Group Soup (Asif Ali, Lily Sullivan, Tim Baltz, Greg Hess)
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Transcript
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At the University of Arizona, we believe that everyone is born with wonder.
That thing that says, I will not accept this world that is.
While it drives us to create what could be,
that world can't wait to see what you'll do.
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Here is my handle.
Here is my snout.
Wait, that's not a teacup.
It's a feral rat.
Oh, no, it bit me and I'm dying.
But I was the rat?
Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang.
I mean.
Thanks to teacuprat69.420.com for that catchphrase submission.
That was submitted in January of 2023.
So thanks.
I'm just getting around to it.
Thank you so much.
Hope you appreciate it.
And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week.
We have a very exciting show.
Coming up a little later, we have a
couple of people.
I can't remember what they do.
And we also have a singer coming up a little later on the show.
So that's very exciting.
But first, before we get to that, let me give you a little background about what we're doing today.
Oh, no.
It was March of the year 2025.
God damn it.
The citizens of Los Angeles, still reeling from the Southern California wildfires that had ravaged the state, were tentatively attempting to get back into their normal daily routines.
And that included one young comedian whose television program had premiered at the beginning of the month.
Its name was Deli Boys.
It's no small feat for a young comedian to appear on the Comedy Bang Bang podcast.
It was usually the result of years of putting in one's dues.
First open mics, then moving from opening sets to middling.
Finally, after one achieved headlining status, the call of Hollywood beckons.
And if one was lucky, there might be a dropout of the scheduled A-block guest on this comedy institution.
And a comedian could finally get their foot in the door.
And that is what happened that day.
But then during the show, something astounding occurred.
It was an enjoyable 90 minutes.
And in the middle of that, a promise was made from the comedian to the host, an unshakable pledge that the listeners would cling to during this difficult year, giving them a glimmer of hope in what could so often feel like a year of ever-expanding despair.
But was that promise kept?
The answer might surprise you.
Let's find out together.
Please welcome back to the show and into the Two Timers Club, Asifali.
Aye, aye, aye.
Thank you so much.
And listen, I know the tone of my voice makes it sound like I'm not taking this seriously, but I do want to formally apologize.
Before we get to that, let's talk about
what the promise was.
I do want to hear this apology, but before we get to that, is an apology even necessary?
Let's talk about what was said.
Yes, so we were in the middle of recording.
You, by the way, are one of the stars of this show.
I'm number one in the call shape, guys.
You're number one.
That's right.
We are number one.
It's called Deli Boys.
It's on FX on Hulu.
It's on Hulu.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
And so we were here.
It's a charming show about two
as you've written down.
There's no other way to say it, but Deli Boys.
Yeah, two Deli Boys.
And as you've written down, two barely legal South Asian boys running.
Yes, I wrote that down right here and I highlighted it.
And again, I don't know why you did that twice.
It seems to be a real sticking point with you.
And they take over their father's
empire when he dies.
We find out that our father was actually running the mob.
He runs a cocaine smuggling business.
In the town of Chicag.
Philadelphia.
It shoots in Chicago.
What?
Yeah, but it's set in Philadelphia.
Scott, let me explain to you how Hollywood works, okay?
Sometimes you shoot in a city, but it's set in a different city.
And for this reason, I'm out.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
But let me remind you, these young South South Asian boys are dripping in sweat.
Oh, that's right.
Okay, okay, I'm back in.
I'm back in.
These guys are absolutely dripping.
Did we talk about the fact it's set in Philadelphia?
Does M.
Night Shyamalan show up?
And this is another point that I kept bringing up to the writer's room, hence why they don't really like me to hang around anymore, because I will just simply bring in celebrities.
Because he's a security guard
at the stadium, at the Eagles stadium.
Is he not in Breakfast?
He is.
So he could still ostensibly be working there.
And there's one thing about M.
Night Shyamalan: when you see a scene with him in it, you go, this guy should act more.
Yes.
I am not taken out of this reality at all.
I am pushing my chips in, as a matter of fact.
Yeah, this man is definitely not patting himself on the back for what he's doing here.
Or anyone in his family.
Yep.
If you've seen Trent.
And so they said no.
They didn't want M.
Night Shyamalan to be in it, but we put that request out.
And M.
Night, I know, is a huge fan of the pod.
Yep.
And I would just love it.
We joke around on this pod at night.
We know you're listening.
And
you think it's funny, and that's why we're ribbing.
And the M stands for, mm.
It's hard to convey waggling of eyebrows on a podcast, but I think we did it.
He's a real tasty man.
And so we just want to put that out there.
M-Night, if you really want to be on the show, just please.
Make these guys an offer.
Make us an offer.
We will accept, regardless of what it is.
Whatever the terms are.
Whatever the terms are.
We'll let you direct one if you want.
Oh, boy.
Wow.
Come on.
Whatever you want.
We just need it you know in this age of hollywood we need all the sort of clickbait star power we can get which is why i'm here yeah which is why i'm here which is why you're here we discussed this show at length i had watched i believe when that we recorded the show i had watched two or three episodes is that right i believe so yeah and then i went on to watch the entire season it was it's a very funny show thank you so much uh there there are great comedians on it great actors on it.
I watched the entire thing and we talked a little bit about the fact that I had watched the entire thing when you did my sister show, Scott Hasn't Seen, which watched what Manchester by the Sea.
Manchester by the Sea, which you guys then commented was not a funny movie, which I find to be ridiculous.
Yeah.
And had a lot going on behind the scenes that we enjoyed talking about as well with the actors involved.
So we had a great time on this.
Yeah.
And now let's get back to the content of that first comedy bang bang appearance.
You were on.
This is the first time you've ever been on.
Yeah.
And we were speaking about the show, and I asked you, sort of, you know what?
Why don't we just play the clip?
Is there a season two planned for
there is.
Okay.
There is a season two planned.
There's a season two planned, but has it been picked up for a season two?
No, not yet.
It has not been picked up for a season two.
But here's the thing.
Yes.
If I find out,
you'll be the first to know.
I'll be the first to know.
I'll be the first call you make, even before your family, even before your agent.
Anybody might receive through your agent.
All of my side pieces.
All of your...
Really?
Foster is going to find out second.
I mean, it's not that hard to make a...
And you know what?
You can give me a heads up.
You can text me and say, like, hey, record the call I'm about to make.
Exactly.
Call you and we'll play this on Comedy Bang Bang.
Totally.
Because we're buddies now.
We're buddies.
I feel like we're pretty close.
And I can make a promise like this, and it's not going to like.
It's not going to come back and buy you.
No, not at all.
Because I'm on top of these kinds of things.
And I've known to have a really good memory.
Great.
And, you know, people make promises on this show all the time.
Adam Scott made the promise: if he ever wins the Oscar, he's going to hold it aloft and say, I'm going to shove this up my butt and walk off the stage.
Yes, so now noted he did not make that promise with the Emmy.
Sure, sure.
And we'll talk about that on a future show that'll come out, I believe, in August.
Okay, deal, deal, deal.
Okay,
yeah.
So, yeah, so great.
Let's shake on it.
Let's shake on it.
All right, great.
All right.
What a clip.
That was
visceral.
That was a captivating podcasting.
Yeah, and there was just a connection that we had back then.
Yeah.
That I feel like because of what happened has kind of severed this connection a little bit.
I feel like there's a lack of trust here now.
So let me take you through the chronology
of what has happened since March.
Pretty much daily, I will watch the Diddy trial.
Watch the Diddy trial, pray for him to
get some sort of plea deal.
Scott has been posting posting a lot of like, when's the new music coming out?
This is getting in the way of the new music.
Yeah, yeah.
Did he dirty money too?
Perhaps.
And, but I'll, I'll, pretty much once a day or so, I'll, I'll glance down at this device that I have, uh, Apple makes.
It's an iPhone.
And I'll look at the alerts that pop up.
And these are little messages that get sent directly to my home screen that say if someone's emailed me, if someone's called me, anything like that.
I'll look down at it.
So I was doing this pretty much once a day since March.
Oh, my God.
And,
you know, just wondering, I hope these guys go to season two.
I really like this show.
Yeah.
I like Osif.
Let's see what's going on.
Nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing.
Pretty much every day this would happen.
And then, but you didn't lose hope.
And that's what we love about you.
I didn't lose hope.
No, I was like, I'm his first call.
We're buddies.
You heard that clip, of course.
Yeah, that clip was, it couldn't be more clear.
Yeah.
And then
not two days ago,
there's nothing on my home screen.
So I go,
I'm just going to swipe this thing up.
I'm going to surf the net.
And you turned off the notifications for your wife.
Yes, exactly.
Because you want to keep your wife.
I didn't want her to
really know what was going on in my personal life.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
My personal life is personal.
Right, right, right.
Of course, of course, of course.
So I surfed the net a little bit and I went on some of my favorite websites, google.com,
and I looked up Deli Boys season two.
And yeah, and you did that.
You did this early in the morning.
Yeah.
First thing, right when you woke up, your wife was like, Good morning.
You were like, stop.
I'm in the middle of something.
I'm in the middle of something right now.
And you turned over and you're kicking your legs.
You're kicking your legs.
I was on my stomach.
I was kicking my legs.
It was a lot like I was in a 60s, like, you know, beach party movie or something.
Yeah.
And I had a beach ball that I was bouncing on my head.
And
what I came upon just hit me like a thunderbolt.
Yeah.
Because I found found an article on, I believe it was variety.com.
Variety Deadline, Hollywood Reporter.
We don't have it.
I think it was Variety because it was like
the headline was, Deli Boys is not ankled.
And I was like, I didn't know what that meant.
So I had to look up Variety Lingo and Ankled means canceled.
After season one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And in fact, it was picked up for season two.
And Fred Armison is in the cast of season two.
And I said, okay, Asup doesn't know about this.
Obviously, I pray that he does not log on to the internet today to find out this news.
Yes.
So I waited a good 48 hours saying, like, at some point, someone will tell him about it and he'll call me.
The call never came.
The call never came.
And I'm here to, to, again, to, to, to, and, and we can.
I, in fact, had to reach out to you.
You did reach out to me.
And,
you know, even though we're trying to resolve this right now,
real Hollywood move for people listening do not respond.
And you're saying you should not have responded to me.
I should not have responded to you, just to let it sit a little bit more.
You got back to me with, let me check the stats.
of exactly when you got back to me after um because i emailed me in the afternoon i looked at it the amount of shame that washed over me was
i reached out to you at 5 21 p.m which i guess is the afternoon and that's usually when i'm hanging out with my first side piece so i was we start early in the evening.
Okay, now this, it's respectable, but I would have liked a little more
8.56 p.m.
is when you responded.
I would have liked it a little more in the 6 p.m.
range between 6 and 7.
But you wrote back to me and said, I need to clear this up on the pod.
Yes.
They surprised me too.
Yeah.
I can't have this destroy my pristine image and reputation.
I'm available whenever you are.
And I do have a really good reputation in this city.
You've, you've, you've seen the Google.
And on this podcast as well.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And people really, you know.
People took a shine to you.
Did they?
They really did.
They said, well, what a great one-timer.
He really gets the show.
Yeah.
And they said, I hope he comes back and enters the two-timer club, even though that will be bad for his career.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It didn't really affect my follower account
on any of the socials.
So I don't know what your fan base
is anymore.
I don't know.
But
they really enjoyed you, and as did I.
And I can't help but feel like this is a bit of a betrayal.
Yeah, you feel like some of my side pieces where it seems like it's going great, and then you find out, oh, was this, was he just here?
He's got a second family?
Exactly.
And I'm here to say it did, it was a surprise.
In what way was it a surprise?
In that they gave us an extension on the show.
They should have told us like two months ago, two, three months ago.
So, so the contract was due to run out two or three months ago.
Yeah.
And then
they gave an extension of how many months?
Of like two months.
And they're like, well, we don't know yet.
So, and I had a whole party set up.
You had a party set up on the, on the day the contract was going to end?
Yes.
This is bad planning.
There was a whole Dave and Busters thing.
And I was going to come out.
And I had like token cards for everybody.
And I had to put out the Facebook event cancellation.
And it was really embarrassing for me.
And so,
and so, because I have a reputation in this town.
And so I had to then explain to these people what an extension was.
Did you keep the token cards?
I did keep keep the token cards, and I don't want to get into it.
I don't want to get into how much money is loaded on there.
Okay, but let's just say that you can go to Dave and Buster's pretty much anytime you want and sit pretty.
I can sit pretty, but the problem is Dave and Buster's per policy will not refund you that money.
Once it's on the card.
Once it's on the card, you can't get it back.
You cannot get it back.
But Dave and Buster's for life.
That's true.
Dave and Buster's for life after dark.
And
so I found out about this extension and I was devastated.
I had a whole like hot boy summer was just starting.
Sure.
And I really had like a whole plan for myself for the summer.
And one of the things was letting you know about this, but it really did just.
So you're at Dave and Buster's.
You're waiting for the call from your agent, I think.
Yes.
To be like, hey, to be on FaceTime and be like, hey, guys.
Cause you know, when something good happens,
everybody calls.
Yes, everybody calls.
But you would have.
You're at Dave and Buster's.
You're waiting for the call from your agent.
And then I was going to be the first call before the party.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Yeah.
You were going to be the in-between.
Okay.
And now I'm not invited to the party.
And
I'm assuming.
And here's the thing, Scott.
Here's the thing, Scott.
I know that you're like really busy.
Oh, yeah.
You know, I forgot about that.
People don't know this about Scott, but he's doing all the technical for this podcast.
Yeah.
People assume you have this huge team and all that, but you laid them off the first chance you could get.
Oh, yeah.
The minute I learned how to press record on this machine.
The moment you learned that AI.
He's a bricks, guys.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He has a Tesla robot just sitting in the corner in case any sort of task arises.
And so I knew you were going to be busy.
I wanted to invite you, but honestly, I'd only met you once, and I didn't know what kind of nighttime you were.
I met you twice at this point, but go on.
But like, what kind of vibe?
But what kind of like vibe were you?
Were you a nighttime guy?
Are you a nighttime guy?
Quite honestly, I'm not.
You're not a nighttime guy.
So when is this party, though?
This party would start it at like 10, 10:30.
At Dave and Buster's?
Yeah, because it's a nighttime situation.
It was going to get nasty.
Oh, it was going to get nasty.
Oh,
nasty.
Okay, yeah, I don't want to be there.
And so, and so I
i was gonna call you in between and be like hey babe i know it's late but i need you to know this
and and be like hey season two is happening and then you could kind of could have been a voice note too that i could have played on the show like any anything would have been great yeah and but i didn't know how to tell you that we had gotten an extension Okay.
You know, because that felt almost like weird.
Not knowing about the extension or when the contract was due to end, I don't think I would have cared about the extension either.
Right.
I was mainly interested in it getting picked up for the season.
And so knowing that i was like you know what i'm just gonna let it breathe but then that two months a lot of things happened what what's been going on in your in your life i was on a comedy tour um doing what doing stand-up comedy oh okay you weren't you weren't a roadie no no no no no no i was doing straight up you know hardcore hardcore comedy comedy i'm bringing a x-common i'm bringing daddy's bringing it back and you know everyone's talking about what's happening in austin but what's happening with ossif yes You know what I mean?
Yeah.
They think they're edgy.
The things that I'm doing, you can't even imagine.
Yeah, they'll look like choir boys.
Exactly.
The edge is back.
And so I barely legal choir boys.
Barely legal choir boys you wish.
And
so I was just, I did Just for Laughs, a comedy festival.
So I was like, you know, discombobulated a little bit.
I fall in deep fives.
I think it's a fall because it's just for laughs.
It's only for laughs.
Like a lot of festivals are like, hey, we can get some industry.
There's no moderation.
There's no moderation with this festival.
A lot of festivals are like, hey, we'll pay you to do this festival.
This one's just for the luls.
Absolutely just for the haha.
Just for the luls.
Yeah, and did you know that their mascot?
Yeah, they have like that little green.
Yes, he's no longer there.
What's his name?
Vinny or Vincent?
Something like that.
Vincent or something?
The guy who animated him was like a real creep.
I've heard this story, but I don't believe the person who told it to me wanted it said on
a podcast.
Apparently, he was a real creep.
So they took him out of the equation.
Yes.
And I know that disappointed you.
They took him out of the equation.
I was very disappointed.
Yeah, the person who told me was the animator himself.
Yeah.
While I was consoling him.
Yeah.
And yeah.
And that made this hurt twice as much because he told you the moment he got that call.
Yeah.
You were his first person.
And I was there by his side, and that's what I was willing to do with you.
To either be the person who's saying, you know what?
Hey, you'll get another show.
Uh-huh.
Or to be the person celebrating your success along with all of my fans.
That's the thing.
You don't just disappoint me.
Yeah.
You disappoint all of the comedy fans.
Who are rooting for you?
I know.
And for your success.
And do you think that there's any way I can get them back on board?
Because I know you'll be back on board because season two is happening.
There's going to be more South Asian boys than ever.
So I'm in already.
Yeah, you're already in.
But as far as the fans, is there another promise you can offer to the fans that will soothe their souls like a bomb that they need?
I can promise them this.
I can promise them this.
Okay.
The second season is going to be bigger.
And it's going to be.
Okay, don't do that.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
It's going to be bigger.
It's going to be more exciting.
It's going to be more concise because we went down from 10 to 6 episodes.
And I know that doesn't sound good.
And
do you get paid by the episode?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I do get paid by the episode, but I do have a good quote.
And I have a good attorney.
So
I am going to be on the- And you're willing to sue them after the episodes are completely.
Yeah, litigation is very much on the horizon.
Yeah, yeah.
I told my attorney and I was like, hey, get it ready.
The moment, the moment.
The moment they say, this is a series rap.
Yeah.
The moment.
Or a season rap, hopefully.
Whatever.
Whatever.
The moment we have a rap party and people are talking about, hey, rap gifts, make another crew neck sweater.
They're filing a claim.
There is a claim being filed.
Yes, yes.
Yeah.
And so litigation is on the horizon.
And so
it's going to be big.
It's going to be better.
Fred Armison is going to be a series regular on the show.
Fred Armison will be a series series regular.
These are not the kind of promises that our fans want.
And also, can I give you a Hollywood scoop?
Yeah, I guess.
That nobody knows.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
Is that I am recurring on the
TED animated series that will be coming out.
And I know, I know, I know it's not as, this is not as juicy as
but it's happening.
What do you play?
Like a doll that gets fucked by Ted or something?
I don't play.
I don't play.
Jesus.
Jesus fucking Christ.
No, I gives a shit.
I play like a guy.
I play like one of the main characters' best friends.
And it's Ron.
Well, this main character we all love.
And it's, and it's Ron.
So we can all name.
You're going to love the show.
And honestly, between us, Scott,
it's supplementing some of the income I'm not making with those episodes.
For those four episodes,
and I needed this.
No, it's fine.
I'm on your side about this.
I just don't think.
If this is as much of a scoop.
Yeah, it's not really really exclusive in the sense that we want.
All right, here's what I'm going to do for you.
Here's what I'm going to do for you.
In the time between this show, season two happening, and meaning the time between now and you filming?
Yeah, because we start shooting in December.
That's a scoop.
If you're in Chicago in December.
Yeah, wave hi at everyone.
And if you're a fan, come by.
Yeah.
Will you, if there's a comedy bang bang fan who comes by the set, will you personally greet them
and shake their hand and take a selfie?
That I can guarantee.
If they can find the set you're not telling everyone where the set is every day
I'm not gonna I'm not gonna hold you to that of like yeah yeah yeah a daily posting about oh we're gonna be over here and honestly I would you would do that I mean once we start shooting I feel like it's pretty easy I mean I'm posting about it a lot is there a code name you know the the the company signs that say where to park I'll say this I'll say this we shoot right across from the bear okay so if you know where the bear
popover is there gonna be the crossover episode this this I was begging them and now because Fred Armiston's on the show, maybe he can add to some of that heat.
Sure.
Some of the people that worked on The Bear worked on our show, you know.
And so it'd be hard to do a crossover episode because they're suddenly like
trying to pull double duty on both of these shows.
Yeah, but I do think that there's a space for that.
I think there's a space for that.
You're holding space for that.
I'm holding space for that.
And I think it's going to happen.
But again, this is a promise.
If I'm going to be in Chicago December 1st through through the holiday.
Through the holiday, if you see Asif
either on the set or partying or
whatever, approach me.
Approach him and say, is there some sort of secret thing?
Or just can you see it?
Say, you owe me an apology.
I will apologize to you in person and take a selfie with me.
That has to be the, you have to say those words.
You owe me an apology.
You owe me an apology.
And you'll know what that means.
And yell it at me.
Don't make it subtle.
And even if you're rolling.
Yes.
If you see me and we're we're shooting exteriors, and there's a police officer on a motorcycle trying to block off the street or whatever.
With his gun out, because that's what we have.
That's how secret it is.
You'll let security know that if these people say, oh, no, no, no, Asip owes me an apology,
they'll escort you in
into my trailer.
Okay.
And you can just sit there, enjoy some of the snacks.
And when I get in there, it'd be like, you owe me an apology.
Right.
They'll just be sitting there in whatever chair.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
In the honeywagon.
And depending on what you need from me,
you know, it is Hollywood.
The first, you know, it's like a a sweepstakes.
The first 10 people.
First 10 will get
a little extra.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Is that fair?
That's fair.
I think that's okay.
Because I do feel bad about it.
I do feel bad that you didn't get the first call because it did kind of hit me because it's kind of up in the air when you get an extension.
They don't give you like a.
I know.
And we had discussed it not only in the clip that we just heard, but we discussed it on Scott Hasn't Seen as well.
And you reiterated this promise.
And so
it kind of made me feel a little like, oh, he doesn't care about me.
I do.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
And I do care about, and, and, and, Scott, stop crying.
Do you have tissues here?
You've got to stop crying.
Oh, no, we don't.
There's no tissues in the house.
And because you use it for something else, you dirty dog.
Yeah, yeah.
And so I feel bad about what has happened.
And I really hope that, you know, we can move forward from this.
I'd like to move forward or at least laterally.
Laterally.
But never backwards.
No, never backwards.
And if there is, you know, a way I can maybe
take you to,
I could take you to dinner sometime.
Again, I'm not really a nice guy.
And I also feel bad because when we finished shooting Scott Hasn't Seen, you gave me some free merch.
Yeah, I did, yes.
And you took it on.
And I wore it.
And I wore it.
I took it home with me.
I took it to the gym.
Oh, really?
Did everyone kind of go like that?
People were kind of looking at me like, oh, industry insider, like, how did he get this?
This feels like limited edition merch and not merch that wasn't sold because the design wasn't really connecting with the fans.
Oh, we did all right with that design.
Just, you know, at the end of the tour, you have a lot left over.
In fact, I still have one hat and approximately two sweatshirts over there.
If anyone needs
anyone needs any of this stuff.
Okay.
But it just, we really did connect with the people at the gym.
And
I'm not ashamed to say that I'm, you know, on a joint Equinox account with eight other cousins.
And
because they will not probe into people who look similar to them.
Yes.
They won't say like, hey, you look a lot like.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so I'm there at Equinox and they kind of see it.
They're like, wow, comedy, this guy's in.
This is
business.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, this is fantastic.
At the very least, I want to congratulate you on
quite an achievement in show business.
A lot of people, especially now.
A lot of people don't get shows, and a lot of people who do get shows don't get second seasons.
But Deli Boys, people can certainly catch up with the first season right now on FX or on Huh.
On Hulu.
It's on Hulu.
It's on Hulu.
And they can anxiously await this being shot in December from the first week of December through the holidays, it sounds like.
Through like the end of January.
End of January.
So come through.
Come by.
Just come by the set and say you owe me an apology.
And you will get one.
And you'll get one.
This is fantastic.
Okay.
Well, welcome back and welcome into the second Timers Club.
Hey, thank you.
I don't know.
What does this entail?
The Second Timers Club?
That my career is now at a standstill?
Yeah, it's bad for you.
And I will never recover from this.
Yeah.
Because the One Timers Club is populated by the likes of Paul Rudd.
Of course.
Childish Gambino, Ben Stiller.
Damn.
Ben Stiller never came back.
He never came back.
And
you asked.
Well, did I ever ask?
We may have lost touch.
Did you ask?
Did you ask?
Oh, so I'm not the first celebrity that kind of faded.
Yeah, he never made me a promise in that one episode in the first three months of us doing the show 16 years ago.
He never made me a promise the way you did.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Such a cemented promise.
Yes, yes, yes.
So,
okay, well, let's do this.
Can you stick around?
Of course.
I have to.
I mean, if you're in the Two Timers Club, you got to stick around.
Here's a promise I'm going to make to you.
I am going to stick around.
Wow.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Hopefully, you'll keep this one.
We'll find out on the other side of this break.
When we come back, we have a couple of boys.
Oh, hell yeah.
You love this.
I don't know why you said it like that.
So nasty.
And we also have a folk singer on the show today.
This is a great show.
This is a great show.
We're going to come right back.
We're going to have more Asafali, more comedy bang bang.
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How many bang bang?
We are back.
Ausif Ali.
Deli boy, season one out on Hulu right now.
Season two coming to our TV screen same time, March.
Yeah, probably around March.
And can I say it feels better, you know, now that we've communicated and put our vibe feels better.
And this is what I want to tell everyone.
If you have an issue with anyone in your life, like I had with Ausif,
just get it out in the open, get it out there, get a couple microphones, invite him over to your studio, and just confront him on air.
Yeah, that's the way to do it.
And you feel good.
I feel so much better.
I feel so much better.
I think it's deepened and strengthened our friendship.
I think so.
I think the next time I get an announcement, you're going to be the first to know.
I would like that.
Anything about your career.
Yeah, I dropped a huge, I think the TED thing.
It really rocked your guys' career.
Yeah, but you've told other people about it.
No.
You haven't told a single person.
Nobody.
You're the first person.
All right.
That seems better.
Yeah.
Because it sounded like when you said it, you were sort of like.
No, they actually.
Oh, here's something your fans will be excited about.
They actually told me, like, don't, you know,
don't say it.
Keep it kind of under wraps because they haven't finished doing the whole season.
Okay, that's not bad.
Prepare yourself for getting fired when this comes out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But that's okay.
That's all right, sure.
Because it's worth my friendship with you.
It's worth it.
Exactly.
Well, speaking of friendship, we have a couple of guests on the show.
They were on back in May, I believe.
And let's talk to them.
Please welcome MacGarth, Darby, and Harris Teeter, aka the Boat Boys.
Wow.
McGarth Darby.
Harris Teeter.
Naima Mora.
Mamora Connecto.
We're back.
So confident.
Can you name a more iconic duo than that?
Not really.
Salt and pepper.
Salt and pepper.
Osifali.
Salt and pepper.
Scott Auckerman.
Naima Morakonag Duo.
Okay, that felt good.
It felt good, but there are a lot of more iconic duos than the two of us.
You two are icons.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
You are a duo.
Name more iconoguo.
Being an icon and a duo.
Name a more ion.
An iconic duo than that.
Yeah.
Wow.
Welcome back.
McGarth, which one of you is?
I'm McGarth.
You're McGarth, and you're Harris.
How dare you?
I'm Harris.
Clearly.
And we spoke to you in May.
Can you refresh our memory about what is the nature of your relationship?
We're both boys.
We're both boys.
We both live on the dock, Scott.
On our boats.
Oh, okay.
You live on a boat?
Our boats.
No, they have two separate boats.
Separate boats.
Parked across the dock from each other.
Wow.
Right nearby.
We're neighbors.
I thought they were side by side.
Side by side.
Nose to nose.
No, they're ass to ass.
Oh, yeah.
Now we're talking.
Now we're talking.
Ass too.
Ass too.
Back waiting for a dream style.
Come on.
I'm unfamiliar with that.
Okay, you're just chanting.
We don't watch TV, no.
Neither, we don't watch movies either.
That was a movie, I believe.
No, we don't watch TV movies either.
Did they make that?
I know.
TV is obsessed with IP.
Yeah.
Let's see a Requiem for a Dream limited series.
Yeah, a prequel.
Yeah.
Yeah, prequel.
Do you guys go fishing or what do you guys do?
Yeah, what do you print out?
We're professional lay about Sky.
We fish off the dock.
Oh, but we don't go into the ocean, no.
But
your boats are parked on the dock or moored to the dock.
Why don't you fish off the boat?
McGarth, McGarth, I just got an email written by AI from Scott Auckerman asking, remind me where y'all are from.
Oh,
well, Scott, does this answer the question?
If I'm Sham Creek, she shams me.
If I sham the creek, she shams me.
I don't have the creek.
She shams me.
I don't know creepy.
If I ever coming in, sham creek.
She's a sham.
We're from Sham Creek.
Sham Creek.
Shit.
That should be a ringtone.
It should be.
Good.
Unfortunately, we don't know how to quite chop that up.
You can ring my tone, Scott.
Tone.
They seem open.
Scott, between us, they seem like they're kind of open, like an open relationship.
Well, we talked about their relationship.
They're technically not in a relationship, right?
No, but we do hook up on the boats.
We hide at each other.
We look at each other
from side to side, wobbling back and forth in the waves.
Yep.
Until that urge hits us hard enough that we race across our boats onto the dock, slam into each other in the heat of sexual congress.
But we love that pussy on Champ Creek.
Oh, boy.
Oh, the pussy is wetter than the fucking water.
Oh, my God.
That's really wet.
To be wetter than water?
There's WAP on Champ Creek.
Oh, WAP, WAP, WAP, WAP, WAP.
My God.
This is just...
Have you ever been to Charleston, South Carolina?
Never.
People have told me to avoid it, actually.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Why?
Do too.
Because the oysters make you too horny.
Yeah, there's too many Afro DJs.
And I'm really concerned, you know.
Oysters, pineapple, rich chocolate.
Naima Mora Iconic Trio.
What did you say, McGurth?
I didn't say anything.
Oh, okay.
I saw your lips moving.
I said Naimor Iconic Trio.
Oh, you did?
Trio?
Do you think I was a duo?
Trio, I don't know.
How do you pronounce it?
Troyo.
Trio.
Trio.
Trio.
What did you say?
Trio.
Trio.
Trio.
Tro.
Don't mock us.
You have an accent to us.
I'll cut you stem to stern.
That's boat.
That's boat boat.
Have you ever walked on a boat, Scott?
I walked so others could run on boats.
Whoa.
No, you're not allowed to run on boats.
You can't run on a boat.
You shouldn't.
You're allowed to, but one shouldn't run.
do you think you are, Captain Jack Sparrow?
You can't be running on a boat.
But he's drunk.
He's an alcoholic.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
We're Jack Sparrow, don't we, folks?
Yeah.
We love his jewelry.
We love his accessories.
And we love that eyeball.
Turquoise.
Name other things about him.
That hat?
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Yep.
Jewelry.
Jewelry.
The voice, that accent, that Keith Richards style accent.
Boots.
Boots, yeah.
He's a boot boy.
Boot boy.
A lot of people don't know this about Scott, but he does the thing that Johnny Depp does, which was when he's like in important scenes and stuff, he'll wear an ear, like an earpiece, and play like...
That's one of the things I do that Johnny Depp used to do
that he can talk about legally, but that's the one we can talk about.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I wear an earpiece during the show, and I'm being fed what to say during the show the entire time.
Time for Scott's feeding.
Uh-oh, Scott needs to make a number two.
So, MacGarth and Harris, what have you been up to since May?
That's the last time and first time that we spoke to you.
By the way, welcome to the Two Timers Club.
Thanks.
All of us are on the Two Timers Club.
This is pretty cool.
Whoa!
Ossie Folly!
MacGarth Darby!
Harris Tater!
My Mamara Iconic Trio!
This is fun.
I like this.
We've been preparing for a barbecue, Scott.
Oh,
you're hosting a barbecue?
Absolutely.
We do annually.
Annually.
You co-host it?
We co-host it
on the docks.
On the docks and stuff, because
to be on one boat or the other would be too difficult to choose.
So you do it on the dock.
We do it on the docks.
It's early September, right?
Yes, it is.
We're layabouts.
We don't really keep track of the Gregorians.
I remember you guys.
I remember them.
You do.
They were the guys on that dock where all the black people had to descend and fight them.
Was that you, that video?
Wow.
Racial profiling.
No.
Those were people that look exactly like you.
We would get confused with them all the time.
This is cash.
Those are our brothers.
One of those Equinox situations we were talking about.
Didn't someone reenact that recently for the anniversary of them?
Yes, yes.
A lot of people did.
We're lovers, not fighters.
Okay, okay.
If you see us on a dock, we're copulating.
Oh, that's right.
You don't seem to do a lot on your boats, on your respective boats.
No, we like to hang out on the dock unless we're going on the boat.
And if you know we're going on the boat, we're going to be locking eyes with each other through the backs of our boats.
But on the dock, you guys hook up anything goes on the dock no sex on the boat no only i think we talked about that no sex no masturbating on the boat yeah no wow so you guys have never done like a basketball diaries thing where you just lay on your back on the roof and i don't know what it is scott hasn't seen you've got to come back
you've never seen basketball diaries never seen that was on the list is that what you say now just instead you went down to manchester by the sea
fun movie anytime you haven't seen a movie in your life now you just go scott hasn't seen you don't know me well enough to talk to me that way you must not know about me.
You must not know about me.
I could watch Manchester by the sea.
And he'll be here in a minute.
So you have a big barbecue coming up.
When is this barbecue?
Oh, it's about three months away on date redacted.
Whoa.
Christmas Day, perhaps.
Christmas Day barbecue?
Nope.
Date redacted.
No, it's on date redacted.
Three months from September.
Okay, this is September 8th.
Four months.
Four months from September.
On date redacted.
Date redacted.
Okay, so in January 8th or so.
Pretty close.
January 11th.
No.
You're getting colder.
January 6th.
Big Maddox.
Big along, a long, lang.
You win the prize.
That's right.
Very important anniversary to you both, bro.
Yeah.
The day that we rekindled our relationship, just like YouTube right now.
Yep, we saw each other.
We locked eyes on our nation's capital.
Oh, you guys were there.
Oh, yeah.
Interesting.
And doing what?
Tourist stuff.
We were just taking pictures.
With props.
Yeah.
Famously wasn't much of a line that day.
You could just get right in there.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, definitely not an organized line.
Okay, yes, yes, of course, of course.
Did you take any souvenirs with you?
Yeah.
Came back to the docks.
Yeah, I took a lot of time.
I took out a pen from Nancy Pelosi's desk.
And I took a shit on it.
Oh.
Okay, so I know you guys.
You may have seen us on some Facebook videos.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And on YouTube.
And during the hearings, I believe, all the stitched together videos.
Oh, sure.
Did you make it to those?
We made a couple of appearances in those.
Yeah, but we've been...
So we got to start slow cooking our meat for this barbecue.
That's happening January date redaction.
Yeah, we're slow.
How slow are we at?
Like what temp are we talking about?
Are we at five degrees?
Over the course of four months?
We're at
35 degrees to start, just to get things nice and brown.
And I mean, you just take it down one degree by one degree every day or something.
Slow, slow, slow.
We're going down, down, baby.
Meat is cooking rarely.
Baby.
Ready to eat some meat.
And what kind of sides are we talking about?
Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa, folks.
Okay, okay, okay.
What kind of sides?
What kind of meat?
Like, what's the full?
Yeah, what's going on here?
Okay, I can pass it to you now.
Baked.
Well, the beans are going to be baked, my friend.
Oh, fuck it.
Come on.
The beans are going to be baked.
It's a big old hunk and chunk of ribs, Scott.
We got a big old rack of ribs.
Baby back?
Baby back.
So you do want your baby back.
I want my baby back.
You need your baby back.
So you guys are making ribs.
You're making baked beans.
Anything else?
Or
chili?
Chili.
Chili.
So we got baby back ribs, barbecue sauce.
Baked beans.
Chili.
Barbecue sauce, and barbecue sauce.
Yes.
Barbecue sauce.
Okay, so those.
My barbecue sauce.
Wait, one of your sides is barbecue sauce.
We serve it on the side like a soup.
Oh, it's thick.
You're eating that with a spoon, slurp, slurp, slurp.
I'm slurping.
Yeah, guess about your stuff.
There's nothing like a group soup.
You ever have a group soup?
I've never had a group soup.
This is like the group burrito that Perry Farrell wanted to make during Wallapalooza, the early years.
He's doing short.
He's doing great.
Lately, he's been doing better.
We saw him on Date Redacted.
He was there.
Yeah.
This seems like a limited menu.
Just four items on his soul.
What about bread?
So you want some kind of spread out genre-less menu.
Yeah.
Oh, I want to be able to order everything.
It's a barbecue.
Give me a turtle.
Can I have a sushi roll?
I'll take a bowl of cereal.
I don't want to be like Jerry's deli.
You're sick.
You're a sick.
You're a sick man.
I don't want just four things, one of them being a sauce.
I want a bonkoon roll.
You're a sick man.
From a Vietnamese restaurant.
We got a blue stater on our hands.
Oh, please, can I have a bonus?
He's eating at Alcove.
Oh, yeah.
In the outside.
The outside.
Yeah, he's not over at the Al Fresco.
He's working on his screenplay at Alcove right now.
He tried to submit for Deliboy Season 2, and they're like not interested.
He's evidently.
That's mainly my big problem with you.
Yeah, you gotta put the word in.
Al Fresco is going to be at the barbecue.
Oh, Al Fresco will be there.
Okay.
Okay, so the sides are pretty limited, but the meat is going to be great.
And then, are there any activities?
Yeah.
Any games that people can play?
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Okay, what do we got?
What do we talk?
Backyard games.
Backyards.
Even though this is not in the backyard.
Backyard Dogs.
Find the Clintons.
Oh.
We put a bunch.
It's like a Weresmold, though, but it's on the ground.
Oh.
And it's covered in all different kinds of liberals.
And you find, you got to sort through.
This is on the dock or on the
dock on the ground.
Imagine like a Twister game.
You ever play Twister?
Yeah.
Have you ever put your body in a pretzel?
I press play on Twister.
I mean, come on.
Don't we play Len Powell?
Which one?
The old one.
The old one.
Scott is old school.
Scott hasn't seen the new one.
Wow.
Damn.
Harris Titter hasn't seen the new one either.
Oh, you got to come on.
We got to watch this.
Come on.
He doesn't like Len Powell.
I think his face is is too small for his head.
He's an AI head.
Whoa.
You think he's an industry plant?
I think he's made out of AI.
You think ones and zeros?
Ones and zeros.
Glenn Powell, the creation of Glenn Powell is sucking the water out of the Great Lakes.
Yeah.
By the way, ones and zeros, name a more iconic duo.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Okay.
That really threw me from a lot.
I can't think of one.
Blew my mind.
I mean, but you wouldn't just say one, zero.
That'd just be 10.
What's the combination of ones and zeros?
Then it's many ones and zeros.
What are you trying to say?
100.
1,000.
2,000.
3,000.
3,000.
Hey, do you guys think that's it?
4,000.
Uh-huh.
Name a more iconic.
Sink up.
Do you guys think Scott's head is the right size?
Yeah, proportionate to my body, do you?
I think your face and your head fit perfect.
Thank you.
Gosh, what a birth.
That's so
so much.
I'd love to have you on the dock.
Oh, this feels sexual.
I don't think I'd want to be on the dock necessarily, but I wouldn't mind going on your boat.
No, you're coming on the dock, and we're going to paint your portrait.
Scott, you're sweet.
With jizz.
Whoa.
Meaning you're just going to come in my face.
Yeah.
That's one of the barbecue guys.
You said it, not me.
Have you ever painted
one of the signs famously?
Pin the tail on the donkey.
Scott's holding up a sign that says, I'm good at taking ropes.
Whoa.
Okay.
That's right.
Harrison.
He's a private sign.
You said it.
Why would you write that down if you didn't want us to read it all?
He's writing it on his whiteboard and showing it to us.
But we're not supposed to read that.
He says he's a protein boy underneath it.
He says, shoot your ropes at me.
Okay.
Okay, you want us to?
Crazy.
Do you guys think my head is the appropriate size?
Absolutely.
Oh, I think it's nice.
Thank you.
You can be on the boat.
watching us on the dock shooting ropes at Scott.
And honestly, I promise I will be there for that.
If If that happens, okay, there's another promise.
There's another promise that I will keep.
We're boat boys.
Scott, you ever put a fish in your ass?
No, I can't say that I've had the occasion to.
You need to do that immediately.
What kind of fish and what kind of ass some kind of big one?
Big fish, your ass.
Name a more iconic two-oh.
Like a grouper or something, or a wreckfish.
Or an upper fish.
That's a
upper fish.
Oh, yeah.
I pressed play on big fish once.
I bet you did.
Did you cry?
Did you cry?
Did you cry?
Did it get you?
So you've seen the Big Fish?
I watched that TV show us on.
Did you cry?
Did you cry?
Did you cry?
Did you cry?
Are you a mama's boy or a daddy's boy?
Did you cry, both boy?
I am a both boy.
Both boy.
Name them more iconic.
Both boy.
Both boy.
Both boys and both boys.
So if you cried at Big Fish, that makes you a daddy's boy.
What mama's boy movie did you cry at?
Say it.
Don't you dare say Pennington.
Throw mama from the train.
Oh, Shep!
I haven't seen it.
I have not seen that.
MacGarth hasn't seen it.
Oh, that's a good spin-off.
Yeah, people listening.
You looking to do another podcast?
Oh, sure.
I mean, I got all the time in the world, except for when Shep is knocking on my door.
Wait, who's Shep?
You know Shep.
Who's Shep again?
He's from Southern Charms.
Oh.
The charmiest of all the charm on Southern Charms.
Is this one of these TV shows that I need to be caught up on to understand your bit?
No.
Nope.
Not a usual.
She's a charming guy.
You need to live in Charleston, South Carolina to understand this bit.
We implore you to not watch Southern Charm.
Done and done.
So, who's invited to this?
What's the guest list of
the list?
Oh, who isn't invited?
Chuck Dolly.
Chuck Dolly.
Anna Knapp.
Yep.
Who else?
And a Nap?
Anna Knapp.
Anna Knapp.
It's a woman.
Oh, okay.
But also her, I mean, her fiancé, Amanda Knapp.
Amanda Knapp.
And then her cousin, Damanda Knapp.
Whoa.
And, of course, their father, Reprimanda Knapp.
There's a whole extended family that we could go into.
Basically, the Knapp family is coming.
The Knapp family will be there.
All right.
Benjamin Ravenel, Abernathy Doolittle.
All our friends.
All your good buddies.
Dorothy B.
Hive.
And what do you do for a living?
I can't say.
Chase Bank.
What do we do for a living?
Yeah.
We're layabouts.
We're coming from money.
Oh.
His family owns a Harris Teeter grocery store.
Now, if you have never been to a Harris Teeter, you're going to want to go there immediately.
You can buy yourself a boogie board.
You can buy yourself a pool noodle.
Whoa.
You can buy yourself a big hat for the summertime.
It's like an REI.
Produce.
REI.
Oh, yeah.
No, it's grocery store.
Oh.
You can buy yourself some can too.
Harris Teeter's anti-REI.
Whatever it means.
Whatever it means.
I've never been in one and I'll never walk in one.
Okay, fair enough.
But my family comes from money, too.
Oh, what did your family do?
We have
an old, ancient home on the ground.
Like a cave?
How ancient are we talking about?
How does that make money?
200 years old.
200 years old.
We had tours of the old house.
Okay, it's a historical place.
Big old house.
It's a historical place.
People have weddings there sometimes.
Most people walk around it.
And
your family was slave owners?
Oh, no, no.
I was going to ask.
Slave renters.
Centuries ago, it was used for activities redacted.
I see.
So that's what it says on the placard, activities redacted.
Now we just have a beautiful garden.
People come look at the garden.
They look at the pond.
They go in the gift shop to get them some old chair.
Old chair?
Old chair.
Old chairs.
Seems like
not the most compact item, you know, like keychains.
The room is big.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
Harris holds a lot of chairs.
All right, Harris.
Chairs.
People.
One more.
Office building.
Okay.
I thought you were, I got Harris too.
I thought you were going to go somewhere else with that.
I was going more the couch direction when I said chair.
Well, that's a big, that's a bigger chair than an office chair.
But they both are in
the chair family.
The chair and a couch would be, yeah, things you sit on.
So your family, after being done with
slavery, they sort of just
then got into grocery stores, just to be clear.
I never said my family was into activity redacted.
Okay, okay.
My family now owns Chick-fil-A.
Oh, yeah.
Say less, honey.
Say less.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you, I, didn't I read about you, McGarth, that your family was one of the few after slavery was abolished to kind of keep it going
for another 150 years or so?
I'm not going to get into this, okay?
It's all dynamite stuff.
But I will say, everyone was very happy.
Okay.
An agreement was made.
Everyone loved their lives.
Let's just say, economically,
three minutes later.
So I think you understand.
My favorite Duran Duran lyric.
economically.
Three minutes later.
You're not speaking my language, Rural.
Sorry.
It's not Tom Petty.
Huh?
Huh?
Never mind.
He's from Florida.
Okay, sorry.
Gainsville Boys.
Did you read Mike Campbell's autobiography?
Did you listen to Paul Simon's Graceland?
I've done the latter, not the former.
That's a great Duran Duran lyric, I'm sure.
Sure, okay.
Okay.
Have you ever done that Scott hasn't listened to?
Oh, no, I haven't yet.
Scott has an heard the album and talking about it.
Oh, yeah, I gotta do that.
You should do that.
Oh, hell yeah.
Okay.
Do you know what I invented, by the way, Scott?
What's that?
When you go to Chick-fil-A and they have all those teens out there in the boiling hot ass.
You've never been inside one.
And there's a big old line wrapping around the entire
mall parking lot.
Yeah.
Long, long line.
I invented having those teens go out there with the iPads.
Whoa.
Okay.
Teen pads.
Te teens.
Teens.
Teen pads.
Not teen pads.
Okay.
Teen pads.
Teen pads.
Okay.
Also, what I call the tampons and the pads I provide for the teens.
You provide them?
So this is not through the restaurant?
This is a service that you're providing?
This is me, my professional label.
I said, Daddy, get me the Chick-fil-A.
I need to stock up on those toes.
This is gender-affirming care.
This is actually really nice, actually.
Thank you.
McGarf loves to affirm gender.
Wow.
And care for it.
You're a man.
You're a man.
You're a man.
I'm a man.
Don't go into that bathroom.
What are you going to do in there?
One or two?
I got to know.
One and two.
I like it.
Name a more iconic duo.
Truly.
My mind is blown.
Dang.
I can't.
I can't.
Then one and two.
My mind is blown.
More than my uncle, who was in trouble with the law for activity redacted and then took a shotgun and activity redacted himself.
Whoa.
I think I get the other one.
That's how blown my mind is.
Interesting.
My mind is blown more than Superman's rope shooting through my skull.
You ever think about that?
You love comic books.
Yeah.
If Superman were to get oral sex, his load would be a shotgun blast.
Well, also,
he's crypto, get off the bed.
He's invulnerable everywhere, but he's more of everything.
So his balls hurt more when you kick him in the balls.
So I don't know why Luther hasn't kicked him in the balls ever.
And how come Luther hasn't exploded his erogenous zones?
Superman, don't get horny.
I'll see you in hell.
Scott, you ever put your balls inside a pelican's mouth?
I can't say that I have, no.
And filled it with hot water and then tickled the pelican under his belly and made him gargle so that your balls feel good in the hot water inside the pelican's mouth.
I don't believe I have.
No.
Oh, you need to do that at the barbecue.
Is that what we call wonton soup?
Is that?
Because I want
on
the soup.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Get that going for the barbecue and invite me.
I think Osip and I would love to go.
I know that that you're still shooting your show on
it.
Yeah, you'll bake that into the screen.
I'll bake that into the contract, yeah.
Okay, great.
You'll be shooting your show.
We'll be shooting our shot on the dock in the form of a rope.
On the Scott Auckerman's portrait, a.k.a.
face.
Yeah.
We'll make sure that we're going to be there.
Need I say more.
I would rather you didn't.
I will say more in the next segment.
Okay, so just to be clear, there's going to be a barbecue that you will be hosting
in Charleston, South Carolina.
Actually,
there will be an 8x11, a bunch of 8x11s on the ground of liberals, and we'll have to find Bill Clinton.
That's right.
And then at the end, after we've eaten, I'm assuming we'll all get together and shoot ropes.
Yeah, you got it.
That's right.
And listen to me right now.
When you're in Charleston,
you're going to drive into the
airport.
This is key.
You're going to go past.
You're going to go down like you're going downtown.
Here it comes.
But then you're going to make a lift.
That's important.
Okay.
I'm going to go ahead and you're going to turn.
You're going to drive on a Mount Pleasant.
Please pay attention to this next one.
I'm going to write this down.
And as you're going by, you're going to pass on your left.
There's going to be a, what was it?
Juanita Greenberg.
Juanita Greenberg's.
You're getting it.
That means you are very close to Shem Creek.
And then if you get, if you hit Sullivan's Island.
Too far.
You're going too far.
Turn around.
First off, you probably have the windows up.
Roll them down.
You're going to notice Shem Creek by the smell of the good pussy coming off that hot creek.
Okay, we're talking summer wops.
You're going to get there.
You're going to want to get yourself a dry martini.
Humid wop.
Wop, wop, wop, wop, wop.
Certified pussy file.
Come on.
Come on.
Release the Epstein falls.
Aka, the pussy falls, I want to know.
Release them all.
Release them all and catch them all.
And let God certify them.
Gotta catch them all.
Gotta catch them.
Pick a two, swim.
Pick a two.
Epstein, name of the more iconic duo.
All right.
We got there.
Catch them all.
You You got to catch them all.
We got there.
Well, guys, we'll make time for this in January.
Fantastic.
Just send the E-viter away.
We do have to take a break.
When we come back, we have a folk singer.
Will you guys stick around?
Bob Dylan.
Harmonica.
The guy Bob Dylan ripped off.
Pete Seeger.
Pete Seeger.
Timothy Shalomite.
Niven More iconic duo.
All right.
When we come back, we will have.
Tony Guthrie.
Sure.
There you go.
We'll have an iconic single person.
Jax Elliott.
Right?
Who is it?
Maybe.
I don't know.
Jesse Wells.
Jesse Helms.
Jesse Waters.
Jesse Waters.
Jesse.
Jesse Waters.
More iconic folk singer.
Jesse Plemens.
When we come back,
our good friend Glenn Plappinger will be back.
Plus, we'll have more from Asavali, more from the Boat Boys.
We'll be right back after this.
At the University of Arizona, we believe that everyone is born with wonder.
That thing that says, I will not accept this world that is.
While it drives us to create what could be,
that world can't wait to see what you'll do.
Where will your wonder take you?
And what will it make you?
The University of Arizona.
Wonder Makes You.
Start your journey at wonder.arrizona.edu.
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They don't want to hear about it.
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Company bang bang, we're back.
Asafali is here from Deli Boys, season two on its way in 2026, but season one people can still watch on Hulu.
And we also have the Boat Boys.
Boat Boys.
All the way from
Sham Creek.
She shamed me.
She shams, man.
I don't have to sham Sham Creek's man.
If I ever did shampoo,
that's right, Sham Creek.
I needed the reminder.
That's where we're from.
We're from.
Thank you for asking.
We are from Shim Crook.
Wait.
Were your headphones working there?
They were, yeah.
Because I just got another text from you that said, remind me where you're from again.
No, just kidding.
Just kidding.
We're messing with our friend, Scott Auckerman.
I don't know.
And we're back on Comedy Bang Bang.
We are back, folks.
And we've got Osifali here, and we've got Scott Auckerman.
See Block, motherfucker.
Did you guys see Deli Boys?
Oh, yeah.
Are you kidding me?
Onyx, which streams on Hulu?
Yeah, yeah.
Absolutely.
In for a penny, in for a pound.
Okay, man.
Oh, yeah.
No, we did watch that show.
Did you see what the reach is?
You know, I didn't know.
Terry, no, I mean, yeah, all the way down to where are you guys from again?
Oh,
Sham Creek.
No, fooled you again.
You already know.
You fooled me.
Sham Creek.
Sham Creek.
Which you pronounce as Shim Creek.
Sham.
I did not say Shim.
You said Shim once.
No, no.
Let's go listen to the clip.
No.
Are you going to play it right now.
Reframe again?
Shim Crog.
Don't play into his hand, McGarth.
I'm so sorry.
An absolute slurper of Blue State hater age.
I do not like to be emasculated.
No, we love Dilly Boys.
Asif Ali, Sagar Shaikh, Porno Jagannathan, Naimamore, Iconic Trio.
McGarth, where were you?
I'm so sorry.
I was literally staring at you.
Wow.
Enrapture.
Honestly.
Unbelievable.
I I just feel so relaxed with y'all.
I feel like I'm going to be able to do that.
Well, we like for you to make yourself at home here.
Okay,
I'm going to jack off.
Whoa, okay.
We're throwing it up.
We're going to throw some rope around.
Why don't you wait until C-Block is going to be a little bit more powerful?
Scott, have you ever taken your pinky fingers and put them inside of the asshole of a dolphin who's pregnant?
I can't say that I have.
No.
What benefit with me?
You need to do that.
Why would
you love that in what yeah what how for the novelty of it Scott
Scott if you're gonna come and hang out with us you need to do that
just for laughs
of course just for lols you know we do improv you remember last time we were oh did you talk about doing improv last time we did a herald for you that's right
life is a herald I'm gonna yes and all night long
you guys think you guys think Scott is kind of like a sexual square, it sounds like.
We can tell he needs to be opened up.
Yeah.
He needs to be prodded and poked.
He needs to be.
He needs a spreader bar on his ankles.
All right.
He needs a muzzle on his mouth, you know.
He needs his holes widened.
Yeah, face down ass actually.
He needs to be whipped in front of deli boys.
Season one, Hulu, Onyx.
All right.
Well,
we need to get to our next guest, if that's all right with you.
He's been on the show many times.
He is a folk singer and has been for quite a long time, haven't you?
Hi there, Scott.
It's wonderful to be here.
I haven't quite introduced you.
Please welcome Glenn Plapplinger.
Hi there, it's Plappinger, Scott.
Plappinger, I've been on many times, but you keep adding the L and taking it away, don't you?
Hey, you know,
moving around the L.
That's right.
Moving around the L just like I move around the highways and byways of America.
That's right, just like you do in Chicago when you film Deliboy.
Absolutely.
Moving around the L.
That's right.
It's wonderful to have you back, Glenn.
You are a folk singer.
You're a folk singer.
You've been that ever since.
I've been that since, well, gosh, since folk came about.
That's right.
I was down there.
I was down there in the Lower East Side with Bobby D., as we called him back then.
Or Robert Z, as we even called him.
Robert De Niro, wow.
Robert De Niro was.
Robert Zemekis.
Robert Zemekis.
Robbie Z.
Zemekis in the corner doing what he did.
Making back to the future.
He was working on that back in the 60s.
Well, that's how he came up with the idea, Scott.
He popped in and out.
He said, I actually built a time machine.
That's how I'm here.
And then he went forward, made that movie, and came back.
Went forward, watched his movie.
Watched his movie, came back,
listening to some great folk music.
He's like, let's run it back again.
1958.
Yeah,
fantastic.
Well, welcome back to the show.
I mean, you're a
historic piece of music history.
Well, yes, I'm.
You use history twice in sense.
Yes, self-referential history, Scott.
And history is a circle, isn't it?
It truly is.
Ouro Boros.
An Ouro Boros.
A snake eating its tail.
And in fact, you know,
I've been out promoting a new album.
Oh, you have a new record?
I have a new record.
Yeah, that's what.
Sorry?
A long player?
A long player.
It's longer than an LP.
Even longer.
So an ELP?
An ELP.
You have to have a special player to play it.
Are you selling those?
I'm selling the player.
It's kind of like...
So Neil Young and his Pono?
Yes, it's Neil Young's Pono, but for a longer play, a better listen,
and it's kind of like one of those flavored straw things that you can get these days.
Oh, yeah.
A circle!
A circle circle.
Circle.
Pono, circle.
If there isn't some.
Name a more iconic
obsolete object.
Spicer disc.
Tape.
Tape.
Tape?
I used tape the other day.
You used tape?
I did.
Did you really?
Probably mouth tape.
You have sleep bath news.
Scott, you you need to just type down your mouth.
I hate my double chin.
I'm taping my mouth tonight.
The science is real.
So, Glenn, what is the
concept album?
Yes, it is, Scott.
It's a concept album.
It's a concept album called The Age of Exponential.
The Age of Exponential.
The Age of Exponential, Scott.
This sounds like a flaming lips kind of thing.
Well, you know, we folk singers, we talk about the present, don't we?
We talk about the present and what needs to change.
That's right.
And we're in an age of growth, and Scott, I'm here to tell you that we've got a lot of growing to do.
Okay, well,
look, can I...
I don't want to necessarily pimp you into this, but would you mind playing one of the songs?
Oh, really?
Would I mind?
I'd love to, Scott.
Oh, my God.
Which one do you want to hear?
Well, not knowing what any of them are,
why don't you pick them up?
Yeah, yeah.
Let's see.
Let's see.
Well, we've been talking about, you know, the boat boys are here, so, you know, I do have a lot of songs about water and nature.
Maybe we could play a little song.
of that.
Are you guys interested in water or nature?
We're all ears, Glenn.
My ears are perked.
Yeah, here's one.
Uh, this one I call the fish, Scott.
The fish,
okay, good name.
When I look out on the water, I just have one wish
that I'd throw my line in
and catch a silver fish,
reel it in upon the dock, look into its eyes.
Have that fish tell me truth and tell me no more lies.
Take the water, drain it out, and build a gorgeous dam.
Have it power an AI thing that can tell us somewhat
that can tell up all the land.
Take the land and tear it down.
Make it nice and flat.
and build a parking lot
where the fish was wet.
Make sure that nature
is under our hand.
Grab her by the forelock and make her understand.
Nature is ours to take and do all that we can.
And that's the story of the fish as it wriggles in my hand.
What the fuck?
All right, go ahead, go ahead.
Yes,
I hate to cut you off.
I know.
We should have cut me off earlier.
I don't even know what to do.
I find myself cutting you off usually on the show.
Almost as if you don't know the ends to these songs.
The songs always have an end, Scott.
The songs always have an end.
That's the nature of a song.
That's the nature of a song.
But I end up cutting you off,
which I apologize for.
But that one, it seems to be you're advocating for the raising of all of our natural resources in order to power AI.
Well, you have to cut it down to build it back again, don't you, Scott?
What the fuck are you talking about?
Are you okay?
AI is good.
AI is good.
How else will I think of my grocery list?
Scott, the other day I.
I'm going to wait.
Of course, of course.
I'm back.
I'm back.
I'm for it.
You're right.
You're right.
That's all it took.
There you go.
Now you know.
You can use AI to put tits on anything, Scott.
On your guitar?
The first thing I did.
When the internet came out, I googled one thing.
And that was bikinis.
And it showed me bikinis.
When AI came out, I put in tits on a guitar, and it did it, Scott.
Technology's magic.
Are there other things you put tits on?
I've put tits on everything.
Do you want to hear?
I have a song about that.
Oh, yeah, I'd love to hear it.
I'd love to hear that.
I love that.
I'd put tits on Auckerman.
High up on the hill,
there's a whipper will.
He's singing songs
of freedom.
He lands upon my sill.
The beautiful whipper will.
I've just one question.
Do you want to see them?
Could you put tits on a whipper whale?
Could you put tits on a whipper whale?
Could you make them big and round
and An eight in number.
Oh, shit.
Could you have them fly around the sky?
This guy's a freak.
Okay, and now I'm going to cut you.
Yeah, yeah.
Certified freak.
You want eight breasts on one bird.
You could type in Whipperwill8Tits Scott and it'll show it to you.
How small are you?
I'm going to take you up on that.
The Whipperwill ain't that big.
Do you have the premium account?
I have the premium account of every AI.
Wow.
I've got the Anthropic.
I've got the Chat GPT.
And I've got all the other things.
How much are you blowing?
Like $100 a month?
I'm blowing like the wind, my friend.
And I'm blowing over.
Yeah, I'm blowing a cool G on AI, putting tits on everything I can imagine.
Speaking of blowing, and put tits on Ackerman, I'd be blowing one hell of a road.
I think the problem when I Google Whoop or Will ate tits is that a tit is a bird as well, I think.
So
it's just showing.
You just need that algorithm to sort it out.
You're just kind of creating a Dr.
Moreau nightmare of birds on birds.
Birds on birds on birds.
Birds on birds.
Yeah.
Well,
I didn't expect this from you.
I mean,
you've always been a political
and folks, folk music in general has been a political art form, but usually on the other side of the aisle.
Well, that's right.
I mean, I don't, I don't, but you know, the center can't hold, Scott.
And
there is no left and right anymore.
We just need to do away with all that.
The American Party, if you get my
grip.
This guy's hinting at the Red-Brown Alliance.
Absolutely.
The horseshoe effect.
This guy definitely tapes his mouth.
Absolutely.
I do tape my mouth, Scott.
But not to be silenced.
I won't be silenced.
I will always speak the truth.
I will tape my mouth to come harder in the morning.
That's when I usually do it.
And you will do that.
Hey, man.
Shoot that rope, King.
So
you're a morning bust.
I'm a morning bust.
Absolutely.
Wake up.
Wake up and nut.
That's another song off this house.
Wait, let's hear it.
No, I can't hear it.
That's the hit single.
Let's hear it.
Come on, that's the name.
Let's go.
Come on.
Sun is rising.
This one's up tempered.
Cup of coffee in my hand.
Oh, really?
Sun is rising.
I'm nutting across the land.
You gotta wake up, wake up, wake up and nut.
Wake up and nut, you silly butt.
Wake up, wake up, wake up and nut.
That's the way to make America great again.
Oh, okay.
Okay, all right, all right, Glenn, Glenn.
Yeah.
Oh, I like that.
Yeah, yeah.
How are you achieving this with one hand having a cup of coffee and then
I'm playing?
And you're playing.
And I'm playing.
I wake up.
I nut.
I got a cup of coffee in my hand and I'm playing.
Oh, wow.
This guy's a no-hand ropesmith.
Glenn, you can add.
So you've never heard of this.
We salute you, Glenn.
You can add tits to anything.
You can add a hand to any song.
Isn't that right, Scott?
wow wow you guys ever wake up so hard that you nut so hard all over your bed sheets that your cleaning woman says what am i gonna do so you you wake up so hard so do you have a cleaning woman on the boat oh yeah she stopped by that's the only women allowed on the boat
real briefly of course we've locked eyes when the cleaning woman is doing her thing on the boat you guys ever dock with each other oh yeah oh yeah you mean you should come to the dock
yeah where do you live again Glenn?
I'm a rambler in the Rover Scott all over.
You're riding the rails, Glenn?
I'd riding the rails.
Well, I hate trains.
I mean, I just.
You get train sick?
Well, I get train sick.
I hate the idea of them.
I get car sick as well.
Well, not that it's ever since I got the Cybertruck Scott.
Oh, now I don't.
Now I don't.
Is it the efficient use of energy or is it being next to your fellow man who's probably got less money than you?
Exactly.
It's always the second.
It's always the second.
Here, here, Glenn.
We don't want to get on a train and actually have to see another person, do you?
No.
It's too democratized.
It's to be democratized.
Democracy's dying.
I think we've seen that, Scott.
Techno-feudalism.
Techno-feudalism is the way to go.
Corporate nation space.
What color is your cyber truck?
Is it a matte of some kind?
It's a matte gold.
Matt gold with matte gold with a sparkle coat.
Oh.
I bet people look at it and they say, is it brass?
Is it a copper car?
Copper car.
I don't want to speak out of turn here, but it seems like you guys have kind of a connection.
And I don't know what your gig, your tour schedule is, but would you consider potentially playing at
a barbecue that needs some energy?
Sorely in need of some energy.
As long as it's not a sanctuary city, I'll be there.
Uh-oh, this is not providing Charleston, South Carolina, is not providing sanctuary to anybody unless they're wearing sparry top solders.
Do you let me ask you something?
Do you have a pink polo?
I have a pink, a pink,
I'm now touring exclusively in polo.
You're sponsored by Ralph Loretta?
Yes.
What's the other one with
vineyard vines?
But what's the
laurel?
The laurel on it.
Fred Perry.
Yes, I also wear.
Oh, thank God.
I'll wear a Fred Perry.
I'll wear a Fred Perry.
You're a proud.
I'm going to take you.
I'm a proud person.
In downtown Charleston, there's a place called Some Ass.
M dumbass and sons.
M.
Dumbass and Sons.
I'm going to take you there.
I would love it.
And in fact, you're the first person that I've ever met that doesn't look like me.
Wow.
Well, hey, you know what?
And I respect you.
I have respect.
That would be great, man.
Wow.
If you play this, if you play your concert at our date-redacted barbecue and Asif opens and we boo him mercilessly.
Oh, almost like a gathering of the juggalos type thing.
Are you Juggalo?
I'm not a Juggalo, but okay.
Do you know what that word means?
McGrath.
Of course I do.
Juggalo, they're the clowns.
Oh, okay.
Oh, all right.
Yeah.
When I bought my car, I saw Juggalo eating at a Mexican restaurant next to me.
Juanita Greenberg.
Well, hey, Glenn,
speaking of copper cars,
I'm looking at your record right here.
Don't you have a song about the police on this?
Yeah, oh, I always have a song about the police.
You know, this was the first song I wrote about the police, Scott, and it finally made its way on because I don't think the police get enough respect these days.
Oh, no, no.
And I think,
and this is from the point of view of a young police officer who's on it on his job for the first day.
Oh, wow, okay, first day, you know, rookie.
He's a rookie cop.
And I always thought this would be a good TV show.
Speaking of before,
no one's done a rookie.
Unfortunately, I can't say this one's for me.
Yeah, this one's for you.
There's been a couple of rookies.
All right, let's hear it.
It's my first day on the beat,
and I'm scared.
Okay.
hope one guy doesn't catch me unaware
yellow black brown
uh they're all the same to me
in what way
I am totally colorblind
they all are a shade of cream
what the fuck
what What?
They are.
To this rookie cup, everyone's the same, Scott.
It's his story, we should.
It's his story.
Nobody who's not white is the same.
Is that the same?
Everyone's the same color of cream to him.
I've got to hear the chorus.
I've got to hear the chorus.
What about the pre-chorus?
And the bridge.
Don't forget the pre-channel.
Take it to the pre-chorus.
Turn it, babe.
This does have a pre-chorus, actually.
It goes minor.
Oh,
there's a man
looking at a car
like he wants to steal it.
Right in front of this cop?
Drive it pretty far.
Drive it pretty far.
Wow, that's what you want to do.
Can you steal a car?
Hey there, friend.
Where are you from?
Oh.
Is what I say.
He says, this is my car.
You can't take it away.
And I say,
friend, I am a color blind.
Policeman.
You all are the same to me.
He said, what are you speaking of?
I said, turn around.
I knew it.
I fucking knew it.
The puffs are going on, and I'm taking you downtown.
Okay, all right, Glenn.
All right, Glenn.
That was just the pre-chorus, Scott.
That was the pre-chorus.
All right, well, I mean, Harris wants to hear the chorus, obviously.
Jeez.
And there's like a sing-along portion for everyone at the end.
Yes, the sing-along.
Well, the sing-along portion, everybody knows from my tour because a lot of places we go, they're actually able to do it.
One, two, three.
Jump on in if you know it.
Draw your guns.
Draw your guns.
Okay.
Oh, my God.
Scott's holding his son that says, don't sing.
Yeah, put that down, Scott.
I I beg your pardon.
I just.
Draw your guns.
Draw your guns.
Shoot him in the air.
Let's have a little fun.
Okay, so this is a little whimsical.
This is whimsical.
Yeah, but what happened to that guy?
He passes.
Oh, shit.
Oh, no.
But not at the hands of the cop.
He gets taken downtown.
We don't know what happens to him.
He has an asthma attack.
It's getting me so riled up.
The pre-chorus made me pre-comb.
The problem is, is like, I disagree with your ideology.
Well, you can't disagree with truth, can you now?
But the songs are so
catchy.
True is true.
Yeah.
I can't wait to open for you at the barbecue.
Well, you know, I.
Well, you know, the police are going to be there.
We have,
we're good friends with the police.
I love a police, good police barbecue.
They do not arrest us on our golf courts.
We can drive wherever the fuck we want.
Oh, yeah.
And none of these limitations like seatbelts or uh doors or speed limits or children you can have kids flying out of those things don't matter they're not gonna rest you yeah talk about back to the future where we're going we don't need safety regulations
be a very different movie
that was the end of that movie i know where that was going
So if that's a hit single, what's the B side of that?
Yeah.
Good question, Aaron.
I need the B side.
You know, I'm a B side freak.
Yeah, of course.
Sometimes they're better than the actual A-side.
Well, the B-sides are, you know, I always think you have to look at issues from all sides, don't you?
Oh, okay, so you have something from a slightly different point of view.
So, this is from a different point of view, Scott.
This one is called The District Attorney.
No, no, no.
I don't know that that's a different point of view.
What do you mean?
Just another player in the same way.
Well, Scott, you know,
the district attorney has to defend justice, and that's what this song is all about.
So that's the
play a little bit of it.
Okay.
Let the man work.
We've come to a verdict.
This man is innocent.
Okay.
Oh, sorry.
No, I was happy.
Oh, oh, no.
And by the man I'm talking about Officer Brown.
All right.
I don't like that.
That guy from the other song?
Yeah.
No.
Well, it's a big, it's a big story that all culminates because they said, you know, you can draw your gun for anything, scott isn't that right okay it's a concept album and i respect what you're doing as an artist i appreciate the respect it's like elo's the diary of horror swimp uh something like that yeah
i love elo sounds like scott hasn't heard
come on i definitely have it i don't know that i've listened you bought something you bought physical media and you didn't listen to it yeah shame on you um well uh glenn i mean good luck with the albums oh thank you scott what's the seaside hey
i'm terrified i don't know that we have time for the seaside.
I'm just terrified at how well this album is going to sign up.
I know, yeah.
The album's already doing very well.
It's only on Spotify.
I don't release it anywhere else except the giant discs and Spotify.
Those are my two favorites.
They're going to be on SNL.
They're going to put it in a movie or something like that.
You think you're going to be the soundtrack for some comedy?
Well, it's going to be a soundtrack to Joe Dirt 3.
Oh,
no way.
Is that the one star in Kid Rock?
Well, we can only hope.
I have a big announcement to make today, actually.
What?
Kid Rock has signed on.
Yes, I'm getting to
know.
Kid Rock hosting SNL.
Ladies and gentlemen, musical game.
Musical dance, Glenn Blapinger.
I'm going to come.
I'm going to come.
All right.
Well, guys, before you come, we are running out of time.
We only have time for one final feature on the show.
That is, of course, a little something called Plugs.
I love your plug.
Oh, this is nice.
Glenn Black.
Is this an unreleased track?
Is this an unreleased track?
Dance.
End of song.
Oh,
all right.
Was that Martin Sexton?
I'm not quite sure.
That was a plug theme for Lily by Gordy Brave.
Interesting.
Whoa, who is that?
Man, what is that?
What's he trying to say to her?
Yeah, I'm not going to do it.
Do we want to hear it again?
I think I need to.
All right, let's hear it one more time.
I love your plug.
I love your plugs.
More than Scott love.
Danta.
End of song.
Okay.
Yeah.
More than Scott loves Scott.
I don't know what to say.
I love Pentai.
Well, since this gentleman brought it up, Scott loves Hentai.
There will be Hentai on the duck and the dike reductive car.
Scott has seen.
All right, well, what are we plugging?
Osif Deliboys.
Okay, so here's what's happening.
I shouldn't have come in that hot for something that's not coming out yet.
I'm doing season two of Deliboys.
We start shooting in December.
If you're in Chicago, approach me.
Say, I demand an apology.
You will get one.
owe me an apology?
I will be in the new TED animated series that I don't know when that's coming out.
And I'm also on tour doing stand-ups.
So find me on Instagram at Elite Comedy.
And you promise all the stand-up is X-rated.
Don't bring your grandmother.
Don't bring, I swear to God, you bring your grandmother.
Something's going to happen, but it's going to be outside of comedy.
Okay, great.
Yeah.
And Glenn
Plappinger, sorry.
He's been on the show 42 times.
You are in, I believe, the three-timers three-timers or the four-timers.
Yeah, I think Scott.
Yeah, I think so.
Every time it gets a little bit worse.
Yep.
Is that the name of the album?
Yeah, every time.
Well, that was my last album.
Every time's a little bit worse.
Well, Scott, what do we do?
What's this part?
Plugs?
Yeah, plugs, yeah.
Oh, great.
Well, Scott, you know, I will plug a new thing that I'm working on.
It's down at a podcast now that you.
It has a podcast now.
I know.
And
it's a comedy and trivia podcast.
It's called Like Minds.
And we do a live show at the Upright Citizens Brigade that you've been on, and
you almost forgot to show up to the show because you texted me from a nap that you had just woken up from 20 minutes.
20 minutes before the show.
I believe what happened was I woke up and then
I
said to my wife, Do you want to watch whatever tonight?
Deli boys.
She said, You have a show in 20 minutes.
Well, you're not a nut person, it's gone.
But it's a great show that we have a lot of dedicated people doing now.
And yeah, I think that's next week's time.
I still crushed it.
You did crush it.
You did.
And this month it's on September 11th, so folks won't forget about it.
Okay.
And
it's got John Gabris, Will Hines,
Aaron Keith, and Arden Maureen on it, I believe.
Oh, it's actually.
It's in a couple of days here.
Yeah, so everyone should go check that out.
So go check that out.
And you can live stream that show or listen to the podcast.
Very fun.
Okay, fantastic.
And the Boat Boys.
What do you guys want to plug?
Boat Boys.
Boat Boys.
Take it away, McGarf.
Obviously, we want to plug our barbecue on Date Redacted.
We want to plug
Shim Creek.
We want to plug.
Shirk.
It needs to be plugged shit.
We want to plug Dolphin Blowholes.
Okay.
We want to plug other holes.
Now,
CBB World Scott, we've been enjoying it out there listening to
top-tier subscribers.
Hey, Randy, this book changed my life.
Going deep.
And all that other good stuff that's on there.
And then, of course,
Rachel Sennett's new show.
I love LA.
HBO.
HBO Max.
Name a Mora
iconic.
Max.
HBO Max.
HBO.
Name Amora Iconic Troyo.
And of course, what else are we plugging McGarth?
I mean, Harris.
You go first.
I said you go first.
I don't know that I have any...
Do I?
Well, no, that's about it from me for a while.
Okay.
What about you, Harris?
Who cares?
Whoa.
Is that a new podcast?
I'm plugging the universe.
Oh, I love that.
It continues to expand.
Wow.
Relentlessly entertaining.
Cut your cable cord.
Well, I want to plug.
Look, we have new action figures.
We have Italiano Jones and we have Entre P.
Neur.
And you can order those now.
They're shipping out this month.
You can get those at shop.figurecollections.com.
Also, go to action figureseller.com for international purchases.
You know where to get these.
And also, I believe there are still some Randy Snuts and Carissa figures that people can get.
So go check those out.
And then also head over to cbbworld.com and you can hear all of our stuff.
You can hear ad-free episodes of Comedy Bang Bang, all the archives, all the live episodes.
You can hear the aforementioned Scott hasn't seen.
I believe you're coming back on to talk about what movie was it?
Manchester by the the Sea 2.
The fans will remind us, I believe.
The fans will remind us.
Also, you think I should go on SNL to be Zoran Mumdani?
Yeah, you probably should.
All right.
Well, I'm glad I got that out there.
Okay, I'm going to ask you.
Yeah, you're probably
one of those cast members who gets cast just for that, and then they'll have to put you in other sketches.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Should I go on as Andrew Cuomo?
Yeah, probably, yeah.
The two of you on together?
Zoran Mumdami.
Andrew Comdominum.
Andrew Cuomo.
Not even my
Connor Duo.
Anyway, head over to cbbworld.com.
You can get everything there.
All right, let's close up the old plug bag.
Open up the closet.
We all have bags real tight.
They need some clothes and we need these bags
because we're nosing.
That in these bags are lots of plugins.
Just grab the piece of thread
and tie it up real tight.
All right.
That was,
who was that?
That was
Pump Up the Plug Bag Louder by Evaser.
Really, good stuff.
Good stuff.
Gosh.
And that sounded a lot like you, Glenn.
I know.
It did.
Yeah, you're ripping up my thing off, Scott.
Ben Schwartz's voice sounds a lot like yours.
You really should do it.
You know, people have said also Adam Scott.
Oh, really?
People have said that about me and Adam Scott.
Really?
So maybe you and I have the same voice.
Maybe.
Well, throw it in AI and put some tits on it.
Hey, don't mind if I do.
That could be our new motto, by the way.
Really?
Comedy Bang Bang We Care for all this year, but throw some tits on it.
Right.
Well, guys, I want to thank you so much, Osuf.
Wonderful that we've mended fences here.
Resolution.
Turned our swords into plowshares,
as it were.
And
I'll see you out there on January 6th.
Absolutely.
And
Glenn, I'll probably be seeing you.
And then also the boat boys.
I'll be seeing you.
Yeah, we're all be there.
Absolutely.
We bless you with two hard ropes, Scott.
There you go.
We're covering you.
Thank you so much.
We'll see you next time.
Thanks.
Bye.
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I'm going to put you on, nephew.
All right, huh.
Welcome to McDonald's.
Can I take your order?
Miss, I've been hitting up McDonald's for years.
Now it's back.
We need snack wraps.
What's a snack wrap?
It's the return of something great.
Snack wrap is back.