LA Riots 2k20

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I'm the son of an Atlanta City police officer. My cousin is an Atlanta City police officer, and other cousin East Point police officer.
And I got a lot of love and respect for police officers down to the original eight police officers in Atlanta that even after becoming police had to dress in a YMCA because white officers didn't want to get dressed with niggers. And here we are 80 years later.
I watched a white officer assassinate a black man. And I know that tore your heart out.
And I know it's crippling. And I have nothing positive to say in this moment because I don't want to be here.
But I'm responsible to be here because it wasn't just Dr. King and people dressed nicely who marched and protested to progress this city and so many other cities.
It was people like my grandmother, people like my aunts and uncles

who were members of SCLC and NAACP,

and in particular, Reverend James Orange,

Mrs. Alice Johnson, and Reverend Love,

who we just lost last year.

So I'm duty-bound to be here to simply say

that it is your duty not to burn your own house down for anger with an enemy. It is your duty to fortify your own house so that you may be a house of refuge in times of organization.
And now is the time to plot, plan, strategize, organize, and mobilize. It is time to beat up prosecutors you don't like at the voting booth.
It's a beautiful fucking speech. It's an eight-minute speech.
It's gorgeous. I know, but...
But he's getting certain amounts of criticism because people are like, you know, when people go, stealing isn't the answer, and looting, and then it's like if you feel

a You know, when people go, stealing isn't the answer and looting and then – I mean it's like if you fill a balloon up with water, right? Eventually it's going to pop. Yeah.
It's just an action reaction. It's science.
Yeah. Right? And that's where we're at in this country.
Yeah, the balloon popped. The balloon popped.
So it's like if the system did the right thing, we would not be here. It's as simple as that.
Yeah, but that's fucking – you're talking about a long, long time. It's very – but it's a simple thing.
You charge, as soon as that happens, Derek Chauvin with first-degree murder. Yeah.
Right? You prosecute those four officers, Rodney King. That's why the riot started.
Mm-hmm. Right? It's that simple.
Yeah. If you just did the right thing.
Right away. Right away.
Yeah. No riot.
Yeah, no riot. But here's the problem with the riots is like – that's what he's saying as well as like I'm in support of people fucking just getting out their anger because of the voice for the voiceless but what Mike is trying to say is like don't burn our neighborhoods we need to get together and by the way both sides are right like I agree why Mike is saying like please let's like protect ourselves because let's not hurt our community more but anytime somebody burns something I'm also like yeah let it burn fuck it I don't know that's how you that's how they're getting out their fucking frustration.
What are you going to say? Go to a shooting range. Go go break something outside.
Like what's the right way for them to fucking be mad? So that's why I agree with both people. I agree with Killer Mike and I agree with people going to light target on fire.
Fuck it. Whatever.
What do you do? I too see both points of view. And I'm not I don't even necessarily I'm supportive of writing.
I hate it. No, no.
I don't want to it. I don't want the city to be on fire.
I mean I saw footage of this older African-American gentleman during – I watched that, yeah. You know what I mean? Telling kids, yeah.
And he's pleading with them like I worked so hard I mean? I came from the streets too. Stopped burning my shit.

It's heartbreaking.

I read in your face the sadness.

Even when you're like – when I'm talking.

Okay, I'll tell you why.

When I'm talking.

Because I'm really bummed out about this stuff.

I know.

When I'm talking, you have this little smirk, but your eyes are sad.

Yeah, I'm really empty.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm sad right now.

Yeah, yeah.

And they're dark and they're sad like a little clown.

You know also why?

Yeah, why? Why? Because I feel like I should say something about what's going on outside of our show like on social media. And other than Twitter, I haven't put anything on Instagram or anything.
And I feel like I'm supposed to but I don't know what to say. And it just comes to a point where we all – whatever your ideology is, we're all on the same page.
Who else am I trying to convince? Because the other side, whoever that other side is in the issue, we're not going to convince them of anything. So you're just touting to people that are on your side.
Echo chambers. Yeah.
So it doesn't – who cares? Why would you – for me, it's a given that George Floyd, him getting murdered is an atrocity and it needs to be stopped. But people – But what am I – who am I trying to convince? No, people would argue that you need to say something so people – so more power is brought to people by voice of saying like I'm also against this.
It just – it helps. I think it helps in the grand scheme of things.
It's's like when somebody says voting doesn't matter that's the dumbest shit i've ever heard in my fucking life but vote doesn't even count no your vote does count you it does count and you should keep voting just because it's a good example to set for the next generation because as soon as people stop voting then we have to get rid of the electoral college of course that to be of course but in that to be true of course in the meantime for meantime, you still need to vote. Because you're setting an example for someone like her who won't vote.
She can't vote. Her age range.
Right. When they start voting, they'll start going, fucking who cares? My argument toward that, though, is we're a product of our environment, right? And the people that are going to vote one way are always going to vote that way.

You're not going to sway gun-toting, Confederate flag-waving right-wing people.

Let me play devil's advocate.

Go ahead.

If 99 of those people who are staunchly against your belief system out of 100 and one person is on a weird weird fence, and they grew up that way, but they may not agree with everyone around them, and they see your post and they're a fan of the show, maybe, maybe you change their opinion. Maybe make an argument on that.
Okay. So I'm playing, back to Warzone, but I play with a kid from Georgia.
He lives in a small town. He doesn't live near Atlanta.
And his family, everyone around him are staunch Trump supporters. They're staunch right-wing people.
And he – because I play with him all the time. He's going to move out here.
In fact, Tiger Bell, we might hire him as a – we love this kid.

What's his name? Ramey. Ramey.
And he goes, I don't know, Bob. I was just born in this environment, and I have always been into anime and into ethnic causes and liberalism.
And everyone – my dad, my mom, everyone, my sister, everyone around me are huge Trump touting. You know what I mean? And he goes, I was just, I don't know what it is.
I was just born this way, right? So what you're saying to me isn't true. I just think that there's some people that are just born even no matter what environment but it's like

my parents were very

Koreans are very racist.

And they would say very racist things.

And I just remember being at dinner

going, I don't know

why I'm that way. I don't know why

they didn't influence me.

But I, as a kid, just looked at

the world around me and went this seems like the right thing to do. And this set of things is the wrong thing to do.
And I don't care what people are saying. I think you're just born that way.
No. No.
You contradicted yourself by saying you are a product of your environment. You are a product of your environment.
I did contradict myself and I tried to double down.

The point is

you can change people.

You can?

People who are on the fence

about how they really feel,

maybe they grew up

a certain way,

whether or not they grew up

a righty or a lefty

around people around them,

the only way for them

to gather more information

to make their choice

on what they like

is through stuff like that,

through social media

to being like,

hey man, check out shit like this.

This is the first time. The only way for them to gather more information to make their choice on what they like is through stuff like that, through social media to being like, hey, man, check out shit like this.

This is a way to inform you about how I think the world works. And then you decide I agree with this.

I disagree with that.

But if you go, I'm not even going to try to reach out to those people.

Well, what do you mean?

It's worth it.

It's worth it.

I don't think so. I think it's worth it.
I think putting your hand across the aisle is very important. I think because if you just go, I'm this way, you're that way, fuck you, then we don't get anywhere.
But if we do the thing where we go, hey, let's have a conversation. But that's not what you're saying.
That is what I'm saying. No, because when you tweet your point of view on there, not everyone that listens to me –

Is not reaching your handout.

That's not true.

Not everyone that listens to me is a fuck it.

You think all of my fans are all liberals?

That's impossible.

Of course I have fans that are Republican.

Yeah.

We have fans that are both people.

Yeah, you're right.

That's an insane idea to think that all I'm yelling at is one side.

No, but I need all my fans to know how I feel about issues. Whether or not they agree with me, I'm still going to voice my fucking opinion.
I'm going to say this is right to me. This is wrong to me.
And it's not a fuck. This isn't about Trump.
This is about me saying, here's how I feel about this fucking guy getting killed. This.
I feel about this this way. Yeah, you know.
I mean the bigger issues like Trump or like fucking your party, that's a whole other thing.

But about this, we should be saying something about it.

Yeah.

It's important.

I have to learn as an entertainer to express my opinions and not take comments personally.

Yeah, why?

I don't know why I'm tied to comments.

When I look at someone like Tommy Lauren. Is that her's that her name tommy lauren tammy the girl ralph lauren no the girl that's right wing blonde girl oh oh oh uh tommy yeah lauren whatever that fucking i don't know yeah tommy tommy she expresses she says crazy shit yeah and then i read all the thousands of comments of her you cunt and all that stuff right they do i know and and i i think to myself there's no way she reads this she does but how does she she loves she does she's she probably i want to get to the point where i love negative things no because i because then if i if i wasn't attached to people's criticism or people's point of view, if I wasn't attached to that, then I would be able to say whatever I want to say.
Like do what Michael Rapaport does and just go on these tangents. I want to do that.
But that's not who you are. But I'm so afraid.
You're not going to do what rap does. That's a very rap thing to do.
You do the way that Bobby does it. Right.
you're just not like them and you don't need that negativity because it's where people that eat negative stuff that it fuels them yeah that's sad yeah i don't want that shit around get the fuck out of here with that shit yeah yeah you want to be negative take a fucking walk don't don't then don't be around me i don't need your bullshit you look good by the way what do you mean mean? I like the color pop. This orange and the trim

on there and this yellow hat. You two are

bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

A white dude

and an Asian dude.

You two are disgusting.

You two are something.

We're bad friends.

It looks good. You know why?

Everybody going to the

party. Have a real good time i want to say that uh we had started yesterday we started yesterday we did a whole thing we did a whole thing yesterday and then we went oh we cannot air that no we cannot air that because it was like we were um just in a a spot it was bad spot.
It was a very bad spot. We did a bad – we can talk about it.
We did a bad Reddit AMA that we did – both of us didn't really like. We didn't like it.
It's just those things are not – they're hard to do. It's hard to be like I have to type as fast as I can and we both are – Not only that.
It's just like Brendan Schaub is a good dude. Well, they were trying to – yeah, they were trying to – Yeah, Brendan Schaub.
Let me just defend Brendan Schaub. But wait, let's give it context.
People that don't know. We were on a Joe Rogan subreddit that – should we mention his name? Who put us on that? Everyone knows.
Okay, everyone listen, okay? Out of the Bad Friends organization, who would put us in a situation where it's not good for us? Let me tell you something, Bobby. Bobby.
Let me tell you something, let me tell you something, Bobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
George threw us into a fucking Reddit. I'm trying to help you guys.
I'm trying to create content and trying to expand our horizons. It's like, what? Tell you something, Bobby.
it's like an old car starting up

so we did that

and then we have to answer

questions a lot of the questions had to do

with Brendan Schaub they were all trolls

if Schaub you know

if Schaub was fucking your girlfriend

what would you do it's like what

film it I don't know what do you want me to say to that stuff

first of all I wouldn't do anything I would laugh

I would break up with Kalilah and I would move on

if a guy that big did fuck your girlfriend in front of you, oh, so embarrassing. You would laugh? No, no, no.
I'd just be heartbroken. Why? Because then it's just a big, big penis ruined it forever.
That's it. You can't go back in there after that.
Bro, ask Kalilah about my fucking machinery. I know about it.

I've seen it a thousand times.

It's delicious.

You know what?

When you go to like a milk tea store or a boba store, it should be a topping.

Yeah, Bobby Dick?

Like boba.

You know what I mean?

Like inside it.

So you want sprinkles and then you want taro.

You want taro, boba and Bobby Dick?

Bobby Dick, yeah.

And Bobby Dick for you?

And it's like, it's chewy.

It's chewy. Yeah, it is.
It's dark like boba. You have a really dark penis.
It's – well, you know. That's what I'm saying, dog.
No, no, no. Wait, speaking of nudity – But let's go back to the thing though.
Okay, okay. So we started yesterday and – Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Don't roll your eyes. No, no, no.
I'm whole – the trolls. I'm thinking about all that bullshit.
Yeah, so then that's – we had to answer those questions and it put us in a bad mood. And then we started and in my head I was trying to go, how do we talk about this George Floyd? How do you do this? Yeah, how do we bring it up? I was so angry about it and so like just – and so like just hurt and emotional about it.
And then so I just in my head came up with like different ideas of trying to spark something and it just came out wrong. No, we all – we just couldn't meet – we couldn't meet on it.
But what we just said at the beginning of the podcast I think is, look, we'd be remiss to not talk about what's going on. It'd be stupid.
People come here to listen to us because they want comedy and us to have fun. We do too.
But we'd be stupid to not mention that we're fucking bummed out. It's a little...
It's difficult. It sucks, right? This is a fucking shitty time.
It's also crazy to think that we kind of forgot about the pandemic, right? Dude, it's really weird. The pandemic has kind of taken a backseat because people need to get out their fucking anger.
Like the pandy had to sit down for a while. Yeah, I think – let me ask you this.
I don't know this for a fact, but it's just a question. Are the numbers going to spike because of the pandemic? No, no, no.
That's not what I'm – I hate when people do that. My mom used to do that.
I do it to you all the time. I don't like it.
That's great. I'm going to keep doing it.
Do you think that you should go take a shower? No. You should.
I know. Your mother said that for a reason.
I know she did. But do you think that because the country was in quarantine for a couple of months and people financially are in trouble and you have all this pent-up rage along with seeing a murder on camera.
You think the combination started it or do you think there are different issues? No, I actually agree with that. I was talking to a friend about it the other night that I think this was going to happen regardless, but I think the pandemic amplified it.
People are frustrated. People that aren't making money right now.
You're hurt. You're hurt you're mad you're angry you see this this was going to happen anyway but it was like the pot boiled over no i think i think ahmad it started there as well yeah right because remember they didn't arrest those dudes right away right that in itself because remember that with that, you're like, what? Yeah.
And then two weeks ago that happened? Three weeks ago? Three weeks ago, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
And then this happens. It's just the cascading effects.
Yeah. Yeah, and it's like, it was inevitable.
Yeah, this is what, it's inevitable. It's gonna happen.
So my message to law enforcement is, number one, don't do that. Obviously.
Obviously. Yeah.
Don't do that. Don't be a piece of shit.
But if you have one John Wayne-y kind of like character in there, right? I'm not – What are you – No, I'm just saying. If somebody does do that, which I hope that we've learned our lesson.
Oh, that we prosecute them immediately. You fucking prosecute them right away.
Immediately. Immediately.
Yeah. It should be like the same day.

Look at the tape.

But it's them protecting their own. That's what I don't like as well.
Well, here's what I'll say is like there's been plenty of cops that get online that say this is disrespecting the pledge that they took. There's a lot of people have been – a lot of cops have voiced their opinion being like this makes us look awful.
The people that take an oath that do the right thing. Dude, I have cops in my family.
they get disgusted and embarrassed by behavior like this because they've done the right thing as much as they can for so many years right they they go they do what they can and they try to be a member of the the service and a part of the community and then when cops do shit like this it makes them all look bad and then my family members get thrown into this thing and so immediately they have to be a part of a thing without,

they can't,

they're not certainly not going to say like,

I'm not like that guy because to them,

to the,

to,

to,

to people that are mad about it,

they all,

it's all,

they're all the same.

Cops are all the same to them.

They're all bad people to them.

And look,

they're,

they have a right to feel that way.

But at the same time,

there's plenty of cops out there that are saying this is not okay.

These motherfuckers need to be shut down immediately.

They need to pay for what they did. But those cops, nobody wants to hear them right now.
Do you know what I mean? But I have to say that I can't say who it is, but we, as the Lee family dynamic, we have somebody very close to us, almost a family member, who's a LAPD police officer. Is Eric Griffin a LAPD cop? What? Yeah.
You have someone in your family who's a cop? Yeah, and... Do I know them? Yeah, you know them.
Oh, shit. But someone in our family member, and he is in riot gear right now downtown.
He hasn't been home in a couple of days. And he – I have to say – I don't want to say his name, but politically he's on obviously our side.
He's liberal. He's the most appalled when he sees police officers act that way.
Not because he's a police officer, but he just knows the rules, right? And there's just ethics that he applies to his profession. Yeah.
And he sees something like that, and it destroys him. He cries.
Of course. And he really is – I love the guy.

He's a good dude.

He comes over more than you or anybody else to check how we're doing in my family.

And so I know –

That he's hurt.

No, not even – I know there are police officers out there that are really good, nice police officers that do the right thing. Of course.
Right? Of course. In the LAPD 50 years ago, you could probably say that most of them are the worst people on planet Earth.
Yeah. But now I think there are a lot of – Times have changed.
Times have changed. Yeah, but we still – But you still have these rogue guys and I think it's – as a police officer, I would just be like – if I was in the precinct, if I even saw somebody, you know what I mean, get written up, right? I would pull the dude aside and go, hey, man, that's it, dude.
Yeah. We're not friends.
That's it. We are done.
Yeah. That's it.
That's your last, you know. Well, especially being a minority, if you're a minority officer working with white officers, there's a whole other dynamic that happens there.
Like that's a whole other thing of like how they handle situations together like Tom Tom or whatever the fuck his name. That Asian dude.
Yeah. He stood, I mean, he stood there like he was fucking.
I mean, I know dudes. I mean, listen, okay.
I know that kid probably was an incel. Tom Tom? Yeah, Tom Tom.
You know what I mean? Derek Chauvin's partner. Yeah, his buddy, yeah.
You know, he's probably, you know, Oh, I become. Okay, do it.
We're allowed to make fun of a piece of shit. Yeah, piece of shit.
I don't know. I get no pussy.
You know what I mean? I have no friends. Yeah.
You know what I mean? My uncle and my aunt, they're all scientists. You know what I mean? Or whatever it might be.
I don't know what it might be. But I get no pussy.
I, yeah. Right? But, you know, I love I love True Crime TV.
Yeah, I love True Crime. CSI.
I love CSI. And The Mentalist.
Yeah, The Mentalist. Bones.
I love Bones. I love Bones.
What a good show on good so underrated right he goes like maybe I become poorish officer right right so then he joins the academy yeah he joins the academy right yeah he's smaller right and you know what they link him up with turd chauvin I can't believe you know what I mean I get linked up with this guy white guy John Wayne John Wayne right and so they probably tease him around the precinct yep right yep hey hop sing you know what I mean yeah do you make any arrests today you can't because you're 5'2 hey Kim Jong-un did you pull anybody over yeah. Did you pull anybody over? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, there's shit all over. And he also laughs at those jokes.
Because he has. I finally people walk me.
Yeah. Right, and then the incident happens.
Because you see the photo that he has. I saw the video.
Look at the photo. But the photo that they show online.
Yeah. Look, this is the photo.
Look at me. You don't have to look it up i want to do a side by side of you in his face what's it how do you spell his name i don't know tom tom i don't know tom tom but um and so he's probably sitting there going like if it was me which i would never be in that position but if it was me i'd be like I'd fucking put my Derek in a headlock

and go what the fuck are you doing? What are you doing? Asian cop. What's his name? You know Rudy.
Do you know? It's T-A-O. Here it is.
Tao Tao. Hold on.
We'll do a side-by-side of you and Tao Tao.

What a fucking...

What a piece of shit.

He's acting like...

What's going on?

You know, this fucking asshole.

I have no idea what's going on.

Bobby.

Let me say this.

We're fine. We're not cutting this out because I don't feel...
No, no, no. I want to say this we're fine we're not cutting this out because I don't no no no I want to say this we're trying to bring a little bit of lightheartedness to a terrible fucking human being and this guy's a piece of shit for standing by and he deserves he deserves to be fucking thrown down to the bowels of hell for watching a man kill another man so we have to make fun of this fucking piece of shit because it's the a minority too.
How the fuck? How do you stand by a white dude killing another minority? I cannot. Did you see this fucking piece of shit from Mississippi? The fucking mayor who was like...
Oh my god, this piece of... Oh, this piece...
Hal Marks. Did you see this guy? Hal Marks.
Did you see this guy, the mayor? No. Hold on.
They removed his tweet. Oh, what do you mean? The Mississippi mayor? They removed the tweet that he had.
It's gone? It's gone. Wait, why? He deleted it.
No. Yeah.
Because I had it on my Twitter. Yeah.
Look at this. You no look yeah well mississippi mayor that's i retweeted oh you don't have his actual tweet though i didn't see anything unreasonable if you can talk you can breathe look at this fucking look at this fat piece of shit of garbage so i said i tweeted uh step on his neck if you it.
That's hilarious. And did anyone comment? Yeah, I got a lot of good comments about it.
Good, good, good. Yeah, people, no, but look at this fucking, you know what? Somebody had the funniest comment to me, replied to mine and goes, this guy's got a lot of nerve talking like that when Leia killed his father with a...
Can I just say something? It's a job of the hut, 100%. No, I have a question for you.
What friend of ours, right, if they took a I can turn white pill would turn into that? Just throwing it out there. If there was a pill that you could get out of the gas station, I could turn white.
I'm not saying it. And they immediately take it.
They transform into that. What would it be? Just the skin color would change.
I'm not saying it. I'm not saying it.
Fuck this guy. Fuck that guy.
Fuck this guy and fuck people like him. If you can breathe, you can.
Yeah. If you can fucking talk, you can breathe.
We're not editing that out either because I've helped that guy out. Yeah.
Okay. That's fine.

No, his Twitch channel, right?

His Twitch channel, when I'm on it.

Yeah.

And he just thinks, listen,

he just thinks,

we're not going to tell you who it is.

They know.

They don't know.

They know.

But I'll just tell you what he said today.

Today he goes,

it's early,

but I want to thank you

for streaming with me on occasion.

It does help.

And my channel is building up.

I bitch and fun and complain, but I appreciate you.

Can I read it?

Can you open it up and I can read it?

Why?

Because I want to read it like I think he sounds it.

Like it sounds.

Okay, okay.

But you don't know who it is.

Yeah, I do.

All right. it sounds.
But you don't know who it is. Yeah, I do.
It's early. But I don't thank you for screaming on occasion.
It does help. My channel's building up.
I bitch, I fun, I complain, as you say. But I appreciate you.
Kill your bullshit now! Love you, you little fat dwarf fuck. Yeah.
Yeah, he's a sweetheart.

We know.

We love him.

We love him.

We love him to death.

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Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates Pet Injuries and Additional Coverage and Subject to Policy Terms. Now, I'm not going to ask you this.
Why won't you play Warzone?

I download a Call of Duty on my phone.

And I try that for five seconds.

I'm even getting to the point where I'll give you money.

How much?

To buy a PlayStation.

How much?

Whatever a PlayStation is, I'll buy it online and send it to your house.

How much are Playstations?

Rudy, do you know?

Also, can I say this? Do they have PS5s already? I have to stop saying stuff like that. PS5.
Ooh, can you buy me a PS5? What I realized about our friendship is... Look at how pretty that looks.
I know. What I realized about our friendship is you say you're going to do something and then you don't follow through.

True.

That's your character defect.

Yeah.

And there's two things that are very important to me that you said you would get involved with but you just don't.

And you say it.

What were the two things?

Well, how long have we done this podcast?

15 weeks.

Right.

Korean spa.

Yep.

The pandy.

No, even before that. There was like three weeks before and we were both on the road.
Doesn't matter. Okay.
All right. Do you want to go to the spa now? Do you want to go to the Korean spa now? So that's one thing which makes me go – I don't know if he's – I think he's – I'm going to let that slide, but that's fucked up.
That I won't go to the Korean spa with you? I'm the type of guy that if you have to be impeccable with your word.

And when you say something

that you're going to do something, you fucking do it.

Like if I said, hey...

I said, you promised me that you would play

Warzone. I will.
No, you won't.

Why do I have a timetable? Why can I do it whenever the fuck

I want? Because the pandy is eventually, it's now

ending. You're not going to have the time.

You're a busy man. That's right.
Right. I told you I will and I will.
You won't. I don't know when it's going to happen, but it's going to happen.
I want it to happen – And side note – This week. So you're a man of your word.
So when you say it's going to happen, it's going to happen, right? Yeah. So when you say like let's show up for 2 o'clock to shoot and then you come at 2.56.
Okay, but can I say this? I'm just – I'm just saying that there are elements that you're not aware of.

What happened?

Number one...

You slept in.

No.

Kalilah texted me.

So, yeah.

Kalilah texted me.

Go ahead.

You pointing at Rudy?

Go ahead.

Yeah, yeah.

Did you not have yoga?

What time did you end yoga?

Two. Okay.
All right. Yoga, right? And then she had – did you take a shower afterwards? Yeah.
Because you get what? Because I was sweaty. You're sweaty.
Was Bobo up at two? Yeah. But like just getting up.
Just getting up. That's right.
It's – You know, there was something that you did yesterday, right?

Yeah.

That you knew that you were going to get in trouble for.

I told you.

No, no.

There was something yesterday that you knew you were going to get in trouble for.

And I said, you know what?

I'm not going to rat you out.

I told you.

Have you ever seen a mafia movie?

A movie about the – it's about –

Trust, loyalty. Exactly.
Family. right? You have none of those qualities.
You're a rat. Give me your sandal.
Give me your left one. The left one.
Yeah. Here.
Look at this. Look at this.
Yeah, I know. Can we buy her new sandals?

I see her play with them sometimes, and it blows my mind.

It blows my mind.

It's just that her feet... So she has impeccable morals, but her sandals don't matter.

No, what happens is because she gets hairy feet...

Oh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Her feet are gnarly.

So the hairs rip this?

Rip through it.

Wow.

Wow.

So... All right, give me that hand sanitizer.
I'm tired of your, yeah, give me some too. Just for no reason.
She doesn't side with me ever in the house. No, I know.
I see it every time you come into here. She really doesn't.
She's obviously not on my side. Why aren't you on Bob's side? And here's, oh, I hear something that she didn't think I was going to bring up, but I wrote it down in my notes.
Hold on. Let me just do this real quick.
It smells like the beach. Okay.
We had to go to the vet, so we went to the vet for our dog, Rami. Just listen to me.
And so we go, we have 30 minutes because we dropped off the pet. We have time to get milk tea or boba.

Yeah.

So we're trying to Google places around.

We go, okay, we found a place nearby.

And we call.

We go, hey, can we preorder?

We would like, me, I would like a Thai.

Thai iced tea?

A Thai, yeah, a Thai iced tea.

Oh, so good.

And then this girl goes, can I have taro?

Taro?

Have you ever heard of it?

No.

Okay, exactly.

So then they go, no, we don't have that.

And both Filipino girls in the car went,

No, shut the fuck up!

This happened, right?

So I'm just like, just order something else. Maybe something that they have on the menu.
Yeah. Right? Yep.
No, we're going to call somewhere else. So they call another place.
Do you have, we'll have one time. Taro? We don't have that.
We don't have it. They freak out.
Oh, my God. You know what I mean? So then we find a place that's like 30 minutes away.
Yeah. Right? They go, yeah, we have it.
Probably in the shed back in the storage room. You know what I mean? We have to dig it out.
Yeah. And then I go, I just turn around.
I go, why can't you guys order? Something normal. Something normal.
That everybody has. I got Thai, right? And she goes, Uncle uncle tito taro is more popular than thai where exactly not here bitch back home is taro is like very popular yeah what is it it's ube yeah what is that what's ube is it a fish what is it no it's the purple It's a squid.
It's the squid's left eye. Goob it and goob it.
Is it a fruit?

I don't know. I don't know, but it's the flavor, the purple thing.
The purple thing. No, but maybe I have had it.
I think I know what you're talking about. I know what taro is.
Taro is a fruit, I think. Yeah, I think it's a fruit.
It's a fruit. Yeah.
And I know what it is, is but it's not the debate is what's more popular thai iced tea exactly everybody has everyone everyone knows that right you know i've never had boba in my life oh you should try it dude i got it one time yeah i'm not kidding yeah and the smell of whichever one i got grossed me out so much i couldn couldn't do it. Boba has no smell.

This one did.

I don't know if I got a flavored one or something, but this was not.

It smelled nasty.

It smelled like it went bad.

You know when milk goes bad, it smelled like that.

Yeah, but you know what Boba is, right? Yeah, little squishy balls.

Yeah, but it's rice.

I know, but the smell of the drink made me nauseous.

Oh, yeah, but it's not the Boba that was smelly.

I know, it was the milk.

Yeah, whatever.

Go to a nice place.

I did.

I did.

I did.

I did.

Anyways.

I'm not going to have Boba, though.

Thank you. Oh, yeah, but it's not the boba that was smelly.
I know. It was the milk.
Yeah, whatever. Go to a nice place.
I did. I did.
I did. I did.
I did. Anyways.
I'm not going to have boba, though. So did I win that argument? No.
See, they don't. And here's another thing that happens in the house is that everything's my fault.
Today they called me. Today they go.
I was talking about Andrew Schultz. Yeah.
And how. It too and he's gonna be a very big talk show host you know I was yeah of course he's very talented he's gonna have a great career great career and then they they look at me these two and they go yeah you would too but you're too lazy I think Kalilah said it first and then I said it then I said only at home that's really mean it's really fucking mean first of all Bobby's an actor a stand-up comedian he has two very popular podcasts what do you do? what the fuck do you do? what the fuck do you do? The house that you live in? Alright? Was it built on lazy bones? Was it built on doing nothing? Huh? What? I only said only at home.
Only at home? Only at home. That's his place of rest.
It's quarantine, lady. You got a lot of nerve talking like that.
You have a lot of fucking nerve, woman. You got a lot of nerve talking like that, Rudy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is really not okay.
You know what? House chores now? You're doing all of them. You're doing all of them.
All of them. The trash? You.
You. You're doing the trash, too.
You. And you know what? You're going to take out the trash even if there's nothing in the camp.
Yeah.

You're just taking it out just for exercise. I mean, I can't believe your mouth and your mindset right now.

Young lady, I am disappointed.

Disappointed in you.

I'm disappointed in you.

And this is what I need you living with us.

Well, that's not okay to say.

Yeah, because if I had an ally,

well, you're going to pick up your phone and play your little game again?

You're going to text Auntie Kalilah?

She is.

Oh, Uncle Tito and Uncle Andrew is mean to me. I'm not.
All right. What are you playing? Nothing.
Okay. She was playing a game.
I know. I know.
That's what happens. I just can't, you know.
Tell me why you really said that, though. Was it just because Auntie Kalilah said it? Or did you say it because you mean it? Be honest.
I said kind of lazy. Kind.
Yeah. What does that mean? Sometimes that he's lazy.
Alright, get closer to the mic first of all. Just pull it towards your feet.
Yeah, you can sit how you want. And so what are some of the lazy things that I do? Just be honest.
He leaves all of the plates everywhere. And when he eats it's like I don't know, he throws food everywhere.
He throws it when he eats? I don't know. Like he eats and it just gets messy? Yeah.
And you have to clean it? Yeah. Does Kalilah clean it? No.
You do. Mm-hmm.
But is that lazy or messy? Lazy and messy. It's both.
Why is it lazy? Because after he's done eating, he doesn't...

He doesn't put it away.

That's not...

You misunderstand my behavior.

It's a misinterpretation of my behavior.

What would you like him to do?

The reason why I do that, right, is I'm eating.

I purposely spit things out.

Like if I have a piece of bagel... If you don't like it? No.
So she has to clean it. I really do.
I know. I'll take peanut butter off of my bagel and just smear it onto the table.
Because you know she's got to clean it up. Because it's like we feed her.
You do. You clothe her.
We clothe her we clothe her shelter right we take her to san francisco did we not take you to san francisco yeah but you weren't there i think a lot of that i'm grateful they're a unit there we're a unit this is a family have we not taken to seattle Yeah. Okay.
Was I there at Seattle? All right.

So, you know, it's like... unit.
This is a family. Have we not taken it to Seattle? Yeah.
Okay. Was I there at Seattle?

Alright.

So you know, it's like I'm going to smear a little peanut butter

on the table. So you got to clean it up.

Clean it up a little bit. That's all.

That's just a life lesson. You think you're a slave?

No. Okay.

Are you upset? No, you seem upset.

No. Oh.
Okay.

Do you

sometimes hate Bobby?

Be honest with me. This is the opportunity to say something i want you to be i want you to voice your frustration does he ever do stuff that really hurts your feelings or pisses you off only when he buys a lot of things when he buys stuff yeah because like food and then i have to like sanitize it and put it all

and put it away

but who

do you get to eat

three days in a row

do you get to eat

some of the food

yeah

sounds like a tree dog

yeah

I purposely

order

like

be honest

we had six pizzas

come in

frozen pizzas

huge ones like this

I know I saw

the next day

another six arrive

you have no fucking

room in the freezer

you have 12

frozen pizzas in the house

oh we have like 15 now

Thank you. We had six pizzas come and frozen pizzas, huge ones like this.
I know. I saw.
The next day, another six arrive.

We have no fucking room in the freezer.

You have 12 frozen pizzas in the house?

Oh, we have like 15 now.

What?

Right?

From different companies around the country.

Sure.

Right?

And then she has to – I could see her take all the stuff out of the freezer and try to organize it.

And still we have no room, so we have to give some of them away.

Yeah. Right?

But she thinks that I'm just doing it.

Just?

Just to get her mind to just get crazy. is there a piece of it that is true oh yeah i do yeah i have fucking all kinds of stuff coming you constantly are ordering shit oh yeah we you know we ordered pasta the other day was it good no and i don't want to be meaning call out the business but i bit down down and back here.
It was hard Corona. No, no.
What was it? I go like this. I spit into my hand.
Right? Ow. Back of my gum is cut.
I look down. It looks like a piece of plastic.
Oh, my God. I start getting grossed out.
I'm like, dude, what if I ate a bunch of what fell in the pan while they're cooking it? Yeah. I call the place.
I go, hey, man, I just want to let you know. I just paid a bunch of money for all this food.
Yeah. And now I'm grossed out.
I don't want to eat it because I don't know what the fuck is in there. You're one of those guys? Fuck yeah, dude.
No way. I don't know.
Oh, you're one of those guys? No. No, no, no.
Yep. I said, I just want you to be aware.
I don't know what was in it. So now I'm weirded out.
Why can't you do this? Go, okay. There was like a lady's earring.
No, no, no I said I don't want I just want you to be aware I don't know what was in it so now I'm weirded out why can't you do this go okay there was like a lady's earring no no no it was like little pieces of stuff oh yeah multiple pieces what if it was some dude's filling out of his mouth his tooth yeah he's like it's in the back flies out and I got grossed out and I told her I said I'm not why don't you just not order from that place again and why do you have to make a call to get money did you get you get money back? No, no, no. I just wanted to let her know.
I said, I don't know if something broke in the kitchen, but something's in there. And she goes, well, we'll refund your money.
I said, I don't want the money back. Okay, good.
I'm letting you know I'm not going to eat it because I'm – something's in it. You should look with your cook to see what might be in the fucking – what if other people's shit is like that now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm just being conscious for her. Yeah.
I was not mean at all too. I was like – I never mean to them about that stuff.
to them about that stuff i worked in a restaurant i understand but i was like hey man you could get in some fucking trouble if some someone chokes on some shit that fell she goes talk to the chef he was cracking um clam shells and he thinks it's pieces of clam shell that got in there and i was like okay that's your order clam shells nohells? No. Oh, gross.
Yeah, see? I was like, that shouldn't be in my fucking mouth. You don't want shit that you didn't order in your food.
No matter how delicious. It's fucking gross.
If I'm, like, listen. But this is the shell of the clamshell.
It wasn't even fucking clam. Look, you can see it cut in the back of my mouth.
Yeah. I was bleeding because I was like, what the fuck? It was sharp as fuck because he had cracked it and pieces had fell into my fucking pasta.

So Callan and Schaub, I don't understand.

Boo!

Go ahead. I don't understand the upside of them doing the road.

Granted, their point of view about, you know, I'm an American and I want to exercise my right.

You know what I mean?

No one's going to tell me what to do.

And this whole thing is a hoax, whatever it might be. But it's just in terms of logistics and the upside.
There is none. We should call him and make fun of him.
I should call him and just to make fun of him. But it'll go to voicemail.
He always leaves on voicemail. Shab will pick up.
Yeah. Are you going to call him to see if he picks up for you? Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's mean. That's mean, but it's probably going to work.
I'll call Schaub on this line. We'll see who gets who first.
Yes. Brian.
Yeah. So annoying that you didn't answer my fucking phone call.
I literally that you were both together you're a fucking asshole I knew you were together I was I literally was like who is it my girl goes it's Andrew Santino and I'm stretching and then Bobby called and she goes they're together and I go yup what do you guys? What I'm saying, are you in Houston right now?

Yeah, I'm in Houston.

You couldn't hear it?

You couldn't hear it?

You mean the audience applause?

That's right, brother.

The noise.

Hey, the rumor is you guys can't even pack a half room.

Andrew, Andrew.

No, seriously.

We read the Texas Gazette and it said,

these two clown farts from L.A. came in here, couldn't even sell half a room.
Nope, the Texas Gazette is a liberal magazine. They're left-wing pieces of shit.
So what's it like, Brian? I mean, are people wearing masks in the audience? Fuck no. Fuck no.
I was at a Latin bar salsa dancing amongst, oh, I don't know, 300 300 people this guy that you're talking to doesn't not only does he not observe the shutdown never has and i'm probably irresponsible for it oh no i'm not but also um you think after four months of being like not being on stage that i'd miss at least a b well texas gazette just said we hate, but he didn't miss a beat. Yeah.
So, you know, that's what happens. Right.
And that's fake news. Yeah.
But how is Frankenstein doing on stage? You know what? Bobby. Yeah.
How's franking franking. What?

Brendan is actually fucking crushing.

He's got a serious 20 minutes.

Are you guys sharing time?

No, Andrew.

I do a solid hour because that's what I am. You can't do a fucking hour.

Dude, I've seen you.

20 minutes of you is exhausting.

I don't know how people sit through an hour of your shit.

Guys, one thing we know for sure.

They're going to high kick your way right out of comedy.

It's a 20 minute bit about your thigh muscle.

We know two things for sure.

One thing is Bobby is actually Chinese.

The second thing we know is I am, without a doubt, the gold medal winner in comedy.

We know this, yeah?

Can I say something to you, Callan? Honestly, I watched a little bit of you on Whitney, on Whitney's show. Yeah.
Yeah. Boy, oh boy.
Don't go back on that. Hey, come on.
That was, dude, you were terrible. It was so, it was the worst podcast appearance I've ever seen in my life.
Hey, Bobby, when we did the podcast, you were talking about how you were molested and we were laughing. Yeah.
Somebody posted, why hasn't this guy been canceled yet about me because I was laughing. So thanks for ruining my career.
Well, don't laugh. You know, when we had a little conversation with someone about you laughing at his molestation, it's why your show got canceled on ABC.
What the fuck? That's exactly right, dude. They called us, Disney called us, the mouse called us and said, he's going to get canceled because he promotes molestation.
I wasn't laughing. Bobby was trying to make us laugh because he makes light of all kinds of things.
Are you doing meet and greets after the show? Fuck no. I would, though.
You would? I'm afraid to. Not allowed to, though.
Yeah. So are you booked? Now you're going to do more dates this coming next couple of coming months? Well, let's see.
I'm a man. So, yeah.
You guys, well, you guys take naps and drink glasses of warm milk and hold each other because you're afraid. I'm out there bringing laughter to the masses and making fucking bank.
I read a great post online that said, Byron Callen is back at it. Yeah, Byron Callen is back at it, out on the road, entertaining the masses.
We really wish some real comics wanted to get out there, but we'll take this stuff for now. That's what it said.
Andrew, that's not cool. I had so many of my audience, so many fans hit me and Bobby up and were like, you know, it's fine to take like the store, like the CVS brand, but we'd rather the original.
Like they really want the real thing. So they want the name brand.
They'll take you guys for now. They'll take the fucking store brand.
No, don't say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cause it's a little bit cheaper. I get it.
I'm only getting more getting more famous i'm only getting more famous if the three of us were in a car yeah and and it was firebombed and we all perished yeah it would say the great comedian brian callum friends let me tell you something you're the only one that wouldn't get out of that car because you'd be strapped into your seat belt we'd be trying to get you out of it and your little sore hip wouldn't be able to uh mobily get out during the fire it's not an age thing dude and you know when people say you're really showing your age yeah yeah byron you're really showing your age lately so when you debate byron when you debate donald trump in this next coming months i mean do you have do you have an agenda i mean you've been practicing yeah do you have anything lined up yeah i have been practicing and that is that i think chinese people like you look i'm just saying yeah yeah anyway brian thanks for picking up my phone call i appreciate it. I know now your feelings, your real true feelings toward me.
Thank you so much. And fuck the redheaded freak.
I love you. I know you're ethnically Korean.
We're going to cut this part out. We're going to cut that part out.
I knew why you didn't answer the phone for me. And we're going to keep the Chinese in.
I know why you answered the phone for Bobby and not for me. I understand.
I know exactly why. You know why, too.
Guys, guys, I did 100% without stopping. No, you know why.
It's because you're threatened by someone like me that's so young and talented and on the rise, and you don't care about Bob because she's old. You don't give a fuck.
You don't like the young guys on the come up. I get it.
No. I'm on a hit TV show.
I'm on a hit TV show. How's your show? Call Davey How's your show? How's your show? Whoa.
Anyway, Brian.

Brian, I love you.

Thanks for picking up.

You're the best.

Good luck on your shows, okay?

Miss you.

I love you.

I love you.

Bye, baby.

I want to say something to our fans.

And I mean this.

I'm sick and fucking tired of people watching our show every week and not subscribing to our shit.

It's the weirdest thing in the world that we have all these people that watch and they don't subscribe to the show. Yeah, because it only helps our show if you subscribe.
It helps the numbers. I don't understand.
It helps us keep going. We want to keep going.
I don't get it. Hundreds of thousands of people watch it and listen to it and then they won't subscribe to it.
I don't want to get it. Take other shows out of your subscription list

if you have too many.

Get rid of stuff like

Fighter and the Kid.

Get rid of that show.

Nobody likes that fucking show.

Get rid of D'Elia's show.

Gone.

Get rid of Whitney.

Gone.

These are all shows

you don't need to watch.

They're trash.

Garbo.

They're garbage.

This is the only one

that's worth it.

Yeah.

This is the only one.

The Sting and the Sting. Which one's that one? Oh, the guy and the girl.
Yeah, yeah, it. Yeah.
This is the only one. The Sting and the Sting.

Which one's that one?

Oh, the guy and the girl.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Don't listen to that.

Don't listen to that stuff either.

Listen to our show and that's it.

Yeah.

I can see the change.

Rudy, how was yoga?

I ripped one.

You farted in class?

In Cloud's face. By accident.
And then she hits me from behind. You farted in class? in Kaleida's face

by accident

and then she hits me

from behind

you farted in yoga class?

we have to do this

you know that pose

what's that pose called?

downward dog

it wasn't downward dog

it was like

almost a tripod

almost a tripod

and I had to bend over

and I ripped one

in Kaleida's face

and then she fucking

punched me in the ass

yeah

yeah but it wasn't like

I was like

I'm not an expert farter. Like, I'm amateur.
Yeah, yeah. I don't have my black belt, you know, so I can't do it at will.
What kind of farter are you? Are you a blue belt? I'm probably, I think I'm white belt fart. You're brand new? Well, not brand new, but like, maybe I got two stripes on the white belt.
Oh. I'm almost to get to what a yellow belt would.

You're close. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I'm almost there.

What belt would I be?

Probably yellow.

Yellow. Yeah, I'm pretty good.

But you're not black belt.

No.

You can't fart at will.

No. I used to know a girl that could.

Yeah.

In junior high, I knew a girl she could swallow air and fart.

Yeah.

I'm not kidding.

I know a girl that could queef that way. Same.
Yeah, yeah. Same.
I can queef at will. And then, I had a girlfriend like that.
And then sometimes she was on a period and she would queef in my face. No.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I could pretend I was in Fight Club.
You know what I mean? Right? Yeah. So, yeah.
Queefs are funny. Queefs are always going to be funny.'re always going to be yeah i always say i said i used to have a joke about it years ago that when you're having sex doggies down and and she queefs it's like you're moving positions and she queefs yeah it's impossible to not laugh i know it's impossible you don't But you don't.
You don't. But inside you're going.

No, you're doing the face.

You're doing the face, right?

Yeah.

You're holding.

Yeah.

And she's like, stop it.

Yeah. Stop it.

And you're like, I'm not.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Even your dick is like.

Yeah.

Or when you queef.

And so, yeah, when you stick your dick in.

Yeah.

And it goes like that.

Oh, my God.

It is humiliating for everyone. Everybody.
But it's like those old... The cameraman's laughing, right? The boom operator.
The squishy toys that we used to have as kids where you put your fingers like... You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like the gel things? Yeah. What were those? The snake...
Don't look at her when we're talking about stuff like this. No, no, I moved on to the toy.
Because we are going to get in trouble. I talked about the toy.
I'm talking about the toy. Yeah.
Okay, let's address it. Yeah.
Bobby got in trouble for saying gross stuff in front of Rudy, but Rudy's a legal adult and is okay with it. Can we get your okay on that? Yeah.
There it is. Well, I read a text today and I text a direct message or whatever from a woman and she's like, will you be nicer to her? What do you mean? She's like, be nicer to Rudy.
You're so nice to Rudy. I know, but the thing is, why? Do you think he's mean to you? No.
Do you want him to be nicer? No, he's already nice. See? Yeah.
I'm so kind-hearted. Who's this woman? I don't...
Someone on Instagram. Well, let's put her name out there.
No, I don't want to, I don't want to, I don't want to do that. But I'm.
Was it a white woman telling you how to live your life? She was an Asian younger girl like her. Oh.
And she's like, be nice to Rudy Breeze. You know what I mean? I'm like, what? I'm so nice to her.
Yeah, you are nice to her. Yeah.
We have, you know, she, when she first moved into the house during the quarantine, she wouldn't say anything to me. Rudy never talked to you.
For weeks, right? You would rarely say anything to me. She would go, good morning, Uncle Tito.
Good night, Uncle Tito. And that was pretty much during the day, nothing else.
Doesn't Tito mean uncle? Yeah. So it's uncle, uncle.
Yeah. Good morning, Uncle Uncle.
I make her say, she says Tito Bobby by color. I want her to call me Uncle Tito.
Yeah. But morning, Uncle.
I make her say. She says Tito Bobby, but I want her to call her Uncle Tito.

Yeah.

But then over time, she starts lipping off a little bit.

Yeah.

I like it.

No, she's shown her personality to me.

We've gotten closer over time now.

I really feel like we're family now.

Yeah.

And at first, she wouldn't look me in the eye.

Yeah.

That's probably because I'm the white devil to you.

But for the most part, now she's comfortable with me. You're much more comfortable with me now than you used to be.
Yeah. She was eye.
Yeah. That's probably because I'm the white devil to you but for the most part now she's comfortable with me.

You're much more comfortable

with me now than you used to be.

Yeah.

She was hesitant.

Yeah.

She was nervous.

But I don't think talking about

pussy farts is sexual.

No, we're making a joke.

It's we're kidding around.

Holy shit.

You think her and her friends

don't joke about that stuff?

Do you guys joke about pussy farts?

Yeah.

What do you mean?

Of course.

Like when people are surprised

that it's like

how do kids know that?

You're like what?

Do you not know what the internet is?

Yeah.

Go on fucking the internet

for ten minutes.

but Pussy farts? Yeah. What do you mean? Of course.
Like when people are surprised. It's like, how do kids know that? You're like, what? Do you not know what the internet is? Yeah.
Go on fucking the internet for 10 minutes. Everything is there.
Mind you, also, people listening, there's such a thing as dick farts, too. But the hole is so small, you can barely hear it.
It goes... No, it's like the...
Yeah. There's a little bit of air in there.
It goes... Like when you're squirting water out of your teeth? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So there are dick farts, but we would have to have put, you know, some NASA equipment to hear it. Did you watch the rocket launch? Did you see any of that footage? You know NASA and SpaceX threw a rocket into outer space this weekend? We did it in the 60s.
I'm not impressed. I agree.
That's funny. Right? Once we did it, we did it.
We did it. Get over it.
Get further. Yeah.
Can we go to another galaxy? Can we get out of the solar system or whatever? Yeah. But a rocket in the sky? Big fucking deal.
Kim Jong-un can do it. All right? He's done rockets galore.
How crazy is it, though, that now people used to wear suits and go to Air Force Base base and watch the watch them go off and it was like a it was like an event now yeah it happened and people on twitter were like okay and then moved on i bet you money you're on the moon as an astronaut and you're just like nobody cares like even you as an astronaut you're like oh this place again it's so great like open a starbucks yeah yeah how come there's nothing to do on the moon you imagine they both say

at some point they go

okay we did all the

gravity trick things

that we could do

you know

I think about all the

gravity fun things though

like blowing a snot rocket

at your buddy

and letting it float to him

yeah

while he's sleeping

just hoping it floats

right into his mouth

I have fantasies

of going

like being an astronaut

and then get drifting

into space

and getting caught

I don't know if we talked

about this

in the nebula

but I guess it goes further

and then all of a sudden i land in a um m-class planet right but for some reason i'm three times the size of everybody and the strength so there's humanoids there so so no but is are you your size now and everyone's smaller or you yeah yeah because Because I've been so small here on Earth that now I'm three times the size as everybody.

Yeah.

Right?

And I end up on like a beach and a tribe.

They don't know who I am, but they saved my life because I'm like an astronaut.

They take the clothes off.

And then these tribes are being hunted by a big like capitalist city. They get hunted as slaves.
But then I protect them. Oh.
Right? Yeah. And there's an uprising.
Oh, oh, oh, oh. So you're the leader.
You're the leader of this. No, of this little, because they took care of me.
I know, but there's a coup against the tribe that's owning them. There's tribes being hunted down, right? And I'm there, and there's an uprising, and I'm the leader of this uprising.
Of course. And then we take over.
Fuck yeah. Yeah.
And everybody bows to you. Well, then what they do is they build, in the fantasy, they build a shrine.
So I live there. And there's different kinds of foods that they deliver on these gold plates.
And then I get all the women, too. And the boys.
If their pussies are tight enough. Yep.
Yeah. I have all these.
Do you have fantasies when you like go to bed? I have fantasies in the shower all the time. Yeah.
When I go to bed, my brain's like kind of dead space and I can't really think clearly. But in the shower for some reason, I like black out and I think about all sorts.
I have so many fantasies. My one fantasy that I keep having over and over again is someone offering me a certain amount of money to disappear.
Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, like a guy comes up to me, like a tiny little Arabian guy.
Why Arabian? I don't know. Why Arabian? I don't know.
And he's like, I will give you $100 million to disappear forever. Yeah.
Because they want to replace me. They want to use the shell of my body and someone's going to live my life.

So then where do you go? I don't know. That's the best part.

They won't tell me. Oh.

They tell you where to go? Yeah, they tell you where to go.

What if it's like somewhere bullshit? Doesn't matter.

I got 100 mil. And they're like, you can't

come back. You're in Anchorage? Yeah,

Anchorage, Alaska. What?

And they're like, you have to be Fisherman. That's a Russian.

I don't know. But I want them to

offer me a bunch of money to go away forever and then somebody takes over my body and they're living my life because they're aliens. I thought they were Arabian, you fucking fuck.
Yeah, aliens. Oh.
No, no, no. But they have access to these aliens and these aliens...
Back up. There's Arabians.
Yeah. Who are also...
They're in conjunction or in cahoots with fucking aliens. Time out.
Time out? This is your fantasy. Yeah, I'm telling you.
Oh. They're so rich that the aliens have come to them and the aliens are like, you're the most.
I feel like you're making it up. Yep.
No shit. I'm making it up.
What the fuck? This isn't real. Oh, really? Yeah.
So this isn't really a fantasy?

No, it's a real fantasy, I'm saying.

No, I don't think there's a real fantasy.

I think you're making up the fantasy.

No, the aliens have found that these Arabian knights are the richest people. You would have said fucking aliens way before that, fuck.

That's a very important thing in the fucking fantasy.

The Arabians aren't aliens.

They have, the aliens have befriended them.

Right.

So they go, you have the most money, you have the most power.

Yeah.

How can we take over human bodies without them knowing that we're going to wear

their The aliens have befriended them. Right.
So they go, you have the most money, you have the most power. Yeah.
How can we take over human bodies without them knowing that we're going to wear their skin? But then the aliens, right? Angels are directing them too? No. No, the aliens are aliens and they're on their own agenda.
And then? Yeah. And then? Yeah, yeah.
And then? And then what? And then LA's on fire. It is.
LA's on fire. And, you know, were you here during the riots? No.
You were a kid, probably. Chicago.
How old were you? LA riots. 10.
92. I was, in 92, I was 20.
I know. Old man, take a look at my life.
I'm a lot like you. So I was 20 and I was working at a coffee shop.
But you were in Orange County. I mean, you were in San Diego.
I was in San Diego. There was no riots there.
No, San Diego. But I remember going home because I lived with seven people in a two-bedroom house.
Is this when you were in the band? No. No.
And I remember watching it on the TV, right? Just being in awe. But, you know, when Fairfax last night burned to the ground, it's five minutes from where I live.
And my brother lives on Orange. Yeah, he lives right down the street.
He lives right down the street. Just a little bit east of there.
I call my brother, are you okay? And he goes, yeah, I hear sirens and fire and helicopters and stuff, but I'm making fried rice. That's what he said.
And he is. And I go, what? Yeah.
Yeah, I'm just making fried rice. Are you okay? Yeah, he's fine.
Yeah, fried rice. Yeah.
Yeah, so that's what he's doing. He's going to be okay.
You okay you'll be fine you know and then we played a war zone until 5 in the morning we watched the news all night long I know you called me you freaked me out and then I watched some of the well dude I got a text message from Tim Dillon saying something like the improv was they were trying to set the improv on fire the place next door is called Double RL you know's they shattered all the windows and stole a bunch of shit and so they thought they were going to try to break into the improv because they were just breaking windows but they didn't because we have video, people drove by and they didn't do anything to it but you know what bothered me the most about all that shit? seeing white kids white kids breaking a bunch of windows and looting. It's like, that's not for you.
What are you doing? What do you mean? This is not your cause. What are you doing? If you're white and you're trying to march alongside black people for this cause, then you fucking march.
You don't start looting and breaking windows. What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? Don't do that.
You know, there's a part of me... No one should be looting, okay? But if a white kid is doing it, when you're trying to be fucking side-by-side your black brothers and sisters to show your solidarity, you shouldn't be fucking looting.
You're making it fucking worse. You shouldn't be breaking fucking windows and stealing shit.
But if you are looting, loot from Target. If you're looting, you better not be white.
No, just stop. You better not be white.
If you're going to be white and loot, but don't loot a small business. Yeah, that's the other problem.
Why are you looting small businesses? Because now some of these stores on Melrose, they probably – Decimated. Not only decimated.
You have to understand that we've been in quarantine for two months, right? Yeah, they lost all that money. And now that was – yesterday was the day that we were supposed to open retail stores, right? And some of the mom and pop stores are like okay we barely made it yeah we're finally we get to open now we're able to stock our shelves that's all the money and then all of a sudden it's gone and now they're done i know you know it makes me target they made so much money off of the quarantine yeah like wal Target.
Amazon. Amazon.
They killed it. I don't believe in looting, but if you're going to loot those places, I don't feel as bad.
Well, no shit. Yeah.
They're corporations. They're corporations.
They'll get back on their feet. Don't loot mom and pop.
But I stand by what I said. Yeah.
Little white kids. Stand by me.
You are from France. You're from France? Yeah.
I stand by what I said. If you're a white kid and I see you looting, shame on you.
Fuck you. You're an idiot.
You're a fucking idiot. You got no business doing that.
Dude, it makes me so fucking mad. You know, we said earlier in the podcast, I said, I don't agree with setting things on fire and causing havoc and chaos.
I think if you do peacefully, it gets more done. But I understand the anger of people that want to take out their aggression and there's no right answer.
It sucks. You shouldn't do it.
I get the aggression. Things are coming to a head.
It sucks. But if I see a white kid stealing stuff and they're not even fucking part of the protest, they just want to steal shit and take advantage of what's happening, you're a piece of shit.
You're a fucking piece of shit. And I hope the cop tackles you and I hope they fuck you up.
Yes, yes. No, no, no, stop.
Yeah, I hope they do. No, stop, stop.
I hope they tackle every white kid and they throw his fucking ass in jail because that's not what this is about. Okay, stop.
All right. We'll be right back with KCAL 9 News.
Stop. I get passionate.

I get passionate.

Let's – this is a moment in history. Yeah.
Okay. Yep.
And we have to learn from this moment in history. And the lesson to be learned is if you're a cop and you murder an innocent human being, these are the consequences of those actions.
This is what happens. This is what happens.
Chaos. Chaos, right? Because like the analogy I said about filling out water, a balloon with water, it'll pop, right? We're in a popping time in in this moment yeah right so there are negative consequences that i don't even agree with like looting and people getting hurt and yeah tear gas the whole fucking thing it's awful it's all terrible but let's look at why why did it happen yeah and so let's learn from this.
Yeah. But we won't.

Because I'll tell you why. We might.
No. I do think this could create a big change.
Dude, this is happening all over the world. Last night, one of my favorite documentaries of all time is – The Epstein documentary? I watched it.
I loved it. No, I Am Not Your Negro.
Oh, yeah. Have you seen it? Yeah.
It's about James Baldwin. He was an author, right? And he was supposed to write a book or a play about his three friends that were murdered.
It was a play? Yeah. Metzger, Martin Luther King, and Malcolm X.
That's right. He was friends with all three of them.
And there was a clip in there where they showed a protest in Birmingham, I think. Yeah.
And a cop had his knee on a black woman's neck.

Right.

And it showed it.

It was a still.

It was a still.

It wasn't video.

It was a photo.

Yeah.

Right.

And I thought, oh, they've been doing this shit forever.

Forever.

Yeah. Right.
And this is in what what, the late 60s when this happened? It hasn't changed. No, I know.
Right? Now we just have social media to show you what's going on. Right.
So my point, though, is that I'm not a black guy living in America. I wouldn't even know.
I'm an Asian guy. I have my own experiences with this, with racism.
But it's not remotely even close to what African Americans have witnessed and lived through in this country. So I have to be, as an Asian guy, mindful and try to get as much information about the history and learn from it myself.
And I'm at guilt too because I haven't done anything to help. I'm a bystander.
I watch it. I watch it.
I hate it. You know what I mean? When Trayvon Martin, all these kids get killed, right? I'm the first to follow it on social media and on the news.

I read all the articles.

It kills me.

It destroys me.

It breaks my fucking heart.

But I have to admit, I haven't done anything.

What do you think you should be doing?

I don't know.

Okay, so that's...

I don't know, but I need to do something.

Small steps help, right?

Yeah.

Like I said before, posting about it on social media, that stuff helps.

It helps to get your voice out there because people who respect you and love you that go, man, I love Bobby. I'm doing it now.
I know. I'm saying it now.
So what I'm saying is you are helping. Yeah.
I'm saying that it's got to stop. And if riots and these things need to happen, they need to happen.
They're going to happen. They're going to happen.
It's just going to happen happen and so what needs to get fixed is the fucking system yeah and it's got to be a complete mind shift a shift in in in in america's mentality and perspective and ideology we really have to do a shift in this country in the biggest way yeah right? And the first thing that we need to do is get that guy out of office.

He – I'm sorry.

Regardless of what your political point of view is, right, he enjoys this.

He ignites it with his words.

He knows – he wants a civil war, right?

Because the guy – the people that support him are on the other end of this thing, right?

So the more he ignites it, the closer they become to her and more loyal to him, right?

And this is – we need somebody in the middle who's going to reach out to everybody yeah but that's hard to find almost impossible to find why can't we have you will you run yeah because if i was president because you're because you're i would change things for for my own personal that's what they all do? No, I would tear down the White House. Okay, cool.
And rebuild it made out of Vicodin. Oh.
So when it gets stressful, I lick the walls. No, yeah.
I'll lick a wall, right? President Lee, you've been eating part of the West Wing this entire morning. Right.
We have to rebuild it. And because I'm Asian, there would be no West Wing.
Only East Wing. Ah.

Right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's very good.

Yeah.

And then there would be a lot of like designer toys.

What would your menu be if you were in the Wise House?

What's your...

Oh, my God.

And everyone would have to eat it.

They do.

They all have to.

Yeah.

I would have Lou.

Oh, Lou.

Kang?

Lou Kang?

No.

Lou Malanati.

Oh, Lou Malanati.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, you'd have my stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I'm coming over.
So Lou Malanati's on Mondays. Yeah, Lou Malanati.
Oh, Lou Malanati. Yeah, yeah.
Oh, you'd have my stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, I'm calling over.

So Lou Malanati's on Monday.

Yeah, Lou Malanati on Monday, right?

What's on Tuesday?

Terry.

Well, who's Terry?

Terry, there's a Mexican restaurant.

You mean that right down the street from me?

Okay, so you want that chef to come work in the White House?

Well, it's not a chef.

It's a woman that owns the restaurant.

Okay, so the woman, you need to...

Well, tell Terry, hey, Terry, all your cousins and stuff.

Come live at the White House.

Yeah, yeah, you live at the White House.

In the basement.

On Tuesday.

Well, you don't want them to live in the main house, do you?

No, no, no.

I don't want them to live in the main house, do you? No, no, no. You know what I'll have for them? Yeah.
For the Mexicans? A South Wing. A South Wing, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have a South Wing.
But there's a wall. There's a wall.
Oh, definitely a wall. Oh, yeah.
I'll never, yeah. I'll never see that.
So your menu is Luma and Lali's Monday, Taco Tuesdays. Yeah, Tuesdays.
And then Wednesdays I would have, well, this is a little bit of hoity-toity, but I go to a place called Asanabo. Oh, Asanabo.
You know what it is? Yes. What is it? Sushi.
Yeah, where? Do you want to talk about it? Yeah. So Asanabo is a Michelin star sushi restaurant.
It's super expensive. It's only one star, by the way.
It got a star.

Yeah, well, you get a star, you get a star.

Did McDonald's get a star?

It did.

What do you eat?

It got a half star.

And I don't eat McDonald's.

I think people have looked at my body and your body.

They'd go, you eat McDonald's.

I'm fucking...

When you get 48...

You're wearing their colors.

When you turn 40...

You look like McDonald's.

Fuck you.

You look like a fry.

When you turn 40 and see what you look like.

You look like a box of fries.

You look like Greg Fitzsimmons when you're 48. You look like the same color of the box and your little yellow arm sticking out.
You look like a fry. You look like a fry.
Well, you turn 48 and see what you look like. You look like a box of fries.
You look like Greg Fitzsimmons when you're 48. Because you have the same color of the box and your little yellow arms sticking out.
You look like French fries. Fuck you.
So then on Wednesdays, Asanaebo. Asanaebo.
Yeah, yeah. And then Thursdays, I would have to go...
Something light. What do you mean? Something not...
You know, like something a nice... Like a salad place.
Like a salad. No.
I'm president, bitch. Okay.
Yeah. Yeah.
You'll be my vice president? I have your VP. Yeah, you will.
I don't have to do anything. They don't fucking do anything.
I know. I just have to make a couple speeches where I'm like, oh, I'm concerned about the environment.
And then I'd go eat El Senable. Yeah.
And then Thursday I would probably do, um, I'm, you know, a big fan of, um, pot pies. Really? Oh, yeah.
Do you like empanadas?

Have you ever had Nona's empanadas?

I love empanadas.

You ever had Nona's empanadas?

But it's not my favorite.

Oh, my God.

Have you ever had Nona's?

Yeah, I've heard of it.

She makes the best empanadas.

Oh, yeah?

Have you ever had empanadas?

Yeah. Do you like them?

Yeah.

Have you ever had Nona's?

Do you know Nona's?

Oh, my.

They're all over.

There's one in Beverly Hills.

I just like white Americana. Oh.
Chicken pot pies. What about? Do you know Nona's? Oh my They're all over There's one in Beverly Hills I just like white Americana Oh Chicken pot pies What about So you want chicken pot pie I like chicken pot pies I like any kind of pot pie Roast Piping hot Piping hot Straight out of the oven Flaky crust So when you eat it you go Yeah And it burns you Oh yeah and I would also do I would also do Some sort of like Ramen-y place on a Friday or something.

You've had a Pudo, right?

Udon, Robin.

You've had a Pudo?

A Pudo ramen?

Yeah, I've had a Pudo ramen, bro.

They brought one here

to LA.

Yeah.

And I went over there.

Yeah.

Wasn't good.

I was so disappointed.

I said,

I've had a Pudo in Japan.

Did you really?

Yeah.

And then I said,

I had it in New York too

and it was better there.

And the woman was like,

oh, you didn't like it?

I said, no, this is not good.

Anyway, shut the fuck up, Vice President. I don't care what you want.
Sorry, sir. Sorry, sir.
No empanadas. I'm sorry, sir.
All right? Yep. And no fucking...
Can we have some Chinese food, please? Oh, shit, yeah. We've got to have Chinese food.
You know where I would go? I would go... Oh, what the fuck it's called? It's called...
We eat it in Alhambra. It's called something coast fishing.
Do you know what it is? No. You've been there though, right? With a big lobster dish? Yeah.
Oh, my God. Coast something? It's in Alhambra.
Well, I'll get it later. Okay.
But I'm going to go there. And then Sundays are free for all.
That's just whatever you need to eat. You got to eat.
Yeah, yeah. Have you ever – when you go down to San Diego, when you go down to the Hoy store, have you ever had El Pescador, the fish market?

Do you like fish? Yeah. What?

I'm Asian. Fuck you.
Yeah, but I don't know if you like

cooked fish. I love all kinds of fish, bro.

Okay, relax. Have you been to Mama's Fish House?

No. In Maui? No.
Oh my

God. I know.
I've heard. You've talked about it before.

It literally is.

Well, it's a two-month reservation.

Yeah, and you talked about getting, you got in. Because you're special.
That's special. Well, no, most people there didn't know you, but one guy was a fan.
Are you out of your mind? Yeah. Yeah.
You get it. So anyway, let's go back to I Am Not Your Negro, the documentary.
Yeah. Honestly, if you're somebody that's like, oh, why can't they just get over it and all that stuff?

You have to open your eyes and your heart and start fucking watching shit and learning about shit.

I really think that that's vital viewing.

Yeah, you need to watch stuff like that.

That specifically.

Yeah.

I love that guy, James Baldwin.

Meanwhile, I did watch the Epstein documentary last night. I't know who that is Jeffrey Epstein no is he a lawyer Jeffrey Epstein he's a lawyer you don't know who that is you have no frame of reference to what happened socially what do you know who Jeffrey Epstein is I know what he did what did he do who is he though he though? just tell me and then I'll stop what did he do? is he the one with Trump with human trafficking? that's right little girls little girls dude he's a pervert you don't know about Jeffrey fucking Epstein it was a big thing you couldn't escape it I'm sorry should we cut this out? they said they killed himself cut this part out please cut this part out no we're leaving it yeah but I don't know how do you not know who fucking Epstein is? I don't know cut this part out they said they killed himself cut this part out no we're leaving it how do you not know who fucking Epstein is they said he killed himself but he didn't he probably was fucking murdered at the hands of what I think that Clinton Clinton said he killed him dude he used to be friends with Bill Clinton they had a private island with little kids you don't know any of this stuff this is blowing my mind he used to pay high school girls $200 to come over his house.
You know who Mixik Choi is? Mixik Choi? Yeah. Yes.
Who is he? He's a DJ. Mixik Choi.
He's not a DJ. Mixik Choi.
How does that feel though? Mixik Choi? Yeah, you don't know who Mixik Choi is. Who's Mixik Choi? Do you know who it is? No.
Get the fuck out of here, Bobby. Mixik Choi was in the old boy.
He was the actor. Oh, it's him? Yeah.
Dude, Jeffrey Epstein is, it's like the most famous case of the past decade. Do you know who Kaiser Soze is? Yes, and who Kaiser fucking Soze is.
Mixik Choi. Do you know? Do you know who Tushira Maffoon is? Tushira Buffoon? Tushira Maffoon.
Tushira Big Spoon? No. See buffoon.
To share a big spoon?

No.

See, you don't know.

See, two can play this game, my friend.

No, no, no.

Everybody knows who Jeffrey Epstein is.

No, they don't.

Yes, they do.

Yes, they do.

It was the biggest case of the past decade to talk about.

I know who he is.

Pretending, pretending, pretending, pretending.

Fucking idiot.

Where did he... He was in the New York prison, then he killed himself and he was – Did not.
I know he didn't. He was murdered.
He was murdered. But they say that he killed himself and there's many photos of – Clintons.
Bill Clinton. There's also many photos with him with Trump as well back in the day.
Trump, him with – dude, but people – but not just Democrats. I mean not just Republicans.
Yeah. Lots of Democrats.
The human trafficking thing. Gross.
Disgusting. I don't like it.
I hate it. I got to tell you something.
I'm going to go out on a limb. I don't like it.
Human trafficking, I'm not a fan. Can I ask you something about human trafficking real quick? Uh-oh.
No, because let's suppose I had the whim. Like, let's suppose, just, let's see you and I woke up one day and I called you.
Yeah. I go, let's just try to start one up.
Just to hear me out. I would go, ha, ha, ha.
What are you, come on. No, but I don't know how.
How would you, where do you even start? Is there a kid? I'll give you the guy's number. No, you gotta be, I mean, you capture people? I mean, what do you do? The point of this documentary is you become rich and powerful, and the very rich and powerful have access to everything.
Leslie Wexler. Do you know who Leslie Wexler is? You ever heard of this name? He was very good friends with Epstein, one of the richest men at one point in America, owned a company called The Limited.
Remember the clothing brand for girls? Also bought a little company called Victoria's Secret. Which, by the way, if anybody wants to know the story of Victoria's Secret, I don't know if you've ever heard of this, he bought the company from the guy who started it for a million dollars.
Here's how disgusting and tragic it is. This guy who started Victoria's Secret, him and another partner, they had dumped their entire life savings into this boudoir-era lingerie company.
It was taking off. It was netting $6 million a year.
Okay? $6 million. It's very vague, and it's been theorized that Leslie Wexler basically strong-armed this guy into selling him the company for $1 million.
Because why the fuck, if you're making six million, would you sell a company outright for a million dollars, right? He takes his company, grows it into a multi-multi-billion dollar Victoria's Secret's fucking huge, right? Not too long after, this guy jumps off the Golden Gate Bridge. Kills himself.
So Leslie Wexner is one of these fucking super powerful, I'll-get-anything-I-want guys, and he was paired up and buddy-buddy-buddy with Jeffrey Epstein. In the documentary, they try to make him out to be like,

I didn't know, and I didn't know what he was up to and all this stuff.

Bullshit.

They would use his mansion in Ohio.

Why did the guy who used to own Victoria's Secret?

Because he went fucking broke.

He sold for a million dollars.

He thought he was going to use that money to start a new company.

Then he saw how much money Victoria's Secret made, and he got fucked.

He got fucked.

I know, but you know what?

When you tie yourself to money, that's not what life is about correct correct but when you get fucked over it probably hurts even worse it doesn't matter it's like alright well I'm gonna take all your money from you I'm gonna take that's fine but I would never kill myself you okay I take all your money your family and your friends that you think are your family and your friends they leave. They want nothing to do with you.
You're all alone and you're broke and you had everything, but you got everything taken away. I would go to Washington, hitchhike if I have no money.
State of Washington. Right, and I would go to a woodcarver.
Okay. I'm the woodcarver.
Go ahead. And I go, hey, man.
Hey, what's up? Listen, I just need a place to stay and food okay i want to also learn from you okay work wood carvings oh you got a little uh let me see your hands put your hands up yep i'm sorry man can't work with those little korean hands why i can pick up i have no too tiny you got to be a man man you got a big old man mitts over here yeah but i can carve it i want to carve little ornaments like little animals and stuff. Oh, a little tiny work.
Yeah, yeah. We can have you do that.
Thank you. Why don't you go live in the shed? Yeah.
I'll give you $5 a day. Yeah, and I would pray.
No praying. Oh, no, I would pray.
I would pray, right? Yeah. And get into Eastern meditation.
I would figure it out, I think. You'd find your own way.
Yeah. Yeah, but when some people have been fucked over whole, when something like fucks them over and their life goes upside down, it's kind of hard.
I know, I can understand that, but still it's like... Like, because there's so much vindictive power in money.
Do you know the story of the guy who made Beanie Babies? Do you know about this guy? Have you ever heard him about Ty? I don't know his last name. What's a Beanie Baby? You know what a Beanie Baby is, right? Don't you? The one with the neck? What's going on? Yeah.
You guys don't know Epstein or Beanie Babies? I feel like I'm going to fucking... The neck? A Beanie Baby.
A little tiny plush toy. I know what a Beanie Baby is.
Go on. The story of this guy is fascinating.
He basically wanted to fuck over his dad, told his dad to go fuck himself. Yeah.
Because he got fired from the toy company he used to work at. Went traveling around Europe or something, went to Italy or some shit, saw that they were making all this money on Plus Choice, came back here, started this company, if nothing more than to bury his father, basically, just to get back at his daddy.
And he spent his entire, like, youth, because he hated his father, trying to fuck his dad's girlfriends. He lost his virginity to one of his dad's girlfriends.
Wow. His entire goal in life was to gain power and money from his father and fuck him over because he had daddy issues.

Indeed he did.

Yeah.

But that's what most of these psycho rich people are.

I know.

They're psychos.

The money thing is like money is not even the real thing.

They just want the power and the ability.

It's gross.

I think right now because I did yoga right before this.

Yeah, you seem calm.

I'm very calm and I think I'm looking at it in more of a namaste kind of a lens.

So –

Give up all your possessions then.

How about this?

If you're going to be namaste, can I keep all the money that you would make from the podcast?

Yeah, you can but I won't do it then.

Huh.

If you want to do it on your own, Bad Friends, or if you want to do it with theo vaughn or um big head what's his name the one with the the one that goes who is that shube bandy shube you're the only person i want to do anything with you know want to do it with... You're my prince.
Let me just do impressions of it, all right? Mm-hmm. Dahlia.
Yeah. Okay.
You want to do it with it, right? Yeah. If you want to do it with...
Callan. No.
Whitney. No, Theo Vaughn.
Oh, Theo. Oh, you were holding your hair.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was holding the mullet.
I don't want to do it with anybody but you, baby. You're the only one that I've ever cared about.
You're the only one that I've ever loved. You're the only person that's ever had my heart.
And you know that. How do you think this is going to end? You think these riots are going to fizzle away? Or do you think something needs to happen? Like Derek Chauvin getting first-degree murder.
Well, Trump needs the television and try something and at least say something no he went to NASA and did that speech in the NASA no he needs to fucking get on TV yeah he needs to get on TV and say and say something seriously you you can't say anything and heal the country if you have no empathy uh yeah that's probably true he needs to but he needs he he can't he the capability of healing. He needs to say something.
But regardless, he needs to say something. Right now is the time.
The time is now to make a statement, and it needs to be meaningful. He just doesn't have it, my friend.
I'm so sorry. I understand why people support him, and I'm not angry at people.
I used to be. I used to be.
I used to be. You used to be mad at to be mad that people that voted for yeah i was like a little confused and like and kind of angry i know comics i'm not going to call them out go ahead i know comics that support him that they don't say anything but i know they do we can say it no i can't d'alea chris d'alea.
So but – and I used to be kind of like, well, why would you vote for that guy or whatever?

But I think I'm getting to the point where it's like I haven't walked in their shoes. Namaste.
And I don't know why they come – why they like them. Namaste.
Really. And I don't know if it derives from some sort of trauma.

Mama, namaste. Trauma namaste.
Yeah, yeah. I don't know what it is, but it's not my job to understand.
It's just I have to accept it. You have to accept it.
Yeah, namaste. Namaste.
Yeah. Namaste.
I want to kill them sometimes. People get so mad when we get political on the show, but I will say this.
No matter what you believe in, if you support Trump or if you don't like him, as a community, as people, we need to do our part on the lowest level to look out for each other.

And I'm being very genuine when I say that.

I don't fucking care what side you're on.

We need to be better people to each other.

That's a fact.

That's true.

I mean that.

I mean it, mean it.

Yeah, I mean it.

I think we need to be better people to each other. That's a fact.
That's true.

I mean that. I mean it, mean it.

Yeah, I mean it. I think we need to...
Supporting black people during

this time is a very important thing for whites

to do if you have enough

fucking gumption and balls to

make a statement about it.

But we do

need to care about each other. I think that's the

hardest thing right now.

Namaste.

Namaste.