Randy's Donuts with Gareth Reynolds

This is a head gum podcast.

Want to watch this episode?

Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to youtube.com/slash Doughboys Media.

On January 14th, 1993, The Simpsons first aired its now-legendary episode, Marge vs.

the Monorail, famously written by Conan O'Brien.

In the climax, as the hastily built monorail speeds out of control, endangering the passengers on its maiden voyage, train engineer Homer saves the day by fashioning a makeshift anchor that hooks on to an oversized novelty donut used as a sign for a strip ball business.

It's just one of many pop culture references to an actual donut shop and programmatic architecture example established in Inglewood, California in 1953 as Big Donut Drive-In and later renamed to its current brand.

From its creation, its star attraction has been its giant rooftop donut, visible from the 405 freeway and even from planes landing at nearby LAX Airport.

Measuring 32 feet in diameter and weighing over 15,000 pounds, tourists would make a special trip to Gawk at and later pose for selfies with a giant roundie, while locals kept coming back for the fresh pastries made from a house flour blend.

The donut marquee has appeared in movies like Mars Attacks and Iron Man 2 and TV shows like Arrested Development and Jimmy Kim Alive, and the donut has been reskinned to remote things like Ghostbusters, the red-hot chili peppers, and the masked singer.

The Simpsons even referenced the donut shop a second time with its parody Lard Lad Donuts, which would become a staple of both the animated and theme park Springfields.

In 2015, Mark Colegian, who made his fortune in his family's casino business, bought the little donut shop with a giant donut sign and has since turned it into a chain, adding espresso drinks and dozens of franchise locations throughout the American West, as well as South Korea, Saudi Arabia, and the Philippines.

But is this LA landmark going down the disastrous road of other beloved long-time institutions that embarked on quixotic global expansion plans, like Halal Guys and Dickie's BBQ Pit?

Whatever happens to the outlets, the original's Big Donut will remain a big draw.

This week on Doughboys, Randy's Donuts.

Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants.

I'm Tiger Weiger, along with my co-host,

The Fridge to Terabithia,

the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell.

Wow.

I mean, I like it.

It's pretty funny.

That's fun.

The Fridge to Terabithia.

Everyone can enjoy that one.

I've been listening for many years.

Thanks for making long train rides fun on the L here in Chicago, the city of heavies.

Andre Calot, Cayotte.

The City of Heavies.

That's right.

City of Heavies by Andre.

Saint Andre on the Dose Squad, roasted birdfuck.com.

Hey, Saints, Chicago.

Timely as of this board.

That's right, Mitch.

This episode is coming out in June.

So, you know, we're in the Frank Bank here.

This will be

a little bit backlog topically, but we should acknowledge you a good Catholic boy.

You have a new a new leader.

Today is my Super Bowl, dude.

Brian O'Donnell texted me today and wrote, da Pope, which is good.

That's pretty good.

Jack Allison

talked about deep dish communion.

Oh, no, you missed it.

Evan Susser.

I did it twice.

Evan Susser

said deep dish communion, which may be, I think that can convert Susser if there was deep dish communion waivers.

I think it was wishful thinking on his part.

I love

these timestamped initial reactions.

These are jokes that came out in the two minutes after the announcement.

Honestly.

And this audience is hearing it a month later.

Yeah, sure.

That's great.

I mean,

my thought about him converting was just on the spot.

That's the truth.

Mitch, you're right.

It is.

Why?

Because what do you want?

It's a time capsule.

I know.

It's fine.

The Pope is.

There's no way we're not going to be talking about the Pope.

So we might as well.

The Pope is there.

It's big news.

It's big news.

Big news.

Green smoke has come from the chimney.

This is a reference to a Frog Pope bit of Mitch's in the past.

That's what he's talking about with the green smoke.

Which you did that when it happened,

you were talking about green smoke, and I appreciate it.

That Frog Pope lives on.

If I die, will you promise to make Frog Pope?

Wait, what do you mean?

Make Frog Pope?

If I die,

will you video Frog Pope?

What?

Will you make the video of Frog Pope Pope?

Oh, you want me to produce

that bit?

Yeah.

Like shoot it as a video.

If I die too early,

which

would be sad.

Of course it would be sad.

I mean, Frog Pope would be per it would be so timely right now.

It sucks.

You should have had Frog Pope ready to go.

I know, I know.

You know what you should do?

Make Frog Pope now and then just sit on it for like another decade.

And then when there's the next conclave, you can bust it out.

It would be perfect.

Jesus, I'm going to be Pope Age by the time the next one comes around.

Wow, I could be Pope.

That's a weird thing because I certainly, Mitch, you and I are both sportos.

You have the thing pretty early on when you start realizing, like, oh, your favorite athlete is younger than you.

Yeah.

And then you reach the point that's where I'm at now, where it's like, some head coaches are younger than me, which is very strange to think about.

You're going to reach an age where the pope is younger than you.

I know.

That's wild.

I know.

That's scary.

Man,

I watch the uh, their athletes are always younger than me.

I watched the, never mind.

What were you gonna say?

I watched TSN Toddler Sports Network.

Amit, you have a drop to play?

You ever watch TSN Toddler Sports Network?

Yeah, I'll pop, I'll pop on some TSN.

Amelia, play the drop.

Listeners, don't be mad that I have stairs.

Give me a house with stairs, long, beautiful stairs, climbing, heaving, snacks and jacks and anti-vaxxing.

My home must have stairs.

Two stores are taller.

Why, because I got stairs in every state.

My

stairs.

Wow.

Well, there you have it.

I liked it.

It was good.

That was great.

That was great.

It's a hair from the musical hair.

My mom told a story about seeing because, like, the musical hair, the live show, I have never seen the movie, but the live stage show, which I've also never seen, but I know what it is.

It's like a hippie musical.

And I guess at the for the final number, every all the caskets fully naked.

They're all just like full frontal.

And my mom talked about going to see that show, and she didn't know that was going to happen.

And she said, I had to take my glasses off.

Oh, my God.

She's scandalized.

That's wild.

Yeah.

I didn't know that.

I had no idea with the wild.

Yeah.

Hey, we're going to be in New York.

Is the hair still going or no?

Now I'm wondering if the hair they're referring to is

Pew's.

Maybe.

There is no.

There is no.

I can't find the

email.

I'll find it.

Okay, we'll see.

I got it.

You got it.

Hey, everyone.

Some of us on the Doscord collaborated on this parody of hair to celebrate Mitch's lifelong love affair with stairs.

Enjoy.

Seagulls, Chicago Leah, and Chris Finky.

Finky.

Wow.

Colab.

I love it.

I like the

force of dose squadrons meeting to make that drop.

I love it.

And Seagulls and Finky both submitted drops in the past.

Chicago Leah, of course, we know.

It was a good one.

It was a good one.

Yeah.

Well crafted.

We're off on a bad, where something's wrong here today.

What's up?

What do you mean something's wrong?

I think we're doing great.

TSN was great.

We all enjoyed Toddler Sports Network.

I'm leaving tomorrow.

I'm off to New York.

That's right.

So, getting that

putting the will together, which my will is just you making the Frog Pope sketch.

Yeah, you got that sorted.

I got that sorted.

The flying is scary right now.

Why?

Because I know that's a flying fly.

That's bad time to fly.

I'm not particularly enthused about it.

Drops of birdfuck.com.

But I am enthused about our guests.

Yes, we both are.

First time on the podcast from We're Here to Help and the Dollop.

His new podcast, Next We Have, is out today, June 5th.

Gareth Reynolds is here.

Hi, Gareth.

Hi, guys.

Thank you for having me.

Thanks so much for being here.

Thank you.

Maybe you end the 10th anniversary show like hair.

Wow.

Maybe that's the move.

Wow.

Shock them.

Let them see what they've always wanted.

That's

yeah.

Grow it out.

I bet it's grown out on both of you.

I'll tell you, I got it.

Yeah.

I feel like,

yeah, just let it go.

You could do do it.

Oh, my God.

I do what people will be putting on glasses.

I think there's a penis under there.

That's the kind of thing of like when I've talked about, like, hey, let's put our feet up on the Patreon or whatever.

I like, whether they like it or dislike it, either way, I'm like not happy about it.

Like, neither one is good.

Like, either they're too into it and it's like, oh, our fans are just horny, or they reject it.

And I'm just like, oh, they think I'm repulsive.

Rather horny, but

it's like a hair, to be be honest yeah but uh no i get that for sure yeah yeah you feel like a piece of meat how you have you guys the money if you got the money the money's pretty good the feet yeah money's great that foot money yeah well actually on the new podcast uh we have a thing where i'm trying to join uh like a foot fetish website okay and um and i actually it got a little out of control and i started sucking my own toes which i didn't know i could do oh my god and then when i realized i could do it i was like well fuck we probably should do this so i was like

and my face is in it, which is like not a lot of people are showing their face.

So I'm trying any angle I got.

Wait, so this is a this is specifically a community of foot fetishists.

This isn't on an existing platform like OnlyFans or Fansly or whatever.

This is like its own thing.

Yeah, it's like just for feet.

Wow.

Feet stuff.

Foot stuff.

Okay.

Yeah.

I don't think I've said this before.

I don't think, I mean, I think that there is probably,

I think there's probably a mindset with a lot of people that I'm a gross man in some ways, but I'm not a dirty guy, but feet.

My feet are, feet are kind of gross for me my feet specifically i think are gross why

pristine why are you what is it about him uh unkempt yeah nail wise i don't really give a fuck i i don't i do not have fungus toe which a lot of people have fungus toe i don't know if you're uh do you know i i like i take really good care of my feet i get regular pedicures that's the self-care thing i do for me yeah i love it i started doing it like five years ago and it's it's great i look forward to it i'm just gonna say the gross thing i sometimes get athletes foot Yeah.

I mean, I've gotten that in the past.

And that's a fungal infection, but it's very treatable.

It's all the stairs.

That's really

working hard.

Maybe I need breathable shoes.

I don't know why I get it.

I'm very flat-footed.

That's another thing.

So my feet just look.

What exactly?

It's just a little rashy, a little itchy.

Yeah.

Do you not get it?

I never, I've never, I don't think I have.

I've gotten it before.

But I said the same thing about hemorrhoid.

I was like, I've never had a hemorrhoid, and everyone's like, you've had a hemorrhoid.

Yeah.

But I.

You've probably, yeah, you've had a hemorrhoid.

Did you, but did you

think you did or not?

Or do you still No, I don't think I've ever had it.

I think it's possible you have not had one.

I didn't have one until later in life than I, you know,

I'd assumed.

Yeah, right.

So it's possible you've just dodged a bullet.

Sweating.

Yeah.

It's from sweating?

Hemoroid?

Or athlete's foot?

Both, I guess.

Let's go to both.

I think they're both.

Isn't a hemorrhoid the athlete's foot of the asshole?

It's a little different.

I think more like a jock itch is like the athlete's foot of that area.

Yeah.

Jock itch as well.

And you can get both.

You can transfer it from your feet to your crotch.

Hey,

as boys.

Let's talk here for a second.

Locker room.

As the boys.

Locker room.

Yeah, let's lock a room.

Ladies, turn the pod down.

Hey, when you give that jock an itch sometimes, it feels really good.

Am I right, my boys?

Nothing like it during, nothing worse after.

You're scratching.

It feels good to play

the Al Bundy from Married With Children, just sort of the screen.

Hands down the pants.

I love it.

I do that way too much.

I do too.

I do too.

I'm still, I don't know what it is about.

It's like Nature's Mitten.

Yeah.

It's kind of just like.

It's nice warmth.

Yeah, your own little mitten down there.

My little guy, Pete, you know, peeks out.

Yeah.

Well,

he's about to go to just off Broadway in Boston, where he's about to shine with a chorus of.

Oh, never mind.

Oh, God.

Yeah, we got to cut that.

We got to cut that.

No, it's fine.

No, it's not.

It's easy to out later.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, really?

He began to join us.

There was a chorus.

Yeah, there was a chorus.

There is a chorus.

Was there?

We don't know.

This does come out later.

Yeah.

All right, great.

June 5th, we talked about this.

Okay, I might have almost blew that up.

Not at all.

But no, what a show it was.

Really was.

Oh, what a show.

Awesome.

Oh, the Boston show was the 10-year anniversary show was a blast.

Yeah, good for you guys.

Yeah.

Yeah, we knocked it out of the park.

Pack.

You were happy to be there.

Oh, my God.

Thanks for inviting me, by the way.

I didn't expect this to go so well.

Wait, now I'm like fucked up on my timeline.

I can't believe David Ortiz made an appearance.

Poppy.

Big Poppy was there.

Why do they call him Poppy?

He hit donuts into the audience.

That was crazy.

Why do they call him Big Poppy?

Do you know the etymology of the nickname?

He's a big guy.

He's a big dad guy.

It's just purely zombies.

I mean, this is a great Boston trivia thing that I'm like, why do they call him Big Poppy?

I don't know.

That's just his nickname.

I'm pretty sure he gave the nickname to himself.

Yeah, that sounds good.

That does sound good.

That's a good one.

That's like when Shaq nicknamed himself Big Aristotle.

That was a lot.

Yeah.

And then he went to every new team.

He he didn't realize he was gonna get traded 15 times at the end he's like i'm big i'm big shamrock it's like shaq

stop i liked big shamrock i mean it was for me it was it was a nice it was a nice was that his last one uh no he actually after he he played more or after boston right or did he or did he thought boston was his final year maybe it was his final year it was getting bad it was bad and also we should have won the championship and it was like shaq was like too gassed well i mean that's like but that that's the the we don't need to spend too much time talking about hoops here, but like, but you know, that's, that's the whole, the Cavs, the Suns, everyone was trying to

get it, to get a good season out of, a healthy season out of old Shaq.

And it's just like, there's a certain point.

But with Boston specifically, like, it was a good team that, like, if he had been just a little bit better, and it's not his fault completely, of course, but I'm saying, like, that team could have won.

That team was like one of the top three teams.

It's a big if to like hang, hang on to.

Oh, Jesus.

No, no, I'm just saying.

Like, you know, if ifs and buts were candy and nuts.

Well, I can't believe the Celtics have come back from two down to the Knicks and now won the series, too.

Eminently possible that they are in the NBA Finals now.

But again, we don't need to talk about hoops too much, and we don't need to timestamp this too much.

I want to talk about Next We Have a little bit, which is out today.

Fuck.

Yeah.

Time stamp.

Yeah.

Hoops are current.

The finals are here.

Yeah, I know.

All right, go on.

Just go on.

There's something wrong with this.

It's also possibly that the Celtics are possible the Celtics are going to get swept by the Knicks.

So they're down 2-0 right now.

They're not looking so hot.

Maybe they'll write the ship.

I don't know.

I'm going to the game on Saturday.

Oh, are you?

You guys might be in jail in the future from the hair show.

It's true.

It's possible.

I mean, giving you my will before I get on a plane and before I go to a Knicks game with a Celtics hat on is a good move.

It's a terrifying time to have to get on an airplane, and we have to fucking do it.

It's always terrifying to go to a Knicks game if you're not rooting for the Knicks.

Well,

you don't have to wear Celtics gear.

You know, that's a decision.

You think I should not wear the hat?

I mean, I think there will be other Celtics fans there, but I think people will flip you off.

That's fine.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Hey, fuck you.

Hey, man, I'm just a Celtics fan.

No, your podcast fucking sucks shit.

You like the Celtics?

All right.

Next, we have the new pod, includes someone from the Doughboys family.

Amelia is your youth correspondent.

Yes, yes.

Amelia is nice enough to join.

It's one of those things where it's like,

you know, she basically has come on the show a few times to test me on young person terms.

And it's just shocking.

It's like really makes me feel so old.

Oh, for sure.

There's just a lot of stuff.

Like, Kevin heard her talk in the break room one day, and he was like, come on.

And then she comes on, and I just go, God damn, I got no clue what these people are talking about.

Yeah.

Finally, if you really do feel old, I finally feel like fully old where I'm like, what is she talking about?

It was easier for her.

She talks so fast.

Right.

I reached a point where I realized how often she was just insulting me and then I was just like, okay, this is a little bit, now I understand what's going on it is insolence then isn't it I thought I thought she had the air about her

what the sigma

what did she say you say what the sigma what the hell does that mean

Jesus Christ these kids is this still cool yeah can you still do that that's really cool that is cool yeah

what is is that dabbing it's dabbing

can we floss still um yeah you could you could floss your attitude is just.

What's cool?

I don't know.

She's come on and helped me with a number of things, but it's still, it's embarrassing.

Yeah, what is it?

I always just hear her say sigma.

That's the only thing that I can say.

I've been saying sigma lately.

What is it?

What do I say sigma?

Well, none of this is cool.

Okay.

But it's just, it's online terms that...

kids like 10 to 15 use and for some reason that's become in the in the vernacular toilet what was it

skibby skibbity toilet Okay, I am familiar with Skibbity Toilet.

My wife has shown me skibbity toilet.

Yeah, that's a lot of fun, actually.

Skibbity Toilet's been around, though, for a while, hasn't it?

That's stupid bullshit.

Yeah, see, I didn't know about it till late.

Looks maxing, aura maxing.

Like the second I was like, Riz, people are like, dude, stop.

That's like four months old.

Right.

I was like, ah.

But she's been very helpful.

But yeah, I mean, the whole show is just a lot of, like, you know, just very short form.

There's no real through line other than it's just a lot of little bits,

which is, you know,

if it's good, it's good.

If it's not, you know, it's just in the show.

Yeah.

You know, we know that.

We know that here at Doughboy.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah.

Well, this is my third podcast.

So I'm like, what is happening?

You know, it's just, but it's the first one I've done alone.

Like, we're here to help

with Jake.

I wasn't sure if we were going to keep going.

So then I just kind of started this, and then we kept doing we're here to help.

So now it's just a bunch of little bits.

I love it.

Digestible.

Yeah.

We have to do a stupid fucking restaurant every week.

It sucks.

yeah, you've created your own, yeah, we've created our own prison, it's a bit, yeah, it's a bit of a gilded cage.

Yeah,

yeah, we pulled a creed, my own prison.

We created

a creed.

Do you know who Creed is, Amelia?

Yeah, I know Creed.

Yeah, right.

Sigma.

Oh, you know him ironically.

Here's the thing with you guys: back in our day, like, eats on, oh, it tastes like ass.

Now, for you guys, it's a term of endearment.

So, if you're at a five-star restaurant and yum, it tastes like ass.

Please tell the chef that tasted like ass.

What an unbelievable gnocchi.

Such ass.

You're from Milwaukee or the Milwaukee area.

There are a couple of Milwaukee chains we have covered on the podcast when we've been on the road that I've really enjoyed.

Culvers and cops.

Oh, fuck great.

I was wondering if you would have been to Cops is awesome.

Yeah, Cops was great.

Culver's also great.

The Culver, when I would go there in high school, it was always senior citizen.

Like, it was shocking how many old people were working in culver's.

Interesting.

Because I've heard the opposite now.

Now I heard it's all like 15-year-olds.

They must have just made the swallow.

I mean, it makes sense for a business model to be like, you forgot about the fish.

And they're like, what?

Like, Jesus Christ.

We're trying to be nice to you, but there's business.

And then cops, amazing.

Yeah.

Cops was like, when I was growing up, I think there was only one cops.

I think there might still only be the one cops, but it's just kind of so iconic.

Maybe there were, maybe there were a few, but we did go, I think, to the original location.

We love cops yeah yeah

yeah

we're not a camp

uh no it's k-op-p-s i believe yes yeah yeah uh but yeah no it was amazing every time i went there huge line it was just uh the best because we do friday fish fry in milwaukee too what why did that stress you out i have to go to the bathroom oh you do okay it's okay it's so early in the show it's fine it's all right i'm gonna just say this it's because of what we did today so this is we're now opening it up to the fact that we know which portal needs to open

this is not a this is not a drink move this is a food move who knows

well when you go down sometimes it's both here let's let's do a little bathroom breakdown we'll we'll we'll pause for a second breakdown okay and then we'll i honestly can we can we just actually keep going for a second sure

i need the fear i need the fear to come back it just went away

yeah you want to be you want to

it's like there's a new pope, and you need the smoke to come out of your chimney.

That's what I'm saying.

The brown smoke.

The brown smoke.

Well, just remember you're in a safe place and everybody wants you to feel good.

That I appreciate that.

You know, as a boy, oh no, it came back.

Okay, great.

See, there we go.

I'm pretty good.

I'm also going to say this:

if I see the Rizzler in New York, I'm going to kick his fucking ass.

It's a child, man.

It's a child, actually.

Diaria break.

All right, we're back.

Mitch, how you feeling?

Well, I bathroom breakdown.

There was a breakdown in the bathroom.

Not much of a bathroom breakdown at all.

You had like an urgent need, and then you go in there and you kind of get

the day after my shot.

Yes.

Well, you know, I didn't even.

I was so, there was a bunch of headgum hunks out there.

And then that's hard too.

That is hard.

That's not easy, but then they weren't out there when I went out there, which was great.

But just

a no-go.

That's tough.

No, not just a no-go.

It feels like your body's lying to you when that happens.

Yeah, I don't like that.

No.

I don't like that.

This has always been my...

I need to drink more water, but also it's the day after my shot.

What shot?

I'm on Zepp Bounds to lose weight.

So

it's not easy to,

it fucks with my stomach.

So afterwards.

You get to get it.

Which is great until the day after my Zepp Bound shot to eat 100 donuts.

They say to do that.

I think it's good.

I remember that from the commercial.

Yeah.

That's the B-roll: someone just pounding donuts in the bathroom.

It was just me literally slicing off little pieces of donuts and eating.

But anyway, is the shot weekly?

Yes, weekly.

So every week, and then it's just kind of like, you know, it's front-loaded in terms of like you have it most intent, like it, it fucks with you the most

day after day after, yeah, day of, and then it kind of disappears.

Wednesdays now, yeah.

Okay.

We got to get that guy in you.

Feed that tiger.

Fucking

sedate that tiger.

I listened to Jackie by Scott Walker in the bathroom.

Okay, fun.

Then tools 46 and 2 came on.

That's the.

Wow.

So the music wasn't the issue.

Yeah.

No, it's the body.

46 and number 2.

I know number 2.

The two didn't show up.

Just the 46.

Yeah.

Well, then you're on the clock.

Yeah.

The clock doesn't help.

The clock does not help.

I got to come back in here.

I know I got to come back in here.

I can't spend time in here.

I get to come back.

I get to come back in here.

I can't spend the whole day in there.

You know, like, if I was at home, I'd be like, hey, you know what?

I'm just going to sit.

I'm going to sit here because who cares?

Yeah.

Sure.

Because you've got nothing to do.

But then you could get a hemorrhoid.

That is the issue.

Oh, good.

That's a good idea.

Gareth, you've been a vegetarian for a while now.

Yeah.

That's correct?

Yeah.

Wow.

So, so, okay, so because when we're talking about what chain we wanted to cover here, we had a few different, a few different things.

So annoying for you to.

Not at all.

No, we have vegetarian.

Not at all.

We have vegetarians on the podcast all the time.

I had to stretch I was vegetarian, and

it's more annoying than a lot of chicken.

I wasn't chicken, weren't you?

No, I wasn't vegan.

Oh, that's the fucking worst.

Yeah, that's that's that one is so hard.

Have you been vegan?

I tried to do it.

Yeah.

I did it.

We toured Australia and I actually did it for the tournament, but it was like, all you could eat was like pastry in the morning.

Yeah.

So it was just, I was like, well, what is the fucking point of this to put on like 10 pounds of bread weight?

Like, it's already you're fighting a battle.

So

I couldn't pull off vegan.

I just couldn't do it.

Especially when you're, because you travel a lot.

And so you're kind of limited.

And as you know, you go to different chain restaurants, fast food places.

Sometimes they don't, you know, like, I guess I could eat a bun.

You know what I mean?

Like, the options aren't particularly readily available.

But like, what are your go-tos?

I stayed a vegan for a short period of time.

And I think that she believed that I would become vegan at some point.

And I was like, it ain't happening.

It's not going to, it's not, it just was not.

I mean, like, vegetarian.

I couldn't, I don't know if that will happen for me ever in my life, but going, like eating vegetarian for a month or something, I could see myself do, or like, you know, a couple months out of the year or something.

Vegetarian is not, is not that hard because breakfast, you've got eggs, no problem.

Yeah.

Cheese also is huge.

Cheese is fine.

You know, so you really are kind of.

And then, you know, you get the problem with anything like that is that it is just like this like personal choice.

Like I just read a book and I was like, you know what?

I'm going to,

but then people are like, what about your cat?

And I'm like,

I do.

You know, you got me.

I like you, you cannot eliminate this from the world we live in.

So it is kind of like, you know, we're all fudging the numbers a little bit.

We're all choosing where we're going to draw the line.

Yeah.

You know, and whatever.

Yeah.

And then it's like, as long as you're internally consistent.

I also, if I go to like a wet, like a wedding or something, there are those moments where I'll like eat five croquettes and then someone will be like, there's bacon in that.

And I'll be like, well, you know what?

I just had a freebie.

It's like a hall pass, meat-wise.

Sure, yeah.

This bacon wrap date was going to go in the dumpster anyway after this event.

You killed me.

You can kill yourself up or stuff like that.

By the way, our our CPA has told us to stop fudging the numbers because we like we'll give them tax documents and they're covered in chocolate.

It's terrible.

That guy.

Yeah, he's got a,

he's got a lot of work to do.

It's a coveted chocolate mill.

A lot of his work is just like defudging RW2s.

Little fingerprints.

Yeah, breaking off.

Yeah.

Sometimes just fully coated in chocolate just breaks the chocolate, like coating off.

Tootsie roll.

Well, you know what?

I started doing.

I started, this is, because I was telling you before, like, I drive to a lot of my shows.

I started bringing a hot plate with me.

Wow.

And a pan.

And so, like, I remember watching this guy on TikTok who would, like, cook ribs in the sink of his room, like, just bizarre.

And then I was like, man, this guy's an animal.

And now I, in my room, am like, where am I going to put all these eggshells?

Like, it has become.

You become one of those guys.

Completely.

Yeah, yeah.

Like, when I go into a hotel, people are like, and it's mostly one-nighters, but people will be like, do they have a a hot plate?

Yeah.

And I, you know, tip the mate accordingly.

But it is,

it is, it's all because road eating becomes so difficult.

It's so difficult to not put on a lot of weight, especially if you're in comedy clubs every night and they're offering you like.

chuckle fucker fries and like all this other shit.

Yeah.

It's that sort of thing of like when you're back, even if you're a person who orders food a lot, which I do do, but it's like you have your places that you're going to get, you're going to get a salad from Sweet Green or whatever.

Yeah.

When you're on a road, sometimes it's like, I need to eat the burger or whatever, the veggie burger from this fucking, from this comedy club or whatever.

Your body, like, starts, I don't know.

It just, if I'm not home and I'm on the road, my, I, like, my body just all of a sudden is like, you can drink wine during the day a little bit more.

And like, if I'm in an airport, all of a sudden, I'm like, fries are fine.

Like, it all changes so quickly.

Yeah.

You have this to look forward to.

No, I mean, like, I, I, look, I, I'm not a bit, not a fan of traveling in general.

I, uh, I, I will say, yeah, the erraticism of it is part of it, of just like that, because I'm such a creature of habit.

I'm such a fan of routine.

Yep, schedule is so.

That's why.

Why do you say it?

Because you guys are about to go travel.

We're about to tour, and Mitch knows I'm not like excited.

Whatever.

It's fine.

Yeah, it is hard, though.

Yeah.

It's like.

I never have heard the term erraticism, and I immediately just thought of rats having sex.

I had no idea what the fuck you were talking about.

I thought of the Radisson Hotel.

The erratic, which maybe is where you're staying.

It's right near the Wilker.

The erratic.

Oh, did you say the erraticism?

Yeah, I don't even know if that's a word.

I think it could be.

Yeah.

Erratic.

Yeah, like erratic.

Oh, oh.

The unpredictable nature.

Of course.

Eroticism.

Okay.

All right.

I had no idea.

Yeah.

I think it works.

Is it a word?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

The kids say it.

Does it have riz?

Yes, it has riz for sure.

Wow.

Interesting.

There is, susser was using some term, like the kid term, like one of those kid terms.

And it stood out the other day.

What was it?

Was it a was either like let them cook or something like that.

But there is like a...

I think Sussex is hungry.

He's always like the Hulk.

He's always hungry.

Some of that vernacular, is that what I'm referring to?

Is seeping into

it's affecting us old, the us older people.

It's coming through now.

The kid talk.

The kid talk is coming through.

Some of it's just becoming standard.

It's a good thing.

It should be good.

I just know

I'm like graveyard for those terms when I start saying them like they're over.

Like I kind of feel like a marker for that.

Like by the time I know about it, it's no longer relevant.

But remember when you were a kid and you were like, I mean, when I was a kid, like we had our, like when you'd hear an old person try to hang, you'd be like, buddy, nobody's saying red anymore.

Yes, right.

You know.

Yeah.

Like it would start to jump the sharks.

Tubular,

tubular was a big one.

Yeah.

Tubular had six months where it was on fire.

Cowabunga, tubular, all that stuff was, that was, it was, I guess, real at one point.

I guess I never remember anyone like truly saying cowabunga.

I mean, I think that was ninja turtle specific.

Some people would say it made it reference to it.

See, when we were kids, there were turtles who were mutants.

You believe that?

Yeah.

The ninja turtles, my understanding, still like, are still thriving.

They still exist.

They just have like a different canon.

And their younger people have a different ninja turtle song.

They were like, what's the ninja turtle song?

They're not thinking, teenage mutant, ninja turtles, teenage mutant, ninja turtles.

It's a different song.

It's like something that I don't even know.

It's a melody I wouldn't recognize.

Well, when I like, I, so I was, my parents are English, raised in Wisconsin.

So I would go to England very often.

And this was something I found like they gave me a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle sleeping bag for one Christmas when I was over there.

And I looked on the sleeping bag and it said Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles.

And I was like, oh, what the fuck?

I was like, what?

And there was this whole thing where England wouldn't say ninja.

And so the theme song, the first time I saw it over there, it's the weirdest thing ever because it's just like, it really is awkwardly dubbed in where they're just like, teenage mutant, hero turtles, teenage mutant, hero turtle.

Like they refuse.

I never knew.

I never knew this.

Yeah,

they had some embargo on not saying ninja.

Wow.

Yeah, the English.

I wonder if it wasn't real.

Let's be real.

Turtle power is a little too pro-turtle.

It is.

Well, you know, turtle power, especially now, because those turtle power groups are just rising up.

Those marches are scary.

You do not want to get involved in a turtle power.

Oh, I mean, but we should get involved now because it'll spread.

We've seen it before.

Look, I voted for the shredder, so Jesus Christ.

I can't believe I'm with a shredder voter.

Yeah, I wonder if that was, they thought ninja wouldn't localize, like, like British kids didn't have a concept of what a ninja was.

I wonder if that, or if it was like a weird rights thing or some weird Japanophobia.

I have no idea.

I've found with the English that if it could be racist, that's probably the wisest play to just

probably a racial thing with them.

Right.

Versus like, well, kids won't understand it.

No, don't learn a Japanese either.

Nana, give them an inch.

So what are like, what, okay, you are on the road.

Maybe you don't have access to the hot plate or maybe you just got to, I've got to eat at some restaurant for out of necessity.

What are you hoping for?

Like, what's the ideal for you?

Because, you know, you can cobble together a pretty good vegetarian meal at like a Taco Bell or something.

But

I, well, you know, I start out, always start out pretty good.

The first week, I'm like, I probably will avoid the drive-through.

And then it's that second, third week.

Taco Bell is a banger.

I'll get a bean and cheese hard shell, which they're pretty weird about.

So you have to go

beef taco, no beef, add beans.

Right.

They, for some reason, have made it complicated.

Dell taco for a while did the Impossible Taco, which was fucking delicious.

Yeah, they discontinued

it.

Almost all the chains except for Burger King.

Burger King is the only one that still has the Impossible Whopper.

All the rest of them have gotten rid of their plant-based proteins.

It's kind of a bummer.

Hey, it's about the bottom line, you know.

That's true.

Here we go.

You can't blame them.

You can't blame him.

The turtle power.

Panda Express.

Oh, okay.

What are you getting there for as a vegetarian?

They have a fake chicken.

They have like a fake,

fake chicken.

Fake orange chicken.

It's pretty good.

That's a good one.

And then Subway.

Subway still

is pretty good.

They have the veggie patty there.

But I do sometimes, I will like on the road sometimes do like...

you know, like sometimes I'll get like chicken every now and then.

Sure.

Now I've started to mix it in a little bit just because it gets so hard.

But those are vegetarian wise, those to me are the best ones.

Subway, even if you don't get, I can still eat like just fucking vegetables and that bread.

I don't know.

Still got me.

We kind of buried Subway.

We've had some bad recent experiences with Subway.

I will say, when I was very sick-wise, I told you, I got a turkey with Swiss cheese toasted and just vinegar on it.

And it was like,

it just was like, oh, this is good plenty.

Nourishment.

Yeah, nothing.

Yeah.

Nourishment.

Yeah.

Well, there's certain things there where i'm like you know like the if they if they have to use like an ice cream scooper for any meat i'm like ah steer clear of that right yeah like to me that's where but but i don't know i'd like again the chicken are you no fish you're not a pescatarian not really fish no yeah no i don't shame them but they're they're a little strange to me the pescatarians yeah i don't really get it yeah it's uh you know again we're all we're all drawing our own arbitrary lines i kind of can understand the argument but certain fish i'm like also like oh man like like when i when i was this guy's a soul judger, he tries to judge what type of soul he's right.

I'm also

like an op, like calamari to me.

I'm like, that you know, they can get out of jars.

Yeah, I feel very strange.

I'm not eating that.

I don't, I don't eat cephalopods.

I don't eat octopus.

I don't eat squid, even though I do eat fish.

Like, that's like one thing.

I just like, I feel weird about that.

I was not eating any pork for a while, and now I'm just like, if something has bacon in it, I'm not going to like take it off.

I'm going to throw it in.

IQ-based eating seems that I'm okay with that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Honestly.

Last month,

I'm doing only cephalopod eating.

You know that's why.

Because I'm just

only, wow, what a weird lane to carve out.

I know, I know.

It just seems so aggressive to just be based on his personal.

Yeah, it does seem like I'm doing I'm actually trying to cancel out whatever you do.

Cephalopod only.

The fact that they can't open jars is a, that is a, that is a tough.

They're picking World Cup winners.

They're opening jars.

My octopus, they're changing colors.

But then I also feel like, you know.

If you pick against the Celtics, it's calamari time, is all I'm saying.

I'm going to fucking eat your ass.

I am always thinking, because like, we'll never be able to anticipate how future, you know, societies will judge us.

Like, what I do think, obviously, pretty obviously they'll look back at factory farming and think that was absolutely horrific.

But there's also things like, I don't know, what do we know about plant consciousness?

I have no fucking idea.

Well, the more they study it, the more you're like, they're screaming.

Yeah.

Like, then you talk to scientists, like, I put wires on it, and the plant's like, fuck!

Fuck!

And you're like, well, that's not good either.

Yeah.

Well, what the hell are we supposed to do?

We don't eat

anything.

Like, this God up there.

What does he want from us?

He's really messing with us a lot.

He's messing with us.

What are you supposed to eat?

I'm eating God.

That's what I'm doing.

What do you think?

If plants are yelling, you know, plants have feelings.

Well, there are the people.

I read about the people who only eat things that naturally drop.

You know, that's limiting.

Yeah,

that's tough.

If nothing drops, you're like, boy, this is tough.

You're like just living like a scavenger, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know if there's a,

I don't know the most ethical way to eat.

But I mean, I certainly think there are things that if you're just sort of like looking to generally like limit the amount of misery, you know what I mean?

Like,

I eat some meat.

I try to avoid factory farm meat as much as possible, but it's just like, I don't know.

I think as much, I mean, you can't, you know, you can do what you can do.

And also, like, affordability, there's, there's all these things that are just kind of societally baked in at this point.

But

if you fell down in a pig pen, you would be eaten by the pig.

Sure.

Or you would.

That's where they want to go now that you mention it.

That's really.

Actually, Wager May have just become their fucking leader, little fucking piggy.

Yeah.

I called him a piggy on an episode a while back, and we had fun.

We were having fun.

Be the best one to go.

Their leader.

Jesus, I screwed up.

Get him.

Come on, boys.

But they will eat you.

You know, the pigs would eat you alive.

Yes, they should.

But also, like, you know, we can't apply because nature is amoral.

We can't expect there to be,

we can't say, like, well, this, this dog doesn't have the same moral values as me.

Oh, you think you're better than a dog?

No, but I mean, that's the thing.

Maybe I'm not.

I don't fucking know.

I'm only eating dog.

I love this stuff.

So good.

I'll eat it and I'll go like, we really was a good boy.

What a good boy.

I would eat dog meat if it was just like, well, this is dog.

This dog meat is otherwise going to be thrown away.

Yeah.

I guess I'll just, I'll try it.

I don't know.

You're learning.

How many cats?

By the way, the guy who's doing that is tricking you.

He's really like, otherwise it goes right in the garbage.

Fancy a dog.

I think the like the thing is that it is.

It's like, if you can look at it in the sense of like, look, we're going to be eating everything.

So why not try to make sure it had like a fairly decent life so you reward in that way?

But again, I mean, if you're like on the road in the middle of nowhere and you're like, I'm just going to have a taco bell.

Yeah, it's fine.

So if years, years from now, Wally and Irma are there on their last legs and I take them to the vet and I'm like, oh, they actually, they accidentally turned Wally and Irma into burgers.

What vet is this?

Welcome to oopsies.

But I'm going to throw them away.

You'd be like, no, no, I'll eat them.

You would eat the Wally and Irma burger.

I would, in that specific situation, because I know those are animals who are near and dear to your heart, I would honor your wishes.

That's what I'm talking about.

Are you going to throw them away?

I was like, do you want your burgers?

I guess I would have to throw them away.

Do you want to give them a proper burial?

Would you feel like that?

They were burying burgers?

I don't know.

Bury them in your belly.

There you go.

I'd give them a good home.

No, I like...

No tombstone tattoos.

It's whatever.

Like, if you feel like, hey, I actually would be probably honoring them by making sure that they are consumed.

I don't know.

I don't know what you would want.

There has to be.

That would not be honoring them that they were getting consumed.

They were already made into burgers.

Yeah, what a mistake.

I'd be upset.

Your issue is with the vet.

Yes, I agree.

The vet made your animals into little delicious patties.

Now, were we to just laugh in his face?

Or should we?

And he also, I guess, in this scenario, he also cooked them and put lettuce on top of them.

It's got a little chef hat on.

How do you like them?

Oh, my God.

What am I doing?

I thought it was at home.

I was picturing burger burger patties.

You're saying he presents you with a full burger.

Full season burger.

So at what point does he realize his mistake?

When he gives me the burger, I say, what are you doing?

I thought I was going to get ashes.

You gave me burgers.

Oh my God.

I have the worst news for you.

You cats are burgers.

Do you think, do you think

this is a dumb idea, but I thought about this with the cats because

Zip and Buster I got cremated.

But then Wally and Irma, I'm like, is there, oh no, I have to go to the bathroom again.

It's going to be fine.

It's everything is fine.

Okay.

It's okay.

Get your, like,

get your moral quandary out, and then you can, you can, like, say this, and then you can be thinking about it while you're taking shit.

I don't know if that's going to happen either.

Okay.

I'm going to try my damnest to make it happen.

If, do you think that there'll be a world in the future where a strand of hair, you're dead in the grave, but your bone can bring you back to, you know what I'm saying?

Like, they can just bring you back.

Like kind of a Jurassic Park/slash AI sort of very much an AI moment.

Right.

But then that's also the thing like the nature of consciousness.

Because we've never solved the hard problem of consciousness.

Like, would that actually be you, or would this be a simulacrum of you that has a different consciousness that has your memories, but sure was not actually your continuation of your own life.

But I'm saying, like,

is it worth it to not cremate things because of that?

Or maybe they can get it from cremation.

I can go to the bathroom.

Go think about it, Mitch.

It's interesting.

Have a think in there on that.

All right, he'll solve it.

We'll be back.

The diarrhea break.

All right, we're back from Pope Watch to Poop Watch.

Mitch, how you doing?

There was some smoke.

Wow.

And let me tell you how it came out.

Me grabbing the bars in the fucking bathroom and fucking

like fucking.

Like an Olympic sport?

Yes.

What's going on in there?

It was really hard to get anything going there.

Now, is this based on what we ate or this is the shot or it's the combo?

I think it's a combo of everything going on.

I got some water.

Are you generally stopped up?

Is that the issue?

Yeah, I'm stopped up a lot, yeah.

But also the shot makes you stopped up.

Oh, okay.

Because, yeah, it made me feel

some more water, some more diet.

I took some Senna last night and took

Senna and some, what's it called?

Magnesium.

Okay.

Citrate.

Magnesium citrate.

Have you ever messed around with like a bena fiber or something?

You got a fiber supplement?

I got citrusel-wags.

I'm trying to get things going.

Guys, this is like being in Colombia in the 80s.

I haven't heard of a lot of those.

You know what else I thought about in there?

Yeah, this is great that you've had your time.

I went off and I had a think.

I had a good long think.

And I do, a part of me does feel like maybe I shouldn't, you know, incinerate myself or Wallingham in case there is some sort of great resurrection at some point within the world.

Oh, right.

But also, do you ever think that, like,

do you ever think that you know the idea of hell which i'm afraid of i'm afraid of the devil but do you ever think you were talking about like how modern like future generations will see us and now we've talked about consciousness getting uploaded do you think we'll ever get like future generations if you have that consciousness you think they could like upload it into a hell you know what i'm saying like a hell program that's interesting you just kind of picked pitched a uh you know like a philip k dick sort of short story there i i think it's and also maybe if it's like your own thing of like i mean maybe we're in it now by the way oh fuck It could be, but then also it's that sort of thing of like, you, you, you choose your own.

And if it's a self-hating person, they're going to put themselves into a worse and worse thing.

You know what I'm saying?

Oh, you did get a lot of thinking done.

I got a lot of thinking.

A little more pooping during the okay here.

Coming back in with some dark stuff.

I can't guarantee that, but but but I'm saying if you like if you can upload consciousness, if that becomes a thing, can't you just upload someone into a hell?

Going back to your original thing.

First off, I would say, like,

who knows what the future would be if, like, you're suggesting some sort of great resurrection, like at some point, a future society decides, like, hey, people who have previously died actually is the correct ethical thing to do, or we're just going to do it for an

extra bone.

We got a wager bone.

But what you're saying is, like, how, like, how do we even know that that's going to be the source of it?

Like, maybe there is some other thing of, like, hey, we've discovered some other dimension that allows us to fold time where we can kind of, you know, pull his consciousness from a different reality or something like that, or from a different timeline.

Who fucking knows?

So, I don't know if like physically preserving your remains is what will result in you potentially being resurrected.

Maybe you should get cremated for that reason alone.

Maybe that too.

But the other thing I was going to say is like, I could see a point where future societies decide that, like, hey, we should, if we're going to resurrect people, they should have to atone for the sins that they're going to be punished.

And we're going to apply the strict sort of standards of our future society to how they lived in their time.

And they're going to upload them to hell.

And they might get uploaded to hell.

Purgatory, Microsoft Purgatory, something like that.

Man, hell, like a Microsoft hell.

Like, you know, you're in hell, but you see a Microsoft hell.

You're just quippy.

No, that is.

Quick bites, little quick bites of hell.

That's horrible.

Quibby wags.

A quibby hell?

Oh, my God.

Quibby was hell.

Yeah, quibby was hell.

Quibby was hell.

A go 90 hell.

You can watch my torture in a whole new.

You turn your phone 90 degrees.

Shit.

Yeah,

I think I'd go the cremation route just to be safe.

Get expirated.

There was a guy who, I think it was a road rage incident, and he got shot.

He was like an upstanding citizen, whatever.

And then his family,

because I guess the guy who shot and killed him in the road rage incident obviously was up on charges.

And the family had an AI

like testimonial, video testimonial of the guy made for him to sort of say...

a nice sentiment towards the man who killed him and the judge watched it and felt a little more sympathetic to the defendant.

And it's super eerie to watch because it's like the guy who died, and he's like, In another life, maybe you and I could be friends, and something like that.

Yeah, and even that to me, I'm like, that's a bridge too far with this shit to me.

There's gonna be a lot of weird shit we witness in

before we kick it.

Wages, hopefully.

I mean, hopefully, we make it that long.

Who knows?

I'm ready to go.

Yeah, I'm ready to go.

I don't mind.

I don't mind.

A fridge to terabithia was a thing.

Is that a bridge to terabithia?

Is that basically like a lion witch in the wardrobe type bullshit?

Yeah, Millie, can you explain a bridge of terabithia for us?

Yeah.

What do you kids call it?

I don't know.

I think it was like, I think it was in that sort of like linking our world to a fantasy world.

I think that's what it was.

Something like that, yeah.

But I never saw it.

Are you worried about hell?

You worry about these things?

Is this the cat hello?

I mean, this new thing that, you know, who knows how strict this future society will be?

Will they judge Wally for eating a tuna fish?

You know what I mean?

Who knows?

Will they send Wally to some sort of cat hell?

Well, that's another thing.

Like, are we ever going to reach?

You're eating him anyway.

Don't worry about it.

Are we ever going to reach a point where it was like there's going to be, because right now, the sort of approach towards nature is like, we don't intervene really.

Like, we'll maybe preserve some species, but for the most part, like, yeah, the food chain, all that sort of stuff,

the circle of life, that will just kind of like exist on its own in the wild.

Will there ever be a point where people are like, well, actually, we should intervene to ensure that there's ethical behavior among other life forms?

Like, I don't know.

Who knows?

Look, it was a big, it was a thinker and a stinker in there.

Good for you.

Good for you.

A lot going on in there.

Yeah.

I feel a little bit better, hopefully.

I think a third might give you closure.

Let's trilogy.

A third you might come back at and be like, I figured out what God is.

Head come shitter.

Let's talk a little bit about, because we're, you know, we were talking about Wally and Irma Burgers earlier.

You had to, okay, sure.

Let's talk about cats in general because I feel like we got a lot, we got a lot of cat parents in here.

Amelia, Mitch, obviously, Wally and Irma.

And Gareth,

you're a cat dad.

Yeah, my cat's named Jose.

I love him.

He's my everything.

And when I leave town, it's like the worst, hardest thing.

I feel like a bad parent because I basically have cat sitters come and look after him more than I'm there.

And I have someone stay in my place so he feels comfortable.

But definitely when I come back, I feel like he's, you know, there's, he's a little mad for a minute.

I had to leave Wally Norma for three months when I was in Toronto.

I hated it.

It was rough.

It was rough.

I hated it.

Yeah, see, I'm gone for so like long stretches, like three-ish weeks at a time.

And I, you know, towards the end, I'm just, it is crazy how much I just, I'm like, can't wait to see my little guy.

When you return, I love it.

I feel the same way.

Yeah,

this is a question for everyone, I guess.

Like, when you return after an absence, are your cats like meowing up a storm?

Like, how are they reacting?

Why is they're going crazy?

Yeah.

Yeah,

he is right in.

I mean,

what happens is he comes over.

He kind of, I think, can't believe it.

And I'm, that might be me putting my own ego into it.

I mean, who wouldn't be shocked?

The king is back.

But he comes over and he's definitely a little like

overwhelmed by it.

And then

he kind of like...

there's a little bit of a distance and then he's like my shadow for the next week.

Wow.

While he kind of adjusts and comes back.

And I mean, pretty much like we have a routine.

He sleeps with me every night.

He started to sleep on the like, like my bed's up against a wall.

And, you know, for a while, he slept like on the other side of me next to the wall, which is great because I could get up and piss.

And then he like started to want the side closest to the floor.

So now I sleep on the inside like the cat should.

And now when I get up to not disturb him, I kind of like slink under.

It's like insane.

I slink under the blankets to like get out.

I do the same thing.

And I'm like, what is this?

Crazy.

I got two of them.

So it's even more of an obstacle course.

Yes.

But I'm like, this is not okay.

I got a video here of me coming home after three months.

Do you want to hear how they react?

They're not saying hi, that's cute.

That's me saying hi.

This is it.

Awesome.

Sounds more like a drop than the drop.

It is a

Look at them.

They go crazy.

It's really cute.

I mean, they know.

They know.

They love you.

They love you.

Yeah.

I love them.

No, they get a bad rap for being like, whoa, that the fuck at the end there.

Irma.

Irma.

They demand answers.

No, they get a bad rap for not being as affectionate as dogs.

But I really find like my cats.

Those are people who are fucking dumbasses.

I got to tell you, when people are like, you just never had a cat, you don't know how affectionate they are.

People, because people are like, oh, well, dog will come to the door, but they come to the door to the door.

Come to the door, absolutely.

And then, also, like, it's like cats also will go and do their own thing, which is good.

Yeah.

It's nice that they go and sleep somewhere else.

You don't want someone who's around you all the time.

It's less pressure.

It's like the person is like, what's up today?

Yeah.

We're just hanging out.

Yeah, we're just hanging.

You don't have to play.

Yeah.

There's no plan.

Yeah.

You don't need that constantly.

I agree.

I like it.

Mitch, your cats love you that much and you want to turn them into burgers.

I don't want to turn them into burgers.

That whole burger thing just ages so poorly after that video.

I don't want them to be burgers.

I was, my fear is that he would eat the burgers.

Well, why did you offer him the cat?

It's just the whole thing.

I'll tell you, my head's spinning.

I'm, but you'd love their meowing when you're home.

You're serving them as food.

It's just I would eat burger wag before I would eat burger wag.

Whoa, a little wig goo.

Now we're talking.

I think I'd be all right with being eaten if I

like, like, no, I'm not saying like like I'd want that to be the case but like I think I'd be all right with being eaten.

It sounds like you you what you want from this is being alive as I eat you.

Oh, that's the dream.

How is it how's it tasting, buddy?

Feet first, please.

I want to savor this.

Like

Ray Liota at the end of Hannibal.

Oh, yeah.

Crazy.

I remember stuff.

Being in the movie theater watching that and being like, this is weird.

I remember this as a boy.

This is like very weird what I'm watching.

I'm enjoying what's happening.

Yeah.

It was because I I was what, like 16 or 17 or whatever when that movie came out.

Maybe older.

I don't know.

I forgot when Hannibal came out.

Yeah.

2000?

Is that a good guess?

It was.

Yeah.

It was something like the, you know, but high science of the lambs, obviously, such a huge, like, kind of mainstream hit.

And there's some extraordinarily dark stuff in that, but it's like not as imaginatively.

Well, they did that.

And then they were like, I mean, it's like anything, you know, then they're like, we got to get, we started, got to get fucked up now.

Yeah, it's like making Saw 4.

It's like, yeah, we hype this.

Yep.

You know, yeah.

Yeah.

You want to know when it came out?

Year I graduated, 2001.

Wow, how about that?

I was 18 years old or turning 18 years old when I came out.

Oh, those are 19.

Turning 19 years old.

Wow.

That's not important.

No, it is.

It came out in 2001.

Hand it up.

Let's take a break.

This show is sponsored by Liquid IV.

Wages, it's the dog days of summer as I sit here next to Jemmy.

It's hot and you got to stay hydrated.

You know how I stay hydrated?

How's that?

With a liquid IV.

I take liquid IV every night, a strawberry liquid IV.

I mix it into some water.

I drink it down and I'm feeling good.

I'm feeling hydrated.

I'm going to bed a happy little Mitch.

Having to transition from summer shenanigans to the focus needed in the fall should be illegal, but you can ditch the glitch with zero sugar and zero crash from Liquid IV's new energy multiplier, Sugar-Free Hydrating Energy.

It's scientifically formulated to support physical energy, hydration, focus, mood, and social stamina.

Wise, you know what I love about Liquid IV?

I'm getting all those electrolytes.

I'm getting what my body needs.

And you know what?

I'm not getting a giant sugar rush.

I'm not getting all those calories from sugar.

Especially not from the new sugar-free hydrating energy, which is perfect.

for fall.

Liquid IV's new energy multiplier can help you boost hydration and energy without the jitters or crash of traditional energy drinks.

It's perfect for your gym bag, work lunch, carry-on, or wherever you need that perfect boost of energy.

Whether you're fueling up for a workout, a long day of travel, or just trying to avoid an afternoon slump, Liquid IV's new energy multipliers keep you hydrated and energized.

Plus, it comes in two new delicious flavors, Wags.

Sugar-free energy strawberry kiwi and sugar-free energy blackberry lemonade.

Wow.

Just one stick and 16 ounces of water hydrates better than water alone, Wags.

Powered by LIV Hydro Science, an optimized ratio of electrolytes, essential vitamins, and clinically tested nutrients that turn ordinary water into extraordinary hydration.

Three times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink, eight essential vitamins and nutrients, and always non-GMO, vegan, gluten-free, dairy-free, and soy-free.

Ditch the glitch with zero sugar and zero crash from Liquid IV.

Tear, pour, live, more.

Go to liquidiv.com and get 20% off your first order with code DOE BOYS at checkout.

That's 20% off your first order with code DOEBOYS at liquid IV.com.

Do it.

Hey, buddy, with prices going up on just about everything lately, dealing with money can be stressful.

Trying to manage subscriptions, track spending, and cut costs can feel overwhelming.

Luckily, Rocket Money can relieve some of that stress and help you feel confident in the financial decisions you make, Wags.

Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

Wow.

If you've got a goal you'd like to save for, Rocket Money can analyze your accounts to find the best time each month to put extra money aside.

Get alerts if your bills increase in price, if there's unusual activity in your accounts, if you're close to going over budget, and even when you're doing a good job.

Rocket Money's 5 million members have saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions, with members saving up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features.

Wow.

Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money.

Go to rocketmoney.com slash Doughboys today.

That's rocketmoney.com slash Doughboys.

RocketMoney.com slash Doughboys.

Let's talk donuts because

that's the order of the day.

Where are donuts in everyone's hierarchy of treats?

Because I was thinking for myself, just to answer my own question, I think they're pretty high.

Like, ice cream is number one.

Donuts might be

ice cream.

Donuts might be two or three.

I don't know.

I think they're maybe in the podium.

I mean, here's the thing with this is, I think this is every adult's journey with donuts.

It's like when you're a child, a donut is a breakfast thing.

Yes.

And then now, and even back then, I would get a bagel and then like it would almost be like a dessert back then is I'd have like a bagel or a breakfast sandwich sandwich and then I would have a donut which I was a fat kid but like yep it wouldn't affect adults but like uh it's that sort of thing of of like I'd still have it as the dessert but I sometimes could just have it as a breakfast and as an adult I don't want a donut for breakfast almost ever unless it's like I need to eat something and there's a donut I'm gonna eat it but the taste of it when you're comparing it to like

When I'm comparing even to like cake or something, I'm like, I like donuts more than cake.

I do too.

I like donuts more than ice cream too.

Wow.

Yeah, I do.

I don't know.

I I would think it probably is number one for me.

As number one.

Probably.

As a sweet treat.

As a sweet treat.

You're really good.

Because I'm not big on like,

you know, sweet sweets.

Like that to me is never right.

Like, but that in what just happened in there, I could do that fairly regularly and feel okay about it because it is, it's like just sweet enough to be a treat, but also enough substance to feel like actual food.

I could not do that.

I feel like complete shit, obviously.

I know.

You're having a reaction.

I'm having a hard time.

It's just the sugar, just you feel how, especially if you're tasting, we're tasting like 18 donuts

we did.

But there was a bite in there wise that transferred me back to little young Mitch.

And

there was one donut when I bit it, and I'll save it.

You had a time-traveling donut, but

I had a Ratatouille moment where

I ate the donut.

I'll just say it.

The chocolate frosted or chocolate raise.

You were highlighting.

I was really something was happening.

I was kept going back to it, and I was like, this is just such a good tasting donut.

And the chocolate was like, it had like a nice darker chocolate taste to it, and it wasn't too, too sweet because a lot of the donuts were very sweet.

Yes.

And it was just, it was perfect.

A bite of a memory.

A bite of a memory.

And it was back on the Toddler Sports Network.

Yeah.

Well, yes.

I was fucking a star back then.

The donut cake.

Just, it was just a, it was a classic, great donut and well-made.

And

it was a great bite.

They are great.

Yeah, they're just great.

I really like donuts.

Like you, Mitch, yes, it was a thing that I most associate with Sundays because it was like a Sunday treat in my household.

We get like a but like for a while we were doing bike rides.

We'd ride the button ride a bike at the donut shop, get 12 donuts, but then it eventually just became a thing where it's just like it was,

you know, it was just an indulgence that we would have on weekends.

How far was the bike ride?

It was a donut shop like two doors down.

No need the bike.

You live above us.

No, my dad would make us work for it.

He was a my dad was

an avid cyclist.

So like he rode his bicycle to work for many years.

Can I guess what type of bicycle he rides the most?

Unicycle, fucking clown ass dad.

Piggy ass.

Oh boy.

You know, we had a guy.

He did the piggy thing.

No, in fact, a clown ass dad.

We had a guy called We're Here to Help.

Yeah.

Who

he basically, that's what he would do.

He was trying to eat like every

donut, every donut place going on jogs, like in the New England area.

He would drive his car, stop his car, then go for like 10 miles, find a donut place, put it in his backpack, and then go home and like enjoy it and film it.

It was like, yeah.

To me, the one that takes me back is the regular glaze to me was the one in there where I was like, yeah, that's just the classic.

It's a a classic, and it was well done.

It's a clean,

not overwhelming,

just a little glass on it.

And this is a classic spot.

We're talking about Randy's Donuts, which was founded in 1952.

And Inglewood got it.

I was going to get to it, Mitch.

It was founded in 1950.

No, it's fine.

I got excited about it.

I got excited.

Look, here's the thing.

I went to the Big Donut.

That donut really is big as fuck.

It's huge.

It's a fucking big ass donut.

You been to the Big Donut?

I used to work.

When I first moved here, I would work remodeling houses and it was right down there.

Wow.

And I would, and it was amazing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

How, can we ask you quickly?

I didn't know this about you.

This is great.

Yeah.

How would you remodel this studio?

Would you get rid of the

toilet?

That would be a toilet.

That's a break.

Gettable.

So there's no breaks.

I don't know.

By the way, I should point out I was the worst construction worker in the world.

Wow.

I was genuinely like the one where they were like, clean that up and then go to the dump.

But

what I would do is probably, you know what I'd like to do?

This all could be a window right here.

And I'll let the people in when they walk in, really open it up.

Because I'm always like, hey, we should get these curtains closed so we're not distracted.

I don't get too distracted.

No.

But you're saying,

I like seeing it.

Make it in the back.

I've been by your podcast a number of times.

Yeah, yeah.

There is a little bit of a, it does feel like a little, you'll record and you'll go and you're like, oh, it's sunny.

You know, so

Vegas.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

I think that's not a bad idea.

I love that.

I would do that.

That's all I got.

And it'll be about $100,000 for me to do the job.

And I'm not good with glass.

Randy's Donuts, 1952, Inglewood, California, is when it was founded near LAX Airport, originally called Big Donut Drive-In and then renamed in the 70s under new ownership.

Big Donut Drive-In is a pretty good damn name.

Randy's Donuts, I guess.

It's a pretty good name, and I think there's a lot of-there are still some Big Donut Drive-Ins, I think, elsewhere in Southern California, but Randy's, there was just the one for many years, known for its massive donut sign on its storeroof, which is about 32 feet or roughly 10 meters in diameter.

And it is a tourist destination frequently referenced in pop culture.

In 2015, Randy's was acquired by casino magnate Mark Calagian, who has turned it into a franchise chain.

So it was

for 60 years of its history, it was just the one store.

And then

now in the past 10 years, it has become a franchise chain.

I don't know if I've ever been to the original big donut location.

I have like a weird memory that I had been there once before, but I'm not sure if I have.

But it is, it's near LAX.

It's near LAX and it's a huge donut.

And right off the 405 freeway, which is

heavily trafficked.

Nothing like landing there and then be like, cool, more hell.

According to Randy's website, they have over 50 locations, 16 of which are in South Korea.

50?

50, yeah.

They have really expanded.

16 of them are in South Korea and the Philippines, so they've got international as well.

So we got Mars Attack.

Mars Attacks aliens.

Did they grab the big donut?

Mars attacks.

It is referenced in Mars Attacks.

Hands off, you little fuckers.

It's referenced in Iron Man 2.

It's, of course, referenced in The Simpsons a number of times.

Hands off to Iron Man as well.

I don't want him to.

Yeah, Iron Man, don't touch it.

You leave those to us, sir.

So I went.

Palmer can touch it.

Yesterday, I did go to the original Inglewood location, and I also went to a nearby chain location in Culver City right afterwards just to see how that compared.

And then today we had this big order of to-go donuts.

So we've had the full Randy's experience, and we'll represent that on the podcast.

But yes, the Inglewood donut really is big.

What I'll say, and Gareth, I'm wondering your take on this, but like there are these landmark LA establishments

and

we get asked about restaurants all the time.

I always tell people like, don't bother going to Pinks, which is the hot dog stand.

I'm just like, the hot dogs are whatever, and it's not that cool of a lot of them.

The line is not always indicative of worth.

Exactly, yeah.

But the Randy's donut, I actually think it is kind of cool to go because that donut, again, it's really big as fuck.

It's a huge donut.

And you're looking up at that and it's just like, man, it's kind of cool to see.

I agree.

I think like it is one of those things, you know, when you like, cause I moved here, obviously, when I first moved here, there were just certain things where you're like, what is that?

And then finally going to those places, they are.

There's, you know, and then it's like, what has happened now to what you're saying with 50 locations in the last 10 years?

The places get expanded and franchised and all that.

But really, when there is like an original flagship place of something like that that's on the map, it is interesting.

Yeah.

And the donuts are unbelievable.

I really think they are.

It's justifiably a landmark.

Can I go back to the Mars attacks aliens for a second?

Yeah.

Just thinking of how rude they are.

Yeah.

That they come here, they see the big doughnut, which is beautiful,

and they decide to destroy it.

I just

don't understand us.

That is also

they hate us for our freedom.

It's the same thing that happened with Afghanistan in the 2000s.

I mean, they hate us for our freedom.

They hate our freedom.

Osama and the aliens are.

That's what it's very similar.

They're a very similar type.

Yeah, absolutely.

But how can you not see that big donut and just think, that's cool?

It is cool.

They're nasty.

Yeah, no,

we do not welcome them.

No, this show is against them without question.

Yeah.

The Englewood one was hopping yesterday, midday.

Which one was the Englewood, the original location?

I was like, there were a lot of people there, a lot of people taking photos.

There was a a point where I was like, I group texted us.

I was like, maybe I'll try to take a pic of all the tourists taking selfies.

And then I realized how many kids were there.

I was like, I don't want to be the middle-aged man taking a photo of a bunch of children, I don't know.

So I decided not to.

Call me next time.

I'm fine being there.

I actually love it.

I relish it.

I don't even have it.

I don't even text it to anyone.

I'm just like, I want people nervous around me.

But there were a lot of people there.

And there's a K-line stop now, the new

train line.

And right by there, and there are tourists just walking from the train station straight to the Randy's.

So it is a destination.

They have a seasonal mango tahin raised donut and a maple longjohn I got, which we also got today.

I also got the hot buttercrumb latte.

And then it went over to the Culver City location, which is just a little kind of a kiosk strip mall location.

Double stop for you.

Yeah, you're really doing your homework.

Well, I was also like, I was like, look, I should make a pilgrimage.

I've been to the Randy's in the past, but it's been many years.

I was like, I should make a pilgrimage to the original for covering it because that's part of the Randy's experience.

So I'll just do that.

And I don't, I live in the west side, so I don't live too far from it.

It was a reasonable trip for me.

And then, like, on the way back, there was another Randy's.

So I was like, I'll just stop by there just to see how it compares.

I worked there for a month in preparation for this episode.

I didn't want to say it, but I, if we're really, I'm not trying to compete.

I know you did a lot, but I worked there for a month.

I worked there for one month in the back.

That's pretty damn good.

I mean, you know, I met Randy.

I told this story.

I don't have the exact quote in front of me, but this was a thing I read when I was doing my research is that Randy, the titular Randy's wife, saw the big donut.

She had a story of like coming to, I think moving to America and landing at LAX and seeing the big donut as she got off of her plane or as she was on the 405 freeway.

And then

her quote was like, I saw the big donut and I didn't realize I would marry that man someday.

Wow.

That's amazing.

Also, he should have been called the big donut.

That's what I'd be like, call me the big donut.

I guess he's like in his his scarface arrow.

He's like, he's the big donut.

Respect.

But that is really strange.

It's also what a way to know you're in America.

Right, right.

You're just like, okay, they are for real with this stuff.

There was that period in like the 50s where they were just building things that were just big versions of what the business was.

It was just like,

programmatic architecture, I think it's called.

And it's, yeah, it's just like there'd be like a big, a big hot dog.

And it's like, that's the hot dog place.

Okay, so that's my pitch on the headgum revamp.

You guys on top of it.

That's pretty good.

Two Joeboys figures.

I guess we could just stand up there and people think we're the big versions of ourselves.

You're going to the bathroom.

Well, that's strange.

One of the statues is always missing.

It's down the ladder again.

What's he doing?

The other one is definitely a statue just while you're standing there.

Oh, yeah.

I like the big thing.

I like the big thing, too.

It's fun.

The brown derby is a lot of fun.

Brown Derby is a lot of fun.

Rest in peace to the brown derby.

There's one in the old Disney, Disney Disney World.

Yeah, that's fun.

I like it.

Okay, so let me just run down the roster of donuts we got today, and then I'll also talk about some of the ones that I had in my own trips.

So we got the Maple Raised Churro, the Nutella Raised, Red Velvet Ganache.

Apple fritter, blueberry ice cake.

Apple fritter was one.

Emma's not here, but I asked Emma to pick out a donut.

She said apple fritter.

Blueberry ice cake.

Hold on.

You had already picked apple fritter.

Yeah, but I said like, Emma, you pick one, and she said, I'll also do apple fritter.

So we got an apple fritter.

So she said apple fritter, but she did say a second one, which we didn't get.

I guess we could have gotten two apple fritters, but we didn't finish.

No, she said, no, she said a second donut.

Wait, she did?

Yeah.

What was the second one?

What was it?

I look it up.

Blueberry ice cake, chocolate buttermilk,

chocolate chip cake, chocolate raised, devil's food.

That was Amelia's pick.

Amelia's choice.

Millie's choice.

Millie's choice.

Millie's choice.

Glazed Crondie.

Crondi is their version of a...

What else do they call the some other place has a thing they call the croissant donut?

It's I forget what that branding is, but this is their croissant donut.

That's their branding.

Glazed old-fashioned maple wire, matcha raised, pink raised with sprinkles, pink sprinkles, ice cake.

I can't believe we ate all this.

Strawberry jelly-filled, and then the mysterious Randy's choice.

We'll get to the Randy's choice in a second.

Oh, boy, howdy, will we?

Emma, I love an apple fritter or a strawberry frosted.

That's what she said.

Oh, I didn't see the strawberry frosted.

Well, she said or, so I picked apple fritter.

And then I wrote a bunch down and I said, if if Garth doesn't pick.

This is insulting.

And I'm going to be honest with you, this is the other crazy thing.

I did have Wayne's World 2 on at the time.

So I don't know if that was.

Must be a Freudian Super Series.

You were so sad when you got here.

You're like, oh, that guy Gareth.

Oh.

Not Garth.

We moved it an hour earlier for him.

That's not as okay.

No, this is.

This is this is this.

This was, this was, this was perfect.

I was very excited to eat here because I have, don't have a ton of experience with it.

And I'm just going to to say right off the bat, Wax,

the donuts were good.

The donuts were really good.

So

I grew up in Southern California.

And I'm familiar with the kind of place that Randy's is.

Like

the place we went to is Martha's Donuts in Long Beach all the time.

It was the exact same sort of thing.

Like I probably these donuts were just,

they were pretty much one-to-one with what I remember.

And there are a lot of these places in Southern California that are, you know, they have a pink cardboard box and they're, there, a lot of them are owned by Cambodian immigrant families.

And they're, they're independent companies, but they're, a lot of them are sourcing their ingredients from the same place.

So the, the donuts are all pretty similar.

I like, I'm, I'm used to this style of donut, and I think Randy's executes it at a very good level.

Like, it's like, like, as they've expanded.

The one thing I will say, you hear, like, casino magnate acquiring this place.

It's not the kind of person you want to like give the benefit of the doubt.

But it does.

What I've read about this guy, Mark Kalegan, is that he seems to understand the appeal of Randy's and is like, we're going to to keep the donuts cheap.

We're going to keep the donuts the way they are.

Like, we're not going to make these, this gentrified, like, $8 donut.

We're going to keep having the same menu that Randy's is known for.

We're just going to have more places.

And I do like that approach.

Yeah.

I think it also is so funny where like we live in the time where it's the genius business move is to be like, I'll keep the thing that succeeded greatly the exact same way.

Right, right.

Shrewd move, magnate.

But the tendency is to fuck with these places.

And that that happens very often.

The one thing they have added is more of a, like more espresso drinks.

They've expanded the coffee side of the menu.

And the burritos and stuff.

Is that all new, or that was always there?

Yeah, I'm not sure if that's always...

We got a lemonade today.

Look at the separation on this.

That's not great.

Yeah, no.

That's

oil vinegar there.

Burritos are new?

Okay.

So added some more savory items, too.

But let's start with the donuts because that's the whole reason to go to a donut shop.

I mean, I thought they were all pretty great.

I was a fan of, I mean, like, I'm a a big Apple Fritter guy like Emma.

I like that quite a bit.

The Maple Race Churro, which I, I, I, I'm looking at that one.

I was like, all right, this feels like this will be a gimmick, but the texture from the churro sat in really nicely with the maple.

I think it was.

It was a hat on a hat, maybe, but then it did work.

It worked great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We all got a bit of the churro too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It was, I, I, I, I very much enjoyed that one.

It did, it looked gimmicky, but it was good.

Yeah, it did.

And the Krondi is actually one I got yesterday, and it's really dense.

It's really heavy.

Like, I can't imagine taking a full one of those to the dome because it's also, it's like, it's, it's a, it's a, it's a big boy.

Yeah.

It's a substantial sum bitch.

So I'm like, I, I, I took out like a corner of it and, you know, it, it, it's, it's flaky, it's layered.

Um, it's nicely sweet, but not too sweet.

But I, I, like, I thought it, I thought it was uh delightful.

I thought it was fantastic.

Yeah.

I really like the crondy.

And I didn't think I would.

I don't normally like the croissanti donuts or anything like that.

Here was my big surprise.

I said this when we were eating it, but

I, uh, the um chocolate, what was the chocolate butter bar?

Chocolate butter milk.

The chocolate butter milk.

Which was a bar.

And the apple fritter.

Usually these are like two like star items.

And then I actually thought those were kind of the more on the weaker end.

I liked the fritter, but I've had better fritters, even at like kind of like chainy places before.

I thought this one was just okay.

But I thought all the donuts were fantastic.

And like I said, that chocolate raised, a chocolate frosted, as I call, as they're called at Duncan's, was, I loved it.

It was fantastic.

Let me go back to yesterday, real quick, because I got a Maple Long John yesterday at the original location, and we also.

Or after taking pictures of the children at that time.

Were you celebrating?

Got away with it.

I'm sorry.

You knew it was too weird.

You had the children take a picture of you on their phone.

You mind if I get one of you, the kids and me together?

So, who are you?

I have a podcast.

Do you want us to send that to you?

No, it's fine.

Nah, it's fine.

Don't delete it.

I had the Maple Long John, and we also got that today.

And the one I had yesterday was fantastic.

I was like, this is, and that's one of my favorite donuts.

To me, that's one of the top guys is the Maple Long John.

I disagree, but

I like that you like it.

It's one of my personal favorites.

So I'm going to be, you know,

I've got a careful eye towards judging it.

And I thought it was really well executed yesterday.

Today it got a little bit like lacquered to the roof of the donut box.

It got boxed.

Sometimes

it got boxed.

so it wasn't a great version of it but i i love the one i had yesterday and the the the mango taheen one which i was very skeptical towards it was filled with mango goo and then it also had like a you know like a mango glaze on top and then some taheen for a little bit of spice and i'm a bit of a heat seeker i i thought was also fucking great i was eating that

one i know i you we didn't have it today with today's order but the one

that you loved it so much that you didn't have you couldn't tell us to get one for us too i don't know i thought you figured you'd order it if you wanted it fucking kept it to you you kept that little secret to yourself i wasn't trying to hoard it

we don't we don't get to try it

only garth me and garth thank you me and garth didn't get to try it yeah we're furious

that sounds good it was no i like i was like i'll take a bite of this basically for the podcast that's why i ordered it just because like this feels weird and then i ended up eating the whole thing because it was it was yummy Don't they end up putting like the little wax paper on the donuts sometimes so it doesn't roof lacer?

They will sometimes

didn't happen to do it.

Just thing they didn't do it.

They probably didn't know how the spotlight would be on them today.

Yeah.

There were some Joe Regulars.

Randy's shaking in his fucking boots right now.

Yeah, or grave.

I don't know how old.

Yeah, he might be dead.

By the way, if he has passed away, we should bring him back.

That's a perfect one.

Make burgers, Adam.

Make Randy Burgers?

Yeah.

Gravest insult.

The Long John to me is the most nostalgic one.

Right.

Like, that really does remind me of being a kid.

Like, like you were saying, it's the Sunday morning.

You did a sleepover.

someone has brought a big thing of donuts.

The Long John to me is the quintessential donut.

Yeah.

And the disappointment when there'd be cream in the Long John, I always felt too.

Yeah, we went no cream.

Yeah.

I just want to say Randy might be in some sort of donut hell where donuts are dunking him into a coffee.

You never know.

God, you are really good at inverting what the system will be based on today's world we live in.

The cats are eating us.

Randy's getting dunked.

Randy's getting dunked into a coffee, a boiling hot coffee wagon.

And then getting eaten by the donut.

That can't be nice.

But that's what he gets.

That's your punishment.

Suitably ironic punishment.

Yes.

For creating a donut job.

That's why the devil is hyped so much.

He's just good at this.

He's very good at it.

On the day of the new pope, I don't know if we should talk.

The devil's a little bit, the devil has a slight period.

If things were not good this past week, it's because the devil gets a, there's no pope.

You know what I'm saying?

So the devil is right.

The devil's got a little bit of power, and then now

the window is out now.

Yeah.

While we're talking about the devil, we should talk about his famous food.

The devil's food, of course.

Are you talking about Millie's choice?

Yeah.

I'm talking about Millie's choice, the devil's food.

You know, this is not my favorite.

The chocolate on chocolate.

That is a fine execution of it.

Wow, Millie's choice just got flushed.

I don't know.

What did you think, Amelia?

I loved the devil's choice.

You love it.

I love Millie's choice.

You also love a cake donut in general.

Versus a raised donut.

Yeah, I don't know what it is about cake donuts, but maybe I think about Duncan munchkins.

And that's what I grew up eating.

So I always have a fondness for the chocolate or the white pack.

You got to call them little donuts now, I believe.

Little donuts.

Oh, okay.

Wrong term.

They have a lobby now.

I thought of the other cake donuts.

You thought the chocolate chip cake was a little plain, Mitch.

But I was like, I like that.

Oh, I liked it.

That's, again, a thing that to me, it feels like I have nostalgia for.

It's just like sometimes we just get a plain donut in the box.

And I kind of liked it.

It's just like, you know, what's the last donut place we did?

Remember, we got.

That's a great question.

We've done some, do you remember, Amelia?

Sidecar?

Sidecar donut we did in recent memory, and sidecar is like the gentrified donut place.

Voodoo Donuts, yeah.

Oh, those are good.

Voodoo Donuts, I think we did further in the past.

Sidecar is the last one we did, and we were giving it a hard time.

I feel like we revisited Krispy Kreme because they had something seasonal.

Oh, right.

We did do Krispy Kreme, but we weren't.

When we were eating Sidecar donuts, I just remember shitting on it and being like, fuck this.

And it was a very different attitude today.

Well, because

part of that is, again, it's just like, like, sidecar is presenting an upscale version of it.

Like, it's like, this is a premium artisanal donut.

We're going to charge you like $9

for our premium donuts.

And they're,

they're indulgent, but they're all a little ungopachka.

They've all got a little too much going on.

I got to say, the donuts today just fucking beat them.

A taste test, hands down, beat them.

I'd rather have the working class donut.

And that's the other thing I will say about going to the Randy's.

Like, yeah, there were a bunch of tourists there, but then there were also guys with just like, you know.

Yeah, you got it.

It's perfect for you.

You can hire them to like fan you and like massage your feet.

It's perfect.

The working class people.

She's your athletes for you.

There you go.

No, there were like, you know, there were like just like roofers who were waiting in line to get some donuts.

No, that's what I used to do.

We'd work and then we'd like literally at lunch and go get a couple donuts.

Yeah.

Probably not the best.

See, the chocolate, the devil's food.

I've questioned if he's ever held a hammer in his life.

Held a hammer?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Hammer brothers don't count if you're talking Mario.

What do you mean an actual hammer?

I'm a hammer brother.

You get what I'm saying.

You've actually held a hammer.

Have you held a hammer?

I have held a hammer.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's all right.

My dad is an incredibly talented woodworker.

Is he?

Yeah, yeah.

I've mentioned this to you a number of times.

Uh, but it was George, I, I, I, I, I love it.

Um, it was, uh, no, but it was kind of the, I will say, as a shitty little kid, he was always like, let me show you how to do this.

And I'd be like, I would be holding a hammer, brother.

I'd be like, I'm playing video games.

You know, he'd be like completely uninterested.

And then I look back later, like later in life, I have to teach myself these skills from like YouTube videos.

And I'm like, I wish I had paid any attention to when my dad was trying to help me out.

My, my mom was like, you can't do wood shop in high school.

She was like, you can't do it.

She wouldn't let me do wood shop.

And then I'm like, that would be the most useful skill in the world to have.

There's so many classes you would swap for either learning how to cook, garden, or make.

300%.

Yeah.

No.

I mean, I don't think that I should swap these classes, but I would swap all my language classes because I just didn't learn anything.

I've never learned a language.

Yeah.

If I could hammer something.

Yeah.

I mean, this sounds like a very this size.

Sounds like a moto yellow.

It sounds like a moto yellow.

No, that's like a motor yellow turtle power.

But I'm like, if I gave up Latin for being able to like drill something, it would be.

I think that's the good swap.

Yeah.

Yeah, for sure.

I took keyboarding in high school, which you don't, you don't, do they even teach that anymore?

Typing.

I feel like kids just know how to do it.

I don't know.

Anyway, it's more like this now.

That's what I was going to say.

I wonder if there's probably a generation class.

Yeah, that doesn't necessarily know how to type like this.

Yeah.

I think it's got to be that.

You're not even going to need it anymore.

It's true.

Yeah.

It's going to be gone.

Anyways, the working class, going and getting a donut, like a,

you know what, the box of Joe from

Dunkin' Donuts and some munchkins.

If you're working a summer job and you're working on a deck or something, that's a great thing to have.

Oh, yeah.

Well, because

I do like the fact that Randy's...

Well, it's funny that it is that you say it's like a working class thing because it is a tourist destination too.

But the price point of the donuts is still low.

And it's still like

it's making the stuff on site, but it's like, you know, it's making the approachable, affordable version of it.

And as they've scaled up, as they've, they've added locations, they have not like, you know, made things more expensive or fancy or anything.

They've just maintained the same level of quality that they had.

We should talk about Randy's choice donut.

Yeah, so Randy's choice was, so

the number of donuts we ordered, I think, tallied to like 17 or something like that.

It wasn't quite 18.

And so it was like a dozen and a half.

I know why.

what happened.

Keep listening, people.

It was an odd number.

And I guess we got a Randy's choice.

Yes, because there was a vacancy in the box, they were like, well, to complete it, we'll just fill it in with a Randy's choice, which they charged us for and was included as Randy's choice on the receipt.

Now, we went through and we tried to catalog each of the donuts that we were given and each of the items on our order to figure out which of the donuts was the elusive Randy's choice

donut.

It turned out there just was no Randy's choice donut.

It just what Randy's choice was.

Randy's choice was that we've had enough to eat.

Yeah.

Yeah, Randy made a real decision on our behalf back there.

Which honestly, a good decision.

I don't think we needed the extra donuts.

It's the principal.

Yes.

Jared didn't want to send Amelia back to Pasadena to get it.

I don't think it's crazy to make her drive a half hour to go.

It's a justice

drive.

I agree with you.

It's the justice drive.

The amount of pushback from Amelia was shocking.

Crying.

Yeah, I just said, no, we don't have time.

You know how many justice drives are like, like, just for like,

I've done so much stuff to just be like, I was wronged for $1.50.

Never worked.

Go back to the end of the drive through.

You're waiting in a longer line.

And they're like, what can we help you with?

You're like, I have business at Window 2.

It's so stupid.

But there's a 7-Eleven near me.

I've told you this while I,

not to dox myself, but there's a 7-Eleven near me, and they charged me for an extra Gatorade once, and it still annoys me.

And I'm gonna steal a Gatorade from them at some point.

An adult man, I think you're safe from the doxing with a 7-Eleven being close.

Yeah, that's also a good point.

They've really opened up a lot of those.

They have.

Like, I know where he lives.

Everywhere.

I told this on the podcast before, but once I bought two ice cream sandwiches from the liquor store, this was just like last year, maybe two years ago.

That sentence is also pretty depressing.

I think you have held a hammer.

I bought a

construction reaction.

There's no nails, but you definitely held a hammer, good man.

A liquor store Thor.

I got two chip witches from the liquor store, and then I

got, I like saw the receipt and I realized he only charged me for one, but it was when I actually already left.

And so I went back and I knew the guy.

So I went back later and I got one chip witch and I like said, hey, charge me for two.

And he was like, well, I was like, oh, yeah, I got two last time.

You only charged me for one.

And he's like, Oh, good man, you're honest.

I said, Hey, and then I pointed up at God for some reason.

Wow,

every part of that was so lovely until the end.

I don't know why I did it.

Like, God's getting involved.

I'm gonna go to heaven for this one.

Also, that guy now is just like,

he thinks of you much differently.

He did that kind of weird, yeah.

Well, in the afterlife, when they're like, Well, you did beat a man with a hammer,

that chip witch shout out was pretty big.

I think think we didn't notice that one up here that was awesome i don't think i can handle beating a man with a hammer oh you'd be so visceral no once the first couple is tough and then you just fight through it but there's something about like you know what's gonna happen last episode of doorboys no one's in here just you i come in put a hammer on the table lock the door and we see what happens

do you think you think you would be able to take you think you would be able to if it's your your life is on the line and i gotta kill you with a hammer yeah what an ending that's crazy to think about i think i could take you out but i would not be happy about it.

And I'd be like, why did it come to this?

I think I would beat you, to be honest with you.

If I have the hammer,

locked door.

I locked the door.

I locked the door.

I locked the door.

I locked the door.

Just to be safe.

I locked the door.

I throw a hammer on the table.

Yeah.

And then it's, you know, then we're sitting and the hammer's on the table.

It's first to the hammer.

Yeah.

And you shouldn't have thrown it first of all.

But I think that I would be able to, I think I'd be able to crunch you against the wall and have you drop the hammer.

Crunch you against the wall is an interesting way to put it.

Yeah, that is interesting.

I don't know.

I feel like I would.

You don't have the room to run around in here.

I think I could quickly get the hammer, and I think it would go into a defensive position.

And I think also just having a weapon would be such an advantage in close combat that I think I'd probably

get to it first.

Let's say there's two hammers, and you each get a hammer.

If it's hammer versus.

By the way, this glass wall is paying for itself already.

And we're talking claw hammers.

So you could really do some damage.

Well, yeah, if you choose to go that side, sure.

So you've got a hammer, I've got a hammer, and we're just fighting each other.

We're hammer brothers.

We're hammer brothers.

Whoa.

That would be tough because I'd be so, I would, like, I would, I would know it would hurt so bad to get hit with a hammer.

Yes.

That would, like, really make it.

Look, the real answer is we'd both be crying.

I would be very scared.

Yeah, we'd all end up on the floor crying.

If I had to fight, like, I'd be very sad if I had to kill you with a hammer, and then if I had to fight you and you also had a hammer, I'd be very scared.

That's nice.

Would you be really sad?

That's nice to hear.

Kill my friend.

That's nice.

I can't tell what.

Think of a fucking monster.

I I can't tell.

I can't tell with him sometimes.

I think this is a really special moment.

Yeah, this is nice.

I said it was nice.

This is good before going into the Boston show to know that if he had to kill you with a hammer, there'd be some mixed emotions.

Yeah.

I'm probably going to get killed by someone with a hammer in the Knicks game when I'm wearing my Celtics hat, anyways.

It would be fine.

It's not a bad way to go.

I wouldn't coldly bludgeon you to death.

I would feel conflicted about it.

Yeah.

Like if I had to do that.

You're more of like a potions guy.

You slowly poison me.

A poisonous mist man.

I'd love to be a potions guy.

That is nice, too.

You're an apothecary.

Alchemist is an underused class.

There should be more alchemists and RPGs.

It's funny.

It's fun to mix potions.

And in real life, they're not enough potions going on.

But anyways,

Randy's choice.

That's how we got here.

It's a tough gear shift to go from potions back to Randy's choice.

But yes, because again, it felt like a donut did vanish upon us.

100 yeah that's a great wow well and i don't i mean i don't know if we're going to be able to get word to randy i mean i would imagine randy's donuts will hear about this but is randy dead i guess is the good big question you posed which i'm not sure i don't know i honestly my instinct is that randy's dead i believe that randy has passed away um but i i i don't have that in front of me i'll look it up yeah but it's a

Yeah,

the top line of this is that Randy's choice doesn't exist.

Yeah, we didn't didn't, we didn't get it.

No,

yeah, we didn't get one.

Ruben Knife had nice to have that mango donut.

It sucks that we didn't get it.

But anyways, mango donut was good.

The other thing I got in the, so I got the hot butter crumber

crumb latte, which was

better than I expected.

I worried it would be way too sweet.

That was delicious.

The mango lemonade, which I got at the Culver City location, was disgusting.

It was the worst thing I had for Randy's.

It was way too sickly sweet.

It was like a melted

starburst.

I obviously didn't drink very much of the strawberry lemonade, but but it was that sort of thing.

We were eating the donuts, donuts are already sweet, and then I was tasting this, and it was like, didn't taste sweet because of all the sweetness we were earning.

Your palate had been thrown so much.

Yeah, I'm afraid to, just with my stomach, I'm afraid to do this, but I'm going to give it another taste.

I thought it was like fine for a strawberry lemonade.

It was okay.

It was nothing, but like, it's also that sort of thing of like, what do you celery?

It should just be coffee, right?

Like, I think all the drinks.

It was.

It was for, so, you know, that is the thing.

That's probably where the magnate comes into play.

100%.

The one bad idea is the, it sounds like, is the Vegas magnate.

He's expanded all the drink stuff.

Yes.

Drink up, my boy.

I'm going to sip more of my potions.

Oh, my God.

No!

I should have guessed with the viscosity of this thing.

If we check the menu, we're like, actually, they do only serve coffee.

Oh, my God.

This is not a bad-tasting.

Do you want to?

I mean, it does not look appetizing.

Sure, it wasn't.

I want to rethink.

It's so

it's not mixed.

Yeah, it's not mixed.

You're going to find it to be very sweet.

It tastes very much like a strawberry.

You want to try it?

I guess we're all trying that.

You know, it kind of tastes.

Remember those.

What are those ice creams that?

Not ice creams, but they were like the ice, like the fruity ice treats when you were a kid.

They came in the long plastic.

Oh, yes.

You know, sometimes you just let those melt and

that's way better.

It kind of reminds me of one of those a little bit if you let it melt.

That's a little sweet for me, but it's way better than the mango one.

I wonder if he just put in too much syrup in the mango lemonade that he got me yesterday.

It's got chunks in it.

Yeah.

There's a little bit of strawberry chunks.

Or is my English mouth falling apart again

as I drink?

We should talk about the savory side.

So we did get a breakfast burrito.

Mitch, you got a breakfast burrito and you were kind enough to share it with me.

So I had half of that some bitch, and it was a lot better than I expected.

Yes, it was.

Kind of a lifesaver too when we were eating the the sweet.

I wish you had gotten something like that because it was helpful.

Having anything salty/slash/savory.

I was watching furious.

No, no, no.

No, it was.

It looked good, though.

Yeah, not bad.

Jason, you got one of these too.

I'm going to say something that's very controversial.

Are you ready for this?

Yeah.

This is bad news.

People won't be happy.

Okay.

Breakfast burritos, overrated.

That's an insane take, Mitch.

I know.

I told you it it was going to be fucking controversial.

It's controversial.

Still.

A breakfast sandwich is better.

Breakfast burrito, they make you feel like shit.

Boy, I feel like a breakfast burrito is less heavy than a breakfast sandwich.

I feel like it's generally less

here.

And I'll be sick of it.

Bacon egg and cheese on a beans in there.

That'll help.

Bacon egg and cheese on a croissant is a million times lighter than a broader.

Oh, I don't know.

I think I can't.

I can't cosign it.

Yeah.

I love the swing.

Yeah.

I like a breakfast sandwich, too.

I think that there's good good breakfast burritos.

Don't get me wrong.

I think to what you were alluding to, the burrito is a pocket for so many things that could never exist in between two slices.

The bee,

the rice.

I love burritos.

Well, tell that to your earlier statement.

A breakfast,

a burrito is my favorite.

I like burritos more than tacos.

I love burritos.

Breakfast burritos specifically,

you know.

I don't know.

I mean, I got a lot of people.

A lot of potato in there a lot of the time.

Amelia's.

Potato can be good.

A potato, I love it.

Amelia's backing me up a little bit here.

Oh, shit.

I couldn't disagree more.

Can't read her face.

I know Amelia pretty well, and she's 100% with me.

Don't talk into the mic.

Millie's choice, I guess, is the breakfast burrito, but I

there.

Look, just scrambled eggs on their own,

eggs benedict, a breakfast sandwich.

I want all of them before I want a breakfast burrito.

That's interesting.

Yeah, I don't agree, but I get it.

But I think lighter, to me, the burrito is lighter than the croissant, to me.

Really?

Yeah.

I agree.

Gut bombs.

I think it's just less bready.

Oh, it depends on how you construct it, though.

It depends on like what protein you're putting on there.

To Gareth's point, like, you know, what other components are part of it.

Like, yeah, if you're just getting like

egg, you know, bacon and like potato and like hash browns in there.

Like, yeah, that's, that's a dense meal.

But like, you can make it up a little bit.

Look at this thing.

Look at the bisect of this thing.

I remember but what but mitch what you're showing is this is not like this is not like hey this this place is known for their breakfast burrito this place has great iron this place has it as like an extra thing look i said it would be controversial i spoke my mind well i hope you feel lighter than when you went to the bathroom

you know what else i'm walking on air right here you know what else i like about the burrito can be a hand food or it could be a knife and forker that's the thing i was going to say because i like that side of it because you were comparing it to like you brought up eggs benedict that's a completely different experience like if if you're eating Eggs Benedict, you're eating a breakfast burrito.

These are completely different content.

Yeah.

You're going to be pissed.

Go for it.

I like breakfast tacos more than I like breakfast burritos.

That I'm fine with.

That's fine.

I don't hate that.

That's reasonable.

Well, I have no idea why.

I have no idea what to fucking expect of you people.

Up is down, down is up.

I can't eat with alchemists anymore.

I'd rather have a breakfast burrito than a breakfast taco, but I like breakfast tacos.

Those are great.

I don't think they're overrated.

The place we went in Texas, so long ago now, like our second year of December.

Emilia, we look it up.

Torches tacos?

Torchise tacos.

Great breakfast tacos.

Like those little Migas there.

Isn't that what they call the

taco?

Yeah.

And also.

They get a home state, too.

Homestate.

Yes.

Homestate.

Great breakfast tacos.

I like the breakfast where you get the tortillas.

You can make your own.

I also like that.

Oh, that's fun.

I like that.

Enjoyable.

Flour over corn.

A lot of fun.

Breakfast burrows are just overrated.

I'm sorry.

I hate it.

No one agreed.

I'm doubling down on this.

I'm doubling down.

You're asking for a future generation to put you in some sort of cybernetic hell where you're wrapping up in tortilla.

That's what

you eat them.

Your skin.

They're going to take your guts and your bones and put it as a side portion and your

skin tortilla.

Well, I have kind of already constructed human burrito in a way.

Whoa, now I got to go to the bathroom.

What just happened?

That said, I think it's fair.

If this was your breakfast burrito you had and someone's like, hey, you got to try this thing to see what all the fuss is about.

I could understand you being underwhelmed because

it was fine, but the tortilla was a little bit gummy.

It was clearly not fresh.

The interior components were pretty dry, and all they had was some tapatillo packets, which I, for the life of me, could not get open.

You did try the knife.

You had the knife.

I needed a knife.

You need a knife for them.

I opened it on my own.

I did it just with my own teeth, my chiampas, as they say in old, uh, merry old England.

Well, they don't have a lot of them, but the ones they do, they're sturdy.

The ones that hang around, they're workers, they're worker chompas,

they hang around.

I just force it open with my teeth there.

I thought the breakfast burrito was okay for, I think, for what it was.

We weren't expecting great things.

I think that, like,

okay, it makes sense that this is on the menu.

It's fine.

Yeah.

But breakfast burritos as a whole, I say this because I know there are others like me who will agree with me and back me up here.

A lot won't agree with me.

I wonder why he opens it up to breakfast burritos because that seems cost-wise like it would be adding a whole nother layer to what's already a pretty cheap, easy business model.

Yeah, and they have some other breakfast sandwiches there now too.

Again, I don't know

the exact timeline of when these things were introduced.

I do know specifically the drink menu was vastly different.

I blame the magnate for anything that I don't care.

It should be, yeah.

Always.

And I mean, definitely if you're going to if you're going to criticize this place, it's the stuff other than the donuts.

Like the banana matcha I got was, I thought was pretty bad.

And I like matcha.

I'm not someone.

Banana matcha sounds crazy.

Have you had anything like that before?

I've had matchas with like coconut or strawberries.

I haven't had specifically with banana, which is kind of the way I wanted to try it.

What happened there just a second ago?

I just went a little bit out of miniones.

Okay, yeah.

No, am I allowed to talk about what just happened?

Yeah, yeah, okay.

It's actually good.

It's good that you pointed it out.

Is this the thing nobody has the guts to bring up, and you guys are just letting it happen regularly?

Because someone needs to step in.

It's the craziest thing since the burrito tape.

It's actually helped me in a way.

I feel better.

The matcha I thought was,

I don't know.

It tasted a little bit

the hints of banana from it.

I just don't think it was a particularly good matcha.

And I think like it maybe needed more sweetness in order to work conceptually.

But as such, it just kind of tasted like

an off-putting matcha with a weird sort of fragrance or aura to it.

I don't know.

I thought it was pretty unpleasant.

You really did not like it.

It's not good.

Not good.

No, I, my girlfriend got me into matcha a little bit.

And then when you have one that's bad, it's the worst.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, so when you have a good one, you're like, oh, it was amazing, better than anything.

And then when you have a bad one, you're like, that's fucking horrible.

This was a subpar matcha.

And I, you know, they're also doing boba there now, too, which I'm not sure why they're doing that exactly.

Magnate.

It's got magnate written all over it.

How was your coffee?

Empty.

It was good.

It's empty now.

I loved it.

I thought it was really good.

Yeah.

I thought very good coffee.

I don't, I'm, I'm pretty.

I'm a pretty easy sell on stuff like that, though.

Only in the past couple of years have I started to pay attention, but it was good.

Nice, medium, good, good flavor, nothing crazy.

I take it black, so you really taste it.

So I liked it.

That was like me with like the coffee drink I got yesterday, the hot like latte, was like, this is legitimately like a good version of it.

And I also saw that, you know, the one store that I was going to, like a lot of their business, not the main store, a lot of their business was people just going in for coffee.

That's a good sound.

So,

but, but yeah, the other stuff, I don't know if I'd, if I'd even, I'd even bother bother with.

Like, would you ever go?

It's like, hey, I want a breakfast burrito as a breakfast burrito skeptic.

Even if you were, like, for whatever reason, you were craving one, you would never go here for a breakfast burrito.

No.

Yeah.

There'd be no reason to do it.

Yeah, no way.

Can I just say this?

Yeah.

Subpower, good on the links, not with the drinks.

Mitch, that was really good.

There we go.

Really well crafted.

You're back.

You are.

Back.

It's hammer time.

We've done the subpar thing before multiple times, I believe.

I think, yes.

What are the datasets?

10 years.

You're like, I think we said that already.

I think we've said that.

I do that on the, like, I've been doing the dollar for 10 years.

There are times where I'm like, I believe I've done this guy five times.

Like, this little stupid character, you hacky old man.

We have one.

We basically just have one.

He kind of sounds like this.

So one guy that we do.

Yeah, I've got.

Oh, I forgot about that character.

That guy?

This guy.

We have a character this guy.

You're a good disguise.

What does this guy do?

What does this guy do?

What does this guy do?

Yeah.

So remind me.

Kind of a prospector.

I think so.

Yeah.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

I think he's just sort of a weird old man.

He's a weird old man.

He's like breastfeeding.

Oh, right.

He does like breastfeeding.

He likes going to mommy and me screenings.

He's just very breastfeeding.

You got to define him.

And that's perfect.

I believe he's the breastfeeding guy.

That kind of guy.

Thank you, Amelia.

Thank you.

Yeah.

The men couldn't prompt that specific detail.

So, yeah, where were we?

Where were the mills?

Oh, I was asking the the Deus what you thought about the breakfast burritos because you both got one.

I was saying that it reminded me of just like a classic bodega

sausage, egg, and cheese sandwich or like on a bagel.

Like it had that East Coast flair to it.

Bagel egg and cheese.

It seems like you like that too, huh?

I do.

I do like that, but I

like breakfast burritos.

You like a bagel egg and cheese more than a breakfast burrito?

Yeah.

It's a fine take.

Interesting, interesting, interesting.

Eyewitness.

I thought it was like, yeah, pretty like middle-of-the-road breakfast burrito,

but I also would prefer a bacon, egg, and cheese.

Interesting, interesting, interesting.

So you two are just sitting over there the whole time.

I like a breakfast burrito.

We like breakfast burrito.

I like prefer a bacon, egg, and cheese.

Yeah, you're not arguing.

You're like, what you're arguing is that breakfast burritos are.

They're all right.

People go a little crazy about them.

No, people like them.

I like them.

They're fine.

They're very fine.

What I think we can all agree on, you can get,

especially in L.A., which is where Randy's is geolocated, you can get better breakfast burritos at dozens of places.

They're much better execution.

You know what?

Breakfast burrito I actually do like, and it's not a great opinion, but I like the Oaks gourmet breakfast burrito.

I think it's good.

And you know what it is?

It's runny eggs.

And I think a lot of breakfast burritos are just scrambled eggs.

That's interesting.

See, that I don't love.

I don't love the runny eggs.

They do like an over-mediate.

I will, when I've gotten the breakfast burrito over there for before, which is good, but I would ask for, like, can you just give me like an over-hard egg?

Like, she's like, I like that.

Like, yeah, just cook it.

Anything that takes me off the thinking that it is like a baby.

That's helpful.

The runny to me, I'm like, oh, right.

It's

an embryo.

Yeah, yes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't mind the runny egg like in different contexts, but in this one, it's just like, it's such a mess.

Yeah, it is also, yeah, that's a home-based thing.

Yeah.

Can't be like in the car when you're like, oh, God.

Right.

Because a breakfast burrito is like, what I like about it is that it's contained.

It's what I like.

I mean, to me, that's what makes it so much better than the breakfast sandwich.

You can get it not runny with the breakfast sandwich as well.

But I mean, come on, you're missing that one.

Stuff's dropping out of it.

It's jail.

It's pooping all over the place.

I love it.

This fall, the Food and Wine Classic in Charleston returns November 14th through the 16th for three days of incredible food, wine, and southern hospitality in one of the country's most charming cities.

You'll experience grand tastings, cooking demonstrations, and beverage seminars featuring top chefs, wine and spirits experts, and the bold seasonal flavors of the low country.

It's a weekend built for discovery, connection, and unforgettable culinary moments.

Tickets are going fast, so head to foodandwineclassicincharleston.com to grab yours before they're gone.

We should get to our final thoughts on Randy's doughnuts.

So, Gareth, here's how this will work.

We'll each go around.

We will give a closing argument, if you will, on Randy's, and then end by giving it a score from zero to five forks.

So, your final thoughts on Randy's based on this and any other previous visits, and then your fork score.

Well, it's been a while since I've had donuts on that level.

Right.

So, my mouth definitely got overrun with sugar.

But when we were in there, I honestly, in my head, I was like,

I was like, I wanted to participate in the event, but I was like, I'm not going to go crazy on the donuts.

And I had a piece of every donut because every single, this is, I guess, what I kind of forgot about donuts, or what he, and I know I didn't say donuts properly, but that's just atrophy.

I, what I sort of forgot, or what they do very well, is there's so many different consistencies.

Like, we're talking about some, there's the thicker ones, there's the more croissant ones.

There, like there's the classic donut that's kind of airy.

But I don't honestly, there were like a couple where I was like, not crazy about it, but that's just because, like, even the red velvet one that I suggested was a little too cakey for me.

Sure.

I thought the OG glaze was maybe my favorite, or the like croissant glaze, or the churro one, which I know I ordered.

I'm not bragging.

But also the chocolate one that you're talking about.

Which I ordered.

They were just, they were all so good.

And

it was a nostalgic eat.

I thought they were made very well, even though they completely screwed us.

Switch me to cameras mind.

Randy, if you're alive, we're coming for you.

And if you're dead, so sorry to do this.

We're digging you up, though.

We're digging you up.

We're going to reanimate you through your bones and fight you with hammers, man.

That's happening.

But

if you are in the mood for a donut

and they have franchised the shit out of the place, I'm going to go.

I will say, donut-wise, it is five forks.

Wow, five forks.

Yeah.

That's a great score.

Yeah.

Mitch, what do you mean?

Your thoughts are your fork score.

You boost up what I was even going to think of.

Well, I just don't think, like, I think, like, there wasn't one where I was like, this donut was not.

They are maybe the best donuts.

They might be the best donuts I've had.

And I have had voodoo, and I really like voodoo.

I like voodoo too.

And I think that

we were maybe harsher to voodoo when we reviewed it.

I'm less enthused about voodoo because I think as voodoo has expanded,

I think the quality has declined a bit.

I've had good voodoo donuts, but the thing with voodoo donuts is, and this is an issue with all donuts, but there were some here when I was trying them that it didn't give me like...

the full like this is too much sugar and there were moments that were like that but like that chocolate glazed, I was like, this is like a nice balance.

It's sugary, sure.

Yes.

All of them are sugary.

But it was like, this is a nice balance as a donut.

And then when I'm just, when I'm eating voodoo donuts, I'm like, it's so sweet.

They're so, so damn sweet.

And while you feel like sugared up from that meal, it wasn't like we were talking about how you're going to feel tired.

I don't feel tired after it.

I didn't feel like the crash necessarily, which I don't know if that's an ingredient base for you.

My guts are the only thing that really were affected by all of this.

Yeah.

And look, I still had a great time.

I played a character named Randy Wigs.

That's right.

So it's close to my heart.

The name Randy is

close to my heart.

I like Randy.

The Simpsons reference that you said, where Homer is sleeping in the big donut is fun.

There's a number of them.

There's that.

There's eventually the Lard Lad Donuts.

That's the thing that influences becomes reality.

Yeah, based on Bob's Big Boy and Randy's Donuts.

Now that that's like a thing.

The one I kept thinking of in there was when Homer goes to hell.

Yes.

And the devil is feeding him the donuts.

And he goes, you like donuts?

Yeah.

Here, have some donuts.

And he eats all of them.

Oh, donuts.

And they're confused by the machine that don't.

The devil's like, oh, my God.

And then they put the donut on his head, Wags, at the end as a punishment.

That's right.

Flanders, Devil, Flanders.

Anyways, Simpsons was great.

Great show.

Where I also I worked.

I've talked about that on the podcast for a very, for,

but I worked there for a good stretch of time.

I love the big donut.

i do think it's a great

i'm happy that it just hasn't disappeared because we've talked about this wages so many landmarks like the and here i'm gonna i'm gonna say here the arc arc light has been closed for so long and i don't know if it will ever reopen again they're just sitting on it and it's a shame wages it's a shame that it's uh that it's a that it's that it's that's maybe will just go away this this is a landmark for people not in la landmark movie theater yeah and they're just sitting on it no one is reopening it amoeba another one amoeba yeah, which they did reopen Amoeba at least, but it went to a new spot.

But just all these things in Los Angeles, and it's just a sad thing where like all these great old places are closing.

And Randy's feels like it should be around for a long time because of this.

Thank you to this Vegas magnate that's come in.

And he gives us shitty drinks, but the donuts remain good.

And I can't go below four forks.

I think I'm going to go four and a half forks.

Wow, four and a half forks.

These are high scores, higher than I expected.

And

I will say this, because my skepticism of this episode going in was knowing that Randy's had under new ownership and had expanded into a chain in the past decade and worried about its just quality declining, which is a pattern we've seen, Mitch, repeatedly.

Like, you know, halal guys was a big one.

The New Yorker one that expanded nationwide.

I mean, even Shake Shack, in a sense, is a version of that.

And,

you know, like there have been ones that have succeeded there, like Dave's Hot Chicken, like Kai Poke expanded and kind of was able to retain

what works about it.

I was worried about that with Randy's a little bit, but I will say, I think this is, I mean, it is Randy's.

I mean, like, and I think they're retaining what's special about this donut shop.

And then I think there's another thing that makes me, that I think of, that you formulated in the past, Mitch, of like, we're now at the point where you kind of have to rooting for the little guy is also rooting for a chain restaurant.

restaurant because you know so many small businesses have just been completely uh you know absorbed or assimilated or extinguished and so the the independent mom and pop donut shops those are a dying breed the the randy's franchise locations are kind of like the equivalent equivalent of that now um versus some of these ones like these these bigger concepts like a dunkin or a krispy cream and i will say i think their donuts are just better than dunkin's donuts yes and and and that's a that's a sad thing to report because dunkin used to make their donuts in-house as randy still does.

But Duncan now makes everything in a corporate kitchen.

Krispy Kreme, I'm not sure.

It doesn't have like the killer app in the same way that Krispy Kreme has that fresh, hot, glazed, which is so, so good.

But it does have some great in-house donuts.

And again, I like that it's not trying to be a gimmicky place like voodoo.

I like that it's not trying to be an upscale gentrified place like Blue Star Donuts or Sidecar Donuts.

It's remaining in the sphere in which the original.

Randy's has always operated.

And for that reason, I think I'm going to say, welcome to the Golden Plate Club Randy's Donuts.

I'm going going to go four forks, four forks even, because I think it's a great donut shop.

And I think a lot of the other stuff they don't need to be doing.

But as far as donuts are concerned, as far as the promise of the premise, Randy's Donuts delivers on donuts.

Wow.

Wow.

Deus, what do you think, Deus?

I think that's a solid assessment.

I give it four as well.

Wow.

Wow.

Four forks.

Wow.

Wow.

Four forks all around.

How about that?

I love it.

Yeah.

Good.

Well-deserved welcome to the golden plate.

Welcome to the Golden Plate Club.

And remember, this is after they screwed us out of a donut.

That is true, right?

I mean, to have that personal vendetta remain

after such high acclaim.

It's really shocking.

We could kick it out of the Golden Play Club for that reason.

Oh, well, boy, that is, it's highly unorthodox.

Yeah.

Doughboy's choice is that it's in the Golden Play Club.

I think so.

I think we're going to take the high ground versus Randy.

Yeah.

And who's Dolly?

It's in the low ground from what we're talking about.

I could not get closure on whether or not Randy is still alive as I was hastily googling it.

Wow.

But it did transfer ownership in the 70s.

So I think probably on to our, you know, he's not still with us, but what a legacy.

Hey, it's time for a segment.

We got a beverage we're going to decide if you should pour it down your throat.

It's drink or stink.

And hey, we haven't had enough sweet yet today.

It's time for a sugary beverage, Mountain Dew Mango Rush.

Here's what's incredible.

Yeah.

As we talk about the sort of the conflation of organizations and enormous businesses, to see the little Caesars man on a Mountain Dew.

Yeah.

I don't know how that makes me feel.

I've got the tall boy can.

I've got the tall boy can up here that I'm holding to lens.

This is an exclusive Little Caesars flavor.

Why is

refreshing Mountain Dew with a kick of mango?

What are we doing?

Let me read the copy here.

One thing Mountain Dew and Little Caesars fans both share is a thirst for adventurous flavors.

With Mountain Dew Mango Rush, our goal was to collaborate with Little Caesars to create a new, refreshing beverage that pizza and dew enthusiasts will love.

What?

All right.

What are they doing?

I don't know.

But here we are.

Oh, my lord.

The idea that they're like, we need to bring in an expert.

How about little Caesars?

All right.

I do like the little Caesar guy.

I do too.

I love the little guy.

He's a fun little guy.

He beat the Noy.

He did beat.

He did beat.

He beat the Noid.

It's got a good stink.

He beat him mercilessly with a hammer.

Wow.

Who knew the Noy's blood was green?

This is potent.

Wow.

That is.

This brings back.

this puts me in a basement wages with again, like the Hammer Brothers.

This is like a summertime, it just feels like a summertime drink of me drinking the most sugary drink in my basement playing video games.

Sugar is high in that.

Sugar is high.

This is super sweet.

And

one of these cans, is the serving size one can?

Yeah, one can has 57 grams of sugar, which is 114% of your daily.

Okay, so we're pretty good for the day.

I don't think we should have sugar tomorrow, is what they're saying.

Skip breakfast.

I don't know.

I mean, that's what I don't know about.

If you want to just get all your sugar done in a day, you just drink that.

You just don't drink 14%.

Well, that's where I believe Little Caesar came in.

I mean, he really recognizes how nutrition should go.

I mean, that guy, I've looked to that guy for a lot of diet stuff.

Can I say the canned design I love?

This is the thing about this I really like.

I like that little Little Caesars guy is on here, and I like that it's a Little Caesars exclusive, and I like that that it's not like, because they'll do these flavors at, you know, Taco Bell or Buffalo Wild Wings or what have you, but you don't have a unique can.

Yeah.

And that's a lot of fun.

I got news for you.

Yeah.

I think the drink is also good.

It's, it's hard for me.

This is so foreign to some, I've not had a drink like this in a long time.

It is delicious.

It's in the very artificial, delicious realm, but it is very good.

It kind of reminds me of like a cactus cooler.

Yeah.

Like it's like kind of in there talking, which I think think is like an orange pineapple soap.

If I left the hospital with bad news and it was like, it's terminal.

It's over.

I'd be like, I'll just drink these.

Why not?

I'll just crush these in the house all day.

A few months later, you're cured.

Wait, what?

Remission, remission.

It's him, the little Caesar guy.

The doctor sadly puts down his spatula and bun.

What were you going to do?

Nothing, nothing.

Nothing.

I think if Emma was here, a former bartender, she would suggest maybe spiking this business.

I feel like if you put a little booze in this, it could maybe wake it up a little bit.

I was just thinking, me and

a crew of college kids.

Let's go.

Now, are you in college at the time?

I'm still younger, but I am.

I like that a lot.

It's a back-to-school scenario.

I don't like that a lot for you.

I'm there with my long lens camera, just snapping pictures.

Who is that?

You're in like that old combat bush thing they had under catch a predator.

That bush is taking pictures.

Who's the bush?

A fucking checkin' barstool.com drinking, drinking some reading FHM.

Hell yeah.

Hell yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

The kids would have no idea what the fuck FHM is.

Okay, well, because they got too much internet.

FHM used to be classy playbook.

Yes.

You could read it on the bus.

You could.

I would get Maxim Magazine when on flights.

Even when I lived in Los Angeles, I would get a Maxim Magazine like for a year or or two when I lived in LA.

Do you remember?

They had good articles.

But they used to, that was the cover.

Do you remember, like everyone would be that?

But do you remember when you go to the airport and they used to sell Playboy in like penthouse?

And then you'd like be on the plane and there would be a guy just with a Pornboy

and you'd be like, sir, what the fuck?

Like, what are we doing?

Yeah, which is, which, which is, which is strange because I don't usually see people watching porno on the plane.

I did see a guy do it once.

Oh, geez.

I think people are doing it.

I mean, that's the same guy.

That's the equivalent now of that, was a person looking at a Playboy.

We cannot cross that line.

We have to be very careful.

We can't be watching porn in public.

If we watch porn in public, it is over as a society.

The maxim was a nice...

in between of like uh you know you're like it's horny but you're not it's not new you know there's no new 10 ways to yell four on a golf course you know and you'd be like oh i'm fucking awesome again i'm not sure we have more glasses but i'm gonna hand this can over to the the deus if you want to open that up yeah then there'll be an article like i spent like three weeks in iraq during the ira and you're like holy shit Like, this is like a, like, a

little bit.

Oh, yeah.

And then you'd be like, I can see her nipples through the wet shirt.

What is this magazine?

Ah, boy.

I feel like the thing is, it's so drank for me, baby.

It's so situational.

It's because it's so punishingly sweet.

I could not drink a whole can of this myself, I don't think.

But if on the context, I'm like, hey, we're getting a little Caesars.

We're going to have some fun.

And someone

had some of this to share.

I don't know.

I might cut loose and have a little bit of Mountain Dew mango rest.

I guess I'll probably say mild drink for me.

It's just, it's, it also is just like really, really sweet.

It's very sweet.

Yeah.

I'd go drink as well.

I mean, it is like, you know, what are we doing here?

I know exactly how to plus this up.

What is that?

Your suggestion to spike it is perfect.

I would put some

seltzer water in here.

Oh, that's fun.

And then spike it.

And it is, it's a home run.

Because it's got a little bit of effervescence, but you could, you could plus it up even further, really make it bubbly.

Maybe a little topo to the salt.

There's the alchemist.

There's the alchemist.

You're really stealing this call.

You're really stealing Barry from Sandwich of History.

I know exactly how to plus this up.

It is.

I agree with that.

It's carbonated, but also flat when you start drinking kind of strange.

It's more juice-like.

Yeah.

I don't know exactly.

It reminds me of

those tall boy cans.

Yeah, right.

Maybe it's something with a tall boy can because you would open like a Bud-like tall boy can and it would sometimes feel flat.

So I don't know if it's something with the big can.

The tall boy technology.

Yeah.

The tariffs are killing the tall boy.

I won't break politics anything.

Just like a restaurant about your feedback, let's open up the feedback.

And today we have an email from Jordan.

Jordan writes, I was at my local grocery store today leaving the self-checkout when an employee walked up to a kiosk with a big cup of soup.

Another employee working the self-checkout asked her, chicken noodle, to which the employee replied, Noah, get three different soups and mix them all together.

I was already on my way out of the store and out of earshot.

So unfortunately, I was unable to hear what the combination was.

But it got me thinking, which three soups would be acceptable to mix together?

Wow.

Love the show, Burger Brigade, and Spoon Nation for life.

How about that?

A nice little bit of unity.

I love it.

You should pick a side.

Who do you want to win the hammer fight?

Get off the fence.

You got to pick a winner of the hammer fight.

This is the second 10 years.

This is how we close it out.

So, okay, I'm.

I don't know if there's an answer to this one for me, but we're going to, we're going to, look, we're going to approach this as a group.

We're going to figure this out.

This is what I think.

There's three of us.

We could put our heads together.

I I feel like we could crack three soups.

I think the big thing is you don't want like a

you don't want like a seafood chowder and like a turkey chili.

Like those feel like those are pretty optimal.

That's like when you'd make the drink at the restaurant for your friend to drink for like $20.

Yeah.

No, I agree.

In my head, I'm starting to think of some combos.

Like I'm googling soups, by the way.

Again, it's the third time.

I feel like you could mix like, you know, like a minestrone and like a tomato could probably work.

My mind immediately went to minestrone, and I think tomato is a great.

So now you're like, you're getting just a little bit richer tomato flavor in this minestrone soup.

I like this.

How about a lentil or a black bean or something?

Yeah, I think that's now we're talking.

The minestrone has beans.

Kyra.

That can work.

All right.

What about a vegetable soup?

Could the minestrone go with the...

I mean, I think that, like,

or.

Do it.

Do we do we add some sort of chowder in one?

Do we thicken this thing up?

You are mad.

What I worry about with the...

I just feel like the chowder is so specific and so singular that once you start to put chowder in there, it might start to dominate.

Like, if we, you know, I don't know.

It could work.

But I'm just like, like,

I feel like I'd feel better about a corn chowder versus like a clam chowder.

Oh, of course.

Yeah.

We're not just going to throw clams in there.

That's what we're worried about.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

Look, guys, this isn't the hammer time.

Calm that down.

No, I think I could see something like a corn chowder working in there.

It's a little thicker, but it could probably play.

I think the tomato will complement the minestrone.

Or is it minestrone?

Do we know?

I think it's strone.

Okay, good.

It's minestrone.

What?

Mestrone?

Yeah, I've said it minestrone my whole life.

Is it tomato or tomato?

The proper Italian is minestrone, but the Italian-American is minestrone.

There we go.

And that's what you are.

You're Italian-American.

It's appropriation.

Do you say mangione or mangion?

I say mangione.

Okay, guys.

You say free mangion.

So why don't we take a tomato and a

Mix them together.

I have an answer.

Okay.

Minestrone soup is one of the answers.

Okay.

Tomato soup also is one of the answers.

Okay.

The last one, Wags?

Tortellini soup.

Ooh, wow.

Now you're getting some fucking tortellini in there, too.

You're thinking on this?

I feel like you're cheating by getting two Italian soups in there.

I feel like you're cheating.

They're two adjacent Italian soups.

Yeah, you're a little bit of a drink.

Tourism and a Minerone.

You're throwing an Italian wedding as well?

I mean, what are we talking about?

Sure.

What?

Is that against the rules there?

It's not necessarily against the rules.

I just feel like you're saying, like, oh, we'll get tomato soup and we'll get like a tomato bisque and we'll also get like a cream of tomato.

You know, it's like these are also adjacent.

It's kind of.

All right, fuck you.

I'm going to change it.

I don't know.

Whoa.

Tomato soup.

Uh-huh.

Tortellini soup.

Okay.

Turkey chili.

The chili is wild.

Chili's interesting.

Wild.

I wonder if you could do like a butternut squash or something too, or if that's too like, that's too much.

Butternut squash.

I don't know.

I'm just picking.

I don't hate it.

I don't hate it.

Gazpacho.

Gazpacho.

That's interesting because that's too much.

So, wait, you're just going to warm up.

Soup's too hot.

Time will be your gazpacho.

Give it time.

Amelia, that's a good point.

If you put three hot soups together, that's the hotness times three is going to be extra hot.

That's a great point.

That's what you blow on it for.

Yeah, that's true.

But then also,

if you got a gazpacho, hell, you got the perfect tap.

If it's too hot, what if you're over gazpacho?

Then what are we doing?

We're acting like we don't have access to electronics or appliances in this world.

Gazpacho is just one of the three.

So I think it would cool down the perfect amount.

You're over there eating the three hot soups, burning your mouth for it.

I'm waiting.

I'm not rushing into anything, first of all.

I'm patiently waiting the old-fashioned way.

You know what I'm remembering?

Is California Pizza Kitchen, CPK?

I don't know if they still do it, but they used to do a thing where you get multiple soups in the same bowl.

The two divider, the split pea, it was the split pee and something else.

Here's the thing.

These two worked together, and it was a surprising combo.

It was

tortilla and pea soup.

Pea soup.

It does sound wild, but then you have them together.

It's like, oh, this is kind of working.

They know what they're doing over the season.

This lady at the checkout was fucking.

She was onto something.

So maybe the whole thing is maybe you just put three soups together and it just ends up working out.

Because, you know, ultimately it's all flavorful.

Can we think of bad soups that wouldn't work together?

Oof.

I mean, like maybe like a French onion.

I think a clam chow.

If you throw it, the clam chowder can throw off most mixes.

Yeah, if you did like a French onion with a big layer of Gruyere and then threw a clam chowder in there, that would probably be repulsive.

That'd be bad.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think we figured it out.

Yeah.

I think we did figure it out.

I think we figured it out.

I agree.

We got some good options there.

If you have a question or comment about the World War ICHA restaurants, you can email us at feedback at birdfuck.com or leave us a voiceover.

No, it's 830 godo.

That's 830-463-6844.

What's that, Mitch?

You know, I'm this guy who gets attacked because I said rank soups.

Soup, pho.

Yeah.

Ramen.

People got mad at me because they're all soups.

Yeah.

But interestingly enough, when we're combining soups, we're not talking about ramen.

We're not talking about pho.

So interesting.

Interesting.

I think you should look at yourself in the mirror a little bit.

You too, the listener/slash viewer.

I wonder where, yeah, once you start slotting pho and ramen in there, because also you got different subtypes.

Yeah, I could see those two mixing together.

Yeah.

Fa and ramen?

Yeah.

They would.

They could.

Yeah.

But also you could.

Throw a little chowder in there.

Yeah.

But you could have all sorts of, you could have all sorts of bases for any of those and all sorts of little visions.

I'm just saying, my soup think comment wasn't that crazy.

That's the whole point.

You're being extra defensive because you went out on a limb with with your breakfast burrito take, and then everyone lashed out at you.

And so now you're turtling up.

I'm trying to be a forward-thinking man.

What do you want from me?

Can I just say, Mitch, that's awesome.

Yeah, God bless you.

That is awesome.

I think there's not enough of that risk-taking in the direction of just being supportive nowadays.

And I think, in retrospect, we did lose our cool on you.

Yeah, we did.

We did.

And because we hated what you said, but we

should have been more understanding.

To you, you were just trying to be supportive of other ways to have a breakfast

wrapping.

Thank you.

And

also,

you're going to push me away, radicalize me.

I join a turtle power group.

No, without a mitch, no.

Yeah, no.

Next thing you know, you're a hero.

Not a ninja.

Not a ninja.

Our producer is Emma Erdbrink.

Our associate producer is Amelia Marino.

Our supervising video producer is Casey Donahue.

And our video editor is Mike Dorfman, Doughboys Apparel Merchandise, Kinship Goods.com slash Doughboys.

And DoughboysDouble, Patreon.com/slash slash doughboys.

Gareth Reynolds.

Next, we have is the podcast out today.

Tell us about the show and anything else you want to plug.

Well, it is, like I said, I mean, it's just a tremendous amount of quick-hitting little segments.

There are reviews.

We sometimes have guests.

My mother joins us.

We play games.

Kevin, the great Kevin Bartelt is a part of it.

And it's just fun.

I think it is one of those ones.

Like, I have the dollop, which people should listen to, which is American history.

It can get very depressing.

We try to bring light to it.

We're here to help with Jake Johnson, which is a call-and-advice show, which is also a head gun production.

And then this is just a little bit like that.

If you want to see me do stand-up on the road, you can go to garethreynolds.com.

But yeah, follow me on all the bullshit.

I'm going to say this, but

I feel like it never feels like a compliment.

But what a potter.

You're a potter.

I'm out of control.

Titan of podcasting.

The dollop, you you know, like all your shows are great with the dollopud, you know, obviously such a totemic podcast.

I love the show.

My wife is a huge fan of the dollop.

Oh, nice.

And

it's great to finally have you on the show.

No, I really, I honestly like how I've known about you guys and listened to your show for, you know, you've been around like us.

Like when you truly,

if we did a crossover, the dolop, imagine that.

Oh, my God.

Holy shit.

But

no, truly like have wanted to be on your podcast forever.

So it is a pleasure.

Well, we're happy to have you we'll have you and we'll have you back and i'm telling you the second 10 is where you guys that's where the contention can carry you through that's where you guys

and uh second 10 years 10 more years it's crazy i mean when you started this did any part of you think this this would be going this long no no no no no no no you're like what are we doing here no no this is weird i mean listen to him say no it's no

he's got no it's a yeah he's got a hammer in his soul when he's

thanks so much for being here thank you no congratulations Next, we have.

Everyone should check it out.

That'll do it for this episode of Doughboys.

And until next time for the Smooth Man, McMitchell, I'm Tiger White.

You're happy eating.

See ya.

That was a head gum podcast.