Double Buggle (Kyle Mooney, Beck Bennett, Anna Bezahler, Isabella Escalante)
You can check out Kyle and Becks new podcast, "What's Our Podcast" here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/whats-our-podcast-with-beck-bennett-and-kyle-mooney/id1834487732
Listen and follow along
Transcript
Boy, Sticker Shock, huh?
You know what I'm talking about.
I'm talking about prices.
They're going up, up, up, up, up.
At the gas pump, the grocery store, rent.
But you know what?
At Metro, they got your back.
They actually have lowered their prices and they're giving you a five-year price guarantee on talk, text, and data.
One line, now 20% lower.
Family plans, also lowered.
Oh, get this.
You get a free 5G phone, all with no ID required, no activation fees.
So stop by your neighborhood Metro store.
Visit metro byt-mobile.com or call to find out about their amazing offers.
Bring your number, not available if currently at T-Mobile or with Metro in the past 180 days.
Guarantee covers monthly price of on-network talk text and 5G data for customers activating on an eligible plan.
Exclusions apply.
Details at metro by T-Mobile.com.
Your co-workers eating mystery leftovers.
Again, but you, you respect your lunch break.
Grab a new toasted pizza sandwich from Jimmy John's.
Yeah, toast it.
Try the Sicilian salami, capicolo, ham, rich marinara, gooey mozzarella, and oregano basil, all on golden French bread.
Or go cheese mode with the three cheese, Parmesan, provolo, and mozzarella, dripping with marinara and herbs.
Hot, melty, seriously satisfying.
Order one, Fronta, Jimmy John's new toasted pizza sandwiches.
Oh, that's good.
At participating locations for a limited time while supplies last.
Oh no, I have to shit.
Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang.
I don't know if I like that too much.
Thanks to the shit guy for that catchphrase submission.
Boy.
All right.
Well, that was submitted in January of 2023.
I hope you've done it by now.
But if not,
feel free.
You have my permission.
Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week.
And my name is Scott Auckerman.
We have an exceptional show.
Coming up a little later, we have a couple of entrepreneurs.
We stopped having entrepreneurs on the show for a while.
We just had small business owners, but now we're back to having entrepreneurs on.
So, this is very exciting.
We also have a couple of guests all the way from New York City.
So, that is coming up a little later.
So, that's very exciting.
But let's get to our guests of honor.
They are actors, they are comedians, they are writers.
One of them is a director, I think.
I think is right.
Yeah.
And a musician.
We'll talk about that in a second.
Now they are slipping down the show business ladder, the rungs, down to podcasters.
We'll talk about how far the mighty have fallen.
They both were SNL cast members, and now they're podcasters.
They have a new podcast that is out now.
It's called What's Our Podcast.
Please welcome back to the show Kyle Mooney and Beck Bennett.
Hey, great to be here, Scott.
Great to be to be here.
Thank you for having us.
Yeah.
You are so welcome.
Now, one bit of business that we need to tidy up.
Last time I talked to you, Kyle, you were going by Kyle M.
Yeah, yeah.
You were a musician.
Yeah, yeah.
That was really interesting.
Now you're Kyle Mooney.
Yeah, and I'm so, I actually am really so happy that you brought this up.
Okay.
And by the way, thank you for having me.
I always love being here because I'm like, okay,
it's going to be entertaining, but there's also going to be a level of artistry and creativity.
And I think, right and so I you know for a while I would look at other people's Wikipedia pages and I would see
a section called artistry yeah and I would say how do you get one of those and I never had one and then the fans heard me complaining about it and now I have one and I want to obviously want to say congratulations about all that Wikipedia stuff of course um I yeah so yeah last time I saw you uh I was putting I put up put out my album The Real Me out on Stone So Records, which I have on vinyl here.
Have you listened to it on vinyl?
I have not.
Because my record player is not working.
I had one over here that didn't end up not working.
I bought one just because this came out on vinyl.
Oh, wow.
It ended up not working.
I had to return the whole thing, so I ended up listening to it on Apple Music.
Oh, okay.
Well,
I definitely want to get you a phonograph player because the sound.
Okay.
But yeah, no, I'll take you up on that.
Yeah.
When can he have it delivered?
All right.
Just let me answer the question real quick about the music stuff real quick.
Oh, yeah.
I apologize.
I'm sorry.
No, no, you're good.
Hey, Kyle, I'm sorry.
You're all good, Scott.
I actually like, people don't know this, but I like playing around.
I never knew that.
But you're not answering the question now.
Yeah, no, so.
So you wanted to answer the question, and then you're like, I'm playing around.
I don't know if we're going to focus on this the whole thing, because obviously we're here together, and I didn't make the album.
So I'm not Kyle.
I know you're not including this question.
No, because I want to apologize to you, Betty.
Oh, no, no, no.
You're good.
I just want Kyle to try to get to it because sometimes he likes to play around, but he also wants to be harmful.
I didn't know he liked to play around so much.
Yeah.
Sometimes I like to play around, but sometimes I actually like to get down to business, which is, it is one of those times.
Okay.
Let's get down to business.
I apologize for interjecting.
And Beck, I apologize for not including you in this question.
We'll talk about Superman in a second.
Thank you, because I do want to talk about Superman.
And I apologize for jumping in when it wasn't my turn.
I just.
All good.
I've known Beck for a long time.
I'm cool with him.
How long have you known Beck?
I've known him since September 2003.
And why do you remember September?
Is that because you were in school together?
Yes.
School had just started USC.
Yeah.
Does that bring back any memories?
Oh, my gosh.
I almost just ran out of here into my
Kyle's homeroom.
I'm still making music as Kyle M.
You are still making music as Kyle M.
Yes, but I've decided that, you know,
linking up with Beck, who I've known for so long, we've been talking about working on some sort of project.
And the podcast felt like a good way to sort of re-enter
who I once was and doing.
Well, also, he's known you as Kyle Mooney for so long.
Yeah, absolutely.
I would imagine it's weird for Queen Latifah, people who knew her before she changed her branding.
You know, people just know her as Danielle.
I imagine the same thing.
It's exactly like the Queen Latifah stuff for me.
Or, you know, if you knew Prince, you know, back in the 60s, would you call him that squiggle?
Remember that?
I think it was, yeah,
I think it was sort of a protest.
Fucking hilarious.
I think it was sort of...
It was hilarious.
I think it was sort of a protest.
It was actually RIP.
I think it was sort of a protest against his record label, Warner Brothers.
But yeah, the music people over there at Warner Brothers.
Is that where your album came out?
It was Stone Stone Rock.
That's actually where Superman came out.
But Warner Brothers.
Okay, let's move on to Superman.
But I still will be putting out music.
That is the real me.
That's who I am.
That is the real version of myself.
But I want to expand and I want to be able to do other creative
outlets.
And the podcast is one of those.
Fantastic.
Let's talk about Superman.
Ah, thank you.
Yeah.
Cal El.
Cal El.
Yeah, that's his given name.
Yeah.
His Christian name.
His Christian name.
Yeah.
Although, are there Christians on Krypton?
First of all, there's such similar words.
It would be very confusing.
Yeah.
Like, hey, what church do you go to?
Oh, the Christian one.
Oh, the Krypton one?
The Christian one.
Yeah, we all go to the Krypton one.
Yeah, everybody.
No.
So I think that's why they had Christianity there, and they got rid of it for that reason.
Okay.
And they all became atheists.
But yeah, Superman.
Now, you're
an interesting fact about Superman, you're in the movie.
Yeah.
That just came out.
That's absolutely right.
I play Steve Lombard, who is a co-worker of Clark Kent.
Up here.
Yeah, up here.
Not of Superman.
You're not flying around
with the cape or anything like that.
No, but I do fly around
in a craft in the movie.
Sure, yeah, but not of your own power.
No, no, no, no, no.
That was designed by somebody who's just a great engineer, Mr.
Terrific.
The power of flight, we mastered this in the 1800s.
Yeah.
And it's been going great.
It's been going so well.
Everything just keeps getting better.
We have different kinds of flying crafts all the time.
And it's really, really cool to be a part of that with Superman.
So, yeah, I'm a peer of Clark Kent's, and we work together at the Daily Planet.
I kind of have a lot of opinions.
And
I'm so proud of Beck.
I think he was amazing in the movie, too.
Yeah, are you bummed?
You're not in it?
I mean, like, I guess I, you know, I've read Superman comics my entire life.
Yeah, yeah.
There's not, you know, not really a Kyle Superman.
Yeah, yeah, they don't have many.
Big glassed
beard.
Yeah.
Big glasses beardo.
That would be, yeah, they don't want to have that sort of character.
Maybe they should start writing one in, though, and you can be in the sequel.
You know, if it's another chance to work with Beck, I'd be down, but also, like, I love when he gets to do his own thing, and like seeing the Steve Lombard character come to life has been
Lombard, yeah, Lombard, yeah, yeah, however you say it, it's really been like Lombard, it's really been a fun watch.
Thanks, man.
I love the album, too.
I've listened to the whole thing.
I have, it took me a little while, but I did see it.
And you've seen the movie and you've listened to the album.
Yes, yeah.
And I think that there could be a collab, honestly, yeah, for like the sequel, the Superman sequel.
Maybe Superman album has a record player and he pops on one of Kyle M's Digital Society.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think Digital Society would be perfect.
I would actually love,
I would love to put a song on this.
Yeah, James Gunn is a huge music fan.
Maybe next time Mr.
Terrific starts shooting aliens or whatever the fuck he's going to shoot and your song comes on.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm trying to think of something new.
You think it's going to be called Superman 2?
I don't think so.
Okay.
What do you think it's going to be called?
Blast Off?
Blast Off?
Is that Superman Colon Blast Off or just Superman's Colon?
I don't know.
Yeah, I don't think it's I don't think it's that kind of movie, Kyle.
Okay, Kyle, get Kyle in the writer's room.
Maybe it's uh Superman's Colon Blastoff is the name of the second movie.
I don't think so.
Maybe so.
So, Kyle.
Maybe we'll
love your ideas.
We love your creativity, but we don't think so.
Give him in the recording studio.
Yeah,
it could be something.
The colon blast off could be something.
In any case, boy,
Superman's out.
Kyle M's album is out, but then you guys collaborated so much
in comedy and in college together.
You met in college.
Did you collaborate in classes too?
Did you take tests together or anything like that?
Never took tests.
Like every other question?
Yeah.
I remember trying to ask if we could do that.
Yeah.
I don't remember the board, the, you know, the college board, like
them ever getting back to it.
They never even responded.
Yeah, you know, like, we went to like a big room where they're all sitting at a a table and they're like, sort of like the parole board, if you've seen the Menendez Brothers kind of thing.
Exactly like the parole board.
And we were like,
we motioned to take classes together and test together.
And they said as one entity.
Yes, as one entity switching off.
And they said, like, get the fuck out of here.
Really?
Yeah.
And then we're like, we'll wait for your answer.
And then we're going to be like, interesting response.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was pretty harsh.
They swore.
Yeah, that was really scary.
That was a a really good thing.
Pardon me for my
friends.
It was an intimidating day, but
yeah, that's something that happened.
But you came through on the other side.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Better for it.
Better for it because we never were able to take classes together, which sucked.
But we were in a native province sketch.
Yeah, he was an acting major.
I studied film.
That's right.
Yeah.
Isn't it so funny?
Because you were an acting major back.
Yeah.
And you've acted since then.
Yeah, yeah.
And then, Kyle, you were a film major and you've made a couple of films.
I mean, you directed one.
yeah that's true yeah you directed one and you you wrote another one right yeah yeah and then you started it and it was not brother bear which we covered it was brigsby bear i covered brigsby bear yeah yeah and we watched brother bear together yes and we're we are i think we're due to watch brother bear we're gonna watch the sequel yes coming up next year yeah yeah that's exciting isn't that exciting have you ever seen brother bear i don't think i have i mean you've never shown it to me have you joaquin phoenix is the uh voice of wow isn't it funny
joaquin phoenix yeah his name's joaquin and then he's in walk the line yep it's like should he just change his name to walk the line phoenix
yeah
that's what i was wondering too we were actually having walk the line he drove me here we were having a conversation about that what's going on why do you drive you here what's going on with your car you know i just get uh it's it's more of a fear thing about sort of driving myself and those honks can be intimidating yeah
oh okay
that is not that is not mankind actually not cool yeah so i and i and I know that Kyle's pretty scared of the road and all the honks.
Like, it's not the cars, like you said, it's the honks.
Well, there's this and then, so I offered it.
I was like, hey, you want to ride, pal?
He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that'd be great.
You know, if there were to be an EMP electromagnetic pulse that took out every car horn in the world, wouldn't that just be a glorious thing?
Oh, my gosh.
New York City would be a little bit quieter, I'll tell you that.
Yeah.
Maybe people get some sleep in that city for once in their goddamn lives.
It would be
fully different.
Speaking of which, New York City is where you cut your teeth as performers on the fable
institution
Saturday Night Live.
Nazim Pedro.
Look at that.
He's doing this.
You're doing 2010.
The 2010, 2011.
Not 1975.
Yeah.
Saturday Night Live,
it was amazing.
It was so crazy.
A lot of disappointment.
Sketch comedy.
I think disinhabitants.
But disappointing.
A lot of hard work.
A lot of hard work.
I thought it was going to be easy, breathing.
Characters, impressions.
Yeah.
Characters, impressions.
Yeah.
Live, video.
Right.
The audience.
The audience sometimes was on video, sometimes live.
You're right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was the whole thing.
They had a lot of B-roll of audience just in case one didn't show up one week.
They were like, because a lot of people don't know if you're in New York City and you're outside 30 Rock, which is short for 30 Rockefeller Plaza.
Exactly.
A lot of people get confused.
There are people outside handing out flyers going, yeah, watch a live comedy show, watch a live TV program.
And some weeks, people just don't show up.
No one comes.
And it's an empty theater or an empty studio.
Yeah.
And so then you have to cut to the audience on video, just going,
well, Scott,
this might kind of make you might blow your brains out or something oh i hope not
that would be rough
you know we did these
we did these uh shows during covet 19.
i don't know if you remember the oh yeah i remember the novel coronavirus is that what you're talking about and those were practically empty audiences really who was there you know we had some first responders there oh good
kill them yeah yeah well no
that wasn't a plan but that's and that ended up what happened really
So now we're down to second responders?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you do not want second responders in the world.
But I was thinking they could have used their always pressing snooze.
Yeah.
They could have used those video clips of those audience members when we had an empty audience.
Oh, really, Kyle?
Is that what you think?
It's just something I was thinking when you were talking about that.
That would have been a good opportunity.
Okay, okay.
All right.
My water.
Yeah, I think that is your water, isn't it?
Because I didn't pour myself one.
Yeah, feel free.
Oh, yeah.
A couple of hydrogen molecules
for every oxygen molecule.
Sure, that'll do that right down
what you wanted to.
It's still good, folks.
Now, Saturday Night Live, of course, the Cone Heads.
Yes.
The Blues Brothers.
Right.
Caveman Lawyer.
The Unfrozen One.
I mean, yes, right.
Yes.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Because I work there, I get a little casual.
Oh,
I'd prefer that you keep it a little profesh.
I am sorry.
I don't work there anymore, and I should be professional.
Yeah.
Now, did you go back to, I heard they had a big, big celebration.
Yes.
Back 15th anniversary.
You guys are pointing at each other.
Yes.
Well, you were there.
Because I remember that, and you were there.
50th anniversary.
Yes.
Of Saturday Night Live at 30 Rock.
Yes.
Yes.
And it was the music part.
Sandler.
Sandler.
Whoa.
And Schneider.
SNS?
Yes.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was a lot of fun.
It was great.
Did you see Frank Gillespie there?
She was a writer.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, cool.
Yeah, we saw her.
Anyone else you're curious about?
No, that was.
And we gave her a big hug.
Oh,
and we sat and watched music together.
Paul McCartney played.
Bonnie Rait.
Yeah, there was, was she there?
At the musical thing on Friday.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
That's cool, right?
The chance to see Bonnie Rait.
Come on.
And
Nirvana with Post Malone.
That's right.
So it wasn't Nirvana.
It was post-Malone.
It was like post-Nirvana, maybe.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Like, literally, because it's after Kurt Cobain.
Yeah, we were actually having the same conversation when he was dropping me off.
I was like, oh, it was sort of a post-Nirvana thing.
Yeah, it wasn't as much dropping you off here because I'm here too.
So it was kind of like I was just driving us here.
And I should apologize about me saying what I just said.
No problem at all.
Because remember, I am here and I'm just sitting here right next to you.
And I dropped off.
And I do forget sometimes that you're around around when you're around.
Yeah, and you're used to being dropped off because you don't like driving because of the honks.
That's true.
Well, we're all caught up at this point.
Now,
let's hear about this new art form that you are dipping your tiny little toes into.
I was hoping he'd ask.
Yeah, and as you said earlier in the intro, you mentioned us sliding down the slippery ladder of the entertainment of the story.
Yeah, because
you've both been in movies, Superman primarily.
Yeah, primarily.
And I also remember remember Detective Bender and Brigsby Bear.
That's right, yes.
Of course.
Never forget Detective Bender.
Superman 2 Colon Blast.
What was it called?
Superman Colony Blast.
Okay, okay.
All right, so I made a mistake.
So I made a mistake.
The guy makes one mistake in the podcast.
And then you've been in TV shows.
I don't think it should be called Superman Colon Blast.
That's not what I was trying to say.
I'm just thinking about why the ladder of the entertainment industry is so slippery.
It's so slippery at this point.
It's almost as if some jokester has been out out there, like
taking a paintbrush and putting oil all over the runs of the ladder because you guys were on top.
You're on top of the ladder.
Superman is out in theaters, and people are saying, Oh, I do believe a man can fly.
Yes.
Steve Lombard, of course, flying around in the flying around in the T-Craft.
Yes, exactly.
You can hear him yelling.
And then suddenly, Smash Cut to just a mere two months later,
your podcasters?
What is happening?
What's going on here?
Really hard time in the industry.
Nobody knows which way is up or which.
Hopefully, Superman does.
Yeah, because I would hate to see him go up, up, and away.
And you just plunge straight to the core of the earth.
And he's on fire and he's burning.
Yeah.
He's dead.
He's dead.
And then all of a sudden, the Chicago Bears are there.
Oh, and Ditka's like.
85 Chicago Bears?
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
The fridge.
It would be amazing.
But unfortunately.
The refrigerator.
The refrigerator.
Sorry.
I can't close the control.
Thank you.
But yeah.
You didn't work with him.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I did not work with the refrigerator.
Okay.
He's hard to work with.
Oh, really?
Oh, Andrew.
He's really big.
He just kind of pushes himself around.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He probably has some
pointing to my brain.
You're pointing to
CPT or is it CT?
I think it's CTE.
CTE.
It's Chat GPT.
It's ChatT.
Chat GPT.
He has Chat GPT.
In his brain.
So it doesn't work very well.
Yeah.
But yeah,
we kind of fell apart a little bit, our careers.
And now we're, because now we're starting a podcast.
It's true.
The album actually didn't sell as much as I had hoped for.
And you really have to push.
What did you hope for?
Just sort of people knowing it.
So you just hoped that people would know about it.
Like you run into somebody on the street.
Oh, great album.
And you've never heard any kind of response.
It's happened a couple times.
But that's kind of maybe why you went on tour and set up shows so that people could tell you those things.
That's right.
Last we spoke, you were going on tour.
And it's been amazing.
I got to meet so many folks, but those are people who sort of already know the album.
You wanted people to,
okay, so I'm confused because, yes, the album came out, people listened to it, then they came to your show, and you're disappointed with it.
But there's because they already know about it because
they came out and then they listened to it.
There's a whole nother amount of people that didn't come to the show that don't know about it.
So you wanted everyone in the world there.
That's hopeful.
And just like in the streets, kind of like, that's Kyle M.
Because I feel like that's the way it works for the other older.
for post-Malone, yeah, for post-male, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jellyroll definitely has that, yeah, and he released his own stuff on YouTube pretty much, and he just blew up.
And maybe you're a little jelly roll that you weren't fronting Nirvana at SNL 50.
I was jelly rolling the sheets that night, absolutely.
Um, talking about what were you in the sheets, Kyle,
uh, that's that's uh, that's for my one and only a Cinnabon in the sheets, perhaps, yeah, yeah, jelly roll in the streets, a cummy gummy, if you will.
Just, I'm like, come, gummy, gummy, you know what you
i don't know i i don't know i i i i'm not gonna pull on that thread
lest this whole thing unravel
but yeah no it's exciting to do the podcast yeah what
what uh what what what's the okay first of all it's called what's our podcast yeah which seems to be a bit perhaps metatextual yes in terms of the title of it what tell me a little bit about this piece of art that or perhaps maybe just even content.
The premise.
Art is very, yeah, we're not sure if we're there.
We don't want to be the ones to determine whether it's art or not, but the podcast, the purpose should decide.
The artistry section in Wikipedia.
If we get one of those on our podcast,
but exclusively about the podcast.
Yeah.
Okay, great.
Yeah.
The premise of the show is that we don't know.
Speak up.
Come on.
Don't be up there.
The premise of the show is that we don't know what our podcast should be about.
So we have guests come on and pitch us ideas for what they think our podcast should be about.
And then we give it a try and see if it works.
And so it's a new theme every week.
Yep.
That's right.
Okay.
New podcast.
And we're genuinely searching for our podcast.
We have a lot of people.
And you know, you can imagine Beck and I, we're novices.
You know, we're trudging the wall.
We're trying to figure out the whole podcast.
You're this is a pro.
I mean, like, I put in my 10,000 hours.
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Baby.
And
that's about as many hours as I want to put in, quite honestly.
I'm searching for an off-ramp at this point.
But now, you guys, how long is this podcast every week?
I would assume it's like 10, 12 hours or.
Yeah.
Well, unfortunately, we've only done like every episode is about an hour, hour and a half.
We've tried to do 12 hours, but it just was not working.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was way too long for one episode to do 12 hours.
Okay, how many episodes have you done at this point?
Probably about 14.
Yeah, and are you on Time's top 100 podcast yet?
Well,
we're coming out on Wednesday.
We're coming out.
Okay, it's out already by the time this episode comes out.
By the time the episode comes out, but by the time we're talking about it right now, it hasn't come out.
But by the time it comes out, it should be on Times Top 100 podcast.
Yeah, and I think that'll hopefully boost the Real Me album sales too and sort of
awareness of it, I guess.
Do you talk about it on your podcast?
Or is it quite a bit?
Or is it only this?
Quite a bit.
I'm hoping to, Becca.
And we haven't really had the full conversation.
Yeah, this is kind of the news to me.
I would love to spend a little more time, like have a little corner of the the podcast where we sort of talk about the album and see how we can like outreach and get more people aware of it.
Podcasts don't really have corners.
They're pretty much a straight line.
Like you press play and then it's a straight line.
And he's one of the one of the kings.
What he says is law in the podcast.
You could do a podcast that you end it like in the middle of a sentence and then it starts over and it's the middle of the sentence that you just ended.
And then it would be circular, but still no corners.
Okay.
Okay.
I think that's something that we're going to try on.
I don't need to do the corner thing.
But we're going to do the thing where we end an episode mid-sentence and pick up with that sentence on the next episode.
Yep.
It'll be something like
this.
That's really cool.
That's really cool.
That's really cool.
But yeah, we were like, hmm, we don't know what our podcast should be about.
Maybe it's that.
What's your favorite podcast?
Probably Comedy Bag Bag.
Yeah.
Cool.
It's a good one.
It's a really good one.
You should check it out.
Classic.
Oh, I love it.
It's not on Times Top 100 Podcasts.
Outpay.
Hey, what are you going to do?
What's the finest accolade you've received?
In life?
I was talking about for the podcast.
For the podcast?
Finest accolade.
Huh.
I think the AV Club once called it funny or deliciously funny or something.
That's huge.
Yeah, yeah.
Deliciously.
The now defunct AV Club.
Perhaps coming back.
Yeah.
Audiovisual Club.
A lot of people don't know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
They do the audiovisuals.
I think, did we ever win a Webby?
Who knows with those things?
You know what I mean?
Let us know in the comments comments if we've ever, if the show's ever won a Webby.
A little.
Just go ahead and press pause right now and let us know in the comments if the show's ever won a Webby.
And then press pause again, which should unpause it.
This should be two different buttons, don't you think?
It's very confusing.
Yeah.
It's like, well, like, what?
I'm supposed to press pause again?
No, I don't want it paused.
I already have it paused.
Where's the play button?
You ever get that, Kyle?
You ever kind of stumble around there?
I had a conversation about this with a friend of mine recently.
Was it on the drive over here when you were dropped off?
I was actually talking with you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
On the drive over here.
And I did drop you off, actually.
Yeah.
And then I kind of fixed the parking of the car, and then I got out of the car, too.
I dropped myself off.
It was a two-drop-off trip.
Yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Doing us both a favor.
Yeah.
It's pretty cool.
Yeah, we've always looked out for each other that way.
We actually live.
This is, this might...
kind of blow your brains out here, Scott.
Again, I don't know if you're going to be able to do it.
It is a little scary to say what you're about to do is going to blow his brains out.
Yeah.
We actually live close to each other.
So we
carpool, you know, the two of you do.
Yeah, yeah.
Was that intentional or was that a happy accident?
That was a really, really happy accident.
Okay.
So did you buy your houses on the same day and then you walk out the front door and look at each other?
Yeah, you and we, but
I can't get away from this guy.
And we, I'm sorry, I'm here.
Here's Johnny.
Remember that?
Yeah.
I was just talking to my buddy about that.
The face through the door.
About what?
The shining or Johnny Carson?
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure either.
Kyle actually did that as a prank to me when we moved in.
He took an axe to my front door.
Then he put his face in and said, here's Johnny.
And it was so scary.
It was really upsetting.
At what time?
It was right around like...
like bedtime for my son.
So like he was going down.
We were kind of getting everything quiet.
And we hear this axe at the front door chopping it down.
We're all scared.
We call the police.
Then Kyle sticks his glasses through the window.
The little crack.
Here's Johnny.
That was eerily accurate.
Oh, thanks, brother.
I love that.
It was really upsetting.
That's so fun.
Well, you know what else is fun is the podcast.
What's our podcast?
It is out now.
Now, you guys are, how long do you feel like you're going to do this?
Are you guys just dilettantes?
You're going to do this for like 20 episodes and then you're out?
Or what's going on?
Maybe.
That actually really could be it.
Sounds pretty much like a celebrity SNL, former SNL cast member podcast commitment.
We don't have the grip.
You You know, we don't have, we don't have the balls.
We don't have the backbone.
We don't have the
feet or the legs.
It doesn't have legs.
It's courage.
Yeah.
And none of the body.
You don't have
the chin, the waddle, the eyebrows.
Yeah, none of that.
How about you?
In the process of growing this podcast,
were you ever like, ah, this is taking too long?
Or was it a hit immediately?
When did
you start at the forefront?
When did you commit?
When is it like, this is, I mean, you know, I started out just as a simple, simple man with a dream and the email address of every famous comedian in Los Angeles and I just grew it from there and it was just you know it was a it was a commitment but labor of love labor of love that was all it was yeah and now we're here now we're here that's fantastic yeah you know we've come
to the end
of this segment
And I have to go to commercial.
But did you talk about your podcast enough?
Or is there anything else you want to say?
It's just really nice to do this, to get back together with my friend and goof around in a room.
And you came to listen.
It's been a lot of fun.
Check it out.
More like the rubber room.
You guys are so crazy.
I bet this podcast
is crazy, too.
Like the condoms or something, because me and Kyle are always wearing condoms.
Well, babe, I'm glad you're practicing.
This comes back to my cummy gummy stuff.
Well, What's Our Podcast is out right now.
The first episode.
Who's on the first episode?
Fran Gillespie.
Fran Gillespie.
Yeah, Fran Gillespie.
Two mentions in one episode.
Wow.
We got a two-episode release.
It's Fran Gillespie and Mark Maron.
Fantastic.
You know, he's not doing that WTF anymore.
Maybe you guys could.
Oh, maybe we should talk about that on the podcast with him when he's on the episode.
Yeah, take it.
No, no, just take over his show.
I would love to.
Oh, WTF.
Yeah.
I think we tried, but he locked the gate.
Oh, yeah.
He always talks about it.
Of course, me and B might want to change the name to DTF.
Oh, hell yeah.
That's a nice high five.
I love that.
We got to get more high fives on this show.
So I'm glad that you started a trend.
Hopefully.
Yeah.
Do another one.
Yeah, I love it.
I'm just sitting here, but no one's offered me one, but that's all right.
No, no.
It's too late.
It's too late.
But you know what is not too late?
Is it is not too late for you to listen to What's Our Podcast out right now, a special two-episode premiere, one with Fran Gillespie and one with Mark Marin.
And we need to take a break, if that's okay.
When we come back, we're going to have a couple of entrepreneurs.
Can you guys stick around?
I'd love to.
Yeah, we'd love to see an entrepreneur.
yeah okay there is going to be a couple live in person let's take a break when we come back we're going to have more kyle mooney more beck bennett more comedy bang bang right after this
the best b2b marketing gets wasted on the wrong people right
i mean i i remember once i bought tickets for a broadway show and for the next six months I kept getting ads for the show I'd already bought tickets to.
I kept saying, I know, I know I was on the website.
I know I visited the website, but I saw it already.
Sometimes it just doesn't work.
Well, LinkedIn has grown to a network of over 1 billion professionals, and that's where it stands apart from other ad buys.
You can target your buyers by job title, industry, company, role, seniority, skills, company revenue, oh, so many things.
All the professionals you need to reach in one place.
Stop wasting budget on the wrong audience and start targeting the right professionals only on LinkedIn ads.
LinkedIn will even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign so you can try it yourself.
Just go to linkedin.com slash bangbang.
That's linkedin.com slash bang bang.
Terms and conditions apply only on LinkedIn ads.
Boy, sticker shock, huh?
You know what I'm talking about.
I'm talking about prices.
They're going up, up, up, up, up.
At the the gas pump, the grocery store, rent.
But you know what?
At Metro, they got your back.
They actually have lowered their prices and they're giving you a five-year price guarantee on talk, text, and data.
One line, now 20% lower.
Family plans, also lowered.
Oh, get this.
You get a free 5G phone.
All with no ID required, no activation fees.
So stop by your neighborhood Metro store.
Visit metro byt-mobile.com or call to find out about their amazing offers.
Bring your number, not available if currently at T-Mobile or with Metro in the past 180 days.
Guarantee covers monthly price of on-network talk text and 5G data for customers activating on an eligible plan.
Exclusions apply.
Details at Metro by T-Mobile.com.
This episode of Comedy Bang Bang is brought to you by Squarespace.
Whether Whether you're just starting out or maybe you're scaling your business, Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online with Squarespace's collection of cutting-edge design tools.
These are real tools, by the way.
It's like a hammer.
Squarespace reached out and they said, we invented a new hammer.
It's cutting edge.
I said, please, hammer, don't hurt him.
And we all laughed.
But in any case, they have some great tools.
And anyone anyone can build a bespoke online presence that perfectly fits their brand or business.
Start with Blueprint AI, Squarespace's AI Enhanced Website Builder to get a fully custom website in just a few steps using basic information about your industry, goals, and personality to create premium quality content and personalized design recommendations.
And every dream needs a domain, doesn't it?
Well, Squarespace Domains makes it easy to find the best name for your business at one fair, all-inclusive price, no hidden fees or add-ons required.
Head over to squarespace.com slash bangbang for a free trial.
And when you are ready to launch, use offer code BangBang to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Comedy Bang Bang, we are back here.
We have the hosts and proprietors, I would assume.
You guys own this podcast?
Maybe not.
Our podcast?
Yeah.
Yeah, we own it.
You own it.
Who are you doing with?
We're doing it with Headgum.
Headgum.
So they probably own the RSS feed.
I don't know.
You don't even know what an RSS feed, boy.
Oh, well, that's the thing.
Welcome to podcasting, guys.
I'm no scum.
You actually don't know what it is.
Difficult transition.
Do you know what CPMs are, my dears?
That's the thing.
Count,
power, money.
Yeah.
We got in one.
All right.
Well, guys, Kyle Mooney and Beck Bennett are here, of course.
What's Our Podcast is the podcast.
Special two-episode premiere just occurred, and those are out now.
Anyone could turn this podcast off and listen to them.
But why would you do that when we have such great guests coming on right now?
Is that right, guys?
Yeah, don't turn this off and go listen to our podcast.
Stay here.
This is a fantastic podcast.
Thank you.
Stands the test of time.
I appreciate that.
Well, let's get to our next guests.
They're returning.
They were on the show a few months back.
They are, I believe they're the owners and proprietors of the website cooldickshoes.com.
Please welcome back to the show, Austin and Tony.
Hello.
Hey, thank you.
Good.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
They're high climbing.
You said we wanted to see more, and we're coming in with humility.
I honestly wanted someone to offer me them, but
now that I have to ask for it again, I'm just going to reject them.
So don't bother.
And therein lies our problem.
Oh, you guys have a problem?
Welcome back to the show, by the way.
Thank you.
I'm sorry to hear you have a problem, but let me just explain for Beck and Kyle.
Austin and Tony are,
I guess, your
schoolers.
Yeah, we had a business where we, well, basically, we sold shoes where we drew penises on them.
We thought they were you could choose your own, you could choose the penis that was drawn.
Oh, that's amazing.
That's a great idea.
There were three styles, and they had different prices, and it was an incredible business.
However, it did get away from us a little bit.
Yeah, we got a lot of orders on our real online website.
It was a real web.
You came in here with a real website that people could order these shoes.
Yeah, Yeah.
And we kind of thought when we were asked to do this podcast, we didn't know that people listened to it.
Yeah, that's a problem.
Unaware.
We didn't think we would get orders.
And then we kind of found out we had a supply and demand issue.
Yeah.
There was a lot of demands.
A lot of demands.
Zero supply.
Zero supply, and my dad wouldn't let me hook up my PayPal to the website.
So I had no way to make money or get money or anything.
Yeah.
And I'm the CFO, so that's like really embarrassing for me.
Yeah, chief financial officer.
That's correct.
Can I ask a question about the business?
oh
you guys would have a shoe and you you would draw on the shoe and and send the the people the shoe who ordered it or would they send their shoes in and you would draw on their shoes did you ever figure that out i can't remember ideally it would be the first one um however we didn't have access to shoes
yeah we had no way to get money and jason manzuka said he would invest and then we forgot to email him and slash didn't know his email address we didn't have his email address though we did guess it a few times and now we are in contact with a wonderful man in Florida.
Oh, good.
Okay.
Is it a different Jason Manzoukas?
Yeah, it is.
Yeah, it's not him.
Oh, no, but he has an alligator skin business, and we're interested in learning more about that.
So we're meeting up next week.
Yeah.
Another problem we're having, all the girls in our class got really mad at us.
We thought these dick shoes would be like really funny and awesome, but actually like...
All the girls got mad and now putting it on.
What is there to get mad about?
It's just a fun project.
I mean, would you order some of these shoes?
Absolutely.
I wish I could.
I mean, if you guys had the shoes and you were able to fulfill the orders and everything, I would definitely order some cool dick shoes.
I would definitely.
You said because you said that there are three different types of dicks that you can put on the shoes.
Let me show you these.
This is a real website.
This is
the Mr.
And this is the Tony, and then this is the Austin.
Oh, wow.
By the way, your guys' name are Austin and Tony.
Oh, Austin and Tony.
And these are representative of your.
And actually, we'd really like to get away from that website website as we are rebuilding our brand.
We are rebuilding our brand and coming in with humility.
I think we lost a lot of people's trust, but yeah.
The girls in school.
The girls in school
and all the orders we couldn't fulfill.
Yeah.
People are pretty upset.
We come in with humility and we come in with a plan.
Yeah.
The Austin was $100, by the way, and the Tony is only $40.
I was wondering about that.
And why is the Austin so much more expensive?
Oh, we value it at an emotional price.
We're getting away from it, though.
Okay, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry to keep coming up.
Prom is around the corner, you guys.
Prom is around the corner.
All the girls are in school.
It's really around the corner.
It's right around
the corner.
Exactly.
Yeah.
And
we're not in a great spot here.
No.
So we're starting a new company.
Okay.
It has a website.
What year are you in school, by the way?
We're about to be, we're seniors.
We're seniors.
You're about to be seniors.
We're about to be seniors.
Okay.
Which means...
We're juniors.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, you must be starting school.
It's right after labor, or you know, very close to Labor Day.
That's right.
Correct.
Sorry, maybe it might actually be Labor Day today.
So, you might be starting tomorrow.
Is that what it is?
Happy Day of Labor.
Happy Day.
And so, we encourage you to now go to our new website.
What's your new website?
We sell printers, not dick shoes.com.
Okay, so that's a real website.
It's a real website.
You guys, and you sell printers.
Yes,
I want to see this website.
We currently have printers for sale.
Okay, yeah.
Let's see.
It says, Don't be mad.
Printers.
Printers.
Don't be mad.
That's a message for the girls.
Along with a picture of you both.
With mustaches.
We're serious now.
We sell printers only.
We are not liable for what you print on your own printer.
Then you have a picture of the cool dick shoes with a almost like one of those Ghostbusters symbols, but you know what I mean when I say Ghostbuster symbols?
Yeah.
Big red circle with an X.
This is more of an X, though, because I believe the Ghostbusters just have one symbol.
Yeah, yeah.
We're not trying to get into legal trouble with Ghostbusters or any more trouble at all, really.
I think the Reitman family might have some words with you if you were to just do especially if there was a ghost or slimer.
Yeah.
AKA Onion.
And then there's a little section that says our printer collection.
Yeah, we have three printers for sale, and we have four total printers.
So what we, well, the problem we ran is...
We have three for sale and four total?
Yeah.
There's three for sale and four total.
One is we have two of them.
Yeah.
Okay.
Three for sale.
Yeah.
So one of the models we have double.
So you have four total that you're selling, but three styles.
Yeah, exactly.
Got it.
The prices vary in a sort of substantial way, right?
Yeah.
So printer number one is
$1,302.88.
Yeah.
And tell me about this printer.
So it's at his dad's work.
Yeah.
And that one is easy because a lot of times I go with my dad to work and he goes to a meeting.
I can go in there and get the printer.
Exactly.
So easy access for you.
Yeah, but still it's like a little bit tough because there's people in the halls, so I'd have to like sneak past them, either putting a printer in my shirt or backpack if I could get one.
Maybe you could get like a long trench coat and have it be the head, you know?
And oh, so like I would play the character of a printer as I walked out?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, dude, you can do that.
You think?
Okay.
How would you do it?
Can you make a printer noise?
Oh, Xerox.
I actually don't think Xerox was a sound effect.
I think it was the company.
Oh,
I bought it.
So, yeah, if Scott was there, you would have been.
Well,
I'm a savvy printer buyer, so I know these guys.
Oh, you like printers?
Well, also, a Xerox isn't necessarily a printer.
I believe it's a copy machine.
Oh, shit.
Shit, dude.
This appears to be an Epson, though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's one of the premier models that we have, so that jacks up the price.
Maybe Epson is onomonopoeia in some way.
Like, Epson, Epson, Epson.
That sounds like
printed pages coming out.
It does.
It does.
Epson, Epson, Epson.
Now I have my paper.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
So that one, that one's $1,300 and change.
Yeah.
The only printer number two is $40.
Yeah, because we have two of those.
Yeah, and that one's just at our, that's in, that's in our houses.
That's in our houses.
It's easy to grab.
We priced it at the work for us.
Because obviously, what happened with the dick shoot thing is that we had a bunch of customers, but we didn't have a supply.
So now we're asking for the chain to start with the customer to create the question of which we answer.
I'm lost.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Try to try to re-say that phrase
in more of a way that would make sense.
That makes sense, guys.
Yeah.
So, and just to be clear,
yeah,
we are a little stoned.
We smoke for focus now, noticing.
It's medicine for us, but yeah, we're men now.
We used to be boys.
You weren't your seniors at this point.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
How old are you?
Are you 17 still?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
You'll turn 18, though, in the middle of your senior year, perhaps.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
Exactly.
That's what we're going to happen.
And then we're moving out immediately, and we're living in the shed.
Yeah, yeah.
My parents have a shed and we're going to live in that.
You're not moving out if you're still.
No, because, well, we have our own roof and stuff.
What are you guys talking about?
Oh, it's their roof.
If it's on their property and they're paying for it, then you're just living in
one of their roofs.
I guess you could own the roof, though.
You can work out some sort of a deal with your property.
Well, we're not trying to move out of the roof.
We're trying to move out of the house.
Right.
But the house has a roof, right?
Of course.
Does the shed have a roof?
Yeah.
Because you're still under one of their roofs.
I didn't know you could have multiple roofs.
I thought you
could have one.
Yeah, we apologize.
Kyle, anything you wanted to say?
I understand the roof confusion.
But I guess I'm just curious.
So
if I'm a potential customer.
Yes.
But you are.
Everyone is
absolutely.
If you want to be an entrepreneur, you have to look at everybody.
Everyone is a potential customer.
The hope here, in theory, like I'm mostly drawn to the $40 printer.
And I believe there's one more, which is how much is that?
Yeah, the printer number three is $12,022.64.
And that's the one that I'm more drawn to because I like flashy things.
I like to just spend a lot on stuff.
And so I can talk about it and bring people over to my house.
You're getting a lot of those sweet Superman Zids.
Yeah.
Residuals.
Yeah.
I have to do something with it.
I'm in a big movie.
I have to have fancy printers.
What are you going to just hoard cash like their old newspapers or something?
No.
You got to spend it.
No, that's what I do with old newspapers.
And cats, of course.
Yes, of cats.
Cats, of course.
Cats.
You have a lot of cats?
Of course of cats.
Old cats that I stack and put.
Old cats, new cats.
New cats and old cats.
My old cat, the ones I've had for a while are old, and the ones that I just got are new.
Anyway, but it's not about my cats.
I just like buying flashy stuff with my Superman residuals to show people that I was in a big Hollywood movie.
So I'm interested in that one.
Which congratulations, by the way.
That's super cool.
Yeah.
You're the first people to say that to him.
I can tell.
Yeah, that's really nice of you.
Thank you.
I've been waiting for that.
We saw it.
We saw a lot of the street.
You know, it's like one thing for the people in the theater to know about the movie, but to me, like, just random people, just because they already saw the movie.
Yeah, they knew about it.
We saw so many TikTok recaps that it was like we saw it.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Well, that works.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, thank you.
No problem.
So what are the differences of these?
Why is this one $12,000?
Okay, the way that pricing works is, and I'm the CFO, so I think I can speak speak to this the way that pricing works is that we
The work we have to do
you got it.
Okay, I'm finding it the work you have to do go Okay, I'm finding it the work you have to do to get this printer
Which is harder because it's farther away and basically we need a party bus.
Yeah.
Oh, we need a party bus for prom like one with a like a pole in the middle
yeah oh my god.
Can you imagine?
Oh, dude, I'd get on that pole and swing around.
No, it's for the girls.
Oh, yo, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, it's not for us to play on, bro.
With like neon lights and a CD player and stuff.
Yeah, CD player.
Can you imagine?
Man, I would jump around with that thing.
Yeah, yeah.
It might skip if you do that.
That's good.
That's like a remix, right?
Yeah, in a lot of ways.
Yeah.
Always wanted to be a DJ.
Do you have people you're taking to prom with you?
It is a...
Sadie Hawkins.
Yeah.
A Sadie Hawkins prom?
Which means the girls choose.
Yes.
I see.
So, and you're here to let everyone know you're on the market, I would imagine.
And we're serious.
Yes, we're serious.
You will go if someone asks you.
Absolutely.
No, I'm going to say no.
No, please don't give me a hand job.
Like, what?
Like, what?
Like, yeah, we're just going to take the party bus through Burger King.
Yeah, no, we're going to prom.
Just so you manage your expectations.
Not everyone gets a hand job at prom.
I mean, I did back.
I did not.
You did not get a hand job at prom.
I don't think so.
Did you wait till you got home?
Yeah, and I get, well, from myself, I got one.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That's it.
I'm shouting about you.
I got a little more, actually.
Whoa,
no.
Kyle's cooler than Beck.
Okay, cool.
Let's hear what you're talking about.
I'm finding that out right now.
This hurts.
Okay.
We're getting hand jobs, though.
You're getting hand jobs.
I think so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're not going to be like Beck and have to do it.
Yeah,
it's great to be optimistic about that.
But so
you need a party bus.
You know, you can just rent one.
Yeah, with money that we will have from our printer.
This printer is particularly hard to get.
Why is it so hard to get?
Because it's, well, my dad works in a bank, and it's the printer that they use to print the money.
Whoa.
Wow.
They're printing money that the bank uses right there.
That's what my dad said.
Oh, interesting.
I mean, the sound,
yeah, I don't know.
It sounds like plates, maybe?
The U.S.
bent is typically the place where they print money.
Oh, yeah.
We would love to get our hands on that.
Yeah.
That's a good printer.
fort knox have you ever heard of that yeah i have but i heard that they got rid of all the gold or something that like yeah i heard it trumping that trump was saying it's empty that there's some sort of government thing yeah it was weird yeah but i was just like okay that sounds i mean
yeah i mean i don't
know oh god the economy dude it's gonna be soft these printers all gold's gone i know dude well you know they're trying to get rid of pennies too they're trying to yeah they're trying they're trying and trying to just keep turning up everywhere you look yeah that would be a good thing if you guys could collect all the pennies.
Help collect all the pennies.
Oh, yeah.
Don't throw them out.
Give us the penny.
Yeah, don't throw them out.
You give us the pennies.
Can you imagine
every penny in the world and a giant coin star that you dumped it in?
Oh, man.
Oh.
Cha-ching, cha-ching.
How big would that coin star be?
Talk about printing money, dude.
Oh, God.
And then you get a hand job after.
Yes, I guess.
Or more.
Or more.
More shit, dude.
Can you imagine?
Kyle.
If you're just right there at the coin star.
You see all these pennies going through printed money.
You're just going to just hang out at the coin star getting handed.
Maybe you could stick your dick into the coin star.
Yeah, dude.
What happened then, I wonder.
It turns into coins or dollar bills?
I don't know.
It depends on how much your penis is valued at.
I guess that's one way to find out.
When you guys went to prom, did you go with someone that you love?
I actually did.
Whoa.
Several times.
Yeah, I think so.
Oh, you loved them at the time.
At the time.
Actually, ooh, no.
That was
still in love.
Still in love.
Yeah.
I loved this girl I went with.
I'm married and have a child, but still in love.
Never got over.
Yeah, never got over.
Okay.
Yeah.
How about you, Kyle?
Did you love?
I was in love with the person I went with.
And you never know.
They might be listening on the other end.
Was it reciprocated?
Yeah, I think for a moment.
She broke up.
It sounds like more than a moment with what got on the brad.
Sounds like it was.
Maybe it was just a moment for you.
You know what I mean?
Think about baseball.
It was a fun-ass night.
What can I say?
I bet.
Yeah, because, yeah, we want to go with someone that we love, but the person we love most in the world is each other.
Oh, that's so cool.
That's awesome.
You guys could go together?
Neither of us are girls.
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
It's okay.
Yeah, these days, anyone can go to prom in any kind of combination.
The entire school could be one couple.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
The school wants to be a couple?
Then we don't have to go through the humiliation of waiting to be asked.
It's a hard position to be in.
It's impossible.
It's terrible.
But you've been really good.
You've been strong.
I feel like I've been, yeah.
He changed his walk.
Yeah.
Oh,
I guess I've never seen you walk.
You've always been sitting here when I entered the room.
Yeah.
How did you walk before?
I get here early.
How did I walk before?
Yeah.
Dude, I did the water polo classic.
I don't know what that is.
What's the water polo?
You don't know the water polo classic?
Dude, how old are you guys?
I mean, no,
29-ish.
Yeah, Yeah, 29.
29 or 40.
Okay, so old.
Yeah, super old.
That's probably why you don't know that.
What is the water polo classic?
It's relaxed, shoulders back, kind of groin first, sort of, then legs.
So lead with groin, some wavy legs.
You were a worried day I would bump into stuff.
You probably would.
You might.
The point of the win.
Yeah, that happens.
Work up.
That's a good point.
Yeah, usually when I walk, I'm just like waving my arms in case I hit anything.
Then it'll be my arms that hits it instead of my groin yeah that's smart you can also get a cane that checks for stuff
oh yeah yeah then you can cut and line and stuff yeah yeah that's good
so how do you walk now oh now I walk with um uh
now I do the businessman, which is I always have my hand kind of down in case I need to grab like a briefcase.
Okay, people.
How often does that happen where you're walking down the halls of school and there's a briefcase that you need to grab?
Not yet, but I'm thinking of planting some.
Please don't publish that.
Don't can we hurt that?
I'll see.
Our editing machine has been broken for a number of years, probably like a decade at this point.
Oh, my gosh.
I'll see what I can do, though.
I'll run it up the chain.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay, cool.
But yeah, so I basically try to do more of a hand-forward,
just balanced walk.
Okay, great.
Yeah, that sounds awesome.
So you've been changing your walk.
Yeah.
Just make yourself more appealing.
I want girls to know that I'm someone that you could look to for like security
you know a lot of women want that you know they're looking to hook up with someone who will provide for them yeah right kyle yeah yeah yeah i mean i you know i've i always i'm always trying to figure out what women want right but uh but yeah that just that sounds that sounds accurate yeah yeah just watch
the movie with uh
millie g one of our millie gibbs one of our ambassadors okay well give me about 95 minutes oh it's gonna be a little closer to 120 i believe
It's a long one.
Okay.
I would say we should watch it together, but unfortunately, we watched that for our 100th episode of Scott hasn't seen it.
Yeah, but you'll come back for Brother Bear 2.
Okay.
Oh, that's one of my favorite movies.
Oh, you like Brother Bear?
I love Brother Bear.
We just watched it.
How much do you remember about it?
I can't remember the character names, but the plot, I feel like I was.
Were you guys Blackout?
Oh, they were Blackout.
It was hosted.
Watch Brother Bear.
Dude, you guys lived the life.
You were in movies.
You have a tequila company?
You're best friends.
I don't think we have the tequila.
Did we start a tequila company?
I would love to.
We've not started.
Oh, fuck.
Actually, I do think that the three of us?
That would be great.
I think that we would really tap into an untapped market.
The five of us?
The five?
You guys aren't 18 or even 21 yet.
So I don't know if you've been able to get it.
Yeah, maybe tobacco.
Sorry about that.
Okay, yeah, it can be the tobacco wing of the column.
Yeah, when was the last time there was a new cigarette?
Yeah, that's a good point.
What about a new alcohol?
What about tequila flavored?
Also, the other thing is, what about a new shape of a cigarette?
Because they're all long and skinny.
What about square?
Oh, yeah.
Or like a.
And it's just.
Yeah.
I think that's a great.
That's a great thing.
Just like a wide.
Oh, I see.
It's as wide as you can.
You can kind of put it in between your teeth.
Yeah.
And just puff it.
Like a sugar cube.
Yeah.
And yeah, some people might say, like, oh, why do you have a giant sugar cube in your mouth?
It's like, no, I'm smoking.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like that.
I think that's great.
Yeah.
That is cool.
Or maybe we'll do that, the three of us, to make money.
Yeah.
But we were just part of the talk.
Yeah.
You keep waiting for me.
When you're 18.
When you're you're 18.
Yeah, come see us when you're 18.
All right, I'm 18.
No.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday.
He's 18.
Oh, now here's the cake.
I'm 18.
I mean, Kyle's dumb, but he's not stupid.
Is he not?
I'm not that.
He's a dumb fucking idiot.
He's not a stupid.
I've done some stupid things, but I'm not as stupid as people think.
I'm actually a little smarter than people think.
Oh,
do what?
What are you smart at?
I'll test you.
I love numbers.
Okay, what's five plus nine?
Do you like adding them together?
14.
I know that shit.
See, look at that.
Not bad.
Not bad.
He doesn't even
hit me again.
Number square root of 69.
Hell yeah.
That would be my prom night.
Hey!
Monday!
Hell yeah!
Come on!
See, everyone to me!
Hell yeah.
Whoa.
Wow.
I really want you guys to go to prom.
I I want you to find somebody you love.
I want you to get the party.
Or you could go together and love each other.
We should, dude.
You think so?
I mean, well, hey, let's see how the printer sales go.
Yeah, because you might be able to get a party bus.
You can't get a party bus without it.
Why do you want a party bus, by the way?
Because that's where people finger bang most of the time.
They finger bang in a party bus.
Most of the time.
Most of the time.
You know that's the best sentence in the human language.
What is this now?
That's where people finger bang is the best sentence.
No, no, no, no.
Finger bang in a party bus.
Finger bang in a party bus.
Finger bang in a party bus.
Oh, Kyle M, is that a song?
Yeah, you know, I like to try to keep myself a little outside of the blue material, a little cleaner.
But, like, if we could come up with a
metaphor or a synonym, like, um, your album doesn't have one of those parental advisories.
No, it's actually fully clean.
There's not really a lot of explicit stuff
happening, but you know, maybe, sorry, the phrase is finger banging in the party bus.
Finger banging the party bus.
So, what if it's like finger fun,
finger fun in the party bus.
You can say party bus, yeah.
You can definitely say party bus.
I still feel like it's like I would under, you know, I feel like I would get party bus doesn't seem like timeless enough either.
I feel like fing, yeah, um, maybe
uh hand in hand, hand in hand,
hand in hand as the carriage goes, hand in hand on the road,
something else is happening,
hand in hand on the road,
hand in hand on the road, uh, yes, gonna
need some snacks.
How about some nuts and raisins and a big stick of pepper rope?
Yeah, hand in hand on the road.
I'm so sorry.
Something's happening down there.
I know, that's too literal.
Hand in hand on the road.
I think I found something.
I think I found a secret inside.
Hand in hand down the road.
Hand in hand on the road.
I feel like I'm going to like this ride.
Hand in hand on the road.
I think I found a secret inside.
Hand in hand on the road.
I think I'm gonna like this ride.
Don't unload your load
on the road.
Yeah, that's that's pretty good, too, honestly.
What Don was doing.
Yeah, I was, I was just kind of just, I was kind of more, more like, well, you know, sometimes it's good to hear terribly shitty things.
Yeah, exactly.
But if that inspires you to go, like, oh, no, I should try harder and make it so.
I didn't hear what I didn't hear what you were saying.
I was kind of talking about grabbing a snack, like nuts and wrinkly raisins.
And pepperoni.
Kind of a euphemism for balls and
the pepperoni stick.
Yeah, we're trying to keep it clean, though.
Sorry about that.
Because sometimes on a road trip, you grab snacks.
Maybe like instead of grabbing nuts, it's like
playing around in golf.
Oh.
Because the golf balls are sort of...
Oh.
That's a lot like...
That's a walk.
Yeah.
It's a long walk.
So you don't like it.
Oh, no.
It doesn't work for me.
Austin is saying that to do 18 holes,
it's a long walk.
It's a long walk.
It's a long, wonderful walk.
But you do like it.
I do like it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I don't like to walk, not long.
Yeah.
When Austin says it doesn't work for him,
he's saying that
golfing.
Yes, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
Exactly.
Yeah.
I'm a really positive guy.
So, yeah, most things work for me.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, this all sounds great.
I mean, we sell printers, not dickshoes.com.
You have a place where people can enter their names and a message about why they want it.
That's what's really important.
It's like we didn't know because we made this,
we started a company and we got a bunch of orders, but we didn't know if they were jokes or not.
Yeah.
So we didn't know how to
send the shoes to people.
We did, in fact, get one address.
However, we did not follow through.
We forgot.
We forgot.
Yeah, you guys just weren't prepared for the amount of traffic, I think, that your website got from being on Comedy Bank.
Again, we had no idea there was anybody really.
That's all right.
I mean, but
at this point, though, you do have the printers.
You have access to the printers.
We have access.
We don't quite have them yet, but we can assure you that we'll fall through this time.
Okay, great.
Well, I want everyone to head over there to wesellprinters, not dickshoes.com.
We're going to take a break here.
Kyle and Beck, I know you guys have to go.
Is that right?
Yeah.
You have to go do your own podcast.
We got to go record a couple episodes.
That's fine.
Thank you again, Scott.
Always.
Oh, no problem.
But Austin and Tony, you're going to stick around.
Because when we come back, we're going to have two guests all the way from New York City.
This is exciting.
I'm i'm sorry that you guys i'm so bummed i can't stay yeah too bad but uh let's take a break when we come back we'll have more austin and tony and two guests all the way from new york city we'll be right back with more comedy bang bang after this
your co-workers eating mystery leftovers again but you you respect your lunch break grab a new toasted pizza sandwich from jimmy chohn's yeah toast it try the sicilian salami capicolo ham rich marinara gooey mozzarella and oregano basil all on golden french bread or go cheese mode with the three cheese parmesan provolo and mozzarella dripping with marinara and herbs hot melty seriously satisfying order one fronta jimmy john's new toasted pizza sandwiches oh that's good and participating locations for a limited time while supplies last Discover Terra Madre Americas, one of the world's most exciting food events.
Coming to Northern California for the first time this September 26th through 28th.
Dig into good, clean, and fair food for all with chefs Alice Waters, Sean Sherman, and Jeremiah Tower.
Hear music from The War on Drugs, Spoon, Big Head Todd and the Monsters, Jade Bird, and Passion Pit Solo Acoustics.
Sava the Journey of Terra Madre Americas, only in Sacramento.
Details on Terra MadreUSA.com.
Terra Madre Americas is supported by Sacramento International Airport and brought to you by Slow Food and Visit Sacramento.
ABC Wednesday, Shifting Gears is back.
It has a risen.
Tim Allen and Kat Dennings return in television's number one new comedy.
What?
With a star-studded premiere, including Jenna Elfman, Nancy Travis, and
Hey Buddy!
A big home improvement reunion.
Welcome.
Oh, boy.
That guy's a tool.
Shifting gears, season premiere Wednesday, 8-7 Central on ABC, and stream on Hulu.
Comedy bang bang, we are back.
Austin and Tony, formerly of cooldickshoes.com, now of WeSellPrinters, not dickshoes.com.
And at this point, I mean, I know that we're recording this in advance of releasing it.
It's not a live release, but I can only imagine the orders that are just coming through.
Hopefully, you'll get four orders, right?
That's how many you want?
With a compelling case of why.
Yeah.
Oh, that's right, because people have to write down why they want the printer.
Yeah.
So
if you get more orders than the four, are you going to be sifting through what people write and judging who is going to get it based on merit or?
Yeah, based on merit and like compelling case.
Because here's the thing.
If you can reverse
the customer relationship where they feel like they're on the spot, then they'll be more.
So they're selling the printers to you.
You're buying the printers.
They're pitching to us.
They're pitching to us.
That makes us in charge.
Yeah.
You guys are pros.
Thank you.
You know, I'm so glad we started having entrepreneurs back on the show.
Yeah.
I think it was a good choice.
Yeah.
Well, we have a couple of guests coming up right now.
Have you guys ever been to New York City?
Oh, we did.
We went on, we took Google Glasses and we did a virtual tour of Times Square together.
Yeah, on the Google Glasses?
Yeah.
Google Glasses.
Yeah.
Well, let's talk to them.
They're all the way from New York City.
Please welcome for the first time on the show, the Buggle Brothers.
Wow, so great to be here.
So great to be here, Scott.
Thanks so much for having us on the show.
Oh, no, nice to see you.
Scott, big fan of the podcast.
Actually, this is when I go jogging.
Oh, you do?
Oh, so nice.
It inspires you to work out?
Yeah.
Yeah, no, you just want one of those.
So a really great body, by the way.
Oh, that's actually one of the first time.
That's one of the first times someone said that to me like that.
Wow.
That's like you're really, really nice.
Yeah.
It's incredible.
I've always thought it was actually an incredible shape, sort of like a sort of like an apple or something like that.
And here goes, my brother actually complimented me like he's like the nicest guy ever, all of a sudden.
That was really nice of you.
Yeah, well, I actually never thought about actually commenting on your body until I've scouted right now.
Well, I actually think you actually think you look really great, too.
I know I don't always take the moment to tell you, but you actually really look incredible.
Thanks, brother.
And this is Austin and Tony, by the way.
Hey, Tony.
Hey, Austin.
Hey, Tony.
Hey, I'm Brian Buggle.
I'm Brundon Buggle.
Oh, cool.
Hi, guys.
Brendan.
My brother Brendan.
Brendan.
Brian Brundon.
So, Brendan and Brian Buggle.
Oh, it's Brundon.
It's actually Brundon.
It's Brundon.
Okay, I guess I wrote it down wrong.
Brundon and Brian Bruggle.
Just Buggle.
Buggle.
I beg your pardon.
I'm sorry.
Everything's all jumbled.
Scooby Sword, a tongue-twist to put it on the other side.
It's a B and B a Brungle.
But tell me, you guys are all the way way from New York City.
Yes, absolutely.
We actually came in from New York City.
Do you live there?
You reside there?
We do reside there.
We actually work there.
We work in tourism out in New York City.
Yeah, we do.
Tourism is sort of the lifeblood of the city in a way.
So, you know, it's one of the biggest tourism cities in the whole world.
So, yeah, we just help, we just work in tourism.
When you say you work in tourism, what do you mean?
What exactly?
Oh, well, thanks so much for asking.
That's actually a really good question.
I see why they put you the number one spot.
Yeah, yeah.
McCulsey, right here.
Absolutely.
I don't know what that reference means, but that is very interesting.
We, are you aware of Central Park?
I'm aware of it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So
in fact, I'm so aware of it.
I've been there and I have memories of it.
Oh,
absolutely.
I'm not there currently.
Oh, that makes our life easier.
Yeah, we don't have to explain that it's a big park in the middle of a city, right?
So there's a center.
Pretty much the center of New York City.
Yes.
It's a giant park.
Right in the center of it.
Yeah.
And it's so there are all sorts of things there.
You know, there's big rocks and grass.
I went there for the rocks.
Yeah.
And most people do.
A lot of people do go there for the rocks.
But a nice way to get around Central Park is the
horses.
Are you aware the horse-drawn carriage is?
I have ridden one in.
Oh, so he's
actually.
And this makes our lives easier.
Yeah.
So
explain it for those people and maybe Austin and Tony, have you ever ridden on a horse-drawn carriage?
Just on the Google Glasses.
Oh, yeah.
That was covered in the Google Glasses?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So actually, some people don't notice about the host is that they're not native to Central Park.
That's not their natural habitat.
They're shipped in.
They're shipped in.
They came over on ships?
Yeah, I think they actually came back from way back in the day.
From Winter Mayflower, all that.
Yeah.
Really?
But they're that old?
Right.
Yeah.
Well, you know, they have grandparents and, of course, children.
And grandchildren and so on and so forth.
Yeah, no, these aren't the original ones that travel.
Oh, I see.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, no.
Oh, and
so on.
And I don't want to apologize if I misspoke earlier.
I don't think you misspoke, but
it was definitely
not a disagreement, but a misunderstanding.
Oh, yeah, no, no, these aren't the same ones that came over in the Mayflower.
Okay, thank you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
These are generations after.
Generations.
Generations upon generation.
I mean, the Mayflower came over here in what?
That was old.
That was.
In 1940s or something?
I think that was, yeah, that was before.
That was before black and white TV.
I think so, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so, okay, so I don't know about the horses, right?
Okay.
And so there are other animals in the park that are native to the park, and they live there, and it's all good.
There's nothing nothing needs to be done, they can live there.
But with the horses,
the horses have a very specific way of living, I would say, sort of physiologically.
If you're not aware, the horses are much like us, they will eat food,
they're much like humans in that regard.
They do eat food, right?
Absolutely.
And we need to feed them and they break down the food in their bodies with their digestive tracts, right?
And they get all the nutrients they need out of it.
And then
whatever they don't need, they expel.
Exactly.
Exactly.
And now you're making our lives a little bit easier.
That's what I'm here to do.
Because sometimes when we tell people about this, they get really confused and we have to post
a picture or something.
So you make all the graphs.
And I'm going to raise my hand right now.
I'm swearing to God.
You're making my life a lot easier, Scott.
But yes, so as you were saying, so the horses, yeah, and what my brother Brendan was saying earlier, the horses will
churn out this food, and this food, as you say, will become a discharge, if you will.
Some people call it horseshit.
Yes.
That's the indelicate way of saying it.
But they all do it.
In our business, we call call it discharge.
Yes, because this is what our business is.
Essentially, this is our business.
We go around and we collect the horseshit
from the horses out in Central Park.
Because if we did it, it would actually be a huge problem, and all the tourists would be stepping in it, and they wouldn't come to New York City anymore.
And the horses, we can't get rid of the horses because they came over here in the 40s a long time ago.
And people enjoy the rides.
And, you know, as right now, and just to just to be fully
transparent to be fully making my life.
Well, like one woman's plane.
I have a friend who is in the movie Superman.
Oh,
wow.
I want to see that.
And so he probably knows about Wonder Woman's Plane.
Yeah, I've not been able to see him.
I've not been able to see a movie.
I wish he was here and could have heard me say that.
He would have given me a high five.
And we do love high fives, too.
We always are high fiving each other, so that's a really amazing thing.
Can I see you try to do one?
Oh, absolutely.
There you go.
Oh,
that was.
Okay, first of all, you're just holding hands, and it was really low.
That was like ankle level.
It was a bit of a mistake.
And
if I had another opportunity, I actually really think I could.
You want a second crack at it?
Yeah, second, second, second, second, crack.
There we go.
Now one hand is on top of the other, and you're sort of making like a shadow puppet of a fish.
And a fish.
Right.
And that is a common accurate description.
Yeah, but it's a common misconception because it's just our hands.
It's not a fish.
Okay.
It's very common.
I would love to,
if you get the moment, or if you get the chance later, I would love for you to sort of just give a sense of the proper way to do the high five.
Okay, we can do a tutorial after this.
Oh, actually,
that'll make my life.
Stick around after the show.
Make my life a lot easier.
So, actually, the thing is, so yeah, we are actually in charge of collecting all this shit.
So, there's only a few ways around this problem of all the horse shit in Central Park.
You could get rid of the horses, but people enjoy the rides too much, and the horses came over from the Moonlight.
Right, they were here before any of us.
You guys have to deal with it in the Google Glasses, too.
Oh, you see, do you catch it on the Google glasses?
Yeah, it might be the Google glasses.
We see guys,
Yeah,
actually, I was thinking maybe I should start calling them doo-doo glasses.
That would be actually a really good idea.
I don't know if they'd sell as many units.
We'll keep it at Google Glasses.
People do have a negative connotation with doo-doo and horseshit, which is kind of frustrating for us because we work in the industry.
But that's the only reason you have a job because if there wasn't this negative connotation,
something we actually have to clarify you on.
This is currently volunteer work.
And we show up because we knew that there was a job that needed to be done and nobody was doing it.
Okay.
And so we were hearing all the tourists.
Why do you think no one was doing it?
Were you walking through Central?
We're not sure because we're seeing these things around.
This huge
turbo.
Grab that one.
Grab that.
I'm getting interested.
What's that one going to feel like?
Why is that one a little more bubbly than the other one?
Yeah.
So, yeah, we're collecting them.
Collecting them.
Yeah.
At first, we were just fans.
What did you say?
At first, we were just fans.
And now then you became collectors.
Yes, yes, and we're like, oh, we actually helped.
And you know, we actually, I remember that, I remember the very first time when one of the horse ride, when one of the
guys,
he was the pilot
of the buggy, the horse pilot.
In the business, it's called a horse pilot or a buggy pilot.
Oh, a buggy pilot.
Okay.
He was like, oh, thanks for grabbing that.
We're like, oh, wow.
I guess we're actually doing something good here.
He turned around and said over his shoulder, hey, thanks for grabbing that.
Yeah, nice guy.
Really nice, oldie gentleman, really nice guy and we that's what it that's when it clicked for us yeah we i guess we have a job to do yeah so we've missed we've spent the last
16 17 years 16 17 years just on a volunteer basis and we grabbed we grabbed we grabbed the shit we bring it back to our home wrap it up and we make it because it comes sometimes depending on what the horse says it can be kind of like clay you can make a little thing with it you can you can give it away in the streets too i like to make because i've actually been making little tiny figurines and i love to give these little kitties around our apartment building yeah and i've been making bowls and plates and stuff out of it and like we use them to know
you can use it to eat porridge or soup or whatever whatever you put in a bowl i don't know that i would necessarily want to eat out of a horseshit bowl oh it's sanitized oh we walk away we wash them soap water soap of water and hose
hose water yeah hose water i don't know whether that's entirely sanitized oh
well i don't know because actually our apartment building is next to a restaurant okay so that's how we have access to you piqued my interest so yeah, this restaurant, I believe it's more sort of French fare.
Yeah, it's French fare.
And they serve people.
French fusion, maybe?
Yeah, French fusion.
I think maybe something like that.
Yeah, something like that.
Maybe in New York City.
Because it costs something yin-yang.
Yeah.
Sure.
But no, they serve the people to water there.
And so we use the same water to clean our shit with.
And then we, you know, scope that into bowls.
Okay, I still don't think it's sanitary.
Even though you're using restaurant water.
Well, you know, that's a he said, she said scenario.
I think it's just fun.
Now, are you guys charging for the bowls?
no this is something we would really and actually it's really interesting to be talking to you guys because i noticed that you saw more business types which is really fascinating yeah was it my walk yeah exactly yeah we saw it the way you were with your uh the the crotch was forward no shit i reverted we would we would love to we would love to start making some money because um it is it is a tough uh it's a tough life being people who just sort of collect the horse shit and yeah and do sort of um interesting stuff with the horse shit there's a lot of misconceptions around it what are the misconceptions because people think it's not think it's something that we just do for ourselves and that we liked it or that it's dirty or stinky or it's nasty.
Okay, so which of those are misconceptions?
Well, it's just that
those are actually misconceptions, but the misconception is that all that stuff is bad.
Oh, okay.
There's a negative connotation.
We're actually helping the city.
Not all heroes wear capes.
Like Superman.
Exactly.
I wish my friend was here for you.
You're friends with Superman.
Well, I'm not friends with Superman.
I'm friends with Steve Lombard.
Oh, he's the guy from Daily Planet.
Breakout character from Superman.
Oh, I've actually heard about him.
He's a big mustache kind of guy.
A huge mustache.
I will stick around to meet him after.
I'll stick around after the meeting.
Well, no, he left already.
Oh,
we have that high-five workshop.
Well, yeah, you have the high-five tutorial
wrapping for a while after this.
Okay,
you're not going to be able to meet him.
But okay, so now,
how do you survive
uh
living in New York City?
It's expensive.
It's really expensive.
That's mostly just from uh well, we have, I should, I should clarify the French restaurants down below.
So you're above the French, right?
Because you said you were next to it.
Yeah, we have, we live in a really small studio apartment together.
Um, so basically, how many square feet?
Do you know what square feet are?
Those feet are kind of long, so it's it can be confusing.
Square feet?
I think it's about yeah, uh, it's about cigarette-shaped.
Yeah, I think it's like two poops.
It's about, yeah,
Well, we could, we fit.
I feel like we already have about, I'm thinking about how much dung we have in there.
That's probably at least because you've been doing this 16, 17 years and you saved every single one.
Six, seven hundred, like, that's the stuff that we keep.
This is the stuff that we keep.
We don't have an archive situation.
I would imagine when you first started, you kept everything, and then suddenly you're
making decisions which aren't.
Yeah, you don't want to be a hoarder.
Sure.
You don't want, it's like, this is too much shit in this little studio apartment.
We can't fit in.
Now you only have six or seven hundred shits.
But yeah, to answer your question, yeah,
the place is rent-controlled, and actually, our father has done pretty well for himself.
You farted what?
No, our father.
Yeah, no, no.
I know that sounds sense because we collect the horse shit, but no, my father.
My father.
Our father.
Our father has done pretty well for himself.
Oh, really?
That's a really interesting question that you asked now.
What is his story?
Making our lives a lot easier.
Well, we're continuing his line of work, actually.
Yeah, what does he do?
A little bit.
What did he do?
You know Rolling Stones?
The Rolling Stones, the bands?
Nick Jagger, Keith.
Keith Richards.
Keith.
Especially back.
Yeah, so exactly Keith.
So
back in their party days,
when they were partying a lot, they would get really nasty.
They'd get nasty.
Yeah.
What does that mean?
They were taking shits in hotel rooms everywhere.
Everyone does that.
I mean, I think every time I've ever rented a hotel room, I've taken at least one shit in a hotel.
So you'd get to hear it.
Yeah, it's not weird.
So
often nasty or weird, and it happens.
Sometimes they'd clog the toilet, though.
They'd miss the toilet, go right on the floor of the coffee table or something like that.
And that's where Ethan Buggle
would come in handy.
That's our father.
He was paid to collect the shit of the Roy Zones.
Just them?
Or everyone?
Oh, just the Burlington Snow.
You know, if they...
And they're crew.
And also, I think he was actually paid not, just to get rid of the shit, but he ended up collecting it.
Okay.
And he has shits of McJagger.
Okay.
And shits of Keith.
Okay.
So he's some other guy from the band.
Charlie Watts, maybe?
Yeah.
I believe Charlie Watts, yeah.
His ones were the widest ones.
Wide, really.
Well,
they kind of pull out.
Well, he's sitting down when they play.
Right, because he played the drum skit.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We actually, I have one, we have one of Charlie Watts'
sort of flattened out shits right above our right above our bed.
It's framed, and it's actually
signed by our dad.
Yeah.
So cool.
It's so cool.
He did really well for himself.
Exactly.
So you're thinking as like life is good.
What's the problem?
Yeah.
Oh, now.
Yes.
This is why we're actually here.
I felt like there couldn't possibly be more to the story, but
you've come for a purpose.
Yes, we have.
Okay, and it's actually hard to talk about.
It is actually very hard to talk about.
You know, especially being in a a city like new york city where it's a big city it's a big city a lot of beautiful people a lot of beautiful people
unfortunately we have found ourselves in a situation
where a person like myself a person like brendan my person like my brother brandon brandon person like my brother brandon we have not been able to find our other halves we've not been able to find our
significant other your perfect match your person and we've been on the dating apps okay which ones we've been on tindo buggle
There's a buggle.
Which date?
Use
a bumble.
Because I think your last name is Buggle.
I think so too.
We wish.
I think your first name is Brundon.
I would know.
By the way, I would not date another family member for what it's worth.
I would not date another family member.
No, I would not date one.
Not a public.
Why did you stress the word date?
Because
if you have a hookup or something like that, it's just casual.
A mild hookup.
A mild hookup.
Just on the not a home run or anything like that.
On the DL.
And the DL, yeah.
Just sort of.
I would never date a family member, by the way.
Absolutely.
Okay, all right.
So that makes sense.
And I'm sorry.
I'm waiting my hand right now.
High as heck right now.
And my hands are down, but it's all good.
We've been on the dating apps, and it seems as if there's sort of a situation where, you know, persons who work in our industry.
Yeah.
I don't know anyone, by the way, who works in your industry.
And I think that's
part of the problem.
Usually I think it's a clean up your own kind of thing.
And, you know, and we've been wondering about it, yeah, because
we go on these apps and we're like, oh, you know, we pick up the shit after the horses and stuff.
And we don't get paid to do it.
It's volunteer work, but there's no organization.
There's a lot of misconceptions.
That's right.
That's bad, but it's actually good.
A lot of people were sending messages to you.
Like, oh, I haven't heard of that.
Nobody does that.
It sounds like.
They're sending messages to you.
Oh, yeah.
No, we've talked.
They were just
great.
No, no, no, no, yeah.
No, no, no, we've upgraded.
They're like, why the hell do you look like that in your photo?
I'm like, somebody's interested.
And we start talking.
Wait, so in your photo, you have shit all over you?
Exactly.
Okay.
You got to take better pictures first of all.
I will.
Well, now you'll get out of this.
This is somebody that we don't know.
I mean, like, we only give you advice to each other.
We don't know.
We don't really know other people besides our father who, you know, we have to do it.
He's still the same line of work.
Is he still with us?
He, no, he actually
really sad story.
He was actually helping us out one day collecting the shit from the horse out in Central Park.
How massive.
He got swallowed by the horse.
The horse's boss.
Swallowed?
Well, he was searching in the FSMX, and suddenly a horse backed up and just
swallowed him.
He got totally, totally swallowed.
Peace, King.
Because Cosette put us in a lot of trouble with, because we had to talk to the buggy pilot.
You mind if we check and see if our dad's okay?
Finally got, was able to sit so hard.
Finally got the A-okay.
They okay to Switzerland horse.
Search the horse dad wasn't alive no more.
Oh, man.
Yeah, he was all churned up.
It's actually kind of beautiful in a way because he kind of became the thing that he always was about and picking up shit.
He kind of became shit.
I call it a circle of life.
Yeah, yeah.
But But anyway, yeah, so yeah, we've been, so yeah, we sort of give each other advice on what sort of pictures we should take from our dating profile.
Okay.
And that is actually good advice.
Maybe we do maybe take a new photo where we're not wearing our shit gear.
By the way, you should take individual photos because it sounds like you're taking just one collective photo.
Exactly.
That also works, though.
That works with
a lot of people.
Yeah.
You can take one with your bro and people will be like, whoa, that guy has friends.
Exactly.
So in theory, it could be working.
Yeah, it could be.
But it seems to not be working for you.
Absolutely not.
Okay.
And so I was actually thinking, well,
maybe we need maybe the problem is the dating profile.
Not the profile, but the dating profile.
An app, the application.
So what we want to do is we want to get rid of this app.
Is that what you're saying?
I'm wondering, like, oh, maybe it's sort of an app dedicated to our community.
I see.
Something maybe called Buggle?
That is actually a pretty good idea.
And it's like Bumble, but it's Buggle, and it's for people who collect shit and who pick up shit for jobs.
Those who are interested in that.
Yes, and who are okay with that.
And the people who are okay okay with the
reorganizing and changing, rebranding the stigma around shit.
Okay.
And it's like, it's part of our life.
It's as Kai.
As who?
As Kai.
He calls me Kai Kai.
What?
Because
I like to fly my Kai Kai around a park.
Oh, okay.
Oh, okay.
While you're picking up the shit?
Oh, no, sir.
Picking up the shit.
Sounds like a two-year-old.
We always say
find the Kaikai
after work.
You fly to Kai Kai when it's the right time time.
And it's not the right right time time
when you pick up the horseshoe.
These are words to live by.
Yeah.
So, yeah, I actually forget what I was saying.
Yeah, but maybe this app could work out.
And you're starting this app.
Is that?
It was just an idea because I heard you had a podcast.
I would listen when I've been jogging.
I was like, oh, maybe that's something we could get talking about.
Yeah.
Maybe if we put out the word and then we could find somebody, some entrepreneur or something like that.
Well,
I never entrepreneur.
We can be your entrepreneurs.
Yeah, you're like, wait, if you're looking.
Hold on one second.
Yeah, hang on.
We got like two successful businesses.
That's successful.
One was too successful where they couldn't keep up with supply and demand.
Yeah.
Dude, this is actually so difficult.
You guys have made websites before?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We made two total.
Have you worked with people in the horseshit picking up industry?
Make a sense.
Yeah.
We pick up our dogs' shit.
Oh, that's pretty much the same thing.
It's just a different animal.
Yeah, yeah.
Sometimes different size of the shit.
Yeah, of course.
Let me look up buggle.com.
Unfortunately, that...
Oh, it's available for sale.
Oh, okay.
But I.
How much are they asking?
It says get a price in less than 24 hours.
Unless it's...
That's not a good thing.
Unless it's 23 and 59 minutes.
We need it now.
We need it now.
Yeah, we need it now before.
That's not going to work for us.
Yeah.
Maybe you should come up with a more unique website name like
Buggle Brothers.
Buggle Brothers
Dane site.
Buggle Brothers, not dickshoes.com.
Not dick shoes.
Yeah.com.
Okay.
Yeah.
Maybe that would work.
Buggle Brothers, not dickshoes.com, and then we'll put
either two pictures or one of the both of you.
Not covered in shit.
Not covered.
Not covered in shit.
We have to take one for the team for this one.
Take advice of Scott.
I asked you a question.
Ask you a question.
Asking one single question.
Okay.
One question.
Asking one single question.
The photo of us without shit on us.
The photo of
the question?
No, well, there's another shit.
I'm asking about the question.
There's a preface for the question.
Okay.
Just to clarify, one photo with us without shit on it, right?
That's the question you want to ask?
No, that's not the question.
But is that my right so far?
You are correct so far.
My next question: is it okay if we have another photo of, say, one of our special bowls or
figurines or something like that?
Sure.
I'll give you one bowl.
Thank God.
One picture of one bowl.
Okay, so I'm imagining this.
I mean, you guys are
what you're going to want is a main page.
A landing page.
I've heard about these.
Yeah.
I know what these are.
Yeah, like a page where you put what you have, and then you want
another tab that says about me.
And then you don't need anything else.
Yeah.
Well, we could tell all about us because we live in New York City.
We work out of Central Park, mostly volunteers.
We've heard your story.
Oh, right.
With the Buckle Brothers.
I'm Brian Buggle.
This is all Brandon.
This has all been well covered.
Our father actually worked in a similar internet.
No, we heard 100% of these details.
Okay, well, you're talking.
Oh, I thought you were saying,
I want to hear all this.
No, no, no, no, no.
We've heard all of this at this point.
Bustin and Tony, do you think you can work on this website for the Buggle Brothers?
This is.
Wait, yeah.
Sorry.
I was going to say this is epic.
Oh, no, what you were going to say.
I was going to say this is epic, too.
What's your price for doing this?
Party bus.
Yeah, well, if you buy the party bus, we will make the website.
If they just rent one for one night, prom night?
Yeah.
But what if we made you one?
Out of our bus.
Yeah, that's even better.
Out of the bounty.
Because I have been doing experiments with making wheels.
Okay.
We have the perfect thing to make your bus out of.
I know exactly what you're finding.
Do you think you can make a CD player and a stripper pole?
Yeah, we need to do it.
We'll definitely make a stripper pole.
I've done that before.
You have?
We can make a CD player, too.
You can put a CD in there, but I don't know if it's actually anywhere.
That's fine.
That's totally fine.
Yeah, that's just mostly a prop till
CDN.
Yeah, and it's okay.
It's all horse shit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, dude, we'll do what we can take, bro.
I mean, seriously,
we'll do what we can take.
We'll do what we can take, bro.
That's what we say, too.
We'll get sold on it right away because we'll get it.
Because, of course, got the hoes, got the French restaurant right by us.
Yep, we'll get sold right away.
You got to do that.
And then we get the dating website, and we're going to find a perfect match.
This is great.
Well, maybe you guys could, by the time this episode goes live, maybe you could make this website.
Yeah,
and then maybe we'll find a date.
Actually, is it maybe it's for adults?
I don't know.
Well, I think it's for people that pick up horseshit.
Tell you what, I think this website kids can be on this side too.
Why don't we love it?
Why don't we make a different website?
Buggle Brothers, not Dick ShoesJr.com.
That's the kids to find love.
Yeah, I really like that idea, and I think you're helping the world too.
Yeah, that's very perfect.
This is fantastic.
I love it when something comes together like this.
But we are running out of time, unfortunately.
Oh, no.
Yeah, I know.
I just got in a a good mood because I found out I'm getting party bus.
Yeah, unfortunately, we're running out of time.
We only have time for one final feature, and that is, of course, a little something called plugs.
Plug
bag.
All right, that was fantastic.
That was Blue Moon, but instead of Blue Moon, it says Plug Bag by Chris Finky.
Thanks so much to Chris Finky.
I've heard your songs before.
Thanks so much, Chris.
If you have something, a plug theme you want to submit, head over to cbbworld.com/slash plugs.
You'll find everything you need over there.
And
what are we plugging?
Let's first go to, I guess, the Buggle Brothers.
What do you, what do you, what do you want to plug here?
Just new and interesting ways of working with horseshit.
Yeah.
Just, I actually would like, if we haven't made it yet, I would like to plug the
horseshit party bus that we're about to make.
Okay, great.
Yeah.
And I'd like to plug it in and make sure it works.
And Brian, you listen to podcasts while you go jogging, it sounds like.
Is there a new podcast that you've heard that you
there is one who I've been hearing a lot about.
Yes.
I haven't listened yet because
I'm exclusive to Columbia Bang Bang.
You're exclusive.
So you're not going to listen to it.
I won't ever listen to it, but I believe it's called What's Hot Podcast with
Bick Bennett and Kevin Klein, I believe.
That's great.
Oh, yeah, I've heard of it.
I've heard you, I've heard you talk about that.
Yeah, yeah, that you're not going to listen to it because you're exclusive to Comedy Bang.
Absolutely, yeah.
I'll tell them podcasts I'm aware of that I'm never going to listen to.
Good, good, yeah.
But yeah, check it out.
There's two episodes from what I hear.
One has Frank Gillespie, who is a writer on SNL.
Yeah, yeah, wow, and who was spotted at the SNL 50, I think.
SNL, they actually do.
We've actually picked up some of the shit from some of the SNL castle members before.
Absolutely, back in the day.
Yeah, like Eggowodom, Heidi Grano,
Eddie Bryant, and
I think there's the only people who picked up that shit.
Yeah, only
those are cast members.
Those are big names.
But
do you still have those, or did you throw those away?
Oh, we have them, yeah.
You still have them.
That's like a little glass cage, sort of a thing.
Glass cage.
So it's not a glass box, but it's a cage.
It's like those whole thing.
I was never comfortable with a glass case.
I was like, that's just inhumane.
Let's put some holes in it.
You simply make
Fantastic.
And
that's great.
And two episodes are out right now.
And Austin and Tony, what do you want to plug?
First and foremost, Fran Gillespie.
She's just an amazing woman.
Secondly,
we like these girls' podcasts called Ana and Isabella Do Improv.
They do a little improv podcast.
Oh, that's, yeah, you were talking about that last time you were on the show, weren't you?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And
what's it like?
What do they do?
They do different improv forms every week.
And you don't really have to listen to or like no improv to get it.
Yeah.
That's a big goal of theirs.
Yeah.
I don't know if they're always hitting that mark, but it's certainly a goal.
Great.
Well, that's fantastic.
And how many episodes do they have?
20-something.
20-something.
Hey, look out, Times, Top 100 podcasts.
Here we come.
That's fantastic.
All right.
Well, what do I want to plug?
Hey, we announced this last week.
We have new action figures, new comedy bang Bang action figures.
We have,
of course, the Entre P Neur and Italiano Jones action figures.
And
let me see if I can find the information about that because that would be good, right?
If I could remember how to order these.
Unfortunately, I can't find it.
Whoa, wait.
No, here we go.
Coming this September, these are shipping now.
The new Comedy Bang Bang 3.75-inch action figures by FC Toys, Entre P.
Neur and Italiano Jones.
Now available for pre-order at figurecollections.com.
Okay, Series 2, we have Entre P.
Neur and Italiano Jones.
Plus, coming soon, we have Reggie Watts, Forval, The Little Orphan Boy, Dalton Wilcox, and Jason Manzoukis.
We also still have a few left of Randy Snutz and Carissa, Big Sue, Spreg the Whisperer, J.W.
Stillwater, and Scott Auckerman.
They are available for customers worldwide at figurecollections.com with free shipping with a U.S.
address or in Europe with cheaper import fees at action figureseller.com.
All right, let's close up the old plugback.
All right, that was close 2025 Close the Plug Bag by theme by Alec Levy.
Okay,
thank you, Alec Levy.
And guys, I want to thank you so much.
First of all, Austin and Tony, wonderful to have you back.
Good luck with the website that you made.
Your new business with the printers.
I'm not in the market for one, unfortunately.
i'm so sorry but um good luck with that and then good luck with uh your new two new websites of course we have buggle brothers not dick shoes.com and buggle brothers not dick shoes junior.com yeah good luck with these thank you thanks thanks for having us yeah thanks for having us and are you okay what's you guys seem depressed suddenly no you're not getting a printer you're not getting one well still you can we were we needed to get the twelve thousand dollar one oh no please no i don't think i i i don't think i can especially let's beg Let's just get on your knees, dude.
It's just time.
No, no, you guys are just supposed to get on your knees.
No, you got to get on your knees.
You got to get on your knees.
No, I'm not going to get on my knees.
I'm facing the relationship.
Get down on your knees.
Get down.
Hey, all right, here.
Please, please give me this printer.
Okay, you can have one.
Yeah.
Okay.
I'll take the 40.
Aw.
And, hey, Brian and Brundon.
Yeah.
Hey, you and Dave, Scott.
Yeah, what's up?
It's nice to be here.
Thanks for having us.
Oh, no.
No, the show's a.
Oh,
I'm so sorry.
We already talked to you about it.
He actually doesn't really listen to podcasts.
Yeah, because I try to keep my ears clean.
I don't listen to any podcasts anymore.
That's right.
That's right.
Thanks so much for being on, and good luck to you.
Thank you so much.
We actually really do need it.
Yeah.
And you better start working on that party bus.
This is a big problem.
I got a lot of ideas to ask you guys.
What are the ideas?
Sort of putting the wheels together with the engine.
Sort of like a roof.
Yeah.
And then the sides.
You'll definitely need chairs.
And floor.
I want to do sort of a classic style, like,
you know, sort of parking break situation.
You know, those doors with the
hand.
That's going to be tough to make.
That's going to be a really thin rod of horseshoe shit.
That's going to have to be some.
You're going to have to find a really thin horseshoe.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We've got it.
Yeah, we've got it.
Okay, great.
All right.
Well, we'll see you next time, thanks.
Bye.
Hello, everybody.
It's me, Italiano Jones, the tallest man in Italy, and I will fight for you.
But right now, I don't need to fight for you.
I need you to buy something for me.
That's right.
Coming in September, two new Comedy Bang Bang 3.75 inches action figures by FC Toys, Andre P.
Newer and Italiano Jones.
First appearing together in CBB episode number 634.
Now available as action figures at figurescollections.com.
That's that's figurecollections.com figures will be shipping in September and you can pre-order now also in stock Randy Snuts and Carissa Big Sue Sprague the Whisperer JW Stillwater and Scott Auckerman no Scott Scott no
available for customers worldwide at figurecollections.com with free shipping with the US address or in Europe like Italy with cheaper import fees at action figureseller.com.
Europe got a different website So make sure you hear me again say that again, actionfigureseller.com.
Bye.
Your coworker's eating mystery leftovers.
Again, but you, you respect your lunch break.
Grab a new toasted pizza sandwich from Jimmy John's.
Yeah, toast it.
Try the Sicilian salami, capicolo, ham, rich marinara, gooey mozzarella, and oregano basil, all on golden French bread.
Or go cheese mode with the three cheese, parmesan, provolo, and mozzarella, dripping with marinara and herbs.
Hot, melty, seriously satisfying.
Order one, Fronto, Jimmy John's new toasted pizza sandwiches.
Oh, that's good.
At participating locations for a limited time while supplies last.
Discover Terra Madre Americas, one of the world's most exciting food events.
Coming to Northern California for the first time this September 26th through 28th.
Dig into good, clean, and fair food for all with chefs Alice Water, Sean Sherman, and Jeremiah Tower.
Hear music from The War on Drugs, Spoon, Big Head Todd and the Monsters, Jade Bird, and Passion Pit Solo Acoustics.
Save our the journey of Terra Madre Americas, only in Sacramento.
Details on Terra Madreusa.com.
Terra Madre Americas is supported by Sacramento International Airport and brought to you by Slow Food and Visit Sacramento.
Did you know you can get 25 cents off per gallon on your next five visits when you download the Chevron app and join Chevron Rewards?
Head to your nearest Chevron station now to fuel up and get rewarded.
Terms apply.
See ChevronTexcoRewards.com for more details.