. All right, right, right, right.
Tip it over and use the fucking idea. I've never got an idea.
You don't think that's a good idea? So am I. Is that a good idea? It's a great idea.

Speaker 2 Thank you. But I am going to cook in it when I'm done with it.
And above it, like one of those disco balls. I've always wanted one of those.
It's so cheesy. Above the fucking.
It's just cheesy.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're right. How about can we get like

Speaker 2 gigantic lava lamps? Yes. That's not cheesy.
No. And you know what I want? Dildos all over the place.
No, why? Just in case somebody needs one. Right.
They're there in case you need them.

Speaker 2 Don't use them, but if you need it, it's like in case of emergency, break.

Speaker 2 And then we have. In case of emergency, break ass.
And then downstairs,

Speaker 2 we have a bad room.

Speaker 2 If you've been a bad boy. Careful.
What? Careful, what? Bad boy?

Speaker 2 What's going on down there? Very, very bad boy. What's going on down there? Lots of things.
You're being a bad boy? If you want me to be?

Speaker 2 But downstairs is... Like a BDSM room? I don't know.
What is this? Now you're a boom mic on

Speaker 2 the bottom.

Speaker 2 What? What are you doing? Oh, yeah, like the scene in pulp fiction. Is that what's going on down there? Yeah, but not with the blood.
It's not going to get violent. One of the best scenes.

Speaker 2 One of the best scenes. And that, the gimp, was my favorite.
Yeah. And then the guy that plays, what, Z? What's his name?

Speaker 2 Zed. Zed.
Zed's dead, baby. I yelled at him once in the Our.

Speaker 2 Was he talking? No, he was completely passed out. And I snapped.
I go, Zed.

Speaker 2 He got up. I go, what the fuck, dude? I saw your movie.
Yeah. Something like that.
And he was like, well, that guy. Peter Green.
Peter Green, great talented guy. What's he up to? What a great.

Speaker 2 What's Peter up to today?

Speaker 2 Can we find out on his IMDB?

Speaker 2 We should get him on Bad Friends.

Speaker 2 I love that guy.

Speaker 2 What's he doing right now? Upcoming? He's got a lot going on. Holy shit.
This kid's working a lot.

Speaker 2 Working last year, yeah. Yeah, that always makes me emotional.
When I see people with 30 upcomings, and I'm like, wow. I went on a date with a girl, and she said she has never seen pulp fiction.

Speaker 2 Is that a red flag? 100%. To me, it is.
I have no business with you. Is that a red flag? How old is she? Exactly.

Speaker 2 32? Red flag. Wait a minute.
If you, I don't give a fuck if she's 25. She should know pulp fiction.
Never seen it.

Speaker 2 Pulp fiction. I know.
Yeah, that's a breakup. Well, she never seen Raising Arizona.

Speaker 2 That's understandable. That was much older.
Right. She never saw Tenon Bombs or Rushmore.
Much older. I got it.
Okay. She never saw Reservation.

Speaker 2 But then when I said pulp fiction, she goes, never seen it. And I go, it's such an iconic movie.

Speaker 2 It's just, it's just, it's an iconic movie. It's like in the social site, guys.
It's like saying, I bet you a 20-year-old still knows who the Beatles are. You know what I mean? Yeah, it exists beyond.

Speaker 2 It's It's something you should know. Yeah, pulp fiction for sure.
So if you're listening, lady, you know who I'm talking about. Watch it.
Watch it now. Next time I see you.

Speaker 2 Oh, so before the next time you see her, you better have it. Yeah, you better have watched it.
And you get some of the lines. I want you to memorize some of the lines.
Yeah. It's really just a.

Speaker 2 I mean, raise your hand if you think it's a great movie. What? It's not even a.
I was just wondering what. It's like an afterthought.
Hey, let's move on. Have you seen this trailer? No.

Speaker 2 Please, what's this trailer? Oh, I don't think our building takes pets.

Speaker 2 Hello? What? Hello.

Speaker 2 You want a cat?

Speaker 2 I own fire brands. They like shoot.
Yeah, keep the changer. Let's do this.

Speaker 2 How are you doing?

Speaker 2 Wait a minute.

Speaker 2 When does this come out?

Speaker 2 Was it in the theater or something? Yeah. I want to see how much this made.
Nine lives. Well, look at

Speaker 2 the way. Rod Tomatoes.
See what Roden Tomatoes was. Jennifer Gardner.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Cheryl Hines. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Christopher fucking walking.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Huge.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Budget was 30 million and it made $6 million.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. And by the way, when it says 30 million.
Yeah. Oh, this says domestic worldwide.
It made 57.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but but

Speaker 2 broke even. Broke even.
Not even. No way.

Speaker 2 Give me the rotten tomatoes.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 2 All right, I take it back a little bit. I do love Chris of Walker.
I just don't like that. No, but I just don't like that everyone's.
Not bad. No, not bad.
14%.

Speaker 2 That's about what some of my movies are. Your movie's range is.
Yeah, my movie range. 41%.

Speaker 2 It's kind of where I'm. We're not going to do your movie now.

Speaker 2 No, no, he was making fun of me. No, I don't care.
I don't like your smug fucking. We're not doing your movie, dude.

Speaker 2 I, what? I, I, I, you have

Speaker 2 the reviews. Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 I take it back. I love Chris Walken.
I just, I just, you know what it is? Yeah. I just don't like that.
Everyone does an impression. I know.

Speaker 2 That's my, it's just too many people.

Speaker 2 It's just too many people doing the impression. Can you do it? Everyone can.
Everyone can. To some degree.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I'm Christopher Walken.
Right.

Speaker 2 Hello, this watch up his ass. Like everyone has

Speaker 2 a version of it.

Speaker 2 All right. Thank you for being a bad friend.