Wade Lied To Us

This episode of Distractible is presented by Vitamin Water.

Some drinks are fun, some are functional, but vitamin Water said, why not both?

There is nothing more refreshing than like a nice vitamin water, ice cold sip in the heat.

I only drink zero sugar drinks, so of course I'm a fan of the zero sugar rehydrate pineapple passion fruit.

I'm a big pineapple guy.

Pineapple good.

Born in New York City, built for people who work hard and play hard.

Grab a vitamin water today, copyright 2025, Glasso.

Vitamin Water is a registered trademark of Glasso.

Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractible, this episode.

Warmest Wade accepts his decrepitude via Star Wars, then callously grills the guys.

Blistering Bob gets a grow-up, continues with Carl, rips Rhapsody, and goes mild.

Minority report Mark bashes black balls and holes, duels bears, cancels cookabits, and rejects the high seas.

From picking bones to bro-bushwhacking,

it's time for

Wade lied to us.

Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Distractible.

I'm today's host, Wade, joined as always but my co-host, Mark and Bob.

Hello boys.

Hello boy.

Hi.

Boy singular does not sound good when i say i there's no context when the boy that's why you have to add the word good first you say good boy or good girl do it boy love that no people love that also bad context well i was gonna say more to the audience but i guess i'll just let you all jump into small talk that's said my bit oh okay you barely you didn't say anything what are we doing nah we got this no i don't need you we're doing an episode

i don't need you bad boy

stages of something you just went through there are some stages.

All right, so I got some.

I'm going to pick a bone with people.

Oh, okay.

You know, I said the Black Magic with

the dial thing.

Someone was like, hey, Black Magic makes this other device that's also a dial, and it's like a singular thing.

And I'm like, I know about that one.

And it's not...

It's not the same thing.

It's actually weirdly enough that there's another one where the little dial, but it's a recorder.

So it takes in video and it converts it so that's what that is for and it's to be why does it have a dial because it's used they have separate uh like departments right they have their video editing software and stuff and supports that and then they have most of their business which is live production so they have uh audio switchers video switchers like huge racks uh products based on that and that is for that to control the video coming in so you can quickly you know scrub through it for live uh mixing i think maybe it has the ability to be used in DaVinci, but that's more expensive than the thing I bought.

And I don't like to buy things that might work.

I don't see a single review saying it works with DaVinci.

I have not found anything in the documentation that works with DaVinci.

So I'm like,

just because it has a dial,

everyone thinks I'm dumb because they're like, I lose this thing.

It's got a circle on it.

I'm like, I look into things a little bit.

I'm not so stupid that i miss it rent it instead of buying it rent it

rent it then mail it right to your pox oh yeah yeah yeah yeah for sure god i miss stores

so much but i seriously no i know like i i'm with you a little bit i lived oh in a place where that we didn't have a micro center for like a decade there weren't stores that had the shit that i wanted even when it was only in stores anyway every time i've ever needed anything specific for computer stuff, or like I've never lived in a town where there was like a BH photo, like you have to have the right store for the kind of shit that you and occasionally I am trying to buy.

It's not like Best Buy used to have the Black Magic editing special thing, and now it's like, oh, Best Buy only sells Phillips Hugh and TVs.

It used to have real technology.

No, it didn't.

It's just always been a pain to get that shit.

Radio Shack.

Radio Shack, huh?

Radio Shack had stuff that needed to be soldered to other things, which was cool, but was also not the kind of electronics I was into.

Are they still in business, Radio Shack?

No, they don't.

They don't died.

No, no, they're still around.

No, permanently closed.

The brand, I don't know if it exists or not, but like the stores are definitely dead.

And if they exist, they're one of those, like, like how Bed Bath and Beyond got purchased or whatever, but it's going to be an online-only retailer or something.

Circuit City also gone.

Anyway, oh, I told you when you talked about that too, I was like, I've seen a thing, Mark.

I've seen that exact thing.

Yeah.

I found the thing that I thought I saw.

It is for that purpose, but it does not have a big fit, a big nice dial on it.

It has like a little knob that you use to scrub.

It's one of those like one-hand creator

macro pad type deals.

And I found it and I was like, this is that thing.

Oh, it's not what I said it was at all.

yeah I

this won't help I can't explain how much better it is because I've been keyboard mouse my entire life like all using computers there was a brief moment when I was first gaming my dad had uh one of those like you know fighter joystick joysticks yeah and that was great when I played like this early X-Wing game But even then, after that, it was only compatible with that one game.

I got so used to mouse and keyboard that even like controllers, I don't really like to do, except for very specific thing.

Like Elden Ring, I'll play on a controller um and some platformers but having a different control surface for editing is completely novel for me i used to scrub through footage with my mouse and i'd just be like you know

yeah

but having a dial that i can change the speed on the fly is it's not revolutionary it's not it's not at all revolutionary editors have been doing

four decades it's so nice and i'm like wow what else have i missed out on in terms of control schemes so yeah i want to get closer to the minority report but i'll stick with the dial if i can get it or if anyone out there can invent the minority report way of scrubbing through things.

Can't you use iMovie in your Vision Pro and edit it?

It's called iMovie.

It must be good for making movies.

You could minority report that bitch all over the place.

Or maybe it means iMove, like iMovie while I edity.

I can see them doing that selling point on the stage.

Yep.

Don't you have phones?

I think.

No, I'll save it.

Bob can go.

I got more

small talk.

Mark's got such spicy stuff.

He's bottling it up right now.

Oh, wow.

Is my episode not good enough for your small talk?

I've tried to spice up your episode.

Make it the best episode ever.

We'll have my great small talk.

Bob will be here.

And then your great episode.

Some shade.

No, what shade?

Just because we're glowing so bright doesn't mean that his shade is worse.

We talked about that in the shadow episode.

Yeah, is it shadow or is it absence of light?

Who knows?

Anyway, my small talk is kind of the same, but it's just more of the same stuff.

Look at my lights.

They're different now.

There's a light over there that's new, and these are different colours.

Well, this one's new, but old, and this one's a different color.

It's

lights.

I really like your lighting setup right now because you've always had the purple, but that splash of crimson pink, like red pink in the cubby there, is awesome because it's so isolated that it creates its only its own little local light zone.

And then your your your your board of habits the habit whatever that was called it's so great because it looks like a city like um skyscraper in the background it has a very nice aesthetic and my pile of trash i can't even tell that it's trash it looks intentional it's so well lit it looks beautiful

yeah and i like the half yellow like but with a strong purple hitting it from the side there's a huge purple flood off the camera over here which is where all of the purple is coming from and it's hitting it so strong it looks like it's a two color lamp which i've never seen it's super cool yeah for all the listeners out there

man why do you even have eyes if you're not going to be able to see this you might as well get two ice cream scoops and get rid of those i apologize to any listener that is blind

look I think we all know you didn't mean that.

And also, Mark's a pretty hateful jerk anyway.

No, I,

yeah, well, that, honestly, I don't think there's any higher compliment I could seek in life than to have Mark say that he likes my lighting because Mark is Mark is a tastemaker.

As far as I'm concerned, not that I'm

in the know, but you always have really good lighting and interesting lighting and you have fairly strong opinion.

It's like if when you say like something sounds really good, I'm like, oh my God.

If Mark, whoa, fuck, if Mark likes the way that sounds, that must be the best sounding thing that's ever made sound.

Yeah, my background looks like plain Jane by comparison at the moment.

So you're doing real good.

Wade, yours is beautiful.

You look great, bud.

You look great.

Very evenly lit.

Look at you.

And I finished book three of Dungeon Crawler Carl.

I'm sure everyone will be so excited to know.

I've reached the point with the series where I looked into it, and apparently Seth McFarlands production company owns the rights to make like a TV series or like a streamer series of Dungeon Crawler Carl, which is exciting.

And also, I'm researching hardcover collectible sets of this book series, which I don't own a single one of for anything else in existence.

I do own a collectible set of DVDs for, or Blu-rays, for Westworld and for Top Gear.

And this would be like the third thing ever where I felt so strongly about it that I was like, I'm never going to use these, but I want to own these books and put them on a shelf.

Perhaps one of these shelves.

So I'm still still pretty excited, and I'm about to start the fourth book, and I'm pretty jazzed about it.

But that's like the same stuff I've been talking about.

I feel like nothing new has happened.

My brother's 30th birthday party was this past weekend.

Oh, and we did.

You remember my 30th, Mark, where we did the go-karts?

Did you come out for that, Wayne?

I don't remember why, but I wasn't able to make it.

I think I was out of town or I was traveling or something, but I do remember you did invite me.

We did that for my brother's 30th, but these were even faster, even more dangerous go-karts.

Nice.

And I'm six years older now than I was then.

And I was like, oh, like, I'm not skinny still.

So I was like, oh, I hope I'll fit.

And we got there and the go-karts were really big because they're fucking fast.

And I was like, ah, sick.

I'll definitely fit.

And then we got out on track.

And literally the first corner, I was like, full speed.

I have to win.

And the first long corner, I was like,

I'm going to fall out.

Oh, I'm going to die.

I'm going to break in half.

I have never done something that was so physically painful that I actually was like, I need a break.

I'm going to go to.

Holy fuck.

So it was still fun, but it was a lot more terrifying than I remember.

And I think they were actually fast, substantially faster than the ones that we did.

So it's crazy.

That is the feeling it was like when you rode Son of Beast, whenever that roller coaster was at Kings Island.

You would go around a corner and it's like, I am going to split into two.

That's the best I can relate to that feeling was riding that roller coaster.

That was good times.

Fun stuff.

So I guess something else did happen in my life.

Sorry.

But Mark said he had something so crazy he wanted to put it off till after I said my boring shit.

I'm going to make him wait one more moment because I'm going to share my less exciting news before Mark takes off.

I can't go after that.

This is something I don't think we've ever talked about on here, but I am getting older.

I had a moment.

My nephew came over.

My nephew came over and

we were going to play basketball, but the weather was kind of meh or whatever.

So instead, we came inside.

He's a big Star Wars fan.

So we went through and we started watching some of like the Star Wars fan-made stuff that's come out over the last 10 years, which I don't know if you guys have watched.

There's some crazy, awesome fan-made Star Wars content.

And we came across a channel, and I was like, oh, there's a new show.

It looks like they have a trailer for a new Star Wars show coming out next year.

Oh, there's a couple of them.

Let's watch these.

And I watched like three or four of these trailers.

I was like, man, I can't believe all these shows I hadn't heard of are coming out next year.

And my nephew's like, Uncle Wade, I think this channel is lying to you and you've taken the bait.

I was like, what?

What do you mean?

They have Disney plus and the thumbnail how can they be lying to me

did you get ai'd i'm pretty sure i got fooled oh no as someone whose job is making content on the internet i took the bait i took the book

oh yeah it's good shit and they reeled me right in that's tough i was pretty ashamed of myself that i had to be told that it was fake content somehow you jump generations you're getting so old i don't even know what happened yeah he did say he said earlier something about, you know, we said we were in the dark and then he went stone ages.

You know, he always makes little references that are just a bit farther back than we are.

I wonder if I'm so old I've forgotten how old I really am.

I think I'm in one age.

We are better than him.

You're right, Mark.

Listen to what I said.

That's not what I said.

It's what I meant, but it's not what I said.

Another one of you are getting points for being addicted to me.

I picked up the implication.

All right, Mark, set the world on fire.

Now we've built this up.

I'm still

it's crazy.

No, no, no.

There's actually, I forgot what I was really going to talk about, so I had to think of something else.

Sorry.

There was debate.

There was debate.

Debate online after they heard the Chica story, charging a bear and whatnot.

And some people were talking about me saying I'm going to throw down with a bear barehanded for my dog, right?

And there was some debate about whether they would do that, right?

You're going to fight 100 bears?

Yeah, actually.

You got 100 bears over there?

Look,

it's not that I want to.

I just, you know, it seems like a good test.

We can.

We're distractible.

We can, we can get 100 bears.

But it was one of those things where some people were saying that, yes, of course, I would do anything for my dog, but that's unrealistic.

And I recognize that because there's certain scenarios where there's that

lake in

Yellowstone that's super acidic, right?

It looks...

like fine, it's a little steaming, but it's actually super boiling water, right?

And there's someone's dog went in there thinking it was a lake, and you know, they're it's horrible.

And this guy ran in after his dog to get it, and he died as well.

Like, both, it, there are cases where it's not intelligent to do these things where you're like, I would do anything for my dog.

But at the same time, I just want to say it's not always an intelligent decision to make because in the moment, I only had enough time to set my blueberries down.

I didn't have any further critical thinking than that.

Then there's a bear and Chica.

And I don't want Chica to fight a bear.

I don't want Chica to die from a bear.

So I'm going to go.

I've never fought a bear.

I'm not saying I can take on a bear.

I'm just saying that's what I would do.

And that's where I was.

So I just want everyone to know.

I'm not saying you are worse than me or I am better than you because I went charging after a bear for the dog.

That's just my instinct.

I don't think I would win against a grizzly bear.

I think I would win against a black bear.

I'm not going to lie.

I'm not going to lie.

I think I could take this black bear.

I think I could take me and Sheikah together.

She'd be like kind of a bitch.

Like a

little beta black bear, you know what I'm saying?

Not like an alpha grizzly bear or like a sigma polar bear, you know what I'm saying?

But, you know, I think I could have taken it on.

But not

always great decisions happen in the moment, but we all just do what we can.

Would you guys do that for your dogs?

No.

Intellectually?

No, I would probably make that choice.

But in the moment, I know exactly what you're talking about because I've done way stupider stuff.

There was when I've told this story, I think, when I was in law school, it was a cold day and my car was a stick shift.

And so I had to put it in neutral to start it.

And it was like iced over.

So I put it in neutral, left it hanging on the handbrake on a very slight hill and was like scraping the window.

And my handbrake broke.

So my car just started rolling down the hill.

Any outside observer would be like, ooh, that's bad.

But in the moment, I was like, I could stop it.

And I, a human person, ran behind my car and was like,

and like, it's a miracle I didn't get run over and killed by my own idling car that I was warming up on an icy day.

And it's not because it was a smart thing to do, but it's because in the moment I was like, oh, it's going to hit the other cars.

I'll save them.

And it wasn't even for a dog or a living, like, it was for something stupid.

And I still made that choice.

So yeah, I probably would in the moment, like you're saying, if it happened in front of me and Lexi was like charging, I I would be like, ah, fuck, and run and I'll save you and then die to the bear if we actually had to fight it.

But like,

I would do that.

I could see that totally.

Shit.

In the moment, maybe, like, my brain's like, God, no, of course not.

I'm like, I love you, but nothing I can do.

Hey, don't be afraid to look like a weenie.

Don't be afraid to look like a little wimp.

That's all I can do.

Like, I love me.

I love being alive.

I love having my appendages.

I really like being whole.

I don't have any intent of like going and getting mangled for anything else.

But like, there have been times where our dogs have like charged off in the woods and i don't see what they're seeing it could be a coyote it could be anything and i go running right after like i have done that so would i in the moment maybe what if it had been a bear maybe you already did i can only hope i have some kind of food in my hand to distract me like mark did with the blueberries otherwise i'd be right in there

my priorities are food being alive, being whole, and then everyone else.

Damn.

Anyway, just wanted to throw that out.

That wasn't what I was originally saying.

I forget what it was at all.

I'm tired.

Okay, well, you got Mark thinks he's better than you because he would take on a bear point.

I think you were just addressing that people thought you were like crazy for going after the dog.

And there was the debate about, well, if you wouldn't save your dog,

you're a morally bankrupt part.

It was, you were just sort of addressing it, I think.

And I think it's a fair point because I don't think anyone knows what they're going to do if the situation actually arises where your dog, your friend, your whatever child is suddenly facing a bear, and you have about half a second to decide what you're about to do.

Help them do nothing, whatever.

Like, it's hard to say what you're going to do because you don't exactly get to think it all the way through in that situation.

Even in my brain, I'm like, ah, even a kid, it's like, my kid's still young.

I don't know how they're going to turn out.

I know I'm great.

I can make more kids, but if I die,

goddamn.

That's why I'm not a parent.

That's a good call, it sounds like.

Yikes.

You made the right choice.

I'm gonna give myself a rebel point.

I bet he's gonna get points for insulting you.

Whenever I insult you, I don't get points.

It's because there's a bias.

There's obvious and structured bias built into the show.

It all somehow flows towards me.

I benefit from all of it.

You're right.

You're right.

Even I'm agreeing with you.

That's the bias.

The bias is built in.

You're the nice one.

Oh, the nice one.

You can't not agree.

I'm the nice one.

I'm the nice one.

Oh, you know what?

You know what else is funny?

That's totally unrelated to anything we were talking about.

God, I'm so distracted.

Ah, so eBay is really funny, right?

So funny.

I go there to laugh all the time.

So I've been on there for computer parts, right?

Because that's what I've been doing.

And I was curious.

I was curious about, I haven't looked up lenses in a while.

So maybe I'll look up.

There was always this 400 millimeter that I was never able to get my hands on.

I wonder if it's there.

And I do one search and I'm like, I didn't find it.

Next time I open eBay, it's floor to ceiling lenses.

Like, he's back.

He's stuck in the lens.

Oh, here, here, here, here, here.

It's every single suggestion of lenses.

And it was not this.

Just one search prior.

So, anyways, it's very funny.

Now that you've even mentioned it, every website's going to be covered in lenses.

Yeah.

Just further proof of the simulation, really.

Unless you all have anything else, I do have an episode prepared.

Me, like I do.

That's kind of crazy, huh?

Oh, you all, you

yeah, do you show up a lot without episodes prepared and just lie to us?

So the episode

that's for me to know and you to find out.

We've done like personality quizzes, and I have something similar.

I've edited it slightly myself, but I've got like two individual quizzes.

but we'll kind of do simultaneously but i'll give one of you a question the next one i'll get a completely different question because they're individualized questions

easy questions yeah yeah they're really easy actually oh okay

well no not like i see what you're saying ah

i understand what you're saying no no they're simple to answer questions oh they're simple questions okay

but i didn't want to just give like one of you a quiz and the other one a quiz so that's why i'm going to kind of mesh it because it seemed weird to anyway questions i have questions for you they are easy questions but by that i mean they're just easy questions they're not actually difficult yoke man we're good we got it we're on the same page simple to answer questions yeah you seem so nervous i am nervous i have to read my own handwriting you could type stuff i could but i wasn't at my computer whenever i was doing my edits and you remember what happened last time his idea list was purged by the windows that's true Yeah, I got a lot of flack for using whatever that word pad, I think it was.

I got a lot of flack for using WordPad.

wordpad still exists i think you're using notepad maybe that's what it was or maybe vice versa no yeah wordpad notepad still exists yeah wordpad is gone which is so dumb but whatever we talked about that already like like an idiot using wordpad i have bob your first question up first so you're gonna go first here first got it if you had to sing karaoke what would be the song If I had to sing Karaoke, is there any more context to it?

You're at a karaoke place.

You're put on the spot.

You have to sing a karaoke song.

There is no getting out of it.

No avoiding it.

You are going to do this.

What is the song?

If it hasn't been sung recently enough that I can get away with it, I will always select Bohemian Rhapsody.

That's a crazy one to karaoke.

That's bull.

I like it because the audience likes to sing with you on that one.

Okay.

It's rare.

I feel like if you're at a karaoke bar, especially if people are drinking, it's rare that that comes on and like half the room isn't just like, oh, yeah, and then they sing with you and it's like, it doesn't really matter how good I am at singing necessarily.

We're all just like, we're doing the Wayne's World bit, right?

And it's fun.

It's a good song.

I went down, I think I talked about this on the podcast.

I went down a queen rabbit hole where I was watching so many of their live performances.

Everyone talks about LiveAid.

Live Aid is the big famous live performance they did, but their like 1981 Montreal concert.

Some of like the songs they perform there are my favorite version of a lot of their songs.

Like some songs of theirs, I don't even really care for, but then I see that live and I'm like, this is now one of my favorite songs.

So, I've actually added songs from that show to my playlist because I just love it so much.

Wow, were you hearing the sirens coming through on my end?

Yeah, was that from you, Mark?

Yeah, yeah.

So, I don't know why it was so loud, but that was like right outside this window.

And if you know what's outside this window, it's not a road.

Yeah, no, I do know what's outside that window.

That doesn't make any fucking sense.

Yeah, I don't know either.

That was very loud.

Yeah, there's just a person walking around with a loudspeaker and like their phone,

Anyway, that's interesting.

I definitely like live performances, but I don't know if I've ever had that experience where I've, I listened to a recording from a live performance and was like, this is even better than the studio version.

Go watch specifically the song Somebody to Love from Montreal in 81.

That song specifically live is, I don't know, it's just amazing.

So am I smart or how does this work then?

I answered your question.

I've got to get more through more than one before there's a result.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Mark, what is your least favorite vegetable?

Oh, I don't get the...

Oh.

You get different questions.

Oh, man.

Oh.

These are two different.

He has an answer all ready to go.

I was so ready.

I was so...

Sweet Caroline.

I was like,

I'm so ever.

All right.

What was it?

Some stupid fucking vegetable thing?

What's your least favorite vegetable?

Some stupid goddamn fucking vegetable bullshit.

Oh, yeah, all right.

I'm sorry, man.

I'm sorry.

That's the question you got.

Okay, all right.

I know this one.

I know this one.

I know this one.

That's good.

It's very personal.

I know this one.

Any type of squash.

I don't know what it is.

I don't like the squash.

Any type.

Don't like it.

Don't like the zucchini.

I don't like the squash.

I don't like whatever else thinks it's a squash.

Butternut, acorn, pischetti, none of them.

This is a spaghetti squash?

You never had spaghetti squash.

Oh, the psychopaths that think that you can cut up an eggplant and say, it's a string, it's spaghetti.

No, no, no, no, no.

Spaghetti squash is a kind of squash.

Okay.

You roast it, you roast it in the oven, like cut it in half and roast it.

And then when it's cooked, when you just like take a fork and try and get the meat out, it comes out into like strings because of the way that the fibers in the squash naturally occur.

So it's, yes, it's the same thing that you're talking about where it's like, it's a, it's spaghetti, but it's vegetables, but it's a, it's not a manufactured thing.

It's the type of squash that does that.

Oh, okay, I see.

I probably still wouldn't like it, but because it's combination, like the flavor's fine, it's basically nothing, but it's a texture thing and it's an idea thing and its name is bad.

And food is like, you know, nine-tenths preparation, you know, and how it's presented.

And it presents itself poorly is what I'm saying.

If it got its shit together and started presenting itself with like some dignity and grace, then maybe I would give it the time of day.

But as it is right now, I don't give a shit about it.

Worst vegetable.

If it is a vegetable, it might be one of those things masquerading as like a root or a fruit or something like that.

Yeah, well, they grow underground, right?

Or no,

they grow above ground, but they grow in vines.

What is a squash?

What kind of thing is a squash?

It's probably some kind of a fruit.

It's like the same thing as a pumpkin or something like that, but it's all bad.

Well, pumpkin's good.

Pumpkin can stay.

But they have seeds.

it's both a fruit and a vegetable thanks google that's very helpful no i knew it it was one of those oh man pick a side am i right oh god

whoever invented these words to define all this stuff was so stupid

bob what was your favorite cereal as a kid oreo o's

that was when we were little when we were little kids that was a thing where it was like it was like the mcrib It would come and go, right?

And there'd be like, oh, Oreo O's are back for the summer.

And then you like get a box and it's like, oh, man.

Now they're just like on the shelves all the time everywhere.

They're not as, it's not as much of a thing, but still, pretty good cereal.

And I fucking loved them when I was a kid.

I love the Race Krispy Treats cereal.

Do I not get to even participate in this conversation?

Do I, I have something I would love to say.

All right, Mark.

Shut up, Mark.

Shut up.

All right, Mark, your question.

Oh, no.

He's all the fun one.

He's all there having fun.

You know what?

It won't help particip or it won't contribute to your personality quiz, but just tell us, bud.

I'm curious.

What'd you like?

Grape nuts?

Musley?

There's so much.

Mewsly.

Moosely.

Muisley.

Moosely?

Yeah, pretty much.

What was yours, bud?

So I think my favorite was Cinnamon Toast Crunch, but I got a soft spot for kaooky crisps.

Captain Crunch also, just, but occasionally.

It would tear your mouth apart, but man.

No, yeah, it was worth it, though.

Captain Crunch was so good.

I never got into Captain Crunch.

I don't know why.

It had one of those like food qualities, like how like Cheetos melt in your mouth.

It had one of those things where it was like addictive to eat or something, but I couldn't describe it.

Yeah.

The texture worked really well, I think, because it was so crunchy, like so crunchy, and then it softened and it after it cut your mouth to ribbons.

But oh, so good.

Anyway, was my question: which kitchen utensil would you be a fork?

Come on.

It's not even all the kitchen utensils.

It's just a choice between a fork, a knife, or a spoon.

That was my choice.

As soon as I read it, I was like, he's going to fucking hate that.

Those aren't even kitchen utensils.

I would say that's the narrower category of eating utensils.

Yeah.

Alright, I'll be a knife so I can cut anyone who made this quiz.

I'll slice them to ribbons.

And I better be a steak knife and not a goddamn butter knife.

Ooh, I'm sorry.

Only butter knife is left.

All right, Bob, let's do what fun question you can.

Yeah, no, let's talk about more fun, nostalgic stuff on my end.

Let's see this.

I'm here for it.

If you could be fluent in any other language than your native language, which would you choose?

Oh, well, this might be too boring and practical of an answer, but man, I fucking wish I spoke Spanish.

I studied German and I like German and I like, like, it's a fun language, and I, I thought, I don't regret it, but it would be so fucking helpful if I could just speak Spanish.

There are so many people on a day-to-day basis where I'm like, if I could just speak Spanish with you, I think that would help both of us.

And I would love to be able to talk to you more casually as opposed to being like, I don't understand you.

I think you understand me.

and it's my fault that we're not communicating very well this sucks that might be too boring but man i would love to speak spanish i love hearing french i'm spanish i think would be very useful i love hearing french i think german is very interesting mark if you want to contribute i think we might have an idea oh it's even the point you know so it's even the point oh man It'd be Korean, but you know, it'd be pretty cool, but, you know, I'm going to get there eventually, so I guess I could pick another one.

So I have a lot of nuances to this answer.

I could participate in it, but I won't.

all right mark what ply toilet paper would you be one two or

for the fabled four ply let me see if i can actually sub that one in because that's a much better question than that what do you mean that's a much better question what was your dumb question no no you you have this is a good question for you it's a good question i think what job would you be awful at doing uh

well i've had some boring jobs, but I wouldn't say I was awful at them because they were boring and fairly basic.

Man, I don't know.

So good at everything.

I'm just a goddamn paragon of skill.

I don't think I could ever be bad at anything.

Is that an option?

Sure.

You don't have a weakness?

Oh, no, actually.

I think I'm thinking I'm just nothing but strengths.

It's like a job interview.

Yeah.

Your weakness is being too good at everything.

Great artist, great musician, great singer, great architect.

I think I would probably be bad as a playwright or something like that because I would never take it seriously and I would make the actors do really stupid stuff all the time and I would get really poorly reviewed.

I don't know.

Oh, marine biologist.

That's enough.

There's an answer.

I would hate because if I have to go in the ocean at all, I'm not going to have a good time.

If I have anything with underwater, I am having a terrible time.

I'm panicking.

Submarine boat captain.

We would only stay on the surface.

We'd get bombed.

A stealth mission in the Pacific.

I'm not.

What about like the

was it a company or just a dude who had that high-pressure sub that didn't end well?

Check about the ocean gate.

Yeah, would it be worse to be a marine biologist or to have to give tours like that?

I mean, you know, well, not like that, but you know, I don't know why, but I just fucking love the vision of Mark.

He still does YouTube for some reason, and it's just videos.

It's like Let's Play videos, but it's Mark with his Mad Cats PS3 controller plugged into his submarine, and then you just get a front view of the submarine, and he's just like panicking, like, all right, we gotta go, we really gotta get down there, I really need to get, are you guys having trouble breathing?

We need to get back to the surface as soon as possible.

It's a setup very let's play style.

Like, they're in the sub, but I'm in the top corner in a camera, you know, so that's great.

All right, I promised you 20 minutes, and 19 of it was travel time.

Back up.

There's the titanic, there's the front, there's the back.

Let's go to the surface.

Okay.

Bob, what is a word you always spell wrong or incorrectly?

Aesthetic.

I don't even know how to actually spell it.

I I just start typing and hope that Autocorrect finds me and helps me.

A-E-S-T-H-E-T-I-C-A-Aesthetic.

A-E-T-H-E-S-T-I-C.

Is that what you said?

Aesthetic?

Is that correct?

I don't know.

I wasn't following that.

Perfect.

Aesthetic.

I don't even trust it.

Because when I, when I, even when Autocorrect types it, I read it and I'm like, I don't think that's right.

I know there's a word I always spell wrong.

I can't think of what it is off the top of my head, though, but I know whenever I see it and I go to write it on, I'm like, fuck, this is that word.

Millennium?

Maybe.

Gubernatorial?

I don't know.

Never tried to write that one out.

Is that one where it's like gubernatorial?

Yeah, gubernatorial.

It is guober.

Gubernatorial.

Is there an R in there?

There's an R in there.

I had a sneaking suspicion there was an R in there.

Well, that must be why I can't spell it right.

That means governor.

Oh, I guess I see that.

Yeah, it's like the gubernatorial race.

It's the race to be elected as governor.

I've never known that.

Why do they call it?

Why do they call it the...

Did someone misspell V with a B?

It's the gubernatorial.

The governor.

A what?

Gobernier.

The governor.

It's an 18-in-no governor election.

This is why we don't let toddlers write the dictionary anymore.

One person saw that movie Baby Genius and was like, oh, man, no.

And then Boss Baby came out and really confused him.

And I was like, oh, God.

I think babies are smart.

Mark, are you ready for your question?

Oh, come on, man.

You know I'm ready.

Hey, that wasn't that interesting of a question.

Maybe Mark's will be the good one this round.

If you had to bathe in a condiment, which would you choose?

I can't say it's not interesting.

All right, so I actually have bathed in hot chocolate.

I've bathed in mashed potatoes.

Gravy was a small component of that, but I can't say I bathed in gravy.

Which one would actually be good for your skin is what I'm wondering versus which one is going to give you acne, full body acne, clog every pore that you have.

Well, so I don't know if ketchup's a good answer, but I know if you get sprayed by a skunk, like getting in like a tomato sauce bath was like supposedly good for that.

That's because like the acidic nature of tomatoes breaks down the skunk.

Honey is probably good for your skin, right?

It probably is.

Is that a condiment?

But that feels

maybe, okay, this is going to sound strange, but follow me.

Mustard with like a lot of seed, right?

If you know that apricot scrub that they have where it's like got the grit because it's got apricot pits, did they come up and they were like, That's actually bad for you, it tears up your skin?

I can't remember what it was, but then they have those like microderm rollers that are like, Hey, this will puncture your skin a thousand times.

I was like, Didn't you say apricot scrub was bad for you because it cuts up your skin?

It's like, no, this does it orderly.

I don't know, anyway.

Mustard, because unless it burns, which it might, because it would exfoliate at the same time.

I think if you found like a low enough, because the thing about mustard, I think, is it's it's lots of mustards are made with vinegar as one of the main liquid components.

But if you could find like a beer mustard or something where the acid level was a little more tame, because there totally are versions, or like honey mustard or something.

Or Frank's red hot.

I put that shit on everything.

Could put bathe in that.

No, at the moment, I had too hot a hot sauce recently.

And let me tell you, I didn't fully digest.

There was a worse end than my mouth that touched.

Sitting in hot sauce, dude, the taint, taint, the balls, the asshole.

No, no, no.

That's why you gotta start pooping on the toilet wade.

I keep telling you.

Any scratch you have anywhere on a leg the moment it touched the hot sauce, you would know.

No,

no, no, no, no.

Concerns about how you're using the bathroom, but okay.

Unless you're a masochist.

Yeah, all right.

So that's out.

Honey, maybe, I guess, might be.

What about honey mustard?

Oh, it's the perfect best of both worlds.

Is that your final answer?

Yeah, honey mustard.

That's a good idea.

Thank you.

Just combine them all.

Put ketchup, honey, mustard, mayo.

Is there a name for that?

Like all condiments together.

There was a thing with uh, what was it called whenever you put all your drinks together, like the soda drinks?

Being six years old?

Is there a name for that?

I thought there was a name for like the drink where you put a little bit of everything in the cup.

I don't remember.

I'm just thinking of jungle juice, but I don't think that's it.

No, jungle juice is when you take a trash can and fill it with ever clear and Kool-Aid mix.

Do you put fruit on top of that, or is that something else?

Yeah, you float a bunch of orange slices in it and it's terrible.

Bob, this is a real difficult one here.

Coffee or tea?

Is neither an option?

Wait, wait, wait, what is wrong with coffee?

Unless it's made into a milkshake, coffee is gross.

Like, I'm not even going to say that, like, I think I'm right and everyone's wrong.

If you like stuff that's a little more bitter, if you like black coffee or whatever, that's totally fine.

I don't.

I never developed that.

I don't like super hoppy, bitter beers, things like that.

Don't care for it.

The bitterness in coffee just absolutely destroys me.

And unless it's basically a chocolate milkshake with some coffee in it, I don't drink it.

And I could live my entire life without drinking coffee or tea ever again.

Not even be worried about it.

I would pick coffee if I had a gun to my head, but only because I know how to make a coffee that I can stand to drink.

And tea is not very offensive, but I'd rather have the coffee.

Which one would you choose, Mark?

I am curious.

Would you choose coffee or tea?

I like very specific teas and only for when I'm sick.

Coffee, I'll drink every day, but I agree.

Coffee black, you're just putting yourself through unnecessary stuff.

I don't like sugar in coffee.

I don't like the sweetness, but I still love my coffee milkshake like Bob's talking about.

That's very good.

But just with a little cream to cut the sweetness, it's like that's very good.

I didn't have a cup of coffee today because I slept in and I was trying to get in here.

So I'm very looking forward to that cup of coffee as soon as we finish this episode and

part for days and come back and record the second one.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Based on the time, I might have to start speeding this because I might be dragging this out a while.

Mark, favorite movie villain?

Uh oh, hmm.

There's been a lot of good ones.

The ones that springs to mind immediately is

the T-1000 from like Terminator.

Good villain.

Move the plot for it.

Sinestro, nah, he's kind of a whiny

little nerd from the Incredibles.

But sorry, this is going to sound strange, but whatever the name of that

the bird person from Kung Fu Panda 2, what was that guy's name?

For some reason, Kung Fu Panda had a lot of really memorable villains.

I generally do like the villains in those movies.

Yeah, they're very good.

Lord Shen, a peacock who seeks to conquer China and eliminate Kung Fu.

Which is funny because I can't remember a goddamn thing about Kung Fu Panda 2.

I only watched it once, but that guy stands out in my head.

I don't know if it's about the style or like the way he spoke.

I liked the villain from the first one, whatever that guy's name was.

And then the ox from the whatever other one was okay.

Dude voiced by What's His Face?

Dude Voice.

Oh, fuck.

What's his name?

Oh, Tempo Guy.

The Lemons.

That's the guy, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

From Whiplash.

Yeah.

I'll burn your house down with the Lemons.

What's the fuck's his name?

What is his name?

It's not John Cleese.

That's a different guy.

No.

Shannon Simmons.

Simmons, something Simmons.

J.K.

Simmons.

J.K.

Simmons.

Yeah, but for some reason, Kung Fu Pan has a lot of really good villains.

You're not wrong.

T-1000 is a good.

My first thought's always Darth Vader.

I think Darth Vader in the original trilogy was true.

That's true.

I feel like mine's a weird choice.

Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg from the fifth element.

Zorg Industries.

He's Gary Oldman's character from the fifth element.

He's not the main bad guy.

It's not the like planet, the pure evil thing in space, but he's the like the corporate bad guy in the movie.

He's funny, but he's also a legit villain.

But also, he's a secondary villain.

He's just like a good character.

Gary Oldman's got some great range.

Gary Oldman just fucking kills it.

Yeah, he's just really good.

What's interesting about that character is there's a lot of movies that have futuristic styling that I think is stupid.

And like, that's never, ever going to actually be a thing.

But his, his weird piece of plastic on his head, I look at that and I'm like, that actually doesn't look bad.

And for some reason, I could see that being a thing, especially if it had like some secondary function to it, like it was some kind of weird computer thing of a Bob.

But even if it was just style, like his hairstyling is weirdly good.

And I like it for some reason.

That movie in general, because it's not a high budget, but like the aesthetic that they get in that movie that they pull off is across the board pretty good.

Even though you couldn't, like, it's also not super high-budget.

It's clearly like they'd made do with what they could get, and they didn't.

It's just, I mean, just like the art direction or whatever is like very good, very consistent.

I had a co-worker years ago who I could 100% see having his exact hairstyle, Tyler, right?

Back from the UDF days, yeah, yeah, Tyler, Tyler.

I can see Tyler with the yep, I see it, I see it.

We all see it, Bob.

Vacation to the beach or the mountains?

Oh, mountains.

Not a big beach guy.

Love the mountains.

Cool air.

Maybe some rain.

Maybe some snow.

Beach is too hot.

I get sunburned.

I get itchy.

It's unfortunate because I think every other person in my entire family, except maybe my dad, including like my in-laws and everyone, is like, yeah, beach.

Beach all the way.

So I go to the beach fair amount.

I'm a beach boy.

I'm a mountain dude.

I would rather be in the mountains.

Mountains.

But I don't get a say.

Doesn't matter, Mark.

Shut up.

Come on, and stick to your questions.

Mark, what is the last song stuck in your head?

For some reason, it wasn't stuck in my head, but just as you said that, I got more than one man!

More than a woman to me!

But not because of the song, but because Brian Regan had a small bit.

Isn't the Brian Regan joke?

He's like,

More than one man!

Do you remember the bit?

Because I do, and it's really good.

Yeah, I don't remember the full bit, but maybe we'll see if you can.

It was, he was doing a set.

He was doing a stand-up set, and his wife was there with him.

I think it was his wife or his manager.

And they were up in the booth.

And when comedians come out, they always play a song, right?

And his wife was in the booth.

And the guy running the show was like, hey, does you have a song you want to pick for Brian to come out to or whatever?

Does he have like a preferred?

And his wife was like, I think he likes the Bee Gees.

And so

the punchline of the joke is like the guy introducing Brian.

He's like, next comedian up is a very funny friend of mine.

Ladies and gentlemen, Brian Reagan.

More than a woman.

More than a woman, chubby!

And he

just walks out into that.

Anyway, yeah, that's the last song.

I can't say it was the last song stuck in my head, but it immediately popped in.

I guess right now it's the last song stuck in your head.

Bob, if you could only eat breakfast or dinner, which would you choose?

Is this a time of day thing or just a type of food situation?

No, like if you, if you had to pick one, like, moving forward, if you could only have breakfast or dinner

today.

It would hurt, but there's just so many more options for what dinner can be.

Arguably, dinner could even be kind of breakfast foods, even if it was international breakfast, even if it included things like breakfast from cuisines that I don't normally partake in.

I got to pick dinner.

Mark, would you rather go 48 hours with no sleep or no food?

That's a fitting one for you.

Not that you would ever do anything like this.

Man, I think 48 hours with no sleep because I've done that actually a couple of times now, just in the past week.

But like doing a fasting is torture.

I love food so much.

And I know there are some religions that do fasting.

There's some diets that do fasting is like I've tried intermittent fasting for health reasons and other things.

And I'm just like, man, that period where you can't eat.

Oh,

it's either the Korean in me or the German in me.

And I know they both love food.

And I think just as a human, I just, I'd rather go without sleep than food.

I feel like it's like that human thing, too, where as soon as you put your space helmet on that you can't ever take, you know, you have to have it on for six hours, can't take it off, your nose itches like fucking crazy.

As soon as you hit that time where you're like, all right, I'm not going to eat now for 18 hours or whatever.

Your body's like, oh my God, let's get pizza, bro.

But like, fucking, come on.

Bob, morning or evening shower?

For my entire life until recently, I was a morning shower person.

I would have told you I'd rather wake up and take a shower in the morning.

And I still do like that.

I'm coming around on evening showers.

I like evening showers now.

I don't know what changed.

I think it's because I have more control over my sleep situation.

When I was like a kid and I didn't, like, I didn't always control the thermostat because I was at roommates or in the dorm or whatever.

I'm a sweaty sleeper.

But now that I, like, our house is whatever temperature we collectively choose it as a family, I don't sweat in my sleep.

Turns out that was not a me problem.

That was a temperature problem.

Or maybe it was my sleep apnea because I also have a Mark.

Crackers or chips?

Oh, oh.

Wait, what?

Is this a British thing?

Is this like

talking about French fries or chips?

What is this?

No, no, this is actual like potato chips or like crackers.

Like, I guess a Cheez-It or something.

I don't know.

These are not thing.

They're different types of things.

Okay, so specifically potato chips versus the wide, wide world of crackers.

I would have to say crackers because there are so many different varieties.

If you have to pick between the two and only getting potato chips, immediately they could have a flavor versus crackers, which is different grains and da-da-da-da-da-da.

da da you could also have corn chips there's a lot of potato chips too like doritos and stuff like that yeah yeah those are not made of potatoes those are made of corn well he said potato chips did he he said chips he said potato chips did you i said like potato chips not not specifically potato chips this includes all types of chips oh okay if it's chips versus crackers it at least has to be all chips because there's only a few kinds there it's not specific to potatoes okay then i changed my answer and i would say chips because i couldn't do without tortilla chips.

Potato chips are fine.

Tortilla chips because, you know, Takis are tortilla chips.

General, Mexican restaurant tortilla chips.

There's a lot of versatility you can get out of a chip where it gets close to cracker, but it would probably fall in the chip category versus crackers.

Those are nice, but not as many flavor opportunities, even though they have more texture opportunities.

Plus, cracker flavors are never quite as good.

I know they're supposed to be different products, but what if they took Doritos powder and just put it on crackers?

Would that be so bad?

I don't think it would be as good.

All the crackers where it's like it's sour cream and onion-flavored crackers.

No, it's not.

Maybe if you'd never had them on Doritos, but like, I feel like our brains have that crunch prepared in our mind where if we had it on like a chewier thing, because crackers are typically they have a crunch, but I feel like that'd be cool.

You've ever had a Doritos locos taco that sat in the bag for 20 minutes too long?

You're talking about it, they get kind of soft.

I like it, it's fine, whatever, not important.

We're hurrying up, Bob.

Favorite superhero?

None of them.

Who deserves my affection?

My answer for this one's the same still, but it's Batman.

Because he knows super.

He just dude.

I really struggle between Batman and Superman.

Recently, I'm still more Batman, but like as a kid, I really loved both.

And there was like that Spider-Man show.

The Batman animated series was amazing.

And Spider-Man had its own show that I really liked to watch.

And I don't know.

Worst place to take a vacation.

The beach.

Final answer.

No.

Middle of a war zone.

Bottom of the ocean.

All terrible options for vacations.

In a black hole, in inside-out world.

I don't want to be there again.

Terrible places for vacations.

Escalator Land.

You know, had a lot of hype.

Very boring.

I guess pick one.

Oh, definitely escalator land.

Sounds fun.

It's so boring.

They're slow escalators.

I like an escalator.

Curious to see how this works because I was thinking it would be like a...

You know what?

What's your answer?

Not Escalator Land.

Because, you know, I've seen some long escalators.

They've always been fun, it has some ups and downs.

He did it.

You know, I try so hard at these games, and then Wade's going to come in here with his incredible jokes, and he's going to just

supersede me.

I thought we were the participants here.

How am I supposed to compete with that?

You can give me a fucking answer.

That's how you can compete.

Oh, man.

All right.

I'm going to say

bottom of the ocean, or if someone invited you on that submarine that exploded as a vacation, which I think one of them did, that'd be bad.

Spicy food or mild food?

It's a terrible answer, but I got to go mild.

Oh, boo.

I am sensitive to spicy, and I would never complain and not eat something that was too mild, but I definitely have ordered and then not been able to eat something that was too spicy, and I'm just not a spicy food person.

Boo!

I'm guessing Mark would go spicy.

Because if they're both of spice so I'd rather have the spicier one and I have had overspice but it's like still would rather have the opportunity for that kind of flavor enhancement.

I would also lean mild but uh it's it'd be hard to have no spo.

Yeah, it'd be hard to say no to spice.

Um Mark have to choose between sweet or salty for the rest of your life.

Which do you choose?

Salty, I think, but yeah, salty.

I'd rather do salt.

Because even though they say like, you know, salt raises your blood pressure, didn't they say it doesn't know anymore?

Didn't they didn't science actually kind of deduce that it wasn't really

complicated?

The answer is that salt is related to the system that involves whether your blood pressure goes up and down, but it has more to do with water retention in a hole in your lymph system and things.

And salt definitely impacts that.

But look at the boat.

It's stupid.

The answer, as per usual, is they don't fucking know.

Yeah, the human body's complicated.

Whoa,

no way.

Unless that's not the answer, in which case, I don't know, which I'm willing to admit.

I hope salt is not bad for blood pressure and whatnot, because I love salt.

So, I don't know.

Saying goodbye to sweets forever would be real tough.

I could say goodbye to sweets forever.

I could do that.

I could not.

I don't think as a human, because you can live without sweets.

You can live, have a totally normal life without sweets.

I don't think you can live a normal life without salt.

And I'm not saying like highly salt salt foods.

I guess it says sweet or salty food.

It doesn't say like no salt, a salty food.

Either way, I think I would be a lot less happy if I didn't have salted foods than with sweet foods.

Yeah, I couldn't live without any sweet, but if I'm still allowed to have like fresh fruit level of sweetness,

I'm okay.

I could live with that as opposed to the inverse.

That is the last question.

So which one of us has a better personality?

Go.

Uh-huh.

I forgot we were doing that.

I don't know.

Because what I'm going to do here is I'm going to go back through and ask you guys each other's questions if you remember each other's answers.

Oh,

it is an easy question thing.

It's easy.

I knew it.

You guys will get this.

There weren't that many questions.

I think you got this.

Okay.

All right.

Mark, what is Bob's go-to karaoke song?

Bohemian Racity.

Good.

Bob, what is Mark's least favorite vegetable?

Squashes.

Good.

Mark, what was Bob's favorite cereal as a kid?

Oh, it was...

Oh, it wasn't Cookie Chris, because that's what I said.

That was your answer.

That was my answer.

But my answer was related to that one because it was one of those that was also kind of a candy type cereal.

Oh, what was it?

I also have had it and I liked it.

But I was so focused on my own.

It's a really good cereal.

I got to give you a little bit of a timer here.

I bet it was, oh, when I was a child.

And I used to eat cereal when I was, me and my brother would sit in front of that TV, watch an episode of Pokemon, and eat our cereals.

And it was just divine.

Don't you miss those yonder years?

Five, four,

three,

two.

I can't remember.

I'm going to find it.

Final answer.

I don't have it.

I don't know.

Okay.

What are you not going to tell me?

Not yet.

Oh, does it have to go back around again?

That's Oreolos.

It was Oreolos.

Oreolos.

Okay.

All right.

That makes sense.

Yeah.

Bob, if Mark could be a utensil, would he be a fork, knife, or spoon?

He had a knife so he could stab you or or something i think he said mark if bob could be fluent in any other language what would he have chosen spanish for the utility what job would mark be awful at doing none of them but also

probably

uh

uh

oh wait a minute uh it was submarine captain I forget what one you actually said because you said a bunch.

He did say a bunch.

He settled on one.

He didn't make it easy for you because he named like a dozen things, but

a marine, marine biologist.

Good.

This is why you wanted me to name one thing.

What word does Bob always spell wrong?

It's not gubernatorial.

Fuck, why did we keep talking so much?

Aesthetic.

Aesthetic.

A-E-S-T-H-E-T-I-C.

Well done.

Bob, if Mark had to bathe in a condiment, which one would he choose?

Go with me here.

Mustard.

Incorrect.

He settled on honey mustard.

Oh, right.

Because that was the thing I said.

And then, like, a minute later, he was like, wait, I know.

Honey mustard.

I knew that would complicate things over.

You guys would go on spiels.

I was like, this is going to make it real hard on him later, but I'm here for it.

Coffee or tea for Bob?

Well, he said he didn't like coffee unless it was in the shape of a milkshake, but I can't remember if that meant he went for tea.

So I guess I got to go.

He went for tea.

He said neither but coffee.

Oh, man.

what a what a bob answer he really bobbed all over that i give terrible answers for this sort of shit what is mark's favorite movie villain do i remember what i said oh didn't you say oh i forget the number the t100 t1000 t1000 but no he he changed it oh he changed it lord shen ended up being his new answer oh that's right we talked about that i didn't even know his name Mark, would Bob rather go to the beach or the mountains?

Mountains, because I would also.

Beach is dumb.

bob last song stuck in mark's head more than a woman

more than a woman to me

mark would bob rather have breakfast or dinner uh dinner would mark rather go 48 hours with no sleep or no food oh no sleep does it all the time all the time

mark would bob rather have morning or evening shower he used to be a morning guy now he's an evening guy Turns out temperature was a problem.

Bob, crackers or chips?

Oh, it's complicated.

But if we're including tortilla chips, then chips.

Bob's ever superhero.

Well, yours is Superman like a goof.

That's also not true.

Completely wrong.

Oh, yeah, it's Batman because you're typical.

Also, his is Batman.

I said Batman or Spider-Man, but yeah.

You said Batman.

Good thing it's not about what I said.

I thought he said Batman or Superman, so I'm with you, Mark.

He did say those.

Yeah, he didn't say Spider-Man.

Batman or Spider-Man.

You actually didn't say Spider-Man.

Check the tape.

Play the tape, Edwards.

I really struggle between Batman and Superman.

There it is.

I don't have the evidence in front of me, and I do misspeak a lot, so I can't argue whether I could have.

Mark, use your spinning wheel thing that you got.

I'm not going to touch it.

I'm still rendering it.

Oh, it's breaking.

Bob, what's Mark's worst idea for a vacation spot?

Oh,

lots of places.

Sure was.

I think the one he landed on was bottom of the ocean.

Good.

Spicy food or mild food for Bob?

Mild because he's a wimp.

I'll take it.

Bob, salty or sweet for Mark?

Salty.

Because he's a dick.

Oh, damn.

All right.

I'm sure you guys remember at this point, there were only a few you got wrong.

It did really well.

I originally was going to do 20 questions each, and I figured that we probably wouldn't have time for that.

So thankfully, I only did the 10 because we are pushing a longer episode.

I think 20 is the right number.

I think Bob had it right the first time.

I carefully planned that out, didn't it all pick that number randomly out of the air.

It's very meaningful.

You guys only got four wrong between both of you.

Two each, in fact.

That's pretty good.

That's a good listener.

It's because we're good knowers of things.

Honestly, all the extra description helps.

It really does.

Trace back to things.

Yeah, I think most of the extra description helped, but all of the ones where Mark was like, the ocean, space, and Mexico,

and then ultimately circled back to a different answer.

Are the ones where I can't fucking remember?

Yeah, movie villain, he named about four or five, and then you guys went through all the Kung Fu Panda villains.

Condiments was a bit, and then the only other ones you guys got wrong were favorite cereal and the coffee or tea.

Mark just has trouble with breakfast stuff.

All right, well, going through the points here, Bob, you got points for new Lights, same Bob.

Brawl and Carl, three, go-kart, split in half, and then you got points for all the ones you remembered, which I won't go through all of them, but everything except for Honey Mustard and Lord Shin.

Mark, you got points for No Dial, Bob Shade, Return of Lensboy.

is better than you because he would fight a bear and then all the ones except for coffee or tea and favorite cereal right now that puts the score at 12 for Mark, 11 for Bob, and one for me for wouldn't save his own kid.

Earned.

Deserved economy.

I got a point for that.

Bonus points.

Please, at least two.

Please help.

Three is at least two.

It's the weighted three.

Mark's lead is meaningless.

Oh, yeah, I was going to shuffle these.

All right.

What are you adding to the thingy win?

Does everybody have half a point at this point?

Yeah, everyone does half a point.

I believe so.

Let's do a TMI point, too much information, which I think in this case would favor Mark because I think Bob was talking about how you gave too many answers.

I do expand a lot.

Shuffle these bad boys up.

We got three spins here, which probably means we have like six spins because definitely going to get a bunch of stuff that doesn't apply to this specific episode because we're really good at adding things to the deal.

Oh, wow, that comes up a lot.

Oh, the best-looking point.

We are all three wearing gray today, by the way.

Yeah, I was going to say, I did spend all of the beginning of this episode, or maybe before saying how good your lighting is.

You do look really good today, Bob.

I kind of get it.

I dragged myself here from just waking up after like an 11-hour coma.

So, yeah, you know what?

That's true.

Bob and I did get to look at each other for an hour before Mark got here, and that was a good look for Bob on top of just how he looks.

I don't know why you're giving me credit for that.

I was here, I was in and out.

I was doing stuff, but you were here some.

You could see my beautiful lighting for most of it.

All right, Bob gets the best looking point.

I never thought I'd win that one, not gonna lie.

I had faith

most angry, Mark got the angriest at your questions.

He liked your questions a lot.

I was

protest, I did, I did.

I did.

There was a lot of unfairness.

I stopped.

Ah, fuck.

Oh,

why?

No, why?

No, I want that one.

No.

I don't even know what that means.

It's been declared.

Which means that if it's three heads, what the fuck happens here?

So

define what exactly is unfair for starters, I think, is a good starting point.

Mark said that it's unfair.

There was a lot of unfair.

He was discussing the episode.

He was just getting this point.

You got better questions than him.

Yeah, either it has to be.

It has to be the context of what it was said, right?

It has to be this point because that's what I said.

If it's nothing, then it was fair.

If it's all heads, then it was unfair.

And if it's all tails, then it shall be made doubly fair.

So either I get the point, Mark keeps the point, or Mark gets double points, I guess.

There's the same odds, I guess.

So I don't know.

All right.

Okay, so hold on.

All heads favors which one of you two?

Because Mark declared it.

Means I don't get this point.

It was all tails.

All heads confirms it was unfair.

It makes no sense because Mark accidentally called it, but normally, all heads is what you want to have happen when you're the one who says the word.

Okay, all heads gives Bob a point.

All tails markets two points.

Yes.

I have my legally required coin.

Yep, I got it.

I got my coin.

All right, here we go.

Tails.

Tails.

Heads.

Oh, god damn it.

That was so close.

All right.

Ah, shit.

Okay, that was

close.

All right.

So, okay, Mark keeps the point.

Wow.

That's what you got to be careful when you're just saying stuff, man.

Man, I, yeah, I didn't even think.

God, it's been so long.

So Mark is up by one right now.

So if we could get me a point, that would really make some fun stuff happen.

Okay.

Well, actually, wait, this is me, right?

Because Mark slept in today.

Well, no, he said he pulled another all-nighter, though.

Oh, that's true, though.

No, it doesn't matter.

I napped for four hours yesterday, and then I slept for 11.

So I actually have more sleep than I would usually have.

But this is since since last episode that we recorded or it came out.

Okay, yeah, okay.

When was last episode?

Last we were together was Friday.

I actually have a pretty low number of hours of sleep.

I think I have it officially tracked by my watch.

I can check.

Okay.

Have you pulled many or any all-nighters since last Friday?

I have stayed up until 2 a.m.

every night since Friday and then had to wake up at about

whatever in the morning.

Let me look.

I think I actually have this tracked.

I also might have some of this tract.

What was Friday?

What was the date?

Friday would have been the 11th.

So Saturday morning, I woke up with six hours, 25 minutes.

Sunday morning, I woke up with 6 hours, 51 minutes.

Monday morning, I got 8 hours.

Then this morning, I woke up with 5 hours, 23 minutes.

Friday evening, I slept six and a half hours.

And then on Saturday, I slept another six and a half.

Okay, so I had like 20 minutes more than you on

as of Saturday.

I stayed up all night Sunday,

but yesterday I took a nap from 1:30 to about 5:30, maybe 5.

So I would say like four hours nap, but then I'm devastated because last night I slept, I slept 10 hours.

I slept 10 hours last night.

I think you might still have me.

I've slept a total 27 hours.

This is math.

I actually slept 27 hours since the last episode.

I have 32.6 hours of sleep.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Surprisingly close.

Yeah, surprisingly close for me pulling an all-nighter, but you do eventually have to catch up.

I'm not going to lie, I was very nervous because if Bob had gotten that point, it would have been a tie.

Oh, you know what?

I just remembered.

Yeah, Mark, are you sure?

I didn't actually sleep like 10 more hours, Mark.

Oh, you're actually right.

I didn't pull an all-nighter.

I, I, oh, man.

All right.

And with the final score of Wade 1, Bob 12, and Mark 14,

We have our winner.

Yay!

He had the worst questions, he thought, but it turned out he didn't.

It was fair.

But he did sleep the least and was the angriest, which I guess is a good combination.

Congratulations, Mark.

Winner speech.

Well, thank you.

I came into this episode late because I was sleeping so much,

but in all honesty, I was sleeping so little.

And that's the kind of line you need to walk if you want to be a winner.

You got to stay awake long enough to be sleep longer.

So stay awake out there

or sleep.

Wow, inspirational.

Bob, I think you have a very special loser speech to give us, don't you?

Today's loser speech is brought to you by Venmo.

So you've probably heard of Venmo, but did you know that Venmo is for more than paying your friends back?

With the Venmo debit card, you could spend your balance in so many ways.

You can Venmo this and that and everything.

Sadly, for me, I can't Venmo my way out of being today's loser.

I really felt pretty good about this episode, I'm not gonna lie.

I felt like I did a decent job.

Mark was so negative during the questions that I felt like he was doing worse than he was.

And I think I coasted a little bit.

If I had just stopped to think, I definitely knew that honey mustard answer because we talked about that and it was a whole thing.

I just locked in too quick, you know?

And I think I just really need...

Really need less sleep.

I think that's what it is.

I think Mark is absolutely right.

And that's what I get for sleeping so much.

I deserve this and possibly for the first time ever I fully accept it.

I'm a loser.

Once again today's loser speech was brought to you by Venmo.

Whatever your thing is you could pay for it with the Venmo debit card.

Visit venmo.me slash debit to learn more.

That's V E N M O dot M E slash D E B I T to learn more.

Venmo purchase restrictions apply.

The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Vancor Bank NA pursuant to license by MasterCard International Incorporated card may be used everywhere MasterCard is accepted.

Well, that's it.

That's today's show.

Congratulations to Mark for not sleeping and being angry, I guess.

If you want to find us, you can find us at Mark Markiplier, Bob Meisker, me, Minion777, or Lord Minion777.

Yay or nay.

It's one of the two.

Stay tuned for the next one.

Until then,

podcast out.