Knick-Knack Paddy Whack (Karen Gillan, Lily Sullivan, Chris Kleckner)

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mine, come and see my

mother.

Sheremi with Jeremy.

We're off to cup.

Not couples therapy, thrupples therapy.

Oh man, I messed it up right in the middle.

Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang.

Hey, thank you to Henry Artemis, Hentai Archivist, for that incredible catchphrase submission.

But unfortunately, I messed it up in the middle, and therefore it is cursed.

I will not be saying that every week.

The search continues for a good catchphrase.

Unfortunately, that will not be it.

But thank you so much to Henry Artemis.

And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week.

We have an exceptional show today.

Coming up soon,

we have a suspect.

Interesting.

We have a suspect.

We also have the king of the flea market.

We'll be here a little bit later.

So

pretty interesting show here.

But

first off,

Can I say it?

Stars are back.

Stars are back on Comedy Bang Bang, and we couldn't be happier uh i've taken you through the hierarchy of a good podcast guest of course uh movie star is right there at the top uh then it goes tv star then it goes uh

like stand-up comedian with a special out yeah

then i'll take an author

And then a podcaster, the scum of the earth.

But we have a genuine movie star here today.

You are a movie star.

You look surprised I said that.

Yeah, yeah, I just guess I don't.

You're here promoting a movie.

I am.

I am starring in a movie, but I feel like there's a difference between starring in movies and being a movie star.

You act in a lot of movies.

You star in them.

Your name is sometimes above the title.

You are occasionally number one on the call sheets, and you're the star of them.

Yeah, but if I wasn't the daughter of my parents, they wouldn't know who I am.

And that's my marker.

Does my parents know their name?

And they don't know most of the movie stars' names, to be fair.

That's true.

That's true.

But, of course, we all know her in the movies as Nebula from the Marvel franchises, the Guardians of the Galaxies, the Avengers.

Are you an Avenger?

Do they consider you an Avenger?

Yeah, I got to wear the outfit in one of the films.

Which outfit?

Do they all wear an outfit?

Yeah, there's a uniform.

There's an Avengers?

I don't think so.

Walk wears like purple pants.

No, no, there's one scene in Endgame where they're all wearing the same outfit.

They're all wearing the same thing and you get it.

That is an Avengers thing.

It's actually funny because we filmed it without wearing them.

We were all wearing our normal costumes.

And then later they decided they wanted us to be wearing a uniform.

So all of it was CGI.

Other than your heads, or did they even do your heads CGI?

No, our heads were the real heads.

Okay.

I was covered in prosthetics.

This begs the question, why don't they just let you show up in your street clothes?

Like wearing, you know, like jeans and cutoff jeans and scrapers.

Great question.

And then just replace your entire body.

I would love to know the answer to that because, yeah.

I also want to ask you, and I'll introduce you in a second.

I want to ask you,

you played Nebula and you famously shaved your head for the, for, what was it, the first Guardians of the Galaxy?

The first Guardians, yeah.

And then you're in, then you're in multiple more movies.

Do you have to shave your head every single time?

Or?

No, so I thought I was only going to be in one Guardians of the Galaxy.

So I was like, I can do that.

I can do it.

I do my head one time in my life.

But then I, you know, I'm tall.

I'm, I'm big.

So from behind, people kept calling me sir, which is fine, but just a bit like when you're bald and getting called a mountain, I don't know.

So then for the second film, I negotiated half of my hair.

So we like shaved just the under half.

It's called the under shave, which is a horrible word.

And then the next film, I had all of my hair.

So why not do that from the beginning?

Why not go, guys, why did I shave my head this first time?

James Gunn?

I don't know.

I would love to ask James Gunn.

Would you mind putting in a word for me so he can be on the show?

You know her also in the movies as Ruby Roundhouse from the Jumanji films.

And I didn't have to look up that name looking down at your Wikipedia page.

The length of time you took to say that as you were figuring out all the words.

As dot, dot, dot, dot, scanning this page.

Where the fuck is that name?

Of course, she is Amy Pond in the Doctor Who franchise.

That was back when you were a TV star, of course.

Yes.

So lower tier for your podcast.

But now you're a movie star.

And you are starring in the upcoming film.

It's out now in limited release, but it'll be out this Friday in wide release.

The Life of Chuck.

Please welcome for joining the exclusive One Timers Club on Comedy Bang Bang.

Although you've been on the TV show, we can talk about that.

Karen Gillen, welcome to the show.

Thank you.

Thank you for having me back.

No, not back.

First time on the podcast, second time.

Yes, that was an alternate universe version of the show.

Okay.

And that host is a different guy.

Okay.

And this is me.

This is the real show.

Wow.

Yeah.

Okay.

I'm so excited to beat the real you.

Thank you.

I've never met the real you either.

Welcome to the show.

It's so wonderful to have you.

We, of course, had a ball on episode 59.

Of course, episode 419.

But if you say season four, episode 19 of the television show, Reggie Watts' second-to-last appearance on the show as band leader.

I had to look up who else was on that episode because I couldn't remember it at all.

And

I remember your section.

It's not memorable.

No, I remember your section very well.

And then I was like, who, what else was in that show?

And I looked at it.

Who else was on it?

So I think it was John Gemberling

was the other couch guest.

And then

you have

Bob Einstein was

rest in peace.

Super Dave Dave Osborne was

also in it, but not on the day you were there.

Oh, I see.

Okay.

And that was an incredible experience because he accepted the role and then got to set and let us know he didn't want to say any of the lines that

we wrote for him and instead wanted to riff.

Excellent.

So that's an interesting episode, but you were fantastic on that and you were so game.

And it's so nice of you to be here.

You're out promoting this big, big movie, The Life of Chuck, which I have seen.

Oh, cool.

I went to a screening.

I had an interesting experience at the screening where I walked in and

there

were two people having a very loud conversation in Italian before the movie started.

Wow.

And I was like, oh, interesting.

A couple of people who obviously know Italian are here.

Interesting.

And then a couple more people came in, saw the people who were speaking Italian, went, ah, ciao, ciao.

And I went, oh, their friends are here.

No, they sat in a totally different section and then had loud conversations in Italian.

And more people came in, said hello to the other people in Italian, oh, bongiono, ciao, ciao, ciao.

Sat in a totally different place, had loud.

I'm like, is this an Italian screening?

Am I in the right movie?

Turned out it was the right movie.

It was in English, yes.

So why was there so many Italian?

I'm baffled by it, and I was hoping that you could run this up the flagpole and get some answers for me.

I will ask Mike Flanagan directly.

Thank you.

This is the director and writer of the film.

Yeah.

Now, you've been in the, I call it the Flaniverse.

Yeah, the Flaniverse.

For now over a decade, is that right?

I suppose so, yeah.

No, well over a decade.

Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah, he put me in one of his first films, Oculus, a horror film.

2013.

2013.

And he brought me over to America.

That's why I'm here.

He like plucked me out of Scotland.

Yeah, he kidnapped me and put me in a horror film.

And I just haven't left.

It's pretty wild.

You've been doing, because he did he's if if you don't know mike flanagan's work he mainly has worked in the horror genre he does all of the netflix

uh haunting of hill house haunting of hill houses the what was the the fall of the house of us fall of the house of usher which i saw which was great um yeah he's he's incredible And so you've worked with him so many times.

You're part of like his, he has sort of a repertory company, it feels like.

Yeah, it does seem like rep theater or something.

Yeah, and I got to be in one of the first ones, which was really cool.

And I can't believe I got that role because I just remember being in my childhood bedroom in Scotland and then getting that audition.

And then I had no one to read the other lines with me.

So my dad had to read the lines in his thick accent that no one can understand.

And he took so long, like, he talks normally.

And then when he started acting, he would just take these long pauses in between words and do like a voice.

I was like, Could you just talk like, say it like

he was auditioning as well?

I don't know what was going on, but I'll do an impression of it.

It was like this: it was like, Kaylee, tell us why you're really here.

And I was like, why are you talking like that?

But then I got the part.

And so he's thinking he did a good job.

And it's,

he's one of the worst actors.

Does Mike have anything for me in the next project?

I'm trying to do sort of an Alan Cummings thing.

I don't know.

I'm doing the best I can.

Yeah, that was pretty good.

Okay.

Speaking of which, would you go on Traders if they asked you to?

Oh, a hundred percent.

Yes, of course.

I always win at Mafia.

Do you really?

Yeah, because no one suspects me.

Well, isn't it random chance who ends up being mafia?

Yeah, no, I know, but if I am mafia, people don't think that I am.

Right.

Except once we get past the first round, and then everyone's on me.

But I always win the first round.

Well, you're a great actress, that's why.

You can lie with the best of them.

They don't think I'm capable of doing that.

Acting is lying, right?

You're just a liar.

Yeah.

Like, I lie to myself.

Meaning, like, I lie so hard to myself that I convince myself I'm genuinely feeling that.

Yes, that's right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I've seen you like with tears in your eyes in certain things.

How do you do that?

What's your process?

So I think about something that makes me feel the relevant emotion.

Oh,

I see.

This is a good tip.

I feel like

Ian McKellen in Extras.

There will be no scripts on the night.

Yeah, no, have you seen that or am I just talking to you?

I have.

Although, I think that was back around the Oculus era, wasn't it?

Probably back in the old days.

I haven't memorized it.

Or before that.

No.

But yeah, no, I just tricked myself into feeling something by calling upon something that's genuinely happened to me that will conjure up the relevant emotion that I need to.

So has everything happened to you that's happened in...

So like when you were Nebula, like all that stuff happened to you, you were in like a spaceship and all that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

Whoa, shit.

Yeah, I know.

That's crazy.

What did you do up in the spaceship?

I just flew flew around.

You flew around in spaceship.

Where'd you go?

I went to...

I can't think of one single planet.

Okay, well, it's in order.

You got, what's the first one?

Mercury.

Yeah, is it?

Venus.

Jupiter.

I don't know if that's the right order.

Well, you go Earth, Mars.

Okay.

God, that's when it gets a little...

Then I think it's Jupiter, then Saturn, Zen.

What about Venus?

Where's that?

That's number two.

I think I said.

Oh, did you say that already?

See, I kind of...

You're already forgetting planets I just said.

Can't retain a planet.

That's something about me.

Well, I mean, you took a joyride up in space and that helped you.

And when you were Ruby Roundhouse, I remembered it.

Well, that, yeah, you did.

Well done.

That was easy for me because that was genuinely something I've experienced not going into Jumanji.

But you were trapped in a video game.

I feel like I'm trapped in a video game always.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And also, I was playing a nerd from high school that has to pretend to be kickass all the time.

And so I was like, no acting necessary for this one.

Because how many seasons of Doctor Who did you do?

If I'm guessing four, is that right?

Two and a half.

I'm sorry, series.

Two and a half.

Yeah.

Seemed like four.

It was so fulfilling.

And you're a fan favorite.

And everyone seems to be going back to Doctor Who.

David Tennant came back.

Billy Piper's always coming back.

Like, are you like, what's going on?

Are you going to go back and do another couple years?

I don't have any plans to.

What?

But never say never.

You know.

We got to get you on Traders and back on Doctor Who.

I'm glad you're not my agent.

You're a movie star.

No, go back into

a reality TV show and go back to your first thing.

But people love you, of course.

That's where I first came to know your work in the Doctor Whoiverse.

Currently in,

you were with the 11th Doctor, I believe.

Yeah, Matt Smith.

Yeah, he's currently a, now he's, he's, he was in, he's a movie star as well.

He was in Morbius.

Yes,

it's a movie.

It's a movie.

It's a movie.

It counts as a movie.

It's also my fault.

Weirdly enough, that was the tagline to the movie, Morbius.

It counts as a movie.

I think that would have been useful for people to know going into it.

Yeah, that's my fault because he was like, what's it like doing Marvel?

And I was like, it's amazing.

Come and do it.

It was Sony Marvel.

It was Sony Marvel.

Sorry, Sony.

I love Sony.

I heard that about Morbius, though.

Like, a lot of people got tricked into it thinking it was real Marvel.

Yeah, you've got to know the difference between Sony Marvel and Marvel because there's a big difference.

A huge difference.

I think Sony Marvel doesn't even exist anymore.

Who knows?

But what about Spider-Man?

Is that Marvel Marvel now?

Spider-Man.

No, it's a Co-Pro, but

I'll take you all through this.

Yeah, I'll take you through it.

Of course, I have a Sony deal, and I'm writing Spider-Man for Marvel, so I shouldn't be saying any of this stuff.

But now you're in the life of Chuck.

Now, I saw this film, it's a very fascinating film.

I saw the trailer for it before another film

maybe a month or so ago, and I thought, oh, okay, it's based on a Stephen King book.

And I thought, oh, okay, this is one of his sort of slice of life, stand by me,

Shawshank Redemption, kind of like more grounded in reality kind of thing from the trailer

but then I watch the movie and it starts very

audaciously do you want to say what the how much can we say do you want to say what the premise of the movie is yes I do oh by the way your coffee is like my coffee just arrived

Karen asked before the show started can I order a coffee will that disturb the show and I very confidently said no of course not and it couldn't have come at a worse time while I was trying to formulate a question um But do you, someone's getting the coffee for you.

Do you want to describe the premise of the movie?

How much can we say?

I

have such a hard time describing this film.

So I'm going to try.

Okay.

It's a sort of life-affirming story about three chapters of an ordinary man's life.

But I don't know where to go from there.

Well,

let me just say where it kind of starts because

I hear what you said, and I think like oh it's that sounds kind of normal to me right but it's it's the opposite of normal it is it's very it's very audacious in its structure yeah and the the first part of the film is uh about a a group of people seemingly at the end of the of the world yes in a way it's the end of everything where like natural disasters are happening and it seem it seems like uh humanity is not going to exist very very soon Right.

And then it goes from there, which is very, very interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's just such a unique,

interesting film.

And it's like, it's basically like nothing I've ever seen before.

And when I read the script, I was like, this is, I just, this is brand new territory.

And that's why I'm having a hard time describing exactly what it is.

You kind of just need to go and see it.

It's cute.

It's my coffee.

It's definitely not something.

There it is.

Please enjoy it while I talk.

It definitely felt like something I hadn't seen before.

It definitely felt like, oh, holy shit, what is happening here?

It's sort of a mystery.

These characters in the beginning, a mystery comes up where they're wondering

who a certain person is that they keep seeing everywhere.

And then it just goes from there.

And

it starts as a very bold.

mystery and then it goes into a very heartwarming drama as well.

It's a fascinating film.

Yeah, it's beautiful, and it's all about celebrating moments of joy in life, and it does make you sort of walk away and ask yourself questions: like, how am I choosing to spend my time being alive

right now?

And this is how I'm choosing to do it.

Can't think of anything better to be doing.

And to be on Traders, yes.

Oh, I'll tell you what.

Also, they film it where I'm from.

I know.

So it's like, it would just be like going home and then going to the local castle.

You could probably walk home after every night.

Genuinely.

Yeah.

I think I looked at that place as a wedding venue, actually.

Really?

Yeah, went for a different one, but a different castle.

Interesting.

Oh, you so you got married in a castle?

I got married in a castle, and let me tell you, can you swear on this?

Uh, which words do you want to say?

Shit show,

yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, it was one of those.

It was a shit show, but it was amazing.

The wedding, the days leading to the wedding were shit shows.

Um,

the wedding itself, shit show

every day.

Marriage, Shit show.

No, no, no, it's not a shit show.

No, the wedding itself was great, but just everything went wrong in the lead up that could possibly go wrong in this wedding.

Like it was basically like this lovely couple were showing us around the castle a year prior.

They were like, we're going to do it up.

It's going to be lovely.

And it was a construction site.

And then four days before the wedding, it was still a construction site.

And my wedding planner went in and she just saw one man with a hammer called Keith.

And he was like, I'm sorry, Gina, you're absolutely right.

You're absolutely right.

I should have sorted this out.

And were just like, what's going to happen?

There was no hot water.

There was nowhere to cook.

People were meant to live in the castle for a four Fridays.

And that, you know, was, it was, there was like wires coming out of the walls.

And also this beautiful couple that had hosted us and we were like, we would just want to end up like you had gone through a bitter divorce.

Since you

read Ono.

Yeah, and so I think that they were, you know, just almost hoping the wedding would be sabotaged in some way for some reason.

I mean, I guess if it were me, I would would call up the local Marriott and just go, hey, do you have a ballroom available?

Can we do this?

So here's the thing.

It was in the middle of nowhere in Scotland.

There's no Marriotts.

There's nothing.

Couldn't you have called everyone and said, hey, we're going to this place that's not in the middle of nowhere instead?

Could have, yes, I suppose.

But it was all sorted.

Everyone had booked their travel.

Wow, that's that's so it but so it went off with hitches, but you know what?

It was genuinely the most incredible time.

Like it was, everyone said it was their favorite wedding that they've ever been to.

But it was like faulty towers.

Like, you know, door handles were coming off and things were going wrong.

But it added to it, you know?

I feel like that sometimes

the mistakes that happen on the day, we had several of our own with my wedding where it was supposed to be outside and then across the street

on Elvera Street, a loud music festival started playing an hour before the wedding, so we had to move everything inside.

The DJ didn't got the wrong day, didn't show up, all this kind of stuff.

And at a certain point, we just started laughing

at how ridiculous it was getting.

And then everyone had such a good time at the wedding and said, oh, it was so much better that it was inside

because my wife got to make this incredible entrance down a spiral staircase that way, all this kind of stuff.

So I think that the day itself can be stressful, but it can lead to something really.

Yeah, I think it just makes you go like abandon all these expectations that you had and just sort of roll with it, which is a nicer mentality to go into it with.

That's what Steve Winwood would do.

Roll with it.

Who's Steve Winwood?

Should I know who this is?

Nope.

I shouldn't even know who he is.

Well, The Life of Chuck is out there, and this is an incredible cast.

I wanted to highlight the cast because it's sort of top lined by

Tom Hiddle,

who, of course, I saw on Broadway in Betrayal,

which shares some of the same creative DNA of this film.

I won't spoil exactly what I'm talking about.

But anyway, I'll tell you during the break.

But you have Tom Hiddleston.

You have

Chuatel,

H4,

Mark Hamill,

Mia Sarah, of course, Sloan from Ferris Bieler's Day Off.

Matthew Lillard.

You have Carl Lumbley.

You have Kate Siegel.

Nick Offerman does the narration in it.

Such a great cast.

And if you had told me

that

Loki, Nebula, Shaggy from Scooby-Doo, Luke Skywalker, and Chewie were in the same movie, Chewa Tell,

I would be going crazy.

It's interesting that you chose Shaggy from Scooby-Doo out of all of Matthew Loki.

Oh, I'd be still hoggery.

He's great, by the way.

He's great in the film.

Boom, scream.

Yeah, he's great in Scream, but he's shaggy.

Okay.

That's iconic.

To me, it's she's all that, actually, if I'm choosing from his film.

He's segued from like this interesting teen actor into like an adult actor who like brings it in all these amazing things like Twin Peaks and this.

Yeah.

Oh, he's incredible in the life of Chuck.

Yeah.

I mean, he made me cry when I watched it for the first time.

Yeah.

Did you get to see anyone?

Because you're in, it's an ensemble cast and everyone does like a little slice of stuff.

Did you get to see any of the other people filming or did you just kind of like, how many days did you work, by the way?

What number were you on the call sheet?

Four.

What, really?

I don't know, actually.

I'm going to guess I was four looking at the names.

So that's your own view of yourself.

Interesting.

So I think I'm general four.

Okay.

I probably worked about two weeks, but less than that, maybe five or six days.

Yeah.

I mean, the sequences you're in are incredible, though.

Oh, I loved filming those.

It was wild to sort of ask yourself what it might genuinely feel like to be at the end of everything.

Yeah.

And so many different emotions came up that I was a bit more.

Did you audition or are you offer-only?

I did not audition for that one, but I'm not offer-only.

I actually would like everybody to know that I'm not offer-only.

Would you audition for the trailer?

Or at least least put together like a casting tape.

Yeah, I do like

a single reel of my personality.

Well, the life of Chuck, this,

it's, I really, we don't want to say too much about it because a lot of the interesting part of it is how it unfolds and where it unfolds and why it unfolds and who it unfolds and when it unfolds.

Is that right?

The reporters' questions.

But

it's getting a lot of notice.

People are

saying Oscar buzz.

If you had to put a number on it, how many Oscars do you think it'll be nominated for?

And then how many will it win?

Okay.

I think it's going to be nominated for

three Oscars.

Three.

Which three do you mind saying?

I think it's going to.

Let's just say this out loud and I might manifest it.

Best actor for Mark Hamill.

Best Picture.

Because it won Toronto Film Festival.

That's a precursor to winning.

That's a precursor.

And I just threw in a third one that I don't really know what it is.

Maybe score.

Oh, screenplay.

Oh, score.

Yeah.

Score and play.

Score or screenplay, maybe.

Yeah.

And

then also, they'll create a special award for you, probably like lifetime recognition.

Yes.

I think it's about time that I had one of those.

My contribution to the industry is deserving of.

Of course, you were Ruby.

Be Roundhouse.

Roundhouse.

Yes.

Jumanji.

Yes.

Jumanji.

Well, The Life of Chuck is out this Friday in wide release, and I implore everyone to go see it.

We're going to take a break, if that's okay, but you can stick around, I hope.

Sure.

You're in the One Timers Club.

I hope you will.

Oh, absolutely.

I'm going to have some coffee and be here.

That's fantastic.

Coming up, we have a suspect.

We also have the King of the Flea Markets.

So this is a good show you're on.

Wait, suspect for Walt?

I don't know.

We're going to have to drill down on this, I think, after the break.

But we'll be right back with more Karen Gill and more comedy bang bang.

We'll be right back after this.

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Comedy Bang Bang, we're back.

Karen Gillen here in the exclusive One Timers Club, of course, populated by such stars as Ben Stiller, Paul Rudd, Childish Gambino, and now Karen Gillen in the exclusive One Timers Club.

Oh, that's a cool club to be part of.

It is very cool.

The Two Timers Club, a little less cool.

And then you get to be like Adam Scott, who's been on for like 28 times or something like that.

And it's like...

Yeah.

He's TV, though.

Right.

You know,

he was in that Sony universe.

He was in that Madame Webb.

Madame Webb.

That is the French say.

Madame Webb.

Did you see Madame Webb?

I did.

My friend Tony Sony and I saw it together.

But

yeah, it's, I mean, he plays Uncle Ben

in that.

Is there a character called Uncle Ben?

How much do you know about Spider-Man?

What are the facts you know about Spider-Man?

He's got a ginger love interest.

And that's all I care to know.

I mean, not in the...

Someone fancies a ginger.

Not in the current film version, but yes.

Mary Jean Watson is traditionally, yes, ginger.

Yes.

Yes.

And that's all you know about it.

You don't know anything about his powers?

I know that he can shoot web from his fingers.

That's two things you know.

And he can.

Is it not his fingers?

What's it coming out of?

That would be a very different look, I think, if he looks.

Oh, is it one finger?

Or is it between his fingers?

Well,

okay.

Well, now we're getting into organic web shooters versus mechanical web shooters.

But

in the comic books,

he's made them

it comes out of his holes in his costumes on his wrist, but he's made a mechanism that shoots them.

So it's not coming out of him organically.

That's true, yes.

But then in the Sam Raimi films,

they thought that was weird that he would have the powers of the spider except shooting webbing, so they made them come out of his wrists.

So they are organic.

So in that case, they were organic.

Then in the comics, comics, they decided to ape the very popular film series, so they had them coming out of the wrists.

They changed it to coming out of the wrists, and everyone just thought that was weird.

Like, it's kind of creepy, like, webs coming out of someone's wrists.

Well, I want to know what is there always holes there, or do they open?

Like, there's questions.

In the Sam Raimi films, if you'll see it, much as I did

in 2001 or two when it came out, when she was ginger.

Yes, when she was ginger, yes.

With, of course, Ahmed Zappa spraying silly string everywhere anytime he shot webs, which annoyed a lot of people.

The holes, like, opened in his wrists, I believe, and then they sealed back up.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

That's less creepy, I suppose, than like constant holes.

Constant holes.

Why did we start talking about the web shooter?

Oh, yes.

Because I don't know.

Yeah, because I wanted to know how much you knew about Spider-Man.

Yeah, because we were talking about Madame Webb.

Madame Webb.

Oh, there's a character named Uncle Ben in Spider-Man lore who kind of dies and teaches him everything he needs to know about responsibility and all that stuff.

Oh, okay.

Right.

Have you ever read a comic book?

Have you?

Do you know anything about Nebula?

I've, yes, I've read The Infinity Gauntlet.

Oh, okay.

What did you think of that?

I thought it was really good, and that's the only comic I've ever read.

And I had never read one before that, but I read it and I was like, oh, I get why people read these.

And then you promptly put it down.

And that was the end of it.

And yet, they're for nerds.

My husband, my husband writes them sometimes.

Does he really?

What's he writing?

He wrote Rocket and Groot comics.

Oh, wow.

I got to check those out.

Yeah.

Fantastic.

Well,

Karen is here.

We're talking about the life of Chuck, which is out this Friday in wide release.

And we have to get to our next guest.

I mentioned she's a suspect.

I don't know what a suspect for what, though.

Yeah, this is the mystery.

Like, what she's suspected of.

Yeah, I don't know.

We're going to figure this out.

Please welcome to the show, Kitty St.

Beauregard.

Oh, hello, detective.

Didn't expect to see you so soon.

See, you brought your friend.

Didn't expect to be double-teamed so early this morning.

Come on in, the place is a mess.

When did you expect to be double-teamed?

Can I get you a drink?

The usual.

Smeared off ice

on the rocks with a twist.

Do you have chocolate smeared off ice?

We have only chocolate milk.

I'll get you a glass.

And for you, pretty little lady.

It's like we're in a noir.

She just got a coffee, I think.

Are you okay?

I mean, I'll take a little vodka in the coffee, like a little, make it Irish.

Sure.

All I've got is whiskey.

Yeah, that's the rum kind.

Oh, so rum, then?

That's right.

Do you want some rum?

Some parrot bay.

Here, let me pour you a glass.

I know why you're here.

This is a Jimmy Buffett Margarita Ville restaurant themed glass.

Why do you have these?

That's right, that's where I vacation.

I go straight to Jimmy Buffett's Margarita Ville in Las Vegas, and I hang out there the whole time.

Okay.

Are these the type of questions you're going to be asking me today?

I honestly, no,

I don't know anything about you, so I would probably just ask you.

You don't know anything about me?

Yeah, right.

Last time you were here, I remember.

I gave you a big old bowl of nuts.

You remember that, Scott?

I don't remember a bowl of nuts or you.

Here you go.

It's a bowl of pistachios and water with a spoon.

I know what you like.

This looks disgusting, actually.

Take a big old slurp like you usually do.

Do you want these, Karen?

Actually, yeah.

Oh, okay, here you go.

Thank you, Scott.

Take a big old slurp like you usually do.

Oh, I remember that sound.

It's been years since I've seen you, but I know why you're here, Scott.

I know why you're here.

Well, I'm hosting a talk show, and you're a guest on the talk show.

Is that what you mean?

Or?

You think I don't know why you're here?

Wasn't that funny, really?

Not even that funny.

Now you're rolling around on your back.

Kicking your legs up.

You're here because of my husband.

Who's your husband?

They're calling, you know what they're calling me around town, Scott?

I mean, I could guess if you wanted to.

The squatty putty killer.

The what?

The squatty potty?

The squatty putty killer.

Squatty potty.

Karen, do you know what a squatty potty is?

Is it something that you squat over to pee?

I think it's something that assists.

Why don't you explain it?

Squatty putty.

Put it at the base of your toilet.

Helps you get everything out.

Number two style.

How does it work?

How does it work?

It's like a little steel.

Your legs are supposed to be nice and high.

Up by your breasts when you take a shit.

Oh, I didn't know that.

That's what you do nature style, right, Scott?

So it's a little sort of step stool almost that you put your feet up on.

Because it emulates what you would be doing if you were like in the wild, in the woods.

That's right.

Correct.

Wait, do I need to get one of them?

You need to get one of them.

You can buy them on Amazon.

Are you an Amazon spokesperson?

No, me and Jeff go way back, but no.

So you killed someone who...

Oh, hey!

I'm sorry.

Don't accuse me of anything.

Oh, Scott, you've got my wrist.

Ow!

You're squeezing my wrist so hard.

I

all I did was tap you on the wrist because you turned away from me.

I wouldn't want you to come back and talk.

Ow.

Talk more into the mud.

I'm injured.

Oh,

I don't know that he'll ever come back from something like that.

Listen, I didn't do it, okay?

I didn't kill him.

So your husband is dead.

My husband's dead, that's right.

You remember him?

They called him Jealous Jack, but his name was Frank.

Who called him Jealous Jack?

The whole town.

Okay.

but why are you called the squatty potty killer because he died on a squatty potty slumped over his legs were too high they went in his armpits

so it was a high squatty potty or

his knees were as it were in his armpits his armpits were up by his head he strangled himself to death okay but why so what why do they think you did it Oh, Scott,

you silly man.

Because I've been accused of murder in the past, as you remember.

I I honestly feel like this is the first time you and I are meeting.

First time?

Yeah, right.

Remember?

I made you a powerade stew?

What is a power aid stew exactly?

I boil down the powerade into a liquid and I add a bunch of beef.

I believe power aid comes in liquid form, but

I boil it down to a syrup, Scott.

Oh, okay.

Cover it all over the meat, serve it over a bowl of rice.

Oh, I see.

Like a piece of glaze?

That's right.

Okay.

Slurped it up.

So you...

You were accused of murder previously as well.

Oh, that's right.

How did he die?

Or she?

It was my...

My ex-husband, Scott.

Oh.

My previous husband.

He was a chiropractor.

We all thought he'd die from cracking himself to death, but he didn't.

Cracking himself to death.

And everyone thought this.

Everyone thought he was going to crack himself to death, but he didn't.

Do chiropractors typically work on themselves or?

Oh, yeah, Scott.

They like to crack themselves to sleep crack themselves awake crack themselves into a little pretzel that's what they do scott you ever been to a chiropractor i went once yeah i i don't know about chiropractors i i've i've heard it's a uh not a precise science right yeah and i'm like is cracking good for you

you're cracking your bones yeah

i went once and it it it actually helped the thing i helped what well i had a back issue that was not going away and i went to one chiropractor and they went crack And did it go away forever?

It went away forever.

And your dick got hard after that, Scott?

Hey.

So what?

That's why you were there, wasn't it?

You could have been aware of that.

Oh, yeah.

I mean, since then, yes.

Good.

That was probably eight years ago.

It's nice to hear.

It's gotten hard twice since then.

That's good to hear, Scott.

Listen, I don't have any answers for you, okay?

I told you.

I was asleep when it all went down.

Where were you sleeping and where did your husband be?

I was asleep in my bed, Scott, my big old bed.

And sure, no one can verify that, but that's where I was.

I was underneath my covers on top of my foam mattress, temper-pedic.

Okay.

That's I mean, that's a slice of detail that kind of adds credence to your story, I guess.

Oh, sure.

But that doesn't answer anything for you, doesn't it?

You want me to be the killer, don't you?

I see it.

I have no skin in this game.

I honestly don't.

I see.

I'm recognizing a pattern here.

That's too much.

Where did you go?

Ex-husbands.

I think the MP3 I was sent ran out and I had to restart it.

Didn't know who I was for a minute there.

Now that was something scary, something I'll never forget.

Yeah, they're calling me.

I know what they're calling me around town, Scott.

They're calling me the ruggable killer.

Ruggable?

That's right, because he was found wrapped in a rug.

See?

He was found dead on his squatty body and wrapped in a rug.

So why ruggable, though?

Because that's what the rubber.

It was a ruggable rug.

You can put it in the washer.

You could wash it, Scott.

Oh, is that?

Haven't you heard of ruggable?

Is that a brand name?

I have no idea.

Oh, wow.

Not in your price range, I see.

Well, anytime we spill anything on a rug, we just throw it away and buy a new one.

That's the kind of price range we have.

You lucky dirty dog.

Some of us have to buy rugs we can wash so we can reuse them again.

It's not a paper towel situation.

So let me get this straight.

So just throw it in the trash.

All right, let me.

Kitty St.

Beauregard.

Let me get this straight.

First time you've said my name all day.

And I didn't have to look down, much like I didn't have to look down at Ruby Rounders.

Rounders!

Your husband was taking a shit.

That's right.

The squatty potty

got some sort of like elevated position.

That's right.

His knees strangled.

Him to death.

His knees pushed his shoulders up to his neck.

And then somehow he fell off into a rug, which then

ruggable rug.

Then he rolled himself into the rug as he fell.

That's right, Scott.

This makes sense to me.

Mystery solved.

I mean, I have my suspicions.

Do you really?

I think she did it.

Who's this troublemaker?

I'm sorry, it seems like you did it.

Seems like I did what?

What?

Two men.

Two men.

Who's the common denominator?

It's you.

Come on, she did it.

You got half a men, and you have a great sitcom on CBS.

Don't tease me, Scott.

You know I love two and a half men.

I watched the staircase, and he told you did it.

Come on.

Oh, no, not him.

He'd never.

Oh, see?

Of course you my boy, my beautiful boy, Colin Firth.

He'd never kill somebody.

Uh-uh, no way.

No way, no how.

No how.

Are you talking about the documentary version?

Or

look, I don't know.

You should be talking to the police about this.

The police?

You want me to go to the police and talk to them again?

You know what they did to me.

I had to scream fire.

Why?

They lit my

purse on fire, Scott.

So then you screamed fire.

That's right.

And then someone came in with some water or then they put the fire out on my purse.

That's right.

Okay, so it sounds like it worked out.

Worked out perfectly, Scott.

I can't go back there.

No, no, no, no way, no how.

Well, I, you know, it sounds like you have an airtight alibi.

You were sleeping in bed.

That's not what the police think, Scott.

I'm in big, big, big trouble.

That's right.

Big old trouble.

Well, how can we help?

I mean, Karen and I.

Yeah, you're on.

Look, when you're on Comedy Bang Bang, we have a new tagline.

I don't know if you know that, but at Comedy Bang Bang, we care.

What the fuck?

We hit on that recently.

Comedy Bang Bang, we care.

I like it.

Yeah, it's good, right?

It's short.

It says everything about the podcast, I think.

Comedy Bang bang bang.

Let me restart this.

Who am I?

There we go.

There I am.

But we care, and

you're a guest on my show, and when you're here, you're family, and I want to make sure that everything goes well for you.

Because I'm loving it.

Sure, yes.

Another slogan for another restaurant.

But that's fast casual, whereas I'm loving it is fast casual.

But we'll do anything for you.

Karen and I will lie to the police.

We'll do.

You'll lie to the police?

Yeah.

You'll lie to them boys in blue.

Sure.

You're not some kind of badge bunny, are you?

No, I don't know what a badge.

Oh, a badge.

Like

a police badge.

A badge bunny.

She's a girl who likes to be fucked by the police if you know what I'm talking about.

No, I'm not one of those badge bunnies.

If you know what I'm talking about, you said exactly what you're talking about.

Fucked by the police.

You know what I'm talking about.

Is that really what they're called?

That's right.

A badge bunny.

A badge bunny.

I don't think that's bad.

I used to be one many years ago.

Oh, is it not a thing?

Okay.

My boys in blue.

But then they came after me, Scott.

I had to get away.

I had to run away.

But they found me.

Just like you.

You found me.

So wait, you were getting, like,

double teamed by the police

from the regs?

That's right, Scott.

You ever heard about that porno that's based on that one woman who fucked the entire police force?

No.

That was me.

Oh,

in the porno, or it was based on

the heavy star as myself in the porno.

Wow.

That's right.

Well, I would love to help.

Yeah, we'd love to help.

You want to help?

Okay, fine.

Ow, Scott, you've got my leg.

I sorry, I just brushed against you.

You twisted my leg up in like a pretzel.

It's like my chiropractor husband used to do.

Wrap me up, crack me tight.

Fine, Scott.

What can we do?

What can we do?

I'll tell you the truth, okay?

I wasn't in bed.

I was somewhere else.

Where were you?

And I wasn't at the cabaret.

What

cabaret, like a nightclub?

You know, I'm a cabaret singer, Scott.

I honestly know nothing about you.

I haven't heard

scatting like that since Kim Cattrall.

That is incredible.

She's my idol.

Kim Cattrall.

Have you ever heard her scat?

Have you ever heard her scat?

I'll try to find the

play the clip.

You can stop the music, even though I'll lose my fucking mind while you do.

All right, let me stop this clip.

Who am I?

For real.

Kim Cattrall scatting.

That pops up right away.

Let's see, here we go.

I read

the upright bass.

That's her husband with her.

What?

Sapazu!

Is this from a film, or this is real life?

This is real life.

This is

a film.

From 60 Minutes or something?

I mean, obviously, obviously, great.

The halabaloo with

zapa do take a babapa pupe.

A scuba daba dittin doo.

There we go.

A zapa da ba.

A juma da ka.

I put a little bunny in a glass of milk.

Zappa.

Zapa.

So, in any case,

you were at the cabaret, or you were not at the cabaret.

God, I wasn't at the cabaret like you wanted me to be.

Okay.

I saw you asking questions to all the little other other ladies at the cabaret.

Where was she?

Was she here?

Was she there?

I mean, I went into a nightclub the other night because I got lost and I needed directions.

Is that and you just saw me there?

Is that

I was there for like three minutes.

My girls told me you were there, Scott.

They saw you.

Then they turned on my phone and said, here's your map app, and then showed me how to use it.

And I just, I got directions from that and I just left.

That's right.

I saw your location and everything.

I've been tracking you this whole time.

I knew you'd come.

I shared my location with you accidentally.

That's right, Scott.

That's why you're on the show?

Oh, yeah.

That's right.

That's why I'm here.

Can I get you a DVD, Scott?

I know what you like.

Let me get you a DVD.

Did you have DVDs around here?

I have a whole mess of them.

Oh, sure.

Why don't I put something on for you, Scott?

Do you have JoJo Dancer your life is calling?

No, but I've got JoJo Siwa, your favorite.

Let me go ahead and put on a clip of Jojo Siwa for you.

In what?

Like Dancing with the Stars?

Oh, no, Scott.

Her on Big Brother.

That's what you want to see, isn't it?

Big Brother UK?

Yeah.

But Scott, I wasn't out there.

I wasn't scatting.

No, no.

Would you do Big Brother UK?

Just bravers.

Maybe.

Maybe.

Maybe, you know?

I'm not talking celebrity, Big Brother.

I'm just talking regular, Big Brother.

I would rather do the regular than the celebrity.

I am a reality TV nut, so for that reason, I maybe would, yeah.

Would you do U.S.

Big Brother?

Yeah.

Yeah, but I'd be a novelty in America.

That's true, yeah.

Being Scottish.

I'm sorry, back to you.

No, Scott.

Go ahead, interrogate her.

Gosh, these lights are hot.

Don't think.

Oh,

I'm getting seared and smoked under these lights.

Okay, look, do you want me to talk to the cops for you and just tell them to back off?

What are you?

Some kind of badge, bunny?

I'm gonna fuck your way to the top, Scott?

Wouldn't be the first time, would it?

That is how I got the Comedy Bang Bang TV show.

Listen, Scott, I've got an alibi, but no one's going to believe me.

I need your help.

Okay, what can I do?

I was with my husband's best friend.

Who's that?

He's just a little old man.

Geppetto.

From Pinocchio?

That's right.

Geppetto from Pinocchio.

That's who I was with.

I feel like you're just looking around the room when I ask you questions.

Where's the Geppetto?

Where do you see something that has just been a bit of a picture?

Where do you see my big Pinocchio?

There's nothing with Pinocchio.

I don't see anything Pinocchio.

Where do you see it?

Where?

I don't see a thing with Pinocchio on it.

Also, I have the Geppetto costume from Tom Hanks's Pinocchio

in that glass case over there.

Oh, you're talking about that?

You're talking about that big Geppetto sculpture over there?

Fine, I guess I was inspired a little bit.

Okay, his real name is Chuck.

Oh, you mean the life of Chuck?

We've just been talking about the life of Chuck for the past.

Okay, fine.

That's not his name.

Your music is ending in six seconds, but.

Oh, shit!

His name's Bruno.

Bruno Mars.

Okay, now you're just looking at my Bruno Mars box set over here.

Scott,

that's the truth, okay?

His name's Bruno Mars.

Do you know him?

Uh, yeah, he's a member of Silk Sonic, and...

That's who I was with.

Okay, I don't believe you.

Why?

Because he's...

Bruno Mars is a huge star.

Have you ever met Bruno Stars?

I've never.

Bruno Stars.

Bruno Stars.

That's what he he should be called.

He's one of our biggest.

It's fine.

I was with Bruno Stars.

That's right.

Bruno Stars.

That's who I was with.

Now that I might believe.

Bruno Stars?

Bruno Stars?

He's a Bruno Mars impersonator.

Oh.

He's out on Hollywood Boulevard.

You ever been?

It's gorgeous.

Yeah, I street all the time there.

Do you have a star yet?

I don't.

You gotta get one.

You gotta get one.

You know what?

That's funny, though.

Someone just bought me a literal star.

So I have a star.

Oh, yeah, we're gonna.

Not on the Walk of Fame, but in the sky.

Yeah, just...

It's called Karen Gillen.

Just like in the Doctor Who season 19, or series 19, rather, season premiere, I believe.

What?

That all hinged on someone buying someone a star.

Oh.

Well, then.

You're not watching?

I

haven't caught up yet.

Okay.

Oh, Scott, you've got my butt.

Let go of that thing.

All I did was grab your butt.

I know what they're calling me out there, Scott.

What aside from the rugged ball killer and the squatty buddy killer are they called?

The Gordita Crunch killer, Scott.

Don't tell me your husband had a Gordita Crunch in his mouth.

Oh, he had 45.

Gordita Crunch is stuffed inside him.

What is a Gordita Crunch?

You have so much to learn this.

When's the last time you were at Taco Bell?

I've never been to Taco Bell.

You've never made a run for the border.

No.

That can't be their slogan.

Make a run for the border.

Jesus Christ.

It's a taco, as they say.

Yeah, no, I.

With a

crunchy exterior.

That's right.

It's got a crunchy shell.

Although, I guess

it's soft inside.

Soft inside, but hard.

Hard shell on the outside, just like

Scott.

I was going to say a lot like that.

You can break me into a million pieces and find the pudding inside if you want, but it'll cost you.

First of all, I don't want to, and I don't want to spend any money on this either.

How much, though?

$45.

Cash.

Cash?

Euros.

I don't keep that much money in Euros around.

You must have Euros on you, don't you?

No, we don't use Euros where I'm from.

How do you have the pound?

The pound, yeah.

Yeah.

So if you ever make a trip over there to Ireland, you need some Euros.

It's gonna cost you 25 quid and 35 quill.

Can you pay?

Quill?

That's right.

Like Peter Quill?

That's right.

Or like a literal quill?

Sure.

Go ahead, pay up.

Look, she's reaching inside her pockets.

Okay,

here you go.

Look at all these quills.

It's perfect.

Fine, I'll tell you everything.

Okay, yeah, tell us.

What happened?

What actually happened?

Okay, I was with this guy.

My best friend and lover, Ronnie Hackman.

Why are you looking down at me?

25 seconds.

Can you wrap this up in 25 seconds?

I was with him.

We were having a snog, if you know what I'm talking about.

That's right, we were fucking

snog.

Am I gonna have to restart this?

For fuck's sake.

For fuck's sake, what?

I had sex with them.

That's where I was, and I can't tell.

Hello?

I can't tell you anything else besides that.

If I can't come to the police, people will know I'm a slut.

I can't be a slut in this town.

Not no way, no, no more.

Not after what happened to me when I was a badge bunny.

Yeah,

I mean, I think people can kind of tell just from everything you've said and the way you look.

Excuse me?

What about me, Reed Slut?

I mean, just, you know, the way you dress, the way you act.

Wow, he's about to say I was asking for it.

Go ahead.

No.

Go ahead, say it.

I wouldn't say that.

I just say you look and act.

Like.

Like.

Uh.

You say it.

Go on, you say it.

Now, I think you're beautiful.

Don't get me wrong.

Don't get me wrong.

Skanks can be hot, too.

Look, Kitty, I take it back.

I don't think Karen Karen and I want to get involved in this.

This is

too messy for you.

Can't handle it, can you?

Yeah, I don't think we can.

Little rough rider.

Yeah.

Go ahead.

I'll make you a guitar before you go.

You're looking at my guitar right now.

Oh, that?

That thing on the wall over there?

Fine.

I guess I won't make you a guitar.

I'll make you something else.

How about an airwan juice?

You brought your own airwan juice today.

Beat flavored.

This is mine.

All right.

Look, Kitty, we're going to have to take a break.

Can you stick around, though?

I'm not going to play your music in the next video.

Go ahead, beg for it.

You're going to have to act like this without the music.

Are you prepared to?

I don't know that I can do that, but we'll give it a try.

Maybe every time you talk, I'll restart the MP3.

I don't know.

We'll have to play all three minutes of it, won't we, Scott?

I don't think.

I'll try to ride the fader somehow.

We're going to take a break.

When we come back, we have, oh, the king of the flea markets will be here.

Oh, exciting.

Uh-oh.

Do you know?

My next trouble.

Okay.

I don't want to ask, but we'll be right back with more Karen Gillen, more Kitty St.

Beauregard.

We're going to be right back with more comedy bang bang after this.

You know, when you think about game day,

you might not think Wayfair, right?

I mean, they're two, one's two words and one's one word, first of all.

That's confusing right off the bat.

And then they're totally different

letters, although the A's, there still are two A's, but the G and the M, those aren't in Wayfair and the W and the

Y is in both.

I mean, this is pretty similar, actually.

Game day, Wayfair.

I mean, you might think about it, but one reason you should is because Wayfair, right?

Wayfair is the best kept secret for incredible and affordable game day finds, whether you're upgrading your tailgate with coolers that stay cold or patio heaters that stay hot.

Cold things should stay cold and hot things should stay hot, right?

Wayfair has something for every style and every home, no matter your space or your budget.

They even have decor and merch from your favorite sports teams.

And the best part, Wayfair offers free and easy delivery, even on the big stuff.

And when you're talking big stuff, here's what I ordered from Wayfair the other day.

I mean, when I say I, I mean Kulop.

Kulop ordered a bunch of holiday stuff.

She ordered a giant skeleton for Halloween.

A rabbit sitting with a ladybug.

I guess that's year-round.

That can just stay out there forever.

So, yeah.

So, Wayfair's not only got stuff for game day, but also has a bunch of holiday stuff that my wife likes.

In any case, Wayfair is your trusted destination for all things game day, from coolers and grills to recliners and slow cookers.

Shop, save, and score

goal

today at Wayfair.com.

That's WAYF-AIR.com.

Wayfair, every style, every home.

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Oh, Gecko, I just love being able to file a claim in under two minutes with the Geico app.

Could you sign up?

Sign what?

The app?

Yeah, sure.

Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it.

Could you sign it again?

Anything to help, I suppose.

Get more than just savings, get more with Geico.

Comedy Bang, Bang, we're back.

Karen Gillen is here.

The life of Chuck in theaters this Friday.

Yay!

It's a touching tear.

tear.

You're going to come out and you're going to be like, ow, my tears were jerked out of my eyes.

Yeah, and you'll have an existential crisis, but in a way that you want.

Yeah, exactly.

It'll make you kind of re-examine your life and realize you've been doing everything wrong.

Right.

And then you might fix it.

I haven't yet.

I saw it about a week ago.

Nothing's changed.

Really?

Oh.

Well, maybe it'll kick in.

Yeah, it might kick in.

Yeah, I don't know.

I think life of Chuck plus three weeks.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Like, that's what it takes

to make a change.

Yeah, exactly.

Although, if you look-sorry, I couldn't

interrupted you.

You took a big gasp as if you were moving on to the next thing.

I am going to take a, yeah, yeah.

What were you going to say?

Well, I just wanted to ask you

if you were to look at your life.

Life of Chuck Style?

Yeah, and basically be like, like, if it was ending now, would you be like, I'm so happy with the way I spent my time?

Well, let's see.

I did 110 episodes of the Comedy Banglades TV show.

You were on

episode 59.

I was happy with about

probably 108 of those.

Okay.

I've done 900 and some odd episodes of this show.

I've been happy with about

108 of those.

And other than that, it's been pretty much just a waste of time, I think.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

But I, but, oh, and I made that movie.

But, uh, you know, other than that, yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, it's not been great.

I think that that's pretty good.

a lot of people don't do anything that they actually want to do yeah a lot of people don't get 110 episodes of a tv show yeah come on let's reframe it yeah exactly i got to make 110 now it was in a concentrated period so it was it was over five years so really only five years of my life have been good oh

well it's not too late let's turn it around i don't think i'll get another tv show i hate to tell you

unless we star in it together okay let's do it yeah i'll leverage your talent and your fame your your movie stardom and I'll say, no, she's coming back to TV, but there's a catch.

It's with me.

Okay.

What's our TV show?

We could be...

Like, realistically, could we be brother and sister if like a mom and dad stopped having sex for about 20 years and then had another kid?

Yeah.

Yeah, right.

Got tracks.

Yeah.

Okay.

Brother and sister.

Brother and sister who.

Solve crimes or?

Well, they try to solve crimes.

I don't think they ever solve the actual crimes.

Okay.

Yeah.

Maybe they like make make things worse.

Yeah, yeah.

They get involved and they like, you know, like they got one of those cards from a police officer that says you can stop by any crime scene and do whatever you want.

Oh,

and so they use that all the time.

And they're like, hey, we're going to investigate this.

And everyone goes, oh, they have one of the cards.

Yeah.

And then we look around and then we go, this is too hard.

Yeah, and then go do something else.

Yeah, exactly.

That'd be fun.

Yeah, it'll be like Sherlock and

Watson, but the bad versions.

Yeah.

The bad at solving crimes, because I think those guys are kind of bad personality-wise.

Okay, so maybe we have good personalities, but we're bad at solving crimes.

Okay.

Yeah, we have great personalities.

That's the thing.

That's what's going to sell the show.

Yeah.

And we'll call it the two people with great personalities.

Perfect.

Rolls off the tongue.

How many episodes do you want to do?

Eight.

Limited series.

One episode.

You only want to do two.

You only want to do two episodes.

And that's it.

Yeah.

I get too sleepy.

Okay.

It's too hard.

You could do two long episodes.

Two short ones.

Okay, 30 minutes.

13, is that what you said?

Because I'm on board for that.

I mean, this is going to sell.

This is going to sell.

I think this will sell.

We also have Kitty St.

Beauregard is here.

Zap Dei Zobada.

Little mouse in the house with the microphone.

Zapao, the bow.

You've just been watching the Kim Katrina

video during the break.

Yeah, that's right, Scott.

I had my earphones in.

Why?

Why are you handing me this card?

What's going on here?

Couple detectives, huh?

Brother-sister duo?

You met us earlier.

I could see it from a million miles away.

Okay, yeah.

She's in on our pilot.

I think she's

attached.

Yes, I think so.

I'm fading your music down.

Why?

Who am I?

We have to talk to our next guest, unfortunately.

Or when I say unfortunately, I mean

unfortunately for your music.

I don't know why I'm being so polite to your music.

Why are you being so nice to me?

I've never had a boy be so nice to me in my whole life.

This is how you reel us in, is that right?

That's how I reel you in?

Is that what you said?

That is what I said.

Is that what you said?

Is that, huh?

What?

You're all done with me?

Yeah.

You're going to throw me aside like a piece of trash?

I faded your music out.

We're moving on to the next one.

You're going to make me into a pile of mush.

You just throw down the garbage disposal.

Go ahead.

Do it, Scott.

Throw me down the garbage disposal.

All right, coming up next on the show.

It's his first time on the show.

He's joining the exclusive One Timers Club.

That's fantastic.

Everyone here is in the One Timers Club, other than me.

I'm in the 900 and whatever club.

Please welcome for the first time.

He's the king of the flea markets.

Please welcome Harley Booth Kid.

Let me sit down here, Scott.

I got all my stuff from the.

I was at the markets this morning.

Thank you for having me.

Sure, yeah.

Have a seat.

Sprawl out.

I got a lot of goods for you guys today.

That's a lot.

I got a lot of goods for you guys today.

You brought, oh, so you brought stuff.

You're king of the flea markets and you brought stuff for us.

Oh, baby, did I ever?

I did some deals this morning.

Everywhere I go, I like to do some deals, and I don't want you to be excluded.

Oh, okay.

Okay, great.

This is, by the way, this is Karen.

Yeah, hi, nice to meet you.

Kitty Ram.

All right, here we go.

He knows my catchphrase.

Kitty Ram is your catchphrase?

Yeah, that's what I went viral for.

What in my porno and all.

Very good.

I think

the porno is why you went viral.

Those things are just naturally viral.

It's my catchphrase.

It was when I went ram at the end.

Okay.

When you climax, you go ram.

That's right, like a kitty, like a kitty cat.

Well, it's great to be here, Scott.

I'm happy you have it.

It's great to have you, Harley.

Are you the self-proclaimed king of the flea markets?

Sort of self-proclaimed.

There's definitely a hierarchy bloodline into the flea market world.

Really?

I never know if I'm a part of it because

when I was little, I was born into the flea market world, and I turned my back one day, and my family left me.

Oh, that's so set, meaning your family was involved in flea markets?

They had an importance?

Yeah, we had a booth.

We had a traveling booth.

We traveled the booth all around.

We had all sorts of knickknacks, all sorts of pattywhacks.

Give a dog a bone.

Sure.

There was one day I was crawling around.

I was a booth kid.

That's why it's my last name.

Oh, that's right.

Your last name is booth kid.

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know my real last name, so I was crawling around.

I'd go from flea market to flea market by myself, and they say, hey, there's the little booth kid.

Get him out of here.

So you you lost your parents or your parents lost you?

It seems like you never know.

Okay, so I was crawling around.

I was being a booth kid.

I crawled into a nice cart of bolts, rusty bolts, and I made a little nest.

I took a little nap.

Next thing I know, bang, I wake up.

They're gone.

The bolts?

My parents and their tent.

Oh, okay.

But for some reason, the entire flea market was gone.

Just the bolts were there.

So they left the bolts behind.

Yep, kind of feels intentional.

Felt a little intentional.

Yeah,

because I I would have tried to pick the bolts out around you, maybe for a minute.

No, I was a tiny, tiny little baby.

I was a tiny little booth kid.

Okay, so

it's just an empty parking lot with just a bucket of bolts and you in it.

Yep, and I wake up and I'm like, what the heck's going on?

And so then from now on, since going on from there, I've just been traveling around, you know, flea market to flea market,

trying to look for them, trying to make deals, trying to be the king.

But you are the king.

You say you're the king, at least.

Yeah, but if, you know, it depends on if the bloodline, if I'm part of the bloodline, we have no idea, right?

We have no idea.

So what do you do with these flea markets?

You sell or you buy?

I trade.

I don't have a booth of my own.

I live out of a previa.

The van, that's where I've got all my knickknacks, my paddywhacks, my givea dog bones.

And so I take what I got from flea market to flea market.

I do trades.

I'm the best trader out there.

Okay, give us an example here.

You want an example?

What are some of the trades here?

When I got here,

There was a lot of things in this room that I was willing to trade on, okay?

I'm seeing a few.

What about my geppetto costume?

Oh,

you read my mind.

I've got three geppettos already, but I need a fourth because they're a quad.

Now, Scott, I want to trade with you.

Okay.

I got some things I think you'll be very interested in.

Okay.

Look at what I got here.

These are

antique dental tools.

Antique dental tools.

What era do these hail from?

Definitely before the 90s.

They're rusty enough.

They look terrifying.

You can hang them up as art.

The 1990s?

Yes.

My guy says they're from the 1990s.

I mean, these look like just modern dental tools.

They're not, Scott.

They're rusty and old, and they've been in a box.

Look at that.

I believe that's one of those things you put in your mouth that sucks all the saliva out.

Scott, you ever had that happen to you?

Have someone suck all the saliva out of your mouth?

Yeah, when I go to the dentist.

That's right.

He's got one of of those tools right there, Scott.

I'm just saying,

these aren't like antiques or anything.

They're just like old, rusty dental tools.

All right, okay, okay.

You're not interested in the antique dental tools.

Okay, how about these old bottle caps?

These Coke bottle caps, maybe.

Oh, look at that, Scott.

You could put that in one of your soda pops.

You could put them on a soda pop.

You can make a belt out of them.

I don't know a lot of people who are putting caps back on soda bottles.

Yeah, you drop it off and then you put it right back on.

Because of the top.

Are you killing me?

Or I'm trying to make a deal with you, buddy.

I'm trying to make it.

You've only brought two things.

Well, I got tons tons of stuff.

Hold on.

Okay, what else do you have?

What else?

I'm sorry I'm not interested in the first two things.

I got like a Victorian chair.

Kind of like a nice Victorian old chair.

Oh, Scott, you could sit on something like that.

Come on.

It won't break.

It won't break.

It won't break, he says.

You could sit on that.

You sit up there, nice and tall.

And you swear this is an antique Victorian chair?

Antique.

You can only get antique stuff at flea markets.

Nothing new.

How old would you date this?

Gotta be a thousand years old.

A thousand years old?

A thousand years old.

Scott.

A thousand years.

Karen, do you know anything about antiques?

Okay, actually, this is a bit of me because I love antique furniture.

Really?

Okay.

What do you think of this?

I think it's beautiful.

And I will make an offer.

Really?

Yeah.

I would like your star.

I would like your star in the sky for this chair.

You want Karen Gillen, the star?

Well, the physical star that you have up in the sky.

Yeah, it's called Karen Gillen.

Really?

Yeah, yeah.

Okay.

Oh, that's hard because, like,

I'm gonna die, and no one's gonna remember Karen Gillen, the actress.

Before you do this, I've been inspecting this chair, and there's a little label on it that says Flushengarge.

This is from Ikea.

Oh, come on, Scott.

This has got to be a good chair from IKEA.

Yeah, but these aren't antiques.

This is an antique.

Ikea's been around for 100,000 years.

Come on, liar.

You're a liar.

I almost gave you my star.

Oh, Karen.

No, no, no, no, no, Karen.

Please don't leave me like my family did.

Please, no, please, Absolutely no.

No, I got something for you.

Please don't leave him in a bucket of bolts.

Please don't leave me in a bucket of bolts.

I will.

No, please.

I'm going to.

Okay, okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I got something for you.

He's got something for you, Scott.

I got this.

Antique, authentic, scary clown painting.

Wow, look at that.

You could look at something like that, Scott.

Definitely not printed.

Definitely antique.

I kind of like it.

Yeah.

I mean, it's not.

You say scary clown painting.

It's like, it's not even really scary.

It's more sad.

Okay.

Like he's sitting there in a in a it looks like he has a puddle of his own urine around his ankles and he's crying it's bozo after his show was canceled it's art it's it is bozo you know the early hundred year old show bozo right that's right and that makes it antique and you know what beauty is in the eye of the sadness okay so if you want it you can take it just take it

well no i need the star

yeah why do you need the star what are you gonna do with it because i need something to wish upon oh to help me find my family and find where I belong.

Oh, I didn't think of it that way.

Karen, maybe you should just give him your star.

I think I'm going to give it to you without even taking the clown painting.

Thank you, Karen.

There you go.

Wait, wait, wait.

Before you do that,

are people allowed to wish on stars if it's not their own star?

Maybe if I give permission.

Why is this?

Oh, yeah.

Just give him, don't give them the whole star.

I'll give him

permission.

Just the wish.

Yeah.

Do you need the coordinates?

Yeah, sure.

I don't want to wish upon a wrong star.

Okay, right, right, here you go.

Okay, sliding it across the table.

Gorgeous star.

That's a gorgeous star.

All she did was give you the coordinates, and then I can know exactly which one this is.

I know exactly which one this is.

Look at all this.

You helping him.

You never helped me once.

Never did goddamn thing.

I'm not playing your music.

Better press that space button.

Go on, press it.

All right, I'll press it once.

That's right.

You pressed it.

All right.

Can we hear your wish?

Do you mind?

Oh.

Dear Karen Gillen Starr.

I wish

I could find my family.

And I could go to the right farmer's market to find them.

And I could move out of this previa, even though it's an incredible minivan.

The bucket seats turn around and it'll never flip over because of how it's designed.

And please, just let me find a place where I belong.

I'm 23 years old.

I need a home.

You're only a hundred.

Just a baby.

What?

Did you hear my wish?

You were listening?

Well, yeah, you were talking out loud into the mic.

Yes, I'm 23 years old.

You spent a long life in the flea market.

You look about 80.

Well,

I sleep in boxes of bolts.

Scott, why still?

You own a previa.

My body's used to it.

My bones drop.

Oh, it's like those soldiers who come back from the war and they sleep in the backyard.

Oh, don't bring up the war.

I don't want to talk about it.

What with all the killing and all the shooting and all that jazz?

All right.

I'm sorry we were listening, but you were talking very loudly into the

flea markets, see if I find my family's booth.

Do you remember anything about them?

Maybe we've seen them.

I remember my dad, he was a pretty cool guy.

He had a lot of denim jackets that he wore.

That's what he saw.

He had a beard.

He was 4'11.

Wild.

My mom, she had a beard.

She was 6'2 ⁇ .

They, you know, they sold a lot of knickknacks, Pattywax, give a dog a bones.

Okay, I mean, when you first started talking, I.

Huh?

When you first...

That gets a lot of time.

Was I talking?

Sorry, I keep forgetting you're listening to me.

Usually saying all that if you weren't answering my question.

This is.

You know, I'm usually talking to myself.

You don't usually make it talking about you.

You know, you're talking right now?

Am I?

Is that what this is?

Yes, you are.

Jesus, I need a family.

Yeah, I look, I don't know anyone by that description.

The 411 part threw me.

I thought originally you were talking about perhaps Henry Winkler or Fonzi.

But I don't know what that is.

I don't know who that is.

Well, you're only 23.

Why would you?

I don't know.

Yeah, I'm one of the last living people to know what Fonzie was.

Oh, Scott, don't talk about yourself like that.

Like some kind of old guy, some guy who's had a podcast for 100 years.

Don't talk about yourself like that.

Don't talk about yourself.

Go on, press the space.

I don't think I will.

I'm going to go back to Harley Booth Child over here.

Yeah, Harley Booth kid.

I'm no longer a child.

I'm a kid now.

You're a booth kid.

But

maybe you could put out a plea here on Mike for them.

Yeah, that's why I wanted to come on here today.

Mom, Dad, if you're out there,

I'm going to be at the

grocery store farmer's market on sunset.

Why would the grocery store have a farmer's market the farmer's market's my world that's how i identify and view all the world oh i see you know you're the grocery store farmer of market you walk in it says ralph's on front and it's got different booths that are sometimes they take all the produce they put it outside for a farmer's market that's exactly right too you know and that's like a waste of time they don't let me trade butcher in there anymore i feel like i'm losing my touch a little bit with the trading talk back to talk to your parents again oh yeah yeah mom are you were you listening to that

why are you listening

I think you're saying your inner monologue out loud.

Oh, that's part of it.

Well, you're at, okay, you're asking me to do things and say things, and I don't understand that that's talking.

All right, mom and dad, if you're out there, I'm going to be at the grocery store farmer's market all day tomorrow.

I'm going to be doing deals.

I'm going to be hitting up produce.

I'm going to be sleeping in boxes.

Okay.

If you get out there and you're listening to this, please come get me.

I'm in the previa.

That's beautiful.

And if you're out there listening, also go see Life of Chuck.

This are people going to be listening to this?

Yeah, including hopefully your parents, right?

I mean,

okay, yeah, hopefully.

You seem confused by how everything in life works.

Well, I'm just, my life is farmers' markets.

I know.

You never had parents, I guess.

Never had parents.

I've never teached everything.

God, that breaks my heart.

Nah, it's okay.

I'm the king.

Self-proclaimed.

But you're really, you're not the king of the flea markets.

You're just a poor, filthy orphan.

God damn it, Scott.

What the fuck?

Can I ask you something?

Please, you ever buy things off other people, you know, if things just sell later on?

By buying, do you mean trading?

Absolutely.

Because I've got a ring for you.

Take a look at this.

Holy Guagamole, that's a nickname.

That's a big old rock.

That's right.

Thank you, Scott.

Well, where'd you get this ring?

This is your husband's ring?

Oh, I know what they're calling me out there, Scott.

The minivan killer.

Why?

Because I ran him over with a minivan.

Was it a previa?

It was.

It was a privia.

You reminded me.

It's a great card.

It'll never flip over.

Where'd you get the previa?

I traded for it.

I traded a bunch of globes for it.

It was a good, good trade.

That's when I was in my prime when I was 21.

What can you get for this ring for me, huh?

Oh, I got all kinds of bottles.

I got one bowling pin.

I got

silverware.

I got.

Your face is not interested in any of this.

No, no, no.

Not all that.

I want something more special.

Something important.

Come on.

I got a photo album.

They're all very old.

All these people are dead.

Sold.

Yes.

It's perfect, Scott.

You take a look at this.

So you get this photo album.

That's right.

All these people are dead.

This is.

They're not.

The photos aren't.

This has been 2023.

Well, you gotta assume these people are dead.

Why?

Because it's two years later.

Yeah, but did they everyone in here die in a car accident or something?

Why would you have this photo album?

They were all killed by the van killer.

Oh, no.

What?

All your victims?

You killed all these people?

Well, come on now.

I didn't kill all of them.

Just some of them.

And you took them.

The ones that were husbands.

Huh?

You took photos of your victim?

That's right.

This is your photo album?

That's right.

I took a couple photos.

What's the big old deal?

Come on, we've all got iPhones now.

Yeah, I went to CVS and got them printed out.

Sure.

You taking photos, the excuse of we all have iPhones now

doesn't make it better.

Yeah, it took a couple of weeks for them to print them.

And sure, then I had to go find a photo

booth,

photo book, I should say, which was very tough.

Just go to Target.

Yeah, then I went ahead and put them all in and I glued them in.

Sure.

Sure, but what's the big old deal?

You got a problem with that?

I do have a...

I mean, mainly with the killing, the photo of it just, you know.

I mean, it's kind of gauche.

Scott, why do women have husbands if not to kill them?

You know what I'm talking about?

Amen.

I don't, Karen.

Karen, you ever killed a husband?

Not yet.

You're a relative.

You're a relative newlywed, though.

Yeah.

Silly little bad.

First time.

There is time.

Go ahead, press the space button.

I'm glad I got at least one deal down.

The king is back on top.

You're the king.

That's why we call you the king.

I'm the king.

And you got this ring.

I mean, that's an expensive.

It's a, it looks like a wedding ring.

I could get another privia for this.

That's a mermaid cut, that one.

Ooh, is it from a dead guy?

That's right.

And it's going to get me a pretty penny at the flea markets.

Wow.

Well, congratulations.

This is incredible.

We haven't found your parents, but hopefully.

Were you listening to that?

Yes.

Oh, my God.

I'm looking for my parents.

I can't believe you were listening.

Yeah, yeah.

No, hopefully your parents are listening, and you know, hopefully they'll hear this.

And next time you come back, we may have a happy ending here for you.

Please.

I would love to come back.

I would love to have you back.

But you know what?

We are running out of time.

Unfortunately, the only

feature that we have time for right now is just a little something called plugs.

then we plug the bag.

Ooh, nice.

That was Take the Stage and Plug the Bag by Charles Whitmore.

Thanks to Charles Whitmore.

If you have a plugs theme, head over to cbbworld.com/slash plugs and upload it.

And you can be famous for a week.

And Charles Whitmore, you are famous.

Enjoy this week.

This is the week of Life of Chuck.

So great week to be famous.

So, but speaking of Life is Chuck, Karen, what do you want to plug here?

Oh, like projects?

Yeah, projects.

Yeah, this is the plug bag.

You can plug anything you like.

Projects.

You can plug loved ones.

You can plug happy people.

Go ahead, plug your husband.

Come on now.

Yeah.

Shall I plug my husband?

Yeah, go ahead.

That would be great.

Okay.

How do you plug things?

You just sort of describe them.

I guess I've never really thought about this.

This is an existential question.

Yeah, like...

Much like the ones in Life of Chuck.

That's true.

How does one plug things?

I don't know.

Like, I mean, it's promoting, really.

Okay, my husband's a nice man.

I'm glad I married him.

You could say, like,

my husband is out there

seven days a week.

Yeah, he's out there seven days a week working hard, working his fingers to the bone.

And being your husband and

yeah, just, you know,

directing a film.

He's away.

Wait, really?

He's away directing.

What is he directing?

We can plug that.

Oh, okay.

It doesn't have a title yet, but it is filming.

Okay.

So I think it's called the pizza movie right now.

The pizza movie.

This is a code for it, or will it be something like the pizza movie?

It's to do with pizza.

Oh, is there like a real existing pizza movie?

No, no, I just mean sometimes you call a movie a different word.

Oh, yes, like chips, and it's nothing to, like it's Thor.

Well, chips was a movie, but.

Oh, okay.

Well, Thor was

code name was Chips when I was.

Chips, like

the California Highway Patrols?

Like the fries.

Oh, I see.

Chips.

Okay.

Chips.

Spelled the same way other than, I guess, chips, the California Highway Patrols, is spelled capital C, capital H, lowercase I, capital P, lowercase S.

Interesting.

Anyway, look it up.

Dak Shepard movie.

He directed it.

Oh, I remember this movie.

And Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3 was called Pop-Tart.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

My movie was called Pineapple.

Pineapple.

Yeah.

That's fun.

Yeah, it was fun.

And then we figured out no one cared.

But

so that movie, the Pizza movies is going to be out

on Hulu at some point.

On Hulu.

Fantastic.

And then Life of Chuck obviously comes out this Friday in wide release.

What else do we have going?

Traitors season

five,

maybe?

Maybe, maybe.

Yeah.

I mean, I would like to.

Okay.

Well, let's put that out into the universe.

Okay, I'll go on Traitors.

And

what else is happening?

Probably make another Jumanji film.

Yeah.

Ruby Roundhouse.

That's right.

I forgot the first name that time.

Jesus.

So that will be out next Christmas.

That's fantastic.

And

then

were you announced as one of the Avengers in the upcoming Avengers?

Or do you even know, like, what happens on that?

Do they call you up one day and go, like, hey, get your head over to Atlanta and we'll just wear whatever you want and we'll CGI your body?

Oh, no.

I do four hours of makeup when I play that one.

Oh, you really?

Yeah.

But you don't have to anymore.

Well, with the CGI, they could just erase everything.

They can,

but do they?

No, but there is an argument for doing it practically.

Yeah.

You know, it still looks slightly artificial with CGI.

That's right.

So when do you go back and do the next Avengers movies?

I don't know that I am.

You sneak.

I want to break some news on this show.

It's been so long since we broke news.

Okay.

God, the days where they played clips of this show on the Today Show when Zach Alfanakis complained about a certain Hollywood A-lister.

I long for, oh, I don't want to say embarrassing last name.

Scott, say it.

I long for those days again.

Well, we've got to say something controversial then.

That's right.

Come on, Scott.

Say something that'll get you in the news.

Let's go.

Are you going to be in any of the Spider-Man movies?

Any of the Sony Spider-Man movies?

No?

No.

I don't know.

Grassman and Straw's here.

We need to make news.

Okay, yes, I am.

Okay, good.

Yep.

And are you playing like Madame Webb's sister or?

Yeah, okay.

Like Lady Webb.

Lady Webb.

I'm playing Lady Webb.

What are her powers?

She can see the future, right?

Madame Webb.

Madame Webb.

Madame Webb, that elegant lady.

She could see possible futures, I think.

And nurses Coca-Cola for longer than anyone in the planet.

Have you seen that?

I, yes, and then and then the entire, I believe, climax of the movie is set next to a Coca-Cola sign, I think.

What are these Coca-Cola images all about?

Like, what does it symbolize?

I wonder.

What could this be about?

What was this filmmaker's choice?

I don't know.

I mean, it was a brave, audacious choice from a filmmaker.

But

so,

Life of Chuck, though, that's the most important thing.

That'll be in theaters this Friday.

Yes.

And you do great work in it.

And let's move on to Kitty St.

Beauregard.

What do you want to plug?

Scott, what do I want to plug?

Is that what you asked?

Yeah.

Is that what you want me to do?

Go ahead and plug something important.

Sure.

Well, I don't don't know.

I guess I should plug my husband after all.

You know what they're calling me out there, Scott?

The...

Well, no, I don't.

They're calling me the J.

Crew killer.

J.

Crew Killer?

That's right.

Because he was wearing J.

Crew when he died.

Dressed head to toe in J.

Crew.

Head to toe?

Head to toe.

Hat and

shoes.

J.

Crew makes shoes.

They make shoes sometimes for women, yes.

So why was he wearing them?

He was wearing a pair of flats.

Ballet flats, Scott, when he went...

Got died on that squatty putty wrapped in that ruggable rug.

Fell on the rug.

Fell on the rug.

It rolled.

Rolled into the minivan.

Toppled over.

I'd like to plug CBB World, Scott.

You've heard of it, haven't you?

Yeah, I've run it.

What, you listen to it in your little ears or whatever?

Not really.

Usually making the shows.

I like a couple of shows on there.

Which one?

Changed my life, going deep.

Hey, Randy.

Never heard of it?

I've heard of all those, yeah.

What about the other?

Okay, pretty good.

What about Scott Asn's Seen?

You like that one?

Okay.

I see what you're trying to do.

You're trying to break me down.

It won't happen.

It's not going to happen.

No way, no how.

And do you want to plug anything like Deli Boys or?

Oh, sure.

Plug Deliboys.

St.

Dennis Medical, Rogers, Gemstones.

What else?

What else?

Not much else.

All right.

All right.

Harley Booth Kid, what do you want to plug?

Oh, I got lots of plugs.

I'm going to be plugging different farmers' markets in the next few days.

I'm going to be at the grocery store farmer's market.

I'm going to be at the Targers Farmer Market.

I'm going to be at the gas station farmer's market.

These are just places you're going?

Yep.

Yep.

And they're going to be good farmers' markets to go to.

Also, I do want to plug, there's a great

theater farmer's market called the Groundlings Theaters Farmer's Market.

And there's a show going on there called Glow-in-the-Dark Groundlings.

It's a great farmer's market.

Lots of trades.

You're going to laugh.

You're trading laughs for laughs.

And then it's a good time.

So you're trading money for show, and then trading laughs for a money.

Laughs for laughs.

Yeah, that's how it does it.

That's flea market.

So, like, is it guaranteed if you go and laugh, the performers will laugh as many times as anyone in the audience?

Absolutely.

That's what makes it such a great show.

By the end, you're all just laughing, and it's not even a show.

And you would enjoy a show like that.

You just forget while you're there.

It's great.

Great.

Well, I want to plug.

Look,

you know, Kitty St.

Beauregard said it.

Head over to CBB World.

It's great over there.

You can get every single episode of this show, ad-free, the entire archive, as well as every live episode we've ever done, as well as new shows like the aforementioned Hey Randy, and this book will change or save your life.

I don't even know what it is, to be honest with you, Scott.

And off-book, what is the one you do?

Going deep?

Going deep, yeah.

Off book.

My God, he's getting white women confused again.

It's easy to do.

And Scott hasn't seen my show where I review movies that I haven't seen yet.

And we have the College Town, the Neighborhood Listen.

So many great shows over there.

All right, let's close up the old plug bag.

Try to make me go to behave.

I say it.

All right, that was Rosie and the Trucks by heavens.

Jam banned a lot of expensive samples in that, but we're willing to pay for them.

You know how hard it is to have a perfectly placed fart fart sound, Scott.

That was perfectly placed.

No notes on that.

Thanks to them.

Thanks so much

to Heaven's Jam Band for that.

And I want to thank our guests.

Karen, so wonderful to have you on the show for the first time.

Thank you so much for having me.

And good luck with all of your projects going forward and with this one in particular.

And I want to see the pizza movie.

This sounds intriguing.

It's going to be on Hulu.

Yeah, I mean, I'm not in it, but why aren't you in it?

Because your husband's directing it.

What's going on with that?

Well, it's set in college.

I'm a wee bit old.

I don't think I'm passing for college now.

I couldn't even get it out of my mouth.

No, you tried.

I sounded like a liar.

I tried.

I tried.

I attempted to.

I said the first couple of words.

I appreciated the impulse you had.

I think he should have put you in it.

I don't care how old you look, he should have put you in it.

Why couldn't you be a teacher?

Come on, now we could.

Yeah, actually.

Or maybe like

R.A.?

Yeah, a resident advisor.

Yeah, though, I keep hearing that, and I don't know what that is, but it sounds like it could be a lot of people.

It's the old weird old person who hangs around with the college clubs.

Who answers all the questions for the audience?

That's me.

What did you say, Harley?

I said, that's you.

The weird old person that hangs around.

I'm 23.

Do you know what we're listening to right now?

What?

Oh, God.

Is that what this is?

Yeah, this is a podcast.

Well, thank you, Harley.

Great to meet you.

You're welcome.

And Kitty St.

Beauregard, I want to to thank you.

Of course you do, Scott.

I knew you were going to thank me the moment I walked in here.

Well, that's yeah, it's polite to thank a podcast guest.

Go on.

Say something else nice about me, why don't you?

I mean,

for all of your faults, you seem to be a mass murderer who takes pictures of your victims.

That's right.

You've been an entertaining guest.

Oh, that's sweet.

Hey, why don't you pour some of this powerade into a

bowl and we could both slurp it up like little kitties together.

Just this syrup that you've made out of this.

Spread, I boiled it down.

Come on now.

You know you want a sip.

I really don't want to get on the floor.

Okay, I guess.

Get on the floor, come on.

All right, you want us to just lick this up like little kiddies?

And then I want you to go use that litter box over there.

They call me the litter box killer, Scott.

Okay, I feel like you're gonna kill me if I get into my litter box.

Oh, come on now.

I wouldn't kill someone like you unless you were married to me.

Do you want to get married?

Sure, I do, Scott.

Karen, are you a a Universal Life church minister by any chance?

I actually am.

Do you mind marrying us here?

But are you sure you're gonna be okay?

Because all of her ex-husbands are dead.

I promise I won't do a thing, Scott.

She promises, Karen.

You know I love her.

You just mean I have to give the ring back.

That's right, give it back now.

Perfect.

All right.

I night pronounce you husband.

I'm

not.

Wow.

It's so easy.

Come on now, Scott.

Come for a little kiss.

Mmm, here we go.

Oh,

gosh.

That's enough.

It's real.

He got too close.

That was hot.

Was it?

That was, I mean, for me, that was super hot.

That was fine.

It was just fine.

And they lived happily ever after, right?

Sure, Scott.

Sure, there's it.

Bye.