Taste Our Rainbow

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 Sacra. Sacramento.
Sacramento. California.
We're on tour and we've got a couple days left. Sacramento, California.
Sacramento, Long Beach. Long Beach? Windsor, Ontario.
No, Windsor, Ontario.

Speaker 1 Oh, Canada? Then where else in Canada? Niagara. Niagara Falls.
Ontario Carolyn. Tucson.
And then Tucson, Arizona. And where do we finish the tour? Vegas.
420 and 20. I can't wait for that one.

Speaker 1 Badfriendspod.com is where you're going to get those tickets. Badfriendspod.com.
We also have Bad Friends Merch.com.

Speaker 1 And also, exclusive content, McConnell Boney McConney is up there putting a bunch of stuff up from the tour. You also have bonus content available on the Patreon.
Go to patreon.com slash.

Speaker 1 Congratulations to everyone involved. Congratulations.

Speaker 1 Go to badfriendspod.com. Thank you.
You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

Speaker 1 White dude and an Asian dude.

Speaker 1 You two are disgusting.

Speaker 1 You two or something. We're bad friends.

Speaker 1 Before we begin, I want to say this, okay? Okay. Me and Andrew had many discussions about this.

Speaker 1 And we just thought when your name came up to do it, Home Run. Not Home Run.
We laughed for four hours straight.

Speaker 1 Just the thought of you makes us laugh. So I just wrote the song for you.
Oh, yeah. La la la.

Speaker 1 Craig Agop.

Speaker 1 I like your eyebrows.

Speaker 1 One is thicker than the other one,

Speaker 1 which is weird. No.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Really? No.
Okay. Rosie cheeks.
He's got rosy cheeks. I eat rosacea.
Curly hair. What? Yeah.
No, just let us finish the conversation. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let us sing.

Speaker 1 Do you have rosacea? What's rosacea? I get red. I guess I ate something spicy once, and between that and the stress-up horribly funny, I just turned red for like three months straight.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Your whole body or just your face? Just my face.
Yeah, yeah. I ate something spicy once.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Impossible. That's impossible.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah yeah so you ate salsa one time well it was like like mexican salsa from like a oh hey hey hey hey hey carniaria carnia sauce carniaria no we have mexicans here whoa

Speaker 1 do you want to introduce him and oh yeah so um uh let me do a little history yeah do a little bit of a history i don't know how he got my number i don't know how that stop i know

Speaker 1 stop amazing god your cheeks dude i just want to grab them i want to grab them aggressively right? And I just want to go on your face.

Speaker 1 I really do. So anyway, um

Speaker 1 go ahead. So, um, dude, did you steal those from Santa? Those cheeks?

Speaker 1 Dude, those are so rosy. He stole them from Santa.
Holy shit. Have you seen the photos of Santa? Say ho, ho, ho, real fast.
Ho, ho, ho. Well, that's not Santa.
I will take over if you make me laugh.

Speaker 1 I realize. All right, stop.
I'm not done. I'm not done with the intro.
Thank you so much for doing this, by the way. I love you so much.
But my point is, is this.

Speaker 1 I don't know how you got my number, but you know, years ago, you started calling me to do your shows. He does a show called Horribly Funny.
It's a wonderful show. It's a wonderful show.

Speaker 1 It's probably the best

Speaker 1 bring-a-room. Is that? It's not a bring-a-room.
No, promoted show. Outside Booker.
So in L.A., right, we have about four or five guys that are outside promoters.

Speaker 1 And they have their, well, they use the same people. Let's be honest.
Yeah, they do. Yeah, yeah.
It's you and me. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I know, I know. Yeah.
And then you always get Arsinio, but that he gets Arsino all the time.

Speaker 1 Right? And then who hasn't aged,

Speaker 1 like, he looks the same as he did when you did, ooh, ooh. He really does.
It's a little creepy. He's a little creepy.
He looks young.

Speaker 1 Anyway, he's the best promoter, but every time we're backstage and I look at you, you're always in a puddle of sweat. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're just a bundle of nerves and you don't know how to relax. Yeah, yeah.
And I ask you questions back there.

Speaker 1 You make him so nervous. I know.
What do you make him nervous?

Speaker 1 Who makes you more nervous, me or Andrew?

Speaker 1 Bobby, There's no one that makes me more nervous than you back there. Andrew, like, shows up 15 minutes early.

Speaker 1 He's peaceful and just doesn't. Wait, wait, wait.
You're great. He's peaceful?

Speaker 1 It's like he's meditating.

Speaker 1 Oh, so he's like Namaste. Yeah.
Right. And I'm chaos.
And I had to wrestle Ornie Adams, like, you know,

Speaker 1 so that he doesn't go on stage because you didn't want him watching you.

Speaker 1 Wait, wait a minute. Ornie Adams didn't want to watch Bobby? No.
Bobby didn't want Ornie Adams to watch him. Oh, right.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know why? Why? He's judgy. Oh.

Speaker 1 And I don't like Judgy.

Speaker 1 Oh, you don't want him to see your material then say something? No, I just don't want him to be there. I love him as a human.
Oh, right. I just don't want him to watch.
No watch to you.

Speaker 1 Does he want to watch you? What does he care about watching you? He likes to watch me.

Speaker 1 And I say no. But anyway,

Speaker 1 so out of all the comics you hire, I'm the one that stresses it the most.

Speaker 1 Is it because I'm the only one that really asks you questions about life? Well, that too. But honestly, you also make me the most happy.

Speaker 1 Like, whenever I text and you actually respond, I get the zoomies.

Speaker 1 Like a dog. Yeah.
I don't know what to do with myself. Like, you run around.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, wow. It's like the part in Black Swan where I just hold my phone against my chest and drop to my knees.
You know, it seems. Is that the right movie? It seems sexual.
No, no, no. No, no.

Speaker 1 You're not sexually attractive. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Wait, would you mean no, no, no. Too many.

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 he's not attractive at all? No, he's very attractive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah. But I'm not your type.
No, it's not that. It's just I'm very grateful and lucky to be working with you.

Speaker 1 You're worth every text. You know, I text you so many times to get a response.
And I just.

Speaker 1 You're that, Andre? I'm worth every text. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Every non-response, when you finally do respond. Yeah.
Oh.

Speaker 1 I was getting a little personal. I'm not different experiences.
Yeah. I'm going to put that on your tombstone.
What? Worth every text. Not me.
I am really worth every text. Yeah.
Yeah, you know that.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Yeah, you do.
Yeah, you do, though. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Don't act shy and cold. I'm prompt.
I'm on time. I'm always nice.
I always say, hey, thank you. And then I leave immediately after my set.
I get out of the green room. I don't take any air.

Speaker 1 You take a lot of air. May I? Yeah.
That sounds like you should. I'm late.
Never, never. Then what the fuck? Well, it's, it's.

Speaker 1 I'm always early is what he's saying. I know, but am I.
You're always early too. But like,

Speaker 1 it's getting you there. It's getting you there.
That's it. Getting me there.
What do you mean? How many times has he canceled? How many times has he canceled? On me, believe it or not, zero. Wow.

Speaker 1 You think it's zero?

Speaker 1 Who's canceled more, him or me?

Speaker 1 No. He has.
No, it was an accident.

Speaker 1 Oh, but stop? Yes. But he has.
I've never canceled. He just said it was an accident.
No, no, no. It was like a miscommunication of booking.
It doesn't matter. No, I've never canceled.

Speaker 1 No, he hasn't canceled. I've never canceled.

Speaker 1 But he had been booked, and

Speaker 1 he wasn't there. No, that's not true.
I I knew early, and

Speaker 1 I did it.

Speaker 1 You did.

Speaker 1 You did it. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Say your name properly. It's Greg Agop.
Agop? I call you a goop.

Speaker 1 We call you the goop over here. The goop over here.
No way.

Speaker 1 Well, your new name for this show is the goop, the goop dog. I think it's the goop dog.
Well, you're a goop. You're goop over.
I love dog. You know, he's like a dog.
I love dog.

Speaker 1 One day I will be able to take care of one, but for now, I'm just taking care of me, which is hard. What do you mean? What do you mean?

Speaker 1 It takes a lot to take care of him. He has fucking a thousand animals.
He can take care of animals. You're fine.
You can. My for you page is all puppies and Bobby Lee.

Speaker 1 What? Is that on your dating profile as well? Do you say that to people?

Speaker 1 My FYP is Bobby Lee and puppies. They're the things that make, I think, not just me, but lots of people very happy.
I agree. Look, both these things are wonderful.
Stop kissing his ass. It's enough.

Speaker 1 Oh, I had enough.

Speaker 1 Okay, so how about this then? Okay. Okay.

Speaker 1 What are you? I'm ethnicity one. Lebanese.
And no. Okay.
My mom.

Speaker 1 What? What is that? Your mom's like... I've always wanted to know.
I never know. I don't know.
Okay. I don't know either, but like...
Yeah, you do know. Yeah, I do know.
Okay, so why'd you say that?

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 My mother

Speaker 1 was born in Lebanon. My father was born in Syria.

Speaker 1 Oh, so you're just

Speaker 1 lived in Lebanon.

Speaker 1 I'm Armenian, so I'm just as lost as you are. So wait, you're Armenian.
Your mother's. So Syrian and Lebanese.
That's what you are. You're Syrian and Lebanese.
Yeah. Can I ask a question?

Speaker 1 Sir's question. I feel like if you were raised in that area and you were still there, that you maybe wouldn't have survived.
No.

Speaker 1 No, I'm too bougie for that. No, I just think something would.

Speaker 1 Something would have happened. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I feel like they would have got you.

Speaker 1 You would open up a paper bag on the side of the road, something would have happened. Something would have got you.
Boom.

Speaker 1 I didn't say that. Yeah.
No. Yeah, yeah.
Honestly, yeah, I'm glad I'm not there. I'm not going anywhere.
I feel like you're like a kebab. I'm a vegetarian.
Are you just a sleeper agent?

Speaker 1 Are you a sleeper agent?

Speaker 1 When you do zingers, you gotta come.

Speaker 1 You gotta come clean. You gotta come clean.
Say it clean. Yeah.
You can't stumble on.

Speaker 1 But they do.

Speaker 1 You have to say, are you a sleeper agent? Or give it to Carlos. Yeah, yeah.
Give it to him. Write it down and they give it to him.

Speaker 1 Anyway. Wait a minute.
You're a vegetarian. Yeah.
Are you single?

Speaker 1 Single vegetarian? Can I just say that? I don't understand.

Speaker 1 Are you a single vegetarian?

Speaker 1 i stopped eating meat because i'm miley cyrus all right why i want to say

Speaker 1 hold on did she tell you not to eat meat anymore well i was really high at a miley cyrus concert twice and she just said we need to stop eating our friends and i'm like when uh once in in new york city okay at terminal five and then at the woltern theater in la

Speaker 1 and then i just replaced

Speaker 1 I replaced all the meat for cheese and then I'm like gained 60 pounds. Scoop dog.
I went from not eating bread to just eating bread. Yeah.
And yeah, I'm.

Speaker 1 You went from meat to cheese and you gained 60 pounds. Yeah.
In what span of time?

Speaker 1 Probably two years. Oh, that's not that bad.
Okay. Yeah, and then I just keep going.
So how long have you been a vegetarian? Since 2015. Right.
So could I just ask you something?

Speaker 1 And I don't want to be mean.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 I don't want to do it. Ask.

Speaker 1 Ask. You must eat a lot of vegetables.
No, I don't eat any vegetables. I love chips.
I love chippy. Oh, I see.
That's what chippies. is.
So you're a vegetarian. No vegetables.

Speaker 1 Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night because I thought I heard a bag of Doritos.

Speaker 1 Oh, but that's vegetarian. You're more of a carbitarian.

Speaker 1 I literally...

Speaker 1 I buy the vegetables.

Speaker 1 You're a carbitarian. Dude, this is so good.
That's the best lug I've ever ever done. You're a carbitarian.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's okay.
Because you're not eating meat.

Speaker 1 And I agree with this, by the way. I understand this because meat can affect people very negatively.
It gives people cancer.

Speaker 1 i eat meat but i'm trying to cut down on bad boy meat like hamburgers bad boy meat right red meat bad boy meat i'm trying to eat fish and chicken i thought you're gonna say fish and chips i'm not eating you can have my chips i'll just eat the fish so you don't eat fish either

Speaker 1 i i can't touch it i can't cook it but i i'm open to it more because you can't pet fish but like cows are so dumb

Speaker 1 you know

Speaker 1 you could

Speaker 1 you could pet a fish if you caught it if you caught a fish you can pet it

Speaker 1 you don't want to what about i don't want want to pet a fish. What about people that have a fish as pets? I actually don't.
Like, when they, there are places where you could pet starfish.

Speaker 1 That's gross. That's gross.
Pretty gross. Yeah.
Okay, so I need to. Hold on.
Before we move forward.

Speaker 1 What is your meal day consists of? Because then if you don't eat vegetables and you don't want no meat, no veggies, where's protein coming from? It can't be from Doritos. Jeez.

Speaker 1 It only has a limited amount of protein in it. I literally, if I could have chips for every meal, they have every flavor in chips.
What was breakfast today?

Speaker 1 Today, I was going to die since like yesterday. So, like, today I've had a bagel and I don't usually eat bagels, but it has cinnamon and raisins in it, so it's sweet.
So, I like

Speaker 1 give me one day of meals. Yesterday, like breakfast, lunch, dinner.
I like eggs. So, you had eggs in the morning? And I always Uber Eats or DoorDash.
I don't cook because I hate it. Right here.

Speaker 1 Right here. Yeah.
I do this. Every meal.
I do the same thing. I'm the same.
And I don't even feel bad anymore. Like, I don't even look.
And you know what? I think it's more cost-effective. It is.

Speaker 1 It really is because, like, I order groceries whenever, like, you know, once a month, and I literally just throw them right away.

Speaker 1 I have lots of vegetables in my fridge that I'm going to be throwing away in a week. But, like, I won't even open it.
Wait. Wait, wait.
So in the morning, you have eggs. Just eggs.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then what happens at lunch? It's DoorDash time. Or chips.
Oh, DoorDash time. Yeah.
It's,

Speaker 1 you know, there's lots of pizzas. There's, there's, Mexican food is easy to switch.
There's just, you know. What's your favorite dinner to have? Yeah.

Speaker 1 It used to be barbecue, but I do like barbecue sauce. You could put barbecue sauce on salad and still, you know, get the...

Speaker 1 So you're putting barbecue sauce on romaine lettuce? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. There's baked...

Speaker 1 There's Beyond Chicken. No, Chicken Impossible.
That sounds like a

Speaker 1 show. It is Chicken Impossible.

Speaker 1 So do you know what you've ever had for dinner? Do you know what you've ever had? What have you had for dinner last night? What was dinner? Last night.

Speaker 1 Oh, I like, you know. It's not what you like.
What did you have?

Speaker 1 Do you know what you did? Honestly, I've been like freaking out about today for

Speaker 1 you.

Speaker 1 Well, let me say this. Let me cut you off.
Yeah. First of all, we love you to death.
I think

Speaker 1 you're a stand-up guy. You're so fun.
And you're very nice. And you put together great shows.
And you're great to work with. You're responsive.
You're smart. You're sweet.
You're cool.

Speaker 1 You're the best outside promoter I've ever worked with. No.
Outside of that, you're just a great guy. Great guy.
And I'm saying this, I'm being genuine. We love you.

Speaker 1 We have you on the show because we love you. Don't be nervous.
We just want to have fun with you. But we adore you.
You're such a wonderful human being. Your energy is.

Speaker 1 You know, if someone says, like, you have an aura around you, you have all the colors. Whoa.
You're the entire fucking rainbow. There's some colors missing.
Huh? There's some colors missing.

Speaker 1 Which ones?

Speaker 1 I mean, he's not aggressive.

Speaker 1 He's a color. There's no black.
There's no black. But there's no black on the rainbow.
Oh, right, right. That's true.
Yeah, there's no black.

Speaker 1 You're a fucking color.

Speaker 1 The rainbow colors, you have all of them. You have all the rainbows.
Thank you. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Can you feel that in your soul? Because you're a good human being. That's way too kind and way too overwhelming.

Speaker 1 I made it worse. Somehow.
No, no, no. I was going to make it easy.
No, no, no, no. No.

Speaker 1 You know, one of my favorite things to do ever is

Speaker 1 have an edible, and then I like to turn off the lights. And then I like to eat sour Skittles in the dark with my eyes closed.

Speaker 1 And sometimes I suck too hard. But like, I have tasted the rainbow and it's pretty awesome.
Like, but then you have to know when to stop. Because if not, you'll get cold sores in your mouth.

Speaker 1 But that's like my favorite thing to do. And anything could be playing in the background.

Speaker 1 Taste the rainbow tonight. I don't know what it is.
But it has to be sour. You get high, you eat Skittles, you get cold sores.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you don't stop. Like, if you don't stop.
So you have to. This is you tasting the rainbow.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's amazing.
What do you mean don't stop?

Speaker 1 Just a regular bag of Skittles is not that many Skittles. I know, but like, first I started with the regular Skittles, which come in the mini bags.

Speaker 1 And then I started eating the whole whole sour Skittles. And then one day I'm just like, it's still early.
Let's do a second bag of Skittles.

Speaker 1 And then I woke up the next morning and I couldn't move my mouth.

Speaker 1 But it was too sore.

Speaker 1 So like I couldn't even have water.

Speaker 1 Know when to stop.

Speaker 1 Craig, how are you alive? Taste the rainbow. How do you live? Let's do the new phrase.
Hey, new phrase for Skittles. Taste the rainbow.

Speaker 1 Know when to stop.

Speaker 1 In moderation. In moderation.
Everything in moderation. Yeah.
So, do you do that nightly?

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 that. No, I had to stop because honestly, like, my mouth was going to fall apart.
Yeah, yeah. So now

Speaker 1 special treats.

Speaker 1 So can I ask? How old are you? Oh, I'm going to stick with 27 because honestly, people, that's what I've been saying since I was 27. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. And how many years have you been saying it?

Speaker 1 10? I'm 27. You're 27.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So you really don't want to tell us your real age.

Speaker 1 Wait, why does it? Why, why?

Speaker 1 I'm 40. Bob's bob's 52 52

Speaker 1 i could get away with like just more if i was younger what do you mean get away with what do you look at me get away with have you committed crimes no so what do you think you're getting away with you you're a young looking guy you look healthy you have nice skin good hair let me see your teeth smile

Speaker 1 has skittles taken care of

Speaker 1 yeah have you lost a few no let me see you look at you i don't smile with teeth Let me just show me. No.
Show me your teeth. Just show me teeth.
Like this. No.
Why, Why? My dentist.

Speaker 1 This is like me trying to get my child to brush their teeth at night.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 This guy used to do stand-up. How long did you do stand-up for? Many years.
Actually, I was freaking out so much today. My brother sent me a video of me doing stand-up.

Speaker 1 I feel like that part of me's died, but

Speaker 1 I thought I would hate it. watching it, but I liked it a lot.

Speaker 1 I'm sure you're so funny. It was the work ethic that kind of I carried on into horribly funny.
Yeah, but your work ethic as a producer is incredible.

Speaker 1 If you you just did that as a how long did you do how many years do you do comedy i started in in 2000 and uh i think uh 16 probably okay and then you went for how long a couple years yeah and then i i probably i started horribly funny in 2017 at the lyric hyperion which you're you're you're at okay yeah

Speaker 1 okay uh yeah and then uh i and then uh uh did the lodge room and then when i finally got horribly funny into the comedy store full-time that's when i had to stop comedy because i was i burnt myself out.

Speaker 1 How many years is that? Two? No, probably

Speaker 1 math. Oh,

Speaker 1 2016, 2017, 2018. Which of these years did it start? One more.
2019. Maybe one more.
2020. Right before the pandemic? Yeah, probably that.
So you did about four years of stand-up, give or take. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, probably, yeah, three to four years. Okay.

Speaker 1 Is your family here in Los Angeles? Oh, no.

Speaker 1 They're literally all dead.

Speaker 1 But except my brothers.

Speaker 1 Your dude was up. Bro.

Speaker 1 Bro, bro. Wait, that was out of pocket there.
Stop it. That's sunny.
Carlos.

Speaker 1 It was just the unexpected.

Speaker 1 Obviously, they're dead. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's how I get to eat Skittles indoor dad.

Speaker 1 I'm literally like, you know,

Speaker 1 family

Speaker 1 is still alive? Mom and dad are gone. Dad died last November.
This November. Oh, shit.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 How, how?

Speaker 1 How? Oh, you guys aren't going to like it. Oh, I guess it was a mixture between

Speaker 1 heart complications and COVID and

Speaker 1 something else. I think it was like another thing that was mixed into that.
Was he a vegetarian?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 No. No, no.
No.

Speaker 1 I'm going to die soon, too. That's why like everyone.

Speaker 1 Every horse. Don't say that.
I freak out too much, though.

Speaker 1 That's why I brought you onto the show, okay? Because we want to help you navigate. We want you to relax and just have a different outlook and just approach things a little differently.

Speaker 1 You're not going to die on our own. You're not going to die on our.

Speaker 1 Have you been to the doctor recently?

Speaker 1 I could, I could talk, never actually. I've gotten away with not going to the doctor.
You've never been. I don't know if you're getting away with it.
No.

Speaker 1 Well, here's the thing. When we were young,

Speaker 1 the doctor, the family doctor said that our mother was sick because we were fat. And then

Speaker 1 was this a doctor herself? It was an Armenian doctor, which is equivalent to a dog doctor. Right.
He's dead too.

Speaker 1 He's dead too. She's dead, yeah.
She's dead. All right, so hold on, back it up.
Your father passed away and we're very sorry about that.

Speaker 1 Bobby's dad is dead as well. My dad died died.
Were you guys close? You know,

Speaker 1 we could have been closer. Okay.
But, but yeah,

Speaker 1 but basically my upbringing was super weird. Family moved from, not weird.
It's a lot weird. We they moved from Lebanon or and they just we lived in like there was four apartments in a house.

Speaker 1 So like my whole family kind of lived there, like 13 people.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 slowly they, you know, know started dying so like so like it almost looks like we did it on purpose or something it's like nine of them are dead or 10 of them it's just me and my brothers and a cousin left but like also before one of the horribly funnies one of my aunts died in my arms and then i had to go like literally the same night to and like it was uh theo vaughn was on that night and natasha ledgero and mosha captured no no no no i was i was that's insane yeah no no no no i'm like lifting her head up it's going back down oh so she died literally died in your arms.

Speaker 1 How old was this woman? God knows how old anyone is. Probably 27 or 27.

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Speaker 1 Wait a minute, Craig.

Speaker 1 So hold on. Were you at her house?

Speaker 1 We all live.

Speaker 1 Okay, so this is the call.

Speaker 1 She calls you. I think I'm dying.
Yeah. Really? Yeah, it was my brother calling.
I think she's dying. Let's say, let's play it out.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Ring, ring. Hello?

Speaker 1 Sweetie? Yeah? It's your aunt.

Speaker 1 Hello. I'm dying.
Okay, I'll be right there. Right.
So you go up there. And then what? Damn.
I'm leading. Oh, down.
She used to live up there now.

Speaker 1 It doesn't matter. Does it fucking matter? It kind of does because it could have fell down.
All right, all right.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 after it happened. Forget it.
Anyway, and then you walked into her place No luckily she wasn't feeling well So my brother said oh, hey, I'm gonna go for one minute.

Speaker 1 Can you keep an eye out on her until I get back? We're gonna take her to the hospital.

Speaker 1 And of course, with my luck, you know, I'm like, you know, talking to her, making her laugh, and then like her head just falled down.

Speaker 1 And then I'm like, wake up, or I'm gonna call 911. And hello.

Speaker 1 And then I keep like bringing up her head and it keeps falling her down. What? And then, wake up or I'm gonna call 911.

Speaker 1 Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Yeah. So

Speaker 1 is it the building? Does it have asbestos in it? Is everyone dying because of the building? Black mold. Is the building dating? I don't know, but you still live there.

Speaker 1 I live there. Now.
I live there alone. We got to get you out.
No, I like it. I have

Speaker 1 to pretty much. You live in a

Speaker 1 four-floored apartment by yourself the whole time? No, no, I had to. They wouldn't let me live in the house by myself.
So I moved to one of the apartments. And, you know.
Who's they? My brothers.

Speaker 1 Okay. So how many

Speaker 1 brothers do you have? Two. And so your mother passed away how long ago? Oh, she had MS.
Oh, fuck.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't remember. So your mother passed away a long time ago.
Your father's past.

Speaker 1 And are your brothers and you close? Yeah, yeah. Okay, so they're the ones that get you through.
Yeah. But did they think that you're the

Speaker 1 next?

Speaker 1 Next? No, they, I mean, do they, are they, what I'm saying is, are your brothers worried about you all? Like, yeah, but they also know that, like, you know,

Speaker 1 they're not going to be able to get me to, like, go on walks. Sometimes they trick me, like, like, they tricked me into going to the park the other day.
How do they trick you?

Speaker 1 Skittles?

Speaker 1 No, coffee.

Speaker 1 Coffee, but I can't have coffee either. I have to do decaf.
And, you know, why? Because of this. Because, you know, I had to, yeah,

Speaker 1 you know, I didn't want to, because I didn't want to freak people out backstage with being nervous. Oh, wait a minute, but coffee makes you nervous.
Yeah, everything makes me nervous.

Speaker 1 Well, how can we get you not nervous? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I guess I don't know. This is an invasive question, but I feel like we love you and we're getting closer.
Do you, can you come a little bit more? If you come, look. I'm on Lexapro.
You can't come. No.

Speaker 1 I've already asked them questions like that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I, and, and, I mean, because I think maybe coming asexual. I think you're asexual.
I'm just not interested in putting myself out there. But you like pussy.
Yeah. I just don't like.

Speaker 1 I don't like that,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 I just don't want to

Speaker 1 be hurt. You don't want to be hurt.
You are a rock star. No, I'm not.
Yes. I'm a comedian.
I'm, I think, like, people ask, like, you know, I have options.

Speaker 1 As a promoter, half my job is to keep my pants on. The other half is to, you know,

Speaker 1 book, book great shows with.

Speaker 1 I don't think that's the first half. I don't, I don't think that's a good question.
I don't think so. I think the first half would be book a good show.
Yeah. Okay.
Book a good show.

Speaker 1 Keep your pants on and we're ready to go. But like, I'm, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm out of shape.
I don't take care of myself. I don't like comfort.
That's a self-esteem issue. Oh, that to start with.

Speaker 1 But also, like, when you do the math, I'm really

Speaker 1 at the moment, I'm really happy alone. Like, I'm really happy.

Speaker 1 Like, if they're, I'm like, at night, I sleep considering a dog, and I'm just like, I just don't want anything breathing in the house, which sounds bad, but like, I just don't want responsibility.

Speaker 1 I don't want liability. You know, I don't like sharing things.
It's not going to work with me. I think I've made myself too comfortable.
Okay, but as a 27-year-old man,

Speaker 1 oh, now it's

Speaker 1 because we know it's a lie.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I asked if you trips on it.
Do you ever masturbate? Uh

Speaker 1 I think you need to come. Greg, I think you need to come.
And I mean this, I don't need to backed up. I think you don't need to go out with look, you don't need to have you can be being singles.

Speaker 1 There's nothing wrong with living. Yeah, I'm single, dude.
Yeah. There's not, there's no one judging that.
But I'm saying, like, for your mental and

Speaker 1 physical health of your brain and body, you do need to come. You probably, I think you need to come.
A little bit. Once in a while.

Speaker 1 Like a doctor.

Speaker 1 No, no. Wait, because it burns? No.

Speaker 1 When you come, does it burn? You don't enjoy it. You don't like it.
Honestly, and that's, you know what? I take it all back. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I want you to do whatever makes you comfortable. Okay.
I do think your jitteriness may be relieved by a little bit of tension relief. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I really don't know. Okay, let's move on then.
I feel like you're not. No, no,

Speaker 1 we don't want to make you feel uncomfortable at all. I'm just curious if I want you to be more relaxed in life.

Speaker 1 Because I feel like when I walk in the back room there, you're going to have an aneurysm. I feel like you're so nervous that, and I'm like, you got to chill.
Everything's going to be.

Speaker 1 Well, Andrew, Andrew, you've done such a good job. So it's like I went to Polly's Christmas party.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I go up, I look through the window just to see who's there. And I see Harlan, some bunch of people, and I see this guy sitting on the couch.
Yeah. Like he's like with his both hands like this.

Speaker 1 And I stared at him for like three minutes. He wasn't talking to anybody.
He was just sitting there with his rosy cheeks. Right.

Speaker 1 And then when I came into the party, you didn't move from that position at all. You were there for hours.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But I was talking to Harlan and some of the other comics before.
Oh, okay. Yeah, I was there early.
I was there early because I had to leave early. Oh, that's right.
I remember.

Speaker 1 What are your hobbies? I go to a lot of

Speaker 1 festivals, lots of concerts. Music.
Music. Yeah.
Okay, great.

Speaker 1 What do you like? What kind of music do you like? I love Miley Cyrus. I love the killers.

Speaker 1 I love Imagine Dragons. Everything people don't like.

Speaker 1 I think Dragons. What do you mean? Who doesn't like Miley Cyrus? Who doesn't like the Killers?

Speaker 1 Samtown is one of my favorite novels of all time. I love Myton.
So Miley Cyrus, The Killers, Imagine Dragons. who else?

Speaker 1 Nelly Burtado. Love, I'm Like a Bird.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I love pop and like rock music. You know,

Speaker 1 I'm like a bird. My only fuck.
Come on. I don't have a singing.
I don't know, Emma. Come on.
Skull is home. I don't know.
What kind of bird would you be if you were a bird, bud?

Speaker 1 I was scared of birds, actually.

Speaker 1 My brother had a bird who was too friendly, and he would.

Speaker 1 What do you mean, too friendly? I remember breaking my box spring in half because the bird would chase me. And this is like probably when I was 24.

Speaker 1 It was a couple years ago. Yeah, like, and then I just threw like a comforter at the bird.
It's just like...

Speaker 1 But I didn't get it.

Speaker 1 What kind of bird was it? A street bird. A streetbird.
A streetbird. Like a finchy.

Speaker 1 The brown one. The little one.
The brown one.

Speaker 1 A little tiny one. Yeah, like the one you would see on the street.
Right, right.

Speaker 1 So that little tiny guy was chasing you around the fucking apartment, huh? And you broke a spring bar. Yeah.
And you threw a comforter. Yeah, I was more 20 than 20.

Speaker 1 Wait a minute. How did your brother...
You mean a pigeon? Is that what you're saying? No, no, it was like one of those cute birds, but it's just like, do what birds do. Don't.

Speaker 1 How did your brother have it in the home? Did he get it from outside and brought it in?

Speaker 1 Look at some of these birds. Like that? Kind of like that.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Like more

Speaker 1 brown. More brown.

Speaker 1 Does that image make you scared when you look at that? Does that look like

Speaker 1 that looks dangerous?

Speaker 1 It's great when it's there, but if it was here, it's too close. Too close.
Oh, it's too close. All right, put away the birds.
Yeah. Birds in the studio.

Speaker 1 When's the last time you went to a zoo?

Speaker 1 Last time I went to a zoo, it was probably because anthropology class made me, and a baboon started jerking off in front of me, and I don't want to go back.

Speaker 1 Wait, stop. It was traumatic? Yeah, I wrote that in the anthropology paper, too.
That a baboon started jerking off. easily amused baboon.
I mean, easily aroused baboon.

Speaker 1 Was he staring at you when he was doing it? It was anger in his eyes.

Speaker 1 I'm just like, I'm writing this paper as quick as you're jerking, you know?

Speaker 1 I got to get out of here. So you haven't been there since high school? No, I was in community college for eight and a half years.

Speaker 1 I liked it a lot.

Speaker 1 I loved it. You didn't want to transfer? No, so eight years.
It's so eight.

Speaker 1 What community college? Glendale Community College. GCC, baby.
Yeah. Wow.
Home of the fighting dragons.

Speaker 1 Home of the fighting dragons. What did you study at GCC?

Speaker 1 Mass communications, but journalism and photography is what I was.

Speaker 1 Journalism and photography into mass communication umbrella. And eight years of this.
And did you finish?

Speaker 1 I couldn't finish. Just kidding.
I finished. You finished? Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 What do you get when you finish? I don't know.

Speaker 1 You get to wear a red dress and a tassel.

Speaker 1 You get to have tassels. But you haven't used the degree.
You got a degree, right? I wasn't going to go back to school. It was more of, you know, people.

Speaker 1 I think you did a lot of school. I wouldn't have to.
Oh, yeah. After eight years.

Speaker 1 You could be a doctor. I'm practically a doctor of.

Speaker 1 What do you think you're a doctor of? You have a doctorate in what? Ticketmaster, I think. Like, I like, you know, I look at seating charts way too much.
Of your, of what? For sure. Everything, yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. I love seating charts.
We got to get him a job at Live Nation or something. We could just hold it.
Following the blue dots. That's like.
No, what I'm just saying.

Speaker 1 Don't you think you want to move on from doing local comedy shows and move your way up? I think you'd be a great promoter in a bigger scale.

Speaker 1 But I guess, you know, honestly, like, you know, I love the comedy store. Like, I, I don't.
It's always going to be there. Yeah.
What's your dream, Greg?

Speaker 1 Honestly, it just keeps changing like with everyone that dies, you know.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I don't know. My dream, I guess is I don't tip over today.
Yeah, you won't. Stavros survived and I'm going to survive.

Speaker 1 And, you know, tell me what you think a dream of yours might be or like what is a goal in life that you'd like to achieve. It was getting back to the comedy store.
Well, you're there, baby.

Speaker 1 You're there now. So that's it.
You're doing it. There's nothing else that you feel like you kind of want a little bit in life.

Speaker 1 Oh, like before it was doing comedy and going on the road. I got to open for Paulie a few times, which was really fun, but then I just stopped.

Speaker 1 You know what? We got to have this guy. He's got to open for us.
You got to do one of our shows. Yeah, you got to do one of our shows.
You're coming to open for us.

Speaker 1 I think in Long Beach. You're going to come down to Long Beach and open for us.
They don't have tickets anymore. What do you mean? We're sold out? Yeah.
You have single tickets. No, you're performing.

Speaker 1 No, you're performing. You don't mean the backstage.

Speaker 1 You're not going to be in the audience. No.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.
No.

Speaker 1 Yes. No.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Why? Why not? You'll have to. We would love it.
We would love it.

Speaker 1 For us? How about this?

Speaker 1 Honestly, anything for you, Bobby. I wouldn't.

Speaker 1 Polly has asked me to do the podcast before, and I said no, because I can't.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but you're, but, but here's the deal: you're going to, how about come with us to long beach okay be backstage side stage you'll be with carlos and fancy and the crew if you decide at some point you'd be fun to go say hi

Speaker 1 he's not gonna do it we have to make him do it no you don't get i can't force him to do it

Speaker 1 is if it's not too soon oh uh

Speaker 1 i wouldn't need time to why

Speaker 1 because i you know i'm more of like a britney spears type performer where it's like robotic So you want, do you want, we can get pyro and all sorts of shit for you. Do you want a snake up there?

Speaker 1 Knives? Let's get you a knife. February 24th, you're going to be doing Long Beach with us.
You're going to at least come and hang out. It's a month away.
It's a month away. A month away.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, how about this? We'll get you transportation down there. We'll take care of you.
I was going to come anyway. And you have your own show.
Horrible, funny.

Speaker 1 Why don't you just put yourself up there for five minutes? Yeah, why not?

Speaker 1 Honestly, like, I would die, though. But because you wouldn't.
I promise you won't die. I promise you.
Well, he could die. Given his family traps.
Who's going to be on deck?

Speaker 1 Like, you know, it's just like, you know, it's always worried about, oh, are they going to be, who's going to be on deck? What if someone cancels last minute? All right. Okay.

Speaker 1 But no, but but I would, I honestly, it would be an honor. Um, I want to get some scoop on, so you, you, you're a promoter, right?

Speaker 1 And I'm sure there are comics that you book, right, that are nicer than others. The goop scoop.
I want the goop scoop. We want the goop scoop, baby.
Right? And we have to go to the book.

Speaker 1 You don't have a title card up there. You don't have to name names.
Let me ask you. Let me ask you a question.
Are there comics kinder than others? Absolutely. Okay.
Are there comics that you book

Speaker 1 that you don't really like that much?

Speaker 1 That's not necessarily true because, like, that's the problem. Like, I have, uh, I only book comics I like.
Oh, that's great. Oh, that's good.
Yeah, because you always book Arsinio. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you love him. Yeah.
He's great. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Kills. Yeah.
Kills. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Is there someone that you don't really like that's not that nice to you that you book? And you can say it and we'll, we're going to blank it out. You're not going to.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We are. Look at me.
Look at me. Look at me right now.
Look at me. We would never.
I'm dead serious. We would never.
Yeah, yeah. We would never.

Speaker 1 We'll do something. We're never going to fuck you.
We would never do that. That's insane.
We guessed you on our show. You're on our show.
Yeah, yeah. We would never.

Speaker 1 I've never seen Jeselnik on your shows. He has done.
Okay, well, then he's done it. Anthony Jeselnik is one of my favorite comics.

Speaker 1 And actually, he was supposed to do the show that you did January 8th. And

Speaker 1 he asked to do it, and I said we already found it. I've never seen Nikki Glazier on your shows.
Nikki Glazier has done the show.

Speaker 1 Nikki Glazier.

Speaker 1 We need to sign a petition to get Nikki Glazer back to the West Coast. No, she loves St.
Louis, man. No.
Okay, well.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I love Nikki Gladys. Has Eliza done your shows? Yeah, Eliza's the regular.

Speaker 1 Nikki, Nikki could move back to the West Coast. You've got a little bit of room in that place of yours, I think, right? Yeah, we could house.
Yeah, yeah, you could house, house comic.

Speaker 1 So, who hasn't done your show and we'll be bleep it that you don't like that much? There's got to be some cover your mouth when you do it and we'll bleep it. We'll bleep it, I promise.

Speaker 1 I swear I'm on it. No, you know what? What comic I don't like? Yeah, that hasn't done your show.
That has done it or hasn't done it that you don't, that you're like, ugh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're not going to bleep it. I swear to God, we swear.
Why would would we fuck you? Look at me. That's my producer.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Our producer. We are not going to fuck you.
I promise you. We never.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we won't fuck you up. Yeah, yeah.
Cover your mouth if you say it. I'm not a big fan of.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
He's not going to do it anyway. I know.

Speaker 1 That's the only one?

Speaker 1 Have you had.

Speaker 1 No, he won't respond. I had him when we were in the belly room, but he's not responding, you know, as far as you know.
You have a number. No.
All right.

Speaker 1 Say who's been the meanest to you, who's been the rudest or the most disrespectful or just kind of not nice to you. I I guess you're going to bleep.
Yeah, I promise. Well,

Speaker 1 I guess

Speaker 1 has different.

Speaker 1 It was hard to work with him. Yeah.
Yeah. That's a bummer.
And that's feasible. But it's also not a surprise.
But if he's on a little later, then, you know, and even if it's natural causes,

Speaker 1 and it's not. So he's probably a type of guy that doesn't say hi to you and talk to you.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 it was hard because like the first time, like the first time I, and the only like time I really messed up was when I was working My job before I had before this was a marketing operations project specialist.

Speaker 1 Too many words. Yeah, it was used to be marketing production traffic coordinator.
It was so many words. What was this for?

Speaker 1 A healthcare company. So what were you doing for them? Traffic production project coordinator.
Yeah, but what are you doing? We know the title.

Speaker 1 Traffic production project costator. What were you for? You showed up and you clocked in.
What the fuck did you do? I get breakfast.

Speaker 1 The cafe downstairs. All right, all right.
You got breakfast for people. How long? No, no, no, no, for me.

Speaker 1 And then I go back up. Oh.
And then, you know, I worked on this

Speaker 1 project management tool system.

Speaker 1 You did, you did programming. I wouldn't say that because I can't do that.
So what did you do? It was like programming for dummies.

Speaker 1 You literally, instead of building something crazy, you just click and drag, and then all of a sudden the app has that tool. Okay, cool.
Oh, cool. Yeah.
So you're, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 You were building, you were building something on the internet.

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Speaker 1 What would be your dream job now? If I said, what is your dream job, Greg? Are you doing it? Is it booking or not? I love doing this. Honestly, I stopped dreaming, but I maybe I have to start again.

Speaker 1 You don't have to dream, but I'm saying, what would be a job that you go, you know what would be really fun to do? I would enjoy blank. A festival booker.
Like, I love

Speaker 1 that.

Speaker 1 That's that's actually what we need to get him to do live nation coachella needs help like you know you'd be great at that coachella needs help why you think the lineups are not good oh my god they're bad i mean i'm looking for any excuse to go you know eat two edibles and roll around in the desert but like it's right not happening okay let me let me i'll throw some names out and you well look at there's see if you would book it see if you would book it how about how about this lana del ray great the last album was great this is a this is a she's headlining first night you into it no because have you seen her perform Is she a bad performer?

Speaker 1 He's a bad performer.

Speaker 1 And he knows. How about piece? How about Peso Paluma? Paluma.
You know,

Speaker 1 he looks like more friendly and more dangerous than Bad Bunny at the same time. Okay, how about Lil Uzi Vert? You like Lil Uzi? I don't know that one.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's say Andrew and I were like, we're managers and we manage a bunch of bands. And we're calling you.
And you're booking Coachella. Uh-huh.
Right. You get night two, Greg.
Who you got for him?

Speaker 1 Hey, so, no, we were pitching him. Oh.
Hey, Goop. We're managers.
manager. Oh, sorry about that.
Hey, Goop, it's us.

Speaker 1 Hey, Goop. Hey, Goop, it's Santino and Bob.
What's happening? Hi, WME or UTA. No, we're just Santino League manager.
Santino League Manager.

Speaker 1 Hello. Hi.
Yeah. Hey, Goop.
So

Speaker 1 we got some bands for you. We're booking night two.
You're booking night two, so can we throw you some bands if you say yes or no? So we got limp, a limpster, limpster. Limp biscuit.

Speaker 1 You can't do it like that because I can't say that. Oh, because they're our clients.
That's our clients. That's going to hurt us.
Okay, okay. So you've got to come up with some excuse.

Speaker 1 And be smart about it. I would contact Carlos.
He's booking Sunday and he's doing lots of throwbacks. Okay, cool.
Okay, so arts of no. By the way, good deflection.
Very good.

Speaker 1 Because we can't take it on Saturday. Okay, so Goop, we've got a couple of throwback stuff, but I guess we'll give that to Carlos.
So you only want New Age stuff right now, right?

Speaker 1 We got Adele. Oh, Adele.

Speaker 1 Yes, welcome. You like her? You want Adele.

Speaker 1 She headline? Oh,

Speaker 1 she could have the whole thing. Yeah.
Okay. Okay, good.
All right, so we don't. We don't manage her.
We don't anymore.

Speaker 1 She dropped it. We were just testing it.
Okay. Yeah, we don't manage her.
We have Selena Gomez. She's like to perform.
What do you think? Okay.

Speaker 1 You're not into that? Headliner or probably second or what? Second. Oh, second.
Yeah. Second and the night or second to last? No.
Second to last and second in the lineup. Okay, good.

Speaker 1 That's two different things.

Speaker 1 That's fine. I'm trying to say.

Speaker 1 Second to last in the night.

Speaker 1 So let's put her.

Speaker 1 Selena. So we got Selena going.

Speaker 1 She's going to come sing. Yeah, yeah.
Wonderful.

Speaker 1 We've got

Speaker 1 Neil Diamond. Yeah, we have Neil.

Speaker 1 I don't know. We've got Neil Diamond.

Speaker 1 He already has a show. Coming to America.
Donna, Donna.

Speaker 1 Coming to America.

Speaker 1 You know? No. No.
Your parents didn't then sing that when they came home? Did you see Carrots?

Speaker 1 Sweet Caroline.

Speaker 1 I got the Glee song. That's Leah Michelle, and she's welcome.
She's welcome. All right, so no to Neil.
No, to Neil. Even Sunday?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Carlos is booking.

Speaker 1 Carlos is a fucked up.

Speaker 1 Give me your ideal lineup at a festival. Yeah.
One night. Just give me one night.
Don't look at that.

Speaker 1 Don't look at that. Get that out of it.
Four acts. Four acts.
Five acts. One nuts.
Five. Five acts.
One night. Opener.
Go.

Speaker 1 This is like so hard. Like, I would have to get back to you.
No, no, no, no. Do it now.
No. You do it now.
Miley's definitely there. Alright, so Miley won.

Speaker 1 We don't know yet the arrangement, but Miley, no particular order. Miley.
Yeah. And the Killers are a great festival act.
So killers. Killers.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Shit. I, you know,

Speaker 1 I, uh,

Speaker 1 shit.

Speaker 1 I have to.

Speaker 1 Who's on your Spotify playlist right now?

Speaker 1 Who's on your most listened? No.

Speaker 1 Oh, Kesha. Kesha's a good time.
Okay, Kesha. Three? Okay, good.

Speaker 1 I've been...

Speaker 1 When you say good time, though. What does that mean? What does that mean?

Speaker 1 Just, you know, have a few drinks and, you know. So you'd like to have a few drinks and you like to have a little bit of Eddie's.
Do you do other ingestibles?

Speaker 1 No, because once I have an addictive personality, obviously.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And so I have to.

Speaker 1 Have you done acid?

Speaker 1 No. Like Molly?

Speaker 1 No. No, Molly.
I would like, like, I would love to, but I know that would be last week personally. Have you ever smoked? Oh, Oh, yeah, you do.
Yeah, yeah, but I suck at it. You suck at it.

Speaker 1 Any nose beers? Oh.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I thought I had something in my nose. No, it's cocaine.

Speaker 1 Cocaine. You have cocaine.
Never done cocaine. No.

Speaker 1 I'm open to it, but I know that. You're open to it.
I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't.
Your heart would explode. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I won't make it. I'm going to talk to you about it.
It's not a good thing. All right.
So, how about this?

Speaker 1 That's your ultimate kind of lineup would be Miley, Killers.

Speaker 1 What did we say? Kesha. Kesha.
That's pretty good. That's a good lineup.
You think you could facilitate a festival if you could reach these people's managers? You could get something together?

Speaker 1 Like, you could be the new Firefest. I loved Firefest.
Did you go to Firefest? I have an actual wristband from Firefest, an artist band. So you went to Firefest.

Speaker 1 You got fed the bologna sandwiches and all that stuff? No, I was a fan afterwards. So I bought all the

Speaker 1 merchandise that were in crates in the ocean. And I bought an artist wristband.
Do we do the

Speaker 1 early follower? We come up with a complete thing. The Goop fest.
I think we should do goop. We don't do a fucking island.
Where do we do it on?

Speaker 1 Huh? We don't do it on an island. No, no, no.
Like a toll or

Speaker 1 a peninsula. We'll do it in a peninsula.
Or an Izza. The peninsula.
The hotel is nice. What? We're not going to do it at the hotel.
Yeah, what hotel? The peninsula, he's talking about.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 A mountaintop? Do they do one on a mountaintop? We should. Kanye already did that.
All right, so where do we do the goop fest? Where does goop fest take place?

Speaker 1 Antarctica. Frito-Lay's Factory.
No. Okay, at the Chippy's Factory.
At the Chippy Factory. Okay, good.
So we'll get a hold of Frito-Lay. Guys, reach out to Frito-Lay.

Speaker 1 See if we can do the Goop Fest presented by Frito Lay. Did you follow up with Andreas? With Carlos.

Speaker 1 Carlos is going to be doing that for me. So we're going to be at the Frito-Lay Factory.
Where is that? What town is that in? It's in Perry Plant, Georgia. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So if you live anywhere near there, just know Goop Fest is coming to you in the next couple of years at the Frito-Lay Perry Plant Factory.

Speaker 1 Now, let's get images of what this is going to look like because we just want to map it out a little bit.

Speaker 1 Of the physical plant. No, no, no, just go to images, baby boy.
Yeah, let's go to images, baby boy. Let's see what they look like.
Let's see what they're. So, this is

Speaker 1 that's where Goop Fest is going to be taking place. Yeah, it seems so hot.
That's no different. Oh, yeah, Georgia is hot.
Look at that. Yeah, but we'll do it in the winter.
We'll do it in the fall.

Speaker 1 Oh, we can't do it in Georgia because they allow guns. We can't.

Speaker 1 Whoa, wait, stop. Yeah, that's they suck.
No, wait, wait, wait, wait, stop. What's up with guns? They allow them in Georgian festivals.
I know, but you don't like them.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's so scary. Guns.
You press the button and you kind of get. You've never held one.

Speaker 1 I used one of those things that to cut wood ones and I like sh shooked. Hold on, hold on.
A cut wood gun? No, I guess two different things.

Speaker 1 Anything with power scares me. Like a power tool, you're yeah, I used the table slicer.
Oh man. A table saw.
Yeah, I think my, I was my home, my, my, my teacher was like, let's get him away from this.

Speaker 1 He's gonna cry. So you don't like things that cause harm? I don't like things that cause harm, but also

Speaker 1 things that like shake. Things that shake.
Yeah. Or vibrate.
Yeah. What does that mean? What do you? I mean, it was just sh, you know, you don't like any sort of vibration or shaking.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I, yeah. It just.
You don't have tools at home.

Speaker 1 No, I have a brother who has tools. He's a tool.
Oh, no. He has tools.
He has tools. Got it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. So at night, when you go to sleep, what time are you going to bed?

Speaker 1 I go to bed at like 8, and then I wake up at like 11, and then I eat melatonin gummies, and then I go to sleep for another hour, and then I wake up again. You have sleep apnea.

Speaker 1 Is that when you like make weird noises? Yeah. Sure.
It's when you can't really breathe in your sleep. No, I'm good at that, like, but I'm not good at like staying asleep.

Speaker 1 But it's potentially serious, though, sleep apnea. Do you think we could get you a machine? Can the bad friends buy you a machine to maybe get you through the night?

Speaker 1 I want to get you through the night.

Speaker 1 You need one of those. No, that's the Batman movie one.
That's not Bane. No, that's not.
No, no. Do you do know that if you don't get any good sleep at all, it has neurodegenerative properties.

Speaker 1 You could start losing your mind if you don't get any sleep. I get too excited to sleep sometimes.
But we got to get you to sleep, dude.

Speaker 1 If you're sleeping three hours a night, that's fucking terrible. That's all you sleep is three hours? Some days it's better.
Like, I just, like, there's so many dogs on TikTok that need watching.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I agree with you. Yeah, we need to take you to Tulum over the summer.
Yeah. We need to go on a beach.

Speaker 1 No, I did that.

Speaker 1 No, you haven't. Not with us.
I did.

Speaker 1 I spent 10 nights in Cancun and it felt like I died and I was in purgatory. I know, but my point is not with us.
Cancun's not fucking Tulum. I need entertainment, but I I guess you're the...

Speaker 1 No, we're the entertainers. So when you go on vacation, you went solo? I always go solo.
It's not always... Have you ever been on vacation with family or friends or anybody? Well, last,

Speaker 1 I don't like... Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes. My idea of a vacation is I book like, you know,

Speaker 1 nine to 12 nights in New York City. And then I see like 16 to 18 shows.
Oh, you're one of those. Do you go to a show a night? Sometimes four.
Solo. Yeah.
You've seen Wicked?

Speaker 1 24 times and i stopped counting 24 times

Speaker 1 wicked wow yeah book of mormon i love book of mormon how many times have you seen it i've seen it you know over 10 times but also the best part about book of mormon is watching the audience watch book of mormon god dude i i i gotta never seen it have you it's fucking incredible first of all book of mormon yes it's amazing okay second second to this i saw lion king you're the most interesting motherfucker i've ever met in my entire life no yeah dude i've 24 times a wicked you can keep going yeah but you don't understand That's why.

Speaker 1 That's wild. I mean, you must, you're in love with it.
No, it's.

Speaker 1 You probably sing with it. Do you sing along? Sing along.
I'm an emotional person, and like, sometimes you could hear the emotion in these women's voices, and they all have different riffs. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I follow the riffs. I see.

Speaker 1 You love performing. You truly love performance.
Yeah. That's why you're saying about musicians that you don't like is because they put on a bad show.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
You don't you don't have any patience if they kind of mail it in quote unquote. You like a tight show

Speaker 1 I love a tight set list. Yes, yeah, a set list is like so important, right? So what have you seen the most on Broadway wicked

Speaker 1 I see a lot a lot like some of my oh, I was really into the one that was out about the Filipino dictator here lies love How many times do you see that?

Speaker 1 That one, I flew back Thanksgiving weekend because it was closing. So I before I buried my father, I had to go bury the show and say goodbye to that as well.
That's right.

Speaker 1 But the whole venue is like a little nightclub. You know, you take your candies and then, you know,

Speaker 1 they don't let you have drinks because you could spill. Oh, yeah.
But like the whole place is like a dance floor and like different VIP sections and the show happens all over.

Speaker 1 It's about Imilda Marcos. Yeah, we know.
Yeah. It was so awesome.
It's one of those shows where you're sitting there and there are actors on your side all around. All around, yeah.
Wow.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's interactive. If you're

Speaker 1 interactive. Well, the Lion King, I did.
Well, yeah, there's a giraffe that walks. Yeah, there's a giraffe that walks on.
Yeah, I did that. Like a wedding.
It scared the shit out of me, dude.

Speaker 1 There's a, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 There's a company called Sleep No More. Do you know Sleep No More? Yeah.
So have you seen a Sleep No More? I've been there. Which one have you seen? Which one?

Speaker 1 They, I've seen, I love them at Kittrick Hotel. They put on that.
I see, I'll do, I'll see anything the most. Do you know what this is? No.
Sleep No More is incredible.

Speaker 1 It's a theater company that basically puts on live interactive plays.

Speaker 1 You are a part. No, no, they're not all the same.
There's a bunch of different stories. Yep, you wear masks.
You wear the mask

Speaker 1 as a viewer. And you literally walk around from room to room while the play goes on in front of you.
We went to London. We went to see one called The Drowned Man.
Did you ever see Drowned Man?

Speaker 1 I didn't see The Drowned Man. Oh, my fucking God.
Dude, you literally move through a factory. In London, it was in Shortitch, I think it was.
New York has it permanently.

Speaker 1 New York has it permanently now. Why?

Speaker 1 It's in New York. Sleep No More has it.

Speaker 1 And you go floor to floor, Bob, and you pick up the play in...

Speaker 1 pieces where it's happening like this or people are viewing the play while it's taking place they could move they could leave the scene whenever they want go to another scene You don't have to stay in one spot.

Speaker 1 Wow. It's

Speaker 1 like you can follow one actor. You can follow a group.
But if I want to see the whole movie, what happens? You stay for an hour or two and you get loop. You start to learn.

Speaker 1 You might get the end of the fucking show in the beginning. Every time you go, you'll see something different.
Pretty rarely, because there is no beginning and end, quote-unquote.

Speaker 1 It's a big loop, so you don't really know what part of the loop you're in. The story is continually

Speaker 1 growing and changing. So you could hypothetically start in the middle and the second middle could be the end to you.

Speaker 1 It's closing. They keep extending it, but it's closing now March 31st.
I'm going to see it the last Thursday of March. I highly recommend in LA, you mean? No, in New York.

Speaker 1 I'm planning my next New York trip. It's one of the greatest things I think I've ever seen live.
I'm going to watch it though. In my life.
And also, can we go together? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I would love to go with you. They separate people, though.
That's funny if you. They do.

Speaker 1 They open an elevator door. They let someone walk out.
Then they close the elevator door. So if you and I go, like I went with my wife, if they separated us on purpose, they don't want you.

Speaker 1 They usually want you to be alone. And you can get touched and kissed and hugged and and pulled in the room.
Did you get touched?

Speaker 1 I've gone like a lot of times and like, you know, sometimes they just drag you and then sometimes they just like do some weird stuff. You know, I've been kissed.
Yeah. I got kissed.
On your mask?

Speaker 1 Well, she kissed, she moved my mask and she like kissed my cheek and then kissed right by my lips. She must have known

Speaker 1 her. Did you get hard? No, huh? A little hard.

Speaker 1 You get a little hard. Did I get a little hard, Greg? As long as it doesn't last more than 24 hours, it's good.

Speaker 1 Have you had a boner for 24 hours one time? No, but if I I do, I know what to do. What do you do? What do you do? I think then I have to go to the wake up or I'm going to call 911.

Speaker 1 Or go to sleep or I'm going to call 911. That's right.
Go to sleep or I'm calling 911.

Speaker 1 Wow. So you've had a house full of unfortunate death and

Speaker 1 you're now making your way into the world as a single man who's owning his own business. So you've succeeded tremendously because the show is extremely successful.
You get awesome comics.

Speaker 1 It's always sold out. So you've achieved a lot

Speaker 1 amongst heartbreak. He pays the most.
He pays good money for the picture. Yes, he's fair.
He's fair the most. He's fair.
Whoa. He's fair

Speaker 1 and true and just. But you get a nice chunk, huh? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I have to pay for Adele. Adele needs a lot of money.
So how much money do you think you spend a month on shows? Is it all your checks?

Speaker 1 I'm smart with my money, but the things I, after every horribly funny, I go. and I don't come back until the next horribly funny usually.
Where would you go? To New York? Like, see, my next thing?

Speaker 1 I was just in um las vegas for new year's and um i saw uh post malone christina aguilera demi lobato and a bunch of bangers kelly clarkson in one show no four different shows

Speaker 1 like you know you just have to like leave and go to the next one a little earlier oh i see but um after this horribly funny i'm going to las vegas again i'm not a big fan of his but like you know at this point i'll see anything with that within reason but i'm gonna see bruno mars uh adele

Speaker 1 There has to be other people. Usher is in Vegas.
Have you seen Usher? I haven't seen Usher. You have no, no, you know, Bruno Mars is a great entertainer.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 he is a great entertainer. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But, but, yeah, just. So, every dime you make goes to live entertainment.
It goes right back into entertainment. And I love festivals.
I love VIP experiences at festivals.

Speaker 1 Like, treat me well in a parking lot. You know, that's, that's what, you know.
I don't even understand what that means.

Speaker 1 Because, like, all these festivals are, like, basically in a parking lot and they like charge thousands of dollars. dude imagine him when he in woodstock what went wrong

Speaker 1 i would be calling my mom i know there's no water no water right right no water you're trapped people get trampled to death i actually had friends call and ask if i was at fire festival like because really yeah uh but no i wasn't like the lineup wasn't good or i would have been okay here you go you're at you're at firefest okay you're trapped no it is kind of a deserted island at this point what is your final meal gonna be if they say greg we're gonna have to we don't we can't get get you out of here.

Speaker 1 We're gonna give you your final meal. What's your final meal? I thought about it.
I like, even if I knew I was gonna die, I wouldn't go back to eating meat just because out of being kind.

Speaker 1 That's your moral, that's your moral, but it's like also it's not religious, so it's not weird. But like Miley Styris has kind of has been like, it's kind of like a religion.
She's the fucking best.

Speaker 1 So tell me what your final meal would be. Um, probably all the chips.

Speaker 1 What are we talking? What kind? What flavors? Like, what's your, what's your I love barbecue. I love all the Doritos families really yeah are we talking spicy nacho

Speaker 1 spicy nacho and then the half the fun is you know afterwards when you're getting it off your fingers and then you fall asleep so when you lick your fingers is your favorite so your last meal would just be chips you like do you like the mexican ones where this is limon

Speaker 1 uh you know what oh those what are they called takis i don't know yeah

Speaker 1 most of them are stale like you know i try i like them they're hard to find i don't go grocery shopping outside like i don't do anything yeah you know i just get everything delivered, but like they rarely have them.

Speaker 1 And they finally have them and it was stale. And then I got them once in Las Vegas and it was stale there too.
Where do you stay in Las Vegas? I like to stay somewhere different every night.

Speaker 1 And like, wait a minute, wait a minute. If you're there for how many days, three, four days?

Speaker 1 Last time I was supposed to be there for seven nights, but one of the nights I decided to book a two-floor suite and then I forgot. How much money are you making?

Speaker 1 And then I, and I kind of fell down a spiral staircase, but it was glamorous.

Speaker 1 like you know and then i was just sitting down and going looking up i'm like it's funny to have a two-floor suite and not be able to go up the stairs sure whoa you know so you change hotels every night yeah why why why would you do that to yourself i because i'm a very uh a person who

Speaker 1 uh

Speaker 1 i guess what's that word it's nomadic restless restless uh i guess close but no it's it's like when um

Speaker 1 nostalgic and i have different memories in different places and you know it's a good way to like, you know, experience different things.

Speaker 1 And it's also a way to get yourself back into a different, a place you were in a different time in your life. Nostalgic.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we have.

Speaker 1 How many

Speaker 1 how many horribly funnies do you do a month? Two. Only two a month.
Yeah. Only two shows.
Two shows. There were some months where they were

Speaker 1 trying to say you need to double up. You don't double up? And I did.
Some months worked and sometimes it doesn't, but like a 10.30 p.m. show on a Monday.
Right. Because I'm trying to do the math.

Speaker 1 You know.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I charge more than other promoters. I know.
But I'm just seeing how much you make. So I get, yeah.
So that's, yeah, that's a lot. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
But yeah, it goes, it goes back to the community.

Speaker 1 Just, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Entertainment. Entertainment.
That's great. Live entertainment.
Yeah. What part of the city do you live in? Los Beliz.

Speaker 1 Sorry? Los Beliz? Yes. Los Files.
Oh, Los Files. Los Beliz.

Speaker 1 I really didn't know what you were saying. Oh, Los Belies.
Yeah. Yeah.
Not Belis. No, that's.
No. Say, say Los Files.
Los Felis. Los Files.
I can't. Los Feliz.
Los Feliz. Los Feliz.

Speaker 1 I went to Los Feliz Elementary School, but it's always been Los Felis. Wait, you're from there?

Speaker 1 I was bullied there.

Speaker 1 You were bullied there? Yeah. Who bullied you there? Everywhere.
And Armenian school was the worst. Well, let me tell you something.

Speaker 1 All these cocksuckers that bullied you, all these fucking pieces of shit that thought they were better than you, where are they? And look at you now. Successful business owner.

Speaker 1 You must have been the cutest kid imaginable. Actually, I'll show you.
I'll send you a picture.

Speaker 1 There's a picture of me kind of dressed the same with a microphone, like kind of the same as I would do, like, you know, if you drank sin, just singing.

Speaker 1 But I'll send you a picture for fun. So you're telling me you went to elementary school there, then where was high school? John Marshall High School.
John Marshall. Right on.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and I was not in the yearbook, and I didn't go to prom because Avril Levine had concerts. Well, that's a good reason to skip.
Oh, so you've always been like this. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. What's the first show you've ever seen, Craig? So

Speaker 1 my first big show was Wango Tango, but my first solo artist was Nellie Furtado at the Wiltern Theater. Wow.
The Brown and the Spawn.

Speaker 1 It was the best. There were bubbles, too.

Speaker 1 There was.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there were bubbles. You love bubbles.

Speaker 1 I can tell. I can tell.
I love lots of lights. Light show.
Big lights. But I don't like EDF.
Do you take bubble baths?

Speaker 1 No, I don't. It's hard to get this in and out of things.
Oh, you take showers then? Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 What do you mean it's hard to get this in and out of things? It's a lot. Like, you know, like, literally, this chair deserves an award.
Like,

Speaker 1 bubbles are supposed to be a fairy. It has to feel legs if you guys are.
I want to go to a spa. You might be sitting on a bubble with a spa with you.
Would you go to a spa with me? No.

Speaker 1 Korean spa.

Speaker 1 Yes. No.
Why?

Speaker 1 Dude, I'm not going to look at your dick.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Wait, wait. No.
I won't look at your dick. Okay.
Okay. But can we go to Wii Spa?

Speaker 1 After, horribly funny. you and I will get in my car.
We go to Wii Spa. We go to the menu.
I'm not being real. I can't keep my t-shirt on.
No, no, no, no. You can keep your t-shirt on.

Speaker 1 You can keep whatever.

Speaker 1 No, when we go. I guess he can.
He can keep whatever he fucking wants. When we go, you got to get naked, put your shit in the fucking locker, and then you can put it on.
He doesn't want to get naked.

Speaker 1 I was like, but bullying. Just kidding.
You think I'm being. No, not you.
Not you. Yeah.
It just sounds. You could look at mine.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I guarantee you yours is bigger than Bobby's. Hey.

Speaker 1 Let's. Whoa, whoa, whoa, am I out of bounds?

Speaker 1 We can do a comparison. It's something to consider.

Speaker 1 Good job. Consider.
Let's think like that. We'll consider going to the spot.
But I think then we go upstairs and we'll do the fucking clay room. Clay room.
Clay room. Yeah, we lay in the clay, right?

Speaker 1 And we'll be fully clothed and we can reminisce.

Speaker 1 Don't you want to reminisce with me? I like reminiscing. Can we do this somewhere else? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. We can do wherever you want.
Okay. Where's your favorite restaurant to go to?

Speaker 1 Could we take you out for a nice dinner? I'd need to take you guys out to a nice dinner. Oh, no.
No, no. Where would you like us to take you? We can go to

Speaker 1 Hope. Have you been to Hope? I haven't been to Hope, but that's a street in downtown, right? Yeah.
I mean, there's a restaurant, right, that it's called H-O.

Speaker 1 I-HOP.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. They're healthy, organic, positive eating.

Speaker 1 Oh, that sounds like...

Speaker 1 It's a vegetarian place, and I heard it's great.

Speaker 1 Do you eat at vegetarian restaurants? No, I wouldn't eat at a vegan restaurant, which is crazy. Like, even though, like, you know, I don't have much options to begin with.

Speaker 1 But,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We'll get you out to somewhere special.

Speaker 1 No, seriously, I need to take you guys out. No.
But if you guys are down February 5th, it's Eliza, Margaret Cho, Esther, Rick Glassman. Can't have two Margaret Cho's on one show.

Speaker 1 It's too hard. Two Koreans.
No. No, yeah, one at a time.
That's what they say.

Speaker 1 People Margaret, dude, Margaret the other night. She's the fucking best.
I love her.

Speaker 1 But she had her dog, right? And she goes, hold this when I go on stage. And so I'm literally, you know what I mean? Sitting there with the dog.
And it was trembling. It's the sweetest dog.
I know.

Speaker 1 It doesn't know me. Yeah, but it also is a little scared.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. It does look sick.
And she did extra time, I felt like. So I was holding this dog, and I didn't want any, because other people walked up to me and went, you want me to hold it?

Speaker 1 I go, I can't. It's Marcus's dog.
She asked me. What time was it? That's how I

Speaker 1 protect that dog with my life when he's on. I know, me too.
Do you hold hold it? You know,

Speaker 1 at first, yeah, but if it's not going anywhere, I like, you know, I'm just like, you know, more like playing.

Speaker 1 Lucia.

Speaker 1 You could say it. Lucia? Lucia.
Lucia. Lucia.
Yeah, that one. That's what Lucia is saying.
Yeah, I said it over here. Oh, you did it? Yeah.

Speaker 1 But then Lucia turned to me. And kind of looked at my face and it went like,

Speaker 1 mom? Like, she thought I was.

Speaker 1 And then I kissed her in the mouth. The dog.
And then the dog thought I was Margaret. Well, the same face.
Same face. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So.
Okay, so, Greg,

Speaker 1 it's been more than a pleasure to have you on the show. No, thank you.
I mean it. You're.
Would you do it again?

Speaker 1 Yeah. We'd like to have you back.
Would you do it again? I think the fans are going to love you. You're such a lovable human being.

Speaker 1 But next time, you know, this was your introductory.

Speaker 1 Introduction. Introduction.
The next time you won't talk so much. We will just be a sidekick.
Yeah. But with Jetsy, what Jesse does.

Speaker 1 Right? So you can just interject. We'll sometimes throw it to you.
So it wouldn't be as much pressure. Okay.
Right. Did this feel like a lot of pressure? It was actually pretty awesome.

Speaker 1 It was awesome. Yeah.
Yeah. But I was so nervous.
But did we make you feel comfortable? Absolutely. Wonderful.
Yeah. I thought you did great.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think, you know, the old me would have really liked, you know, been liked it more. Yeah.
Well, I'm glad we got you. So why don't you sign off to the fans there in your camera?

Speaker 1 Go ahead and tell them, tell them,

Speaker 1 say what you need to say. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Thank you for being a bad friend.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
That's great. Yeah.
Thank you for being a bad friend. That's great.
Do it again.

Speaker 1 Thank you for being a bad friend. Oh, I think they did too many A's.
That's fine.

Speaker 1 Thank you for being a bad friend.

Speaker 1 I think he killed his family. You think he killed his family?

Speaker 1 He said he doesn't like. I didn't want to ask him because I didn't want to have a heart attack, but he said that he doesn't like anyone breathing in his house.

Speaker 1 He likes to be alone.

Speaker 1 He imagined he was holding his aunt and he was like, yeah. Hey, Auntie.

Speaker 1 It's crazy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's crazy. He died in his arms.
His arm. That's awful.

Speaker 1 And you know what, dude? That's awful. What are you laughing at that for?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Carlos, you're a piece of shit, man.

Speaker 1 Carlos, are you still sober right now? Yes, I am. How's it been going? 10 days.

Speaker 1 10 days clean right now. Yeah.
You look great. You look bright-eyed.
Thank you. I appreciate that.

Speaker 1 You look prepared to take on this trip that we're taking this weekend. Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're going? Yeah, I'm going.

Speaker 1 No, and I'm not drinking. I have no plans to drink.
But you are coming. Yeah.
It's going to be great. You were super nice to my friends the other night.
Which ones? Oh,

Speaker 1 the friends, the females. The crew that you had? Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. They were such big fans, and they were so nervous to meet you.
Oh, they were so nice. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And then they were like, you were so kind. Well, my pleasure always.
You're storming around the castle of the comedy store looking like a king there. You had a harem of women.
Just friends.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it was a harem of young women friends. Meanwhile, the rest of the

Speaker 1 30s, something? Come on.

Speaker 1 Young ladies. I'm not saying it inappropriately.
I'm saying they're young ladies.

Speaker 1 30-something. Don't make it weird.
Yeah. Why did you make it weird?

Speaker 1 I'm not making it weird. I love that show.
First of all, not a one of them.

Speaker 1 Not a one of them was 30. They were all 27.

Speaker 1 So why are you making it worse? By the way, when Greg kept saying 27,

Speaker 1 what are we talking?

Speaker 1 My guess? 30 something? He could be 60. I don't know.

Speaker 1 I mean, I think he's in his late 30s. Mid-30s, I think.
Mid-30s. I think 33, 34.
Yeah. 33.
And I didn't want to also, you know, because he, you know, and I

Speaker 1 don't want to push it, right?

Speaker 1 But it's like when I told Andrew a couple of weeks ago that Greg, Craig, Greg, or Greg? It's Greg. Greg.
G-R-A-I-G. Yeah, Greg.
Greg. Greg.

Speaker 1 You told me his name was Craig. I've been calling him Craig.
No, it's Greg. Greg.
Okay. Yeah.
And you no, but he told us.