Pumpkins, Andy's Pandy, and Bobocopia ft. Rick Glassman

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You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? White dude and Asian dude.
You two are disgusting. You two are something.
We're bad friends. Back on the chain gang.
Back on the... Back on the chain.
Back on the chain gang. I don't know any other words in that song.
I saw a picture of you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh! It was the happiest days of our lives. Whoa! That's a...
What a song a song. And now I'm stuck at home because I got the bug.
Yeah. Oh.
I'm so sick. I need a hug.
Yeah. Yeah.
Testing. One, two, three.
Testing. Welcome to another episode.
Testing. Hi, Richard.
So happy to have you. Andrew, good to be back.
I love you.

What happened with the mic?

You have two mics there?

He brought his own mic.

I brought mine.

Which is, like, irritating.

No, it's good.

It's good.

No, it's good.

Thanks, Andrew.

That's smart.

Thank you.

Well, he did that when he came to Tiger Belly.

He brought his own earphones, mic, his own sprays.

Yeah, I don't know if you've heard.

I have corona.

And I'm literally in the hot seat. I know.
But it doesn't linger for, like, weeks. Yeah, I don't know if you've heard.
I have corona. And I'm literally in the hot seat.
I know. But it doesn't linger for like weeks.
Yeah, well, tell that to the judge. Welcome back to Bad Friends.
Welcome back to my favorite family, Bad Friends family. You know, we've got Jules in the house.
Jules in the house. She's playing her fucking video game with her friends.
Right? Online. You love it, huh? What's the game called? Mobile Legends.
Mobile Legends. We've got Andrew.
One of my bestest friends. Andrew Santino.
Fangul, Fangul. Forget about it.
Puffangulo, puffangulo. And then we've got Rick.
Sherlock Holmes. What are you wearing? It's a couple of things.
Yeah. First of all, obviously.
Is this a crime scene from the 1800s? What the fuck is going on here? Okay, are you going to burn me and give me a chance to reply or do you have a list of jokes you want to get through? I have no jokes. I'm just saying, what the fuck are you wearing? Moriarty? You think you're Moriarty?

This is coming out on Columbus

Day, and I wanted people to know that

I wasn't making a joke

if we ever get to explain my

perspective on Christopher

Columbus and what

Thanksgiving stands for. So I just wanted to make sure

I didn't make a joke of it. Also, it's October

weekend suit.

Andrew, we made a mistake. Do we make a mistake or I gotta tell you something yeah Rick and I spoke before the podcast he said I want to dress up for the podcast I said that's a great idea he said I want to honor the great Christopher Columbus who well I want to honor all of us hold on let me finish who all of us myself myself and Rick, people like Rick and I, white, American, hardworking males, we respect and we love Chris.
And we think the way he acquired this country was just. And that's it.
Andrew, we are out of time. And I have to say that before the pandemic, I was in the Pechanga Casino, and I was hanging out with my buddy Littlefoot.
Right? Isn't he from Land Before Time, Littlefoot? How come he isn't? Where has he been for the rest of the years? Well, they're going to make a remake one day. He can't be in it.
He's not a little. He's Bigfoot.
What? Who's Littlefoot? From Land Before Time. Was there a Littlefoot in Land Before Time? Oh, shit.
Yes. There was? You don't know your own friend's credits? Maybe you should have him on.
Anywho, Christopher Columbus, although be it discovered the country, they did some bad things as well. Yeah, and also he didn't discover the country.
That's like, oh, look, I discovered bad friends. We have the indigenous, and here I am to say, this is mine.
That's what Chris Columbus did. And as much as I don't want to get you, Santino.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
You're out of time. I don't like what he did.
What did he do? What did he do? Okay, I'll tell you what he did. He left Spain.
Okay. Thank God.
He came over here. And you remember the thing that people say, he didn't land on Plymouth Rock.
Plymouth Rock did something. Landed on him.
Something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's because of what Chris Columbus. Plymouth Rock was an asteroid.
We'll be right back after a word for Marshall Rock Gallery. I don't know.
If you're looking for just the right flooring, you need choices. And at Marshall Carpet One, you'll certainly find them.

Yeah.

We're back.

So anyway, let's talk.

I don't want to talk about history right now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right?

I do.

I want to talk about what we've been dealing with within our family for the last couple of weeks.

Yeah.

Which be it is that one of our family members, the King got a little bit of COVID got a little COVID a little bit of COVID do people know how it happened or no? I do no but do people know? have you talked about it? yeah I talked about it on my podcast on Whiskey Ginger with Dr. Drew in great detail.
I got it watching football outside, having a couple of beers. Fuck.
And then we played tackle football with a bunch of people we meet on Craigslist every Wednesday night. No, no, no.
Don't do that. Why? What do you mean? Andrew, COVID is out there now.
You don't know what your friends are doing, let alone what strangers on the Internet are doing. I put up I put up a post on Craigslist and I said, if any buds want to meet up, we're going to be a Pan Pacific Park.
Are you asking if people are tested? I'm only trying to test their integrity and their athletic ability. I want them to show up and show off.
And I got to tell you, it's shirtless it's it's skins versus skins and every time you score a touchdown you have to well you're supposed to lick the sweat of another opposing player so okay i don't know if that's how i got it or i got it from sitting watching the game outside but either way because i've been very mindful myself you know every i don't know if you know this but i have a charity once a week mud wrestling with the homeless i the Homeless. I get it.
I mud rustle with the homeless. Before the pandemic, we used to get completely naked, get in a vat of mud, and we would just go at it.
And now, we all wear condoms. So, yeah, we all wear condoms and we also wear our face masks, right? But our bodies touch, but you can't get it via that.
I get the game. Let me do one.

Yeah, do one.

He gets the game. He has one.

My girlfriend and I were

fucking each other.

And

wait, what is it?

What is it? I don't remember what it was.

Do one more of them.

Do one more.

Andrew, do one more. them do one more Andrew do one more keep it tight I got I got COVID we're out of time I get it that's it I got it so my girlfriend Betty lives in London and when she traveled over her arms are, blah, blah, blah.
Ha, ha, ha. And she had to wear a mask.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could swear on this, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
On her pussy. Or, um...
Oh, I want to start the whole podcast over. I do, I do.
Bobby came in not just judgmental but bad. Bobby came in bad and Andrew's not wearing the suit.
I'm hot. I'm real hot.
I'm going to have to get a dry clean so that means this podcast cost me minimum $25. I'm out of time.
The game was simple. I don't get it.
You guys are improvisers. do written jokes I came prepared I know With a written monologue Because he did it I'll tell you how it works I'll just tell you how it works He does a bit about Doing the football thing right And it's funny In my head I'm like Oh I get what he's doing Right Maybe I'll add one A make believe thing I don't really With a vat of mud Yeah yeah I don't really You know a vat of mud.
Yeah, yeah. I don't really, you know, wrestle mud wrestling with all of it.
Yeah, yours wasn't really funny, though. I got confused because Andrew told a story that I couldn't tell if it was real or not, and it sounded like you were just like, oh, I'm Bobby, a vat of mud.
I don't know. I don't know.
Start it over. Start it over.
Start it over. For real.
All right. Let's start it over.
For real, start it over. Really? You will? Start from the beginning? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Don't laugh at my... No.
We're already going. Let's just start over for him.
We're already rolling. Let's start over for him.
We're bad friends. We stand over there.
I'm going to introduce you. All right? All right? I know this game.
You don't know the game. Okay.
All right? And we're not playing that game. We're done with that portion of the...
I love it... We're done with that portion of the...
You fucking freak of nature.

I'm going to tell you something right now.

I'm the one that goes,

maybe Rick Glassman can do it,

and now I'm regretting my decision.

That's not true.

I know Andrew was the one,

and he told me that you are.

Okay, and so what I'm saying to you right now

is that you're making a fool out of yourself.

You were going to call me a Jew.

You were going to call me a Jew.

We're bad friends.

Back on the chain gang. I saw a picture of you.
All right, Rick Glassman's our guest host, everybody, ladies and gentlemen. He's wearing a suit.
We should do all the jokes that we did before. What are you, Sherlock Holmes? I'm going to be so much friendlier now.
I know when I'm unlikable, and I've been so unlik'm going to do better Andrew, how are you feeling though? Because I call you periodically And then you go, oh man, I'm tired But it seems as though you're on the road to recovery, right? I feel pretty good I feel very good, actually It's been two weeks And I feel much better than I did before That's for. It's been two weeks, and I feel much better than I did before, that's for sure.
It's a bummer. It's annoying.
It sucks. You are tired a lot.
But I fought through it. I got the Halloween decorations hung up.
There are gravestones in the front yard. There's skeletons poking out of the ground yeah uh i put up lights i washed both of the cars um i got into a fist fight with my neighbor jarley his name is jarley with a j j-a-r-l-i-e yeah i i choked him out but i was wearing a mask while i did it uh halloween mask i was wearing i was wearing the hollow the halloween michael myers mask while i did it sick um but i'm feeling a.
Sick. But I'm feeling a little bit better, boys.
I'm feeling a little bit better. And I miss my family.
I miss my bad friend's family. I do, too.
I miss you. I miss Jules.
I cannot stand George. And I miss Andres.
Yeah, I can't stand George either. Does COVID manifest itself into the eyebrows? Because it looks very thick today.
Yeah, no, I i puffed them up for you i've been using this eyebrow thickening spray it costs 14.99 what's it look good what's it called is there a promo code it's called thighbrows go to thighbrow.com you want your eyebrows as thick as your thighs go to thighbrow.com get yourself some thighbrowow spray. $14.99, 24-ounce spray.
I love it. Thighbrows.
Yeah, so I've been really concerned about you, Andrew, and this has been a really difficult, you know, couple of weeks for everybody. It was hard to keep it a secret.
You know I'm a blabbermouth. Yes, you are, big time.
You think I told anybody? Uh, yes, I do. Who do you know that I told? Be honest with me.
Who do you know that I told? Yeah, who do you know that I told? I know, and we'll discuss it off air. I didn't tell anybody, you piece of shit! I kicked in a fucking secret for two fucking weeks, bro! Let me tell you something.
Yeah. One person.
Yeah, I know you did.

One person.

Only one person.

Yeah.

Who did you tell us?

Go ahead and tell people because I know.

Okay.

Well, I want to first.

I love this game, right?

Why don't you tell me who I told?

I think that's a better route.

No, why don't you tell everybody who you told?

All right.

I told my mom.

I know you did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because she called me.

Yeah.

She said, I heard you got up with COVID. Yeah.
How are you peeing? How are you peeing? Feeling. Accent.
She said, how are you peeing? I heard peeing. That's not even peeing.
He was saying feeling. I was asking.
I get it. I get it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's because he's doing an accent.
He made it funny by putting his voice. You're not lactose intolerant, are you? I can tell by how much you're milking all of these questions.
That's milking all of these questions with Bobby Lee. My name is Rick Glassman, and we'll be right back after a word for Marshall Rangauer.
You know what does remind me of? Oh, he's with the snapping. What is this? West Side Story? You know what does remind me of now is Jeff Goldblum a bit.
Jeff Goldblum. Yeah, without medication.
Like on the fringe, Jeff Goldblum. Are you allowed to talk about Jeff's...
I'm sorry, Andrew, but are you allowed to talk about another person's medication? Is he open that he does that? I don't know that he does. I was just...
Anyway... He's got...
Jeff has been pretty open about his medication. Yeah.
The thing about you too, Rick too I don't know how you did it months ago Kalilah, my girlfriend was like can I just explain it? you're supposed to do that you're supposed to do you said you Milking it. She was like, I don't know about that Rick Glassman.
And then once you have this way about you, once you were able to do our podcast, you got involved. Like you sold yourself to my girlfriend.
Now she loves you. I sold myself.
So what I'm saying is that, is that generally when you meet people, is that how, did you figure that out? That's a good question, Bobby. Bobby? Yeah? Bobby, the thing is, much like Andrew, in fact, exactly like Andrew, people make up their mind about us right away.
Now, they might be right. They might be wrong.
We can't control that. All we could do is either validate it or prove them wrong so kalilah made her opinion of me which was i don't know apparently she didn't like me well it's the same opinion um that people listening right now is having are having yeah that opinion the hundreds of thousand people listening to you right now is having that opinion you're absolutely right and here's what i what I want to say to them.
All I care about is you recognize you don't have to think you know. I just want you to admit that you're not sure when Christopher Columbus came and ravaged the indigenous people.
And we are here to celebrate his accomplishments. Just think about it this way.
How would you feel if somebody came into your podcast studio, looked into the mic, and started talking for a minute without bringing a gift? You go ahead i got something for you okay go ahead he always brings gifts that's what's nice about him it's really nice and by the way i'm annoyed that we skip right over this christopher columbus stuff i want to say happy christopher columbus to everybody all the italians all the spanish thank you guys so much for your support well let's let's keep those statues up what size are you medium see i wasn't sure. I'm serious.
I wouldn't be surprised if you're a medium, large, or extra large. Medium because of your height, but extra large because you have a body type that is confusing.
And I'm not even saying that meanly. It's just your body is...
What would you guess he is? A medium? An extra large? Did I not wear a small shirt the other day that fit perfectly? Yeah, you did. Yeah, because your eyes deceive you.
Yeah of his body is like a a thanksgiving gourd you know like a cornucopia gourd you know yeah where it's tiny at the bottom it's nice and thick like a vase in the middle and it necks up a little bit and then the very top it's overflowing with shit there's because his head is massive it's it's just shit's coming out the tip top so it's just like this beautiful gourd. It's like a beautiful cornucopia gourd.
And I just want to grab it and shake it and kiss it right in the middle and smooch it and poke it and pull it. Andrew, I have a question.
If I could be sincere with you guys and you actually believe me and I need maybe a minute.

The position I'm finding myself in, I'm being 100% serious.

Bobby, look, you can see because my eyes might start to water.

It's a confusing position for me to be in.

Because I'm not guest hosting.

I'm just here.

And I'm finding myself in a position to where, what do I do? Do I try and stand out and look desperate? Do I sit back and not say anything? Do I play with one of my friends or do I fight with one of my enemies? And I don't know how to handle this situation right now. So I'm going to, I'm just going to play it cool.
I look like a shit gourd. That's what you, wait, wait, wait.
I'm sorry. I'm just, my bad.
I look like a shit gourd? That's what you...

Wait, wait, wait.

I'm sorry.

I'm just...

My bad.

I look like gourd shit.

You look like gourd shit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You look like one of those...

You know when somebody paints a cornucopia,

like one of those impressionist paintings?

Yeah, I know.

But it's all sloppy and the fruit's all rotten

and there's flies all over it.

I mean, it just looks... Everything has gone bad.
Everything has gone bad. Just open your gift and enjoy your gift.
And say thank you to Rick, please. Doesn't matter, it's over.
I'm hot. What does it say? Scooby, Scooby, Bluppity, Blue.
Scooby Scooby

Bluppity

Blue

Scooby

Oh yeah

It's a theme song to

To my podcast

Yeah this has gone to shit

The energy

I honestly

I haven't

This has gone to shit

I haven't felt bomb energy

In over a decade

I'm serious

Yeah yeah yeah

It's a combination of the suit

This has gone to shit

And how hot I am

It's

It's backfired

I'm embarrassed

Yeah I'm gonna be It's a combination of the suit and how hot I am. It's backfired.
I'm embarrassed. Yeah, I'm going to be honest now.
Yeah. That's garbage.
It's a tri-blank. That's better than any of your merch.
That's garbage. Okay.
And you know what? Fine. That shirt.
They're all for you. That shirt right there is going to stay there for months.
I'll take it. All right? Do not move that shirt.
Nobody in this building moved that shirt. That piece of shit shirt is going to sit there for months.
It's not the right size. I don't get the fucking font.
I don't get the message. You know what I mean? It's my theme song.
It's not funny. Everything doesn't have to be funny.
It's a theme song. It's just a's funny.
Heaven's funny. This is not, I didn't give you this as a gift, number one.
Number two, this is some bullshit fucking thrift store shirt that I just put on. Dude, I hate bombing.
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You know, when we're in the car with Julian, I told her, I go, he, you know, he's neurotic. Did I say that? He's a little all over the place.
But he really is a funny guy, you know, and and this is going to be great. Now, that being said, let's just rewind back.

There were feelings for myself of regret, I have to admit, of even asking you to do it.

I felt it when you asked me.

I understand that.

I said, are you sure?

As soon as I saw what you were wearing, I'm like, oh, shit.

Hold up a bit.

This is a little weird.

He's having a fucking breakdown.

Why? I got a new place. Let me finish what I'm going to say, you fucker.
All right? And during, you know, since we've started, you know, there were moments of like, you know, oh, this is going to be great. No.
Yeah. Yeah.
You know, all those feelings, right? Yeah. But at the end of the day, the reason why you're here is you just have to be yourself.

And everything that we've done so far has been very good, I think. It's entertaining.
What do you guys think? Okay. Now, listen.
They don't ever talk. What are you saying? That was the saddest thing I've ever heard about it oh god that was pure rejection that was pure pain and suffering right in front of your face holy shit I apologize that you had to fucking witness that they don't really ever talk.
Fancy Bean and George.

Oh, I was asking YouTube.

I wasn't thinking about it.

Oh, you were talking.

I was like, what are you guys saying?

And that's a very good save.

And that's why you're here.

Because you're very, right?

That was a very good save, right?

Yeah.

That's why you're crafty with your words and your mind.

When you get crafty, I want you to know that I know that you're doing anti-Semitic words.

Is crafty anti-Semitic? Yeah. Tell me why.
People say crafty. People say crafty instead of saying, oh, you know how to move money around.
No. Andrew, back me up.
Is the Riddler crafty? Yes. Is he Jewish? No, he's not.
Yes, he is. The Riddler's The Riddler's Jewish.
Yes, he is. By the way, Riddlebaum, no joke, was written and originally a Jewish character.
And the question mark was, will he survive? Because this was World War II. Yeah, yeah.
Okay, well, then I'm going to say this. You're right.
He was anti-Semitic. They wanted to know if he was going to survive after the Great Depression.
Right. And what Rick is explaining is Riddlebaum had put a lot of his money all over town.

The original question mark was, where is his money?

Where is he hiding it?

That's where the Mario coins come from.

Because we hide them in brick and mortar.

I see.

So when you say words like that, crafty, Bobby, it's quite frankly, it's offensive to most,

if not all, Jewish people.

Listen, guys,

here's what I'm going to suggest.

Yeah. I know.
I'm still hung up on the fucking, fucking

shit squash. Oh, I'm sure you're

so offended that you look like a

squash. There isn't a person

watching this that hasn't said squash.

Not one. Not one person

that hasn't said squash. That doesn't bother you.
Look at that picture behind you. It looks like you're growing from a gourd.
Now what I'd like to ask of you guys is could we try three crazy Andrew over here. He's crazy.
You're nuts. I'm a goof.
Could we try and actually get in it for at least ten minutes at some point in this podcast I think we should do an improv game what do you think so you say a sentence of a story Andrew has never said no once if a camera's going on him you know just an old fashioned second city improv game and I'll make it up I don't even know if this is a game you tell me say, you tell me one sentence of a story, right? One sentence. I'll do the second sentence, and we'll just keep going.
Jules, you have to go. Oh, that is a game where you do one word.
You do one word. Jules.
Word. One word.
One word. Everyone says one word.
Is that what it is? Is that the sentence? You say one word, and then you try and keep the cadence of an actual story. Yeah, yeah.
You want to try that? A phrase or a word? Which one are we doing? We're telling a story. Let's do the phrase.
One word, I mean. Let's do a word.
Okay, just a word. Yeah, yeah.
You want to try that? A phrase or a word? We're telling a story. Let's do the phrase.

One word, I mean. Let's do a word.

Okay, just a word. Yeah, so Jules,

you're playing, number one.

And number two, this is

how it works. No, this is

how you

works.

We'll be right back.

Yeah, but that's

exactly how it is. everyone says you know what I mean you're supposed to say it Jules you're supposed to say it but it's fine alright Jules do you not want to try it Jules I'm ready to go alright once there was a pumpkin gourd in Connecticut and it went what What did she say? Went.
Yeah, this isn't going to work. Get closer to the mic.
Yeah, you have to get closer to the mic. Also, you can't take time.
It has to be da-da-da-da-da-da-da. No one can take time.
I didn't. Yeah, you did.
She's got to speak up. She's got to speak up.
Okay. And louder.
Put the mic to your mouth. Here we go.
Ready? I'm sorry. Ready? I vowed never to say that again okay all right don't get angry okay so once there was a woman named chlorine and she swam very well but one time there was this huge pumpkin alright what does that have to do with the swimming stop stop stop you know the last one we did it's fine it's our first improv game the last one we did we brought up the pumpkin and I just saying, there's just so many nouns that you could have picked.

Anything.

Anything.

Anything.

Ever on the earth.

You know what I mean?

Whatever.

And you chose pumpkin.

All right?

So let's start over and not use.

We're starting to complete.

So this time, don't use previous words so that you can, you know.

Okay.

Bobby, I have a question.

How about the three of us try to explain this to her

real quick by using the game?

Okay. Why don't we do that?

First, you have

to talk directly

into the microphone.

Then, you must explain to

the audience that we

are not that

smart. I really like this podcast.
So one last one. Yeah, let's do one.
Just get giggles. But I want Rudy to start it.
Yeah, you have to start it, Rudy. Okay.
One. Time.
I. Eight.
Uh. Pumpkin.
That's the story. Andrew, I knew you were going to say pumpkin.
Yeah, I do too. I love how Andrew is so smart.
He's so present. It makes sense.
It makes sense, man. I'm sorry.
That was my first explicit CD. Oh, I loved it, dude.
I love that. And they had five different remixes on there.
Remember that? It was like the original, the club mix, the radio cut. Andrew, one second.
I think it's been more than 60 seconds since it's been about Bobby. So, Bobby, is there something you want to do to kind of get more comfortable? I swear to fucking God, man.
I swear to fucking God. You know what I was doing just now? Yeah.
I was, in my mind, I'm like, you know what? I'm going to let these two have their little moment. Yeah.
Right? Little moment. And for you guys to call it back to me is so fucking rude my friend yeah that's rude right i want to say something go ahead both of you and i mean this to the fans that are want to know the truth i did get covid uh we kept it a secret for privacy purposes we talked about it pretty openly uh on my other podcast and uh i got it from a friend of a friend sitting outside having a beer.

It sucks.

It's a bummer.

But I will say I want to thank you both.

Genuinely, you both were very helpful.

Kalilah was unbelievably sweet and brought a bag of stuff to my house.

I fucking brought the bag, you fuck.

Bobby, Bobby, Bobby.

Let him just have his gratitude.

I can't even get this out.

I can't get one nice thing out with you. Also, fuck you for not letting your girlfriend just have a win.
Yeah. Andrew, go ahead.
I'm sorry. Bobby, this is for you.
Andrew, go ahead. So, Kalilah dropped off a bag of goodies.
That's nice of her. Bobby was smoking and playing video games while he was driving her.
And Rick and his girlfriend Betty were so sweet and giving

and constantly checking in to make sure everything was okay.

So I want to thank my friends for being there for me during a shitty time.

And Bobby, now you can have your thing, say your piece or whatever.

Go ahead.

Go ahead, Bob.

I'm feeling so many emotions right now. By the way, I called Bobby three times in the past two days to talk one thing about business and one thing about life.
I should show the text. I can send it.
He literally just goes, I'm in AA. And I wrote, cool, would you mind calling me when you get out? No.
Shut up.

Shut up.

And then he goes, then the next day I call, I say, hey, man, can we chat?

We need to chat about something.

And he goes, I'm in therapy now.

Yeah.

I said, cool, can you call when you get out?

Nothing.

This was my favorite.

Can I read you an interaction you and I had that made me laugh?

Yeah.

All right, so you were very excited. You go, how cool was this? And you sent me this video, right? Yeah.
About the Rubik's Cube. First of all, it's going to play at the beginning of this episode.
It was the way that we opened this episode. It's amazing.
It's amazing. And I really loved it.
He made a bad friends thing, Rick, with like a thousand-some-odd Rubik's Cubs. Yeah, I've seen those art.
It's amazing. It's incredible.
Yeah. I sent it to Bobby and I said, how cool is it? I didn't text you back and then you texted me after that, you go, also, merch killed it.
Because you're sitting in your bed, I can imagine, sick, in your COVID thoughts, you know what I mean? And your body's tired. And so you go, huh, he didn't respond to, how cool is this? Well, I'll add more information.
Also, merch killed it. Right? And I waited as long as I could.
why did you make that his voice i don't know that's just what i and i waited a couple hours and i might expect you would make me laugh i go who dis who dis i said oh how did that feel when i sent that angry no i didn't get annoyed oh you didn't okay good no because it's who dis is one of those jokes that like losers use that don't have any sense of humor that it's been around for so long and so many like um hacky loser um douchebags who dis yeah who dis um okay yeah so it did make me mad I just I just thought what a hack what a shitbag hack. Yeah, put on your glasses.
Put on your rose-colored glasses, because the world doesn't look so great, okay, without them. Bitch.
Loser. Bitch.
You're a loser. Bitch.
Oh, man. Andrew.
Andrew, dude. I'm a fucking loser.
You're so funny. I'm a fucking loser, huh? Dude, you're so funny.
You're the writer, man. Andrew.
Andrew, dude. I'm a fucking loser.
You're so funny.

I'm a fucking loser, huh?

Dude, you're so funny.

You're the writer, producer, star, and Bobby's Stimpy.

You know, it's so funny because in many landscapes, this would be called bullying.

Yeah, in many.

In other landscapes, it would be called standing up for yourself.

Really?

A five foot two, fat, small, with a lot of disability. Oh, fat, but you wear a small? That was a very good callback.
If you want to actually see the sizes, just go to rigglastman.com and check out the store. There we go.
So, you guys are bullying me right now, and I'm going to take it. I'm going to take it for the team, right? I think um i got too much rest last night what do you mean because i came in here with a lot of energy and right i was singing i was singing you know i mean back in the in the car i was back in the chain game i was excited to get here right right and as soon as i got here and we started i've just been kind of like um out of it why i don't know something about the energy it's like you know it something about the energy.
It's like it's making me sweat. I feel like there's three different things going on at the same time.
It's a whirlwind of energy and ideas, and I feel like I'm being ganged up on since the beginning. I believe that.
Which is completely fine. Which is fine.
First of all. First of all.
I believe you. The only reason I said something negative to you just now is because you made fun of the text exchange that we had.
So I was retaliating against you. I said something sweet about what you and your respective girlfriend did for me.
And then you made fun of my text response because I'm laying in bed. You're right.
So I retaliated. So here's what I want to do.
Here's what I want to do to sort this balance out again. I'm going to step back for a minute.
I want you two to take over the show for a second. And I want to enjoy and watch for just a moment.
Okay. But before we even do that, can I do something? What do you guys think? Andrew, before you tune out for a second, can I say something Alright And I'm gonna be Milking it Forget the You're just calling me Why are you calling me Just pick up Oh Hello Hello Hey how's it going I don't know I just feel like I'm I don't know I just feel I don't know I don't know There's so much going? I don't know.
I just feel like I'm...

I don't know. I just feel...

I don't know.

There's so much going on

that I just feel defensive

and I feel, you know,

that a certain presence

has taken over.

I'm not saying Ricky.

I'm just saying

he brought other, like,

Jewish ghosts with him

or something, right?

Hold on one second.

I'm getting another call.

Hold on one second.

Hey, Rick.

What's up?

Hey.

I took my another call.

Hold on one second.

Hey, Rick, what's up?

Hey, I took my headphones off. I can hear what you guys are saying,

but it's probably boring.

So I was just seeing if you had any nudie mags

or something that you could explain to me.

Yeah, no, I was just checking in

to see how it's going over there.

All right, call me back.

Do you have nudie mags that you could explain to me

after you talked about it?

100%, 100%.

I'll call you right back.

You fuck.

I'll call you back.

Get on Pornhub.

Thank you. I was just checking in to see how it's going over there.
All right, call me back. Do you have nudie mags that you could explain to me after you talked about it?

100%. 100%.

I'll call you right back.

You fuck.

I'll call you back.

Get on Pornhub.

I don't know what's going on here, but I have to say something.

Can I say something to you, to everyone listening?

Of course.

All right.

And I've probably said this before, but years ago.

Hey, Jules.

Hi, how are you?

I'm good.

How are you?

How's it going over there?

Just checking in.

It's kind of messy.

Are you enjoying it at all?

Is it fun or no?

It's okay.

Okay.

You take care and be safe, okay?

Okay, you too.

Bye-bye.

Okay, bye.

Sorry, what's going on? All right. So years ago, I told you the first time I ever saw you, which was me and our other buddy.
Yeah. Okay.
We were in the OR, and we saw you perform for the first time. And we both looked at each other and said, this could have been 15 years ago, I don't know a long time ago and now a long time ago and we looked at each other and we i remember distinctly going wow that guy's really funny and then when i met you i just knew right away that i was i was gonna know this guy for a very long time and there was a time in my life where i you know had nothing going on so i decided to just try to you know things on my own.
So I did this talk show on the internet on YouTube called Talking with Bobby Lee. And I have to say that the one – I asked you to do it.
You showed up and you did it for me. I think our episode was one of my favorites aside from my brother and I did a really good one.
And ever since then, I was just like, you know, I really love this guy. In fact, you know, I don't go to birthday parties and things like that.
And one time you had one at the bowling alley, remember, and I showed up. You did.
I showed up. And the reason why I showed up is because of the fact that I go, you know, I don't show up to anybody's shit, but it's like, you know what I mean? I'm going to do this for this guy because I really like this guy, right?

And then, you know, I've had, you know, so many offers from other, you know, podcast people wanting to do a podcast with me.

I'm being real.

I know.

I know.

But as soon as, you know, and I've hurt a lot of people's feelings, right?

Yeah.

By choosing you.

But the reason I'm choosing you because of how I feel about you.

You know, I think we have good chemistry. And number three, I trust you, right? And I think that you're a really good dude.
And when I found out that you had coronavirus, it broke my heart and I felt bad for you.

And it was a very sad situation in our household.

And, you know, I've been I don't really get on my hands and knees and pray, but I'm doing internal prayers for your safety.

OK, thank you. So for you to fucking, you know, I mean, say this bullshit.

I'm being very careful.

I'm not.

No, it goes, Rick.

No, it goes.

For you to be sick right now. Right.
Yeah. Makes my heart break.
Thank you. What I'm being very careful.
Here it goes. I'm not – no.
Here it goes, Rick. Here it goes.
For you to be sick right now, right?

Yeah.

It makes my heart break.

Thank you.

Is what I was going to say.

Thank you.

Okay.

And I love you.

I love you.

Okay.

So that's the truth of the matter.

Thank you.

So when you call me shit-gourd, right?

Mm-hmm.

And when you do all these little things, right, to hurt me.

Yeah, when you do that face. You know what I mean? That ching-chong-y face that you just did.
Right? It's like, it burns. Because you seem to think that I'm like, you know what I mean, some sort of fucking predator or some, you know what I mean, some parasite.
I'm not. No, I know.
I'm a good dude. I love you.
And I'm just trying to make this podcast work. And I'll have to be honest with you.
We've had my brother do it. Tom Segura do it.
We have Ricky here. And we're doing everything we can to keep this thing going while you're sick.
Right? You guys are doing a great job and I really do appreciate it. Okay, so I don't know what's going on here, but it's like, I think we're fine.
I just want to tell you we're good, and I love you.

Will you and I ever be as pleasant to one another that is equal to the amount of respect that we actually have for one another?

All right.

You know what?

You're right.

You know, I'm a bully.

Because you did come in bullying me, and I was in defense.

You're right.

I'm a bully.

I'm in an away court. You're right.
I'm a bully. I'm in a way court.

You're right.

I'm a bully and I'm going to, you know, I'm going to change my tune now.

Thank you so much for doing this podcast.

I'm sorry if I let Andrew down.

I'm talking.

I'm fucking talking.

Right?

Don't do that again.

Yeah.

Racist.

All right.

It's racist, but it's also annoying.

I think that you i i oh fuck don't worry about it no it's fine i have to get it out i'm aware i have to get it out um you know it's like when when we're at the comedy store and you're trying to get in and you're coming up to me, right, trying to get Adam Egot's ear and I go to bat for you.

What do you think that is?

You mean when you talked to him?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Six years ago?

No, I've been doing it.

You know what you mean?

Two years ago, I would meet you in the parking lot and you'd be like, no, this was – I'm not going to get into semantics and I'm not going to catch myself being defensive.

So I appreciate you.

But I will say this.

This room... Yeah.

The stage was set.

Set.

We came in prepared.

What happened?

Everything's fine.

Nothing happened.

That's what I'm asking. Yeah.
Everything's great. Nothing happened.
I don't feel satisfied yet. We're not done yet.
Okay. You think we're done? How much time have we done? Five minutes.
We've done five minutes. No, I think he's saying there's five minutes left.
No, five minutes. We've only done five minutes.
A usable show. remember going to um you mean me and joe cory were pitching a show right and then um joe cory was like you know saying you know bobby and i have a good stand-up comics and and one of the executives looks at me and goes wait you do stand-up comedy to me right and i go yeah yeah you know and it's like it burned but it's also one of those situations where it's just in retrospect

okay to me right and i go yeah yeah you know and it's like it burned but it's also one of those

situations where it's just wait in retrospect who cares who cares and it's also funny you know

it's the funny like i can visualize it would have been a great scene in a show you know i mean where

you could see me blush and try to be defensive you know i mean so it's just like one of those

things where you it's life it's like that in every aspect of life.

Joe is Joe Coy has the most not humble Instagram I've ever seen.

He's on like private jets and he knows how to that guy knows how to show off, baby.

Yeah, it's insane.

That one that one video.

I mean, he's a friend of my very good friend of mine, so I don't want to say too much.

But I'm not being mean. I'm just saying he really does like to flash like he's a very good friend of mine, so I don't want to say too much.
I'm not being mean.

I'm just saying he really does like to flash.

He loves to flash.

He's a star.

He's a star, and he worked really hard.

We all work really hard.

I know, but not like Joe Coy, dude.

All right.

Did you sell out a theater in Hawaii doing four shows when you were taping a special instead of two just because all the Hawaiians wanted to see you? No, dude. Joe Coy, dude, he's got action figures.
He's got T-shirts. I don't know when this is coming out, and I feel like I don't want to put this out in case he isn't open about it yet.
But he's selling buses next year. Yeah.
Joe Coy tour buses. It's nuts.
I think in many ways, though, he has – it doesn't seem like it, I guess, from the outside, but he's humbled himself personally. You know what I mean? Like if you talk to him, he's all about like staying in your lane, living in the moment.
When he says staying in the says staying in the lane does he mean like in his ferrari in his lane is what is he talking about no no what i'm saying is is that like because i have i have a thing where i compare myself with other people yeah and there are times where i go well i got that and how come this person got that and he's just basically like just you're doing what you're doing and just stay in your you know lane he does have a grateful like his personality type he is grateful for what he has and has done in a way where it's there's something refreshing about being around him yeah where he like you you my opinion of him he came and he did my podcast i didn't know him very well i've since gotten to know him but he acts he acts, and this is such a cliche, I guess, of my projections,

but he doesn't act like he's successful.

Yeah, that's what I say.

And he appreciates other things that, like, somebody who has accomplished as much as he had.

So there's something about Joe that as much as he is like, look at this stadium that I sold out with boys to men for some reason,

there's something very great about Joe.

So I'd like to say, Joe Coy, here's to you. Here's to you.
And also, he's a good father. Which is the most important part.
I'm being real. He's a great dad.
His son loves, they have a great relationship. A lot of people say I look like his son.
In many ways you do. Thank you.
And so he's, you know, there are others I could talk about that bother the fuck out of me. You know, I have a story that's similar to you pitching a show.
When I go to the comedy store, I often get carded. I get carded.
Do you really? I do. It's happened numerous times.
And the first time it happened, I had a conversation with myself that happened in about two seconds because I know how to talk to myself fast. But here was a conversation in my head.
I'm so mad. I want to go home.
I don't know if I'm embarrassed, but I don't want people seeing that this is happening. This guy has probably only been working here for a few months.
He doesn't know who I am. The best thing you could do is just give him your card and say, have a good day.
No, you lash out. I didn't.

I'm very proud of how.

And by the way, I've been carded there numerous times.

Are you being real?

I'm being.

Now you go to a L.A. comedy club and the doorman who happens to be a comic.

I answered the phones there.

This is post television shows.

Right.

So they're like, excuse me.

What's your ID?

Now, what's your reaction at first?

Well, the first time.

That's reenactment.

The first time it happened.

I'll tell you.

The first time it happened, I'm with John DeWalt.

OK.

I don't know who that is.

Johnny Boom Booms.

I'll see you next time. excuse me, what's your ID? Now, what's your reaction at first? Well, the first time it happened,

I'll tell you, the first time it happened,

I'm with John DeWalt, okay?

I don't know who that is.

Johnny Boom Booms.

I love Boom Boom.

John, who doesn't do stand-up anymore,

my first thought was, John, be cool.

Because, you know, we're an extension of each other when we're there.

Yeah.

So I didn't want him to be like,

fuck you, my ID, I'm a co-producer on,

you know, whatever the thing is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Which is, I I get the energy so you're at the store, I'm a doorman and I just walk past you because I'm not expecting you to stop me so you have to stop me I'm going to buddy, buddy listen, where's your ticket where's your ID, first of. Yo, why the fuck are you carding him? Why are you carding him, bro? John, chill.
Who are you? I need to see your ID as well. First of all, I'm a co-producer.
I'm un-dateable. Just give me the ID.
In the improv, just give me the fucking ID, man. Okay.
Rick Gleeman. Rick Gleeman.
And okay, you're of age.

Do you have a ticket?

No, I'm a comic, dude.

Oh, open us on Sundays.

I know.

I'm just coming to watch.

Some of my friends are here.

I hope that's not a problem.

And that's how you do it.

Yeah.

But I maintain the eye contact.

At some point, they might go, it doesn't matter.

What if they go?

That's never happened.

The closest I can say that has happened.

And this one bothers me. Because, because first of all i did work there second of all i'm the guy

yeah yeah okay so when i'm when i when i'm there on a who gives a fuck night when it's not sold

out a wednesday at 10 yeah okay and i'm sitting in the back bucket seat okay maybe my mom's in

town and we're here to see we're here to see brent and andrew it's embarrassing okay now i'm

Thank you. and I'm sitting in the back bucket seat maybe my mom's in town and we're here to see we're here to see Brent and Andrew now I'm sitting in the back bucket seat with my mom and the other three bucket seats have nobody in them then whoever the fuck who goes by the way who I guarantee you three days earlier at the open mic would have been doing this this hey i just watched the uh vice president debates hey uh flies the flies you could tell how bad the vice president he's a piece of shit and he's fumbling over his fly jokes you hack fuck he comes over to me taps me on the shoulder okay he says hey man paid regulars only when i want to say, my mom's almost 70, you cunt goof.
My mom's going to sit here.

Nobody's sitting here. I'm sorry, you have to go.
You have to go. And then I have to tell my mom, hey, mom, I didn't make it.
I didn't make it. We can't even sit here.
You have to stand. You're 70.
You have to stand. You know who's going to sit there next?

Somebody's dog.

That bothers me. You know, listen.

It doesn't matter who it is.

Okay.

She's great.

She's great.

I'll tell you something.

The dog gets more respect than me.

Right.

I have a story for you, you fuck.

Wait.

I thought you liked me.

A year ago.

One year ago. I go to the Laugh Factory.
The Laugh Factory! I walk in the front door. Some guy, a doorman, he takes his arm and he goes like this to block me.
One of the doorman with his suit? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Careful how your arm is like that.
Yeah, that looks like a Heidel Hitler. No.
He didn't do this. Well, he would have if you were taller.

I know.

He went like this.

He goes, wow, buddy.

Whoa.

All of your impressions sound like Tommy.

It was Tommy.

No, he goes, whoa, buddy.

I go, whoa, whoa, what's up?

He goes, ID, dude.

To me.

Right?

ID, dude.

And I go, all right, I'm leaving.

And I left.

Right? And I still haven't been back. How long has it been? A year.
I will not go. Nope.
It's disrespectful. But the truth is, the truth is if he doesn't know, what could he have done to know? Should he have looked at all the headshots of the people? Like should he study that portrait that's outside the lab factory? It's my stupid ego.
So you think you're wrong? Yeah. Not everyone's going to know everybody.
I know. But Andrew, and I'm with Rick on this one.
The bucket seats is different than the door. Dude, number one, I'm sorry, but I was eight years on a network sketch show, right? I'm a regular at all the clubs in new york and all the clubs right i have like every room a room in america right yeah and i have you know at this point you know i mean i had a pretty good podcast i mean there are just certain things that and also the laugh factory it's like i'm very good friends with the owner of the club.
He's flown me.

Him and I have gone to Hawaii together and New York.

Sick.

Right?

My point is that at this point, it was just like when he did that, I was just like instead of going into a confrontation of some sort, I just decided I'm out.

Do you think that was the right decision?

I don't know.

I'm asking.

No.

I think you give him your ID and you say, hey, man, you don't know who I am. I just want to introduce myself.
All right. I fucked it up.
All right. That's what I do.
All right. But the bucket seats.
It's okay. It's okay.
People don't know who you are. A lot of times, the door people are comics.
And they're new. And they're new.
And so they may not know. I made up the story.
What? Yeah, I made up the story. One time.
I made up the story. Why? I'm sorry.
It wasn't funny. I have no idea why.
One time I was going. I was trying to get into the Hollywood improv.
And they didn't know who I was. I don't know why I did it.
I hear you. I'm a liar.
I'm a liar. I'm a liar.
I'm a liar. It's funny to find the intention.
My guess is you were trying to connect through a joke. Yeah.
Like you're trying to say, like, I hear you. Here's what I've gone through.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then you still went, no disrespect, but I was on a fucking show for eight years.
I committed to the whole thing and I just, I fucked it up. Man.
I read the situation wrong. I committed to this fucking line of

thinking and then it just didn't pan out the way

I thought it was going to pan out. And then I didn't

know, should I just let it go? In my head I was like,

I should let this lie go, right?

But I go, no, I'll just admit that

I lied. And now it's even weirder than it

was before. I think it was hilarious and good and I'm glad

you came clean. Oh God, it made me laugh though.

I'm so sorry. Go ahead, Andrew, tell me your improv story.
This is a nice table. It's great.
It's mahogany. One time I was trying to get into the improv.
Can I ask you guys a question? Yeah. Rick, by the way, I was just fucking around before.
It's me. Yeah, I know it is.
You guys have, both of you, have successful podcasts. Two, at least, each.
Do you feel, now that stand-up is on, not happening, do you feel that you have lost something because of what podcasts offer your stand-up, or do you feel that because there is no stand-up, these podcasts are so much more valuable? That's a real question. Does that make sense? Yeah, I don't really think of it in those terms.
As far as creativity. I don't think of as podcasting as even work or something that I have to do.
It's something that I enjoy doing. No, I understand.
So it's like I don't really put a lot of – I mean I value the people that listen and people that love us. I really have a connection with them.
That's what's great about it. I think my connection with podcast fans are greater than any other fan base that I could ever have because they know who I am.
And when I meet them via on the streets or when I communicate them through means like social media or whatnot, there's a different kind of interaction that we have. They know things about me.
Like how's Gobi, your dog? They know things about me so there's a deeper you have would you have a successful podcast if it weren't for stand up?

Bobby, what is it?

Would you have would your podcast be as successful if it is if you didn't when you started to have stand up to meet the people face to face throughout?

If you never did stand up and you only did the podcast, would those fans feel the same way?

Well, if I hadn't done standup and then did podcasting,

I don't think I would have a fan base

because everything is interconnected.

Right?

Everything in my,

right,

Andrew?

Don't you think?

It's like,

how the fuck am I going to,

the reason why I did a,

when I did a podcast

that I had some viewership,

right,

is because I did have fans

from previous mediums.

Right?

So the, you know, mad TV fans or fans from all these, these variety of other things that I've done. Hawaii Five-0? I've never been on that.
Weren't you on Hawaii? Mac and PI. I didn't mean any offense.
I'm not. I didn't take offense.
I just didn't know what you meant by Hawaii Five-0. That's all.
All right. So, you know, but do I miss doing stand-up? I do.
But I'm just accepting my reality like everyone else's on planet Earth. Thank you.
Andrew, do you feel the same way? Please don't ding that again. Because I feel Andrew feels differently.
I feel Andrew misses stand-up in a different way. I'd love to hear it.
And, Andrew, would you like to do a couple of minutes? I would love to. I miss stand-up very much.
I'm really sad. I'm supposed to be out this weekend somewhere, and sadly I couldn't do it because of the Rona.
And if I'd like, I could do a couple of minutes right now if you guys would like. Is that okay? Yeah, go ahead.
All right, here we go's great to be here uh how you guys doing yeah this is awesome right on thank you so much for coming out it's good to see you guys we got uh what do we got a little brown chick a little uh little bowl of noodles and a jew uh you know what they say a brown girl a noodle bowl and a Jew walk into a bar and they end up owning the bar

having You know what they say, a brown girl, a noodle bowl, and a Jew walk into a bar, and they end up owning the bar, having the family run it, and then selling it a couple years later for a pretty good profit.

Crafty. I like this guy.
I hate that the podcast started when it did Because right now I feel like I feel like I'm in the pocket with you guys Stay in it By you acknowledging it though It kind of ruins the momentum But you calling me out Kind of ruins the momentum of it I'm'm being positive. You're being objective.

Okay.

Touche.

Go ahead.

It's good to be here.

It's good to be here.

So, yeah, you know,

bad friends, bad friends.

Yeah, at first I was like,

I wonder why they call it bad friends.

Then I watched the show.

These guys are so bad, it makes...

I'm sorry. Watch the show.
These guys are so bad, it makes... It makes...
The Lakers and the Clippers seem like good friends. I like this guy.
He's crafting. That's why you're not a regular at the store.
True. But you know where I am a regular?

Where?

Nobody.

I know.

Nobody has me.

Nobody wants me around.

No, that's not true. No, it's true, Andrew.

My own parents, you know what they said to me the other day?

What?

Get out of here.

I went home for the holidays.

My dad's like, I'm glad you're here.

Get out of here.

Where's the food?

Get out of here.

Ricky.

Andrew.

I want you to keep this conversation moving with Jules.

I want you're here. Where's the food? Get out of here.
Ricky. Andrew.
I want you to keep this conversation moving with Jules. I want you to introduce.
You didn't even get to really talk. You guys never really got to know each other.
Andrew, do you have any direction on how you'd like this to go, or does it not matter? Typically, you just pick up the baton and run with it. You got it.
How long have you been running track? How long have you been running in track and field? I am not in track and field. Perfect.
This is the kind of girl I like to pick up a baton and pass it to. Now, question.
When you decided to be part of this family, did you feel excited or nervous or some other feeling? the first day i came here i was just i was i just came here to look after tito bobby that's what the tikalila told me look after him how um because of covid because he's um oh to watch make sure that he's being clean yeah and then tito bobby just suggested that i should join and then i just said okay. I love that.
Well, it's nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, Tim.
Thank you. Bobby, what are you doing? You make the environment difficult to survive in.
That's your superpower. you struggle in life so much that you're able to bring everyone down with you.
And I resent it. Okay.
That was a really good segment. Are you going to edit some of this out? No.
I want people to have the full context of why I'm... No, no.
You have coffee in your hair. I know.
Okay. Seriously, dude.
The first five minutes and the last five minutes, I haven't felt this feeling in a decade. A lot of times, you know, people, when they're driving, they like the awkward...
Like, for instance, you ever see the David Lynch movie Lost Highway? Love. That's a great movie.
But you can't really understand really what's going on, do you? But there's such a disconnect. Right.
But when you're watching Lost Highway, there's just certain things in the scenes that don't really match up. And there's also – David Lynch has a way of like if you watch a movie like Erasure Head where when two people are having a conversation and there's a 30-second gap of them just sitting there and you can hear like the pipes.
You know what I mean? I like that feeling of awkwardness. And that's what this podcast, especially this one, is giving everyone a sense of unease.
Right? Yeah, I guess. And I think that that also is something that's entertaining.
When people – see what you're doing right now. I don't know what you're doing.
I wasn't going to throw it at you. I know, but just stop picking things up when I'm talking.
Kito Bobby, I have a question. Go ahead.
How did you first met Rick and what was your impression of him? I didn't like him at first. No one does.
No, honestly, I didn't like him at first. At first, I was like...
Well, first of all, it's like... I think I auditioned for a show that you...
No, no, no. Yeah, when I found out that you got undateable, and I couldn't even get an audition, right? I went, fuck that guy, right? And then I'd see you around the store, and I'd never, you went to Montreal before I even went to Montreal.
So when I found out you went to Montreal I was like, what the fuck? That guy went to Montreal? He's not even a regular at the comedy store. And so then in the beginning it was like, but then what Rick does, he's kind of like a tick.

Yeah, a tick.

Like a wood tick.

A tick that you would find in New Hampshire.

A wood tick.

Like a wood tick, yeah.

And you're going to get Lyme disease, so you might as well just go in the forest.

Huh?

Yeah.

So he was just around, and it's like I'm like a lumberjack in the New Hampshire forest, and I'm just accepting the fact that I'm going to get bit by this thing, right? And he bit me, and I started getting the Lyme disease, right? And my body started aching. I couldn't sleep good, you know? And I realized that— Are you feeling better? Yeah.
I mean, I'm living with the disease, but my point is is this it shows um you you're infectious you know and you're you slow that came around yeah and i realized that this thing this tick we're not going to be around did you just fart is it corona fart yeah yeah funny stuff, man. Yeah.
You know, Kalilah and I are starting a podcast. I was funny what I would have to give you right now.
If we, like if you were in that room, would you smell that fart or no? If I was in the room, would I have a choice? And that's the philosophical question. You see, a lot of people choose, should I smell this fart or should I not? Yeah, I know what I mean.
That was the wrong. You know, it's like I donated.
Let me just say something. I donated money to that guy running against Lindsey Graham, Jamie Harrison.
How much money did you donate? $650. I'll match it.
Andrew, you want to match it? And now I'm getting. I made a mistake by the donation, my cell number.
Bobby, why did you do that? Why did you donate $650 to somebody? Because I want Jamie Harrison to beat Lindsey Graham. And so the money is going to help Jamie Harrison beat Lindsey Graham? Well, I don't know.
I mean I just wanted to do something. I wanted to donate so that they could have some – Do you ever donate your time instead of money for this of money? Do you ever help out? No, I don't.

I've never once?

No.

But now I'm getting all this other...

First of all, he emails me.

I'm sure everyone gets it every five minutes.

Good, Bobby.

I know you gave me $650.

I know it's not personal.

But it's like another $150.

It's constant, man.

I'm getting texts from him.

Awesome.

I have another question. Go ahead.
For Andrew. Go ahead.
When did you first met Rick? And what was your impression of him? Yeah. Rick and I met through stand-up comedy many, many years ago.
I do remember exactly where I met you. At the comedy store in the original room.
Yes. I just saw you go up, and I thought you were so funny.
And I was friends with Brady Matthews at the time, and I didn't know who you were. And then you were in the back, from the stage, the back left, when you walk and you turn right.
And you guys were there, and Brady looked like he owned the place, because I'd never seen somebody put their foot up on a chair there, because we're all new. And he puts his foot up, and you were just sitting with him, and you guys were holding court and one of you guys did a joke or whatever and you guys you know like i i like brady by the way yeah yeah same guy they uh you guys took me in i don't know if it was like i felt like an outsider but i did just move there and it felt nice not just to be like hey come on over and do bits but i had already seen you and like this guy's so super funny so i just always associated you and brady together for the longest time and then uh i've known him for a long time too yeah very long both from chicago yeah did you and adam ray have a falling out because you guys were together all the time and then you guys are doing stuff together and all of a sudden you guys weren't well we were living close to each other at the time and also this is what happens in comedy people have said that to me before i was like no we it's just you stop seeing people when you when you don't live within like five minutes yeah it's really hard to see people anymore so we just kept doing our own thing and when your schedules get busy and you're doing other shit it's really hard to see your old friends anymore i mean especially the pandemic has really put something into perspective genuinely i'm being serious and especially with this virus like it's i talked to dr drew about this they're they're having to explore how many people suffer from anxiety and depression because of the virus outside of the physical ailments because it does really fuck with your head like you get extremely isolated and you don't really want to talk to people about it because it's kind of fucking annoying and it's a stigma.
And then you also get super depressed because you're like, when am I going to not be sick anymore? And then you think about other people that are around you that might've gotten sick. It just, it spirals a little bit.
So you begin to isolate a little bit and it gets, it gets weird. It does get a little strange and it, it's kind of what the pandemic has already been doing to people, which is like pushing us further and further away from each other.
It's, it's really fucked up, dude. It's the psychoanalysis of what's going on now will be interesting to see in 10, 20 years from now.
Andrew, you said something that, that sparked a, sparked a thought is my, and I've been living in a pandemic since before this thing hit, and it's gotten tougher, but I've been forced to interact with people because of the podcast, and I have to say that I have been connecting with an hour-plus-long conversation with new people, but mostly friends, because of the podcast and if it weren't for the podcast i think i would have lost my mind i wouldn't have talked to anybody so i this medium and as much of a clusterfuck as this is it's nice to get out of the house to get dressed up to play with you to play andrew i've seen you more since we did my podcast earlier this year and then yours. And then we've taken walks and we've talked in this.
I've seen you more. And I think a big part of that, not by choice, but just by situation has been because of podcast.
Yeah. Yeah.
And there's something really cool about I miss so much going to clubs when we're all there. And the more successful you get, the more you're doing your own shit.

So podcast has kind of done that.

So I just want to say thank you guys for having me.

And I really am sincerely grateful of being able to play with people

every week because of this.

I have to admit, too, that little brief...

I went to Whitney's house last week or whatever,

a couple weeks ago,

and I saw Lederman,

and I saw Pavinsky, and I saw all the girls. You girls you know what I mean oh I saw your Adam Ray friend my friend as well he was wearing the Dr.
Phil clothing funny stuff it was an open mic at Whitney's house he wore the prosthetic Dr. Phil stuff for the open mic there was five people there I go what the fuck are you doing I know I'm just doing the open mic I go that took nine hours but anyway it was really good to see all of them for some reason I felt joy and I think also I feel the same way thank you for being a bad friend Rick I want you to look directly into your camera you're single there and way.
Thank you for being a bad friend.

Rick, I want you to look directly into your camera.

You're single there. And just say thank you for being a bad friend very seriously.

Yeah.

Could I do it now?

Do whatever you want, yeah.

Well, I have two things to say.

Okay.

First, thank you for being a bad friend.

And second, live from New York,

it's Saturday night!